1
00:00:35,244 --> 00:00:37,246
["Father Christmas"
by The Kinks playing]

2
00:00:51,177 --> 00:00:54,388
<i>♪ When I was small
I believed in Santa Claus ♪</i>

3
00:00:54,472 --> 00:00:56,682
<i>♪ Though I knew it was my dad ♪</i>

4
00:00:57,433 --> 00:01:00,436
<i>♪ And I would hang up
My stocking at Christmas ♪</i>

5
00:01:00,519 --> 00:01:02,897
<i>♪ Open my presents
And I'd be glad ♪</i>

6
00:01:03,731 --> 00:01:06,609
<i>♪ But the last time I played
Father Christmas ♪</i>

7
00:01:06,692 --> 00:01:08,861
<i>♪ I stood outside
A department store ♪</i>

8
00:01:10,029 --> 00:01:12,948
<i>♪ A gang of kids came over
And mugged me ♪</i>

9
00:01:13,032 --> 00:01:15,326
<i>♪ And knocked my reindeer
To the floor ♪</i>

10
00:01:16,869 --> 00:01:20,748
<i>♪ They said Father Christmas
Give us some money ♪</i>

11
00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:23,667
<i>♪ Don't mess around
With those silly toys ♪</i>

12
00:01:23,751 --> 00:01:26,420
<i>♪ We'll beat you up
If you don't hand it over ♪</i>

13
00:01:27,129 --> 00:01:29,840
<i>♪ We want your bread
So don't make us annoyed ♪</i>

14
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:32,051
<i>♪ Give all the toys ♪</i>

15
00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:35,095
♪ <i>To the little rich boys ♪</i>

16
00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:41,352
<i>♪ Father Christmas
Give us some money ♪</i>

17
00:01:41,977 --> 00:01:44,772
<i>♪ Don't mess around
With those silly toys ♪</i>

18
00:01:44,855 --> 00:01:47,566
<i>♪ We'll beat you up
If you don't hand it over ♪</i>

19
00:01:48,192 --> 00:01:51,362
<i>♪ We want your bread
So don't make us annoyed ♪</i>

20
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:52,905
<i>♪ Give all the toys ♪</i>

21
00:01:53,781 --> 00:01:55,908
<i>♪ To the little rich boys ♪</i>

22
00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:06,961
[song fades]

23
00:02:20,349 --> 00:02:21,349
[Selina yowls]

24
00:02:22,434 --> 00:02:23,352
[grunts]

25
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:25,521
Master Wayne, come along now.

26
00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:27,857
Time for your cookie-wookies
before bedtime.

27
00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:29,817
Not yet, Alfred.

28
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:30,985
Selina stole priceless art

29
00:02:31,068 --> 00:02:32,820
- from the Gotham City Museum.
- [meows]

30
00:02:32,903 --> 00:02:34,822
[in gruff voice]
I must have justice.

31
00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:36,532
[Damian grunts]

32
00:02:36,615 --> 00:02:37,700
[laughing]

33
00:02:38,242 --> 00:02:39,827
- Ha!
- [meows]

34
00:02:41,537 --> 00:02:42,537
[grunts]

35
00:02:43,414 --> 00:02:45,541
Phew! Close one, huh, Alfred?

36
00:02:45,624 --> 00:02:47,001
Close indeed.

37
00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:49,044
Now, let's end this madcappery

38
00:02:49,128 --> 00:02:50,588
before you actually do break...

39
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:51,922
[loud crash]

40
00:02:52,006 --> 00:02:54,675
something like your great
grandfather's ashes.

41
00:02:54,758 --> 00:02:56,760
- [loud clattering]
- And that priceless Picasso.

42
00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:57,844
[ripping]

43
00:02:58,596 --> 00:02:59,597
[Damian laughing]

44
00:03:00,472 --> 00:03:01,472
[meows]

45
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:05,769
There's no way to run, Selina.

46
00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:07,396
- [yowls]
- [grunts]

47
00:03:12,735 --> 00:03:13,736
[Selina meows]

48
00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:17,113
Ah-ha!

49
00:03:18,407 --> 00:03:19,658
[blows raspberry]

50
00:03:21,744 --> 00:03:23,996
Young man, may I remind you

51
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:26,707
that Christmas is a mere
two days away?

52
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:29,084
Father Christmas is watching.

53
00:03:29,168 --> 00:03:32,630
Good! 'Cause even Santa
wouldn't wanna miss this.

54
00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,006
[laughs]

55
00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:35,382
- [meows]
- Ha!

56
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:36,966
[meows]

57
00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:39,720
[Damian] Whoa!

58
00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:41,554
Master Wayne.

59
00:03:42,765 --> 00:03:44,683
Will you be sleeping
down there again?

60
00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,352
- [yowls]
- [screaming]

61
00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:48,938
Whoa!

62
00:03:49,021 --> 00:03:50,397
- [thudding]
- [groaning]

63
00:03:52,775 --> 00:03:53,775
[meows]

64
00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:55,611
[thudding]

65
00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:56,694
Whoa!

66
00:03:57,863 --> 00:03:59,114
No. No. No, no, no.

67
00:03:59,198 --> 00:04:00,115
- [thud]
- [yowls]

68
00:04:00,199 --> 00:04:01,283
Whoa!

69
00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:03,702
[grunts] Whoa!

70
00:04:03,786 --> 00:04:05,454
[groans]

71
00:04:07,122 --> 00:04:08,332
[meows]

72
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:09,583
[groaning]

73
00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:16,006
What?

74
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:22,262
[beeping]

75
00:04:22,346 --> 00:04:24,598
[dramatic music playing]

76
00:04:24,682 --> 00:04:25,766
Uh-oh.

77
00:04:27,101 --> 00:04:28,519
[metal clinking]

78
00:04:29,353 --> 00:04:31,855
[chuckles nervously]
How's it going?

79
00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:34,525
[gasps] Oh, my gosh!

80
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:36,610
Are you okay?
Did you fall through that vent?

81
00:04:36,694 --> 00:04:38,237
Damian, you could've
gotten hurt.

82
00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,600
You shouldn't play with the cat.

83
00:04:39,655 --> 00:04:41,490
You could've gotten
scratched, or worse!

84
00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:42,717
You could've gotten
a brain parasite

85
00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:44,076
from its fecal matter.

86
00:04:44,743 --> 00:04:45,743
[meows]

87
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:47,663
[gasps] A boo-boo!

88
00:04:48,247 --> 00:04:49,373
Aw, Dad!

89
00:04:49,456 --> 00:04:50,749
Quit worrying so much.

90
00:04:50,833 --> 00:04:52,126
I'm totally fine.

91
00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:54,086
The HVAC unit broke
my fall, see?

92
00:04:54,169 --> 00:04:55,504
[crackling]

93
00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:56,588
[fart sound plays]

94
00:04:58,841 --> 00:04:59,841
Yeah.

95
00:05:00,426 --> 00:05:03,762
Damian, what have we said
about being more careful

96
00:05:03,846 --> 00:05:06,390
and less destructive when
you're playing superhero?

97
00:05:06,473 --> 00:05:08,475
I'm not playing, Dad.
I'm training.

98
00:05:08,559 --> 00:05:10,602
To be a real hero. Like you.

99
00:05:11,186 --> 00:05:13,939
Picture it. You and me
fighting back to back.

100
00:05:14,023 --> 00:05:15,941
Fearless defenders of the night.

101
00:05:16,025 --> 00:05:18,485
Protecting the weak.
Punishing the wicked.

102
00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:20,487
Crime doesn't stand a chance.

103
00:05:21,155 --> 00:05:22,406
Uh-huh. And I've told you,

104
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:24,450
you're not ready
for that kind of stuff.

105
00:05:24,533 --> 00:05:25,552
Because being
a superhero takes...

106
00:05:25,576 --> 00:05:28,871
[together] Focus,
responsibility and sacrifice.

107
00:05:28,954 --> 00:05:30,164
I know. I know.

108
00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:32,583
Not to mention a pretty
high pain threshold.

109
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:34,293
You know how many ribs
I've broken?

110
00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:35,377
All of them.

111
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:39,548
Cool! I want to break
all of my ribs, too.

112
00:05:39,631 --> 00:05:40,841
Come on, kiddo.

113
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:42,593
Now look, even if I thought
you were ready

114
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:44,803
to be a crime fighter,
which I don't,

115
00:05:44,887 --> 00:05:47,389
there isn't any crime
left in Gotham to fight.

116
00:05:47,473 --> 00:05:48,807
What do you mean?

117
00:05:48,891 --> 00:05:51,351
Damian? The day I found out
I was going to be a dad

118
00:05:51,435 --> 00:05:53,312
was the happiest day
I've had since...

119
00:05:54,271 --> 00:05:55,939
Well, a long time.

120
00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,143
It's like in one instant,
the only thing that mattered

121
00:05:58,192 --> 00:06:00,027
was protecting you
from ever getting hurt.

122
00:06:00,736 --> 00:06:02,237
So before you were born,

123
00:06:02,321 --> 00:06:04,490
I worked overtime
to make Gotham safe.

124
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:07,926
- [grunts]
- [heavy metal music playing]

125
00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:10,286
[screaming]

126
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:12,038
[screams, groans]

127
00:06:13,165 --> 00:06:14,333
[screaming]

128
00:06:16,085 --> 00:06:17,711
- [tires screeching]
- [siren wailing]

129
00:06:18,504 --> 00:06:20,184
- [birds chirping]
- [mellow music playing]

130
00:06:22,091 --> 00:06:23,568
- [heavy metal music playing]
- [alarm blaring]

131
00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:24,927
[laughs]

132
00:06:26,428 --> 00:06:27,763
What was that?

133
00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:29,598
[grunting and groaning]

134
00:06:29,681 --> 00:06:32,017
- [children laughing]
- [mellow music playing]

135
00:06:32,101 --> 00:06:33,477
[heavy metal music playing]

136
00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:35,580
- [mellow music playing]
<i>- In breaking news,</i>

137
00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:37,147
<i>all of Gotham City's
supervillains</i>

138
00:06:37,231 --> 00:06:39,149
<i>are now either behind bars</i>

139
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:41,026
<i>or have been forced
into retirement.</i>

140
00:06:41,110 --> 00:06:44,279
<i>Gotham is officially
90 days crime free</i>

141
00:06:44,363 --> 00:06:46,865
<i>as Batman continues
to clean it up.</i>

142
00:06:46,949 --> 00:06:48,617
<i>Gotham City just voted</i>

143
00:06:48,700 --> 00:06:50,828
<i>the safest place
on planet Earth.</i>

144
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:51,911
[all cheering]

145
00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:56,125
There is no more crime
in Gotham.

146
00:06:57,126 --> 00:06:58,710
So enjoy being a kid.

147
00:06:58,794 --> 00:07:00,504
But I don't wanna be just a kid.

148
00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,132
Whoa! You are way more
than just a kid.

149
00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:04,715
You're "my" kid.

150
00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:07,052
- And that's the best kind.
- [giggling]

151
00:07:07,136 --> 00:07:08,846
[both laugh]

152
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:12,766
Wait, Dad, what were you doing
down in the basement anyway?

153
00:07:12,850 --> 00:07:14,893
Me? Oh, uh, I don't know.

154
00:07:14,977 --> 00:07:16,228
Maybe I was, uh...

155
00:07:16,311 --> 00:07:18,856
[chuckling] ...wrapping
someone's Christmas present.

156
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,440
- [laughing]
- Yes! What is it?

157
00:07:20,524 --> 00:07:22,734
Tell me. Tell me. Tell me.
Tell me. Tell me.

158
00:07:22,818 --> 00:07:24,528
Sorry, sport. Bedtime.

159
00:07:24,611 --> 00:07:26,071
Can I at least get a hint?

160
00:07:26,155 --> 00:07:29,783
Let's just say it's something
no future superhero

161
00:07:29,867 --> 00:07:31,285
should be without.

162
00:07:31,368 --> 00:07:33,287
- Is it a Bat-grappling gun?
- Nope.

163
00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:36,582
- Razor-lined Bat-gauntlets.
- Good gravy. No!

164
00:07:36,665 --> 00:07:38,625
- Bat-ice skates?
- Skates?

165
00:07:38,709 --> 00:07:40,294
Now, that's just silly.

166
00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:43,297
[Damian] Is it
a Bat-laser torch?

167
00:07:43,380 --> 00:07:44,380
[Bruce] No.

168
00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:50,304
Bat-cryptographer sequencer?

169
00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:52,222
I'm not even sure what that is.

170
00:07:52,306 --> 00:07:54,558
A heat-seeking
Bat-rocket launcher?

171
00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:57,561
Nope. And you guessed
that already. Twice.

172
00:07:57,644 --> 00:07:59,563
- [laughing]
- [sips]

173
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:00,856
Master Wayne,

174
00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:03,025
stop playing with your
blood sausage.

175
00:08:03,108 --> 00:08:05,235
[together] Right, yeah,
totally. Sorry, Alfred.

176
00:08:05,319 --> 00:08:07,988
Now, let's enjoy the traditional

177
00:08:08,071 --> 00:08:10,365
Christmas Eve
breakfast of my youth.

178
00:08:10,449 --> 00:08:11,575
Best hurry.

179
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:14,494
If jellied eel sits too
long, it tends to...

180
00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:16,622
congeal.

181
00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:19,081
[slurps]

182
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,084
Mm. Mm.

183
00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:25,713
[sloshes]

184
00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:27,381
[clears throat]

185
00:08:31,220 --> 00:08:32,137
[Damian] Mm.

186
00:08:32,221 --> 00:08:34,806
[shushes] Donut tell anybody.

187
00:08:34,890 --> 00:08:36,850
[both laugh] Kapow!

188
00:08:36,934 --> 00:08:38,227
<i>♪ Da-na-na-na-na-na ♪</i>

189
00:08:38,310 --> 00:08:41,063
[slurps] And no cowls
at the table.

190
00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:43,607
Aw, come one.
It's Christmas Eve!

191
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,442
Damian, you heard Alfred.

192
00:08:53,116 --> 00:08:54,243
Hmph.

193
00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:57,246
Ah, what the heck?

194
00:08:58,580 --> 00:09:00,249
Here you go, Damian.

195
00:09:00,332 --> 00:09:03,585
Whoa! You mean
I can open it now?

196
00:09:03,669 --> 00:09:05,963
Why not? You get
to stop guessing

197
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:07,714
and I get to hear myself
think again.

198
00:09:07,798 --> 00:09:09,925
- It's a win-win.
- Mm-hm.

199
00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:11,677
Merry Christmas, kiddo.

200
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:15,973
[gasps]

201
00:09:17,349 --> 00:09:19,768
My own utility belt!

202
00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:22,813
[laughs] Yeah, that was
my first utility belt, Damian.

203
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:25,482
What? No way! Oh, man!
I can't believe it.

204
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,818
This is the best, Dad!
You're the best!

205
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:29,653
Alfred, isn't Dad the best?

206
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:32,948
- [kisses]
- Oh, my. Yes.

207
00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:34,741
This is indeed exciting.

208
00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:36,576
Oh, what did you put
in the pouches?

209
00:09:40,122 --> 00:09:41,832
That's your Bat-first-aid kit.

210
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,667
Oh, neat.

211
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,252
How about this?

212
00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:47,004
Your Bat-mergency whistle.

213
00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:48,588
Nice. [inhales]

214
00:09:48,672 --> 00:09:51,550
Which should only be used
in case of a Bat-mergency.

215
00:09:52,426 --> 00:09:53,552
[sputters]

216
00:09:53,635 --> 00:09:56,346
Whoa! A Batarang

217
00:09:56,430 --> 00:09:57,514
[laughs]

218
00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:02,477
- [meows]
- It's foam.

219
00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:05,105
But isn't it supposed to fly
back to me.

220
00:10:05,188 --> 00:10:06,440
So it can poke you in the eye?

221
00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:07,607
I don't think so.

222
00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:09,276
That's a practice Batarang.

223
00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:14,323
Dad, don't get me wrong.
I love this belt.

224
00:10:14,406 --> 00:10:16,616
I mean, I love, love, love it.

225
00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:18,285
But where's the, you know,

226
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:20,203
cool stuff?

227
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,288
You mean dangerous stuff?

228
00:10:21,913 --> 00:10:23,891
Damian, you'll have to earn
those things when you're older.

229
00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:25,417
You still have a lot to learn.

230
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:27,586
Oh, come on, Dad.
I'm not a baby.

231
00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:29,338
Hey, I never said
you were a baby.

232
00:10:29,421 --> 00:10:31,190
[Bruce over recording]
<i>Emergency! Call for help.</i>

233
00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,799
<i>My precious little baby
is in danger.</i>

234
00:10:33,884 --> 00:10:35,719
I'll re-record that for you.

235
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:40,307
Damian, this is the first step
toward becoming a superhero.

236
00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:42,434
Believe me,
I agonized for months

237
00:10:42,517 --> 00:10:43,870
over whether you're
ready for even...

238
00:10:43,894 --> 00:10:45,937
- [device ringing]
- What's that?

239
00:10:46,021 --> 00:10:48,690
- It sounds like the...
- It can't be.

240
00:10:48,774 --> 00:10:50,776
Can't be what?
What can't it be?

241
00:10:50,859 --> 00:10:52,235
The Batphone.

242
00:10:53,070 --> 00:10:55,072
Ooh, wait for me.
I'll put on my belt!

243
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:56,740
I mean... [clears throat]

244
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:57,943
[in deep voice] Wait for me.

245
00:10:57,991 --> 00:10:59,326
I'll put on my belt.

246
00:11:05,290 --> 00:11:06,416
[ringing continues]

247
00:11:07,501 --> 00:11:09,419
No one's called
this thing in years.

248
00:11:09,503 --> 00:11:11,713
Crime must be back in Gotham.

249
00:11:11,797 --> 00:11:13,799
It's a Christmas miracle!

250
00:11:14,466 --> 00:11:16,026
Hello? -[voice
chattering indistinctly]

251
00:11:16,093 --> 00:11:17,469
It's the Justice League.

252
00:11:17,552 --> 00:11:19,638
What? Are you serious?

253
00:11:19,721 --> 00:11:20,972
Quick. How's my belt look?

254
00:11:21,056 --> 00:11:23,392
Uh-huh. No, I... I hear you.

255
00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:25,644
A weather anomaly?
In Nova Scotia?

256
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:27,104
Just let Clark handle it.

257
00:11:28,313 --> 00:11:30,982
It's Christmas Eve.
We all have plans.

258
00:11:31,066 --> 00:11:33,735
No need to send Superman.
We got this.

259
00:11:33,819 --> 00:11:35,153
Sorry, that was Damian.

260
00:11:35,237 --> 00:11:37,114
Yeah, he's eight now.
Crazy, right?

261
00:11:37,823 --> 00:11:39,199
You can't call anyone else?

262
00:11:39,282 --> 00:11:40,367
How about the Twins?

263
00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:42,285
- [indistinct chatter]
- They're not talking?

264
00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:44,371
Well tell them to activate
their Wonder Twin powers

265
00:11:44,454 --> 00:11:46,331
and form into mature adults.

266
00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,084
All right. Fine.

267
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:50,668
I'll leave in five.

268
00:11:52,337 --> 00:11:54,381
Sorry, Damian. I gotta go.

269
00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:57,551
But I promise I'll be back
before Christmas.

270
00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:59,010
Wait, Dad! Dad! Dad!

271
00:11:59,094 --> 00:12:00,303
Let me come with you. Please!

272
00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:02,180
I don't think so, kiddo.

273
00:12:02,264 --> 00:12:04,683
It could be your Christmas
gift for the next year.

274
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:06,143
For the next ten years!

275
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:09,354
I can't risk it.
The answer's no.

276
00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:12,732
[Damian] Mm.

277
00:12:12,816 --> 00:12:15,277
Good. Now, where's your
emergency contact list?

278
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,360
Actually, never mind.

279
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:17,904
I printed extra copies
for your belt.

280
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:22,868
Okay. What do you do

281
00:12:22,951 --> 00:12:24,244
in the event of a home invasion?

282
00:12:24,327 --> 00:12:25,328
Call the police.

283
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:26,913
- Mental breakdown?
- Therapist.

284
00:12:26,997 --> 00:12:28,665
A race of giant,
super-intelligent

285
00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,208
fungus-beetles attack Gotham?

286
00:12:30,292 --> 00:12:32,210
I don't know.
Call Commissioner Gordon?

287
00:12:32,294 --> 00:12:34,171
Commiss... What? No!

288
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:36,047
All he ever does
is pass the buck to me.

289
00:12:37,048 --> 00:12:38,568
I'll be back before
you know it, buddy.

290
00:12:39,926 --> 00:12:42,846
I shall ready the Batjet,
Master Wayne.

291
00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:46,224
Batjet, huh?

292
00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:03,492
You're making record time

293
00:13:03,575 --> 00:13:05,452
for not having done this
in years, Bruce.

294
00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:07,287
[Batman] Did you program
the coordinates?

295
00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:09,206
And pre-heated
the seat warmer, sir.

296
00:13:11,208 --> 00:13:13,210
[clears throat] Shall I assume

297
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:16,880
we did not see the Bat-razor
I left on the vanity?

298
00:13:16,963 --> 00:13:18,340
Really? The beard again?

299
00:13:19,132 --> 00:13:22,177
I like it. It totally ups
my intimidation game.

300
00:13:24,471 --> 00:13:27,807
You have donut crumbs
in your intimidation game, sir.

301
00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:30,936
- Hm.
- [muffled alarm blaring]

302
00:13:31,019 --> 00:13:32,622
[Bruce over recording]
<i>Emergency! Call for help.</i>

303
00:13:32,646 --> 00:13:34,272
<i>My precious little baby
is in danger.</i>

304
00:13:34,356 --> 00:13:35,482
What the...

305
00:13:37,567 --> 00:13:39,402
<i>- Emergency! Call for help.</i>
- [meows]

306
00:13:39,486 --> 00:13:41,238
<i>- My precious little baby...</i>
- Come on.

307
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,114
- Damian!
- [chuckles]

308
00:13:43,198 --> 00:13:44,574
Wow! Dad!

309
00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:47,619
You look awesome!

310
00:13:47,702 --> 00:13:49,454
Damian, get out of the bag.

311
00:13:49,538 --> 00:13:51,623
Come on, Dad, just let
me come with you.

312
00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:53,875
No. We don't have
time for this.

313
00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:55,460
You won't even know I'm here.

314
00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:56,711
I told you,

315
00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:59,381
- you're not ready.
- [groans]

316
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,050
Ugh! Dad, look how hard
I've been training.

317
00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:03,444
I mean, check out
my rad ninja skills.

318
00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:05,637
- [Batman] Get over here. Argh!
- [grunting]

319
00:14:06,596 --> 00:14:08,598
Argh! My good hip. [groaning]

320
00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:10,684
Oh, my gosh! Alfred!
I'm so sorry.

321
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:14,145
Damian Thomas Wayne!
That is enough!

322
00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:18,857
I just thought

323
00:14:19,568 --> 00:14:20,819
getting your belt meant

324
00:14:21,403 --> 00:14:23,572
that I was ready to be
a superhero like you.

325
00:14:24,281 --> 00:14:25,407
Well, it didn't.

326
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:27,576
In fact, give me the belt.

327
00:14:27,659 --> 00:14:29,786
You're clearly not ready for it.

328
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:31,830
What? Dad, no!

329
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:33,914
Damian.

330
00:14:48,221 --> 00:14:50,473
Hold on to this
until I get back.

331
00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:52,100
[sighs]

332
00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:53,560
Okay. Now give me a...

333
00:14:55,103 --> 00:14:56,229
goodbye hug?

334
00:15:03,820 --> 00:15:06,239
He'll be fine, sir.
I'll see to that.

335
00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:09,409
I knew he wasn't ready
to have his own belt.

336
00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:12,871
Yes. Well,
I can certainly agree

337
00:15:12,954 --> 00:15:14,873
that "someone" wasn't ready.

338
00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:17,041
[sighs]

339
00:15:18,835 --> 00:15:20,420
I gotta get going, Alfred.

340
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:26,343
[engine powering up]

341
00:15:29,763 --> 00:15:31,097
[roaring]

342
00:15:31,181 --> 00:15:32,891
Godspeed, sir.

343
00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:53,745
Come along, Damian.

344
00:15:54,329 --> 00:15:57,290
I've got just the thing
to lift your spirits.

345
00:15:57,374 --> 00:16:00,710
A steaming mug of my
world-famous hot cocoa.

346
00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:02,796
With extra marshmallows.

347
00:16:03,421 --> 00:16:06,049
Thanks, but coco's
kinda kid stuff.

348
00:16:06,132 --> 00:16:07,425
"Kid stuff?"

349
00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:09,719
Oh, your father would disagree.

350
00:16:09,803 --> 00:16:12,847
I once saw him drink an
entire gallon in one sitting.

351
00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:14,182
You did not.

352
00:16:14,265 --> 00:16:16,017
[Alfred] Did so.
And he had quite

353
00:16:16,101 --> 00:16:17,769
the swollen stomach
that evening.

354
00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:21,064
Why I had to take the Batsuit
out an entire two inches

355
00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,774
before he could even
go out on patrol.

356
00:16:42,377 --> 00:16:43,837
[sighs]

357
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:46,089
This is so unfair, Selina.

358
00:16:48,633 --> 00:16:49,509
[meows]

359
00:16:49,592 --> 00:16:51,344
You're right. I can't give up.

360
00:16:51,428 --> 00:16:54,305
I'll work even harder to
prove I'm ready to be Batman.

361
00:16:55,223 --> 00:16:56,808
And you know what that means?

362
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,769
Time for some extreme training.

363
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:00,895
[Alfred humming]

364
00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,025
[whispers] Unsupervised
extreme training.

365
00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,864
[Damian sighs dramatically]

366
00:17:10,947 --> 00:17:12,615
I don't know, Alfred.

367
00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:15,285
Do you really think
a steaming mug

368
00:17:15,368 --> 00:17:17,287
of your world-famous hot cocoa

369
00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:19,706
with extra marshmallows
could help?

370
00:17:19,789 --> 00:17:22,041
Why I'm certain of it, sir.

371
00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:24,711
Unless it's too much trouble.

372
00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:26,504
Nonsense. Coming up.

373
00:17:31,092 --> 00:17:34,179
All right, Pennyworth,
time to deliver your A-game.

374
00:17:40,769 --> 00:17:41,769
[chuckles]

375
00:17:42,479 --> 00:17:43,479
[munching]

376
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:48,318
[gasps] Aw, man!

377
00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:49,401
[whirring]

378
00:17:58,411 --> 00:18:00,079
[beeps]

379
00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:01,164
Hm.

380
00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:03,583
Hmph.

381
00:18:03,666 --> 00:18:05,418
[munching]

382
00:18:06,211 --> 00:18:07,211
[groans]

383
00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:14,051
[clinking]

384
00:18:21,226 --> 00:18:24,229
And now the piece de resistance.

385
00:18:25,230 --> 00:18:26,064
[gasps]

386
00:18:26,147 --> 00:18:29,150
Good heavens!
Out of marshmallows?

387
00:18:29,234 --> 00:18:30,485
- What?
- [meows]

388
00:18:30,568 --> 00:18:32,237
How did that happen?

389
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:33,154
[gulps]

390
00:18:33,238 --> 00:18:35,490
This is catastrophic.

391
00:18:35,573 --> 00:18:36,908
[Damian] That's okay.

392
00:18:36,991 --> 00:18:38,159
After all, it's...

393
00:18:38,243 --> 00:18:40,453
it's only cocoa
without marshmallows.

394
00:18:41,454 --> 00:18:43,581
It's not like it's Christmas Eve

395
00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:44,707
without my...

396
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:46,125
[sniffles] ...dad.

397
00:18:46,209 --> 00:18:47,460
[imitates crying]

398
00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:54,759
[continues crying]

399
00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:57,095
[clears throat] Fear not.

400
00:18:57,178 --> 00:18:59,597
I shall return before your cocoa

401
00:18:59,681 --> 00:19:01,349
even has a chance to cool.

402
00:19:03,017 --> 00:19:04,686
[Damian panting]

403
00:19:04,769 --> 00:19:06,938
[grunts] You sure?
You really don't need to,

404
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,857
but if you insist.
Hurry back. Okay, bye.

405
00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:12,694
And now, time to train

406
00:19:12,777 --> 00:19:14,445
for I am...

407
00:19:14,529 --> 00:19:16,364
the Night!

408
00:19:16,447 --> 00:19:19,033
[voice echoing] Night. Night.

409
00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:21,536
Night. Night...

410
00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:23,538
[engine whirring]

411
00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:30,461
[humming]

412
00:19:32,922 --> 00:19:34,007
Oh, biscuits!

413
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:35,174
[tires screeching]

414
00:19:37,844 --> 00:19:39,012
I beg your pardon.

415
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:42,974
Hey, watch where
you're going, grandpa!

416
00:19:43,558 --> 00:19:46,227
There's some real psychos
in this neighborhood.

417
00:19:48,813 --> 00:19:51,065
[engine whirring and backfiring]

418
00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:54,290
["Oi to the World"
by The Vandals playing]

419
00:20:05,580 --> 00:20:07,832
<i>♪ If God came down
On Christmas Day ♪</i>

420
00:20:07,916 --> 00:20:10,960
<i>♪ I know exactly
What he'd say ♪</i>

421
00:20:11,044 --> 00:20:13,546
<i>♪ He'd say "Oi!" to the punks
And "Oi!" to the skins ♪</i>

422
00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:16,382
<i>♪ But "Oi!" to the world
And everybody wins ♪</i>

423
00:20:16,466 --> 00:20:18,676
<i>♪ Haji was a bloody mess
He ran out through the crowd ♪</i>

424
00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:21,638
<i>♪ He said, "We'll meet again
We are bloody yet unbowed" ♪</i>

425
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:24,057
<i>♪ Trevor called his bluff
And told him where to meet ♪</i>

426
00:20:24,140 --> 00:20:26,893
<i>♪ Christmas Day on the roof
Down at 20 Oxford Street ♪</i>

427
00:20:26,976 --> 00:20:29,479
<i>♪ If God came down
On Christmas Day ♪</i>

428
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,856
<i>♪ I know exactly
What he'd say ♪</i>

429
00:20:31,940 --> 00:20:34,609
<i>♪ He'd say "Oi!" to the punks
And "Oi!" to the skins ♪</i>

430
00:20:34,692 --> 00:20:37,320
<i>♪ But "Oi!" to the world
And everybody wins ♪</i>

431
00:20:40,448 --> 00:20:42,700
<i>♪ If God came down
On Christmas Day ♪</i>

432
00:20:42,784 --> 00:20:45,078
<i>♪ I know exactly
What he'd say ♪</i>

433
00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:47,705
<i>♪ He'd say "Oi!" to the punks
And "Oi!" to the skins ♪</i>

434
00:20:47,789 --> 00:20:50,708
<i>♪ But "Oi!" to the world
And everybody wins ♪</i>

435
00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:51,793
[laughs]

436
00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,212
I don't need some trip
to Nova Scotia.

437
00:20:54,295 --> 00:20:57,465
This is the best
Christmas Eve ever!

438
00:20:57,548 --> 00:20:59,384
[voice echoing] Ever! Ever!

439
00:20:59,467 --> 00:21:02,387
I haven't determined the cause
of the Batjet malfunction,

440
00:21:02,470 --> 00:21:04,305
but there's no anomaly up here.

441
00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:06,307
In fact,
it's a perfectly typical

442
00:21:06,391 --> 00:21:08,351
- Nova Scotia blizzard!
- [wind howling]

443
00:21:08,434 --> 00:21:10,395
[indistinct voice over phone]

444
00:21:11,854 --> 00:21:13,773
What do you mean,
"What anomaly," J'onn?

445
00:21:13,856 --> 00:21:15,984
If you didn't send me here,
who did?

446
00:21:16,067 --> 00:21:18,444
Ugh! [groaning]

447
00:21:18,528 --> 00:21:20,530
- [crackling]
- Oh, no. Hello?

448
00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:22,865
J'onzz? Hello!

449
00:21:24,659 --> 00:21:25,659
Great.

450
00:21:26,369 --> 00:21:28,454
I can't miss Christmas.

451
00:21:29,455 --> 00:21:31,833
Damian, I'm coming!

452
00:21:31,916 --> 00:21:33,501
[wind howling]

453
00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:39,966
[crashing]

454
00:21:40,049 --> 00:21:41,551
[man and woman straining]

455
00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:44,053
Please, why are you doing this?

456
00:21:44,137 --> 00:21:46,556
Yeah. It's Christmas,
you monster.

457
00:21:47,223 --> 00:21:49,267
I'm just making
some Christmas memories.

458
00:21:49,851 --> 00:21:51,060
Say, "Cheese."

459
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:53,563
Ugh! Stop it with the videos.

460
00:21:53,646 --> 00:21:56,566
What? Is it a crime
to document our crimes.

461
00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:58,293
[Francine] Just throw
the goods in the van,

462
00:21:58,317 --> 00:21:59,527
- you idiot!
- [loud crash]

463
00:21:59,610 --> 00:22:01,279
We've got a lot
of mansions to hit.

464
00:22:02,530 --> 00:22:03,530
[timer dings]

465
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:09,120
And now, the most important
part of training,

466
00:22:09,203 --> 00:22:12,040
the post-workout carbo load.

467
00:22:13,541 --> 00:22:15,043
[gulping]

468
00:22:16,461 --> 00:22:17,712
It's good.

469
00:22:17,795 --> 00:22:21,632
But it could have a bit more
turbo charge.

470
00:22:22,592 --> 00:22:23,634
[bubbling]

471
00:22:24,677 --> 00:22:26,179
[chuckles, screams]

472
00:22:28,014 --> 00:22:29,557
[groaning]

473
00:22:31,976 --> 00:22:34,353
I survived an explosion.

474
00:22:35,021 --> 00:22:36,147
Again.

475
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:42,528
[crackling]

476
00:22:50,495 --> 00:22:53,539
[Francine] This neighborhood's
prime for the picking.

477
00:22:53,623 --> 00:22:55,343
[Terry] Which house
do you want to hit next?

478
00:22:55,541 --> 00:22:56,541
[glass shatters]

479
00:23:00,046 --> 00:23:01,380
That one will do.

480
00:23:01,464 --> 00:23:02,757
So big.

481
00:23:10,139 --> 00:23:11,432
[thudding]

482
00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:14,977
Oh, man.
Alfred's back already?

483
00:23:18,981 --> 00:23:21,275
Ah, we've hit a gold mine.

484
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:23,569
Looks like no one's home.

485
00:23:24,153 --> 00:23:26,614
Will you shut up and help me,
you ding-dong?

486
00:23:28,407 --> 00:23:29,407
Burglars!

487
00:23:30,535 --> 00:23:32,912
Oh, no. What do I do?
What do I do?

488
00:23:38,209 --> 00:23:39,085
[grunts]

489
00:23:39,168 --> 00:23:40,795
Okay, Damian, calm down.

490
00:23:40,878 --> 00:23:42,588
Think. It's just
a home invasion.

491
00:23:42,672 --> 00:23:43,965
A home invasion?

492
00:23:44,048 --> 00:23:46,592
Dad never told me what to do
in case of one of these.

493
00:23:47,677 --> 00:23:50,638
Ugh! What is this?
Bulletproof glass?

494
00:23:50,721 --> 00:23:51,907
- Here, I've got it.
- No, no, no!

495
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:53,391
- [grunts]
- [glass shatters]

496
00:23:53,474 --> 00:23:54,474
[exclaims]

497
00:23:55,977 --> 00:23:56,977
[exclaims]

498
00:23:57,687 --> 00:23:58,687
Ugh!

499
00:23:59,188 --> 00:24:01,125
- [Bruce over recording] <i>Emergency...</i>
- Not now. Come on, turn off.

500
00:24:01,149 --> 00:24:02,292
- Turn off.
<i>- My baby is in...</i>

501
00:24:02,316 --> 00:24:03,316
[panting]

502
00:24:10,616 --> 00:24:11,617
Told you I had it.

503
00:24:12,201 --> 00:24:13,286
[rousing music playing]

504
00:24:16,330 --> 00:24:17,165
[chuckles]

505
00:24:17,248 --> 00:24:20,251
Terry, I think
we hit the jackpot.

506
00:24:20,334 --> 00:24:21,419
Cha-ching.

507
00:24:22,962 --> 00:24:24,964
What have I told you
about that stupid phone?

508
00:24:25,047 --> 00:24:27,133
What? Uh-oh.

509
00:24:27,216 --> 00:24:29,385
- [punch lands]
- [Terry] Ouch! I bit my tongue.

510
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:31,053
- [meows]
- [shushes]

511
00:24:32,054 --> 00:24:33,931
Ah, there's so much stuff.

512
00:24:34,015 --> 00:24:36,559
How are we gonna fit all
this junk inside the van?

513
00:24:36,642 --> 00:24:38,769
We'll just grab what we can
and get a move on.

514
00:24:38,853 --> 00:24:40,813
The boss doesn't like
to be kept waiting.

515
00:24:40,897 --> 00:24:42,106
Yeah, that's true.

516
00:24:42,190 --> 00:24:43,900
Remember what happened
to the last bloke?

517
00:24:43,983 --> 00:24:45,276
Ugh! Don't remind me.

518
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:46,903
I can still hear his screams.

519
00:24:49,697 --> 00:24:51,866
Hang on, Selina.
I'm calling for help.

520
00:24:52,575 --> 00:24:54,493
[breathes heavily] Police.

521
00:24:56,120 --> 00:24:57,931
[operator] <i>Gotham City Police.</i>
<i>How can I help you?</i>

522
00:24:57,955 --> 00:25:00,458
[Terry chuckles]
Check out this cool belt.

523
00:25:00,541 --> 00:25:01,541
[gasps]

524
00:25:02,126 --> 00:25:04,378
[Terry] You think I could
rock something like this?

525
00:25:04,462 --> 00:25:06,797
Just throw it in the bag,
you idiot.

526
00:25:06,881 --> 00:25:07,881
Yeah, okay.

527
00:25:07,924 --> 00:25:09,383
I'm gonna try you on...

528
00:25:09,467 --> 00:25:13,262
[in slowed voice] ...later.

529
00:25:13,346 --> 00:25:15,514
[slowed voice] No!

530
00:25:22,104 --> 00:25:23,481
They can't take my belt.

531
00:25:23,564 --> 00:25:25,316
Dad already thinks
I'm not ready for it.

532
00:25:25,399 --> 00:25:27,902
It'll be years before
he trusts me with another one.

533
00:25:29,487 --> 00:25:31,447
Unless I get it back myself,

534
00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:34,200
then Dad would see that
I am ready to be a superhero.

535
00:25:34,951 --> 00:25:36,577
[operator] <i>Hello?</i>
<i>What's the emergency?</i>

536
00:25:36,661 --> 00:25:37,912
<i>Is anyone injured?</i>

537
00:25:37,995 --> 00:25:40,790
No. But they will be.

538
00:25:40,873 --> 00:25:42,433
- [operator] <i>Hello?</i>
- [call disconnects]

539
00:25:44,794 --> 00:25:46,337
- Come on, Selina.
- [meows]

540
00:25:46,420 --> 00:25:48,923
- [footsteps]
- [Francine] You hear something?

541
00:25:55,263 --> 00:25:57,265
[both laughing]

542
00:26:00,101 --> 00:26:04,146
Man, they wasted a lot of
moolah on a bunch of dumb books.

543
00:26:04,230 --> 00:26:07,733
There's a whole shelf on excavating
shale rock from underneath manors.

544
00:26:08,693 --> 00:26:10,027
That's weirdly specific.

545
00:26:11,445 --> 00:26:13,215
[Damian in deep voice]
Hasn't anyone ever told you

546
00:26:13,239 --> 00:26:14,949
to be quiet in a library?

547
00:26:22,832 --> 00:26:24,458
[grunting]

548
00:26:25,751 --> 00:26:27,628
Give me back my belt.

549
00:26:29,171 --> 00:26:31,465
Okay, you have got
to be kidding me.

550
00:26:31,549 --> 00:26:33,676
[chuckles] Now, this
I've got to get.

551
00:26:33,759 --> 00:26:35,720
Nice entrance, kid.

552
00:26:35,803 --> 00:26:37,179
What are you supposed to be?

553
00:26:37,263 --> 00:26:38,639
I'm Batman.

554
00:26:38,723 --> 00:26:41,976
And your night just got
a whole lot darker.

555
00:26:42,935 --> 00:26:45,229
All right. Come here, kid.

556
00:26:45,313 --> 00:26:47,189
[exclaims] Where did he go?

557
00:26:47,273 --> 00:26:48,273
Peek-a-boo!

558
00:26:50,318 --> 00:26:52,945
- [grunts]
- Ugh, just my luck.

559
00:26:53,029 --> 00:26:54,780
Okay, you little brat.

560
00:26:54,864 --> 00:26:56,115
You had your fun.

561
00:26:56,198 --> 00:26:58,326
Uh, I can't see anything.

562
00:26:58,409 --> 00:27:00,161
[Damian] You can even
say you're blind

563
00:27:00,244 --> 00:27:01,287
as a bat.

564
00:27:01,370 --> 00:27:03,289
- What was that?
- What's going on?

565
00:27:03,372 --> 00:27:04,372
[Damian chuckles]

566
00:27:05,541 --> 00:27:06,541
<i>Adios.</i>

567
00:27:07,293 --> 00:27:09,253
Get over here,
you little turdmuffin!

568
00:27:09,337 --> 00:27:10,921
[both groan]

569
00:27:12,423 --> 00:27:15,384
[groans] I'm gonna
tear that bat's wings off.

570
00:27:15,468 --> 00:27:16,886
Is that all you got?

571
00:27:19,263 --> 00:27:20,264
Uh-oh.

572
00:27:20,848 --> 00:27:22,933
[both screaming]

573
00:27:23,017 --> 00:27:24,185
[chuckling]

574
00:27:28,022 --> 00:27:29,482
Argh!

575
00:27:29,565 --> 00:27:31,484
- [thudding]
- [groaning]

576
00:27:31,567 --> 00:27:33,027
I'm gonna puke.

577
00:27:34,862 --> 00:27:35,862
[loud crash]

578
00:27:38,157 --> 00:27:39,992
[both groaning]

579
00:27:43,704 --> 00:27:45,498
I'm over here, bozos!

580
00:27:45,581 --> 00:27:47,833
Come and get me. [chuckles]

581
00:27:47,917 --> 00:27:50,252
I'm gonna deck the halls
with this kid.

582
00:27:50,336 --> 00:27:51,336
[both scream]

583
00:27:51,379 --> 00:27:53,089
[both groaning]

584
00:27:55,257 --> 00:27:56,467
[screaming continues]

585
00:27:59,845 --> 00:28:00,845
Ha!

586
00:28:02,264 --> 00:28:03,265
[whirring]

587
00:28:03,933 --> 00:28:05,768
[both screaming]

588
00:28:05,851 --> 00:28:07,019
[grunting]

589
00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:14,485
What the...

590
00:28:14,568 --> 00:28:15,778
A kiddy pool?

591
00:28:15,861 --> 00:28:18,322
That's to put out
the grease fire.

592
00:28:18,406 --> 00:28:20,491
Water doesn't put out
grease fires.

593
00:28:20,574 --> 00:28:21,951
Exactly.

594
00:28:26,038 --> 00:28:28,040
[Francine and Terry screaming]

595
00:28:37,466 --> 00:28:38,884
[grunts]

596
00:28:40,219 --> 00:28:41,053
[chuckles]

597
00:28:41,137 --> 00:28:43,848
[both screaming]

598
00:28:46,934 --> 00:28:48,144
[screaming]

599
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:52,731
Is that our...

600
00:28:52,815 --> 00:28:54,191
[beeping]

601
00:28:55,401 --> 00:28:57,153
[horn honking]

602
00:28:57,236 --> 00:28:58,236
[snaps, pops]

603
00:29:01,115 --> 00:29:03,200
Ugh! Congealed eel?

604
00:29:03,284 --> 00:29:04,994
That's it! I've had it!

605
00:29:05,077 --> 00:29:06,787
Grab what you can.
We're out of here.

606
00:29:08,539 --> 00:29:10,207
Load up. I'll start the van.

607
00:29:12,042 --> 00:29:14,211
- [straining]
- Let it go, kid.

608
00:29:14,295 --> 00:29:16,881
Give me back my utility belt.

609
00:29:16,964 --> 00:29:19,216
You mean my utility belt?

610
00:29:20,718 --> 00:29:22,970
[Bruce over recording]
<i>Emergency! Call for help.</i>

611
00:29:23,053 --> 00:29:24,889
<i>- My precious little baby is...</i>
- There it is.

612
00:29:24,972 --> 00:29:27,099
- [ripping]
- [both groan]

613
00:29:27,183 --> 00:29:28,476
Ugh! [gasps]

614
00:29:29,602 --> 00:29:30,686
Will you hurry up?

615
00:29:31,562 --> 00:29:32,562
[engine whirring]

616
00:29:33,439 --> 00:29:35,900
- [chuckles]
- Stop! Get back here.

617
00:29:37,651 --> 00:29:38,777
[honks]

618
00:29:39,403 --> 00:29:40,403
Later, kid.

619
00:29:41,238 --> 00:29:43,240
[Damian grunts]

620
00:29:43,324 --> 00:29:45,743
Now, you're gonna feel
my ninja skills.

621
00:29:45,826 --> 00:29:47,203
[Terry] This kid
just won't quit.

622
00:29:47,286 --> 00:29:48,454
Oh, that's no kid.

623
00:29:48,537 --> 00:29:50,289
[growling]

624
00:29:50,372 --> 00:29:52,416
That's some kind
of feral mutant.

625
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:54,376
Whoa!

626
00:29:55,252 --> 00:29:57,379
Oh, no!
The boss is gonna kill us.

627
00:29:57,463 --> 00:29:59,798
[chuckles]
Now you've got nothing.

628
00:29:59,882 --> 00:30:02,176
Oh, I wouldn't say nothing.

629
00:30:02,259 --> 00:30:04,386
Whoa! [groans]

630
00:30:05,262 --> 00:30:06,597
[Terry] I got your belt.

631
00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:08,599
You lose, kid.

632
00:30:10,851 --> 00:30:12,102
[groaning]

633
00:30:14,230 --> 00:30:15,230
[growls]

634
00:30:17,233 --> 00:30:18,233
Hm?

635
00:30:18,859 --> 00:30:20,027
Whoa!

636
00:30:21,654 --> 00:30:22,655
[wind whistles]

637
00:30:24,365 --> 00:30:28,369
My belt may be gone,
but this is far from over.

638
00:30:28,452 --> 00:30:30,454
I will have vengeance.

639
00:30:30,538 --> 00:30:32,414
Because they didn't
cross some kid.

640
00:30:33,040 --> 00:30:34,917
They crossed Batman's kid!

641
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:36,460
[thunder breaks]

642
00:30:41,966 --> 00:30:43,300
[Selina meows]

643
00:30:46,637 --> 00:30:49,306
Sorry, Selina,
but you can't come.

644
00:30:49,390 --> 00:30:51,350
This is gonna be
way too dangerous.

645
00:30:52,434 --> 00:30:54,228
Once I pass through these doors,

646
00:30:54,311 --> 00:30:56,522
the Damian you knew
will be no more.

647
00:30:56,605 --> 00:30:58,148
I know, you're scared for me.

648
00:30:58,232 --> 00:31:00,526
And honestly,
I'm a little scared, too.

649
00:31:01,235 --> 00:31:02,403
- But...
- [snoring]

650
00:31:03,862 --> 00:31:04,862
Oh.

651
00:31:06,657 --> 00:31:08,577
[whispers] Take care
of the house while I'm gone.

652
00:31:10,911 --> 00:31:12,746
[dramatic music plays]

653
00:31:24,633 --> 00:31:25,633
[panting]

654
00:31:53,621 --> 00:31:55,039
[muzak playing]

655
00:31:59,001 --> 00:32:02,504
<i>♪ O holy night
The Stars... ♪</i>

656
00:32:02,588 --> 00:32:04,048
[dramatic music playing]

657
00:32:04,882 --> 00:32:05,883
[chuckles]

658
00:32:21,940 --> 00:32:23,108
[bats screeching]

659
00:32:24,902 --> 00:32:26,195
Whoo-hoo!

660
00:32:30,449 --> 00:32:32,159
Let's see that ice cream truck

661
00:32:32,242 --> 00:32:34,787
outrun this sick set of wheels.

662
00:32:35,788 --> 00:32:37,623
[chuckling] Oh,
what do we have here?

663
00:32:46,465 --> 00:32:47,465
Huh...

664
00:32:48,425 --> 00:32:49,468
It's a bit saggy.

665
00:32:52,012 --> 00:32:54,890
Well, that one just leaves
nothing to the imagination.

666
00:33:07,611 --> 00:33:08,737
What's this?

667
00:33:10,656 --> 00:33:11,949
[gasps]

668
00:33:14,827 --> 00:33:16,412
No way.

669
00:33:26,714 --> 00:33:28,340
Dad made me a Batsuit.

670
00:33:30,175 --> 00:33:31,343
[grunting]

671
00:33:33,762 --> 00:33:34,888
Awesome.

672
00:33:38,726 --> 00:33:41,603
Whoa! Wait until
they get a load of me.

673
00:33:42,271 --> 00:33:44,523
<i>Damian. It's Dad.</i>

674
00:33:44,606 --> 00:33:45,733
Dad?

675
00:33:45,816 --> 00:33:48,902
<i>If you're wearing that suit,
it means I am dead,</i>

676
00:33:48,986 --> 00:33:50,779
<i>and my worst fear has come true.</i>

677
00:33:50,863 --> 00:33:52,281
<i>Crime is back in Gotham.</i>

678
00:33:53,115 --> 00:33:55,367
<i>And now you must take my place
and become...</i>

679
00:33:56,326 --> 00:33:57,326
<i>the Batman.</i>

680
00:33:58,120 --> 00:34:00,456
<i>Unless you broke into the
Batcave and stole the suit,</i>

681
00:34:00,539 --> 00:34:04,126
<i>in which case you're in big trouble,
mister. You just wait till I get home.</i>

682
00:34:04,209 --> 00:34:05,209
Yikes.

683
00:34:06,128 --> 00:34:09,715
<i>By now, I'd already given you the
utility belt that goes with your suit.</i>

684
00:34:09,798 --> 00:34:13,051
<i>That Batsuit is the most
technologically advanced yet.</i>

685
00:34:13,135 --> 00:34:14,303
Heck, yeah.

686
00:34:14,386 --> 00:34:16,013
<i>But before we get
into that tech,</i>

687
00:34:16,096 --> 00:34:18,158
<i>there's a few things your father
would like to share with you,</i>

688
00:34:18,182 --> 00:34:19,767
<i>in case we never got the chance.</i>

689
00:34:19,850 --> 00:34:21,185
<i>Like when I met your mom.</i>

690
00:34:21,268 --> 00:34:23,520
<i>Damian, your mother
was a total smokeshow.</i>

691
00:34:23,604 --> 00:34:26,398
[gags] How do you
fast forward this thing?

692
00:34:26,482 --> 00:34:28,525
<i>- Sugar Moose.</i>
<i>- </i>[electrical buzzing]

693
00:34:28,609 --> 00:34:29,753
<i>you might be getting to that age</i>

694
00:34:29,777 --> 00:34:32,070
<i>where your body is going
through some changes...</i>

695
00:34:32,154 --> 00:34:33,489
Ugh! Gross.

696
00:34:33,572 --> 00:34:34,740
[electrical buzzing]

697
00:34:36,617 --> 00:34:38,243
<i>You gotta be careful, Damian.</i>

698
00:34:38,327 --> 00:34:39,244
[laughs]

699
00:34:39,328 --> 00:34:42,915
<i>Oh, Alfred, the diaper's
integrity, it's been compromised.</i>

700
00:34:42,998 --> 00:34:45,501
<i>- I need wipes...</i>
- Ah, Dad.

701
00:34:45,584 --> 00:34:46,752
[electrical buzzing]

702
00:34:48,253 --> 00:34:49,963
<i>and though I'd won
the brutal fight,</i>

703
00:34:50,047 --> 00:34:53,300
<i>the searing pain of the injuries
I sustained are still with me.</i>

704
00:34:53,383 --> 00:34:54,383
<i>Every day.</i>

705
00:34:55,594 --> 00:34:57,387
<i>Okay, so, onto the Batsuit.</i>

706
00:34:57,471 --> 00:34:58,555
Yeah!

707
00:34:58,639 --> 00:35:02,726
<i>To be honest, Damian, part of me never
wanted you to have to put that suit on.</i>

708
00:35:02,810 --> 00:35:05,103
<i>But another part of me
always knew deep down</i>

709
00:35:05,187 --> 00:35:07,606
<i>that this is what
you were born to do.</i>

710
00:35:07,689 --> 00:35:11,276
<i>My only regret is not being
by your side when you did it.</i>

711
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:14,154
<i>Thankfully, that's where
the suit's tech comes in.</i>

712
00:35:14,238 --> 00:35:18,534
<i>With the help of AI, I've
programmed myself into the suit.</i>

713
00:35:18,617 --> 00:35:20,744
<i>Activating Bat-Dad.</i>

714
00:35:20,828 --> 00:35:22,496
[electrical buzzing]

715
00:35:30,921 --> 00:35:32,232
[automated voice]
<i>Upload complete.</i>

716
00:35:32,256 --> 00:35:33,382
[laughs]

717
00:35:33,465 --> 00:35:35,551
<i>Okay. Good luck, Damian.</i>

718
00:35:35,634 --> 00:35:38,637
<i>And remember,
I'll be with you always.</i>

719
00:35:39,721 --> 00:35:41,306
<i>Ending transmission.</i>

720
00:35:41,390 --> 00:35:42,390
[both] Kapow!

721
00:35:42,432 --> 00:35:44,142
<i>♪ Da-na-na-na-na-na ♪</i>

722
00:35:47,688 --> 00:35:48,688
Dad?

723
00:35:51,692 --> 00:35:53,485
[electrical buzzing]

724
00:35:53,569 --> 00:35:56,405
[Bat-Dad] Bat-Dad online.
Hello, Damian.

725
00:35:56,488 --> 00:35:59,741
Wow, you can talk? Cool.

726
00:35:59,825 --> 00:36:02,744
Uh... computer, status report.

727
00:36:02,828 --> 00:36:04,580
Please, call me Bat-Dad.

728
00:36:04,663 --> 00:36:08,500
Bio scans indicate you are
eight years and four days old.

729
00:36:08,584 --> 00:36:11,003
Recommendation,
time for night-night.

730
00:36:11,086 --> 00:36:14,256
Great. It's just as overbearing
as the real thing.

731
00:36:14,339 --> 00:36:16,592
Would you like me
to read you a story?

732
00:36:16,675 --> 00:36:18,010
No, thank you.

733
00:36:18,093 --> 00:36:22,180
My memory matrix says I would often
read H <i>appy Puppy's First Day of School.</i>

734
00:36:22,264 --> 00:36:24,099
We don't have time for this,
Bat-Dad.

735
00:36:24,182 --> 00:36:26,351
I have it downloaded
in six languages.

736
00:36:26,435 --> 00:36:28,663
[speaking Spanish] -[Damian speaks
in English] Mute, mute, mute!

737
00:36:28,687 --> 00:36:31,273
[Bat-Dad] It sounds like you'd
like to mute your dead father.

738
00:36:31,356 --> 00:36:33,191
Would you like to mute
your dead father?

739
00:36:33,275 --> 00:36:36,945
No. I mean, yes,
but my dad isn't...

740
00:36:38,113 --> 00:36:39,615
Just mute, please.

741
00:36:39,698 --> 00:36:41,700
No mute function found.

742
00:36:41,783 --> 00:36:43,035
Then why did you just offer?

743
00:36:52,252 --> 00:36:53,837
Whoa!

744
00:36:55,464 --> 00:36:57,466
Awesome.

745
00:36:57,549 --> 00:36:59,301
[Bat-Dad] I'm not
detecting a car seat.

746
00:36:59,384 --> 00:37:01,845
Safety guidelines recommend
children under ten...

747
00:37:01,929 --> 00:37:04,806
Can we just focus?
I need to get my belt back.

748
00:37:04,890 --> 00:37:06,767
[Bat-Dad] Affirmative.
The ability to focus

749
00:37:06,850 --> 00:37:09,353
is a quality every good
superhero must possess.

750
00:37:09,436 --> 00:37:10,646
Uh-huh, yep, thanks.

751
00:37:10,729 --> 00:37:13,523
But I already know the
qualities of a good superhero.

752
00:37:13,607 --> 00:37:16,068
[Bat-Dad] Excellent.
Would you care to review?

753
00:37:16,151 --> 00:37:18,612
Focus, responsibility,
sacrifice...

754
00:37:18,695 --> 00:37:20,322
Please, just stop talking.

755
00:37:20,405 --> 00:37:22,449
Now let's drive this car.

756
00:37:23,909 --> 00:37:25,494
[engine whirring]

757
00:37:36,129 --> 00:37:37,129
[engine stops]

758
00:37:37,798 --> 00:37:39,132
[engine grumbles]

759
00:37:41,176 --> 00:37:42,928
[sputtering]

760
00:37:43,929 --> 00:37:45,597
Come on, go.

761
00:37:45,681 --> 00:37:48,809
Ugh! What's wrong
with this thing?

762
00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:51,645
[system starts]

763
00:37:51,728 --> 00:37:53,105
[engine starts]

764
00:37:59,236 --> 00:38:00,236
[laughs]

765
00:38:01,989 --> 00:38:03,699
[exclaims]

766
00:38:03,782 --> 00:38:05,093
<i>♪ Really, want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

767
00:38:05,117 --> 00:38:07,035
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

768
00:38:07,119 --> 00:38:09,579
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

769
00:38:10,497 --> 00:38:11,748
[Damian] Whoo-hoo!

770
00:38:11,832 --> 00:38:14,042
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

771
00:38:14,126 --> 00:38:16,586
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

772
00:38:16,670 --> 00:38:19,089
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

773
00:38:19,172 --> 00:38:21,049
Ooh. What's this red button do?

774
00:38:21,133 --> 00:38:23,773
[Bat-Dad] That is the turbo thruster.
But I would advise against...

775
00:38:24,970 --> 00:38:26,888
This is awesome!

776
00:38:26,972 --> 00:38:29,307
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

777
00:38:29,391 --> 00:38:31,977
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

778
00:38:32,060 --> 00:38:33,895
<i>♪ Is everything
On my list, baby, hey ♪</i>

779
00:38:33,979 --> 00:38:36,481
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

780
00:38:36,565 --> 00:38:38,525
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

781
00:38:38,608 --> 00:38:41,445
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

782
00:38:41,528 --> 00:38:43,447
<i>♪ Is everything
On my list, baby, hey ♪</i>

783
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:45,449
<i>♪ Under the mistletoe
I got it made ♪</i>

784
00:38:46,158 --> 00:38:48,201
<i>♪ Red cup, cherry limeade ♪</i>

785
00:38:48,285 --> 00:38:50,287
<i>♪ So much food
It's like a buffet ♪</i>

786
00:38:50,370 --> 00:38:52,914
<i>♪ I got next
I'm the king of spades ♪</i>

787
00:38:52,998 --> 00:38:55,292
<i>♪ Little kids
Dress up real silly ♪</i>

788
00:38:56,168 --> 00:38:57,169
[blowing nose]

789
00:38:59,755 --> 00:39:02,507
Now let's find those punks
who stole my belt.

790
00:39:03,300 --> 00:39:05,594
<i>♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪</i>

791
00:39:05,677 --> 00:39:07,637
<i>♪ Is everything
On my list, baby, hey ♪</i>

792
00:39:12,684 --> 00:39:13,810
[jolly music playing]

793
00:39:18,398 --> 00:39:22,319
[laughs] Oh. This is some
swanky villain hideout.

794
00:39:22,402 --> 00:39:24,071
What do you think
is in the vats?

795
00:39:24,154 --> 00:39:26,490
Probably us.
We had one job and we blew it.

796
00:39:26,573 --> 00:39:28,909
Now we've got to meet
the boss empty handed.

797
00:39:29,743 --> 00:39:31,787
We are in so much trouble.

798
00:39:31,870 --> 00:39:34,873
Relax. We're not
completely empty handed.

799
00:39:34,956 --> 00:39:36,249
Let me do the talking.

800
00:39:36,333 --> 00:39:38,001
[laughter nearby]

801
00:39:40,378 --> 00:39:42,672
On second thoughts,
you do the talking.

802
00:39:46,676 --> 00:39:49,429
Hello, sir. You in here?

803
00:39:49,513 --> 00:39:54,101
My associate and I were just
saying what a lovely hideout you...

804
00:39:56,978 --> 00:39:59,189
have... here.

805
00:40:00,565 --> 00:40:01,584
- [horn blares]
- [both scream]

806
00:40:01,608 --> 00:40:02,608
[Joker laughs maniacally]

807
00:40:04,820 --> 00:40:10,450
Well, if it isn't my two favorite new
henchmen, Roscoe and Whatchamacallit.

808
00:40:11,326 --> 00:40:14,371
Um... she's Francine, and I'm...

809
00:40:14,454 --> 00:40:17,249
Good evening, Mr. Joker, sir.

810
00:40:17,332 --> 00:40:20,127
You two are looking
a little worse for wear.

811
00:40:20,210 --> 00:40:24,422
Hopefully that's a sign you did your
part in my a master plan for Gotham.

812
00:40:24,506 --> 00:40:28,301
Oh, how I want to make this
a very special Christmas Eve.

813
00:40:28,385 --> 00:40:30,595
Oh, yeah, we had a blast.

814
00:40:30,679 --> 00:40:32,657
You should have seen
this one bloke, he was like...

815
00:40:32,681 --> 00:40:35,600
I'm sorry if I gave
the impression I cared.

816
00:40:35,684 --> 00:40:38,562
Now then,
what do you got for me?

817
00:40:38,645 --> 00:40:42,190
Oh, what do we got?
Oh, sure, uh...

818
00:40:42,274 --> 00:40:43,914
Why don't you go ahead
and do that, Terry,

819
00:40:43,984 --> 00:40:45,294
since you're kind of
spearheading that?

820
00:40:45,318 --> 00:40:48,113
No, no, you do the honors,
Francine.

821
00:40:48,196 --> 00:40:49,573
You do it.

822
00:40:49,656 --> 00:40:51,158
It wasn't me who lost the loot.

823
00:40:51,241 --> 00:40:53,952
I wouldn't have dropped the
loot if you'd driven straight

824
00:40:54,077 --> 00:40:56,163
instead of being scared by
a two-year-old.

825
00:40:56,246 --> 00:40:57,265
He was at least four and a half.

826
00:40:57,289 --> 00:40:59,875
Just give it to me.
Gimme, gimme, gimme!

827
00:40:59,958 --> 00:41:02,210
Gimme, gimme, gimme,
gimme, gimme, gimme.

828
00:41:02,294 --> 00:41:04,713
Uh... here you go, boss.

829
00:41:08,383 --> 00:41:09,583
[Joker] What's happening here?

830
00:41:10,260 --> 00:41:11,094
Where's the rest?

831
00:41:11,178 --> 00:41:15,015
That, actually, is the rest,
Mr. Joker. Sir.

832
00:41:15,098 --> 00:41:18,143
You've been out all day
and you just bring me this?

833
00:41:18,226 --> 00:41:19,686
[sighs]

834
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,315
Of all the elves I had
do my Christmas bidding,

835
00:41:23,398 --> 00:41:26,610
I gave you two
the poshest neighborhood.

836
00:41:26,693 --> 00:41:29,029
We had more. Lots more.

837
00:41:29,112 --> 00:41:33,950
But then we ran into a number
of unforeseen, unfortunate...

838
00:41:34,034 --> 00:41:34,868
It was Batman.

839
00:41:34,951 --> 00:41:38,955
Batman? Impossible. I tricked
him into leaving Gotham.

840
00:41:39,039 --> 00:41:42,542
Oh, even after all these years
apart, he still ruins everything.

841
00:41:42,626 --> 00:41:46,463
How can he be everywhere at the same time?
All at once, all the time?

842
00:41:46,546 --> 00:41:48,423
I'm so sick
of these Batman games.

843
00:41:50,425 --> 00:41:52,636
No, it was a little Batman.

844
00:41:53,970 --> 00:41:55,347
Little Batman?

845
00:41:55,430 --> 00:41:57,432
What, did he shrink
or something? Hm?

846
00:41:57,515 --> 00:42:00,227
What Terry is trying to say is...

847
00:42:00,310 --> 00:42:02,520
So, there was this little kid
dressed up as Batman.

848
00:42:02,604 --> 00:42:05,523
He beat the crud out of us in
a surprisingly skillful manner.

849
00:42:06,691 --> 00:42:08,693
[Francine] And it was all
because of that belt.

850
00:42:09,527 --> 00:42:11,780
He went berserk for it.

851
00:42:17,702 --> 00:42:18,620
[squeals]

852
00:42:18,703 --> 00:42:19,871
So, let me get this straight.

853
00:42:19,955 --> 00:42:22,874
You're telling me you two
were beat by a child in a...

854
00:42:22,958 --> 00:42:24,876
[yells] Batman costume?

855
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:28,463
[whimpers] More like PJs
and a paper-bag mask.

856
00:42:28,546 --> 00:42:30,131
There you go. See for yourself.

857
00:42:32,217 --> 00:42:33,635
[Terry]
<i>I'm afraid of the dark.</i>

858
00:42:33,718 --> 00:42:35,720
<i>- What was that?
- What's going on?</i>

859
00:42:35,804 --> 00:42:37,138
[both scream]

860
00:42:38,974 --> 00:42:41,977
Ooh, my. Look at that
little hellion go.

861
00:42:42,060 --> 00:42:44,271
And such rad ninja skills.

862
00:42:44,354 --> 00:42:45,563
[both scream on video]

863
00:42:45,647 --> 00:42:48,900
Whoa! Was that a grease fire?
So clever.

864
00:42:48,984 --> 00:42:52,570
How do you rewind this thing?
Okay, okay, here it is.

865
00:42:52,654 --> 00:42:53,947
[laughs]

866
00:42:54,030 --> 00:42:57,242
Oh, he really fried you like
a couple of chicken fingers.

867
00:42:57,325 --> 00:43:00,036
[laughs] Okay, okay.
One more time.

868
00:43:00,120 --> 00:43:01,746
[laughing maniacally]

869
00:43:05,875 --> 00:43:08,003
This child is sensational.

870
00:43:08,086 --> 00:43:10,630
[grunts]
<i>Give me my belt.</i>

871
00:43:10,714 --> 00:43:13,216
I was only planning
to steal Christmas.

872
00:43:13,300 --> 00:43:16,469
But after watching this kid's
work, it's all so clear.

873
00:43:16,553 --> 00:43:19,014
Why would we just
steal Gotham's Christmas

874
00:43:19,097 --> 00:43:23,852
when it would be so much
more festive to destroy it?

875
00:43:23,935 --> 00:43:25,020
And who better to do it

876
00:43:25,103 --> 00:43:29,941
than a merry little Batman?

877
00:43:30,025 --> 00:43:31,025
[laughs maniacally]

878
00:43:34,154 --> 00:43:35,155
[clock chiming]

879
00:43:39,868 --> 00:43:41,411
What do you have in mind, boss?

880
00:43:42,162 --> 00:43:43,162
Are you still here?

881
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:45,915
[both scream]

882
00:43:49,085 --> 00:43:50,628
[Terry] Can I at least
have my phone?

883
00:43:56,426 --> 00:43:58,261
<i>Give me my belt.</i>

884
00:43:58,345 --> 00:43:59,512
<i>Give me my belt.</i>

885
00:43:59,596 --> 00:44:03,224
My, how the little cherub
wants his toy belt back.

886
00:44:03,308 --> 00:44:04,434
[laughs]

887
00:44:06,603 --> 00:44:08,355
[Poison Ivy] Did I miss
all the fun?

888
00:44:08,438 --> 00:44:11,566
No. In fact, thanks
to this stocking stuffer,

889
00:44:11,649 --> 00:44:13,109
the real fun is about to begin.

890
00:44:13,943 --> 00:44:16,446
[Poison Ivy] Sounds divine.

891
00:44:16,529 --> 00:44:18,031
[laughs]

892
00:44:19,157 --> 00:44:23,870
Now, if I were a kid looking
for my toy, where would I look?

893
00:44:23,953 --> 00:44:25,121
Hm.

894
00:44:25,205 --> 00:44:26,664
[gasps] Of course.

895
00:44:26,748 --> 00:44:28,166
[laughs]

896
00:44:28,249 --> 00:44:31,795
Or should I say, "Ho, ho, ho."

897
00:44:42,555 --> 00:44:45,558
Looking for those scum this way
is taking too long.

898
00:44:45,642 --> 00:44:48,353
Bat-Dad, don't you have some kind
of secret surveillance system?

899
00:44:48,436 --> 00:44:50,647
You know, one that can
tap into everyone's cell phones

900
00:44:50,730 --> 00:44:52,023
and give us eyes everywhere?

901
00:44:52,107 --> 00:44:53,817
[Bat-Dad] Aha. I'm sorry.

902
00:44:53,900 --> 00:44:56,903
That would be an egregious
violation of basic privacy.

903
00:44:56,986 --> 00:45:00,073
No one should be allowed to
have eyes and ears everywhere.

904
00:45:00,156 --> 00:45:03,701
Lucky for us,
someone already does.

905
00:45:08,581 --> 00:45:10,375
Santa Claus.

906
00:45:10,458 --> 00:45:12,919
You should get a picture.
Alfred would love that.

907
00:45:13,002 --> 00:45:16,005
No pictures, only justice.

908
00:45:18,675 --> 00:45:22,345
[Batman] Oh, man,
I'm the worst dad ever.

909
00:45:22,429 --> 00:45:25,390
And I'm not racking up
any superhero points, either.

910
00:45:25,473 --> 00:45:29,561
[scoffs] Anomaly. Come on, Bruce.
Walked right into that one.

911
00:45:29,644 --> 00:45:32,188
I mean, this is textbook
supervillain stuff.

912
00:45:32,272 --> 00:45:35,108
Step one, get Batman
out of town.

913
00:45:35,191 --> 00:45:39,237
Step two, unleash an evil plot and
threaten Gotham and all its people.

914
00:45:39,946 --> 00:45:41,531
All its people...

915
00:45:41,614 --> 00:45:46,703
Damian! Great, like that kid doesn't
find a way to find trouble on his own.

916
00:45:47,287 --> 00:45:50,457
I mean, by now he probably...

917
00:45:50,540 --> 00:45:52,101
- [sirens wailing]
- [indistinct radio chatter]

918
00:45:52,125 --> 00:45:53,877
[Damian] Dad, help me.

919
00:45:53,960 --> 00:45:55,962
Dad, I need you.

920
00:45:56,045 --> 00:45:59,007
Damian! I'll see you
in the Promised Land.

921
00:46:00,216 --> 00:46:01,551
Alfred, no...

922
00:46:02,719 --> 00:46:03,720
Ahh, no!

923
00:46:05,013 --> 00:46:06,389
Don't go there.

924
00:46:06,473 --> 00:46:08,892
Remember what your therapist
said about your brooding?

925
00:46:08,975 --> 00:46:11,644
Just focus
on the repair, Brucey.

926
00:46:12,645 --> 00:46:14,147
Let's see what we got.

927
00:46:16,191 --> 00:46:18,318
Yep, that's what I thought.

928
00:46:19,110 --> 00:46:20,153
Freeze.

929
00:46:23,031 --> 00:46:24,491
[festive Spanish song playing]

930
00:46:34,209 --> 00:46:35,710
Whoa!

931
00:46:42,675 --> 00:46:44,636
Look at all these toys.

932
00:46:49,390 --> 00:46:51,059
[laughs]

933
00:46:52,602 --> 00:46:55,396
[giggles]
Happy holidays.

934
00:47:00,401 --> 00:47:03,488
- Donut eat it all at once.
- [both laugh]

935
00:47:03,571 --> 00:47:04,948
[laughs]

936
00:47:05,031 --> 00:47:06,031
Donuts.

937
00:47:09,577 --> 00:47:13,623
Focus on the belt. I am the night.
I am the night.

938
00:47:17,168 --> 00:47:19,087
Excuse me, citizen of Gotham.

939
00:47:19,170 --> 00:47:22,549
Uh-oh. Looks like someone
got their holidays mixed up.

940
00:47:22,632 --> 00:47:24,092
It's not Halloween, silly.

941
00:47:24,175 --> 00:47:26,094
Santa Claus. Where is he?

942
00:47:26,177 --> 00:47:29,556
Why, jolly old St. Nick's up in
his North Pole workshop, of course.

943
00:47:29,639 --> 00:47:30,974
Located in our toy department.

944
00:47:33,768 --> 00:47:35,770
The escalators
are right over there.

945
00:47:36,938 --> 00:47:37,981
[gasps]

946
00:47:45,446 --> 00:47:47,115
Thank you. Merry Christmas.

947
00:47:47,824 --> 00:47:49,075
[gasps]

948
00:47:52,495 --> 00:47:55,123
It's your turn, little bat boy.

949
00:47:55,999 --> 00:47:58,084
Whoo-hoo, Santa!

950
00:47:59,919 --> 00:48:02,505
I don't have time to get into
anything on my Christmas list.

951
00:48:02,589 --> 00:48:06,259
Like a new pair of titanium
Bat-cuffs or some Bat-Cloaking gear,

952
00:48:06,342 --> 00:48:08,678
or this really cool pneumatic
Bat-Grenade launcher

953
00:48:08,761 --> 00:48:09,822
that comes with the laser scope

954
00:48:09,846 --> 00:48:11,472
and the glow-in-the-dark
Bat-symbols.

955
00:48:17,770 --> 00:48:18,688
[clears throat]

956
00:48:18,771 --> 00:48:20,523
[in deep voice]
I need information, Santa.

957
00:48:23,401 --> 00:48:24,736
Wait a minute.

958
00:48:25,528 --> 00:48:26,988
You're not Santa.

959
00:48:27,071 --> 00:48:28,071
Sure, he is.

960
00:48:30,491 --> 00:48:31,659
Hello.

961
00:48:31,743 --> 00:48:37,081
How else could he possibly know
what you really want for Christmas?

962
00:48:37,832 --> 00:48:38,958
[gasps]

963
00:48:39,042 --> 00:48:40,752
Wait. How did you...

964
00:48:40,835 --> 00:48:42,253
[laughs]

965
00:48:42,337 --> 00:48:43,630
Poison Ivy!

966
00:48:44,547 --> 00:48:48,217
And you must be... Bane.

967
00:48:48,301 --> 00:48:50,887
Come get your little belt,
Bat-Mite.

968
00:48:51,721 --> 00:48:53,348
Give me that back.

969
00:48:56,142 --> 00:48:57,143
[groans]

970
00:48:57,935 --> 00:48:58,936
[Damian grunts]

971
00:49:01,272 --> 00:49:02,940
[laughing maniacally]

972
00:49:03,024 --> 00:49:04,942
[people screaming]

973
00:49:07,236 --> 00:49:08,236
Terrific.

974
00:49:09,447 --> 00:49:12,241
[Bat-Dad] Observation. The
collateral damage you are causing

975
00:49:12,325 --> 00:49:13,242
is putting you and others...

976
00:49:13,326 --> 00:49:15,078
I can't stop now.
If I get my belt back,

977
00:49:15,161 --> 00:49:17,538
I'll prove that
I'm ready to be a superhero.

978
00:49:17,622 --> 00:49:18,915
[grunts]

979
00:49:24,962 --> 00:49:27,131
Huh. [growls]

980
00:49:31,135 --> 00:49:32,720
Works every time.

981
00:49:33,262 --> 00:49:34,262
Whoa!

982
00:49:35,890 --> 00:49:38,559
I picked something up for you
in the garden section.

983
00:49:40,395 --> 00:49:41,646
[screams]

984
00:49:43,356 --> 00:49:44,356
My foliage.

985
00:49:46,317 --> 00:49:47,568
Finally.

986
00:49:53,199 --> 00:49:54,450
[Bane grunting]

987
00:49:55,368 --> 00:49:57,995
Not yet.
Remember what Joker said.

988
00:49:58,079 --> 00:50:01,791
We have to let the little disaster
artist work his magic first.

989
00:50:03,710 --> 00:50:04,961
[Damian screams]

990
00:50:06,838 --> 00:50:07,839
[straining]

991
00:50:09,382 --> 00:50:10,508
No!

992
00:50:14,262 --> 00:50:16,013
Why... does... Santa...

993
00:50:16,097 --> 00:50:17,890
need so many... reindeer?

994
00:50:22,311 --> 00:50:24,313
[gasps, screams]

995
00:50:25,481 --> 00:50:26,566
Whoa, whoa!

996
00:50:32,655 --> 00:50:34,115
[laughs wearily]

997
00:50:34,198 --> 00:50:35,908
[grunting]

998
00:50:38,703 --> 00:50:39,763
- [all gasping]
- [man 1] What's going on?

999
00:50:39,787 --> 00:50:42,015
- [woman 1] You okay, kid?
- [woman 2] It's a freaking bat.

1000
00:50:42,039 --> 00:50:44,959
It's okay, citizens.
I... I'm a super...

1001
00:50:45,042 --> 00:50:46,252
[tree creaking]

1002
00:50:53,676 --> 00:50:54,844
Oh, no.

1003
00:50:55,803 --> 00:50:57,472
[crowd clamoring]

1004
00:51:01,309 --> 00:51:02,310
[grunts]

1005
00:51:07,231 --> 00:51:08,274
[man 2] Hey, watch it.

1006
00:51:15,948 --> 00:51:17,492
[laughing maniacally]

1007
00:51:18,117 --> 00:51:19,535
[grunts]

1008
00:51:22,872 --> 00:51:23,872
[panting]

1009
00:51:32,381 --> 00:51:35,802
Bat-Dad, bring up directions
to the Gotham Zoo.

1010
00:51:35,885 --> 00:51:36,969
<i>Moments ago,</i>

1011
00:51:37,053 --> 00:51:39,639
<i>a tiny, masked figure
single handedly perpetrated</i>

1012
00:51:39,722 --> 00:51:44,143
<i>the most odious act of yuletide
vandalism this city has ever seen.</i>

1013
00:51:44,227 --> 00:51:47,563
<i>I spoke to a concerned citizen
who had this to say.</i>

1014
00:51:48,356 --> 00:51:50,316
<i>I'm concerned.</i>

1015
00:51:50,399 --> 00:51:52,652
<i>Who was this
snack-sized scrooge?</i>

1016
00:51:52,735 --> 00:51:55,363
<i>And why did he have to
ruin it for everybody?</i>

1017
00:51:55,446 --> 00:51:57,490
<i>Those questions
remain unanswered.</i>

1018
00:51:57,573 --> 00:52:00,910
<i>But this home grown Gothamite
will only say this:</i>

1019
00:52:00,993 --> 00:52:03,663
<i>Humbug to you,
you little menace.</i>

1020
00:52:03,746 --> 00:52:07,667
<i>Wherever you are, it'll take
more than knocking down our tree</i>

1021
00:52:07,750 --> 00:52:10,002
<i>to ruin this city's
Christmas spirit.</i>

1022
00:52:10,086 --> 00:52:13,172
<i>Not mine. I love that tree.</i>
[crying]

1023
00:52:14,131 --> 00:52:17,510
What a genius.

1024
00:52:17,593 --> 00:52:18,636
[laughs]

1025
00:52:19,762 --> 00:52:22,723
He's an absolute miniature
maestro of mayhem.

1026
00:52:22,807 --> 00:52:25,852
He's exceeded
my wildest expectations,

1027
00:52:25,935 --> 00:52:29,438
and he's playing into
my plan perfectly.

1028
00:52:29,522 --> 00:52:31,190
[phone ringing]

1029
00:52:33,025 --> 00:52:34,025
Talk to me.

1030
00:52:34,068 --> 00:52:36,612
The kid's belt was delivered
to the bird as planned?

1031
00:52:36,696 --> 00:52:38,364
Fantastic.

1032
00:52:38,447 --> 00:52:42,326
I'm gonna bring a sleigh full of
Christmas chaos to his next stop.

1033
00:52:42,410 --> 00:52:43,410
[laughing]

1034
00:52:47,540 --> 00:52:48,541
But, you know...

1035
00:52:49,876 --> 00:52:54,255
I'm curious to see just how much more
damage our little dynamo could cause,

1036
00:52:54,338 --> 00:52:56,424
if properly motivated.

1037
00:52:58,134 --> 00:53:02,013
Yes, it's time
for the boy and I to tango.

1038
00:53:02,096 --> 00:53:03,764
[laughing maniacally]

1039
00:53:05,808 --> 00:53:07,143
- But...
- [muffled conversation]

1040
00:53:07,226 --> 00:53:08,644
Huh? I don't wanna waltz.

1041
00:53:08,728 --> 00:53:10,187
It's... it's an expression.

1042
00:53:10,271 --> 00:53:12,273
Never mind.
I wanna talk to the kid.

1043
00:53:15,359 --> 00:53:18,112
That does it.
I'm moving to Metropolis.

1044
00:53:28,873 --> 00:53:32,043
I know you're out here.
Show yourself.

1045
00:53:39,800 --> 00:53:40,800
Victor.

1046
00:53:41,886 --> 00:53:46,015
Tonight's forecast,
a freeze is coming.

1047
00:53:46,098 --> 00:53:48,601
[Batman] All these years,
you show up out of nowhere,

1048
00:53:48,684 --> 00:53:50,186
that's your opener?

1049
00:53:50,269 --> 00:53:54,273
What about,
"Tonight, hell freezes over?"

1050
00:53:54,357 --> 00:53:56,692
[Batman] Nope. Still lame.

1051
00:53:56,776 --> 00:53:58,945
Dang it. It sounded better
in my head.

1052
00:53:59,028 --> 00:54:00,488
Never mind that, Freeze.

1053
00:54:00,571 --> 00:54:02,114
Why was I lured out
to the middle...

1054
00:54:02,198 --> 00:54:03,699
Oh, wait, I got one.

1055
00:54:03,783 --> 00:54:06,869
Time for you to get ice-creamed.

1056
00:54:25,179 --> 00:54:26,681
[Mr. Freeze screaming]

1057
00:54:28,140 --> 00:54:31,018
Answer me! Freeze!
Why did you bring me here?

1058
00:54:31,769 --> 00:54:32,769
[Mr. Freeze] Whoa.

1059
00:54:35,189 --> 00:54:36,315
[groans]

1060
00:54:37,316 --> 00:54:38,776
Haven't you figured it out?

1061
00:54:38,859 --> 00:54:42,279
We needed to get the Bat
out of Gotham.

1062
00:54:42,363 --> 00:54:47,868
However, it appears a much
smaller Bat has taken its place.

1063
00:54:47,952 --> 00:54:49,370
- [gasps]
- [laughs]

1064
00:54:49,453 --> 00:54:50,579
[Batman] Damian!

1065
00:55:06,137 --> 00:55:08,305
We've looked everywhere.

1066
00:55:08,389 --> 00:55:11,225
There's no sign of that van
or my belt.

1067
00:55:12,018 --> 00:55:13,698
[Bat-Dad] Earlier,
you remarked on the need

1068
00:55:13,728 --> 00:55:15,855
to prove your readiness
to become a superhero.

1069
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:17,481
Prove to whom?

1070
00:55:18,691 --> 00:55:19,734
To you.

1071
00:55:19,817 --> 00:55:22,653
Uh, not you, my dad.

1072
00:55:22,737 --> 00:55:24,363
So I am not dead.

1073
00:55:24,447 --> 00:55:26,657
That is certainly welcome news.

1074
00:55:26,741 --> 00:55:28,451
Sorry I didn't tell you sooner.

1075
00:55:28,534 --> 00:55:29,618
It is not your fault.

1076
00:55:29,702 --> 00:55:32,496
My central processing
made an erroneous assumption.

1077
00:55:34,457 --> 00:55:36,250
- Observation.
- What?

1078
00:55:36,333 --> 00:55:38,711
I may only be
a simulation of your father,

1079
00:55:38,794 --> 00:55:41,255
but after an analysis
of his cognitive patterns

1080
00:55:41,338 --> 00:55:43,758
in relation to your
current goal orientation,

1081
00:55:43,841 --> 00:55:46,385
I have determined
that the two do not align.

1082
00:55:46,469 --> 00:55:48,179
Wanna break that down, Bat-Dad?

1083
00:55:48,262 --> 00:55:51,432
Getting your belt back won't
prove anything to your dad.

1084
00:55:52,850 --> 00:55:55,978
Maybe you think it won't,
but I know it will.

1085
00:55:56,062 --> 00:55:57,313
It has to.

1086
00:55:57,396 --> 00:56:00,775
Being Batman alongside my dad
is all I've ever wanted.

1087
00:56:00,858 --> 00:56:03,569
I have to show Dad
I can handle myself.

1088
00:56:03,652 --> 00:56:05,821
He worries way too much.

1089
00:56:05,905 --> 00:56:09,325
He still makes me wear floaties
in the bathtub.

1090
00:56:09,408 --> 00:56:12,161
I mean, come on.
I'm not a baby.

1091
00:56:12,244 --> 00:56:14,455
Indeed. You are not a baby.

1092
00:56:14,538 --> 00:56:17,041
You have been alive
for eight years.

1093
00:56:17,124 --> 00:56:18,751
And four days. [laughs]

1094
00:56:18,834 --> 00:56:21,420
Ha-ha-ha-ha.

1095
00:56:23,047 --> 00:56:24,215
I like this place.

1096
00:56:25,091 --> 00:56:28,886
My memory matrix recalls visiting
many times with my parents.

1097
00:56:30,471 --> 00:56:31,889
I miss doing that with them.

1098
00:56:32,890 --> 00:56:34,433
Why did they stop taking...

1099
00:56:35,476 --> 00:56:37,686
Oh, right.

1100
00:56:37,770 --> 00:56:39,605
Yes, right.

1101
00:56:47,071 --> 00:56:48,071
[hoots]

1102
00:56:50,074 --> 00:56:54,036
It must have been really hard to lose
your mom and dad when you were just a kid.

1103
00:56:55,913 --> 00:56:58,874
[Bat-Dad] Although the memories
are technically not mine,

1104
00:56:58,958 --> 00:57:00,751
it was very hard to be alone.

1105
00:57:01,627 --> 00:57:03,629
In fact, your father created me

1106
00:57:03,712 --> 00:57:08,342
in part to ensure you would never
know a loneliness like that.

1107
00:57:08,425 --> 00:57:09,885
Wow, he did?

1108
00:57:13,097 --> 00:57:15,558
Hey, Bat-Dad, observation.

1109
00:57:15,641 --> 00:57:17,143
Yes, Damian?

1110
00:57:18,227 --> 00:57:19,395
I'm glad he did.

1111
00:57:20,020 --> 00:57:21,647
I wouldn't want to be alone
right now.

1112
00:57:22,231 --> 00:57:23,732
I'm glad I am here, too.

1113
00:57:24,859 --> 00:57:26,443
You're a good friend, Bat-Dad.

1114
00:57:27,027 --> 00:57:30,072
I'd give you a big hug
if I wasn't, you know,

1115
00:57:30,156 --> 00:57:31,407
wearing you.

1116
00:57:31,490 --> 00:57:32,491
It's okay.

1117
00:57:32,575 --> 00:57:36,036
Just promise to give one to your
father when you next see him.

1118
00:57:36,954 --> 00:57:39,582
Yeah, I kind of owe him
one anyway.

1119
00:57:41,876 --> 00:57:42,876
What the...

1120
00:57:47,131 --> 00:57:48,299
Whoo-hoo!

1121
00:57:48,382 --> 00:57:49,382
[laughing]

1122
00:57:51,510 --> 00:57:53,971
[Bat-Dad] Caution.
I'm detecting thin ice.

1123
00:57:54,889 --> 00:57:55,889
[Damian screaming]

1124
00:58:07,651 --> 00:58:08,651
[grunts]

1125
00:58:11,155 --> 00:58:15,034
[Bat-Dad] My environmental assessment
system indicates this may be a trap.

1126
00:58:15,117 --> 00:58:17,578
I was thinking the same thing,
Bat-Dad.

1127
00:58:23,250 --> 00:58:25,211
- [Bat-Dad] Oswald Cobblepot.
- Oswald Cobblepot.

1128
00:58:25,294 --> 00:58:28,005
I prefer The Penguin.

1129
00:58:28,964 --> 00:58:31,300
You have my belt, Birdbrain.

1130
00:58:31,383 --> 00:58:36,138
My, my. He said you were
an obnoxious little brat.

1131
00:58:36,222 --> 00:58:37,139
Who said that?

1132
00:58:37,223 --> 00:58:38,223
[Joker laughing]

1133
00:58:40,559 --> 00:58:42,144
<i>Come now, Oswald.</i>

1134
00:58:42,228 --> 00:58:45,022
<i>I never used
those words exactly.</i>

1135
00:58:45,105 --> 00:58:46,357
Joker!

1136
00:58:46,440 --> 00:58:49,109
<i>Oh, he may be obnoxious, and
he certainly acts like a brat,</i>

1137
00:58:49,193 --> 00:58:51,487
<i>but I never called him...
What was the last one?</i>

1138
00:58:52,529 --> 00:58:53,529
<i>Oh, it'll come to me.</i>

1139
00:58:53,572 --> 00:58:55,324
What do you want, Joker?

1140
00:58:55,407 --> 00:58:58,661
<i>Oh, you know your Uncle Joker.
Always stirring the pot.</i>

1141
00:58:58,744 --> 00:59:00,454
[laughing]

1142
00:59:00,537 --> 00:59:01,622
<i>Now listen carefully.</i>

1143
00:59:01,705 --> 00:59:05,042
<i>You will never
get your belt back.</i>

1144
00:59:05,125 --> 00:59:07,044
[laughs maniacally]

1145
00:59:07,127 --> 00:59:10,297
[Bat-Dad] Caution.
Joker is a master manipulator.

1146
00:59:10,381 --> 00:59:14,134
<i>Never ever, ever, ever,
ever, ever, get it back.</i>

1147
00:59:14,718 --> 00:59:16,220
Oh, yes, I will.

1148
00:59:16,303 --> 00:59:17,888
<i>- Will not.</i>
- Will too.

1149
00:59:17,972 --> 00:59:19,473
<i>- Will not.</i>
- Will too.

1150
00:59:19,556 --> 00:59:21,534
<i>Will not infinity. And
don't say infinity plus one,</i>

1151
00:59:21,558 --> 00:59:22,619
<i>because I can do this all day.</i>

1152
00:59:22,643 --> 00:59:24,645
Six weeks is his record.

1153
00:59:24,728 --> 00:59:28,816
<i>And do you know how I can be so
sure you'll never get it back?</i>

1154
00:59:28,899 --> 00:59:32,528
<i>Because it is so clear to me,
and to everyone,</i>

1155
00:59:32,611 --> 00:59:36,865
<i>that you simply don't have what
it takes to be a superhero.</i>

1156
00:59:36,949 --> 00:59:37,992
[gasps]

1157
00:59:38,701 --> 00:59:39,952
<i>I mean, look at your belt.</i>

1158
00:59:40,035 --> 00:59:41,829
<i>It's right there,</i>

1159
00:59:41,912 --> 00:59:44,832
<i>but I bet you couldn't even
snatch it from old Penguin here.</i>

1160
00:59:44,915 --> 00:59:48,210
<i>Weak, old, pathetic,
enfeebled, incontinent...</i>

1161
00:59:48,294 --> 00:59:49,128
[The Penguin] Hey!

1162
00:59:49,211 --> 00:59:52,715
Oh, yeah?
Give me back my belt.

1163
00:59:52,798 --> 00:59:53,799
Whoa! Easy, kid.

1164
00:59:53,882 --> 00:59:55,592
You heard the clown.
I'm enfeebled.

1165
00:59:55,676 --> 00:59:58,095
<i>Now, that's proper motivation.</i>

1166
00:59:58,220 --> 00:59:59,346
<i>My work here is done.</i>

1167
00:59:59,430 --> 01:00:01,181
This plan better work.

1168
01:00:01,265 --> 01:00:02,599
All right, pipsqueak.

1169
01:00:02,683 --> 01:00:04,101
Come and get it.

1170
01:00:05,227 --> 01:00:06,562
[The Penguin laughs]

1171
01:00:06,645 --> 01:00:07,645
[both grunting]

1172
01:00:11,442 --> 01:00:12,609
[grunting]

1173
01:00:13,360 --> 01:00:14,653
Yeah!

1174
01:00:19,199 --> 01:00:20,199
[straining]

1175
01:00:22,244 --> 01:00:23,524
- [The Penguin grunts]
- [groans]

1176
01:00:24,246 --> 01:00:25,789
[laughs]

1177
01:00:26,957 --> 01:00:28,542
[groaning]

1178
01:00:31,253 --> 01:00:33,130
[Bat-Dad groans] Warning.

1179
01:00:33,213 --> 01:00:35,549
Core processing unit damaged.

1180
01:00:35,632 --> 01:00:37,968
So long, Bat-Brat. [laughs]

1181
01:00:40,387 --> 01:00:42,389
[festive music playing]

1182
01:00:45,893 --> 01:00:48,395
Merry Christmas, Gotham.

1183
01:00:49,271 --> 01:00:50,314
[crowd gasps]

1184
01:00:50,397 --> 01:00:51,565
[laughs]

1185
01:00:51,648 --> 01:00:53,233
Now, look at that.

1186
01:00:53,317 --> 01:00:54,735
My ride's here.

1187
01:00:54,818 --> 01:00:56,987
Toodle-oo. [laughs]

1188
01:00:57,071 --> 01:00:59,239
This ends now.

1189
01:00:59,323 --> 01:01:01,825
[Bat-Dad] Warning.
The damage I sustained

1190
01:01:01,909 --> 01:01:03,911
has compromised
the suit's integrity.

1191
01:01:03,994 --> 01:01:07,831
Adjusting to compression at this altitude
will bring power below critical level.

1192
01:01:07,915 --> 01:01:09,416
[Damian] Hang on.
We're almost there.

1193
01:01:10,959 --> 01:01:12,669
Got room for one more?

1194
01:01:12,753 --> 01:01:14,880
Huh? For such a little kid,

1195
01:01:14,963 --> 01:01:17,383
you sure are a pain in the neck.

1196
01:01:17,466 --> 01:01:19,593
- [The Penguin laughs]
- [Damian] Whoa.

1197
01:01:19,676 --> 01:01:21,345
Whoa, whoa.

1198
01:01:21,428 --> 01:01:23,180
[screaming]

1199
01:01:23,263 --> 01:01:24,681
[The Penguin] 23 skidoo.

1200
01:01:25,307 --> 01:01:27,184
I bid you adieu.

1201
01:01:27,267 --> 01:01:28,268
[grunts]

1202
01:01:28,352 --> 01:01:31,105
[Damian grunting]

1203
01:01:35,359 --> 01:01:38,237
What? He's a freak
of nature.

1204
01:01:46,787 --> 01:01:47,830
[crowd screaming]

1205
01:01:54,128 --> 01:01:55,629
[Damian] Whoa!

1206
01:01:56,505 --> 01:01:58,632
[Bat-Dad] Warning. Power
levels below critical.

1207
01:02:02,177 --> 01:02:03,178
[laughs]

1208
01:02:04,221 --> 01:02:05,222
[yells]

1209
01:02:05,305 --> 01:02:06,723
[both grunting]

1210
01:02:06,807 --> 01:02:09,226
Let go, kid.
You'll kill us both.

1211
01:02:09,309 --> 01:02:10,727
Give it to me! Give it to me!

1212
01:02:10,811 --> 01:02:11,728
Give it to me!

1213
01:02:11,812 --> 01:02:14,857
Fine. Take it.
I hope it was worth it.

1214
01:02:15,399 --> 01:02:17,067
- [The Penguin laughs]
- [Damian screams]

1215
01:02:20,904 --> 01:02:23,073
No! [gasps]

1216
01:02:23,991 --> 01:02:25,909
What do I do? What do I do?

1217
01:02:25,993 --> 01:02:28,370
[Bat-Dad] Solution.
Diverting remaining power

1218
01:02:28,454 --> 01:02:30,497
to my inflation systems
will break your fall.

1219
01:02:30,581 --> 01:02:32,082
But what will happen to you?

1220
01:02:32,916 --> 01:02:34,042
I am sorry, Damian.

1221
01:02:34,835 --> 01:02:36,253
I will not survive.

1222
01:02:36,336 --> 01:02:37,754
No, you can't.

1223
01:02:37,838 --> 01:02:39,423
I'm sorry.
I should have listened.

1224
01:02:39,506 --> 01:02:40,841
You were right
about The Penguin.

1225
01:02:40,924 --> 01:02:42,050
About everything.

1226
01:02:42,134 --> 01:02:43,844
Please, no!

1227
01:02:43,927 --> 01:02:45,429
It's okay, Damian.

1228
01:02:45,512 --> 01:02:50,267
Remember, an important quality
every good hero must possess

1229
01:02:50,350 --> 01:02:52,352
is the willingness
to make sacrifice.

1230
01:02:52,436 --> 01:02:54,605
Bat-Dad, no!

1231
01:02:54,688 --> 01:02:55,856
Bye, Damian.

1232
01:02:55,939 --> 01:02:59,193
Initiating emergency
inflation protocol

1233
01:02:59,276 --> 01:03:00,944
in three, two...

1234
01:03:01,028 --> 01:03:02,112
[Damian grunts]

1235
01:03:06,325 --> 01:03:07,784
[groaning]

1236
01:03:09,411 --> 01:03:10,537
Bat-Dad!

1237
01:03:10,621 --> 01:03:14,041
Damian, you will make
a great hero one day.

1238
01:03:14,124 --> 01:03:15,250
[sniffles]

1239
01:03:15,334 --> 01:03:17,544
Don't leave me.

1240
01:03:17,628 --> 01:03:20,881
[Bat-Dad] Before shut down.
I just want to thank you.

1241
01:03:21,924 --> 01:03:23,133
For what?

1242
01:03:23,217 --> 01:03:25,928
Giving me warm memories
of my own.

1243
01:03:26,011 --> 01:03:27,012
[powering down]

1244
01:03:30,307 --> 01:03:31,892
[somber music playing]

1245
01:03:31,975 --> 01:03:33,393
Bat-Dad.

1246
01:03:33,477 --> 01:03:35,062
[crowd screaming]

1247
01:03:35,145 --> 01:03:36,855
[Gordon]
<i>♪ Deck the halls with... ♪</i>

1248
01:03:36,939 --> 01:03:38,148
Commissioner Gordon,

1249
01:03:38,232 --> 01:03:40,067
there's reports of mass
destruction downtown

1250
01:03:40,150 --> 01:03:42,152
and a crime wave
all across the city.

1251
01:03:42,236 --> 01:03:43,570
Calm down.

1252
01:03:43,654 --> 01:03:46,323
I've faced situations
more dire than this before.

1253
01:03:47,574 --> 01:03:49,454
- [suspenseful music playing]
- [sirens wailing]

1254
01:03:53,830 --> 01:03:55,040
I'll handle it.

1255
01:04:02,130 --> 01:04:05,509
<i>♪ I'm so glad
We have the Bat-Signal ♪</i>

1256
01:04:05,592 --> 01:04:06,885
<i>♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪</i>

1257
01:04:07,928 --> 01:04:09,137
[grunts]

1258
01:04:09,888 --> 01:04:11,348
[gasps]

1259
01:04:12,099 --> 01:04:13,684
[woman gasps]
The Bat-Signal.

1260
01:04:13,767 --> 01:04:15,207
They haven't turned
that on in years.

1261
01:04:15,269 --> 01:04:16,770
Crime is back in Gotham.

1262
01:04:16,853 --> 01:04:18,230
Run for your lives, everyone.

1263
01:04:18,313 --> 01:04:19,606
[man] We gotta get out of here.

1264
01:04:20,107 --> 01:04:21,692
Save yourselves.

1265
01:04:22,526 --> 01:04:24,069
Christmas is ruined!

1266
01:04:25,195 --> 01:04:26,446
Wait! Wait!

1267
01:04:30,033 --> 01:04:31,785
Oh, biscuits.

1268
01:04:32,494 --> 01:04:33,370
[gasps]

1269
01:04:33,453 --> 01:04:34,705
Kid, you gotta get out of here.

1270
01:04:34,788 --> 01:04:36,123
Nothing is safe anymore.

1271
01:04:37,207 --> 01:04:38,292
- [grunts]
- [man] Hey!

1272
01:04:38,375 --> 01:04:39,543
[Damian] Wait, wait, no!

1273
01:04:40,502 --> 01:04:42,421
- [groans]
- [horn honks]

1274
01:04:42,504 --> 01:04:43,922
- [gasps]
- [tires screeching]

1275
01:04:45,549 --> 01:04:47,426
- [crowd screaming]
- [gasping]

1276
01:04:48,760 --> 01:04:49,928
Santa.

1277
01:04:50,012 --> 01:04:51,930
Oh, am I glad to see you.

1278
01:04:52,014 --> 01:04:55,642
Hey, that's the kid
who wrecked the parade.

1279
01:04:55,726 --> 01:04:57,269
Way to go, jerk.

1280
01:04:57,352 --> 01:04:59,187
You ruined Christmas.

1281
01:04:59,271 --> 01:05:00,689
Wait, I can explain.

1282
01:05:00,772 --> 01:05:03,525
I just wanted to be a superhero.

1283
01:05:03,609 --> 01:05:06,111
- [man 1] Get back here.
- [man 2] He's gonna pay.

1284
01:05:06,903 --> 01:05:08,983
- [man 1] Where did he go?
- [man 2] Did you see him?

1285
01:05:17,205 --> 01:05:19,207
[whimpering]

1286
01:05:23,962 --> 01:05:25,922
Dad... [sniffles]

1287
01:05:26,006 --> 01:05:27,382
I wish you were here.

1288
01:05:29,176 --> 01:05:30,510
[distant whistling]

1289
01:05:35,891 --> 01:05:36,892
[gasps]

1290
01:05:43,231 --> 01:05:44,316
[gasps]

1291
01:05:48,070 --> 01:05:49,154
[panting]

1292
01:05:52,324 --> 01:05:53,324
[squeaking]

1293
01:05:58,914 --> 01:05:59,914
[whimpers]

1294
01:06:01,917 --> 01:06:02,959
[whimpers]

1295
01:06:04,336 --> 01:06:05,337
[bottles clinking]

1296
01:06:17,766 --> 01:06:19,101
[whimpers]

1297
01:06:25,941 --> 01:06:27,567
[straining]

1298
01:06:31,697 --> 01:06:32,697
[gasps]

1299
01:06:35,033 --> 01:06:36,201
[whimpering]

1300
01:06:37,077 --> 01:06:39,454
I'm just a kid. Don't hurt me.
I'm just a kid.

1301
01:06:44,418 --> 01:06:46,712
Alfred, what are you doing here?

1302
01:06:49,548 --> 01:06:50,548
Did you forget?

1303
01:06:51,091 --> 01:06:55,470
Your steaming mug of my world-famous
hot cocoa with extra marshmallows.

1304
01:06:55,554 --> 01:06:59,933
Of course, that is, unless
you think cocoa is kid stuff.

1305
01:07:00,016 --> 01:07:01,017
[gulping]

1306
01:07:03,019 --> 01:07:05,105
- Ah, there now, better?
- [exhales]

1307
01:07:05,188 --> 01:07:07,190
[siren wailing in distance]

1308
01:07:09,526 --> 01:07:11,528
[somber music playing]

1309
01:07:17,200 --> 01:07:19,119
I'm in deep trouble, aren't I?

1310
01:07:19,202 --> 01:07:22,456
Oh, yes, most definitely,
Master Wayne.

1311
01:07:22,539 --> 01:07:24,291
Yeah. I figured.

1312
01:07:28,920 --> 01:07:31,173
I just wanted
to be Batman so bad.

1313
01:07:31,840 --> 01:07:34,760
Maybe if Dad didn't treat me
like such baby...

1314
01:07:34,843 --> 01:07:36,970
Don't be so hard on your father.

1315
01:07:37,053 --> 01:07:38,680
He can overdo it sometimes,

1316
01:07:38,764 --> 01:07:41,391
but that's because he's trying
to protect the one thing

1317
01:07:41,475 --> 01:07:43,268
you have that he never did.

1318
01:07:43,977 --> 01:07:45,395
A childhood.

1319
01:07:47,272 --> 01:07:49,941
[sighs] I'm no superhero.

1320
01:07:50,817 --> 01:07:53,779
I lost my belt.
I destroyed my Batsuit.

1321
01:07:53,862 --> 01:07:55,739
I have no idea
where I parked the bike.

1322
01:07:56,948 --> 01:07:58,784
I can't blame anyone but me.

1323
01:07:58,867 --> 01:08:02,037
Son, costumes and belts
aren't what make a superhero...

1324
01:08:02,120 --> 01:08:04,581
I'm sorry. Did you say
you misplaced the Batpod?

1325
01:08:05,874 --> 01:08:08,084
Um, never mind.

1326
01:08:08,710 --> 01:08:10,796
Damian, becoming Batman

1327
01:08:10,879 --> 01:08:14,257
takes precisely what your father
has been attempting to teach you.

1328
01:08:14,341 --> 01:08:18,094
Focus, responsibility,
sacrifice.

1329
01:08:18,178 --> 01:08:20,639
[sniffles] Don't forget
high pain threshold.

1330
01:08:20,722 --> 01:08:22,808
[chuckles] Indeed.

1331
01:08:23,517 --> 01:08:26,520
And while you may not be
a superhero yet, little one,

1332
01:08:26,603 --> 01:08:29,981
in my heart,
I know one day you will be.

1333
01:08:30,857 --> 01:08:31,857
Thanks, Alfred.

1334
01:08:32,359 --> 01:08:33,568
But of course, my boy.

1335
01:08:34,152 --> 01:08:35,695
Now, come along.

1336
01:08:35,779 --> 01:08:38,907
I'd say we had enough excitement
for one Christmas Eve.

1337
01:08:38,990 --> 01:08:40,070
[suspenseful music playing]

1338
01:08:44,329 --> 01:08:45,747
[wind blowing]

1339
01:09:06,434 --> 01:09:08,270
"Dear Little Batman,

1340
01:09:08,353 --> 01:09:11,690
you gave me the best
Christmas gift ever.

1341
01:09:11,773 --> 01:09:14,192
Let me return the favor"?

1342
01:09:14,276 --> 01:09:15,360
[gas hissing]

1343
01:09:16,278 --> 01:09:18,280
[Damian mumbling woozily]

1344
01:09:23,493 --> 01:09:25,036
[continues mumbling]

1345
01:09:27,497 --> 01:09:30,208
Alfred? Alfred!

1346
01:09:31,793 --> 01:09:33,211
Where am I?

1347
01:09:33,295 --> 01:09:34,462
[tense music playing]

1348
01:09:38,884 --> 01:09:39,718
[balloon pops]

1349
01:09:39,801 --> 01:09:41,553
[goop bubbling]

1350
01:09:41,636 --> 01:09:42,721
Joker.

1351
01:09:44,097 --> 01:09:46,141
[Joker] <i>♪ Jingle
Bells Batman smells ♪</i>

1352
01:09:46,224 --> 01:09:48,101
♪ <i>Robin laid an egg ♪</i>

1353
01:09:48,184 --> 01:09:50,270
<i>♪ The Batmobile
Lost its wheel ♪</i>

1354
01:09:50,353 --> 01:09:52,564
<i>♪ And the Joker got away ♪</i>

1355
01:09:52,647 --> 01:09:54,524
[laughing mischievously]

1356
01:10:07,454 --> 01:10:09,748
- Snow?
- [Joker laughs]

1357
01:10:11,458 --> 01:10:12,459
[door thuds]

1358
01:10:14,210 --> 01:10:15,962
- Whoa, whoa!
- [rumbling]

1359
01:10:16,046 --> 01:10:17,339
What the...

1360
01:10:17,422 --> 01:10:18,673
[rumbling continues]

1361
01:10:20,091 --> 01:10:21,217
[gas hissing]

1362
01:10:37,776 --> 01:10:39,069
[metal clanks]

1363
01:10:42,238 --> 01:10:44,240
["Sweet Gingerbread Man"
playing over speakers]

1364
01:10:46,368 --> 01:10:50,038
<i>♪ Fresh out of the pan
Sweet gingerbread man ♪</i>

1365
01:10:52,248 --> 01:10:55,377
<i>♪ I'm twirling a cane
Made of peppermint ♪</i>

1366
01:10:56,127 --> 01:10:57,127
<i>♪ Uh-huh ♪</i>

1367
01:10:57,879 --> 01:10:58,879
<i>♪ Uh-huh ♪</i>

1368
01:10:59,756 --> 01:11:00,674
<i>♪ Nice sticky hands... ♪</i>

1369
01:11:00,757 --> 01:11:02,050
[both laughing]

1370
01:11:02,133 --> 01:11:05,095
Oh, he's here.
Don't just stand there.

1371
01:11:05,178 --> 01:11:06,763
It's nearly Christmas morning.

1372
01:11:06,846 --> 01:11:08,640
Come in, come in.

1373
01:11:10,100 --> 01:11:11,100
[objects clattering]

1374
01:11:12,644 --> 01:11:13,704
- [party horn toots]
- You made it.

1375
01:11:13,728 --> 01:11:15,063
[all laughing]

1376
01:11:15,897 --> 01:11:18,566
I am so sorry
the invite was so last minute.

1377
01:11:18,650 --> 01:11:20,735
What is this?

1378
01:11:20,819 --> 01:11:22,862
Uh, hello? Look around.

1379
01:11:22,946 --> 01:11:25,073
It's a Christmas party.

1380
01:11:25,699 --> 01:11:28,576
I don't know what you're up to,
but I'm taking you all in.

1381
01:11:28,660 --> 01:11:31,663
Oh, please. Still trying
the hero thing, are we?

1382
01:11:31,746 --> 01:11:34,457
Did we learn nothing
from tonight, young man?

1383
01:11:34,541 --> 01:11:35,458
Some people...

1384
01:11:35,542 --> 01:11:36,376
[coughs] ...you,

1385
01:11:36,459 --> 01:11:39,129
just aren't cut out
to be heroes.

1386
01:11:39,212 --> 01:11:40,880
Now, come enjoy the party.

1387
01:11:40,964 --> 01:11:45,093
Tonight, my boy, we're celebrating
something very special.

1388
01:11:45,176 --> 01:11:48,805
Crime's triumphant return
to Gotham.

1389
01:11:48,888 --> 01:11:50,265
And what better way to do it

1390
01:11:50,348 --> 01:11:53,685
than by stealing its Christmas.

1391
01:11:53,768 --> 01:11:55,562
[laughing evilly]

1392
01:11:56,730 --> 01:11:58,370
This is where you say,
"Joker, you're mad.

1393
01:11:58,398 --> 01:12:00,150
Steal Christmas? But why?"

1394
01:12:01,609 --> 01:12:02,795
[in stoic voice]
Joker, you're mad.

1395
01:12:02,819 --> 01:12:04,070
Steal Christmas? But why?

1396
01:12:04,154 --> 01:12:06,197
It all goes back
to those glory days,

1397
01:12:06,281 --> 01:12:09,075
when my friends
and I would terrorize Gotham.

1398
01:12:09,159 --> 01:12:10,452
[bell ringing]

1399
01:12:11,619 --> 01:12:13,747
[guard] Hey, get back here!
After them!

1400
01:12:15,790 --> 01:12:18,043
You'll get yours
in the end, Joker.

1401
01:12:18,126 --> 01:12:20,628
- [all laughing]
- [Joker] <i>Oh, how we'd laugh,</i>

1402
01:12:20,712 --> 01:12:22,380
and laugh and laugh.

1403
01:12:25,467 --> 01:12:26,926
But then crime went away.

1404
01:12:27,677 --> 01:12:30,555
We were forced to... retire.

1405
01:12:30,638 --> 01:12:32,766
And as a result... [sniffles]

1406
01:12:32,849 --> 01:12:34,809
We drifted apart.

1407
01:12:35,769 --> 01:12:37,353
[Vicki]
<i>Gotham City just voted</i>

1408
01:12:37,437 --> 01:12:39,773
<i>the safest place
on planet Earth.</i>

1409
01:12:39,856 --> 01:12:41,858
[people cheering]

1410
01:12:42,525 --> 01:12:45,195
[Joker] <i>Now, I always thought the
joy came from committing crime.</i>

1411
01:12:45,945 --> 01:12:50,867
Looking back, it was about
committing crime together.

1412
01:12:50,950 --> 01:12:51,868
[all laughing]

1413
01:12:51,951 --> 01:12:53,870
Aw, you big softie.

1414
01:12:53,953 --> 01:12:55,056
[in normal voice]
I don't understand.

1415
01:12:55,080 --> 01:12:57,248
What does any of this
have to do with me?

1416
01:12:57,332 --> 01:13:00,293
The moment I saw
the sheer mayhem

1417
01:13:00,376 --> 01:13:02,879
you were capable of,
I realized that with your help,

1418
01:13:02,962 --> 01:13:04,631
we could kick
this whole groovy caper

1419
01:13:04,714 --> 01:13:06,341
up a notch and a half.

1420
01:13:06,424 --> 01:13:09,094
- High five!
- I'd never help you.

1421
01:13:09,177 --> 01:13:10,345
But you already did.

1422
01:13:11,012 --> 01:13:13,848
Your chaotic bat-boobery
was a perfect distraction!

1423
01:13:13,932 --> 01:13:15,266
[blades whirring]

1424
01:13:15,350 --> 01:13:17,018
[Joker] <i>While all eyes</i>
<i>were on you,</i>

1425
01:13:17,102 --> 01:13:18,394
<i>we nabbed Christmas</i>

1426
01:13:18,478 --> 01:13:21,106
<i>- from every home in Gotham.</i>
- [tires screeching]

1427
01:13:21,189 --> 01:13:22,607
- [Bane laughing]
- [woman groaning]

1428
01:13:23,358 --> 01:13:25,026
[Poison Ivy laughs] Oh!

1429
01:13:25,652 --> 01:13:27,320
[The Penguin cackles]

1430
01:13:27,403 --> 01:13:28,822
[Poison Ivy laughs]

1431
01:13:28,905 --> 01:13:30,115
[Bane chuckles]

1432
01:13:33,368 --> 01:13:34,368
[penguin squawking]

1433
01:13:37,080 --> 01:13:39,249
[penguins squawking]

1434
01:13:40,041 --> 01:13:42,085
[Joker] <i>We set out</i>
<i>to only steal Christmas,</i>

1435
01:13:42,168 --> 01:13:43,628
<i>but you... </i>[giggles]

1436
01:13:43,711 --> 01:13:45,547
<i>You destroyed it.</i>

1437
01:13:47,382 --> 01:13:49,425
- [church bell tolling]
<i>- And now, thanks to you,</i>

1438
01:13:49,509 --> 01:13:52,971
<i>everyone is waking up
to no Christmas.</i>

1439
01:13:56,432 --> 01:13:59,102
I was just trying
to get my belt back.

1440
01:13:59,811 --> 01:14:02,897
And in the process of this
frankly, selfish pursuit,

1441
01:14:02,981 --> 01:14:05,608
you destroyed half the city.

1442
01:14:05,692 --> 01:14:08,695
Now that doesn't sound
much like a superhero to me.

1443
01:14:09,195 --> 01:14:11,614
In fact, it sounds more
like a super...

1444
01:14:12,907 --> 01:14:14,367
villain.

1445
01:14:14,450 --> 01:14:16,369
What? No. No, I'm not a...

1446
01:14:16,452 --> 01:14:17,495
Sure, you are.

1447
01:14:17,579 --> 01:14:19,622
Why do you think
I brought you here?

1448
01:14:19,706 --> 01:14:22,041
You're one of us, kid.

1449
01:14:22,125 --> 01:14:23,543
[Bane grunting]

1450
01:14:23,626 --> 01:14:25,712
We couldn't have
done it without you.

1451
01:14:25,795 --> 01:14:28,840
Yes. Thank you, from the
bottom of our cold hearts.

1452
01:14:28,923 --> 01:14:31,467
[Joker] Thank you, indeed.

1453
01:14:31,551 --> 01:14:33,553
[all laughing]

1454
01:14:35,013 --> 01:14:36,139
I can't believe...

1455
01:14:37,265 --> 01:14:38,308
You're right.

1456
01:14:39,392 --> 01:14:42,145
Only a supervillain would
ruin Christmas.

1457
01:14:42,228 --> 01:14:43,228
[sniffling]

1458
01:14:43,813 --> 01:14:44,981
That's right.

1459
01:14:45,064 --> 01:14:46,858
To thank you
for your contribution,

1460
01:14:46,941 --> 01:14:51,154
we thought it'd be real swell if we
all chipped in and got you something.

1461
01:14:56,075 --> 01:14:58,328
My utility belt.

1462
01:14:58,411 --> 01:15:00,914
Your upgraded utility belt.

1463
01:15:00,997 --> 01:15:03,291
We replaced
all the useless safety gear

1464
01:15:03,374 --> 01:15:05,543
with more practical devices.

1465
01:15:05,627 --> 01:15:07,629
[Bane grunting]

1466
01:15:09,923 --> 01:15:11,299
Well said, Bane.

1467
01:15:11,883 --> 01:15:15,678
It's the perfect accessory
for supervillains.

1468
01:15:16,763 --> 01:15:19,182
Think of all you went through
to get that belt.

1469
01:15:19,849 --> 01:15:21,643
You earned it.

1470
01:15:22,352 --> 01:15:23,352
Take it.

1471
01:15:24,062 --> 01:15:26,981
[all chanting] Take the belt!

1472
01:15:27,065 --> 01:15:30,693
Take the belt! Take the belt!

1473
01:15:30,777 --> 01:15:32,195
Take the belt!

1474
01:15:32,278 --> 01:15:33,363
[chanting fades]

1475
01:15:36,157 --> 01:15:40,870
[Bruce] <i>You must take my place</i>
<i>and become... the Batman.</i>

1476
01:15:42,664 --> 01:15:45,250
[Alfred] <i>Becoming Batman takes</i>
<i>precisely what your father</i>

1477
01:15:45,333 --> 01:15:46,960
<i>has been attempting
to teach you.</i>

1478
01:15:50,380 --> 01:15:51,464
[Bruce] <i>Give me the belt.</i>

1479
01:15:51,547 --> 01:15:53,341
<i>You're clearly not ready for it.</i>

1480
01:16:00,139 --> 01:16:01,557
There now.

1481
01:16:01,641 --> 01:16:05,144
Doesn't it feel good
to get what you want?

1482
01:16:07,689 --> 01:16:09,524
I guess you're right, Joker.

1483
01:16:09,607 --> 01:16:11,025
I'm no superhero.

1484
01:16:12,527 --> 01:16:15,488
But then again, I'm not
a supervillain, either.

1485
01:16:16,823 --> 01:16:20,159
See, Joker,
being a superhero takes focus,

1486
01:16:21,035 --> 01:16:22,495
responsibility...

1487
01:16:26,416 --> 01:16:27,875
and sacrifice.

1488
01:16:28,584 --> 01:16:29,984
- [fire crackling]
- [Damian grunts]

1489
01:16:31,796 --> 01:16:32,796
[all shrieking]

1490
01:16:35,300 --> 01:16:36,718
[whooshing]

1491
01:16:38,261 --> 01:16:39,345
[clanks]

1492
01:16:39,429 --> 01:16:41,055
Holy crap!

1493
01:16:41,764 --> 01:16:44,517
All right. Which one of you
gave a little kid explosives?

1494
01:16:46,602 --> 01:16:48,521
It did seem like
a good idea at the time.

1495
01:16:55,903 --> 01:16:56,903
That's not good.

1496
01:17:05,079 --> 01:17:07,582
My snow globe! You broke it.

1497
01:17:07,665 --> 01:17:09,751
Now I'm gonna break you.

1498
01:17:09,834 --> 01:17:12,045
You got it backwards,
clown face.

1499
01:17:12,128 --> 01:17:15,214
I'm taking you down, all of you.

1500
01:17:15,298 --> 01:17:18,718
And I'm taking these presents
back to the kids of Gotham.

1501
01:17:18,801 --> 01:17:21,262
I'm saving Christmas!

1502
01:17:21,346 --> 01:17:24,390
You ungrateful, little twerp.

1503
01:17:24,474 --> 01:17:27,143
I'm gonna chop you up
like sardines.

1504
01:17:28,102 --> 01:17:29,395
[Damian grunting]

1505
01:17:31,356 --> 01:17:32,732
[grunts]

1506
01:17:33,941 --> 01:17:34,941
[laughs]

1507
01:17:37,403 --> 01:17:38,946
- Hiyah!
- [Bane groans]

1508
01:17:40,031 --> 01:17:41,657
- Play ball!
- [Damian yells]

1509
01:17:43,201 --> 01:17:44,201
[groans]

1510
01:17:44,243 --> 01:17:45,995
[groaning]

1511
01:17:46,079 --> 01:17:46,996
[panting]

1512
01:17:47,080 --> 01:17:48,831
- [grunts]
- Crush him, Bane.

1513
01:17:48,915 --> 01:17:49,915
[Bane growling]

1514
01:17:55,004 --> 01:17:56,004
[Damian yells]

1515
01:17:57,090 --> 01:17:58,090
[yelling]

1516
01:18:01,886 --> 01:18:02,887
[Damian grunts]

1517
01:18:07,183 --> 01:18:10,353
All you had to do
was take the belt,

1518
01:18:10,436 --> 01:18:13,064
and now I'm gonna
take your head.

1519
01:18:13,648 --> 01:18:14,648
[card clangs]

1520
01:18:18,569 --> 01:18:19,569
[thuds]

1521
01:18:25,576 --> 01:18:29,664
Looks like you're in a little
trouble, Little Batman.

1522
01:18:29,747 --> 01:18:31,475
- [The Penguin laughing]
- [Poison Ivy chuckles]

1523
01:18:31,499 --> 01:18:32,667
[all laughing]

1524
01:18:34,335 --> 01:18:35,503
[Damian grunts]

1525
01:18:35,586 --> 01:18:36,980
- [grunting]
- [The Penguin cackling]

1526
01:18:37,004 --> 01:18:40,174
No one poops
on my party and lives.

1527
01:18:40,258 --> 01:18:41,426
[all laughing]

1528
01:18:41,509 --> 01:18:42,760
Yes.

1529
01:18:44,137 --> 01:18:45,555
- [whooshing]
- What was that?

1530
01:18:48,558 --> 01:18:49,976
[whooshing]

1531
01:18:52,311 --> 01:18:53,311
[loud thud]

1532
01:18:53,980 --> 01:18:55,815
[Mr. Freeze mumbling]

1533
01:18:57,900 --> 01:18:59,110
[dramatic music playing]

1534
01:19:01,654 --> 01:19:02,654
[The Penguin gasps]

1535
01:19:04,407 --> 01:19:05,407
Dad!

1536
01:19:06,117 --> 01:19:07,994
[gasps] Thank goodness,
I found you.

1537
01:19:08,077 --> 01:19:10,913
Are you okay? You have any boo-boos?
Are you hurt?

1538
01:19:11,873 --> 01:19:13,458
[chuckles] Dad, I'm fine.

1539
01:19:13,541 --> 01:19:15,460
[Joker] How very touching.

1540
01:19:16,461 --> 01:19:17,920
Stand back, son.

1541
01:19:18,004 --> 01:19:19,881
Why didn't you tell me
you were a father?

1542
01:19:19,964 --> 01:19:21,132
I thought we were friends.

1543
01:19:21,215 --> 01:19:23,050
I'm not your friend, Joker.

1544
01:19:23,134 --> 01:19:25,344
I gotta say, love the beard.

1545
01:19:25,428 --> 01:19:27,638
Really takes the
intimidation game up a peg.

1546
01:19:27,722 --> 01:19:28,931
- Thanks.
- [Poison Ivy grunts]

1547
01:19:30,892 --> 01:19:32,226
[Joker grunts]

1548
01:19:32,310 --> 01:19:35,938
Looks like it's time to kill
two bats with one stone.

1549
01:19:37,565 --> 01:19:39,567
[grunts] Dad, I can do this.

1550
01:19:39,650 --> 01:19:42,111
Almost makes me miss my father.

1551
01:19:42,195 --> 01:19:45,406
But then I remember how he
dumped my bassinet in the sewer!

1552
01:19:46,949 --> 01:19:48,367
[Bane growling]

1553
01:19:49,494 --> 01:19:50,953
Just leave him alone.

1554
01:19:51,037 --> 01:19:52,037
[Bane growling]

1555
01:19:54,081 --> 01:19:56,250
Come on, I've been fighting
these guys all day.

1556
01:19:56,334 --> 01:19:57,752
Damian. I told you
to stay back.

1557
01:20:00,046 --> 01:20:01,231
Dad, listen to me. I can help.

1558
01:20:01,255 --> 01:20:03,674
I said no, Damian.
You're just a kid.

1559
01:20:03,758 --> 01:20:06,344
No, I'm not. I'm your kid, Dad.

1560
01:20:09,180 --> 01:20:10,348
[Joker cackling]

1561
01:20:15,436 --> 01:20:17,855
[in distorted voice] Dad!

1562
01:20:17,939 --> 01:20:18,939
[Bruce thuds on floor]

1563
01:20:22,944 --> 01:20:24,237
[ear ringing]

1564
01:20:25,404 --> 01:20:26,447
[The Penguin groans]

1565
01:20:26,531 --> 01:20:28,199
[groaning]

1566
01:20:29,700 --> 01:20:30,802
[Poison Ivy and Joker grunting]

1567
01:20:30,826 --> 01:20:32,787
[muffled] Don't worry, Dad.
I'll protect you.

1568
01:20:32,870 --> 01:20:34,664
- Nobody hurts my dad.
- [Joker grunting]

1569
01:20:35,748 --> 01:20:36,767
- What?
- [Damian grunting]

1570
01:20:36,791 --> 01:20:37,792
Hiyah!

1571
01:20:38,543 --> 01:20:39,585
[yells]

1572
01:20:40,586 --> 01:20:43,714
- [grunts] Not so tough without these, are you?
- [Bane grunting]

1573
01:20:45,007 --> 01:20:46,759
[all yelping]

1574
01:20:48,135 --> 01:20:49,345
[Damian grunts]

1575
01:20:50,429 --> 01:20:51,429
You okay, Dad?

1576
01:20:52,014 --> 01:20:54,725
He... he is my kid.

1577
01:20:55,393 --> 01:20:56,519
Batman is waking up.

1578
01:20:56,602 --> 01:20:57,478
[panting]

1579
01:20:57,562 --> 01:20:59,480
Leave my dad alone!

1580
01:20:59,564 --> 01:21:00,564
[Poison Ivy grunting]

1581
01:21:01,732 --> 01:21:05,236
Dude! Damian, rad ninja skills.

1582
01:21:05,319 --> 01:21:06,320
Thanks, Dad.

1583
01:21:07,780 --> 01:21:08,823
Where's the belt?

1584
01:21:09,824 --> 01:21:11,284
Long story.

1585
01:21:11,367 --> 01:21:12,285
Tell me later.

1586
01:21:12,368 --> 01:21:13,536
In the meantime...

1587
01:21:14,870 --> 01:21:15,705
Whoa!

1588
01:21:15,788 --> 01:21:17,456
Your utility belt?

1589
01:21:17,540 --> 01:21:18,541
Awesome!

1590
01:21:20,293 --> 01:21:22,128
Wait. What about you?

1591
01:21:22,211 --> 01:21:23,838
Always carry a spare.

1592
01:21:23,921 --> 01:21:25,339
Told you,
you had a lot to learn.

1593
01:21:26,132 --> 01:21:27,132
Now, what do you say?

1594
01:21:27,675 --> 01:21:28,926
You need a wingman?

1595
01:21:29,802 --> 01:21:32,888
- More like a sidekick.
- [The Penguin grunting]

1596
01:21:34,432 --> 01:21:37,810
Allow me to break the ice,
Little Batman. [yells]

1597
01:21:37,893 --> 01:21:39,937
Come on, kiddo.
Let's finish this.

1598
01:21:41,147 --> 01:21:43,065
[screams, grunts]

1599
01:21:46,152 --> 01:21:47,737
[screaming, grunts]

1600
01:21:51,824 --> 01:21:54,744
This is the best
Christmas present ever.

1601
01:21:56,787 --> 01:21:58,247
Oh, no.

1602
01:21:58,331 --> 01:22:00,499
- [screams]
- [splashes]

1603
01:22:00,583 --> 01:22:02,168
[grunts, coughs]

1604
01:22:02,251 --> 01:22:03,336
[Bane growling]

1605
01:22:04,837 --> 01:22:06,172
My back!

1606
01:22:06,839 --> 01:22:09,133
[laughing] Hot enough for you?

1607
01:22:09,967 --> 01:22:11,302
Not even close.

1608
01:22:11,385 --> 01:22:12,385
[chuckles]

1609
01:22:12,428 --> 01:22:13,721
Where's the little one?

1610
01:22:13,804 --> 01:22:15,014
[engine revs]

1611
01:22:18,351 --> 01:22:20,561
No! [grunts]

1612
01:22:20,645 --> 01:22:22,521
- [screams]
- [splashes]

1613
01:22:24,273 --> 01:22:26,442
[Joker] You two
look so cute together.

1614
01:22:26,525 --> 01:22:28,861
I almost hate
having to blow you apart.

1615
01:22:28,944 --> 01:22:29,779
[launcher cocks]

1616
01:22:29,862 --> 01:22:33,324
Yeah, crush their stupid faces.

1617
01:22:33,407 --> 01:22:34,575
[Batarang whizzing]

1618
01:22:34,659 --> 01:22:37,495
[Mr. Freeze screams, thuds]

1619
01:22:37,578 --> 01:22:40,748
[screaming and thudding
continues]

1620
01:22:43,417 --> 01:22:44,417
[splashing]

1621
01:22:45,711 --> 01:22:47,421
Uh-oh. Hit me, Damian!

1622
01:22:48,506 --> 01:22:50,549
Careful. Don't poke
your eye out.

1623
01:22:50,633 --> 01:22:51,759
[laughs]

1624
01:22:51,842 --> 01:22:54,595
A Merry Christmas
to me and to you,

1625
01:22:54,679 --> 01:22:56,347
a dark night.

1626
01:22:58,557 --> 01:22:59,892
[laughs] You missed!

1627
01:23:00,768 --> 01:23:02,687
That's kind of the point.

1628
01:23:02,770 --> 01:23:04,772
Oh. Oh, right,
they're Batarangs.

1629
01:23:07,024 --> 01:23:09,443
[groaning]

1630
01:23:11,445 --> 01:23:13,406
["Silent Night" playing]

1631
01:23:16,617 --> 01:23:17,868
[sirens wailing]

1632
01:23:21,872 --> 01:23:23,833
[distorted groaning]

1633
01:23:32,550 --> 01:23:34,969
[distorted laughing]

1634
01:23:40,224 --> 01:23:43,561
[distorted] Merry Christmas.

1635
01:23:49,900 --> 01:23:51,152
- [grunts]
- [villains] Ooh.

1636
01:23:51,235 --> 01:23:52,445
[both] Oh.

1637
01:23:53,988 --> 01:23:55,239
[both]
<i>♪ Da-na-na-na-na-na ♪</i>

1638
01:23:55,322 --> 01:23:57,199
[groaning]

1639
01:23:58,534 --> 01:24:00,703
How many times
is he gonna fall in that junk?

1640
01:24:00,786 --> 01:24:03,706
Seriously, he should keep
a snorkel in his suit pocket.

1641
01:24:03,789 --> 01:24:04,789
[Damian laughs]

1642
01:24:04,832 --> 01:24:07,126
[Batman] Ready to go home
for Christmas?

1643
01:24:07,209 --> 01:24:10,212
[Damian] Actually, Dad,
we have one last mission.

1644
01:24:12,506 --> 01:24:14,508
[sirens wailing faintly]

1645
01:24:22,266 --> 01:24:23,517
[clangs]

1646
01:24:29,732 --> 01:24:31,525
[Damian] Merry Christmas!

1647
01:24:31,609 --> 01:24:33,170
- [man] Look, it's Batman!
- [woman] Batman!

1648
01:24:33,194 --> 01:24:35,696
- All right.
- Hey, it's our stuff.

1649
01:24:35,780 --> 01:24:37,615
My drum set!

1650
01:24:37,698 --> 01:24:39,992
A one, and a two,
and a joy to you.

1651
01:24:40,075 --> 01:24:43,537
All right, everyone.
Christmas is back on.

1652
01:24:44,371 --> 01:24:45,456
[all grunt]

1653
01:24:45,539 --> 01:24:47,939
[marching band playing "Deck
The Halls With Boughs Of Holly"]

1654
01:24:50,628 --> 01:24:52,630
[Damian laughing]

1655
01:24:54,256 --> 01:24:55,674
[man] Look, it's our presents.

1656
01:24:55,758 --> 01:24:57,444
- Christmas is saved.
- [woman] Oh, wonderful.

1657
01:24:57,468 --> 01:24:58,677
[Alfred laughing]

1658
01:25:01,180 --> 01:25:02,973
[laughs] Go long.

1659
01:25:04,433 --> 01:25:05,643
[children laughing]

1660
01:25:07,728 --> 01:25:09,480
[all cheering]

1661
01:25:10,189 --> 01:25:12,733
Merry Christmas, Gotham City.

1662
01:25:16,529 --> 01:25:17,529
[yelps]

1663
01:25:20,324 --> 01:25:21,324
[slurps]

1664
01:25:21,909 --> 01:25:23,994
That would seem to be
all the presents, young sir.

1665
01:25:24,078 --> 01:25:26,205
Nope. Still one left.

1666
01:25:26,288 --> 01:25:27,331
What's that?

1667
01:25:27,414 --> 01:25:29,792
- Merry Christmas, Dad.
- [laughs]

1668
01:25:29,875 --> 01:25:31,085
I owed you a hug.

1669
01:25:31,168 --> 01:25:33,379
Best Christmas gift ever.

1670
01:25:33,462 --> 01:25:34,964
Hm, the price was right.

1671
01:25:35,047 --> 01:25:36,799
- [cat meows]
- I beg your pardon, sirs,

1672
01:25:36,882 --> 01:25:38,175
but by any chance,

1673
01:25:38,259 --> 01:25:42,304
is there room for an old Englishman
and a tabby in that embrace?

1674
01:25:42,388 --> 01:25:44,056
There always is.

1675
01:25:44,139 --> 01:25:45,724
Merry Christmas, guys.

1676
01:25:46,559 --> 01:25:47,601
[Damian sighs]

1677
01:25:47,685 --> 01:25:48,686
Damian, what's wrong?

1678
01:25:49,186 --> 01:25:53,274
I know it sounds silly, but
I kind of feel bad for Joker.

1679
01:25:53,357 --> 01:25:55,693
Feel bad for Joker?

1680
01:25:55,776 --> 01:25:57,278
[laughs] That sounds insane.

1681
01:25:57,361 --> 01:25:59,214
I mean, he just hit me in
the head with a mallet,

1682
01:25:59,238 --> 01:26:00,614
like an hour ago.

1683
01:26:00,698 --> 01:26:01,698
I know.

1684
01:26:01,740 --> 01:26:05,452
But all he wanted for
Christmas was to not be alone.

1685
01:26:07,746 --> 01:26:09,456
My head still hurts, Damian.

1686
01:26:09,540 --> 01:26:11,709
- I mean, that mallet was like this big.
- [Selina meows]

1687
01:26:11,792 --> 01:26:14,461
You know, Dad, you both say
that you're sworn enemies.

1688
01:26:14,545 --> 01:26:15,462
- [Selina purring]
- But deep down,

1689
01:26:15,546 --> 01:26:17,715
I think you and Joker
really like each other.

1690
01:26:17,798 --> 01:26:19,633
Damian, he's a supervillain.

1691
01:26:19,717 --> 01:26:21,051
Mom's a supervillain.

1692
01:26:21,135 --> 01:26:24,138
Mom's... complicated.

1693
01:26:24,221 --> 01:26:26,015
A complicated supervillain.

1694
01:26:26,098 --> 01:26:27,098
[Alfred and Damian laugh]

1695
01:26:27,141 --> 01:26:28,809
Hey, don't you start.

1696
01:26:28,893 --> 01:26:31,645
Also, I hate the Joker.

1697
01:26:35,900 --> 01:26:39,612
<i>♪ Jingle Bells, Batman smells
Robin laid an egg ♪</i>

1698
01:26:39,695 --> 01:26:40,529
[chuckles]

1699
01:26:40,613 --> 01:26:43,365
Sorry, it's the only Christmas
song I know the words to.

1700
01:26:43,449 --> 01:26:45,492
Well, "smells" does
rhyme with "bells."

1701
01:26:45,576 --> 01:26:47,328
I quite like that song.

1702
01:26:47,411 --> 01:26:49,496
<i>♪ Jingle Bells, Batman smells ♪</i>

1703
01:26:49,580 --> 01:26:51,832
[together]
♪ <i>Robin laid an egg ♪</i>

1704
01:26:51,916 --> 01:26:53,876
<i>♪ The Batmobile
Lost its wheel ♪</i>

1705
01:26:53,959 --> 01:26:59,673
<i>♪ And the Joker Had a nice
dinner With all of his friends ♪</i>

1706
01:27:02,426 --> 01:27:03,469
I'm not your friend.

1707
01:27:03,552 --> 01:27:05,346
["Just Another Christmas Song"
playing]

1708
01:27:19,485 --> 01:27:21,528
<i>♪ Uh... just another
Christmas song ♪</i>

1709
01:27:21,612 --> 01:27:23,697
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1710
01:27:25,115 --> 01:27:27,117
<i>♪ Uh... Just another
Christmas song ♪</i>

1711
01:27:27,201 --> 01:27:29,495
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1712
01:27:31,830 --> 01:27:36,752
<i>♪ I'm dreaming of
A white Christmas ♪</i>

1713
01:27:36,835 --> 01:27:40,631
<i>♪ With jingle bells
In the sky ♪</i>

1714
01:27:43,050 --> 01:27:47,137
<i>♪ Do you see what I see? ♪</i>

1715
01:27:47,221 --> 01:27:49,515
[vocalizing]

1716
01:27:49,598 --> 01:27:52,977
<i>♪ Christmas tree ♪</i>

1717
01:27:53,060 --> 01:27:57,815
<i>♪ It's the same old song ♪</i>

1718
01:27:57,898 --> 01:28:01,026
<i>♪ But I'll sing along ♪ - ♪
Just another Christmas song ♪</i>

1719
01:28:01,110 --> 01:28:03,112
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1720
01:28:03,195 --> 01:28:06,240
<i>♪ I'm gonna sing along ♪ - ♪
Just another Christmas song ♪</i>

1721
01:28:06,323 --> 01:28:08,701
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1722
01:28:08,784 --> 01:28:11,912
<i>- ♪ Just another little song ♪
- ♪ Just another Christmas song ♪</i>

1723
01:28:11,996 --> 01:28:14,039
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1724
01:28:14,123 --> 01:28:15,874
<i>♪ I said
I think I'll sing along ♪</i>

1725
01:28:15,958 --> 01:28:17,501
♪ <i>Just another</i>
<i>Christmas song ♪</i>

1726
01:28:17,584 --> 01:28:19,753
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1727
01:28:19,837 --> 01:28:20,837
[vocalizing]

1728
01:28:23,382 --> 01:28:25,217
<i>♪ This time I'll sing along ♪</i>

1729
01:28:28,762 --> 01:28:30,723
<i>♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪</i>

1730
01:28:30,806 --> 01:28:34,935
[children]
<i>Merry Christmas, everybody!</i>

1731
01:31:40,954 --> 01:31:42,456
[Bat-Dad]
Merry Christmas, guys.