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["Father Christmas"
by The Kinks playing]
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00:00:51,220 --> 00:00:54,431
{\an8}♪ When I was small
I believed in Santa Claus ♪
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00:00:54,431 --> 00:00:56,725
{\an8}♪ Though I knew it was my dad ♪
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00:00:57,476 --> 00:01:00,479
{\an8}♪ And I would hang up
My stocking at Christmas ♪
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00:01:00,479 --> 00:01:02,940
{\an8}♪ Open my presents
And I'd be glad ♪
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00:01:03,774 --> 00:01:06,652
{\an8}♪ But the last time I played
Father Christmas ♪
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00:01:06,652 --> 00:01:08,904
{\an8}♪ I stood outside
A department store ♪
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00:01:10,072 --> 00:01:12,991
{\an8}♪ A gang of kids came over
And mugged me ♪
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00:01:12,991 --> 00:01:15,369
{\an8}♪ And knocked my reindeer
To the floor ♪
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00:01:16,912 --> 00:01:20,791
{\an8}♪ They said Father Christmas
Give us some money ♪
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{\an8}♪ Don't mess around
With those silly toys ♪
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{\an8}♪ We'll beat you up
If you don't hand it over ♪
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{\an8}♪ We want your bread
So don't make us annoyed ♪
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{\an8}♪ Give all the toys ♪
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{\an8}♪ To the little rich boys ♪
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{\an8}♪ Father Christmas
Give us some money ♪
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00:01:42,020 --> 00:01:44,815
{\an8}♪ Don't mess around
With those silly toys ♪
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{\an8}♪ We'll beat you up
If you don't hand it over ♪
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{\an8}♪ We want your bread
So don't make us annoyed ♪
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{\an8}♪ Give all the toys ♪
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{\an8}♪ To the little rich boys ♪
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[song fades]
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[Selina yowls]
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[grunts]
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Master Wayne, come along now.
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Time for your cookie-wookies
before bedtime.
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Not yet, Alfred.
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Selina stole priceless art
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- from the Gotham City Museum.
- [meows]
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[in gruff voice]
I must have justice.
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[Damian grunts]
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00:02:36,575 --> 00:02:37,743
[laughing]
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- Ha!
- [meows]
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[grunts]
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{\an8}Phew! Close one, huh, Alfred?
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Close indeed.
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Now, let's end this madcappery
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before you actually
do break...
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[loud crash]
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...something like your great
grandfather's ashes.
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- [loud clattering]
- And that priceless Picasso.
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[ripping]
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[Damian laughing]
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[meows]
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There's no way to run, Selina.
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- [yowls]
- [grunts]
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[Selina meows]
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Ah-ha!
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[blows raspberry]
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Young man, may I remind you
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that Christmas is a mere
two days away?
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Father Christmas is watching.
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Good! 'Cause even Santa
wouldn't wanna miss this.
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[laughs]
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- [meows]
- Ha!
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[meows]
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[Damian] Whoa!
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Master Wayne.
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Will you be sleeping
down there again?
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- [yowls]
- [screaming]
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Whoa!
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- [thudding]
- [groaning]
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[meows]
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[thudding]
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Whoa!
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No. No. No, no, no.
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- [thud]
- [yowls]
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Whoa!
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[grunts] Whoa!
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[groans]
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[meows]
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[groaning]
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{\an8}What?
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[beeping]
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[dramatic music playing]
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Uh-oh.
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[metal clinking]
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[chuckles nervously]
How's it going?
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[gasps] Oh, my gosh!
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Are you okay?
Did you fall through that vent?
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Damian, you could've
gotten hurt.
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You shouldn't play
with the cat.
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You could've gotten
scratched, or worse!
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You could've gotten
a brain parasite
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from its fecal matter.
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[meows]
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[gasps] A boo-boo!
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Aw, Dad!
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Quit worrying so much.
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I'm totally fine.
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The HVAC unit broke
my fall, see?
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[crackling]
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[fart sound plays]
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Yeah.
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Damian, what have we said
about being more careful
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00:05:03,805 --> 00:05:06,433
and less destructive when
you're playing superhero?
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I'm not playing, Dad.
I'm training.
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To be a real hero. Like you.
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Picture it. You and me
fighting back to back.
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Fearless defenders
of the night.
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Protecting the weak.
Punishing the wicked.
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Crime doesn't stand a chance.
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Uh-huh. And I've told you,
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you're not ready
for that kind of stuff.
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Because being
a superhero takes...
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{\an8}[together] Focus,
responsibility and sacrifice.
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{\an8}I know. I know.
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Not to mention a pretty
high pain threshold.
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You know how many ribs
I've broken?
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All of them.
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{\an8}Cool! I want to break
all of my ribs, too.
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Come on, kiddo.
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Now look, even if I thought
you were ready
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to be a crime fighter,
which I don't,
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there isn't any crime
left in Gotham to fight.
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What do you mean?
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Damian? The day I found out
I was going to be a dad
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was the happiest day
I've had since...
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Well, a long time.
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It's like in one instant,
the only thing that mattered
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was protecting you
from ever getting hurt.
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So before you were born,
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I worked overtime
to make Gotham safe.
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- [grunts]
- [heavy metal music playing]
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[screaming]
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[screams, groans]
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[screaming]
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- [tires screeching]
- [siren wailing]
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- [birds chirping]
- [mellow music playing]
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- [heavy metal music playing]
- [alarm blaring]
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[laughs]
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What was that?
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[grunting and groaning]
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- [children laughing]
- [mellow music playing]
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[heavy metal music playing]
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{\an8}- [mellow music playing]
- In breaking news,
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{\an8}all of Gotham City's
supervillains
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{\an8}are now either behind bars
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{\an8}or have been forced
into retirement.
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{\an8}Gotham is officially
90 days crime free
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{\an8}as Batman continues
to clean it up.
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{\an8}Gotham City just voted
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{\an8}the safest place
on planet Earth.
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{\an8}[all cheering]
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There is no more crime
in Gotham.
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So enjoy being a kid.
147
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But I don't wanna be
just a kid.
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Whoa! You are way more
than just a kid.
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You're "my" kid.
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00:07:05,177 --> 00:07:07,095
- And that's the best kind.
- [giggling]
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00:07:07,095 --> 00:07:08,889
[both laugh]
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{\an8}Wait, Dad, what were you doing
down in the basement anyway?
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00:07:12,809 --> 00:07:14,936
Me? Oh, uh, I don't know.
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Maybe I was, uh...
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[chuckling] ...wrapping
someone's Christmas present.
156
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- [laughing]
- Yes! What is it?
157
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Tell me. Tell me. Tell me.
Tell me. Tell me.
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Sorry, sport. Bedtime.
159
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Can I at least get a hint?
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Let's just say it's something
no future superhero
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should be without.
162
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- Is it a Bat-grappling gun?
- Nope.
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- Razor-lined Bat-gauntlets.
- Good gravy. No!
164
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- Bat-ice skates?
- Skates?
165
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Now, that's just silly.
166
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[Damian] Is it
a Bat-laser torch?
167
00:07:43,340 --> 00:07:44,341
[Bruce] No.
168
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Bat-cryptographer sequencer?
169
00:07:50,347 --> 00:07:52,265
I'm not even sure what that is.
170
00:07:52,265 --> 00:07:54,601
A heat-seeking
Bat-rocket launcher?
171
00:07:54,601 --> 00:07:57,604
Nope. And you guessed
that already. Twice.
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- [laughing]
- [sips]
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Master Wayne,
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00:08:00,899 --> 00:08:03,068
stop playing with your
blood sausage.
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00:08:03,068 --> 00:08:05,278
[together] Right, yeah,
totally. Sorry, Alfred.
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00:08:05,278 --> 00:08:08,031
Now, let's enjoy
the traditional
177
00:08:08,031 --> 00:08:10,408
Christmas Eve
breakfast of my youth.
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Best hurry.
179
00:08:11,618 --> 00:08:14,537
If jellied eel sits too
long, it tends to...
180
00:08:15,455 --> 00:08:16,665
congeal.
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00:08:18,124 --> 00:08:19,084
[slurps]
182
00:08:19,876 --> 00:08:21,127
Mm. Mm.
183
00:08:24,756 --> 00:08:25,590
[sloshes]
184
00:08:26,424 --> 00:08:27,300
[clears throat]
185
00:08:31,263 --> 00:08:32,180
[Damian] Mm.
186
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[shushes] Donut tell anybody.
187
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[both laugh] Kapow!
188
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♪ Da-na-na-na-na-na ♪
189
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[slurps] And no cowls
at the table.
190
00:08:41,106 --> 00:08:43,650
Aw, come one.
It's Christmas Eve!
191
00:08:43,650 --> 00:08:45,485
Damian, you heard Alfred.
192
00:08:53,159 --> 00:08:54,286
Hmph.
193
00:08:56,204 --> 00:08:57,289
Ah, what the heck?
194
00:08:58,623 --> 00:09:00,292
Here you go, Damian.
195
00:09:00,292 --> 00:09:03,628
Whoa! You mean
I can open it now?
196
00:09:03,628 --> 00:09:06,006
Why not? You get
to stop guessing
197
00:09:06,006 --> 00:09:07,757
and I get to hear myself
think again.
198
00:09:07,757 --> 00:09:09,968
- It's a win-win.
- Mm-hm.
199
00:09:09,968 --> 00:09:11,720
Merry Christmas, kiddo.
200
00:09:14,931 --> 00:09:16,016
[gasps]
201
00:09:17,392 --> 00:09:19,811
My own utility belt!
202
00:09:19,811 --> 00:09:22,856
[laughs] Yeah, that was
my first utility belt, Damian.
203
00:09:22,856 --> 00:09:25,525
What? No way! Oh, man!
I can't believe it.
204
00:09:25,525 --> 00:09:27,861
This is the best, Dad!
You're the best!
205
00:09:27,861 --> 00:09:29,696
Alfred, isn't Dad the best?
206
00:09:29,696 --> 00:09:32,991
- [kisses]
- Oh, my. Yes.
207
00:09:32,991 --> 00:09:34,784
This is indeed exciting.
208
00:09:34,784 --> 00:09:36,619
Oh, what did you put
in the pouches?
209
00:09:40,165 --> 00:09:41,875
That's your Bat-first-aid kit.
210
00:09:41,875 --> 00:09:43,710
Oh, neat.
211
00:09:43,710 --> 00:09:45,295
How about this?
212
00:09:45,295 --> 00:09:47,047
Your Bat-mergency whistle.
213
00:09:47,047 --> 00:09:48,631
Nice. [inhales]
214
00:09:48,631 --> 00:09:51,593
Which should only be used
in case of a Bat-mergency.
215
00:09:52,469 --> 00:09:53,595
[sputters]
216
00:09:53,595 --> 00:09:56,389
{\an8}Whoa! A Batarang
217
00:09:56,389 --> 00:09:57,557
[laughs]
218
00:10:00,977 --> 00:10:02,520
- [meows]
- It's foam.
219
00:10:03,146 --> 00:10:05,148
But isn't it supposed to fly
back to me.
220
00:10:05,148 --> 00:10:06,483
So it can poke you in the eye?
221
00:10:06,483 --> 00:10:07,650
I don't think so.
222
00:10:07,650 --> 00:10:09,319
That's a practice Batarang.
223
00:10:11,404 --> 00:10:14,366
Dad, don't get me wrong.
I love this belt.
224
00:10:14,366 --> 00:10:16,659
I mean, I love, love, love it.
225
00:10:16,659 --> 00:10:18,328
But where's the, you know,
226
00:10:19,162 --> 00:10:20,246
cool stuff?
227
00:10:20,246 --> 00:10:21,331
You mean dangerous stuff?
228
00:10:21,956 --> 00:10:23,875
Damian, you'll have
to earn those things
when you're older.
229
00:10:23,875 --> 00:10:25,460
You still have a lot to learn.
230
00:10:25,460 --> 00:10:27,629
Oh, come on, Dad.
I'm not a baby.
231
00:10:27,629 --> 00:10:29,381
Hey, I never said
you were a baby.
232
00:10:29,381 --> 00:10:31,174
[Bruce over recording]
Emergency! Call for help.
233
00:10:31,174 --> 00:10:32,842
My precious little baby
is in danger.
234
00:10:33,927 --> 00:10:35,762
I'll re-record that for you.
235
00:10:37,180 --> 00:10:40,350
Damian, this is the first step
toward becoming a superhero.
236
00:10:40,350 --> 00:10:42,477
Believe me,
I agonized for months
237
00:10:42,477 --> 00:10:43,853
over whether you're
ready for even--
238
00:10:43,853 --> 00:10:45,980
- [device ringing]
- What's that?
239
00:10:45,980 --> 00:10:48,733
- It sounds like the--
- It can't be.
240
00:10:48,733 --> 00:10:50,819
Can't be what?
What can't it be?
241
00:10:50,819 --> 00:10:52,278
The Batphone.
242
00:10:53,113 --> 00:10:55,115
{\an8}Ooh, wait for me.
I'll put on my belt!
243
00:10:55,115 --> 00:10:56,783
I mean... [clears throat]
244
00:10:56,783 --> 00:10:57,951
[in deep voice] Wait for me.
245
00:10:57,951 --> 00:10:59,369
I'll put on my belt.
246
00:11:05,333 --> 00:11:06,459
[ringing continues]
247
00:11:07,544 --> 00:11:09,462
No one's called
this thing in years.
248
00:11:09,462 --> 00:11:11,756
Crime must be back
in Gotham.
249
00:11:11,756 --> 00:11:13,842
It's a Christmas miracle!
250
00:11:14,509 --> 00:11:16,052
- Hello?
- [voice chattering
indistinctly]
251
00:11:16,052 --> 00:11:17,512
It's the Justice League.
252
00:11:17,512 --> 00:11:19,681
{\an8}What? Are you serious?
253
00:11:19,681 --> 00:11:21,015
Quick. How's my belt look?
254
00:11:21,015 --> 00:11:23,435
Uh-huh. No, I... I hear you.
255
00:11:23,435 --> 00:11:25,687
A weather anomaly?
In Nova Scotia?
256
00:11:25,687 --> 00:11:27,147
Just let Clark handle it.
257
00:11:28,356 --> 00:11:31,025
It's Christmas Eve.
We all have plans.
258
00:11:31,025 --> 00:11:33,778
No need to send Superman.
We got this.
259
00:11:33,778 --> 00:11:35,196
Sorry, that was Damian.
260
00:11:35,196 --> 00:11:37,157
Yeah, he's eight now.
Crazy, right?
261
00:11:37,866 --> 00:11:39,242
You can't call anyone else?
262
00:11:39,242 --> 00:11:40,410
How about the Twins?
263
00:11:40,410 --> 00:11:42,328
- [indistinct chatter]
- They're not talking?
264
00:11:42,328 --> 00:11:44,414
Well tell them to activate
their Wonder Twin powers
265
00:11:44,414 --> 00:11:46,374
and form into mature adults.
266
00:11:47,834 --> 00:11:49,127
All right. Fine.
267
00:11:49,711 --> 00:11:50,587
I'll leave in five.
268
00:11:52,380 --> 00:11:54,424
Sorry, Damian. I gotta go.
269
00:11:54,424 --> 00:11:57,594
But I promise I'll be back
before Christmas.
270
00:11:57,594 --> 00:11:59,053
Wait, Dad! Dad! Dad!
271
00:11:59,053 --> 00:12:00,346
Let me come with you. Please!
272
00:12:01,055 --> 00:12:02,223
I don't think so, kiddo.
273
00:12:02,223 --> 00:12:04,726
It could be your Christmas
gift for the next year.
274
00:12:04,726 --> 00:12:06,186
For the next ten years!
275
00:12:07,270 --> 00:12:09,397
I can't risk it.
The answer's no.
276
00:12:11,733 --> 00:12:12,775
[Damian] Mm.
277
00:12:12,775 --> 00:12:15,320
Good. Now, where's your
emergency contact list?
278
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:16,362
Actually, never mind.
279
00:12:16,362 --> 00:12:17,947
I printed extra copies
for your belt.
280
00:12:21,451 --> 00:12:22,911
Okay. What do you do
281
00:12:22,911 --> 00:12:24,287
in the event
of a home invasion?
282
00:12:24,287 --> 00:12:25,371
Call the police.
283
00:12:25,371 --> 00:12:26,956
- Mental breakdown?
- Therapist.
284
00:12:26,956 --> 00:12:28,708
A race of giant,
super-intelligent
285
00:12:28,708 --> 00:12:30,251
fungus-beetles attack Gotham?
286
00:12:30,251 --> 00:12:32,253
{\an8}I don't know.
Call Commissioner Gordon?
287
00:12:32,253 --> 00:12:34,214
Commiss-- What? No!
288
00:12:34,214 --> 00:12:36,090
All he ever does
is pass the buck to me.
289
00:12:37,091 --> 00:12:38,551
I'll be back before
you know it, buddy.
290
00:12:39,969 --> 00:12:42,889
I shall ready the Batjet,
Master Wayne.
291
00:12:45,099 --> 00:12:46,267
{\an8}Batjet, huh?
292
00:13:02,075 --> 00:13:03,535
You're making record time
293
00:13:03,535 --> 00:13:05,495
for not having done this
in years, Bruce.
294
00:13:05,495 --> 00:13:07,330
[Batman] Did you program
the coordinates?
295
00:13:07,330 --> 00:13:09,249
And pre-heated
the seat warmer, sir.
296
00:13:11,251 --> 00:13:13,253
[clears throat] Shall I assume
297
00:13:13,253 --> 00:13:16,923
we did not see the Bat-razor
I left on the vanity?
298
00:13:16,923 --> 00:13:18,383
Really? The beard again?
299
00:13:19,175 --> 00:13:22,220
I like it. It totally ups
my intimidation game.
300
00:13:24,514 --> 00:13:27,850
{\an8}You have donut crumbs
in your intimidation game, sir.
301
00:13:29,769 --> 00:13:30,979
- Hm.
- [muffled alarm blaring]
302
00:13:30,979 --> 00:13:32,605
[Bruce over recording]
Emergency! Call for help.
303
00:13:32,605 --> 00:13:34,315
My precious little baby
is in danger.
304
00:13:34,315 --> 00:13:35,525
What the...
305
00:13:37,610 --> 00:13:39,445
- Emergency! Call for help.
- [meows]
306
00:13:39,445 --> 00:13:41,281
- My precious little baby...
- Come on.
307
00:13:41,281 --> 00:13:43,157
- Damian!
- [chuckles]
308
00:13:43,157 --> 00:13:44,617
Wow! Dad!
309
00:13:45,660 --> 00:13:47,662
You look awesome!
310
00:13:47,662 --> 00:13:49,497
Damian, get out of the bag.
311
00:13:49,497 --> 00:13:51,666
Come on, Dad, just let
me come with you.
312
00:13:51,666 --> 00:13:53,918
No. We don't have
time for this.
313
00:13:53,918 --> 00:13:55,503
You won't even know I'm here.
314
00:13:55,503 --> 00:13:56,754
I told you,
315
00:13:56,754 --> 00:13:59,424
- you're not ready.
- [groans]
316
00:13:59,424 --> 00:14:02,093
Ugh! Dad, look how hard
I've been training.
317
00:14:02,093 --> 00:14:03,428
I mean, check out
my rad ninja skills.
318
00:14:03,428 --> 00:14:05,680
- [Batman] Get over here. Argh!
- [grunting]
319
00:14:06,639 --> 00:14:08,641
Argh! My good hip. [groaning]
320
00:14:08,641 --> 00:14:10,727
Oh, my gosh! Alfred!
I'm so sorry.
321
00:14:11,477 --> 00:14:14,188
Damian Thomas Wayne!
That is enough!
322
00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:18,735
I just thought
323
00:14:19,611 --> 00:14:20,862
getting your belt meant
324
00:14:21,446 --> 00:14:23,615
that I was ready to be
a superhero like you.
325
00:14:24,324 --> 00:14:25,450
Well, it didn't.
326
00:14:26,117 --> 00:14:27,619
In fact, give me the belt.
327
00:14:27,619 --> 00:14:29,829
You're clearly
not ready for it.
328
00:14:29,829 --> 00:14:31,873
What? Dad, no!
329
00:14:32,957 --> 00:14:33,875
Damian.
330
00:14:48,264 --> 00:14:50,516
Hold on to this
until I get back.
331
00:14:51,225 --> 00:14:52,143
[sighs]
332
00:14:52,143 --> 00:14:53,603
Okay. Now give me a...
333
00:14:55,146 --> 00:14:56,272
goodbye hug?
334
00:15:03,863 --> 00:15:06,282
He'll be fine, sir.
I'll see to that.
335
00:15:07,116 --> 00:15:09,452
I knew he wasn't ready
to have his own belt.
336
00:15:10,161 --> 00:15:12,914
Yes. Well,
I can certainly agree
337
00:15:12,914 --> 00:15:14,916
that "someone" wasn't ready.
338
00:15:16,084 --> 00:15:16,918
[sighs]
339
00:15:18,878 --> 00:15:20,463
I gotta get going, Alfred.
340
00:15:24,884 --> 00:15:26,386
[engine powering up]
341
00:15:29,806 --> 00:15:31,140
[roaring]
342
00:15:31,140 --> 00:15:32,934
Godspeed, sir.
343
00:15:52,453 --> 00:15:53,788
Come along, Damian.
344
00:15:54,372 --> 00:15:57,333
I've got just the thing
to lift your spirits.
345
00:15:57,333 --> 00:16:00,753
A steaming mug of my
world-famous hot cocoa.
346
00:16:00,753 --> 00:16:02,839
With extra marshmallows.
347
00:16:03,464 --> 00:16:06,092
{\an8}Thanks, but coco's
kinda kid stuff.
348
00:16:06,092 --> 00:16:07,468
"Kid stuff?"
349
00:16:07,468 --> 00:16:09,762
Oh, your father
would disagree.
350
00:16:09,762 --> 00:16:12,890
I once saw him drink
an entire gallon
in one sitting.
351
00:16:12,890 --> 00:16:14,225
You did not.
352
00:16:14,225 --> 00:16:16,060
[Alfred] Did so.
And he had quite
353
00:16:16,060 --> 00:16:17,812
the swollen stomach
that evening.
354
00:16:17,812 --> 00:16:21,107
Why I had to take
the Batsuit out
an entire two inches
355
00:16:21,107 --> 00:16:22,817
before he could even
go out on patrol.
356
00:16:42,420 --> 00:16:43,880
[sighs]
357
00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:46,132
This is so unfair, Selina.
358
00:16:48,676 --> 00:16:49,552
[meows]
359
00:16:49,552 --> 00:16:51,387
You're right. I can't give up.
360
00:16:51,387 --> 00:16:54,348
I'll work even harder
to prove I'm ready
to be Batman.
361
00:16:55,266 --> 00:16:56,851
And you know what that means?
362
00:16:57,560 --> 00:16:59,812
{\an8}Time for some extreme training.
363
00:16:59,812 --> 00:17:00,938
[Alfred humming]
364
00:17:03,483 --> 00:17:06,068
[whispers] Unsupervised
extreme training.
365
00:17:08,571 --> 00:17:10,907
[Damian sighs dramatically]
366
00:17:10,907 --> 00:17:12,658
I don't know, Alfred.
367
00:17:12,658 --> 00:17:15,328
Do you really think
a steaming mug
368
00:17:15,328 --> 00:17:17,330
of your world-famous
hot cocoa
369
00:17:17,330 --> 00:17:19,749
with extra marshmallows
could help?
370
00:17:19,749 --> 00:17:22,084
Why I'm certain of it, sir.
371
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:24,754
Unless it's too much trouble.
372
00:17:24,754 --> 00:17:26,547
Nonsense. Coming up.
373
00:17:31,135 --> 00:17:34,222
All right, Pennyworth,
time to deliver your A-game.
374
00:17:40,812 --> 00:17:41,687
[chuckles]
375
00:17:42,522 --> 00:17:43,439
[munching]
376
00:17:45,608 --> 00:17:48,361
[gasps] Aw, man!
377
00:17:48,361 --> 00:17:49,362
[whirring]
378
00:17:58,454 --> 00:18:00,122
[beeps]
379
00:18:00,122 --> 00:18:01,207
Hm.
380
00:18:02,708 --> 00:18:03,626
Hmph.
381
00:18:03,626 --> 00:18:05,461
[munching]
382
00:18:06,254 --> 00:18:07,088
[groans]
383
00:18:13,094 --> 00:18:14,011
[clinking]
384
00:18:21,269 --> 00:18:24,272
And now
the piece de resistance.
385
00:18:25,273 --> 00:18:26,107
[gasps]
386
00:18:26,107 --> 00:18:29,193
Good heavens!
Out of marshmallows?
387
00:18:29,193 --> 00:18:30,528
- What?
- [meows]
388
00:18:30,528 --> 00:18:32,280
How did that happen?
389
00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:33,197
[gulps]
390
00:18:33,197 --> 00:18:35,533
This is catastrophic.
391
00:18:35,533 --> 00:18:36,951
[Damian] That's okay.
392
00:18:36,951 --> 00:18:38,202
After all, it's...
393
00:18:38,202 --> 00:18:40,496
it's only cocoa
without marshmallows.
394
00:18:41,497 --> 00:18:43,624
It's not like
it's Christmas Eve
395
00:18:43,624 --> 00:18:44,750
without my...
396
00:18:44,750 --> 00:18:46,168
[sniffles] ...dad.
397
00:18:46,168 --> 00:18:47,503
[imitates crying]
398
00:18:53,467 --> 00:18:54,802
[continues crying]
399
00:18:55,511 --> 00:18:57,138
[clears throat] Fear not.
400
00:18:57,138 --> 00:18:59,640
I shall return
before your cocoa
401
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:01,392
even has a chance to cool.
402
00:19:03,060 --> 00:19:04,729
[Damian panting]
403
00:19:04,729 --> 00:19:06,981
[grunts] You sure?
You really don't need to,
404
00:19:06,981 --> 00:19:08,900
but if you insist.
Hurry back. Okay, bye.
405
00:19:10,610 --> 00:19:12,737
And now, time to train
406
00:19:12,737 --> 00:19:14,488
for I am...
407
00:19:14,488 --> 00:19:16,407
the Night!
408
00:19:16,407 --> 00:19:19,076
[voice echoing] Night. Night.
409
00:19:19,076 --> 00:19:21,579
Night. Night...
410
00:19:22,580 --> 00:19:23,581
[engine whirring]
411
00:19:28,961 --> 00:19:30,504
[humming]
412
00:19:32,965 --> 00:19:34,050
{\an8}Oh, biscuits!
413
00:19:34,050 --> 00:19:35,217
[tires screeching]
414
00:19:37,887 --> 00:19:39,055
I beg your pardon.
415
00:19:39,889 --> 00:19:43,017
Hey, watch where
you're going, grandpa!
416
00:19:43,601 --> 00:19:46,270
There's some real psychos
in this neighborhood.
417
00:19:48,856 --> 00:19:51,108
[engine whirring
and backfiring]
418
00:19:52,693 --> 00:19:54,278
["Oi to the World"
by The Vandals playing]
419
00:20:05,623 --> 00:20:07,875
♪ If God came down
On Christmas Day ♪
420
00:20:07,875 --> 00:20:11,003
♪ I know exactly
What he'd say ♪
421
00:20:11,003 --> 00:20:13,589
♪ He'd say "Oi!" to the punks
And "Oi!" to the skins ♪
422
00:20:13,589 --> 00:20:16,425
♪ But "Oi!" to the world
And everybody wins ♪
423
00:20:16,425 --> 00:20:18,719
♪ Haji was a bloody mess
He ran out through the crowd ♪
424
00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:21,681
♪ He said, "We'll meet again
We are bloody yet unbowed" ♪
425
00:20:21,681 --> 00:20:24,100
♪ Trevor called his bluff
And told him where to meet ♪
426
00:20:24,100 --> 00:20:26,936
♪ Christmas Day on the roof
Down at 20 Oxford Street ♪
427
00:20:26,936 --> 00:20:29,522
♪ If God came down
On Christmas Day ♪
428
00:20:29,522 --> 00:20:31,899
♪ I know exactly
What he'd say ♪
429
00:20:31,899 --> 00:20:34,652
♪ He'd say "Oi!" to the punks
And "Oi!" to the skins ♪
430
00:20:34,652 --> 00:20:37,363
♪ But "Oi!" to the world
And everybody wins ♪
431
00:20:40,491 --> 00:20:42,743
♪ If God came down
On Christmas Day ♪
432
00:20:42,743 --> 00:20:45,121
♪ I know exactly
What he'd say ♪
433
00:20:45,121 --> 00:20:47,748
♪ He'd say "Oi!" to the punks
And "Oi!" to the skins ♪
434
00:20:47,748 --> 00:20:50,751
♪ But "Oi!" to the world
And everybody wins ♪
435
00:20:50,751 --> 00:20:51,836
[laughs]
436
00:20:51,836 --> 00:20:54,255
I don't need some trip
to Nova Scotia.
437
00:20:54,255 --> 00:20:57,508
This is the best
Christmas Eve ever!
438
00:20:57,508 --> 00:20:59,427
[voice echoing] Ever! Ever!
439
00:20:59,427 --> 00:21:02,430
I haven't determined the cause
of the Batjet malfunction,
440
00:21:02,430 --> 00:21:04,348
but there's no anomaly up here.
441
00:21:04,348 --> 00:21:06,350
In fact,
it's a perfectly typical
442
00:21:06,350 --> 00:21:08,394
- Nova Scotia blizzard!
- [wind howling]
443
00:21:08,394 --> 00:21:10,438
[indistinct voice over phone]
444
00:21:11,897 --> 00:21:13,816
What do you mean,
"What anomaly," J'onn?
445
00:21:13,816 --> 00:21:16,027
If you didn't send me here,
who did?
446
00:21:16,027 --> 00:21:18,487
Ugh! [groaning]
447
00:21:18,487 --> 00:21:20,573
- [crackling]
- Oh, no. Hello?
448
00:21:21,323 --> 00:21:22,908
J'onzz? Hello!
449
00:21:24,702 --> 00:21:25,536
Great.
450
00:21:26,412 --> 00:21:28,497
I can't miss Christmas.
451
00:21:29,498 --> 00:21:31,876
Damian, I'm coming!
452
00:21:31,876 --> 00:21:33,544
[wind howling]
453
00:21:38,841 --> 00:21:40,009
[crashing]
454
00:21:40,009 --> 00:21:41,594
[man and woman straining]
455
00:21:41,594 --> 00:21:44,096
Please, why are you doing this?
456
00:21:44,096 --> 00:21:46,599
Yeah. It's Christmas,
you monster.
457
00:21:47,266 --> 00:21:49,310
I'm just making
some Christmas memories.
458
00:21:49,894 --> 00:21:51,103
Say, "Cheese."
459
00:21:51,103 --> 00:21:53,606
Ugh! Stop it with the videos.
460
00:21:53,606 --> 00:21:56,609
What? Is it a crime
to document our crimes.
461
00:21:56,609 --> 00:21:58,277
[Francine] Just throw
the goods in the van,
462
00:21:58,277 --> 00:21:59,570
- you idiot!
- [loud crash]
463
00:21:59,570 --> 00:22:01,322
We've got a lot
of mansions to hit.
464
00:22:02,573 --> 00:22:03,407
[timer dings]
465
00:22:06,577 --> 00:22:09,163
And now, the most important
part of training,
466
00:22:09,163 --> 00:22:12,083
the post-workout carbo load.
467
00:22:13,584 --> 00:22:15,086
[gulping]
468
00:22:16,504 --> 00:22:17,755
It's good.
469
00:22:17,755 --> 00:22:21,675
But it could have a bit more
turbo charge.
470
00:22:22,635 --> 00:22:23,677
[bubbling]
471
00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:26,222
[chuckles, screams]
472
00:22:28,057 --> 00:22:29,600
[groaning]
473
00:22:32,019 --> 00:22:34,396
I survived an explosion.
474
00:22:35,064 --> 00:22:36,190
Again.
475
00:22:41,403 --> 00:22:42,571
[crackling]
476
00:22:50,538 --> 00:22:53,582
[Francine] This neighborhood's
prime for the picking.
477
00:22:53,582 --> 00:22:54,959
[Terry] Which house
do you want to hit next?
478
00:22:55,584 --> 00:22:56,418
[glass shatters]
479
00:23:00,089 --> 00:23:01,423
That one will do.
480
00:23:01,423 --> 00:23:02,800
So big.
481
00:23:10,182 --> 00:23:11,475
[thudding]
482
00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:15,020
Oh, man.
Alfred's back already?
483
00:23:19,024 --> 00:23:21,318
Ah, we've hit a gold mine.
484
00:23:21,318 --> 00:23:23,612
Looks like no one's home.
485
00:23:24,196 --> 00:23:26,657
Will you shut up and help me,
you ding-dong?
486
00:23:28,450 --> 00:23:29,285
Burglars!
487
00:23:30,578 --> 00:23:32,955
Oh, no. What do I do?
What do I do?
488
00:23:38,252 --> 00:23:39,128
[grunts]
489
00:23:39,128 --> 00:23:40,838
Okay, Damian, calm down.
490
00:23:40,838 --> 00:23:42,631
Think. It's just
a home invasion.
491
00:23:42,631 --> 00:23:44,008
A home invasion?
492
00:23:44,008 --> 00:23:46,635
Dad never told me what to do
in case of one of these.
493
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:50,681
Ugh! What is this?
Bulletproof glass?
494
00:23:50,681 --> 00:23:51,891
- Here, I've got it.
- No, no, no!
495
00:23:51,891 --> 00:23:53,434
- [grunts]
- [glass shatters]
496
00:23:53,434 --> 00:23:54,351
[exclaims]
497
00:23:56,020 --> 00:23:56,854
[exclaims]
498
00:23:57,730 --> 00:23:58,564
Ugh!
499
00:23:59,231 --> 00:24:01,108
- [Bruce over recording]
Emergency...
- Not now. Come on, turn off.
500
00:24:01,108 --> 00:24:02,276
- Turn off.
- ...my baby is in--
501
00:24:02,276 --> 00:24:03,194
[panting]
502
00:24:10,659 --> 00:24:11,660
Told you I had it.
503
00:24:12,244 --> 00:24:13,329
[rousing music playing]
504
00:24:16,373 --> 00:24:17,208
[chuckles]
505
00:24:17,208 --> 00:24:20,294
Terry, I think
we hit the jackpot.
506
00:24:20,294 --> 00:24:21,462
Cha-ching.
507
00:24:23,005 --> 00:24:25,007
What have I told you
about that stupid phone?
508
00:24:25,007 --> 00:24:27,176
What? Uh-oh.
509
00:24:27,176 --> 00:24:29,428
- [punch lands]
- [Terry] Ouch! I bit my tongue.
510
00:24:29,428 --> 00:24:31,096
- [meows]
- [shushes]
511
00:24:32,097 --> 00:24:33,974
Ah, there's so much stuff.
512
00:24:33,974 --> 00:24:36,602
How are we gonna fit all
this junk inside the van?
513
00:24:36,602 --> 00:24:38,812
We'll just grab what we can
and get a move on.
514
00:24:38,812 --> 00:24:40,856
The boss doesn't like
to be kept waiting.
515
00:24:40,856 --> 00:24:42,149
Yeah, that's true.
516
00:24:42,149 --> 00:24:43,943
Remember what happened
to the last bloke?
517
00:24:43,943 --> 00:24:45,319
Ugh! Don't remind me.
518
00:24:45,319 --> 00:24:46,946
I can still hear his screams.
519
00:24:49,740 --> 00:24:51,909
{\an8}Hang on, Selina.
I'm calling for help.
520
00:24:52,618 --> 00:24:54,536
[breathes heavily] Police.
521
00:24:56,163 --> 00:24:57,915
[operator] Gotham City Police.
How can I help you?
522
00:24:57,915 --> 00:25:00,501
[Terry chuckles]
Check out this cool belt.
523
00:25:00,501 --> 00:25:01,418
[gasps]
524
00:25:02,169 --> 00:25:04,421
[Terry] You think I could
rock something like this?
525
00:25:04,421 --> 00:25:06,840
Just throw it in the bag,
you idiot.
526
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:07,883
Yeah, okay.
527
00:25:07,883 --> 00:25:09,426
I'm gonna try you on...
528
00:25:09,426 --> 00:25:13,305
[in slowed voice] ...later.
529
00:25:13,305 --> 00:25:15,557
[slowed voice] No!
530
00:25:22,147 --> 00:25:23,524
They can't take my belt.
531
00:25:23,524 --> 00:25:25,359
{\an8}Dad already thinks
I'm not ready for it.
532
00:25:25,359 --> 00:25:27,945
{\an8}It'll be years before
he trusts me with another one.
533
00:25:29,530 --> 00:25:31,490
{\an8}Unless I get it back myself,
534
00:25:31,490 --> 00:25:34,243
{\an8}then Dad would see that
I am ready to be a superhero.
535
00:25:34,994 --> 00:25:36,620
[operator] Hello?
What's the emergency?
536
00:25:36,620 --> 00:25:37,955
Is anyone injured?
537
00:25:37,955 --> 00:25:40,833
No. But they will be.
538
00:25:40,833 --> 00:25:42,167
- [operator] Hello?
- [call disconnects]
539
00:25:44,837 --> 00:25:46,380
- Come on, Selina.
- [meows]
540
00:25:46,380 --> 00:25:48,966
- [footsteps]
- [Francine] You hear something?
541
00:25:55,306 --> 00:25:57,308
[both laughing]
542
00:26:00,144 --> 00:26:04,189
{\an8}Man, they wasted
a lot of moolah
on a bunch of dumb books.
543
00:26:04,189 --> 00:26:07,776
There's a whole shelf
on excavating shale rock
from underneath manors.
544
00:26:08,736 --> 00:26:10,070
That's weirdly specific.
545
00:26:11,488 --> 00:26:13,198
[Damian in deep voice]
Hasn't anyone ever told you
546
00:26:13,198 --> 00:26:14,992
to be quiet in a library?
547
00:26:22,875 --> 00:26:24,501
[grunting]
548
00:26:25,794 --> 00:26:27,671
{\an8}Give me back my belt.
549
00:26:29,214 --> 00:26:31,508
Okay, you have got
to be kidding me.
550
00:26:31,508 --> 00:26:33,719
[chuckles] Now, this
I've got to get.
551
00:26:33,719 --> 00:26:35,763
Nice entrance, kid.
552
00:26:35,763 --> 00:26:37,222
What are you supposed to be?
553
00:26:37,222 --> 00:26:38,682
{\an8}I'm Batman.
554
00:26:38,682 --> 00:26:42,019
{\an8}And your night just got
a whole lot darker.
555
00:26:42,978 --> 00:26:45,272
All right. Come here, kid.
556
00:26:45,272 --> 00:26:47,232
[exclaims] Where did he go?
557
00:26:47,232 --> 00:26:48,275
Peek-a-boo!
558
00:26:50,361 --> 00:26:52,988
- [grunts]
- Ugh, just my luck.
559
00:26:52,988 --> 00:26:54,823
Okay, you little brat.
560
00:26:54,823 --> 00:26:56,158
You had your fun.
561
00:26:56,158 --> 00:26:58,369
Uh, I can't see anything.
562
00:26:58,369 --> 00:27:00,204
[Damian] You can even
say you're blind
563
00:27:00,204 --> 00:27:01,330
as a bat.
564
00:27:01,330 --> 00:27:03,332
- What was that?
- What's going on?
565
00:27:03,332 --> 00:27:04,291
[Damian chuckles]
566
00:27:05,584 --> 00:27:06,418
Adios.
567
00:27:07,336 --> 00:27:09,296
Get over here,
you little turdmuffin!
568
00:27:09,296 --> 00:27:10,964
[both groan]
569
00:27:12,466 --> 00:27:15,427
[groans] I'm gonna
tear that bat's wings off.
570
00:27:15,427 --> 00:27:16,929
Is that all you got?
571
00:27:19,306 --> 00:27:20,307
Uh-oh.
572
00:27:20,891 --> 00:27:22,976
[both screaming]
573
00:27:22,976 --> 00:27:24,228
[chuckling]
574
00:27:28,065 --> 00:27:29,525
Argh!
575
00:27:29,525 --> 00:27:31,527
- [thudding]
- [groaning]
576
00:27:31,527 --> 00:27:33,070
I'm gonna puke.
577
00:27:34,905 --> 00:27:35,739
[loud crash]
578
00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:40,035
[both groaning]
579
00:27:43,747 --> 00:27:45,541
I'm over here, bozos!
580
00:27:45,541 --> 00:27:47,876
Come and get me. [chuckles]
581
00:27:47,876 --> 00:27:50,295
I'm gonna deck the halls
with this kid.
582
00:27:50,295 --> 00:27:51,338
[both scream]
583
00:27:51,338 --> 00:27:53,132
[both groaning]
584
00:27:55,300 --> 00:27:56,510
[screaming continues]
585
00:27:59,888 --> 00:28:00,806
Ha!
586
00:28:02,307 --> 00:28:03,308
[whirring]
587
00:28:03,976 --> 00:28:05,811
[both screaming]
588
00:28:05,811 --> 00:28:07,062
[grunting]
589
00:28:13,402 --> 00:28:14,528
What the...
590
00:28:14,528 --> 00:28:15,821
A kiddy pool?
591
00:28:15,821 --> 00:28:18,365
That's to put out
the grease fire.
592
00:28:18,365 --> 00:28:20,534
Water doesn't put out
grease fires.
593
00:28:20,534 --> 00:28:21,994
Exactly.
594
00:28:26,081 --> 00:28:28,083
[Francine and Terry screaming]
595
00:28:37,509 --> 00:28:38,927
[grunts]
596
00:28:40,262 --> 00:28:41,096
[chuckles]
597
00:28:41,096 --> 00:28:43,891
[both screaming]
598
00:28:46,977 --> 00:28:48,187
[screaming]
599
00:28:51,523 --> 00:28:52,774
Is that our...
600
00:28:52,774 --> 00:28:54,234
[beeping]
601
00:28:55,444 --> 00:28:57,196
[horn honking]
602
00:28:57,196 --> 00:28:58,113
[snaps, pops]
603
00:29:01,158 --> 00:29:03,243
Ugh! Congealed eel?
604
00:29:03,243 --> 00:29:05,037
That's it! I've had it!
605
00:29:05,037 --> 00:29:06,830
Grab what you can.
We're out of here.
606
00:29:08,582 --> 00:29:10,250
Load up. I'll start the van.
607
00:29:12,085 --> 00:29:14,254
- [straining]
- Let it go, kid.
608
00:29:14,254 --> 00:29:16,924
Give me back my utility belt.
609
00:29:16,924 --> 00:29:19,259
You mean my utility belt?
610
00:29:20,761 --> 00:29:23,013
[Bruce over recording]
Emergency! Call for help.
611
00:29:23,013 --> 00:29:24,932
- My precious little baby is...
- There it is.
612
00:29:24,932 --> 00:29:27,142
- [ripping]
- [both groan]
613
00:29:27,142 --> 00:29:28,519
Ugh! [gasps]
614
00:29:29,645 --> 00:29:30,729
Will you hurry up?
615
00:29:31,605 --> 00:29:32,523
[engine whirring]
616
00:29:33,482 --> 00:29:35,943
- [chuckles]
- Stop! Get back here.
617
00:29:37,694 --> 00:29:38,820
[honks]
618
00:29:39,446 --> 00:29:40,280
Later, kid.
619
00:29:41,281 --> 00:29:43,283
[Damian grunts]
620
00:29:43,283 --> 00:29:45,786
Now, you're gonna feel
my ninja skills.
621
00:29:45,786 --> 00:29:47,246
[Terry] This kid
just won't quit.
622
00:29:47,246 --> 00:29:48,497
Oh, that's no kid.
623
00:29:48,497 --> 00:29:50,332
[growling]
624
00:29:50,332 --> 00:29:52,459
That's some kind
of feral mutant.
625
00:29:53,043 --> 00:29:54,419
Whoa!
626
00:29:55,295 --> 00:29:57,422
Oh, no!
The boss is gonna kill us.
627
00:29:57,422 --> 00:29:59,841
[chuckles]
Now you've got nothing.
628
00:29:59,841 --> 00:30:02,219
Oh, I wouldn't say nothing.
629
00:30:02,219 --> 00:30:04,429
Whoa! [groans]
630
00:30:05,305 --> 00:30:06,640
[Terry] I got your belt.
631
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,642
You lose, kid.
632
00:30:10,894 --> 00:30:12,145
[groaning]
633
00:30:14,273 --> 00:30:15,107
[growls]
634
00:30:17,276 --> 00:30:18,151
Hm?
635
00:30:18,902 --> 00:30:20,070
{\an8}Whoa!
636
00:30:21,697 --> 00:30:22,698
[wind whistles]
637
00:30:24,408 --> 00:30:28,412
{\an8}My belt may be gone,
but this is far from over.
638
00:30:28,412 --> 00:30:30,497
I will have vengeance.
639
00:30:30,497 --> 00:30:32,457
Because they didn't
cross some kid.
640
00:30:33,083 --> 00:30:34,960
They crossed Batman's kid!
641
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:36,503
[thunder breaks]
642
00:30:42,009 --> 00:30:43,343
[Selina meows]
643
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:49,349
Sorry, Selina,
but you can't come.
644
00:30:49,349 --> 00:30:51,393
This is gonna be
way too dangerous.
645
00:30:52,477 --> 00:30:54,271
Once I pass through
these doors,
646
00:30:54,271 --> 00:30:56,565
the Damian you knew
will be no more.
647
00:30:56,565 --> 00:30:58,191
I know, you're scared for me.
648
00:30:58,191 --> 00:31:00,569
And honestly,
I'm a little scared, too.
649
00:31:01,278 --> 00:31:02,446
- But...
- [snoring]
650
00:31:03,905 --> 00:31:04,740
Oh.
651
00:31:06,700 --> 00:31:08,368
[whispers] Take care
of the house while I'm gone.
652
00:31:10,954 --> 00:31:12,789
[dramatic music plays]
653
00:31:24,676 --> 00:31:25,594
[panting]
654
00:31:53,664 --> 00:31:55,082
[muzak playing]
655
00:31:59,044 --> 00:32:02,547
♪ O holy night
The Stars... ♪
656
00:32:02,547 --> 00:32:04,091
[dramatic music playing]
657
00:32:04,925 --> 00:32:05,926
[chuckles]
658
00:32:21,983 --> 00:32:23,151
[bats screeching]
659
00:32:24,945 --> 00:32:26,238
Whoo-hoo!
660
00:32:30,492 --> 00:32:32,202
Let's see
that ice cream truck
661
00:32:32,202 --> 00:32:34,830
outrun this sick set
of wheels.
662
00:32:35,831 --> 00:32:37,666
[chuckling] Oh,
what do we have here?
663
00:32:46,508 --> 00:32:47,426
Huh...
664
00:32:48,468 --> 00:32:49,511
It's a bit saggy.
665
00:32:52,055 --> 00:32:54,933
Well, that one just leaves
nothing to the imagination.
666
00:33:07,654 --> 00:33:08,780
What's this?
667
00:33:10,699 --> 00:33:11,992
{\an8}[gasps]
668
00:33:14,870 --> 00:33:16,455
{\an8}No way.
669
00:33:26,757 --> 00:33:28,383
Dad made me a Batsuit.
670
00:33:30,218 --> 00:33:31,386
[grunting]
671
00:33:33,805 --> 00:33:34,931
Awesome.
672
00:33:38,769 --> 00:33:41,646
{\an8}Whoa! Wait until
they get a load of me.
673
00:33:42,314 --> 00:33:44,566
Damian. It's Dad.
674
00:33:44,566 --> 00:33:45,776
Dad?
675
00:33:45,776 --> 00:33:48,945
If you're wearing that suit,
it means I am dead,
676
00:33:48,945 --> 00:33:50,822
and my worst fear
has come true.
677
00:33:50,822 --> 00:33:52,324
Crime is back in Gotham.
678
00:33:53,158 --> 00:33:55,410
And now you must take my place
and become...
679
00:33:56,369 --> 00:33:57,287
the Batman.
680
00:33:58,163 --> 00:34:00,499
Unless you broke into
the Batcave
and stole the suit,
681
00:34:00,499 --> 00:34:04,169
in which case you're
in big trouble, mister.
You just wait till I get home.
682
00:34:04,169 --> 00:34:05,170
Yikes.
683
00:34:06,171 --> 00:34:09,758
By now, I'd already
given you the utility belt
that goes with your suit.
684
00:34:09,758 --> 00:34:13,094
That Batsuit is the most
technologically advanced yet.
685
00:34:13,094 --> 00:34:14,346
Heck, yeah.
686
00:34:14,346 --> 00:34:16,056
But before we get
into that tech,
687
00:34:16,056 --> 00:34:18,141
there's a few things
your father would like
to share with you,
688
00:34:18,141 --> 00:34:19,810
in case we never
got the chance.
689
00:34:19,810 --> 00:34:21,228
Like when I met your mom.
690
00:34:21,228 --> 00:34:23,563
Damian, your mother
was a total smokeshow.
691
00:34:23,563 --> 00:34:26,441
[gags] How do you
fast forward this thing?
692
00:34:26,441 --> 00:34:28,568
- ...Sugar Moose.
- [electrical buzzing]
693
00:34:28,568 --> 00:34:29,736
...you might be
getting to that age
694
00:34:29,736 --> 00:34:32,113
where your body
is going through
some changes...
695
00:34:32,113 --> 00:34:33,532
Ugh! Gross.
696
00:34:33,532 --> 00:34:34,783
[electrical buzzing]
697
00:34:36,660 --> 00:34:38,286
You gotta be careful, Damian.
698
00:34:38,286 --> 00:34:39,287
[laughs]
699
00:34:39,287 --> 00:34:42,958
Oh, Alfred,
the diaper's integrity,
it's been compromised.
700
00:34:42,958 --> 00:34:45,544
- I need wipes...
- Ah, Dad.
701
00:34:45,544 --> 00:34:46,795
[electrical buzzing]
702
00:34:48,296 --> 00:34:50,006
...and though I'd won
the brutal fight,
703
00:34:50,006 --> 00:34:53,343
the searing pain
of the injuries I sustained
are still with me.
704
00:34:53,343 --> 00:34:54,344
Every day.
705
00:34:55,637 --> 00:34:57,430
Okay, so, onto the Batsuit.
706
00:34:57,430 --> 00:34:58,598
Yeah!
707
00:34:58,598 --> 00:35:02,769
To be honest, Damian,
part of me never wanted you
to have to put that suit on.
708
00:35:02,769 --> 00:35:05,146
But another part of me
always knew deep down
709
00:35:05,146 --> 00:35:07,649
that this is what
you were born to do.
710
00:35:07,649 --> 00:35:11,319
My only regret
is not being by your side
when you did it.
711
00:35:11,319 --> 00:35:14,197
Thankfully, that's where
the suit's tech comes in.
712
00:35:14,197 --> 00:35:18,577
With the help of AI,
I've programmed myself
into the suit.
713
00:35:18,577 --> 00:35:20,787
Activating Bat-Dad.
714
00:35:20,787 --> 00:35:22,539
[electrical buzzing]
715
00:35:30,964 --> 00:35:32,215
[automated voice]
Upload complete.
716
00:35:32,215 --> 00:35:33,425
[laughs]
717
00:35:33,425 --> 00:35:35,594
Okay. Good luck, Damian.
718
00:35:35,594 --> 00:35:38,680
And remember,
I'll be with you always.
719
00:35:39,764 --> 00:35:41,349
Ending transmission.
720
00:35:41,349 --> 00:35:42,392
[both] Kapow!
721
00:35:42,392 --> 00:35:44,185
♪ Da-na-na-na-na-na ♪
722
00:35:47,731 --> 00:35:48,648
Dad?
723
00:35:51,735 --> 00:35:53,528
[electrical buzzing]
724
00:35:53,528 --> 00:35:56,448
[Bat-Dad] Bat-Dad online.
Hello, Damian.
725
00:35:56,448 --> 00:35:59,784
{\an8}Wow, you can talk? Cool.
726
00:35:59,784 --> 00:36:02,787
{\an8}Uh... computer, status report.
727
00:36:02,787 --> 00:36:04,623
Please, call me Bat-Dad.
728
00:36:04,623 --> 00:36:08,543
Bio scans indicate
you are eight years
and four days old.
729
00:36:08,543 --> 00:36:11,046
Recommendation,
time for night-night.
730
00:36:11,046 --> 00:36:14,299
{\an8}Great. It's just as overbearing
as the real thing.
731
00:36:14,299 --> 00:36:16,635
Would you like me
to read you a story?
732
00:36:16,635 --> 00:36:18,053
{\an8}No, thank you.
733
00:36:18,053 --> 00:36:22,223
My memory matrix says
I would often read Happy
Puppy's First Day of School.
734
00:36:22,223 --> 00:36:24,142
We don't have time for this,
Bat-Dad.
735
00:36:24,142 --> 00:36:26,394
I have it downloaded
in six languages.
736
00:36:26,394 --> 00:36:28,647
- [speaking Spanish]
- [Damian speaks in English]
Mute, mute, mute!
737
00:36:28,647 --> 00:36:31,316
[Bat-Dad] It sounds like
you'd like to mute
your dead father.
738
00:36:31,316 --> 00:36:33,234
Would you like to mute
your dead father?
739
00:36:33,234 --> 00:36:36,988
{\an8}No. I mean, yes,
but my dad isn't...
740
00:36:38,156 --> 00:36:39,658
Just mute, please.
741
00:36:39,658 --> 00:36:41,743
No mute function found.
742
00:36:41,743 --> 00:36:43,078
Then why did you just offer?
743
00:36:52,295 --> 00:36:53,880
Whoa!
744
00:36:55,507 --> 00:36:57,509
{\an8}Awesome.
745
00:36:57,509 --> 00:36:59,344
[Bat-Dad] I'm not
detecting a car seat.
746
00:36:59,344 --> 00:37:01,888
Safety guidelines recommend
children under ten--
747
00:37:01,888 --> 00:37:04,849
Can we just focus?
I need to get my belt back.
748
00:37:04,849 --> 00:37:06,810
[Bat-Dad] Affirmative.
The ability to focus
749
00:37:06,810 --> 00:37:09,396
is a quality
every good superhero
must possess.
750
00:37:09,396 --> 00:37:10,689
Uh-huh, yep, thanks.
751
00:37:10,689 --> 00:37:13,566
But I already know
the qualities
of a good superhero.
752
00:37:13,566 --> 00:37:16,111
[Bat-Dad] Excellent.
Would you care to review?
753
00:37:16,111 --> 00:37:18,655
Focus, responsibility,
sacrifice--
754
00:37:18,655 --> 00:37:20,365
Please, just stop talking.
755
00:37:20,365 --> 00:37:22,492
Now let's drive this car.
756
00:37:23,952 --> 00:37:25,537
[engine whirring]
757
00:37:36,172 --> 00:37:37,007
[engine stops]
758
00:37:37,841 --> 00:37:39,175
[engine grumbles]
759
00:37:41,219 --> 00:37:42,971
[sputtering]
760
00:37:43,972 --> 00:37:45,640
Come on, go.
761
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:48,852
Ugh! What's wrong
with this thing?
762
00:37:50,311 --> 00:37:51,688
[system starts]
763
00:37:51,688 --> 00:37:53,148
[engine starts]
764
00:37:59,279 --> 00:38:00,113
[laughs]
765
00:38:02,032 --> 00:38:03,742
[exclaims]
766
00:38:03,742 --> 00:38:05,076
♪ Really, want
Really want for Christmas ♪
767
00:38:05,076 --> 00:38:09,622
♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪
768
00:38:10,540 --> 00:38:11,791
[Damian] Whoo-hoo!
769
00:38:11,791 --> 00:38:19,132
♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪
770
00:38:19,132 --> 00:38:21,092
Ooh. What's this red button do?
771
00:38:21,092 --> 00:38:23,595
[Bat-Dad]
That is the turbo thruster.
But I would advise against--
772
00:38:25,013 --> 00:38:26,931
This is awesome!
773
00:38:26,931 --> 00:38:32,020
♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪
774
00:38:32,020 --> 00:38:33,938
{\an8}♪ Is everything
On my list, baby, hey ♪
775
00:38:33,938 --> 00:38:41,488
♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪
776
00:38:41,488 --> 00:38:43,490
♪ Is everything
On my list, baby, hey ♪
777
00:38:43,490 --> 00:38:45,492
♪ Under the mistletoe
I got it made ♪
778
00:38:46,201 --> 00:38:48,244
♪ Red cup, cherry limeade ♪
779
00:38:48,244 --> 00:38:50,330
♪ So much food
It's like a buffet ♪
780
00:38:50,330 --> 00:38:52,957
♪ I got next
I'm the king of spades ♪
781
00:38:52,957 --> 00:38:55,335
♪ Little kids
Dress up real silly ♪
782
00:38:56,211 --> 00:38:57,212
[blowing nose]
783
00:38:59,798 --> 00:39:02,550
Now let's find those punks
who stole my belt.
784
00:39:03,343 --> 00:39:05,637
♪ All I really want
Really want for Christmas ♪
785
00:39:05,637 --> 00:39:07,680
♪ Is everything
On my list, baby, hey ♪
786
00:39:12,727 --> 00:39:13,853
[jolly music playing]
787
00:39:18,441 --> 00:39:22,362
[laughs] Oh.
This is some swanky
villain hideout.
788
00:39:22,362 --> 00:39:24,114
What do you think
is in the vats?
789
00:39:24,114 --> 00:39:26,533
Probably us.
We had one job and we blew it.
790
00:39:26,533 --> 00:39:28,952
Now we've got to meet
the boss empty handed.
791
00:39:29,786 --> 00:39:31,830
We are in so much trouble.
792
00:39:31,830 --> 00:39:34,916
Relax. We're not
completely empty handed.
793
00:39:34,916 --> 00:39:36,292
Let me do the talking.
794
00:39:36,292 --> 00:39:38,044
[laughter nearby]
795
00:39:40,421 --> 00:39:42,715
On second thoughts,
you do the talking.
796
00:39:46,719 --> 00:39:49,472
Hello, sir. You in here?
797
00:39:49,472 --> 00:39:54,144
My associate and I were
just saying what
a lovely hideout you...
798
00:39:57,021 --> 00:39:59,232
have... here.
799
00:40:00,608 --> 00:40:01,568
- [horn blares]
- [both scream]
800
00:40:01,568 --> 00:40:02,610
[Joker laughs maniacally]
801
00:40:04,863 --> 00:40:10,493
Well, if it isn't my two
favorite new henchmen,
Roscoe and Whatchamacallit.
802
00:40:11,369 --> 00:40:14,414
Um... she's Francine, and I'm--
803
00:40:14,414 --> 00:40:17,292
Good evening, Mr. Joker, sir.
804
00:40:17,292 --> 00:40:20,170
You two are looking
a little worse for wear.
805
00:40:20,170 --> 00:40:24,465
Hopefully that's a sign
you did your part
in my a master plan for Gotham.
806
00:40:24,465 --> 00:40:28,344
Oh, how I want to make this
a very special Christmas Eve.
807
00:40:28,344 --> 00:40:30,638
Oh, yeah, we had a blast.
808
00:40:30,638 --> 00:40:32,640
You should have seen
this one bloke, he was like--
809
00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:35,643
I'm sorry if I gave
the impression I cared.
810
00:40:35,643 --> 00:40:38,605
Now then,
what do you got for me?
811
00:40:38,605 --> 00:40:42,233
Oh, what do we got?
Oh, sure, uh...
812
00:40:42,233 --> 00:40:43,943
Why don't you go ahead
and do that, Terry,
813
00:40:43,943 --> 00:40:45,278
since you're kind of
spearheading that?
814
00:40:45,278 --> 00:40:48,156
No, no, you do the honors, Francine.
815
00:40:48,156 --> 00:40:49,616
You do it.
816
00:40:49,616 --> 00:40:51,201
It wasn't me who lost the loot.
817
00:40:51,201 --> 00:40:53,995
I wouldn't have
dropped the loot
if you'd driven straight
818
00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:56,206
instead of being scared by
a two-year-old.
819
00:40:56,206 --> 00:40:57,248
He was at least
four and a half.
820
00:40:57,248 --> 00:40:59,918
Just give it to me.
Gimme, gimme, gimme!
821
00:40:59,918 --> 00:41:02,253
Gimme, gimme, gimme,
gimme, gimme, gimme.
822
00:41:02,253 --> 00:41:04,756
Uh... here you go, boss.
823
00:41:08,426 --> 00:41:09,469
[Joker] What's happening here?
824
00:41:10,303 --> 00:41:11,137
Where's the rest?
825
00:41:11,137 --> 00:41:15,058
That, actually, is the rest,
Mr. Joker. Sir.
826
00:41:15,058 --> 00:41:18,186
You've been out all day
and you just bring me this?
827
00:41:18,186 --> 00:41:19,729
[sighs]
828
00:41:20,563 --> 00:41:23,358
{\an8}Of all the elves I had
do my Christmas bidding,
829
00:41:23,358 --> 00:41:26,653
{\an8}I gave you two
the poshest neighborhood.
830
00:41:26,653 --> 00:41:29,072
We had more. Lots more.
831
00:41:29,072 --> 00:41:33,993
But then we ran into
a number of unforeseen,
unfortunate--
832
00:41:33,993 --> 00:41:34,911
It was Batman.
833
00:41:34,911 --> 00:41:38,998
Batman? Impossible.
I tricked him into
leaving Gotham.
834
00:41:38,998 --> 00:41:42,585
Oh, even after
all these years apart,
he still ruins everything.
835
00:41:42,585 --> 00:41:46,506
How can he be everywhere
at the same time?
All at once, all the time?
836
00:41:46,506 --> 00:41:48,466
I'm so sick
of these Batman games.
837
00:41:50,468 --> 00:41:52,679
No, it was a little Batman.
838
00:41:54,013 --> 00:41:55,390
Little Batman?
839
00:41:55,390 --> 00:41:57,475
What, did he shrink
or something? Hm?
840
00:41:57,475 --> 00:42:00,270
What Terry is trying
to say is--
841
00:42:00,270 --> 00:42:02,563
So, there was this little kid
dressed up as Batman.
842
00:42:02,563 --> 00:42:05,566
He beat the crud out of us
in a surprisingly
skillful manner.
843
00:42:06,734 --> 00:42:08,736
[Francine] And it was all
because of that belt.
844
00:42:09,570 --> 00:42:11,823
He went berserk for it.
845
00:42:17,745 --> 00:42:18,663
[squeals]
846
00:42:18,663 --> 00:42:19,914
So, let me get this straight.
847
00:42:19,914 --> 00:42:22,917
You're telling me
you two were beat by
a child in a...
848
00:42:22,917 --> 00:42:24,919
{\an8}[yells] Batman costume?
849
00:42:24,919 --> 00:42:28,506
[whimpers] More like PJs
and a paper-bag mask.
850
00:42:28,506 --> 00:42:30,174
There you go. See for yourself.
851
00:42:32,260 --> 00:42:33,678
[Terry]
I'm afraid of the dark.
852
00:42:33,678 --> 00:42:35,763
- What was that?
- What's going on?
853
00:42:35,763 --> 00:42:37,181
[both scream]
854
00:42:39,017 --> 00:42:42,020
Ooh, my. Look at that
little hellion go.
855
00:42:42,020 --> 00:42:44,314
And such rad ninja skills.
856
00:42:44,314 --> 00:42:45,606
[both scream on video]
857
00:42:45,606 --> 00:42:48,943
Whoa! Was that a grease fire?
So clever.
858
00:42:48,943 --> 00:42:52,613
How do you rewind this thing?
Okay, okay, here it is.
859
00:42:52,613 --> 00:42:53,990
[laughs]
860
00:42:53,990 --> 00:42:57,285
Oh, he really fried you
like a couple of
chicken fingers.
861
00:42:57,285 --> 00:43:00,079
[laughs] Okay, okay.
One more time.
862
00:43:00,079 --> 00:43:01,789
[laughing maniacally]
863
00:43:05,918 --> 00:43:08,046
This child is sensational.
864
00:43:08,046 --> 00:43:10,673
[grunts]
Give me my belt.
865
00:43:10,673 --> 00:43:13,259
I was only planning
to steal Christmas.
866
00:43:13,259 --> 00:43:16,512
But after watching
this kid's work,
it's all so clear.
867
00:43:16,512 --> 00:43:19,057
Why would we just
steal Gotham's Christmas
868
00:43:19,057 --> 00:43:23,895
when it would be
so much more festive
to destroy it?
869
00:43:23,895 --> 00:43:25,063
And who better to do it
870
00:43:25,063 --> 00:43:29,984
than a merry little Batman?
871
00:43:29,984 --> 00:43:31,027
[laughs maniacally]
872
00:43:34,197 --> 00:43:35,198
[clock chiming]
873
00:43:39,911 --> 00:43:41,454
What do you have in mind, boss?
874
00:43:42,205 --> 00:43:43,164
Are you still here?
875
00:43:44,123 --> 00:43:45,958
[both scream]
876
00:43:49,128 --> 00:43:50,671
[Terry] Can I at least
have my phone?
877
00:43:56,469 --> 00:43:59,555
Give me my belt.
878
00:43:59,555 --> 00:44:03,267
My, how the little cherub
wants his toy belt back.
879
00:44:03,267 --> 00:44:04,477
[laughs]
880
00:44:06,646 --> 00:44:08,398
[Poison Ivy] Did I miss
all the fun?
881
00:44:08,398 --> 00:44:11,609
No. In fact, thanks
to this stocking stuffer,
882
00:44:11,609 --> 00:44:13,152
the real fun is about to begin.
883
00:44:13,986 --> 00:44:16,489
[Poison Ivy] Sounds divine.
884
00:44:16,489 --> 00:44:18,074
[laughs]
885
00:44:19,200 --> 00:44:23,913
Now, if I were a kid
looking for my toy,
where would I look?
886
00:44:23,913 --> 00:44:25,164
Hm.
887
00:44:25,164 --> 00:44:26,707
[gasps] Of course.
888
00:44:26,707 --> 00:44:28,209
[laughs]
889
00:44:28,209 --> 00:44:31,838
{\an8}Or should I say, "Ho, ho, ho."
890
00:44:42,598 --> 00:44:45,601
Looking for those scum this way
is taking too long.
891
00:44:45,601 --> 00:44:48,396
Bat-Dad, don't you have
some kind of secret
surveillance system?
892
00:44:48,396 --> 00:44:50,690
You know, one that can
tap into everyone's cell phones
893
00:44:50,690 --> 00:44:52,066
and give us eyes everywhere?
894
00:44:52,066 --> 00:44:53,860
[Bat-Dad] Aha. I'm sorry.
895
00:44:53,860 --> 00:44:56,946
That would be
an egregious violation
of basic privacy.
896
00:44:56,946 --> 00:45:00,116
No one should be allowed
to have eyes and ears everywhere.
897
00:45:00,116 --> 00:45:03,744
{\an8}Lucky for us,
someone already does.
898
00:45:08,624 --> 00:45:10,418
Santa Claus.
899
00:45:10,418 --> 00:45:12,962
You should get a picture.
Alfred would love that.
900
00:45:12,962 --> 00:45:16,048
No pictures, only justice.
901
00:45:18,718 --> 00:45:22,388
[Batman] Oh, man,
I'm the worst dad ever.
902
00:45:22,388 --> 00:45:25,433
And I'm not racking up
any superhero points, either.
903
00:45:25,433 --> 00:45:29,604
[scoffs] Anomaly.
Come on, Bruce.
Walked right into that one.
904
00:45:29,604 --> 00:45:32,231
I mean, this is textbook
supervillain stuff.
905
00:45:32,231 --> 00:45:35,151
Step one, get Batman
out of town.
906
00:45:35,151 --> 00:45:39,280
Step two, unleash an evil plot
and threaten Gotham
and all its people.
907
00:45:39,989 --> 00:45:41,574
All its people...
908
00:45:41,574 --> 00:45:46,746
Damian! Great, like that kid
doesn't find a way
to find trouble on his own.
909
00:45:47,330 --> 00:45:50,500
I mean, by now he probably...
910
00:45:50,500 --> 00:45:52,084
- [sirens wailing]
- [indistinct radio chatter]
911
00:45:52,084 --> 00:45:53,920
[Damian] Dad, help me.
912
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:56,005
Dad, I need you.
913
00:45:56,005 --> 00:45:59,050
Damian! I'll see you
in the Promised Land.
914
00:46:00,259 --> 00:46:01,594
Alfred, no...
915
00:46:02,762 --> 00:46:03,763
Ahh, no!
916
00:46:05,056 --> 00:46:06,432
Don't go there.
917
00:46:06,432 --> 00:46:08,935
Remember what
your therapist said
about your brooding?
918
00:46:08,935 --> 00:46:11,687
Just focus
on the repair, Brucey.
919
00:46:12,688 --> 00:46:14,190
Let's see what we got.
920
00:46:16,234 --> 00:46:18,361
Yep, that's what I thought.
921
00:46:19,153 --> 00:46:20,196
Freeze.
922
00:46:23,074 --> 00:46:24,534
[festive Spanish song playing]
923
00:46:34,252 --> 00:46:35,753
Whoa!
924
00:46:42,718 --> 00:46:44,679
Look at all these toys.
925
00:46:49,433 --> 00:46:51,102
[laughs]
926
00:46:52,645 --> 00:46:55,439
[giggles]
Happy holidays.
927
00:47:00,444 --> 00:47:03,531
- Donut eat it all at once.
- [both laugh]
928
00:47:03,531 --> 00:47:04,991
[laughs]
929
00:47:04,991 --> 00:47:06,033
Donuts.
930
00:47:09,620 --> 00:47:13,666
{\an8}Focus on the belt.
I am the night.
I am the night.
931
00:47:17,211 --> 00:47:19,130
Excuse me, citizen of Gotham.
932
00:47:19,130 --> 00:47:22,592
Uh-oh. Looks like
someone got their holidays
mixed up.
933
00:47:22,592 --> 00:47:24,135
It's not Halloween, silly.
934
00:47:24,135 --> 00:47:26,137
Santa Claus. Where is he?
935
00:47:26,137 --> 00:47:29,599
Why, jolly old St. Nick's
up in his North Pole workshop,
of course.
936
00:47:29,599 --> 00:47:31,017
Located in our toy department.
937
00:47:33,811 --> 00:47:35,813
The escalators
are right over there.
938
00:47:36,981 --> 00:47:38,024
[gasps]
939
00:47:45,489 --> 00:47:47,158
Thank you. Merry Christmas.
940
00:47:47,867 --> 00:47:49,118
[gasps]
941
00:47:52,538 --> 00:47:55,166
It's your turn, little bat boy.
942
00:47:56,042 --> 00:47:58,127
Whoo-hoo, Santa!
943
00:47:59,962 --> 00:48:02,548
I don't have time
to get into anything
on my Christmas list.
944
00:48:02,548 --> 00:48:06,302
Like a new pair of
titanium Bat-cuffs
or some Bat-Cloaking gear,
945
00:48:06,302 --> 00:48:08,721
or this really cool pneumatic
Bat-Grenade launcher
946
00:48:08,721 --> 00:48:09,805
that comes with the laser scope
947
00:48:09,805 --> 00:48:11,515
and the glow-in-the-dark
Bat-symbols.
948
00:48:17,813 --> 00:48:18,731
[clears throat]
949
00:48:18,731 --> 00:48:20,566
[in deep voice]
I need information, Santa.
950
00:48:23,444 --> 00:48:24,779
Wait a minute.
951
00:48:25,571 --> 00:48:27,031
You're not Santa.
952
00:48:27,031 --> 00:48:28,032
Sure, he is.
953
00:48:30,534 --> 00:48:31,702
Hello.
954
00:48:31,702 --> 00:48:37,124
How else could he possibly
know what you really
want for Christmas?
955
00:48:37,875 --> 00:48:39,001
[gasps]
956
00:48:39,001 --> 00:48:40,795
Wait. How did you...
957
00:48:40,795 --> 00:48:42,296
[laughs]
958
00:48:42,296 --> 00:48:43,673
Poison Ivy!
959
00:48:44,590 --> 00:48:48,260
And you must be... Bane.
960
00:48:48,260 --> 00:48:50,930
Come get your little belt,
Bat-Mite.
961
00:48:51,764 --> 00:48:53,391
Give me that back.
962
00:48:56,185 --> 00:48:57,186
[groans]
963
00:48:57,978 --> 00:48:58,979
[Damian grunts]
964
00:49:01,315 --> 00:49:02,983
[laughing maniacally]
965
00:49:02,983 --> 00:49:04,985
[people screaming]
966
00:49:07,279 --> 00:49:08,114
Terrific.
967
00:49:09,490 --> 00:49:12,284
[Bat-Dad] Observation.
The collateral damage
you are causing
968
00:49:12,284 --> 00:49:13,285
is putting you and others--
969
00:49:13,285 --> 00:49:15,121
I can't stop now.
If I get my belt back,
970
00:49:15,121 --> 00:49:17,581
I'll prove that
I'm ready to be a superhero.
971
00:49:17,581 --> 00:49:18,958
[grunts]
972
00:49:25,005 --> 00:49:27,174
Huh. [growls]
973
00:49:31,178 --> 00:49:32,763
Works every time.
974
00:49:33,305 --> 00:49:34,140
Whoa!
975
00:49:35,933 --> 00:49:38,602
I picked something up for you
in the garden section.
976
00:49:40,438 --> 00:49:41,689
[screams]
977
00:49:43,399 --> 00:49:44,233
My foliage.
978
00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:47,611
Finally.
979
00:49:53,242 --> 00:49:54,493
[Bane grunting]
980
00:49:55,411 --> 00:49:58,038
Not yet.
Remember what Joker said.
981
00:49:58,038 --> 00:50:01,834
We have to let
the little disaster artist
work his magic first.
982
00:50:03,753 --> 00:50:05,004
[Damian screams]
983
00:50:06,881 --> 00:50:07,882
[straining]
984
00:50:09,425 --> 00:50:10,551
No!
985
00:50:14,305 --> 00:50:16,056
Why... does... Santa...
986
00:50:16,056 --> 00:50:17,933
need so many... reindeer?
987
00:50:22,354 --> 00:50:24,356
[gasps, screams]
988
00:50:25,524 --> 00:50:26,609
Whoa, whoa!
989
00:50:32,698 --> 00:50:34,158
[laughs wearily]
990
00:50:34,158 --> 00:50:35,951
[grunting]
991
00:50:38,746 --> 00:50:39,747
- [all gasping]
- [man 1] What's going on?
992
00:50:39,747 --> 00:50:41,999
- [woman 1] You okay, kid?
- [woman 2] It's a freaking bat.
993
00:50:41,999 --> 00:50:45,002
It's okay, citizens.
I... I'm a super...
994
00:50:45,002 --> 00:50:46,295
[tree creaking]
995
00:50:53,719 --> 00:50:54,887
Oh, no.
996
00:50:55,846 --> 00:50:57,515
[crowd clamoring]
997
00:51:01,352 --> 00:51:02,353
[grunts]
998
00:51:07,274 --> 00:51:08,317
[man 2] Hey, watch it.
999
00:51:15,991 --> 00:51:17,535
[laughing maniacally]
1000
00:51:18,160 --> 00:51:19,578
[grunts]
1001
00:51:22,915 --> 00:51:23,833
[panting]
1002
00:51:32,424 --> 00:51:35,845
{\an8}Bat-Dad, bring up directions
to the Gotham Zoo.
1003
00:51:35,845 --> 00:51:37,012
{\an8}Moments ago,
1004
00:51:37,012 --> 00:51:39,682
{\an8}a tiny, masked figure
single handedly perpetrated
1005
00:51:39,682 --> 00:51:44,186
{\an8}the most odious act
of yuletide vandalism
this city has ever seen.
1006
00:51:44,186 --> 00:51:47,606
{\an8}I spoke to a concerned citizen
who had this to say.
1007
00:51:48,399 --> 00:51:50,359
{\an8}I'm concerned.
1008
00:51:50,359 --> 00:51:52,695
{\an8}Who was this
snack-sized scrooge?
1009
00:51:52,695 --> 00:51:55,406
{\an8}And why did he have to
ruin it for everybody?
1010
00:51:55,406 --> 00:51:57,533
{\an8}Those questions
remain unanswered.
1011
00:51:57,533 --> 00:52:00,953
{\an8}But this home grown Gothamite
will only say this:
1012
00:52:00,953 --> 00:52:03,706
Humbug to you,
you little menace.
1013
00:52:03,706 --> 00:52:07,710
Wherever you are,
it'll take more than
knocking down our tree
1014
00:52:07,710 --> 00:52:10,045
to ruin this city's
Christmas spirit.
1015
00:52:10,045 --> 00:52:13,215
Not mine. I love that tree.
[crying]
1016
00:52:14,174 --> 00:52:17,553
What a genius.
1017
00:52:17,553 --> 00:52:18,679
[laughs]
1018
00:52:19,805 --> 00:52:22,766
He's an absolute miniature
maestro of mayhem.
1019
00:52:22,766 --> 00:52:25,895
He's exceeded
my wildest expectations,
1020
00:52:25,895 --> 00:52:29,481
and he's playing into
my plan perfectly.
1021
00:52:29,481 --> 00:52:31,233
[phone ringing]
1022
00:52:33,068 --> 00:52:34,028
Talk to me.
1023
00:52:34,028 --> 00:52:36,655
The kid's belt
was delivered to the bird
as planned?
1024
00:52:36,655 --> 00:52:38,407
Fantastic.
1025
00:52:38,407 --> 00:52:42,369
I'm gonna bring a sleigh
full of Christmas chaos
to his next stop.
1026
00:52:42,369 --> 00:52:43,329
[laughing]
1027
00:52:47,583 --> 00:52:48,584
But, you know...
1028
00:52:49,919 --> 00:52:54,298
I'm curious to see
just how much more damage
our little dynamo could cause,
1029
00:52:54,298 --> 00:52:56,467
if properly motivated.
1030
00:52:58,177 --> 00:53:02,056
Yes, it's time
for the boy and I to tango.
1031
00:53:02,056 --> 00:53:03,807
[laughing maniacally]
1032
00:53:05,851 --> 00:53:07,186
- But...
- [muffled conversation]
1033
00:53:07,186 --> 00:53:08,687
Huh? I don't wanna waltz.
1034
00:53:08,687 --> 00:53:10,230
It's... it's an expression.
1035
00:53:10,230 --> 00:53:12,316
Never mind.
I wanna talk to the kid.
1036
00:53:15,402 --> 00:53:18,155
That does it.
I'm moving to Metropolis.
1037
00:53:28,916 --> 00:53:32,086
I know you're out here.
Show yourself.
1038
00:53:39,843 --> 00:53:40,678
Victor.
1039
00:53:41,929 --> 00:53:46,058
Tonight's forecast,
a freeze is coming.
1040
00:53:46,058 --> 00:53:48,644
[Batman] All these years,
you show up out of nowhere,
1041
00:53:48,644 --> 00:53:50,229
that's your opener?
1042
00:53:50,229 --> 00:53:54,316
What about,
"Tonight, hell freezes over?"
1043
00:53:54,316 --> 00:53:56,735
[Batman] Nope. Still lame.
1044
00:53:56,735 --> 00:53:58,988
Dang it. It sounded better
in my head.
1045
00:53:58,988 --> 00:54:00,531
Never mind that, Freeze.
1046
00:54:00,531 --> 00:54:02,157
Why was I lured out
to the middle--
1047
00:54:02,157 --> 00:54:03,742
Oh, wait, I got one.
1048
00:54:03,742 --> 00:54:06,912
Time for you
to get ice-creamed.
1049
00:54:25,222 --> 00:54:26,724
[Mr. Freeze screaming]
1050
00:54:28,183 --> 00:54:31,061
Answer me! Freeze!
Why did you bring me here?
1051
00:54:31,812 --> 00:54:32,730
[Mr. Freeze] Whoa.
1052
00:54:35,232 --> 00:54:36,358
[groans]
1053
00:54:37,359 --> 00:54:38,819
Haven't you figured it out?
1054
00:54:38,819 --> 00:54:42,322
We needed to get the Bat
out of Gotham.
1055
00:54:42,322 --> 00:54:47,911
However, it appears
a much smaller Bat
has taken its place.
1056
00:54:47,911 --> 00:54:49,413
- [gasps]
- [laughs]
1057
00:54:49,413 --> 00:54:50,622
[Batman] Damian!
1058
00:55:06,180 --> 00:55:08,348
We've looked everywhere.
1059
00:55:08,348 --> 00:55:11,268
There's no sign of that van
or my belt.
1060
00:55:12,061 --> 00:55:13,687
[Bat-Dad] Earlier,
you remarked on the need
1061
00:55:13,687 --> 00:55:15,898
to prove your readiness
to become a superhero.
1062
00:55:16,523 --> 00:55:17,524
Prove to whom?
1063
00:55:18,734 --> 00:55:19,777
To you.
1064
00:55:19,777 --> 00:55:22,696
Uh, not you, my dad.
1065
00:55:22,696 --> 00:55:24,406
So I am not dead.
1066
00:55:24,406 --> 00:55:26,700
That is certainly welcome news.
1067
00:55:26,700 --> 00:55:28,494
Sorry I didn't tell you sooner.
1068
00:55:28,494 --> 00:55:29,661
It is not your fault.
1069
00:55:29,661 --> 00:55:32,539
My central processing
made an erroneous assumption.
1070
00:55:34,500 --> 00:55:36,293
- Observation.
- What?
1071
00:55:36,293 --> 00:55:38,754
I may only be
a simulation of your father,
1072
00:55:38,754 --> 00:55:41,298
but after an analysis
of his cognitive patterns
1073
00:55:41,298 --> 00:55:43,801
in relation to your
current goal orientation,
1074
00:55:43,801 --> 00:55:46,428
I have determined
that the two do not align.
1075
00:55:46,428 --> 00:55:48,222
Wanna break that down, Bat-Dad?
1076
00:55:48,222 --> 00:55:51,475
Getting your belt back
won't prove anything
to your dad.
1077
00:55:52,893 --> 00:55:56,021
Maybe you think it won't,
but I know it will.
1078
00:55:56,021 --> 00:55:57,356
It has to.
1079
00:55:57,356 --> 00:56:00,818
Being Batman alongside my dad
is all I've ever wanted.
1080
00:56:00,818 --> 00:56:03,612
I have to show Dad
I can handle myself.
1081
00:56:03,612 --> 00:56:05,864
He worries way too much.
1082
00:56:05,864 --> 00:56:09,368
He still makes me wear floaties
in the bathtub.
1083
00:56:09,368 --> 00:56:12,204
I mean, come on.
I'm not a baby.
1084
00:56:12,204 --> 00:56:14,498
Indeed. You are not a baby.
1085
00:56:14,498 --> 00:56:17,084
You have been alive
for eight years.
1086
00:56:17,084 --> 00:56:18,794
And four days. [laughs]
1087
00:56:18,794 --> 00:56:21,463
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
1088
00:56:23,090 --> 00:56:24,258
I like this place.
1089
00:56:25,134 --> 00:56:28,929
My memory matrix recalls
visiting many times
with my parents.
1090
00:56:30,514 --> 00:56:31,932
I miss doing that with them.
1091
00:56:32,933 --> 00:56:34,476
Why did they stop taking--
1092
00:56:35,519 --> 00:56:37,729
Oh, right.
1093
00:56:37,729 --> 00:56:39,648
Yes, right.
1094
00:56:47,114 --> 00:56:47,948
[hoots]
1095
00:56:50,117 --> 00:56:54,079
It must have been really hard
to lose your mom and dad
when you were just a kid.
1096
00:56:55,956 --> 00:56:58,917
[Bat-Dad] Although the memories
are technically not mine,
1097
00:56:58,917 --> 00:57:00,794
it was very hard to be alone.
1098
00:57:01,670 --> 00:57:03,672
In fact, your father created me
1099
00:57:03,672 --> 00:57:08,385
in part to ensure
you would never know
a loneliness like that.
1100
00:57:08,385 --> 00:57:09,928
Wow, he did?
1101
00:57:13,140 --> 00:57:15,601
Hey, Bat-Dad, observation.
1102
00:57:15,601 --> 00:57:17,186
Yes, Damian?
1103
00:57:18,270 --> 00:57:19,438
I'm glad he did.
1104
00:57:20,063 --> 00:57:21,690
I wouldn't want to be alone
right now.
1105
00:57:22,274 --> 00:57:23,775
I'm glad I am here, too.
1106
00:57:24,902 --> 00:57:26,486
You're a good friend, Bat-Dad.
1107
00:57:27,070 --> 00:57:30,115
I'd give you a big hug
if I wasn't, you know,
1108
00:57:30,115 --> 00:57:31,450
wearing you.
1109
00:57:31,450 --> 00:57:32,534
It's okay.
1110
00:57:32,534 --> 00:57:36,079
Just promise to give one
to your father
when you next see him.
1111
00:57:36,997 --> 00:57:39,625
Yeah, I kind of owe him
one anyway.
1112
00:57:41,919 --> 00:57:42,753
What the--
1113
00:57:47,174 --> 00:57:48,342
Whoo-hoo!
1114
00:57:48,342 --> 00:57:49,259
[laughing]
1115
00:57:51,553 --> 00:57:54,014
[Bat-Dad] Caution.
I'm detecting thin ice.
1116
00:57:54,932 --> 00:57:55,849
[Damian screaming]
1117
00:58:07,694 --> 00:58:08,528
[grunts]
1118
00:58:11,198 --> 00:58:15,077
[Bat-Dad] My environmental
assessment system
indicates this may be a trap.
1119
00:58:15,077 --> 00:58:17,621
I was thinking the same thing,
Bat-Dad.
1120
00:58:23,293 --> 00:58:25,254
{\an8}- [Bat-Dad] Oswald Cobblepot.
- Oswald Cobblepot.
1121
00:58:25,254 --> 00:58:28,048
I prefer The Penguin.
1122
00:58:29,007 --> 00:58:31,343
You have my belt, Birdbrain.
1123
00:58:31,343 --> 00:58:36,181
My, my. He said
you were an obnoxious
little brat.
1124
00:58:36,181 --> 00:58:37,182
Who said that?
1125
00:58:37,182 --> 00:58:38,225
[Joker laughing]
1126
00:58:40,602 --> 00:58:42,187
Come now, Oswald.
1127
00:58:42,187 --> 00:58:45,065
I never used
those words exactly.
1128
00:58:45,065 --> 00:58:46,400
Joker!
1129
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:49,152
Oh, he may be obnoxious,
and he certainly acts
like a brat,
1130
00:58:49,152 --> 00:58:51,530
but I never called him--
What was the last one?
1131
00:58:52,572 --> 00:58:53,532
Oh, it'll come to me.
1132
00:58:53,532 --> 00:58:55,367
What do you want, Joker?
1133
00:58:55,367 --> 00:58:58,704
Oh, you know your Uncle Joker.
Always stirring the pot.
1134
00:58:58,704 --> 00:59:00,497
[laughing]
1135
00:59:00,497 --> 00:59:01,665
Now listen carefully.
1136
00:59:01,665 --> 00:59:05,085
You will never
get your belt back.
1137
00:59:05,085 --> 00:59:07,087
[laughs maniacally]
1138
00:59:07,087 --> 00:59:10,340
[Bat-Dad] Caution.
Joker is a master manipulator.
1139
00:59:10,340 --> 00:59:14,177
Never ever, ever, ever,
ever, ever, get it back.
1140
00:59:14,761 --> 00:59:16,263
Oh, yes, I will.
1141
00:59:16,263 --> 00:59:17,931
{\an8}-Will not.
- Will too.
1142
00:59:17,931 --> 00:59:19,516
- Will not.
- Will too.
1143
00:59:19,516 --> 00:59:21,518
Will not infinity.
And don't say
infinity plus one,
1144
00:59:21,518 --> 00:59:22,602
because I can do this all day.
1145
00:59:22,602 --> 00:59:24,688
Six weeks is his record.
1146
00:59:24,688 --> 00:59:28,859
And do you know
how I can be so sure
you'll never get it back?
1147
00:59:28,859 --> 00:59:32,571
Because it is so clear to me,
and to everyone,
1148
00:59:32,571 --> 00:59:36,908
that you simply don't have
what it takes
to be a superhero.
1149
00:59:36,908 --> 00:59:38,035
[gasps]
1150
00:59:38,744 --> 00:59:39,995
I mean, look at your belt.
1151
00:59:39,995 --> 00:59:41,872
It's right there,
1152
00:59:41,872 --> 00:59:44,875
but I bet you couldn't
even snatch it
from old Penguin here.
1153
00:59:44,875 --> 00:59:48,253
Weak, old, pathetic,
enfeebled, incontinent--
1154
00:59:48,253 --> 00:59:49,171
[The Penguin] Hey!
1155
00:59:49,171 --> 00:59:52,758
{\an8}Oh, yeah?
Give me back my belt.
1156
00:59:52,758 --> 00:59:53,842
Whoa! Easy, kid.
1157
00:59:53,842 --> 00:59:55,635
You heard the clown.
I'm enfeebled.
1158
00:59:55,635 --> 00:59:58,138
Now, that's proper motivation.
1159
00:59:58,263 --> 00:59:59,389
My work here is done.
1160
00:59:59,389 --> 01:00:01,224
This plan better work.
1161
01:00:01,224 --> 01:00:02,642
{\an8}All right, pipsqueak.
1162
01:00:02,642 --> 01:00:04,144
Come and get it.
1163
01:00:05,270 --> 01:00:06,605
[The Penguin laughs]
1164
01:00:06,605 --> 01:00:07,522
[both grunting]
1165
01:00:11,485 --> 01:00:12,652
[grunting]
1166
01:00:13,403 --> 01:00:14,696
Yeah!
1167
01:00:19,242 --> 01:00:20,160
[straining]
1168
01:00:22,287 --> 01:00:23,497
- [The Penguin grunts]
- [groans]
1169
01:00:24,289 --> 01:00:25,832
[laughs]
1170
01:00:27,000 --> 01:00:28,585
[groaning]
1171
01:00:31,296 --> 01:00:33,173
[Bat-Dad groans] Warning.
1172
01:00:33,173 --> 01:00:35,592
Core processing unit damaged.
1173
01:00:35,592 --> 01:00:38,011
So long, Bat-Brat. [laughs]
1174
01:00:40,430 --> 01:00:42,432
[festive music playing]
1175
01:00:45,936 --> 01:00:48,438
Merry Christmas, Gotham.
1176
01:00:49,314 --> 01:00:50,357
[crowd gasps]
1177
01:00:50,357 --> 01:00:51,608
[laughs]
1178
01:00:51,608 --> 01:00:53,276
Now, look at that.
1179
01:00:53,276 --> 01:00:54,778
My ride's here.
1180
01:00:54,778 --> 01:00:57,030
Toodle-oo. [laughs]
1181
01:00:57,030 --> 01:00:59,282
{\an8}This ends now.
1182
01:00:59,282 --> 01:01:01,868
[Bat-Dad] Warning.
The damage I sustained
1183
01:01:01,868 --> 01:01:03,954
has compromised
the suit's integrity.
1184
01:01:03,954 --> 01:01:07,874
Adjusting to compression
at this altitude will bring
power below critical level.
1185
01:01:07,874 --> 01:01:09,459
[Damian] Hang on.
We're almost there.
1186
01:01:11,002 --> 01:01:12,712
Got room for one more?
1187
01:01:12,712 --> 01:01:14,923
Huh? For such a little kid,
1188
01:01:14,923 --> 01:01:17,426
you sure are a pain
in the neck.
1189
01:01:17,426 --> 01:01:19,636
- [The Penguin laughs]
- [Damian] Whoa.
1190
01:01:19,636 --> 01:01:21,388
Whoa, whoa.
1191
01:01:21,388 --> 01:01:23,223
[screaming]
1192
01:01:23,223 --> 01:01:24,724
[The Penguin] 23 skidoo.
1193
01:01:25,350 --> 01:01:27,227
I bid you adieu.
1194
01:01:27,227 --> 01:01:28,311
[grunts]
1195
01:01:28,311 --> 01:01:31,148
[Damian grunting]
1196
01:01:35,402 --> 01:01:38,280
What? He's a freak
of nature.
1197
01:01:46,830 --> 01:01:47,873
[crowd screaming]
1198
01:01:54,171 --> 01:01:55,672
[Damian] Whoa!
1199
01:01:56,548 --> 01:01:58,675
[Bat-Dad] Warning.
Power levels
below critical.
1200
01:02:02,220 --> 01:02:03,221
[laughs]
1201
01:02:04,264 --> 01:02:05,265
[yells]
1202
01:02:05,265 --> 01:02:06,766
[both grunting]
1203
01:02:06,766 --> 01:02:09,269
Let go, kid.
You'll kill us both.
1204
01:02:09,269 --> 01:02:10,770
Give it to me! Give it to me!
1205
01:02:10,770 --> 01:02:11,771
Give it to me!
1206
01:02:11,771 --> 01:02:14,900
{\an8}Fine. Take it.
I hope it was worth it.
1207
01:02:15,442 --> 01:02:17,110
- [The Penguin laughs]
- [Damian screams]
1208
01:02:20,947 --> 01:02:23,116
No! [gasps]
1209
01:02:24,034 --> 01:02:25,952
What do I do? What do I do?
1210
01:02:25,952 --> 01:02:28,413
[Bat-Dad] Solution.
Diverting remaining power
1211
01:02:28,413 --> 01:02:30,540
to my inflation systems
will break your fall.
1212
01:02:30,540 --> 01:02:32,125
{\an8}But what will happen to you?
1213
01:02:32,959 --> 01:02:34,085
I am sorry, Damian.
1214
01:02:34,878 --> 01:02:36,296
I will not survive.
1215
01:02:36,296 --> 01:02:37,797
No, you can't.
1216
01:02:37,797 --> 01:02:39,466
I'm sorry.
I should have listened.
1217
01:02:39,466 --> 01:02:40,884
You were right
about The Penguin.
1218
01:02:40,884 --> 01:02:42,093
About everything.
1219
01:02:42,093 --> 01:02:43,887
Please, no!
1220
01:02:43,887 --> 01:02:45,472
It's okay, Damian.
1221
01:02:45,472 --> 01:02:50,310
Remember, an important quality
every good hero must possess
1222
01:02:50,310 --> 01:02:52,395
is the willingness
to make sacrifice.
1223
01:02:52,395 --> 01:02:54,648
Bat-Dad, no!
1224
01:02:54,648 --> 01:02:55,899
Bye, Damian.
1225
01:02:55,899 --> 01:02:59,236
Initiating emergency
inflation protocol
1226
01:02:59,236 --> 01:03:00,987
in three, two...
1227
01:03:00,987 --> 01:03:02,155
[Damian grunts]
1228
01:03:06,368 --> 01:03:07,827
[groaning]
1229
01:03:09,454 --> 01:03:10,580
Bat-Dad!
1230
01:03:10,580 --> 01:03:14,084
Damian, you will make
a great hero one day.
1231
01:03:14,084 --> 01:03:15,293
[sniffles]
1232
01:03:15,293 --> 01:03:17,587
Don't leave me.
1233
01:03:17,587 --> 01:03:20,924
[Bat-Dad] Before shut down.
I just want to thank you.
1234
01:03:21,967 --> 01:03:23,176
{\an8}For what?
1235
01:03:23,176 --> 01:03:25,971
Giving me warm memories
of my own.
1236
01:03:25,971 --> 01:03:27,055
[powering down]
1237
01:03:30,350 --> 01:03:31,935
[somber music playing]
1238
01:03:31,935 --> 01:03:33,436
Bat-Dad.
1239
01:03:33,436 --> 01:03:35,105
[crowd screaming]
1240
01:03:35,105 --> 01:03:36,898
[Gordon]
♪ Deck the halls with... ♪
1241
01:03:36,898 --> 01:03:38,191
Commissioner Gordon,
1242
01:03:38,191 --> 01:03:40,110
there's reports of mass
destruction downtown
1243
01:03:40,110 --> 01:03:42,195
and a crime wave
all across the city.
1244
01:03:42,195 --> 01:03:43,613
Calm down.
1245
01:03:43,613 --> 01:03:46,366
I've faced situations
more dire than this before.
1246
01:03:47,617 --> 01:03:49,286
- [suspenseful music playing]
- [sirens wailing]
1247
01:03:53,873 --> 01:03:55,083
I'll handle it.
1248
01:04:02,173 --> 01:04:05,552
♪ I'm so glad
We have the Bat-Signal ♪
1249
01:04:05,552 --> 01:04:06,928
♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪
1250
01:04:07,971 --> 01:04:09,180
[grunts]
1251
01:04:09,931 --> 01:04:11,391
[gasps]
1252
01:04:12,142 --> 01:04:13,727
[woman gasps]
The Bat-Signal.
1253
01:04:13,727 --> 01:04:15,228
They haven't turned
that on in years.
1254
01:04:15,228 --> 01:04:16,813
Crime is back in Gotham.
1255
01:04:16,813 --> 01:04:18,273
Run for your lives, everyone.
1256
01:04:18,273 --> 01:04:19,649
[man] We gotta get out of here.
1257
01:04:20,150 --> 01:04:21,735
Save yourselves.
1258
01:04:22,569 --> 01:04:24,112
Christmas is ruined!
1259
01:04:25,238 --> 01:04:26,489
Wait! Wait!
1260
01:04:30,076 --> 01:04:31,828
{\an8}Oh, biscuits.
1261
01:04:32,537 --> 01:04:33,413
[gasps]
1262
01:04:33,413 --> 01:04:34,748
Kid, you gotta get out of here.
1263
01:04:34,748 --> 01:04:36,166
Nothing is safe anymore.
1264
01:04:37,250 --> 01:04:38,335
- [grunts]
- [man] Hey!
1265
01:04:38,335 --> 01:04:39,586
[Damian] Wait, wait, no!
1266
01:04:40,545 --> 01:04:42,464
- [groans]
- [horn honks]
1267
01:04:42,464 --> 01:04:43,965
- [gasps]
- [tires screeching]
1268
01:04:45,592 --> 01:04:47,469
- [crowd screaming]
- [gasping]
1269
01:04:48,803 --> 01:04:49,971
Santa.
1270
01:04:49,971 --> 01:04:51,973
Oh, am I glad to see you.
1271
01:04:51,973 --> 01:04:55,685
Hey, that's the kid
who wrecked the parade.
1272
01:04:55,685 --> 01:04:57,312
Way to go, jerk.
1273
01:04:57,312 --> 01:04:59,230
You ruined Christmas.
1274
01:04:59,230 --> 01:05:00,732
Wait, I can explain.
1275
01:05:00,732 --> 01:05:03,568
I just wanted
to be a superhero.
1276
01:05:03,568 --> 01:05:06,154
- [man 1] Get back here.
- [man 2] He's gonna pay.
1277
01:05:06,946 --> 01:05:08,573
- [man 1] Where did he go?
- [man 2] Did you see him?
1278
01:05:17,248 --> 01:05:19,250
[whimpering]
1279
01:05:24,005 --> 01:05:25,965
Dad... [sniffles]
1280
01:05:25,965 --> 01:05:27,425
I wish you were here.
1281
01:05:29,219 --> 01:05:30,553
[distant whistling]
1282
01:05:35,934 --> 01:05:36,935
[gasps]
1283
01:05:43,274 --> 01:05:44,359
[gasps]
1284
01:05:48,113 --> 01:05:49,197
[panting]
1285
01:05:52,367 --> 01:05:53,284
[squeaking]
1286
01:05:58,957 --> 01:05:59,874
[whimpers]
1287
01:06:01,960 --> 01:06:03,002
[whimpers]
1288
01:06:04,379 --> 01:06:05,380
[bottles clinking]
1289
01:06:17,809 --> 01:06:19,144
[whimpers]
1290
01:06:25,984 --> 01:06:27,610
[straining]
1291
01:06:31,740 --> 01:06:32,657
[gasps]
1292
01:06:35,076 --> 01:06:36,244
[whimpering]
1293
01:06:37,120 --> 01:06:39,497
{\an8}I'm just a kid. Don't hurt me.
I'm just a kid.
1294
01:06:44,461 --> 01:06:46,755
Alfred, what are you
doing here?
1295
01:06:49,591 --> 01:06:50,508
Did you forget?
1296
01:06:51,134 --> 01:06:55,513
Your steaming mug
of my world-famous hot cocoa
with extra marshmallows.
1297
01:06:55,513 --> 01:06:59,976
Of course, that is,
unless you think cocoa
is kid stuff.
1298
01:06:59,976 --> 01:07:01,060
[gulping]
1299
01:07:03,062 --> 01:07:05,148
- Ah, there now, better?
- [exhales]
1300
01:07:05,148 --> 01:07:07,233
[siren wailing in distance]
1301
01:07:09,569 --> 01:07:11,571
[somber music playing]
1302
01:07:17,243 --> 01:07:19,162
I'm in deep trouble, aren't I?
1303
01:07:19,162 --> 01:07:22,499
Oh, yes, most definitely,
Master Wayne.
1304
01:07:22,499 --> 01:07:24,334
Yeah. I figured.
1305
01:07:28,963 --> 01:07:31,216
{\an8}I just wanted
to be Batman so bad.
1306
01:07:31,883 --> 01:07:34,803
{\an8}Maybe if Dad didn't treat me
like such baby...
1307
01:07:34,803 --> 01:07:37,013
Don't be so hard
on your father.
1308
01:07:37,013 --> 01:07:38,723
He can overdo it sometimes,
1309
01:07:38,723 --> 01:07:41,434
but that's because he's trying
to protect the one thing
1310
01:07:41,434 --> 01:07:43,311
you have that he never did.
1311
01:07:44,020 --> 01:07:45,438
A childhood.
1312
01:07:47,315 --> 01:07:49,984
[sighs] I'm no superhero.
1313
01:07:50,860 --> 01:07:53,822
I lost my belt.
I destroyed my Batsuit.
1314
01:07:53,822 --> 01:07:55,782
I have no idea
where I parked the bike.
1315
01:07:56,991 --> 01:07:58,827
I can't blame anyone but me.
1316
01:07:58,827 --> 01:08:02,080
Son, costumes and belts
aren't what make a superhero--
1317
01:08:02,080 --> 01:08:04,624
I'm sorry. Did you say
you misplaced the Batpod?
1318
01:08:05,917 --> 01:08:08,127
Um, never mind.
1319
01:08:08,753 --> 01:08:10,839
Damian, becoming Batman
1320
01:08:10,839 --> 01:08:14,300
takes precisely what
your father has been
attempting to teach you.
1321
01:08:14,300 --> 01:08:18,137
Focus, responsibility, sacrifice.
1322
01:08:18,137 --> 01:08:20,682
[sniffles] Don't forget
high pain threshold.
1323
01:08:20,682 --> 01:08:22,851
[chuckles] Indeed.
1324
01:08:23,560 --> 01:08:26,563
And while you may not be
a superhero yet, little one,
1325
01:08:26,563 --> 01:08:30,024
in my heart,
I know one day you will be.
1326
01:08:30,900 --> 01:08:31,776
Thanks, Alfred.
1327
01:08:32,402 --> 01:08:33,611
But of course, my boy.
1328
01:08:34,195 --> 01:08:35,738
Now, come along.
1329
01:08:35,738 --> 01:08:38,950
I'd say we had
enough excitement
for one Christmas Eve.
1330
01:08:38,950 --> 01:08:40,076
[suspenseful music playing]
1331
01:08:44,372 --> 01:08:45,790
[wind blowing]
1332
01:09:06,477 --> 01:09:08,313
"Dear Little Batman,
1333
01:09:08,313 --> 01:09:11,733
{\an8}you gave me the best
Christmas gift ever.
1334
01:09:11,733 --> 01:09:14,235
Let me return the favor"?
1335
01:09:14,235 --> 01:09:15,403
[gas hissing]
1336
01:09:16,321 --> 01:09:18,323
[Damian mumbling woozily]
1337
01:09:23,536 --> 01:09:25,079
[continues mumbling]
1338
01:09:27,540 --> 01:09:30,251
Alfred? Alfred!
1339
01:09:31,836 --> 01:09:33,254
Where am I?
1340
01:09:33,254 --> 01:09:34,505
[tense music playing]
1341
01:09:38,927 --> 01:09:39,761
[balloon pops]
1342
01:09:39,761 --> 01:09:41,596
[goop bubbling]
1343
01:09:41,596 --> 01:09:42,764
Joker.
1344
01:09:44,140 --> 01:09:46,184
[Joker]
♪ Jingle Bells
Batman smells ♪
1345
01:09:46,184 --> 01:09:48,144
♪ Robin laid an egg ♪
1346
01:09:48,144 --> 01:09:50,313
♪ The Batmobile
Lost its wheel ♪
1347
01:09:50,313 --> 01:09:52,607
♪ And the Joker got away ♪
1348
01:09:52,607 --> 01:09:54,567
[laughing mischievously]
1349
01:10:07,497 --> 01:10:09,791
- Snow?
- [Joker laughs]
1350
01:10:11,501 --> 01:10:12,502
[door thuds]
1351
01:10:14,253 --> 01:10:16,005
- Whoa, whoa!
- [rumbling]
1352
01:10:16,005 --> 01:10:17,382
What the...
1353
01:10:17,382 --> 01:10:18,716
[rumbling continues]
1354
01:10:20,134 --> 01:10:21,260
[gas hissing]
1355
01:10:37,819 --> 01:10:39,112
[metal clanks]
1356
01:10:42,281 --> 01:10:44,283
["Sweet Gingerbread Man"
playing over speakers]
1357
01:10:46,411 --> 01:10:50,081
♪ Fresh out of the pan
Sweet gingerbread man ♪
1358
01:10:52,291 --> 01:10:55,420
♪ I'm twirling a cane
Made of peppermint ♪
1359
01:10:56,170 --> 01:10:57,005
♪ Uh-huh ♪
1360
01:10:57,922 --> 01:10:58,798
♪ Uh-huh ♪
1361
01:10:59,799 --> 01:11:00,717
♪ Nice sticky hands... ♪
1362
01:11:00,717 --> 01:11:02,093
[both laughing]
1363
01:11:02,093 --> 01:11:05,138
Oh, he's here.
Don't just stand there.
1364
01:11:05,138 --> 01:11:06,806
It's nearly Christmas morning.
1365
01:11:06,806 --> 01:11:08,683
Come in, come in.
1366
01:11:10,143 --> 01:11:11,102
[objects clattering]
1367
01:11:12,687 --> 01:11:13,688
- [party horn toots]
- You made it.
1368
01:11:13,688 --> 01:11:15,106
[all laughing]
1369
01:11:15,940 --> 01:11:18,609
I am so sorry
the invite was so last minute.
1370
01:11:18,609 --> 01:11:20,778
What is this?
1371
01:11:20,778 --> 01:11:22,905
Uh, hello? Look around.
1372
01:11:22,905 --> 01:11:25,116
It's a Christmas party.
1373
01:11:25,742 --> 01:11:28,619
I don't know what you're up to,
but I'm taking you all in.
1374
01:11:28,619 --> 01:11:31,706
Oh, please. Still trying
the hero thing, are we?
1375
01:11:31,706 --> 01:11:34,500
Did we learn nothing
from tonight, young man?
1376
01:11:34,500 --> 01:11:35,501
Some people...
1377
01:11:35,501 --> 01:11:36,419
[coughs] ...you,
1378
01:11:36,419 --> 01:11:39,172
just aren't cut out
to be heroes.
1379
01:11:39,172 --> 01:11:40,923
Now, come enjoy the party.
1380
01:11:40,923 --> 01:11:45,136
Tonight, my boy,
we're celebrating
something very special.
1381
01:11:45,136 --> 01:11:48,848
Crime's triumphant return
to Gotham.
1382
01:11:48,848 --> 01:11:50,308
And what better way to do it
1383
01:11:50,308 --> 01:11:53,728
than by stealing
its Christmas.
1384
01:11:53,728 --> 01:11:55,605
{\an8}[laughing evilly]
1385
01:11:56,773 --> 01:11:58,357
This is where you say,
"Joker, you're mad.
1386
01:11:58,357 --> 01:12:00,193
Steal Christmas? But why?"
1387
01:12:01,652 --> 01:12:02,779
[in stoic voice]
Joker, you're mad.
1388
01:12:02,779 --> 01:12:04,113
Steal Christmas? But why?
1389
01:12:04,113 --> 01:12:06,240
It all goes back
to those glory days,
1390
01:12:06,240 --> 01:12:09,118
when my friends
and I would terrorize Gotham.
1391
01:12:09,118 --> 01:12:10,495
[bell ringing]
1392
01:12:11,662 --> 01:12:13,790
[guard] Hey, get back here!
After them!
1393
01:12:15,833 --> 01:12:18,086
You'll get yours
in the end, Joker.
1394
01:12:18,086 --> 01:12:20,671
- [all laughing]
- [Joker] Oh, how we'd laugh,
1395
01:12:20,671 --> 01:12:22,423
and laugh and laugh.
1396
01:12:25,510 --> 01:12:26,969
But then crime went away.
1397
01:12:27,720 --> 01:12:30,598
We were forced to... retire.
1398
01:12:30,598 --> 01:12:32,809
And as a result... [sniffles]
1399
01:12:32,809 --> 01:12:34,852
We drifted apart.
1400
01:12:35,812 --> 01:12:37,396
[Vicki]
Gotham City just voted
1401
01:12:37,396 --> 01:12:39,816
the safest place
on planet Earth.
1402
01:12:39,816 --> 01:12:41,901
[people cheering]
1403
01:12:42,568 --> 01:12:45,238
[Joker] Now, I always
thought the joy came
from committing crime.
1404
01:12:45,988 --> 01:12:50,910
Looking back, it was about
committing crime together.
1405
01:12:50,910 --> 01:12:51,911
[all laughing]
1406
01:12:51,911 --> 01:12:53,913
Aw, you big softie.
1407
01:12:53,913 --> 01:12:55,039
[in normal voice]
I don't understand.
1408
01:12:55,039 --> 01:12:57,291
What does any of this
have to do with me?
1409
01:12:57,291 --> 01:13:00,336
The moment I saw
the sheer mayhem
1410
01:13:00,336 --> 01:13:02,922
you were capable of,
I realized that with your help,
1411
01:13:02,922 --> 01:13:04,674
we could kick
this whole groovy caper
1412
01:13:04,674 --> 01:13:06,384
up a notch and a half.
1413
01:13:06,384 --> 01:13:09,137
- High five!
- I'd never help you.
1414
01:13:09,137 --> 01:13:10,388
But you already did.
1415
01:13:11,055 --> 01:13:13,891
Your chaotic bat-boobery
was a perfect distraction!
1416
01:13:13,891 --> 01:13:15,309
[blades whirring]
1417
01:13:15,309 --> 01:13:17,061
[Joker] While all eyes
were on you,
1418
01:13:17,061 --> 01:13:18,437
we nabbed Christmas
1419
01:13:18,437 --> 01:13:21,149
- from every home in Gotham.
- [tires screeching]
1420
01:13:21,149 --> 01:13:22,650
- [Bane laughing]
- [woman groaning]
1421
01:13:23,401 --> 01:13:25,069
[Poison Ivy laughs] Oh!
1422
01:13:25,695 --> 01:13:27,363
[The Penguin cackles]
1423
01:13:27,363 --> 01:13:28,865
[Poison Ivy laughs]
1424
01:13:28,865 --> 01:13:30,158
[Bane chuckles]
1425
01:13:33,411 --> 01:13:34,370
[penguin squawking]
1426
01:13:37,123 --> 01:13:39,292
[penguins squawking]
1427
01:13:40,084 --> 01:13:42,128
[Joker] We set out
to only steal Christmas,
1428
01:13:42,128 --> 01:13:43,671
but you... [giggles]
1429
01:13:43,671 --> 01:13:45,590
You destroyed it.
1430
01:13:47,425 --> 01:13:49,468
- [church bell tolling]
- And now, thanks to you,
1431
01:13:49,468 --> 01:13:53,014
everyone is waking up
to no Christmas.
1432
01:13:56,475 --> 01:13:59,145
I was just trying
to get my belt back.
1433
01:13:59,854 --> 01:14:02,940
And in the process of this
frankly, selfish pursuit,
1434
01:14:02,940 --> 01:14:05,651
you destroyed half the city.
1435
01:14:05,651 --> 01:14:08,738
Now that doesn't sound
much like a superhero to me.
1436
01:14:09,238 --> 01:14:11,657
In fact, it sounds more
like a super...
1437
01:14:12,950 --> 01:14:14,410
villain.
1438
01:14:14,410 --> 01:14:16,412
What? No. No, I'm not a--
1439
01:14:16,412 --> 01:14:17,538
Sure, you are.
1440
01:14:17,538 --> 01:14:19,665
Why do you think
I brought you here?
1441
01:14:19,665 --> 01:14:22,084
You're one of us, kid.
1442
01:14:22,084 --> 01:14:23,586
[Bane grunting]
1443
01:14:23,586 --> 01:14:25,755
We couldn't have
done it without you.
1444
01:14:25,755 --> 01:14:28,883
Yes. Thank you,
from the bottom
of our cold hearts.
1445
01:14:28,883 --> 01:14:31,510
[Joker] Thank you, indeed.
1446
01:14:31,510 --> 01:14:33,596
[all laughing]
1447
01:14:35,056 --> 01:14:36,182
I can't believe...
1448
01:14:37,308 --> 01:14:38,351
You're right.
1449
01:14:39,435 --> 01:14:42,188
Only a supervillain would
ruin Christmas.
1450
01:14:42,188 --> 01:14:43,231
[sniffling]
1451
01:14:43,856 --> 01:14:45,024
That's right.
1452
01:14:45,024 --> 01:14:46,901
To thank you
for your contribution,
1453
01:14:46,901 --> 01:14:51,197
we thought it'd be real swell
if we all chipped in
and got you something.
1454
01:14:56,118 --> 01:14:58,371
{\an8}My utility belt.
1455
01:14:58,371 --> 01:15:00,957
Your upgraded utility belt.
1456
01:15:00,957 --> 01:15:03,334
We replaced
all the useless safety gear
1457
01:15:03,334 --> 01:15:05,586
with more practical devices.
1458
01:15:05,586 --> 01:15:07,672
[Bane grunting]
1459
01:15:09,966 --> 01:15:11,342
Well said, Bane.
1460
01:15:11,926 --> 01:15:15,721
It's the perfect accessory
for supervillains.
1461
01:15:16,806 --> 01:15:19,225
Think of all you went through
to get that belt.
1462
01:15:19,892 --> 01:15:21,686
You earned it.
1463
01:15:22,395 --> 01:15:23,354
Take it.
1464
01:15:24,105 --> 01:15:27,024
[all chanting] Take the belt!
1465
01:15:27,024 --> 01:15:30,736
Take the belt! Take the belt!
1466
01:15:30,736 --> 01:15:32,238
Take the belt!
1467
01:15:32,238 --> 01:15:33,406
[chanting fades]
1468
01:15:36,200 --> 01:15:40,913
[Bruce] You must take my place
and become... the Batman.
1469
01:15:42,707 --> 01:15:45,293
[Alfred] Becoming Batman takes
precisely what your father
1470
01:15:45,293 --> 01:15:47,003
has been attempting
to teach you.
1471
01:15:50,423 --> 01:15:51,507
[Bruce] Give me the belt.
1472
01:15:51,507 --> 01:15:53,384
You're clearly
not ready for it.
1473
01:16:00,182 --> 01:16:01,600
There now.
1474
01:16:01,600 --> 01:16:05,187
{\an8}Doesn't it feel good
to get what you want?
1475
01:16:07,732 --> 01:16:09,567
{\an8}I guess you're right, Joker.
1476
01:16:09,567 --> 01:16:11,068
{\an8}I'm no superhero.
1477
01:16:12,570 --> 01:16:15,531
{\an8}But then again, I'm not
a supervillain, either.
1478
01:16:16,866 --> 01:16:20,202
See, Joker,
being a superhero takes focus,
1479
01:16:21,078 --> 01:16:22,538
responsibility...
1480
01:16:26,459 --> 01:16:27,918
{\an8}and sacrifice.
1481
01:16:28,627 --> 01:16:29,837
- [fire crackling]
- [Damian grunts]
1482
01:16:31,839 --> 01:16:32,673
[all shrieking]
1483
01:16:35,343 --> 01:16:36,761
[whooshing]
1484
01:16:38,304 --> 01:16:39,388
[clanks]
1485
01:16:39,388 --> 01:16:41,098
Holy crap!
1486
01:16:41,807 --> 01:16:44,560
All right. Which one of you
gave a little kid explosives?
1487
01:16:46,645 --> 01:16:48,564
It did seem like
a good idea at the time.
1488
01:16:55,946 --> 01:16:56,864
That's not good.
1489
01:17:05,122 --> 01:17:07,625
My snow globe! You broke it.
1490
01:17:07,625 --> 01:17:09,794
Now I'm gonna break you.
1491
01:17:09,794 --> 01:17:12,088
{\an8}You got it backwards,
clown face.
1492
01:17:12,088 --> 01:17:15,257
{\an8}I'm taking you down,
all of you.
1493
01:17:15,257 --> 01:17:18,761
{\an8}And I'm taking these presents
back to the kids of Gotham.
1494
01:17:18,761 --> 01:17:21,305
{\an8}I'm saving Christmas!
1495
01:17:21,305 --> 01:17:24,433
You ungrateful, little twerp.
1496
01:17:24,433 --> 01:17:27,186
I'm gonna chop you up
like sardines.
1497
01:17:28,145 --> 01:17:29,438
[Damian grunting]
1498
01:17:31,399 --> 01:17:32,775
[grunts]
1499
01:17:33,984 --> 01:17:34,819
[laughs]
1500
01:17:37,446 --> 01:17:38,989
- Hiyah!
- [Bane groans]
1501
01:17:40,074 --> 01:17:41,700
- Play ball!
- [Damian yells]
1502
01:17:43,244 --> 01:17:44,203
[groans]
1503
01:17:44,203 --> 01:17:46,038
[groaning]
1504
01:17:46,038 --> 01:17:47,039
[panting]
1505
01:17:47,039 --> 01:17:48,874
- [grunts]
- Crush him, Bane.
1506
01:17:48,874 --> 01:17:49,917
[Bane growling]
1507
01:17:55,047 --> 01:17:55,965
[Damian yells]
1508
01:17:57,133 --> 01:17:58,050
[yelling]
1509
01:18:01,929 --> 01:18:02,930
[Damian grunts]
1510
01:18:07,226 --> 01:18:10,396
All you had to do
was take the belt,
1511
01:18:10,396 --> 01:18:13,107
and now I'm gonna
take your head.
1512
01:18:13,691 --> 01:18:14,608
[card clangs]
1513
01:18:18,612 --> 01:18:19,447
[thuds]
1514
01:18:25,619 --> 01:18:29,707
Looks like you're
in a little trouble,
Little Batman.
1515
01:18:29,707 --> 01:18:31,459
- [The Penguin laughing]
- [Poison Ivy chuckles]
1516
01:18:31,459 --> 01:18:32,710
[all laughing]
1517
01:18:34,378 --> 01:18:35,546
[Damian grunts]
1518
01:18:35,546 --> 01:18:36,964
- [grunting]
- [The Penguin cackling]
1519
01:18:36,964 --> 01:18:40,217
No one poops
on my party and lives.
1520
01:18:40,217 --> 01:18:41,469
[all laughing]
1521
01:18:41,469 --> 01:18:42,803
Yes.
1522
01:18:44,180 --> 01:18:45,598
- [whooshing]
- What was that?
1523
01:18:48,601 --> 01:18:50,019
[whooshing]
1524
01:18:52,354 --> 01:18:53,272
[loud thud]
1525
01:18:54,023 --> 01:18:55,858
[Mr. Freeze mumbling]
1526
01:18:57,943 --> 01:18:59,153
[dramatic music playing]
1527
01:19:01,697 --> 01:19:02,531
[The Penguin gasps]
1528
01:19:04,450 --> 01:19:05,367
Dad!
1529
01:19:06,160 --> 01:19:08,037
[gasps] Thank goodness,
I found you.
1530
01:19:08,037 --> 01:19:10,956
Are you okay?
You have any boo-boos?
Are you hurt?
1531
01:19:11,916 --> 01:19:13,501
[chuckles] Dad, I'm fine.
1532
01:19:13,501 --> 01:19:15,503
[Joker] How very touching.
1533
01:19:16,504 --> 01:19:17,963
Stand back, son.
1534
01:19:17,963 --> 01:19:19,924
Why didn't you tell me
you were a father?
1535
01:19:19,924 --> 01:19:21,175
I thought we were friends.
1536
01:19:21,175 --> 01:19:23,093
I'm not your friend, Joker.
1537
01:19:23,093 --> 01:19:25,387
I gotta say, love the beard.
1538
01:19:25,387 --> 01:19:27,681
Really takes
the intimidation game
up a peg.
1539
01:19:27,681 --> 01:19:28,974
- Thanks.
- [Poison Ivy grunts]
1540
01:19:30,935 --> 01:19:32,269
[Joker grunts]
1541
01:19:32,269 --> 01:19:35,981
Looks like it's time to kill
two bats with one stone.
1542
01:19:37,608 --> 01:19:39,610
[grunts] Dad, I can do this.
1543
01:19:39,610 --> 01:19:42,154
Almost makes me miss my father.
1544
01:19:42,154 --> 01:19:45,449
But then I remember
how he dumped my bassinet
in the sewer!
1545
01:19:46,992 --> 01:19:48,410
[Bane growling]
1546
01:19:49,537 --> 01:19:50,996
Just leave him alone.
1547
01:19:50,996 --> 01:19:51,914
[Bane growling]
1548
01:19:54,124 --> 01:19:56,293
{\an8}Come on, I've been fighting
these guys all day.
1549
01:19:56,293 --> 01:19:57,795
Damian. I told you
to stay back.
1550
01:20:00,089 --> 01:20:01,215
Dad, listen to me. I can help.
1551
01:20:01,215 --> 01:20:03,717
I said no, Damian.
You're just a kid.
1552
01:20:03,717 --> 01:20:06,387
No, I'm not. I'm your kid, Dad.
1553
01:20:09,223 --> 01:20:10,391
[Joker cackling]
1554
01:20:15,479 --> 01:20:17,898
[in distorted voice] Dad!
1555
01:20:17,898 --> 01:20:18,816
[Bruce thuds on floor]
1556
01:20:22,987 --> 01:20:24,280
[ear ringing]
1557
01:20:25,447 --> 01:20:26,490
[The Penguin groans]
1558
01:20:26,490 --> 01:20:28,242
[groaning]
1559
01:20:29,743 --> 01:20:30,786
[Poison Ivy and Joker grunting]
1560
01:20:30,786 --> 01:20:32,830
{\an8}[muffled] Don't worry, Dad.
I'll protect you.
1561
01:20:32,830 --> 01:20:34,707
- Nobody hurts my dad.
- [Joker grunting]
1562
01:20:35,791 --> 01:20:36,750
- What?
- [Damian grunting]
1563
01:20:36,750 --> 01:20:37,835
Hiyah!
1564
01:20:38,586 --> 01:20:39,628
[yells]
1565
01:20:40,629 --> 01:20:43,757
- [grunts] Not so tough
without these, are you?
- [Bane grunting]
1566
01:20:45,050 --> 01:20:46,802
[all yelping]
1567
01:20:48,178 --> 01:20:49,388
[Damian grunts]
1568
01:20:50,472 --> 01:20:51,432
You okay, Dad?
1569
01:20:52,057 --> 01:20:54,768
He... he is my kid.
1570
01:20:55,436 --> 01:20:56,562
Batman is waking up.
1571
01:20:56,562 --> 01:20:57,521
[panting]
1572
01:20:57,521 --> 01:20:59,523
Leave my dad alone!
1573
01:20:59,523 --> 01:21:00,441
[Poison Ivy grunting]
1574
01:21:01,775 --> 01:21:05,279
Dude! Damian, rad ninja skills.
1575
01:21:05,279 --> 01:21:06,363
Thanks, Dad.
1576
01:21:07,823 --> 01:21:08,866
Where's the belt?
1577
01:21:09,867 --> 01:21:11,327
Long story.
1578
01:21:11,327 --> 01:21:12,328
Tell me later.
1579
01:21:12,328 --> 01:21:13,579
In the meantime...
1580
01:21:14,913 --> 01:21:15,748
Whoa!
1581
01:21:15,748 --> 01:21:17,499
Your utility belt?
1582
01:21:17,499 --> 01:21:18,584
Awesome!
1583
01:21:20,336 --> 01:21:22,171
Wait. What about you?
1584
01:21:22,171 --> 01:21:23,881
Always carry a spare.
1585
01:21:23,881 --> 01:21:25,382
Told you,
you had a lot to learn.
1586
01:21:26,175 --> 01:21:27,092
Now, what do you say?
1587
01:21:27,718 --> 01:21:28,969
You need a wingman?
1588
01:21:29,845 --> 01:21:32,931
{\an8}- More like a sidekick.
- [The Penguin grunting]
1589
01:21:34,475 --> 01:21:37,853
Allow me to break the ice,
Little Batman. [yells]
1590
01:21:37,853 --> 01:21:39,980
Come on, kiddo.
Let's finish this.
1591
01:21:41,190 --> 01:21:43,108
[screams, grunts]
1592
01:21:46,195 --> 01:21:47,780
[screaming, grunts]
1593
01:21:51,867 --> 01:21:54,787
This is the best
Christmas present ever.
1594
01:21:56,830 --> 01:21:58,290
Oh, no.
1595
01:21:58,290 --> 01:22:00,542
- [screams]
- [splashes]
1596
01:22:00,542 --> 01:22:02,211
[grunts, coughs]
1597
01:22:02,211 --> 01:22:03,379
[Bane growling]
1598
01:22:04,880 --> 01:22:06,215
My back!
1599
01:22:06,882 --> 01:22:09,176
[laughing] Hot enough for you?
1600
01:22:10,010 --> 01:22:11,345
Not even close.
1601
01:22:11,345 --> 01:22:12,388
[chuckles]
1602
01:22:12,388 --> 01:22:13,764
Where's the little one?
1603
01:22:13,764 --> 01:22:15,057
[engine revs]
1604
01:22:18,394 --> 01:22:20,604
No! [grunts]
1605
01:22:20,604 --> 01:22:22,564
- [screams]
- [splashes]
1606
01:22:24,316 --> 01:22:26,485
[Joker] You two
look so cute together.
1607
01:22:26,485 --> 01:22:28,904
I almost hate
having to blow you apart.
1608
01:22:28,904 --> 01:22:29,822
[launcher cocks]
1609
01:22:29,822 --> 01:22:33,367
Yeah, crush their stupid faces.
1610
01:22:33,367 --> 01:22:34,618
[Batarang whizzing]
1611
01:22:34,618 --> 01:22:37,538
[Mr. Freeze screams, thuds]
1612
01:22:37,538 --> 01:22:40,791
[screaming and thudding
continues]
1613
01:22:43,460 --> 01:22:44,420
[splashing]
1614
01:22:45,754 --> 01:22:47,464
Uh-oh. Hit me, Damian!
1615
01:22:48,549 --> 01:22:50,592
Careful. Don't poke
your eye out.
1616
01:22:50,592 --> 01:22:51,802
[laughs]
1617
01:22:51,802 --> 01:22:54,638
A Merry Christmas
to me and to you,
1618
01:22:54,638 --> 01:22:56,390
a dark night.
1619
01:22:58,600 --> 01:22:59,935
[laughs] You missed!
1620
01:23:00,811 --> 01:23:02,730
That's kind of the point.
1621
01:23:02,730 --> 01:23:04,815
Oh. Oh, right,
they're Batarangs.
1622
01:23:07,067 --> 01:23:09,486
[groaning]
1623
01:23:11,488 --> 01:23:13,449
["Silent Night" playing]
1624
01:23:16,660 --> 01:23:17,911
[sirens wailing]
1625
01:23:21,915 --> 01:23:23,876
[distorted groaning]
1626
01:23:32,593 --> 01:23:35,012
[distorted laughing]
1627
01:23:40,267 --> 01:23:43,604
[distorted] Merry Christmas.
1628
01:23:49,943 --> 01:23:51,195
- [grunts]
- [villains] Ooh.
1629
01:23:51,195 --> 01:23:52,488
[both] Oh.
1630
01:23:54,031 --> 01:23:55,282
[both]
♪ Da-na-na-na-na-na ♪
1631
01:23:55,282 --> 01:23:57,242
[groaning]
1632
01:23:58,577 --> 01:24:00,746
How many times
is he gonna fall in that junk?
1633
01:24:00,746 --> 01:24:03,749
Seriously, he should keep
a snorkel in his suit pocket.
1634
01:24:03,749 --> 01:24:04,792
[Damian laughs]
1635
01:24:04,792 --> 01:24:07,169
[Batman] Ready to go home
for Christmas?
1636
01:24:07,169 --> 01:24:10,255
[Damian] Actually, Dad,
we have one last mission.
1637
01:24:12,549 --> 01:24:14,551
[sirens wailing faintly]
1638
01:24:22,309 --> 01:24:23,560
[clangs]
1639
01:24:29,775 --> 01:24:31,568
[Damian] Merry Christmas!
1640
01:24:31,568 --> 01:24:33,153
- [man] Look, it's Batman!
- [woman] Batman!
1641
01:24:33,153 --> 01:24:35,739
- All right.
- Hey, it's our stuff.
1642
01:24:35,739 --> 01:24:37,658
My drum set!
1643
01:24:37,658 --> 01:24:40,035
A one, and a two,
and a joy to you.
1644
01:24:40,035 --> 01:24:43,580
All right, everyone.
Christmas is back on.
1645
01:24:44,414 --> 01:24:45,499
[all grunt]
1646
01:24:45,499 --> 01:24:47,417
[marching band playing
"Deck The Halls
With Boughs Of Holly"]
1647
01:24:50,671 --> 01:24:52,673
[Damian laughing]
1648
01:24:54,299 --> 01:24:55,717
[man] Look, it's our presents.
1649
01:24:55,717 --> 01:24:57,427
- Christmas is saved.
- [woman] Oh, wonderful.
1650
01:24:57,427 --> 01:24:58,720
[Alfred laughing]
1651
01:25:01,223 --> 01:25:03,016
[laughs] Go long.
1652
01:25:04,476 --> 01:25:05,686
[children laughing]
1653
01:25:07,771 --> 01:25:09,523
[all cheering]
1654
01:25:10,232 --> 01:25:12,776
Merry Christmas, Gotham City.
1655
01:25:16,572 --> 01:25:17,489
[yelps]
1656
01:25:20,367 --> 01:25:21,201
[slurps]
1657
01:25:21,952 --> 01:25:24,037
That would seem to be
all the presents, young sir.
1658
01:25:24,037 --> 01:25:26,248
Nope. Still one left.
1659
01:25:26,248 --> 01:25:27,374
What's that?
1660
01:25:27,374 --> 01:25:29,835
{\an8}- Merry Christmas, Dad.
- [laughs]
1661
01:25:29,835 --> 01:25:31,128
I owed you a hug.
1662
01:25:31,128 --> 01:25:33,422
Best Christmas gift ever.
1663
01:25:33,422 --> 01:25:35,007
Hm, the price was right.
1664
01:25:35,007 --> 01:25:36,842
- [cat meows]
- I beg your pardon, sirs,
1665
01:25:36,842 --> 01:25:38,218
but by any chance,
1666
01:25:38,218 --> 01:25:42,347
is there room for
an old Englishman and a tabby
in that embrace?
1667
01:25:42,347 --> 01:25:44,099
There always is.
1668
01:25:44,099 --> 01:25:45,767
Merry Christmas, guys.
1669
01:25:46,602 --> 01:25:47,644
[Damian sighs]
1670
01:25:47,644 --> 01:25:48,729
Damian, what's wrong?
1671
01:25:49,229 --> 01:25:53,317
{\an8}I know it sounds silly,
but I kind of
feel bad for Joker.
1672
01:25:53,317 --> 01:25:55,736
Feel bad for Joker?
1673
01:25:55,736 --> 01:25:57,321
[laughs] That sounds insane.
1674
01:25:57,321 --> 01:25:59,197
I mean, he just
hit me in the head
with a mallet,
1675
01:25:59,197 --> 01:26:00,657
like an hour ago.
1676
01:26:00,657 --> 01:26:01,700
{\an8}I know.
1677
01:26:01,700 --> 01:26:05,495
{\an8}But all he wanted
for Christmas
was to not be alone.
1678
01:26:07,789 --> 01:26:09,499
My head still hurts, Damian.
1679
01:26:09,499 --> 01:26:11,752
- I mean, that mallet
was like this big.
- [Selina meows]
1680
01:26:11,752 --> 01:26:14,504
{\an8}You know, Dad,
you both say
that you're sworn enemies.
1681
01:26:14,504 --> 01:26:15,505
{\an8}- [Selina purring]
- But deep down,
1682
01:26:15,505 --> 01:26:17,758
{\an8}I think you and Joker
really like each other.
1683
01:26:17,758 --> 01:26:19,676
Damian, he's a supervillain.
1684
01:26:19,676 --> 01:26:21,094
Mom's a supervillain.
1685
01:26:21,094 --> 01:26:24,181
Mom's... complicated.
1686
01:26:24,181 --> 01:26:26,058
A complicated supervillain.
1687
01:26:26,058 --> 01:26:27,100
[Alfred and Damian laugh]
1688
01:26:27,100 --> 01:26:28,852
Hey, don't you start.
1689
01:26:28,852 --> 01:26:31,688
Also, I hate the Joker.
1690
01:26:35,943 --> 01:26:39,655
♪ Jingle Bells, Batman smells
Robin laid an egg ♪
1691
01:26:39,655 --> 01:26:40,572
[chuckles]
1692
01:26:40,572 --> 01:26:43,408
Sorry, it's the only
Christmas song
I know the words to.
1693
01:26:43,408 --> 01:26:45,535
Well, "smells" does
rhyme with "bells."
1694
01:26:45,535 --> 01:26:47,371
I quite like that song.
1695
01:26:47,371 --> 01:26:49,539
♪ Jingle Bells, Batman smells ♪
1696
01:26:49,539 --> 01:26:51,875
[together]
♪ Robin laid an egg ♪
1697
01:26:51,875 --> 01:26:53,919
♪ The Batmobile
Lost its wheel ♪
1698
01:26:53,919 --> 01:26:59,716
♪ And the Joker
Had a nice dinner
With all of his friends ♪
1699
01:27:02,469 --> 01:27:03,512
I'm not your friend.
1700
01:27:03,512 --> 01:27:05,389
["Just Another Christmas Song"
playing]
1701
01:27:19,528 --> 01:27:21,571
♪ Uh... just another
Christmas song ♪
1702
01:27:21,571 --> 01:27:23,740
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1703
01:27:25,158 --> 01:27:27,160
♪ Uh... Just another
Christmas song ♪
1704
01:27:27,160 --> 01:27:29,538
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1705
01:27:31,873 --> 01:27:36,795
♪ I'm dreaming of
A white Christmas ♪
1706
01:27:36,795 --> 01:27:40,674
♪ With jingle bells
In the sky ♪
1707
01:27:43,093 --> 01:27:47,180
♪ Do you see what I see? ♪
1708
01:27:47,180 --> 01:27:49,558
[vocalizing]
1709
01:27:49,558 --> 01:27:53,020
♪ Christmas tree ♪
1710
01:27:53,020 --> 01:27:57,858
♪ It's the same old song ♪
1711
01:27:57,858 --> 01:28:01,069
- ♪ But I'll sing along ♪
- ♪ Just another
Christmas song ♪
1712
01:28:01,069 --> 01:28:03,155
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1713
01:28:03,155 --> 01:28:06,283
- ♪ I'm gonna sing along ♪
- ♪ Just another
Christmas song ♪
1714
01:28:06,283 --> 01:28:08,744
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1715
01:28:08,744 --> 01:28:11,955
- ♪ Just another little song ♪
- ♪ Just another
Christmas song ♪
1716
01:28:11,955 --> 01:28:14,082
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1717
01:28:14,082 --> 01:28:15,917
♪ I said
I think I'll sing along ♪
1718
01:28:15,917 --> 01:28:17,544
♪ Just another
Christmas song ♪
1719
01:28:17,544 --> 01:28:19,796
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1720
01:28:19,796 --> 01:28:20,839
[vocalizing]
1721
01:28:23,425 --> 01:28:25,260
♪ This time I'll sing along ♪
1722
01:28:28,805 --> 01:28:30,766
♪ But this time
I'll sing along ♪
1723
01:28:30,766 --> 01:28:34,978
[children]
Merry Christmas, everybody!
1724
01:31:40,997 --> 01:31:42,499
[Bat-Dad]
Merry Christmas, guys.