1 00:00:12,930 --> 00:00:14,891 [espresso machine spitting] 2 00:00:14,932 --> 00:00:17,810 [liquid pouring] 3 00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:21,481 - * Well, sometimes I go out by myself * 4 00:00:21,522 --> 00:00:25,526 * And I look across the water * 5 00:00:25,568 --> 00:00:27,111 Whoo-hoo! - Scheisse! 6 00:00:27,153 --> 00:00:30,239 - * And I think of all the things, what you're doing * 7 00:00:30,281 --> 00:00:34,202 * And in my head, I'll paint a picture * 8 00:00:34,243 --> 00:00:35,578 - Hey--ugh. 9 00:00:35,620 --> 00:00:38,247 - * Oh, since I've come on home * 10 00:00:38,289 --> 00:00:40,625 * Well, my body's been a mess * 11 00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:45,922 * And I miss your ginger hair and the way you like to dress * 12 00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:47,715 * Won't you come on over? * 13 00:00:47,757 --> 00:00:52,345 * Stop making a fool out of me * 14 00:00:52,387 --> 00:00:56,099 * Why don't you come on over, Heidi? * 15 00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:58,309 [Amy Winehouse's "Valerie"] 16 00:00:58,351 --> 00:01:01,396 * Heidi * 17 00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:02,897 [upbeat music] 18 00:01:02,939 --> 00:01:05,942 * Heidi * 19 00:01:05,983 --> 00:01:07,610 * * 20 00:01:07,652 --> 00:01:11,072 * Heidi * 21 00:01:11,114 --> 00:01:12,490 * Hei-- * 22 00:01:12,532 --> 00:01:14,867 [notification chimes] 23 00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:18,121 [notification chimes] 24 00:01:18,162 --> 00:01:20,039 - * Ba ba ba ba ba * 25 00:01:20,081 --> 00:01:22,125 - Snap out of it, Bumper! 26 00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:25,712 - I shower before bed so I'm always clean when I get in it. 27 00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:27,547 Therefore, my sheets are always clean 28 00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:29,632 because the body in them is clean. 29 00:01:29,674 --> 00:01:33,094 So by transitive property, I never have to wash my sheets. 30 00:01:33,136 --> 00:01:34,721 - Ah. - I do not shower. 31 00:01:34,762 --> 00:01:37,181 I trust my sexual partners to lick me clean. 32 00:01:37,223 --> 00:01:40,184 - Gross. - That's a lot of trust. 33 00:01:40,226 --> 00:01:41,394 - Hello! 34 00:01:41,436 --> 00:01:44,439 A very equal hello to all of you. 35 00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:47,650 Individually, I am greeting you all individually, 36 00:01:47,692 --> 00:01:49,193 and no one more than the other. 37 00:01:52,196 --> 00:01:53,531 Hello, Hodie. 38 00:01:53,573 --> 00:01:55,408 I didn't realize you were going to be here today. 39 00:01:55,450 --> 00:01:56,659 - Uh, you didn't-- 40 00:01:56,701 --> 00:01:59,245 did you just call me Hodie? - Did I? 41 00:01:59,287 --> 00:02:01,372 - Yeah. - You know what I think it is? 42 00:02:01,414 --> 00:02:03,291 It's 'cause I think about you so infrequently, 43 00:02:03,332 --> 00:02:05,376 it wasn't, like, on the tip of my tongue. 44 00:02:05,418 --> 00:02:06,836 I sometimes forget it. It's not Hodie? 45 00:02:06,878 --> 00:02:09,172 - It's Heidi. - OK, now it's back. 46 00:02:09,213 --> 00:02:10,590 - Why wouldn't Heidi be here? 47 00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:12,508 - Yeah, they were all on the text thread. 48 00:02:12,550 --> 00:02:13,885 - OK, why are we hashing this out right now? 49 00:02:13,926 --> 00:02:16,345 Let's just get down to business 'cause I, for one, 50 00:02:16,387 --> 00:02:18,973 am here for a business meeting, so... 51 00:02:19,015 --> 00:02:21,350 - Well. [clears throat] I called you here 52 00:02:21,392 --> 00:02:22,769 to discuss our strategy 53 00:02:22,810 --> 00:02:25,146 for the Unity Day auditions tomorrow. 54 00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:27,648 [echoing] First things first... 55 00:02:27,690 --> 00:02:30,777 - Heidi, you have a little eyelash. 56 00:02:30,818 --> 00:02:31,611 - Oh, I do? 57 00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,196 - Do you mind if I get it? 58 00:02:33,237 --> 00:02:36,574 - Yeah, sure, OK. 59 00:02:36,616 --> 00:02:39,077 - Actually, no, it's just a shadow cast 60 00:02:39,118 --> 00:02:40,161 on your perfectly symmetrical-- 61 00:02:40,203 --> 00:02:41,204 - Bumper! - Hmm? 62 00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:42,705 - Focus up! - Yep. 63 00:02:42,747 --> 00:02:43,831 - We've been preparing for this day for months now. 64 00:02:43,873 --> 00:02:45,875 - Work mode. Focus up! 65 00:02:45,917 --> 00:02:47,460 Getting focused. 66 00:02:47,502 --> 00:02:50,254 You know what, I need to feng shui this place 67 00:02:50,296 --> 00:02:51,381 real quick. - What? 68 00:02:51,422 --> 00:02:52,840 - For me it's like an energy thing 69 00:02:52,882 --> 00:02:54,008 in here right now, if you guys could just switch places? 70 00:02:54,050 --> 00:02:55,301 - OK. - Yeah. 71 00:02:55,343 --> 00:02:56,719 You go over there. Thank you. - Sit here? 72 00:02:56,761 --> 00:02:58,221 - Sit right where you're at. - Don't move Sebastian. 73 00:02:58,262 --> 00:02:59,806 - To me, this works better. 74 00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:01,307 That's a really good spot, right there. 75 00:03:01,349 --> 00:03:02,308 Carry on. 76 00:03:02,350 --> 00:03:04,268 - OK. 77 00:03:04,310 --> 00:03:05,603 Yeah? - Yep. 78 00:03:07,021 --> 00:03:12,610 - Let's go over our likely panel of judges one more time. 79 00:03:12,652 --> 00:03:14,237 Our toughest judge will be-- 80 00:03:14,278 --> 00:03:15,405 - OK, I know this one. 81 00:03:15,446 --> 00:03:19,033 Um, uh, not my feet, but my Hans. 82 00:03:19,075 --> 00:03:20,952 - Yes, Hans Schroeder. 83 00:03:20,993 --> 00:03:22,662 His incisive critique is so sharp, 84 00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:25,081 they call him Edward Scissor-Hans. 85 00:03:25,123 --> 00:03:26,374 - Scissor-Hans, that's funny. 86 00:03:26,416 --> 00:03:29,460 - [gasps] Bumper! 87 00:03:29,502 --> 00:03:31,170 Yogurt? - That's not mine. 88 00:03:31,212 --> 00:03:32,714 - Nein! 89 00:03:32,755 --> 00:03:34,006 - Ow! - It wasn't mine. 90 00:03:34,048 --> 00:03:35,800 - For the next 24 hours, I don't want your throat 91 00:03:35,842 --> 00:03:38,219 anywhere near dairy. Understood? 92 00:03:38,261 --> 00:03:39,637 - I have to be totally honest. 93 00:03:39,679 --> 00:03:42,140 I eat an ice cream sundae every morning for breakfast. 94 00:03:42,181 --> 00:03:43,307 - What? - You know what? 95 00:03:43,349 --> 00:03:44,726 I'll downgrade to a bowl of sprinkles 96 00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,144 if it'll help me perform better. 97 00:03:46,185 --> 00:03:48,688 - It will, and thank you. - You have got this, Bumper. 98 00:03:48,730 --> 00:03:50,398 We've been doing everything right. 99 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:51,858 Your songs are popular. 100 00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:53,693 That scrappy little video that we made-- 101 00:03:53,735 --> 00:03:55,945 without Klaus's help, thank you very much-- 102 00:03:55,987 --> 00:03:57,029 it's a hit, booboo. 103 00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:58,448 You've got this. You've got real fans. 104 00:03:58,489 --> 00:04:00,032 - [giggles] - And besides... 105 00:04:00,074 --> 00:04:01,033 - She called me booboo. 106 00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:02,452 - Other than Gisela, 107 00:04:02,493 --> 00:04:05,621 this is basically your newcomer competition-- 108 00:04:05,663 --> 00:04:07,749 the Oppenheimer Family Band. 109 00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:10,126 - Ugh, I hate family bands. 110 00:04:10,168 --> 00:04:13,379 It's cheating to start a band with the people you invented. 111 00:04:13,421 --> 00:04:14,964 - Also, they're stupid. - Ugh. 112 00:04:15,006 --> 00:04:16,382 - You've got a great shot tomorrow, Bumper. 113 00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:18,634 All you need to do is focus up. 114 00:04:18,676 --> 00:04:21,137 - Yeah, no, totally ficus up. 115 00:04:21,179 --> 00:04:23,389 [dreamy music] 116 00:04:23,431 --> 00:04:26,559 * * 117 00:04:26,601 --> 00:04:27,977 - What the [bleep] are you doing? 118 00:04:28,019 --> 00:04:28,895 - Hmm? 119 00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:33,691 - * Bow bow bow bow bow * 120 00:04:33,733 --> 00:04:36,235 * Bum bum bum * 121 00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:38,780 * Bum bum bum * 122 00:04:41,657 --> 00:04:43,493 - I cannot believe you brought us here, Pieter. 123 00:04:43,534 --> 00:04:45,703 This is the best restaurant in Berlin. 124 00:04:45,745 --> 00:04:48,748 - This is Bumper's last meal before he's a superstar. 125 00:04:48,790 --> 00:04:50,792 Food will taste different to him after tomorrow. 126 00:04:50,833 --> 00:04:53,878 - Ooh, isn't that not my feet, but my Hans? 127 00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:54,962 - Yep. 128 00:04:55,004 --> 00:04:58,299 - Oh, yeah, that is Hans Schroeder, 129 00:04:58,341 --> 00:05:00,593 the Unity Day judge. Wow. 130 00:05:00,635 --> 00:05:03,054 How strange that he is at his favorite restaurant 131 00:05:03,096 --> 00:05:05,014 on his anniversary, which I discovered 132 00:05:05,056 --> 00:05:07,266 by poring over marriage announcements 133 00:05:07,308 --> 00:05:09,811 on newspaper microfiche. What? 134 00:05:09,852 --> 00:05:12,897 - You devious little minx of a manager. 135 00:05:12,939 --> 00:05:15,817 This was your plan all along, wasn't it? 136 00:05:15,858 --> 00:05:17,151 Sorry, I'm not good at winking. 137 00:05:17,193 --> 00:05:19,570 - OK, I'm going to go put in a good word for you. 138 00:05:19,612 --> 00:05:20,988 You sit tight. 139 00:05:21,030 --> 00:05:22,949 I'll hit you with a signal if he wants to meet. 140 00:05:25,159 --> 00:05:26,411 [clears throat] 141 00:05:27,870 --> 00:05:29,705 - What--what's the signal? 142 00:05:29,747 --> 00:05:31,374 We'll figure it out. 143 00:05:31,416 --> 00:05:32,834 - Hans, hello. 144 00:05:32,875 --> 00:05:34,919 Welcome to me, Pieter Kramer. 145 00:05:34,961 --> 00:05:36,546 And please say hello and welcome 146 00:05:36,587 --> 00:05:38,297 to Bumper Allen over there. 147 00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:39,799 - Hi, Hans! 148 00:05:39,841 --> 00:05:43,052 - Yes, you will be hearing him with your ears tomorrow. 149 00:05:43,094 --> 00:05:45,304 - Ah, yes. 150 00:05:45,346 --> 00:05:47,515 I'm seeing Bumper Allen at last. 151 00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:50,059 - What do you think? 152 00:05:50,101 --> 00:05:51,436 Why don't we just skip those auditions 153 00:05:51,477 --> 00:05:53,396 and just get this guy booked, right? 154 00:05:53,438 --> 00:05:54,522 I'm kidding, of course. 155 00:05:54,564 --> 00:05:55,815 Unless that is possible? 156 00:05:55,857 --> 00:05:58,359 - This is the artist formally known as Prawns. 157 00:05:58,401 --> 00:06:00,361 [all laughing] Like Prince. 158 00:06:00,403 --> 00:06:01,779 - The judging committee feels-- 159 00:06:01,821 --> 00:06:03,740 [glass shatters] - Oh, son of a--God dang it! 160 00:06:03,781 --> 00:06:05,783 All right, we'll just-- will these sop it up? 161 00:06:05,825 --> 00:06:07,201 It's not sopping it. - I don't know. 162 00:06:07,243 --> 00:06:08,494 - Miss, hi. 163 00:06:08,536 --> 00:06:10,329 Can I get a T-shirt from the gift shop? 164 00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:12,248 - No. - Interesting. 165 00:06:12,290 --> 00:06:13,750 Cracker Barrel has a gift shop. 166 00:06:13,791 --> 00:06:16,127 - The judging committee feels Bumper 167 00:06:16,169 --> 00:06:19,213 is not the best representative of what Germany has to offer. 168 00:06:19,255 --> 00:06:21,340 Then there's you, Pieter. 169 00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:23,342 Your name is still too toxic. 170 00:06:23,384 --> 00:06:25,386 Your personal failings-- 171 00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:29,015 how do I say this in a kind way? 172 00:06:29,057 --> 00:06:31,100 You make our genitals shrivel up with rage 173 00:06:31,142 --> 00:06:32,185 at your music crimes. 174 00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:33,770 - But I'll just be behind the scenes. 175 00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:35,396 You won't even know I'm there. 176 00:06:35,438 --> 00:06:37,065 I can duck in the crowd if that helps? 177 00:06:37,106 --> 00:06:39,817 - I'm sorry, but we just can't be involved in all that. 178 00:06:39,859 --> 00:06:41,986 Bumper is not going to get an audition. 179 00:06:46,449 --> 00:06:48,951 - It's all over. This was my last chance. 180 00:06:48,993 --> 00:06:51,621 - I'm sure there's something else, some other concert. 181 00:06:51,662 --> 00:06:53,039 - That makes no difference. 182 00:06:53,081 --> 00:06:55,625 Try as I might, I clearly will never outrun my shame. 183 00:06:55,666 --> 00:06:57,460 - OK, guys, I think we need 184 00:06:57,502 --> 00:06:59,128 to take a chillaxative, all right? 185 00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:01,631 I will catch up to Hans and smooth this whole thing out. 186 00:07:01,672 --> 00:07:04,300 - You just don't know when to stop, do you? 187 00:07:04,342 --> 00:07:07,345 I was trying to help you make a good impression with Hans, 188 00:07:07,387 --> 00:07:08,971 but you just made us all look bad. 189 00:07:11,557 --> 00:07:13,476 - You're blaming me? - Yeah. 190 00:07:13,518 --> 00:07:16,687 You're like a bumper car, just bouncing and crashing 191 00:07:16,729 --> 00:07:18,815 into everyone without a care in the world, 192 00:07:18,856 --> 00:07:20,733 treating Germany like your private playground, 193 00:07:20,775 --> 00:07:22,402 which, by the way, is a public playground 194 00:07:22,443 --> 00:07:24,695 because Germany is a wonderful place to raise a family. 195 00:07:24,737 --> 00:07:26,197 - Oh, yeah? Well, we would have still been in there 196 00:07:26,239 --> 00:07:28,783 eating fancy seafoam if you hadn't turned 197 00:07:28,825 --> 00:07:30,910 the whole industry against us with your cheating! 198 00:07:30,952 --> 00:07:33,162 - Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, come on now, OK? 199 00:07:33,204 --> 00:07:35,790 So no Unity Day. So what? 200 00:07:35,832 --> 00:07:37,333 We'll just keep working on Bumper's career 201 00:07:37,375 --> 00:07:38,668 like we have been. 202 00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:40,586 Easy-peasy. We can figure this out. 203 00:07:40,628 --> 00:07:42,672 - No, we won't, Heidi. 204 00:07:42,714 --> 00:07:46,008 Not every problem can be solved by being perky and optimistic. 205 00:07:46,050 --> 00:07:47,468 - Yes, they can. 206 00:07:47,510 --> 00:07:50,596 - Oh, I am so tired of humoring you two all the time! 207 00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:51,681 - Pieter, hold on. 208 00:07:51,723 --> 00:07:52,765 - Is that what you have been doing 209 00:07:52,807 --> 00:07:54,892 all of these years, humoring me? 210 00:07:54,934 --> 00:07:57,603 Is managing me some sort of pity thing for you? 211 00:07:57,645 --> 00:07:58,688 - Well, it definitely wasn't because 212 00:07:58,730 --> 00:08:00,189 of the money I was making. 213 00:08:00,231 --> 00:08:02,775 Oh, God, I'm better off moving to the country 214 00:08:02,817 --> 00:08:05,862 and cutting off sheep testicles like my ancestors. 215 00:08:05,903 --> 00:08:07,238 I resign as a manager. 216 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:08,823 - What? - Fine! 217 00:08:08,865 --> 00:08:11,117 Then I pre-emptively fire you as my manager. 218 00:08:11,159 --> 00:08:12,785 - Thea, are you going to say anything? 219 00:08:12,827 --> 00:08:13,995 - I'm staying out of this. 220 00:08:14,036 --> 00:08:15,872 I don't care. - Oh, of course you don't. 221 00:08:15,913 --> 00:08:16,956 - You never care about anything. 222 00:08:16,998 --> 00:08:19,292 - Let's just hash this out real quick. 223 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:21,669 - I'm sorry, Bumper. 224 00:08:21,711 --> 00:08:23,713 But everyone's just out for themselves. 225 00:08:23,755 --> 00:08:25,882 You could've stayed in America for that. 226 00:08:25,923 --> 00:08:27,300 You never should have come here. 227 00:08:27,341 --> 00:08:30,094 [somber music] 228 00:08:30,136 --> 00:08:36,601 * * 229 00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:44,609 - [singing in German] 230 00:08:44,650 --> 00:08:46,486 [soft upbeat music] 231 00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,279 - What shall we toast to? 232 00:08:48,321 --> 00:08:50,990 The German law that states freedom 233 00:08:51,032 --> 00:08:52,617 is a basic human dignity? 234 00:08:52,658 --> 00:08:55,286 - Whatever. Does it matter? 235 00:08:55,328 --> 00:08:57,163 My friends hate me and each other, 236 00:08:57,205 --> 00:08:58,372 and all my dreams are dead. 237 00:08:58,414 --> 00:08:59,999 - Oh, dreams are what your brain does 238 00:09:00,041 --> 00:09:01,375 when it's being lazy. 239 00:09:01,417 --> 00:09:03,920 - [laughs] Yeah, that's true. 240 00:09:06,214 --> 00:09:07,423 - Ah. 241 00:09:07,465 --> 00:09:10,176 - [gulps] Ooh, I didn't like that. 242 00:09:10,218 --> 00:09:12,095 I didn't like that. 243 00:09:12,136 --> 00:09:14,222 I'll take a lemon drop. 244 00:09:14,263 --> 00:09:16,099 But hold the sugared rim. 245 00:09:16,140 --> 00:09:18,684 Since I no longer have to worry about working hard 246 00:09:18,726 --> 00:09:21,270 or pursuing my dreams, I can dedicate my life 247 00:09:21,312 --> 00:09:22,939 to drinking and being sad, 248 00:09:22,980 --> 00:09:26,275 which is very close to my dream of drinking and being happy. 249 00:09:26,317 --> 00:09:27,693 Donk-ee. 250 00:09:27,735 --> 00:09:30,363 - That reminds me of when the wall was constructed 251 00:09:30,405 --> 00:09:31,864 through the middle of my schoolyard. 252 00:09:31,906 --> 00:09:34,575 It happened so quickly that many of my friends 253 00:09:34,617 --> 00:09:36,702 were suddenly just on the other side. 254 00:09:36,744 --> 00:09:38,329 I never saw them again. 255 00:09:38,371 --> 00:09:40,832 [air rushing] 256 00:09:40,873 --> 00:09:42,041 - What? 257 00:09:42,083 --> 00:09:43,710 I'm sorry, I didn't hear what you just said. 258 00:09:43,751 --> 00:09:47,046 But on top of losing the chance at Unity Day 259 00:09:47,088 --> 00:09:50,049 and everyone turning on each other, 260 00:09:50,091 --> 00:09:51,426 the real kicker, 261 00:09:51,467 --> 00:09:54,178 even Heidi said I shouldn't have come to Germany. 262 00:09:55,763 --> 00:09:57,932 I really care for her. 263 00:09:57,974 --> 00:10:02,103 If that's how she feels, there's nothing I can do. 264 00:10:02,145 --> 00:10:06,232 - Well, Bumper, only dead fish go with the flow. 265 00:10:06,274 --> 00:10:07,567 [toilet flushes] 266 00:10:07,608 --> 00:10:09,610 - [coughs] 267 00:10:09,652 --> 00:10:11,529 You are so wise. 268 00:10:11,571 --> 00:10:14,073 You're right. This can't be it. 269 00:10:14,115 --> 00:10:15,658 There has to be something I could do. 270 00:10:15,700 --> 00:10:17,952 - Oh, I was speaking about a dire problem 271 00:10:17,994 --> 00:10:19,579 regarding the hostel's plumbing, 272 00:10:19,620 --> 00:10:22,790 but I'm glad it also applies here. 273 00:10:26,127 --> 00:10:27,670 - Hans! 274 00:10:29,714 --> 00:10:33,092 German Unity Day Judge Hans Schroeder, 275 00:10:33,134 --> 00:10:36,095 I know you live here, 'cause the internet told me. 276 00:10:36,137 --> 00:10:39,182 I couldn't find a boombox at this time of the night, 277 00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:41,809 but luckily, I got the greatest boombox 278 00:10:41,851 --> 00:10:43,561 of all time right here, 279 00:10:43,603 --> 00:10:45,063 my dang mouth. 280 00:10:46,606 --> 00:10:49,067 * I'll be there for you * 281 00:10:49,108 --> 00:10:53,029 * These five words I swear to you * 282 00:10:53,071 --> 00:10:56,866 [mumbling] * I'll be here for you * 283 00:10:56,908 --> 00:11:01,120 * I'll be there for you * 284 00:11:01,162 --> 00:11:02,497 [dogs howling] 285 00:11:02,538 --> 00:11:04,707 * Hans! * 286 00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:09,045 Give me a chance, man! 287 00:11:09,087 --> 00:11:13,508 I was put on this Earth to be a song and dance man. 288 00:11:15,218 --> 00:11:18,262 Hans! [scoffs] 289 00:11:18,304 --> 00:11:22,100 Uh, you think I messed everything up? 290 00:11:22,141 --> 00:11:25,561 Well, I'll show you how I can... 291 00:11:25,603 --> 00:11:27,105 [unzipping] Mess things up. 292 00:11:27,146 --> 00:11:28,856 [upbeat music] 293 00:11:28,898 --> 00:11:30,066 Ah. 294 00:11:30,108 --> 00:11:32,360 Draw a little eighth note for you. 295 00:11:32,402 --> 00:11:35,071 Uh-oh, here comes the crescendo. 296 00:11:35,113 --> 00:11:37,490 [siren wailing] 297 00:11:37,532 --> 00:11:39,492 Oh, no. 298 00:11:39,534 --> 00:11:42,120 [zips] 299 00:11:42,161 --> 00:11:43,329 I'm sorry, officers. 300 00:11:43,371 --> 00:11:45,748 There was a miscommunication-- 301 00:11:49,001 --> 00:11:52,296 I can't believe I'm going to the slammer. 302 00:11:52,338 --> 00:11:55,717 Now Martha Stewart and I have two things in common. 303 00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:59,095 I also think the secret is in the marinade. 304 00:11:59,137 --> 00:12:00,555 - The only slammer you will be going to 305 00:12:00,596 --> 00:12:03,099 is the one that slams you with medicine and nice care-- 306 00:12:03,141 --> 00:12:04,225 the hospital. 307 00:12:04,267 --> 00:12:06,185 - In Germany, we take drunk people 308 00:12:06,227 --> 00:12:09,230 to the hospital for a thorough health evaluation. 309 00:12:09,272 --> 00:12:11,357 We rehydrate them, hmm? 310 00:12:11,399 --> 00:12:14,736 So their hangovers are not too severe and send them home. 311 00:12:14,777 --> 00:12:16,237 - Are you crazy? 312 00:12:16,279 --> 00:12:19,073 I can't go to the hospital. I don't have any money. 313 00:12:19,115 --> 00:12:20,867 [both laughing] 314 00:12:20,908 --> 00:12:23,536 - You silly lemon-lipped man! 315 00:12:23,578 --> 00:12:25,371 The hospital is free, of course. 316 00:12:25,413 --> 00:12:28,875 - God damn, that shit's funny. - [chortles] 317 00:12:28,916 --> 00:12:31,419 - What good is amazing free healthcare 318 00:12:31,461 --> 00:12:35,923 and the humane treatment of the drunken and disorderly 319 00:12:35,965 --> 00:12:38,134 if you don't have anyone to share it with? 320 00:12:38,176 --> 00:12:41,095 [somber music] 321 00:12:41,137 --> 00:12:43,890 * * 322 00:12:43,931 --> 00:12:46,851 * Lay a whisper * 323 00:12:46,893 --> 00:12:49,896 * On my pillow * 324 00:12:49,937 --> 00:12:52,899 * Leave the winter * 325 00:12:52,940 --> 00:12:55,860 * On the ground * 326 00:12:55,902 --> 00:12:58,780 both: * I wake up lonely * 327 00:12:58,821 --> 00:13:01,949 * There's air of silence * 328 00:13:01,991 --> 00:13:04,786 * In the bedroom, ooh * 329 00:13:04,827 --> 00:13:06,037 - * And all around * 330 00:13:06,079 --> 00:13:08,081 - * And all around * 331 00:13:08,122 --> 00:13:10,583 - * Touch me now * [Bumper beatboxing] 332 00:13:10,625 --> 00:13:13,503 * I close my eyes * 333 00:13:13,544 --> 00:13:16,089 - * And dream away * - * Dream away * 334 00:13:16,130 --> 00:13:19,050 all: * Dream away * 335 00:13:19,092 --> 00:13:20,802 - * It must have been love * 336 00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:21,886 all: * Must've been love * 337 00:13:21,928 --> 00:13:24,347 - * But it's over now * 338 00:13:24,389 --> 00:13:27,767 all: * But it's over now * - * It must have been good * 339 00:13:27,809 --> 00:13:30,770 * But I lost it somehow * 340 00:13:30,812 --> 00:13:33,773 * It must have been love * all: * Must've been love 341 00:13:33,815 --> 00:13:36,609 - * But it's over now * 342 00:13:36,651 --> 00:13:39,779 * It must have been love * 343 00:13:39,821 --> 00:13:42,615 [Roxette's "It Must Have Been Love"] 344 00:13:42,657 --> 00:13:47,412 * * 345 00:13:47,453 --> 00:13:48,830 - I'm going to need another. 346 00:13:48,871 --> 00:13:51,666 - The doctors told me to cut you off. 347 00:13:51,707 --> 00:13:53,000 - Please? 348 00:13:57,630 --> 00:13:59,340 Thank you. 349 00:13:59,382 --> 00:14:01,342 I know you're probably busy 350 00:14:01,384 --> 00:14:04,011 and don't want to hear about my devastating heartbreak, 351 00:14:04,053 --> 00:14:05,847 both professional and personal. 352 00:14:05,888 --> 00:14:09,183 But I could really use someone to chat with. 353 00:14:09,225 --> 00:14:11,477 - You have complimentary personalized stationery 354 00:14:11,519 --> 00:14:12,895 next to your bed. 355 00:14:12,937 --> 00:14:15,022 Perhaps you can put your feelings there. 356 00:14:17,442 --> 00:14:19,068 - Wait, my Jell-O! 357 00:14:25,450 --> 00:14:28,327 "Dear Hans, 358 00:14:28,369 --> 00:14:31,664 eat my butt." 359 00:14:31,706 --> 00:14:34,208 OK, and that one's done. 360 00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:37,045 [crumpling paper] 361 00:14:42,675 --> 00:14:45,803 "Dear Heidi. 362 00:14:49,891 --> 00:14:52,894 Hey, you." 363 00:15:00,443 --> 00:15:03,362 [sentimental music] 364 00:15:03,404 --> 00:15:08,659 * * 365 00:15:08,701 --> 00:15:12,455 You have been so supportive of me. 366 00:15:12,497 --> 00:15:14,916 And honestly, I don't know if I deserve it. 367 00:15:14,957 --> 00:15:19,545 I don't know if I deserve any of you. 368 00:15:19,587 --> 00:15:23,925 I know you said I shouldn't have come here, but... 369 00:15:23,966 --> 00:15:26,344 it is one of the best decisions I've ever made. 370 00:15:29,138 --> 00:15:30,807 I came to this strange place. 371 00:15:33,142 --> 00:15:36,437 But little did I know, I was coming home to you. 372 00:15:42,443 --> 00:15:44,278 That was good. 373 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,240 [machine beeping] 374 00:15:48,699 --> 00:15:52,120 [tapping] 375 00:15:52,161 --> 00:15:55,289 [percussive rhythm] 376 00:15:55,331 --> 00:16:01,963 * * 377 00:16:32,452 --> 00:16:33,828 - * My way home * 378 00:16:35,288 --> 00:16:38,583 * I'm on my way home * 379 00:16:43,838 --> 00:16:45,048 How long have you been here? 380 00:16:45,089 --> 00:16:47,550 - Your emergency contact was a Jersey Mike's 381 00:16:47,592 --> 00:16:49,135 in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. 382 00:16:49,177 --> 00:16:51,637 - No, that's my friend, Jersey Mike. 383 00:16:51,679 --> 00:16:53,514 - His first name is Jersey? 384 00:16:53,556 --> 00:16:55,433 - Yeah. - OK. 385 00:16:55,475 --> 00:16:57,685 Well, anyway, they found me under recent calls, 386 00:16:57,727 --> 00:16:59,979 so here I am. 387 00:17:00,021 --> 00:17:03,816 Um, Bumper, I'm so sorry. 388 00:17:03,858 --> 00:17:06,569 I was just frustrated and embarrassed. 389 00:17:06,611 --> 00:17:07,612 You didn't deserve it. 390 00:17:09,489 --> 00:17:11,657 - I'm so sorry too. 391 00:17:11,699 --> 00:17:13,910 I forgot how much you do for me 392 00:17:13,951 --> 00:17:17,038 and how much you've been through. 393 00:17:18,247 --> 00:17:21,084 So don't ever feel like you let me down 394 00:17:21,125 --> 00:17:24,253 because I'm the one who let us all down. 395 00:17:26,464 --> 00:17:30,676 Can you just tell Thea and Heidi that I'm sorry? 396 00:17:30,718 --> 00:17:32,053 - Tell them yourself. 397 00:17:33,763 --> 00:17:35,139 - Thea and Heidi? 398 00:17:35,181 --> 00:17:37,058 Oh, my God--how long have I been here? 399 00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:38,351 - [clears throat] 400 00:17:40,269 --> 00:17:42,605 - Pieter texted you were having a rough time. 401 00:17:42,647 --> 00:17:43,940 - Oh, thank God. 402 00:17:43,981 --> 00:17:45,733 - So here we are. 403 00:17:45,775 --> 00:17:47,402 We all made up on the way. 404 00:17:47,443 --> 00:17:50,696 - I promised Heidi I would care about three things a week. 405 00:17:50,738 --> 00:17:53,741 And so far, it's you and a cool bat I saw. 406 00:17:53,783 --> 00:17:55,034 - I feel honored. 407 00:17:55,076 --> 00:17:56,536 - And I apologized to Heidi 408 00:17:56,577 --> 00:17:58,704 for projecting my insecurities on her. 409 00:17:58,746 --> 00:18:01,791 She's been nothing but loyal, and I blew it. 410 00:18:01,833 --> 00:18:03,376 - And I apologize for nothing 411 00:18:03,418 --> 00:18:06,003 because I didn't do anything wrong. 412 00:18:06,045 --> 00:18:06,963 How's that for being less perky? 413 00:18:07,004 --> 00:18:08,047 - Ah. 414 00:18:08,089 --> 00:18:09,424 - That's really good. 415 00:18:11,634 --> 00:18:13,428 - Bumper, um... 416 00:18:14,929 --> 00:18:16,514 I didn't mean what I said. 417 00:18:16,556 --> 00:18:18,599 I was just upset. 418 00:18:18,641 --> 00:18:20,893 I'm so glad you came here. 419 00:18:20,935 --> 00:18:23,396 [soft sentimental music] 420 00:18:23,438 --> 00:18:25,940 - I have never had friends like you guys before. 421 00:18:25,982 --> 00:18:28,526 In college, I got my appendix taken out. 422 00:18:28,568 --> 00:18:31,612 Treblemakers didn't even send me flowers. 423 00:18:31,654 --> 00:18:33,948 To be fair, I did just dox all of them 424 00:18:33,990 --> 00:18:36,409 for singing out of tune. 425 00:18:36,451 --> 00:18:37,910 No future senators in that crew. 426 00:18:37,952 --> 00:18:39,245 [chuckles] 427 00:18:39,287 --> 00:18:41,289 A lot of dudes, a lot of buttholes. 428 00:18:41,330 --> 00:18:42,915 A lot of butthole photos. 429 00:18:42,957 --> 00:18:45,460 That wasn't my best or my worst. 430 00:18:45,501 --> 00:18:48,296 I've done some horrible things. 431 00:18:48,337 --> 00:18:53,551 I'm also sorry about what I said and did and peed. 432 00:18:53,593 --> 00:18:56,929 - Well, no matter what, we all have each other. 433 00:18:56,971 --> 00:18:58,973 [machine beeping increases] 434 00:18:59,015 --> 00:19:00,183 - Shall we spring you? 435 00:19:00,224 --> 00:19:02,643 - Yep, grab all the free shit you can. 436 00:19:02,685 --> 00:19:05,313 [soft upbeat music] 437 00:19:05,354 --> 00:19:07,356 - Hey, free coat rack. 438 00:19:07,398 --> 00:19:09,734 Oh, shit! We got a leaker! 439 00:19:09,776 --> 00:19:11,819 Hey, I know Unity Day's already ruined, 440 00:19:11,861 --> 00:19:13,321 but there is a silver lining. 441 00:19:13,362 --> 00:19:15,156 I wrote a pretty good song. 442 00:19:15,198 --> 00:19:16,532 all: You wrote a song? 443 00:19:16,574 --> 00:19:18,993 - Yeah, why are we so surprised? 444 00:19:25,124 --> 00:19:27,585 [sentimental music] 445 00:19:27,627 --> 00:19:29,504 - * I am turn, turning * 446 00:19:29,545 --> 00:19:32,507 * Into something different than before * 447 00:19:32,548 --> 00:19:34,342 * 'Cause every turn I'm turning * 448 00:19:34,384 --> 00:19:36,844 * Takes me to your door * 449 00:19:36,886 --> 00:19:43,768 * What if far and away doesn't feel so far? * 450 00:19:47,021 --> 00:19:48,606 [all applauding] 451 00:19:48,648 --> 00:19:51,109 - Wow. That was incredible, Bumper. 452 00:19:51,150 --> 00:19:53,152 I mean it. None of us thought you could do that, 453 00:19:53,194 --> 00:19:54,779 never in a million years. 454 00:19:54,821 --> 00:19:56,739 - Making art from your pain, huh? 455 00:19:56,781 --> 00:19:58,491 You really are a Berliner. 456 00:19:58,533 --> 00:19:59,784 - It seems like you were listening 457 00:19:59,826 --> 00:20:01,828 when I taught you how to write a song. 458 00:20:01,869 --> 00:20:05,456 - Well, I had a pretty great teacher. 459 00:20:05,498 --> 00:20:07,500 - More bitter rhubarb wine, anyone? 460 00:20:07,542 --> 00:20:08,584 - Sure. - Yes. 461 00:20:08,626 --> 00:20:09,794 - Let's get drunk again. 462 00:20:09,836 --> 00:20:11,129 What's the worst that could happen? 463 00:20:11,170 --> 00:20:12,922 They throw me back in the most glamorous hospital 464 00:20:12,964 --> 00:20:13,965 I've ever been in, 465 00:20:14,006 --> 00:20:15,967 and then all my best friends show up? 466 00:20:16,008 --> 00:20:19,303 - So now that we don't have any upcoming work events 467 00:20:19,345 --> 00:20:21,013 to plan for, 468 00:20:21,055 --> 00:20:24,600 maybe we should all just have a good time together. 469 00:20:24,642 --> 00:20:26,936 I think I'm hallucinating due to lack of sleep. 470 00:20:26,978 --> 00:20:29,897 I feel weirdly empowered by my distorted reality. 471 00:20:29,939 --> 00:20:31,524 I think I'm gonna run for office 472 00:20:31,566 --> 00:20:32,900 when all of this is over. 473 00:20:35,069 --> 00:20:36,404 Uh, cheers. 474 00:20:36,446 --> 00:20:37,405 - Cheers. - Yes. 475 00:20:37,447 --> 00:20:38,990 - OK, I'd vote for you. 476 00:20:39,031 --> 00:20:40,950 - Oh, thanks. 477 00:20:40,992 --> 00:20:43,369 [coughs] Seriously, what is in this? 478 00:20:43,411 --> 00:20:46,998 - Rhubarb, salt, and rocks. 479 00:20:47,039 --> 00:20:49,500 - You know, I'm still really bummed about Unity Day. 480 00:20:49,542 --> 00:20:52,170 I feel like Berlin has given me so much. 481 00:20:52,211 --> 00:20:54,881 I just wish I could give back in some small way. 482 00:20:54,922 --> 00:20:56,716 - Well, I wish you could have the chance to get on stage 483 00:20:56,758 --> 00:20:58,718 at Unity Day to do just that. 484 00:21:00,261 --> 00:21:02,180 - That's all that you need? 485 00:21:02,221 --> 00:21:07,018 Don't you young people know a stage can be anything? 486 00:21:07,060 --> 00:21:09,103 I once performed an entire production 487 00:21:09,145 --> 00:21:11,606 of "Die Fledermaus" on the back of a hearse. 488 00:21:11,647 --> 00:21:13,566 - Wait, Ursula, 489 00:21:13,608 --> 00:21:15,526 are you saying all the world's a stage, 490 00:21:15,568 --> 00:21:17,111 and I'm a freaking player? 491 00:21:17,153 --> 00:21:18,946 [upbeat music] 492 00:21:18,988 --> 00:21:23,493 Guys, I think we gotta give Berlin a little prezzy. 493 00:21:23,534 --> 00:21:27,413 * * 494 00:21:27,455 --> 00:21:31,501 - Luckily for us, my apartment building has a kickass roof. 495 00:21:31,542 --> 00:21:33,795 - Here are the speakers you requested. 496 00:21:33,836 --> 00:21:36,130 My friend Heinrich said we can borrow them. 497 00:21:36,172 --> 00:21:38,299 He's owed me a favor ever since I lent him 498 00:21:38,341 --> 00:21:40,009 one of my cleverest ravens 499 00:21:40,051 --> 00:21:43,221 when he had to solve that witch's riddle. 500 00:21:43,262 --> 00:21:44,931 - All right, Bumper, ready? 501 00:21:44,972 --> 00:21:47,475 My--wee-wee!--fingers are getting tired. 502 00:21:47,517 --> 00:21:51,854 - OK, any advice as my manager before I play? 503 00:21:51,896 --> 00:21:53,106 - No. 504 00:21:53,147 --> 00:21:55,400 But as your friend, blow the freaking windows 505 00:21:55,441 --> 00:21:56,567 out of Berlin! 506 00:21:56,609 --> 00:21:58,236 Oh, and as a volunteer fireman, 507 00:21:58,277 --> 00:21:59,570 please stay away from the edge. 508 00:22:02,657 --> 00:22:04,200 - Nervous. 509 00:22:04,242 --> 00:22:06,285 Guten tag, Berlin! 510 00:22:06,327 --> 00:22:08,329 My name is Bumper Allen. 511 00:22:08,371 --> 00:22:10,206 Ick liebe dick. 512 00:22:10,248 --> 00:22:12,542 - Oh, no, a jumper! 513 00:22:12,583 --> 00:22:15,670 - Close--a Bumper. 514 00:22:18,548 --> 00:22:21,634 [electric sentimental music] 515 00:22:21,676 --> 00:22:26,973 * * 516 00:22:27,014 --> 00:22:29,475 * I'm walking streets that do not know me * 517 00:22:29,517 --> 00:22:34,272 * Passing signs all trying to show me the way back home * 518 00:22:34,313 --> 00:22:36,274 * The way back home * 519 00:22:36,315 --> 00:22:39,736 * A strange man feeling ever more strange * 520 00:22:39,777 --> 00:22:43,364 * And still trying to find a way back home * 521 00:22:43,406 --> 00:22:45,533 * A way back home * 522 00:22:45,575 --> 00:22:47,410 * I am turn, turning * 523 00:22:47,452 --> 00:22:50,246 * Into something different than before * 524 00:22:50,288 --> 00:22:52,498 * 'Cause every turn I'm turning * 525 00:22:52,540 --> 00:22:54,834 * Takes me to your door * 526 00:22:54,876 --> 00:23:01,591 * What if far and away doesn't feel so far? * 527 00:23:01,632 --> 00:23:06,179 * What if home's wherever you are? * 528 00:23:06,220 --> 00:23:09,515 * I'm already home if I'm where you are * 529 00:23:09,557 --> 00:23:12,727 [crowd cheering] 530 00:23:19,734 --> 00:23:21,319 Thank you, Berlin! 531 00:23:21,360 --> 00:23:23,780 Enjoy your morning coffee! 532 00:23:23,821 --> 00:23:25,865 - Whoo! - That was beautiful, Bumper! 533 00:23:25,907 --> 00:23:27,658 I usually dislike love songs, OK? 534 00:23:27,700 --> 00:23:31,788 But I just imagined you were singing to a spider or a bat. 535 00:23:31,829 --> 00:23:34,248 - For sure. - I knew you had it in you. 536 00:23:34,290 --> 00:23:35,917 I'm going to say to you what my own father 537 00:23:35,958 --> 00:23:37,377 will never say to me. 538 00:23:37,418 --> 00:23:40,213 I am so proud of you, my son, Pieter Kramer, 539 00:23:40,254 --> 00:23:43,383 and I think you are smart enough to wear laced shoes. 540 00:23:43,424 --> 00:23:45,259 - OK. Yeah. 541 00:23:47,387 --> 00:23:48,763 - Uh-oh. 542 00:23:48,805 --> 00:23:51,224 - That's fine. I'll go freely. 543 00:23:51,265 --> 00:23:52,767 I will die for my music. 544 00:23:54,727 --> 00:23:56,437 - Thank you. 545 00:23:56,479 --> 00:23:58,064 Well, well, well. 546 00:23:58,106 --> 00:24:00,483 If it isn't Bumper Allen, which it is. 547 00:24:00,525 --> 00:24:02,693 We've been holding Unity Day auditions next door, 548 00:24:02,735 --> 00:24:06,114 and half of our acts left to watch you. 549 00:24:06,155 --> 00:24:07,865 I'm sure that wasn't a coincidence. 550 00:24:07,907 --> 00:24:09,867 - Nope, it wasn't. 551 00:24:09,909 --> 00:24:11,994 I figured if the auditions don't go to us, 552 00:24:12,036 --> 00:24:13,579 we'll go to the auditions. 553 00:24:13,621 --> 00:24:15,248 - Wait a second. 554 00:24:15,289 --> 00:24:16,833 This is not your apartment building? 555 00:24:16,874 --> 00:24:18,251 - Oh, hell no, dog. 556 00:24:18,292 --> 00:24:19,752 I just followed someone in because it's next door 557 00:24:19,794 --> 00:24:21,254 to the Unity Day offices. 558 00:24:21,295 --> 00:24:23,840 We rock and rolled and broke and entered. 559 00:24:23,881 --> 00:24:25,091 - Apparently loud in front of them. 560 00:24:25,133 --> 00:24:26,342 - Yeah, oops. 561 00:24:26,384 --> 00:24:28,845 - Well, it appears Berlin loves your song. 562 00:24:28,886 --> 00:24:30,179 I mean, a lot of those people were 563 00:24:30,221 --> 00:24:32,056 drunk from the night before, - I could tell. 564 00:24:32,098 --> 00:24:33,433 I was drunk when I wrote the song. 565 00:24:33,474 --> 00:24:35,017 - That's true. 566 00:24:35,059 --> 00:24:37,228 - But against all odds, you've generated genuine enthusiasm. 567 00:24:37,270 --> 00:24:39,939 And you may still be a controversial figure, 568 00:24:39,981 --> 00:24:42,191 but it's clear you did a good job with Bumper. 569 00:24:42,233 --> 00:24:43,359 - Yes, he did. 570 00:24:43,401 --> 00:24:45,111 He's a great manager and a great friend. 571 00:24:45,153 --> 00:24:47,780 He knows all the coolest roofs to book me on 572 00:24:47,822 --> 00:24:49,365 and tells me when I have chocolate on my face, 573 00:24:49,407 --> 00:24:50,742 which is a lot. 574 00:24:50,783 --> 00:24:52,785 I eat a chocolate sundae every morning for breakfast. 575 00:24:52,827 --> 00:24:55,455 Classic style. - He does. He shares. 576 00:24:55,496 --> 00:24:57,248 Fine, we both do it. 577 00:24:57,290 --> 00:24:58,708 You've converted me. 578 00:24:58,750 --> 00:25:01,461 - It seems that our country has two deserving newcomer 579 00:25:01,502 --> 00:25:03,087 acts this year. 580 00:25:03,129 --> 00:25:04,797 We'd like to offer you the opportunity 581 00:25:04,839 --> 00:25:07,467 to share the spot with Gisela. 582 00:25:07,508 --> 00:25:09,927 For the first time, we can have two newcomers 583 00:25:09,969 --> 00:25:12,138 in the spirit of unity. 584 00:25:12,180 --> 00:25:13,514 - Yes. 585 00:25:13,556 --> 00:25:16,309 - In the spirit of unity. 586 00:25:16,350 --> 00:25:19,312 Mwah! 587 00:25:19,353 --> 00:25:20,855 I didn't know what to do. - It works. 588 00:25:20,897 --> 00:25:23,941 - I kind of freaked out. - That's fine. Toodles. 589 00:25:23,983 --> 00:25:27,153 [all screaming] 590 00:25:27,195 --> 00:25:28,237 - Oh, my God! 591 00:25:28,279 --> 00:25:30,239 Whoo! 592 00:25:30,281 --> 00:25:32,533 [all screaming] 593 00:25:32,575 --> 00:25:34,160 OK, but seriously, now we have to go because we 594 00:25:34,202 --> 00:25:35,328 did break and enter. - Yeah, OK, yep. 595 00:25:35,369 --> 00:25:36,454 - Oh, yeah. 596 00:25:36,496 --> 00:25:37,663 - Can we just leave everything? 597 00:25:37,705 --> 00:25:40,208 - Just throw it off the side! - OK. 598 00:25:40,249 --> 00:25:42,460 - Oh! I missed it! All right, listen, watch this. 599 00:25:42,502 --> 00:25:44,670 Oh, miss it, miss it, miss it. 600 00:25:44,712 --> 00:25:46,964 [all cheering] 601 00:25:47,006 --> 00:25:48,800 It only took me 15 tries. 602 00:25:48,841 --> 00:25:51,344 Man, hot dogs in Germany are so much more fun 603 00:25:51,386 --> 00:25:52,595 than hot dogs in America. 604 00:25:52,637 --> 00:25:55,306 I love slurping me down some German wieners. 605 00:25:55,348 --> 00:25:57,183 - I still can't believe that my client 606 00:25:57,225 --> 00:26:00,019 has secured the coveted newcomer spot at Unity Day. 607 00:26:00,061 --> 00:26:01,979 You are German like a Grimm brother. 608 00:26:02,021 --> 00:26:03,856 - Wilhelm. - Oh, yes. 609 00:26:03,898 --> 00:26:04,774 - Because I do not mess with Jacob. 610 00:26:04,816 --> 00:26:06,025 - Nasty. 611 00:26:06,067 --> 00:26:06,984 - Yeah, that guy's a psychopath. 612 00:26:07,026 --> 00:26:08,236 - Killed several sheep. 613 00:26:08,277 --> 00:26:09,362 - Man, I freaking love you, dude. 614 00:26:09,404 --> 00:26:10,738 - I love you as well. 615 00:26:14,242 --> 00:26:15,701 That was the first time ever doing that. 616 00:26:15,743 --> 00:26:16,911 - Oh, really? - It was terrible. 617 00:26:16,953 --> 00:26:18,204 I apologize. 618 00:26:18,246 --> 00:26:19,414 - We should, like, practice it or something. 619 00:26:19,455 --> 00:26:20,706 - Allow me to rehearse in the mirror 620 00:26:20,748 --> 00:26:22,208 for several hours tonight. 621 00:26:22,250 --> 00:26:24,544 - You don't have to. - OK. 622 00:26:24,585 --> 00:26:27,213 - I just can't believe we actually did it. 623 00:26:27,255 --> 00:26:28,965 - I can. 624 00:26:29,006 --> 00:26:30,883 I always knew you could. 625 00:26:30,925 --> 00:26:35,263 [sentimental music] 626 00:26:35,304 --> 00:26:37,265 - Heidi, I... 627 00:26:40,476 --> 00:26:43,396 - Bumper Allen. 628 00:26:43,438 --> 00:26:44,689 - Wow. 629 00:26:44,731 --> 00:26:46,899 News of Unity Day must travel fast. 630 00:26:46,941 --> 00:26:48,359 More fans already. 631 00:26:48,401 --> 00:26:50,945 I hope it's not nudes because I don't have my pen. 632 00:26:50,987 --> 00:26:52,405 - Bumper Allen, you are being deported 633 00:26:52,447 --> 00:26:53,781 by the German government. 634 00:26:55,450 --> 00:26:56,534 - Wait, what? 635 00:26:56,576 --> 00:26:59,495 [upbeat rock music] 636 00:26:59,537 --> 00:27:01,914 * * 637 00:27:01,956 --> 00:27:05,293 - *Scheisse! * 638 00:27:05,334 --> 00:27:06,919 * * 639 00:27:06,961 --> 00:27:09,589 *Scheisse! * 640 00:27:09,630 --> 00:27:11,966 * * 641 00:27:12,008 --> 00:27:14,594 *Scheisse! * 642 00:27:14,635 --> 00:27:16,971 * * 643 00:27:17,013 --> 00:27:19,599 *Scheisse! * 644 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,101 * * 645 00:27:22,143 --> 00:27:24,312 *Scheisse! * 646 00:27:24,353 --> 00:27:27,065 * * 647 00:27:27,106 --> 00:27:29,650 *Scheisse! * 648 00:27:29,692 --> 00:27:32,153 * * 649 00:27:32,195 --> 00:27:34,989 *Scheisse! *