1 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:17,400 [man] When you go to prison, 2 00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:21,200 everybody has their titles and stuff for themselves or other people. 3 00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:26,600 People look at, like, an aggravated stalking charge and they laugh about it. 4 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:30,360 They're like, "Oh, you're a stalker? Like, pfft! What kind of shit is that?" 5 00:00:30,440 --> 00:00:32,600 "You're in the bushes with the binoculars?" 6 00:00:32,680 --> 00:00:33,880 "No, like..." 7 00:00:34,760 --> 00:00:38,200 And I could see where some people, that is the case, you know, but... 8 00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:42,000 Everybody's situation is different. 9 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:45,160 So, to people I don't know, I just... 10 00:00:45,240 --> 00:00:46,800 I... I try to laugh it off. 11 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:50,080 Because for me, it brings up a lot of hurt and hard feelings, 12 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:54,400 and it brings up all the trauma that Rachel and I went through. 13 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:12,480 [woman] The only thing that I want clear is... 14 00:01:12,560 --> 00:01:14,840 I might have empathy for John, 15 00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:21,480 but what he did to me, I will never forgive him for. 16 00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:28,600 Just because I understand it, doesn't mean I have to accept it. 17 00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:31,480 I don't accept it. 18 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:34,440 [sniffles] 19 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,200 [man 1] I'd rather be considered a murderer than a stalker, 20 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:47,400 you know what I mean? 21 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:57,200 [woman] I wanted the intensity of, like, of her feeling watched. 22 00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:00,800 [man 2] Anybody could be a stalker. 23 00:02:01,640 --> 00:02:03,440 [man 3] It's all boogeyman talk. 24 00:02:05,280 --> 00:02:07,280 [man 4] I'm not still that crazy. Like...[chuckles] 25 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:49,800 [Anderson] The stalking thing kind of boils down for me as an abandonment issue. 26 00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:57,920 I get hung up on a person because I felt abandoned by them. 27 00:02:58,000 --> 00:03:00,600 It makes me just want to cling on to them more. 28 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:04,680 Then I get angry about it and it's like, "Well, you love me, you should be here." 29 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:08,360 It's anger from being hurt. 30 00:03:09,160 --> 00:03:14,240 And looking back, I can say that was the start of problems 31 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:16,400 that led me to the situation I'm in now. 32 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:22,280 I'm John R. Anderson III. 33 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:26,200 I'm incarcerated at Hill Correction Facility. 34 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:28,440 I've been charged with aggravated stalking. 35 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:35,360 [gentle guitar music playing] 36 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,000 I grew up in the country. 37 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:44,200 My dad taught me how to hunt, fish. 38 00:03:46,120 --> 00:03:48,920 I was good in school, played sports, played baseball a lot. 39 00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:55,240 I think I've always steered towards having a serious relationship. 40 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:58,136 Even when I first started having girlfriends in middle school 41 00:03:58,160 --> 00:03:59,600 and early years in high school, 42 00:03:59,680 --> 00:04:03,040 I was always gettin' flowers or makin' little mix tapes. 43 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:06,600 I was always more... serious. It wasn't like, "We're just hanging out for fun." 44 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:09,880 It was like, "Is there a connection? Some kind of little intimacy?" 45 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:14,280 I'm one of those people. From the start, I can tell if I'm gonna like you or not, 46 00:04:14,360 --> 00:04:17,000 and Rachel and I, we just clicked. 47 00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:20,280 Like, I don't know. We were two peas in a pod. 48 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:43,400 My name is Rachel. 49 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:49,880 I met John in 2015. On a blind date. 50 00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:56,080 I was working, like, three jobs at the time 51 00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:59,640 and I was raising my son by myself. 52 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:02,240 So I wasn't interested in 53 00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:04,920 any kind of relationship, really. 54 00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:12,840 John's very funny and very witty, and... 55 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:17,480 at that point in time, he had a Harley-Davidson motorcycle. 56 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:21,120 He was, like, my type of man. 57 00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:24,120 And I always told him that it was his green eyes that... 58 00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:27,840 got me that very first night. 59 00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:33,040 It's not something that we just jumped into. 60 00:05:33,120 --> 00:05:35,200 We were gonna take this slow, 61 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:38,240 because I wanted to get to know the person before, 62 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:40,520 like, bringing my son into the situation. 63 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:47,560 There was a lot of give and take in the beginning, 64 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:49,960 because he's a diesel mechanic, 65 00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:52,920 so he worked six days a week, ten-hour days. 66 00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:57,360 He was always going out with his friends, and was always around girls, 67 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:01,360 and his friends were always trying to get him to party all the time. 68 00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:05,680 I didn't know that he was drinking all the time. 69 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:08,240 I just thought that it was a weekend type of thing. 70 00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:11,880 I didn't do that. I worked and went home to my kid. 71 00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:15,640 But he was always good with Gauge. 72 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:19,760 Like, Gauge looked at him like he was his father. 73 00:06:31,280 --> 00:06:34,280 Gauge was just an infectious child. Like, he... 74 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:37,080 He was my little rock star, you know? 75 00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:40,880 He... I gave him a little Mohawk, and he'd throw up the little rock horns 76 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:42,880 and he'd ride on my Harley with me. 77 00:06:42,960 --> 00:06:45,880 And it was great, but... 78 00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:49,720 I'd have Gauge with me, and people would say things to me. 79 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:51,840 "Who's that kid you got with you, John?" 80 00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:54,120 For me, at first, it mattered. 81 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,840 But the more that I fell in love with Gauge, like, 82 00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:58,600 the more it became irritating. 83 00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:00,800 Like, "This is my kid. What are you talking about?" 84 00:07:06,240 --> 00:07:10,440 [Rachel] It was one of those relationships where if I was chasing John, 85 00:07:10,520 --> 00:07:11,760 he was backing off. 86 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:14,280 And if he was chasing me, I was backing off. 87 00:07:14,800 --> 00:07:17,400 So as soon as I'd tell him, "Okay, I'm done," 88 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:21,960 he'd be at my door at 11 o'clock at night, telling me how sorry he was. 89 00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:23,840 But we were just so... 90 00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:26,760 I don't know, in... 91 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:29,120 dumb love, I guess. 92 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:34,200 We stayed together through all of that and then... 93 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:36,880 I found out I was pregnant. 94 00:07:37,920 --> 00:07:39,680 [birdsong] 95 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:46,360 At that time, we were looking at moving to Arkansas. 96 00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:51,640 His uncle lives in Arkansas, so we went to go visit him. 97 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:56,160 It is just a beautiful place, 98 00:07:56,240 --> 00:08:00,120 and so we started looking for houses down there. 99 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:20,440 [Rachel] After Jax was born, we were going down to Arkansas, 100 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:22,840 staying there at his uncle's house, 101 00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:27,560 just trying to complete the contract with the lady that was selling us the house. 102 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:33,640 And Jax was only four months old when Gauge died. 103 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,080 [birdsong] 104 00:08:39,920 --> 00:08:42,480 [Anderson] To this day, I don't have an answer what happened. 105 00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:46,960 There was a storm, and some trees had blown over. 106 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:51,000 We were usin' the loader tractor to move the trees 107 00:08:51,080 --> 00:08:53,320 off the fence on the horse pasture. 108 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:54,760 Gauge was helpin' me. 109 00:08:55,840 --> 00:08:59,800 He, um... he fell off the tractor, and I accidentally ran him over. 110 00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:02,920 Uh... 111 00:09:09,680 --> 00:09:11,720 Rachel was there when it happened. 112 00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:15,920 She was just up at the house, and she came down and she was holding him. 113 00:09:16,480 --> 00:09:18,800 She could still feel his heartbeat and stuff. 114 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:22,520 We just couldn't get the ambulance there fast enough 115 00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:25,040 and we couldn't get him to the hospital fast enough. 116 00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:27,160 Uh... 117 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,560 So Gauge... Gauge isn't no more with us. 118 00:09:33,680 --> 00:09:38,560 She knows I'm a very careful, safe kind of person. Um... 119 00:09:39,280 --> 00:09:43,000 I've been a diesel mechanic my whole life. I've been around tractors, ag equipment, 120 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:45,160 combines, construction equipment. 121 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:50,760 So, like, she knows it wasn't a matter of me bein' reckless or... or doin' anything... 122 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:54,200 unsafe with him on the tractor. 123 00:09:54,280 --> 00:09:56,720 But instantly... 124 00:09:57,920 --> 00:10:00,760 I... I felt responsible and guilty, 125 00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:03,840 and, you know, I felt like I just killed my son. 126 00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:07,360 We, uh... 127 00:10:08,920 --> 00:10:10,520 We lost our child. 128 00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:13,760 And... 129 00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:17,800 [sniffles] 130 00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:20,040 And both of us became different people. 131 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:33,160 After Gauge died, I, um... 132 00:10:37,240 --> 00:10:40,280 I turned into, like, a shell of a person. 133 00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:48,200 It's very difficult to explain, I guess. Um... 134 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:49,480 [sniffles] 135 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:53,560 I didn't wanna do anything. I didn't wanna eat, I didn't wanna... 136 00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:58,440 I couldn't hold Jax at all. 137 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:03,320 I think he could just feel how heartbroken I was. 138 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:04,440 [sniffles] 139 00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:07,280 Because he would scream, I mean... 140 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:14,000 So John had to take on all of that responsibility 141 00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:19,000 for a four-month-old child and me, 142 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:21,960 because I couldn't do it. 143 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:23,520 [sniffles] 144 00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:27,800 He really did try before he fell apart. 145 00:11:48,720 --> 00:11:52,840 [Rachel] John was working for the first, I think, year. 146 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:57,040 And it got to a point where he wasn't getting enough jobs 147 00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,200 to be able to support us. 148 00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:01,640 So I had to go get a job. 149 00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:15,960 John then started to find friends, 150 00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:19,720 and those friends were doing drugs. 151 00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:23,760 He was starting to smoke... 152 00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:27,000 I don't know if it was crack first or meth. 153 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,600 And I'd sit there and watch him do it. 154 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:36,440 I understood why he was trying to numb the pain. 155 00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:41,560 The guilt of... he could have prevented the accident. 156 00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,840 That's a lot for somebody to have to... 157 00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:47,560 deal with. 158 00:12:51,920 --> 00:12:55,040 [Anderson] My addiction really kicked into overdrive. 159 00:12:59,960 --> 00:13:03,560 I was usin' meth, and I was... I was bad on meth. 160 00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:07,120 I'd never experienced nothin' like it. I... 161 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:08,640 I, uh... 162 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:11,960 I was hallucinating things, and... 163 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:18,840 I couldn't... I couldn't close my eyes without seeing his face. 164 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:22,600 [breathing shakily] Um... 165 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:26,240 Poor Rachel, she just... she shut down. 166 00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:29,880 She didn't... She just... She shut down. 167 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:34,440 And we went on like this for about a year and a half. 168 00:13:35,360 --> 00:13:40,160 Neither one of us took time to seek out help, or counseling, or... 169 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:42,680 or anything to help work through it. 170 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:46,280 And... 171 00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:49,320 as much as we needed each other, 172 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:52,560 I feel like we just pushed each other apart. 173 00:13:58,560 --> 00:14:00,960 [Rachel] When they say things can't get worse in your life, 174 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:02,480 well, they really can. 175 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:08,280 With me not being able to function, 176 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:11,840 I guess I wasn't giving him what he needed. 177 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:19,320 So he found a girl that worked at the docks on the lake. 178 00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:21,360 And... 179 00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:24,200 cheated on me with her. 180 00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:28,960 I think she was 19 years old. 181 00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:32,360 And at that time, John was 35. 182 00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:34,920 She was very young. 183 00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:40,800 And I told him that he wasn't gonna ruin our family, that we can fix it. 184 00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:45,120 And that was the first time he hit me. 185 00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:50,880 He hit me across the face so hard that I hit the floor, 186 00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:55,920 and then he took my keys and left for the night. 187 00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:02,800 At this point, John was seeing and hearing people 188 00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,200 because he was strung out on meth. 189 00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:11,520 He'd go to the bathroom or something, and he would leave his phone on record. 190 00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:14,320 And he would listen to the recordings, 191 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:19,120 and scream at me and yell at me that I was cheating on him 192 00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:23,440 when it was the TV that was talking. 193 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,520 After that, it just got worse. 194 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:33,480 [heavy string music playing] 195 00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:47,120 [Rachel] It was my birthday that he swore he heard a man's voice in the garage. 196 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:54,600 He picked me up in the kitchen by my neck, 197 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:59,600 drug me down the hall, and threw me on the bed... 198 00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:07,600 and proceeded to hit me in my ribs, my chest, my legs, and my head. 199 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,240 And choked me to the point where I threw up. 200 00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:20,240 It was that moment where I knew that I just had to get away from him. 201 00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:23,440 That he wasn't gonna change. He wasn't gonna get any better. 202 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:27,160 I just made my mind up, and I couldn't stay another second. 203 00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:32,000 [ethereal music playing] 204 00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:52,920 [Rachel] I felt a sense of relief on the eight-hour drive to Illinois... 205 00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:56,840 knowing that I wasn't gonna have to deal with him. 206 00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:09,120 [Anderson] Everything that I was doin' to Rachel after I started doin' meth, 207 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:12,760 I felt like she was doin' it back to me, and it wasn't true at all. 208 00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:15,240 Like, it was just my own mind playing tricks on me. 209 00:17:16,400 --> 00:17:17,400 And... 210 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:21,760 it ended up bringing a lot of violence in between with Rachel and I. 211 00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:24,920 But when she left, 212 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:29,840 I felt that I had just lost another child and my wife. 213 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:37,800 It was like, with all the hurt and pain that I was carryin', that just hurt more. 214 00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:41,560 And it just... it was so overwhelming, I don't even know how to explain it. 215 00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:46,520 I felt betrayed, really. 216 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:50,960 And then I became so obsessed with, "Where's my son?" 217 00:17:53,960 --> 00:17:57,320 I would try to ask friends and family where she went. Nobody would tell me. 218 00:17:57,400 --> 00:18:01,120 They would lie to me and tell me, "Oh, she's... she's somewhere down there." 219 00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,256 "She's safe," or whatever. So I'm gettin' aggravated. 220 00:18:03,280 --> 00:18:04,960 Rachel won't talk to me. I'm aggravated. 221 00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:08,160 Like, she was doin' it just to take my son from me and hurt me. 222 00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:10,760 [uneasy music playing] 223 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:16,240 [Rachel] By that time, John had figured out that I wasn't in Arkansas anymore. 224 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:20,360 So he started sending me text messages. 225 00:18:26,360 --> 00:18:29,680 He was telling me that he was gonna pour my son down the toilet 226 00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:36,160 if I didn't tell him where I was and bring his family back to him. 227 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,360 He started sending me videos of him 228 00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:56,200 pouring white ashes down the toilet. 229 00:18:56,280 --> 00:19:00,240 And of course, I freaked out and had a panic attack. 230 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:19,560 After he did that, I just... There was... 231 00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:23,200 That was the end. That was it. I got a restraining order. 232 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:54,040 [man] For most stalking cases, before they're called a crime, 233 00:19:54,120 --> 00:19:56,320 there has to be a protection order in place. 234 00:19:57,160 --> 00:20:01,360 It's the first step from going from a non-criminal behavior 235 00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:02,840 to a criminal behavior. 236 00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:09,400 My name is Ryan Williams. 237 00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:12,360 I'm an associate professor of criminology and criminal justice 238 00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:14,600 at the University of Illinois in Springfield. 239 00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:31,720 [Williams] Orders of protection can be very helpful. 240 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:34,480 It escalates the seriousness of the offense. 241 00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:37,720 A small misdemeanor to now automatic felony. 242 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:42,960 So before when you drove by their work, it was mischievous, it was problematic. 243 00:20:43,040 --> 00:20:44,360 Now it's a felony. 244 00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:49,920 But protection orders are based on a deterrent model of behavior. 245 00:20:51,160 --> 00:20:55,360 Unfortunately, a lot of stalking behavior is done by people 246 00:20:55,440 --> 00:20:59,160 who aren't acting rationally, who don't have much to lose. 247 00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:03,880 Like in John's case, you can just ignore the orders completely, 248 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:06,400 and feel that they don't apply to you whatsoever. 249 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:25,240 [Williams] John exhibited very serious behaviors 250 00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:28,160 prior, with his other relationships. 251 00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:31,840 It's someone who just won't accept 252 00:21:33,160 --> 00:21:35,440 that their behavior is harmful. 253 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:39,000 To the point where I'm surprised 254 00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:43,400 that there weren't worse outcomes in all of these cases. 255 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:57,920 [man] If John can't control women, 256 00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:02,200 then anger and aggression and all that stuff comes out. 257 00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:06,840 Each time it's escalated, and that scares me. 258 00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:11,440 There's always a stick of dynamite in there somewhere. 259 00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:17,720 My name is Rick Anderson, and I'm John's uncle. 260 00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:23,080 And, as of this date, I am the only relative that'll talk to John. 261 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:38,920 [Rick] When John was younger, John and his first wife were married. 262 00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:43,840 But John cheated on her during the wedding. 263 00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:47,280 His wife just said enough's enough. 264 00:22:47,360 --> 00:22:48,600 She moved out. 265 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:51,240 John kind of snapped. 266 00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:56,240 And back then, when he got mad, he would show up at your house. 267 00:22:56,320 --> 00:23:00,160 Or just sit in a car and wait for you to come out of work. 268 00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:02,680 Kind of like the beginning of stalking. 269 00:23:23,040 --> 00:23:26,280 [Rick] He broke into her house, hid in the closet, 270 00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:28,560 and at two o'clock in the mornin', 271 00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:31,000 was standin' at the end of the bed of the girl. 272 00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:36,920 So all relationships with his first wife and his second girlfriend 273 00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,040 just broke and fractured. 274 00:23:42,360 --> 00:23:45,200 If I was Rachel even now, 275 00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:47,880 I would be worried about John. 276 00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:20,000 [Judi] John wanted Rachel back, 277 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,800 and he would do anything and anything to get her back. 278 00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:28,280 He knew how much Rachel and I had a bond together. 279 00:24:28,360 --> 00:24:31,520 And if he couldn't have her, no one would. 280 00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:43,680 [dog barking] 281 00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:48,400 [Judi] When he first got up here, he called repetitively. 282 00:24:48,480 --> 00:24:52,520 But it comes up as somebody else on the phone. 283 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,400 This is how freakin' smart this idiot is. 284 00:24:57,120 --> 00:25:00,080 He'd call me, "Let me talk to her. Just let me talk to her." 285 00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:02,080 "I love her. I want to talk to her." 286 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:06,880 And then he'd curse. "I know she's there. Let me talk to her." 287 00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:10,160 "You're a fuckin' bitch. Let me talk to her now." 288 00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:13,680 I mean, it's scary. It's totally scary. 289 00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:22,560 He's stalking the house. 290 00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:34,000 He'd pull up in the driveway, it was winter, in his big-ass truck. 291 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,360 Sits there, spins the tires. 292 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:42,240 We're freakin' out, cryin', callin' the cops. 293 00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:46,840 I'm lookin' for Jax. He's under the table. 294 00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:51,680 He said, "Grandma, I did what Mommy told me. I hid." 295 00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:54,200 "I hid like Mommy tells me." 296 00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:56,320 It broke my heart. 297 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,040 That my grandson has to hide 298 00:26:00,120 --> 00:26:02,960 'cause Mommy's tellin' him to hide from him, 299 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:06,640 because he's gonna hurt and kill his mother. [sniffles] 300 00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:13,240 It's painful to watch your daughter go through that. 301 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:30,400 [Rachel] It was just an always constant, like, "He's watching me." 302 00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:34,240 Like, "He knows when I'm home, he knows when I'm not home." 303 00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:38,960 It's a lot of mind control and a lot of... fear. 304 00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:44,320 I mean, it's always continuous, non-stop calling, texting. 305 00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:49,600 He would, um... leave me voicemails telling me he's gonna kill himself. 306 00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:53,960 He would send me pictures of, uh... nooses 307 00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:58,480 that he had hanging from the rafters in his mom's basement. 308 00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:03,200 He told me that when we die, we die together, 309 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:06,160 and it doesn't matter if he has to shoot me in the head first, 310 00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:09,520 that he will, we will die together. 311 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:15,600 I always felt like he was right around the corner, 312 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:20,280 like I'm on my toes waiting for him to just jump out of the bushes. 313 00:27:21,680 --> 00:27:24,320 And that's basically what happened. 314 00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:31,960 She wouldn't answer her phone. I... 315 00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:34,680 I'd get to the point where I'd go online, 316 00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:37,680 there's apps online where you can use different caller numbers, 317 00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:39,480 this and that, different phone numbers. 318 00:27:39,560 --> 00:27:41,200 And I was doin' all that crazy shit. 319 00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:45,320 But she wouldn't talk to me. So I went to her work. 320 00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:00,640 When she pulled up into her work, I was sittin' there. 321 00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:03,080 I'd got there, like, two minutes before she did, 322 00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:06,240 and, uh... I'd walked up to the vehicle, 323 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:09,320 and as soon as she'd seen me, she was just instantly scared. 324 00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:14,120 And for whatever reason, that just triggered, like, anger in me. 325 00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:20,200 And it was just a bad scene at her work, and the cops ended up comin'. 326 00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:31,680 The warehouse I was working at, there wasn't a gate. 327 00:28:31,760 --> 00:28:33,520 Anybody could just go in and out. 328 00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:38,880 I had pulled into the parking lot 329 00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:42,320 and was grabbing my stuff to go inside the building. 330 00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:45,880 There's a car, and it's just sitting there... 331 00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:50,680 and he's running full force at my vehicle. 332 00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:58,280 So I'm trying to lock my truck and call 911 at the same time. 333 00:28:58,360 --> 00:29:03,840 By that point, he's trying to break my driver side window, 334 00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:07,640 screaming at the top of his voice, 335 00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:10,160 basically that he was gonna fucking kill me. 336 00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:15,840 He goes back to the back passenger door and gets it open. 337 00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:21,880 I jump out of the vehicle, screaming for somebody to help me, 338 00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:24,920 and I saw a man in his car. 339 00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:26,840 And I'm running to him. 340 00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:30,760 He's getting out of the vehicle, you know, calmly asking me what's wrong, 341 00:29:30,840 --> 00:29:32,920 and I'm like, "He's gonna... he's gonna kill me." 342 00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:38,480 At that point, John figured out that I left the keys in the truck. 343 00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:43,880 So he's trying to come run me over. 344 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:53,680 He figured out he couldn't get to me without running into other vehicles. 345 00:29:53,760 --> 00:29:56,200 So he got back out of the vehicle, 346 00:29:56,280 --> 00:29:58,840 still screaming at me that he was gonna kill me. 347 00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:03,520 The guy tackled him to the ground and held him there. 348 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:41,720 [Rachel] After the police came and arrested him, 349 00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:45,440 I felt relief like I've never felt it before. 350 00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:51,560 He... finally wasn't able to come and hurt me. 351 00:30:56,120 --> 00:30:57,560 Oh... I was free. 352 00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:00,720 I was free from him. 353 00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:05,240 I was free from all of it. 354 00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:33,040 [woman] Stalking, especially in domestic violence in relationships, 355 00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:36,960 does not necessarily get the attention that it should get. 356 00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:43,520 It's overlooked in the law and how it's treated. 357 00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:49,560 It's a matter of "What are we going to do to make sure that this behavior stops?" 358 00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:54,880 My name is Ali Friend. 359 00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:58,920 I was the lead prosecutor in the domestic violence unit 360 00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:00,440 in DeKalb County. 361 00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:17,320 [Friend] It's hard for me to know what was going through John's mind, 362 00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:19,120 as far as why he did what he did. 363 00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:22,960 But I think he was just wanting to do anything possible 364 00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:25,720 to regain control over Rachel's life. 365 00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:29,760 And if that meant taking her life, then that's what was gonna happen. 366 00:32:33,080 --> 00:32:35,920 He brought a nylon strap 367 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:39,640 that was fashioned in a way that looked like a noose. 368 00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:45,480 There was several acts of strangulation that had occurred 369 00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:47,800 while they were living in Arkansas. 370 00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:53,480 It seemed as though he was going to finally follow through 371 00:32:53,560 --> 00:32:57,320 on his original threats when he used to strangle her in the past. 372 00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:23,800 [Friend] Aggravated stalking is punishable by up to two to five years 373 00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:26,120 in the Illinois Department of Corrections. 374 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:28,600 Or a period of probation. 375 00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:34,200 I believed that probation was not an appropriate outcome for him, 376 00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:38,680 and I believed that he needed to be removed and punished and sent to prison. 377 00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:43,880 So he was also charged with aggravated driving under the influence. 378 00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:49,040 Because aggravated DUI, in our state, carries the most serious penalty, 379 00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:09,480 It is hard to believe that stalking is a lower felony offense than a DUI. 380 00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:16,040 I just think that nobody wants to believe that it's that bad. 381 00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:20,400 But for a victim or a survivor who's in that relationship, 382 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:24,040 it is that bad and one day could lead to death. 383 00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:02,600 [birdsong] 384 00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,640 [Rachel] I get letters from John every day 385 00:35:12,720 --> 00:35:18,840 to the point where it is very odd if I don't get a letter a day. 386 00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:24,840 We are not talking. 387 00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:29,080 I don't respond to him, and I just continue to get pictures and letters, 388 00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:30,720 and it's just never-ending. 389 00:35:33,240 --> 00:35:35,320 It is very conflicting to get the letters 390 00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:38,200 and to decide whether I'm gonna open them or not. 391 00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:41,920 But now, with him being in prison, reading the letters, 392 00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:44,280 I know what's going on inside of his head. 393 00:35:44,360 --> 00:35:47,600 and it's easier for me to, I guess, sleep at night 394 00:35:48,120 --> 00:35:54,720 knowing that he is apologetic instead of... still angry with me. 395 00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:12,680 [Anderson] I've always wrote Rachel letters. 396 00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:15,560 2020, I wrote her a letter, like, every day, like... 397 00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:17,520 Or not every day. Every week, I mean. 398 00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,720 I'm not still that crazy. [chuckles] Like, every week. 399 00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:21,960 Just to stay in contact. And I know she reads 'em. 400 00:36:22,040 --> 00:36:23,040 I know she gets 'em. 401 00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:27,160 I figure, you know, if she... if she wants to turn 'em in and get me in trouble, 402 00:36:27,240 --> 00:36:28,840 then... then so be it, you know? 403 00:36:28,920 --> 00:36:32,680 If that's her prerogative and what she feels she needs to do, then so be it. 404 00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:56,560 [Anderson] I didn't go to prison and forget about my son. 405 00:36:56,640 --> 00:36:59,680 I get to talk to him on the phone, and he... he's funny, 'cause he's like, 406 00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:02,640 "I don't know you. I don't... I don't know what you look like." 407 00:37:02,720 --> 00:37:06,520 I gotta remind him, like, "You do know. Like, I was there raising you." 408 00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:09,360 "You know, you were... you were two when I last seen you." 409 00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:12,760 "I'm sorry that you don't remember that, but trust me, I remember." 410 00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:24,280 My goal was to be home by Jax's fifth birthday, which was last Sunday. 411 00:37:24,880 --> 00:37:27,920 And, you know, I made it a week later. 412 00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:30,680 I go home next... Today's Friday, I go home Monday. 413 00:37:50,600 --> 00:37:52,080 [birdsong] 414 00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:06,160 [Rachel] John's release day is coming, and he wants to see his son. 415 00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:11,520 When John finally sees Jax 416 00:38:11,600 --> 00:38:16,640 and is able to, like, keep him overnight or for the weekend, 417 00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:21,280 it is a concern that he will just run away with my child, 418 00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:23,600 and I won't ever find him. 419 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:26,520 That's always in the back of my mind. 420 00:38:29,040 --> 00:38:31,320 I'm hoping he can turn over a new leaf. 421 00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:35,840 But I'm worried about him going back to the old John 422 00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:38,640 and coming to try to hurt me again. 423 00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:45,600 I feel that if he reverts back to the drugs, 424 00:38:45,680 --> 00:38:50,440 that he'll feel that he doesn't have a reason to live anymore, 425 00:38:50,520 --> 00:38:54,520 and then that means that he would be coming for me also. 426 00:38:56,760 --> 00:38:58,760 I did obtain security cameras. 427 00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:00,760 I have cameras around my house 428 00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:04,840 to make sure that he is not stalking me again 429 00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:08,440 or trying to tamper with my vehicle. 430 00:39:10,720 --> 00:39:12,440 He gets one chance. 431 00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:18,720 If he steps out of line one more time, he'll end up going back to jail. 432 00:39:20,080 --> 00:39:21,160 That'll be that. 433 00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:39,880 [plaintive piano music playing] 434 00:39:54,400 --> 00:39:56,400 [birdsong] 435 00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:02,840 [Anderson] You know, a lot of people like to say that people don't really change. 436 00:40:06,120 --> 00:40:09,680 But if you're a person that's went through some traumatic events, 437 00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:12,120 those shouldn't determine who you are forever. 438 00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:16,760 I'm not the same person that I used to be. 439 00:40:20,240 --> 00:40:22,120 I just... I'm ready to see my family. 440 00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:44,920 [Anderson] It's been two weeks since I've been released and, honestly, 441 00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:47,120 I don't have a solid plan yet. 442 00:40:47,960 --> 00:40:49,560 Uh, I'm still working on that. 443 00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:52,360 My biggest plan is, right now... 444 00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:55,720 is just to get back into bein' a part of my son's life. 445 00:41:12,560 --> 00:41:15,240 [Anderson] I'm ecstatic to be able to spend time with my son. 446 00:41:15,760 --> 00:41:17,520 He's five years old. 447 00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:19,680 He's, um... he's full of spit and vinegar. 448 00:41:19,760 --> 00:41:23,600 It's just... it's heartwarming, you know, to see my son again. 449 00:41:23,680 --> 00:41:26,720 It gives me... gives me somethin' to look forward to. 450 00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:31,720 With that being said, on the days I don't see him, 451 00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:33,960 I get sad because I don't have him. 452 00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:38,000 Before all this started, we were all one family. 453 00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:40,400 I had my son in the house with me all the time. 454 00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:43,600 And now, here I am, a few years later, 455 00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:47,160 and I just get to see my son a couple times a week. 456 00:41:48,920 --> 00:41:52,480 I wanna make sure that Rachel and I are there raisin' him together. 457 00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:57,760 I don't think it's far-fetched that, at some point, 458 00:41:57,840 --> 00:42:02,040 I would like to have my family back together all in one household again, 459 00:42:02,120 --> 00:42:03,120 as a family. 460 00:42:03,560 --> 00:42:07,680 It's just, I think that it'll take proof of action on my part 461 00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:10,840 to show that people can grow and change throughout their life. 462 00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:28,000 [birdsong] 463 00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:46,760 [Rachel] Having John out of prison is definitely... different. 464 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,800 It's been a little over 90 days now, I think. 465 00:42:55,800 --> 00:42:59,600 I know that John wants us to be a family again... 466 00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:04,040 but you can't go back to the past. 467 00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:09,120 There's just too much scars and everything's broken. 468 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:20,160 Hopefully, John can stay sober and stay wanting to better his life. 469 00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:26,840 And if John is willing to step up to the plate, 470 00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:29,760 then he can be a father to Jax. 471 00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:36,360 I hope that me and him can become friends for our son's sake, 472 00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:38,920 because every child needs their father. 473 00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:44,760 But he will have to change a lot about himself 474 00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:47,880 and his addictions in order to do so. 475 00:43:50,520 --> 00:43:51,760 Only time will tell. 476 00:44:05,640 --> 00:44:11,600 [somber string music playing]