1
00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:07,966
[rock music playing]

2
00:00:08,591 --> 00:00:12,679
So... what's the deal?
Are we doing this or not?

3
00:00:12,762 --> 00:00:14,055
I don't know.

4
00:00:14,139 --> 00:00:15,724
I'm literally wearing <i>this</i>.

5
00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:18,226
Yeah, they're daring us to do it.

6
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:21,146
Yeah, they didn't think
that messaging through.

7
00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:23,732
Bro, does this count as a lighter?

8
00:00:23,815 --> 00:00:25,025
Uh, yeah.

9
00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:29,237
I don't know if I can do this.
I'm from a famous family.

10
00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:31,698
My cousin did Brett Favre's bathroom.

11
00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:35,243
I'm sorry. I can't do
your Brett Favre bathroom story again.

12
00:00:37,078 --> 00:00:38,955
Guys, we learned about this
in health class.

13
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,540
I think we should just say...

14
00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:42,124
Whoa.

15
00:00:43,001 --> 00:00:45,628
- Babe, are you feeling it?
- I don't think so.

16
00:00:46,463 --> 00:00:49,424
Why is Donkey Kong
a gorilla and not a donkey?

17
00:00:51,342 --> 00:00:52,510
It's a lie.

18
00:00:53,762 --> 00:00:57,057
They based their entire empire on a lie.

19
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,810
Yeah, I'm not feeling it either.

20
00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:06,316
[snaps]

21
00:01:08,693 --> 00:01:09,694
Interesting.

22
00:01:10,653 --> 00:01:12,864
Dude, these old flannels are so dope.

23
00:01:13,948 --> 00:01:17,452
Those are my grandpa's flannels.
He's married to what's-her-name.

24
00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:21,039
Wait... What's her name?!

25
00:01:21,998 --> 00:01:23,208
Hey, who am I?

26
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,002
Your grandpa's body. [chuckles]

27
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,797
It was there. It was gone.

28
00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:31,341
Just like love.

29
00:01:32,383 --> 00:01:35,553
Leia, do you want to hear about
the Donkey Kong conspiracy?

30
00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:37,847
[whispers] He's a gorilla!

31
00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,351
It's kinda like how Sheryl Crow
isn't actually a crow.

32
00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:43,853
Totally.

33
00:01:45,522 --> 00:01:47,273
Grandpa's body's hungry.

34
00:01:49,025 --> 00:01:50,985
I'll get snacks. What do you guys want?

35
00:01:51,528 --> 00:01:52,570
Raisin Bran.

36
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,447
Raisin Bran.

37
00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:55,615
[both] Raisin Bran!

38
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:57,241
On it.

39
00:02:00,036 --> 00:02:01,371
Wait, what was I getting?

40
00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:03,478
[young woman] <i>One, two, three, four!</i>

41
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:05,125
<i>♪ Hangin' out down the street ♪</i>

42
00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:07,127
<i>♪ The same old thing we did last week ♪</i>

43
00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:11,673
<i>♪ Not a thing to do but talk to you ♪</i>

44
00:02:11,756 --> 00:02:12,756
<i>♪ We're all all right! ♪</i>

45
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:14,509
<i>♪ We're all all right! ♪</i>

46
00:02:14,592 --> 00:02:17,137
[young woman] <i>Hello, Wisconsin!</i>

47
00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:21,224
Well, I just... I don't know
what to do with my evenings anymore

48
00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:23,476
with these summer reruns.

49
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:26,980
I would murder someone
for a fresh <i>Party of Five</i>.

50
00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:30,108
If I have to sit through
another<i> Grace Under Fire</i> rerun,

51
00:02:30,608 --> 00:02:31,901
I'm gonna root for the fire.

52
00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:37,699
Kitty, I've got the first haul
from my vegetable garden.

53
00:02:37,782 --> 00:02:38,825
[Red chuckles]

54
00:02:38,908 --> 00:02:40,535
Show us your harvest.

55
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:48,042
[laughs] Wow!

56
00:02:48,626 --> 00:02:49,878
[chuckles]

57
00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:54,549
I am gonna just slice this up
and put it on some burgers.

58
00:02:55,383 --> 00:02:56,593
Doll burgers.

59
00:02:57,177 --> 00:03:00,597
- What are you doing out of the basement?
- Calling it like I see it.

60
00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:05,185
Oh, here's the kitchen. Wild.

61
00:03:06,686 --> 00:03:07,770
Hi!

62
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,190
Clearly.

63
00:03:11,357 --> 00:03:15,153
So... you having fun downstairs
with your new friends?

64
00:03:15,236 --> 00:03:17,280
It's everything I've ever wanted.

65
00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:18,865
Besides Raisin Bran.

66
00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:20,533
Oh, I think we're all out.

67
00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:22,076
What?!

68
00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,287
But I... I promised Raisin Bran.

69
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:28,791
If I don't find some Raisin B,
I'm gonna be alone again!

70
00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:31,044
Are you okay?

71
00:03:31,711 --> 00:03:35,673
[upbeat 8-bit video game music playing]

72
00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:41,054
Well, now, who wouldn't want
to be your friend?

73
00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:42,847
You are smart and charming.

74
00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:46,226
In fact, you deserve a cookie.

75
00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:53,942
[Red] If any of those kids give you guff,

76
00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:56,861
I will grab them
by the back of their collar

77
00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:59,239
- and toss them into next week.
- [video game beep]

78
00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:00,823
[chuckles]

79
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:04,160
That's right. He can do it too,
now that his shoulder is healed.

80
00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:05,661
Which reminds me,

81
00:04:05,703 --> 00:04:08,456
are you gonna be able to drive me
to physical therapy tomorrow?

82
00:04:10,166 --> 00:04:13,294
Oh. I'm getting my hair done. [laughs]

83
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:14,504
But I'll make it work.

84
00:04:14,587 --> 00:04:17,590
Now, dance with me, you big gorilla.

85
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:19,342
[Red laughs]

86
00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:22,178
Okay. Good talk.

87
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:26,057
[rock music playing]

88
00:04:27,016 --> 00:04:29,936
- I think this is Leia's room.
- Yeah. Where is she?

89
00:04:30,019 --> 00:04:31,020
[Jay] Huh.

90
00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:34,065
Pretty sensible sleepwear.

91
00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:37,402
Oh no. She's got high blood pressure.

92
00:04:38,736 --> 00:04:40,405
It's her grandparents' room.

93
00:04:43,074 --> 00:04:45,243
Holding this has become less exciting.

94
00:04:47,829 --> 00:04:49,247
It's the mother lode!

95
00:04:49,914 --> 00:04:50,914
I'm goin' in.

96
00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:54,335
Oh, you'd look so good in this, babe.

97
00:04:55,211 --> 00:04:56,921
Like a hot lumberjack.

98
00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,674
Makes me wanna do stuff with you
in the woods.

99
00:04:59,757 --> 00:05:00,757
[gulps]

100
00:05:01,384 --> 00:05:02,593
I just pitched a tent.

101
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,722
Bro, this will make it go away.

102
00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:10,476
This is mine now.

103
00:05:11,352 --> 00:05:13,313
Oh, here you guys are.
In my grandparents' room.

104
00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:15,481
The room I've never dared
set foot in my whole life.

105
00:05:15,565 --> 00:05:17,984
- Is it cool that we're up here?
- Yeah, I'm cool.

106
00:05:18,067 --> 00:05:22,071
It's the summer. Let's have fun.
We should do whatever we want. Right?

107
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,156
Wrong.

108
00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:29,829
- Buh-bye now.
- Get out.

109
00:05:29,912 --> 00:05:31,581
- See you soon.
- Get out.

110
00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:33,875
- Don't be a stranger.
- Get out.

111
00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:35,126
Extra icing.

112
00:05:35,209 --> 00:05:36,836
That was mine.

113
00:05:36,919 --> 00:05:40,089
- We never lock the sliding door.
- We do now.

114
00:05:42,717 --> 00:05:44,177
I'm sorry, Grandpa.

115
00:05:44,260 --> 00:05:47,180
Look, I lived through this once before.

116
00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:49,533
And I'm not gonna do this again
without some ground rules.

117
00:05:49,557 --> 00:05:51,851
So you tell your friends,

118
00:05:51,934 --> 00:05:56,105
no eating my food, no drinking my drinks,

119
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,774
and if they go in my room,

120
00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:00,651
my foot goes in their ass.

121
00:06:01,402 --> 00:06:04,864
You know, people keep all kinds of
private things in their bedroom.

122
00:06:04,947 --> 00:06:10,495
My father kept a whip hidden
in my parents' room in case of a burglar.

123
00:06:10,578 --> 00:06:14,749
Also, he had a pair of furry handcuffs,
in case...

124
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:18,378
Oh dear lord.

125
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:21,672
I think they think I'm cooler than I am.

126
00:06:21,756 --> 00:06:23,716
Since I got here, it's been amazing.

127
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:24,800
We smoked...

128
00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:26,510
a ham,

129
00:06:27,011 --> 00:06:28,388
and we tapped a...

130
00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:30,597
a ham.

131
00:06:32,016 --> 00:06:35,103
I'm worried they're expecting
more ham, you know?

132
00:06:36,521 --> 00:06:39,232
That's an awful lot of ham.

133
00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:42,610
Honey, I think you're putting
too much pressure on yourself.

134
00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:45,405
Why don't you invite them back
for a movie night?

135
00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:47,031
Is nobody listening to me?

136
00:06:48,866 --> 00:06:51,619
I don't know, Grandma.
A movie night? It's not boring?

137
00:06:51,702 --> 00:06:53,871
No, it'll be fun.

138
00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:55,373
We'll do it tomorrow.

139
00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:58,126
We'll rent a movie and make a ham.

140
00:06:58,209 --> 00:07:00,420
Since you kids are so obsessed with it.

141
00:07:01,587 --> 00:07:04,006
[rock music playing]

142
00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:05,550
- [knocking]
- I'll get it!

143
00:07:08,886 --> 00:07:11,264
Hey, which one of you yelled at my kids?

144
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:13,141
Red, it's for you.

145
00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:16,561
I don't know which ones are yours,
but they deserved it.

146
00:07:16,644 --> 00:07:19,480
Oh, that's Gwen and Nate, and thanks.

147
00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,065
I'm sick of yelling at them.

148
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:24,110
Yesterday, I caught Nate
on the roof trying on rollerblades.

149
00:07:24,193 --> 00:07:26,112
I was pregnant with him for ten months.

150
00:07:26,195 --> 00:07:28,948
The doctor said it was okay,
but I don't think it was.

151
00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:33,411
You moved in next door, right?

152
00:07:33,494 --> 00:07:38,207
I waved at you last week, but you were
washing your hair with the hose, so...

153
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:41,085
[laughs] I am Kitty and this is Red.

154
00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:43,880
Oh, I'm Sherri.
And, yeah, my shower head's broke.

155
00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:47,425
Turns out it can't support
the weight of two fully grown adults.

156
00:07:48,009 --> 00:07:51,596
Oh, well, look at you and your hubby
keeping things saucy.

157
00:07:51,679 --> 00:07:53,848
Oh. Actually, the hubby's
out of the picture,

158
00:07:53,931 --> 00:07:56,934
but the guy I've been seeing
is talking about us moving in together.

159
00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:58,658
How long have you been seeing each other?

160
00:07:58,686 --> 00:07:59,812
Two weeks.

161
00:07:59,896 --> 00:08:02,231
Two weeks and he already wants to move in?

162
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,943
Yeah, he's kinda clingy.
I should probably break things off.

163
00:08:06,027 --> 00:08:10,114
It's too bad. He's got it all.
Good looks, good job, blue Miata.

164
00:08:10,990 --> 00:08:13,868
Hey. You guys mind
if I pop this in your microwave?

165
00:08:13,951 --> 00:08:15,786
It'll take a hour if I use mine.

166
00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:18,331
Sure, sure. It's in the kitchen.

167
00:08:18,414 --> 00:08:21,167
Oh. Kitty, you're a sweetheart. And Red...

168
00:08:22,043 --> 00:08:23,043
Yeah.

169
00:08:25,296 --> 00:08:28,466
She has all sorts of things in that bag.

170
00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:31,886
Yeah, she's like a trashy Mary Poppins.

171
00:08:31,969 --> 00:08:36,390
[rock music playing]

172
00:08:36,474 --> 00:08:38,392
Maybe you're overthinking this.

173
00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:41,979
Could we fast-forward
to the part where you pick a movie?

174
00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:43,898
Oh! [laughing]

175
00:08:43,981 --> 00:08:46,567
"Fast-forward"! That is clever!

176
00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,694
I should send that in to Leno.

177
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:52,073
It's really important I don't pick
something everyone will think is dorky.

178
00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:55,034
Well, you couldn't pick something dorky
if you tried.

179
00:08:55,117 --> 00:08:58,955
- Come on. What's your favorite movie?
- Um, I guess <i>Free Willy</i>.

180
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,707
Whoa. Dork city!

181
00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:03,042
[laughs]

182
00:09:03,626 --> 00:09:04,626
[grunts]

183
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:06,546
I'm gonna go ask for some help.

184
00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:11,717
- Stick 'em up!
- Aah! Take my money! Take everything!

185
00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:15,304
My boss never locks her car!
Her license plate says MOVIESLUT!

186
00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:18,474
I know. I don't want to say it.
I'm just letting you know.

187
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,892
Please...

188
00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:22,478
Jay, it's just me. I was joking.

189
00:09:23,437 --> 00:09:24,814
Oh. Yeah.

190
00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:25,815
[clears throat]

191
00:09:25,898 --> 00:09:27,275
Me too. [sniffles]

192
00:09:27,358 --> 00:09:28,358
Good one.

193
00:09:29,277 --> 00:09:31,362
- I, um, didn't know you worked here.
- Oh.

194
00:09:31,445 --> 00:09:34,282
Well, I didn't want to brag about
being in show business.

195
00:09:35,199 --> 00:09:36,701
Right. Um...

196
00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:39,745
So I'm trying to find
a cool movie for movie night,

197
00:09:39,829 --> 00:09:42,331
and, not that I'm super worried about it
or anything,

198
00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:44,250
but what's that one movie?

199
00:09:44,333 --> 00:09:48,462
You know, with all the guys
and the place and... the guys?

200
00:09:49,046 --> 00:09:50,923
- Uh, <i>Clerks</i>?
<i>- Clerks</i>, yes!

201
00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:53,843
Get out! I love<i> Clerks.</i>
Kevin Smith, right?

202
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:57,638
Oh yeah! He was so sexy in that.

203
00:09:58,514 --> 00:10:00,725
Okay. Cool.

204
00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:04,020
Uh, well, let's see if I have it.
Let's see...

205
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:07,481
Ah, crud, it's out.

206
00:10:08,065 --> 00:10:10,526
Some guy has had it for six weeks.

207
00:10:11,152 --> 00:10:13,279
Yo, Jay. I need your help in the bathroom.

208
00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:15,615
It's a<i> Joe Versus the Volcano </i>situation.

209
00:10:17,158 --> 00:10:18,159
Later, girl.

210
00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:25,666
- Come on, Grandma. We gotta go.
- Oh, just a sec.

211
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,794
Pastor Dave, it's Kitty!

212
00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:31,922
I haven't seen you since the potluck.

213
00:10:33,007 --> 00:10:34,884
That was very unholy.

214
00:10:35,384 --> 00:10:38,220
[rock music playing]

215
00:10:39,096 --> 00:10:41,057
Hey, Mr. Forman.

216
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,476
Look what I found
in your garden of tiny vegetables.

217
00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:44,935
Baby cucumber.

218
00:10:45,019 --> 00:10:46,646
Give me that.

219
00:10:47,563 --> 00:10:49,523
That is normal-sized.

220
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:53,569
Don't be embarrassed.
Maybe it's a grower, not a shower.

221
00:10:55,696 --> 00:10:59,659
Anyway, I came by
to talk to you about your flannels.

222
00:11:00,242 --> 00:11:01,243
Can I have one?

223
00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:02,327
Why?

224
00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:07,500
My girlfriend said I looked good in it,
and she's kinda out of my league.

225
00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:10,127
But I love her so much,
and I want to keep her happy.

226
00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:11,087
That's sweet.

227
00:11:11,170 --> 00:11:14,882
I had a similar thing
with my first girlfriend.

228
00:11:16,300 --> 00:11:17,927
You know what her name was?

229
00:11:18,010 --> 00:11:19,387
Get out.

230
00:11:20,846 --> 00:11:21,847
Yes, sir.

231
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:23,891
Hey, neighbor.

232
00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:29,188
Kitty said until I get
my shower situation fixed,

233
00:11:29,271 --> 00:11:31,357
I can rinse my nooks and crannies
over here.

234
00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:33,901
Well, this is my house too.

235
00:11:33,984 --> 00:11:37,697
So you can just take your crannies home.

236
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,740
I'm gonna need to borrow a razor too.

237
00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:41,951
Blue Miata is taking me
to dinner at Houlihan's.

238
00:11:42,034 --> 00:11:44,829
When a guy springs for Houlihan's,
you gotta whack the weeds.

239
00:11:44,912 --> 00:11:46,414
[rock music playing]

240
00:11:47,206 --> 00:11:48,916
Are you sure it's okay

241
00:11:48,999 --> 00:11:51,836
that we're just showing up
at somebody's house to get a movie?

242
00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:53,713
I'm out of options here, Grandma.

243
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:57,466
What if we get murdered?
Who's gonna turn off the Crock-Pot?

244
00:12:00,136 --> 00:12:01,512
- [doorbell chimes]
- [Kitty sighs]

245
00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:05,391
Aw, man!

246
00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:10,521
Halloween snuck up on me again.

247
00:12:10,604 --> 00:12:13,065
Hey, listen. I don't have any candy, man,

248
00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,359
but I do have some matches

249
00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:18,446
and a parking ticket from 1975.

250
00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,158
Leo. Hi.

251
00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:23,868
Don't you recognize me?

252
00:12:23,951 --> 00:12:25,244
I do.

253
00:12:25,911 --> 00:12:30,583
Yeah. You're dressed like Kitty,
the lady with the house and the hair.

254
00:12:31,208 --> 00:12:32,710
Killer costume, man.

255
00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:35,755
Did you rent the movie <i>Clerks</i>
and not return it?

256
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:37,882
Are you guys cops?

257
00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:39,884
Leo, focus.

258
00:12:39,967 --> 00:12:42,428
Hey, if you cops are looking
for Leo Focus,

259
00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:44,346
you got the wrong guy, man.

260
00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:47,308
Please, Leo. This is important.

261
00:12:47,391 --> 00:12:50,311
You know what I've been watching
a ton of lately?

262
00:12:51,353 --> 00:12:52,396
<i>The Real World</i>.

263
00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:54,356
Because think about it.

264
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,902
If that's the real world, what's all this?

265
00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:02,156
This might be a dead end.

266
00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:07,244
Wait. Leo, it <i>is</i> Halloween.

267
00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:09,747
And you know what I really want
instead of candy?

268
00:13:09,830 --> 00:13:11,749
The movie <i>Clerks</i>.

269
00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:14,710
Crazy! I got a copy.

270
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:17,046
I'll get it for you.

271
00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:20,841
- Wait. So how do you know this guy?
- Oh, he just... He's...

272
00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:23,010
It's the usual.
You know, he's an older man

273
00:13:23,093 --> 00:13:27,598
who used to hang out with your dad
and his friends when they were teenagers.

274
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:31,811
Nah.

275
00:13:32,853 --> 00:13:34,814
They would have said something.

276
00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:37,775
Okay, are you the cops
looking for a movie?

277
00:13:38,359 --> 00:13:39,359
Yes, we are.

278
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:43,781
- Happy Halloween, man.
- Thank you. Thank you.

279
00:13:48,244 --> 00:13:49,119
There you are.

280
00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:52,248
Leia and I had such a fun afternoon.

281
00:13:52,331 --> 00:13:55,376
Kitty, this house is under attack.

282
00:13:55,459 --> 00:13:58,045
There are teenagers everywhere

283
00:13:58,128 --> 00:14:02,591
and a half-naked lady
swinging her bits around my house.

284
00:14:03,175 --> 00:14:05,636
Oh good. Sherri's using the shower.

285
00:14:05,719 --> 00:14:10,808
Why did you open our house to chaos again?

286
00:14:10,891 --> 00:14:15,020
We had it made.
All the dumbasses were gone!

287
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,065
Well, I miss them.

288
00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:21,527
It's been too quiet
around here for me, Red.

289
00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:23,779
Well, then, get a parrot!

290
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:27,950
And if that's not enough squawkin'
for you, invite your sister.

291
00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:30,619
I like having Leia visit for the summer.

292
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,162
The house is alive again.

293
00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:36,876
The other day, I walked into the bathroom,
someone had tinkled, left the seat up,

294
00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:39,295
and it made me so happy.

295
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,381
I could do that for you!

296
00:14:42,965 --> 00:14:45,175
Complain all you want,
but these past few weeks

297
00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:47,553
I have seen glimpses of the old Red.

298
00:14:47,636 --> 00:14:50,472
The fire, the passion. I miss him.

299
00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:52,224
He's retired.

300
00:14:52,808 --> 00:14:55,102
But he's still alive.

301
00:14:55,185 --> 00:14:56,812
You can't spend all day

302
00:14:56,896 --> 00:15:00,482
scraping around in your garden,
playing with your tomatoes.

303
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:04,695
- You love my tomatoes!
- Your tomatoes are small!

304
00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:10,784
Your head is sweaty.

305
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:15,039
- Your chest is heaving.
- [Kitty moans]

306
00:15:16,081 --> 00:15:18,959
["Tell Me Something Good"
by Chaka Khan playing]

307
00:15:19,043 --> 00:15:20,961
<i>♪ Tell me something good... ♪</i>

308
00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:24,465
Well, so much for a quiet retirement.

309
00:15:24,548 --> 00:15:27,927
There's no more lint in my dryer filter.

310
00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:29,803
[both laughing]

311
00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:31,347
Is it safe to come out?

312
00:15:32,389 --> 00:15:33,390
Sherri.

313
00:15:35,142 --> 00:15:38,562
I was taking a shower. When I got done,
you guys were dirty doggin' it,

314
00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:40,940
so I just hunkered down
and rode out the storm.

315
00:15:41,523 --> 00:15:43,692
I told you I heard the toilet flush.

316
00:15:45,694 --> 00:15:49,573
Sorry, I was only up here 'cause I was
getting ready for this mistake of a date.

317
00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:50,783
A date?

318
00:15:50,866 --> 00:15:53,160
Blue Miata, Houliha... Keep up.

319
00:15:54,119 --> 00:15:57,373
But it did give me time to think,
which I never get to do.

320
00:15:57,456 --> 00:15:59,708
I mean, what do I want from my life?

321
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:00,960
Because I'm pretty sure

322
00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:05,047
hiding in my neighbor's bathroom
listening to old people bang isn't it.

323
00:16:05,547 --> 00:16:07,883
Sounded like somebody was eating
corn on the cob.

324
00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:10,970
What's wrong with me?

325
00:16:11,553 --> 00:16:14,848
Why do I keep making the same mistake
over and over?

326
00:16:14,932 --> 00:16:19,395
Oh, honey. Go easy on yourself.

327
00:16:19,937 --> 00:16:22,064
You have a steady job.

328
00:16:22,147 --> 00:16:25,901
You are raising two wonderful kids
all on your own.

329
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:27,736
You are amazing.

330
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:31,115
- Kitty, why are you lying to her?
- Red...

331
00:16:31,699 --> 00:16:32,825
But he's not wrong.

332
00:16:32,908 --> 00:16:36,370
Okay, maybe it's time
to take a break from the fellas

333
00:16:36,453 --> 00:16:38,789
and see what it's like on your own.

334
00:16:38,872 --> 00:16:40,374
Being alone sounds scary.

335
00:16:40,457 --> 00:16:42,710
Well, you're not alone. You've got us.

336
00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:43,793
Us?

337
00:16:44,211 --> 00:16:46,130
You'd think you'd be
in a better mood right now.

338
00:16:47,214 --> 00:16:49,633
[rock music playing]

339
00:16:50,884 --> 00:16:52,720
Welcome to movie night.

340
00:16:52,803 --> 00:16:54,972
It's gonna be pretty major,
so to kick things off right

341
00:16:55,055 --> 00:16:57,933
I got everyone
their own box of Raisin Bran.

342
00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:00,811
Raisin Bran! Raisin Bran!
Raisin Bran! [chuckles]

343
00:17:00,894 --> 00:17:02,521
Everybody loves it. Remember?

344
00:17:02,604 --> 00:17:05,190
No? Did that not happen?

345
00:17:06,233 --> 00:17:08,152
Oh, you know who loves Raisin Bran?

346
00:17:08,235 --> 00:17:09,653
My cousin who did Brett Favre's...

347
00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:11,155
Do not.

348
00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:14,825
- So what are we watching?
- Uh, my favorite movie.

349
00:17:14,908 --> 00:17:16,744
<i>Clerks, </i>starring Kevin Smith.

350
00:17:16,827 --> 00:17:18,495
[chuckles] I'll take a slice of that.

351
00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:21,749
[both] Okay...

352
00:17:24,418 --> 00:17:27,296
<i>Hey, MTV. I'm Leo, man.</i>

353
00:17:27,963 --> 00:17:29,923
<i>I'm 74 years young,</i>

354
00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:33,135
<i>and I'd be perfect
for</i> The Real World, <i>man.</i>

355
00:17:33,218 --> 00:17:34,219
What's this?

356
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:37,056
I don't know.
It was supposed to be <i>Clerks.</i>

357
00:17:37,139 --> 00:17:38,640
Fun facts about me.

358
00:17:40,309 --> 00:17:43,103
I've fallen off of
three roller coasters, man.

359
00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:47,107
Well, four, if you count the fourth one.

360
00:17:47,191 --> 00:17:48,567
[TV clicks off]

361
00:17:49,151 --> 00:17:51,111
Uh... forget movies.

362
00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:53,238
Does anyone have
any funny stories to share?

363
00:17:53,822 --> 00:17:54,822
[choking]

364
00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:55,865
Oh good, Nate.

365
00:17:56,617 --> 00:17:59,536
No. He's choking on the Raisin Bran.
It's too dry.

366
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:01,163
Give him something to drink.

367
00:18:03,290 --> 00:18:04,290
Forget the straw!

368
00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:07,461
Okay. Drink, baby, drink.

369
00:18:07,544 --> 00:18:09,588
[slurping]

370
00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:11,799
I'm good. It went down.

371
00:18:12,299 --> 00:18:14,426
[choking]

372
00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:16,345
No, you gotta clear it out like this.
Like...

373
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:17,763
- [coughs]
- [coughs]

374
00:18:17,846 --> 00:18:21,558
Leia, you should be an event planner.
This is so fun.

375
00:18:22,184 --> 00:18:23,310
Gah! I'm sorry!

376
00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:26,522
I really wanted this
to be a perfect night.

377
00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,440
[scoffs] Forget it.

378
00:18:30,317 --> 00:18:31,318
Leia...

379
00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:34,696
Hey, stop eating that.

380
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:35,780
I'm hungry!

381
00:18:37,449 --> 00:18:39,910
Yo, drama queen. What was up with that?

382
00:18:40,494 --> 00:18:41,537
I'm a fraud.

383
00:18:41,620 --> 00:18:43,247
I've never even seen <i>Clerks</i>.

384
00:18:43,330 --> 00:18:45,749
My favorite movie is... <i>Free Willy</i>.

385
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:48,710
It's about a boy.

386
00:18:50,045 --> 00:18:51,046
And his whale.

387
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:52,965
So?

388
00:18:53,715 --> 00:18:55,467
So he tries to get Willy
back in the ocean.

389
00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:58,554
No. I mean,
why did you melt down in there?

390
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:01,098
It's just...

391
00:19:01,932 --> 00:19:04,226
I feel like an imposter in this group.

392
00:19:04,726 --> 00:19:07,563
You guys are all so close and so cool,

393
00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:10,274
and I'm just me.

394
00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:13,152
If you're ever doubting yourself,
just remember,

395
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:15,988
you have a <i>killer</i> basement.

396
00:19:17,573 --> 00:19:19,533
I thought you were gonna say
something way nicer.

397
00:19:20,742 --> 00:19:22,661
You know how boring it is around here?

398
00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:27,374
Last week, we threw a stick in the creek
and tried to hit it with other sticks.

399
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,626
Nate called it Stick Stick.

400
00:19:33,672 --> 00:19:35,591
It's not just about your basement, dummy.

401
00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:38,302
If you're stressing about me, we're good.

402
00:19:39,469 --> 00:19:42,264
And if you're worried about
fitting in with everyone else,

403
00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:44,433
you found the people who don't fit in.

404
00:19:45,392 --> 00:19:46,476
And I am their queen.

405
00:19:48,395 --> 00:19:49,688
Never had a friend like you.

406
00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:51,940
I know.

407
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:54,401
Guys!

408
00:19:54,484 --> 00:19:56,987
We just found another bag inside this bag.

409
00:19:57,946 --> 00:19:58,989
<i>Bag </i>bag!

410
00:20:00,449 --> 00:20:01,909
I just came up with that.

411
00:20:02,409 --> 00:20:05,579
[rock music playing]

412
00:20:06,663 --> 00:20:09,958
The stuff in that <i>bag </i>bag was <i>good </i>good.

413
00:20:11,168 --> 00:20:14,004
Not as good as <i>Free Willy.</i> I love it.

414
00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:17,007
Check yourself.
This is just<i> E.T.</i> with a whale.

415
00:20:18,842 --> 00:20:21,345
I know it's not <i>Clerks</i>,
but it's kinda cute, right?

416
00:20:21,428 --> 00:20:24,097
It's like... I'm the boy

417
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,850
and Willy's the rubber band.

418
00:20:27,684 --> 00:20:28,685
I get it now.

419
00:20:29,978 --> 00:20:31,813
Leia, is Willy gonna make it?

420
00:20:31,897 --> 00:20:33,690
Did E.T. make it?

421
00:20:35,442 --> 00:20:36,693
- Come on, Willy.
- Come on.

422
00:20:36,777 --> 00:20:37,611
You can do it.

423
00:20:37,694 --> 00:20:39,321
- You got this. Come on.
- Yes, Willy.

424
00:20:39,404 --> 00:20:40,405
[all] Yeah!

425
00:20:40,489 --> 00:20:41,657
He made it!

426
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,575
- [movie score swells]
- [laughing]

427
00:20:50,499 --> 00:20:51,875
This never happened.

428
00:20:53,961 --> 00:20:55,462
Hey, Mr. Forman.

429
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:57,381
I found this in my van.

430
00:20:57,881 --> 00:20:59,591
Looks like I have a secret admirer.

431
00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:01,593
[whispers] It's you, isn't it?

432
00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:05,889
It's just a shirt. Don't make it weird.

433
00:21:05,973 --> 00:21:07,057
I'm not.

434
00:21:08,892 --> 00:21:11,103
- Can I call you Uncle Red?
- Get out.

435
00:21:14,481 --> 00:21:15,482
Bye, Uncle Red.

436
00:21:19,569 --> 00:21:20,569
Kitty.

437
00:21:22,948 --> 00:21:25,158
<i>That's </i>what you're wearing
to break up with a guy?

438
00:21:26,952 --> 00:21:29,788
I can't imagine
what you would wear to a pool party.

439
00:21:32,457 --> 00:21:34,584
What? This is my funeral outfit.

440
00:21:35,377 --> 00:21:37,879
It's what I wear
to say goodbye to someone forever.

441
00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:39,339
[car horn honking]

442
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:42,426
That's him. Oh God, I'm just so nervous.

443
00:21:42,509 --> 00:21:43,969
I've eaten a ton of my hair.

444
00:21:45,387 --> 00:21:46,888
This was so much higher.

445
00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:47,973
Well, stop that.

446
00:21:48,557 --> 00:21:51,018
- You are strong.
- Yeah.

447
00:21:51,101 --> 00:21:52,644
- You're independent.
- Yeah.

448
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:53,729
You're still young...

449
00:21:53,812 --> 00:21:54,812
- Yeah.
- ...ish.

450
00:21:56,189 --> 00:21:59,318
- He is just some guy with a fancy horn.
- Right.

451
00:21:59,401 --> 00:22:00,944
Now, go.

452
00:22:01,486 --> 00:22:03,155
Dump that chump!

453
00:22:03,238 --> 00:22:05,532
That's what they say on <i>Ricki Lake.</i>

454
00:22:05,615 --> 00:22:06,615
[laughs]

455
00:22:23,925 --> 00:22:26,762
I thought it would be fun
for you to see me look this sexy.

456
00:22:27,346 --> 00:22:28,680
[rock music playing]

457
00:22:33,185 --> 00:22:37,606
[rock music playing]