1
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:18,685
Gaby always gives me shit about my book.
2
00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:23,147
This is the clearest,
most concise volume ever written
3
00:00:23,148 --> 00:00:25,776
about modern cognitive behavioral therapy.
4
00:00:27,069 --> 00:00:28,987
That's nice. Who wrote that?
5
00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:31,365
Nobody, I just thought I'd tell you.
6
00:00:34,826 --> 00:00:35,827
How you doing?
7
00:00:36,828 --> 00:00:37,829
Fuck.
8
00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:44,293
Here we are. You know, I'm fine. I'm good.
9
00:00:44,294 --> 00:00:45,711
You're a good therapist.
10
00:00:45,712 --> 00:00:47,714
You already know what I'm gonna say.
11
00:00:48,257 --> 00:00:49,632
Don't piss your pants.
12
00:00:49,633 --> 00:00:52,718
I said good. Not great.
13
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,389
I know. But I feel like you meant great.
14
00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:56,932
Maybe.
15
00:00:57,683 --> 00:01:02,228
Look, kid, you're never gonna forgive
yourself for shitting the bed as a father
16
00:01:02,229 --> 00:01:05,524
until you bare your soul to Alice.
17
00:01:06,108 --> 00:01:07,693
She might still blame you.
18
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:12,072
But it's the act of revelation
that's healing.
19
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,366
That's how confession works.
20
00:01:14,867 --> 00:01:17,744
Doesn't matter what
Father MacDiddle says back.
21
00:01:18,871 --> 00:01:23,875
It's about you admitting what you did
and why it was wrong.
22
00:01:23,876 --> 00:01:28,505
You know, I'm not gonna make Alice think
that I'm suffering and it's her fault.
23
00:01:30,674 --> 00:01:31,675
It's not gonna happen.
24
00:01:32,676 --> 00:01:33,677
Okay.
25
00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,387
What the fuck, man? That's it?
26
00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:38,056
For now.
27
00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:42,351
Hey, you were supposed to bring me
some candy and a new hat.
28
00:01:42,352 --> 00:01:44,146
Yes, they're on your desk, Paul.
29
00:01:45,522 --> 00:01:50,444
Hey. I know you think this is funny,
but I love this.
30
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:54,948
Okay.
31
00:01:57,326 --> 00:01:58,160
Damn it.
32
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,329
Nice, babe.
33
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:02,956
Yeah, focus on your game. Come on.
34
00:02:03,999 --> 00:02:05,083
Here comes a big one.
35
00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:07,711
- Yes, baby.
- I got it.
36
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:11,380
- You okay, babe?
- Nice game.
37
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:12,381
But it's only 3-0.
38
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,093
But I can already tell
you're not good enough to make it fun.
39
00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:18,304
Besides, our boys are here
for Thanksgiving and we got shit to do.
40
00:02:18,305 --> 00:02:21,016
Gotta buy lighter fluid
to burn those sheets after they leave?
41
00:02:21,767 --> 00:02:24,018
They never age out
of pleasuring themselves, do they?
42
00:02:24,019 --> 00:02:24,936
No.
43
00:02:24,937 --> 00:02:27,855
- You guys getting ready for the baby?
- No rush. We got four months.
44
00:02:27,856 --> 00:02:30,650
- You haven't started prepping yet?
- Wow.
45
00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:31,943
Are you two fucking high?
46
00:02:31,944 --> 00:02:33,778
- Honestly, a little.
- Did you want a gummy?
47
00:02:33,779 --> 00:02:35,112
You both work.
48
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:37,990
If you don't get
on the nanny search pronto,
49
00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:40,451
your parents are gonna have to come help.
50
00:02:40,452 --> 00:02:42,119
When we had our first,
51
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:46,707
my mom came, threw away Liz's placenta
and they haven't spoken since.
52
00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:48,543
- That's not the only reason.
- No parents.
53
00:02:48,544 --> 00:02:50,211
You keep the placenta?
54
00:02:50,212 --> 00:02:51,629
- Oh, yeah.
- Don't worry about it.
55
00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:53,172
Well, now it's all I can think about.
56
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:56,050
Okay, calm down.
I'll help with the nanny search.
57
00:02:56,051 --> 00:02:58,719
You're the best. Let us know who you find.
58
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,055
You're gonna be there, dipshit.
59
00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:04,392
Okay. One more game just to de-stress.
Let's switch partners.
60
00:03:04,393 --> 00:03:05,935
Low-maintenance against high-maintenance.
61
00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:06,853
Let's do it, Dizzle.
62
00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:08,939
Look at that. He knows who's who.
63
00:03:10,148 --> 00:03:12,525
That dizzle right in the belly. Let's go.
64
00:03:12,526 --> 00:03:14,735
Yeah, Mom. I know you're still angry.
65
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:15,820
You have every right to be.
66
00:03:15,821 --> 00:03:17,154
I have every right to be.
67
00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:19,156
- Good, so we agree.
- Yeah, we do.
68
00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:20,867
So can you please come to Thanksgiving?
69
00:03:20,868 --> 00:03:22,702
You can go back to being mad at me again
on Black Friday,
70
00:03:22,703 --> 00:03:25,664
even though I think that's the day that
Black families should come together.
71
00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:30,042
Why are you silent?
Is fucking Nikki with you?
72
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:32,086
- Your mouth.
- She's so rude.
73
00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:35,257
Listen, bitch, you keep your nose out
of our family business,
74
00:03:35,841 --> 00:03:38,718
or else I will come for you
like I'm fucking Tony Soprano.
75
00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:40,720
I dare you to try me. I dare you.
76
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:41,679
I will try.
77
00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:45,141
Also can I, like, get your Venmo for when
you stayed the extra night on Saturday?
78
00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:46,851
- All good. I got you.
- Thanks.
79
00:03:46,852 --> 00:03:48,686
Okay, so, Mom, I can come pick you up.
80
00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:50,689
I'm sorry, Gaby. I'm sorry. It...
81
00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:55,527
It's just too hard right now, baby.
It's too hard.
82
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:01,866
She's not coming.
83
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:04,494
What? Did you tell her
that Derrick's coming?
84
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:07,079
Doesn't your mom want to meet him?
85
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,415
All right, Derrick's not coming either.
I screwed that up too.
86
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,667
Did you not see
my "shut-the-fuck-up" look?
87
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:15,004
I did, Liz. But in my defense,
you always have that look.
88
00:04:15,005 --> 00:04:16,756
I'm not sure you have another look.
89
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:17,882
There's one.
90
00:04:18,466 --> 00:04:19,467
Come here.
91
00:04:19,468 --> 00:04:21,927
Do you wanna bury your head
in my secret big 'uns?
92
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:24,305
Liz, come on, girl.
At best, those are secret mids.
93
00:04:24,306 --> 00:04:25,348
You should see 'em though.
94
00:04:25,349 --> 00:04:27,892
I've seen 'em like a gajillion times,
you know that.
95
00:04:27,893 --> 00:04:29,769
I know, but I was lying down.
96
00:04:29,770 --> 00:04:31,437
- Oh, come on.
- I know, baby.
97
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:33,732
- I love feeling our boobs touch.
- I do too.
98
00:04:34,316 --> 00:04:36,484
Look, I don't know what's going on
so I'm just gonna start talking.
99
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:38,277
Here's your Thanksgiving menu.
100
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:41,822
I'm making turkey, ham,
mac 'n' cheese, greens and dressing.
101
00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:44,534
Holy shit. That's nice of you
to cook for Gabs.
102
00:04:44,535 --> 00:04:46,577
Not so nice.
This dude's charging me a fortune.
103
00:04:46,578 --> 00:04:48,538
- That's how it works.
- But he is gonna teach me what to say
104
00:04:48,539 --> 00:04:49,664
so I can pretend that I made it.
105
00:04:49,665 --> 00:04:52,250
Like, "I deboned the ham."
106
00:04:52,251 --> 00:04:54,585
- Nope.
- Pigs have bones, Sean.
107
00:04:54,586 --> 00:04:57,046
All right, I gotta head out.
You wanna touch boobs too?
108
00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:58,507
- Yeah, why not?
- Cool.
109
00:04:59,508 --> 00:05:00,508
Copycats.
110
00:05:00,509 --> 00:05:02,635
Kinda hoping that since Alice
basically lives with you now,
111
00:05:02,636 --> 00:05:05,513
I might be able to say hey,
but guess she's not here.
112
00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:06,598
I'm here.
113
00:05:09,351 --> 00:05:11,894
Okay, I guess I didn't know
if you knew that I was here.
114
00:05:11,895 --> 00:05:14,146
- I did.
- Cool.
115
00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,773
- That's rough.
- Hate to see it.
116
00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:16,900
Goodbye.
117
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:23,490
What up, pimp?
118
00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,617
Hey. I need you to do me a favor.
119
00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:30,454
Just let Alice know that whenever
she's ready to talk, I'm around, okay?
120
00:05:30,455 --> 00:05:32,540
Make it sound casual. Throw in some lingo.
121
00:05:32,541 --> 00:05:34,000
You know, maybe, like, a "fam."
122
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,293
Fam is not cool.
123
00:05:35,294 --> 00:05:37,546
- Go ahead and make it your own.
- Okay.
124
00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:40,257
You really give a shit, don't you?
125
00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:43,009
Yeah, that's sort of my thing.
126
00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:45,220
My parents aren't even here
for Thanksgiving.
127
00:05:45,721 --> 00:05:47,597
My mom's spending the week at Morongo.
128
00:05:47,598 --> 00:05:50,892
My dad's also at Morongo but legally,
he's not allowed within 100 feet of her
129
00:05:50,893 --> 00:05:52,685
so when she's gambling, he's in the pool.
130
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:54,897
- And when she's in the pool... you get it.
- Yeah.
131
00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:57,191
Nice catching up, Summer.
132
00:05:57,900 --> 00:05:58,901
See you, pimp.
133
00:05:59,943 --> 00:06:02,905
Yeah, it's not good news about the meds,
134
00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:05,615
but I'm processing it.
135
00:06:05,616 --> 00:06:07,950
And by processing, you mean
refusing to talk about it
136
00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:09,911
or say how it makes you feel?
137
00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:10,828
Bingo.
138
00:06:10,829 --> 00:06:13,581
Hey, tell Meg I saw her new hair
on Instagram.
139
00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:14,666
Looks amazing.
140
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:18,128
Julie wants you to know
that she's stalking you.
141
00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:19,921
That's okay. She's hot.
142
00:06:19,922 --> 00:06:23,509
You know what, I'm glad she's there,
because the reason I'm calling, Dad...
143
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:27,638
We were so excited for you guys
to fly out here for Thanksgiving but...
144
00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:32,099
Mason's lacrosse team... They won today.
145
00:06:32,100 --> 00:06:36,647
Which is insane because they're
fucking terrible and now I have to...
146
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,525
We have to spend the weekend
at a tournament in Maine.
147
00:06:40,526 --> 00:06:42,527
What if instead of
coming for Thanksgiving,
148
00:06:42,528 --> 00:06:44,529
we just... we come and see you
in a few weeks?
149
00:06:44,530 --> 00:06:46,113
Dad, I feel so bad, I--
150
00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:48,115
Don't feel bad. It's all right.
151
00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:49,326
I'm disappointed.
152
00:06:51,495 --> 00:06:52,745
But I'll be okay.
153
00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:54,581
- I love you.
- Love you too, baby.
154
00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:57,667
We don't have to go to Connecticut.
155
00:06:57,668 --> 00:07:01,212
We can stay here and do sweet fuck all.
Best Thanksgiving ever.
156
00:07:01,213 --> 00:07:02,881
You're still on the phone, Dad.
157
00:07:06,134 --> 00:07:06,968
My bad.
158
00:07:06,969 --> 00:07:08,679
Yeah. Yeah, your bad.
159
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:41,002
{\an8}Last week, I feel like we got into it,
160
00:07:41,003 --> 00:07:43,254
{\an8}but this week,
we're really gonna get into it, okay?
161
00:07:43,255 --> 00:07:45,840
{\an8}- 'Cause I am jacked off caffeine.
- Yeah, okay.
162
00:07:45,841 --> 00:07:47,466
{\an8}Hey, go ahead. One second.
163
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:49,093
{\an8}Hey, Paul. Heard you were staying in town.
164
00:07:49,094 --> 00:07:51,137
{\an8}Let me know if you want
to come for Thanksgiving.
165
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:54,807
{\an8}No. And if you tell Julie
that you invited us, I'll kill you.
166
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:56,017
{\an8}Thanks for the quick response.
167
00:07:56,018 --> 00:07:57,018
{\an8}- Hey.
- Hey.
168
00:07:57,019 --> 00:07:59,437
{\an8}Don't forget,
we're meeting for a coffee later.
169
00:07:59,438 --> 00:08:01,814
{\an8}Oh, come on, man. Not another "chat."
170
00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:03,608
{\an8}What, are you gonna
hang out with your daughter?
171
00:08:03,609 --> 00:08:05,861
{\an8}- You've got nothing better to do.
- Oh, shit.
172
00:08:06,445 --> 00:08:07,779
{\an8}Yeah.
173
00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:14,995
{\an8}Hey. Is everything okay?
174
00:08:22,085 --> 00:08:24,546
{\an8}Sorry, I didn't know who else to call.
175
00:08:25,422 --> 00:08:26,255
{\an8}What's going on?
176
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:30,135
{\an8}She had us open the locked case for
some Benadryl, then tried to steal Plan B.
177
00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:31,929
{\an8}Can we just have a minute?
178
00:08:35,599 --> 00:08:36,600
{\an8}What's going on?
179
00:08:37,558 --> 00:08:38,559
{\an8}You okay?
180
00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:40,354
{\an8}I'm just embarrassed.
181
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:44,775
{\an8}Connor's home and we got back together
and the condom broke.
182
00:08:45,359 --> 00:08:46,526
{\an8}I'm kind of a bouncer, so--
183
00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:48,152
{\an8}Fuck, no. No, no, no
184
00:08:48,153 --> 00:08:49,445
{\an8}I haven't called the police yet.
185
00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:51,532
{\an8}Okay. Listen.
186
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:54,283
{\an8}She's a really good kid.
187
00:08:54,284 --> 00:08:57,828
{\an8}How about I just pay for this
and we all move on with our lives?
188
00:08:57,829 --> 00:08:58,746
{\an8}Thanks, pimp.
189
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,249
{\an8}Why'd she call you pimp?
190
00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:02,625
{\an8}No, no. She calls everyone pimp.
191
00:09:02,626 --> 00:09:03,709
{\an8}She didn't call me a pimp.
192
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:04,627
{\an8}You're not a pimp.
193
00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,672
{\an8}I think she has to get to know you
before you're a pimp.
194
00:09:07,256 --> 00:09:09,382
{\an8}Get to know you to be a pimp.
Sir, is this your daughter?
195
00:09:09,383 --> 00:09:10,299
{\an8}- Yes.
- No.
196
00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:11,969
{\an8}No. She's just a friend.
197
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:14,512
{\an8}Actually, she's a friend of my daughter's.
198
00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:16,055
{\an8}Sometimes we spend time together.
199
00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:18,349
{\an8}How does everything coming out
of my mouth make this sound worse?
200
00:09:18,350 --> 00:09:20,602
{\an8}- I don't know but I hate it all.
- I hate it too.
201
00:09:21,103 --> 00:09:22,436
{\an8}You know what? I'm gonna walk away
202
00:09:22,437 --> 00:09:24,313
{\an8}and hope that you want this to be over
as much as I do.
203
00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:25,816
{\an8}- I sure do.
- Okay, great.
204
00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:31,905
{\an8}- Thanks, Jimmy.
- Yeah.
205
00:09:32,406 --> 00:09:34,073
{\an8}Did you leave enough money
for the gum I took?
206
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,158
{\an8}Goddamn it, Summer.
207
00:09:37,703 --> 00:09:39,662
Psyched to go to your parents
for Thanksgiving.
208
00:09:39,663 --> 00:09:41,747
Any special traditions
I need to know about?
209
00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:44,709
Nah, we usually just watch football,
eat too much food,
210
00:09:44,710 --> 00:09:47,920
and then around sunset, my mom cries
and says no one appreciates her.
211
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:49,088
I can't wait.
212
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:50,173
Yeah, it's fun.
213
00:09:50,174 --> 00:09:51,675
- I'll see you, Alice.
- Bye.
214
00:09:53,635 --> 00:09:55,470
Thanks for the help. Fun, right?
215
00:09:55,971 --> 00:09:58,765
So fun. Kill me now.
216
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:00,267
So why you really here?
217
00:10:01,185 --> 00:10:02,686
I can't really talk to anyone else.
218
00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:06,064
They're all worried
I'm being too hard on Dad.
219
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:11,611
I don't know. My whole life, he was this
awesome, do-anything-for-anybody guy.
220
00:10:11,612 --> 00:10:14,280
I mean, you were a stranger and
you were beating the shit out of people
221
00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:17,241
and he invited you
to move into our home, remember?
222
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:18,659
I do remember that, yes.
223
00:10:18,660 --> 00:10:23,414
I told him how important it was for me
if he showed up for Louis,
224
00:10:23,415 --> 00:10:24,916
and he still won't fucking do it.
225
00:10:24,917 --> 00:10:26,001
I hear you.
226
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:28,753
When all the shit went down with my dad,
227
00:10:28,754 --> 00:10:31,547
I had to tell him that we needed
to be more open with each other
228
00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:35,051
about how we feel, and now
he's a completely different person.
229
00:10:35,052 --> 00:10:36,970
- Damn, really?
- Hell no.
230
00:10:37,888 --> 00:10:40,765
- Don't get me wrong, he's trying.
- Yeah.
231
00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:41,974
Now I tell him I love him,
232
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:45,103
and he does this thing
where he points at me and he snaps.
233
00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:48,981
I think that means he loves me too?
234
00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:50,067
Yeah.
235
00:10:50,776 --> 00:10:52,818
I mean, look,
I've been talking about this with Paul.
236
00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:53,904
He said...
237
00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:59,700
"If you only love someone
hoping they'll change one day,
238
00:10:59,701 --> 00:11:00,953
that's not love."
239
00:11:01,537 --> 00:11:02,704
- That was good.
- Thank you.
240
00:11:04,456 --> 00:11:05,499
He's right though.
241
00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:09,378
Real love is when you accept someone,
limitations and all.
242
00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:10,921
And...
243
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,297
my dad has earned that from me.
244
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:14,383
Forever.
245
00:11:15,759 --> 00:11:18,387
Hey, fuck you for being
emotionally healthy right now.
246
00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:20,681
My bad.
247
00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:27,019
This is a great place, man.
248
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:30,064
Yeah. Yeah, Liz encouraged me to buy it.
249
00:11:30,065 --> 00:11:31,274
Partly as an investment
250
00:11:31,275 --> 00:11:35,821
and partly so I could have my own space
that's nowhere near her space.
251
00:11:37,239 --> 00:11:38,614
- She ever stop by?
- Yep.
252
00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:42,034
And when she does, she wears leather pants
and goes by "Veronica."
253
00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:43,327
Do tell.
254
00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,621
Well, I don't usually love being choked--
255
00:11:45,622 --> 00:11:48,165
No. I was wrong. Do not tell.
256
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:49,626
- You sure?
- Yeah.
257
00:11:51,086 --> 00:11:54,213
Hey. I'm sorry things didn't work out
with you and Gaby.
258
00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:56,883
Yeah, man. Like, why the fuck
did you introduce me to her?
259
00:11:56,884 --> 00:11:58,301
- Like, goddamn.
- I thought you two
260
00:11:58,302 --> 00:12:00,470
- would be a great match.
- I did too, man.
261
00:12:01,889 --> 00:12:04,765
Worst part is,
I doubt she's even thinking about me.
262
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:06,226
I can't stop thinking about him.
263
00:12:07,519 --> 00:12:08,811
Last night I had this crazy dream
264
00:12:08,812 --> 00:12:12,064
where I was sexing it up with Keanu Reeves
in this super fancy hotel.
265
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:14,942
And Derrick was the front desk clerk,
he was the bellhop,
266
00:12:14,943 --> 00:12:17,195
and he was the tip of Keanu's penis.
It was crazy.
267
00:12:17,196 --> 00:12:20,364
Well, that totally normal dream
should tell you something.
268
00:12:20,365 --> 00:12:22,325
Okay. First of all, she's right.
269
00:12:22,326 --> 00:12:24,452
And second,
I don't like you having other friends.
270
00:12:24,453 --> 00:12:25,620
Liz, we've been over this.
271
00:12:25,621 --> 00:12:27,622
It's okay for us to both
have other friends. Damn.
272
00:12:27,623 --> 00:12:29,290
I don't want other friends.
273
00:12:29,291 --> 00:12:30,958
- Well, you're gonna have to deal with it.
- No!
274
00:12:30,959 --> 00:12:34,253
Aliyah and I bonded after she dumped Nico
for being a total dumpster fire.
275
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:36,714
I still don't understand the problem.
Derrick seems great.
276
00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:38,424
Derrick's the best.
277
00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:40,468
He's just like my husband but Black.
278
00:12:40,469 --> 00:12:43,179
And honestly, that's the only thing
that would make my husband better.
279
00:12:43,180 --> 00:12:44,597
He's gonna have to keep that hair though,
280
00:12:44,598 --> 00:12:46,807
and that would make
for an interesting looking Black dude.
281
00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:48,142
I would tap that ass.
282
00:12:48,143 --> 00:12:50,229
I would tear him up.
283
00:12:51,813 --> 00:12:54,398
Shit, you guys.
My whole life I've been a caretaker.
284
00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:57,194
You know, I love knowing that I'm needed.
285
00:12:58,195 --> 00:12:59,862
That's why I've dated nothing but Nicos.
286
00:12:59,863 --> 00:13:01,739
And you wanna know
the best part about dating a Nico?
287
00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:02,657
Free heroin.
288
00:13:02,658 --> 00:13:04,825
- Stop making me like you more.
- No.
289
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,452
It just takes the pressure off.
290
00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:09,664
You know, it's, like, you stay with
a train wreck and you're a saint.
291
00:13:09,665 --> 00:13:12,291
If you leave,
it's his fault for being such a mess.
292
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:17,339
But Derrick, it's like he wants me
but he doesn't need me.
293
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:19,924
Like, there's no exit ramp.
294
00:13:19,925 --> 00:13:21,092
That's what's so scary.
295
00:13:21,093 --> 00:13:23,052
Just call him.
296
00:13:23,053 --> 00:13:25,346
You know,
bravery isn't about not being scared,
297
00:13:25,347 --> 00:13:27,557
it's about being scared
and doing it anyway.
298
00:13:27,558 --> 00:13:29,642
Oh, my God. That is so great.
299
00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,270
I'm gonna steal it and pretend it's mine.
300
00:13:32,354 --> 00:13:33,480
Shit, I gotta go.
301
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:36,357
- I love you.
- Love you.
302
00:13:36,358 --> 00:13:38,067
You're growing on me.
303
00:13:38,068 --> 00:13:39,945
Now, why was that necessary?
304
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,657
You're actually the first nanny
we've interviewed.
305
00:13:44,658 --> 00:13:46,368
I prefer "au pair."
306
00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:48,995
Love that. Very fancy.
307
00:13:48,996 --> 00:13:50,413
Sorry. Sorry I'm late.
308
00:13:50,414 --> 00:13:51,497
Oh, my God, Liz.
309
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:54,208
She's cute and a little pretentious.
Loving her.
310
00:13:54,209 --> 00:13:58,337
Well, I mean, the stamp isn't that cute
that she got from clubbing.
311
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:01,090
Didn't bother to shower to wash it off?
312
00:14:01,091 --> 00:14:02,009
Next.
313
00:14:04,011 --> 00:14:05,845
So what would be
your typical daily routine?
314
00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:07,806
I like to follow the baby's lead.
315
00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:10,892
Yeah, 'cause babies are so smart.
316
00:14:10,893 --> 00:14:12,226
They're so intuitive.
317
00:14:12,227 --> 00:14:14,645
They're so not. Bye.
318
00:14:14,646 --> 00:14:17,065
- Take a water on your way out.
- Not the sparkling.
319
00:14:19,193 --> 00:14:20,986
I can get you breast milk off Craigslist.
320
00:14:22,196 --> 00:14:25,114
Why are you even looking at me?
It's an obvious no!
321
00:14:25,115 --> 00:14:27,284
- It's an obvious no, dawg.
- Obvious no.
322
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:31,954
What's up? My name's Chris
but I go by Topher.
323
00:14:31,955 --> 00:14:33,790
- Suits you.
- Two nicknames.
324
00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:37,418
- Absolutely not.
- Come on, Liz.
325
00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:38,921
You know you can't handle it.
326
00:14:39,505 --> 00:14:40,671
She's not wrong.
327
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:41,881
So what's your story, Topher?
328
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:43,341
I'm good with a microwave.
329
00:14:43,342 --> 00:14:44,467
That's hard.
330
00:14:44,468 --> 00:14:45,469
Oh, my God.
331
00:14:46,678 --> 00:14:47,678
What?
332
00:14:47,679 --> 00:14:50,182
Well, I'm a little OCD
so I'm very punctual.
333
00:14:50,974 --> 00:14:53,852
And I feel like I should address
some of this to you.
334
00:14:54,603 --> 00:14:55,478
She's smart.
335
00:14:55,479 --> 00:14:58,731
So, I'm CPR certified.
I'm a big believer in sleep training.
336
00:14:58,732 --> 00:15:01,317
And I know that
this might sound a bit corny,
337
00:15:01,318 --> 00:15:04,821
but I really do think that it is an honor
to help build a family.
338
00:15:05,489 --> 00:15:07,740
- Please can we hire her?
- I'm so bored.
339
00:15:07,741 --> 00:15:08,700
Yes.
340
00:15:09,576 --> 00:15:11,577
Please, please work for us?
341
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:13,622
- Okay.
- Yay!
342
00:15:14,665 --> 00:15:15,790
If you need to contact us,
343
00:15:15,791 --> 00:15:18,794
I might be going to Mykonos
with my friend Topher, but Charlie won't.
344
00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:24,465
Stop staring at my brownie.
345
00:15:24,466 --> 00:15:27,552
I told you to order one for yourself
'cause I don't want to split mine,
346
00:15:27,553 --> 00:15:30,596
and you said I was an asshole
and that you didn't want a brownie.
347
00:15:30,597 --> 00:15:32,224
That was five minutes ago.
348
00:15:32,933 --> 00:15:33,933
People change.
349
00:15:33,934 --> 00:15:35,018
Damn it.
350
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:37,521
Thank you.
351
00:15:38,730 --> 00:15:39,898
What are you smiling at?
352
00:15:40,482 --> 00:15:42,942
This. You two. I did this.
353
00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:44,277
I made you two friends.
354
00:15:44,278 --> 00:15:46,988
Well, if you have that power,
can you make a woman fall for me?
355
00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:48,197
He's not a wizard.
356
00:15:48,198 --> 00:15:49,491
Hurtful.
357
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:51,284
Why am I here, Paul?
358
00:15:51,285 --> 00:15:55,289
When you've finished your drink,
I want you to go talk to Alice.
359
00:15:56,582 --> 00:15:59,333
You can pretend
that you haven't opened up to her
360
00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:03,338
because you wanna protect her,
but that's not it. You're ashamed.
361
00:16:04,006 --> 00:16:07,425
Just like I'm ashamed
of people seeing my disease.
362
00:16:07,426 --> 00:16:10,137
They see me shaking
and they feel sorry for me.
363
00:16:10,762 --> 00:16:11,888
I hate it.
364
00:16:11,889 --> 00:16:13,390
Shame is toxic.
365
00:16:13,891 --> 00:16:18,103
That's why I decided we should
face our shame together.
366
00:16:21,857 --> 00:16:24,193
That's why I didn't
take my meds this morning.
367
00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:28,071
Just let the whole damn place see me
just the way I am.
368
00:16:28,906 --> 00:16:30,532
Paul, that's incredible.
369
00:16:31,909 --> 00:16:33,410
I don't even notice any tremors.
370
00:16:34,369 --> 00:16:35,829
That's because I took my meds.
371
00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:37,496
I chickened out.
372
00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:40,334
But you... you have more courage.
373
00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:43,085
I don't know about that.
374
00:16:43,086 --> 00:16:44,420
I do.
375
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,466
Anybody that's gone through
what you've gone through
376
00:16:48,467 --> 00:16:52,387
and isn't cynical and jaded...
377
00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:56,433
That's very inspiring.
378
00:16:58,894 --> 00:16:59,728
Thanks, Paul.
379
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,652
Really? Both of you?
380
00:17:07,653 --> 00:17:08,944
It just looks so delicious.
381
00:17:08,945 --> 00:17:10,404
It's calling to me, man.
382
00:17:10,405 --> 00:17:12,240
Jiminy Christmas.
383
00:17:12,241 --> 00:17:14,450
- Here. Dig in.
- Yes!
384
00:17:14,451 --> 00:17:16,286
This is what you should be
most ashamed of.
385
00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:19,248
Well, all right.
386
00:17:20,832 --> 00:17:22,000
So, we're birds now.
387
00:17:34,221 --> 00:17:35,054
Hey, it's you.
388
00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:36,014
Hi, what up?
389
00:17:36,723 --> 00:17:38,391
We're gonna start with small talk?
390
00:17:38,392 --> 00:17:40,101
Yeah, I guess. I don't know.
391
00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:43,312
Okay. Well,
I was about to head to the market
392
00:17:43,313 --> 00:17:46,482
because my aunt forgot
the key ingredient to her sweet potatoes.
393
00:17:46,483 --> 00:17:47,608
Sweet potatoes?
394
00:17:47,609 --> 00:17:48,943
No, candy corn.
395
00:17:48,944 --> 00:17:50,278
Dude, gross. Don't they melt?
396
00:17:50,279 --> 00:17:51,779
No. She sticks 'em in after.
397
00:17:51,780 --> 00:17:53,239
- I don't love it.
- I bet you don't.
398
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:54,658
Hey, look...
399
00:17:56,201 --> 00:17:57,286
So, Derrick...
400
00:17:58,495 --> 00:18:01,540
Listen, I've been doing
some self-reflecting.
401
00:18:02,124 --> 00:18:06,920
You know, I just think I'm not used
to things being genuinely good, so I...
402
00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:09,255
I sabotaged it.
403
00:18:09,256 --> 00:18:11,507
And I gotta really work on that.
404
00:18:11,508 --> 00:18:15,137
And I think the best way to start
is by doing something that,
405
00:18:15,888 --> 00:18:17,514
honestly, I should have done weeks ago.
406
00:18:18,807 --> 00:18:19,808
So...
407
00:18:21,727 --> 00:18:23,562
Derrick, I think you're fucking amazing
408
00:18:24,062 --> 00:18:29,610
and I wanted to know if you'd reconsider
coming to Thanksgiving?
409
00:18:30,611 --> 00:18:34,697
I mean, maybe you can bring something.
Like, a pie or whatever.
410
00:18:34,698 --> 00:18:35,990
But a pie would be good.
411
00:18:35,991 --> 00:18:37,201
I forgot pie.
412
00:18:37,784 --> 00:18:38,826
I don't know, Gaby.
413
00:18:38,827 --> 00:18:41,246
I put myself out there
and you left me hanging.
414
00:18:41,914 --> 00:18:46,752
And I've tried really hard
to stop ignoring red flags.
415
00:18:47,753 --> 00:18:48,837
So how about this?
416
00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,633
You work on all that stuff
you need to work on,
417
00:18:53,884 --> 00:18:57,221
and once you get it in order,
you give me a call. Okay?
418
00:18:57,721 --> 00:19:00,599
Yeah. I will do that.
419
00:19:02,601 --> 00:19:03,644
I hope you do.
420
00:19:05,062 --> 00:19:06,146
Have a good holiday.
421
00:19:08,941 --> 00:19:09,942
Yeah, you too.
422
00:19:18,325 --> 00:19:20,785
Isn't it great having the boys home
for Thanksgiving?
423
00:19:20,786 --> 00:19:21,911
Mom!
424
00:19:21,912 --> 00:19:24,914
Matthew opened my door
and farted and then closed it.
425
00:19:24,915 --> 00:19:27,583
Matthew, don't butt bomb your brother!
426
00:19:27,584 --> 00:19:28,835
Told you, asshole!
427
00:19:28,836 --> 00:19:31,213
Yep. These are magical times.
428
00:19:31,797 --> 00:19:34,382
You know, it's stupid.
I should be happy that they're here,
429
00:19:34,383 --> 00:19:36,635
but I'm sad they're leaving Sunday.
430
00:19:37,219 --> 00:19:39,679
It's like I spent this whole year
searching for something.
431
00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:42,808
I'm just fucking right back
where I started.
432
00:19:43,475 --> 00:19:45,476
Babe, if there's anything I can do...
433
00:19:45,477 --> 00:19:47,938
Sweet husband, I'm okay.
434
00:19:49,147 --> 00:19:52,609
You know, sometimes when I do my rocks
I just feel melancholy.
435
00:19:53,193 --> 00:19:54,152
I know.
436
00:19:54,653 --> 00:19:55,946
But I'll figure it out.
437
00:19:56,738 --> 00:19:58,948
I mean,
remember what Veronica always says.
438
00:19:58,949 --> 00:20:00,324
"Breathe through your nose"?
439
00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:01,827
No, the other thing.
440
00:20:02,995 --> 00:20:04,829
"Fuck it, let's just have fun."
441
00:20:04,830 --> 00:20:06,122
Exactly right.
442
00:20:06,123 --> 00:20:07,415
And you can go.
443
00:20:07,416 --> 00:20:08,834
And you're off.
444
00:20:18,135 --> 00:20:19,635
Surprise guest.
445
00:20:19,636 --> 00:20:21,554
- Derek.
- Hey.
446
00:20:21,555 --> 00:20:22,639
Here you go.
447
00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:25,309
So, what's the latest
with the nanny search?
448
00:20:25,809 --> 00:20:26,810
Little speed bump.
449
00:20:27,352 --> 00:20:29,729
Kellie, the nanny we chose,
can't do Mondays or Fridays
450
00:20:29,730 --> 00:20:30,938
and that is tough for us.
451
00:20:30,939 --> 00:20:33,900
So we offered her an extra $500
for those two days,
452
00:20:33,901 --> 00:20:37,236
but now she's extorting us
because she can hear our desperation.
453
00:20:37,237 --> 00:20:38,863
I said "please" too many times.
454
00:20:38,864 --> 00:20:40,657
No. He did.
455
00:20:42,075 --> 00:20:43,076
500, huh?
456
00:20:43,869 --> 00:20:45,745
Give Liz those two days, I'll pay you six.
457
00:20:45,746 --> 00:20:47,246
- Wait, what?
- That's ridiculous.
458
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:48,289
Fine. 700.
459
00:20:48,290 --> 00:20:50,250
- We're not taking money from you.
- We're not?
460
00:20:50,751 --> 00:20:51,585
We're not.
461
00:20:52,878 --> 00:20:54,004
Well then, let her do it for free.
462
00:20:54,838 --> 00:20:58,258
You'll have someone you trust,
who has a ton of experience.
463
00:20:59,051 --> 00:21:00,218
She'll make your life better.
464
00:21:00,219 --> 00:21:02,429
I mean...
465
00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:08,393
I don't know. Is it crazy
that I think this might just work?
466
00:21:09,353 --> 00:21:10,728
Liz is great with kids.
467
00:21:10,729 --> 00:21:12,104
- Yeah.
- Yes.
468
00:21:12,105 --> 00:21:14,816
Plus, when the baby's asleep,
I'm sure she'll do some light housework.
469
00:21:18,028 --> 00:21:19,278
Fuck you.
470
00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:20,364
Did you see it?
471
00:21:22,449 --> 00:21:25,035
Okay, all right.
That was almost worth the ride over.
472
00:21:26,203 --> 00:21:29,038
- There's really only two caveats.
- Yeah?
473
00:21:29,039 --> 00:21:30,289
First, when you ask her,
474
00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:31,833
- this didn't come from me.
- Deal.
475
00:21:31,834 --> 00:21:33,960
Second, even though
she's only doing two days,
476
00:21:33,961 --> 00:21:37,046
Liz is going to want to be in charge
of the other nanny.
477
00:21:37,047 --> 00:21:38,673
- No.
- You don't know that.
478
00:21:38,674 --> 00:21:39,842
I feel like I do.
479
00:21:40,342 --> 00:21:41,343
Wow.
480
00:21:45,681 --> 00:21:46,723
Hey, Lurch.
481
00:21:48,141 --> 00:21:49,350
You good with your hands?
482
00:21:49,351 --> 00:21:50,810
You mean, like, sexually?
483
00:21:50,811 --> 00:21:52,395
Why would I want to know that?
484
00:21:52,396 --> 00:21:55,107
I have no idea. That's why I was confused.
485
00:21:55,858 --> 00:21:57,567
I mean, yes, I am good with them that way.
486
00:21:57,568 --> 00:21:59,443
Cool, I'll spread the word.
487
00:21:59,444 --> 00:22:01,572
- Appreciate that.
- Catch.
488
00:22:04,950 --> 00:22:05,950
Holy shit.
489
00:22:05,951 --> 00:22:07,285
I finally got one.
490
00:22:07,286 --> 00:22:09,746
It's the one we found
when we were looking together.
491
00:22:10,497 --> 00:22:11,331
I love you.
492
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:13,082
Thank you, Liz.
493
00:22:13,083 --> 00:22:15,209
Are you still fucked up about Alice?
494
00:22:15,210 --> 00:22:19,046
Yeah. Just over here
trying to find a little courage.
495
00:22:19,047 --> 00:22:20,048
I get it.
496
00:22:22,092 --> 00:22:23,093
Jimmy,
497
00:22:23,594 --> 00:22:28,264
bravery is not about not being scared,
498
00:22:28,265 --> 00:22:33,520
it's about not having to do the scary
thing and not feeling like you're...
499
00:22:35,105 --> 00:22:37,565
but you do it anyway, you know?
500
00:22:37,566 --> 00:22:38,775
It's like that.
501
00:22:40,485 --> 00:22:41,486
Love you too.
502
00:22:42,279 --> 00:22:43,113
Now go away.
503
00:22:50,662 --> 00:22:53,999
Hey, it's me. I'm headed over to Gaby's.
504
00:22:54,708 --> 00:22:55,708
I really need to talk.
505
00:22:55,709 --> 00:22:57,210
Hey, Dad.
506
00:22:57,211 --> 00:22:58,295
Goodbye.
507
00:22:59,838 --> 00:23:01,173
I just left you a message.
508
00:23:01,924 --> 00:23:03,132
I heard.
509
00:23:03,133 --> 00:23:04,927
Summer told me how you helped her out.
510
00:23:06,011 --> 00:23:08,180
That was cool. That was very you.
511
00:23:09,932 --> 00:23:11,725
Yes.
512
00:23:15,020 --> 00:23:16,395
I need to say something to you.
513
00:23:16,396 --> 00:23:20,358
And it's probably something
that I should've done a long time ago.
514
00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,276
You don't have to say anything. You don't.
515
00:23:22,277 --> 00:23:27,073
I don't care if you ever talk to Louis.
516
00:23:27,074 --> 00:23:29,158
Honestly, that wasn't fair of me to ask.
517
00:23:29,159 --> 00:23:30,410
And I love you.
518
00:23:31,745 --> 00:23:32,578
Very much.
519
00:23:32,579 --> 00:23:33,871
Fuck!
520
00:23:33,872 --> 00:23:35,541
- Fuck!
- What?
521
00:23:36,208 --> 00:23:37,208
- What?
- Me?
522
00:23:37,209 --> 00:23:38,293
- Yeah.
- Nothing.
523
00:23:39,878 --> 00:23:42,506
It would just be so easy
not to say my thing now.
524
00:23:43,131 --> 00:23:44,298
Don't have to say it.
525
00:23:44,299 --> 00:23:45,425
I think I really do.
526
00:23:59,940 --> 00:24:02,609
Kid, every parent...
527
00:24:04,570 --> 00:24:07,780
likes to believe that if something
really bad ever happens,
528
00:24:07,781 --> 00:24:10,409
that they are gonna rise to the occasion.
529
00:24:11,076 --> 00:24:12,493
I certainly believed that about myself.
530
00:24:12,494 --> 00:24:15,414
That I was gonna be the hero, you know?
531
00:24:16,707 --> 00:24:18,125
That I was gonna be your hero.
532
00:24:20,002 --> 00:24:21,128
And I was not.
533
00:24:22,754 --> 00:24:26,258
And so, when Louis
came back into our lives,
534
00:24:27,384 --> 00:24:30,137
he was like this walking, talking
reminder for me
535
00:24:31,972 --> 00:24:37,186
of how I just really let you down
when you needed me the most.
536
00:24:37,978 --> 00:24:39,812
You know, your mom and I,
we used to always say
537
00:24:39,813 --> 00:24:41,982
that you're the best thing
that ever happened to us.
538
00:24:43,567 --> 00:24:44,693
Boy, is it true.
539
00:24:45,277 --> 00:24:47,321
And she also made me promise
I was not gonna fuck it up.
540
00:24:49,198 --> 00:24:50,741
And I did. I fucked up.
541
00:24:52,034 --> 00:24:53,160
I fucked it up.
542
00:24:57,372 --> 00:24:58,873
Alice, you are who you are,
543
00:24:58,874 --> 00:25:01,293
this amazing woman,
544
00:25:03,295 --> 00:25:04,588
in spite of me.
545
00:25:05,380 --> 00:25:06,672
And I keep getting stuck on that.
546
00:25:06,673 --> 00:25:09,343
I keep getting stuck on
what a terrible father I am.
547
00:25:13,096 --> 00:25:14,681
And I'm just so sorry.
548
00:25:17,017 --> 00:25:18,977
I'm just so, so, sorry...
549
00:25:22,564 --> 00:25:23,982
that I am not better.
550
00:25:27,736 --> 00:25:30,030
You're right. You did fuck up.
551
00:25:31,406 --> 00:25:35,244
But, Dad, you're leaving out
so much of the good stuff.
552
00:25:35,827 --> 00:25:37,079
So many memories.
553
00:25:37,704 --> 00:25:42,041
All the trips we went on,
all the times I rode on your shoulders.
554
00:25:42,042 --> 00:25:44,461
You climbed trees with me
and got a concussion.
555
00:25:45,128 --> 00:25:46,504
You showed me how to skateboard
556
00:25:46,505 --> 00:25:48,005
and got a concussion.
557
00:25:48,006 --> 00:25:51,050
Hey, you taught me Spanish
because Mom couldn't.
558
00:25:51,051 --> 00:25:53,719
She was so good at languages
but just didn't have the patience for me,
559
00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:57,808
and you would sit here with me for hours,
and you would never get annoyed.
560
00:25:59,685 --> 00:26:03,438
Soy... estoy berenjena, papá.
561
00:26:05,023 --> 00:26:06,732
You just said "I'm an eggplant."
562
00:26:06,733 --> 00:26:09,069
I never said I got good at it.
563
00:26:10,863 --> 00:26:14,616
You know, after Mom died...
during the worst times,
564
00:26:16,451 --> 00:26:21,581
there was this one night
that I was really tired after practice
565
00:26:21,582 --> 00:26:23,792
and passed out on the couch.
566
00:26:26,170 --> 00:26:29,506
And in the morning, I woke up,
and I was in my room.
567
00:26:31,175 --> 00:26:35,596
Even at your lowest,
you still carried me upstairs.
568
00:26:36,805 --> 00:26:38,932
And that let me know
that you were still in there.
569
00:26:39,433 --> 00:26:43,478
So, yeah, maybe you were
a bad dad for a second,
570
00:26:45,105 --> 00:26:49,568
but, hey, you are also
the best fucking dad.
571
00:26:50,652 --> 00:26:53,322
And I am so lucky that you are mine.
572
00:26:54,364 --> 00:26:56,200
Hija mía, te quiero.
573
00:26:58,327 --> 00:26:59,328
Come here.
574
00:27:02,915 --> 00:27:05,041
Did you say something nice in Spanish?
575
00:27:05,042 --> 00:27:07,126
Because I thought I made it clear
I don't understand it.
576
00:27:07,127 --> 00:27:08,961
I know. It was a weird choice on my part.
577
00:27:08,962 --> 00:27:10,047
Yeah.
578
00:27:12,174 --> 00:27:15,886
I am not gonna be fucking late!
Be ready in five minutes!
579
00:27:19,348 --> 00:27:20,516
Will, honey.
580
00:27:21,141 --> 00:27:22,141
Yeah, Mom?
581
00:27:22,142 --> 00:27:24,977
Do you think that's appropriate
Thanksgiving attire?
582
00:27:24,978 --> 00:27:25,978
What's wrong with it?
583
00:27:25,979 --> 00:27:27,605
Well, you're wearing ripped jeans
584
00:27:27,606 --> 00:27:29,941
and a backwards baseball cap
that says "fuckboy."
585
00:27:29,942 --> 00:27:31,526
She's right. Go change your pants.
586
00:27:31,527 --> 00:27:32,735
And put my hat back.
587
00:27:32,736 --> 00:27:34,446
- Fine.
- Dear God.
588
00:27:35,531 --> 00:27:37,782
- Hey. Hey, guys.
- Hiya.
589
00:27:37,783 --> 00:27:39,617
- Hi.
- To what do we owe
590
00:27:39,618 --> 00:27:41,244
this unexpected pleasure?
591
00:27:41,245 --> 00:27:46,207
Liz, it turns out that Kellie can only
be our nanny part-time.
592
00:27:46,208 --> 00:27:47,458
Oh, no.
593
00:27:47,459 --> 00:27:49,210
Now this may sound crazy,
594
00:27:49,211 --> 00:27:53,715
but would you ever in a million years
consider covering for us two days a week?
595
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:00,555
- He put you up to this?
- Damn it.
596
00:28:00,556 --> 00:28:01,889
- No.
- He mentioned it.
597
00:28:01,890 --> 00:28:03,182
Yes.
598
00:28:03,183 --> 00:28:04,517
But we aren't letting him pay us.
599
00:28:04,518 --> 00:28:06,143
- Babe.
- Unless that's something you want?
600
00:28:06,144 --> 00:28:09,106
- Dude, you are killing me.
- Jesus fucking Christ.
601
00:28:09,690 --> 00:28:14,360
I never understood why you look down
on yourself for "just being a mom."
602
00:28:14,361 --> 00:28:18,991
Yes, you're an amazing photographer,
the world's only rock tumbler,
603
00:28:20,659 --> 00:28:23,704
but you love raising kids.
604
00:28:24,621 --> 00:28:26,832
That purpose that you've been looking for?
605
00:28:28,125 --> 00:28:29,251
That's it.
606
00:28:32,588 --> 00:28:33,839
That is your gift.
607
00:28:40,929 --> 00:28:41,762
I'll do it.
608
00:28:41,763 --> 00:28:43,098
- Yes!
- Yeah.
609
00:28:44,766 --> 00:28:46,017
Thank you.
610
00:28:46,018 --> 00:28:48,519
I'm gonna need to be in charge
of the other nanny.
611
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:50,062
- We've already told her.
- Okay.
612
00:28:50,063 --> 00:28:51,439
What up, pimps?
613
00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:54,193
Summer, I'm having a baby.
614
00:28:54,902 --> 00:28:56,527
Congrats.
615
00:28:56,528 --> 00:28:58,530
I just dodged that bullet.
616
00:29:00,240 --> 00:29:01,325
Oh, God.
617
00:29:03,243 --> 00:29:05,995
- I talked to him. I did. I put a condom...
- You didn't talk to him, obviously.
618
00:29:05,996 --> 00:29:08,206
- ...in every crack in that room.
- You need to have a box in...
619
00:29:08,207 --> 00:29:12,419
So, we going straight to In-N-Out,
or you wanna go pick up your goats first?
620
00:29:13,587 --> 00:29:14,588
Fine.
621
00:29:15,923 --> 00:29:17,840
Perfect way to spend Thanksgiving, huh?
622
00:29:17,841 --> 00:29:21,220
Eating burgers, watching football.
623
00:29:24,806 --> 00:29:26,767
Wait a second,
this is not the way to In-N-Out.
624
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:31,479
Why are you dressed up?
Am I being kidnapped again?
625
00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:34,233
Oh, come on,
you'd be sad if we missed Gaby's.
626
00:29:34,775 --> 00:29:35,942
It's only for a few hours,
627
00:29:35,943 --> 00:29:39,613
and I brought your meds in case
you wanna take them again before dinner.
628
00:29:40,364 --> 00:29:43,241
But look, I'm not even dressed for this.
629
00:29:43,242 --> 00:29:44,535
Your blazer's in the trunk.
630
00:29:47,204 --> 00:29:49,247
Help! I'm being kidnapped!
631
00:29:49,248 --> 00:29:51,374
- Jesus's sakes, will you calm down?
- Anybody!
632
00:29:51,375 --> 00:29:52,459
Jesus.
633
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:54,503
Worst Thanksgiving ever.
634
00:29:59,591 --> 00:30:02,176
- Hey! Who grabs beans?
- I do.
635
00:30:02,177 --> 00:30:05,137
- Oh, my God. That turkey looks amazing.
- Thank you.
636
00:30:05,138 --> 00:30:06,597
- Holy shit.
- I trussed and brushed it,
637
00:30:06,598 --> 00:30:08,641
- and then dipped it in an orange glaze.
- Girl, yeah.
638
00:30:08,642 --> 00:30:09,934
Okay, too much lingo.
639
00:30:09,935 --> 00:30:12,979
You wanna look me in the eyes
and tell me you actually made all this?
640
00:30:12,980 --> 00:30:15,189
You keep your mouth shut,
or I'll orange glaze your ass,
641
00:30:15,190 --> 00:30:16,357
and I know that sounds sexual,
642
00:30:16,358 --> 00:30:17,817
- but it's not.
- Understood.
643
00:30:17,818 --> 00:30:19,902
All right, D, you wanna carve this bird?
'Cause I don't know how to.
644
00:30:19,903 --> 00:30:21,113
Yes, ma'am.
645
00:30:21,947 --> 00:30:23,489
D-man's time to shine.
646
00:30:23,490 --> 00:30:25,116
- Look out, ladies! Coming through.
- Jesus Christ.
647
00:30:25,117 --> 00:30:26,577
- Come on. Here we go.
- Okay.
648
00:30:27,327 --> 00:30:29,203
- Coat. Get it off.
- What?
649
00:30:29,204 --> 00:30:32,165
All right, I don't know what I'm doing,
but I know it doesn't take all this.
650
00:30:34,501 --> 00:30:36,460
This bird looks like
it's gonna take all this.
651
00:30:36,461 --> 00:30:37,379
Oh, God.
652
00:30:44,595 --> 00:30:46,762
- That's such a good one.
- Yeah.
653
00:30:46,763 --> 00:30:48,681
So now that we're all
in the Covenant of the Rock,
654
00:30:48,682 --> 00:30:49,766
is there a secret handshake?
655
00:30:50,475 --> 00:30:51,475
He's ruining it.
656
00:30:51,476 --> 00:30:53,436
Just give him a secret handshake.
657
00:30:53,437 --> 00:30:55,355
Come on. It'll just be this with a snap.
658
00:30:56,481 --> 00:30:57,481
I hate that!
659
00:30:57,482 --> 00:30:58,733
Okay, easy, Liz.
660
00:30:58,734 --> 00:31:00,526
- Hey, Julie.
- Hi, honey.
661
00:31:00,527 --> 00:31:01,653
Hi, Paul.
662
00:31:02,779 --> 00:31:03,988
I'm here under duress.
663
00:31:03,989 --> 00:31:07,033
Stop saying that.
You got your sweatpants on.
664
00:31:07,034 --> 00:31:09,368
You can still scratch your balls
when no one's looking.
665
00:31:09,369 --> 00:31:11,495
I don't care if anybody's looking or not.
666
00:31:11,496 --> 00:31:13,664
And you, you Judas.
667
00:31:13,665 --> 00:31:16,667
You knew that she was gonna abduct me,
and you said nothing?
668
00:31:16,668 --> 00:31:19,921
Hey, pal, if you're not here,
I'm not even invited.
669
00:31:19,922 --> 00:31:21,632
And don't touch the cheese with that hand.
670
00:31:22,591 --> 00:31:23,966
Okay, everybody.
671
00:31:23,967 --> 00:31:26,969
Before we start the buffet, I just wanna
make one quick announcement.
672
00:31:26,970 --> 00:31:28,012
Yes, Liz?
673
00:31:28,013 --> 00:31:30,806
Why is Aliyah in the kitchen with you?
674
00:31:30,807 --> 00:31:32,267
You're okay, all right?
675
00:31:32,851 --> 00:31:36,896
Happy Thanksgiving.
This holiday is all about togetherness.
676
00:31:36,897 --> 00:31:38,272
- No.
- Okay.
677
00:31:38,273 --> 00:31:40,399
So, I'd like all you kids
to put your cell phones
678
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:41,817
in this damn basket, all right?
679
00:31:41,818 --> 00:31:43,694
- Hey, you're Matthew, right?
- Yeah.
680
00:31:43,695 --> 00:31:45,613
- How old are you?
- Twenty-three.
681
00:31:45,614 --> 00:31:47,365
- Twenty-four.
- Twenty-four.
682
00:31:47,366 --> 00:31:48,574
Holy shit.
683
00:31:48,575 --> 00:31:50,117
I got the smart one.
684
00:31:50,118 --> 00:31:52,620
Wow. Okay, I really need you
to put your phone in here.
685
00:31:52,621 --> 00:31:53,829
Busted.
686
00:31:53,830 --> 00:31:55,206
- Hey, Brian.
- Yeah, what's up?
687
00:31:55,207 --> 00:31:57,333
We all spoke, and I'm afraid
you're gonna have to cough that up.
688
00:31:57,334 --> 00:31:58,668
- What?
- Yes.
689
00:31:58,669 --> 00:32:00,461
No! This is ridiculous.
690
00:32:00,462 --> 00:32:02,421
Do you all think so little of me?
691
00:32:02,422 --> 00:32:03,965
Just fucking do it.
692
00:32:03,966 --> 00:32:05,716
- Why are you on Wayfair?
- Yeah. I wanted to get
693
00:32:05,717 --> 00:32:07,051
that cute ottoman that you have.
694
00:32:07,052 --> 00:32:09,345
- Thank you. Put your phone in here.
- Okay. I'm sorry.
695
00:32:09,346 --> 00:32:11,389
All right, it's time to eat.
Paul, do you wanna do the honors?
696
00:32:11,390 --> 00:32:13,182
Let's just fucking do it.
697
00:32:13,183 --> 00:32:15,726
- Great. Perfect.
- Okay, here we go.
698
00:32:15,727 --> 00:32:17,562
- We're gonna get private time at dessert.
- I know, but--
699
00:32:17,563 --> 00:32:19,897
- We should have some pie. Okay.
- Yes, I promise.
700
00:32:19,898 --> 00:32:20,983
Hey.
701
00:32:22,818 --> 00:32:24,861
- Here, I didn't lick this one.
- Thank you. I don't want it.
702
00:32:24,862 --> 00:32:27,697
- Uh-huh. All right, thank you.
- Thank you.
703
00:32:27,698 --> 00:32:31,117
- Hey, it's your turn. Come on.
- One sec.
704
00:32:31,118 --> 00:32:33,412
- And there it is. Love you.
- Thank you. I love you.
705
00:32:37,082 --> 00:32:38,834
- Hey, can you hand me that?
- Sure.
706
00:32:39,376 --> 00:32:40,377
Thanks.
707
00:32:41,879 --> 00:32:43,588
Why the hell did he make us open today?
708
00:32:43,589 --> 00:32:47,384
We've had, like, one customer,
and they ordered 50 turkey sandwiches.
709
00:32:48,093 --> 00:32:49,094
Yeah, right?
710
00:32:52,514 --> 00:32:54,849
What time exactly do you want me
to come round later?
711
00:32:54,850 --> 00:32:57,852
'Cause this pudding takes
a very specific amount of time to cook,
712
00:32:57,853 --> 00:33:00,189
and if it's one minute over, it's a brick.
713
00:33:01,648 --> 00:33:02,858
Yeah, about that...
714
00:33:04,902 --> 00:33:06,027
Fuck.
715
00:33:06,028 --> 00:33:08,989
So, I told some of my friends
you were coming, and...
716
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:14,786
You never told me that you got drunk
and murdered someone.
717
00:33:16,580 --> 00:33:22,044
And so, now, I think that it just
might be, like, weird for you to be there.
718
00:33:23,587 --> 00:33:25,380
It's okay.
719
00:33:30,260 --> 00:33:31,511
I'm sorry, man.
720
00:33:31,512 --> 00:33:32,596
Don't be.
721
00:33:33,597 --> 00:33:34,598
I understand.
722
00:33:36,850 --> 00:33:38,143
Shit, man.
723
00:33:40,229 --> 00:33:41,229
Look, Louis, I--
724
00:33:41,230 --> 00:33:43,106
Why don't you go, and I'll...
725
00:33:43,607 --> 00:33:44,608
I'll lock up.
726
00:33:46,109 --> 00:33:47,110
All right.
727
00:33:55,744 --> 00:33:56,745
Hey.
728
00:34:00,582 --> 00:34:01,875
Happy Thanksgiving, man.
729
00:34:04,169 --> 00:34:05,212
You too.
730
00:34:19,685 --> 00:34:21,311
Cheers to the chef.
731
00:34:23,938 --> 00:34:25,064
To Sean!
732
00:34:25,065 --> 00:34:26,189
- I knew it.
- Yeah.
733
00:34:26,190 --> 00:34:27,109
No.
734
00:34:27,609 --> 00:34:30,945
Okay, our mom couldn't make it today,
735
00:34:30,946 --> 00:34:34,240
but I would like to carry on
one of her favorite traditions.
736
00:34:34,241 --> 00:34:37,828
So, let's go around the room and everybody
say what they're thankful for.
737
00:34:39,371 --> 00:34:40,620
Who wants to start?
738
00:34:40,621 --> 00:34:45,084
First of all, I wanna say how thankful
I am to welcome Jorge into our home,
739
00:34:45,085 --> 00:34:46,920
but, Mom, you have to calm down.
740
00:34:47,504 --> 00:34:49,088
But look how cute he is.
741
00:34:49,089 --> 00:34:50,424
I just can't turn it off, bro.
742
00:34:51,925 --> 00:34:52,926
But most of all,
743
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,847
I wanna say how grateful I am
that we're all together again.
744
00:34:58,098 --> 00:34:59,683
It means so much to me.
745
00:35:02,936 --> 00:35:03,937
Love you too, Dad.
746
00:35:04,438 --> 00:35:05,981
I'm thankful for my family.
747
00:35:07,524 --> 00:35:08,525
Me too.
748
00:35:10,235 --> 00:35:11,444
That's all of you guys.
749
00:35:11,445 --> 00:35:13,197
For my husband.
750
00:35:15,407 --> 00:35:16,574
For my wife.
751
00:35:16,575 --> 00:35:17,491
Hello?
752
00:35:17,492 --> 00:35:18,535
- Seriously?
- What the fuck?
753
00:35:19,578 --> 00:35:20,913
- What the heck?
- Fine.
754
00:35:21,496 --> 00:35:23,206
- For our boys too.
- Yeah.
755
00:35:23,207 --> 00:35:27,252
I'm thankful
to just be included, honestly.
756
00:35:28,420 --> 00:35:29,629
She took mine.
757
00:35:29,630 --> 00:35:32,549
But, seriously, I am very thankful
to have been included.
758
00:35:33,383 --> 00:35:34,885
I'm thankful for my sister.
759
00:35:37,054 --> 00:35:38,764
For my handsome new roommate.
760
00:35:41,683 --> 00:35:44,478
That next Thanksgiving,
we'll both be dads.
761
00:35:46,480 --> 00:35:47,481
That...
762
00:35:48,774 --> 00:35:50,442
Paul's done with that turkey leg.
763
00:35:52,361 --> 00:35:55,739
That I get to be here
and not at fucking Morongo.
764
00:36:00,369 --> 00:36:01,370
Okay.
765
00:36:02,955 --> 00:36:03,829
I guess it's my turn.
766
00:36:03,830 --> 00:36:05,207
Your turn for what?
767
00:36:06,583 --> 00:36:08,669
Hey. Sorry I'm late.
768
00:36:09,586 --> 00:36:13,047
It's okay. I was just trying
to figure out what I'm thankful for.
769
00:36:13,048 --> 00:36:14,132
You'll come up with something.
770
00:36:15,300 --> 00:36:17,301
And I know you mentioned
everyone had to bring something so,
771
00:36:17,302 --> 00:36:18,678
I brought your mom.
772
00:36:18,679 --> 00:36:20,513
- Oh, shit. Hey, that's not my mom.
- Oh, God.
773
00:36:20,514 --> 00:36:22,682
- No.
- Did you just take some random lady?
774
00:36:22,683 --> 00:36:24,768
No, I didn't take a random lady.
This is my aunt.
775
00:36:25,352 --> 00:36:26,519
- Jesus.
- Yeah, fuck.
776
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:27,604
That's your mom.
777
00:36:28,522 --> 00:36:29,523
I brought pie.
778
00:36:33,652 --> 00:36:34,652
That's so sweet.
779
00:36:34,653 --> 00:36:35,820
What kind of pie?
780
00:36:35,821 --> 00:36:37,071
Apple.
781
00:36:37,072 --> 00:36:38,991
- What kind of apple?
- Babe.
782
00:37:03,182 --> 00:37:04,641
Attention, passengers.
783
00:37:05,392 --> 00:37:08,228
The next train to Union Station
is now approaching.
784
00:37:08,729 --> 00:37:12,648
Please stand behind the yellow line
until the train comes to a complete stop.
785
00:37:12,649 --> 00:37:13,775
Thank you.
786
00:37:25,871 --> 00:37:28,414
- Hey, wait. I need you to try this.
- Oh, my God.
787
00:37:28,415 --> 00:37:30,375
It's so good.
788
00:37:31,460 --> 00:37:32,794
- Nice move.
- I try.
789
00:37:33,837 --> 00:37:35,047
I didn't go yet.
790
00:37:37,549 --> 00:37:38,800
I didn't go yet.
791
00:37:39,843 --> 00:37:40,969
Hey, I didn't go yet.
792
00:37:43,263 --> 00:37:45,974
Most of you know
that I'm here under duress.
793
00:37:47,392 --> 00:37:50,061
I don't really like
being the center of attention.
794
00:37:50,062 --> 00:37:51,938
- That's not true.
- I doubt that.
795
00:37:51,939 --> 00:37:53,649
It is when I'm not in control.
796
00:37:54,816 --> 00:37:58,487
Like I wasn't in control of...
about being here today,
797
00:37:59,863 --> 00:38:01,615
I'm also not in control of this.
798
00:38:02,491 --> 00:38:04,868
I didn't take my pills because I...
799
00:38:05,452 --> 00:38:09,081
I wanna save them
for when I really need them.
800
00:38:10,707 --> 00:38:12,125
Not to hide from you.
801
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:16,088
Sometimes it's hard
not to feel sorry for myself.
802
00:38:17,172 --> 00:38:20,300
You know, poor me with my...
803
00:38:22,261 --> 00:38:24,388
failed, fragile body.
804
00:38:26,181 --> 00:38:32,271
But then, I look around this room and...
805
00:38:36,358 --> 00:38:39,027
and I say to myself...
806
00:38:42,906 --> 00:38:43,907
"Lucky guy.
807
00:38:46,368 --> 00:38:47,411
I'm a lucky guy."
808
00:38:51,456 --> 00:38:55,836
I don't know how much longer
I'm gonna have to...
809
00:38:58,046 --> 00:39:02,968
to work with you, hang out with you,
laugh with you.
810
00:39:05,512 --> 00:39:09,765
Road's gonna get tougher and tougher.
811
00:39:09,766 --> 00:39:11,810
But I do know that I'll get through it
812
00:39:13,729 --> 00:39:16,815
because of everyone...
everyone in this room.
813
00:39:21,695 --> 00:39:24,698
And that's what I'm...
that's what I'm thankful for.
814
00:39:25,908 --> 00:39:27,659
'Cause we can get through anything...
815
00:39:30,454 --> 00:39:33,624
if we have people to lean on.
816
00:39:35,209 --> 00:39:38,504
I'm leaning on you. I'm leaning on you.
817
00:39:57,814 --> 00:39:58,899
Okay.
818
00:40:03,737 --> 00:40:04,780
Switch.
819
00:40:06,615 --> 00:40:07,824
Love you.
820
00:40:26,802 --> 00:40:28,637
Paul, I'd like you to meet my sons.
821
00:40:42,818 --> 00:40:43,818
Yes.
822
00:40:43,819 --> 00:40:45,529
Yes, yes, yes.
823
00:40:51,159 --> 00:40:52,159
Thank you.
824
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:53,495
Yes, of course.
825
00:41:21,273 --> 00:41:22,357
Hey, man.
826
00:41:28,655 --> 00:41:32,117
Turns out my daughter is more addicted
to her cell phone than I realized.
827
00:41:32,618 --> 00:41:34,703
They were in a basket. It's a long story.
828
00:41:37,539 --> 00:41:38,707
Why are you here?
829
00:41:41,752 --> 00:41:44,421
I guess I'm here for her. For Alice.
830
00:41:49,801 --> 00:41:51,303
I'm probably also here for Tia.
831
00:42:02,564 --> 00:42:04,233
Mostly, I'm here for me.
832
00:42:33,679 --> 00:42:35,681
What a shitty couple of years, huh?
833
00:42:44,648 --> 00:42:45,649
Yeah.
834
00:42:51,363 --> 00:42:53,240
How about her? What's her story?
835
00:42:58,453 --> 00:43:00,121
Well, she's obviously a schoolteacher.
836
00:43:00,122 --> 00:43:03,624
And she's just realized she's forgotten
something very important.
837
00:43:03,625 --> 00:43:06,461
Big test day. No No. 2 pencils.
838
00:43:07,045 --> 00:43:09,548
- It's a nightmare.
- It's not the first time it's happened.
839
00:43:10,299 --> 00:43:12,675
How about this guy?
He's a brooding rock star.
840
00:43:12,676 --> 00:43:15,596
No, I know that guy. He's an assassin.