You alright, nan?
Yeah. Nothing that a nice cup of tea won't sort.
It's careers fair today, isn't it?
-Don't really wanna go. -Why? It's your future.
They're late.
It's only just half past.
What good is it having someone come in if they can't even be on time?
We've been through this. We need some help now.
-Hi. -Hi.
I'm Jaz. Carer.
Right, well you're late.
Yeah, sorry. My phone died on the way here
and then I thought I'd lost my bank card
but then I realised it was just stuck up my sleeve.
It's really easily done actually.
You don't have to worry. I'll take good care of... Susan.
You've just gotta let me in first.
Susie? Here I come ready or not.
As low points go, this is kind of the lowest.
Is this your first panic attack?
It wasn't a panic attack.
The paramedic who brought you in said he found you in a foetal position
in a supermarket so...
Yeah it'd just been a really, really long day.
We did notice a high level of alcohol in your blood.
If this happens again the consequences could be more serious.
No, it won't happen again. Last night was a wake up call.
Gonna sort myself out.
Start now. Get some rest.
I will.
Well if there's one good thing about being at your lowest point
it's that from here every way is up.
Are you finished with this? Your cup?
Yeah, it's done.
Any good?
-Oh third time I've read it. -That's a lot of times.
-Where do I know you from? -I don't...
And that's not a chat up line by the way.
I tried it once it didn't work. Can I get you anything else?
Oh no thanks.
I know where I've seen you. The club West One.
You know holding a broken bottle to someone's neck is assault.
Well I didn't assault you. No one got hurt.
Yeah luckily for me. And I probably deserved it, I was a bit of a prick.
You don't take any shit, do you?
Not if I can help it.
Look, Brett, I don't know what you want.
Why don't you let me buy you a drink and we'll call it even.
Gotta have a plan. Everyone says.
So what do I, Jonny Murphy, want to do?
The possibilities are endless.
Time to move on from the past and face it, the future.
Because apparently the world is my oyster.
I mean I've never actually had oysters.
Not even sure I like the sound of them but you know gotta start somewhere.
...lead the world in areas including stem cells, sciences, e-health.
Fascinating. Thank you.
Thank you.
Careers fairs, where dreams go to die.
Why are we taking job advice from people who grew up to give job advice?
Give it a chance.
-Hi. -Oh hi.
Are you trying to find somebody better to talk to?
No, just trying to make the most of the opportunities.
Why, everything's either shit work or zero hours contracts.
There it is.
-Super media plus. -The woman who runs it is amazing.
She put on Instagram she was offering internships so see you.
At Super Media Plus we like to say there's no I in team
but there is a U in super and that could be you.
Please do scan the barcode thing for details, many thanks.
-Hi. -Hi.
I'd really love the opportunity to intern with you.
Great. Do you have any experience in PR?
-No, I don't. -Oh dear. Well maybe next time.
I do have a lot of social media experience.
Right. Keeping up with all your friends. Sounds fun.
One of my posts got two million views and 30,000 followers.
-Do you think you could do Friday? -Yeah. Yeah I'd love to.
Great. That's a lot of leaflets.
Yeah I'm kind of just collecting them to keep Gareth happy.
I don't really see the point 'cause I've already got a job but...
The part time one. The leisure centre.
Yeah but I don't wanna let 'em down.
-Don't you make an adorable couple. -Oh we're not a couple actually.
See you later then.
He's a funny little chap, isn't he?
I've gotta get back to Nan.
She's not used to having strangers in the house and I'm worried
if I hang around here someone's gonna try and make me join the army.
See you. Fine.
-You interested in volunteering? -Yeah.
Yes of course you can. Very important you want to travel the world as well.
Hey Nif.
Marcus. I didn't know you...
Yeah, I did this last year so I'm one of the ambassadors
and you're into wildlife conservation.
Definitely. Where do I sign up?
The application deadline is 9:00 a.m. this Sunday.
Like Glastonbury tickets.
Should I leave you with one of my CVs in the meantime?
-Sure. -It's probably terrible.
I'm actually embarrassed.
Is there a problem?
It's just...
Yeah, sorry, I don't mean to be rude, there are good grades
but all I can see here is a bit of music, bare minimum community work.
-I mean no commitment to anything. -Give it back please.
I'm sorry. Look, ditch the CV.
Write a personal statement who you are, what you'll bring,
I don't mind helping.
No, thanks. I'm fine on my own.
Dick.
So here they are. All the endless possibilities.
In a hall.
In Welwyn Garden City.
Hi.
How would I, what would I do to do what you do?
You're interested in training as an engineer?
Well you would be looking for high grades in science, maths, any of the design...
Yeah, I haven't actually done any of those so...
Well I've got a family business which is a pub so...
A pub?
Right, I think there's a stall in the other room for that.
They're showing people how to carry trays.
Dick.
Alright. So I know what I'm gonna do now.
Me too. I'm gonna do the rainforest conservation program.
Something meaningful.
Oh yeah. Sipping cocktails on a drugged up elephant, sounds fun.
There are no elephants in Costa Rica.
Then I'll probably still be working at the gym.
Might just probably be really ripped or something.
What's your plan Jonny?
I'm gonna work in the pub.
Wow, the lofty heights of bar tending.
-What like my dad? -Shit, no, I didn't mean it like that.
Good. 'Cause that's what I'm gonna do.
-You'll die. -No, don't.
What's going on?
We've been having such a laugh. Jaz taught me poker.
Well at least I think this is how you play poker. Ah surprise.
Jaz, can I speak with you for a minute?
Sure. No cheating.
Susan is lovely.
She's been telling me all about your emo phase.
I just need to check a couple of things. Are you on top of her medication?
-Yes. -And she's had enough fluids?
Yes. Drill sergeant, yes. I mean obviously yeah. This is my job.
-Looks like she enjoyed you being here. -Haven't been able to get a word in.
She did seem to have one thing on her mind
and maybe this is none of my business but she seems a bit concerned about you.
-Me? -Yeah.
Worried you're not living your life 'cause you're always thinking about her.
She wants you to enjoy yourself you know live a little.
Instead of just ironing your towels and doing the washing up.
Jaz, I'm glad Nan's had fun but you're right, it is none of your business.
And I reckon you shouldn't get involved in things you don't know about.
Loud and clear, Sarge.
It's so obvious, I mean it's been right under my nose.
The pub is the answer.
I mean it's literally downstairs.
I'll follow in dad's footsteps. Finish what he started. Make him proud.
'Cause it's not just the future, is it?
It's my future.
And no one's gonna fix it but me.
So have you always wanted to work in a gym?
I just think that fitness is important to people.
Here's some uniform.
Thanks.
Just like old times. You never liked getting changed.
Kyle Dunster. We did scouts.
Cuffley camp.
We went hiking and you refused to go skinny dipping.
I can't believe you don't remember me.
Yeah. I'm sorry I just, you know...
Done.
-Does it look okay? -Yeah, it suits you.
You can put your stuff in this locker.
There's a knack.
Took me two months to work that one out.
Need anything else just let me know, yeah?
Cool.
-Here we go. -No, no. There's nothing on.
-Hi. -Gosh I was such... Darling.
Oh look what we've found. Look at you.
Nothing on but your little welly boots filling the paddling pool.
-It's a strong look, I won't lie. -So cute. So cute.
What's with the music?
Jaz found all my CDs up in the attic. This is me.
From when she was in the Welwyn Garden City orchestra.
-No, she wasn't. -Yes, I was.
When?
Oh, on and off for years.
Oh right.
Look at that. I remember those.
I can do that if you like.
How do I not know that about my nan? Spend every day with her.
You're busy doing literally everything else.
This house would stop existing without you.
We don't really have time to talk about things like that.
Life's all about the small stuff.
She says you never have any friends over.
Why don't you? This weekend.
Sounds very stressful.
They'll make a mess and they don't know any of my systems.
Nobody knows all of your systems, Regan. It's fine, I'll help you.
Come on, it'll be fun. Oh you can wear your wellies,
yeah, I've seen them in your cupboard.
Don't pretend you still couldn't rock that look if you had to.
There's not much time for anything else, it's just uni, work and working out.
So who was that boy you were with at the club?
-Is he your boyfriend? -No, he's just no one.
He's just someone I know.
Yeah, he looked like a bit of a dickhead.
He is.
So tell me more about this auto visual art.
Audio visual art.
See? You are too clever to be hanging around with someone like me.
Maybe I am.
This is fast.
Sorry.
Just can't help myself.
Can I get you another drink?
Yeah, then I should be getting home.
-I can drop you. -I can walk. I'm not too far from here.
-Landis road, yeah. -Yeah. Did I tell you that?
No. Just seen you round a couple of times.
Hey, guys!
It's Zia here counting you down to Welwyn's sustainable fashion fundraiser.
I mean there might be some tickets on arrival but why risk it.
Link in my bio or check out the Super Media Plus website for more.
You don't wanna miss this people.
What a pro. Thank you. Today's been brilliant.
If you're not too busy, I could really do with some support for the event tomorrow.
Yeah, yeah, no problem. No plans at all.
Now go, it's late.
You've been here longer than people who are actually getting paid.
Don't want to take the piss. Could you take the recycling when you go?
It's the big green bin round the back.
Yeah.
Feels weird not doing this at the pub.
Yeah, well dad's here now.
Well next year maybe we can invite people.
Have a birthday lock in like dad would've wanted.
-Maybe. -It meant everything to him. He loved it.
And so do I so I'm gonna start working at the pub.
You can't.
-It's mum's decision. -Yeah and mum's selling up.
What?
Look we wanted to tell you yeah but you haven't been around.
And even when you have you, you've not really been here.
Oh that's so fucking patronising Andrew.
There's more to running a pub than nicking booze and underage lock ins.
You're 16. This deluded fantasy of yours isn't helping anyone.
-I could do it. -Look at the state of you.
You can't take over a pub. You can't even take care of yourself.
And dad's probably laughing at the thought of it.
Oh fuck.
You've fully lost the plot, mate.
God.
Keeping you busy, are we?
No, it's just my friend Regan she's having a party.
Regan Cullen? Oh yeah, we did gymnastics together. She's cool.
Well you, you should come.
Cool.
Did you clean down the treadmills like I asked?
Look, this job isn't very challenging. But you actually need to do some work.
I'm really sorry I...
It's fine. You're new here. You'll get the hang of it all.
Thanks.
But maybe tidy these.
I'm gonna start down there.
-Hi! -Hey.
Mum wanted to drop this off for your mum. Fresh Ata dindin.
Thanks.
-How's the personal statement going? -Finished.
Great. I'll just...
Could you maybe read it?
Sure.
It's actually very good. I'm glad I could help.
-You just sat there and ate my crisps. -Yeah but I did it so well.
I could put a word in for you if you like.
That would be amazing.
You've changed your hair.
You just noticed?
Sorry. My friend's throwing a party tonight.
She doesn't usually throw parties so the group chat's still in shock.
I'm sure we can squeeze you in.
I can't have a big one. I've got football training first thing tomorrow.
Me neither, I've got this thing in the morning too.
Really? What are you doing?
Yoga.
Oh cool. Then maybe, maybe I'll come too.
It's my future. Mine.
So how come other people can just take it away?
Gotta have a plan, everyone says.
But what if you look at the endless possibilities and just see nothing?
Endless infinite fucking nothing.
Right guys, what we having?
I'm not drinking.
-Me neither. -How come?
Nervous okay. I invited Marcus and he's not gonna be drinking.
-You invited more people? -I think I like him.
And literally for the first time ever I actually think he likes me back.
Kind of wish he didn't though 'cause now I've gotta do something about it.
You lost me.
Oh for fuck's sake. You're joking.
What?
Nothing. Back to plan A.
Is everything alright with Nan?
She's in bed, headphones on listening to Hilary Mantel.
She's told you, she wants you to have fun.
Gonna have a great time. Cheers.
Now Benedict's asleep so he really shouldn't be any trouble.
If he acts up don't comfort him,
he needs to learn that screaming will get him nowhere in life.
And Miffy's dog treats are in the cupboard.
I'm sorry?
Look at you. Oh god I'm so sorry you didn't think you were coming, did you?
-No. -It's just it's a very particular vibe.
Even if you did make all that effort. Must have taken you hours.
-Oh honestly it's fine. -I really appreciate your hard work.
Remember it's the only way to get ahead in this industry.
Oh and by the way your live video thingy really paid off.
We sold quite a few more tickets because of that.
Oh really?
Oh so glad. I hope it goes really well.
I'll be back by 10 at the latest, have fun.
Guess who?
Kyle. You came.
I'm sorry about the treadmill thing and my other mistakes.
You worry a lot don't you? It's a waste of energy. Pointless.
You did great. Everyone loves you.
Do they? Thought I was a bit shit.
No not at all. You're good.
Who are you?
This is Kyle. Oh, we work together.
Right so people think they can just invite whoever they want now, do they?
Why don't you go outside, see if you can drag some more people in, Louis?
We went to gymnastics together remember.
Our mums were friends.
Kyle. How are you?
What the hell was that?
-Do you wanna get a drink? -Yeah sure.
Hi, you're through to Jonny. Don't leave a message.
It's fucking freezing.
Here you go.
Thank you. Don't know why I didn't bring a coat. What an idiot.
Hey don't worry about it. It's a waste of energy.
Really enjoyed hanging out with you over the last few days.
You were supposed to be working. Not hanging out.
I'm sorry.
Hi.
I'll go and get us a drink.
So who was that?
It's Kyle from Cuffley camp. I mean, we work together.
Oh right. Was I interrupting anything?
No.
'Cause it's okay if I was.
-No but I just wanted to say sorry. -What for?
About everything really.
It's okay.
No, it's not. 'Cause you're always putting up with my shit.
It's alright. Don't worry about it.
It's cold out here, isn't it?
Yeah, you go inside.
You not coming?
No, I'll be in in a minute.
What you doing in here?
All those people, stuff's getting trashed, it's a nightmare.
Have we been at different parties?
I don't know half of them. Alright like a quarter.
Mum used to have people in the house all the time.
It's like she couldn't hack being alone by herself. Or looking after me.
Regan, everyone's having a great time in there. The house is fine.
Your nan's fine. And you are too. If you wanna be.
You don't know me.
I know you're brave. But I know you're scared too.
And I've never seen someone so stressed at a party look so beautiful.
I mean you're so...
-You're so... -What?
I'm so what?
-Just do it here. -So close.
Neve, you got a minute?
I wanna apologise about the rave.
I didn't mean to get you in any shit you know that.
-Jonny, let's not do this now. -I should always listen to you.
You're the smart one.
You will outgrow me. Outgrow this place.
I wanna give you something for good luck.
Not that you'll need it. But it was my dad's.
Patron saint of travellers.
And you are going places. Costa Rica for a start.
Jonny, I'm quite wasted I can't take this now.
Please.
You're my best friend, Neve.
And I want you to always remember that.
Nif?
Oh my god you came.
Not interrupting am I?
I thought you, 'cause you have a match in the morning.
Decided to come for one and surprise you.
Looks like I need to catch up.
No, I'm fine.
-Are there still drinks? -Yeah, yeah, come.
Nice to meet you.
Jonny? Jonny?
Are you okay?
-What are you doing here? -I read your posts on dark days.
How do you know about that?
You've been pretending like you're fine
and then telling strangers online how shit you really feel.
-You've been spying on me? -Yeah, because you won't talk to me.
Hey what's this about? Mei?
Even if you won't tell me, tell your friends the truth. You need help.
No you need help, Mei.
You're making this up just like you made up about your dad being dead.
-I've explained that to you. -You've explained it.
Like you've explained messing up my dad's pub and stealing my family's money.
And what stealing Neve's phone.
Oh no, wonder your dad wants nothing to do with you.
Fuck you!
Fuck! You're crazy.
I'm not crazy.
Are you filming me? Why the fuck are you filming me?
-What was that about? -Leave it.
-We're not, it's just... -Oh please, just leave it.
I can't deal with any more of their drama.
I could lie here forever. But we should probably get back.
Loud and clear, sarge.
-Did you see where my bra went? -You sort of threw it over there.
-I got a bit carried away. -A bit carried away.
Will you help me find it?
-Maybe in a minute. -Yeah. In a minute.
-Oh, you sure you're okay? -Yeah. I've barely drunk anything.
Right.
-Don't do that. -What?
"Right." Like you're all clever and, and I'm not as clever.
'Cause I'm clever, like really huge clever.
-Do you need some water? -Oh get over yourself.
It's just water.
Look I didn't think you were coming so I went for it okay.
You know what, this is what I am.
What you are is drunk.
No. Marcus look tomorrow when it's over achieving,
Duke of Edinburgh, man of the match that's Marcus land,
but this is my terrain. I'm fine, living life, world.
I don't think it's a competition, Neve.
I've gotta go.
Go on then. You know what, fuck volunteering.
I'm not sad enough to spend my time doing personal statement.
You don't have a life. So you need to feel special. Fucking pathetic!
Right, get the champers out Astrid. Oh hello.
-Supposed to be back hours ago. -You can go now.
Thanks for tonight. I hope Benedict was okay.
Oh and there's another event happening next weekend, I'd love your help with.
Actual help with an event or more free babysitting?
Zia you should be grateful.
People would literally kill to have a chance like this.
Let's talk about that next week.
Oh do you know what we can have a chat about next week
you shoving this internship up your arse.
Oh and Miffy's made a little mess on the stairs so have fun clearing that up.
Hey.
-You wanna drink? -Yeah, go on.
-You want ice? -Yes, please.
-Where are nan's meds? -What?
They're not here. Where the fuck are all my nan's pills.
Why are you asking me? I dunno.
You're the only one who knows where we keep them. Did you take them?
Why would I do that?
-My god! Have you been stealing from us? -Obviously not.
This is exactly why I have to be here for her because everyone else lets us down.
If that's what you really think of me, then I should go.
Yeah, I think you should. I think everyone should.
Right. Everyone get out.
I can't see any future.
So I've made a plan.
Mei?
Mei. It's very dark for you to be on your own.
-Can I give you a lift? -No, thanks, I'll walk.
-You never replied to my message. -Not really into dick pics.
-Well let me just give you a lift home. -No thanks.
-Oh you're such a cock tease. -Get off me.
Look I don't wanna play these games any more, Mei.
-Fuck off! -Look I know you want me.
No, no, no.
-Come on, just give me a kiss. -No !
-Just one kiss, I know you wanna do it. -No. No.
Look stop.
Stop.
I know you want this, Mei. You want it as much I do.
But if Jaz took the pills then what exactly are we looking for?
I don't know. Maybe she didn't take them. I dunno.
Quick question. When did you realise you were gay?
-Why are you asking me this now? -Just making small talk.
I was always pretty sure, Louis. Now can we just...
Yeah, of course.
When did you know what you actually are like gay or bisexual or what?
I guess it's a spectrum. But I always knew I liked girls.
And was that like one person or a feeling?
Louis, I don't have all the answers.
I really wish people would stop coming to me to ask about queer stuff.
Marcus hates me. I've fucked it. Why do I always do this?
Come on, I'll walk you home.
-Come on this way. -This is shit, Louis.
It's alright, it's alright.
Emergency doctors.
Thanks.
What I said was horrible.
I know you didn't take them.
-You're great at your job. -Yeah I am.
It's just me and nan.
We're all we've got.
You're not all she's got.
Yeah, she needs help but what do you think keeps her going?
-What? -You getting out there and living life.
Don't pretend like this is all about your nan.
It's about you.
It's late.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Yeah.
You can't control everything, Regan.
So what's the plan?
You're not even real.
Jonny.
-So you're giving up. -Yeah, I know what you're doing.
I'm not even real remember.
So what does it matter what I say if I tell you you won't always feel like this.
-Jon-jo. -Leave me alone.
I will never feel okay.
That's not true.
Isn't it, dad?
'Cause you're the only person that I can speak to.
And you're not even real. You're just in my fucking head.
-Don't do this Jon-jo. -Why not?
Because you're alive. Because you've got a future. Because you can fight this.
I can't.
You can. This will pass.
You're not real, you're not real.
Jonny.
He's not...
Hey, come here!