1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:01,000
.

2
00:00:30,360 --> 00:00:33,440
These recommendations have been
submitted by some of our residents

3
00:00:33,480 --> 00:00:35,000
and we're going to
give them a try.

4
00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:37,120
So we're cleaning hooses now?

5
00:00:37,160 --> 00:00:40,080
It's mainly elderly people,
who will pay a premium

6
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:44,640
and then you're going to perform
trivial tasks to help them out.

7
00:00:44,680 --> 00:00:47,360
What are these, em... tasks?

8
00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:54,240
Mainly cleaning windows,
emptying bins,

9
00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:55,760
things of that nature.

10
00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:58,640
We've barely got enough time
for our workload as it is.

11
00:00:58,680 --> 00:01:01,160
McShane, if this world
is too difficult for you

12
00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:04,680
why don't you crawl back up inside
your mother?

13
00:01:04,720 --> 00:01:06,160
(JOCK CHUCKLES)

14
00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:07,840
My mum's dead.

15
00:01:07,880 --> 00:01:09,080
No she's no.

16
00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:11,080
Questions. No? Good. OK.

17
00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:15,720
PHONE: "Gross, man... Eugh!"

18
00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:17,480
(BOAB LAUGHS)

19
00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:23,280
What're these new missions
we've to do?

20
00:01:23,320 --> 00:01:26,320
You're gonna be giving
lonely old men rubdowns,

21
00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:27,840
if you know what I mean.

22
00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,200
Is that why you look so happy, aye?

23
00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:31,480
Naw.

24
00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:34,960
Tomorrow I'm away to Las Vegas
on a stag.

25
00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,160
Know what they say,
what happens in Vegas...

26
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:38,440
stays in Vegas?

27
00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:41,920
No McShane son, what happens in Vegas
is great. You tell everybody.

28
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,360
You're thinking of
your maw and da's house.

29
00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:47,520
Cos what happens in your maw and da's
house should stay there.

30
00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:50,040
Like that time
you shagged your sister?

31
00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:51,240
She was my half sister.

32
00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:55,840
It was your maw I shagged....

33
00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:58,440
Morning everyone.

34
00:01:58,480 --> 00:01:59,640
Hi Rhona.

35
00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:00,880
How are you Kaitlin?

36
00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:01,960
Ah, good thanks.

37
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,280
Your smile's contagious.

38
00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:06,080
Don't let any man take that away.

39
00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:09,520
Here are your new missions.

40
00:02:09,560 --> 00:02:12,800
And no skullduggery, we're in enough
trouble with the council already.

41
00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:14,880
Why are you saying that to us?

42
00:02:14,920 --> 00:02:15,920
Well, a man is dead

43
00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:19,000
and thanks to this cleaning company
half of Glasgow reeks of pish.

44
00:02:19,040 --> 00:02:20,080
No biggie though (!)

45
00:02:20,120 --> 00:02:23,400
I meant why are you no saying that
to Kaitlin? She's with us.

46
00:02:23,440 --> 00:02:26,440
When it comes to skullduggery
it's always the men, Robert.

47
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,440
Have a nice day everyone.

48
00:02:28,480 --> 00:02:29,480
Bye Rhona.

49
00:02:29,520 --> 00:02:30,880
Bye Rhona.

50
00:02:30,920 --> 00:02:33,480
RHONA: Oh, Jock?

51
00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:36,040
Your missions.

52
00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:43,320
You OK?

53
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:46,440
Em... Yeah. Yeah. I...I'm fine.

54
00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:49,080
You remind me of my little pinky toe.

55
00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:53,280
Pin...pinky toe?

56
00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:54,760
Cos I just know I'm gonna

57
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:58,160
bang you against every
piece of furniture in my house.

58
00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:09,560
Fag break?

59
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:10,680
Already?

60
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:13,560
What, are you looking
for employee of the month?

61
00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:16,200
You know, I heard smack's
supposed to be easier to quit.

62
00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,320
What're you saying,
I should take up smack?

63
00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:20,560
No, I'm just saying,
if you're trying to quit...

64
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:23,280
What, take smack
to quit smoking fags?

65
00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,120
- Well, when you put it like that...
- It was you put it like that.

66
00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:27,800
I'm just saying, it's what I heard.

67
00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:29,280
God, will you shut up?

68
00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:30,320
'Och, come away in.'

69
00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:32,080
Aye, well the only things

70
00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:34,480
that are needing cleaned really
are the windaes.

71
00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:35,520
(QUIETLY) Mm-hm.

72
00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:37,360
(BIRD SQUAWKS OUTSIDE)

73
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:38,720
Right y'are!

74
00:03:40,520 --> 00:03:42,760
Oh, what's The Day Today saying?

75
00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:47,200
Oh, I couldnae tell you.
I broke my reading glasses.

76
00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:49,160
Which is awfully frustrating

77
00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:52,360
cos I do like to read the paper
wi' a wee cup of tea.

78
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:53,760
Oh...

79
00:03:53,800 --> 00:03:55,040
Listen to this.

80
00:03:55,080 --> 00:03:58,440
It says here the city's population's
gonna double

81
00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:00,520
by the year 2050.

82
00:04:00,560 --> 00:04:01,920
Phew. Do you believe that?

83
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:06,360
Well!

84
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:07,640
What do you think?

85
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,520
I'll need to get a move on.

86
00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:13,840
Thanks for the tea.

87
00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:16,360
Aye, well...

88
00:04:16,400 --> 00:04:18,280
No problem. (CHUCKLES)

89
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:20,760
Oh, and, eh, thanks
for reading me the papers.

90
00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:24,600
All part of the service, Mrs Wallace.
All part of the service.

91
00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:27,600
(BIRDS SQUAWK OUTSIDE)

92
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:33,480
Yous two have got a house call
on this landing.

93
00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:34,640
Joe Hegarty.

94
00:04:34,680 --> 00:04:35,760
Heraghty.

95
00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:39,080
Haggarty. And he's bogging.
And he's a right creep and all.

96
00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:42,360
The other day he asked me if I farted
cos I blew him away.

97
00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:45,160
(CHUCKLES) Blew him away.
Class.

98
00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:47,960
Look, just...
Oh, where have you been?

99
00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:50,400
I'm knackered.
Mrs Wallace's windaes were boggin'.

100
00:04:50,440 --> 00:04:51,440
It took me ages...

101
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,240
Simmer down Craw. Simmer.

102
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:56,120
Look, the sooner you start
the sooner you'll be finished, eh?

103
00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:57,480
(UNDER HER BREATH) Fine.

104
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:05,360
Haggarty.

105
00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:07,720
Hag-garty.

106
00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:18,080
Joe?

107
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,000
How's Kaitlin been
since she moved in wi' you?

108
00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:24,560
Oh, the aroma in the bathroom's
so much nicer...

109
00:05:24,600 --> 00:05:27,480
I meant how has she been?

110
00:05:27,520 --> 00:05:29,560
Since she had to leave
her cheating boyfriend

111
00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:31,680
and move in wi' you
you daft old bastard.

112
00:05:31,720 --> 00:05:33,560
Ho, I'm not that old, Jock.

113
00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:34,600
(SCREAM)

114
00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:40,680
Kaitlin, you alright?

115
00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:43,360
It wasnae me that screamed, ya tit.

116
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:44,400
Ya bastard.

117
00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:45,440
Is he deid?

118
00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:50,480
There's no pulse.

119
00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:51,520
God's sake...

120
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:52,560
Radio it in.

121
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:56,080
Pulse is in the wrist, ya tit.
Look, there.

122
00:05:56,120 --> 00:05:58,200
He's got a winning scratch card
in his hand.

123
00:05:58,240 --> 00:05:59,240
Wha...?

124
00:05:59,280 --> 00:06:00,600
How much for?

125
00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:01,680
A hunner thousand.

126
00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:02,720
Pounds?

127
00:06:02,760 --> 00:06:04,400
No, francs (!) What do you think?

128
00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:07,160
- What's the exchange rate for that?
- The polis are coming.

129
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:12,440
This is officially a crime scene
so naebody touch nothing!

130
00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:16,280
"It's 25 grand each."

131
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:17,640
It's stealing Jock.

132
00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:19,240
Stealing fae who?

133
00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:22,800
I mean, if he had any family there'd
be some photos around here somewhere.

134
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,480
The polis'll be here any minute.

135
00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:30,480
This is oor ticket
oot of cleaning stairs.

136
00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:36,880
I mean, when do people like us
get a chance like this?

137
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:39,440
Eh?

138
00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:43,920
Are we in?

139
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:45,200
Baw deep?

140
00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:47,200
Baw deep.

141
00:06:48,840 --> 00:06:49,840
Baw deep.

142
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:55,600
Baw deep.

143
00:06:58,000 --> 00:06:59,760
They're in there, inspector.

144
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:04,240
# OMINOUS MUSIC

145
00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:13,760
(LIGHTER CLICKS)

146
00:07:13,800 --> 00:07:14,920
(TAKES DRAG)

147
00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:19,800
(EXHALES)

148
00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:25,000
(FRENCH ACCENT)
You lot found the body, yeah?

149
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,400
You, why do you look so dubious?

150
00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:30,640
Uh, cos of the smoke?

151
00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:32,360
Achoo.. I mean (COUGHS)

152
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:33,400
Quiet.

153
00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:39,000
This is a private residence.
Why were you lot in here?

154
00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:40,480
We were working.

155
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:43,200
I thought you were just
a bunch of close cleaners.

156
00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:47,520
No, we offer a support service
to some of our elderly customers.

157
00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:49,400
So you have a work order then.

158
00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:00,960
Did any of you touch the body?

159
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:02,320
Naw.

160
00:08:03,520 --> 00:08:05,960
Didn't check for a pulse?

161
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:07,280
Well yeah, I did.

162
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:09,240
Oh, so you did touch him?

163
00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:10,800
Why're you grilling us?

164
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:14,600
You think this is grilling?

165
00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:18,360
It does seem as if
you're trying to intimidate us.

166
00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:22,720
If I was trying to grill,
intimidate or interrogate,

167
00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:23,760
you would know.

168
00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:27,560
Do you not think it's a bit
disrespectful, smoking in here?

169
00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:29,160
Disrespectful to who?

170
00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,200
The man is dead. Now go.

171
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:35,840
Oh, one more thing.

172
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:38,840
I want the four of you
down at the station at 4pm

173
00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:40,720
for an official statement.

174
00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:43,160
And make sure you bring
that work order.

175
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:45,200
And who do we ask for?

176
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,200
DCI Houle.

177
00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:00,960
Inspector. There's thousands of them.

178
00:09:02,720 --> 00:09:04,640
Ils nous prennent vraiment
pour des cons.

179
00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:07,760
Aye.

180
00:09:08,920 --> 00:09:12,040
- Why've I to collect the winnings?
- Cos you blend in.

181
00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:13,080
Wi' who?

182
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,680
A' the tramps that hang aboot
that bookies.

183
00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:17,400
Oh... But I'm not a good liar.

184
00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:20,080
It's no lying Crawford,
it's a winning ticket.

185
00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,080
Exactly.

186
00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:23,760
Come on.

187
00:09:24,760 --> 00:09:26,200
Baw deep.

188
00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:28,880
Baw deep.

189
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:31,800
Baw deep, Crawford.

190
00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:46,640
What are you doing here?

191
00:09:46,680 --> 00:09:47,680
Eh, em...

192
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:50,480
Placing a bet
on a sporting event.

193
00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:51,760
- Oh.
- Sorry.

194
00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:56,600
Why are you not at work?

195
00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:59,360
Trauma.
We...we got the rest of the day off.

196
00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:03,160
Is that why you look like
you have something to hide?

197
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:05,560
I...I wouldnae know.

198
00:10:08,760 --> 00:10:12,080
What're you doin' here?
Do you happen to have a tip for me?

199
00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:13,600
(THEY LAUGH)

200
00:10:14,560 --> 00:10:16,120
Investigating.

201
00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:20,200
I'm considering the suspicious
circumstances of Mr Heraghty's death.

202
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:22,240
- Haggarty.
- Hegarty.

203
00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:24,800
Suspicious, why's that?

204
00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:26,680
That's confidential at the moment.

205
00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:27,760
Mm.

206
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:29,440
What're you looking at?

207
00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:30,800
Nothing! Nothing.

208
00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:37,120
One more thing.

209
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:40,720
Do you buy scratch cards?

210
00:10:40,760 --> 00:10:43,480
On occasion I have had a punt, yeah.

211
00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:45,560
(WHISPERS) Do you have any
on your person?

212
00:10:45,600 --> 00:10:48,400
No, none, none. Check my pockets.

213
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:49,840
No need for that.

214
00:10:49,880 --> 00:10:52,560
(WHISPERS) I'll see you
at the station, at 4pm.

215
00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:56,960
Cheerie bye!

216
00:10:59,480 --> 00:11:01,320
You threw it in the bin?

217
00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:04,720
Craw, think carefully. Where did
the cleaner take the bin bag?

218
00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:07,200
She put it in her wee trolley,
took it through the back.

219
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:09,400
Oh, she put it in her wee trolley...

220
00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:12,000
Hey hey hey, calm doon.

221
00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:15,560
That must mean there's a skip
roond the back of the bookies.

222
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:24,640
Pull it!

223
00:11:30,240 --> 00:11:32,240
What're you lot up tae?

224
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:37,560
Eh... We're concerned citizens.

225
00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:40,280
I'm sure you're aware
of the toxic waste

226
00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:42,800
that companies are dumping
round about here.

227
00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:45,600
Aye. Toxic waste, aye?
Fae the bookies?

228
00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:49,720
Beat it afore I phone the polis.

229
00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:51,240
Got yous on camera.

230
00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:55,360
Beat it.

231
00:11:57,080 --> 00:12:01,200
I cannae believe you threw 100 grand
in the bin, like it was nothing.

232
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,000
He's the only one at the counter.

233
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:04,320
If we can distract him,

234
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:08,360
get him away from the counter
so he cannae see the CCTV,

235
00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:11,880
we can steal back the bin bags
and then get our ticket.

236
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,000
So who's gonna distract him?

237
00:12:16,840 --> 00:12:18,600
Oh, no. No way.

238
00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:20,120
You are the only one he's no seen.

239
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:22,920
You're the only one
that can...distract him.

240
00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:25,800
Come on, it's 25 grand each, Kaitlin.

241
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:27,400
ALL: Baw deep.

242
00:12:27,440 --> 00:12:28,440
(DOOR OPENS)

243
00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,520
Alright?

244
00:12:46,560 --> 00:12:48,920
Eh...what can I do for you?

245
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:52,720
Oh! What can you do me for?

246
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:56,960
It's a really good question if you...
know what I mean?

247
00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,840
You gonna answer it?

248
00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:02,440
Oh, would you like me to...

249
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:05,080
..answer it?

250
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:07,320
That would be helpful.

251
00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:13,120
I was wondering if you could, em...

252
00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:15,480
..give me the odds for somethin'?

253
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:18,480
And what is that something?

254
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:21,160
What are the odds of you...

255
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:25,200
..slipping in me like a sleeping bag?

256
00:13:26,520 --> 00:13:27,520
What?

257
00:13:27,560 --> 00:13:28,560
'A sleeping bag?!'

258
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,000
Did you want him to
go in you feet first?

259
00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:33,480
You tellt me to flirt.
What was I meant to say?

260
00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:36,320
"How d'you like your sausage
in the morning, smoked or blown?"

261
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:39,160
"You look like a hard worker,
I've got an opening you can fill."

262
00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:41,360
"I don't need a spoonful of sugar
to swallow you."

263
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:43,160
Look, I've only had
the one boyfriend.

264
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:46,960
We were together since school,
unlike the tramps you go with.

265
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,240
What about Jessica?

266
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:50,120
No way.

267
00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:51,160
I'm not doing that.

268
00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:52,360
How no?

269
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:56,200
Because I have standards,
principles and morals.

270
00:13:56,240 --> 00:13:58,400
We'll give you five grand.

271
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,920
So how's it been
living with Crawford?

272
00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:04,280
It's alright.

273
00:14:04,320 --> 00:14:05,880
Last night we'd a couple of drinks

274
00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:07,720
and then we played
a game of film parade.

275
00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:08,760
Film parade?

276
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:09,880
Aye, it's like charades

277
00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:12,840
only you dress up like a character
from a film and act out a scene.

278
00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:16,920
You come to my house
on the day of my daughter's wedding

279
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:19,120
and you don't show no respect.

280
00:14:19,160 --> 00:14:21,200
Here's Johnny!

281
00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:23,960
Welcome to the party pal!

282
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:25,400
Robo-polis!

283
00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:27,120
(IMITATES MACHINE GUN)

284
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:29,000
Sounds like a laugh.

285
00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:30,040
Aye, it was at first.

286
00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:32,640
And then things steered
in a disturbing direction.

287
00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:36,280
Oh! Hi sweetie!

288
00:14:36,320 --> 00:14:37,520
(MAKES KISSING SOUND)

289
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:43,480
That's nothing compared to what
happened at breakfast this morning.

290
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,280
He microwaves his pants?!

291
00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:57,960
Says microwaving them
keeps it toasty on a cold morning.

292
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,000
(BELL)

293
00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:00,600
(CHUCKLES)

294
00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:02,320
(GAGS)

295
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:05,160
And his bawsack
looks like a goblin's purse.

296
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:07,840
Mornin'.

297
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:14,360
It's ruined walnut whips for me, man.

298
00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:16,480
The beaver's...

299
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:17,720
- (HORN BEEPS)
- (SCREAMS)

300
00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:19,960
Alright there?

301
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:21,280
Oh, yous are a bit edgy.

302
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:22,840
God dammit Crawford!

303
00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,000
What's wrong with you?

304
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:25,440
Jessica's in position.

305
00:15:25,480 --> 00:15:27,680
Aye, she said it was
absolutely massive.

306
00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,400
Aye, you'd have been so proud.

307
00:15:31,800 --> 00:15:34,160
I need to call you back Gran, right?
Love you.

308
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,000
Hiya.

309
00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:42,160
Ah, my grandad's not feeling well

310
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:44,960
and he asked me to
put a bet on for him.

311
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,160
Aye sweetie. Eh...

312
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:51,760
I had written down the horses
he wanted but I've lost it.

313
00:15:51,800 --> 00:15:53,600
Do you know what race it's at?

314
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:54,640
North...

315
00:15:54,680 --> 00:15:56,640
Och, North...

316
00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:58,360
Hampton?

317
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:01,880
Northampton, yes!
If I saw it I would know it.

318
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,320
Can you help me?

319
00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:07,360
# JAZZ FUNK

320
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:09,320
Let me just get the sheets.

321
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:39,360
So what do you do, Jessica?

322
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,120
Mm, trying to figure that out.

323
00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:44,680
I recently moved here
for a fresh start.

324
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:47,520
Ah right. That's...inspiring.

325
00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:53,320
I think I know what you mean,
like taking control your own life,

326
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:55,640
not answering to others.

327
00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:58,160
I'm only in here
till my music career takes off.

328
00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:00,560
You couldnae hold your water,
never mind a tune

329
00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:01,640
you soppy wee shite.

330
00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:04,000
Now get behind the counter
and put this on for me.

331
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:07,200
Could yous go any slower?

332
00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:08,240
Put it in!

333
00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:13,160
How long have we got left?!

334
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,640
Don't know. I was just saying that
for intensity.

335
00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:27,000
Find out what you were looking for?

336
00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:28,040
And then some.

337
00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:31,640
Good luck.

338
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:34,080
Eh, Logan! Logan!

339
00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:38,320
I was wondering,
what kind of music do you make?

340
00:17:38,360 --> 00:17:43,960
The only kind I'm qualified in.
L-O-V-E.

341
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:45,000
Here, Tina Turnaff,

342
00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:47,520
cash this afore one of us is sick.

343
00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:50,120
Hurry up!

344
00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:58,120
So...

345
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:01,040
Now you know how to place a bet,
you think you'll be back?

346
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:04,240
Is that your way
of asking to see me again?

347
00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:07,360
I guess it is, aye.

348
00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:09,840
I just got out of a relationship,

349
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:14,400
but if this bet comes through
I'll take it to be a sign.

350
00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:17,280
Could write a song about it.

351
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:19,640
Em, I could eat a tin
of alphabetti spaghetti

352
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:21,680
and shite oot better lyrics than him.

353
00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:26,320
Bye.

354
00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:33,920
This is why folk call you
Mick the dick, Da.

355
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:35,840
Fiver each way ya wee fanny.

356
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:40,560
We need a simple
but effective process.

357
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,680
Rip the bags open on the couch,

358
00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:46,040
any scratch cards
we'll put on the table

359
00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:49,320
and then gather up the rubbish
and put them in bin bags.

360
00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:51,480
I've no got any bin bags.

361
00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:52,800
What? How no?

362
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:55,960
Kaitlin used the last one doing...
what was it again?

363
00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,360
(HOARSE BREATHING)

364
00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:04,160
I was a dementor fae
The Prisoner Of Azkaban.

365
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,760
You're demented if you think
that was a good film parade.

366
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:09,560
If I'm demented it's because of
the last film parade you did.

367
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,440
# SOFT PIANO

368
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,720
It's American Beauty!

369
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:22,600
If I'd had real rose petals,
I'd have used them!

370
00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:24,840
It wouldnae have made it
any less disturbing!

371
00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:26,160
Would yous two just stop?

372
00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,920
Jessica, just leave
the rubbish on the couch,

373
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:30,840
the scratch cards on the table,

374
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:33,520
and I'll bring bin bags back wi' me.

375
00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:36,200
I'm not raiding through these bins.

376
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:39,960
It's only fair that we cut her in
evenly, and if it wasnae for Jessica

377
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,160
we wouldnae have got it back.

378
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:46,280
I mean,
it's only an extra 15 grand (!)

379
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:48,400
To you.

380
00:19:48,440 --> 00:19:49,840
Fine.

381
00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:51,360
Let's go.

382
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:53,360
Oh, and Crawford?

383
00:19:55,160 --> 00:19:57,560
I'm telling Legend
you've been stealing ketchup.

384
00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:58,920
Aw, don't!

385
00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:03,400
We're here to see DCI Hole.

386
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:09,200
Well, if it isn't the eager beavers.

387
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,280
That's your work order.

388
00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:14,720
So we can make these statements
and get up the road.

389
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,920
What's the rush?

390
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:22,680
# TENSE MUSIC

391
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:33,480
(GROANS)

392
00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:37,400
'What is it you want, officer?'

393
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:39,640
Inspector Hole.

394
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:41,680
(CHUCKLES) Don't mind if I do.

395
00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:43,240
Heule!

396
00:20:44,480 --> 00:20:46,280
Were you friends with Mr Heraghty?

397
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:47,840
- Hegarty.
- Haggarty!

398
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:49,640
- Heraghty.
- Haggarty?

399
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:51,480
No.

400
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:53,680
So his death didn't affect you?

401
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:55,280
Aye, course it did.

402
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:57,600
I mean he smelled the same
in death as he did in life.

403
00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:01,920
BOAB: 'There he was. All deid.'

404
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:03,720
So he was dead
when you found him?

405
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:04,760
Oh, aye.

406
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:08,000
I just went straight to the kitchen,
rifled through the cupboards

407
00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:10,040
and grabbed myself
a couple of biscuits,

408
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:12,320
as you do in a situation like that.

409
00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:14,520
What kind of biscuit?

410
00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:15,880
It was a custard creme.

411
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:17,480
Oh! Oh!

412
00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:19,880
CRAWFORD: 'One thing I did notice
about the body.'

413
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,480
For whatever reason
it stuck in my head.

414
00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,120
He'd on a cracking pair
of walking socks.

415
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:32,120
Eugh!

416
00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:35,960
T'as un clope?

417
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:40,320
You can't smoke in here...
because of the smoke alarm.

418
00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:42,040
Merci beaucoup.

419
00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:45,680
Cup of tea. Yeah.

420
00:21:45,720 --> 00:21:47,480
HEULE: 'You're sweating.'

421
00:21:47,520 --> 00:21:49,200
Do you know what that tells me?

422
00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:53,360
That I've got
a healthy immune system?

423
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:54,640
Carrying a burden.

424
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,600
'Kaitlin,
why are you doing this job?'

425
00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:07,640
What?

426
00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:09,840
Why? It's disgusting.

427
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:10,880
I know.

428
00:22:10,920 --> 00:22:13,160
You ever thought about
joining the pigs?

429
00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:19,720
'Secrets can be a heavy thing.'

430
00:22:19,760 --> 00:22:20,960
They certainly can.

431
00:22:22,360 --> 00:22:24,200
Now tell me what it is.

432
00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:27,400
One.

433
00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:29,440
I promise you will feel much better.

434
00:22:29,480 --> 00:22:30,480
Much much better.

435
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:32,600
Two.

436
00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:34,240
Much, much, much...

437
00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:36,200
That's enough.

438
00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:38,520
Three.

439
00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:40,560
I've got...

440
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:43,560
..non-motile sperm.

441
00:22:44,960 --> 00:22:45,960
Agh!

442
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,400
Stupid...! (GROANS)

443
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:53,760
Unless I'm under arrest or you've got
any charges I'd like to go.

444
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:55,160
I mean, I'm still hungry.

445
00:22:59,960 --> 00:23:01,640
Get in there with the rest of them.

446
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:02,680
(CHILDREN CRY)

447
00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:04,440
He must know something.

448
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:06,520
After Jock we're home free.

449
00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:07,560
(DOOR OPENS)

450
00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:12,600
Was all of that really necessary?

451
00:23:13,640 --> 00:23:14,640
No.

452
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:15,760
You're free to go.

453
00:23:17,320 --> 00:23:18,920
Inspector Hule.

454
00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:19,960
Heule.

455
00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:23,280
This man would like to speak to you
regarding Joe Heraghty's death.

456
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:24,960
ALL: Haggarty.

457
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:27,360
Did he have a winning scratch card
when he was found?

458
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:28,400
Why?

459
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:31,080
He was always buying
they stupid scratch cards.

460
00:23:31,120 --> 00:23:34,320
I had a fake winning ticket made
and switched it in the boozer.

461
00:23:34,360 --> 00:23:37,240
There was no such scratch card..

462
00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:38,880
Thank God.

463
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:40,960
You got him a fake winning
scratch card?

464
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:44,520
I thought I'd caused him to have
a heart attack. It was only a joke!

465
00:23:44,560 --> 00:23:46,400
ALL: Bastard!

466
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:49,320
'Fake!'

467
00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:52,920
This ticket is fake!

468
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:56,040
Look.

469
00:23:56,080 --> 00:23:59,880
(SLURS) We stood by each other.
We risked a lot.

470
00:23:59,920 --> 00:24:03,160
And we did it together,
for each other.

471
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:06,720
And that is the definition
of real friendship, eh?

472
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:08,520
Mm. Mm, mm.

473
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:11,960
That literally means nothing to me.

474
00:24:12,000 --> 00:24:14,400
Legend, whisky.

475
00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:17,920
Lunch break is over.
Three hours ago.

476
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:19,520
Rrgh!

477
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:23,440
Can't believe I seduced some
innocent guy, raided through bins,

478
00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:27,880
threw away my morals, my dignity,
just for money.

479
00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:29,720
You never actually got any money.

480
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,040
Bookies guy was cute though.

481
00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:37,320
Just don't ask him to slip in you
like a sleeping bag.

482
00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:39,080
You're such a dick.

483
00:24:39,120 --> 00:24:40,400
What's this?

484
00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:43,720
Invoice. For the tomato sauce sachets
you've been stealing.

485
00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:45,920
I hope you've learned your lesson
Crawford.

486
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:51,600
Living the life of a criminal
will always ketchup wi' you.

487
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:54,600
Ketchup...

488
00:24:56,600 --> 00:24:57,600
Never mind.

489
00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:17,200
What're you watching?

490
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:20,120
The music channel.

491
00:25:20,160 --> 00:25:22,160
That'd be better if you
turned it up...

492
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:23,440
No, don't!

493
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:26,520
That no the wee guy that
used to work in the bookies'?

494
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:32,560
Logan Rossi, YouTube sensation
turned international music superstar.

495
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:34,000
Overnight.

496
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:37,200
He asked you out, didn't he?

497
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:39,080
Imagine if you'd said aye.

498
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:44,040
You could be there with him now,
touring Europe.

499
00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:47,560
But instead, you're here wi' me.

500
00:25:47,600 --> 00:25:52,240
Oh well, never mind. Plenty more fish
in the sea, pebbles on the beach.

501
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:53,400
Cookies in the...

502
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:54,440
Thanks, legend (!)

503
00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:57,240
Now while you're here,
that reminds me,

504
00:25:57,280 --> 00:25:58,640
you're workin' Saturday,

505
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:01,640
cos my wife has got me tickets
to go and see that wee prick.

506
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:18,960
.