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00:00:01,668 --> 00:00:02,961
[Beta] Chaos bots
have been sent from the future
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00:00:02,961 --> 00:00:04,963
to stop the one person
who can save the world.
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00:00:04,963 --> 00:00:06,715
Me?
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00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:09,676
[singers] ♪ Hey, hey
Hailey's on it ♪
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00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:11,845
[Hailey] ♪ Teach a cat
To play the piano ♪
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00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:14,473
♪ Roller-skate
All the way to Orlando ♪
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00:00:14,473 --> 00:00:17,392
♪ Use my earwax
To make a candle ♪
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00:00:17,392 --> 00:00:19,895
[singers] ♪ Hey, hey
Hailey's on it ♪
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00:00:19,895 --> 00:00:22,105
[Hailey] ♪ Win first place
For world's cutest pet rock ♪
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00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:24,775
♪ Do a corn maze
Hope I don't get lost ♪
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00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:25,776
♪ Eat an onion ♪
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Kiss my friend Scott?
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Huh? Aah!
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00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:29,863
- [boings]
- [Scott] Trampoline!
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[singers] ♪ Hey, hey
Hailey's on it ♪
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[jaunty piano theme playing]
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00:00:36,495 --> 00:00:38,580
[Scott] As far back
as I can remember,
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I've wanted to be a sandwich.
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To have a sandwich
named after you,
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and become a sandwich legend,
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is a whole other level
of excellence.
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Chicken Sal.
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Toasted chicken salad sandwich
with lettuce and tomato.
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BL-Tianna.
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Prefers her bacon fatty,
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but keeps her stories lean.
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Lil' Meatball.
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No Tomato Tammy, Reuben,
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these people were somebodies
in a town of nobodies.
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You see, the owner of
Deli Rubs, Giuseppe,
has a rule.
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You order 1,000 sandwiches
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and you get
a sandwich named after you.
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[all gasp]
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That day, when we saw
Peanut Butter Pam
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get immortalized
on that menu...
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[cheering and applause]
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I knew, some way,
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some how, I had to get
a sandwich named after me.
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I still have her pickle.
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- Ugh!
- Wow, thrilled you've got
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such a connection
to this, Scott, but how did
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"Have a sandwich named after me"
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end up on Hailey's list?
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Oh, I was there too, remember?
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And I thought
it sounded kinda... neat.
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Sounds... neat.
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Like I said... neat.
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Okay, well how close are you
to hitting 1,000 sandwiches?
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Only 999 sandwiches to go.
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[sighs]
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Those sandwiches
are so mediocre.
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I mean, who'd eat that many?
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I've eaten 997 already!
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Life's got no meaning
if I'm not a sandwich.
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And I already have
the perfect name picked out.
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The Scott Denogie
Pastrami Hoagie.
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- Did you have that laminated?
- Yep.
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And not to pull a Scott here,
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but your name
is Scott Denoga, not--
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Yeah, yeah, but this
is for a rhyme, so it's okay.
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It's very important to me
that it rhymes.
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Uh, okay?
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[Beta]
Kind of a mouthful.
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Yeah, a mouthful
of delicious sandwich!
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Now let's go get you
one sandwich closer
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to 1,000, Hailey!
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Sure. Sounds... neat.
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That's the spirit! Kind of.
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Hey! What are you guys
eating over there?
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A salad?
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[all] Scotty!
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Scotty?
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What's shaking, Scotty?
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My belly
from all these sandwiches!
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[laughter]
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- Hailey, this is
Peanut Butter Pam.
- [Pam] Mm-hmm.
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- BL-Tianna, Chicken Sal.
- [Sal] Mm-hmm.
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- No Tomato Tammy.
- [Tammy] Uh-huh.
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- Lil' Meatball and... Reuben.
- [Reuben chuckles]
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Oh, Reuben!
I'm also just... Hailey.
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00:03:06,812 --> 00:03:08,647
No, no,
you're saying it wrong.
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You've gotta say it
like the sandwich.
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00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:14,319
You mean, like, Reuben?
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How's that shoulder
holding up, Scotty?
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Shoulder? What's wrong with
your shoulder, Scott... y?
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Oh, Scotty's been on the mend
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for months
from a fist-pumping injury.
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[all chanting]
Meatball! Meatball!
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Meatball! Meatball!
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Meatba-- ah!
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[groaning]
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He was having
a really great time!
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Right up until he wasn't.
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Peanut Butter Pam
says I'm the next generation
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of sandwich legend!
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Only three sandwiches left
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'til I'm on the menu
with you guys!
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[all groaning]
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00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:45,767
Oh, and Hailey's
gonna get up there too.
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00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:48,270
Yeah, Scotty, about that.
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00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:49,938
There's something
we should tell you.
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- Howdy!
- [Scott shrieks]
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Bill Board?
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Oh, boy. Don't tell me.
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You won this deli
in a high stakes game of pool?
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Oh, you're way off,
Little Missy.
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00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:02,784
I won this here place
in a high stakes game of Horse.
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00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,286
I got a mean hook shot.
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00:04:04,286 --> 00:04:05,829
Wait, you'll still honor
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Giuseppe's
1,000 sandwich rule, right?
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00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,000
- Who?
- Giuseppe?
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This deli's founder?
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Oh, is that how
you pronounce it?
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I been calling him Geeyoosep.
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I will honor Geeyoosep's rule, though.
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- [relieved sigh]
- His rule
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that I can do whatever I want
as the new owner.
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- Yee-haw!
- [Scott shrieks]
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I'm still gonna
name my sandwiches
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after people, though.
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My step-daughter, Vision Board,
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showed me videos
on the interwebs
that get millions of views.
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So we're gonna hold
a promotional contest
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to make our own virus video.
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Yes! I mean...
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so sorry about
the punch card, Scott.
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- But also, what's the contest?
- A test of endurance!
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We'll put everyone up
on our famous sub sign,
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00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:49,623
and the three folks
that last the longest up there
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00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,875
will get a sandwich
named after them.
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That sounds... way better
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than eating 1,000
questionable sandwiches!
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- I'm in!
- [Scott groans]
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I'm so sorry, son.
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I should've thrown those
away for you.
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Yee-haw!
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All those sandwiches
for nothing.
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All that time wasted!
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Nearly $10,000.
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00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:15,941
Don't worry, Scott, you're gonna
be one of the top three.
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We both are! We can become
sandwich legends together.
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Hey, Scott and Hailey
for the win, okay?
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00:05:22,781 --> 00:05:24,950
Scott and Hailey for the win.
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- All right, let's do this!
- [shoulder cracks]
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00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:29,371
- [groans]
- Hey, hey, remember
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00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:31,248
what your physical
therapist said, Scotty.
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00:05:31,248 --> 00:05:33,500
There are other ways
to celebrate.
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00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:36,294
Since when are you
seeing a physical therapist?
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00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:39,047
[Bill] Now you can exit
the contest at any time
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00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:42,842
by simply falling off the sign
into the ginormous mustard pool.
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Which also lowers the chances
that I'll get sued, yee-haw!
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I'm starting to think
Bill Board gets sued a lot.
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All right, interwebbers,
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00:05:49,558 --> 00:05:51,810
let the excitement begin. Yah!
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- [man clears throat]
- [woman shrieks]
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Enough of the mind games!
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[splash]
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You may be on a hot streak,
Hailey Banks,
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00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:06,366
but this competition
is the start
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00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:09,703
to my epic comeback,
of beating you in all things.
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00:06:09,703 --> 00:06:11,746
- [wind howls]
- Hey, whoa, whoa,
what the beans!
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00:06:12,956 --> 00:06:15,417
Don't worry,
I have a digital backup.
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00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:18,253
But your back, the literal one,
not the digital one,
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is up against the wall!
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The proverbial one,
not an actual one.
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What are you even talking about?
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[laughs] I'm going
to outlast both of you.
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I installed a personal toilet
in my pants.
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00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:31,683
- [chuckles]
- [toilet flushes]
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00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:36,313
How does it even... whatever.
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00:06:36,313 --> 00:06:38,607
Scott and I
are getting those sandwiches.
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Yeah, and mine's gonna rhyme!
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00:06:41,818 --> 00:06:44,237
Okay, I feel like you're really
fixating on the rhyme thing.
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00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:45,780
Well. this is less exciting
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00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:48,366
than a sloth
washing a clean pot.
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We've only got--
[gasps] 23 viewers?
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00:06:51,536 --> 00:06:53,705
Let's shake things up, y'all!
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00:06:53,705 --> 00:06:55,749
All contestants
must now wear blindfolds
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00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,459
- for the next hour.
- [men scream]
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00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,961
[splashing]
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Anybody who jumps off the sign
right now gets this briefcase
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00:07:03,173 --> 00:07:05,175
full of warm fish sandwiches.
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00:07:05,175 --> 00:07:07,135
- Why are they in a briefcase?
- Ooh, me!
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00:07:08,136 --> 00:07:09,179
[splash]
185
00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:13,224
So warm, and fishy!
186
00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:15,143
Teachers are weird.
187
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:17,520
[Bill] Now y'all been
up there a long time,
188
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,314
so if anybody needs to use
189
00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:21,941
the Potty-tron 5,000
down below...
190
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:24,903
- Nah, I'm good.
- [toilet flushes]
191
00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:26,571
[groaning]
192
00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:30,408
[panting]
193
00:07:30,408 --> 00:07:31,493
[relieved sigh]
194
00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,956
[shrieks, splashes]
195
00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:38,375
- [contestants screaming]
- [Bill] I wouldn't relish
196
00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:39,626
being you right now, folks.
197
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:42,337
My condiments to the chef. Heh!
198
00:07:42,337 --> 00:07:44,255
We like to have fun around here.
199
00:07:44,255 --> 00:07:45,590
[shrieks]
200
00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:46,675
Oh!
201
00:07:48,927 --> 00:07:51,096
I think he's out of balloons.
We made it!
202
00:07:51,096 --> 00:07:53,139
Wow, even you, Lucy,
you're normally kind of--
203
00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:54,599
[Lucy sneezes]
204
00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:55,767
- [splash]
- ...unlucky.
205
00:07:55,767 --> 00:07:57,769
All right, e-folks!
206
00:07:57,769 --> 00:08:00,689
We're up to... 64 viewers!
207
00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:02,315
So let's ignore
my lawyers again
208
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:03,817
and get even crazier.
209
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,777
The final test of endurance,
210
00:08:05,777 --> 00:08:08,238
if any of our contestants
drop their hand,
211
00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:09,781
it will trigger their plank
and cause them
212
00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:12,242
to drop
right outta the competition.
213
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:14,160
What, you mean like this?
214
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,413
[shrieks, splashes]
215
00:08:16,413 --> 00:08:18,248
Question answered, thank you.
216
00:08:18,248 --> 00:08:21,501
Wait, we're the final three.
We did it!
217
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,753
We're all getting
sandwiches named after us!
218
00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:27,006
All right! Technically a tie,
but really a win,
219
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:29,217
because I've always said
tie goes to the handsomest.
220
00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:31,136
Which is me, obviously.
221
00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:32,971
Whoo-hoo!
Y'all are tougher
222
00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:35,014
than a boiled boot,
223
00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:38,643
and it looks like
we've got a whopping
99 viewers now!
224
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:40,478
So I'm gonna pull
a little switcheroo
225
00:08:40,478 --> 00:08:42,355
and keep this contest going.
226
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:45,233
Hashtag, yee-haw!
227
00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:47,736
Keep it going?
What the beans!
228
00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:49,195
That's right!
From here on out,
229
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,114
there's only gonna be
one winner!
230
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,450
Hear that, internetters?
Only one person
231
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:55,160
is getting a sandwich
named after them.
232
00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,454
Drama, et cetera. Yee-haw!
233
00:08:57,454 --> 00:09:00,915
That's unfair!
And very inconvenient!
234
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:02,333
[shoulder creaking]
235
00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:04,794
[all chanting]
Scotty! Scotty!
236
00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:08,173
You got this! You deserve
that sandwich, buddy!
237
00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:11,342
Bill Board,
you got a problem on your hands.
238
00:09:11,342 --> 00:09:14,095
And that problem's called
Scott and Hailey for the win!
239
00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:15,847
We started
this competition together,
240
00:09:15,847 --> 00:09:18,224
and by dog, no matter what,
241
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:19,809
- we're gonna--
- Psst, A.C.
242
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:21,352
Team up with me
and we can knock Scott out.
243
00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:23,271
- Wait, what?
- Yeah, what?
244
00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:26,816
Scott, I'm sorry, but you know
I need this win for my list.
245
00:09:26,816 --> 00:09:28,568
I'm sure there's
another deli somewhere
246
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:30,695
where you can somehow get
a sandwich named after you.
247
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:33,323
Dang, Hailey, that is cold!
248
00:09:33,323 --> 00:09:35,533
[sniffs] I am so proud of you.
249
00:09:35,533 --> 00:09:38,995
But... it's...
Hailey, don't do this!
250
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:41,372
A.C., Scott's got
a secret ticklish spot.
251
00:09:41,372 --> 00:09:43,792
Make an alliance with me
and I'll tell you where it is.
252
00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:45,335
That'll trigger his plank,
and we can battle it out
253
00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:46,836
mano a mano.
254
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:50,548
Hailey! You... you traitor!
255
00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:52,592
You're like
Eggs Benedict Arnold.
256
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,302
We don't talk about him
any more!
257
00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:58,139
So, you're proposing
an alliance, yes?
258
00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:00,517
[sharp exhale] Yes.
259
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:01,434
Shake on it?
260
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:06,231
What, no, wait,
what the beans!
261
00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:15,782
- Ah!
- [sobbing]
262
00:10:17,659 --> 00:10:19,285
[Scott] Thanks for
letting me win, Hailey.
263
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:20,995
Yeah, well,
when the sandwich legends
264
00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:23,039
started chanting your name,
it was pretty obvious
265
00:10:23,039 --> 00:10:24,040
how much it meant to you.
266
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,208
And I didn't wanna end up
267
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:26,334
like Eggs Benedict Arnold.
268
00:10:26,334 --> 00:10:28,795
I regret nothing!
269
00:10:28,795 --> 00:10:31,256
Well, Beta, you'd better get
to work finding another place
270
00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:32,924
where I can get a sandwich
named after me.
271
00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:34,592
Hold on now.
272
00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:36,678
Scott and Hailey for the win, right?
273
00:10:36,678 --> 00:10:38,263
- [background cheering]
- [watch bleeps]
274
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:40,098
Huh?
275
00:10:40,098 --> 00:10:42,308
Order up,
here's the first official
276
00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:45,603
Scott and Hailey
Pastrami and Bay Leaf sub.
277
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:48,022
What?
Scott, what about your sandwich?
278
00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:50,024
And your perfect name?
279
00:10:50,024 --> 00:10:52,485
I think the only thing cooler
than being a sandwich legend
280
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:55,822
is being a sandwich legend
with my best friend.
281
00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:58,491
And most importantly,
the name still rhymes!
282
00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,327
The Scott and Hailey
Pastrami and Bay Leaf sub.
283
00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:03,788
I mean... not really.
284
00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:07,417
Yeah, it does!
Hailey, bay leaf,
285
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:10,044
it's a slant rhyme, kinda.
286
00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:13,214
It's kind of a slant rhyme--
Oh, my duck, it doesn't rhyme!
287
00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:15,383
Hey, hey, it's okay.
288
00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:18,011
What matters is that we're
sandwich legends thanks to you.
289
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:19,762
And, we've got a delicious
sandwich to prove it.
290
00:11:22,849 --> 00:11:24,851
- [Scott] What have I done?
- There are so many bay leaves!
291
00:11:24,851 --> 00:11:26,019
It doesn't rhyme at all!