- That's right, Don Drippy.
I'll see you in one hour
for the renegotiation of your contract.
And that is what happened
in the phone call I had 30 minutes ago with Don Drippy.
- That was a very good re-creation.
- It's crazy that my dad gave his buddy's
experimental fast-melting ice cream franchise
exclusive rights to operate in New Utopia.
- I love Drippy Drips. It's fun because it melts.
You have to eat it fast,
otherwise you get milky fingers.
Sometimes I eat it slow on purpose.
It's licky-licky-licky good!
- Are you saying slogans, or are those your opinions?
- I don't know. - This has to change.
It's hot out. I want ice cream.
And there's only one kind
because of this binding contract
signed in barbecue sauce.
- Wait. There's other kinds of iced cream?
- Okay, weird way to say that but, yes, Wife Joslyn.
Every self-respecting town
needs at least four competing ice cream options--
two hard, one soft,
and one that serves creepy savory flavors no one likes
but that make you feel smart. - Ha!
Limiting choice was one of your father's mechanisms of control.
Don't you know anything? - Oh, shut up, Bandit.
I have a big day doing good things for the cult.
- And I'm doing good things
for the town that the cult does its dirty dealings in.
I'm running for mayor!
- Isn't that more of a ceremonial position?
- We love you, Mayor Pancakes!
- He's a dog!
- Every self-respecting town needs a real mayor.
And when I win... - [gasps]
- You'll be in serious trouble.
Vote for Bandit.
I'm not a dog.
- That was hot.
- I mean, sort of.
[knock at door] - Valve, turn it?
You want me to turn?
- People need to enter with more context.
- Name's Dearl.
I release built-up gas from swamps.
I've been doing it for years.
I live by my own terms. Can't complain.
Your swamp out back-- it's due.
- Yeah, sure, go for it.
- The gas builds up otherwise,
gets real dangerous if you don't have a tolerance.
I have a tolerance.
- Take yes for an answer.
I'm sorry. I have ice cream all over me.
- I work in swamps.
I'm not impressed by a little ice cream.
Mmm.
- Ugh!
I have had enough of hot men getting in my way today.
- Can I have permission to have heard what he said?
- Yeah. Why? - He's releasing the swamp gas!
Whoo-hoo! - Huh?
[all cheering]
Oh, no, tambourines.
[cheering continues]
- Swamp day. [laughs]
[wild laughter]
- The gas makes everyone go insane.
It's kind of why I asked.
Good luck getting anything done today.
- [groans]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
[crowd cheering]
♪ ♪
[goat bleats]
[person screams]
- [laughing]
- Mae Mae, I need you to help me
put the gas back in the swamp.
I have to focus on girl-boss business business.
- Oh, honey, you can't shove a crazy baby back in its mama.
That thing's alive.
- Okay, can someone explain this to me?
- I can explain it.
Elder Amos, entering with context.
I was your father's personal scientist.
You can trust me. I discovered that copper kills sperm.
Don't ask how. - [sighs]
- Your father founded New Utopia on a swamp,
which is Latin for "sloppy land."
And this sloppy land gives off something we call gas,
but the ancients called "swamp farts."
Let me know if I should slow down.
You see, once a year, our leader authorizes
the safe release of this gas pressure
into our town's atmosphere.
Now, how long does this gas last?
This gas lasts roughly 12 Earth hours.
- [gasps]
- It is a psychoactive chemical
that unleashes a highly anticipated,
consequence-free day of debauchery--
sort of like "The Purge," only freakier.
The gas shows people their true selves.
And most people's true selves
are hornier than they'd like to admit.
But it can also cause "crazification"
of the following brain areas--
the personality lobe, the inhibitions lobe,
the hallucination lobe, and, of course, the brain penis.
Hmm. - [giggles]
Swamp prank. - [gasps]
- [laughs]
- And the prank lobe.
[mellow music]
- Man, swamp day came late this year.
- [sighs] We sealed this place up right in time.
I don't mind sloppy drunks,
but sloppy gas drunks think nothing counts.
[all cheering]
I hate that banner.
- Mm, I felt good about that pee.
Why is the door a wall now?
- It's surprise gas day, and I'm sitting it out.
- But if we're all sealed up, we're gonna miss all the fun.
- Well, too bad.
We're gonna hunker down together and have a normal day.
Swamp gas is not my drug, okay? Not for me.
Natural highs freak me out.
- [gasps]
- Oops.
- Big Judy, how could you?
This is going to be the worst--
Oh. - Atta girl.
Buckle up, kids! We're on the G Train now.
[person laughing]
- [gasps]
[goat bleats] - [chuckling goofily]
[people moaning]
- Snake! I knew you were low,
but to release swamp gas on Election Day?
You did this to sabotage me! - Why would I do that?
I have my own lean-in pantsuit stuff to do today.
- Swamp prank. [laughing]
- If you were so good on policy,
you'd know that if I didn't release the gas,
this town would explode.
Is that what you want as mayor?
An exploded town? [all gasp]
- You know I don't want that!
What I want is a fair race. - [laughs]
The mayor is licking me.
- If your campaign can't handle a little gas,
that's on you.
- Oh, I can handle it.
[smooth funk music]
Mmm.
- ♪ I take offense you're on the fence ♪
♪ My self-defense-- ♪
- Ooh. - Aah.
So can I.
Just have to keep it together for the deal.
Keeping it "profesh" while volcanically horny
is one of the special skills on my résumé,
right next to conversational Mandarin.
No one checks.
- And I just have to keep it together
to out-campaign a golden retriever.
Making dogs look bad is also one of my special skills.
Vote for Bandit for horny!
Mayor, mayor! Horny mayor!
Good God, I got to get out of here.
- [chuckling]
- Whoo-hoo!
- [gasps]
[both gasp] - Aah!
- Oh, this is not good.
Not good.
Okay, Petey, focus on yourself.
You can do this as long as nobody hot comes around.
And how hot could some ice cream man be?
[car horn honks] [gasps]
Oh, no.
Silver fox. [breathes deeply]
Let's go, girl. Come on.
Mr. Petey, I'm Drippy.
Sorry, I'm dripping.
Sorry. Hi. I'm hot old man.
One more time--Hi. I would like to suck your old [bleep].
My bad. Hi, there. I'm Petey. Soon we [bleep].
Ah! One more time.
Hello, sex dad.
No. Hi.
Hi, Don. Oh, there it is. Ha!
We have a lot of business to discuss.
- Well, we should probably get comfortable, then.
I am going to pop a button.
- [screams quietly]
[people cheering]
- Ooh!
- Thanks for, uh, making the trip, Mr. Drippy.
- Wonderful to meet you.
Your father was a dear friend, and you look just like him--
well, with some key differences.
- [chuckles] I have a feeling we can get this settled
in three minutes or less.
Here's a new contract.
Could you sign it in a not-hot way, please?
Thank you. - Whoa, now.
Buy a girl a drink first.
Your dad and I never got into the specifics.
We'd go out on the town,
and we'd let Mae Mae handle all that.
But I like your moxie.
- Um, which part of me is my moxie?
[chuckles] I'm sorry.
- I apologize as well.
- [clears throat]
This contract may have worked for my dad,
but it does not work for me.
It makes no sense. - I know, right?
Best deal I ever made.
- Well, your sweet, milky gravy train
is coming to a screeching halt.
- Oh, asking me to sign
before we've even had a little country fun.
Well, if this is a negotiation,
I'm going to need something in return.
- [gasps]
- [chuckles]
- Mm. [gasps]
Can we get a cleanup?
Oh, Wife Beth? I didn't know you worked here.
- That's because you never ask about me.
The gas makes me full of rage.
- Oh.
Pardon me, Mr. Drippy.
We both need to cool down. We'll be right back.
- [grunting] - Aah!
- Now, that's not as cold as a regular freezer.
That's 37 degrees. That's just right on the edge.
- Give him something in return?
Ugh, this guy's really trying to sleep with me here.
I'm trying to screw him over, not screw him.
- He's not horny for you.
He thinks you're an exceptional young woman.
- Like, he's just proud of me?
- [mockingly] Everyone's proud of Petey.
- Oh, my God, he has a daughter crush.
- Oh, look, Petey's catching on.
- That magical dynamic
where an older guy sees himself in you
and he's blind to all your obvious flaws.
It's happened to me a lot, actually.
- Sounds like you have multiple father figures in your life,
and I have none!
- Me and Daddy Drippy banging it out--it's off the table!
A daughter crush is not sexual. It can be a little bittersweet.
- I'm the one who brought this up to you.
Why do you keep explaining it to me?
- He'll be the George Shultz to my Elizabeth Holmes.
The stronger his daughter crush gets,
the more he loses all sense of what a good investment is
and the more he'll do whatever I want.
And that's business.
One thing is certain--
there will be other ice cream choices
in this town.
- Oh, great! Put me out of a job!
[laughter]
- Focus up!
A vote for Bandit is a vote for issues.
- What's with the mask?
- I'm protecting myself from madness,
the way I would like to protect this town--
- Ugh. Shut up.
- I mean, imagine if we had a person
to stand up to the cult leader
and not just a dog.
- But I like dogs.
- I like dogs, too.
Look, I don't want to disparage my opponent.
I just wish there was a way to get all your attention
so you could compare my platform to his.
- Oh, I can think of something.
Hello, and welcome to the New Utopia Mayoral Debate.
[chicken clucks, crowd cheering]
The first question is for you both.
Who's a good boy?
Mayor Pancakes, you have 30 seconds.
- [groaning happily]
[laughter] - I like him!
He's like me!
- He's someone you could have a beer with!
- What? - Hey, Bandee?
- Petey?
- No, it's Polly, your girlfriend, remember?
Boop. - Polly, right, right.
- Why don't you take off your mask?
Your face polls really well,
and you're kind of sounding anti-dog.
- I can't risk Petey's gas getting to me today.
I'm running an honest, issues-driven campaign.
Mayor Pancakes is, of course, a good boy,
but he's a bad mayor. [all gasp]
- You say our mayor is bad because he is a dog.
I say, okay.
No, there was more.
I say, tell us your human plan.
What will you do as mayor?
- Well, uh, jobs, education, environment.
- Those are issue areas. What are your policies?
- Uh... [stammers, chuckles]
- Babe, show face.
- [sighs]
[drumroll]
Look at me. [crowd ohs]
I'm cute, too.
[crowd cheering] - He makes a really good point.
- Now, let's have a beer.
I'm someone you can do that with.
[cheering continues]
- But if there are other people around,
then, yes, the size of the yacht matters,
but the speed of the yacht matters,
and maybe that's the distinction
that you need to kind of internalize.
- Huh, amazing story.
My question was about the contract.
- You focus me beautifully.
My adult daughter is such a disappointment.
She makes these necklaces.
Well, she doesn't even make 'em--she has a fabricator.
- Oh, hold that thought. - No, no, no.
Take your time. There is a lesson in this, so I do want--
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll get back.
- May I help you?
- Okay, Dearl, I know I didn't impress you before,
but I need to ask you a favor.
I've got a zaddy here with a red-hot daughter crush on me--
not perverted--and we're renegotiating a contract,
but he doesn't want to talk business.
He just wants to tell me about dinners he's had
and talk shit about his kids.
I got to get him so loose that he lets me set the agenda.
I need more gas.
Think you could make that happen?
- I just want everyone to enjoy this gift from the swamp,
no matter what the intentions.
- You're more of a philosopher than is necessary
for your function, but I appreciate it, Dearl.
- The gas makes you think about things in a new way.
- Everybody go around and say one thing about your life
that freaks you out-- I'll start.
Sometimes I see things in my head
that haven't happened yet, but then they do.
- I feel like there's so much I wanted to do with my life
that I didn't do.
- Like what, fellow traveler?
- I don't know. I just thought--
[scoffs] I can't say it.
Oh, having dreams is so humiliating.
- Whatever it is, let's make it happen
right here in the bar.
- Yes. Whoo-hoo-hoo.
- Who would we even do that?
- We up the gas.
- Big Judy is about to open the door.
[mystical music]
♪ ♪
- Yeah-heh-heh!
- [gasps]
[suspenseful music]
- So everybody's sad.
We go into the cutest little balsamic-vinegar store
on Martha's Vineyard.
Turn the corner, lo and behold, there's a cat...
- Mm-hmm. - In the store.
- We've got to be close. He can't go on like this.
- Oh, we're here,
where gas is swamp and swamp is gas
and gas is me and I am swamp.
Breathe it in, my friends.
- Don, it's been really cool hearing about different stores
that you frequent when you go on vacation,
but I'd like to steer the conversation
back to the contract.
- I told you, I'll hash it out with Mae Mae later.
♪ ♪
Look, I think--I think I'm just so damn proud of you that I--
I think that's what it is.
- Then you'll be happy to know
you don't have to deal with Mae Mae anymore.
You're gonna do this contract with me
because I'm gonna give you the thing you want most,
and I'm gonna give it to you right now.
- You'd do that for me? - Yes.
I will let you take credit for my success.
- All of it? - All of it.
- Say more.
- I'll let you stand at a podium
while people film you talking about how I'm the real deal.
- Oh, my God, yes.
- I'll pose with you for a profile in "Forbes,"
while I sit and you stand with a big meaty hand on my shoulder
and a smug look that says, we're touching.
- Keep going.
- I'll give you the satisfaction
you aren't getting from your own adult daughter.
- I lose money on every one of these.
- I'll even let you promote me
to a position I haven't been prepared for
to give your ethically questionable company
the veneer of gender equality!
- Oh, God, yeah.
We are dying to fire the one woman on our board.
She has been pregnant for months.
- Yes! - [groans contentedly]
- Ha ha!
Dearl?
- I'm up. I'm up.
[cheers and applause]
- I'm undecided.
- It's anyone's race!
[people groaning, coughing]
- Well, thank you for being a part of my success today.
- I can't wait to take credit for you.
- [giggles] - Oh, hi, there, Mae Mae.
- Swamp prank.
Oh, shit, Drippy, what are you doing here?
- Petey here negotiated the contract,
and Drip Co. Enterprises is dropping the exclusivity clause
in our contract with New Utopia.
- Um...
no.
No, it can't be!
- It can be.
There's a whole wide world of ice cream ahead for you,
for everyone.
- Make this make sense. Swamp prank?
- And, of course, with the exclusivity clause gone,
that absolutely means that we'll be pulling our funding
of the alien cruise ship landing terminal.
- The which one?
- The huge complex your father designed
that we've been financing in exchange for exclusive rights.
Mae Mae handles the specifics.
It houses the Dad & Space Museum,
some sort of cryogenics thing,
and all your father's pet projects.
- Don, surely you can reconsider.
- Honestly, this exceptional young woman
made me think of my life in a different light.
And she's right--it just might be time to focus on ice cream.
[engine turning over]
- Don Drippy, how dare you think of things
in a different light?
Sugar beach! What did you do?
- Who's mad? Don't answer that.
[discordant psychedelic music]
♪ ♪
[all cheering]
- I'm gonna lose.
I'm gonna lose to that dog.
- Oh, come on, Bandit.
You didn't really want to be mayor.
You're just a troublemaker.
I know you. - Yeah, I guess you're right.
- The election results are in! - [gasps]
- [barks]
- Why is the mayor shaking my paw?
- [gasps] He's conceding.
Bandee, you won.
- I won? - By one vote.
Turnout was low.
- Well, everyone's been pretty distracted by their own things!
- This is gonna be bad for Petey.
I can't wait to tell her!
- But, Mr. Mayor, we've been suppressing our urges all day.
You won. Let's celebrate by banging it out.
- [chuckles, gasps] Oh, no.
Polly, I'm not horny for you.
- ♪ I'll never-- ♪
- Cool! Sounds good, babe.
Big day for you.
I'll sleep on the couch tonight.
It's easy. My pillow's already there.
[laughs]
[laughter]
- [groans, gasps]
What did we do?
- Action.
- Hi, I'm Eliza, and welcome to my audition
for "Diners, Drive-ins and Dives."
Hi, sharks. [giggles]
Is that how I think all pitches start?
I know you like some nasty bar food,
and I have some, and I want to show it to you.
Look at 'em. Look at these onion rings.
Pick my onion ring.
Pick me for the show.
I want everyone to look at me and like me.
Oh, I am not happy.
I am not happy in this town.
I've been lying to myself.
I should've left when I had the chance.
Oh, no. Oh, no.
I mean, did you ever think--
If you combine ketchup and mustard,
it's called "kustard." [chuckles]
[laughing] I invented it.
- The gas shows what's inside.
- I was just high. I told you, it's not my drug.
[chuckles]
- I'm gonna find a burger.
[ominous music]
- What's going on here? - Nothing going on.
- Look, I know you're embarrassed
that you wanted to play big-lady business boss
and ended up jeopardizing
everything your father and I worked for.
It's okay. Don can cool off.
When he's thinking clearly, I'll invite him back,
wine and dine him, and get your father's amazing space terminal
ready for the benevolent aliens to arrive
and bring us to salvation via comet,
which is what they use for ship.
- Right, so about that, I guess I'm just not 100%
on, like, any of what you just said.
- But the people are counting on the comet,
and the comet is counting on the terminal.
Let me help you.
So you screwed up on gas. Who hasn't?
- I hasn't!
I won the election.
It was only by one vote, but that's enough.
You and I are officially at odds.
- [gasps]
- My anti-Petey platform really spoke to people.
Well, a person.
- You won by one vote?
Oh, no, my final prank.
- What's that, Mama?
- I voted for my son!
He'd be terrible!
Swamp prank!
- Well, congratulations, Mayor Bandit.
I'm looking forward
to watching you be completely ineffective as a leader
and then go back to being a barn farmer.
Now, can you rooter-skedaddy whatever?
- My first mayoral decree-- no more flirt-fighting.
We're officially at odds now.
Now, what about your thing?
Tell Mayor Bandit about your spectacular failure.
- I got what I wanted, too.
- She's on gas. Don't listen to her.
- No, I was on gas.
But even then, I got what I wanted.
I guess I didn't know how to tell you this.
I do think the right thing is more ice cream,
and that's more important
than an alien cruise ship landing terminal.
- I'm anti-cult, but that sounds anti-cult, too.
Are you telling me we're on the same side here?
- In this particular instance.
- Dang it, I don't know how to process this!
[door slams]
- I feel great that I told you what I really want.
Don't you feel great, too?
It's like a huge weight has been lifted.
I'm gonna go scout some new ice cream options.
It's all happening!
- There's a schism in the church.
- I didn't see you much this time.
- I had business to attend to. It was nothing personal.
- It seems like everyone was having fun today except me.
That makes me a little sad.
I always thought I was the glue of my group.
They didn't even care that I had to work.
- You can't rely on other people for your happiness.
- You're so right. Gosh, it feels good to talk.
I really think what's between us--it's real.
- Shh.
Baby, you know I belong to the swamp.
[insects chirping, animals chattering]
- Oh, no.
I [bleep] that guy.