1
00:00:08,091 --> 00:00:10,677
為什麼每部電影
最後都是超級英雄贏啊？

2
00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:13,722
因為人們熱愛邪不勝正的劇情啊

3
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:15,682
而且艾咪為此感到煩躁的樣子超棒

4
00:00:15,765 --> 00:00:16,766
我們再看一次吧

5
00:00:18,351 --> 00:00:21,354
傑克，你要跟你妹和鄰居
度過整個週末耶

6
00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:23,398
你打算繼續嘴砲嗎？

7
00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:28,695
家人們，你們好啊

8
00:00:29,904 --> 00:00:32,574
科比，別再用你的能力嚇人了

9
00:00:32,657 --> 00:00:36,494
聽著，這輩子
家人一直用各種能力惡整我

10
00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:38,830
我現在終於能報復一下了

11
00:00:38,913 --> 00:00:42,208
看看媽對洗手間裡的響尾蛇
會有什麼反應

12
00:00:45,378 --> 00:00:47,589
我覺得他沒考慮過後果

13
00:01:04,856 --> 00:01:07,275
本世紀的超級英雄盛會

14
00:01:07,358 --> 00:01:10,028
將在首府會議中心舉辦

15
00:01:10,111 --> 00:01:13,948
英雄盛典大會
是超級英雄和超級粉絲的見面會

16
00:01:14,032 --> 00:01:15,575
誰會去那種活動啊？

17
00:01:15,658 --> 00:01:18,078
我前五年都有去

18
00:01:18,953 --> 00:01:20,455
特意去的嗎？

19
00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:24,084
現場有超級英雄角色扮演

20
00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:26,086
販售超級英雄T恤、超級英雄零食

21
00:01:26,169 --> 00:01:28,880
我們剛有提到嗎？超級英雄會來喔

22
00:01:28,963 --> 00:01:31,382
有啊，你的確有提到超級英雄

23
00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:34,594
而且這次是絲達琳

24
00:01:34,677 --> 00:01:36,721
在擊敗超級惡棍毀滅者之後

25
00:01:36,805 --> 00:01:40,934
首次在英雄盛典大會亮相，絲達琳

26
00:01:41,017 --> 00:01:42,393
什麼？

27
00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:46,815
沒錯，我要去德州了
那是我最愛的州

28
00:01:46,898 --> 00:01:49,067
別告訴阿肯色州哦

29
00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:53,655
不會吧，絲達琳是我最愛的...

30
00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:57,200
仇恨對象，因為她是妳的勁敵啊

31
00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:00,537
妳真會圓場，我喜歡這個對話的走向

32
00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:02,455
妳還討厭她哪一點？

33
00:02:03,832 --> 00:02:08,211
因為她用可愛討喜的方式
侮辱阿肯色州

34
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:11,548
妳知道嗎？我完全無法說她的壞話

35
00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:12,924
她太完美了

36
00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:17,011
我一直想見到她本人

37
00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:19,848
有一次我想過把自己綁在火箭上

38
00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:21,432
就為了看看她會不會救我

39
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:26,813
我想要為了逃離這段對話
把自己綁在火箭上

40
00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:29,440
我知道她是超級英雄
而妳是超級惡棍

41
00:02:29,524 --> 00:02:31,359
但妳為什麼那麼痛恨她？

42
00:02:31,442 --> 00:02:34,320
這說來話長，我不想講這件事

43
00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:35,905
我們有很多時間

44
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,241
而且我超想講這件事的

45
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:42,579
(傑克說：「這一切源自
毀滅者和絲達琳的史詩之戰」)

46
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:48,668
哇，毀滅者，妳的攻擊流暢不少

47
00:02:48,751 --> 00:02:51,087
妳就加把勁吧，我可能會開始認真打

48
00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:00,763
妳跟我戰鬥的時候
幹嘛一直笑嘻嘻的？

49
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:06,644
因為清新微笑牙膏有付代言費給我啊

50
00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:09,105
好啊，看看妳少了幾顆牙後

51
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:10,982
還能不能繼續當代言人

52
00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:20,158
看樣子我贏定了

53
00:03:28,499 --> 00:03:31,336
狀況不太妙...

54
00:03:40,094 --> 00:03:43,306
用清新微笑牙線剔一下牙縫的碎石吧

55
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:46,434
下次見囉

56
00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:52,774
毀滅者，妳沒事吧？

57
00:03:54,150 --> 00:03:55,360
我贏了嗎？

58
00:03:57,362 --> 00:03:59,489
所有人從此過著幸福快樂的日子

59
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:01,115
除了艾咪之外

60
00:04:02,158 --> 00:04:03,159
好吧，算了

61
00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:05,954
我可能稍微居於絲達琳下風

62
00:04:06,037 --> 00:04:08,456
結果我的一廂情願抹滅了我的存在

63
00:04:09,999 --> 00:04:13,336
但現在最慘的是
全世界都因為這張照片知道我輸了

64
00:04:13,419 --> 00:04:15,380
(禮拜一的樣子)

65
00:04:15,463 --> 00:04:17,632
等等，我以為那個謎因是傑克做的

66
00:04:17,715 --> 00:04:19,550
妳該生氣的對象不是傑克嗎？

67
00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:20,677
我是很氣他

68
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:23,221
但要是絲達琳沒讓我蒙羞

69
00:04:23,304 --> 00:04:25,932
-他就不會做出那張迷因了
-但那是事實啊

70
00:04:26,015 --> 00:04:28,059
妳知道，要不是因為她，我就不會有

71
00:04:28,142 --> 00:04:29,811
一百萬個讚

72
00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:32,230
哈特莉也有按讚

73
00:04:33,898 --> 00:04:35,984
我那時候還不認識妳啊

74
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,862
(谷景高中)

75
00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,157
艾咪？

76
00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:44,826
妳在用功嗎？

77
00:04:44,909 --> 00:04:48,288
用來提升我的爛成績嗎？才不是呢

78
00:04:49,622 --> 00:04:51,499
我在調製特殊藥劑

79
00:04:51,582 --> 00:04:54,460
絲達琳站上英雄盛典大會的舞台時
我要把藥劑倒在她頭上

80
00:04:56,004 --> 00:04:57,297
那是鉻鐵毒藥嗎？

81
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,590
不是，那是石榴汁

82
00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:02,802
這才是鉻鐵毒藥

83
00:05:02,885 --> 00:05:04,095
等等，反了

84
00:05:05,763 --> 00:05:07,432
那是絲達琳唯一的弱點

85
00:05:07,515 --> 00:05:10,184
只要暴露在鉻鐵毒藥之下
她就會昏倒

86
00:05:10,268 --> 00:05:12,228
我知道，想想看她在一票粉絲前昏倒

87
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:13,855
那畫面會有多好玩啊

88
00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:15,440
她這輩子都會淪為笑柄

89
00:05:16,691 --> 00:05:18,276
那聽起來一點都不好玩

90
00:05:18,359 --> 00:05:21,612
是啊，但妳不算我預期中的觀眾

91
00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:25,366
艾咪，妳不能就這樣跑去

92
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,660
人擠人的會議中心報復對方

93
00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:28,745
更正

94
00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:31,164
毀滅者不能這麼做，但是艾咪可以

95
00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:32,707
我現在就只是個普通女孩

96
00:05:32,790 --> 00:05:34,625
我可以混進絲達琳的那群遜砲粉絲

97
00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:36,794
用她羞辱我的方式還以顏色

98
00:05:36,878 --> 00:05:38,671
等等，妳剛剛說我很遜嗎？

99
00:05:38,755 --> 00:05:40,757
哈特莉，要專心對付目標，別分心

100
00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:44,052
艾咪，現在所有惡棍
都知道我們在跑路

101
00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:46,846
代表超級英雄們可能也都知道了

102
00:05:46,929 --> 00:05:50,933
對啊，為了找她算帳
讓大家陷入險境真的值得嗎？

103
00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:53,561
就算變成迷因又怎樣？
那不過是個玩笑罷了

104
00:05:53,644 --> 00:05:55,521
自己變成迷因主角的話就不好笑了

105
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,565
我是妳惹出來的笑話的受害者耶

106
00:05:57,648 --> 00:06:00,026
所以才那麼好笑啊

107
00:06:01,110 --> 00:06:04,447
聽著，我是全世界
最惡名昭彰的超級惡棍之一

108
00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:07,867
可能不是每個人都喜歡我
但沒人把我當成笑柄

109
00:06:08,951 --> 00:06:11,037
我要是不去復仇
我會一直被當成笑柄

110
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,915
那這樣如何，因為我是妳的朋友

111
00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:16,876
如果妳不去英雄盛典大會，我也不去

112
00:06:16,959 --> 00:06:19,629
就算絲達琳是我最愛的超級英雄

113
00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:22,882
而這次是我能最近距離接觸她的機會

114
00:06:22,965 --> 00:06:24,467
趕快說妳不會去

115
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:26,386
因為我比較像是在說服我自己

116
00:06:26,469 --> 00:06:29,806
很高興妳為了我辯論成功，會場見

117
00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:32,642
好了，夠了

118
00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:34,352
如果妳去了

119
00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:36,020
我就把妳是惡棍的事

120
00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:38,523
昭告天下

121
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:40,525
妳是說真的嗎？妳這一週以來

122
00:06:40,608 --> 00:06:42,485
已經威脅過我15次了

123
00:06:43,569 --> 00:06:45,822
這就像歷久彌新的謎因

124
00:06:52,578 --> 00:06:55,623
伊娃，妳得跟妳兒子談談

125
00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:56,916
媽，怎麼了？

126
00:06:57,875 --> 00:06:59,919
這是另一件變身惡作劇的傑作

127
00:07:00,002 --> 00:07:02,630
我刮脖子的毛的時候
他從毛巾架上跳下來

128
00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:05,174
你騙誰啊，你那時候是在刮胸毛

129
00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:07,135
胸膛是脖子的延伸啊

130
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:10,054
你也會刮腿毛啊

131
00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:14,100
基本上人體就是一條長脖子

132
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:17,478
好了，科比，你也玩夠了

133
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,813
該變回來了

134
00:07:18,896 --> 00:07:19,897
好吧

135
00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:26,821
某件事不太對勁

136
00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:28,489
我變不回來

137
00:07:28,573 --> 00:07:29,866
我好像困在毛巾裡了

138
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:32,452
這個嘛

139
00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,078
可以少養一個小孩了？

140
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:49,177
妳連想都別想

141
00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:51,721
我又不是要去英雄盛典大會

142
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:56,058
開始導航到英雄盛典大會

143
00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,395
我又沒有要進去會場

144
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,732
我只是要開車路過
給他們來個超級惡棍式的問候罷了

145
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:04,734
給我進屋裡去

146
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:08,738
哈特莉會負責監視妳
確保妳不會偷溜

147
00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:10,031
那你要去哪？

148
00:08:10,114 --> 00:08:12,325
練棒球啊，我加入球隊了

149
00:08:12,408 --> 00:08:15,411
當我擊中的時候，人們會大聲歡呼
而不是大聲求饒

150
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,247
我們會玩得很開心

151
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,458
誰要去英雄盛典大會啊？
我們有填字遊戲

152
00:08:20,541 --> 00:08:22,793
桌遊還有比手畫腳

153
00:08:24,086 --> 00:08:26,380
我想我只能待在屋子裡了

154
00:08:26,464 --> 00:08:29,008
再度由絲達琳獲勝

155
00:08:30,718 --> 00:08:32,678
傑克，祝你練球愉快

156
00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:36,891
不，在我離開前，我要採取預防措施

157
00:08:40,978 --> 00:08:42,188
-太緊了嗎？
-對

158
00:08:42,271 --> 00:08:43,272
太慘了，掰

159
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,693
別擔心，我們還是能找樂子

160
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,072
來看看有什麼節目

161
00:08:51,155 --> 00:08:53,407
超級英雄襯衫、超級英雄零食
超級...

162
00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:56,994
來點零食也不錯

163
00:08:57,078 --> 00:09:00,164
-我去拿點零食來
-拿零食有什麼用？我又不能用手拿

164
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:01,791
對喔

165
00:09:01,874 --> 00:09:04,210
我們可以用零食玩遊戲啊

166
00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:05,628
我把零食放在碗裡

167
00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,755
妳可以學狗吃飯的樣子吃零食

168
00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:11,509
乖狗狗

169
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:15,972
等等，妳離開前
能不能把手銬弄鬆一點？

170
00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:18,641
拜託，我的手真的很痛

171
00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:20,768
我能相信妳嗎？

172
00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:23,020
當然囉

173
00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,817
妳可以相信我會去英雄盛典大會

174
00:09:28,943 --> 00:09:29,944
哈特莉，妳說得沒錯

175
00:09:30,027 --> 00:09:31,279
妳這模樣挺有趣的

176
00:09:39,495 --> 00:09:41,497
(英雄盛典大會)

177
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:46,002
這服裝真好看
你們都是搭同一輛休旅車來的嗎？

178
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:49,547
嘿，妳要上哪去啊？

179
00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:51,924
妳要變裝才能進去啊

180
00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:55,428
那我該上哪找變裝用的衣服？

181
00:09:57,305 --> 00:09:58,723
(絲達琳戲服一百美元)

182
00:09:58,806 --> 00:10:00,433
門都沒有

183
00:10:00,516 --> 00:10:02,518
我才不要穿絲達琳戲服

184
00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:05,271
那妳就不能入場

185
00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,240
妳在這裡啊

186
00:10:16,324 --> 00:10:18,659
哈特莉，妳怎麼掙脫手銬的？

187
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:21,495
靠一點瑜珈和大量口水辦到的

188
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:25,666
等等，妳扮成毀滅者的樣子？

189
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,501
真是可愛

190
00:10:28,502 --> 00:10:30,379
那是最便宜的戲服了

191
00:10:31,505 --> 00:10:33,174
我真不敢相信妳居然耍我

192
00:10:33,257 --> 00:10:36,302
我不敢相信妳用舔的擺脫手銬

193
00:10:36,385 --> 00:10:40,556
聽著，我得來這裡實行復仇計畫

194
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:42,516
妳不懂每天早上醒來

195
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:44,644
必須重新經歷人生中最丟臉的一刻
是什麼感覺

196
00:10:45,561 --> 00:10:47,521
全世界都把我當笑話看

197
00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:49,482
我越是去想這件事

198
00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:51,400
就越覺得自己很丟臉

199
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:52,818
我懂妳的意思

200
00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:55,571
但有時候妳得放下過去

201
00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:59,158
我的意思是
要是有人發現妳的真實身份呢？

202
00:10:59,241 --> 00:11:02,953
妳是我的朋友
我不希望妳坐一輩子的牢

203
00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,331
這樣能說服妳打消復仇的念頭嗎？

204
00:11:07,583 --> 00:11:09,835
真是可愛

205
00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:15,549
別想

206
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,101
你說什麼？

207
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:27,478
他現在臉朝下，幫他翻面吧

208
00:11:28,771 --> 00:11:30,940
真不敢相信我會以毛巾之姿受困

209
00:11:32,608 --> 00:11:34,485
如果他永遠變不回來呢？

210
00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:37,071
那我就得買一整組新毛巾

211
00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:39,281
搭配這條醜爆的綠色毛巾了

212
00:11:39,990 --> 00:11:41,617
妳就只擔心這點？

213
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,285
嘿，我雖然是名惡棍

214
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:44,662
但我是有品味的好不好

215
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:47,998
安啦，科比
你爺爺剛獲得變身能力時

216
00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:50,418
也發生過一樣的事

217
00:11:50,501 --> 00:11:53,379
你會變回來的
只是可能要花好幾個月吧

218
00:11:54,630 --> 00:11:56,257
好幾個月？

219
00:11:56,340 --> 00:11:59,343
嘿，那對失去兒子來說太久了

220
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:02,304
但對跟這條醜毛巾
待在一起來說太久了

221
00:12:05,349 --> 00:12:07,727
希莉亞來了
該繳房租了，但是我手頭有點緊

222
00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:08,811
我們該怎麼辦？

223
00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:11,439
直接開門就對了，搞不好她忘了啊

224
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:14,942
租金交出來

225
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:19,864
希莉亞，抱歉，我們不能付租金

226
00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:22,324
我不想使出這招的

227
00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:26,036
但你會見識到討債希莉亞的能耐

228
00:12:27,997 --> 00:12:29,290
等等，等等

229
00:12:29,373 --> 00:12:32,334
我們不是繳不出租金

230
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:35,129
我們不繳租金的原因

231
00:12:35,212 --> 00:12:38,674
是因為我們沒有得到
繳租金後該得到的東西

232
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:39,800
你在說什麼鬼話啊？

233
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:43,471
烘乾機壞了，所以我們只好

234
00:12:43,554 --> 00:12:46,056
把毛巾攤在廚房桌上晾乾

235
00:12:46,974 --> 00:12:49,018
你把髒毛巾攤在要吃飯的地方？

236
00:12:51,228 --> 00:12:53,647
好啦，租金降五美元

237
00:12:53,731 --> 00:12:55,399
還有啊

238
00:12:55,483 --> 00:12:57,526
這台果汁機壞了

239
00:13:00,654 --> 00:13:02,573
那是你們的果汁機耶

240
00:13:04,533 --> 00:13:05,659
那是什麼聲音？

241
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:09,455
那是我們不繳房租的頭號原因

242
00:13:09,538 --> 00:13:11,415
這棟房子鬧鬼

243
00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:16,712
那個鬼有錢嗎？

244
00:13:22,551 --> 00:13:24,762
我該怎麼從一群冒牌絲達琳之中

245
00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:27,139
找到正牌絲達琳？

246
00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:28,724
不公平

247
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,227
妳用能力逃離我的身邊

248
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:33,604
妳說什麼啊，我又沒有神速

249
00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:36,982
我的骨頭都快散了

250
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:41,904
嘿，看看那群排隊的人

251
00:13:41,987 --> 00:13:44,114
他們都扮成毀滅者的樣子

252
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:46,116
我有粉絲嗎？

253
00:13:47,284 --> 00:13:48,619
是啊

254
00:13:48,702 --> 00:13:51,455
妳變得比較有自信了

255
00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:54,083
這不會讓妳想早早結束行程

256
00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:55,501
趕快返家嗎？

257
00:13:55,584 --> 00:13:58,838
我都不知道我有毀滅者迷妹

258
00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:00,798
我猜他們是這樣稱呼自己的

259
00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:04,385
我以為全世界的人都在嘲笑我
但看到這些粉絲

260
00:14:04,468 --> 00:14:06,762
讓我了解我依舊受人敬重

261
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:08,389
甚至受人崇拜

262
00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,934
哈特莉，去排隊跪拜我吧

263
00:14:13,185 --> 00:14:17,147
或是我們直接回家如何啊？

264
00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:20,401
絲達琳來了

265
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,946
等等，為什麼她的舞台那麼像屋頂？

266
00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:29,034
她在重現迷因的場景

267
00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:31,078
難怪那些人要扮成我

268
00:14:31,161 --> 00:14:33,789
他們才不是我的粉絲
他們只是在嘲笑我而已

269
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:36,083
等等，妳是因為這樣才扮成我的嗎？

270
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:38,794
不，我永遠不會那樣對妳

271
00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:41,589
我穿的是清倉特賣服耶，記得嗎？

272
00:14:43,924 --> 00:14:47,303
她跟人們收費
重現毀了我一生的迷因？

273
00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:52,600
該走了

274
00:14:55,686 --> 00:15:00,357
等等，那名勇者艦長看起來很眼熟

275
00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:02,318
那是不是...

276
00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:03,402
傑克

277
00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:12,328
傑克？

278
00:15:13,537 --> 00:15:15,372
不，妳認錯人了

279
00:15:15,456 --> 00:15:16,957
我是勇者艦長

280
00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:19,877
嗨

281
00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:23,380
你說過惡棍不該來英雄盛典大會

282
00:15:23,464 --> 00:15:24,965
這裡是英雄盛典大會嗎？

283
00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:26,759
我一定是走錯地方了

284
00:15:26,842 --> 00:15:28,302
我應該要去彭德爾頓的婚禮才對

285
00:15:29,553 --> 00:15:30,930
你怎麼會來這裡？

286
00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:33,515
你為什麼在絲達琳的見面會隊伍裡？

287
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:34,850
好吧

288
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,353
我思考過艾咪說的話了
妳知道，她是對的

289
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:39,146
我們現在是普通人了，所以我認為

290
00:15:39,229 --> 00:15:41,398
我是以普通人的身份來見絲達琳

291
00:15:41,482 --> 00:15:43,484
試著蒐集超級英雄的情報

292
00:15:43,567 --> 00:15:44,944
確認他們沒有追蹤我們家的下落

293
00:15:45,027 --> 00:15:47,446
萬一被跟蹤了就要甩掉他們
我是在保護我們耶

294
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,866
我認為真正的問題是
你們怎麼會在這裡？

295
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,452
我真不敢相信妳把她放出來了

296
00:15:53,535 --> 00:15:55,329
抱歉哦

297
00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:57,915
她是我的第一個人質耶

298
00:15:57,998 --> 00:15:59,959
反正都是你的錯，你明知道

299
00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:02,544
-不該把我一個人留在那裡
-那怎麼會是我的錯？

300
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,755
她跟樓梯銬在一起耶

301
00:16:04,838 --> 00:16:06,382
你是什麼意思？

302
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:07,466
等等，她去哪了？

303
00:16:09,259 --> 00:16:11,720
-我不知道，但我們得找到她
-沒錯

304
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:16,684
我是說，勇者艦長出動囉

305
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:19,395
省省吧，傑克，才沒人信你那套

306
00:16:24,900 --> 00:16:27,820
妳真的以為我會相信這屋子鬧鬼

307
00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:35,035
那妳要怎麼解釋烤麵包機的現象？

308
00:16:35,119 --> 00:16:37,121
現在還多了壁爐功能

309
00:16:37,204 --> 00:16:38,372
妳應該要付我更多租金

310
00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:41,917
好了，科比

311
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,128
你媽和希莉亞隨時都會出現

312
00:16:44,211 --> 00:16:46,880
如果你想過用能力幫助家人

313
00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:48,090
現在就是你大展身手的時候了

314
00:16:48,173 --> 00:16:49,299
希莉亞

315
00:16:49,383 --> 00:16:50,843
租金交出來

316
00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:53,303
我們會付的，讓我去拿一下錢包

317
00:16:53,387 --> 00:16:55,389
快去拿錢，今晚是賓果之夜

318
00:16:55,472 --> 00:16:58,392
聽起來蠻好玩的，我很想加入...

319
00:16:58,475 --> 00:16:59,476
額滿了

320
00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:05,566
-那是什麼聲音？
-那是鬼魅的聲音

321
00:17:05,649 --> 00:17:06,650
我不這麼想

322
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:08,444
聽起來像錄音機之類的

323
00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,322
那的確蠻像鬼魂的聲音

324
00:17:12,406 --> 00:17:14,366
我就說不是...

325
00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:16,285
我是鬼

326
00:17:17,911 --> 00:17:20,622
把這玩意拿走

327
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:22,082
不

328
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:24,752
看吧

329
00:17:24,835 --> 00:17:26,545
這個家鬧鬼了

330
00:17:26,628 --> 00:17:27,838
好吧，好吧

331
00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:32,051
你們承租這棟房子時
有件事我沒告訴你們

332
00:17:32,134 --> 00:17:33,552
這裡是凶宅

333
00:17:33,635 --> 00:17:35,387
-什麼？
-什麼？

334
00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:36,764
好啦

335
00:17:36,847 --> 00:17:38,390
其實是超級凶宅

336
00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:41,643
拜託不要退租

337
00:17:41,727 --> 00:17:44,646
在那件意外發生後，我花了好幾年

338
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,857
才找到願意承租的房客

339
00:17:49,526 --> 00:17:52,112
妳能讓我們討論一下嗎？

340
00:17:52,196 --> 00:17:54,031
如果妳無所謂我就無所謂

341
00:17:54,114 --> 00:17:56,241
我現在更中意這裡了

342
00:17:56,950 --> 00:17:58,327
那我們付一半的租金如何？

343
00:17:58,410 --> 00:17:59,745
也可以，隨便啦

344
00:18:01,205 --> 00:18:03,332
我要回家把所有的毛巾燒光光

345
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:08,879
哇，她真的嚇壞了

346
00:18:08,962 --> 00:18:11,173
她流了一大堆手汗

347
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:14,426
-你拿我擦手？
-抱歉，我忘了

348
00:18:19,681 --> 00:18:23,769
記住，妳是剛毀了屋頂的惡棍

349
00:18:23,852 --> 00:18:26,396
就讓妳接受潰敗感的洗禮吧

350
00:18:31,985 --> 00:18:34,738
我要讓妳接受鉻鐵毒藥的洗禮

351
00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:42,287
我真不敢相信妳又讓她跑了

352
00:18:42,371 --> 00:18:44,998
你知道，對想要成為
更好的人的某人來說

353
00:18:45,082 --> 00:18:46,917
你真的很愛怪罪他們

354
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:49,753
我知道，這都要怪我的壞蛋父母

355
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:51,255
妳看

356
00:18:52,756 --> 00:18:55,676
-糟糕，她手上有鉻鐵毒藥
-我們得阻止她

357
00:18:55,759 --> 00:18:57,469
我得使出怪力，掩護我

358
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:07,271
不太妙...

359
00:19:11,358 --> 00:19:14,027
哇，看來有人等不及要見我了

360
00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:15,571
不

361
00:19:15,654 --> 00:19:17,781
絲達琳救了她一命

362
00:19:17,865 --> 00:19:19,783
什麼？沒有，我才沒有被救呢

363
00:19:20,659 --> 00:19:21,994
不要難為情啦

364
00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:23,662
妳掉落的樣子很優雅

365
00:19:23,745 --> 00:19:26,331
妳曾被超級英雄拯救過嗎？

366
00:19:27,666 --> 00:19:29,751
嗨

367
00:19:29,835 --> 00:19:32,045
哇，是妳耶

368
00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:34,173
但妳已經知道了

369
00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,883
謝謝妳救了我朋友一命

370
00:19:35,966 --> 00:19:38,677
不，她才沒救我
我本來就不會有事，骨頭都好好的

371
00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:45,767
老天，我剛救了絲達琳一命

372
00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:47,603
我接住鉻鐵毒藥了

373
00:19:50,355 --> 00:19:52,733
那是石榴汁，不過謝謝妳救我

374
00:19:55,736 --> 00:19:57,154
我要準備離開了

375
00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:02,201
謝謝各位來到這裡

376
00:20:02,951 --> 00:20:04,536
等等

377
00:20:05,787 --> 00:20:07,497
我是來感謝妳的

378
00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:08,832
是為了什麼事？

379
00:20:17,674 --> 00:20:18,675
救命啊

380
00:20:20,093 --> 00:20:22,304
救救我，我沒辦法自己爬上來

381
00:20:22,387 --> 00:20:24,765
絲達琳，快點，我們得走了

382
00:20:24,848 --> 00:20:25,974
等等，拜託

383
00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:31,230
別讓我摔下去，我很抱歉

384
00:20:46,536 --> 00:20:47,746
妳救了我的命

385
00:20:47,829 --> 00:20:50,332
我是超級英雄
我的職責就是拯救他人性命

386
00:20:52,834 --> 00:20:53,919
謝謝妳

387
00:20:54,628 --> 00:20:55,879
不用謝我

388
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:58,507
我的使命就是讓這個世界更加安全

389
00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:02,344
也許有天你也會守護這個世界

390
00:21:10,394 --> 00:21:11,687
哈囉，是為了什麼事？

391
00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:14,481
為了妳的親筆簽名

392
00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:15,607
當然可以囉

393
00:21:21,488 --> 00:21:22,531
謝了

394
00:21:27,786 --> 00:21:29,913
傑克，你趕快過來

395
00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:32,624
艾咪把她的怒氣
全發洩在椒鹽卷餅小販身上了

396
00:21:32,708 --> 00:21:36,461
鹽巴和芥末醬噴得到處都是

397
00:21:38,297 --> 00:21:39,423
好，我去幫忙

398
00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,176
那就是我的職責

399
00:21:47,597 --> 00:21:50,600
艾咪，妳跑去英雄盛典大會的事
讓我和妳媽很生氣

400
00:21:50,684 --> 00:21:52,686
妳可能會害我們陷入險境

401
00:21:53,562 --> 00:21:54,563
你去告狀了？

402
00:21:54,646 --> 00:21:57,733
他根本不必告狀，看網路就知道了

403
00:21:57,816 --> 00:21:59,860
不會吧，有新的謎因了嗎？

404
00:21:59,943 --> 00:22:01,820
不是，妳現在變成GIF動圖了

405
00:22:03,071 --> 00:22:05,615
(待會來接妳)

406
00:22:05,699 --> 00:22:07,534
待會來接妳

407
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:11,913
振作點，孩子

408
00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:13,832
我知道妳大概覺得自己很悲慘

409
00:22:13,915 --> 00:22:15,709
但至少妳不是一條毛巾啊

410
00:22:16,418 --> 00:22:17,794
嘿

411
00:22:17,878 --> 00:22:19,546
我們該去睡了

412
00:22:19,629 --> 00:22:21,965
我和科比早上要去上熱瑜珈課

413
00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:23,717
我們一定會滿身大汗

414
00:22:26,386 --> 00:22:27,929
什麼？不...

415
00:22:29,931 --> 00:22:31,141
對了

416
00:22:31,224 --> 00:22:33,268
這間是凶宅哦

417
00:22:33,352 --> 00:22:34,519
晚安

418
00:22:36,146 --> 00:22:37,272
等等，她說什麼？

419
00:22:37,356 --> 00:22:39,441
案發時間？案發現場？死亡手法呢？

420
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:44,654
很好，我想我又淪為笑柄了

421
00:22:44,738 --> 00:22:46,531
不，妳才沒有呢

422
00:22:48,325 --> 00:22:49,910
其實我很以妳為傲

423
00:22:49,993 --> 00:22:53,038
為什麼，絲達琳又贏了耶？

424
00:22:53,121 --> 00:22:54,122
妳想想看

425
00:22:54,206 --> 00:22:56,291
妳當時就站在她旁邊

426
00:22:56,375 --> 00:22:58,710
妳當時隨時都能失控

427
00:22:58,794 --> 00:23:01,755
變回毀滅者，但妳沒有這麼做

428
00:23:01,838 --> 00:23:03,507
那代表妳成長了

429
00:23:03,590 --> 00:23:07,094
是啊，惡棍不該有所成長的

430
00:23:08,387 --> 00:23:10,889
這個嘛，毀滅者不能有所成長

431
00:23:10,972 --> 00:23:13,016
但艾咪成長了

432
00:23:13,100 --> 00:23:17,479
絲達琳或許贏了那場戰役
但學會放下，就是妳贏了

433
00:23:19,898 --> 00:23:22,025
我想我從沒那麼想過

434
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:25,112
妳還贏了跟椒鹽卷餅小販的戰役

435
00:23:25,195 --> 00:23:27,906
我為了麵包和鹽付了十美元
而且我是惡棍耶

436
00:23:32,661 --> 00:23:36,415
艾咪，妳不會相信
妳的臥室發生了什麼事

437
00:23:36,498 --> 00:23:38,333
人都走了

438
00:23:49,594 --> 00:23:50,595
我知道你的身份

439
00:23:50,679 --> 00:23:51,805
(我知道你的身份，絲達琳)

440
00:23:54,224 --> 00:23:56,226
字幕翻譯：王沛可