1
00:00:34,410 --> 00:00:38,831
Okay, there I am at my roommate's
bandmate's funeral thinking,
2
00:00:38,915 --> 00:00:41,500
"Whoa, like, what if I can die?"
3
00:00:41,584 --> 00:00:44,087
And just when I found out I'm a cinephile?
4
00:00:44,754 --> 00:00:47,506
Anyway, that's why I'm busy
writing this movie.
5
00:00:47,590 --> 00:00:49,050
So don't bother calling.
6
00:00:49,759 --> 00:00:51,594
This is your son, by the way.
7
00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:53,554
Young Neil.
8
00:01:09,779 --> 00:01:11,948
I've written nothing?
9
00:01:29,924 --> 00:01:31,717
What?
10
00:01:40,393 --> 00:01:43,729
My sleep paralysis demon?
11
00:02:13,843 --> 00:02:17,263
I wrote
a feature-length screenplay in my sleep.
12
00:02:18,973 --> 00:02:20,474
I'm a screenwriter!
13
00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:30,520
You changed your hair. What's up, Ramona?
14
00:04:30,604 --> 00:04:32,105
Nothing major.
15
00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:35,275
Just, somebody kidnapped
Scott Pilgrim and faked his death.
16
00:04:35,359 --> 00:04:36,861
You're f****** joking.
17
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,364
Stacey, I'm taking my fifteen.
18
00:04:40,448 --> 00:04:42,616
You took your fifteen 20 minutes ago!
19
00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:45,494
And would you stop swearing?
We have f******* customers!
20
00:04:45,578 --> 00:04:46,454
F*** my life!
21
00:04:48,748 --> 00:04:50,333
Tell me everything.
22
00:04:51,625 --> 00:04:55,963
Last night, in my dreams,
I saw Scott's subspace highway...
23
00:04:57,757 --> 00:04:58,840
and heard his voice.
24
00:04:58,924 --> 00:05:02,010
Ramona...
25
00:05:02,094 --> 00:05:03,512
Subspace what?
26
00:05:04,013 --> 00:05:05,097
It doesn't matter.
27
00:05:05,681 --> 00:05:07,683
I think it means he's alive.
28
00:05:15,191 --> 00:05:17,526
So I went back to The Rockit
to look at the security footage
29
00:05:17,610 --> 00:05:19,487
of what we thought was Scott's death.
30
00:05:39,924 --> 00:05:43,636
Someone grabbed him
and pulled him into a portal.
31
00:05:50,601 --> 00:05:52,645
Somebody wants us to think he's dead.
32
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:55,856
I knew it was too good to be true.
33
00:05:55,940 --> 00:05:57,525
Can a guy get a croissant?
34
00:05:58,234 --> 00:06:00,193
Wallace? Have you been out all night?
35
00:06:00,277 --> 00:06:02,405
- Did you say Scott's alive?
- Yeah.
36
00:06:04,573 --> 00:06:05,490
Trippy.
37
00:06:05,574 --> 00:06:08,160
Well, if you see him,
tell him I changed the locks.
38
00:06:08,244 --> 00:06:11,205
And if you see me,
remind me to change the locks.
39
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:13,874
Your sugar daddy days are over?
40
00:06:13,958 --> 00:06:15,834
For him, absolutely.
41
00:06:15,918 --> 00:06:17,294
For others, we'll see.
42
00:06:17,378 --> 00:06:19,296
The future is a mystery.
43
00:06:19,380 --> 00:06:20,881
Here's your f****** croissant!
44
00:06:22,466 --> 00:06:23,509
Ladies.
45
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,720
So why would someone kidnap Scott?
46
00:06:26,804 --> 00:06:29,848
And why would they get my hopes up
by making it seem like he was dead?
47
00:06:29,932 --> 00:06:31,850
I haven't figured that out yet.
48
00:06:31,934 --> 00:06:32,851
Yet?
49
00:06:32,935 --> 00:06:34,978
Don't tell me
you're gonna try to find him.
50
00:06:35,062 --> 00:06:36,646
I think I have to.
51
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:40,359
Ramona, I don't see
how any of this is your responsibility.
52
00:06:40,443 --> 00:06:43,320
You went on one date.
How good could it have been?
53
00:06:43,404 --> 00:06:45,614
Honestly, great.
54
00:06:45,698 --> 00:06:49,284
Your date with Scott Pilgrim?
55
00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:50,369
Yikes.
56
00:06:51,245 --> 00:06:53,038
Well, more power to you.
57
00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:55,415
So what's your next move, Columbo?
58
00:06:55,499 --> 00:06:57,334
Well, you know everyone, right?
59
00:06:57,418 --> 00:07:00,796
I thought you could give me a rundown
of the major characters in Scott's life.
60
00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,674
More like major suspects.
61
00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:08,053
Well, let's see. There's Stephen Stills.
62
00:07:08,137 --> 00:07:10,138
My ex, the singer in the band.
63
00:07:10,222 --> 00:07:13,558
He's a mess. Too much anxiety
for even the simplest decisions.
64
00:07:13,642 --> 00:07:16,061
No way could he mastermind a kidnapping.
65
00:07:16,145 --> 00:07:19,231
Then there's Stephen's roommate,
Young Neil.
66
00:07:19,315 --> 00:07:22,651
He's kinda sheltered, and he's only 19,
but don't let that fool you.
67
00:07:22,735 --> 00:07:25,070
He's an idiot.
He'd make Scott look like a genius,
68
00:07:25,154 --> 00:07:27,573
but he can't,
because that's literally impossible.
69
00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:29,282
What about Envy Adams?
70
00:07:29,366 --> 00:07:32,160
Oh boy! Scott's ex. The big one--
71
00:07:32,244 --> 00:07:36,998
Excuse me. I asked for an iced Americano.
This is a hot Americano--
72
00:07:37,082 --> 00:07:38,626
Then add some ice cubes to it!
73
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:40,669
You stupid f***.
74
00:07:40,753 --> 00:07:44,714
As I was saying, Envy Adams
pulled Scott's heart out of his chest
75
00:07:44,798 --> 00:07:47,801
and stomped all over it
with her patent leather combat boots.
76
00:07:47,885 --> 00:07:50,470
And that was before she went on
to become a global sex symbol.
77
00:07:50,554 --> 00:07:52,764
I saw her do her thing at the funeral.
78
00:07:52,848 --> 00:07:54,599
She's even hotter in person.
79
00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,226
Are we sure they dated?
80
00:07:56,310 --> 00:07:59,980
Yeah, you're obviously not the only one
with questionable taste, Ramona.
81
00:08:00,856 --> 00:08:01,732
Who else?
82
00:08:02,525 --> 00:08:05,485
You know who you should talk to?
His other ex.
83
00:08:05,569 --> 00:08:08,864
- She's known him longer than anyone.
- Okay. Who is she?
84
00:08:15,037 --> 00:08:17,497
What is Sex Bob-omb without Scott?
85
00:08:17,581 --> 00:08:23,087
He really added something to our sound,
something undefinable.
86
00:08:23,671 --> 00:08:25,672
Bass. He added bass.
87
00:08:25,756 --> 00:08:27,424
Right! Exactly!
88
00:08:27,967 --> 00:08:29,718
Can we have a band with no bass?
89
00:08:30,219 --> 00:08:32,971
What if we find a new bass player
and they make us worse?
90
00:08:33,055 --> 00:08:36,308
The odds are they'd make us better
because we probably sucked.
91
00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:38,811
There's always Scott's understudy.
92
00:08:45,150 --> 00:08:47,319
No! I fear change!
93
00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:51,573
Hey, you wanna
try playing something together?
94
00:08:51,657 --> 00:08:52,866
Just for fun?
95
00:08:52,950 --> 00:08:54,201
Me and you?
96
00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:56,412
I don't see anyone else in here.
97
00:09:00,416 --> 00:09:02,626
How long have you been playing the drums?
98
00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:04,837
A long time. Since I was 14.
99
00:09:05,421 --> 00:09:07,714
Drumming is a great outlet
for my emotions.
100
00:09:07,798 --> 00:09:09,842
- Rage, mostly.
- Wow!
101
00:09:10,509 --> 00:09:12,970
But how do I know which notes to play?
102
00:09:13,554 --> 00:09:16,098
It's up to you.
That's why they call it "play."
103
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:26,960
Whoa!
104
00:10:30,047 --> 00:10:32,174
How long have you been playing bass?
105
00:10:34,927 --> 00:10:36,053
What time is it?
106
00:10:37,096 --> 00:10:38,013
4 p.m.
107
00:10:38,889 --> 00:10:40,348
Then, four hours.
108
00:10:40,432 --> 00:10:41,600
I'm late for work.
109
00:10:42,184 --> 00:10:46,230
Have you ever thought about collaborating
with a seasoned songwriter?
110
00:11:01,412 --> 00:11:03,747
- Sorry, I'm late.
- I don't care.
111
00:11:11,505 --> 00:11:13,590
Kim, customer.
112
00:11:18,387 --> 00:11:19,387
Funny thought.
113
00:11:19,471 --> 00:11:23,016
Maybe he faked his own death
to get out of paying his late fees.
114
00:11:23,100 --> 00:11:24,225
You're half right.
115
00:11:24,309 --> 00:11:25,560
Which half?
116
00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:26,729
He's not dead.
117
00:11:28,230 --> 00:11:29,857
The house always wins.
118
00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:33,360
It's just a dumb thing a dumb person
told me one time.
119
00:11:33,944 --> 00:11:36,821
So. You've been using
Scott's unconscious dreamscape
120
00:11:36,905 --> 00:11:38,823
to deliver DVDs quicker?
121
00:11:38,907 --> 00:11:41,660
You're the first person in Canada
to understand that.
122
00:11:41,744 --> 00:11:43,328
It's not a complicated concept.
123
00:11:43,829 --> 00:11:46,081
No wonder you're putting us
out of business.
124
00:11:46,582 --> 00:11:49,251
- Canada?
- No, video stores.
125
00:11:50,961 --> 00:11:53,756
Julie said you knew him the longest.
When did you meet?
126
00:11:57,176 --> 00:11:59,011
You told me you were good at drawing.
127
00:11:59,595 --> 00:12:00,845
Maps are hard.
128
00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:03,056
If I had to draw a sheep, though,
I'd draw it perfect.
129
00:12:03,140 --> 00:12:04,265
A sheep?
130
00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:05,392
Draw me a sheep.
131
00:12:07,978 --> 00:12:10,397
That's the worst sheep I've ever seen.
132
00:12:10,481 --> 00:12:13,192
What are you talking about?
This sheep is excellent!
133
00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:19,155
He was always an idiot.
134
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:22,659
But one thing led to another,
and to my continued embarrassment,
135
00:12:23,452 --> 00:12:27,247
Scott Pilgrim became my first boyfriend.
136
00:12:28,540 --> 00:12:32,919
Is Scott drawing you a sheep
your most romantic memory, or...
137
00:12:33,003 --> 00:12:35,755
There was this one time
I was kidnapped by a rival school,
138
00:12:35,839 --> 00:12:38,591
and Scott had to fight through
an entire army of teen jerks
139
00:12:38,675 --> 00:12:40,927
and their leader Simon Lee to rescue me.
140
00:12:41,011 --> 00:12:42,721
That's a romantic memory.
141
00:12:44,473 --> 00:12:48,852
Yeah, but how romantic can a memory be
if things ended terribly?
142
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:53,523
Well, you're still friends.
143
00:12:53,607 --> 00:12:55,191
That's gotta be a good sign.
144
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:57,569
He's at least a lovable idiot, right?
145
00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:03,075
You like him, don't you?
146
00:13:04,743 --> 00:13:06,036
There were sparks.
147
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:08,830
You're in trouble.
148
00:13:08,914 --> 00:13:10,915
Why does this always happen to me?
149
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:14,086
I don't know. Maybe you could ask
one of your seven evil exes?
150
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:17,922
I kinda assumed
they'd be your first suspects.
151
00:13:18,006 --> 00:13:19,675
I'm not in a hurry to see them.
152
00:13:23,637 --> 00:13:24,846
What?
153
00:13:24,930 --> 00:13:26,639
Sounds like Hollie's taking care of it.
154
00:13:26,723 --> 00:13:28,058
Kim! Customer!
155
00:13:31,061 --> 00:13:32,353
This is unexpected.
156
00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:34,856
Well, you better get better at expecting.
157
00:13:34,940 --> 00:13:36,816
You two know each other?
158
00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:39,111
We were college roommates.
159
00:13:39,945 --> 00:13:41,112
And more!
160
00:13:41,196 --> 00:13:42,280
And more.
161
00:13:42,364 --> 00:13:44,324
So, you're...
162
00:13:44,825 --> 00:13:48,495
Roxie Richter! Ramona's fourth evil ex!
163
00:13:48,579 --> 00:13:49,496
Okay!
164
00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:51,706
Fourth? What about two and three?
165
00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:54,042
Four ain't nothing but a number, baby.
166
00:13:54,126 --> 00:13:55,836
Besides, the League lies in ruin.
167
00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:58,630
So here I am!
168
00:13:58,714 --> 00:14:00,548
Rox you like a hurricane!
169
00:14:00,632 --> 00:14:01,675
Why are you even--
170
00:14:02,968 --> 00:14:04,636
I'm here for us, Ramona.
171
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:06,471
First in line to win your heart.
172
00:14:06,555 --> 00:14:09,057
Because I have something
the others never will.
173
00:14:09,141 --> 00:14:10,558
Which is what, exactly?
174
00:14:10,642 --> 00:14:12,769
Emotional intelligence.
175
00:14:12,853 --> 00:14:16,064
None of these boys know
how to talk about their feelings.
176
00:14:16,148 --> 00:14:18,733
What you fail to mention is
that when it comes to feelings,
177
00:14:18,817 --> 00:14:20,360
you're as clueless as the boys.
178
00:14:20,444 --> 00:14:23,530
That is so unfair!
You're just impossible to talk to!
179
00:14:23,614 --> 00:14:25,908
You want to talk about feelings?
Start talking.
180
00:14:26,992 --> 00:14:28,619
I've got a better idea.
181
00:14:29,494 --> 00:14:30,995
Let's fight about 'em!
182
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:33,873
Roxie Richter versus Ramona Flowers!
183
00:14:33,957 --> 00:14:34,791
Fight!
184
00:14:36,168 --> 00:14:37,002
Whoa!
185
00:14:46,595 --> 00:14:48,472
Are we really doing this again?
186
00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:58,690
Ramona! You b****!
187
00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:01,026
Get off!
188
00:15:15,749 --> 00:15:16,792
An old movie?
189
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:23,465
Come on!
190
00:15:30,681 --> 00:15:32,432
They're ruining my movie.
191
00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:34,434
I'm taking my fifteen.
192
00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:40,190
Ora!
193
00:15:45,529 --> 00:15:46,530
You're done--
194
00:15:53,412 --> 00:15:54,496
That's cheap.
195
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,852
I don't want to fight you, Roxie.
196
00:16:17,686 --> 00:16:19,980
Gonna run away? Like you did back then?
197
00:16:37,289 --> 00:16:38,999
Roxie, I...
198
00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:11,156
Roxie...
199
00:17:12,449 --> 00:17:13,283
I'm sorry.
200
00:17:15,452 --> 00:17:16,286
For what?
201
00:17:17,245 --> 00:17:18,789
For leaving the way I did.
202
00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:51,196
I was too afraid to face you.
203
00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:54,073
So you left without a word?
204
00:17:54,157 --> 00:17:56,326
You made me feel like nothing!
205
00:17:56,868 --> 00:17:58,286
You were afraid?
206
00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:00,038
Good for you!
207
00:18:00,122 --> 00:18:02,791
All I wanted was for you to see me!
208
00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:06,336
I'm sorry.
209
00:18:09,297 --> 00:18:11,967
Apology accepted.
210
00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:15,053
But that doesn't mean
I'm gonna let you win.
211
00:18:33,572 --> 00:18:34,406
Roxie!
212
00:18:58,138 --> 00:18:59,055
Roxie!
213
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:43,141
As far as I'm concerned, you won.
214
00:19:45,435 --> 00:19:50,815
College doesn't seem that long ago,
but we were pretty immature, weren't we?
215
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:04,662
You know, I can't remember the last time
I just hung out with the girls.
216
00:20:04,746 --> 00:20:05,872
This is nice.
217
00:20:05,956 --> 00:20:07,790
The snacks aren't free, you know.
218
00:20:07,874 --> 00:20:10,251
Come on! Fighting makes me hungry.
219
00:20:10,335 --> 00:20:13,588
- You were really kicking my ass.
- You're not just saying that?
220
00:20:13,672 --> 00:20:15,339
I never just say anything.
221
00:20:15,423 --> 00:20:16,925
Nice. Should we kiss?
222
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:20,387
I have unfinished business with Scott.
223
00:20:20,929 --> 00:20:22,263
Emotional business?
224
00:20:22,347 --> 00:20:23,723
He's dead, Ramona.
225
00:20:23,807 --> 00:20:27,977
He's not dead. It's complicated.
I've gotta find him first.
226
00:20:28,061 --> 00:20:30,397
But I'd like to be your friend.
227
00:20:30,897 --> 00:20:32,982
- With benefits?
- No benefits.
228
00:20:33,066 --> 00:20:33,900
Worth a shot.
229
00:20:33,984 --> 00:20:35,026
What about you?
230
00:20:36,653 --> 00:20:37,529
I'm not...
231
00:20:50,500 --> 00:20:51,751
No sparks.
232
00:20:52,544 --> 00:20:53,628
Worth a shot.
233
00:20:53,712 --> 00:20:56,047
What about your hot coworker?
Is she coming back?
234
00:20:56,131 --> 00:20:58,133
Okay, it's time for you to leave.
235
00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:07,266
At least I have one less suspect.
236
00:21:07,350 --> 00:21:09,560
Roxie didn't know Scott was alive.
237
00:21:09,644 --> 00:21:12,730
This was a productive day
as far as fights are concerned.
238
00:21:12,814 --> 00:21:15,859
Everybody needs closure.
That's why they call it closure.
239
00:21:16,526 --> 00:21:18,986
Now you're one step closer
to the dumb boy of your dreams,
240
00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:21,155
and you buried the hatchet with an ex.
241
00:21:21,239 --> 00:21:22,574
Multitasking.
242
00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:35,170
Don't tell me I'm gonna have to do this
with all seven of them.
243
00:21:36,171 --> 00:21:39,924
Hollywood legend Lucas Lee
is one of your exes?
244
00:21:41,051 --> 00:21:42,260
Unfortunately.
245
00:21:42,344 --> 00:21:43,302
Damn, Ramona.
246
00:21:43,386 --> 00:21:47,181
I know he's a handsome, big-chested,
devil-may-care Hollywood d-bag,
247
00:21:47,265 --> 00:21:51,561
but is he evil enough
to kidnap a dude and fake his death?
248
00:21:52,562 --> 00:21:54,189
Only one way to find out.
249
00:22:03,782 --> 00:22:06,618
My mistake.
I thought you were a garbage can. Sorry!
250
00:22:20,924 --> 00:22:21,758
F***!
251
00:22:29,099 --> 00:22:31,351
Gideon Graves? G-Man?
252
00:22:32,602 --> 00:22:35,313
So you don't remember me.
253
00:22:37,190 --> 00:22:39,442
Gideon Graves wasn't my birth name.
254
00:22:39,526 --> 00:22:41,403
It was an identity I created.
255
00:22:42,445 --> 00:22:46,449
When I moved to New York City,
I left my past behind and leveled up.
256
00:22:47,283 --> 00:22:51,371
But back in the day,
you knew me by another name.
257
00:22:59,170 --> 00:23:00,087
Gordon?
258
00:23:00,171 --> 00:23:02,674
Gordon Goose from North Bay, Ontario?
259
00:23:03,341 --> 00:23:04,342
Fearless.
260
00:23:05,301 --> 00:23:06,761
Then you do remember me.
261
00:23:07,595 --> 00:23:09,430
You may be the only one who does.
262
00:23:09,514 --> 00:23:12,434
Julie, I've lost everything.
263
00:23:13,309 --> 00:23:17,521
My empire is gone.
My billionaire friends have shunned me.
264
00:23:17,605 --> 00:23:20,191
Even my millionaire friends
have turned their backs.
265
00:23:20,775 --> 00:23:23,153
I couldn't even get
a reservation at McDonald's.
266
00:23:23,653 --> 00:23:25,363
They laughed at me when I called.
267
00:23:26,448 --> 00:23:29,617
So I spent the last of my pocket money
on bus fare to Toronto
268
00:23:30,326 --> 00:23:33,705
just to see one sympathetic face.
269
00:23:40,170 --> 00:23:41,004
Gordon,
270
00:23:41,796 --> 00:23:43,506
get your butt in here.