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00:00:11,262 --> 00:00:13,681
["Bloom" by Necry Talkie playing]
2
00:01:38,808 --> 00:01:40,226
[song ends]
3
00:01:42,186 --> 00:01:44,104
[gentle music playing]
4
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[narrator reading]
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00:02:03,499 --> 00:02:05,418
[dramatic swell]
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00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:10,589
[interviewer] Is it true neither of you
have acted before?
7
00:02:10,673 --> 00:02:15,594
Yes. But we're very, very famous,
and that's basically the same thing.
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00:02:15,678 --> 00:02:17,304
[crowd singing "Black Sheep" by Metric]
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00:02:17,388 --> 00:02:19,890
♪ Hello again, friend of a friend ♪
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00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:22,018
♪ I knew you when ♪
11
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♪ Our common goal
Was waiting for the world to end ♪
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♪ Now that the truth... ♪
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We're rock stars. We do what we want.
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And what we want right now
is to be movie stars.
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[Envy] Mm-hmm.
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[crowd continues singing "Black Sheep"]
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[song ends]
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People keep asking me
if the movie lives up to my "vision."
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00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:53,632
I guess, if I'm being honest,
20
00:02:53,716 --> 00:02:56,636
this whole shoot
does feel a little blurry.
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- My mom says I should get my eyes checked.
- [bloops]
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We're just trying
to honor Mister Neil's tremendous script,
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which I think is truly a tribute
to this great city.
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I'd even go so far as to say Toronto
is a character in the movie.
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A major character.
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00:03:13,277 --> 00:03:15,404
Really? He said that?
27
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Who did he cast to play Toronto?
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[interviewer] Uh, guys,
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aren't we supposed to be interviewing
Envy Adams' stunt double now?
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- [Ramona panting]
- [loud crash]
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[whoosh]
32
00:03:27,667 --> 00:03:29,668
Hey, I'm Ramona Flowers.
33
00:03:29,752 --> 00:03:32,963
They said I should come talk to you?
It's my first day.
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[interviewer] You're the stunt double
for Ramona Flowers,
35
00:03:35,383 --> 00:03:38,802
and your name is also Ramona Flowers?
36
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[whimsical music playing]
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- [bloop]
- Mm-hmm.
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Is that Ramona Flowers, the stunt double,
or Ramona Flowers the character?
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[Ramona] I'm a physical person,
but I never thought about stunt work.
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Turns out I'm pretty good at it.
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- [Envy] Ramona!
- Huh?
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00:03:56,696 --> 00:03:57,779
[whoosh]
43
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When you're done up there,
I've got another stunt for you.
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[Ramona] No problem.
45
00:04:01,701 --> 00:04:02,701
- [whoosh]
- Great.
46
00:04:02,785 --> 00:04:06,538
I need you to run over to my hotel room
and give my dog some medication.
47
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It'll be in a blue bag on the counter.
48
00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:10,834
- [whoosh]
- [chimes]
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00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:11,836
[sighs]
50
00:04:13,170 --> 00:04:15,881
[interviewer] Do you think this could be
the beginning of a new career?
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00:04:15,965 --> 00:04:18,592
Actually, I only took this job
because security realized
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I wasn't working on the movie,
and I needed an excuse to be on set
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so I could get close enough to Todd
to find out if he used a vegan portal
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to kidnap this guy
I went out with one time.
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[whoosh]
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[interviewer] Uh, what?
57
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[assistant] Quiet!
We're rehearsing, people!
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All right, I guess we're
gonna work on blocking
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00:04:35,818 --> 00:04:38,070
while our diva gaffer does his thing.
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Todd, do you know what blocking is?
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- Hold it.
- [Ramona] Hmm?
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[Envy] No stunts today.
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00:04:44,243 --> 00:04:47,412
- I... I just wanted to ask Todd--
- [Envy] You're not wanted here, Ramona.
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00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:49,456
Todd is busy.
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We're acting, okay?
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00:04:52,543 --> 00:04:54,002
So, skate on.
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[melancholy music playing]
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As you can see,
the lighting in the scene is super dark
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to represent the darkness in Scott's soul.
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00:05:02,928 --> 00:05:05,847
[interviewer]
Uh, Young Neil, your glasses.
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00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:08,434
[Young Neil] Huh? Yeah,
I finally got a prescription.
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00:05:09,435 --> 00:05:12,021
- [interviewer] Th... They're sunglasses.
- Huh?
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00:05:13,105 --> 00:05:15,732
Oh, wow! [chuckles]
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I was wondering.
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[interviewer] There's no precedent
for the path you've taken.
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From heckling on the sidelines
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to co-lead
in a major Canadian blockbuster.
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Can you speak to that?
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I decided the only thing better
than being me, was getting paid to be me.
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00:05:32,416 --> 00:05:34,210
Why be Wallace Wells for free?
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[assistant] Quiet on the set!
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[slate girl] Scott Pilgrim's
Precious Little Life, scene 43, take one.
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- [board claps]
- [director] And action!
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Why don't we try having Scott
gently put his hand on Ramona's back?
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00:05:54,730 --> 00:05:57,233
- No, no, no, no, cut!
- [Envy and Todd moan]
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[slate girl] Scott Pilgrim's
Precious Little Life, scene 43, take two.
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00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:04,240
- [board claps]
- [director] And action!
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All right, Todd,
just a gentle little touch.
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- [twirling]
- [romantic music plays]
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[both moaning]
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00:06:16,168 --> 00:06:18,671
[Young Neil] A movie set
is kinda like a chemistry set.
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00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:21,882
- Some people just have too much chemistry.
- Huh?
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00:06:21,966 --> 00:06:25,260
[Young Neil] And what happens when you mix
a bunch of volatile chemicals?
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00:06:25,344 --> 00:06:26,762
[man] You get an explosion.
95
00:06:26,846 --> 00:06:28,972
- You do? That's dangerous!
- [loud explosion]
96
00:06:29,056 --> 00:06:32,559
Why are we mixing volatile chemicals
on a movie set in the first place?
97
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[slate girl] Scene 43, take 18.
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- [board claps]
- [director] Action!
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- [romantic music playing]
- [both moaning]
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[slate girl] Scene 43, take 32!
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- [board claps]
- [director] Action!
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[romantic music continues]
103
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[slate girl] Scene 43, take 43.
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- [board claps]
- [director yells] Action!
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- [romantic music continues]
- [roars]
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[sighs]
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[howls]
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- [Envy and Todd moaning]
- [music continues, distorts]
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[Envy] We've been together
since we were 11 years old.
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Every day more magical than the last.
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Right, baby?
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00:07:02,882 --> 00:07:05,384
Vegans are unusually loyal
to their partners.
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They never waver.
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00:07:07,470 --> 00:07:08,679
That's true.
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[Envy and Todd moaning]
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[dramatic sting]
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- Hey, buddy, it's not that bad.
- Huh?
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Maybe we just need to rethink the scene.
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This is the dumb version. But what if...
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[whispering indistinctly]
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[gasps]
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- Yes!
- Hmm?
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Yes!
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[slate girl] Scene 43, take 44.
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- [board claps]
- [director] And action!
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Scott and Wallace.
Let's look at each other.
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Deep into each other's eyes.
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You've never seen
eyes like these in your life.
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- [enchanted sparkling]
- [bloops]
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You're forgetting Ramona,
forgetting all about her.
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[tender music playing]
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Now, kiss!
Kiss like your life depends on it!
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- [both moaning]
- [tender music continues]
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[fireworks whistling, exploding]
135
00:08:04,568 --> 00:08:06,153
[Todd and Wallace moaning]
136
00:08:06,237 --> 00:08:07,696
- [music halts]
- [director] Cut! Print!
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00:08:07,780 --> 00:08:11,950
I think we're onto something here, gang.
Scott, Wallace, great work!
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- [flies buzzing]
- I don't remember writing that part.
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[assistant] That's lunch, people!
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[growls]
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00:08:20,584 --> 00:08:21,418
[scoffs]
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[breathing heavily]
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00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:25,047
- [whoosh]
- [exhales]
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Oh.
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- [fireworks bursting]
- [horn blows]
146
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[Stephen and Knives] Ramona!
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Would you do us a huge favor
and give this to Envy Adams?
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We wrote a song
for her to sing in the movie!
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00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:42,189
Please! It's like a cross
between the last number in All That Jazz
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00:08:42,273 --> 00:08:43,899
and the first number in Grease 2!
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[whimsical music plays]
152
00:08:46,902 --> 00:08:48,445
What just happened?
153
00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:50,239
Not sure.
154
00:08:50,739 --> 00:08:53,074
- Want to run lines in your trailer?
- Huh?
155
00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:57,704
- [Todd and Wallace moaning]
- [trailer creaking]
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[tender music playing]
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00:09:01,667 --> 00:09:02,626
[Todd] Hmm.
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00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:07,214
Hey, so, um...
So, quick question, um, about the script.
159
00:09:07,298 --> 00:09:09,090
Run lines in your trailer?
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00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:11,594
- [Todd and Wallace moaning]
- [trailer creaking]
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00:09:12,386 --> 00:09:13,720
Lines in your trailer?
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00:09:13,804 --> 00:09:15,723
[trailer creaking intensely]
163
00:09:16,724 --> 00:09:17,849
Lines? Trailer?
164
00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:20,185
- [trailer continues creaking]
- [Wallace] Okay.
165
00:09:20,686 --> 00:09:23,606
[Envy] He's my best friend,
best friend with benefits.
166
00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:25,607
It's a lifelong thing for us.
167
00:09:25,691 --> 00:09:28,360
Sure, we experimented with other people.
168
00:09:28,444 --> 00:09:31,863
He dated Ramona. I dated Scott Pilgrim.
169
00:09:31,947 --> 00:09:33,991
But he always came back to me.
170
00:09:35,034 --> 00:09:36,368
I'm his destiny.
171
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[Ramona] Me and Todd?
172
00:09:38,454 --> 00:09:40,456
Uh, yeah.
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00:09:40,956 --> 00:09:42,165
[reminiscing music playing]
174
00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:44,501
He went to my high school junior year.
175
00:09:44,585 --> 00:09:47,671
He told me the love of his life
was waiting for him back in Canada.
176
00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:50,966
He also told me
that he liked to live in the moment.
177
00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:54,011
That generally meant sloppy make outs
behind the school.
178
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:56,180
[ethereal twinkle]
179
00:09:57,514 --> 00:10:00,725
[interviewer] Is it true he punched a hole
in the moon for you?
180
00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:03,312
- Teleported to the moon and--
- [Ramona] Absolutely.
181
00:10:05,314 --> 00:10:06,606
Yes, he did.
182
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:09,234
- The most romantic thing I've ever seen.
- [tender music plays]
183
00:10:09,318 --> 00:10:11,779
- The most horrifying thing I've ever seen.
- [dramatic music plays]
184
00:10:14,365 --> 00:10:16,283
[munching]
185
00:10:16,367 --> 00:10:17,826
[gentle music playing]
186
00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:18,785
Ramona.
187
00:10:18,869 --> 00:10:20,870
We need to talk about Scott Pilgrim.
188
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:22,122
I'm Scott Pilgrim.
189
00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:24,124
- Ugh. No, I mean--
- [Todd] Mmm.
190
00:10:25,584 --> 00:10:27,544
- Uh, hold that thought.
- Huh?
191
00:10:27,628 --> 00:10:28,504
Wallace.
192
00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:30,046
[Wallace] Co-worker.
193
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:34,092
- [whooshing]
- [ethereal swell]
194
00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:35,093
[bloops]
195
00:10:35,177 --> 00:10:36,136
[Ramona] Ugh!
196
00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:39,556
[infomercial music playing]
197
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:40,974
[narrator] At the end of day two,
198
00:10:41,058 --> 00:10:44,894
the production was
already 17 million dollars over budget,
199
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:47,064
with only three shots in the can.
200
00:10:49,817 --> 00:10:50,859
[music ends]
201
00:10:50,943 --> 00:10:52,569
Today I have a big fight scene,
202
00:10:52,653 --> 00:10:56,281
but I'm really hoping to pull Todd away
from Wallace for a few minutes.
203
00:10:56,365 --> 00:10:57,199
[bloops]
204
00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:00,744
They always seem to be
running lines in his trailer.
205
00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:02,830
You two have incredible chemistry...
206
00:11:03,330 --> 00:11:05,248
[Todd] What's it like working
with Wallace Wells?
207
00:11:05,332 --> 00:11:08,668
[chuckles]
He's taught me so much about acting.
208
00:11:08,752 --> 00:11:10,962
- No. About living.
- [tender music playing]
209
00:11:11,046 --> 00:11:13,757
What can you even say
about a man like that?
210
00:11:13,841 --> 00:11:16,259
[tender music continues]
211
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:17,927
[groaning]
212
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:21,765
- [yelling]
- [whirring]
213
00:11:21,849 --> 00:11:23,684
- Babe?
- Envy!
214
00:11:24,476 --> 00:11:25,769
I can't be with you anymore!
215
00:11:26,478 --> 00:11:28,564
- [chimes]
- I'm in love with Wallace Wells!
216
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,524
- What?
- I...
217
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:33,902
I'm changing! I feel myself changing.
218
00:11:34,486 --> 00:11:35,528
I'm a new person.
219
00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:37,739
- A new boy!
- [Envy grunts, huffs]
220
00:11:37,823 --> 00:11:39,282
[Todd] My skin is clearer!
221
00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:40,534
It's love.
222
00:11:41,076 --> 00:11:42,786
[gasps] Hmm?
223
00:11:44,288 --> 00:11:45,581
She's walking away?
224
00:11:46,582 --> 00:11:48,041
I thought she'd be happy for me.
225
00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:52,003
[interviewer] Ugh, Todd, what happened to
all that "vegans never waver" stuff?
226
00:11:52,087 --> 00:11:55,966
I never said that.
I said, "vegans never wafer."
227
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:59,011
We don't eat wafers. That's true.
228
00:11:59,511 --> 00:12:00,845
They never waver.
229
00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:02,931
- Never waver... Never waver...
- [dramatic music plays]
230
00:12:03,599 --> 00:12:08,687
Look, any rumors about me having
a very hot on-set affair are just rumors.
231
00:12:08,771 --> 00:12:10,314
- I'm-- Hmm?
- [Envy huffs]
232
00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:12,857
Excuse me, I'm talking to the camera here.
233
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:15,443
Tell him what you just told me.
234
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:17,737
[grunting]
235
00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:20,949
I'm... [groans, yells]
236
00:12:21,033 --> 00:12:22,409
[whoosh]
237
00:12:22,493 --> 00:12:24,994
- He's in love with me, isn't he?
- [Todd blubbers]
238
00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:25,912
Well?
239
00:12:25,996 --> 00:12:27,539
[continues blubbering]
240
00:12:27,623 --> 00:12:28,540
Mm-hmm.
241
00:12:29,124 --> 00:12:31,459
- [growls]
- I'll fix this.
242
00:12:31,543 --> 00:12:35,630
Todd, buddy,
this was just an on-set fling.
243
00:12:35,714 --> 00:12:37,257
Huh? What?
244
00:12:37,341 --> 00:12:40,260
When the movie ends,
so does the relationship.
245
00:12:40,344 --> 00:12:41,470
Tale as old as time.
246
00:12:42,054 --> 00:12:44,431
[shakily] You don't love me?
247
00:12:44,932 --> 00:12:47,100
But what about the sparks?
248
00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:49,227
What sparks?
249
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:51,312
- [dramatic music playing]
- [groans]
250
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:52,230
[whoosh]
251
00:12:52,314 --> 00:12:53,148
Todd!
252
00:12:53,232 --> 00:12:54,649
[snapping fingers] Baby! Sweetheart!
253
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:55,859
[inflaming swell]
254
00:12:55,943 --> 00:12:57,235
- [Todd grunts]
- [Envy gasps]
255
00:12:57,319 --> 00:12:59,821
- [Todd continues grunting]
- [Wallace] Huh?
256
00:12:59,905 --> 00:13:01,698
[portal whooshing]
257
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,992
[whirring]
258
00:13:04,910 --> 00:13:08,747
[growls, sighs]
259
00:13:08,831 --> 00:13:10,248
Wallace Wells!
260
00:13:10,332 --> 00:13:12,250
- [Wallace gasps]
- [loud crash]
261
00:13:12,334 --> 00:13:15,211
You broke my boyfriend!
262
00:13:15,295 --> 00:13:18,757
- Prepare to die!
- [Wallace grunting]
263
00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:22,302
- [both grunting]
- [dramatic music playing]
264
00:13:24,346 --> 00:13:26,765
- [Wallace] No fair! [panting]
- [Envy grunts]
265
00:13:26,849 --> 00:13:28,767
- [music halts]
- Stop. Stop it.
266
00:13:28,851 --> 00:13:32,020
[sighs] Jeez, have some dignity.
This is a film set.
267
00:13:32,104 --> 00:13:32,979
[growls]
268
00:13:33,063 --> 00:13:35,523
If you want to fight with me,
fight with them.
269
00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:36,817
[dramatic swell]
270
00:13:37,818 --> 00:13:41,321
- [stunt doubles grunting]
- [whimsical music playing]
271
00:13:41,405 --> 00:13:42,822
[Envy] Four stunt doubles?
272
00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:45,074
They only gave me one!
273
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:46,451
[Wallace] It's in my contract.
274
00:13:46,952 --> 00:13:48,745
- [dramatic sting]
- Get a better lawyer, baby.
275
00:13:48,829 --> 00:13:49,788
[Envy growls]
276
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:53,458
Ramona, time for stunts!
277
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:56,669
- Wait, what? I'm doing an interview--
- Do you want to keep your job?
278
00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:58,630
[swells, chimes]
279
00:13:58,714 --> 00:14:00,215
[interviewer] Where's everybody going?
280
00:14:00,299 --> 00:14:01,508
[camera rattles]
281
00:14:01,592 --> 00:14:05,304
[interviewer panting]
282
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:08,014
- Um...
- [dramatic music playing]
283
00:14:08,098 --> 00:14:11,017
[stunt doubles grunting]
284
00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:12,560
[whooshes]
285
00:14:12,644 --> 00:14:15,522
[announcer] Wallace Wells
versus Envy Adams!
286
00:14:15,606 --> 00:14:17,357
- Fight!
- [bell dings]
287
00:14:17,441 --> 00:14:18,608
[interviewer] Who said that?
288
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:20,193
[announcer] Uh, nobody.
289
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:22,654
What part of the movie is this?
290
00:14:22,738 --> 00:14:24,614
[both grunting]
291
00:14:24,698 --> 00:14:26,074
[Wallace] Don't embarrass me, guys!
292
00:14:26,158 --> 00:14:28,451
[yelling]
293
00:14:28,535 --> 00:14:29,536
[Ramona growls]
294
00:14:29,620 --> 00:14:31,120
Straight Wallace?
295
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:33,331
- You're a stunt double now?
- [grunts]
296
00:14:33,415 --> 00:14:36,709
Why are you acting like that's weird?
You made the exact same career change.
297
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:40,088
- Well, I did it for very specific reasons.
- [groaning]
298
00:14:40,672 --> 00:14:44,259
Fight them! Fight the Wallaces!
If you lose, you're fired.
299
00:14:44,343 --> 00:14:48,471
- [whooshing]
- [grunting]
300
00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:50,974
That's the sloppiest headbutt
I've ever seen.
301
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:53,935
- [grunting]
- [action music playing]
302
00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:56,479
[both grunting]
303
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,982
You call that a backflip? Terrible form!
304
00:14:59,066 --> 00:15:01,735
[both grunting]
305
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:06,114
You give stunts a bad name.
This is tragic. You're all so slow!
306
00:15:06,198 --> 00:15:10,243
[grunting continues]
307
00:15:10,327 --> 00:15:11,494
[Ramona yells]
308
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:14,664
When was the last time you hit the gym?
Too many french fries!
309
00:15:14,748 --> 00:15:16,082
[straight Wallace] Come on, man.
310
00:15:16,166 --> 00:15:17,250
- Huh?
- [music warps]
311
00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:20,921
We can handle physical abuse,
but we draw the line at verbal abuse.
312
00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:24,341
[all crying]
313
00:15:24,967 --> 00:15:25,842
Hey!
314
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:28,970
- [Envy] Well, well, Wells.
- [music resumes]
315
00:15:29,054 --> 00:15:32,181
I guess now it's time
for you to fight your own fight.
316
00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:34,684
But not against me, against Ramona.
317
00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:37,604
- [whoosh]
- Ugh! Okay, time out, cut!
318
00:15:37,688 --> 00:15:38,855
[music stops]
319
00:15:38,939 --> 00:15:41,858
Why does your character want
to fight Wallace in the first place?
320
00:15:41,942 --> 00:15:44,903
[Envy] This isn't for the movie.
This is for real life.
321
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:46,154
[whoosh]
322
00:15:46,238 --> 00:15:47,530
I broke her boyfriend.
323
00:15:47,614 --> 00:15:48,615
[whoosh]
324
00:15:48,699 --> 00:15:50,867
- You and Todd? Hmm.
- [music resumes]
325
00:15:50,951 --> 00:15:53,328
- [whoosh]
- [growls]
326
00:15:54,663 --> 00:15:57,374
- No more stunts. Where is he?
- [music builds, halts]
327
00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:03,213
[Ramona] Todd, we need to talk.
328
00:16:05,716 --> 00:16:06,758
- [Envy gasps]
- [Ramona] Ugh!
329
00:16:08,510 --> 00:16:09,761
[Envy] Oh, Todd.
330
00:16:09,845 --> 00:16:11,805
Breaking vegan edge?
331
00:16:12,556 --> 00:16:14,766
[exhales] Step inside.
332
00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:23,149
Welcome to my crib.
Let me give you a quick tour.
333
00:16:23,233 --> 00:16:25,360
[hip-hop music playing]
334
00:16:25,444 --> 00:16:28,613
Over there is the first place
I made out with Wallace.
335
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:30,031
- [harp glissando]
- [Todd sighs]
336
00:16:30,115 --> 00:16:33,577
This is the second place
I made out with Wallace.
337
00:16:34,536 --> 00:16:37,288
- And this is the third place where I--
- [harp glissando]
338
00:16:37,372 --> 00:16:39,123
Nobody needs this information, Todd.
339
00:16:39,207 --> 00:16:40,583
Yeah, I... I think we're good.
340
00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:43,002
[Todd] This trailer holds
so many memories.
341
00:16:43,086 --> 00:16:46,798
It's, uh, where I fell in love
for the first time.
342
00:16:46,882 --> 00:16:48,258
The first time?
343
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:53,346
Envy, what we had was fun,
but I discovered a new kind of fun.
344
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:57,100
The kind of fun
where you care about another person.
345
00:16:57,934 --> 00:16:59,227
You wouldn't understand.
346
00:17:00,103 --> 00:17:01,562
What about us?
347
00:17:01,646 --> 00:17:04,941
You've known him for three [bleep] days!
348
00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:06,359
Is that all it's been?
349
00:17:06,443 --> 00:17:08,736
Even if it had just been two days,
350
00:17:08,820 --> 00:17:11,155
I'd be chasing that high
for the rest of my life.
351
00:17:11,239 --> 00:17:13,450
- You can't fight the moonlight, babe.
- [Envy] Huh?
352
00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:16,453
- [enchanted swell]
- [horn blows]
353
00:17:17,245 --> 00:17:19,747
All right, I'm too famous
for this conversation.
354
00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:21,165
We're done. Goodbye.
355
00:17:21,249 --> 00:17:22,417
- Hold on.
- [Envy] Hmm?
356
00:17:23,001 --> 00:17:24,836
We need to talk about Scott Pilgrim.
357
00:17:25,337 --> 00:17:26,546
I'm Scott Pilgrim.
358
00:17:26,630 --> 00:17:29,132
No, the real Scott Pilgrim.
359
00:17:29,216 --> 00:17:31,760
The guy you kidnapped
using a vegan portal.
360
00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:37,974
[VCR whirring]
361
00:17:38,058 --> 00:17:38,892
Here.
362
00:17:41,269 --> 00:17:44,230
I don't know if you did this alone,
or if Envy put you up to it.
363
00:17:44,314 --> 00:17:46,191
No one puts me up to anything.
364
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:48,443
Only I put me up to things.
365
00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:50,778
It's a vegan portal, all right.
366
00:17:50,862 --> 00:17:53,740
But it's better than anything
Todd's ever made.
367
00:17:53,824 --> 00:17:56,409
I mean, look at
the thought that went into it,
368
00:17:56,493 --> 00:17:57,869
the craftsmanship.
369
00:17:57,953 --> 00:17:59,538
Todd didn't do this.
370
00:18:00,038 --> 00:18:02,165
- [Todd] That was rude...
- [whirring, chiming]
371
00:18:02,249 --> 00:18:03,416
...but I'll allow it.
372
00:18:04,459 --> 00:18:05,293
[whoosh]
373
00:18:05,377 --> 00:18:08,046
You spent three days following my orders
374
00:18:08,130 --> 00:18:10,882
because you wanted
to show Todd a video of a portal?
375
00:18:10,966 --> 00:18:12,633
You have no other leads?
376
00:18:12,717 --> 00:18:13,843
Tragic.
377
00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:15,470
Looks like you're never gonna find him.
378
00:18:15,554 --> 00:18:17,346
- [toilet flushing]
- Maybe you should give up.
379
00:18:17,430 --> 00:18:20,224
Sometimes you just need
to leave losers in the past.
380
00:18:20,308 --> 00:18:21,392
[whoosh]
381
00:18:21,476 --> 00:18:23,478
Are you talking about Scott or me?
382
00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:28,024
[sighs]
383
00:18:30,110 --> 00:18:32,361
And by the way, you're fired.
384
00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:33,488
I quit.
385
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:40,120
[stunt doubles crying]
386
00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:42,288
[Ramona sighs]
387
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:44,624
[helicopter blades whirring]
388
00:18:44,708 --> 00:18:46,376
[grunts, sighs]
389
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:53,842
- [ "Sharp Dressed Man" by ZZ Top playing]
- [all] Huh?
390
00:19:06,062 --> 00:19:08,940
Uh, Mr. Patel,
welcome to the Great White North.
391
00:19:09,024 --> 00:19:12,443
Yeah, yeah, it's great.
Everyone here works for me, right?
392
00:19:12,527 --> 00:19:14,196
- Yes, sir!
- Good!
393
00:19:14,696 --> 00:19:15,530
[grunts]
394
00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:18,574
Ha! You're all fired!
395
00:19:18,658 --> 00:19:20,201
[man] Sir, did... did you just say--
396
00:19:20,285 --> 00:19:21,703
Shut up! Guards!
397
00:19:22,621 --> 00:19:23,788
[yells]
398
00:19:25,081 --> 00:19:26,625
Hey, you! You over there.
399
00:19:27,751 --> 00:19:29,877
- Aren't you the director?
- Yes!
400
00:19:29,961 --> 00:19:31,379
- [Matthew] You're fired!
- No!
401
00:19:31,463 --> 00:19:33,256
- [loud bang]
- [coins jingle]
402
00:19:33,882 --> 00:19:36,634
What? Are you shooting
a documentary or something?
403
00:19:36,718 --> 00:19:38,553
- [man] Yeah, uh-huh.
- [squeaks]
404
00:19:38,637 --> 00:19:40,513
Huh. Well, not anymore.
405
00:19:40,597 --> 00:19:42,766
- [man] Hey, man. Get off me, man. Stop.
- [camera beeps]
406
00:19:46,394 --> 00:19:49,147
[interviewer] Well, that was a waste
of our precious little time.
407
00:19:49,648 --> 00:19:52,108
All those people are cuckoo crazy.
All of them are.
408
00:19:53,193 --> 00:19:55,319
All of you, go home. Take off!
409
00:19:55,403 --> 00:19:57,364
Oh, we don't work for you.
410
00:19:58,156 --> 00:20:01,701
We just want a moment of your time.
We have an exciting opportunity.
411
00:20:01,785 --> 00:20:07,123
[Knives] If you give us a chance,
we will blow your mind!
412
00:20:07,207 --> 00:20:08,291
Hmm.
413
00:20:08,375 --> 00:20:12,254
I like your moxie, kids.
I have 30 seconds available next Tuesday.
414
00:20:14,130 --> 00:20:15,632
- [card thuds]
- [both gasp]
415
00:20:16,508 --> 00:20:18,718
Call my girls. Let's make this happen.
416
00:20:19,219 --> 00:20:22,388
[Knives and Stephen squealing excitedly]
417
00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:23,890
- [Ramona] Matthew Patel.
- Whoa.
418
00:20:23,974 --> 00:20:25,141
[dramatic music plays]
419
00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:27,644
[Matthew] Ramona Flowers.
420
00:20:28,311 --> 00:20:30,772
What's with the outfit? Are you a CEO?
421
00:20:31,273 --> 00:20:33,900
Actually, yes.
I'm here to shut this movie down.
422
00:20:33,984 --> 00:20:37,779
I guess that was inevitable.
It's probably losing you a lot of money.
423
00:20:38,363 --> 00:20:41,157
Money? Who cares about money?
424
00:20:41,241 --> 00:20:42,742
Have you read the script?
425
00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:46,913
It's a character assassination of me,
Matthew Patel!
426
00:20:46,997 --> 00:20:50,917
I won that fight!
I punched Scott Pilgrim to death!
427
00:20:51,001 --> 00:20:53,669
Well, you didn't
actually punch him to death.
428
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,214
Someone kidnapped him
and made it look like you won.
429
00:20:56,298 --> 00:20:57,132
Huh?
430
00:20:58,258 --> 00:21:00,051
- I didn't win?
- [Ramona] No.
431
00:21:00,677 --> 00:21:02,429
- He's not dead?
- [Ramona] No.
432
00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:05,640
- [Matthew] Is he mad at me?
- I don't know, dude.
433
00:21:05,724 --> 00:21:08,018
I'm trying to find him
and figure out who did this.
434
00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:12,271
But you know I took my new-found
confidence from killing Scott Pilgrim
435
00:21:12,355 --> 00:21:14,440
and went back and defeated Gideon, right?
436
00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:15,442
I'm sorry?
437
00:21:16,026 --> 00:21:18,361
[Matthew] I went up against Gideon
and won it all.
438
00:21:18,445 --> 00:21:23,282
Two record labels, this movie studio,
14 animal shelters,
439
00:21:23,366 --> 00:21:25,243
and The League of Evil Exes.
440
00:21:25,869 --> 00:21:29,580
The empire's mine, and I plan to keep it.
441
00:21:29,664 --> 00:21:33,543
I won't make the same mistakes he made.
I won't end up where he is now.
442
00:21:34,169 --> 00:21:35,920
Which is where exactly?
443
00:21:36,004 --> 00:21:37,713
[Matthew] Here, Toronto.
444
00:21:37,797 --> 00:21:40,424
He's shacking up with some girl
named Julie-something.
445
00:21:40,508 --> 00:21:42,885
Did you know
Gideon isn't even his real name?
446
00:21:42,969 --> 00:21:44,262
It's not?
447
00:21:44,346 --> 00:21:47,473
No, it's Gordon. Gordon Goose.
448
00:21:47,557 --> 00:21:48,391
What?
449
00:21:48,475 --> 00:21:51,186
[Matthew] Everything we knew
about that guy was a lie.
450
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:55,731
This Julie, it wouldn't be Julie Powers?
451
00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:58,192
Yeah, that's it. You know her?
452
00:21:58,276 --> 00:21:59,444
I thought I did.
453
00:22:07,327 --> 00:22:08,286
[sighs]
454
00:22:13,583 --> 00:22:17,503
- [Matthew] Where are you going?
- [Ramona] Julie Powers and I need to talk.
455
00:22:17,587 --> 00:22:18,880
[rollerblades rattling]
456
00:22:22,300 --> 00:22:23,259
[whizzing]
457
00:22:27,347 --> 00:22:30,767
[dramatic music playing]
458
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:41,319
[music fades]
459
00:22:42,404 --> 00:22:45,281
["If You Could Read My Mind" by
Ultra Naté, Amber, Jocelyn Enriquez plays]
460
00:22:45,365 --> 00:22:48,242
♪ If you could read my mind, love ♪
461
00:22:48,326 --> 00:22:51,538
♪ What a tale my thoughts would tell ♪
462
00:22:52,330 --> 00:22:59,170
♪ Just like an old time movie
'Bout a ghost from a wishing well ♪
463
00:22:59,754 --> 00:23:04,300
♪ In a castle dark or a fortress strong ♪
464
00:23:04,384 --> 00:23:07,345
♪ With chains upon my feet ♪
465
00:23:08,096 --> 00:23:11,015
♪ You know that ghost is me ♪
466
00:23:12,434 --> 00:23:15,686
♪ I don't know where we went wrong ♪
467
00:23:15,770 --> 00:23:20,316
♪ But the feeling's gone
And I just can't get it back ♪
468
00:23:24,737 --> 00:23:28,115
♪ If you could read my mind, yeah ♪
469
00:23:28,199 --> 00:23:31,744
♪ If you could read my mind, love ♪
470
00:23:31,828 --> 00:23:35,206
♪ What a tale my thoughts would tell ♪
471
00:23:35,748 --> 00:23:42,422
♪ Just like a paperback novel
The kind that drugstores sell ♪
472
00:23:43,173 --> 00:23:47,802
♪ When you reach the part
Where the heartache comes ♪
473
00:23:47,886 --> 00:23:50,805
♪ The hero would be you ♪
474
00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:54,559
♪ Heroes often fail ♪
475
00:23:55,894 --> 00:23:59,146
♪ Never thought I could feel this way ♪
476
00:23:59,230 --> 00:24:03,359
♪ And I've got to say
That I just don't get it ♪
477
00:24:03,443 --> 00:24:06,695
♪ I don't know where we went wrong ♪
478
00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:11,242
♪ But the feeling's gone
And I just can't get it back ♪
479
00:24:11,326 --> 00:24:12,410
[song fades]