1 00:00:11,219 --> 00:00:14,097 《厚片女孩的生存之道》 2 00:00:20,103 --> 00:00:23,398 這顆肉丸怎麼能這麼多汁,太神了 3 00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:26,818 -謝謝 -你是第一個這樣問我的女人 4 00:00:26,901 --> 00:00:29,070 你知道有老公最棒的是什麼嗎? 5 00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:30,989 就是有個老公 6 00:00:35,493 --> 00:00:39,080 怎麼有一堆潔德在照相亭 跟人親嘴的照片? 7 00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:40,290 她就騷啊 8 00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:43,001 她說是遺傳自她曾曾曾曾曾祖母 9 00:00:43,084 --> 00:00:44,919 是家族淵源 10 00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:47,088 但看起來大家都玩得… 11 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,383 你還是沒跟他說話? 12 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:54,804 沒有,已經過了163小時 我還沒跟他說話 13 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,264 我也不想跟他說話 14 00:00:56,347 --> 00:00:58,558 但瞞著你是我的主意 15 00:00:58,641 --> 00:00:59,893 你也沒對我發火 16 00:00:59,976 --> 00:01:02,604 對,但你是在保護我,而他… 17 00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:03,521 他怎樣? 18 00:01:03,605 --> 00:01:05,899 他傷了我的心,掃了我的興 19 00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:10,862 我是說 20 00:01:11,780 --> 00:01:12,822 我很想他 21 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,367 真的,我想念他每天會傳自拍給我 22 00:01:16,451 --> 00:01:18,119 然後叫我馬上刪掉 23 00:01:18,203 --> 00:01:20,121 「因為政府可能在監視」 24 00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:23,833 或什麼「雲端外洩風險」 我連雲端是啥都不懂 25 00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,044 但我還是生他的氣 26 00:01:26,544 --> 00:01:28,838 你們以前也吵過架 27 00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:29,798 對 28 00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:31,966 但這次不一樣 29 00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:35,261 -你怕跟他對話? -我才不怕跟他說話 30 00:01:35,345 --> 00:01:36,387 我… 31 00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:39,891 我只是覺得現在很脆弱 32 00:01:39,974 --> 00:01:43,812 我們吵架之後,把話說開了會怎樣? 33 00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:45,230 感情會更好 34 00:01:45,730 --> 00:01:48,733 那麼,我漂亮的老婆 35 00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:50,568 也許你該跟他談談 36 00:01:53,863 --> 00:01:56,366 你是用快問快答逼我就範嗎? 37 00:01:56,449 --> 00:02:00,245 討厭!我最氣你說得有道理了 38 00:02:00,328 --> 00:02:03,414 但我也很愛當你老婆,這好矛盾 39 00:02:15,009 --> 00:02:16,094 謝謝你來 40 00:02:17,345 --> 00:02:19,305 我買了東西給你 41 00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:22,183 給腳用的 42 00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:25,645 可以緩解孕吐,讓你放鬆 43 00:02:25,728 --> 00:02:27,313 這是薰衣草精油 44 00:02:27,397 --> 00:02:29,899 你喜歡薰衣草嗎?這是滾珠瓶 45 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,694 睡前塗在耳後,就能… 46 00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:34,028 你怎麼知道這些? 47 00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:37,240 因為我有朋友 而且老子也會看書,好嗎? 48 00:02:37,323 --> 00:02:39,200 好啦,問一下而已 49 00:02:40,785 --> 00:02:41,870 謝謝 50 00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:43,496 聽我說 51 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,916 我想參與 52 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:51,296 我知道這是你的身體 我都懂,你說得對 53 00:02:51,379 --> 00:02:55,049 那是你的,裡面有我的一部分 但身體是你的 54 00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:58,469 我可不像尼力那種懶鬼 55 00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:02,182 半夜換尿布什麼的 我對育兒瑣事完全沒問題 56 00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:05,226 孩子需要什麼,我就給什麼 57 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:09,856 好嗎?如果你希望我在場 我很樂意陪伴,我是認真的 58 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,526 我本來打算去紐澤西中部生小孩 59 00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:16,029 我阿姨她們已經有一套系統 60 00:03:16,112 --> 00:03:20,283 隨時都會有人幫我、照顧我們 61 00:03:20,366 --> 00:03:23,453 我們相信群體力量,我的社區就緒了 62 00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:25,622 謝謝 63 00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:27,624 你是說「公社」? 64 00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:30,627 三代同堂,共用一個帳戶 65 00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:33,504 -隨便你怎麼叫 -那就叫公社 66 00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:35,131 是公共社區 67 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:37,550 字面上就是這個意思 68 00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:39,427 -你是這樣拆字的 -所以… 69 00:03:39,510 --> 00:03:42,722 總之,這就是我的計畫 70 00:03:42,805 --> 00:03:45,850 因為我知道我一個人辦不到 71 00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:48,102 你的計畫呢? 72 00:03:48,186 --> 00:03:51,439 我沒有單一個計畫 73 00:03:51,522 --> 00:03:52,690 我有很多計畫 74 00:03:53,274 --> 00:03:54,400 多到數不清 75 00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:57,820 我的計畫多到滿出來了 76 00:03:57,904 --> 00:04:01,699 計畫就是這麼多 不管是公社還是社區,我都包了 77 00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:03,409 -好喔,卡利歐 -對 78 00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:05,411 我相信你,太棒了 79 00:04:06,537 --> 00:04:08,039 希望改天能見識 80 00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:11,542 好 81 00:04:15,171 --> 00:04:16,547 卡利歐,你在嗎? 82 00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:19,092 如果你在廁所,就喊一聲「廁所」 83 00:04:21,844 --> 00:04:24,514 如果你還在氣我,也可以直接講 84 00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:31,771 -嘿 -嘿 85 00:04:31,854 --> 00:04:33,564 -嘿,等等,喂? -喂? 86 00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:37,944 我聽不到,你怎麼聽起來 像在鬧鬼的潛水艇裡? 87 00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:52,166 真尷尬 88 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:53,209 是啊 89 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:02,468 我帶了… 90 00:05:03,261 --> 00:05:05,555 黑人品牌的衛生紙,因為… 91 00:05:05,638 --> 00:05:07,390 -你知道我需要 -對 92 00:05:07,473 --> 00:05:09,058 謝謝,兩層的? 93 00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:10,643 你的管線會堵塞啦 94 00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:21,321 我知道我們在婚禮上 都說了很傷人的話 95 00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,489 我當時被踩到痛處了 96 00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:27,618 我很希望我們沒說那些話 97 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:28,995 我很討厭那樣 98 00:05:29,078 --> 00:05:30,705 我也很討厭那樣 99 00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:34,250 爛死了 100 00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:35,877 就像… 101 00:05:37,670 --> 00:05:40,840 我看著你這一年來為了懷孕吃盡苦頭 102 00:05:40,923 --> 00:05:44,927 而我成年後一直在逃避這件事 然後…就這樣中了 103 00:05:46,929 --> 00:05:48,681 老天爺真是混蛋 104 00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:50,141 還用你說 105 00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:53,227 我不該說那很瞎、毀了我的人生 106 00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:54,604 我不該對你講那些 107 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:57,690 我知道你有多想要孩子 108 00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:00,860 梅菲絲,對不起 109 00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:02,779 謝謝你… 110 00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:04,822 這麼說 111 00:06:05,948 --> 00:06:09,952 我一直在想 「為什麼這件事讓我這麼受傷?」 112 00:06:10,036 --> 00:06:13,581 「為什麼我那麼生氣?」 113 00:06:13,664 --> 00:06:16,334 氣得要命 114 00:06:16,417 --> 00:06:19,504 這是因為我很嫉妒 115 00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:22,715 我嫉妒你 116 00:06:22,799 --> 00:06:26,803 你能體驗我渴望已久的事 117 00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,679 但我不想嫉妒 118 00:06:29,347 --> 00:06:33,476 我想為你開心,我會為你開心,真的 119 00:06:44,487 --> 00:06:46,364 這真的是很瘋… 120 00:06:49,033 --> 00:06:51,494 我們人生的變化也太誇張了 121 00:06:51,577 --> 00:06:53,162 天啊,沒錯 122 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:56,791 -你結婚了,而我要當爸了 -什麼鬼? 123 00:06:57,458 --> 00:06:58,960 我們一起轉大人了 124 00:07:00,002 --> 00:07:02,046 我們都是大人了,怎麼還在轉大人? 125 00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:05,758 聽好,不管怎樣 我都會在你的生命裡 126 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:07,343 也會在你孩子的生命裡 127 00:07:08,594 --> 00:07:10,096 我們是家人 128 00:07:11,013 --> 00:07:11,848 好嗎? 129 00:07:13,015 --> 00:07:13,933 好 130 00:07:15,059 --> 00:07:16,853 我很需要聽到這句 131 00:07:16,936 --> 00:07:19,105 你還要找人來檢查鉛含量 132 00:07:19,188 --> 00:07:20,940 這種地方要怎麼養小孩? 133 00:07:21,023 --> 00:07:22,358 這是鄉村風 134 00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:26,446 這超過鄉村風的極限了 你也該認清這個現實 135 00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:32,785 (三週後) 136 00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:37,832 綠卡面試不能親嘴,分開坐 137 00:07:37,915 --> 00:07:39,876 這樣太刻意了 138 00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:40,793 而且 139 00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:42,253 很噁心 140 00:07:42,336 --> 00:07:44,672 愛才不噁心,到底誰傷了你? 141 00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:46,466 別扯到我,別偷換話題 142 00:07:46,549 --> 00:07:47,467 -好嗎? -好 143 00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:49,260 確認一下,你叫什麼名字? 144 00:07:49,343 --> 00:07:51,929 梅菲絲「狠角色」波蒙,好嗎? 145 00:07:52,013 --> 00:07:54,557 -那你呢,老兄? -路卡貝拉達 146 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:56,017 狠角色的老公 147 00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,729 第一題,誰會搶被子? 148 00:07:59,812 --> 00:08:01,063 他 149 00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:01,981 我 150 00:08:02,064 --> 00:08:04,317 他搶被子真的很誇張 151 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,319 整個人像烤雞轉來轉去,很扯 152 00:08:06,402 --> 00:08:07,236 解釋一下 153 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,362 我的腳會冷 154 00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:11,449 -那你幹嘛不穿我織的襪子? -穿了又太熱 155 00:08:11,532 --> 00:08:14,368 -那你的腳就會冷 -那襪子做透氣一點 156 00:08:14,452 --> 00:08:16,704 說得好,對啊 157 00:08:16,787 --> 00:08:18,664 還不錯,可以 158 00:08:18,748 --> 00:08:22,710 -你睡床的哪一邊? -她說哪邊是她的,我就睡哪邊 159 00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:25,630 我是女人,我可以改變主意 160 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:27,215 你好嗎? 161 00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:29,258 -在學溫蒂威廉斯 -沒錯 162 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,844 可以,但移民官不吃這套 163 00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,514 -但我得說,感覺很真實 -對 164 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:36,516 那麼,下一題 165 00:08:36,599 --> 00:08:38,643 -我們表現超好的,寶貝 -對 166 00:08:38,726 --> 00:08:40,978 小孩這題可以跳過,不一定要… 167 00:08:41,062 --> 00:08:43,231 我們答得超好,就問吧 168 00:08:43,314 --> 00:08:45,900 就是…你們有想過要孩子嗎? 169 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:48,444 你們覺得未來會怎樣?就這樣 170 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,196 -我們不用… -這簡單 171 00:08:50,279 --> 00:08:53,950 我們當然想要小孩,也一直在努力 172 00:08:56,118 --> 00:08:57,787 我… 173 00:08:58,496 --> 00:09:00,039 我不知道 174 00:09:01,707 --> 00:09:02,792 我覺得不是了 175 00:09:02,875 --> 00:09:04,252 你不想生了? 176 00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:07,713 我們努力很久了,還是沒結果 177 00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:12,218 我真的很累 每天卡在不上不下的情緒裡 178 00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:16,472 我想活得輕盈一點、快樂一點 179 00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:20,268 不想再被焦慮綁架了 你懂嗎?所以… 180 00:09:20,768 --> 00:09:22,645 我想…我不想再試了 181 00:09:22,728 --> 00:09:24,981 好,但你為什麼不告訴我? 182 00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:27,275 我也是剛剛才明白 183 00:09:27,358 --> 00:09:29,527 這種事我們應該要討論 184 00:09:29,610 --> 00:09:31,195 現在就在討論了啊 185 00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:34,824 -我們是在面試的時候聊 -這不是真的面試 186 00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:35,783 也是啦 187 00:09:35,866 --> 00:09:37,660 但這是真的對話 188 00:09:37,743 --> 00:09:38,661 這也沒錯 189 00:09:39,161 --> 00:09:40,246 好吧 190 00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:41,163 嘿 191 00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:44,000 小梅,對不起,我不是… 192 00:09:45,167 --> 00:09:47,962 -我不該問這些蠢問題 -這不蠢 193 00:09:48,045 --> 00:09:49,880 這是很好的問題 194 00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:54,552 面對深愛的人 我不能逃避那些沉重的對話 195 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:58,139 把真心話說出來,感覺很好 196 00:09:58,639 --> 00:10:00,224 手給我,貝拉達 197 00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:07,273 很難不玩「我有一個夢」的哏 198 00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,357 太夢幻了! 199 00:10:12,111 --> 00:10:14,405 (三個月後) 200 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:18,451 天啊,這配色也太好看 別丟烘衣機,會縮水 201 00:10:18,534 --> 00:10:21,037 姐妹,這件好可愛 202 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:23,956 能塞進去,我一定帶走 203 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,750 -就這樣 -這才像話 204 00:10:25,833 --> 00:10:28,085 我能幫你修版型,屁股線條直接升級 205 00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:29,003 謝啦,姐妹 206 00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:32,423 我的天,這系列真的太完整了 207 00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:35,843 版型超搭,超有對話感 208 00:10:35,926 --> 00:10:37,720 還有這個橘色! 209 00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:40,681 你偷吃我的藥嗎?專注成這樣 210 00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:44,310 沒有,我只是決定不再把精力 浪費在控制不了的事情上 211 00:10:44,393 --> 00:10:48,022 再說,《精華》的封面派對快到了 沒空理會負能量 212 00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:49,190 老實說,我懂 213 00:10:49,273 --> 00:10:52,068 我刪掉一個交友軟體 背部痘痘全好了 214 00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:55,029 這故事很有意思,這… 215 00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:57,365 幾乎是同一件事 216 00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:00,868 各位,我想出牛仔哈倫褲的穿法了 217 00:11:00,951 --> 00:11:02,286 我好興奮 218 00:11:02,370 --> 00:11:05,122 只要選淺色牛仔布和高腰設計就好 219 00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:06,749 搞定! 220 00:11:07,249 --> 00:11:09,669 我現在火力全開,衝啦! 221 00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:11,045 你完全進入狀態了 222 00:11:11,128 --> 00:11:13,255 我穿流蘇的時候會變一個人 223 00:11:15,424 --> 00:11:16,842 (換尿布比賽) 224 00:11:20,971 --> 00:11:22,014 (寶寶派對) 225 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:23,766 歡迎! 226 00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:26,102 有人去梅西百貨喔,我看得出來 227 00:11:27,061 --> 00:11:28,646 -嘿,小梅 -嘿! 228 00:11:30,314 --> 00:11:31,273 巴寶莉味太重? 229 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,817 一點也不會 230 00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:35,903 很像戴妃的雨傘被邀去家庭烤肉 231 00:11:35,986 --> 00:11:39,156 這形容也太具體 我腦袋洗不掉了,我想搭一下 232 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,243 我要去補餐點、重開遊戲 233 00:11:42,326 --> 00:11:43,661 還要檢查播放清單 234 00:11:43,744 --> 00:11:45,705 八成連到路卡的帳號了 235 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,290 沒人需要聽那麼多安立奎的歌 236 00:11:48,374 --> 00:11:51,043 趁我還沒忘,我也有禮物給你 237 00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:54,255 -有禮物給我?什麼? -對!好 238 00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:58,259 這是你的潮爸帽 你現在是負責任的潮爸 239 00:11:58,342 --> 00:12:00,511 謝謝,真的謝謝你 240 00:12:00,594 --> 00:12:01,721 不客氣 241 00:12:01,804 --> 00:12:04,098 這活動很好玩,但也很重要 242 00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:06,058 我們是來幫你的,因為… 243 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:08,436 你要在鉛筆盒大的房子養可愛的寶寶 244 00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:11,355 而且你家只有一支叉子 還是裝飾用的 245 00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:13,232 我幫你補進清單了 246 00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:15,651 其實,我要搬家了 247 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:17,570 -什麼? -什麼? 248 00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:21,365 你要搬家?搬出你現在住的地方? 249 00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:23,784 同一棟,只是搬到走廊另一邊 250 00:12:24,493 --> 00:12:25,619 兩房的 251 00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:26,746 -什麼? -什麼? 252 00:12:26,829 --> 00:12:28,748 兩房? 253 00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:30,750 你是億萬富翁喔?太扯了 254 00:12:30,833 --> 00:12:33,377 好吧,約翰傳奇 那麼多空間要幹嘛? 255 00:12:33,461 --> 00:12:34,295 我還不知道 256 00:12:34,378 --> 00:12:37,882 老實說,我只是覺得 該升級一下生活了 257 00:12:37,965 --> 00:12:39,759 -天啊 -好吧,怎麼了? 258 00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:42,094 我媽把伊曼妮攔住了,我得… 259 00:12:42,178 --> 00:12:44,013 -嘿,愛你 -我也愛你 260 00:12:44,096 --> 00:12:45,681 -過來 -嘿 261 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:47,391 遊戲不是這樣玩的 262 00:12:47,892 --> 00:12:49,393 要猜尿布裡是什麼 263 00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:51,854 這才叫真正的食物 264 00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:54,690 我覺得真正的食物要自己親手做 265 00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,901 我打算這樣做給寶寶吃 266 00:12:56,984 --> 00:12:58,277 那種東西就免了 267 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:02,573 我孫子出生後 你還要在街角賣餅乾嗎? 268 00:13:06,076 --> 00:13:10,289 如果你口中的賣餅乾 是指經營外燴公司 269 00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:12,958 那麼,對啊,總要有人繳帳單 270 00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:15,002 孩子的爸忙著養奶奶呢 271 00:13:15,085 --> 00:13:17,963 誰叫她不知道工作是什麼 272 00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:30,810 這裡發生什麼事了? 273 00:13:30,893 --> 00:13:32,520 伊曼妮剛才告訴我 274 00:13:32,603 --> 00:13:35,231 我的寶貝孫子會餓著長大 275 00:13:35,314 --> 00:13:37,858 然後把我電得體無完膚 276 00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:40,319 -伊曼妮? -這是真的 277 00:13:40,402 --> 00:13:43,572 好了,是我活該,真的活該 278 00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,533 但她還說了一件事 279 00:13:45,616 --> 00:13:49,829 她說每隔一個月 我可以帶孫子,讓你們喘口氣 280 00:13:50,454 --> 00:13:51,747 她絕對沒說那種話 281 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:53,457 我真的沒說 282 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:55,459 但我可以 283 00:13:57,002 --> 00:13:57,878 那也不錯 284 00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,129 對啊 285 00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:01,632 確實不錯 286 00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:05,803 媽,你在…你在幹嘛? 287 00:14:05,886 --> 00:14:07,638 怎麼了?這是薄荷菸 288 00:14:07,721 --> 00:14:09,807 她懷孕了,我們又在室內 289 00:14:10,391 --> 00:14:11,642 這不是1970年代 290 00:14:13,894 --> 00:14:15,938 糟糕,太多了 291 00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:18,232 -嘿,姐妹 -嘿 292 00:14:18,732 --> 00:14:20,109 還好嗎? 293 00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:22,027 我很好 294 00:14:22,111 --> 00:14:22,945 好 295 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:25,573 打從我一進來,你就沒停下來過 296 00:14:25,656 --> 00:14:26,949 我就是這樣 297 00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:30,870 我想確保一切都很完美 因為寶寶真的… 298 00:14:30,953 --> 00:14:32,288 他們能感應氣氛 299 00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:34,707 他們喜歡好的氛圍,這就是我想給的 300 00:14:34,790 --> 00:14:37,418 也許你想坐一下? 301 00:14:37,501 --> 00:14:38,419 你該休息一下 302 00:14:38,502 --> 00:14:40,254 哈,你講話跟卡利歐一樣 303 00:14:40,337 --> 00:14:44,133 他總是說:「小梅 要對自己好一點」 304 00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:47,511 「懂嗎,小梅?」真想叫他閉嘴 305 00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:51,140 天啊,你還好嗎? 是鷹嘴豆泥裡的蒜頭嗎? 306 00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,893 我就東尼叫不要放那麼多蒜頭 307 00:14:53,976 --> 00:14:55,644 不是,是他踢太用力 308 00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:57,813 好,那就好 309 00:14:57,897 --> 00:15:00,274 他應該喜歡你叫他爸閉嘴 310 00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:02,693 這寶寶很有個性 311 00:15:04,361 --> 00:15:05,362 要摸摸看嗎? 312 00:15:07,823 --> 00:15:09,867 好啊 313 00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:11,744 好 314 00:15:12,369 --> 00:15:13,537 閉嘴,卡利歐 315 00:15:14,455 --> 00:15:15,414 我不知道 316 00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:17,666 閉嘴,卡利歐 317 00:15:18,876 --> 00:15:22,379 我的天啊! 318 00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:24,256 給我閉嘴,卡利歐 319 00:15:24,340 --> 00:15:26,592 我根本沒說話!拜託 320 00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,303 給我閉嘴,卡利歐 321 00:15:33,265 --> 00:15:35,309 哈囉,小傢伙 322 00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,187 我已經愛上你了 323 00:15:39,813 --> 00:15:40,940 好想見到你 324 00:15:45,319 --> 00:15:47,655 老實說,我很清楚我想當媽 325 00:15:47,738 --> 00:15:49,615 這是我要的,我想當媽 326 00:15:49,698 --> 00:15:51,075 但我也很清楚 327 00:15:51,158 --> 00:15:54,828 我不想再讓身體受這種罪 328 00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:56,705 我真的不想 329 00:15:56,789 --> 00:16:00,209 梅菲絲,有幾個選項我可以帶你了解 330 00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:03,379 請把所有選項都告訴我,我需要知道 331 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:06,256 我正要說,你就… 332 00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:11,720 我不是故意打斷你 但我真的很想知道,所以拜託 333 00:16:12,304 --> 00:16:13,138 請告訴我 334 00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:20,354 我們有一些選擇可以探討 335 00:16:20,437 --> 00:16:22,272 泰瑞醫生,拜託! 336 00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:24,942 你能不能告訴我有哪些選擇? 337 00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:28,612 我得老實說,你很囉嗦 338 00:16:28,696 --> 00:16:30,781 繞老半天才講重點 339 00:16:30,864 --> 00:16:32,992 我就一直在想,泰瑞醫生 340 00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:36,662 什麼時候才會講到 你一直說的選擇和方案? 341 00:16:36,745 --> 00:16:39,498 我們在說話的時候 我的卵子都快乾掉了 342 00:16:39,581 --> 00:16:42,418 你能閉嘴,讓我說話嗎? 343 00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:43,752 天啊! 344 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:46,588 我已經盡量保持禮貌了 345 00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,966 但你讓我很難好好說話 346 00:16:49,049 --> 00:16:52,594 因為等你讓我說完一句話 我都退休了 347 00:16:53,095 --> 00:16:54,471 重點是那個「休」 348 00:16:54,972 --> 00:16:57,099 -天啊 -我很害怕 349 00:16:57,599 --> 00:17:00,352 害怕沒有關係 350 00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:05,691 其實,害怕是合理的 351 00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:09,069 我覺得 352 00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:12,948 生小孩是女人最自然的事 353 00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:17,411 但對我來說,卻是最難做到的事 354 00:17:17,494 --> 00:17:19,455 這很不公平 355 00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:23,250 因為我大半輩子都在想辦法避孕 356 00:17:24,043 --> 00:17:27,337 吃避孕藥、用保險套、插其他地方 357 00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:31,091 抱歉,我以為這裡可以暢所欲言 358 00:17:31,175 --> 00:17:34,219 我是生育科醫師,不是心理治療師 359 00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,181 不過,梅菲絲 360 00:17:37,681 --> 00:17:39,600 你在這裡可以放心說 361 00:17:40,601 --> 00:17:43,103 好,因為我很需要 362 00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:45,230 知道嗎? 363 00:17:45,314 --> 00:17:50,444 因為如果我們真的要談 我無法懷孕的事 364 00:17:50,944 --> 00:17:52,279 那麼 365 00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:57,576 那些情緒,我們要怎麼去談? 366 00:17:57,659 --> 00:18:00,204 我會不會覺得自己… 367 00:18:02,247 --> 00:18:03,582 不夠格當媽? 368 00:18:04,083 --> 00:18:08,170 或是覺得自己不像個女人?或是… 369 00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:11,006 有很多事情你不會想到 370 00:18:11,548 --> 00:18:12,925 像是生孩子的故事 371 00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:17,179 我都不知道這是大家會聊的事 372 00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:20,933 但在卡利歐的寶寶派對上 她們都在講生孩子的事 373 00:18:21,016 --> 00:18:22,726 「你跟我好像喔」 374 00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:25,604 天啊,那我生孩子的事呢? 375 00:18:25,687 --> 00:18:27,981 我要講什麼?我不知道 376 00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:32,986 是很艱辛的過程嗎?我要這樣說嗎? 377 00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:37,658 辛苦、心酸、身心俱創,又燒錢? 378 00:18:37,741 --> 00:18:40,994 我們的目標 是讓你帶回一個健康的寶寶 379 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:44,373 你也要夠健康,才能照顧寶寶 380 00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:48,085 你用什麼方式建立家庭 不干別人的事 381 00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:50,546 你知道大家都會來管我的事 382 00:18:50,629 --> 00:18:53,382 除非他們是小兒科醫生 383 00:18:53,882 --> 00:18:56,969 否則你就叫他們滾 384 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:01,014 好喔 385 00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:03,684 我可以叫他們滾 386 00:19:05,185 --> 00:19:07,479 你怎麼不早說這個選項? 387 00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:09,565 謝謝你 388 00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:20,534 我在這裡 389 00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:23,328 無論如何 390 00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:24,454 我知道 391 00:19:24,997 --> 00:19:25,831 我都在這裡 392 00:19:25,914 --> 00:19:27,082 謝謝 393 00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:42,890 所以,我們就這樣坐著? 394 00:19:43,974 --> 00:19:47,019 如果你只想坐著,不如進來坐吧 395 00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:49,646 這對我是頭一遭 396 00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:54,359 因為你也知道 我們平常不會這樣說話 397 00:19:55,319 --> 00:19:57,946 不過,我要當爸了 398 00:19:59,489 --> 00:20:00,324 真的嗎? 399 00:20:01,116 --> 00:20:04,036 她是炮友吧?你跟你爸一個樣 400 00:20:04,119 --> 00:20:06,455 她一定長得像你媽年輕的時候 401 00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:08,916 這就是為什麼我不該來這裡 402 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,876 你都來找塔瑞克這怪咖了 403 00:20:10,959 --> 00:20:13,795 -我們就好好聊 -別再這樣自稱了 404 00:20:14,630 --> 00:20:15,631 什麼… 405 00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:23,430 我… 406 00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:25,849 我在努力 407 00:20:27,434 --> 00:20:29,102 我要當爸爸了 408 00:20:30,479 --> 00:20:31,813 我在想… 409 00:20:32,439 --> 00:20:36,026 我希望小傢伙長大一點 我能帶他來這裡 410 00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:39,446 讓他認識爺爺,這是我的期望 411 00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:43,283 老實說,我也不確定這是好是壞 412 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:44,576 我知道你不確定 413 00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:46,662 但我覺得… 414 00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:48,705 我覺得這會很棒 415 00:20:49,748 --> 00:20:51,959 我可以當個好爺爺 416 00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:55,295 彌補你從來沒有的父愛 417 00:20:55,379 --> 00:20:56,838 諸如此類的 418 00:20:56,922 --> 00:21:01,009 我知道你覺得這有道理 我就不反駁了,雖然狗屁不通 419 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:03,136 但我就不計較,我懂你的心意 420 00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:04,179 聽我說 421 00:21:04,888 --> 00:21:06,765 這裡有很多人 422 00:21:07,474 --> 00:21:10,769 家人早就不跟他們聯絡了 423 00:21:11,478 --> 00:21:13,522 但你還願意理我 424 00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:15,899 我很感激 425 00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:18,193 好 426 00:21:19,569 --> 00:21:20,988 -好吧 -對 427 00:21:21,071 --> 00:21:21,905 好吧 428 00:21:23,615 --> 00:21:25,325 -我們就試試 -好 429 00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:27,494 別搞砸了 430 00:21:27,577 --> 00:21:30,038 我會盡量不搞砸,真的 431 00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,039 好 432 00:21:31,581 --> 00:21:35,127 說到這個,你那個骨架很大的 女生朋友最近怎樣? 433 00:21:35,210 --> 00:21:36,878 你又亂講話了,我才剛… 434 00:21:36,962 --> 00:21:40,007 我只是問你 那個豐滿的女生最近怎樣… 435 00:21:40,090 --> 00:21:41,383 我叫你別亂來 436 00:21:41,466 --> 00:21:42,634 你知道嗎? 437 00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:44,386 好吧,對不起 438 00:21:44,469 --> 00:21:45,345 (造型師面對面) 439 00:21:45,429 --> 00:21:48,682 提到風格,我認為重點在於意圖 440 00:21:48,765 --> 00:21:52,811 衣服從來就不只是衣服 而是一種溝通,一種記憶 441 00:21:52,894 --> 00:21:55,063 你覺得他們會讓我帶回家嗎? 442 00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:57,482 寶貝,不行,你家裡都有本尊了 443 00:21:57,566 --> 00:21:59,484 我會幫你問問,這想法不錯 444 00:21:59,568 --> 00:22:01,653 這太酷了 445 00:22:01,737 --> 00:22:04,990 太不可思議了 別害我哭醜了,我哭點很低 446 00:22:05,490 --> 00:22:07,242 天啊,你們看 447 00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:11,872 那個人是布萊德利歐德 布萊德利歐德 448 00:22:11,955 --> 00:22:13,248 布萊德利最棒了 449 00:22:13,332 --> 00:22:15,417 我愛布萊德利 450 00:22:15,500 --> 00:22:16,585 布萊德利是誰? 451 00:22:16,668 --> 00:22:18,920 布萊德利是購物臺的高層 452 00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:20,881 -對,我知道 -酷喔 453 00:22:20,964 --> 00:22:25,427 而我穿著自己的設計 站在一個能把它搬上電視的人旁邊 454 00:22:25,510 --> 00:22:28,347 我氣定神閒、處變不驚 沉著穩重、泰然自若 455 00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:29,389 謝謝 456 00:22:29,890 --> 00:22:31,641 抱歉,我超時了 457 00:22:31,725 --> 00:22:33,518 各位,掌聲謝謝烏瑞魏斯 458 00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:37,064 發光發熱吧,烏瑞 459 00:22:38,106 --> 00:22:40,233 接下來是我們最後一位造型師… 460 00:22:40,317 --> 00:22:42,986 我是說,設計師 461 00:22:43,070 --> 00:22:45,489 九月號封面人物,梅菲絲波蒙 462 00:22:45,572 --> 00:22:46,740 天啊! 463 00:22:47,407 --> 00:22:48,533 來一下 464 00:22:49,117 --> 00:22:50,494 你看起來超正 465 00:22:53,121 --> 00:22:54,831 天啊,大家好 466 00:22:54,915 --> 00:22:57,209 繼續鼓掌!我來了! 467 00:22:58,210 --> 00:22:59,503 哈囉! 468 00:22:59,586 --> 00:23:00,754 謝謝 469 00:23:00,837 --> 00:23:03,131 大家好,哇… 470 00:23:04,633 --> 00:23:05,509 好 471 00:23:06,009 --> 00:23:10,764 我環顧這個充滿愛與光芒的美麗會場 472 00:23:10,847 --> 00:23:12,099 我… 473 00:23:14,017 --> 00:23:16,603 很高興能來到這裡,與我的同業 474 00:23:16,686 --> 00:23:19,147 同事和我的緣定家人一同慶祝 475 00:23:20,649 --> 00:23:22,692 謝謝你,辛妮,給我這分殊榮 476 00:23:22,776 --> 00:23:26,738 這其實提醒了我 實現夢想需要多長的時間 477 00:23:27,614 --> 00:23:31,493 當你胸懷大志 外貌卻不符合大眾期待 478 00:23:31,576 --> 00:23:34,079 有時會覺得夢想永遠無法成真 479 00:23:34,162 --> 00:23:35,080 但其實可以 480 00:23:36,623 --> 00:23:38,458 我以前有個習慣 481 00:23:39,751 --> 00:23:43,463 凡事都要問別人的意見 482 00:23:43,964 --> 00:23:45,799 來決定是非對錯 483 00:23:47,008 --> 00:23:47,926 但是 484 00:23:49,094 --> 00:23:50,804 我現在不搞那套了 485 00:23:51,847 --> 00:23:53,098 我會聽自己的心聲 486 00:23:53,890 --> 00:23:56,476 我們真的該多相信自己 487 00:23:56,560 --> 00:24:00,730 直覺是你與生俱來最強大的力量 488 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,275 沒人能奪走你的直覺 489 00:24:03,358 --> 00:24:05,902 有時候,見鬼了,這才是唯一正解 490 00:24:07,696 --> 00:24:10,031 如果你今晚什麼都不記得 491 00:24:10,115 --> 00:24:11,366 請記得這一點 492 00:24:11,992 --> 00:24:13,493 你需要挺你的同伴 493 00:24:14,744 --> 00:24:16,121 那些好夥伴… 494 00:24:16,663 --> 00:24:18,874 -我愛你 -我也愛你 495 00:24:18,957 --> 00:24:19,875 你救了我一命 496 00:24:19,958 --> 00:24:22,169 …會在你最料不到的時候出現 497 00:24:22,252 --> 00:24:23,920 就在你需要的時候 498 00:24:24,421 --> 00:24:27,132 老實說,甚至是用你無法預測的方式 499 00:24:27,215 --> 00:24:28,258 今天還好嗎? 500 00:24:31,344 --> 00:24:32,554 準備好了嗎? 501 00:24:32,637 --> 00:24:35,849 有時候,你真的得經歷那些 狗屁倒灶的事 502 00:24:37,225 --> 00:24:39,561 才懂得美好的果實有多甜 503 00:24:41,396 --> 00:24:43,565 天啊,抱抱,擠過來,靠過來 504 00:24:43,648 --> 00:24:45,859 但當你找到了緣定家人 505 00:24:45,942 --> 00:24:47,986 生活就會更甜美一點 506 00:24:48,069 --> 00:24:49,863 …讓我好興奮 507 00:24:49,946 --> 00:24:50,947 (三年後) 508 00:24:51,031 --> 00:24:54,034 他們給你力量去慶祝美好的事物 509 00:24:56,536 --> 00:24:59,873 相信我,未來必定好事連連 510 00:25:10,175 --> 00:25:11,510 天啊 511 00:25:14,554 --> 00:25:17,140 太好了!天啊! 512 00:25:17,224 --> 00:25:18,683 上面那是我! 513 00:25:19,893 --> 00:25:21,770 -那是誰? -天啊! 514 00:25:21,853 --> 00:25:24,981 嗨,寶貝!嘿,親愛的 515 00:25:25,065 --> 00:25:26,274 你看 516 00:25:26,942 --> 00:25:28,818 嗨,寶貝,你看 517 00:25:28,902 --> 00:25:30,695 (梅菲絲個人品牌,獻給各種身形) 518 00:25:30,779 --> 00:25:34,824 就像我常說的,不是我們要追上世界 519 00:25:34,908 --> 00:25:37,911 是世界要追上我們 520 00:25:40,038 --> 00:25:41,748 謝謝大家 521 00:25:42,832 --> 00:25:43,750 好嗎? 522 00:26:06,356 --> 00:26:08,275 (改編自蜜雪兒伯托的著作) 523 00:26:37,846 --> 00:26:39,306 字幕翻譯:黃英哲