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(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
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GAVIN: Growing up is so many things.
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SINGER: We'll get through it all together
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AMIRI: Growing up is unpredictable.
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SINGER: This feeling's not forever
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SAGE: Growing up is a chance
to change the world.
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SINGER: Your time is right now...
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Growing up was... ugh!
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SINGER: Tell me how you feel
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Your scars will start to heal...
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We have the power and responsibility.
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SINGER: Tell me how you feel
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We're climbing up the hill
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Just don't keep your lips sealed...
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We deserve to be heard.
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SINGER: Just tell me how you feel
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GAVIN: Growing up is...
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-EMILY: Tumultuous.
-VANESSA: Cringy.
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-ATHENA: Confusing.
-SOFIA: Messy.
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-EMILY: Beautiful.
-GAVIN: Mandatory.
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-We did it!
-(APPLAUSE)
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(CAMERA CLICKS)
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(THEME MUSIC ENDS)
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SAGE: I denied myself happiness
for so long in so many ways
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because I never saw somebody
that looked like me on TV growing up.
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And a lot of spaces that I step into,
being openly queer, being happy,
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people don't understand that.
Too often we are not given the opportunity
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to see ourselves reflected
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in narratives of love and joy,
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and I wanted to change that.
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FEMALE VOICE: All right, Sage.
Whenever is good for you.
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-(WHISPERING) Let's go, Sage.
-Oh, so, do I just start talking?
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-Oh.
-(LAUGHTER)
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So, I'm Sage. I am 20 years old,
and I grew up in Maryland, in D.C.
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And I'm now based in New York.
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KAREN: Hi, cutie! (LAUGHS)
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I'm very, very proud to be Sage's mother,
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and I think everybody who meets Sage
would never forget her.
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She never wavered.
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She was strong. She was confident.
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She didn't apologize for who she was.
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And that strength and that confidence
only grew as she grew.
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IVAN: The most important thing to me
is that she had the freedom
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to become the person she wants to be.
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The part that is important to me is to
see her build what she wants for herself.
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SAGE: My earliest memories
of being a little girl,
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is just mimicking the things
that I saw my mom do.
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Activism was really inherent
in my growing up.
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Watching my parents
carve a space for themselves
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really gave me the courage to do the same.
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Ever since I was little,
I knew that I was a girl.
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I remember when I would go
to the store with my mom,
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I would always, like, point at boxes
that had girls on them and say...
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I would say "Mom, that's me."
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I turned anything into a dress
or into long hair,
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having so much fun, but knowing that,
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to an extent,
that had to say at home.
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I knew that I wasn't necessarily
who everyone else saw me to be.
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My parents were really welcoming,
and I even went to a club
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when I was younger
called Boys Who Like Girls' Things.
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Seeing a bunch of other little girls who
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had been told that they were little boys
and getting to write
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my own name that I chose,
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being respected
as a little girl for a day.
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How good that felt.
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KAREN: They would put on fashion shows,
and they were all very precocious
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and they were little.
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And then as she got a little bit older,
nine, ten, eleven,
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she started to identify as a gay boy.
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Because she didn't have the language.
"Well, what else could I be?"
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(GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING)
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SAGE: I remember my first year going
to sleepaway camp. I was 11 years old.
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I remember walking into my boy’s cabin.
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-Hey.
-SAGE: And there was another girl.
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I was so surprised.
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I was confused.
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I was excited.
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A part of me... saw myself.
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This is definitely your color.
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SAGE: And she explained to me
that she was transgender.
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Finding the language to express
my own identity was so important.
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Before that, I had no way to communicate
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my understanding of myself.
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I was just immediately, like, enamored.
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A personal favorite of mine.
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SAGE: I was so excited
to learn more from her,
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but what really excited me,
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was getting a look
at her suitcase. (CHUCKLES)
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There was something
so ultimately life changing.
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of experiencing
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another mixed Black trans girl
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existing right in front of me.
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Sporty but very, very nice. It is.
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SAGE: That was the moment that
I knew one hundred percent
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that I was trans, because I finally
had something to call it.
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That was a moment
that I will forever remember.
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And I don't know her now.
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We've not talked since summer camp.
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But I thank her
for showing up as she was.
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I thank her for being herself
before I could be me.
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I'm really glad that my parents
have accepted me,
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and loved me and uplifted me
in the ways that they have.
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They didn't have to, you know?
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Society would have been
completely okay and supportive of them
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turning their backs on me.
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There's a really specific pain
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that comes with waking up every morning,
knowing who you are,
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and putting on the wrong clothes,
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putting on the wrong name,
and putting on the wrong pronouns.
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And knowing exactly who you are,
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but having to continue to go
through life being misgendered.
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It hurts. And so, I began
transitioning outside of school.
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Every time I would get off the bus,
I would come home, and I would, like,
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put on my Forever 21 leggings
and my hair and, like, combat boots
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because I felt this
sense of gender euphoria.
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And I remember wanting
to transition at school.
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I begged my parents,
like, I begged my mom, like,
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"Please, Mom, please. Let me transition
at school." And so, she asked the school.
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They said, "Mm-mm. That's not happening.
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"There's no way that she can transition.
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"It'll be too much
of a distraction to the rest of the kids."
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So, my only way of expressing myself
was outside of school,
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and I wanted to share
that with my friends.
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One day, I decided to send them
pictures of me transitioned.
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We were sitting in English class,
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and a boy came over to me and my friends.
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He took her phone, and he decided
to start going through her photos.
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And there he saw
photos of me transitioned.
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And while I'm sitting,
doing my English assignment...
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-(PHONES VIBRATING, DINGING)
-...I just hear little buzzes and pings,
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and all of a sudden
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everyone in the class looks up
and they just stare at me.
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And I knew immediately
that I had been outed.
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And there was just this,
like, heat in my chest. It felt awful.
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I remember this boy, he said to me,
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"I dare you to come tomorrow
cross-dressed."
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And I took him up on that dare.
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The next morning, I remember putting on
my leggings, my wig...
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(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
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...my combat boots.
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And then, I walk into the front doors,
and everyone just stopped.
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Every teacher in the hallway,
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the office administrators,
the security guard...
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Everyone in the locker area
just stopped and stared.
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I lost friends.
People stopped talking to me.
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And a lot of what
people stopped talking to me for was
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not only how they felt about it,
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but how their parents felt.
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At the same time,
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I was happy
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because now there was nothing
that the school could tell me.
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Right? Everyone knew that I was trans.
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There was no going back.
You know, there was nothing
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that anybody at that school
could say or do to me
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that was more painful
than living a life that wasn't mine.
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KAREN: Of course, there were lots of
transgender and queer kids,
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but it... they weren't out.
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So, Sage was their first.
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IVAN: If you know that your child
has to go through different moments
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where people are not accepting,
it's painful.
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It had been difficult,
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but it's an education
at the same time.
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And I am very glad
that I've been educated by her.
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SAGE: The summer between
eighth grade and freshman year,
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I went back to that same summer camp
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and was forced to be in a boys' cabin,
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and I was now going into
a boys cabin as a girl.
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And I remember walking in
and all the boys looked at me...
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Why are you here?
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They said I had to come
to the boys' cabin.
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-Was there no room in the girls' cabin?
-Yeah. What's your deal?
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And I was like... (CHUCKLES)
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"Um... About that, I'm transgender.
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"And I was told
that I can't stay in the girls' cabin."
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And I think someone said,
"Well, like, what does that mean?"
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And I said, "I was assigned male at birth,
but I'm a girl."
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And I think someone said,
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"Well, that sucks that
they won't let you stay with the girls."
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And then one boy
asked me to tell them all my story.
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Well, trans is short
for transgender, and...
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(NARRATING)
I think to see these boys accept
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and acknowledge who I was,
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was another testament
to just how taught transphobia is.
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And that these boys
who were not with their parents,
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who had never met a trans person before,
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when given the opportunity
to learn, to accept, many of them did.
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But there was one camper who took
a real issue with me being trans.
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I was not good. I was not right.
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There was something wrong with me,
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and he was going to let me know that.
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Sometimes he would
tell me how much he hates me,
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sometimes he would tell me
how disgusting I am.
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He told me,
"No one will ever love a girl like you."
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And I believed it.
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It wasn't such a hard thing to believe.
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I felt that that was going
to be my future.
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(CRICKETS CHIRPING)
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And one night, I was walking home
to my cabin
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with the only other trans camper.
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And... he approached us,
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and then he attacked us.
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We're just screaming for help.
"Help! Help! Help, somebody!"
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And no one's coming.
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And finally, a camp counselor comes,
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and we're all taken to the office.
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We were sat down by the head of the camp,
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and the narrative
that was decided upon was
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this was not a hate crime.
This was, in fact, boys being boys.
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And for that reason,
my goal was to become stealth,
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right? For no one to know
that I was trans.
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For everyone to think of me as a cis girl.
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So, I switched school districts,
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and I did try to enter
high school stealth.
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When that boy said that
nobody would love you for who you are,
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that's something
that I really connect with.
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And I think that a lot of people...
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their journey is about learning to
accept themselves as lovable.
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Just because I felt the only way
that I could be worthy
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was to fit myself into a box
that wasn't made for me.
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(MELANCHOLIC MUSIC PLAYING)
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SAGE: I denied myself
the outfits that I wear now,
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wearing tights, wearing skirts,
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because I felt uncomfortable in my body,
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but I also felt I owed
a version of femininity to the world
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that wasn't authentic to me.
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I denied myself happiness
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because I didn't feel like
I was worthy of it.
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(SOBBING) I wish that
I had found that confidence...
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(SIGHS) ...and that happiness
earlier, you know?
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(MELANCHOLIC MUSIC CONCLUDES)
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One of the most impactful moments for me,
I remember, my mom picked me up
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from school and we went out to lunch.
There was a television in the corner,
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and Janet Mock's interview
came up on the screen.
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She is speaking out
and encouraging other trans women
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to live their lives openly and happily.
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MALE INTERVIEWER: Janet Mock is here to
chat with us about her life,
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her challenges and her book.
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I think I wrote it
just to kind of give girls,
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that grew up like myself, a mirror.
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I think we all kind of need reflections
of ourselves in pop culture,
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in media, and, of course, in literature.
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Janet Mock actively disproved
so many beliefs
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that I had about being trans.
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She had a loving partner.
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She was an existence of a career woman.
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00:14:42,049 --> 00:14:46,094
The way she carried herself
was so inspiring to me.
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She did her book tour,
and they came to Washington D.C.
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And I got in line to get my book signed.
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And I just started crying in the line.
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And I remember, she came over to me.
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She gave me a hug,
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and I felt like there
was a chance for me. And...
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it was a moment that I promised myself
that I would try my best
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to become who I wanted to be.
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00:15:16,458 --> 00:15:19,544
And I knew that the reality of being trans
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in school was terrible. It was harmful.
It was painful. It was violent,
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and I wanted to change that.
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00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:31,932
I remember in sophomore year,
the administration put together
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00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:36,186
for some of us students to go
to a White House summit
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about being Black, Brown,
and gay, queer in schools.
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It was a room full of educators,
who had real influence
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to change school culture.
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The executive director
of the White House initiative asked...
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What do trans students
need from our schools?
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SAGE: I had never been asked
as a trans girl
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what I needed from my school,
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and it was an answer
that I had been thinking of
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for a long time.
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What do trans students
need from our schools?
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We need to be allowed to use our pronouns.
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We need to be allowed
to use our chosen names.
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I need to be allowed to use
the girls' bathroom.
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I need my teachers to stop saying,
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"Boys line up on this side
of the classroom,
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"and girls line up on that side."
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(SCOFFS) We need all of this to stop now.
Because we deserve to be seen,
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we deserve to be heard,
and we deserve to be respected.
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I felt, "Wow. I finally said that
I'm trans in public, like, I can breathe."
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And then I remembered,
"I go to school with these people.
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"Who's gonna find out?
Who are they gonna tell?
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"What's gonna happen tomorrow?"
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That day, I made the decision that,
although it would be scary
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to go back to school and it'd be scary
to hear what people had to say...
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there was no way I was going back
into stealth mode.
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I wasn't gonna hide
that I was trans anymore.
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00:17:11,656 --> 00:17:15,410
I was going to live
in my truth for the rest of my life.
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00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:20,373
I felt such immense joy
and pride about being trans.
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My activism evolved.
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I began doing more journalism,
more speaking.
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And I remember that piece I wrote
on being a trans woman
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at this Women's March.
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I wrote about how hard I had fought
to occupy my femininity.
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The article was included
in Condé Nast commemorative edition
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of the Women's March,
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and I became one of their first
trans youth contributing authors.
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She was very articulate
and a great writer.
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She kept writing
and she just never stopped.
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IVAN: I just want her to be
happy and healthy,
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so she can continue to do
everything she wants to do.
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00:18:02,958 --> 00:18:06,128
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)
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After I began writing and doing
a lot of policy organization,
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00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:19,349
I wanted to connect to that education
in a way that felt more authentic to me.
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00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:23,186
So, I decided to create my own magazine.
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00:18:24,521 --> 00:18:26,690
(INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC PLAYING)
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00:18:29,568 --> 00:18:34,781
It was born out of my desire
to see myself and my peers
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00:18:34,906 --> 00:18:37,450
represented in a more authentic way
than we were used to.
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00:18:38,118 --> 00:18:41,746
I still remember our first photo shoots.
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00:18:41,872 --> 00:18:45,750
It was scary.
It was nerve-racking.
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00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:47,294
I can't work this thing.
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They're here.
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00:18:50,172 --> 00:18:54,467
And I just remember
the fear that overtook me,
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00:18:54,593 --> 00:18:59,347
but everything is always
a learning opportunity.
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00:18:59,681 --> 00:19:04,519
Hey. Hey, I'm Sage.
This is Zahri. We're the directors.
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00:19:04,728 --> 00:19:06,730
We're really glad that y'all here.
Y'all look great.
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00:19:06,897 --> 00:19:08,356
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
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00:19:10,442 --> 00:19:13,612
This is gonna be the cover
of the Genesis Issue.
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00:19:13,695 --> 00:19:17,657
And what we really want to capture
with this is the power that y'all have.
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00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:20,285
Not only as members
of the Gen Z generation,
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00:19:20,410 --> 00:19:22,162
but as artists and creatives.
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00:19:22,913 --> 00:19:24,873
Okay, great. Let's get started.
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00:19:25,165 --> 00:19:27,334
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)
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00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:36,384
(SHUTTER CLICKING)
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00:19:36,468 --> 00:19:40,138
It really taught me
the importance of community
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00:19:40,472 --> 00:19:43,099
and that we really are
our greatest resource.
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00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:46,269
And they trusted
it would work out and it did.
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00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:47,771
(SHUTTER CLICKING)
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00:19:49,856 --> 00:19:53,526
Team Mag is invested
in creating opportunities
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00:19:53,735 --> 00:19:56,071
-for young Black and Brown artists...
-(SHUTTER CLICKING)
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00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:59,115
...to create art and to consume art
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00:19:59,324 --> 00:20:03,370
that represents them in narratives
of love, celebration, acceptance and joy.
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00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:08,875
Here we are years later,
and we're still creating work.
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00:20:11,002 --> 00:20:15,423
I went to school with you
and saw how strong you were, and brave,
333
00:20:15,674 --> 00:20:18,093
and, like, the everyday aspects
of everything that you did.
334
00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:22,389
And I'm so sorry that you had
to sacrifice that part of yourself.
335
00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:25,433
But it wasn't in vain, because there are
so many young queer people
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00:20:25,517 --> 00:20:28,561
at our school now
who feel absolutely, utmost,
337
00:20:28,645 --> 00:20:30,647
completely loved by all the admin.
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00:20:31,022 --> 00:20:33,817
It's just amazing
how much you were able to...
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00:20:34,526 --> 00:20:38,154
shift the school's culture.
We owe so much to you
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00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:41,950
and you really did crawl
so we could run and it's really true.
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00:20:42,033 --> 00:20:43,618
Thank you so much.
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00:20:44,744 --> 00:20:47,122
(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
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00:20:49,249 --> 00:20:53,962
SAGE: My journey to loving myself
was a long one
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00:20:54,129 --> 00:20:56,673
and it was a hard one,
and it's one that I'm still on.
345
00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:04,764
I want to open the door
for kids like us,
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00:21:04,931 --> 00:21:10,812
to be able to tell their stories
authentically and unapologetically.
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00:21:12,856 --> 00:21:14,316
Following your joy will lead you
348
00:21:14,482 --> 00:21:18,778
to the community that celebrates you
and loves you, as you should be.
349
00:21:22,574 --> 00:21:23,700
I was a girl
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00:21:23,783 --> 00:21:27,287
because the others called girls
seemed to like the same things.
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00:21:27,996 --> 00:21:30,206
I learned this from my mother.
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00:21:31,041 --> 00:21:32,709
I watched her from the hallway,
353
00:21:32,834 --> 00:21:35,962
after showers,
wrap her hair in bath towels.
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00:21:36,296 --> 00:21:39,174
My father showed me how to walk,
but it wasn't right for me.
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00:21:40,175 --> 00:21:42,427
So, he taught me
how to laugh in their faces
356
00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:44,262
and smile back when they sneer.
357
00:21:44,387 --> 00:21:46,598
Putting on the act of a boy under the sun,
358
00:21:46,723 --> 00:21:48,183
lip gloss in my pockets.
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00:21:48,475 --> 00:21:50,060
The mirror hurt to look in.
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00:21:50,435 --> 00:21:54,022
Boyhood was never meant for me.
I always knew that.
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00:21:54,689 --> 00:21:56,775
I know who I am.
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00:21:56,941 --> 00:21:58,151
Who are you?
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00:21:58,443 --> 00:22:00,528
(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
364
00:22:07,952 --> 00:22:10,955
(CHEERING)
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00:22:12,332 --> 00:22:14,709
-(LAUGHTER)
-(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
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00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:19,464
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
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00:23:05,427 --> 00:23:06,803
(MUSIC ENDS)