NEON BUZZING
LINE STRAINING, GRUNTING
Huh? Hello.
SCREAMS
♪ Supervillain, ahead of his time
♪ Incredibly handsome genius Criminal mastermind
♪ But now he's all cleaned up And fighting crime
♪ A superhero that you stream online
♪ It's Megamind
♪ Oh, it feels good To be good this time
♪ It's Megamind
♪ Oh, it's Megamind
♪ Rules!
DRAMATIC MUSIC, ENERGY WHIRRING
ZAP, GRUNTING
FIZZLING What's the matter?
Don't like my new style?
Actually, it's fantastic.
It's the whole being-evil-and- zapping-us we find problematic.
LAUGHING
If only I had hands to applaud this beautiful reunion.
If only you had an actual mouth I could shut!
Oh, so spunky, and so utterly exhausting.
Your fight is with me, Machiavillain.
It doesn't have to be.
Tell me, have you ever wondered how I know so much about you?
About the binky? There's still so much I could teach you.
Just admit that your place is with me.
I know where my place is, Machiavillain,
and it's with the side of good, not evil!
Then you'll have to fight the one person
who means more to you than anyone else in the world!
I won't fight Roxanne!
Megamind's got a little crush on me.
CRACKLING Isn't that sweet?
In 22 minutes,
I've programmed the Evil Signal to go global,
turning everyone on Earth into a villain!
If you're going to be true to your heroic nature,
you'll have to stop the satellite.
And if Evil Roxie is going to be true to her evil nature,
she'll have to try to stop you! DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
WHOOSHES
Don't worry. I'll make this quick.
Not so fast, my dear.
Victories are meant to be savoured.
I propose we give our tenacious hero
a five-minute head start.
BEEP, ROXANNE GROANS
Fine. TENSE MUSIC
How are we supposed to save the day in 22 minutes?
It's only 20 now.
Look, the important thing is to remain calm
and focus on the positive.
Luckily, I have countless gizmos here
that can destroy that satellite. BUZZER
STRAINING Access denied.
Oh, come on!
You didn't think I was going to make it easy, did you?
Easy, no. But ever hear of a thing
called hero-villain courtesy?
Perhaps we can be of service.
Well, well, well. Looks like the Doom Syndicate
fell victim to a good old-fashioned double-cross.
Not even sure what I'm doing here.
Uh, what happened to Pierre Pressure's accent?
Machiavillain stole it when he stole our powers.
Last I remember, I was standing in front of a mirror,
trying to hypnotise myself into believing I was French, and...
Oh...
Now, the only thing that'll mend our dark,
broken hearts is revenge! Please.
You're just looking for an opportunity to escape.
You'll destroy me the first chance you get.
What make Megamind say something so hurtful to old friends?
Maybe it has something to do with all of you
trying to destroy me multiple times!
It is important to forgive.
Behemoth even write poem about it,
which he'll now recite from memory.
ROMANTIC MUSIC Oh, sweet forgiveness!
You will... Porta-prison, mute.
Time's almost up.
If I can't access my gizmos, I'll have to build one.
I have to get to Everything City!
I'm coming with you.
And don't give me any of that it's-too-dangerous stuff.
Wouldn't dream of it,
but someone needs to watch the binky.
You take it! Maybe it'll give you an edge.
I told you, I'm not fighting Roxanne.
But we also can't risk it falling back into evil hands.
I need you to guard that with your life.
The binky... TENSE STING
Even though I'm the one that sorta gave it
to the bad guy in the first place?
We all make mistakes. It's whether or not
we choose to learn from them that's important.
You up for this? I won't let you down!
I know you won't. HEROIC MUSIC
Special chair, eject!
BLASTING
GLASS SHATTERS, SCREAMING
Look! Megamind's trying to escape!
ZOOMING, WHIMPERING
SCREAMING
CROWD YELLING Where'd he go?
That handsome devil is running down the alley.
Let's get him!
He's over here! Let's find him!
Don't let him get away!
Never underestimate the collective stupidity of evil mobs.
TENSE MUSIC, BEEPING
Time's up. Roxie, sic 'em! CRACKING KNUCKLES
With pleasure!
GRUNTING, CRASHING
You know, for someone who taught Megamind
everything he knows, you don't seem to know him very well.
Good luck even finding him!
Which is why you are going to tell moi, mon ami.
WHIRRING Where is Monsieur Megamind
and what is he planning to do?
He's heading to Everything City to build a weapon
to jank your satellite. WHIRRING STOPS
Oh, man, that's totally cheating!
Merci beaucoup! BLASTING
ZOOMING, DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
Polly 227, follow Roxie.
I don't want to miss a minute of what comes next.
CAWING Oh, boy.
Almost have everything to build a home-made Megazooka.
Just need something highly unsafe and volatile
to act as an explosive.
Bongo!
BEEPING, WHOOSH Whoa!
STOMPING, HEAVY METAL RINGTONE
BEEP Not really a good time, Keiko.
Evil Roxie put a Pierre Pressure whammy on me,
and she's heading your way!
LOUD CRASH, GASPS
DUST SETTLING
Megamind...
Come out and play... DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
Keiko, gotta go. About to die.
EVIL LAUGH
Real talk. Is that your actual annoying laugh
or something you practised?
Don't take your frustrations out on me.
I'm not the one who left you to babysit
while the real hero-ing is done by the adults.
SCOFFS I think I can handle myself.
Well, let's put that to the test, shall we?
DIALLING
YELLING, PHONES RINGING
'I have a most generous offer
'for my villain colleagues out there.
'Whoever comes to the lair and retrieves the binky,
'allowing me to restore myself to my corporeal form,
'will be deemed Metro City's new overlord,
'after I assume control of soon-to-be Evil Earth, of course.'
From lackey to sidekick to evil overlord of Metro City?
Now, that's a career path. DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
BEEPING Alert, alert.
Alert, alert. Alert, alert.
Are we feeling in over our head yet?
SCRAPING, TENSE MUSIC
I know you're close.
SCRAPING STOPS, DEEP SNIFF
SCRAPING RESUMES I can smell your cologne.
Pour homme, is it?
Why must I be so vain?
MUSIC STOPS
THUD, TENSE MUSIC PLAYING
Hm... SIZZLING
There you are! ZAP
EXPLOSION, SQUEAK
'Now what did those teddies ever do to you?'
Consider it a coming attraction.
'This isn't who you are, Roxanne.' Who cares?
Look how powerful I am! WHIRRING, ZAP
'Take it from me. Power without purpose is pointless. And lonely.'
Maybe this is the real me!
DRAMATIC CRESCENDO Ah, ha! Huh?
'No, Roxanne. I know the real you.'
No, you don't!
METAL RINGTONE, BEEP
'Uh, boss, just checking in.'
Uh, any chance you'll be turning everyone normal
in the next, say, 30 seconds?
I'm a little in over my head here.
Keiko, when you're a hero, you're always in over your head.
The trick is to not lose your head.
'Take a moment, breathe,
'and often you'll find the answer is staring right back at you.'
Am I interrupting something?
ZAP, FIZZLE Ah!
Megamind. Megamind? Are you there?
LOUD BANG, GASPS
RAPID BEEPING, BANG
BLOWS Sorry to cut your call short,
but I prefer your full attention.
That is, unless you're too scared to face me.
Huh. Guess that answers that question.
Oh, how disappointed you must be.
That's my problem with the whole hero thing.
They get your hopes up, only to let you down in the end.
Quiet! I'm trying to think! Megamind said
the answer is often staring right back at you...
That's it!
Unmute! BEEP
Nothing tastes as sweet. ROMANTIC MUSIC
The end. Got a little proposition for you guys.
Agree to help me defend the lair, and I'll let you out.
We both got tricked by Machiavillain,
and we both want the same thing. Payback.
OVERLAPPING DISCUSSING
Maybe...
OVERLAPPING DISCUSSING
Looks like you got yourself a team-up, kid.
TRIUMPHANT MUSIC, BUZZING STOPS
The Incompetence Brigade has assembled.
I'm so scared
BANGING
That's a hundred evil citizens trying to break down the door.
We need to turn this lair into a fortress before it's thousands!
If we're gonna have any kinda chance, we're gonna need help.
Oh, I hope these passcodes still work!
Intruder alert. Intruder alert.
Come on, come on! Destroy.
Des... BUZZING, BEEPING
Yeah. Good to have you back, guys!
DOOM SYNDICATE GRUNTING
WHOOSHING, THUD
We need something really big to block this entrance!
Behemoth, stand over there.
GROWLING
BANG Behemoth helping!
All you've done is delay the inevitable by, what, minutes?
Seconds? I'm going to enjoy every...
What? Sorry! Can't hear you. CLICK
Volume's going down. BEEPING
Well played, kid. Alert, alert.
OK. Everyone to your battle stations!
And remember! Non-lethal tactics!
We don't wanna really hurt anyone.
Fine...
One Megazooka assembled.
Now to blow up one laser satellite, so everyone stops being evil.
You know, typical Thursday stuff.
WHOOSHING Ah!
Roxanne, no!
WHIRRING, CRUNCH
FIZZLING, PARTS CLATTER
Did I just break your last-ditch effort to save the world?
Oopsie-daisy!
I just love final confrontations.
They're so, uh,
final. RUMBLING
WHOOSHING
SCREAMING, DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
Not so fast!
I'm not done playing with you yet.
I'm not going to fight you, Roxie!
Fair enough. But here at the end...
You're only hurting yourself.
GRUNTS
What have you done with my favourite hand?!
What have you done with my second favourite hand?!
GRUNTING, STRUGGLING
Megamind gives himself a right. Megamind gives himself a left.
And another. And another!
Looks like he's going for a body slam!
And he hits the ground like a sack of tomatoes.
How much more punishment can he take?
Can't let him have all the fun.
Tag me in! HE GASPS
No! Don't tag her in!
DRAMATIC CRESCENDO, HE GROANS
Right hand, you traitor! WHOOSH
Float like a butterfly, sting like me!
Ooh, a nasty right cross sends our hero to the canvas!
BANGING, BEHEMOTH STRAINING
Here they come. Get ready.
BANGING, GRUNTING
Nothing gets past...
ZAP, CLATTERING
...Behemoth...
That's what happens when you're stuck between a rock
and a Dr Glazer Donut!
EVIL MOB LAUGHING, YELLING
Doom Syndicate! Hold the line!
DOOM SYNDICATE YELLING
You want some of this? Get outta the way!
CROWD YELLING
Brainbots! Deploy Porta-prisons! BEEPING
ZAPPING, YELLING
Oh, this is actually working! Hyah!
GRUNTS, KEIKO SCREAMS
I'll take that binky, if you don't mind.
You should've joined us, Keiko.
Evil isn't my thing! And it's not yours either, Chum.
But if you won't listen to me, then listen to this.
POLKA DOT LLAMA SONG FAST VERSION
HE GRUNTS Keiko?
Oh, I don't know what came over me!
It's good to have you back.
SONG CONTINUES Keep those on.
It's drowning out the sound that turned everyone evil.
Gladly!
GRUNTING TO SONG, TENSE MUSIC
Hello, old friend.
ZAPPING
VACUUM WHIRRING
CLINKING
EVIL LAUGHTER
MEGAMIND GROANS
I'm getting the pukies!
GRUNTS Then fight me!
GROANING Never.
Pathetic! HE GRUNTS
What has all this hero nonsense gotten you?
Even before my mind-altering satellite,
look how quickly those simpletons turned on you.
But still, you defend them?
Because I know what's in their hearts, Machiavillain.
Just like Roxanne knew what was in mine.
And I refuse to betray the person I know, deep down,
is still there.
Then you are truly lost to me.
Roxie, end him! TENSE MUSIC
Finally!
Whoa! Caw!
Ca-caw! ZOOMING
Hm. Guess he still has a little fight left in him. Good.
CAGES BUZZING
Did we do it?
I think we did it! ALARM BUZZES
BEEPING Alert, alert. Alert.
This is what we in the villain community call
"speaking too soon".
I'm very disappointed in you, Keiko.
When that evil horde frees me,
you will be rightly punished for your good behaviour, young lady!
Not now, Evil Mom!
It's not looking good, guys. We're down to our last brainbot.
The future's looking dark as a raven's tail.
I say we make a cowardly retreat!
Behemoth agree.
You and your fish friend are welcome to come along, kid.
I'm staying. Look, it's true. We can't possibly win.
There's too many of them and way too few of us.
But how many times have you guys
thought you had the drop on Megamind,
only for him to pull out a last-minute win?
We generally don't focus on the negative,
but a lot. And that's all we have to do.
Buy Megamind a few more last minutes.
SHE SIGHS
This goes against every fibre of my evil being,
but if we let this punk kid show us up,
we'll never hear the end of it at this year's Villain-Fest.
Agreed.
CROWD YELLING
ALL GASP
YELLING CONTINUES
DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
WEAK CAWING
GASPING
WHOOSHING, ELECTRICITY SIZZLING
Recognise this spot? GASPS
Of course! Back when I was weak.
It's where you saved me from Titan.
That's where you're wrong, Roxanne.
This is the spot where you saved me.
You had faith that somewhere inside me,
there was a better person wanting to come out.
You were right. You were so right.
Stop talking!
GRUNTING
If you can find the good in someone like me,
I know you can find it in yourself.
ZAPPING
Pay him no mind, Roxie.
It's just the sad words of a blue-headed buffoon
who doesn't know when he is beaten.
I'm feeling pretty beaten, actually.
Your failure as an evil student is my failure as an evil mentor,
and I hate failure!
Roxie, control-alt-delete this mistake.
With pleasure.
GRUNTS, POWER WHIRRING
SCREAMING, DRAMATIC CRESCENDO
ANGRY MOB CHATTERING, TENSE MUSIC
Get 'em! Grab 'em! Get him!
We can't give up!
Never.
EVIL LAUGHTER, SHOUTING
DRAMATIC MUSIC, THUNDER RUMBLING
I know you won't hurt me, Roxanne!
Willing to bet your life on it?
Willing to bet everything.
Because like I said before,
you're the goodest thing that's ever happened to me.
HOPEFUL MUSIC, WHOOSHING
MUSIC DROWNS OUT SPEECH
HOPEFUL MUSIC BUILDS
WHIRRING STOPS
EYES WHOOSH
Roxanne?
ROMANTIC MUSIC
ROXANNE SIGHS
I've been wanting to do that for a while.
No, no, no!
This is impossible!
All that genius planning, only to be defeated
by a pathetic declaration of love?!
Writing a song, repurposing the satellite.
I mean, that's time I'll never get back!
Right. The satellite.
I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere.
ZOOMING, TRIUMPHANT MUSIC
WHOOSHING, POWERS RUMBLING
WHIRRING
ZAPPING, SATELLITE CREAKING
WHIRRING DOWN
What am I doing?
I don't know what came over me.
Oh, Keiko!
Mom! BLANCHE SIGHS
I'm so proud of you for not listening to evil me.
You got moves, kid. If you wanted,
I bet you'd be a pretty good villain.
And if you wanted, I bet you would be a pretty good hero.
Hey! No reason to get nasty.
MACHIAVILLAIN LAUGHING, CROWD GASPS
I wouldn't celebrate just yet.
HISSING, DRAMATIC MUSIC
Machiavillain's alive?! He can't be! What?!
Oh, no. Here's a lesson for all of you.
Evil always lives to fight another day.
And I promise you,
when next we meet, I will... You know, I'm just gonna...
CRASH, DUST SETTLING
Oh... my hair.
Never underestimate evil's need to brag about itself.
UPBEAT MUSIC
Megamind! Megamind! Megamind! Megamind!
CHEERING
Actually, it was more of a "we" thing.
Let's hear it for our mayor!
CHEERING Yes! Woo-hoo!
Roxie!
My hero.
Sir! The old team, back together again!
And now, to deal with Machiavillain.
Already handled, Sir.
Let's just say he's pretty crushed about his defeat.
DORKY LAUGH, SNORT
It's funny because he was totally crushed
by a piece of satellite! LAUGHS
CURIOUS MUSIC If I know my old mentor,
it's gonna take more than that to teach him a lesson.
BEEP
'Where am I?'
You taught me so much,
thought maybe I'd teach you a lesson.
That's why I've turned you
into the lair's new digitised assistant.
Ugh, preposterous! I am evil incarnate!
I would never lower myself to...
What's the temperature outside? GLITCHING
Sunny, sir. And a comfortable 73 degrees
with a light breeze coming from the southeast.
What's happening to me?!
For the first time, you're serving others.
Don't worry. It's a process.
After all, I'm still learning myself!
No!
UPBEAT MUSIC
It's been a few days since Machiavillain's attack on Metro.
CAWING
It's really cool seeing everyone working
to put the city back the way it was.
Even people you wouldn't think would ever work together.
Maybe we can keep this feeling.
Maybe we can all be heroes to each other.
Then we'll be destined for...
for... Greatness, Keiko.
We'll be destined for greatness.
STATIC, CROWD CHEERING
You look good in blue.
CHEERING CONTINUES
I'm sure the Doom Syndicate was glad to get their powers back.
Who said I gave them back?
DOORS SLAM
Ma'am! The Go Fish Gang just broke out of prison,
and they're robbing the Metro City Gold Reserve!
No rest for the formerly wicked.
Now let's get to work!
TRIUMPHANT MUSIC
♪ Supervillain, ahead of his time
♪ Incredibly handsome genius Criminal mastermind
♪ But now he's all cleaned up And fighting crime
♪ A superhero that you stream online
♪ It's Megamind
♪ Oh, it feels good To be good this time
♪ It's Megamind
♪ Oh, it's Megamind Rules! ♪
Subtitles by accessibility@itv.com