1 00:00:02,544 --> 00:00:06,297 "Teddy Thompson, Pasadena's number one real estate agent. 2 00:00:06,297 --> 00:00:07,424 Don't just dream it. 3 00:00:07,424 --> 00:00:09,342 - Own it." - Own it! 4 00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:12,053 That picture's plastered on the side of every bus in town. 5 00:00:12,053 --> 00:00:13,221 Mmm. 6 00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:15,348 Ironic that yesterday I got plastered on the front of one. 7 00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:18,435 Ooh, well, I will not use the word "plastered" in your obituary. 8 00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:20,895 Uh, "splattered"? Oh, I'll work on it. 9 00:00:20,895 --> 00:00:23,273 So this is a real fixer-upper. 10 00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:24,566 When are you gonna fix it? 11 00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:26,985 Morning, Nell. Haven't received your rent yet. 12 00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:31,406 Also, there is something aggressively stinking up your side of the refrigerator. 13 00:00:31,406 --> 00:00:35,994 Oh, sorry. I-- I don't have any more checks or money. 14 00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:38,288 And, um, that smell is a combination 15 00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:40,707 of leftover soups from last week I'm gonna have for lunch today. 16 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:44,502 Gross. Just make sure you remove your Frankensoups from the apartment 17 00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:46,296 on your way to work, which is none of my business, 18 00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:48,339 but I do think that should've been, like, 20 minutes ago. 19 00:00:48,339 --> 00:00:51,301 {\an8}What? What? No. Damn it! Ugh! 20 00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,261 {\an8}So, you're a renter? 21 00:00:53,261 --> 00:00:55,847 I just don't think I can represent you. 22 00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:59,184 When I died, I was this close to closing on a $10 million listing. 23 00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:01,227 I'm strictly in the luxury market. 24 00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:03,646 What kind of property am I? 25 00:01:03,646 --> 00:01:06,191 A condo near the airport whose value is depreciating. 26 00:01:06,941 --> 00:01:08,359 I am not depreciating. 27 00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:11,279 If you could send it out for me, that would be great. Thank you. 28 00:01:11,279 --> 00:01:13,156 - Sam! Ugh. - Hey! 29 00:01:13,156 --> 00:01:14,991 - Sam, am I depreciating? - Mm-hmm? 30 00:01:14,991 --> 00:01:17,869 Oh, is this a skin care thing? Because if so, I have an off-brand retinol 31 00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:20,497 that'll just burn an entire layer off of your face by Monday. 32 00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:22,916 Ooh, no. Ah. I mean, metaphorically. 33 00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:25,668 I-I-I'm afraid I might be growing mold in my basement. 34 00:01:25,668 --> 00:01:27,879 Oh, yeah, honey. I don't think I have a cream for that. 35 00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:30,465 I've been here for a year, you know. Do they consider me an asset? 36 00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:34,552 What? Of course they do. You are smart, you are fun to be around, 37 00:01:34,552 --> 00:01:37,305 and you are the only one strong enough to lift the Sparkletts. 38 00:01:37,305 --> 00:01:40,308 All right, people, listen up. It's time for some housecleaning. 39 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:44,479 Now, my father, the owner and publisher of this paper, the reason you're all alive, 40 00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:48,233 is coming here today, and everything needs to be perfect. 41 00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:50,318 I'm not stressed. You're not stressed. Nobody's stressed. 42 00:01:50,318 --> 00:01:53,279 All right? So why don't we just all clear our cubicles 43 00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:56,116 of any unprofessional and non-news-related personal effects? 44 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,159 What is this? "Live, laugh, love." 45 00:01:58,159 --> 00:02:00,078 More like, "Barf, barf, barf." 46 00:02:01,996 --> 00:02:04,707 Sam, can I stash a couple photos of the kids in here? 47 00:02:04,707 --> 00:02:07,585 They're adorable and joyful, everything Mr. Rhodes hates. 48 00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:09,379 Yeah, sure. Bring it in. Okay. 49 00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:10,880 Oh, God. What? 50 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,966 Dennis, you've been fostering for a couple of months. 51 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,676 How do you have so many pictures? 52 00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:16,386 I just want to capture every moment. 53 00:02:16,386 --> 00:02:17,679 Look at this. - Okay. 54 00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,389 It's the first day Ben and I brought them home. 55 00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:20,598 - Very sweet. - Yeah. 56 00:02:20,598 --> 00:02:22,267 First time in the living room. Well... 57 00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:24,018 First time in the dining room. 58 00:02:24,018 --> 00:02:26,020 Oh. First time in the hallway. 59 00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:27,355 Okay, sweetheart. Get it together. 60 00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,399 - Parenting is not that great. - Sam. Dennis. 61 00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:31,067 Here are the binders you'll need 62 00:02:31,067 --> 00:02:33,778 for the major presentation I've prepared for my father. 63 00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:35,989 Ooh, this is a chance for you to increase your value. 64 00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:37,866 - Ask for a binder. - Can I have a binder? 65 00:02:37,866 --> 00:02:39,742 Nell, oh, you surprised me. 66 00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:41,911 You're always lurking about like a little church mouse. 67 00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:43,329 What do you need a binder for? 68 00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:46,666 I'd like to be in the meeting. I have a decade of journalistic experience. 69 00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:48,877 I-I think I could bring some value to the table. 70 00:02:51,045 --> 00:02:52,463 Nell, over the past year, 71 00:02:52,463 --> 00:02:57,552 I've come to know you as a friend to Sam and also an acquaintance/employee to me. 72 00:02:57,552 --> 00:02:59,262 So I don't want you to take this the wrong way, 73 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:02,599 but it's just that my father needs to see the very best of the paper, 74 00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:03,892 and you are, um-- 75 00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,310 The worst. 76 00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:08,897 That wasn't very nice, Mason. 77 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:11,107 Ah, what a scamp. Come on, A-team. Let's go. 78 00:03:11,107 --> 00:03:13,401 - Mason got a binder? - I don't know. I'm so sorry. 79 00:03:30,793 --> 00:03:32,587 {\an8}Good morning, everyone. 80 00:03:32,587 --> 00:03:35,381 {\an8}Great to see you again if we've met before. 81 00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:37,842 {\an8}Wow, nice shirt. We're gonna buy you a mirror. 82 00:03:37,842 --> 00:03:39,469 {\an8}- I'll remove it, sir. - Good call. 83 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:40,970 {\an8}It's a pleasure to see you, Father. 84 00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:45,516 {\an8}Alexis. You're looking as stern as your grandmother more and more every day. 85 00:03:45,516 --> 00:03:46,893 {\an8}And you look wealthy, Father. 86 00:03:49,604 --> 00:03:51,356 Mmm. 87 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:52,440 I'm excited you're here 88 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:56,152 {\an8}to review the progress of the crown jewel of the Rhodes family corporate holdings. 89 00:03:56,152 --> 00:03:58,279 {\an8}I have put together a thorough presentation 90 00:03:58,279 --> 00:04:01,366 {\an8}with some of my top people and their giant binders. 91 00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:02,909 {\an8}They're-- They're very heavy. 92 00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:08,122 {\an8}No spoilers, but I'm also excited to tell you that circulation is up 3%. 93 00:04:08,122 --> 00:04:11,000 {\an8}Ah, 3%, like the milk. 94 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,962 {\an8}Yes. 95 00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,257 {\an8}Step away from my father's array of special treats. 96 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,592 {\an8}Sorry, these scones are so dry. 97 00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:21,052 {\an8}It's like eating a bath bomb. 98 00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:24,097 {\an8}And who is that with the crumbs? 99 00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:27,100 {\an8}Oh, she's just the obituary writer. She has no binder. 100 00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:28,810 {\an8}It's still in my throat. 101 00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:32,605 {\an8}You know, actually, she is the one that I came here to see. 102 00:04:33,189 --> 00:04:34,065 {\an8}Did he say me? 103 00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:38,194 {\an8}You see, I've been reflecting on my very important life lately, 104 00:04:38,194 --> 00:04:41,656 {\an8}and I think it's time to consider what the world will read about me 105 00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:42,991 {\an8}when I'm gone. 106 00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:45,201 {\an8}Titan. Maverick. 107 00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,203 {\an8}Titan of all mavericks. 108 00:04:47,203 --> 00:04:49,664 {\an8}See, these are all words used to describe me. 109 00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:51,666 {\an8}Of course. Accurate ones at that. 110 00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:55,086 {\an8}Yep. You know what? Finish up whatever you're doing with your mouth, 111 00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:56,796 {\an8}and, uh, let's get to work, huh? 112 00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:59,382 But Nell is one of our more insignificant workers. 113 00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:01,968 {\an8}If you wanted to work with one of our more significant people, uh, 114 00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,052 {\an8}me's available. 115 00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:04,387 {\an8}Ah, no need, darling. 116 00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,348 {\an8}I'm gonna talk to Mel. 117 00:05:07,348 --> 00:05:09,183 "I'll just talk to Mel." - Mm-hmm. 118 00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:11,811 {\an8}Oh. 119 00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:15,606 {\an8}It is very nice to finally meet you, Mr. Rhodes. You have a lovely newspaper. 120 00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:19,610 {\an8}Aw, well, it's nice to meet you as well. And I haven't read your writing yet, 121 00:05:19,610 --> 00:05:22,947 but judging from your hands, you're a really hard worker. 122 00:05:22,947 --> 00:05:24,991 Thanks. I have seasonal eczema. 123 00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:26,075 Ah. 124 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,329 So, let me ask you, how does this work? 125 00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:33,291 Do I, uh, dictate to you? Do I act out scenes? 126 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:37,754 Oh, uh, typically, you know, I do some research, talk to loved ones. 127 00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:39,297 Could you get that for me? 128 00:05:44,093 --> 00:05:45,094 Whew. 129 00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:48,181 Okay. So, tell me what might be 130 00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:50,641 the first thing you want people to know about you when you're gone. 131 00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:54,354 Oh, wow. I'm really not good off the t-- top of my head. 132 00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:55,938 In 1987, 133 00:05:55,938 --> 00:06:01,361 I acquired two of the most dominant light bulb retail chains in America, 134 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:04,238 The Light Bulb Plus and The Light Bulb Stop, 135 00:06:04,238 --> 00:06:08,826 and I merged them into Light Bulb Chalet. 136 00:06:09,410 --> 00:06:11,746 Okay. That's pretty good. 137 00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:14,207 And it cut 2,000 jobs nationwide. 138 00:06:15,541 --> 00:06:17,460 I'm sure they all just went back to school. 139 00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:23,549 What's that smell? 140 00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:25,802 Oh, I remember you. 141 00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:28,638 You're Nell's adult roommate. You look even less rugged in the daytime. 142 00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:31,182 And you're Nell's unapproachable, controlling boss. 143 00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,768 Where'd you get your suit? Nancy Reagan's grave? 144 00:06:33,768 --> 00:06:35,645 No, but it is from her collection. 145 00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:38,481 Has anyone ever told you you resemble a stalk of asparagus? 146 00:06:38,481 --> 00:06:40,108 You look like you've eaten all the lemons. 147 00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:42,860 You look like someone who can't eat dairy and loves to tell everyone about it. 148 00:06:42,860 --> 00:06:44,779 You look like you want to talk to my manager. 149 00:06:44,779 --> 00:06:47,073 I'm waiting for my father. He's here to spend the day with me. 150 00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:49,450 - Why are you here? - Nell's leftovers. 151 00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:51,536 Ah. Her cubicle is, um-- 152 00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:55,456 Oh, it's somewhere over there. It's the sticky one. 153 00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:58,042 Good luck saving the grass or whatever it is you care about. 154 00:06:58,042 --> 00:06:59,419 Good luck with the War on Drugs. 155 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,425 All right. So, how's it reading? Is it humming yet? 156 00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,927 Maybe not yet, but, you know, trust the process. 157 00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:10,471 Even with my story about how I ended the minors' strike? 158 00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:11,806 - Mmm. - You understand 159 00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:14,392 when I say minors, I mean children. 160 00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:15,977 - I got that. - Okay. 161 00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:19,772 Um, but, as of now, it's sounding a little less "celebration of life" 162 00:07:19,772 --> 00:07:24,402 and a little more like what a villain says to you as they lower you into a volcano. 163 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:27,363 Well, see, that's-- that's no good. Th-This is my legacy. 164 00:07:27,363 --> 00:07:30,366 This is how people are gonna remember me. 165 00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:33,703 So-- So what do I do? Just-- Just be honest with me, Mel. 166 00:07:34,912 --> 00:07:37,999 Okay. Y-You want me to be honest? 167 00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:40,960 My name is Nell. 168 00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:43,754 - Mel. - Nell. 169 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:47,383 - Nell with-- - Nell, Nell, Nell. 170 00:07:47,383 --> 00:07:48,885 - Yeah. - Oh. 171 00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:52,638 You know, this is either the first time that I've gotten someone's name wrong 172 00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:55,057 or the first time that someone's corrected me. 173 00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:57,685 All right. Tell me more. 174 00:07:57,685 --> 00:08:03,608 Well, I find that people connect most with the-- the simpler things. 175 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:04,650 Ah. 176 00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:09,071 You know, the struggles someone overcomes, um, the good they've done. 177 00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:10,490 Of course, the good-- 178 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,700 Well, that should be easy enough. 179 00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:15,995 - Okay. - How do we put some good in my obituary? 180 00:08:16,662 --> 00:08:19,248 By being good. 181 00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:21,501 - By being good. - Yeah. 182 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,877 Of course. Do you know something? 183 00:08:22,877 --> 00:08:27,340 This is the most fascinating conversation that I've had in my entire life. 184 00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:30,176 - Wow. - I wanna keep talking. 185 00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:31,594 - Come on. - Oh. Okay. 186 00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:33,846 I'll tell you-- tell you what, "By being good." 187 00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:35,389 How do I not know that? 188 00:08:35,389 --> 00:08:37,016 Lexi's dad thinks I'm fascinating. 189 00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:40,603 "Fascinating," he said. How's that for increasing value? 190 00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:44,857 Your neighborhood is on the come-up. Get ready to pay $12 a latte, honey. 191 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,193 Oh. 192 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:52,031 Are you ready for lunch, Father? 193 00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:53,991 I am. I'm going with Nell. 194 00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:58,371 Oh, and that's her name, everyone. So let's stop saying it wrong. 195 00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:01,499 Of course, if she'll have me, that is. 196 00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:05,670 You know what? Lunch sounds great to me, Mr. Rhodes. 197 00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,755 Okay. Your driver or mine? 198 00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:08,965 Uh, yours. 199 00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:10,633 Mine. 200 00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:21,227 Very well. Exactly how I planned and wanted things to happen. 201 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:26,607 Why are you still here? Shouldn't you be milking an almond? 202 00:09:26,607 --> 00:09:27,984 I couldn't find Nell's desk. 203 00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:30,278 She's having lunch with my father, which is fine. 204 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:31,487 Doesn't seem fine. 205 00:09:32,196 --> 00:09:34,740 It seems like you actually have some pretty serious daddy issues. 206 00:09:35,324 --> 00:09:37,952 What do you know? You look like a mop with student loan debt. 207 00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:40,454 You look like you just got fired from Sephora. 208 00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:42,790 Hmm. 209 00:09:56,637 --> 00:09:58,139 So, I've been thinking about this, 210 00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:01,017 and there are some things that you can do to be a better person 211 00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:03,352 and have an impressive obituary... 212 00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:05,771 ...for example, charity. 213 00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:07,356 Oh, yeah. 214 00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:10,651 You know, I've given a-a lot of money to charity over the years. 215 00:10:10,651 --> 00:10:14,614 And, uh, I even gave my entire Malibu estate to my ex-wife. 216 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,115 Yeah, didn't care for it. 217 00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:20,369 Well, m-maybe you'd enjoy, uh, giving to charity 218 00:10:20,369 --> 00:10:23,873 if you gave it to something you love, like, uh, n-name something you love. 219 00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:27,460 - Money. - You wanna donate your money to money? 220 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,795 Yes. And, uh, how does one do that? 221 00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:33,341 That finger better be telling me how many bottles of wine you want in your order, 222 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:36,135 - or you're about to lose that hand. - I am so sorry, Cricket. 223 00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:37,845 Hmm. - Mr. Rhodes is Lexi's dad. 224 00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,056 - That tracks. - Ouch. 225 00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:43,059 Well, I've never had anyone apologize for me before. 226 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,727 - But I love it. - Uh-- 227 00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:46,395 Tell me what I did wrong. 228 00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:49,565 So, when your server approaches, you make eye contact, 229 00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:50,691 - greet them... - Okay. 230 00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:53,235 - ...say something nice. Mm-hmm. - All righty. 231 00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:55,821 Hello, I'd like to buy you a plane. 232 00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:57,323 - Well, no, that's too much. That's-- - No? 233 00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,407 - That was too far. - Okay. 234 00:10:58,407 --> 00:11:00,326 Maybe something more relatable. 235 00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:02,286 Got it. 236 00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:05,748 Yowza, you can do Shakespeare off that balcony. 237 00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:07,792 S-Sorry. 238 00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:10,169 Never-- Never comment on a woman's body. 239 00:11:10,169 --> 00:11:13,005 But body and plane are my two best moves. 240 00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:16,634 You have to make someone feel seen, you know, and appreciated. 241 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:20,304 What am I supposed to do? Compliment her on her shoes? 242 00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:21,389 - Sure. - Yeah. 243 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:23,641 Yeah, that seems safe. Give it a whirl. 244 00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:26,477 I like your shoes. 245 00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:28,187 Thank you. 246 00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:29,271 Look at that. 247 00:11:29,814 --> 00:11:32,233 - Really? It-It's-It's that easy? - Really. 248 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:35,486 Yeah. It might not be building a school for orphans, 249 00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:39,115 but you just made a normal human connection. 250 00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:41,534 Thank you, Nell. 251 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:42,993 You're welcome, Mr. Rhodes. 252 00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:45,579 Oh, congratulations, everybody. 253 00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:46,956 And you owe me a plane. 254 00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:53,045 Please tell me there's more coffee. 255 00:11:53,045 --> 00:11:55,506 It ain't fresh, but it does the trick, am I right? 256 00:11:55,506 --> 00:11:57,425 Amen to that, right? 257 00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,429 - Wait. Why are you here? - I'm kind of on a break. 258 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:03,556 You don't work here. 259 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:04,849 Not on my break I don't. 260 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:08,519 Yeah, I'm not gonna move on from this. Why are you here? 261 00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:12,565 Uh, Sam, Edward is here today because he is my lawyer. 262 00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,150 But he's an environmental lawyer. 263 00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,569 Exactly. I'm currently in litigation with a spruce. 264 00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:19,071 But he is done, and on his way out. 265 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,407 Yeah. Are you okay? 266 00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:24,201 Are you sure today is the best day to start suing trees? 267 00:12:24,201 --> 00:12:28,247 Oh, it's like they say, "There's never a great time to sue a tree." 268 00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:29,457 I'm fine, Sam. 269 00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:30,958 Okay. 270 00:12:30,958 --> 00:12:33,002 Be sure to sign the card for Steve's birthday. 271 00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:34,628 You don't work here. 272 00:12:34,628 --> 00:12:36,088 Why are you still here? 273 00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:40,050 I came for a cup of coffee and to see if you wanted me to 274 00:12:40,050 --> 00:12:42,845 "hug you from behind and navigate the belly button." 275 00:12:42,845 --> 00:12:44,346 Are you referring to earlier in the hallway 276 00:12:44,346 --> 00:12:46,932 when I pinned you against the wall, kissed you hard and you kissed me back? 277 00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:49,560 It was nothing. Forget about it. I have. 278 00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:53,147 I know that laugh. I heard it once before as a child. 279 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,316 I was roller-skating and fell. 280 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,572 What are they laughing about? Is she even funny? 281 00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:05,242 Have you heard her breakfast puns? They are "egg-cellent." 282 00:13:07,244 --> 00:13:10,247 Well, I wanna thank you for a very enlightening day, Nell. 283 00:13:10,247 --> 00:13:12,416 Oh, thank you, Mr. Rhodes. 284 00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:16,670 Ah, Mr. Rhodes is my cat. I named him after me. Call me Duncan. 285 00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:21,675 Thank you, Duncan. I also had a really enlightening day. 286 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,219 And me. 287 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:25,638 You went from a teardown to a modern farmhouse 288 00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,056 in a good school district. 289 00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:31,268 You know, I don't use the term "moxie" often because, uh, well, I don't want to... 290 00:13:32,436 --> 00:13:34,146 ...but I do have to say I think you've got it. 291 00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:37,399 And I'm gonna be giving you a raise. 292 00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:39,819 - Really? - Oh, yeah. 293 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,320 Thank you, Mr. Rhodes. 294 00:13:42,029 --> 00:13:45,783 Wow. I mean, thank you, Duncan. Duncster? 295 00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:47,618 - Too far. - Duncan. 296 00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:49,078 Alexis. 297 00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:52,498 Yes, Father, do-do you need me? 298 00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:54,208 - Ye-- I sure do. - Oh. 299 00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:56,418 I-In the sense that I need your office. 300 00:13:56,418 --> 00:13:58,712 I just gave your Nell here a raise, 301 00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:02,466 and we're gonna go up there and celebrate with Scotch by the fire. 302 00:14:02,466 --> 00:14:04,927 A midday libation. How lovely. 303 00:14:05,427 --> 00:14:08,973 - And I will see you up there in ten, huh? - Mm-hmm. 304 00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:11,058 All right, ding-dong. Get back in there. 305 00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:12,560 Let's do this. Wow. 306 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:14,186 Stop talking. 307 00:14:14,186 --> 00:14:16,063 You're not gonna believe this. 308 00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:18,566 Mr. Rhodes is totally obsessed with me, and he values my opinion, 309 00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:19,984 and he just gave me a raise. 310 00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:22,236 What? Are you joking me right now? Oh, my gosh. 311 00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:24,154 We have to celebrate. You so deserve this. 312 00:14:24,154 --> 00:14:26,448 I smell a shopping trip to Neiman's. 313 00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:29,535 Or maybe to Marshalls. We're still in journalism, so... 314 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:32,037 Either way, I am so proud of you. 315 00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,581 - Thank you. - Oh. 316 00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:36,542 - And now maybe that you have an in... - Uh-huh. 317 00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:40,546 ...you could use that to get him to give Lexi some attention, you know? 318 00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:43,716 Like, deep down, I think she just really wants some attention from her dad. 319 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,803 Mmm, pass. No, she's been a total jerk to me. No. 320 00:14:47,803 --> 00:14:49,763 - I'm gonna take that as a "maybe." Okay? - Huh? 321 00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:52,182 So you can think about it because I'm genuinely worried about her. 322 00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:55,311 Every time I see her, she looks like she's falling apart more and more. 323 00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:57,479 Hello. 324 00:14:58,606 --> 00:14:59,857 She looks all right to me. 325 00:15:00,816 --> 00:15:03,277 Mm-hmm. Oh. 326 00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:05,529 Mmm. 327 00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:10,159 That tastes like an expensive shoe. 328 00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:15,205 You know, my doctor says this is bad for my liver, so I had him killed. 329 00:15:17,082 --> 00:15:20,169 Ah, yes. You're so bad, it's illegal. 330 00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:23,130 Oh, it's so weird relaxing in here. 331 00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:27,176 I'm usually getting yelled at by Lexi or insulted by Lexi 332 00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:29,386 or just having insults yelled at me by Lexi. 333 00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:32,181 Yeah. When you're a Rhodes, you have a lot to live up to. 334 00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,390 Yeah, I bet. 335 00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,107 You know, Duncan, I-- 336 00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,151 I feel kind of bad for Lexi. 337 00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:48,697 I think it's kind of driving her crazy that you're ignoring her for someone else. 338 00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,742 - Oh, it always does. Cheers. - Cheers. 339 00:15:52,743 --> 00:15:55,829 Wait. No cheers. What do you-- What do you mean it always does? 340 00:15:55,829 --> 00:15:57,039 Well, that's how I motivate her. 341 00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:59,792 You see, whenever I think she's slacking, 342 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:04,296 like when she's pleased about a measly 3% increase in circulation, 343 00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:07,800 I find someone who I know gets under her skin, 344 00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:10,344 and I shower them with praise and attention. 345 00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:14,598 That just drives her to work harder to win my affection. 346 00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:16,600 Are you serious? 347 00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:19,728 - That's kind of terrible. - And effective. 348 00:16:19,728 --> 00:16:22,856 One time, when she was underperforming in boarding school, 349 00:16:22,856 --> 00:16:28,028 I befriended her roommate, Sarah. Spent Thanksgiving with her. 350 00:16:28,028 --> 00:16:32,074 God, that kid was so boring. Really into maps. 351 00:16:32,741 --> 00:16:36,537 Anyway, Lexi that year graduated at the top of her class. 352 00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:39,331 So y-you were just using me to manipulate your daughter? 353 00:16:39,331 --> 00:16:41,083 Well, I knew you were perfect 354 00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:46,547 when I saw how nauseated she looked watching you choke down that scone. 355 00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,175 I feel nauseous. 356 00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:02,730 Can't believe I was some pawn in Duncan's weird game. 357 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,482 I obviously can't take that raise. 358 00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:08,652 I'm always gonna be a condo by the airport. 359 00:17:11,822 --> 00:17:14,033 You know that $10 million listing I had? 360 00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:18,120 It had ocean views, wine cellar, infinity pool. 361 00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:20,456 I get it, Teddy Thompson. I get it. 362 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,208 But it also had termites, 363 00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:26,545 a cracked chimney and a crumbling foundation. 364 00:17:27,254 --> 00:17:30,632 When I saw that inspection report, it felt like getting hit by a bus 365 00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:34,553 because I was reading it on my phone when I got hit by a bus. 366 00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:37,181 - Ouch. - The point is, 367 00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:39,433 it doesn't matter how fancy you are on the outside 368 00:17:39,433 --> 00:17:41,226 when your foundation is crumbling. 369 00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:45,731 I can tell you've got a good foundation. 370 00:17:46,940 --> 00:17:48,525 - Do I though? - Yes. 371 00:17:49,485 --> 00:17:51,695 I knew I was taking away Lexi's dad's attention. 372 00:17:51,695 --> 00:17:55,074 I didn't even care. I was so-so focused on feeling valued. 373 00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:58,077 In your defense, you were trying to teach him how to be a better person. 374 00:17:58,577 --> 00:17:59,620 Which I failed at too. 375 00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,539 I didn't get through to him at all. 376 00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,292 He didn't even care about his obituary. 377 00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:09,213 Maybe because he hasn't read it yet. 378 00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,717 Or he can't read. One of the two. 379 00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:18,305 Duncan Wilson Rhodes was a titan of the publishing, vitamin 380 00:18:18,305 --> 00:18:19,973 and light bulb industries. 381 00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:22,976 He was a wildly influential businessman who lived a successful life 382 00:18:22,976 --> 00:18:24,937 by any metric except for one, 383 00:18:25,687 --> 00:18:27,356 his relationships with the people in his life. 384 00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:30,484 ♪ Well, I've been out walking ♪ 385 00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:31,819 He is survived by Alexis, 386 00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:35,155 a former Olympian and current editor of the SoCal Independent. 387 00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:39,326 Alexis particularly strived to attain both her father's business acumen 388 00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:40,536 and his affection. 389 00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:44,123 While she succeeded in the former, she never got the latter 390 00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:47,459 because Duncan's passing came before he could realize 391 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,547 that it's not the business ledgers that really tally the worth of your life. 392 00:18:52,047 --> 00:18:52,881 There you go. 393 00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:55,467 It's the value of the relationships you have with others... 394 00:18:56,218 --> 00:19:01,181 This one goes first because I took it five minutes before this one. 395 00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:04,810 ...and the impact that we have on those people. 396 00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:08,147 Perhaps if Duncan had a chance to do it all again, 397 00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:11,066 he would have diversified his emotional holdings. 398 00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:23,537 - Hello, Father. - Alexis. 399 00:19:24,663 --> 00:19:26,665 I want to apologize for Nell's obituary. 400 00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:29,293 I would cut her pay, but she already makes below a living wage. 401 00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,544 Well, see what you can do. 402 00:19:30,544 --> 00:19:32,421 Also, I've been reviewing our financials, 403 00:19:32,421 --> 00:19:35,674 and I think I can do much better than the 3% circulation increase. 404 00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,843 I have some exciting ideas I could email to you. 405 00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:41,180 Well, I knew you'd find a way. Schedule some time with my secretary. 406 00:19:42,598 --> 00:19:43,599 Alexis. 407 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:45,559 Yes. 408 00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:49,229 I like your shoes. 409 00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,862 - My shoes? - Yeah. 410 00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:01,533 Th-Thank you. 411 00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:05,829 I got them from a cobbler near the palace in Vienna. 412 00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:06,914 Mm-hmm. 413 00:20:13,253 --> 00:20:14,671 That was a wonderful trip. 414 00:20:14,671 --> 00:20:17,758 Oh, you remember that, huh? I do. Never had sauerkraut before. 415 00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:20,052 Or the bratwurst, right? Yes. 416 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,136 You did that. 417 00:20:21,136 --> 00:20:22,221 We did that. 418 00:20:22,846 --> 00:20:25,474 Thank you for reminding me of my value. 419 00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:27,851 Well, as Teddy Thompson always says, 420 00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:30,979 -"Don't just dream it. Own it." -"Own it." 421 00:20:30,979 --> 00:20:34,691 Now can you please finish my obituary? This is the longest showing of my life. 422 00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:43,242 What is going on here? 423 00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:45,619 Oh, this? Just some fond memories. 424 00:20:45,619 --> 00:20:49,414 No, these are-- these are things that Lexi took off everyone else's desk. 425 00:20:49,414 --> 00:20:51,416 Yeah. This is Jeff's family. 426 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:53,085 They're my family now. 427 00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:57,339 And this is my turkey drawing made with Dominic's son's tiny little handprint. 428 00:20:57,339 --> 00:20:59,633 {\an8}I love the decor. 429 00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:03,220 {\an8}And you were a Navy SEAL. Thank you for your service. 430 00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:04,429 {\an8}You got it. 431 00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:07,557 {\an8}These items belong to other people in the office. She stole them. 432 00:21:08,141 --> 00:21:11,019 {\an8}Oh, do-gooder over here. Every office has one. 433 00:21:11,019 --> 00:21:13,188 {\an8}Try sitting across from her every day. 434 00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:15,148 {\an8}- Blah, blah, blah. Nobody's there. - You are funny. 435 00:21:15,148 --> 00:21:16,942 {\an8}I know, right? 436 00:21:16,942 --> 00:21:19,486 {\an8}Oh. I'd like to take you to lunch. What's your name? 437 00:21:19,486 --> 00:21:22,197 {\an8}- Tina. - Wonderful. Come on, Nina. 438 00:21:23,031 --> 00:21:24,449 {\an8}Uh-- It doesn't even matter.