1
00:00:02,544 --> 00:00:06,297
"Teddy Thompson, Pasadena's
number one real estate agent.
2
00:00:06,297 --> 00:00:07,424
Don't just dream it.
3
00:00:07,424 --> 00:00:09,342
- Own it."
- Own it! [laughs]
4
00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:12,053
That picture's plastered on the side
of every bus in town.
5
00:00:12,053 --> 00:00:13,221
- [chuckles]
- Mmm.
6
00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:15,348
Ironic that yesterday I got plastered
on the front of one.
7
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:18,435
Ooh, well, I will not use the word
"plastered" in your obituary.
8
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:20,895
Uh, "splattered"? Oh, I'll work on it.
9
00:00:20,895 --> 00:00:23,273
So this is a real fixer-upper.
10
00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:24,566
When are you gonna fix it?
11
00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:26,985
Morning, Nell.
Haven't received your rent yet.
12
00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:31,406
Also, there is something aggressively
stinking up your side of the refrigerator.
13
00:00:31,406 --> 00:00:35,994
Oh, sorry. I-- I don't have
any more checks or money.
14
00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:38,288
And, um, that smell is a combination
15
00:00:38,288 --> 00:00:40,707
of leftover soups from last week
I'm gonna have for lunch today.
16
00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:44,502
Gross. Just make sure you remove
your Frankensoups from the apartment
17
00:00:44,502 --> 00:00:46,296
on your way to work,
which is none of my business,
18
00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:48,339
but I do think that should've been,
like, 20 minutes ago.
19
00:00:48,339 --> 00:00:51,301
{\an8}What? What? No. Damn it! Ugh!
20
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,261
{\an8}So, you're a renter?
21
00:00:53,261 --> 00:00:55,847
I just don't think
I can represent you. [chuckles]
22
00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:59,184
When I died, I was this close
to closing on a $10 million listing.
23
00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:01,227
I'm strictly in the luxury market.
24
00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:03,646
What kind of property am I?
25
00:01:03,646 --> 00:01:06,191
A condo near the airport
whose value is depreciating.
26
00:01:06,941 --> 00:01:08,359
I am not depreciating.
27
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:11,279
If you could send it out for me,
that would be great. Thank you.
28
00:01:11,279 --> 00:01:13,156
- Sam! Ugh.
- Hey!
29
00:01:13,156 --> 00:01:14,991
- Sam, am I depreciating?
- Mm-hmm?
30
00:01:14,991 --> 00:01:17,869
Oh, is this a skin care thing?
Because if so, I have an off-brand retinol
31
00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:20,497
that'll just burn an entire layer off
of your face by Monday.
32
00:01:20,497 --> 00:01:22,916
Ooh, no. Ah. I mean, metaphorically.
33
00:01:22,916 --> 00:01:25,668
I-I-I'm afraid I might be growing
mold in my basement.
34
00:01:25,668 --> 00:01:27,879
Oh, yeah, honey. I don't think
I have a cream for that.
35
00:01:27,879 --> 00:01:30,465
I've been here for a year, you know.
Do they consider me an asset?
36
00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:34,552
What? Of course they do.
You are smart, you are fun to be around,
37
00:01:34,552 --> 00:01:37,305
and you are the only one
strong enough to lift the Sparkletts.
38
00:01:37,305 --> 00:01:40,308
All right, people, listen up.
It's time for some housecleaning.
39
00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:44,479
Now, my father, the owner and publisher of
this paper, the reason you're all alive,
40
00:01:44,479 --> 00:01:48,233
is coming here today,
and everything needs to be perfect.
41
00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:50,318
I'm not stressed. You're not stressed.
Nobody's stressed.
42
00:01:50,318 --> 00:01:53,279
All right? So why don't we just all
clear our cubicles
43
00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:56,116
of any unprofessional
and non-news-related personal effects?
44
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,159
What is this? "Live, laugh, love."
45
00:01:58,159 --> 00:02:00,078
More like, "Barf, barf, barf."
46
00:02:01,996 --> 00:02:04,707
Sam, can I stash a couple photos
of the kids in here?
47
00:02:04,707 --> 00:02:07,585
They're adorable and joyful,
everything Mr. Rhodes hates.
48
00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:09,379
- Yeah, sure. Bring it in.
- [Dennis] Okay.
49
00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:10,880
- [Sam] Oh, God.
- [Dennis] What?
50
00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,966
Dennis, you've been fostering
for a couple of months.
51
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,676
How do you have so many pictures?
52
00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:16,386
I just want to capture every moment.
53
00:02:16,386 --> 00:02:17,679
- [chuckles] Look at this.
- Okay.
54
00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,389
It's the first day Ben and I
brought them home.
55
00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:20,598
- Very sweet.
- Yeah.
56
00:02:20,598 --> 00:02:22,267
- First time in the living room.
- [Nell] Well...
57
00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:24,018
First time in the dining room.
58
00:02:24,018 --> 00:02:26,020
Oh. First time in the hallway. [sobs]
59
00:02:26,020 --> 00:02:27,355
Okay, sweetheart. Get it together.
60
00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,399
- Parenting is not that great.
- Sam. Dennis.
61
00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:31,067
Here are the binders you'll need
62
00:02:31,067 --> 00:02:33,778
for the major presentation
I've prepared for my father.
63
00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:35,989
Ooh, this is a chance for you
to increase your value.
64
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:37,866
- Ask for a binder.
- Can I have a binder?
65
00:02:37,866 --> 00:02:39,742
[gasps] Nell, oh, you surprised me.
66
00:02:39,742 --> 00:02:41,911
You're always lurking about
like a little church mouse.
67
00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:43,329
What do you need a binder for?
68
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:46,666
I'd like to be in the meeting. I have
a decade of journalistic experience.
69
00:02:46,666 --> 00:02:48,877
I-I think I could bring
some value to the table.
70
00:02:51,045 --> 00:02:52,463
Nell, over the past year,
71
00:02:52,463 --> 00:02:57,552
I've come to know you as a friend to Sam
and also an acquaintance/employee to me.
72
00:02:57,552 --> 00:02:59,262
So I don't want you
to take this the wrong way,
73
00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:02,599
but it's just that my father needs to see
the very best of the paper,
74
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:03,892
and you are, um--
75
00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,310
- The worst.
- [Lexi chuckles]
76
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:08,897
[scoffs] That wasn't very nice, Mason.
77
00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:11,107
Ah, what a scamp.
Come on, A-team. Let's go.
78
00:03:11,107 --> 00:03:13,401
- Mason got a binder?
- I don't know. I'm so sorry.
79
00:03:22,243 --> 00:03:23,453
{\an8}[elevator dings]
80
00:03:30,793 --> 00:03:32,587
{\an8}Good morning, everyone.
81
00:03:32,587 --> 00:03:35,381
{\an8}Great to see you again
if we've met before.
82
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:37,842
{\an8}Wow, nice shirt.
We're gonna buy you a mirror.
83
00:03:37,842 --> 00:03:39,469
{\an8}- I'll remove it, sir.
- Good call.
84
00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:40,970
{\an8}It's a pleasure to see you, Father.
85
00:03:40,970 --> 00:03:45,516
{\an8}Alexis. You're looking as stern as your
grandmother more and more every day.
86
00:03:45,516 --> 00:03:46,893
{\an8}And you look wealthy, Father.
87
00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:47,977
{\an8}[Mr. Rhodes chuckles]
88
00:03:49,604 --> 00:03:51,356
{\an8}- [Lexi] Mmm. [chuckles]
- [grunts]
89
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:52,440
{\an8}[Lexi] I'm excited you're here
90
00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:56,152
{\an8}to review the progress of the crown jewel
of the Rhodes family corporate holdings.
91
00:03:56,152 --> 00:03:58,279
{\an8}I have put together
a thorough presentation
92
00:03:58,279 --> 00:04:01,366
{\an8}with some of my top people
and their giant binders.
93
00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:02,909
{\an8}They're-- They're very heavy.
94
00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:08,122
{\an8}No spoilers, but I'm also excited
to tell you that circulation is up 3%.
95
00:04:08,122 --> 00:04:11,000
{\an8}Ah, 3%, like the milk.
96
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,962
{\an8}- Yes.
- [Nell coughing]
97
00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:15,088
{\an8}[clears throat, coughs]
98
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,257
{\an8}Step away from my father's array
of special treats.
99
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:19,592
{\an8}Sorry, these scones are so dry.
100
00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:21,052
{\an8}It's like eating a bath bomb.
101
00:04:22,053 --> 00:04:24,097
{\an8}And who is that with the crumbs?
102
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:27,100
{\an8}Oh, she's just the obituary writer.
She has no binder.
103
00:04:27,684 --> 00:04:28,810
{\an8}It's still in my throat.
104
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:32,605
{\an8}You know, actually,
she is the one that I came here to see.
105
00:04:33,189 --> 00:04:34,065
{\an8}Did he say me?
106
00:04:34,065 --> 00:04:38,194
{\an8}You see, I've been reflecting
on my very important life lately,
107
00:04:38,194 --> 00:04:41,656
{\an8}and I think it's time to consider
what the world will read about me
108
00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:42,991
{\an8}when I'm gone.
109
00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:45,201
{\an8}Titan. Maverick.
110
00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,203
{\an8}Titan of all mavericks.
111
00:04:47,203 --> 00:04:49,664
{\an8}See, these are all words
used to describe me.
112
00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:51,666
{\an8}Of course. Accurate ones at that.
113
00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:55,086
{\an8}Yep. You know what? Finish up
whatever you're doing with your mouth,
114
00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:56,796
{\an8}and, uh, let's get to work, huh?
115
00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:59,382
{\an8}[stutters] But Nell is one
of our more insignificant workers.
116
00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:01,968
{\an8}If you wanted to work with one
of our more significant people, uh,
117
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,052
{\an8}me's available. [chuckles]
118
00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:04,387
{\an8}Ah, no need, darling.
119
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:07,348
{\an8}I'm gonna talk to Mel.
120
00:05:07,348 --> 00:05:09,183
{\an8}- [whispers] "I'll just talk to Mel."
- Mm-hmm.
121
00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:11,811
{\an8}Oh. [chuckles]
122
00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:15,606
{\an8}It is very nice to finally meet you,
Mr. Rhodes. You have a lovely newspaper.
123
00:05:15,606 --> 00:05:19,610
{\an8}Aw, well, it's nice to meet you as well.
And I haven't read your writing yet,
124
00:05:19,610 --> 00:05:22,947
but judging from your hands,
you're a really hard worker.
125
00:05:22,947 --> 00:05:24,991
Thanks. I have seasonal eczema.
126
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:26,075
[Mr. Rhodes] Ah.
127
00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,329
So, let me ask you, how does this work?
128
00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:33,291
Do I, uh, dictate to you?
Do I act out scenes?
129
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:37,754
Oh, uh, typically, you know,
I do some research, talk to loved ones.
130
00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:39,297
Could you get that for me?
131
00:05:44,093 --> 00:05:45,094
Whew.
132
00:05:45,094 --> 00:05:48,181
Okay. So, tell me what might be
133
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:50,641
the first thing you want people to know
about you when you're gone.
134
00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:54,354
Oh, wow. I'm really not good off the t--
top of my head.
135
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:55,938
In 1987,
136
00:05:55,938 --> 00:06:01,361
I acquired two of the most dominant
light bulb retail chains in America,
137
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:04,238
The Light Bulb Plus
and The Light Bulb Stop,
138
00:06:04,238 --> 00:06:08,826
and I merged them into Light Bulb Chalet.
139
00:06:09,410 --> 00:06:11,746
Okay. That's pretty good.
140
00:06:11,746 --> 00:06:14,207
And it cut 2,000 jobs nationwide.
141
00:06:15,541 --> 00:06:17,460
I'm sure they all just went
back to school.
142
00:06:21,506 --> 00:06:23,549
[sniffs] What's that smell?
143
00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:25,802
Oh, I remember you.
144
00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:28,638
You're Nell's adult roommate.
You look even less rugged in the daytime.
145
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:31,182
And you're Nell's unapproachable,
controlling boss.
146
00:06:31,724 --> 00:06:33,768
Where'd you get your suit?
Nancy Reagan's grave?
147
00:06:33,768 --> 00:06:35,645
No, but it is from her collection.
148
00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:38,481
Has anyone ever told you
you resemble a stalk of asparagus?
149
00:06:38,481 --> 00:06:40,108
You look like you've eaten all the lemons.
150
00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:42,860
You look like someone who can't eat
dairy and loves to tell everyone about it.
151
00:06:42,860 --> 00:06:44,779
You look like you want to talk
to my manager.
152
00:06:44,779 --> 00:06:47,073
I'm waiting for my father.
He's here to spend the day with me.
153
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:49,450
- Why are you here?
- Nell's leftovers.
154
00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:51,536
Ah. Her cubicle is, um--
155
00:06:52,620 --> 00:06:55,456
Oh, it's somewhere over there.
It's the sticky one.
156
00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:58,042
Good luck saving the grass
or whatever it is you care about.
157
00:06:58,042 --> 00:06:59,419
Good luck with the War on Drugs.
158
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,425
All right. So, how's it reading?
Is it humming yet?
159
00:07:05,425 --> 00:07:07,927
Maybe not yet, but, you know,
trust the process.
160
00:07:07,927 --> 00:07:10,471
Even with my story about
how I ended the minors' strike?
161
00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:11,806
- Mmm.
- You understand
162
00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:14,392
when I say minors, I mean children.
163
00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:15,977
- I got that.
- Okay.
164
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:19,772
Um, but, as of now, it's sounding
a little less "celebration of life"
165
00:07:19,772 --> 00:07:24,402
and a little more like what a villain says
to you as they lower you into a volcano.
166
00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:27,363
Well, see, that's-- that's no good.
Th-This is my legacy.
167
00:07:27,363 --> 00:07:30,366
This is how people are gonna remember me.
168
00:07:30,366 --> 00:07:33,703
So-- So what do I do?
Just-- Just be honest with me, Mel.
169
00:07:34,912 --> 00:07:37,999
Okay. Y-You want me to be honest?
170
00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:40,960
My name is Nell.
171
00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:43,754
- Mel.
- Nell.
172
00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:47,383
- Nell with--
- Nell, Nell, Nell.
173
00:07:47,383 --> 00:07:48,885
- Yeah.
- Oh. [laughs]
174
00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:52,638
You know, this is either the first time
that I've gotten someone's name wrong
175
00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:55,057
or the first time
that someone's corrected me.
176
00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:56,100
[both chuckle]
177
00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:57,685
All right. Tell me more.
178
00:07:57,685 --> 00:08:03,608
Well, I find that people connect most
with the-- the simpler things.
179
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:04,650
Ah.
180
00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:09,071
You know, the struggles someone overcomes,
um, the good they've done. [chuckles]
181
00:08:09,071 --> 00:08:10,490
Of course, the good--
182
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,700
Well, that should be easy enough.
183
00:08:12,700 --> 00:08:15,995
- Okay.
- How do we put some good in my obituary?
184
00:08:16,662 --> 00:08:19,248
By being good.
185
00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:21,501
- By being good.
- Yeah.
186
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:22,877
Of course. Do you know something?
187
00:08:22,877 --> 00:08:27,340
This is the most fascinating conversation
that I've had in my entire life.
188
00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:30,176
- Wow.
- I wanna keep talking.
189
00:08:30,176 --> 00:08:31,594
- Come on.
- Oh. Okay.
190
00:08:31,594 --> 00:08:33,846
I'll tell you-- tell you what,
"By being good."
191
00:08:33,846 --> 00:08:35,389
[chuckling] How do I not know that?
192
00:08:35,389 --> 00:08:37,016
Lexi's dad thinks I'm fascinating.
193
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:40,603
"Fascinating," he said.
How's that for increasing value?
194
00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:44,857
Your neighborhood is on the come-up.
Get ready to pay $12 a latte, honey.
195
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,193
Oh.
196
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:52,031
Are you ready for lunch, Father?
197
00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:53,991
I am. I'm going with Nell.
198
00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:58,371
Oh, and that's her name, everyone.
So let's stop saying it wrong.
199
00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:01,499
Of course, if she'll have me, that is.
200
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:05,670
[stutters] You know what?
Lunch sounds great to me, Mr. Rhodes.
201
00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,755
Okay. Your driver or mine?
202
00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:08,965
Uh, yours.
203
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:10,633
[chuckles] Mine.
204
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:21,227
Very well. Exactly how I planned
and wanted things to happen.
205
00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:26,607
Why are you still here?
Shouldn't you be milking an almond?
206
00:09:26,607 --> 00:09:27,984
I couldn't find Nell's desk.
207
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:30,278
She's having lunch with my father,
which is fine.
208
00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:31,487
Doesn't seem fine.
209
00:09:32,196 --> 00:09:34,740
It seems like you actually have
some pretty serious daddy issues.
210
00:09:35,324 --> 00:09:37,952
What do you know? You look like a mop
with student loan debt.
211
00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:40,454
You look like you just got fired
from Sephora.
212
00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:42,790
Hmm.
213
00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,292
[Lexi groans]
214
00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:51,340
[sighs]
215
00:09:56,637 --> 00:09:58,139
So, I've been thinking about this,
216
00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:01,017
and there are some things that you can do
to be a better person
217
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:03,352
and have an impressive obituary...
[smacks lips]
218
00:10:03,352 --> 00:10:05,771
...for example, charity.
219
00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:07,356
Oh, yeah.
220
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:10,651
You know, I've given a-a lot of money
to charity over the years.
221
00:10:10,651 --> 00:10:14,614
And, uh, I even gave
my entire Malibu estate to my ex-wife.
222
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,115
Yeah, didn't care for it.
223
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:20,369
Well, m-maybe you'd enjoy,
uh, giving to charity
224
00:10:20,369 --> 00:10:23,873
if you gave it to something you love,
like, uh, n-name something you love.
225
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:27,460
- Money.
- You wanna donate your money to money?
226
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,795
Yes. And, uh, how does one do that?
227
00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:33,341
That finger better be telling me how many
bottles of wine you want in your order,
228
00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:36,135
- or you're about to lose that hand.
- I am so sorry, Cricket.
229
00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:37,845
- [Cricket] Hmm.
- Mr. Rhodes is Lexi's dad.
230
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,056
- That tracks.
- Ouch.
231
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:43,059
Well, I've never had anyone
apologize for me before.
232
00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:44,727
- But I love it. [chuckles]
- Uh-- [chuckles]
233
00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:46,395
Tell me what I did wrong.
234
00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:49,565
So, when your server approaches,
you make eye contact,
235
00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:50,691
- greet them...
- Okay.
236
00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:53,235
- ...say something nice. Mm-hmm.
- All righty.
237
00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:55,821
Hello, I'd like to buy you a plane.
238
00:10:55,821 --> 00:10:57,323
- Well, no, that's too much. That's--
- No?
239
00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,407
- That was too far.
- Okay.
240
00:10:58,407 --> 00:11:00,326
Maybe something more relatable.
241
00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:02,286
- Got it.
- [Cricket clears throat]
242
00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:05,748
Yowza, you can do Shakespeare
off that balcony.
243
00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:07,792
[groans] S-Sorry.
244
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:10,169
Never-- Never comment on a woman's body.
245
00:11:10,169 --> 00:11:13,005
But body and plane are my two best moves.
246
00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:16,634
You have to make someone feel seen,
you know, and appreciated.
247
00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:20,304
What am I supposed to do?
Compliment her on her shoes?
248
00:11:20,304 --> 00:11:21,389
- Sure.
- Yeah.
249
00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:23,641
Yeah, that seems safe. Give it a whirl.
250
00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:26,477
I like your shoes.
251
00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:28,187
Thank you.
252
00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:29,271
Look at that.
253
00:11:29,814 --> 00:11:32,233
- Really? It-It's-It's that easy?
- Really.
254
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:35,486
Yeah. It might not be building
a school for orphans,
255
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:39,115
but you just made
a normal human connection.
256
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:41,534
Thank you, Nell.
257
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:42,993
You're welcome, Mr. Rhodes.
258
00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:45,579
Oh, congratulations, everybody.
259
00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:46,956
And you owe me a plane.
260
00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:53,045
Please tell me there's more coffee.
261
00:11:53,045 --> 00:11:55,506
It ain't fresh, but it does the trick,
am I right?
262
00:11:55,506 --> 00:11:57,425
Amen to that, right?
263
00:11:59,385 --> 00:12:01,429
- Wait. Why are you here?
- I'm kind of on a break.
264
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:03,556
You don't work here.
265
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:04,849
Not on my break I don't.
266
00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:08,519
[chuckles] Yeah, I'm not gonna move on
from this. Why are you here?
267
00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:12,565
Uh, Sam, Edward is here today
because he is my lawyer.
268
00:12:12,565 --> 00:12:14,150
But he's an environmental lawyer.
269
00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:16,569
Exactly. I'm currently
in litigation with a spruce.
270
00:12:16,569 --> 00:12:19,071
But he is done, and on his way out.
271
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,407
Yeah. Are you okay?
272
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:24,201
Are you sure today is the best day
to start suing trees?
273
00:12:24,201 --> 00:12:28,247
Oh, it's like they say, "There's never
a great time to sue a tree." [chuckles]
274
00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:29,457
I'm fine, Sam.
275
00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:30,958
Okay.
276
00:12:30,958 --> 00:12:33,002
Be sure to sign the card
for Steve's birthday.
277
00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:34,628
[Sam] You don't work here.
278
00:12:34,628 --> 00:12:36,088
Why are you still here?
279
00:12:36,088 --> 00:12:40,050
I came for a cup of coffee
and to see if you wanted me to
280
00:12:40,050 --> 00:12:42,845
"hug you from behind
and navigate the belly button."
281
00:12:42,845 --> 00:12:44,346
Are you referring to earlier
in the hallway
282
00:12:44,346 --> 00:12:46,932
when I pinned you against the wall,
kissed you hard and you kissed me back?
283
00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:49,560
- It was nothing. Forget about it. I have.
- [Mr. Rhodes laughs]
284
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:53,147
I know that laugh.
I heard it once before as a child.
285
00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:55,316
I was roller-skating and fell.
286
00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,572
What are they laughing about?
Is she even funny?
287
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:05,242
Have you heard her breakfast puns?
They are "egg-cellent."
288
00:13:07,244 --> 00:13:10,247
Well, I wanna thank you
for a very enlightening day, Nell.
289
00:13:10,247 --> 00:13:12,416
Oh, thank you, Mr. Rhodes.
290
00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:16,670
Ah, Mr. Rhodes is my cat.
I named him after me. Call me Duncan.
291
00:13:17,838 --> 00:13:21,675
Thank you, Duncan.
I also had a really enlightening day.
292
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,219
And me.
293
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:25,638
You went from a teardown
to a modern farmhouse
294
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,056
in a good school district.
295
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:31,268
You know, I don't use the term "moxie"
often because, uh, well, I don't want to...
296
00:13:31,268 --> 00:13:32,436
[chuckles]
297
00:13:32,436 --> 00:13:34,146
...but I do have to say
I think you've got it.
298
00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:37,399
And I'm gonna be giving you a raise.
299
00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:39,819
- Really?
- Oh, yeah.
300
00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,320
Thank you, Mr. Rhodes.
301
00:13:42,029 --> 00:13:45,783
Wow. I mean, thank you, Duncan. Duncster?
302
00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:47,618
- Too far.
- Duncan.
303
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:49,078
Alexis.
304
00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:52,498
Yes, Father, do-do you need me?
305
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:54,208
- Ye-- I sure do.
- Oh.
306
00:13:54,208 --> 00:13:56,418
I-In the sense that I need your office.
307
00:13:56,418 --> 00:13:58,712
I just gave your Nell here a raise,
308
00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:02,466
and we're gonna go up there
and celebrate with Scotch by the fire.
309
00:14:02,466 --> 00:14:04,927
A midday libation. How lovely.
310
00:14:05,427 --> 00:14:08,973
- And I will see you up there in ten, huh?
- Mm-hmm.
311
00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:11,058
[Lexi sighs] All right, ding-dong.
Get back in there.
312
00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:12,560
- Let's do this.
- [Edward] Wow.
313
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:14,186
- [speaks indistinctly]
- [Lexi] Stop talking.
314
00:14:14,186 --> 00:14:16,063
[giggles] You're not gonna believe this.
315
00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:18,566
Mr. Rhodes is totally obsessed with me,
and he values my opinion,
316
00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:19,984
and he just gave me a raise.
317
00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:22,236
What? Are you joking me right now?
[gasps] Oh, my gosh.
318
00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:24,154
We have to celebrate. You so deserve this.
319
00:14:24,154 --> 00:14:26,448
I smell a shopping trip to Neiman's.
320
00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:29,535
Or maybe to Marshalls.
We're still in journalism, so...
321
00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:32,037
- [Nell squeals]
- Either way, I am so proud of you.
322
00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,581
- Thank you.
- Oh.
323
00:14:33,581 --> 00:14:36,542
- And now maybe that you have an in...
- Uh-huh.
324
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:40,546
...you could use that to get him
to give Lexi some attention, you know?
325
00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:43,716
Like, deep down, I think she just really
wants some attention from her dad.
326
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,803
Mmm, pass. No, she's been
a total jerk to me. No.
327
00:14:47,803 --> 00:14:49,763
- I'm gonna take that as a "maybe." Okay?
- Huh?
328
00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:52,182
So you can think about it
because I'm genuinely worried about her.
329
00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:55,311
Every time I see her, she looks like
she's falling apart more and more.
330
00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:57,479
Hello.
331
00:14:58,606 --> 00:14:59,857
She looks all right to me.
332
00:15:00,816 --> 00:15:03,277
[Nell chuckles] Mm-hmm. Oh.
333
00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:05,529
[Mr. Rhodes] Mmm.
334
00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:10,159
[exhales] That tastes
like an expensive shoe.
335
00:15:10,159 --> 00:15:15,205
You know, my doctor says this is bad
for my liver, so I had him killed.
336
00:15:17,082 --> 00:15:20,169
Ah, yes. You're so bad, it's illegal.
337
00:15:20,669 --> 00:15:23,130
Oh, it's so weird relaxing in here.
338
00:15:23,130 --> 00:15:27,176
I'm usually getting yelled at by Lexi
or insulted by Lexi
339
00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:29,386
or just having insults
yelled at me by Lexi.
340
00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:32,181
Yeah. When you're a Rhodes,
you have a lot to live up to.
341
00:15:32,181 --> 00:15:33,390
Yeah, I bet.
342
00:15:34,725 --> 00:15:35,935
[sighs]
343
00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,107
You know, Duncan, I-- [sighs]
344
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:44,151
I feel kind of bad for Lexi.
345
00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:48,697
I think it's kind of driving her crazy
that you're ignoring her for someone else.
346
00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,742
- Oh, it always does. Cheers.
- Cheers.
347
00:15:52,743 --> 00:15:55,829
Wait. No cheers. What do you--
What do you mean it always does?
348
00:15:55,829 --> 00:15:57,039
Well, that's how I motivate her.
349
00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:59,792
You see, whenever I think she's slacking,
350
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:04,296
like when she's pleased about
a measly 3% increase in circulation,
351
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:07,800
I find someone who
I know gets under her skin,
352
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:10,344
and I shower them
with praise and attention.
353
00:16:10,344 --> 00:16:14,598
That just drives her to work harder
to win my affection.
354
00:16:15,182 --> 00:16:16,600
Are you serious?
355
00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:19,728
- That's kind of terrible.
- And effective.
356
00:16:19,728 --> 00:16:22,856
One time, when she was underperforming
in boarding school,
357
00:16:22,856 --> 00:16:28,028
I befriended her roommate, Sarah.
Spent Thanksgiving with her.
358
00:16:28,028 --> 00:16:32,074
God, that kid was so boring.
Really into maps.
359
00:16:32,741 --> 00:16:36,537
Anyway, Lexi that year graduated
at the top of her class.
360
00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:39,331
So y-you were just using me
to manipulate your daughter?
361
00:16:39,331 --> 00:16:41,083
Well, I knew you were perfect
362
00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:46,547
when I saw how nauseated she looked
watching you choke down that scone.
363
00:16:46,547 --> 00:16:47,631
[chuckles]
364
00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,175
I feel nauseous.
365
00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:02,730
[sighs] Can't believe I was some pawn
in Duncan's weird game.
366
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,482
I obviously can't take that raise.
367
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:08,652
I'm always gonna be
a condo by the airport.
368
00:17:08,652 --> 00:17:10,320
[Teddy sighs]
369
00:17:11,822 --> 00:17:14,033
You know that $10 million listing I had?
370
00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:18,120
It had ocean views,
wine cellar, infinity pool.
371
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:20,456
I get it, Teddy Thompson. I get it.
372
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,208
But it also had termites,
373
00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:26,545
a cracked chimney
and a crumbling foundation. [chuckles]
374
00:17:27,254 --> 00:17:30,632
When I saw that inspection report,
it felt like getting hit by a bus
375
00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:34,553
because I was reading it on my phone
when I got hit by a bus.
376
00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:37,181
- Ouch.
- The point is,
377
00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:39,433
it doesn't matter how fancy
you are on the outside
378
00:17:39,433 --> 00:17:41,226
when your foundation is crumbling.
379
00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:45,731
I can tell you've got a good foundation.
380
00:17:46,940 --> 00:17:48,525
- Do I though?
- Yes.
381
00:17:49,485 --> 00:17:51,695
I knew I was taking away
Lexi's dad's attention.
382
00:17:51,695 --> 00:17:55,074
I didn't even care.
I was so-so focused on feeling valued.
383
00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:58,077
In your defense, you were trying to
teach him how to be a better person.
384
00:17:58,577 --> 00:17:59,620
Which I failed at too.
385
00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,539
I didn't get through to him at all.
386
00:18:03,457 --> 00:18:05,292
He didn't even care about his obituary.
387
00:18:07,419 --> 00:18:09,213
Maybe because he hasn't read it yet.
388
00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,717
Or he can't read. One of the two.
389
00:18:14,551 --> 00:18:15,636
["These Days" playing]
390
00:18:15,636 --> 00:18:18,305
[Nell] Duncan Wilson Rhodes was
a titan of the publishing, vitamin
391
00:18:18,305 --> 00:18:19,973
and light bulb industries.
392
00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:22,976
He was a wildly influential businessman
who lived a successful life
393
00:18:22,976 --> 00:18:24,937
by any metric except for one,
394
00:18:25,687 --> 00:18:27,356
his relationships
with the people in his life.
395
00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:28,482
[phone dings]
396
00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:30,484
♪ Well, I've been out walking ♪
397
00:18:30,484 --> 00:18:31,819
[Nell] He is survived by Alexis,
398
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:35,155
a former Olympian and current editor
of the SoCal Independent.
399
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:39,326
Alexis particularly strived to attain both
her father's business acumen
400
00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:40,536
and his affection.
401
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:44,123
While she succeeded in the former,
she never got the latter
402
00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:47,459
because Duncan's passing came
before he could realize
403
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,547
that it's not the business ledgers
that really tally the worth of your life.
404
00:18:52,047 --> 00:18:52,881
There you go.
405
00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:55,467
[Nell] It's the value of the relationships
you have with others...
406
00:18:56,218 --> 00:19:01,181
This one goes first because
I took it five minutes before this one.
407
00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:04,810
[Nell] ...and the impact
that we have on those people.
408
00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:08,147
Perhaps if Duncan had a chance
to do it all again,
409
00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:11,066
he would have diversified
his emotional holdings.
410
00:19:16,780 --> 00:19:18,991
[music fades out]
411
00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:23,537
- Hello, Father.
- Alexis.
412
00:19:24,663 --> 00:19:26,665
I want to apologize for Nell's obituary.
413
00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:29,293
I would cut her pay,
but she already makes below a living wage.
414
00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,544
Well, see what you can do.
415
00:19:30,544 --> 00:19:32,421
Also, I've been reviewing our financials,
416
00:19:32,421 --> 00:19:35,674
and I think I can do much better than
the 3% circulation increase.
417
00:19:35,674 --> 00:19:37,843
I have some exciting ideas
I could email to you.
418
00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:41,180
Well, I knew you'd find a way.
Schedule some time with my secretary.
419
00:19:42,598 --> 00:19:43,599
Alexis.
420
00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:45,559
Yes.
421
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:49,229
I like your shoes.
422
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,862
- My shoes?
- Yeah.
423
00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:01,533
Th-Thank you.
424
00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:05,829
I got them from a cobbler
near the palace in Vienna.
425
00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:06,914
Mm-hmm.
426
00:20:06,914 --> 00:20:08,707
[speaking German]
427
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:12,502
- [speaking German, giggles]
- [giggles, sighs]
428
00:20:13,253 --> 00:20:14,671
[Lexi] That was a wonderful trip.
429
00:20:14,671 --> 00:20:17,758
- [Mr. Rhodes] Oh, you remember that, huh?
- [Lexi] I do. Never had sauerkraut before.
430
00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:20,052
- [Mr. Rhodes] Or the bratwurst, right?
- [Lexi chuckles] Yes.
431
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,136
You did that.
432
00:20:21,136 --> 00:20:22,221
We did that.
433
00:20:22,846 --> 00:20:25,474
Thank you for reminding me of my value.
434
00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:27,851
Well, as Teddy Thompson always says,
435
00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:30,979
-"Don't just dream it. Own it." [chuckles]
-"Own it."
436
00:20:30,979 --> 00:20:34,691
Now can you please finish my obituary?
This is the longest showing of my life.
437
00:20:41,156 --> 00:20:43,242
What is going on here?
438
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:45,619
Oh, this? Just some fond memories.
439
00:20:45,619 --> 00:20:49,414
No, these are-- these are things
that Lexi took off everyone else's desk.
440
00:20:49,414 --> 00:20:51,416
Yeah. This is Jeff's family.
441
00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:53,085
They're my family now.
442
00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:57,339
And this is my turkey drawing made with
Dominic's son's tiny little handprint.
443
00:20:57,339 --> 00:20:59,633
{\an8}I love the decor.
444
00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:03,220
{\an8}And you were a Navy SEAL.
Thank you for your service.
445
00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:04,429
{\an8}You got it.
446
00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:07,557
{\an8}These items belong to other people
in the office. She stole them.
447
00:21:08,141 --> 00:21:11,019
{\an8}Oh, do-gooder over here.
Every office has one.
448
00:21:11,019 --> 00:21:13,188
{\an8}Try sitting across from her every day.
449
00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:15,148
{\an8}- Blah, blah, blah. Nobody's there.
- You are funny.
450
00:21:15,148 --> 00:21:16,942
{\an8}- I know, right?
- [Mr. Rhodes chuckles]
451
00:21:16,942 --> 00:21:19,486
{\an8}Oh. I'd like to take you to lunch.
What's your name?
452
00:21:19,486 --> 00:21:22,197
{\an8}- Tina.
- Wonderful. Come on, Nina.
453
00:21:23,031 --> 00:21:24,449
{\an8}Uh-- It doesn't even matter.