1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:03,720 THEY GASP 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:05,280 Don't I look sexy? 3 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:07,080 The woman on the counter did it for free. 4 00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:09,200 All I had to do was buy all the products. 5 00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:12,640 Come on, love, go and put something nice on. 6 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:14,800 Go and put on that dress that I looked out for you. 7 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:18,400 Check her legs. 8 00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:22,800 THEY GASP 9 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:24,920 Pin her down! Stop writhing! 10 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:26,400 Leave me alone! It's my body! 11 00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:28,280 I should be able to grow my hair how I like! 12 00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:30,640 Stop being so selfish, for fuck's sake! 13 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:33,280 It's your nan's funeral. 14 00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:43,520 I am genuinely worried it's a bit too harsh, do you know what I mean? 15 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:46,160 I just want to let him have it, though. Tell him how I feel. 16 00:00:46,160 --> 00:00:47,800 Which is? 17 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:50,640 Not good. 18 00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:51,760 Did you write that down? 19 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:55,440 Hi, Dad, hope you're well. 20 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:56,720 Actually, no, I don't. 21 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:58,000 It's Josie. Remember me? 22 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,400 It might help to remind him if you say you're the ugly one. 23 00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:02,920 Excited to see Dad, then? 24 00:01:02,920 --> 00:01:05,960 You know that dream that you get when your parents walk in on you having sex? 25 00:01:05,960 --> 00:01:07,160 Yeah? 26 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,320 I look forward to having that so I can see Dad again. 27 00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,360 Sometimes I invite him to stay and watch. 28 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:13,800 I know. This is the happiest day of your life. 29 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:17,000 Not entirely. Nicky's leaving to open his ice bar in Manchester today. 30 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,400 What? Billie Bar? Yeah. 31 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:20,520 He asked me to go with him, can you believe it? 32 00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:22,880 It would be completely ridiculous to go, right? 33 00:01:22,880 --> 00:01:24,600 Unless you think I should do it? 34 00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,760 No, I don't think you should do it. 35 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:28,920 Yeah, I was never going to go. 36 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:30,520 I've seen the truth. 37 00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:32,280 Nan dying has taught me a big lesson. 38 00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:34,840 Life is futile and we should probably just get it over with? No. 39 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:36,880 Men always come crawling back. 40 00:01:36,880 --> 00:01:38,200 Do they? 41 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:39,400 Yeah, well, just look at Dad. 42 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:42,200 Ten years ago, he fucked off for teabags and, lo and behold, 43 00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:43,440 now we're going to see him. 44 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:44,800 Hmm. 45 00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,920 So I just need to let Nicky go, realise the grass isn't greener, 46 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:49,880 and then he's going to come crawling back, 47 00:01:49,880 --> 00:01:51,520 just like Dad. 48 00:02:05,120 --> 00:02:06,880 Why aren't you wearing your ring? 49 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:09,320 The patriarchy? 50 00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:12,520 No, no way, I'm not... I'm not falling for that again. 51 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:15,320 It's not the patriarchy, it's just a ring that you have to wear 52 00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:17,320 that says you're mine forever and ever. 53 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:22,040 I think it's best if I come today. 54 00:02:22,040 --> 00:02:24,640 Give you some support as your fiance and... 55 00:02:24,640 --> 00:02:26,840 And you know about my abandonment issues. 56 00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:30,000 It's just it's family only. 57 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,560 I am family. 58 00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:37,240 Wow, did you shave your legs? 59 00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:41,520 My nan is dead, Seb! 60 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,480 God! 61 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,480 DOOR SLAMS 62 00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:46,720 CAR HORN TOOTS 63 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:52,680 Oh, Billie, you look so feminine. 64 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:58,120 I really wish you'd have more respect for the dead, Josie. 65 00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:14,840 You know, I can't believe your car's still at the MOT, Deb. 66 00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:16,680 Still the problem with the wheels? 67 00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:18,320 Er...yes. Yeah. 68 00:03:18,320 --> 00:03:19,800 What is the issue? 69 00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:23,800 Um... Uh... 70 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,160 They've exploded. Ah. 71 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:32,400 Bye, darling! Josie loves you! 72 00:03:43,040 --> 00:03:44,440 Perhaps I could just pop in? 73 00:03:44,440 --> 00:03:46,000 You just wouldn't like it. 74 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:47,720 It's a closed funeral, very intimate. 75 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:49,520 Blood relatives only. 76 00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:51,000 Right. 77 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,920 She's your mother-in-law. Yeah. 78 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:55,000 I just think it's best if you weren't there, OK? 79 00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:59,160 It's been hard for the girls, what with all they've gone through. 80 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:00,880 Death is difficult for us. 81 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,360 I thought you of all people would understand that. 82 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:06,080 I'm sorry, how selfish of me. 83 00:04:06,080 --> 00:04:08,760 You're just looking out for the girls. 84 00:04:08,760 --> 00:04:10,000 I did wonder, actually, 85 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:13,800 if you all fancied joining me for lunch at my house later? 86 00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:15,440 A little wake, of sorts. 87 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,920 It really helped after Lisa's funeral. We'd love to. 88 00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:21,360 Right. Well, I'll just be in the pub round the corner, then. 89 00:04:21,360 --> 00:04:24,240 Oh, and, Deb, will you let me know when this is finished? 90 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:26,480 There's something else I'd like to do today. 91 00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:28,080 WHISPERS: Just us. 92 00:04:28,080 --> 00:04:30,240 Sounds delightful. 93 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:32,120 If that's OK with the girls. 94 00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:35,600 You're such a good mother, Deb. 95 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:37,440 I am a good mother. 96 00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:43,520 Why can't he come to the funeral? 97 00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:45,160 You know exactly why. 98 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:48,240 Because Dev and I have a connection over both of us being bereaved, 99 00:04:48,240 --> 00:04:52,360 and it would be nice if you didn't try to ruin that by pointing out the fact that it's built on lies. 100 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:54,480 Your dad is dead and that is the last I will hear of it. 101 00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:55,680 But he's not. 102 00:04:55,680 --> 00:04:57,600 He's alive, he's in there. 103 00:05:02,400 --> 00:05:03,840 I can't see him yet. 104 00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:07,120 Wow. So she's definitely dead, then? 105 00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:09,000 Were you suspicious? 106 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:10,120 I don't know. 107 00:05:10,120 --> 00:05:13,160 I thought Dad might have set this whole thing up so he could see me again. 108 00:05:13,160 --> 00:05:15,760 You think he staged Nan's death to get to see you? 109 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:17,720 People do strange things for love. 110 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:20,920 Do you not think if he really wanted to see you, he'd have texted? 111 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:25,000 Right, let's get in there and show him how well we are doing. 112 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:28,720 If anybody asks, I am an incredible mother and successful businesswoman 113 00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:30,320 with absolutely no debt. 114 00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:32,120 Josie is happy and engaged, 115 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:34,680 to a man with absolutely no mental health issues, 116 00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:35,800 and Billie... 117 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:38,400 Billie's a virgin. 118 00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:40,680 Nice. I'll lead with the Josie thing. 119 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:41,960 Bride to be. 120 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:43,760 Right, showtime! 121 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:47,520 SOMBRE ORGAN MUSIC PLAYS 122 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:55,760 Do you think there's space for me in there too? 123 00:05:56,880 --> 00:06:00,080 If you're going to kill yourself, at least have the decency to do it tomorrow. 124 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:03,320 It's hard to appear to be thriving while you're threatening suicide. 125 00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:06,640 So, is Nan in Heaven? I don't know. 126 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,000 Are we going to Heaven? 127 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:10,480 Probably not, no point, we won't know anyone. 128 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,000 Where the fuck is he? 129 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:16,520 Well, I think that's everyone. 130 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:19,880 Thank you for gathering here to remember... 131 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:21,320 DEEP VOICE: Where's Spencer? 132 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:25,640 Er, unfortunately, he couldn't be here today. 133 00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:27,080 What? What? 134 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:31,080 Did...did...? Did you want to say a few words? 135 00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:33,280 Oh. 136 00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:34,720 Er... 137 00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:38,760 ..nah. 138 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:42,160 Forgot my vintage Cartier bangle. 139 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:43,520 Oh! 140 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:45,240 SHE GIGGLES 141 00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:48,640 Yes, Mr Sugar, I will make that 4pm meeting. 142 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:53,120 What a prick. Who doesn't come to their own mother's funeral? 143 00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:55,120 I know, we shaved my legs for nothing. 144 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:56,520 Do you think Mum's OK? 145 00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:58,080 She'll deal with it in her own way. 146 00:06:58,080 --> 00:06:59,480 Complete denial. 147 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:03,440 Where are you going? I was wrong. 148 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:05,120 Men don't come crawling back. 149 00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:06,760 We have to crawl to them. 150 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,040 What? 151 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:09,720 I'm going to find Nicky. 152 00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:12,960 Ooh, lunch for the girls at Dev's house! 153 00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:14,600 We'll be living there next. 154 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,160 I wonder what else he's got in mind for me today? 155 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:20,000 Maybe he'll propose! 156 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,960 This is where Lisa was laid to rest. 157 00:07:26,080 --> 00:07:27,640 HE CLEARS HIS THROAT 158 00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:30,440 I know you have trouble getting over the death of your husband. 159 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:31,760 I struggle too, 160 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:33,960 but by bringing you here, 161 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:37,760 I know that Lisa is at peace with me moving on. 162 00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:45,200 Lisa, I want you to meet Deb. 163 00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:49,160 She's wonderful, just like you. 164 00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:54,120 It's all right. 165 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:55,680 I feel emotional too. 166 00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:58,800 She's younger than me. 167 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:10,200 Missed you. 168 00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:11,240 How did your speech go? 169 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:12,640 He wasn't even there. 170 00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:15,080 I don't know why I'm surprised. All men let us down. 171 00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:17,520 Well, I'm still here. 172 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:20,200 Why...why don't you say it to me? Pretend I'm him. 173 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,520 Tell me how you feel. Oh, I don't know. 174 00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:24,800 I don't know how I'd say it, it feels stupid. 175 00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:27,120 It's not stupid. He wasn't nice to you. 176 00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:29,320 He wasn't, was he? No. 177 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:32,360 You've had one of the worst childhoods I've ever heard about. 178 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,360 Really? Yeah. 179 00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:37,960 It was really traumatic for you. 180 00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:39,600 It was, wasn't it? 181 00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:40,880 Yeah. 182 00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:43,720 Does that make me... 183 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,240 ..special? 184 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:48,520 Yeah. 185 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:50,760 Very special. 186 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:10,680 DOOR BELL RINGS 187 00:09:10,680 --> 00:09:13,400 Look at this massive house. 188 00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:14,880 Dev's a fresh start. 189 00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:18,600 He represents the new, none of that old baggage from the past. 190 00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:20,160 That's why I love him. 191 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,840 Where did he take you today? 192 00:09:21,840 --> 00:09:23,480 His dead wife's grave. 193 00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:27,360 Heated floors. 194 00:09:27,360 --> 00:09:28,720 Wow. 195 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:30,640 I kept some of Lisa's things, 196 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:32,360 I didn't know what to do with them. 197 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:35,520 Mm. I'd feel the same way about Josie. 198 00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:37,600 Except I won't have to cos... 199 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:39,080 ..when she dies, 200 00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:41,000 I'll make sure I kill myself. 201 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,640 Hmm. 202 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:44,720 I'm going to check on my tagine. 203 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:46,320 Come along, Seb. 204 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:49,280 Look at all these fancy products. 205 00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:53,080 I always think they'd be so delicious, but I know you're not supposed to eat them. 206 00:09:55,560 --> 00:09:57,120 Wow! 207 00:09:59,960 --> 00:10:02,160 The things I'd do to you. 208 00:10:25,040 --> 00:10:26,960 You look different, Seb. 209 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:28,320 I've done it. 210 00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:29,680 What? 211 00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:32,560 It. I've done it, me and Josie. 212 00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:36,000 And you know what? 213 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:38,840 I think we're going to do it again. 214 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:42,000 Oh, that's fantastic news! 215 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:43,960 Do you see what I mean? 216 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,720 We show these women no fear. 217 00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:47,080 PLATES RATTLE 218 00:10:48,760 --> 00:10:51,120 Are you all right? I just, er, feel a bit nervous 219 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:52,800 about having the girls round. 220 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:58,160 But Deb's just been so good at helping me move on. 221 00:10:58,160 --> 00:11:00,200 Ooh, look at me, I'm Lisa. 222 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,120 I wear North Face jackets and I go outside! 223 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:06,640 Ooh, I'm Lisa and I'm dead! 224 00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,360 Good one, Mum. 225 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,720 What a treat this all is! 226 00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:16,080 It is an honour to be here. 227 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:18,720 And can I just say, this coo-coo is delicious. 228 00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:21,440 Orange juice is a bit strong. 229 00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:23,800 It's so wonderful having you all here. 230 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:26,080 This house can get so lonely sometimes. 231 00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:30,840 There's something I want to ask you, Deb. 232 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:34,640 But I really want Billie to be here. 233 00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:37,720 Is she going to be here soon? She's on her way. Hmm. 234 00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:41,040 How was she after the funeral? 235 00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:43,560 I know she had a tough time after her father. 236 00:11:43,560 --> 00:11:45,040 She's fine. 237 00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:46,800 I'm so proud of her. 238 00:11:46,800 --> 00:11:50,560 She's done such a good job of moving on after Nicky. 239 00:11:50,560 --> 00:11:52,680 Look at us girls. 240 00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:54,840 Such strong, independent women. 241 00:11:54,840 --> 00:11:58,280 You are strong, independent women, 242 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:00,120 and this one's mine. 243 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,200 Forever and ever. 244 00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:04,280 Till death do us part. 245 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,480 I'm sorry you had to see this. 246 00:12:13,440 --> 00:12:14,920 I swear to God, Josie. 247 00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:16,640 Don't fuck this up for me. 248 00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:18,040 Where the fuck is your sister? 249 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:19,960 Probably halfway to Manchester now. 250 00:12:19,960 --> 00:12:21,880 You what? She wants to be with Nicky. 251 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:24,240 She wants to hand out topless shots at Billie Bar. 252 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:27,360 She's a romantic. Nicky couldn't give a shit whether she lives or dies. 253 00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:29,760 People do strange things for love. Yeah, not me. 254 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:34,080 You told the man downstairs that Dad died choking on a chicken goujon. 255 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,320 That's different. Dev's coming through for me. 256 00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:38,600 He's like a 2p machine on Brighton Pier. 257 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:41,760 If I keep putting in coins, he's going to pay out, I know it. 258 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,120 Really? 259 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:45,960 Cos I don't think he's paid for a single thing, not once. 260 00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:47,840 Josie, look where we are. 261 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:49,800 We are in the massive house. 262 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:51,400 We are so close now. 263 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,200 He's about to ask us to move in. 264 00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:55,080 He's got heated floors. 265 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:58,040 But what about Billie? What about her? She can make her own choices. 266 00:12:58,040 --> 00:12:59,720 She's not my responsibility. 267 00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:18,600 Is she all right up there? Absolutely. 268 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:20,240 Just a runny tummy. 269 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:22,240 You're such a good mother, Deb. 270 00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:23,920 That's what I love about you, 271 00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:27,160 always there for your girls, whenever they need you. 272 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:28,840 A mother, 273 00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:31,600 alongside them every step of the journey. 274 00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,360 Road trip! 275 00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,400 Quite thrilling, isn't it! 276 00:13:40,400 --> 00:13:43,400 You know, the last time I was in Manchester it was with Lis... 277 00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:46,880 Never mind. 278 00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:48,640 It's all very exciting. 279 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,360 My James Bond. 280 00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:02,000 TROLLEY BAG WHEELS RUMBLE 281 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:25,240 Billie Bar? 282 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:27,360 Bianca Bar. 283 00:14:32,920 --> 00:14:34,520 Sorry. 284 00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,760 You know I get nose bleeds when I get carsick. 285 00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:38,040 I'm dangerously anaemic. 286 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:40,440 A single journey like this could end me. 287 00:14:40,440 --> 00:14:43,120 But, you know, anything for my future wife. 288 00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:46,840 PHONE RINGS 289 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:49,400 Hello? She's answered! Billie, we know you're in Manchester. 290 00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:52,160 We're coming to stop you making the biggest mistake of your life. 291 00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:54,000 Yeah, and it was my idea. 292 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,600 What? 293 00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:57,600 Oh, no, I didn't leave. 294 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:00,200 Right, I've got to go. I'll talk to you later, I'm a bit busy. 295 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:06,880 Of course she didn't really go. 296 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:08,200 This is your fault, Josie. 297 00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:12,200 What a waste of poor Dev's lovely lunch. 298 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:16,720 What was that question you were going to ask me, Dev? 299 00:15:16,720 --> 00:15:18,480 Is now a good moment? 300 00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:21,920 Oh. Er, OK. 301 00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:23,200 Well, 302 00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:28,160 erm, it would mean an awful lot to me if, um, you 303 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:29,880 and...and the girls, 304 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:31,280 would consider... 305 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,120 It's OK, you can say it. 306 00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:41,080 Well, Deb, will you... 307 00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:44,200 ..take me to Spencer's grave? 308 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:49,160 Yes, 309 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:50,480 of course. 310 00:15:51,440 --> 00:15:53,600 I will take you to his grave. 311 00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:55,440 I'd love that. 312 00:15:55,440 --> 00:15:58,200 Ah, OK, well, um, 313 00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:00,080 I'll go and fill her up, then. 314 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:03,320 I'll get my card. No, no, no, don't worry. 315 00:16:03,320 --> 00:16:04,800 I'll get this. 316 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:16,120 We're the same, you and me. 317 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:17,960 Both natural blondes. 318 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:21,560 Fuck this! Let's go and tell that prick exactly how we feel about him. 319 00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:22,960 Perfect Pussy Club. 320 00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:24,640 Perfect Pussy Club. 321 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:29,480 And he's going in. 322 00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:32,320 And he's walking to the till. 323 00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:36,480 He's getting his wallet out, 324 00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:39,800 he's removing his card. 325 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,640 And...he's paid! 326 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:44,520 CAR ALARM SOUNDS 327 00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:51,920 I know it feels small, but that man in there is paying for petrol 328 00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:55,920 and at this point, he might as well be cutting me a fucking key! 329 00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:00,400 Congratulations. 330 00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:03,680 Please don't make me marry Seb. 331 00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:06,120 I'm not making you do anything. 332 00:17:06,120 --> 00:17:08,840 All I've ever wanted is for you to be happy. 333 00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:11,320 But the kind of happiness you want doesn't exist, 334 00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:15,280 so why don't you do the right thing and love with less of your heart? 335 00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:16,840 Trust me. 336 00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:19,720 When you're married, you'll be the happiest you've ever felt. 337 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:22,160 Really? Yes, absolutely. 338 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:25,480 Is that how you felt about Dad, then? 339 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:34,680 Where the fuck am I going to find a grave with your father's fucking name on? 340 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:43,680 There he is. 341 00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:45,520 The love of your life. 342 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:46,680 We need to go. 343 00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:48,400 Right now. 344 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,080 But Seb's not back in the car yet! 345 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:52,000 Do you really want me to be happy, Mum? 346 00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,560 Of course. 347 00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:55,200 Then drive. 348 00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:00,320 All right, Dev, let's go. 349 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:05,800 Josie?! 350 00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:08,280 For God's sake, Seb, she's gay! 351 00:18:08,280 --> 00:18:10,360 Wait. JOSIE: I am? 352 00:18:10,360 --> 00:18:12,120 Yes. You're gay. 353 00:18:12,120 --> 00:18:14,440 I mean, I prefer queer as it encompasses my gender... 354 00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:15,880 Don't push it! You're gay. 355 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:23,040 For now. 356 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:32,520 Threesome? 357 00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:34,400 No, Nicky. 358 00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,880 Actually, we're here to tell you some home truths. 359 00:18:36,880 --> 00:18:38,680 We're sick of being treated like this. 360 00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:40,240 Yeah, you've led us both on. 361 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:42,000 We're done. You lied. 362 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:43,840 You cheated. You're a narcissist. 363 00:18:43,840 --> 00:18:45,320 You treated us the exact same. 364 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:48,600 And do you know what? You can have this necklace back. 365 00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:50,680 What? And these. 366 00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:52,240 Don't want them. 367 00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:54,600 You can have them back too. I'll have them. 368 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:57,160 And I've deleted all the photos from Italy. 369 00:18:57,160 --> 00:18:58,520 We're leaving you. 370 00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,040 Fuck you, Nicky. 371 00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:01,600 Yeah. 372 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,400 Fuck you, Italy. 373 00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:39,400 I can't believe Dad didn't come. 374 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:40,640 I know. 375 00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:42,640 I really expected more from a man who said 376 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:45,880 he was popping out for teabags ten years ago and never came back. 377 00:19:45,880 --> 00:19:47,960 I knew it, really... 378 00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:49,480 ..about Nicky. 379 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:50,800 Yeah. 380 00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:53,280 Do other women do what we do for love? 381 00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:56,240 Yep. And if they say they don't, they're lying. 382 00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:58,840 He never loved me really, did he? 383 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:02,360 Sorry, do you mean Nicky or Dad? 384 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:05,240 I'm not sure. 385 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,800 THEY LAUGH 386 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:35,200 I thought you said his name was Spencer. 387 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:37,360 Yeah, but everyone called him Clarence. 388 00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:38,760 Fun little nickname. 389 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:40,720 An old soul. 390 00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:43,080 He was 87 when he passed away. 391 00:20:43,080 --> 00:20:45,560 Yeah. Young at heart. Young at heart, though. 392 00:20:45,560 --> 00:20:47,720 Love knows no age, Dev. 393 00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:52,240 Well, er, Clarence-Spencer-Dad, 394 00:20:52,240 --> 00:20:55,720 thank you for the many, many memories that we have. 395 00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:00,200 I hope I have your blessing to move on to this incredible man. 396 00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:02,080 He goes above and beyond. 397 00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:03,920 He paid for petrol, he... 398 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,800 He's just lovely. 399 00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:14,440 Oh! Oh, I think he's, er... I think he's speaking to me. 400 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:16,760 Yes, it's almost like he's saying... 401 00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:21,400 "You have my blessing." How sweet! 402 00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:25,680 Would either of you like to say a few words? 403 00:21:25,680 --> 00:21:27,240 Actually, yeah, I... 404 00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:29,400 I fucking do. He's fucking dead. 405 00:21:29,400 --> 00:21:31,440 Yes, isn't he, Billie? Good girl. 406 00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,760 You were a right fucking prick and I'm glad you're dead, 407 00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:35,240 you fucking freak. 408 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:37,920 Wherever you are, I hope you never fucking come back! 409 00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:40,640 Sorry. 410 00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:42,840 We all grieve in different ways. 411 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:44,880 You're such a good mother, Deb. 412 00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:48,720 Right, well, now I've got Clarence's blessing, 413 00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:50,360 shall we head back to yours, Dev? 414 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,120 I think I might need a little bit more time. 415 00:21:56,760 --> 00:21:59,200 And, speaking of which, I just wanted to let you know, 416 00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:02,800 there's absolutely no rush on anything but, erm... 417 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,320 ..when you're ready, 418 00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:08,120 perhaps you would just transfer me that £30 for petrol. 419 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:15,080 Go on, what do you want to say to him, then? 420 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:17,120 You're the artist, I bet it's really good. 421 00:22:27,920 --> 00:22:29,760 Couldn't have put it better myself. 422 00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:44,160 Bye. 423 00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:45,720 I hope it was worth it. 424 00:22:52,360 --> 00:22:54,440 TV PLAYS 425 00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:58,200 I forgot to ask, how was the funeral? 426 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,240 It was a lovely ceremony. 427 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:01,800 Was it? 428 00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,480 STERNLY: It was a lovely ceremony. 429 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:06,800 Vino? 430 00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:11,280 How was the pub? 431 00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:12,600 Oh, it was OK. 432 00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:15,120 I met a really interesting man in there. 433 00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:17,920 He was too scared to go into the church. 434 00:23:17,920 --> 00:23:19,160 Imagine that? 435 00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:21,640 Going to a funeral, getting all the way to the doors, 436 00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:23,240 and being afraid to go inside?! 437 00:23:25,120 --> 00:23:26,600 Did he say why? 438 00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:29,200 Yeah. He was scared of seeing his kids. 439 00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:31,000 LAUGHS BREATHILY 440 00:23:32,360 --> 00:23:34,680 People are odd, aren't they? 441 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:38,520 I'm going to see if your mum needs a hand in the kitchen. 442 00:23:42,120 --> 00:23:44,080 He was scared of us. 443 00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:45,120 Yeah. 444 00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:48,280 Are we scary? 445 00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,360 I think we might be a bit, yeah. 446 00:23:50,360 --> 00:23:52,360 Good. 447 00:23:52,360 --> 00:23:54,400 BANG ON WINDOW, SHE GASPS 448 00:23:57,680 --> 00:23:58,880 Oh, yeah.