1 00:00:13,556 --> 00:00:14,891 Hold all my-- Whoa! 2 00:00:14,891 --> 00:00:16,058 {\an8}[laughing] 3 00:00:17,059 --> 00:00:18,394 ♪ Boss Baby ♪ 4 00:00:18,394 --> 00:00:20,438 ♪ I'm the boss Dial in to the meeting ♪ 5 00:00:20,438 --> 00:00:22,607 ♪ Everybody here Please, find your seating ♪ 6 00:00:22,607 --> 00:00:24,984 ♪ While you're teething I'm sinking my teeth in ♪ 7 00:00:24,984 --> 00:00:27,361 ♪ First one to show So I can do all my greeting ♪ 8 00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,655 ♪ Profits, payrolls, and pacifiers ♪ 9 00:00:29,655 --> 00:00:31,866 ♪ I make friends I love you, you're hired ♪ 10 00:00:31,866 --> 00:00:34,368 ♪ So come on and raise Your juice boxes skyward ♪ 11 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,162 ♪ Boss babies until we retire ♪ 12 00:00:36,162 --> 00:00:38,456 - ♪ Boss Baby ♪ - ♪ Tell them who this is ♪ 13 00:00:38,456 --> 00:00:40,875 - ♪ Boss Baby ♪ - ♪ I'm a legend, mythic ♪ 14 00:00:40,875 --> 00:00:43,377 - ♪ Boss Baby ♪ - ♪ Can a baby get a witness? ♪ 15 00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:46,005 ♪ Grab a high chair This the family business ♪ 16 00:00:46,005 --> 00:00:47,006 ♪ Boss Baby ♪ 17 00:00:48,925 --> 00:00:51,427 [Pull-String CEO] I used to believe in a world of love. 18 00:00:52,011 --> 00:00:54,055 [shrieks, then grumbles] 19 00:00:54,055 --> 00:00:56,098 That was my first mistake. 20 00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:57,058 {\an8}[whirring] 21 00:00:57,058 --> 00:00:59,143 {\an8}[Pam] Oh, come on, baby! 22 00:00:59,977 --> 00:01:02,647 [Pull-String CEO] Some say "love is a rare spice" 23 00:01:02,647 --> 00:01:06,067 and that's why Grandma's marinara tastes so good. 24 00:01:06,067 --> 00:01:09,779 But last I heard, Granny's punching license plates 25 00:01:09,779 --> 00:01:11,239 in a Miami prison. 26 00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:12,740 [shrieking] 27 00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:14,867 [amplified shrieking over speakers] 28 00:01:14,867 --> 00:01:16,744 And me, well... 29 00:01:16,744 --> 00:01:19,080 I never liked Italian food. 30 00:01:19,080 --> 00:01:21,999 {\an8}Lovely to chat with you as well, Mr. Pull-String. 31 00:01:21,999 --> 00:01:25,128 {\an8}I assume you've brought something for the bank? 32 00:01:25,128 --> 00:01:27,255 Hello, you know it. 33 00:01:27,255 --> 00:01:29,966 Peep these Baby Hate numbers... 34 00:01:29,966 --> 00:01:33,469 Mr. Tigglesnooks, please check today's exchange rate 35 00:01:33,469 --> 00:01:36,889 for Baby Hate and transfer the appropriate earnings 36 00:01:36,889 --> 00:01:38,474 to Baby Corp's account. 37 00:01:38,474 --> 00:01:40,893 [Mr. Tigglesnooks meowing angrily] 38 00:01:40,893 --> 00:01:43,479 Is there a problem with the numbers? 39 00:01:43,479 --> 00:01:47,900 I assure you, we made a lot of people really hate babies. 40 00:01:47,900 --> 00:01:52,238 No, they're still cross with me for making Baby Love worthless 41 00:01:52,238 --> 00:01:54,866 and paying for Baby Hate instead. 42 00:01:55,449 --> 00:01:59,704 They think it's a risky investment, and kittens hate risk. 43 00:01:59,704 --> 00:02:02,957 Other than climbing tall trees, frolicking on narrow ledges, 44 00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:06,544 and aggravating larger dogs, so shall we stop moaning 45 00:02:06,544 --> 00:02:11,174 and play by my rules in my stolen bank, Mr. Tigglesnooks? 46 00:02:11,799 --> 00:02:12,758 [cash register dings] 47 00:02:12,758 --> 00:02:15,178 Ah! So generous. 48 00:02:15,178 --> 00:02:17,680 We thank you and our CEO thanks you. 49 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:20,433 [Pull-String CEO] Hammerface's laid siege to a church! 50 00:02:20,433 --> 00:02:21,350 Get in! 51 00:02:21,350 --> 00:02:22,894 You've earned it. 52 00:02:22,894 --> 00:02:26,689 Throwing your former clients under the tricycle tires? 53 00:02:26,689 --> 00:02:30,318 The game has changed, and we always back the winners. 54 00:02:30,318 --> 00:02:33,279 You can't run a business working for free. 55 00:02:33,279 --> 00:02:34,197 [crying] 56 00:02:34,197 --> 00:02:36,365 No-account baby getting coffee all over me. 57 00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:38,201 Ugh. That is never coming out. 58 00:02:38,201 --> 00:02:40,161 How am I supposed to-- What? 59 00:02:40,161 --> 00:02:43,581 A clean sweater to cover my coffee-stained uniform? 60 00:02:43,581 --> 00:02:47,084 It's not regulation, but... Aw, I forgive you. 61 00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:50,087 Boring Baby's feeling that Baby Love again! 62 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:52,089 Unbelievable! 63 00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:55,760 My prizewinning beauties, all ruined by a baby! 64 00:02:57,720 --> 00:02:58,596 [honks] 65 00:02:59,138 --> 00:03:00,473 Or was it a goose? 66 00:03:00,473 --> 00:03:03,309 Well, whatever you are, I'm chasing you! 67 00:03:03,309 --> 00:03:06,103 Baby Hate successfully shifted to goose. 68 00:03:06,103 --> 00:03:07,647 - How's your mission? - [shrieking] 69 00:03:07,647 --> 00:03:09,607 - Why's the baby gotta be loud? - Stop! 70 00:03:09,607 --> 00:03:11,609 [Dez] I am deep undercover. 71 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:16,072 5Searching the incident site for the source of-- Ah-ha. 72 00:03:16,072 --> 00:03:18,324 [amplified shrieking continues] 73 00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:23,120 - [amplified shrieking stops] - Oh... 74 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,456 When she shrieks at a lower volume 75 00:03:25,456 --> 00:03:27,708 that baby's pretty sweet! Right? 76 00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:30,503 Thanks for lending me the high-altitude surveillance. 77 00:03:30,503 --> 00:03:32,338 Been a pleasure being you. 78 00:03:33,005 --> 00:03:36,008 [Boss Baby] Another day, another zero dollars. 79 00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:38,010 [Tina] All for the love of Baby Love. 80 00:03:38,010 --> 00:03:39,303 [babies crying] 81 00:03:39,303 --> 00:03:43,140 How can I--? You know, I'll let you finish your meltdown. 82 00:03:43,140 --> 00:03:45,309 Baby Corp defaced your project? 83 00:03:45,309 --> 00:03:49,105 Are you sure your mom doesn't look like a hairy octopus? 84 00:03:49,105 --> 00:03:53,109 Hear me out. What if we blamed one armed robbery on you? 85 00:03:53,109 --> 00:03:56,988 Nope! What's our one firm rule here at Mayonnaise City? 86 00:03:56,988 --> 00:03:59,073 Ugh. No Baby Hate. 87 00:03:59,073 --> 00:04:02,034 - Sorry, the logo's confusing! - You designed it! 88 00:04:02,034 --> 00:04:05,079 We're the only place fighting to bring these guys love. 89 00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:07,790 We can't stop, no matter what it costs us. 90 00:04:07,790 --> 00:04:08,916 [Simmons sobbing] 91 00:04:08,916 --> 00:04:11,085 Simmons? You okay? 92 00:04:11,085 --> 00:04:13,045 I'm fine, I just-- 93 00:04:13,045 --> 00:04:15,298 I know how short we are on cash. 94 00:04:15,298 --> 00:04:19,427 You're selling your bobblehead to a collector to help us? 95 00:04:19,427 --> 00:04:20,428 Oh, Simmons. 96 00:04:20,428 --> 00:04:22,471 I wish it was a collector. 97 00:04:22,471 --> 00:04:26,100 This guy Giancarlo Crunch makes videos of beloved toys 98 00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:28,894 being crushed by monster trucks. 99 00:04:28,894 --> 00:04:30,938 [gasps] Don't you dare! 100 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:34,066 No matter what it costs us. 101 00:04:34,066 --> 00:04:34,984 Right? 102 00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:37,528 [babies crying] 103 00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:41,157 FYI, there's another 50 babies in line outside. 104 00:04:41,907 --> 00:04:44,869 Looks like we're missing family dinner again. 105 00:04:45,453 --> 00:04:47,371 Nobody misses family dinner. 106 00:04:48,873 --> 00:04:50,333 - Ouch! - [crying] 107 00:04:50,333 --> 00:04:52,418 Sorry, he pulled my leg hair. 108 00:04:52,418 --> 00:04:55,921 Why would Biscuits pay out on hate instead of love? 109 00:04:55,921 --> 00:04:57,465 Love has a holiday! 110 00:04:57,465 --> 00:04:59,300 What does hate have, when rent's due? 111 00:04:59,300 --> 00:05:02,678 He doesn't care about money. He wants to run us out of business. 112 00:05:02,678 --> 00:05:04,597 No matter how many babies get hurt. 113 00:05:04,597 --> 00:05:05,598 What a jerk! 114 00:05:05,598 --> 00:05:08,642 Taking our house and brainwashing our pony was one thing-- 115 00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:11,270 - Two things! - You really wanna sass me? 116 00:05:11,270 --> 00:05:14,940 Wait till I'm the one teaching you how to count to ten on your toes. 117 00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:16,359 [Carol] Teach her to count? 118 00:05:16,359 --> 00:05:18,277 Tina reads graphs better than I do. 119 00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:19,528 What's going on? 120 00:05:20,446 --> 00:05:23,240 - Um, bosses, there's a-- - JJ! 121 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,659 - I'll help with whatever-- - Mommy Time Coupon! 122 00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:27,119 You're using it now? 123 00:05:27,119 --> 00:05:30,039 Don't give me a one-time Mommy Time Coupon 124 00:05:30,039 --> 00:05:32,917 if you don't expect me to use it. They'll be a minute. 125 00:05:34,502 --> 00:05:35,378 Talk. 126 00:05:35,795 --> 00:05:38,547 I wasn't gonna bring this up until I decided for sure, 127 00:05:38,547 --> 00:05:41,258 but once we get things back to normal, 128 00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,010 I'm thinking about retiring. 129 00:05:43,010 --> 00:05:44,804 - Whoa. - Retiring? 130 00:05:44,804 --> 00:05:46,722 - Like--? - Like a regular... 131 00:05:46,722 --> 00:05:48,390 [coos] 132 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:53,104 So, no more dangerous missions, or skipping dinner to work overtime? 133 00:05:54,063 --> 00:05:56,273 That's a big decision, Teen-bean. 134 00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:59,527 When Teddy retired it was way harder than I thought it'd be. 135 00:05:59,527 --> 00:06:00,986 - Really? - Yeah! 136 00:06:00,986 --> 00:06:03,405 I wasn't used to you being a goo-brained blob. 137 00:06:03,405 --> 00:06:05,157 I kept leaving you with outlets, 138 00:06:05,157 --> 00:06:07,451 forgetting you didn't know not to poke them. 139 00:06:07,451 --> 00:06:10,329 Is that why I don't have fingerprints? 140 00:06:10,329 --> 00:06:12,373 That's not going to happen to you. 141 00:06:12,373 --> 00:06:16,085 If you retire, your days will be filled with stories and snuggles, 142 00:06:16,085 --> 00:06:18,921 and your nights will be lullabied to a peaceful sleep, 143 00:06:18,921 --> 00:06:21,340 knowing Mommy loves you so much. 144 00:06:21,340 --> 00:06:23,092 I could get used to that. 145 00:06:23,092 --> 00:06:24,885 [baby crying] 146 00:06:27,304 --> 00:06:28,681 Everything's peachy. 147 00:06:28,681 --> 00:06:31,267 Go back to your dinner. [laughs] 148 00:06:31,892 --> 00:06:34,854 How sure are you about this retirement thing? 149 00:06:37,022 --> 00:06:38,649 Very high 90s. 150 00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:41,443 I think it may be time to give Crispin what he wants. 151 00:06:41,443 --> 00:06:43,362 What? Give up the business? 152 00:06:43,362 --> 00:06:46,031 This keeps up, we're out of business anyway. 153 00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:49,493 We make a deal, maybe Biscuits sets the bank right. 154 00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:52,663 We lose our company, but we save Baby Love. 155 00:06:52,663 --> 00:06:55,332 - Hmm. No. - What? 156 00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:57,418 You win, we quit, business ruined! 157 00:06:57,418 --> 00:07:00,671 A hornet's nest could have ruined your business. 158 00:07:00,671 --> 00:07:03,174 I was hired to ruin the two of you. 159 00:07:03,174 --> 00:07:05,926 Professionally, personally, utterly. 160 00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:10,681 What nonsense performance metric is that? How would you know when the job's done? 161 00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:13,142 I can tell you when the job's done. 162 00:07:13,142 --> 00:07:16,395 When I watch the last tiny spark of hope flicker 163 00:07:16,395 --> 00:07:19,315 and drain away from your weeping eyeballs. 164 00:07:19,315 --> 00:07:21,233 Then our game is over. 165 00:07:21,233 --> 00:07:22,651 Till then, friends! 166 00:07:24,820 --> 00:07:26,655 What are you smiling about? 167 00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:28,532 Because we already won! 168 00:07:28,532 --> 00:07:31,118 Biscuits thinks he's gonna make us give up hope? 169 00:07:31,118 --> 00:07:34,872 Us? As long as this company's got four walls around it-- 170 00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:36,707 [heavy thudding] 171 00:07:36,707 --> 00:07:41,128 Why is there a guy taking wrecking ball swings at our office? 172 00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,087 What? 173 00:07:42,755 --> 00:07:46,634 He made a deal online with someone from Mayonnaise City! 174 00:07:47,259 --> 00:07:49,470 I wish I had an idea that good. 175 00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:52,014 It was me! I made the deal! 176 00:07:52,014 --> 00:07:54,099 - JJ! - [thudding continues] 177 00:07:54,850 --> 00:07:57,811 He's gonna knock the place down! Buy him off! 178 00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:58,729 With what? 179 00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:01,023 - You pay me in stock! - You're complaining? 180 00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:03,150 You own 98% of the company! 181 00:08:03,150 --> 00:08:04,902 Of a broke company! 182 00:08:04,902 --> 00:08:06,820 I own 98% of zero! 183 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,864 Am I buying him off with air? 184 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:11,700 Hope he likes mayonnaise. 185 00:08:12,868 --> 00:08:14,578 Why would you make that deal? 186 00:08:14,578 --> 00:08:16,580 We've sold everything! 187 00:08:16,580 --> 00:08:19,333 How are we supposed to stay in business? 188 00:08:19,333 --> 00:08:20,543 Okay, idea. 189 00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:21,460 Hear me out. 190 00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:24,547 We make people hate babies. 191 00:08:24,547 --> 00:08:25,506 No! 192 00:08:25,506 --> 00:08:27,258 Some babies. 193 00:08:27,258 --> 00:08:29,301 - No! - A few hand-selected-- 194 00:08:29,301 --> 00:08:30,761 No Baby Hate! 195 00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:32,429 One baby-- 196 00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:35,057 Would you dump the wrath of an entire town 197 00:08:35,057 --> 00:08:37,476 on the head of one toddling infant? 198 00:08:37,476 --> 00:08:40,312 - Depends on who the infant is. - What did you just say? 199 00:08:40,312 --> 00:08:44,275 Good news, wrecking ball guy agreed to take the mayonnaise. 200 00:08:44,275 --> 00:08:46,277 and one last practice swing. 201 00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:54,243 So help me, Bad Idea Baby is right. 202 00:08:54,243 --> 00:08:55,244 - [all gasp] - What? 203 00:08:55,244 --> 00:08:57,204 Why would you say it like that? 204 00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:59,331 We're not making people hate babies! 205 00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:02,293 No, we'll make them hate one baby. 206 00:09:02,293 --> 00:09:04,753 So much that it takes the heat off the others 207 00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:08,632 and earns us badly needed bank cash by the wagonload. 208 00:09:08,632 --> 00:09:11,010 So let's make them hate me. 209 00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:16,015 If anyone thinks these two should not be joined in wedlock by me-- 210 00:09:16,015 --> 00:09:19,143 Charla Lazlo, attorney-at-law, look for my ad on bus stops. 211 00:09:19,143 --> 00:09:22,771 - speak now or forever plead the fifth-- - [crying] 212 00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:23,731 I knew it! 213 00:09:23,731 --> 00:09:26,900 This was doomed from the start! [crying] 214 00:09:28,277 --> 00:09:29,236 Oh! 215 00:09:32,031 --> 00:09:35,284 Who does this tailored monstrosity belong to? 216 00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,829 That baby is banned for life! 217 00:09:38,829 --> 00:09:40,748 This suit is now half-off. 218 00:09:40,748 --> 00:09:44,084 - Now a moment of silence for Bill. - [spits] 219 00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:45,336 [all gasping] 220 00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:47,379 It was that baby! 221 00:09:49,423 --> 00:09:53,594 Maybe our love is like this Neapolitan ice cream sandwich. 222 00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:57,389 It'll have its nasty strawberry times and its boring vanilla times, 223 00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:59,016 but if we give it a chance, 224 00:09:59,016 --> 00:10:03,103 I believe there's sweet chocolate for both of us in the end. 225 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,813 - It's him again! - [farts] 226 00:10:06,106 --> 00:10:09,985 - He farted on our love. - I hate that baby! 227 00:10:11,904 --> 00:10:14,156 Ready another hate payout. 228 00:10:14,156 --> 00:10:16,700 Baby Corp's been so very busy. 229 00:10:16,700 --> 00:10:18,118 [Mr. Tigglesnooks meows] 230 00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:21,163 What do you mean it's not Baby Corp? Who is it? 231 00:10:21,163 --> 00:10:24,124 Krinkle on the Couch, the voice you trust, 232 00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:26,543 now on furniture you can relate to. 233 00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:28,128 We're sure about this? 234 00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:31,548 You wanna get Tina to cozy, cuddling regular baby retirement? 235 00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:34,176 You have no idea how much I want that. 236 00:10:34,176 --> 00:10:35,761 This is how you do your part. 237 00:10:35,761 --> 00:10:38,138 I'm joined by the Templetons, 238 00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:41,600 a family whose baby has been terrorizing the tow-- Ow! 239 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,228 {\an8}Teddy, no! No biting! 240 00:10:44,728 --> 00:10:47,064 {\an8}So, what's the skinny with your mini? 241 00:10:47,064 --> 00:10:49,441 Does he act this way because you're terrible? 242 00:10:49,441 --> 00:10:50,567 No, ma'am. 243 00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:52,069 Look at our other children! 244 00:10:52,069 --> 00:10:54,988 I know how to set the table for a formal dinner! 245 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:56,240 [all] Aw! 246 00:10:56,240 --> 00:11:00,452 We're just so powerless against our terrible Teddy! 247 00:11:00,452 --> 00:11:02,121 Our lives are in ruins! 248 00:11:02,121 --> 00:11:03,914 Our nerves are shattered! 249 00:11:03,914 --> 00:11:05,082 What do we do? 250 00:11:05,082 --> 00:11:06,875 Let's ask our audience! 251 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:08,919 You in the checkerboard tank top. 252 00:11:08,919 --> 00:11:10,462 It's an argyle sweater vest. 253 00:11:11,964 --> 00:11:16,051 I think if the baby had some training perhaps-- [yells] 254 00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:18,220 Please! I have a child store! 255 00:11:19,263 --> 00:11:23,559 [Pull-String CEO] When the chips are down, mercy's a card best played in the dark. 256 00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:28,105 So, what are we to do with this new prince of naughtiness? 257 00:11:28,105 --> 00:11:31,525 If Boss Baby wishes to suck up all the Baby Hate, 258 00:11:31,525 --> 00:11:35,154 we must tie a knot in his twisty slurp-straw. 259 00:11:35,737 --> 00:11:38,490 - No! Oh, bad Teddy! - Come back here! 260 00:11:42,828 --> 00:11:46,039 Teddy! How could... you? 261 00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:48,292 Actually, it was this bad baby. 262 00:11:48,292 --> 00:11:49,460 Your baby's there. 263 00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:52,921 It's the cutie from the magazine! 264 00:11:52,921 --> 00:11:54,673 - How sweet! - It is him! 265 00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:58,010 "Fuzzy Feelings Digest." Must be new. 266 00:11:58,010 --> 00:12:01,263 - Think they need writers? - What? I never posed with-- 267 00:12:01,263 --> 00:12:04,683 - Can I get a photo of him and Blizzy? - I wouldn't. 268 00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:08,228 - He's rotten deep into his bones. - Nonsense! 269 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,189 Look at his wittle hat! 270 00:12:10,189 --> 00:12:11,690 Say "cheese"! 271 00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:13,692 Aw. What a sweetie. 272 00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:15,777 Luxes! 273 00:12:15,777 --> 00:12:17,905 We knew they would fight back. 274 00:12:17,905 --> 00:12:20,199 We need to up your bad baby game. 275 00:12:20,199 --> 00:12:23,827 How do we go from infantile delinquent to baby desperado? 276 00:12:23,827 --> 00:12:27,456 Really make them quiver in their boots when you come-- [gasps] 277 00:12:27,456 --> 00:12:29,666 Riding into town. 278 00:12:32,503 --> 00:12:34,588 Hey, Precious. How's business? 279 00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:36,048 [whinnies] 280 00:12:36,048 --> 00:12:38,717 I've thought about you every day. 281 00:12:38,717 --> 00:12:40,677 You took a journey to self-discovery 282 00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,931 and wound up shilling for a Western-themed dental office? 283 00:12:43,931 --> 00:12:45,724 "Gums A-Blazin'." 284 00:12:45,724 --> 00:12:46,808 Oh, Precious. 285 00:12:46,808 --> 00:12:48,894 [whinnying] 286 00:12:48,894 --> 00:12:52,814 Yes, yes. Dr. Clem sounds like a real crackup. Mm-hm. 287 00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:55,317 You started writing a one-act play. 288 00:12:55,317 --> 00:12:57,694 We miss you and we need your help. 289 00:12:58,737 --> 00:13:01,698 To take down Crispin Biscuits. 290 00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:03,116 [whinnies angrily] 291 00:13:04,660 --> 00:13:05,911 [lullaby playing on stereo] 292 00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:09,498 When you spot him, I'll crank it, and no matter what bad thing he's doing, 293 00:13:09,498 --> 00:13:12,543 everyone will be like, "Oh, the lullaby makes it--" 294 00:13:12,543 --> 00:13:14,253 [Precious yells] 295 00:13:16,046 --> 00:13:17,548 Whoa! 296 00:13:17,548 --> 00:13:21,760 Oh, no. I just replanted after a goose incident. 297 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:26,598 I hate that baby and I have mixed feelings about that horse! 298 00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:36,149 I hate that baby! 299 00:13:36,149 --> 00:13:38,402 Crank the lullabies. Crank them. 300 00:13:38,402 --> 00:13:42,114 - [distorted lullaby playing] - I am trying, it's broken and haunted. 301 00:13:44,408 --> 00:13:46,076 [horns honking, Boss Baby laughing] 302 00:13:46,076 --> 00:13:48,245 [distorted lullaby continues] 303 00:13:48,245 --> 00:13:51,873 Keep trotting doughnuts, you beautiful untamed thing. 304 00:13:51,873 --> 00:13:55,627 That's pure loathing as far as the eye can see. 305 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:02,217 Delaying my commute and disrespecting karaoke? 306 00:14:02,217 --> 00:14:04,803 I hate that baby! 307 00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:10,767 Don't you transfer that money, Mr. Tigglesnooks. 308 00:14:10,767 --> 00:14:12,060 [meowing] 309 00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:16,523 I don't care how much hate he earned. I want to change the rules again. 310 00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:17,816 [meows] 311 00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:22,112 No, I do not have a Form Z2427 filled out, 312 00:14:22,112 --> 00:14:23,822 nor do I have time for-- 313 00:14:23,822 --> 00:14:25,198 [grumbling] 314 00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:26,700 ♪ Opa, opa, opa! ♪ 315 00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,619 ♪ They hate you They hate you ♪ 316 00:14:28,619 --> 00:14:29,953 ♪ Opa, opa, opa! ♪ 317 00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:31,747 ♪ They hate your guts ♪ 318 00:14:31,747 --> 00:14:35,042 Simmons, I've got Giancarlo Crunch on the line. 319 00:14:35,042 --> 00:14:38,545 Don't you lay a finger on my Didier. I'm buying him back. 320 00:14:38,545 --> 00:14:40,881 Then I'm buying an even bigger monster truck 321 00:14:40,881 --> 00:14:44,343 to crush your truck so you can know how it feels. 322 00:14:44,343 --> 00:14:46,803 - How's the client backlog, Pip? - Just one baby. 323 00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:49,348 And he's only here because he forgot his juice. 324 00:14:49,348 --> 00:14:51,725 - [all cheering] - Great job. 325 00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:54,895 Well, aren't you all happy. 326 00:14:54,895 --> 00:14:58,398 Aw, did you not get to see the hope draining from these eyes? 327 00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,525 You sure? Look closer. 328 00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:03,570 Ooh. I'm a still a happy peeper. 329 00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:06,031 Hmm. Yes, very amusing eyeball. 330 00:15:06,031 --> 00:15:08,408 You know I'm never going to stop. 331 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:12,788 I love games with my play-friends. I could carry on forever. 332 00:15:12,788 --> 00:15:15,165 How many times do you think you can beat me? 333 00:15:15,165 --> 00:15:17,042 As many as we have to. 334 00:15:17,042 --> 00:15:19,503 Ah. But what if I made it only once? 335 00:15:19,503 --> 00:15:21,838 - What if I offered you... - [knocking on door] 336 00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:27,386 one final game. 337 00:15:28,470 --> 00:15:29,972 For keepsies. 338 00:15:35,686 --> 00:15:37,312 Just this once more? 339 00:15:37,312 --> 00:15:39,022 Then I'm all yours. 340 00:15:39,690 --> 00:15:42,567 - For keepsies. - Promise you'll be careful. 341 00:15:45,946 --> 00:15:48,073 Careful's my middle name. 342 00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:52,119 It's Lily. 343 00:15:53,328 --> 00:15:55,372 Welcome, play-friends. 344 00:15:55,372 --> 00:15:59,209 Who wants to play indoor-hay-maze-water-balloon fight? 345 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:01,169 Always balloons with this guy. 346 00:16:01,169 --> 00:16:06,800 Silly sourpuss, I filled these balloons with something sure to thrill you. 347 00:16:12,639 --> 00:16:15,267 Reverse super-concentrated formula. 348 00:16:15,267 --> 00:16:19,938 Ages any baby into an adult on contact, permanently. 349 00:16:19,938 --> 00:16:21,940 Ugh. Disgusting. 350 00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:22,899 But fair. 351 00:16:22,899 --> 00:16:25,152 I don't want to grow up into a boring adult 352 00:16:25,152 --> 00:16:28,113 any more than Tina wants to lose mommy-baby time, 353 00:16:28,113 --> 00:16:31,658 or Boss Baby wants to be exposed as a grown-up fugitive. 354 00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:34,870 Same danger, same amount of balloons. 355 00:16:34,870 --> 00:16:37,998 But wait, two on one isn't fair at all. 356 00:16:37,998 --> 00:16:40,125 - Hello, hi. - Hi, hello. 357 00:16:40,125 --> 00:16:42,252 Honestly, Luxes? New low. 358 00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:45,839 The game is what it is. We always back the winners. 359 00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:47,674 Three on two isn't fair either. 360 00:16:48,467 --> 00:16:52,012 [Pull-String CEO] Keep your reward, mayor. These pockets ain't hungry. 361 00:16:52,012 --> 00:16:53,847 - Happy? - No! 362 00:16:53,847 --> 00:16:55,766 Too bad, it's playtime. 363 00:16:55,766 --> 00:16:57,517 Into the maze. 364 00:16:59,227 --> 00:17:00,395 [both gasp] 365 00:17:10,322 --> 00:17:11,865 [shouting and yelling] 366 00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:31,968 I can't believe how close we are. 367 00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:34,888 One good shot away from getting rid of Crispin for good. 368 00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:37,057 Or one bad shot and I come home to Mommy 369 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,309 as some weirdo adult she doesn't recognize. 370 00:17:39,309 --> 00:17:41,812 Save that for your first trip home from college. 371 00:17:41,812 --> 00:17:43,355 We need to change the game. 372 00:17:43,355 --> 00:17:47,484 Got any strategies for some water tanks and a rusty bucket? 373 00:17:47,484 --> 00:17:51,363 - Not much here to work with. - This is for Mommy. 374 00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:52,280 Tina! 375 00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:55,700 All right, Crispin Biscuits, listen. 376 00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:58,537 No matter how many times you come at us, 377 00:17:58,537 --> 00:18:01,873 if the game is to make us lose hope, you can't win. 378 00:18:01,873 --> 00:18:05,377 Hope is what we do. It's why we started our company. 379 00:18:05,377 --> 00:18:08,713 [Crispin] I told you, I don't care about your business. 380 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:11,633 But that's the thing, our business cares about you. 381 00:18:11,633 --> 00:18:13,468 No matter how bad you are. 382 00:18:13,468 --> 00:18:17,305 We have hope because we believe no baby is beyond hope. 383 00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:22,018 There's a good baby inside everyone. We can help you find yours. 384 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:31,903 Did you mean to spare us, or do you have terrible aim? 385 00:18:31,903 --> 00:18:35,323 I saw it. Tina's words got to you. 386 00:18:35,323 --> 00:18:38,952 Somewhere inside that cold, indifferent shell, you have a heart. 387 00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:41,538 Probably just one shared, but still. 388 00:18:41,538 --> 00:18:44,958 Like we said, we back winners. And Tina's speech? 389 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:47,878 It positively stank of big winner attitude. 390 00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:50,463 So you're on our side now? 391 00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:54,801 Hmm. Tentative. But right now you got the momentum. 392 00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:56,344 Good. What's your skill set? 393 00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:59,681 We are masters of the five largest Luxembourgian industries. 394 00:18:59,681 --> 00:19:02,267 Banking, fashion modeling, steelwork, 395 00:19:02,267 --> 00:19:04,603 animal snares involving complex rope knots-- 396 00:19:04,603 --> 00:19:06,938 [stammers] Let's use that last one. 397 00:19:06,938 --> 00:19:09,316 Let us help you change, Crispin! 398 00:19:09,316 --> 00:19:12,527 [Crispin] No, thank you. I like me, a lot. 399 00:19:12,527 --> 00:19:14,571 I'm very fun. 400 00:19:16,615 --> 00:19:17,616 [yells] 401 00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:24,539 Is that a pull-string? [yells] 402 00:19:24,539 --> 00:19:28,543 [Pull-String CEO] In every man's gut, there's a pair of junkyard raccoons. 403 00:19:28,543 --> 00:19:32,380 One's got a honey ham hock, and the other hasn't eaten in days. 404 00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:34,507 - Tina! - Two raccoons... 405 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:38,887 We can make the rope knot snares, but we don't control who steps into them. 406 00:19:38,887 --> 00:19:40,764 [Pull-String CEO] So who do I trust? 407 00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:45,435 - The one with a belly full of holiday... - Luxes! I need ammunition. 408 00:19:45,435 --> 00:19:47,270 - Absolutely, sir. - What? 409 00:19:47,270 --> 00:19:50,774 You double-backstabber, you switched to our side. 410 00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:54,653 The game changed again. Our loyalties were tentative. 411 00:19:54,653 --> 00:19:55,570 [screaming] 412 00:19:55,570 --> 00:19:58,073 [Pull-String CEO] And the reason you're about to-- 413 00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:03,119 And there's the hope draining from your eyes. 414 00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:04,913 Bye-bye. Bye-bye. 415 00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:06,039 No! 416 00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:12,754 [yells] 417 00:20:12,754 --> 00:20:15,632 - Why is my face dripping regular formula? - What? 418 00:20:15,632 --> 00:20:18,718 Guess who found a plan for the rusty bucket? 419 00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:19,844 Take cover! 420 00:20:22,138 --> 00:20:25,517 And guess who also mastered Luxembourg's fifth-largest industry... 421 00:20:25,517 --> 00:20:27,269 acting! 422 00:20:27,269 --> 00:20:28,895 Hilde, pull! 423 00:20:36,695 --> 00:20:37,821 No! 424 00:20:37,821 --> 00:20:39,322 [whimpering] 425 00:20:48,164 --> 00:20:51,084 - You made me the bait? - [Crispin] Hello. 426 00:20:51,084 --> 00:20:55,213 Can anyone tell me why I'm in an indoor hay maze with babies 427 00:20:55,213 --> 00:20:58,008 and a rather puzzling bout of amnesia? 428 00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:01,303 In America? 429 00:21:01,303 --> 00:21:02,470 [groans] 430 00:21:02,470 --> 00:21:03,805 Whee! 431 00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:05,890 Oh, I missed you, chair. 432 00:21:05,890 --> 00:21:09,019 Mr. Tigglesnooks can draw up the paperwork, 433 00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:10,770 but you wanna do this? 434 00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,272 We have no choice. 435 00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:14,607 It's a Baby Love economy again, 436 00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:17,861 and Baby Corp's reputation with babies has been, 437 00:21:17,861 --> 00:21:19,612 in a word, eaten alive by bears. 438 00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:21,740 [Agnes] Boss Baby, Tina Templeton. 439 00:21:21,740 --> 00:21:27,078 Your company must purchase Baby Corp, or there will soon be no Baby Corp. 440 00:21:27,078 --> 00:21:30,498 An attractive offer. But it's not really our call. 441 00:21:30,498 --> 00:21:34,294 Someone owns 98% of our company's stock options. 442 00:21:34,294 --> 00:21:37,255 Baby Corp, a Mayonnaise City Company. 443 00:21:37,255 --> 00:21:39,049 I like the sound of that. 444 00:21:39,883 --> 00:21:45,263 Hi! Uh, I just wanted to say you'll be in great hands with Teddy, 445 00:21:45,263 --> 00:21:49,142 and, well, even though I may not remember any of it, 446 00:21:49,142 --> 00:21:53,563 working with you all has been the greatest time of my life. 447 00:21:54,105 --> 00:21:56,358 So, yeah, uh, there's cake. 448 00:21:57,734 --> 00:21:59,903 Feeling okay? You wanna do this? 449 00:21:59,903 --> 00:22:01,946 I've never felt better. 450 00:22:01,946 --> 00:22:03,656 [cell phone ringing] 451 00:22:04,616 --> 00:22:08,244 - Benji? - Turn it on! Channel Eight, I'm on TV! 452 00:22:08,244 --> 00:22:12,457 But the real break in the case came from this British amnesia patient 453 00:22:12,457 --> 00:22:14,876 with a curiously detailed back tattoo. 454 00:22:14,876 --> 00:22:18,421 Would you repeat the words on your ink for the folks at home, sir? 455 00:22:18,421 --> 00:22:22,133 Hi. Certainly. If it helps anyone figure out who I am. 456 00:22:22,133 --> 00:22:25,011 "Fugitive embezzler Theodore Templeton 457 00:22:25,011 --> 00:22:30,266 got experimental plastic surgery and is hiding out as a baby." 458 00:22:30,266 --> 00:22:32,602 - Oh, no. - What? 459 00:22:33,394 --> 00:22:35,480 Mommy? I-- 460 00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:37,357 I can't yet. 461 00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:38,650 I know. 462 00:22:38,650 --> 00:22:41,778 I... gotta run. 463 00:22:43,404 --> 00:22:44,989 [theme music playing] 464 00:22:47,617 --> 00:22:54,124 - ♪ Boss Baby ♪ - ♪ Baby ♪ 465 00:22:56,835 --> 00:22:59,170 - ♪ Boss Baby ♪ - ♪ Tell 'em who this is ♪ 466 00:22:59,170 --> 00:23:01,631 - ♪ Boss Baby ♪ - ♪ I'm a legend mythic ♪ 467 00:23:01,631 --> 00:23:04,384 ♪ Y'all heard the story But you know what the twist is? ♪ 468 00:23:04,384 --> 00:23:07,178 ♪ Welcome to the family business Boss Baby ♪