1
00:00:18,375 --> 00:00:21,745
["Figaro's Aria"
from The Barber of Seville playing]
2
00:00:28,785 --> 00:00:32,156
[vocalising to "Figaro's Aria"]
3
00:00:32,156 --> 00:00:34,591
[vocalising continues]
4
00:00:34,591 --> 00:00:38,062
[all vocalising]
5
00:00:38,062 --> 00:00:41,899
[phone operator] Thank you for holding.
You are number three in the queue.
6
00:00:41,899 --> 00:00:43,567
- Get in. Three.
- Yes!
7
00:00:43,567 --> 00:00:45,702
- [music continues on phone]
- Nervous.
8
00:00:46,670 --> 00:00:49,807
[all vocalising]
9
00:00:49,807 --> 00:00:52,576
Enough. What is it, a stag night?
10
00:00:52,576 --> 00:00:54,678
They charge for them phone lines and all.
11
00:00:57,581 --> 00:01:00,283
He said, "They charge
for them phone lines and all."
12
00:01:00,851 --> 00:01:01,885
Guy.
13
00:01:03,820 --> 00:01:04,988
[sighs]
14
00:01:04,988 --> 00:01:07,223
Go on then. Get him a slice of cake.
15
00:01:07,991 --> 00:01:09,026
[clears throat]
16
00:01:09,026 --> 00:01:10,894
[clinks mug]
17
00:01:12,095 --> 00:01:14,932
[sighs] And another round of teas.
18
00:01:14,932 --> 00:01:15,999
Thank you.
19
00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:17,835
[music stops]
20
00:01:17,835 --> 00:01:19,570
Hello? Hello?
21
00:01:19,570 --> 00:01:21,572
[phone operator]
Thank you for holding, Mr Mitchell.
22
00:01:21,572 --> 00:01:23,273
I've checked with my supervisor,
23
00:01:23,273 --> 00:01:26,276
and your nearest disability assessment
is in Castleford.
24
00:01:26,276 --> 00:01:28,545
But-- But how am I gonna get to Cas?
25
00:01:29,212 --> 00:01:30,814
I live in Sheffield.
26
00:01:31,215 --> 00:01:36,019
And my mobility scooter only does
eight miles to the hour on a full battery
27
00:01:36,019 --> 00:01:37,988
with a following wind.
28
00:01:37,988 --> 00:01:41,492
I'm afraid travel arrangements
are the responsibility of the client.
29
00:01:41,492 --> 00:01:43,293
Number 17 bus goes to Castleford.
30
00:01:43,293 --> 00:01:46,230
Discontinued, mate. Like every
other fucking thing around here.
31
00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:47,898
[phone operator] Hello?
32
00:01:47,898 --> 00:01:50,034
I'm only authorised
to speak to the client.
33
00:01:50,034 --> 00:01:51,835
[whispering] Ask about travel expenses.
34
00:01:51,835 --> 00:01:53,871
Do I get travelling expenses?
35
00:01:53,871 --> 00:01:55,572
Ha! Dream on.
36
00:01:55,572 --> 00:01:57,541
I'm afraid travel to
and from the assessment
37
00:01:57,541 --> 00:01:59,743
is the responsibility of the client.
38
00:02:00,144 --> 00:02:02,012
But how am I gonna get there, kid?
39
00:02:02,012 --> 00:02:04,248
I'm obliged to inform you that failure
to attend the interview
40
00:02:04,248 --> 00:02:07,251
will automatically make you ineligible
for disability living allowance
41
00:02:07,251 --> 00:02:10,186
and therefore categorised as fit for work.
42
00:02:10,787 --> 00:02:13,190
Fit for work? He's only got one lung.
43
00:02:13,190 --> 00:02:14,258
And a dodgy leg.
44
00:02:14,258 --> 00:02:15,959
He's diabetic.
45
00:02:15,959 --> 00:02:18,662
Frankly, it's a miracle
the old bugger's still alive.
46
00:02:20,063 --> 00:02:21,732
Cheers, lads.
47
00:02:21,732 --> 00:02:23,600
Look, I just read out what it says
on the computer.
48
00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:26,003
Don't shoot the bloody messenger,
all right?
49
00:02:26,003 --> 00:02:28,038
[line clicks, dial tone]
50
00:02:28,038 --> 00:02:29,773
- ["Figaro's Aria" resumes]
- [sighs]
51
00:02:31,141 --> 00:02:32,242
Well, that went well.
52
00:02:37,581 --> 00:02:40,551
[Ant mumbling] these voices is good.
These voices is my voice.
53
00:02:40,551 --> 00:02:42,619
It's-- It's a good voice. Good voice
54
00:02:42,619 --> 00:02:43,954
[mumbling]
55
00:02:43,954 --> 00:02:46,523
[Gaz] Tea, coffee, garibaldis?
56
00:02:46,523 --> 00:02:48,125
[wheels squeaking]
57
00:02:48,125 --> 00:02:49,760
You still here?
58
00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:52,228
Agency nurse never showed.
Surprise, surprise.
59
00:02:52,762 --> 00:02:55,132
And matey's gone
all John the Baptist again.
60
00:02:55,132 --> 00:02:57,133
He reckons Satan's coming to behead him.
61
00:02:57,534 --> 00:03:00,504
- He's in telly room watching Countdown.
- [chuckles]
62
00:03:00,504 --> 00:03:03,840
Had enough sedatives to knock
a rhino out, and he's still going.
63
00:03:04,374 --> 00:03:06,710
So, muggins is on suicide watch.
64
00:03:07,878 --> 00:03:09,646
Give us a cup of coffee, will you?
65
00:03:11,281 --> 00:03:12,615
[Gaz] Here you go, love.
66
00:03:13,016 --> 00:03:14,050
[clears throat] Ta.
67
00:03:15,619 --> 00:03:16,653
[groaning]
68
00:03:17,721 --> 00:03:19,990
[Ant grunting]
69
00:03:20,458 --> 00:03:23,560
You're all right, Ant.
You're all right. You're all right.
70
00:03:24,127 --> 00:03:25,261
You're all right.
71
00:03:25,896 --> 00:03:27,765
[Ant grunts]
72
00:03:27,765 --> 00:03:28,832
You're okay.
73
00:03:28,832 --> 00:03:30,200
[Ant grunts]
74
00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:31,801
You're all right.
75
00:03:32,369 --> 00:03:35,705
- Shit.
- [Ant groaning]
76
00:03:37,741 --> 00:03:40,477
When the meds are too high,
they can go into spasm.
77
00:03:42,079 --> 00:03:43,113
That were the meds?
78
00:03:44,181 --> 00:03:45,949
Then lower the bloody dose.
79
00:03:45,949 --> 00:03:49,519
Can't. Easier to handle
when they're doped up to their eyeballs.
80
00:03:49,987 --> 00:03:51,221
We're that short-staffed.
81
00:03:51,955 --> 00:03:54,057
Does any of this actually do any good?
82
00:03:54,892 --> 00:03:57,460
It's a bit like MasterChef with pills,
to be honest.
83
00:03:57,861 --> 00:03:59,896
Improvise with the ingredients provided.
84
00:04:01,665 --> 00:04:04,134
- Most of them end up in the loop.
- Hmm?
85
00:04:04,134 --> 00:04:06,503
Zombified with the meds,
crazy without them.
86
00:04:07,037 --> 00:04:10,907
Cheapest way to go.
And it's all about cheap round here.
87
00:04:11,541 --> 00:04:13,143
That's not right, isn't that?
88
00:04:13,611 --> 00:04:15,045
Write your MP, love.
89
00:04:15,479 --> 00:04:17,915
And while you're at it, mention the pay.
[coughs]
90
00:04:17,915 --> 00:04:19,582
Oh, and the staffing levels.
91
00:04:20,684 --> 00:04:22,953
[siren wails in distance]
92
00:04:22,953 --> 00:04:24,454
[students chattering]
93
00:04:34,231 --> 00:04:36,066
Dean. Here.
94
00:04:37,267 --> 00:04:38,468
You all right?
95
00:04:39,936 --> 00:04:41,538
Just wondering, uh--
96
00:04:42,106 --> 00:04:43,707
- How's your mum?
- Fine.
97
00:04:46,176 --> 00:04:47,811
- Home?
- Yeah.
98
00:04:50,747 --> 00:04:52,182
- You?
- Fine.
99
00:04:53,750 --> 00:04:55,185
- Home?
- Yeah.
100
00:04:57,087 --> 00:05:01,124
So, summing up, that's everybody's fine
and everybody's home?
101
00:05:01,725 --> 00:05:02,759
Yeah.
102
00:05:04,528 --> 00:05:05,696
Fine.
103
00:05:05,696 --> 00:05:07,564
- Can I go now?
- Sure.
104
00:05:13,737 --> 00:05:15,105
[sighs]
105
00:05:15,105 --> 00:05:18,174
["French Shanty 1" playing]
106
00:05:23,847 --> 00:05:25,616
Never a truer word, mate.
107
00:05:25,616 --> 00:05:29,887
- Sorry?
- Grand pain. Life in a nutshell, that is.
108
00:05:29,887 --> 00:05:32,088
No. Le Grand Pain.
109
00:05:33,190 --> 00:05:34,224
French.
110
00:05:35,759 --> 00:05:37,795
["French Shanty 1" continues]
111
00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:40,497
It's not "pain," it's "pan".
112
00:05:40,497 --> 00:05:42,098
Le Grand Pain .
113
00:05:42,599 --> 00:05:45,836
- Like Peter Pan.
- Exactly.
114
00:05:45,836 --> 00:05:49,239
It's French, Horse, for "big bread".
115
00:05:49,239 --> 00:05:50,307
Oh, I get it.
116
00:05:50,307 --> 00:05:51,742
Et voilà.
117
00:05:51,742 --> 00:05:55,211
- So, you're doing, um, baguettes?
- No.
118
00:05:55,846 --> 00:05:56,980
Croissants?
119
00:05:56,980 --> 00:05:59,516
- Uh, croissant .
- No.
120
00:05:59,516 --> 00:06:01,618
Flaky pastries with chocolate in?
121
00:06:01,618 --> 00:06:03,320
[Darren, Gerald] Pain au chocolat.
122
00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:05,588
No. Just baps.
123
00:06:06,056 --> 00:06:07,857
- Big baps?
- Yes, big baps!
124
00:06:08,825 --> 00:06:12,663
Look, this is neither an after-school
French club nor a heated bus stop.
125
00:06:12,663 --> 00:06:14,131
Arrêt de bus.
126
00:06:14,131 --> 00:06:16,066
I'm warning you two.
127
00:06:16,066 --> 00:06:22,206
This is a café-- A-A bistro, where folks
come to exchange money for food.
128
00:06:22,206 --> 00:06:23,974
What the chuff you having?
129
00:06:23,974 --> 00:06:28,345
All right, all right.
I will have a, um-- A fried egg, um
130
00:06:28,345 --> 00:06:32,916
Oeuf au sandwich. Merci.
131
00:06:37,587 --> 00:06:39,890
Fried egg bap. Coming up.
132
00:06:39,890 --> 00:06:42,525
[sighs] I don't know why I bloody bother.
133
00:06:43,326 --> 00:06:46,830
I was offered a bistro in Paris, you know?
134
00:06:46,830 --> 00:06:49,933
How I washed up here with you lot,
I'll never know.
135
00:06:49,933 --> 00:06:51,802
Cal, do you want owt else, love?
136
00:06:51,802 --> 00:06:55,139
I'm fine. Thanks, Grandad.
We've gotta get back to school.
137
00:06:55,139 --> 00:06:58,675
Don't call me that. How many times?
138
00:06:58,675 --> 00:06:59,743
[sighs]
139
00:07:00,210 --> 00:07:01,878
[slurps]
140
00:07:04,247 --> 00:07:08,685
Des has been really weird since,
you know, the dog.
141
00:07:09,253 --> 00:07:10,888
Then they binned her music course.
142
00:07:10,888 --> 00:07:13,023
Mmm. Don't see what we can do about that.
143
00:07:13,457 --> 00:07:16,526
Any road, she keeps bunking school
and ghosting me, so.
144
00:07:16,927 --> 00:07:20,564
- Well, exactly. Ghosting a bezzie mate
- [chuckles]
145
00:07:20,564 --> 00:07:21,731
What? She loves you.
146
00:07:22,299 --> 00:07:25,635
- She what?
- In a Des kind of way.
147
00:07:26,737 --> 00:07:28,672
Hmm. How'd you know that?
148
00:07:30,073 --> 00:07:32,509
Are you-- Do you fancy her?
149
00:07:32,509 --> 00:07:35,078
[chuckles] Des? Me?
150
00:07:36,680 --> 00:07:38,816
No. What?
151
00:07:38,816 --> 00:07:41,518
It's okay. You can fancy somebody, Cal.
152
00:07:42,652 --> 00:07:44,187
God, boys are weird.
153
00:07:49,474 --> 00:07:53,055
[chattering on radio]
154
00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:54,690
We're doing self-portraits today.
155
00:07:55,291 --> 00:07:57,393
[groans] Yeah.
156
00:07:57,393 --> 00:07:59,995
- Some of us.
- So I see.
157
00:08:05,481 --> 00:08:07,649
Oh. Tenerife?
158
00:08:09,785 --> 00:08:11,053
Hell.
159
00:08:11,620 --> 00:08:12,654
Nice.
160
00:08:17,660 --> 00:08:18,694
You did this?
161
00:08:20,296 --> 00:08:23,732
Yes. It's an ant. I'm Anthony. You see?
162
00:08:24,133 --> 00:08:26,201
[Gaz] I've seen that somewhere before.
163
00:08:27,236 --> 00:08:28,270
Ant.
164
00:08:34,276 --> 00:08:37,980
Gee, love, all right if I take
my friend here for a wander and a coffee?
165
00:08:40,182 --> 00:08:42,518
If you get me a latte
and don't burn down the place.
166
00:08:45,087 --> 00:08:46,154
Come on, kid.
167
00:08:54,663 --> 00:08:55,998
Are we escaping?
168
00:08:55,998 --> 00:08:57,166
Just for a while, kid.
169
00:09:00,669 --> 00:09:02,604
- That's you, innit?
- No.
170
00:09:05,274 --> 00:09:06,308
What's that then?
171
00:09:07,776 --> 00:09:09,645
Oh, uh-- Yeah, sorry.
172
00:09:10,046 --> 00:09:12,781
S-- [chuckles] Sorry? It's amazing!
173
00:09:13,482 --> 00:09:14,516
You're amazing!
174
00:09:16,652 --> 00:09:18,754
[stammers] Are we going back to the ward?
175
00:09:18,754 --> 00:09:22,358
Are we, bollocks.
You're giving me the full gallery tour.
176
00:09:22,358 --> 00:09:24,393
[French rap music playing]
177
00:09:27,062 --> 00:09:29,098
[music continues]
178
00:09:29,098 --> 00:09:30,465
[no audible dialogue]
179
00:09:36,372 --> 00:09:37,607
[no audible dialogue]
180
00:09:37,607 --> 00:09:40,042
[music continues]
181
00:09:41,510 --> 00:09:42,644
[no audible dialogue]
182
00:09:47,416 --> 00:09:49,651
[music continues]
183
00:09:53,422 --> 00:09:55,724
[music continues]
184
00:09:57,693 --> 00:09:59,695
[no audible dialogue]
185
00:10:01,830 --> 00:10:03,098
[music stops]
186
00:10:04,199 --> 00:10:05,234
All right.
187
00:10:05,234 --> 00:10:07,069
[classical music playing]
188
00:10:07,069 --> 00:10:10,539
Grab a menu, kid. Whatever you like.
The world's your oyster.
189
00:10:11,173 --> 00:10:12,207
Oysters are off.
190
00:10:13,208 --> 00:10:14,310
They were never on.
191
00:10:14,310 --> 00:10:16,078
[Dennis] If it's seafood you're after,
192
00:10:16,078 --> 00:10:18,481
we do a fish finger sandwich
on a Monday and Wednesday.
193
00:10:18,481 --> 00:10:22,351
Ladies and gents,
you are in the presence of genius.
194
00:10:22,351 --> 00:10:24,053
Give me strength. [sighs]
195
00:10:24,053 --> 00:10:26,322
Never one to undersell yourself,
eh, Garry?
196
00:10:26,322 --> 00:10:28,257
No, not me, you divvy. Him!
197
00:10:28,791 --> 00:10:33,295
Meet Ant the Man.
Sheffield's next big thing.
198
00:10:33,763 --> 00:10:38,301
You'll all be able to tell your grandkids
you knew him before he were famous.
199
00:10:38,301 --> 00:10:42,004
And what does Sheffield's next big thing
have to say for himself?
200
00:10:42,471 --> 00:10:43,505
Um
201
00:10:44,807 --> 00:10:46,975
Can I-- Can I have a cup of tea, please?
202
00:10:50,346 --> 00:10:51,380
[whispers] Sit here.
203
00:10:58,587 --> 00:11:00,255
[Hetty] Oh, you two.
204
00:11:01,457 --> 00:11:03,259
I'm retired. Bugger off.
205
00:11:03,259 --> 00:11:04,627
It's about Destiny.
206
00:11:04,627 --> 00:11:07,296
Murder, manslaughter, or GBH?
207
00:11:07,296 --> 00:11:08,997
That's defamation, that is.
208
00:11:09,398 --> 00:11:10,666
We did it in civics.
209
00:11:11,134 --> 00:11:14,303
You always were a bright lad, Cal.
I worry for you.
210
00:11:15,237 --> 00:11:17,106
She's really down about her music.
211
00:11:17,106 --> 00:11:19,008
You said you'd help her get into college.
212
00:11:19,008 --> 00:11:21,677
I did when I was a teacher, yeah,
but I'm not a teacher anymore, am I?
213
00:11:22,478 --> 00:11:23,613
You're not gonna help?
214
00:11:23,613 --> 00:11:26,048
I don't know how else to say this, love.
215
00:11:26,649 --> 00:11:28,184
Retired, fired.
216
00:11:28,184 --> 00:11:29,252
No!
217
00:11:29,252 --> 00:11:30,786
Des liked you.
218
00:11:30,786 --> 00:11:33,288
That's like having a reference
from the Moors Murderer.
219
00:11:33,756 --> 00:11:35,157
That's not very nice, is it?
220
00:11:35,157 --> 00:11:36,225
I'm not, love.
221
00:11:37,459 --> 00:11:39,462
Anything else I can help you with?
222
00:11:39,462 --> 00:11:40,529
Come on, Cal.
223
00:11:49,204 --> 00:11:51,240
[classical music playing]
224
00:11:52,041 --> 00:11:55,578
I've been on at the council all year
trying to get rid of that.
225
00:11:55,578 --> 00:11:58,648
Vandalism. Nothing more, nothing less.
226
00:11:58,648 --> 00:12:01,250
The guy whose house it is
said I could do it.
227
00:12:01,250 --> 00:12:03,753
Very good for house prices
is the right sort of graffiti.
228
00:12:03,753 --> 00:12:05,488
That looks like the wrong sort to me.
229
00:12:05,488 --> 00:12:07,056
Don't mind him.
230
00:12:07,056 --> 00:12:08,590
It's graffiti art.
231
00:12:09,091 --> 00:12:11,394
Ant the Man were bigger than Banksy
in his day.
232
00:12:11,394 --> 00:12:12,594
What happened?
233
00:12:15,464 --> 00:12:17,699
He disappeared. Artists do that.
234
00:12:18,167 --> 00:12:20,702
But now he's back.
Know what Banksy fetches?
235
00:12:22,071 --> 00:12:24,207
Thousands. Millions.
236
00:12:24,207 --> 00:12:25,741
Yeah, but I'm-- I'm not Banksy.
237
00:12:26,142 --> 00:12:29,745
Yeah, well, Banksy weren't Banksy
till he were Banksy, were he?
238
00:12:30,613 --> 00:12:31,647
What was he?
239
00:12:32,081 --> 00:12:34,517
Minimum wage sucker like the rest of us.
240
00:12:34,517 --> 00:12:36,419
My advice, young'un. [sighs]
241
00:12:36,419 --> 00:12:37,786
Don't get involved.
242
00:12:38,287 --> 00:12:41,490
Whatever crazy scheme
he's cooked up, just say no.
243
00:12:41,958 --> 00:12:44,660
Spoken with all the ambition
of a school caretaker.
244
00:12:47,396 --> 00:12:48,430
Twat.
245
00:12:49,832 --> 00:12:52,034
[skateboard rolling]
246
00:13:06,215 --> 00:13:07,382
[brakes squeal]
247
00:13:08,784 --> 00:13:12,521
Whoa! You need a hi-vis vest on that.
248
00:13:12,521 --> 00:13:14,423
Oh, that'd be fashion-forward, miss.
249
00:13:18,494 --> 00:13:19,628
This is for you.
250
00:13:21,297 --> 00:13:22,698
Won't Jurassic Park miss it?
251
00:13:23,466 --> 00:13:25,467
Good enough for Little Simz's last album.
252
00:13:26,402 --> 00:13:29,138
Eh. Thanks, but no thanks.
253
00:13:29,138 --> 00:13:31,774
All right. I'll just leave it here then.
254
00:13:31,774 --> 00:13:33,175
I said no thanks.
255
00:13:33,676 --> 00:13:37,246
And I said I'd be getting you through
that Hallam entrance exam.
256
00:13:37,747 --> 00:13:41,450
And I am way more stubborn, even than you,
so don't fucking bother.
257
00:13:42,751 --> 00:13:45,021
Not a teacher. Allowed to swear.
258
00:13:45,021 --> 00:13:46,221
[lighter flicks]
259
00:13:48,090 --> 00:13:49,124
So?
260
00:13:51,060 --> 00:13:52,528
What's the catch?
261
00:13:52,528 --> 00:13:55,330
Good girl. Learn that one early.
There's always a catch.
262
00:13:56,098 --> 00:13:59,735
I want you and your mates for one hour
on a Friday evening after school.
263
00:13:59,735 --> 00:14:01,103
Which mates?
264
00:14:01,103 --> 00:14:02,337
Honestly?
265
00:14:02,938 --> 00:14:04,706
The more dead-end, the better.
266
00:14:05,841 --> 00:14:07,043
[sighs]
267
00:14:07,043 --> 00:14:08,110
[inhales sharply]
268
00:14:08,711 --> 00:14:12,014
Four o'clock. Don't be late.
269
00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:21,490
Right. This is gonna be
the greatest comeback since Rocky.
270
00:14:22,324 --> 00:14:24,126
Are you ready to rumble?
271
00:14:24,961 --> 00:14:28,497
Rising up, back on the street ♪
272
00:14:29,431 --> 00:14:30,533
Do you mean homeless?
273
00:14:30,533 --> 00:14:32,468
No. "Eye of the Tiger"!
274
00:14:32,468 --> 00:14:37,039
Ant, wall. Wall, Ant.
275
00:14:37,039 --> 00:14:38,106
Go.
276
00:14:39,141 --> 00:14:40,275
[sighs]
277
00:14:42,711 --> 00:14:44,346
Go mad, fella.
278
00:14:45,848 --> 00:14:47,049
Uh, I can't.
279
00:14:48,717 --> 00:14:49,751
Why not?
280
00:14:50,419 --> 00:14:54,423
The-The thing that makes me paint,
you know, the buzz?
281
00:14:55,224 --> 00:14:56,325
It's gone.
282
00:14:57,459 --> 00:14:58,461
Gone where?
283
00:14:58,461 --> 00:14:59,628
It's the pills.
284
00:15:00,529 --> 00:15:02,397
[sighs] Th-They-- They make me--
285
00:15:03,599 --> 00:15:05,501
[sighs] Sorry, sorry, sorry.
286
00:15:06,035 --> 00:15:10,039
Once upon a time, only way
a working-class bloke can make it were
287
00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:14,210
football, boxing, rock and roll.
288
00:15:14,210 --> 00:15:15,611
But now there's this.
289
00:15:16,412 --> 00:15:17,513
Your painting.
290
00:15:18,081 --> 00:15:20,683
You got summat
you can make real money out of.
291
00:15:20,683 --> 00:15:22,451
I never did it for the money.
292
00:15:22,451 --> 00:15:25,087
That-- That Damien Hirst.
293
00:15:25,488 --> 00:15:29,391
He lived in a council estate
before he started fucking pickling sharks.
294
00:15:29,792 --> 00:15:31,394
Do you know where he lives now?
295
00:15:31,394 --> 00:15:32,494
A palace!
296
00:15:33,329 --> 00:15:34,563
I'm telling ya.
297
00:15:35,231 --> 00:15:39,202
Being skint is shite
for your mental health.
298
00:15:39,202 --> 00:15:42,638
Now, get on with it. Spray, man, spray.
299
00:15:44,440 --> 00:15:45,741
[breathes shakily]
300
00:15:45,741 --> 00:15:48,377
No, I can't, all right? I can't.
301
00:15:48,377 --> 00:15:49,579
Just try.
302
00:15:49,579 --> 00:15:50,813
- Look, I can't.
- Ant, you can.
303
00:15:50,813 --> 00:15:52,215
- I can't, Gaz!
- You can!
304
00:15:52,215 --> 00:15:53,282
No, I can't!
305
00:15:53,282 --> 00:15:54,783
Can we just go back now, please?
306
00:16:04,460 --> 00:16:07,430
- [TV commentator, indistinct]
- Go on, mate. Pass it then.
307
00:16:07,430 --> 00:16:08,497
Come on.
308
00:16:09,498 --> 00:16:14,503
That lad was a genius
till you lot bombed him out on pills.
309
00:16:14,971 --> 00:16:18,274
When he gets out of here, he can
go to the self-help group, can't he?
310
00:16:18,274 --> 00:16:19,742
[TV continues, indistinct]
311
00:16:19,742 --> 00:16:21,176
On the board.
312
00:16:22,711 --> 00:16:24,313
They'll show him how to taper.
313
00:16:24,813 --> 00:16:26,015
Taper?
314
00:16:26,015 --> 00:16:28,116
Gradual withdrawal from the pills.
315
00:16:29,685 --> 00:16:31,353
Loads of people manage without them
316
00:16:32,354 --> 00:16:33,522
if they come off slowly.
317
00:16:34,156 --> 00:16:36,658
Then maybe he'll start doing
his graffiti stuff again.
318
00:16:39,728 --> 00:16:41,296
How does he get out of here?
319
00:16:41,797 --> 00:16:43,766
Well, that's the catch, isn't it?
320
00:16:43,766 --> 00:16:47,069
You gotta be well enough to get out
of here to go to the self-help group.
321
00:16:47,069 --> 00:16:49,705
But you need the self-help group
to be well enough to get out of here.
322
00:16:53,142 --> 00:16:54,810
[patient] What's he doing?
323
00:16:54,810 --> 00:16:56,646
What is that?
324
00:16:56,646 --> 00:16:58,280
[TV commentator, indistinct]
325
00:17:14,129 --> 00:17:16,732
My name's Garry. Everyone calls me Gaz.
326
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:20,436
This is Gaz's first time
at the Grain of Sand Project.
327
00:17:20,436 --> 00:17:22,038
Welcome, Gaz.
328
00:17:22,038 --> 00:17:24,006
- [group] Welcome, Gaz.
- All right. All right.
329
00:17:24,006 --> 00:17:26,409
Everybody here has had similar challenges, Gaz.
330
00:17:26,409 --> 00:17:27,576
You're among friends.
331
00:17:28,144 --> 00:17:31,581
All of us have reduced
or have completely withdrawn
332
00:17:31,581 --> 00:17:35,051
from the anti-psychotic medication
prescribed for us.
333
00:17:35,051 --> 00:17:38,254
We do it by gradually tapering
our medication
334
00:17:38,254 --> 00:17:41,290
and sharing our problems
as a group together.
335
00:17:41,290 --> 00:17:43,592
We're here to help each other.
336
00:17:44,627 --> 00:17:46,662
As well as find support for ourselves.
337
00:17:46,662 --> 00:17:50,199
Nice one. Can I just say,
I'm not here for me. I'm here for a mate.
338
00:17:50,700 --> 00:17:53,669
- 'Course you are, love. [scoffs]
- I am.
339
00:17:53,669 --> 00:17:56,071
Everything's confidential here, Gaz.
340
00:17:56,539 --> 00:18:00,542
[chuckles] Really, I'm fine.
It's me mate who's mental.
341
00:18:04,580 --> 00:18:07,783
Well, this place is only for people
who have mental health issues,
342
00:18:07,783 --> 00:18:09,685
as we usually call them.
343
00:18:09,685 --> 00:18:14,256
So if your friend wants to come along,
he or she is more than welcome,
344
00:18:15,257 --> 00:18:17,025
but I'm afraid you will have to leave.
345
00:18:17,493 --> 00:18:18,494
Are you joking?
346
00:18:27,303 --> 00:18:30,739
All right, I was too embarrassed
to admit it. It-It's me.
347
00:18:31,307 --> 00:18:33,275
Mental as a talking toilet brush.
348
00:18:33,843 --> 00:18:36,078
That's a very brave step to take, Gaz--
349
00:18:36,078 --> 00:18:41,016
Thing is, now, Geoff, it's-it's the meds.
I-I'm not myself on pills.
350
00:18:41,417 --> 00:18:44,120
Normally quite creative.
Bit of this, a bit of that--
351
00:18:44,120 --> 00:18:46,622
Painting, mostly. Modern art, you know?
352
00:18:47,056 --> 00:18:50,092
On the gear? Zilch. Nada. Nothing.
353
00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:57,466
You--
You might say the creative fire has gone.
354
00:19:00,135 --> 00:19:01,470
I really need your help.
355
00:19:15,815 --> 00:19:16,849
[groans]
356
00:19:18,184 --> 00:19:20,186
I'll have to be quick. He's watching.
357
00:19:20,186 --> 00:19:24,023
Twenty-two years you've been together,
and he's still got the hump with me.
358
00:19:24,624 --> 00:19:27,927
Well, you and me-- You know.
359
00:19:28,427 --> 00:19:29,462
The past.
360
00:19:29,462 --> 00:19:31,531
Sexual electricity and that.
361
00:19:31,531 --> 00:19:33,766
That were 25 years ago, Lomper.
362
00:19:35,267 --> 00:19:37,303
So, come on. What's the big secret?
363
00:19:37,303 --> 00:19:42,375
Well, uh, Dennis don't know, all right?
But I need some money really badly.
364
00:19:42,375 --> 00:19:43,442
Right.
365
00:19:44,577 --> 00:19:47,012
Yeah, I should be able to help out.
366
00:19:48,114 --> 00:19:50,450
You can? Oh, cheers.
367
00:19:50,450 --> 00:19:51,750
Mates, aren't we?
368
00:19:52,418 --> 00:19:54,420
- How much do you need?
- Thirty grand.
369
00:19:57,189 --> 00:19:58,857
[chuckles] Thirty grand?
370
00:19:59,892 --> 00:20:02,995
[laughs] Thirty-thousand pounds?
371
00:20:03,463 --> 00:20:05,965
Well, I'd take dollars or euros.
372
00:20:05,965 --> 00:20:07,734
I can't-- [scoffs]
373
00:20:07,734 --> 00:20:09,735
What the hell have you been doing, man?
374
00:20:10,469 --> 00:20:11,971
I cannot say. Don't matter.
375
00:20:11,971 --> 00:20:13,038
Lomper.
376
00:20:14,140 --> 00:20:15,174
Wait!
377
00:20:21,981 --> 00:20:24,083
These are back from my weed-dealing days.
378
00:20:24,483 --> 00:20:25,517
Still work.
379
00:20:26,752 --> 00:20:32,358
Start by taking 10% off at a time
just like the beardy guy said.
380
00:20:33,259 --> 00:20:34,727
And-And is it safe?
381
00:20:34,727 --> 00:20:35,895
As houses.
382
00:20:36,829 --> 00:20:37,863
Tried and tested.
383
00:20:39,165 --> 00:20:42,468
Tapering slowly, 10% at a time,
384
00:20:43,102 --> 00:20:45,471
stops the central nervous system
from crashing.
385
00:20:45,872 --> 00:20:48,908
What,
the central nervous system can crash?
386
00:20:48,908 --> 00:20:50,276
No, no. Never.
387
00:20:50,843 --> 00:20:52,077
Not usually.
388
00:20:52,711 --> 00:20:55,748
Unless you go cold turkey,
which we're not.
389
00:20:56,549 --> 00:20:59,152
Few more times
chatting with those nutters,
390
00:20:59,152 --> 00:21:02,788
and you'll be creating
like you never created before.
391
00:21:03,456 --> 00:21:04,490
There you go.
392
00:21:11,330 --> 00:21:12,464
Why you doing this?
393
00:21:13,899 --> 00:21:16,502
Keep telling you, you got talent, kid.
394
00:21:18,771 --> 00:21:20,940
Yeah, but-- What do you want?
395
00:21:22,575 --> 00:21:24,510
A modest 10% as your manager.
396
00:21:25,578 --> 00:21:27,212
We all have to eat, don't we?
397
00:21:30,516 --> 00:21:31,717
Down the hatch.
398
00:21:38,491 --> 00:21:40,493
I ain't say you look like Prince Charles.
399
00:21:40,493 --> 00:21:42,161
- You fuckin' did.
- [bullies laughing]
400
00:21:42,161 --> 00:21:44,130
I said King Charles.
401
00:21:44,130 --> 00:21:47,800
King Charles Spaniel, the dog,
with all the stupid hair and the low IQ.
402
00:21:49,302 --> 00:21:50,836
[JJ winces]
403
00:21:51,904 --> 00:21:53,840
Piss off home, JJ.
404
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:56,276
- What's it to you?
- I need him.
405
00:21:56,276 --> 00:21:57,409
Cheers, Des.
406
00:21:57,977 --> 00:22:03,049
Friends in high places, JJ.
Wanna talk to me? Go through her.
407
00:22:03,049 --> 00:22:05,150
Shut up, Twiglet. Come on.
408
00:22:07,453 --> 00:22:11,958
[choir vocalising]
409
00:22:11,958 --> 00:22:15,929
Oh. Ah, the pink ladies.
410
00:22:15,929 --> 00:22:19,132
And Twiglet, exactly what we need.
A bit of ballast.
411
00:22:19,132 --> 00:22:21,000
I said you'd pay 'em in fags, miss.
412
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:23,736
If they're loud enough,
I'll pay 'em in bloody smack.
413
00:22:23,736 --> 00:22:26,539
Des, get on the keyboard, will you?
I've got my hands full here.
414
00:22:26,539 --> 00:22:29,475
Tina, love.
Do you know where you are on the scale?
415
00:22:29,475 --> 00:22:32,344
Ten stone four, miss. I'm big-boned.
416
00:22:33,980 --> 00:22:36,048
And it's lovely to have you.
417
00:22:36,516 --> 00:22:38,217
Right. Let's go again.
418
00:22:39,385 --> 00:22:40,786
[muttering]
419
00:22:44,156 --> 00:22:45,258
We have to talk, Jean.
420
00:22:45,258 --> 00:22:46,325
[sighs]
421
00:22:47,159 --> 00:22:49,028
Yeah, I know. Um
422
00:22:55,501 --> 00:22:57,903
I don't think, um
423
00:22:59,105 --> 00:23:00,773
We-- We shouldn't.
424
00:23:03,209 --> 00:23:04,243
Okay.
425
00:23:05,544 --> 00:23:07,213
Right.
426
00:23:07,213 --> 00:23:11,050
I mean, we work together,
and, um, it's not right.
427
00:23:11,050 --> 00:23:16,923
- And, uh, anyway, I'm-I'm married, and--
- You are.
428
00:23:16,923 --> 00:23:19,525
- You are. To a lovely man.
- Mmm.
429
00:23:19,525 --> 00:23:22,294
So in that particular respect, no, it's
430
00:23:23,562 --> 00:23:24,763
It's not right.
431
00:23:25,831 --> 00:23:30,703
But in every other respect, it feels
about as right as it's possible to feel.
432
00:23:32,571 --> 00:23:33,772
To me, anyway.
433
00:23:38,477 --> 00:23:40,813
- What about you?
- Don't, Dilip.
434
00:23:42,481 --> 00:23:44,917
- I've a free period tomorrow afternoon.
- No.
435
00:23:46,252 --> 00:23:47,786
Fine.
436
00:23:49,255 --> 00:23:50,456
I'll be there anyway.
437
00:23:50,857 --> 00:23:52,791
- I said no.
- Fine.
438
00:23:54,293 --> 00:23:56,028
[sighs]
439
00:23:57,430 --> 00:23:58,464
Night, Jean.
440
00:24:09,041 --> 00:24:10,075
[Darren groans]
441
00:24:19,352 --> 00:24:22,121
Raindrops keep falling on my head ♪
442
00:24:23,522 --> 00:24:25,825
And just like the man ♪
[vocalises]
443
00:24:25,825 --> 00:24:28,795
Too big for his bed ♪
444
00:24:28,795 --> 00:24:30,930
Nothin' seems to fit ♪
445
00:24:30,930 --> 00:24:34,867
♪ Oh, raindrops keep falling on my head
They-- ♪
446
00:24:34,867 --> 00:24:36,468
["Fuck You" playing in distance]
447
00:24:42,174 --> 00:24:46,079
♪ I see you drivin' 'round town
With the girl I love ♪
448
00:24:46,079 --> 00:24:48,748
And I'm like, "Fuck you" ♪
449
00:24:48,748 --> 00:24:50,416
[vocalises]
450
00:24:50,416 --> 00:24:53,853
♪ I guess the change in my pocket
Wasn't enough ♪
451
00:24:53,853 --> 00:24:57,557
I'm like, "Fuck you and fuck her too" ♪
452
00:24:57,557 --> 00:25:02,428
♪ Said, if I was richer
I'd still be with ya ♪
453
00:25:02,428 --> 00:25:05,398
♪ Ha, now ain't that some shit
Ain't that some shit ♪
454
00:25:05,398 --> 00:25:09,302
♪ Although there's pain in my chest
I still wish you the best ♪
455
00:25:09,302 --> 00:25:11,304
With a "fuck you" ♪
456
00:25:11,304 --> 00:25:14,507
They don't sing songs like this at
the grammar school, I can tell you that.
457
00:25:14,507 --> 00:25:16,475
Haven't you got some toilets to fix?
458
00:25:16,976 --> 00:25:18,945
But that don't mean I can't get ♪
459
00:25:18,945 --> 00:25:22,215
I know modern education
is all effing and jeffing, but really.
460
00:25:22,215 --> 00:25:23,282
Go!
461
00:25:25,217 --> 00:25:27,420
♪ But the way you play your game
Ain't fair ♪
462
00:25:27,420 --> 00:25:29,922
Hetty. Hetty!
463
00:25:29,922 --> 00:25:32,792
♪ I see you driving 'round town
With the girl I love ♪
464
00:25:32,792 --> 00:25:35,728
And I'm like, "Fuck you" ♪
465
00:25:35,728 --> 00:25:37,530
What the hell do you think
you're playing at?
466
00:25:37,530 --> 00:25:39,832
Well, we've no instruments, have we?
467
00:25:39,832 --> 00:25:43,336
Whatever the bastards cut from our budget,
they can't take away our voices, can they?
468
00:25:43,336 --> 00:25:45,038
- Yes, but--
- I had a think.
469
00:25:45,038 --> 00:25:48,107
There's a Fisherman's Choir,
an Army Wives' Choir,
470
00:25:48,107 --> 00:25:49,909
an NHS Choir, a Dementia Choir.
471
00:25:49,909 --> 00:25:52,512
I'm betting there's a choir for people
in bloody choirs.
472
00:25:52,512 --> 00:25:55,080
But there's no Revenge Choir, is there?
473
00:25:55,781 --> 00:25:57,016
Well, there is now.
474
00:25:57,016 --> 00:25:58,351
A what?
475
00:25:58,351 --> 00:26:00,987
- Who really cares about their future?
- [sighs]
476
00:26:00,987 --> 00:26:04,857
What's out there for them?
A job in a call centre? A takeaway shop?
477
00:26:04,857 --> 00:26:07,927
Give 'em 5G, a pizza, and a bag of weed
478
00:26:07,927 --> 00:26:10,462
and tell 'em to shut the fuck up
and be grateful?
479
00:26:10,996 --> 00:26:14,000
The buggers deserve a tiny bit of revenge,
don't you think?
480
00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:16,769
Hetty, you don't even work here anymore.
481
00:26:16,769 --> 00:26:18,404
Louder!
482
00:26:18,404 --> 00:26:21,474
♪ wish you the best
With a "Fuck you" ♪
483
00:26:21,474 --> 00:26:22,909
[vocalises]
484
00:26:22,909 --> 00:26:24,811
I see you drivin' 'round town ♪
485
00:26:24,811 --> 00:26:26,045
Beautiful!
486
00:26:27,780 --> 00:26:29,115
They're swearing, Hetty.
487
00:26:29,115 --> 00:26:31,551
'Course they are. They're angry!
488
00:26:31,551 --> 00:26:34,286
It's like primal screaming with a tune.
489
00:26:34,754 --> 00:26:36,989
No, I don't work here anymore, Jean.
490
00:26:37,857 --> 00:26:39,959
I was fired by my best friend.
491
00:26:40,360 --> 00:26:41,794
I'm a volunteer.
492
00:26:42,295 --> 00:26:46,132
Free music service from a trusted teacher
with 30 years' experience.
493
00:26:46,132 --> 00:26:48,801
Try telling the governors
you've turned that down.
494
00:26:48,801 --> 00:26:53,072
♪ I still wish you the best
With a "Fuck you" ♪
495
00:26:53,072 --> 00:26:58,745
Fuck you ♪
496
00:26:58,745 --> 00:27:00,380
That one's for you, Jeanie.
497
00:27:00,380 --> 00:27:04,216
[students laughing]
498
00:27:05,351 --> 00:27:07,720
- [phone ringing]
- [no audible dialogue]
499
00:27:16,095 --> 00:27:17,530
[Dr Amal] Yeah. Thank you.
500
00:27:17,530 --> 00:27:19,131
All right. Bye, thank you.
501
00:27:21,100 --> 00:27:22,735
How'd it go?
502
00:27:22,735 --> 00:27:24,771
Yeah, good.
I think she's pleased with my progress.
503
00:27:24,771 --> 00:27:28,041
See, the plan's working.
In safe hands with Uncle Gaz.
504
00:27:28,041 --> 00:27:30,042
["Ça plane pour moi" playing]
505
00:27:37,249 --> 00:27:41,287
[no audible dialogue]
506
00:27:43,422 --> 00:27:45,457
[song continues]
507
00:27:56,802 --> 00:27:58,370
[no audible dialogue]
508
00:27:59,105 --> 00:28:00,306
[no audible dialogue]
509
00:28:01,407 --> 00:28:03,343
[song continues]
510
00:28:03,343 --> 00:28:04,743
Never knew my dad.
511
00:28:05,778 --> 00:28:08,013
Six foster homes before the age of ten.
512
00:28:08,547 --> 00:28:09,749
In Norwich.
513
00:28:09,749 --> 00:28:12,852
[song continues]
514
00:28:12,852 --> 00:28:14,753
Whitest place in the universe.
515
00:28:17,890 --> 00:28:20,093
Not easy being
the only Black kid in school.
516
00:28:20,093 --> 00:28:22,128
[music stops]
517
00:28:22,128 --> 00:28:23,195
What?
518
00:28:26,399 --> 00:28:28,968
[song continues]
519
00:28:34,140 --> 00:28:36,776
I'm out!
Halfway house for a month, but I'm out!
520
00:28:36,776 --> 00:28:39,111
- [chuckles]
- I'm out! [laughs]
521
00:28:41,814 --> 00:28:44,283
- [Ant, Gaz whooping]
- [Ben cheering]
522
00:28:45,051 --> 00:28:47,854
[all screaming]
523
00:28:47,854 --> 00:28:49,355
- [song stops]
- [Ant grunts]
524
00:28:50,389 --> 00:28:51,424
[Gaz grunts]
525
00:28:51,424 --> 00:28:54,260
[all laugh]
526
00:28:54,260 --> 00:28:56,262
I'm free!
527
00:28:56,262 --> 00:28:58,498
[dog barking in distance]
528
00:28:58,498 --> 00:29:01,200
[siren wailing in distance]
529
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:02,868
Just a first step this.
530
00:29:03,636 --> 00:29:07,039
Couple of murals in,
putting down a deposit on your own place.
531
00:29:07,607 --> 00:29:10,175
Come on, kid. Get that look off your face.
532
00:29:10,909 --> 00:29:13,146
- [doorbell buzzes]
- You're an artist.
533
00:29:13,146 --> 00:29:17,950
Stick your chest out and repeat after me,
"I've got what it takes. I'm a winner".
534
00:29:19,885 --> 00:29:21,153
Come on. I'm serious.
535
00:29:21,754 --> 00:29:25,925
I've got what it takes.
[stammers] Oh, yeah, I'm-- I'm a winner.
536
00:29:25,925 --> 00:29:27,727
That's it. We're both winners.
537
00:29:27,727 --> 00:29:29,194
- Both winners.
- [door opens]
538
00:29:31,097 --> 00:29:32,898
Welcome to the Recovery House.
539
00:29:33,432 --> 00:29:35,068
[smacks lips] This Anthony?
540
00:29:35,068 --> 00:29:37,337
Ah, no, no. Not me, love. I'm his mate.
541
00:29:37,337 --> 00:29:38,904
All right.
542
00:29:54,487 --> 00:29:57,557
Two microwaves. Two kettles.
Locker for your tins. Sink. Fridge.
543
00:29:57,557 --> 00:29:59,024
House rules are on the board.
544
00:30:01,460 --> 00:30:02,928
Here we are. Room four.
545
00:30:03,396 --> 00:30:06,733
Yellow and green front door.
Blue is the fridge. Pink is your room.
546
00:30:06,733 --> 00:30:08,500
It's £20 every time you lose one.
547
00:30:08,968 --> 00:30:10,302
Bet that keeps you in fags.
548
00:30:11,103 --> 00:30:13,472
This is a strictly no-smoking environment.
549
00:30:16,075 --> 00:30:17,209
Bathroom's at the end.
550
00:30:22,114 --> 00:30:24,516
Thank you. Excuse me.
551
00:30:25,851 --> 00:30:26,885
Thanks.
552
00:30:31,190 --> 00:30:32,291
[door shuts]
553
00:30:32,959 --> 00:30:34,159
[sighs]
554
00:30:35,962 --> 00:30:36,996
Home.
555
00:30:38,097 --> 00:30:39,298
You ever been in prison?
556
00:30:41,867 --> 00:30:43,235
I'll see you later, kid.
557
00:30:43,836 --> 00:30:45,504
Ah. Pills.
558
00:30:47,306 --> 00:30:50,709
I've shaved 5% off 'em already,
so just take your normal dose.
559
00:30:51,444 --> 00:30:54,446
And remember, you are a
560
00:30:55,448 --> 00:30:56,749
Schizophrenic.
561
00:30:57,217 --> 00:30:59,752
- Winner!
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. "Winner".
562
00:31:05,558 --> 00:31:06,759
[chuckles]
563
00:31:08,961 --> 00:31:09,995
See you soon, Gaz.
564
00:31:20,353 --> 00:31:22,556
[Geoff] Apologising's never easy,
565
00:31:22,556 --> 00:31:25,391
but it's amazing what you can change
when you do.
566
00:31:26,126 --> 00:31:27,293
"Sorry".
567
00:31:28,828 --> 00:31:30,297
It's like a magic word.
568
00:31:30,297 --> 00:31:34,034
[scoffs] Never apologise, never explain.
569
00:31:34,034 --> 00:31:35,234
That your motto, is it?
570
00:31:35,635 --> 00:31:37,471
Well, that and no Morris dancing.
571
00:31:37,471 --> 00:31:38,972
[chuckles] Explains a lot.
572
00:31:39,506 --> 00:31:40,506
Meaning?
573
00:31:42,242 --> 00:31:44,111
You're always blaming everyone else.
574
00:31:44,111 --> 00:31:46,480
When things don't work out,
it's never your fault.
575
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:49,883
- Cas.
- Open and honest, Geoff. My motto.
576
00:31:49,883 --> 00:31:51,485
And I bet you love Morris dancing.
577
00:31:51,485 --> 00:31:53,387
I do, as it happens.
578
00:31:53,387 --> 00:31:59,192
Well, all I would say, Gaz,
is that the simple act of apologising,
579
00:31:59,960 --> 00:32:05,031
saying sorry, can sometimes
take a lot of anger out of a situation.
580
00:32:05,932 --> 00:32:06,966
And that way
581
00:32:08,168 --> 00:32:10,503
there's a possibility of moving forward.
582
00:32:13,406 --> 00:32:14,440
Right, Cas?
583
00:32:16,910 --> 00:32:19,479
- Cas.
- All right, I get it.
584
00:32:21,147 --> 00:32:22,215
I'm sorry.
585
00:32:23,149 --> 00:32:24,317
Apology accepted.
586
00:32:27,053 --> 00:32:28,187
You know, Geoff
587
00:32:29,155 --> 00:32:31,491
might be something
in this apology malarkey.
588
00:32:34,027 --> 00:32:36,095
[pills rattling]
589
00:32:43,837 --> 00:32:45,038
[sighs]
590
00:32:45,038 --> 00:32:46,372
I'm a winner.
591
00:32:48,274 --> 00:32:49,709
Yeah, I'm a winner.
592
00:32:51,011 --> 00:32:52,779
[water running]
593
00:32:58,451 --> 00:33:00,153
That's right. You're a winner.
594
00:33:06,493 --> 00:33:08,761
Tallulah has got her second poo face on.
595
00:33:09,596 --> 00:33:10,998
What does that look like?
596
00:33:10,998 --> 00:33:12,131
Not unlike that.
597
00:33:12,832 --> 00:33:14,301
I'm not in the mood.
598
00:33:14,301 --> 00:33:17,037
Hetty's bloody Revenge Choir
was at it again tonight.
599
00:33:17,037 --> 00:33:19,106
I'm trying to have a meeting
with the governors,
600
00:33:19,106 --> 00:33:22,209
and I'm being drowned out
by every ne'er-do-well, shoplifter,
601
00:33:22,209 --> 00:33:26,980
smoker and pregnancy-waiting-to-happen
singing "As Cold as Ice".
602
00:33:26,980 --> 00:33:28,949
Foreigner, good choice.
603
00:33:28,949 --> 00:33:30,250
I didn't find it funny.
604
00:33:30,250 --> 00:33:31,952
Well, you did sack her.
605
00:33:31,952 --> 00:33:33,887
[sighs] Do you think I wanted to?
606
00:33:33,887 --> 00:33:38,191
Do you think it's easy
sacking your best friend? Do you?
607
00:33:38,191 --> 00:33:41,561
You've no idea, Dave. No idea whatsoever.
608
00:33:41,561 --> 00:33:44,297
No, you're right. I'm just the caretaker.
609
00:33:44,798 --> 00:33:46,766
Caretaker and dog walker.
610
00:33:47,500 --> 00:33:49,335
I might join that choir.
611
00:33:55,208 --> 00:33:58,946
Just so you know,
you have anything to do with that choir,
612
00:33:58,946 --> 00:34:01,314
and I'm never speaking to you again.
613
00:34:07,487 --> 00:34:08,988
And that's me told.
614
00:34:11,358 --> 00:34:14,261
[singing "Cold as Ice"]
615
00:34:14,261 --> 00:34:15,395
[humming]
616
00:34:31,811 --> 00:34:33,846
[patrons chattering]
617
00:34:39,119 --> 00:34:42,956
Thanks for coming, Dave.
Appreciate it. I know you got a lot on.
618
00:34:42,956 --> 00:34:45,058
Yeah. Can't stay long.
619
00:34:45,692 --> 00:34:47,894
- You said it were important.
- It is.
620
00:34:52,098 --> 00:34:55,202
[clears throat]
Dave, I'd like to apologise.
621
00:34:55,202 --> 00:34:56,803
Oh?
622
00:34:56,803 --> 00:34:59,105
I've had a long think
about our friendship.
623
00:35:00,206 --> 00:35:02,242
- Right?
- And I've realised something.
624
00:35:03,376 --> 00:35:04,410
Right.
625
00:35:05,945 --> 00:35:07,947
It's not all your fault.
626
00:35:10,417 --> 00:35:11,918
Sorry?
627
00:35:11,918 --> 00:35:14,254
All those years
I had to drag you along with me.
628
00:35:14,722 --> 00:35:18,292
This mithering lump complaining in my ear,
629
00:35:18,292 --> 00:35:21,295
knocking every good idea I've ever had
on the head.
630
00:35:21,295 --> 00:35:24,331
All that
"We can't do this. It's not legal.
631
00:35:24,331 --> 00:35:27,934
What about Jean? What about Nathan?
What about this? What about that?"
632
00:35:27,934 --> 00:35:30,003
I'll admit, I held it against you.
633
00:35:30,637 --> 00:35:32,872
But now you're not holding me back.
I'm flying.
634
00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,309
Me, holding you back?
635
00:35:35,309 --> 00:35:40,346
Yeah. I let you hold me back,
and I'd like to apologise for that.
636
00:35:40,847 --> 00:35:43,049
My responsibility. My bad.
637
00:35:43,583 --> 00:35:48,721
So, to sum it up, I'm sorry.
It's not all your fault.
638
00:35:50,156 --> 00:35:51,191
[clicks tongue]
639
00:35:51,191 --> 00:35:52,325
Cheers.
640
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:56,095
That's your apology?
641
00:35:56,863 --> 00:35:58,097
Yeah.
642
00:35:58,765 --> 00:36:02,202
And now, if you would like to apologise
to me, I'm big enough to accept that,
643
00:36:02,202 --> 00:36:06,873
and we could, uh, "move forward",
as the psychotherapy wonks say.
644
00:36:06,873 --> 00:36:08,075
Hmm.
645
00:36:08,075 --> 00:36:09,142
Peanut?
646
00:36:14,447 --> 00:36:20,920
I am this far away from moving you forward
through that fucking window.
647
00:36:28,028 --> 00:36:30,396
[sheep bleating]
648
00:36:34,167 --> 00:36:39,039
[Jean, Dilip moaning]
649
00:36:39,039 --> 00:36:41,775
[moaning continues]
650
00:36:41,775 --> 00:36:44,177
- [horn honking]
- [both grunting]
651
00:36:45,412 --> 00:36:48,448
[steady honk]
652
00:36:51,084 --> 00:36:52,418
Right here.
653
00:36:55,355 --> 00:36:56,923
[upbeat French music playing]
654
00:37:06,333 --> 00:37:07,734
More black paint.
655
00:37:15,208 --> 00:37:17,243
[music continues]
656
00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:21,514
[zipper zips]
657
00:37:23,917 --> 00:37:26,052
[Dilip grunts, sighs]
658
00:37:27,921 --> 00:37:32,392
I'm smoking. I don't smoke.
I hate smoking. I--
659
00:37:32,392 --> 00:37:34,094
Dilip, we can't keep doing this.
660
00:37:34,094 --> 00:37:35,194
[sighs]
661
00:37:38,131 --> 00:37:39,799
That's what you said last time.
662
00:37:44,037 --> 00:37:45,772
What was it you wanted to tell me?
663
00:37:45,772 --> 00:37:50,444
Oh, uh, you know my mate
who runs the Educational Consultancy?
664
00:37:50,444 --> 00:37:52,512
Well, he's starting up a new office
665
00:37:54,014 --> 00:37:56,483
- in Cornwall.
- Oh, I can see where this is going.
666
00:37:56,483 --> 00:37:59,252
I suppose that's one way of dumping me.
667
00:37:59,252 --> 00:38:00,720
Come with me.
668
00:38:03,056 --> 00:38:04,123
- What?
- Why not?
669
00:38:05,091 --> 00:38:06,994
Eh?
670
00:38:06,994 --> 00:38:10,063
I'm building my own team.
There's a job for you. Of course there is.
671
00:38:10,597 --> 00:38:14,267
Super-duper headmistress extraordinaire.
672
00:38:14,267 --> 00:38:15,902
Dilip, don't be daft.
673
00:38:15,902 --> 00:38:18,972
125 grand a year. House on the beach.
You and me.
674
00:38:18,972 --> 00:38:20,140
But-- But I-I can't.
675
00:38:20,140 --> 00:38:21,874
- I mean--
- Jean, I love you.
676
00:38:30,216 --> 00:38:32,819
[scoffs] Nothing, eh?
677
00:38:50,070 --> 00:38:52,238
[birds chirping]
678
00:38:56,810 --> 00:38:58,545
Oh, my gosh ♪
679
00:38:58,545 --> 00:39:00,314
♪ These dickheads wanna rap
As if they're God ♪
680
00:39:00,314 --> 00:39:02,249
♪ Wasteman
Who the heck is this knob? ♪
681
00:39:02,249 --> 00:39:03,984
♪ Explaining everything
What that does, this does ♪
682
00:39:03,984 --> 00:39:05,185
[humming]
683
00:39:05,185 --> 00:39:06,453
Still ain't man enough ♪
684
00:39:06,453 --> 00:39:08,789
The not so ♪
[vocalises]
685
00:39:08,789 --> 00:39:12,225
The not so ♪
[vocalising]
686
00:39:25,305 --> 00:39:26,439
What was that for?
687
00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:29,809
Pissing Hetty off so much
she had to come find me.
688
00:39:30,977 --> 00:39:32,212
No problem.
689
00:39:32,212 --> 00:39:33,846
Oi, that were my idea.
690
00:39:38,218 --> 00:39:39,986
- [shouts]
- [chuckles]
691
00:39:50,279 --> 00:39:54,216
[police radio chatter]
692
00:39:59,522 --> 00:40:01,223
Oh, shit.
693
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:05,795
- [Ant muttering]
- [officer] Oi! Get back here!
694
00:40:05,795 --> 00:40:10,967
I can't find the righteous.
The righteous people.
695
00:40:10,967 --> 00:40:13,669
[muttering continues] The righteous.
I can't find the righteous.
696
00:40:14,270 --> 00:40:16,139
- I can't-- I can't-- I can't--
- Ant.
697
00:40:16,139 --> 00:40:19,742
- I can't find the righteous. I can't--
- Ant, it's Gaz. Your mate.
698
00:40:20,276 --> 00:40:23,746
Stay away.
Satan resides in this very building.
699
00:40:24,681 --> 00:40:30,186
I must gather an army of the righteous
into the four corners of the world.
700
00:40:30,186 --> 00:40:31,387
I will fly!
701
00:40:31,387 --> 00:40:33,022
I'm all for it, mate. Off you go!
702
00:40:33,022 --> 00:40:35,058
- [panting]
- [wind whistling]
703
00:40:35,058 --> 00:40:39,762
But you're not really equipped for flying,
are you?
704
00:40:41,497 --> 00:40:46,135
Not got the proper gear.
Conditions and all that. It's very windy.
705
00:40:47,303 --> 00:40:52,675
I mean, you jump off here, hit a bit
of turbulence over Peak District,
706
00:40:52,675 --> 00:40:55,945
go down in flames,
one nil to fucking Satan, innit?
707
00:40:55,945 --> 00:40:58,314
How's that going to help
the righteous, eh?
708
00:40:58,314 --> 00:40:59,682
What?
709
00:40:59,682 --> 00:41:03,385
Just saying. I'd wait for tomorrow.
710
00:41:04,787 --> 00:41:05,821
You reckon?
711
00:41:06,989 --> 00:41:08,023
I would.
712
00:41:10,159 --> 00:41:14,063
All right. Okay. Okay.
713
00:41:14,063 --> 00:41:16,999
- [Gaz] Ah.
- [Ant] All right. All right.
714
00:41:18,167 --> 00:41:19,268
All right.
715
00:41:22,038 --> 00:41:23,072
Good lad.
716
00:41:23,072 --> 00:41:25,074
[whimpers]
717
00:41:26,342 --> 00:41:28,278
- Oh, God!
- That's it, son.
718
00:41:28,278 --> 00:41:32,748
All right. All right.
You're all right, son.
719
00:41:39,722 --> 00:41:42,424
[bell tolling]
720
00:41:55,338 --> 00:41:58,274
So, when did Satan poke
his ugly nose in again?
721
00:41:59,442 --> 00:42:01,677
[sighs] When I stopped taking my pills.
722
00:42:02,945 --> 00:42:04,013
What, all of them?
723
00:42:05,514 --> 00:42:06,983
Yeah.
724
00:42:06,983 --> 00:42:08,250
What did you do that for?
725
00:42:09,452 --> 00:42:11,086
Y-You said I was a winner.
726
00:42:12,488 --> 00:42:13,656
You are.
727
00:42:16,058 --> 00:42:18,027
Yeah, but I wanted to be a winner quicker.
728
00:42:21,430 --> 00:42:23,165
Oh, kid.
729
00:42:24,333 --> 00:42:26,302
[sighs]
730
00:42:26,302 --> 00:42:29,205
[police radio chatter]
731
00:42:29,205 --> 00:42:30,273
Just watch yourself on this.
732
00:42:30,273 --> 00:42:34,310
[police radio chatter]
733
00:42:36,479 --> 00:42:38,013
[horns honking]
734
00:43:08,144 --> 00:43:11,447
[French music playing on speakers]
735
00:43:20,856 --> 00:43:22,825
Who has a funeral on a Monday?
736
00:43:24,227 --> 00:43:25,427
Dead people.
737
00:43:25,895 --> 00:43:30,232
I-I can't not go, Den.
It's Uncle Dickie. It's family.
738
00:43:30,933 --> 00:43:32,768
Oh, I'll manage.
739
00:43:34,937 --> 00:43:36,072
Is this all right?
740
00:43:36,072 --> 00:43:37,873
Black washes you out.
741
00:43:38,808 --> 00:43:39,875
Thanks a lot.
742
00:43:41,277 --> 00:43:42,711
[sighs] Come here.
743
00:43:45,448 --> 00:43:48,250
Now, you know what your dandruff's like,
so watch out.
744
00:43:48,718 --> 00:43:52,188
For God's sake don't go dancing
under any UV lights.
745
00:43:52,188 --> 00:43:54,390
It'll be like the Milky Way's landed
on your shoulder.
746
00:43:54,390 --> 00:43:57,827
It's a funeral. And when were
the last time we went dancing, anyway?
747
00:43:57,827 --> 00:44:00,062
With this place to look after?
748
00:44:01,163 --> 00:44:02,898
I'll be back tomorrow night.
749
00:44:11,007 --> 00:44:12,842
Don't write me off just yet, Dennis.
750
00:44:13,776 --> 00:44:14,877
What?
751
00:44:16,479 --> 00:44:17,746
Nothing.
752
00:44:28,958 --> 00:44:30,059
[engine starts]
753
00:44:39,201 --> 00:44:42,404
[footsteps approaching]
754
00:44:45,441 --> 00:44:46,642
Hey.
755
00:44:53,249 --> 00:44:54,984
Never gets old, does it?
756
00:44:58,521 --> 00:45:00,356
[Ant sighs]
757
00:45:03,259 --> 00:45:04,760
Was it just for the money?
758
00:45:05,695 --> 00:45:07,163
The money?
759
00:45:07,163 --> 00:45:10,399
Yeah, the 10%.
Was that why you were being my friend?
760
00:45:14,337 --> 00:45:15,804
You know what?
761
00:45:16,973 --> 00:45:18,974
When I found out who you were,
762
00:45:19,375 --> 00:45:22,979
I went to see an art dealer,
a specialist in graffiti,
763
00:45:22,979 --> 00:45:25,748
to find out how much
your paintings were worth.
764
00:45:25,748 --> 00:45:27,183
A-And?
765
00:45:30,119 --> 00:45:31,153
Not much.
766
00:45:33,122 --> 00:45:35,157
Fickle bunch of bastards, the art world.
767
00:45:36,259 --> 00:45:37,894
[stammers] So, why did you help me?
768
00:45:37,894 --> 00:45:40,262
Because fuck the art world,
I think you're amazing.
769
00:45:42,131 --> 00:45:43,165
Oh, thanks.
770
00:45:44,066 --> 00:45:45,334
I wanted to help.
771
00:45:49,939 --> 00:45:51,774
Just went about it the wrong way.
772
00:45:53,509 --> 00:45:54,910
I do that.
773
00:45:59,315 --> 00:46:03,986
Anyway, this is me saying sorry.
774
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:05,754
Where you going?
775
00:46:06,822 --> 00:46:09,659
Not really flavour of the month
around here anymore, kiddo.
776
00:46:09,659 --> 00:46:10,893
They fired you?
777
00:46:14,697 --> 00:46:16,265
Give us a shout when you're out, eh?
778
00:46:47,330 --> 00:46:49,165
I'm like a six-year-old.
779
00:46:50,399 --> 00:46:51,967
Break everything I touch.
780
00:46:53,502 --> 00:46:58,641
Kids, marriage, friends.
781
00:47:00,509 --> 00:47:02,745
Never took responsibility for any of it.
782
00:47:09,785 --> 00:47:16,258
["La Vie En Rose" playing]
783
00:48:30,233 --> 00:48:32,268
[panting]
784
00:48:53,055 --> 00:48:56,025
[music continues]
785
00:49:04,901 --> 00:49:07,636
[music ends]