1 00:00:00,458 --> 00:00:04,295 [Kite Man] Well, the briefcase appears to be nuke proof. 2 00:00:04,295 --> 00:00:05,672 [Golden Glider] You've got to be kidding me. 3 00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:07,132 I guess we've got to find some other way 4 00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:08,800 to destroy the Anti-Life Equation. 5 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,469 Totally. Or maybe I should keep it. 6 00:00:11,469 --> 00:00:14,514 I mean, that way, it doesn't land in the wrong hands. 7 00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:15,807 Babe, no way. 8 00:00:15,807 --> 00:00:18,643 Bein' Beast Mode taught me I never want a power. 9 00:00:18,643 --> 00:00:20,520 The briefcase seems to respect that. 10 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:23,064 So while it makes you a Murderey Molly, 11 00:00:23,064 --> 00:00:25,734 it just makes me a guy with a briefcase. 12 00:00:25,734 --> 00:00:27,277 Fine. Yes, you're right. 13 00:00:27,277 --> 00:00:29,154 Babe, we probs don't have time for this discush. 14 00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:31,197 I think the nuke exploge tipped our locaysh. 15 00:00:31,197 --> 00:00:33,491 Damn it! Okay, you grab the briefcase. 16 00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:35,952 If it's not here, they'll assume it's destroyed. 17 00:00:35,952 --> 00:00:37,245 It'll buy us some time. 18 00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:42,292 We've got to stay on the move. 19 00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:45,003 And keep the briefcase as far away from you as possible, so... 20 00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:47,005 Whoa! Sweet truck. 21 00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:48,548 Are you thinking what I'm thinking, babe? 22 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:52,135 I mean, you do put the hot in hotwire. 23 00:00:52,135 --> 00:00:53,845 Chuck, we don't need a clever line 24 00:00:53,845 --> 00:00:55,180 every time we do something. 25 00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:57,807 Good point. Hell yeah. 26 00:00:57,807 --> 00:00:59,601 I thought we were gonna steal the pickup. 27 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:02,270 No way, babe. This is perf. 28 00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:03,855 The briefcase is way in the back. 29 00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:05,023 We stay on the move. 30 00:01:05,023 --> 00:01:07,192 and fulfill every kid's dream 31 00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:09,986 of being on the open road hauling chicken. 32 00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:12,405 [horn blaring] 33 00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:19,871 [squawking] 34 00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:34,344 [singer] ♪ Hell yeah! ♪ 35 00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:43,478 Wow, you've gotten really good at mixing drinks, Mals. 36 00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:48,692 The secret... [gulps] ...is love what you do. 37 00:01:54,072 --> 00:02:00,745 [chorus] ♪ Darkseid! It's Darkseid! Darkseid! It's Darksei-- ♪ 38 00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:01,746 They get it. 39 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:09,671 Oh, hey there, Mr. Darkseid! To what do we owe the pleasure? 40 00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:12,549 He always visits me on the anniversary of my parents' death. 41 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:13,758 How sweet. 42 00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:15,301 - He killed them. - Ah. 43 00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:17,554 Trust me, Malice, you dodged a bullet. 44 00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:21,224 Well, nontraditional families are families still. 45 00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,184 You've done well for yourself here, Malice. 46 00:02:23,184 --> 00:02:26,855 Serving drinks to the scum of an already derelict species. 47 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:30,525 Hey, take it easy with the compliments. 48 00:02:30,525 --> 00:02:32,819 However, this place is beneath you. 49 00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:36,156 - Thanks, I guess. - I have excellent news. 50 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,450 It's time for you to serve me. 51 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:40,201 One Lee Trevino coming up. 52 00:02:40,201 --> 00:02:44,497 No. What I'm saying is you will come serve me on Apokolips 53 00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:48,209 and help me enslave the entire universe. 54 00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:51,338 Like, today? 55 00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:54,883 See, Goldilocks, you cannot look at screens all day. 56 00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:57,969 You need fresh air! It makes you strong! 57 00:02:57,969 --> 00:03:02,057 You were strong when you stood up to Mr. Luthor and Ms. Villigan. 58 00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,641 Well, I suppose. 59 00:03:03,641 --> 00:03:07,145 After all, I don't take orders from anyone. 60 00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:08,897 I want a lollipop! 61 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:10,315 Coming right up. 62 00:03:11,399 --> 00:03:14,569 - Here's three. - Ah! Ugh. 63 00:03:14,569 --> 00:03:17,322 That third one will be just right. 64 00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:20,325 And I want to go home and watch a show. 65 00:03:20,325 --> 00:03:23,370 When I was your age, I did not have shows. 66 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:26,414 I was in a pit. I would use my imagination 67 00:03:26,414 --> 00:03:28,792 and invent stories for the rocks. 68 00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:33,129 They and the darkness were my only friends. 69 00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:35,674 Then tell me a story. 70 00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:38,385 - A love story. - [groans] 71 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:41,137 [gasps] With the princess. But not with kissing. 72 00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:43,515 Kissing is too yucky. 73 00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:47,143 Okay, I know a love story that conveniently 74 00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:49,729 has no kissing or eye contact. 75 00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:50,939 Yay! 76 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,691 [grumbles] 77 00:03:52,691 --> 00:03:55,860 Once upon a time, there was a pretty cool guy named Ba... 78 00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:58,363 Um, uh... Bane-jamin. 79 00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:00,699 One day, in the 19 and 80s, 80 00:04:00,699 --> 00:04:04,077 he met the most beautiful princess in the world: 81 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:06,871 Princess Rebecca Chen... 82 00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:08,581 [Golden Glider] Damn it! Do you have cash? 83 00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:11,126 I must have lost my wallet escaping from the resort. 84 00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:13,628 Negativ-io on the cash-io, babe. 85 00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:15,880 I tipped generously at the hotel. 86 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:18,967 The hotel that ratted us out to Villigan's? 87 00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:20,719 Those people live off tips. 88 00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:23,847 Well, we can't use cards or Helen will be able to track us. 89 00:04:23,847 --> 00:04:25,724 I have an idea, babe. 90 00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:28,977 Babe, are you sure 91 00:04:28,977 --> 00:04:30,729 we should just leave it in the truck? 92 00:04:30,729 --> 00:04:32,689 Glider, no one's going in that trailer. 93 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:34,566 Chicken theft is incredibly rare. 94 00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:38,236 Now, watch a master salesman at work. 95 00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:39,529 Greetings, sir. 96 00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:41,239 My lady and I would like a table. 97 00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:46,911 Oh, and by the way, these eggs are definitely not for sale. 98 00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:48,580 - Okay? - Yeah. No. 99 00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:50,582 Just because they're super special, I can't put a price on them. 100 00:04:50,582 --> 00:04:53,543 If I had to, though, I'd say $5 an egg. 101 00:04:53,543 --> 00:04:54,919 Wouldn't take a penny less. 102 00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:57,297 - I'll give you a dime an egg. - And sold. 103 00:05:00,258 --> 00:05:02,135 What a sucker. 104 00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:03,470 [Malice] Well, okay. 105 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:06,931 Yeah, sure, I totally want to. 106 00:05:06,931 --> 00:05:10,060 But I have to give Kite Man and Golden Glider a two weeks' notice 107 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:12,270 and, uh, obviously, they're not here right now, 108 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:16,775 - so I guess-- - They're on the run with that Anti-Life Equation? 109 00:05:16,775 --> 00:05:20,445 Kite Man and Golden Glider have the Anti-Life Equation? 110 00:05:20,445 --> 00:05:23,948 Um, no, no, don't listen to the guy who just shit himself. 111 00:05:23,948 --> 00:05:29,496 Everyone knows Lex Luthor and Helen Villigan 112 00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:32,290 have the Whatever-you-call-it Equation? 113 00:05:32,290 --> 00:05:34,501 ♪ The Anti-Life Equation! ♪ 114 00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:38,588 Right, so you should probably kill them if you need to kill anyone. 115 00:05:38,588 --> 00:05:41,633 You'd never lie to me like your parents did, 116 00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:42,926 would you, Malice? 117 00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:46,262 No way, lying is... out of fashion. 118 00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:49,599 I have sought this information for a thousand generations. 119 00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:52,519 Now, to fulfill my destiny! 120 00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:55,188 Keep the Lee Trevinos cold for my return. 121 00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,858 ♪ Chill the glasses! It really helps! ♪ 122 00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:02,362 Shit, shit, shit! I just lied to my god-daddy! 123 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,863 Not a normal lie either, 124 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,824 a lie about something he's really interested in. 125 00:06:05,824 --> 00:06:09,494 Oh, I wouldn't worry, Mals. He seems reasonable. 126 00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:12,163 He came to celebrate killing my parents. 127 00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:14,290 Shit on a prick! On a stick! 128 00:06:14,290 --> 00:06:15,834 I don't know what the saying is. 129 00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:18,003 I am screwed. 130 00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:20,505 What we definitely can't do is go back to Noonan's. 131 00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:21,756 That's the first place they'll look. 132 00:06:21,756 --> 00:06:23,383 What should we do then? 133 00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:26,136 We should, one, stay away from Noonan's. 134 00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,888 - Two, avoid Noonan's. - That's the same point, babe. 135 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:30,890 I really can't stress it enough, babe. 136 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:34,060 How exactly does one destroy something that can't be nuked? 137 00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:36,980 Easy we wait for a storm. 138 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,149 A brain storm. 139 00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:42,360 Now let's get a look at these chicken thieves. 140 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,030 - [chicken growls] - [screams] 141 00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:50,410 Shoot her! Shoot her! 142 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:53,163 [screams] 143 00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:57,500 [whimpering] 144 00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,002 [creature growls] 145 00:07:00,628 --> 00:07:02,714 Drop it in the ocean, feed it to a starfish, 146 00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:05,800 or awaken a Kaiju like a Mothra or a Godzilla. 147 00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:08,511 I love how creative you are, babe. 148 00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:11,556 I just... I don't know if any of these things really exist. 149 00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:14,142 - Um, babe. - What? 150 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,227 [chicken growling] 151 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,229 - [gasps] - [gasps] 152 00:07:18,229 --> 00:07:20,273 - [people clamoring] - Chuck! I told you! 153 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,776 You were right. And obviously, that's what we should be 154 00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:25,570 - focused on at this moment. - That is not what I mean. 155 00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,616 Oh, cluckin' hell. 156 00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:32,827 See? A clever line feels pretty good sometimes. 157 00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:40,752 The scan's complete. 158 00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,672 There's no sign of the Anti-Life Equation. 159 00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:45,674 Congratulations, Villigan. 160 00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:47,676 Your incompetence led to the destruction 161 00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:50,428 of the only thing that could kill Superman. 162 00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:52,305 My incompetence? 163 00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,891 You had it hidden for months in a dive bar under chicken nuggets. 164 00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:56,434 What were you waiting for? 165 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:59,270 The obvious thing. His birthday. 166 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:03,733 Or am I some kind of rube who kills Superman on a random Tuesday? 167 00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:05,443 ♪ Darkseid! ♪ 168 00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:06,945 Hello, Lord Darkseid. 169 00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:09,781 - How are you? - What a lovely surprise. 170 00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:12,784 Silence! I despise pleasantries. 171 00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:15,412 ♪ He hates small talk! ♪ 172 00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:17,288 Where is the Anti-Life Equation? 173 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:19,124 Well, Lord Darkseid, 174 00:08:19,124 --> 00:08:21,918 unfortunately, there was a giant nuclear explosion. 175 00:08:21,918 --> 00:08:25,463 And the Equation has been destroyed. 176 00:08:25,463 --> 00:08:28,341 [laughs] Idiots. 177 00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:32,303 The Anti-Life Equation cannot be destroyed by a mere nuclear blast. 178 00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:37,142 One thousand nuclear blasts would not even tickle a hair on its ball sack. 179 00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:39,769 ♪ It's actually Pronounced nuclear! ♪ 180 00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:41,146 Oh, shut the fuck up! 181 00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:43,148 Well, if it still exists, we should find it. 182 00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:44,816 There's no we here. 183 00:08:44,816 --> 00:08:46,276 You two are out of your depth. 184 00:08:46,276 --> 00:08:49,571 Time to step aside and let the big dog eat. 185 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:52,907 ♪ Woof! Woof! ♪ 186 00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:56,953 Lord Darkseid, I'll happily bow out of the race for the Anti-Life Equation 187 00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,872 if you agree to one tiny condition. 188 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:01,082 - Which is? - Villigan's Crime will be 189 00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,877 the exclusive delivery service for Apokolips. 190 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:08,506 - Free one-hour shipping? - In perpetuity. It's a win-win. 191 00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:11,843 I like your style, Villigan. Deal. 192 00:09:11,843 --> 00:09:14,346 Luthor, you're awfully quiet. 193 00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:15,638 Anything you care to add? 194 00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:18,266 Only congratulations to you both. 195 00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:20,643 Let me know if I can be of any assistance 196 00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:23,188 in your search, Lord Darkseid. 197 00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:24,856 Good. So we agree. 198 00:09:24,856 --> 00:09:29,027 The Anti-Life Equation is mine, and you two are out. 199 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,989 Well, you rolled over like a horny puppy. 200 00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:35,492 If I hadn't, we'd both be dead. 201 00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:38,495 Once I have the Anti-Life Equation, it won't matter. 202 00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:41,915 I'll be even more powerful than Darkseid. [laughs] 203 00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,833 And exactly how do you plan to find 204 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,670 the Anti-Life Equation before Darkseid does? 205 00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:48,046 I don't need to find it. 206 00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:50,256 I'll have it delivered straight to me. 207 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:53,551 And then he discovered that Princess Rebecca 208 00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:56,471 had been thrown into a deep pit. 209 00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:59,599 Uh... Excuse me. What is that? 210 00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,143 Oh, it's just an applesauce squeezer. 211 00:10:02,143 --> 00:10:03,687 They have those? 212 00:10:03,687 --> 00:10:06,815 Do you have any idea how much time I spend smushing apples, 213 00:10:06,815 --> 00:10:08,775 putting in cinnamon and nutmeg 214 00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,111 just so she'll eat something healthy? 215 00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,822 That would be such a timesaver. 216 00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:17,242 Hey, what happens to Princess Rebecca? 217 00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:18,910 Yeah, I'm riveted. 218 00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:23,832 Ah, yes. Well, next, our brave hero Bane-jamin 219 00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:26,543 rescued Princess Rebecca from the pit. 220 00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:29,838 The same place he spent his childhood in darkness? 221 00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:32,215 Look who's been listening. 222 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,802 - [chicken growling] - [people screaming] 223 00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:44,394 What in the ugly shit fuck-- [screams] 224 00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,478 - Babe! - [groans] 225 00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:48,523 - [groans - [screams]] 226 00:10:48,523 --> 00:10:51,776 [screams and groans] 227 00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:58,450 [groans and grunts] 228 00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:00,452 [grunts and yelps] 229 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,290 [yelps] 230 00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:08,793 [yelps] 231 00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:11,296 I didn't eat the eggs. 232 00:11:11,296 --> 00:11:13,965 I swear. They gave me the wrong order. 233 00:11:17,302 --> 00:11:18,720 [people screaming] 234 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:21,348 Babe, gut feeling, the Anti-Life Equation 235 00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:23,683 has something to do with this giant chicken sitch. 236 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:27,354 We've got to get that briefcase away from the chickens! 237 00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:31,274 There it is. 238 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:35,487 Fuck! 239 00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:38,656 [both] Double fuck! 240 00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:39,824 Jinx! 241 00:11:46,247 --> 00:11:49,000 [roars] 242 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,836 [man on radio] Management says the resort remains open during nuclear cleanup, 243 00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:56,466 with unbeatable room specials and a free continental breakfast. 244 00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:59,427 - Chuck, we have to. - I know. Get the briefcase 245 00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:01,179 - out of the... - [cell phone ringing] 246 00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:03,348 - It's Noonan. - Well, answer it. 247 00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:04,766 Well, okay. 248 00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:06,935 Uh, hey, Noonan. Just a, uh, smidge busy here. 249 00:12:06,935 --> 00:12:08,061 Any chance it can wait? 250 00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,813 I'm gonna put you on speaker. 251 00:12:09,813 --> 00:12:11,898 Kite Man! It's Lex Luthor. 252 00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:14,693 You will bring the Anti-Life Equation to me now, 253 00:12:14,693 --> 00:12:17,195 or your friends will die. 254 00:12:17,195 --> 00:12:19,364 - That piece of shit. - Okay. [stammers] 255 00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:21,032 Just don't hurt them, Lex. 256 00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:23,368 We're on our way. We just need a couple minutes to, uh... 257 00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:25,662 Hey, lovebirds. Don't worry about us. 258 00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:27,205 It's under control. 259 00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:32,544 I'm gonna teach these guys a lesson I learned in WW1. 260 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:34,713 How the fuck old is this guy? 261 00:12:34,713 --> 00:12:36,214 [all grunting] 262 00:12:40,719 --> 00:12:42,220 - [groans] - [grunts] 263 00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:43,638 [grunts] 264 00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,390 [men groaning] 265 00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:46,391 [people clamoring] 266 00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:53,523 [sighs] Feels like it's turning into one of those days, babe. 267 00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:55,108 [chicken clucks] 268 00:12:57,902 --> 00:13:00,238 [people screaming] 269 00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:02,532 [roars] 270 00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:09,914 [cries] 271 00:13:18,006 --> 00:13:19,090 [people screaming] 272 00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:26,431 Glider, shoot a beam at it. 273 00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:28,808 Without the Anti-Life Equation, I can't control my powers. 274 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,352 I'll kill everyone. 275 00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:32,437 Okay, uh, let's put on our thinking caps. 276 00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:34,981 What's the best way to kill a bird? 277 00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:38,276 [phone rings] 278 00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:41,279 - Yeah? - Hey, Mals, uh, we need a quick fave. 279 00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:43,448 But I'm in the middle of a retail therapy session. 280 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:44,491 It's been a day. 281 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,910 Bye! Do you have these in a seven? 282 00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:49,871 Wait, wait. Mals, we're kind of dealing with an itty bitty emergency. 283 00:13:49,871 --> 00:13:53,583 Me, too. Although this is actually a big one. It's a one day sale. 284 00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:57,379 Malice, fuck the sale. We need you and your cat, ASAP. 285 00:13:57,379 --> 00:13:59,339 I'll drop a pin so you can find us. 286 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,216 Well, I need to feed Chessure first. 287 00:14:01,216 --> 00:14:03,301 Don't! We need her hungry. 288 00:14:03,301 --> 00:14:04,302 Fine. 289 00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:07,055 [meows] 290 00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:17,315 So their love was not to be 291 00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:21,444 as Princess Rebecca remained lost in time. 292 00:14:21,444 --> 00:14:22,987 Okay, no more story. 293 00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:24,989 But what about her daughter? 294 00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:26,991 Golden Glider? What about her? 295 00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,619 She was being hunted by the bad guys 296 00:14:29,619 --> 00:14:32,914 because she had the Anti-Life Equation. 297 00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:35,542 Someone will save her, right? 298 00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:37,335 That is still unwritten. 299 00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:41,256 So there's still time for her to get a happy ending? 300 00:14:41,256 --> 00:14:43,591 What? You are not old enough to know... 301 00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:47,512 Oh. Oh. Oh. A happy ending to the story. 302 00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:50,098 Right. Well, maybe one day you'll see. 303 00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:51,766 - [grunts] - Hey, Bane! 304 00:14:51,766 --> 00:14:55,562 Look my head is outside but my body is inside. 305 00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:57,105 [grunts] Going back in. 306 00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:59,524 What is this rumpus? 307 00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,615 I must protect my friends. 308 00:15:12,787 --> 00:15:13,955 [groans] 309 00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:21,046 Okay, Goldi, run upstairs, lock the door, 310 00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:23,798 and don't go anywhere until I get back, okay? 311 00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:26,301 Okay. But I have to go potty. 312 00:15:26,301 --> 00:15:29,262 Do whatever need to do. Just go. 313 00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:32,140 I will. But it's not number one. 314 00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:36,186 Okay, well, here's something to read. 315 00:15:36,895 --> 00:15:37,979 [grunts] 316 00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:52,535 D... Do... Don... 317 00:15:57,457 --> 00:16:02,462 Donut! Yay! A donuts bathroom! [chuckles] 318 00:16:05,048 --> 00:16:08,009 Malice, there's a chicken in there. Make Chessure eat it! 319 00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:09,928 - She's vegan now. - Malice! 320 00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:13,098 Fine. Chessure, yummy birdie. 321 00:16:15,809 --> 00:16:18,269 Oh, thank God. I'm safe. 322 00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:22,232 [growls] 323 00:16:22,232 --> 00:16:25,944 [chicken and Chessure growling] 324 00:16:25,944 --> 00:16:28,697 Oh, by any chance did my god-daddy Darkseid 325 00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:32,450 show up recently asking about any particular universe-destroying device? 326 00:16:32,450 --> 00:16:34,661 - No. Why? - Nothing. Never mind. 327 00:16:36,079 --> 00:16:37,622 [Kite Man] Oh, no! 328 00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:40,250 [roars] 329 00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:44,421 Oh! No! My baby. Here, kitty kitty. 330 00:16:47,465 --> 00:16:49,134 I'm really into you, Summer. 331 00:16:49,134 --> 00:16:50,635 Me too, Trent. 332 00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:52,595 I mean, [chuckles] not me. 333 00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:56,224 That's silly. I mean, I'm also super into yo-- 334 00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:59,644 Honey, I really think we should wait for interest rates to go down bef-- 335 00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:04,733 All right. You've convinced me. I'm going vegan. 336 00:17:10,155 --> 00:17:11,781 [all grunting] 337 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:17,162 [rock music playing] 338 00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:23,543 That thing's older than you. [groans] 339 00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:27,672 And it still gets the job done. Just like me. 340 00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:28,965 [grunts] 341 00:17:28,965 --> 00:17:31,009 Two-on-one, huh? What are you guys, twins? 342 00:17:31,009 --> 00:17:32,969 What are you guys, twins? 343 00:17:32,969 --> 00:17:35,013 Who wants some first? 344 00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:37,223 Hey guys, I was thinking maybe 345 00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:39,184 we should put a pin in this. 346 00:17:39,184 --> 00:17:41,728 It's like we say at the fulfillment center, 347 00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:46,441 "Use your head, and lift with your knees!" 348 00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:49,486 Let me know if you need a receipt for that. 349 00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:51,529 - [whimpers] - [grunts] You motherfucker! 350 00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:53,865 - Where's my fuckin' money? - He owes you money? 351 00:17:53,865 --> 00:17:55,158 Ah. Force of habit. 352 00:17:55,158 --> 00:17:57,410 [all grunting] 353 00:17:58,870 --> 00:18:01,122 Time to end this nonsense. 354 00:18:01,122 --> 00:18:03,667 What the fuck? Where the hell is everybody? 355 00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:05,710 Whoa! 356 00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:11,216 And we tell the Queen of Fables we've gone union. 357 00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,593 [all cheering] 358 00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:18,682 - [all gasp] - Well, well, well. 359 00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:23,895 Looks like I found a little hiccup. 360 00:18:23,895 --> 00:18:26,606 Hansel. I never knew you were a labor organizer. 361 00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:30,860 Well, I am. And we are not coming out to fight 362 00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:33,279 until you agree to our demands! 363 00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:35,740 I mean, you can't disappear for months, 364 00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:39,160 then show up and think we'll do your bidding-- 365 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:42,288 - [gasps] Hansel! - [all gasp] 366 00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:45,417 Now it's Nobody and Gretel. 367 00:18:45,417 --> 00:18:47,127 Anybody else want to start a union? 368 00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:49,796 [all clamoring] 369 00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,632 Good. Because we've got shit to do. 370 00:18:55,552 --> 00:18:57,220 Gettin' blood all over my wingtips, 371 00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,430 you piece of garbage. 372 00:19:00,098 --> 00:19:02,559 [grunts] 373 00:19:02,559 --> 00:19:04,811 And that's how we do it at Noonan's. 374 00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:08,273 - Beers on the house! - [all cheering] 375 00:19:08,273 --> 00:19:10,275 All right. False alarm. 376 00:19:10,275 --> 00:19:12,193 I guess everything was under control. 377 00:19:12,193 --> 00:19:13,611 Shame about Hansel. 378 00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:15,822 Okay. One beer each. Then back in the book. 379 00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:17,282 [all screaming] 380 00:19:17,282 --> 00:19:19,117 Babe, we gotta get this chicken away 381 00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:20,910 from its all-you-can-eat buffet. 382 00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:22,287 On it! 383 00:19:24,289 --> 00:19:25,582 Hold this. 384 00:19:27,167 --> 00:19:29,794 [grunts] Holy moly! 385 00:19:37,927 --> 00:19:39,512 It's hammer time. 386 00:19:40,472 --> 00:19:42,974 Please Kite Man, don't hurt 'em! 387 00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:49,522 [grunts and groans] 388 00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:57,197 [clucking] 389 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,953 Okay. You're welcome for all the help. Bye. 390 00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:06,998 Think that briefcase tastes like chicken? 391 00:20:06,998 --> 00:20:09,334 God, I love you, babe. 392 00:20:09,334 --> 00:20:11,169 [Bane] Hey. Three Bears. 393 00:20:11,169 --> 00:20:12,671 We have a mutual friend. 394 00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:16,966 She just went upstairs to... Oh, my God. 395 00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:21,221 I hope she didn't use the... [stammering] Goldilocks! 396 00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:22,847 - [slurps] - [both gasp] 397 00:20:22,847 --> 00:20:25,350 Goldi?! I'm coming in to make sure 398 00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:28,770 you didn't poop yourself to the 1980s. 399 00:20:28,770 --> 00:20:29,688 [grunts] 400 00:20:32,357 --> 00:20:37,696 I am a terrible babysitter. 401 00:20:37,696 --> 00:20:40,907 Looks like everything's A-okay at the bar. 402 00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:42,242 Look at this. 403 00:20:42,242 --> 00:20:44,035 I know. And this was just one chicken. 404 00:20:44,035 --> 00:20:47,664 Imagine if Darkseid or Lex Luthor got their hands on it. 405 00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:48,915 Well, that's not gonna happen, babe, 406 00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,458 because I'm in this till the end. 407 00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:51,876 So am I, babe. 408 00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,879 You and me, Chuck, no matter what. 409 00:20:58,508 --> 00:21:00,468 [Darkseid] Luthor and Villigan were useless. 410 00:21:00,468 --> 00:21:02,345 We're back to where we started. 411 00:21:02,345 --> 00:21:03,430 [DeSaad] Yes, sire. 412 00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:05,724 It appears Malice was mistaken. 413 00:21:05,724 --> 00:21:07,600 Mistaken or lied? 414 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,227 ♪ Treason! ♪ 415 00:21:09,227 --> 00:21:11,521 But why would Malice lie to me? 416 00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:14,149 Unless... she must know 417 00:21:14,149 --> 00:21:16,526 where the Anti-Life Equation is. 418 00:21:16,526 --> 00:21:19,070 Brilliant, sire. Shall we Boom Tube to Noonan's? 419 00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:20,488 DeSaad, you donkey. 420 00:21:20,488 --> 00:21:23,575 Noonan's is exactly where a moron would hide. 421 00:21:23,575 --> 00:21:27,370 But Malice shares my bloodline, she's a genius. 422 00:21:27,370 --> 00:21:28,913 ♪ So smart! ♪ 423 00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:31,458 We must find a way to track her without her knowing. 424 00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:33,084 ♪ You have the chip ♪ 425 00:21:33,084 --> 00:21:34,544 I don't have any chips. 426 00:21:34,544 --> 00:21:37,088 No, the one in the kitty cat. Remember, sire? 427 00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:40,550 It was an add-on at checkout when you purchased Chessure. 428 00:21:40,550 --> 00:21:44,971 Ah, yes! That pushy clerk. What was his name? 429 00:21:44,971 --> 00:21:46,139 ♪ Brandon ♪ 430 00:21:46,139 --> 00:21:47,932 Right, Brandon. 431 00:21:47,932 --> 00:21:51,144 I'm telling you, these pet stores are dens of thieves. 432 00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:55,106 So may I log you in on the "Track My Demon Pet" app? 433 00:21:55,106 --> 00:21:58,360 Where Chessure is, there you will find Malice. 434 00:21:58,360 --> 00:21:59,819 Excellent. 435 00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:02,197 It's time to get the truth from my goddaughter. 436 00:22:02,197 --> 00:22:06,242 The Anti-Life Equation is so close, I can taste it. 437 00:22:06,242 --> 00:22:09,579 ♪ Yum, yum ♪ 438 00:22:09,579 --> 00:22:12,499 [Darkseid cackles] 439 00:22:12,499 --> 00:22:14,793 [theme music playing] 440 00:22:42,028 --> 00:22:43,780 ♪ Oh, yeah! ♪