1
00:00:00,458 --> 00:00:04,295
[Kite Man] Well, the briefcase
appears to be nuke proof.
2
00:00:04,295 --> 00:00:05,672
[Golden Glider]
You've got to be kidding me.
3
00:00:05,672 --> 00:00:07,132
I guess we've got to find
some other way
4
00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:08,800
to destroy
the Anti-Life Equation.
5
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:11,469
Totally. Or maybe
I should keep it.
6
00:00:11,469 --> 00:00:14,514
I mean, that way,
it doesn't land
in the wrong hands.
7
00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:15,807
Babe, no way.
8
00:00:15,807 --> 00:00:18,643
Bein' Beast Mode taught me
I never want a power.
9
00:00:18,643 --> 00:00:20,520
The briefcase
seems to respect that.
10
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:23,064
So while it makes you
a Murderey Molly,
11
00:00:23,064 --> 00:00:25,734
it just makes me
a guy with a briefcase.
12
00:00:25,734 --> 00:00:27,277
Fine. Yes, you're right.
13
00:00:27,277 --> 00:00:29,154
Babe, we probs don't have time
for this discush.
14
00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:31,197
I think the nuke exploge
tipped our locaysh.
15
00:00:31,197 --> 00:00:33,491
Damn it! Okay,
you grab the briefcase.
16
00:00:33,491 --> 00:00:35,952
If it's not here,
they'll assume it's destroyed.
17
00:00:35,952 --> 00:00:37,245
It'll buy us some time.
18
00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:42,292
We've got to stay on the move.
19
00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:45,003
And keep the briefcase
as far away from you
as possible, so...
20
00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:47,005
Whoa! Sweet truck.
21
00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:48,548
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking, babe?
22
00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:52,135
I mean, you do put the hot
in hotwire.
23
00:00:52,135 --> 00:00:53,845
Chuck, we don't need
a clever line
24
00:00:53,845 --> 00:00:55,180
every time we do something.
25
00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:57,807
Good point. Hell yeah.
26
00:00:57,807 --> 00:00:59,601
I thought we were gonna
steal the pickup.
27
00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:02,270
No way, babe.
This is perf.
28
00:01:02,270 --> 00:01:03,855
The briefcase
is way in the back.
29
00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:05,023
We stay on the move.
30
00:01:05,023 --> 00:01:07,192
and fulfill every kid's dream
31
00:01:07,192 --> 00:01:09,986
of being on the open road
hauling chicken.
32
00:01:09,986 --> 00:01:12,405
[horn blaring]
33
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:19,871
[squawking]
34
00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:34,344
[singer] ♪ Hell yeah! ♪
35
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:43,478
Wow, you've gotten really good
at mixing drinks, Mals.
36
00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:48,692
The secret... [gulps]
...is love what you do.
37
00:01:54,072 --> 00:02:00,745
[chorus] ♪ Darkseid!
It's Darkseid!
Darkseid! It's Darksei-- ♪
38
00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:01,746
They get it.
39
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:09,671
Oh, hey there, Mr. Darkseid!
To what do we owe the pleasure?
40
00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:12,549
He always visits me
on the anniversary
of my parents' death.
41
00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:13,758
How sweet.
42
00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:15,301
- He killed them.
- Ah.
43
00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:17,554
Trust me, Malice,
you dodged a bullet.
44
00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:21,224
Well, nontraditional families
are families still.
45
00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,184
You've done well
for yourself here, Malice.
46
00:02:23,184 --> 00:02:26,855
Serving drinks to the scum
of an already derelict species.
47
00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:30,525
Hey, take it easy
with the compliments.
48
00:02:30,525 --> 00:02:32,819
However,
this place is beneath you.
49
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:36,156
- Thanks, I guess.
- I have excellent news.
50
00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,450
It's time for you to serve me.
51
00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:40,201
One Lee Trevino coming up.
52
00:02:40,201 --> 00:02:44,497
No. What I'm saying is
you will come serve me
on Apokolips
53
00:02:44,497 --> 00:02:48,209
and help me enslave
the entire universe.
54
00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:51,338
Like, today?
55
00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:54,883
See, Goldilocks, you cannot
look at screens all day.
56
00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:57,969
You need fresh air!
It makes you strong!
57
00:02:57,969 --> 00:03:02,057
You were strong
when you stood up
to Mr. Luthor and Ms. Villigan.
58
00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,641
Well, I suppose.
59
00:03:03,641 --> 00:03:07,145
After all, I don't take orders
from anyone.
60
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:08,897
I want a lollipop!
61
00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:10,315
Coming right up.
62
00:03:11,399 --> 00:03:14,569
- Here's three.
- Ah! Ugh.
63
00:03:14,569 --> 00:03:17,322
That third one
will be just right.
64
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:20,325
And I want to go home
and watch a show.
65
00:03:20,325 --> 00:03:23,370
When I was your age,
I did not have shows.
66
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:26,414
I was in a pit.
I would use my imagination
67
00:03:26,414 --> 00:03:28,792
and invent stories
for the rocks.
68
00:03:28,792 --> 00:03:33,129
They and the darkness
were my only friends.
69
00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:35,674
Then tell me a story.
70
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:38,385
- A love story.
- [groans]
71
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:41,137
[gasps] With the princess.
But not with kissing.
72
00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:43,515
Kissing is too yucky.
73
00:03:43,515 --> 00:03:47,143
Okay, I know a love story
that conveniently
74
00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:49,729
has no kissing or eye contact.
75
00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:50,939
Yay!
76
00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,691
[grumbles]
77
00:03:52,691 --> 00:03:55,860
Once upon a time,
there was a pretty cool guy
named Ba...
78
00:03:55,860 --> 00:03:58,363
Um, uh... Bane-jamin.
79
00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:00,699
One day, in the 19 and 80s,
80
00:04:00,699 --> 00:04:04,077
he met the most beautiful
princess in the world:
81
00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:06,871
Princess Rebecca Chen...
82
00:04:06,871 --> 00:04:08,581
[Golden Glider]
Damn it! Do you have cash?
83
00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:11,126
I must have lost my wallet
escaping from the resort.
84
00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:13,628
Negativ-io on the cash-io, babe.
85
00:04:13,628 --> 00:04:15,880
I tipped generously
at the hotel.
86
00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:18,967
The hotel that ratted us
out to Villigan's?
87
00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:20,719
Those people live off tips.
88
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:23,847
Well, we can't use cards
or Helen will be able
to track us.
89
00:04:23,847 --> 00:04:25,724
I have an idea, babe.
90
00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:28,977
Babe, are you sure
91
00:04:28,977 --> 00:04:30,729
we should just leave it
in the truck?
92
00:04:30,729 --> 00:04:32,689
Glider, no one's going
in that trailer.
93
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:34,566
Chicken theft
is incredibly rare.
94
00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:38,236
Now, watch a master salesman
at work.
95
00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:39,529
Greetings, sir.
96
00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:41,239
My lady and I
would like a table.
97
00:04:41,239 --> 00:04:46,911
Oh, and by the way, these eggs
are definitely not for sale.
98
00:04:46,911 --> 00:04:48,580
- Okay?
- Yeah. No.
99
00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:50,582
Just because
they're super special,
I can't put a price on them.
100
00:04:50,582 --> 00:04:53,543
If I had to, though,
I'd say $5 an egg.
101
00:04:53,543 --> 00:04:54,919
Wouldn't take a penny less.
102
00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:57,297
- I'll give you a dime an egg.
- And sold.
103
00:05:00,258 --> 00:05:02,135
What a sucker.
104
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:03,470
[Malice] Well, okay.
105
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:06,931
Yeah, sure, I totally want to.
106
00:05:06,931 --> 00:05:10,060
But I have to give Kite Man
and Golden Glider
a two weeks' notice
107
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:12,270
and, uh, obviously,
they're not here right now,
108
00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:16,775
- so I guess--
- They're on the run
with that Anti-Life Equation?
109
00:05:16,775 --> 00:05:20,445
Kite Man and Golden Glider
have the Anti-Life Equation?
110
00:05:20,445 --> 00:05:23,948
Um, no, no, don't listen
to the guy
who just shit himself.
111
00:05:23,948 --> 00:05:29,496
Everyone knows Lex Luthor
and Helen Villigan
112
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:32,290
have the
Whatever-you-call-it Equation?
113
00:05:32,290 --> 00:05:34,501
♪ The Anti-Life Equation! ♪
114
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:38,588
Right, so you should
probably kill them
if you need to kill anyone.
115
00:05:38,588 --> 00:05:41,633
You'd never lie to me
like your parents did,
116
00:05:41,633 --> 00:05:42,926
would you, Malice?
117
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:46,262
No way, lying is...
out of fashion.
118
00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:49,599
I have sought this information
for a thousand generations.
119
00:05:49,599 --> 00:05:52,519
Now, to fulfill my destiny!
120
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:55,188
Keep the Lee Trevinos
cold for my return.
121
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,858
♪ Chill the glasses!
It really helps! ♪
122
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:02,362
Shit, shit, shit!
I just lied to my god-daddy!
123
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:03,863
Not a normal lie either,
124
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,824
a lie about something
he's really interested in.
125
00:06:05,824 --> 00:06:09,494
Oh, I wouldn't worry, Mals.
He seems reasonable.
126
00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:12,163
He came to celebrate killing
my parents.
127
00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:14,290
Shit on a prick!
On a stick!
128
00:06:14,290 --> 00:06:15,834
I don't know
what the saying is.
129
00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:18,003
I am screwed.
130
00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:20,505
What we definitely can't do
is go back to Noonan's.
131
00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:21,756
That's the first place
they'll look.
132
00:06:21,756 --> 00:06:23,383
What should we do then?
133
00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:26,136
We should, one, stay away
from Noonan's.
134
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:28,888
- Two, avoid Noonan's.
- That's the same point, babe.
135
00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:30,890
I really can't
stress it enough, babe.
136
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:34,060
How exactly
does one destroy something
that can't be nuked?
137
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:36,980
Easy we wait for a storm.
138
00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,149
A brain storm.
139
00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:42,360
Now let's get a look
at these chicken thieves.
140
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,030
- [chicken growls]
- [screams]
141
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:50,410
Shoot her! Shoot her!
142
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:53,163
[screams]
143
00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:57,500
[whimpering]
144
00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,002
[creature growls]
145
00:07:00,628 --> 00:07:02,714
Drop it in the ocean,
feed it to a starfish,
146
00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:05,800
or awaken a Kaiju
like a Mothra or a Godzilla.
147
00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:08,511
I love how creative
you are, babe.
148
00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:11,556
I just... I don't know
if any of these things
really exist.
149
00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:14,142
- Um, babe.
- What?
150
00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,227
[chicken growling]
151
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,229
- [gasps]
- [gasps]
152
00:07:18,229 --> 00:07:20,273
- [people clamoring]
- Chuck! I told you!
153
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,776
You were right.
And obviously,
that's what we should be
154
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:25,570
- focused on at this moment.
- That is not what I mean.
155
00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,616
Oh, cluckin' hell.
156
00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:32,827
See? A clever line
feels pretty good sometimes.
157
00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:40,752
The scan's complete.
158
00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,672
There's no sign
of the Anti-Life Equation.
159
00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:45,674
Congratulations, Villigan.
160
00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:47,676
Your incompetence
led to the destruction
161
00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:50,428
of the only thing
that could kill Superman.
162
00:07:50,428 --> 00:07:52,305
My incompetence?
163
00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:54,891
You had it hidden for months
in a dive bar
under chicken nuggets.
164
00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:56,434
What were you waiting for?
165
00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:59,270
The obvious thing.
His birthday.
166
00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:03,733
Or am I some kind of rube
who kills Superman
on a random Tuesday?
167
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:05,443
♪ Darkseid! ♪
168
00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:06,945
Hello, Lord Darkseid.
169
00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:09,781
- How are you?
- What a lovely surprise.
170
00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:12,784
Silence!
I despise pleasantries.
171
00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:15,412
♪ He hates small talk! ♪
172
00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:17,288
Where is
the Anti-Life Equation?
173
00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:19,124
Well, Lord Darkseid,
174
00:08:19,124 --> 00:08:21,918
unfortunately, there was
a giant nuclear explosion.
175
00:08:21,918 --> 00:08:25,463
And the Equation
has been destroyed.
176
00:08:25,463 --> 00:08:28,341
[laughs] Idiots.
177
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:32,303
The Anti-Life Equation
cannot be destroyed
by a mere nuclear blast.
178
00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:37,142
One thousand nuclear blasts
would not even tickle
a hair on its ball sack.
179
00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:39,769
♪ It's actually
Pronounced nuclear! ♪
180
00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:41,146
Oh, shut the fuck up!
181
00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:43,148
Well, if it still exists,
we should find it.
182
00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:44,816
There's no we here.
183
00:08:44,816 --> 00:08:46,276
You two are out of your depth.
184
00:08:46,276 --> 00:08:49,571
Time to step aside
and let the big dog eat.
185
00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:52,907
♪ Woof! Woof! ♪
186
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:56,953
Lord Darkseid, I'll happily
bow out of the race
for the Anti-Life Equation
187
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,872
if you agree
to one tiny condition.
188
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:01,082
- Which is?
- Villigan's Crime will be
189
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,877
the exclusive delivery service
for Apokolips.
190
00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:08,506
- Free one-hour shipping?
- In perpetuity. It's a win-win.
191
00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:11,843
I like your style,
Villigan. Deal.
192
00:09:11,843 --> 00:09:14,346
Luthor, you're awfully quiet.
193
00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:15,638
Anything you care to add?
194
00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:18,266
Only congratulations
to you both.
195
00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:20,643
Let me know if I can be
of any assistance
196
00:09:20,643 --> 00:09:23,188
in your search, Lord Darkseid.
197
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:24,856
Good. So we agree.
198
00:09:24,856 --> 00:09:29,027
The Anti-Life Equation is mine,
and you two are out.
199
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,989
Well, you rolled over
like a horny puppy.
200
00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:35,492
If I hadn't, we'd both be dead.
201
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:38,495
Once I have
the Anti-Life Equation,
it won't matter.
202
00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:41,915
I'll be even more powerful
than Darkseid. [laughs]
203
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,833
And exactly how do you
plan to find
204
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,670
the Anti-Life Equation
before Darkseid does?
205
00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:48,046
I don't need to find it.
206
00:09:48,046 --> 00:09:50,256
I'll have it delivered
straight to me.
207
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:53,551
And then he discovered
that Princess Rebecca
208
00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:56,471
had been thrown
into a deep pit.
209
00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:59,599
Uh... Excuse me.
What is that?
210
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,143
Oh, it's just
an applesauce squeezer.
211
00:10:02,143 --> 00:10:03,687
They have those?
212
00:10:03,687 --> 00:10:06,815
Do you have any idea
how much time
I spend smushing apples,
213
00:10:06,815 --> 00:10:08,775
putting in cinnamon and nutmeg
214
00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,111
just so she'll eat
something healthy?
215
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:13,822
That would be such a timesaver.
216
00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:17,242
Hey, what happens
to Princess Rebecca?
217
00:10:17,242 --> 00:10:18,910
Yeah, I'm riveted.
218
00:10:18,910 --> 00:10:23,832
Ah, yes. Well, next,
our brave hero Bane-jamin
219
00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:26,543
rescued Princess Rebecca
from the pit.
220
00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:29,838
The same place he spent
his childhood in darkness?
221
00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:32,215
Look who's been listening.
222
00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,802
- [chicken growling]
- [people screaming]
223
00:10:42,100 --> 00:10:44,394
What in the ugly shit fuck--
[screams]
224
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:45,478
- Babe!
- [groans]
225
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:48,523
- [groans
- [screams]]
226
00:10:48,523 --> 00:10:51,776
[screams and groans]
227
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:58,450
[groans and grunts]
228
00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:00,452
[grunts and yelps]
229
00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:05,290
[yelps]
230
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:08,793
[yelps]
231
00:11:10,086 --> 00:11:11,296
I didn't eat the eggs.
232
00:11:11,296 --> 00:11:13,965
I swear. They gave me
the wrong order.
233
00:11:17,302 --> 00:11:18,720
[people screaming]
234
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:21,348
Babe, gut feeling,
the Anti-Life Equation
235
00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:23,683
has something to do
with this giant chicken sitch.
236
00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:27,354
We've got to get that briefcase
away from the chickens!
237
00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:31,274
There it is.
238
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:35,487
Fuck!
239
00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:38,656
[both] Double fuck!
240
00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:39,824
Jinx!
241
00:11:46,247 --> 00:11:49,000
[roars]
242
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,836
[man on radio] Management says
the resort remains open
during nuclear cleanup,
243
00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:56,466
with unbeatable room
specials and a free
continental breakfast.
244
00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:59,427
- Chuck, we have to.
- I know. Get the briefcase
245
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:01,179
- out of the...
- [cell phone ringing]
246
00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:03,348
- It's Noonan.
- Well, answer it.
247
00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:04,766
Well, okay.
248
00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:06,935
Uh, hey, Noonan.
Just a, uh, smidge busy here.
249
00:12:06,935 --> 00:12:08,061
Any chance it can wait?
250
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,813
I'm gonna put you on speaker.
251
00:12:09,813 --> 00:12:11,898
Kite Man! It's Lex Luthor.
252
00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:14,693
You will bring the Anti-Life
Equation to me now,
253
00:12:14,693 --> 00:12:17,195
or your friends will die.
254
00:12:17,195 --> 00:12:19,364
- That piece of shit.
- Okay. [stammers]
255
00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:21,032
Just don't hurt them, Lex.
256
00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:23,368
We're on our way. We just need
a couple minutes to, uh...
257
00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:25,662
Hey, lovebirds.
Don't worry about us.
258
00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:27,205
It's under control.
259
00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:32,544
I'm gonna teach these guys
a lesson I learned in WW1.
260
00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:34,713
How the fuck old is this guy?
261
00:12:34,713 --> 00:12:36,214
[all grunting]
262
00:12:40,719 --> 00:12:42,220
- [groans]
- [grunts]
263
00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:43,638
[grunts]
264
00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,390
[men groaning]
265
00:12:45,390 --> 00:12:46,391
[people clamoring]
266
00:12:49,477 --> 00:12:53,523
[sighs] Feels like it's turning
into one of those days, babe.
267
00:12:53,523 --> 00:12:55,108
[chicken clucks]
268
00:12:57,902 --> 00:13:00,238
[people screaming]
269
00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:02,532
[roars]
270
00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:09,914
[cries]
271
00:13:18,006 --> 00:13:19,090
[people screaming]
272
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:26,431
Glider, shoot a beam at it.
273
00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:28,808
Without the Anti-Life Equation,
I can't control my powers.
274
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:30,352
I'll kill everyone.
275
00:13:30,352 --> 00:13:32,437
Okay, uh, let's put on
our thinking caps.
276
00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:34,981
What's the best way
to kill a bird?
277
00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:38,276
[phone rings]
278
00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:41,279
- Yeah?
- Hey, Mals, uh,
we need a quick fave.
279
00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:43,448
But I'm in the middle
of a retail therapy session.
280
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:44,491
It's been a day.
281
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,910
Bye! Do you have these
in a seven?
282
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:49,871
Wait, wait. Mals,
we're kind of dealing
with an itty bitty emergency.
283
00:13:49,871 --> 00:13:53,583
Me, too. Although this is
actually a big one.
It's a one day sale.
284
00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:57,379
Malice, fuck the sale.
We need you and your cat, ASAP.
285
00:13:57,379 --> 00:13:59,339
I'll drop a pin
so you can find us.
286
00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,216
Well, I need to feed
Chessure first.
287
00:14:01,216 --> 00:14:03,301
Don't! We need her hungry.
288
00:14:03,301 --> 00:14:04,302
Fine.
289
00:14:05,929 --> 00:14:07,055
[meows]
290
00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:17,315
So their love was not to be
291
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:21,444
as Princess Rebecca
remained lost in time.
292
00:14:21,444 --> 00:14:22,987
Okay, no more story.
293
00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:24,989
But what about her daughter?
294
00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:26,991
Golden Glider? What about her?
295
00:14:26,991 --> 00:14:29,619
She was being hunted
by the bad guys
296
00:14:29,619 --> 00:14:32,914
because she had
the Anti-Life Equation.
297
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:35,542
Someone will save her, right?
298
00:14:35,542 --> 00:14:37,335
That is still unwritten.
299
00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:41,256
So there's still time for her
to get a happy ending?
300
00:14:41,256 --> 00:14:43,591
What? You are not old enough
to know...
301
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:47,512
Oh. Oh. Oh.
A happy ending to the story.
302
00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:50,098
Right. Well, maybe
one day you'll see.
303
00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:51,766
- [grunts]
- Hey, Bane!
304
00:14:51,766 --> 00:14:55,562
Look my head is outside
but my body is inside.
305
00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:57,105
[grunts] Going back in.
306
00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:59,524
What is this rumpus?
307
00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,615
I must protect my friends.
308
00:15:12,787 --> 00:15:13,955
[groans]
309
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:21,046
Okay, Goldi, run upstairs,
lock the door,
310
00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:23,798
and don't go anywhere
until I get back, okay?
311
00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:26,301
Okay. But I have to go potty.
312
00:15:26,301 --> 00:15:29,262
Do whatever need to do.
Just go.
313
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:32,140
I will.
But it's not number one.
314
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:36,186
Okay, well,
here's something to read.
315
00:15:36,895 --> 00:15:37,979
[grunts]
316
00:15:49,532 --> 00:15:52,535
D... Do... Don...
317
00:15:57,457 --> 00:16:02,462
Donut! Yay!
A donuts bathroom!
[chuckles]
318
00:16:05,048 --> 00:16:08,009
Malice, there's
a chicken in there.
Make Chessure eat it!
319
00:16:08,009 --> 00:16:09,928
- She's vegan now.
- Malice!
320
00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:13,098
Fine. Chessure, yummy birdie.
321
00:16:15,809 --> 00:16:18,269
Oh, thank God. I'm safe.
322
00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:22,232
[growls]
323
00:16:22,232 --> 00:16:25,944
[chicken and Chessure growling]
324
00:16:25,944 --> 00:16:28,697
Oh, by any chance
did my god-daddy Darkseid
325
00:16:28,697 --> 00:16:32,450
show up recently
asking about any particular
universe-destroying device?
326
00:16:32,450 --> 00:16:34,661
- No. Why?
- Nothing. Never mind.
327
00:16:36,079 --> 00:16:37,622
[Kite Man] Oh, no!
328
00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:40,250
[roars]
329
00:16:40,250 --> 00:16:44,421
Oh! No! My baby.
Here, kitty kitty.
330
00:16:47,465 --> 00:16:49,134
I'm really into you, Summer.
331
00:16:49,134 --> 00:16:50,635
Me too, Trent.
332
00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:52,595
I mean, [chuckles] not me.
333
00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:56,224
That's silly. I mean,
I'm also super into yo--
334
00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:59,644
Honey, I really think
we should wait for
interest rates to go down bef--
335
00:17:01,271 --> 00:17:04,733
All right. You've convinced me.
I'm going vegan.
336
00:17:10,155 --> 00:17:11,781
[all grunting]
337
00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:17,162
[rock music playing]
338
00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:23,543
That thing's older than you.
[groans]
339
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:27,672
And it still gets the job done.
Just like me.
340
00:17:27,672 --> 00:17:28,965
[grunts]
341
00:17:28,965 --> 00:17:31,009
Two-on-one, huh?
What are you guys, twins?
342
00:17:31,009 --> 00:17:32,969
What are you guys, twins?
343
00:17:32,969 --> 00:17:35,013
Who wants some first?
344
00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:37,223
Hey guys,
I was thinking maybe
345
00:17:37,223 --> 00:17:39,184
we should put a pin in this.
346
00:17:39,184 --> 00:17:41,728
It's like we say
at the fulfillment center,
347
00:17:41,728 --> 00:17:46,441
"Use your head,
and lift with your knees!"
348
00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:49,486
Let me know if you need
a receipt for that.
349
00:17:49,486 --> 00:17:51,529
- [whimpers]
- [grunts] You motherfucker!
350
00:17:51,529 --> 00:17:53,865
- Where's my fuckin' money?
- He owes you money?
351
00:17:53,865 --> 00:17:55,158
Ah. Force of habit.
352
00:17:55,158 --> 00:17:57,410
[all grunting]
353
00:17:58,870 --> 00:18:01,122
Time to end this nonsense.
354
00:18:01,122 --> 00:18:03,667
What the fuck?
Where the hell is everybody?
355
00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:05,710
Whoa!
356
00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:11,216
And we tell the Queen of Fables
we've gone union.
357
00:18:11,216 --> 00:18:13,593
[all cheering]
358
00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:18,682
- [all gasp]
- Well, well, well.
359
00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:23,895
Looks like I found
a little hiccup.
360
00:18:23,895 --> 00:18:26,606
Hansel. I never knew
you were a labor organizer.
361
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:30,860
Well, I am.
And we are not
coming out to fight
362
00:18:30,860 --> 00:18:33,279
until you agree to our demands!
363
00:18:33,279 --> 00:18:35,740
I mean, you can't disappear
for months,
364
00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:39,160
then show up and think
we'll do your bidding--
365
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:42,288
- [gasps] Hansel!
- [all gasp]
366
00:18:43,998 --> 00:18:45,417
Now it's Nobody and Gretel.
367
00:18:45,417 --> 00:18:47,127
Anybody else
want to start a union?
368
00:18:47,127 --> 00:18:49,796
[all clamoring]
369
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,632
Good.
Because we've got shit to do.
370
00:18:55,552 --> 00:18:57,220
Gettin' blood
all over my wingtips,
371
00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,430
you piece of garbage.
372
00:19:00,098 --> 00:19:02,559
[grunts]
373
00:19:02,559 --> 00:19:04,811
And that's how we do it
at Noonan's.
374
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:08,273
- Beers on the house!
- [all cheering]
375
00:19:08,273 --> 00:19:10,275
All right. False alarm.
376
00:19:10,275 --> 00:19:12,193
I guess
everything was under control.
377
00:19:12,193 --> 00:19:13,611
Shame about Hansel.
378
00:19:13,611 --> 00:19:15,822
Okay. One beer each.
Then back in the book.
379
00:19:15,822 --> 00:19:17,282
[all screaming]
380
00:19:17,282 --> 00:19:19,117
Babe, we gotta get
this chicken away
381
00:19:19,117 --> 00:19:20,910
from its
all-you-can-eat buffet.
382
00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:22,287
On it!
383
00:19:24,289 --> 00:19:25,582
Hold this.
384
00:19:27,167 --> 00:19:29,794
[grunts] Holy moly!
385
00:19:37,927 --> 00:19:39,512
It's hammer time.
386
00:19:40,472 --> 00:19:42,974
Please Kite Man,
don't hurt 'em!
387
00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:49,522
[grunts and groans]
388
00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:57,197
[clucking]
389
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,953
Okay. You're welcome
for all the help. Bye.
390
00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:06,998
Think that briefcase
tastes like chicken?
391
00:20:06,998 --> 00:20:09,334
God, I love you, babe.
392
00:20:09,334 --> 00:20:11,169
[Bane] Hey. Three Bears.
393
00:20:11,169 --> 00:20:12,671
We have a mutual friend.
394
00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:16,966
She just went upstairs to...
Oh, my God.
395
00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:21,221
I hope she didn't use the...
[stammering] Goldilocks!
396
00:20:21,221 --> 00:20:22,847
- [slurps]
- [both gasp]
397
00:20:22,847 --> 00:20:25,350
Goldi?! I'm coming in
to make sure
398
00:20:25,350 --> 00:20:28,770
you didn't poop yourself
to the 1980s.
399
00:20:28,770 --> 00:20:29,688
[grunts]
400
00:20:32,357 --> 00:20:37,696
I am a terrible babysitter.
401
00:20:37,696 --> 00:20:40,907
Looks like everything's A-okay
at the bar.
402
00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:42,242
Look at this.
403
00:20:42,242 --> 00:20:44,035
I know.
And this was just one chicken.
404
00:20:44,035 --> 00:20:47,664
Imagine if Darkseid
or Lex Luthor
got their hands on it.
405
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:48,915
Well, that's not gonna
happen, babe,
406
00:20:48,915 --> 00:20:50,458
because I'm in this
till the end.
407
00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:51,876
So am I, babe.
408
00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,879
You and me, Chuck,
no matter what.
409
00:20:58,508 --> 00:21:00,468
[Darkseid] Luthor and Villigan
were useless.
410
00:21:00,468 --> 00:21:02,345
We're back to where we started.
411
00:21:02,345 --> 00:21:03,430
[DeSaad] Yes, sire.
412
00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:05,724
It appears Malice was mistaken.
413
00:21:05,724 --> 00:21:07,600
Mistaken or lied?
414
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,227
♪ Treason! ♪
415
00:21:09,227 --> 00:21:11,521
But why would Malice lie to me?
416
00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:14,149
Unless... she must know
417
00:21:14,149 --> 00:21:16,526
where the Anti-Life
Equation is.
418
00:21:16,526 --> 00:21:19,070
Brilliant, sire.
Shall we Boom Tube to Noonan's?
419
00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:20,488
DeSaad, you donkey.
420
00:21:20,488 --> 00:21:23,575
Noonan's is exactly
where a moron would hide.
421
00:21:23,575 --> 00:21:27,370
But Malice shares my bloodline,
she's a genius.
422
00:21:27,370 --> 00:21:28,913
♪ So smart! ♪
423
00:21:28,913 --> 00:21:31,458
We must find a way to track her
without her knowing.
424
00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:33,084
♪ You have the chip ♪
425
00:21:33,084 --> 00:21:34,544
I don't have any chips.
426
00:21:34,544 --> 00:21:37,088
No, the one in the kitty cat.
Remember, sire?
427
00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:40,550
It was an add-on at checkout
when you purchased Chessure.
428
00:21:40,550 --> 00:21:44,971
Ah, yes! That pushy clerk.
What was his name?
429
00:21:44,971 --> 00:21:46,139
♪ Brandon ♪
430
00:21:46,139 --> 00:21:47,932
Right, Brandon.
431
00:21:47,932 --> 00:21:51,144
I'm telling you,
these pet stores
are dens of thieves.
432
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:55,106
So may I log you in on
the "Track My Demon Pet" app?
433
00:21:55,106 --> 00:21:58,360
Where Chessure is,
there you will find Malice.
434
00:21:58,360 --> 00:21:59,819
Excellent.
435
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:02,197
It's time to get the truth
from my goddaughter.
436
00:22:02,197 --> 00:22:06,242
The Anti-Life Equation
is so close, I can taste it.
437
00:22:06,242 --> 00:22:09,579
♪ Yum, yum ♪
438
00:22:09,579 --> 00:22:12,499
[Darkseid cackles]
439
00:22:12,499 --> 00:22:14,793
[theme music playing]
440
00:22:42,028 --> 00:22:43,780
♪ Oh, yeah! ♪