1
00:00:20,354 --> 00:00:23,483
[dramatic music]
2
00:00:35,161 --> 00:00:39,415
[yawning]
3
00:00:39,415 --> 00:00:41,250
Reason for visiting?
4
00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:43,628
[clears throat]
Work.
5
00:00:43,628 --> 00:00:45,838
Can you please take off
your sunglasses?
6
00:00:45,838 --> 00:00:47,548
Oh, yeah. Sorry.
7
00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:49,801
How long will you be staying?
8
00:00:49,801 --> 00:00:51,010
I don't know.
9
00:00:51,010 --> 00:00:52,178
Where are you staying?
10
00:00:52,178 --> 00:00:54,138
No idea.
11
00:00:54,138 --> 00:00:56,432
Any drugs, alcohol,
or merchandise
12
00:00:56,432 --> 00:00:58,768
of $10,000 in value?
13
00:01:00,144 --> 00:01:01,854
No.
14
00:01:04,399 --> 00:01:07,318
[muffled Christmas music]
15
00:01:07,318 --> 00:01:14,492
♪ ♪
16
00:01:27,422 --> 00:01:29,966
Hey,
how's the air-conditioning?
17
00:01:29,966 --> 00:01:31,592
It's great, thank you.
18
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,553
Would you like any music?
19
00:01:33,553 --> 00:01:36,347
Oh, no. I'm cool.
I'm going to use my headphones.
20
00:01:36,347 --> 00:01:39,559
You can hook up your, uh,
Bluetooth to my speaker.
21
00:01:39,559 --> 00:01:41,060
Uh, it's all good, thanks.
22
00:01:41,060 --> 00:01:43,813
* I wanna double park
on that booty, baby ♪
23
00:01:43,813 --> 00:01:46,858
I gotta tell you,
we have never had a celebrity
24
00:01:46,858 --> 00:01:48,735
this big in the car before.
25
00:01:48,735 --> 00:01:51,571
[muffled speech]
26
00:01:51,571 --> 00:01:54,031
* What you mean
I can't touch it? ♪
27
00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:55,742
[thumping electronic music]
28
00:01:55,742 --> 00:01:59,287
♪ I wanna double park
on that booty, baby ♪
29
00:02:18,681 --> 00:02:22,518
[announcers speaking French]
30
00:02:36,282 --> 00:02:38,451
[sighs]
31
00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:02,558
[groans]
32
00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:07,230
[spray can hisses]
33
00:03:07,230 --> 00:03:10,274
I can't believe we have
to do this during Christmas.
34
00:03:10,274 --> 00:03:11,734
This is so fucked up.
35
00:03:11,734 --> 00:03:13,694
I mean, the whole thing,
but this too.
36
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:15,238
Yeah.
37
00:03:15,238 --> 00:03:17,198
My family's celebrating without
me, but that's every year.
38
00:03:17,198 --> 00:03:19,117
[sighs]
Yeah.
39
00:03:19,117 --> 00:03:21,661
To think what he was doing
in that trailer under all
40
00:03:21,661 --> 00:03:23,246
our noses, just lying--
41
00:03:23,246 --> 00:03:24,330
[Ilkay Sencan's "DO IT"]
42
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:26,332
♪ Lick, lick, lick it now ♪
43
00:03:26,332 --> 00:03:28,459
- * Do, do, do it ♪
- [coughs]
44
00:03:28,459 --> 00:03:30,962
♪ Lick, lick, lick it now ♪
45
00:03:30,962 --> 00:03:33,172
♪ Do, do, do it ♪
46
00:03:33,172 --> 00:03:35,383
♪ Lick, lick, lick it now ♪
47
00:03:35,383 --> 00:03:37,468
♪ Do, do, do it ♪
48
00:03:37,468 --> 00:03:40,054
♪ Lick, lick, lick it now ♪
49
00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:41,097
[muffled]
Pete?
50
00:03:41,097 --> 00:03:42,098
Oh, fuck.
51
00:03:42,098 --> 00:03:43,099
Fuck!
52
00:03:43,099 --> 00:03:44,642
Don't do that sh...
53
00:03:44,642 --> 00:03:46,269
- Sorry.
- That's OK.
54
00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:47,270
- Sorry.
- Hi.
55
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:48,563
- Pete.
- Oh, yeah.
56
00:03:48,563 --> 00:03:49,564
Hi, I'm Monica.
57
00:03:49,564 --> 00:03:51,023
I'm the second AD.
58
00:03:51,023 --> 00:03:53,276
I'll be your liaison
for the rest of the shoot.
59
00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:55,570
"I'm sorry in advance."
[chuckles]
60
00:03:55,570 --> 00:03:56,779
That's Rodney Dangerfield.
61
00:03:56,779 --> 00:03:58,281
Do it all the time.
Nice to meet you.
62
00:03:58,281 --> 00:03:59,866
Uh--
63
00:03:59,866 --> 00:04:01,367
* Shake your body,
don't stop, don't miss ♪
64
00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:03,327
♪ All you ladies pop
your pussy like this ♪
65
00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:05,288
♪ Shake your body,
don't stop, don't miss ♪
66
00:04:05,288 --> 00:04:06,622
♪ Just do it ♪
67
00:04:06,622 --> 00:04:09,459
♪ Do it, do it, do it, do it ♪
68
00:04:09,459 --> 00:04:11,127
{\an8}Hey, all done?
69
00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:12,670
{\an8}Yeah.
70
00:04:12,670 --> 00:04:14,422
{\an8}So everything's closed
for the holidays right now,
71
00:04:14,422 --> 00:04:16,966
{\an8}and crafty's pretty much
all frozen pizza and gum.
72
00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:19,010
{\an8}But if you want
slightly better pizza,
73
00:04:19,010 --> 00:04:21,012
{\an8}there's a bowling alley nearby,
so I could--
74
00:04:21,012 --> 00:04:22,555
{\an8}Cool.
75
00:04:22,555 --> 00:04:23,681
{\an8}I just--I can't wait to
do a scene with Brad Pitt.
76
00:04:23,681 --> 00:04:25,516
{\an8}- Oh, totally.
- Yeah.
77
00:04:25,516 --> 00:04:26,726
We got you
a whole new trailer.
78
00:04:26,726 --> 00:04:28,019
It's from
a different production.
79
00:04:28,019 --> 00:04:30,688
I'll grab you when there's,
um--so--soon.
80
00:04:30,688 --> 00:04:32,315
- OK. All right.
- Yeah. A little bit.
81
00:04:32,315 --> 00:04:33,775
Yeah. Relax.
82
00:04:35,777 --> 00:04:37,487
OK.
83
00:04:39,781 --> 00:04:41,074
[sighs]
84
00:04:52,794 --> 00:04:55,671
I got to see--
[phone ringing]
85
00:04:55,671 --> 00:04:57,215
- Hello?
- Hey, Poppy.
86
00:04:57,215 --> 00:04:58,508
How you doing?
87
00:04:58,508 --> 00:04:59,926
Sorry if I'm calling
early or late.
88
00:04:59,926 --> 00:05:01,511
I don't know
what time zone I'm on.
89
00:05:01,511 --> 00:05:03,179
Hey, there's my grandson.
90
00:05:03,179 --> 00:05:04,764
What's going on?
91
00:05:04,764 --> 00:05:06,432
You caught me in the middle
of a card game with the guys.
92
00:05:06,432 --> 00:05:07,475
Say hi to everybody. Here.
93
00:05:07,475 --> 00:05:08,643
Hello, Peter.
94
00:05:08,643 --> 00:05:09,977
Thank God you're calling.
95
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:11,729
I think your Poppy
needs a loan.
96
00:05:11,729 --> 00:05:13,731
- Where are you?
- I'm in the hospital.
97
00:05:13,731 --> 00:05:15,191
Fucking chemo takes forever,
98
00:05:15,191 --> 00:05:17,318
so I thought I'd make
a few dollars while I'm here.
99
00:05:17,318 --> 00:05:18,486
So I'm playing cards.
100
00:05:18,486 --> 00:05:19,779
That's--that's good.
101
00:05:19,779 --> 00:05:21,114
It's good
you're doing the chemo.
102
00:05:21,114 --> 00:05:22,865
Yeah, well,
I'm glad you think so.
103
00:05:22,865 --> 00:05:25,159
According to the Internet,
I'm fucked.
104
00:05:25,159 --> 00:05:28,704
And, uh, nobody here
is letting me win anything.
105
00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:29,872
I respect you
too much for that.
106
00:05:29,872 --> 00:05:31,124
Yeah, sure.
107
00:05:31,124 --> 00:05:32,208
Well, I'm shooting
this Vietnam movie.
108
00:05:32,208 --> 00:05:33,501
It's pretty cool.
109
00:05:33,501 --> 00:05:35,169
I'm replacing this actor,
because he, like,
110
00:05:35,169 --> 00:05:37,463
fucked up or something,
so they're going to CGI
111
00:05:37,463 --> 00:05:40,883
my face onto, like, his body
or some shit, I don't know.
112
00:05:40,883 --> 00:05:42,385
But I'm doing a scene
with Brad Pitt.
113
00:05:42,385 --> 00:05:43,553
Isn't that cool?
114
00:05:43,553 --> 00:05:46,222
Ooh,
he's working with "Moneyball."
115
00:05:46,222 --> 00:05:47,515
Yeah, yeah.
116
00:05:47,515 --> 00:05:49,100
I'm, uh, I'm really
stoked about it.
117
00:05:49,100 --> 00:05:51,227
I mean, this is like, the first
time I get to do real drama.
118
00:05:51,227 --> 00:05:52,437
Hello, hello.
119
00:05:52,437 --> 00:05:53,896
Hi.
120
00:05:53,896 --> 00:05:56,649
Oh, my God, an angel
just walked in here.
121
00:05:56,649 --> 00:05:58,860
Your beautiful sister
just walked in here.
122
00:05:58,860 --> 00:06:01,154
Uh-oh, she's checking
all my stuff, the nurse.
123
00:06:01,154 --> 00:06:02,363
How you feeling, Poppy?
124
00:06:02,363 --> 00:06:03,948
[chuckling]
I'm feeling OK.
125
00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:05,742
How many patients thought
they died when they opened
126
00:06:05,742 --> 00:06:07,618
their eyes and saw this one?
127
00:06:07,618 --> 00:06:09,662
- Most of them, yeah.
- Peter, I better go.
128
00:06:09,662 --> 00:06:11,080
Have fun in Vietnam.
129
00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:12,081
All right, bye.
130
00:06:12,081 --> 00:06:14,250
Bye.
131
00:06:14,250 --> 00:06:17,253
[pensive music]
132
00:06:17,253 --> 00:06:18,963
♪ ♪
133
00:06:18,963 --> 00:06:21,382
[sighs]
134
00:06:21,382 --> 00:06:24,927
♪ ♪
135
00:06:24,927 --> 00:06:26,429
He's dead.
136
00:06:26,429 --> 00:06:28,097
Hi, Brad. I'm Pete.
137
00:06:28,097 --> 00:06:29,974
Somebody's gonna have to tell
that kid--
138
00:06:29,974 --> 00:06:31,976
Brad, hey.
Hey, Brad. I'm Pete.
139
00:06:31,976 --> 00:06:33,352
Hey, Brad.
140
00:06:33,352 --> 00:06:35,146
I don't have a home.
141
00:06:35,146 --> 00:06:39,567
♪ ♪
142
00:06:43,654 --> 00:06:46,199
Somebody forgot to log out.
143
00:06:46,199 --> 00:06:48,326
Hope you like
"Brokeback Mountain."
144
00:06:48,326 --> 00:06:50,411
There's
a "Look Who's Talking 4?"
145
00:06:50,411 --> 00:06:52,246
Whole cast is back.
Holy shit.
146
00:06:52,246 --> 00:06:53,915
Mm. "Everybody Loves Raymond."
147
00:06:53,915 --> 00:06:56,626
And another purchase
for Sebastian Stan.
148
00:06:56,626 --> 00:07:00,088
[school bell rings]
149
00:07:00,088 --> 00:07:01,923
[indistinct chatter]
150
00:07:01,923 --> 00:07:03,091
Oh, hey.
151
00:07:03,091 --> 00:07:05,343
You got any big plans
for winter break?
152
00:07:05,343 --> 00:07:07,011
No, not really.
How about you?
153
00:07:07,011 --> 00:07:08,471
Jeff's family's
coming to stay with us,
154
00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:09,847
so I'm inventing
different illnesses
155
00:07:09,847 --> 00:07:11,516
to get out of game night.
156
00:07:11,516 --> 00:07:13,101
I'm thinking Lyme's disease.
157
00:07:13,101 --> 00:07:15,895
I don't know.
It'd be nice to have company.
158
00:07:15,895 --> 00:07:17,355
Pete's in Canada
shooting a movie.
159
00:07:17,355 --> 00:07:19,357
I have not heard from him once
since he left.
160
00:07:19,357 --> 00:07:21,275
I'm sure he's just busy.
161
00:07:21,275 --> 00:07:22,860
Hey, how's your dad?
162
00:07:22,860 --> 00:07:25,196
You know, he's doing
really well with the chemo,
163
00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:26,322
thank God.
164
00:07:26,322 --> 00:07:27,865
His appetite's a little weird.
165
00:07:27,865 --> 00:07:29,409
I'm hoping he's going to
make it to Christmas dinner.
166
00:07:29,409 --> 00:07:31,077
I'm making all this food.
167
00:07:31,077 --> 00:07:33,037
It's going to end up being
just me and Casey, you know,
168
00:07:33,037 --> 00:07:34,455
which is fine.
169
00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:37,542
It's not really the Christmas
I am used to, but--
170
00:07:37,542 --> 00:07:39,377
You need to get
out of the house.
171
00:07:39,377 --> 00:07:41,504
Why don't you come play
basketball with us?
172
00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:42,588
What?
173
00:07:42,588 --> 00:07:43,756
Just jump onto a team?
174
00:07:43,756 --> 00:07:45,758
What--I can't do that.
It's been years.
175
00:07:45,758 --> 00:07:47,260
It's 40 and up
basketball for women
176
00:07:47,260 --> 00:07:48,678
who have nothing else to do.
177
00:07:48,678 --> 00:07:50,972
Half of them throw
foul shots underhand.
178
00:07:50,972 --> 00:07:52,515
You'd be LeBron out there.
179
00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:53,975
I don't know.
180
00:07:53,975 --> 00:07:57,103
I mean, I hung up my sneaks
a long time ago.
181
00:07:57,103 --> 00:07:59,272
Come on.
182
00:07:59,272 --> 00:08:01,023
You can bring the snacks.
183
00:08:01,023 --> 00:08:03,151
- Let me check my schedule.
- [chuckles]
184
00:08:03,151 --> 00:08:04,444
All right, yes.
185
00:08:04,444 --> 00:08:05,611
This is where
the magic happens.
186
00:08:05,611 --> 00:08:06,696
Come on in.
187
00:08:06,696 --> 00:08:08,030
Big butt, wow.
188
00:08:08,030 --> 00:08:10,408
Hot set, so just be careful.
Don't touch that.
189
00:08:10,408 --> 00:08:11,659
Holy shit.
190
00:08:11,659 --> 00:08:12,660
Can I get you anything, or--
191
00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:13,661
No, I'm in heaven.
192
00:08:13,661 --> 00:08:14,829
This is fucking sick.
193
00:08:14,829 --> 00:08:17,832
All right.
And Pete has landed.
194
00:08:17,832 --> 00:08:20,043
Oh, my goodness.
195
00:08:22,587 --> 00:08:24,714
Cool. So where's JJ?
196
00:08:24,714 --> 00:08:27,050
Oh!
He's, uh, right here for you.
197
00:08:28,259 --> 00:08:29,552
Oh, hi.
198
00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:31,220
- You're on an iPad.
- Pete, hey.
199
00:08:31,220 --> 00:08:32,930
Thanks so much for filling in,
especially this time of year.
200
00:08:32,930 --> 00:08:34,640
I cannot thank you enough.
201
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,559
You're not just a hero in the
movie; you're a hero to me.
202
00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,728
Yeah, we couldn't
get anyone else.
203
00:08:38,728 --> 00:08:41,522
Uh-huh.
Yeah, well, thanks, man.
204
00:08:41,522 --> 00:08:43,900
I'm--I'm just happy
to be here, so--
205
00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:45,443
Uh--
you haven't, uh,
206
00:08:45,443 --> 00:08:46,611
read the new pages, have you?
207
00:08:46,611 --> 00:08:48,071
No, I didn't--he didn't--
208
00:08:48,071 --> 00:08:49,655
It's OK, it's all--
we've cleaned it up.
209
00:08:49,655 --> 00:08:50,948
We've pared it down
really well.
210
00:08:50,948 --> 00:08:53,034
It's really--it's great.
211
00:08:53,034 --> 00:08:54,410
It's--it's much better now,
I think.
212
00:08:54,410 --> 00:08:55,828
You'll see.
213
00:08:55,828 --> 00:08:58,581
Uh, you--you die
in the first 10 minutes.
214
00:08:58,581 --> 00:08:59,957
Really?
I die?
215
00:08:59,957 --> 00:09:01,834
Because I thought the story
was about a platoon,
216
00:09:01,834 --> 00:09:03,461
and it was true,
and it was about how
217
00:09:03,461 --> 00:09:05,088
they survived all these,
like, miraculous situations--
218
00:09:05,088 --> 00:09:06,422
Chinese chicken salad,
thank you.
219
00:09:06,422 --> 00:09:07,715
Uh, that's true.
220
00:09:07,715 --> 00:09:09,092
But I think the
other thing, though,
221
00:09:09,092 --> 00:09:10,760
is that it's really
important for the movie,
222
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:13,221
like, for the integrity of the
film, uh, the surprise factor.
223
00:09:13,221 --> 00:09:14,722
It's like,
audience is sitting down.
224
00:09:14,722 --> 00:09:16,224
The first 10 minutes,
they're not expecting a thing.
225
00:09:16,224 --> 00:09:17,809
Then, boom!
226
00:09:17,809 --> 00:09:19,769
Pete Davidson's head just
pops off like a Roman candle.
227
00:09:19,769 --> 00:09:21,979
It's going to blow
people's minds.
228
00:09:21,979 --> 00:09:24,357
We have good effects
for that, really good VFX.
229
00:09:24,357 --> 00:09:26,901
Cool, but like, what--
what about my arc?
230
00:09:26,901 --> 00:09:29,779
Listen, I--I hear you.
Everyone wants an arc.
231
00:09:29,779 --> 00:09:31,447
Uh, the truth is
I asked my kids,
232
00:09:31,447 --> 00:09:32,782
you know, who do they want
to see die in the movie?
233
00:09:32,782 --> 00:09:34,242
They said you.
234
00:09:34,242 --> 00:09:35,493
I think it's going to work
great, I'm telling you.
235
00:09:35,493 --> 00:09:36,619
I guess. Yeah.
236
00:09:36,619 --> 00:09:38,204
Um, cool.
Well, yeah.
237
00:09:38,204 --> 00:09:39,664
Uh--you know,
again, I'm just--
238
00:09:39,664 --> 00:09:41,416
I'm just really
happy to be here.
239
00:09:41,416 --> 00:09:43,126
I mean, I can't believe I'm
doing a scene with Brad Pitt.
240
00:09:43,126 --> 00:09:44,127
Yeah.
I got to go, I got to go.
241
00:09:44,127 --> 00:09:45,503
It's going to be great, buddy.
242
00:09:45,503 --> 00:09:47,046
Thank you so much.
243
00:09:47,046 --> 00:09:48,214
- [line beeps]
- Uh, bye.
244
00:09:48,214 --> 00:09:49,382
Um, I was just--
245
00:09:49,382 --> 00:09:51,551
OK, I'll get him--
I'll get him later.
246
00:09:51,551 --> 00:09:54,387
[exhales] Cool.
Is he here?
247
00:09:54,387 --> 00:09:56,139
I--we're doing the
Brad scene now, right?
248
00:09:56,139 --> 00:09:57,974
Uh, yes.
249
00:09:57,974 --> 00:10:01,310
We are shooting
that scene now, exactly.
250
00:10:01,310 --> 00:10:02,520
Yeah.
251
00:10:02,520 --> 00:10:04,272
- That's cool.
- [chuckles]
252
00:10:07,316 --> 00:10:10,194
[exciting music]
253
00:10:10,194 --> 00:10:14,699
♪ ♪
254
00:10:14,699 --> 00:10:16,492
Brad.
255
00:10:16,492 --> 00:10:19,954
♪ ♪
256
00:10:19,954 --> 00:10:21,247
Nice to meet you.
257
00:10:21,247 --> 00:10:24,917
- You're not Brad.
- Devon Leech, Brad's guy.
258
00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:28,171
[chuckles]
Nice to meet you too, man.
259
00:10:28,171 --> 00:10:29,756
Where's Brad?
260
00:10:29,756 --> 00:10:33,301
Brad isn't coming, actually.
261
00:10:33,301 --> 00:10:35,053
It's OK,
you're in good hands.
262
00:10:35,053 --> 00:10:37,305
I've been working
with him since "World War Z."
263
00:10:37,305 --> 00:10:39,849
Every time
you only see the back
264
00:10:39,849 --> 00:10:42,518
of his head,
that's all Leech.
265
00:10:42,518 --> 00:10:44,270
Check this out.
266
00:10:44,270 --> 00:10:47,148
Devon, "Moneyball."
267
00:10:47,148 --> 00:10:49,275
Devon Leech,
Cliff Booth,
268
00:10:49,275 --> 00:10:51,360
"Once Upon a Time
in Hollywood."
269
00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:52,653
Wow.
270
00:10:52,653 --> 00:10:54,614
Yeah, actually,
I totally see it.
271
00:10:54,614 --> 00:10:55,865
It confuses me, man.
272
00:10:55,865 --> 00:10:57,533
I'm in therapy about it.
273
00:10:57,533 --> 00:11:00,119
So is he, um--
is he not coming?
274
00:11:00,119 --> 00:11:03,372
There was a schedule change.
Sorry, yeah.
275
00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:05,374
So you're going to be
working with Devon instead.
276
00:11:05,374 --> 00:11:08,586
The producers let Brad spend
Christmas with his family.
277
00:11:08,586 --> 00:11:11,047
And you'll still be on the
screen with him, of course.
278
00:11:11,047 --> 00:11:12,757
And see him at
the premiere, maybe.
279
00:11:12,757 --> 00:11:14,675
Maybe?
280
00:11:14,675 --> 00:11:16,844
I'll be there.
I got you, bro.
281
00:11:16,844 --> 00:11:18,721
Yeah, that's great.
That's great.
282
00:11:18,721 --> 00:11:20,973
It's going to be fun.
283
00:11:20,973 --> 00:11:22,392
We'll just--
we'll get this started,
284
00:11:22,392 --> 00:11:23,893
and we'll just--yeah,
we'll--let's get--
285
00:11:23,893 --> 00:11:25,144
let's get you on your marks.
286
00:11:25,144 --> 00:11:26,312
Whoo!
287
00:11:26,312 --> 00:11:27,563
Let's do this!
288
00:11:27,563 --> 00:11:30,817
Last looks on Leech.
289
00:11:30,817 --> 00:11:32,443
And action!
290
00:11:32,443 --> 00:11:33,736
Sorry, grunt.
291
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:35,571
My job is to get you home.
292
00:11:35,571 --> 00:11:37,073
Home?
293
00:11:37,073 --> 00:11:39,117
I stopped having a home
the day I watched Roberts
294
00:11:39,117 --> 00:11:40,827
get gutted like a fish.
295
00:11:40,827 --> 00:11:42,912
God damn it, Finnerty!
296
00:11:42,912 --> 00:11:45,832
Don't you dare tell me
what home is!
297
00:11:45,832 --> 00:11:47,083
This is our home now!
298
00:11:47,083 --> 00:11:48,418
[whispering]
Is he doing Downey?
299
00:11:48,418 --> 00:11:49,836
Roberts had a kid!
300
00:11:49,836 --> 00:11:51,003
Somebody's going to
have to tell that kid
301
00:11:51,003 --> 00:11:52,588
that his daddy is dead.
302
00:11:52,588 --> 00:11:57,468
Someone's going to have to say,
your dad, he's dead!
303
00:11:57,468 --> 00:12:00,471
[phone ringing]
304
00:12:01,723 --> 00:12:02,724
Hi, Pete!
305
00:12:02,724 --> 00:12:03,891
How are you?
306
00:12:03,891 --> 00:12:04,892
It's so nice
to hear your voice.
307
00:12:04,892 --> 00:12:06,102
How is Brad?
308
00:12:06,102 --> 00:12:07,854
- Is he dreamy?
- Hey, Ma.
309
00:12:07,854 --> 00:12:09,105
How's Poppy doing?
310
00:12:09,105 --> 00:12:09,981
You know, he's--
he's all right.
311
00:12:09,981 --> 00:12:11,399
He's cranky.
312
00:12:11,399 --> 00:12:13,192
He just, uh, called the TV
a word that we're not
313
00:12:13,192 --> 00:12:15,570
supposed to say anymore,
because he couldn't find, um,
314
00:12:15,570 --> 00:12:16,863
"It's a Wonderful Life."
315
00:12:16,863 --> 00:12:19,240
And I told you
that Borgnine ate
316
00:12:19,240 --> 00:12:21,033
all the Christmas decorations.
317
00:12:21,033 --> 00:12:25,204
I was able to replace them
on Amazon Prime overnight.
318
00:12:25,204 --> 00:12:26,414
Casey!
319
00:12:26,414 --> 00:12:28,291
Come put this
on the front door.
320
00:12:28,291 --> 00:12:30,126
Oh, honey.
I wish you were here.
321
00:12:30,126 --> 00:12:32,754
Yeah.
Well, you know, it's reshoots.
322
00:12:32,754 --> 00:12:34,881
So it's not like I have
a fucking choice, you know.
323
00:12:34,881 --> 00:12:36,299
Oh, I know.
324
00:12:36,299 --> 00:12:38,342
Just, uh--
I don't know how many more,
325
00:12:38,342 --> 00:12:39,969
uh, Christmases we're going
to get with Poppy,
326
00:12:39,969 --> 00:12:41,846
- you know?
- Yeah, I know, all right?
327
00:12:41,846 --> 00:12:44,140
You don't gotta guilt trip me,
you know?
328
00:12:44,140 --> 00:12:45,516
There's nothing
I can do about it.
329
00:12:45,516 --> 00:12:47,602
I'm fucking stuck in Canada
with nobody I even like.
330
00:12:47,602 --> 00:12:49,187
No offense.
331
00:12:49,187 --> 00:12:50,438
No, I'm--I'm not trying
to make you feel bad.
332
00:12:50,438 --> 00:12:51,981
I'm just saying that,
you know, we miss you.
333
00:12:51,981 --> 00:12:54,150
We wish you were here.
That's all.
334
00:12:54,150 --> 00:12:55,818
I got to go. I got to go.
I'm at work.
335
00:12:55,818 --> 00:12:57,153
I'll call you later.
336
00:12:57,153 --> 00:12:59,030
OK.
I love you, honey. Bye.
337
00:12:59,030 --> 00:13:00,990
[line beeps]
338
00:13:07,538 --> 00:13:09,499
[sighs]
339
00:13:09,499 --> 00:13:11,584
Hey, how much longer
for the neck pussy, huh?
340
00:13:11,584 --> 00:13:13,503
- 10 minutes, ish.
- All right, cool.
341
00:13:13,503 --> 00:13:15,421
I'm going to go smoke
a cigarette, all right?
342
00:13:15,421 --> 00:13:16,756
Oh, really?
343
00:13:16,756 --> 00:13:17,840
Um--well,
as soon as he's done,
344
00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:18,800
we're going to need you on set.
345
00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:20,510
We're moving.
346
00:13:20,510 --> 00:13:21,677
Cool.
347
00:13:21,677 --> 00:13:23,012
I'll just--I'll just
take a break, then.
348
00:13:23,012 --> 00:13:24,555
All right, cool.
I'll be back.
349
00:13:26,474 --> 00:13:29,435
[pensive music]
350
00:13:29,435 --> 00:13:36,401
♪ ♪
351
00:13:47,912 --> 00:13:50,998
[pensive music]
352
00:13:50,998 --> 00:13:57,797
♪ ♪
353
00:14:00,091 --> 00:14:03,010
[bowling pins clattering]
354
00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:10,143
♪ ♪
355
00:14:12,812 --> 00:14:14,063
Yo.
356
00:14:14,063 --> 00:14:15,940
Whoa.
357
00:14:15,940 --> 00:14:19,235
You're--you're Pete Davidson.
358
00:14:19,235 --> 00:14:20,737
What are you doing here?
359
00:14:20,737 --> 00:14:23,114
[stammers]
360
00:14:23,114 --> 00:14:24,741
Are you on vacation?
361
00:14:24,741 --> 00:14:26,451
Sure.
362
00:14:26,451 --> 00:14:28,619
Do you want to bowl?
363
00:14:28,619 --> 00:14:29,579
No.
364
00:14:29,579 --> 00:14:31,289
Are you here for the arcade?
365
00:14:33,249 --> 00:14:34,792
Uh, do you want some pizza?
366
00:14:36,753 --> 00:14:38,629
Listen, you guys.
I need some drugs.
367
00:14:38,629 --> 00:14:39,756
Like now, OK?
368
00:14:39,756 --> 00:14:41,466
I'm really fucked up,
all right?
369
00:14:41,466 --> 00:14:42,967
I'm out here doing a war movie.
The director's on the iPad.
370
00:14:42,967 --> 00:14:45,219
They tell me Brad Pitt's going
to be in it, and he's not.
371
00:14:45,219 --> 00:14:46,429
It's Devon Leech!
372
00:14:46,429 --> 00:14:48,264
- Who's Devon Leech?
- Exactly!
373
00:14:48,264 --> 00:14:49,891
It looks exactly like
Brad Pitt, but it's not!
374
00:14:49,891 --> 00:14:52,769
And I'm all fucked up and
alone, and my grandpa's dying,
375
00:14:52,769 --> 00:14:55,229
and all my friends won't answer
my fucking phone calls,
376
00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:57,106
and I would just
really appreciate it
377
00:14:57,106 --> 00:15:00,735
if either one of you
had anything.
378
00:15:01,152 --> 00:15:04,989
Bro, we got you.
379
00:15:04,989 --> 00:15:06,908
All right.
380
00:15:08,034 --> 00:15:10,578
The fuck is this, Nesquik?
381
00:15:10,578 --> 00:15:12,747
- Just smoke it like weed.
- You sure?
382
00:15:12,747 --> 00:15:14,791
We're working at a
bowling alley on Christmas.
383
00:15:14,791 --> 00:15:17,126
We take getting high
very seriously.
384
00:15:17,126 --> 00:15:18,795
- [phone ringing]
- Good answer.
385
00:15:18,795 --> 00:15:21,339
Hold on a second.
386
00:15:21,339 --> 00:15:22,840
What's up, dick?
387
00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:24,258
Hey, where are you, man?
388
00:15:24,258 --> 00:15:25,843
They're, like, freaking out
that you're not on set.
389
00:15:25,843 --> 00:15:26,928
I'm fine, man.
390
00:15:26,928 --> 00:15:28,388
I'm at a bowling alley
with my friends.
391
00:15:28,388 --> 00:15:29,263
Wait,
are you there to buy drugs?
392
00:15:29,263 --> 00:15:30,640
Yeah.
393
00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:31,766
I wouldn't have to do this
shit if you were here.
394
00:15:31,766 --> 00:15:33,101
I--I know.
395
00:15:33,101 --> 00:15:34,310
I'm just, like, in the
middle of, like, Christmas
396
00:15:34,310 --> 00:15:36,312
with Lizzie's family
right now, you know?
397
00:15:36,312 --> 00:15:37,855
Dude, break out.
Fuck that shit.
398
00:15:37,855 --> 00:15:39,065
Just--just leave.
399
00:15:39,065 --> 00:15:40,316
Just come hang out
with me in Canada, man.
400
00:15:40,316 --> 00:15:41,401
Come on.
It'll be fun.
401
00:15:41,401 --> 00:15:42,652
I really can't.
402
00:15:42,652 --> 00:15:46,197
I'm--I'm in a, like,
very Hallmark situation.
403
00:15:46,197 --> 00:15:47,865
Dude.
Just come, man.
404
00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:49,826
Just hop on a flight.
We'll have fun.
405
00:15:49,826 --> 00:15:52,787
We could bowl
and have pizza, I guess.
406
00:15:52,787 --> 00:15:55,039
Man, it is like
so Christmas over here,
407
00:15:55,039 --> 00:15:57,834
and her dad keeps
calling me son.
408
00:15:57,834 --> 00:15:59,836
I'm in deep, man.
409
00:15:59,836 --> 00:16:01,671
- I'm in really deep.
- Whatever, man.
410
00:16:01,671 --> 00:16:03,965
Merry Christmas. Fucking...
411
00:16:03,965 --> 00:16:05,883
Pete?
[line beeps]
412
00:16:05,883 --> 00:16:06,884
Shit.
413
00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:11,931
So what happened
to your neck?
414
00:16:11,931 --> 00:16:14,183
I got shot.
415
00:16:14,183 --> 00:16:15,685
- Oh.
- Damn.
416
00:16:15,685 --> 00:16:18,980
Hey, thanks, guys.
Merry Christmas.
417
00:16:22,775 --> 00:16:25,361
Pete Davidson's
on the brown stuff.
418
00:16:25,361 --> 00:16:26,529
[laughter]
419
00:16:31,743 --> 00:16:32,869
[spits]
420
00:16:44,172 --> 00:16:46,799
[sighs] Fuck.
421
00:17:14,952 --> 00:17:17,538
[groans, coughs]
422
00:17:24,754 --> 00:17:28,174
[Jimmy Soul's
"If You Wanna Be Happy"]
423
00:17:28,174 --> 00:17:31,135
* If you wanna be happy
for the rest of your life ♪
424
00:17:31,135 --> 00:17:33,679
♪ Never make
a pretty woman your wife ♪
425
00:17:33,679 --> 00:17:36,307
♪ So for my personal
point of view ♪
426
00:17:36,307 --> 00:17:38,726
♪ Get an ugly girl
to marry you ♪
427
00:17:38,726 --> 00:17:41,312
♪ If you wanna be happy
for the rest of your life ♪
428
00:17:41,312 --> 00:17:44,107
♪ Never make
a pretty woman your wife ♪
429
00:17:44,107 --> 00:17:46,734
♪ So for my personal
point of view ♪
430
00:17:46,734 --> 00:17:49,112
♪ Get an ugly girl
to marry you ♪
431
00:17:49,112 --> 00:17:51,739
♪ A pretty woman
makes her man look small ♪
432
00:17:51,739 --> 00:17:53,991
♪ And very often
causes his downfall ♪
433
00:17:53,991 --> 00:17:55,868
♪ As soon as he marries her ♪
434
00:17:55,868 --> 00:17:57,829
♪ Then she starts
doing the things ♪
435
00:17:57,829 --> 00:17:59,330
♪ That will break his heart ♪
436
00:17:59,330 --> 00:18:02,083
♪ But if you make
an ugly woman your wife ♪
437
00:18:02,083 --> 00:18:04,711
♪ You'll be happy
for the rest of your life ♪
438
00:18:04,711 --> 00:18:07,171
♪ An ugly woman
cooks meals on time ♪
439
00:18:07,171 --> 00:18:09,549
♪ She'll always give you
peace of mind ♪
440
00:18:09,549 --> 00:18:12,135
♪ If you wanna be happy
for the rest of your life ♪
441
00:18:12,135 --> 00:18:13,761
[music stops]
442
00:18:18,099 --> 00:18:19,600
How you doing, Dad?
You need anything?
443
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:21,644
No, I got everything I need.
444
00:18:21,644 --> 00:18:23,062
- Feel great, thanks.
- Good, good.
445
00:18:23,062 --> 00:18:24,731
It's a lot of food
for three people.
446
00:18:24,731 --> 00:18:27,650
I know.
It's a very special Christmas.
447
00:18:27,650 --> 00:18:28,901
If there's leftovers,
maybe we should
448
00:18:28,901 --> 00:18:30,653
take it to a food bank tomorrow.
449
00:18:30,653 --> 00:18:32,321
- Oh--
- Well, that's a nice idea.
450
00:18:32,321 --> 00:18:36,200
You reminded me, I gotta--
gotta take a plate downstairs.
451
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:38,494
Mom, Pete's not here.
452
00:18:38,494 --> 00:18:39,954
Oh, I know.
453
00:18:39,954 --> 00:18:42,206
But, uh, the boys are
downstairs watching a movie.
454
00:18:42,206 --> 00:18:44,125
- Probably starving to death.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
455
00:18:44,125 --> 00:18:45,960
You mean these guys still
come and hang out downstairs,
456
00:18:45,960 --> 00:18:47,086
- even when he's not here?
- Yeah.
457
00:18:47,086 --> 00:18:48,546
I'm just going to
bring them a plate,
458
00:18:48,546 --> 00:18:49,881
might give them a little
something to nibble on.
459
00:18:49,881 --> 00:18:52,925
No, you're not.
Come and sit down.
460
00:18:52,925 --> 00:18:55,928
You know, boys got to eat.
It's Christmas.
461
00:18:55,928 --> 00:18:58,347
- You got to eat.
- I am. I'm eating.
462
00:18:58,347 --> 00:19:00,016
You already gave them shelter.
463
00:19:00,016 --> 00:19:01,601
What, do you want
to feed them, too?
464
00:19:01,601 --> 00:19:03,853
Give me your hands.
465
00:19:03,853 --> 00:19:06,731
We'll think about Peter,
hope he's OK.
466
00:19:06,731 --> 00:19:09,484
And everything's good?
467
00:19:09,484 --> 00:19:11,277
- Yeah. OK.
- OK. Let's eat.
468
00:19:11,277 --> 00:19:14,280
To my big brother George,
the richest man in town.
469
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:16,824
[all cheering]
470
00:19:16,824 --> 00:19:19,619
all: * Should
auld acquaintance ♪
471
00:19:19,619 --> 00:19:24,707
♪ Be forgot and never ♪
472
00:19:24,707 --> 00:19:27,960
Fuck yeah, Clarence.
Get those wings, baby.
473
00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:33,758
all: * Should auld
acquaintance be forgot ♪
474
00:19:33,758 --> 00:19:37,428
♪ And days
of auld lang syne? ♪
475
00:19:37,428 --> 00:19:38,721
What's that?
476
00:19:38,721 --> 00:19:42,100
[line trilling]
477
00:19:42,100 --> 00:19:45,144
This is Nikki.
Leave a message.
478
00:19:45,144 --> 00:19:47,438
Look, Daddy!
Teacher says...
479
00:19:47,438 --> 00:19:51,067
[upbeat music]
480
00:19:51,067 --> 00:19:53,486
[phone ringing]
481
00:19:53,486 --> 00:19:55,530
[coughs]
482
00:19:55,530 --> 00:19:58,032
Yo, shut up, bro.
Pete's calling.
483
00:19:58,032 --> 00:19:59,033
Hey, Pete!
484
00:19:59,033 --> 00:20:01,411
What's up there,
movie star man?
485
00:20:01,411 --> 00:20:02,829
Hey.
486
00:20:02,829 --> 00:20:04,163
Are--are you guys
all in the basement?
487
00:20:04,163 --> 00:20:05,998
Oh, we're just having
a little holiday shindig.
488
00:20:05,998 --> 00:20:07,208
Cannabis-mas,
you know how it is.
489
00:20:07,208 --> 00:20:09,168
- You know the drill.
- Cannabis-mas?
490
00:20:09,168 --> 00:20:11,170
You're doing
Cannabis-mas without me?
491
00:20:11,170 --> 00:20:13,756
But I, like, invented it.
492
00:20:13,756 --> 00:20:15,508
So you invented smoking
weed on Christmas?
493
00:20:15,508 --> 00:20:17,510
Is that Peter?
494
00:20:17,510 --> 00:20:19,387
Hey.
Hi, Mom.
495
00:20:19,387 --> 00:20:20,888
- Mama D here--
- Oh.
496
00:20:20,888 --> 00:20:23,474
- Merry Christmas, sweet pea.
- With--with the good food.
497
00:20:23,474 --> 00:20:26,394
I wish you were here, honey.
I got all your favorite things.
498
00:20:26,394 --> 00:20:28,020
I made the little
turkey sandwiches
499
00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:29,647
- with the honey mustard.
- Mmm.
500
00:20:29,647 --> 00:20:31,357
I got your rainbow cookies.
501
00:20:31,357 --> 00:20:32,734
Mmm.
502
00:20:32,734 --> 00:20:35,027
Oh, yeah.
Those are my favorite.
503
00:20:35,027 --> 00:20:37,196
I wish I was there,
but I'm not. Heh.
504
00:20:37,196 --> 00:20:40,867
Ma, you know, if you feed
these guys, they won't leave.
505
00:20:40,867 --> 00:20:42,869
Celebrating baby Jesus,
506
00:20:42,869 --> 00:20:44,370
having cannolis
with the Davidsons.
507
00:20:44,370 --> 00:20:46,372
- Don't get no better than this.
- All right, guys, enjoy.
508
00:20:46,372 --> 00:20:47,707
There's a lot more upstairs
if you want it.
509
00:20:47,707 --> 00:20:48,916
Goodbye, honey.
I love you.
510
00:20:48,916 --> 00:20:50,168
- Thank you, Mama D.
- Thank you, Mama.
511
00:20:50,168 --> 00:20:51,919
- You're welcome.
- Bye, Ma.
512
00:20:51,919 --> 00:20:53,713
Well, uh--why don't
you guys just come here?
513
00:20:53,713 --> 00:20:55,214
I'll fly you guys all out.
514
00:20:55,214 --> 00:20:57,216
Nah, I'm stuck
in the city till New Year's.
515
00:20:57,216 --> 00:20:59,177
You know my mama don't fuck
around with Christmas season.
516
00:20:59,177 --> 00:21:00,386
I would love
to be there for you,
517
00:21:00,386 --> 00:21:02,013
but I don't want to.
518
00:21:02,013 --> 00:21:04,891
I don't fuck with Canada,
and Canada don't fuck with me.
519
00:21:04,891 --> 00:21:06,392
It's actually
pretty cool here.
520
00:21:06,392 --> 00:21:08,019
They have their own theme song.
521
00:21:08,019 --> 00:21:10,438
Mm-hmm.
Stay strong there, bruh.
522
00:21:10,438 --> 00:21:12,857
Work smarter, not harder,
so we don't have to.
523
00:21:12,857 --> 00:21:15,109
Long live Pete Davidson.
524
00:21:15,109 --> 00:21:17,445
[scatting]
525
00:21:17,445 --> 00:21:20,073
- [line beeps]
- [scatting]
526
00:21:22,408 --> 00:21:25,328
[sighs]
527
00:21:36,047 --> 00:21:37,799
[grunts]
528
00:21:45,348 --> 00:21:48,309
[choking, grunts]
529
00:21:51,062 --> 00:21:54,565
[dramatic music plays]
530
00:21:54,565 --> 00:22:01,406
♪ ♪
531
00:22:03,157 --> 00:22:04,992
I see you chose
to enter the saloon,
532
00:22:04,992 --> 00:22:07,453
instead of not
entering the saloon.
533
00:22:07,453 --> 00:22:09,038
That's right.
534
00:22:09,038 --> 00:22:11,666
And I have a card in my hand--
535
00:22:11,666 --> 00:22:13,584
the ace of spades.
536
00:22:13,584 --> 00:22:15,962
He made it?
537
00:22:15,962 --> 00:22:18,548
He actually did it.
Holy shit.
538
00:22:18,548 --> 00:22:19,841
What a coincidence.
539
00:22:19,841 --> 00:22:23,428
Ace, Spade.
540
00:22:23,428 --> 00:22:27,974
Where did you find it,
that card that's your name?
541
00:22:29,308 --> 00:22:33,062
Maybe I should go home
to my wife.
542
00:22:33,062 --> 00:22:35,314
Do I even have a wife?
543
00:22:35,314 --> 00:22:38,151
Maybe I should stay,
because I play cards good.
544
00:22:38,151 --> 00:22:41,904
Superman plays cards good.
545
00:22:41,904 --> 00:22:44,782
You play cards well.
546
00:22:44,782 --> 00:22:46,033
Well.
547
00:22:46,033 --> 00:22:49,662
both: Well, well, well.
548
00:22:49,662 --> 00:22:50,872
[head thumps]
549
00:22:54,459 --> 00:22:55,877
- How you feeling?
- I'm kind of nervous.
550
00:22:55,877 --> 00:22:56,919
I haven't done this
in a long time.
551
00:22:56,919 --> 00:22:59,047
Oh, it'll be good for you.
552
00:22:59,047 --> 00:23:01,215
This is a great place
to put all your energy.
553
00:23:01,215 --> 00:23:02,717
We leave it all on the floor.
554
00:23:02,717 --> 00:23:03,926
What does that mean?
555
00:23:03,926 --> 00:23:05,470
I mean, just look at Lisa.
556
00:23:05,470 --> 00:23:08,765
Yeah, I heard her husband
cheated on her with the doula.
557
00:23:08,765 --> 00:23:11,100
I know.
Look at her now.
558
00:23:12,101 --> 00:23:14,020
- [whistle tweets]
- All right, ladies.
559
00:23:14,020 --> 00:23:15,438
Let's get this going.
560
00:23:15,438 --> 00:23:17,106
Lisa, we're starting.
561
00:23:17,106 --> 00:23:20,234
[exhales]
[joints cracking]
562
00:23:23,654 --> 00:23:26,324
[grunts]
563
00:23:26,324 --> 00:23:28,910
Did she just crack her pussy?
564
00:23:28,910 --> 00:23:30,453
[knock at door]
565
00:23:30,453 --> 00:23:33,456
[coughing]
566
00:23:38,669 --> 00:23:40,004
What?
567
00:23:40,004 --> 00:23:42,382
Housekeeping.
568
00:23:42,382 --> 00:23:44,342
Fuck.
569
00:23:50,932 --> 00:23:53,309
So sorry about that.
570
00:24:03,694 --> 00:24:04,946
[indistinct shouting]
571
00:24:04,946 --> 00:24:06,781
- Ready, go!
- Over here!
572
00:24:06,781 --> 00:24:08,449
Here, here!
Over here!
573
00:24:10,368 --> 00:24:11,828
Get off me!
574
00:24:11,828 --> 00:24:13,538
[grunts]
575
00:24:14,622 --> 00:24:15,665
Yeah!
Yeah!
576
00:24:15,665 --> 00:24:16,999
Take that!
Take that!
577
00:24:16,999 --> 00:24:18,668
Yes, let's go!
Let's go!
578
00:24:18,668 --> 00:24:21,379
Are you OK?
You're bleeding.
579
00:24:21,379 --> 00:24:23,172
- Do you need a minute?
- No.
580
00:24:23,172 --> 00:24:25,967
I'm going to
destroy that bitch.
581
00:24:25,967 --> 00:24:27,427
Let's go!
582
00:24:27,427 --> 00:24:30,388
[hip-hop music]
583
00:24:30,388 --> 00:24:31,973
♪ ♪
584
00:24:31,973 --> 00:24:33,474
Everybody clear out.
585
00:24:33,474 --> 00:24:34,934
Iso!
Iso!
586
00:24:34,934 --> 00:24:36,894
♪ ♪
587
00:24:36,894 --> 00:24:39,021
[aggressive grunting]
Come on.
588
00:24:39,021 --> 00:24:40,189
♪ Make shit impossible ♪
589
00:24:40,189 --> 00:24:41,691
♪ Night and day... ♪
590
00:24:41,691 --> 00:24:43,401
Ahh!
591
00:24:43,401 --> 00:24:46,404
♪ ♪
592
00:24:46,404 --> 00:24:47,697
Boom!
593
00:24:47,697 --> 00:24:51,367
♪ ♪
594
00:24:51,367 --> 00:24:53,995
This is why I do this.
This is why I do this.
595
00:24:53,995 --> 00:24:55,705
Good job, ladies.
Let's go!
596
00:24:55,705 --> 00:24:58,708
[soft pensive music]
597
00:24:58,708 --> 00:25:02,295
♪ ♪
598
00:25:02,295 --> 00:25:05,214
[coughs]
599
00:25:17,810 --> 00:25:19,562
Oh, hello.
600
00:25:19,562 --> 00:25:21,814
- Hey.
- Hey.
601
00:25:21,814 --> 00:25:24,025
You made it.
602
00:25:24,025 --> 00:25:26,069
Did you get some sleep?
603
00:25:26,069 --> 00:25:27,570
I was thinking
about sleeping.
604
00:25:27,570 --> 00:25:30,656
But I did so many drugs,
I thought maybe I shouldn't,
605
00:25:30,656 --> 00:25:32,408
because I would probably die.
606
00:25:33,659 --> 00:25:35,703
Yeah.
607
00:25:35,703 --> 00:25:36,954
OK.
608
00:25:36,954 --> 00:25:39,082
Let's just get you cleaned up.
609
00:25:39,082 --> 00:25:41,250
You know, they say
you, uh, never, uh,
610
00:25:41,250 --> 00:25:44,045
work a day in your life
if you love what you do.
611
00:25:44,045 --> 00:25:47,173
So--so I love you.
612
00:25:49,133 --> 00:25:50,093
I'll get you some coffee.
613
00:25:50,093 --> 00:25:51,844
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
614
00:25:51,844 --> 00:25:52,970
That was fun today.
615
00:25:52,970 --> 00:25:54,806
Yeah.
Yeah, it was.
616
00:25:54,806 --> 00:25:56,099
Did you see my dunk?
617
00:25:56,099 --> 00:25:57,225
Yeah, man.
618
00:25:57,225 --> 00:25:58,768
You really took it to the hole.
619
00:25:58,768 --> 00:26:00,061
Yeah.
620
00:26:00,061 --> 00:26:01,604
Yeah,
I had to call for the iso.
621
00:26:01,604 --> 00:26:03,981
Good one.
622
00:26:03,981 --> 00:26:06,150
Welcome to
the South Island Handmaids.
623
00:26:08,152 --> 00:26:11,114
[eerie music]
624
00:26:11,114 --> 00:26:15,493
♪ ♪
625
00:26:15,493 --> 00:26:19,455
[sighs]
626
00:26:19,455 --> 00:26:21,374
I couldn't get
the tape back,
627
00:26:21,374 --> 00:26:24,293
which I know sounds
like bad news
628
00:26:24,293 --> 00:26:25,795
but actually is good news.
629
00:26:25,795 --> 00:26:27,755
Because if that tape existed,
630
00:26:27,755 --> 00:26:31,217
we wouldn't be able
to get married again.
631
00:26:31,217 --> 00:26:32,802
[laughter]
632
00:26:32,802 --> 00:26:35,179
[muffled chatter]
633
00:26:35,179 --> 00:26:42,353
♪ ♪
634
00:26:45,982 --> 00:26:48,484
[knock at door]
[door clicks]
635
00:26:54,574 --> 00:26:56,200
Dad?
636
00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:58,619
No, it's Ray.
637
00:26:59,871 --> 00:27:01,622
How you doing, buddy?
638
00:27:01,622 --> 00:27:03,708
- What are you doing here?
- Talk to me, man.
639
00:27:03,708 --> 00:27:05,585
What's going on?
640
00:27:05,585 --> 00:27:06,836
OK, Ray Romano.
641
00:27:06,836 --> 00:27:09,672
Well, um, I'm all alone here
during Christmas,
642
00:27:09,672 --> 00:27:11,466
and nobody seems to care.
643
00:27:11,466 --> 00:27:14,802
And my Poppy is dying, and
he's pretending like he's OK.
644
00:27:14,802 --> 00:27:16,179
But we all know he isn't.
645
00:27:16,179 --> 00:27:18,931
That's a shame. Yeah.
646
00:27:18,931 --> 00:27:20,767
Hey, you mind if I, uh,
647
00:27:20,767 --> 00:27:22,685
pick through this
Joan's on Third basket?
648
00:27:22,685 --> 00:27:24,562
Yeah, help yourself.
649
00:27:27,398 --> 00:27:31,235
Yeah, I mean, uh, grandpas...
650
00:27:31,235 --> 00:27:32,528
they give you
a little bit of wisdom,
651
00:27:32,528 --> 00:27:34,989
and then they die, all right?
652
00:27:34,989 --> 00:27:36,699
That's what they do.
653
00:27:36,699 --> 00:27:39,118
But you still got
your mother, right?
654
00:27:39,118 --> 00:27:41,162
You got your sister--
655
00:27:41,162 --> 00:27:43,539
to a lesser extent,
your friends.
656
00:27:43,539 --> 00:27:45,208
Yeah.
I don't know, man.
657
00:27:45,208 --> 00:27:47,043
I just--I feel
really pathetic
658
00:27:47,043 --> 00:27:48,586
and, like, a loser, and maybe--
659
00:27:48,586 --> 00:27:51,631
maybe everyone's just
better off without me.
660
00:27:51,631 --> 00:27:55,676
Maybe they are, but you
shouldn't focus on that.
661
00:27:55,676 --> 00:27:57,887
You're doing great.
662
00:27:57,887 --> 00:28:01,182
You're taking drugs to make
yourself feel better, right?
663
00:28:01,182 --> 00:28:02,934
Here's what you need to do.
664
00:28:02,934 --> 00:28:04,769
Fuck your way out of it.
665
00:28:04,769 --> 00:28:07,313
If you take anything
from this conversation,
666
00:28:07,313 --> 00:28:10,733
it's that you should
get yourself sucked.
667
00:28:12,276 --> 00:28:14,404
- Yeah, sure.
- You got the drugs, right?
668
00:28:14,404 --> 00:28:15,780
You got the bowling
alley drugs?
669
00:28:15,780 --> 00:28:17,615
You got the ketamine?
What's it called, ketamine?
670
00:28:17,615 --> 00:28:19,409
Yeah, but I don't want
to end up in a K hole.
671
00:28:19,409 --> 00:28:20,535
I don't know what that is.
672
00:28:20,535 --> 00:28:21,744
But you got to fall
into a butthole,
673
00:28:21,744 --> 00:28:23,746
is what you got to do.
674
00:28:23,746 --> 00:28:24,872
Come on, man.
675
00:28:24,872 --> 00:28:26,666
Kills me to see you
fucking like this.
676
00:28:26,666 --> 00:28:29,585
You know what your problem is?
You don't got any problems.
677
00:28:29,585 --> 00:28:31,587
You're too smart.
You're too funny.
678
00:28:31,587 --> 00:28:33,756
You're fucking--
you're too good at everything.
679
00:28:33,756 --> 00:28:36,217
You should write a book.
I'd read that book.
680
00:28:36,217 --> 00:28:37,552
Just fuck everything.
681
00:28:37,552 --> 00:28:39,637
You ain't getting
any younger, man.
682
00:28:39,637 --> 00:28:42,223
Come on.
You got that big dick, right?
683
00:28:42,223 --> 00:28:44,517
You're like pussy Thanos.
684
00:28:44,517 --> 00:28:46,894
Just get out there
and fuck, man.
685
00:28:46,894 --> 00:28:49,856
The luckiest man...
[laughter]
686
00:28:49,856 --> 00:28:53,192
On the face of the Earth.
687
00:28:53,192 --> 00:28:55,737
- What the fuck?
- 3, 2, 1.
688
00:28:55,737 --> 00:28:57,113
[wire snaps]
689
00:28:57,113 --> 00:28:59,323
[grunts]
690
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:02,952
- Wait a sec.
- 2--
691
00:29:02,952 --> 00:29:04,287
- Hang on.
- 1.
692
00:29:04,287 --> 00:29:06,914
[wire snaps]
693
00:29:06,914 --> 00:29:09,500
[groans]
694
00:29:11,878 --> 00:29:13,796
- 1.
- Fuck!
695
00:29:13,796 --> 00:29:15,006
[grunting]
696
00:29:15,006 --> 00:29:17,216
Cut!
[bell rings]
697
00:29:17,216 --> 00:29:19,594
Fuck!
Thanks, boys.
698
00:29:19,594 --> 00:29:23,139
And that's a wrap
on Pete Davidson.
699
00:29:23,139 --> 00:29:24,599
- Whoa. Wrap?
- Yeah.
700
00:29:24,599 --> 00:29:26,476
I thought it was,
like, six days.
701
00:29:26,476 --> 00:29:28,811
Great job.
No, it's been two weeks.
702
00:29:28,811 --> 00:29:29,771
Oh.
703
00:29:29,771 --> 00:29:31,189
It was great
working with you.
704
00:29:31,189 --> 00:29:32,398
- You, too.
- Yeah.
705
00:29:32,398 --> 00:29:34,776
Uh, what's your name?
706
00:29:34,776 --> 00:29:36,235
Uh, Monica.
707
00:29:36,235 --> 00:29:37,695
Monica.
708
00:29:37,695 --> 00:29:39,322
Monica, yeah.
709
00:29:39,322 --> 00:29:41,866
So, uh,
on the next one, right?
710
00:29:41,866 --> 00:29:43,493
I love you.
711
00:29:43,493 --> 00:29:45,995
All of you, I love--
I love all of you.
712
00:29:45,995 --> 00:29:46,913
- Good luck.
- All right.
713
00:29:46,913 --> 00:29:48,831
Thank--OK.
714
00:29:50,625 --> 00:29:53,711
[synth music, clock ticking]
715
00:29:53,711 --> 00:29:58,466
♪ ♪
716
00:29:58,466 --> 00:30:01,010
Merry Christmas,
Pete Davidson.
717
00:30:01,010 --> 00:30:06,933
♪ ♪
718
00:30:06,933 --> 00:30:08,893
I give him six months.
719
00:30:08,893 --> 00:30:15,900
♪ ♪
720
00:30:35,211 --> 00:30:36,379
Thanks, man.
721
00:30:36,379 --> 00:30:37,547
I don't know what
I'd do without you.
722
00:30:37,547 --> 00:30:38,423
Thanks for bringing
my credit card.
723
00:30:38,423 --> 00:30:39,716
Yeah, yeah.
724
00:30:39,716 --> 00:30:41,968
Um, I've been here
for, like, three hours.
725
00:30:41,968 --> 00:30:45,888
How's, uh--uh...
726
00:30:45,888 --> 00:30:47,014
what's--what's her face?
727
00:30:47,014 --> 00:30:48,349
- Oh, Lizzie.
- Yeah.
728
00:30:48,349 --> 00:30:50,184
Yeah, it's great.
It's been, like, five years.
729
00:30:50,184 --> 00:30:52,061
I can't, uh,
wait for you to meet her.
730
00:30:52,061 --> 00:30:53,896
Pete!
731
00:30:56,357 --> 00:30:57,608
Oh, no.
732
00:30:57,608 --> 00:30:58,484
Hi.
733
00:30:58,484 --> 00:31:00,278
It stops now.
734
00:31:00,278 --> 00:31:01,571
What?
735
00:31:01,571 --> 00:31:02,905
I know what's going on.
736
00:31:02,905 --> 00:31:04,282
What are you talking about,
Sebastian Stan?
737
00:31:04,282 --> 00:31:06,409
Shh!
No more talking.
738
00:31:06,409 --> 00:31:07,910
Only listening, OK?
739
00:31:07,910 --> 00:31:08,995
Because I'm only going
to say this once.
740
00:31:08,995 --> 00:31:10,413
It stops now.
741
00:31:10,413 --> 00:31:12,081
Dude, you left your account
logged in the trailer.
742
00:31:12,081 --> 00:31:13,249
I'm a fan.
743
00:31:13,249 --> 00:31:14,250
It's just--
this is what happens.
744
00:31:14,250 --> 00:31:15,418
Of course I'm going to use it.
745
00:31:15,418 --> 00:31:17,628
You bought
112 individual episodes
746
00:31:17,628 --> 00:31:19,422
of "Everybody Loves Raymond."
That's stupid!
747
00:31:19,422 --> 00:31:20,798
Why don't you just bundle it?
748
00:31:20,798 --> 00:31:22,258
Why don't you fucking
stream it, for fuck's sake?
749
00:31:22,258 --> 00:31:24,594
It's streaming on Peacock.
It's streaming on the Cock!
750
00:31:24,594 --> 00:31:27,346
You are what we call a daddy.
751
00:31:27,346 --> 00:31:28,514
Such a daddy.
752
00:31:28,514 --> 00:31:30,016
You're crazy.
753
00:31:30,016 --> 00:31:31,309
I never do this,
754
00:31:31,309 --> 00:31:33,227
but do you think
I'd be able to get a selfie?
755
00:31:33,227 --> 00:31:34,979
- [squeals]
- Hey!
756
00:31:34,979 --> 00:31:36,814
That's my best friend!
757
00:31:36,814 --> 00:31:37,857
Oh, shit.
758
00:31:37,857 --> 00:31:38,858
[grunts]
759
00:31:38,858 --> 00:31:40,818
- [patrons gasp]
- Oh, come on.
760
00:31:43,446 --> 00:31:45,281
Oh, snap!
761
00:31:45,281 --> 00:31:48,117
That's motherfucking
Bucky Barnes!
762
00:31:48,117 --> 00:31:49,160
Winter Soldier.
763
00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:56,334
♪ ♪