1 00:00:07,141 --> 00:00:09,277 ♪ MTV ♪ 2 00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:31,699 Yeah, yeah. Uh! Yeah. 3 00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:33,767 Yeah, yeah, lockers are loud. Yeah. 4 00:00:33,767 --> 00:00:36,104 Yeah. 5 00:00:36,104 --> 00:00:39,507 Whoa, Beavis, Check out that guy. 6 00:00:40,474 --> 00:00:42,943 He's, like, sad. 7 00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:46,247 Aww. 8 00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,949 Tristan, are you okay? 9 00:00:48,949 --> 00:00:50,418 Whatever. 10 00:00:50,418 --> 00:00:52,986 Things are just so... 11 00:00:52,986 --> 00:00:54,488 you know-- 12 00:00:54,488 --> 00:00:56,557 I do. 13 00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:58,826 - Whoa. - Look at that. 14 00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:02,029 She is going to town on him. 15 00:01:02,130 --> 00:01:05,133 Yeah, take it easy. 16 00:01:05,133 --> 00:01:07,701 What's she doing that for? 17 00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:10,171 Uhh, I think maybe chicks like guys 18 00:01:10,171 --> 00:01:12,906 who have, like, emotions and stuff. 19 00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:15,243 I have emotions. 20 00:01:15,243 --> 00:01:17,878 Like, when I eat french fries, I have the emotion of, like, 21 00:01:17,878 --> 00:01:21,282 um, these french fries taste really good, you know. 22 00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:25,319 Uhh, I think they have to be, like, sad emotions. 23 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:28,689 Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's how they get you. 24 00:01:28,689 --> 00:01:30,624 Always something. 25 00:01:30,624 --> 00:01:32,160 Wait a second, Beavis. 26 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:34,995 We should, like, start being all sad. 27 00:01:34,995 --> 00:01:37,931 Then chicks will like us and then we'll score. 28 00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:40,000 Yeah, that's a great idea, Butt-Head! 29 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,536 Yes! I think we're finally gonna score-- 30 00:01:42,536 --> 00:01:44,037 Ah! 31 00:01:44,172 --> 00:01:46,707 Quit being happy, dumbass. You're gonna ruin it. 32 00:01:46,707 --> 00:01:48,176 Ohh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 33 00:01:48,176 --> 00:01:51,812 Sorry about that. Won't happen again. 34 00:01:51,812 --> 00:01:55,849 And this kind of cell division is called mitosis. 35 00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:58,319 Are there any questions? 36 00:01:58,319 --> 00:01:59,620 Butt-Head. 37 00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:01,189 Uhh-- 38 00:02:01,189 --> 00:02:03,191 I just wanna say that, like, 39 00:02:03,191 --> 00:02:08,196 what happened to that cell was, like, devadstating and stuff. 40 00:02:08,196 --> 00:02:11,064 And I'm also deverstated, and, um, 41 00:02:11,199 --> 00:02:14,067 I'm feeling emotions that are very sad. 42 00:02:14,202 --> 00:02:15,803 Yeah. 43 00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:19,072 Yeah, check it out. - Yeah, me too. 44 00:02:19,207 --> 00:02:22,410 My soul is, like, full of rain and stuff. 45 00:02:22,410 --> 00:02:24,745 Oh, my. Hmm. 46 00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:26,214 It sounds like the two of you 47 00:02:26,214 --> 00:02:28,649 may be struggling with depression. 48 00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:31,452 No, no, no. We're just really sad all the time. 49 00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:33,053 Very sad, yeah. 50 00:02:33,053 --> 00:02:35,389 Uhh-- Hey, baby. 51 00:02:35,389 --> 00:02:37,391 I, like, cry a lot. 52 00:02:37,391 --> 00:02:39,793 You know what I'm saying? 53 00:02:39,793 --> 00:02:41,929 Maybe a hug? 54 00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:44,765 Okay, I'm going to make sure 55 00:02:44,765 --> 00:02:48,236 that you boys get the help you need, mm-kay? 56 00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:51,405 These feelings of "everything sucks," 57 00:02:51,405 --> 00:02:52,773 how long have you had them? 58 00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:57,077 Uhh, since everything started to suck, I guess. 59 00:02:57,077 --> 00:02:59,012 Yeah, sorry, I couldn't hear you because, um, 60 00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:02,250 I was so busy frowning, you know. 61 00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:04,117 'Cause I'm sad. 62 00:03:04,252 --> 00:03:06,454 Feelings of hopelessness. 63 00:03:06,454 --> 00:03:09,089 Have you been sleeping more or less than usual? 64 00:03:09,089 --> 00:03:12,260 Uhh, I'm usually up all night, like, 65 00:03:12,260 --> 00:03:14,662 wiping away tears 66 00:03:14,662 --> 00:03:16,096 of sadness. 67 00:03:16,096 --> 00:03:17,865 Umm, yeah, yeah. Me too, yeah. 68 00:03:17,865 --> 00:03:20,368 I feel sad all night long. 69 00:03:20,368 --> 00:03:22,836 You know what I'm sayin'? 70 00:03:22,836 --> 00:03:25,506 Boi-oi-oi-oing. 71 00:03:25,506 --> 00:03:28,542 And have you engaged in any forms of self-harm? 72 00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:29,810 Oh, yeah, yeah. 73 00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:31,879 Yeah, I self-harm all the time, you know. 74 00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:34,181 Over in Anderson's shed, you know. 75 00:03:34,282 --> 00:03:36,149 I use hand lotion. 76 00:03:36,284 --> 00:03:37,285 Oh, no. 77 00:03:37,285 --> 00:03:38,686 Oh, no, no. It's no big deal. 78 00:03:38,686 --> 00:03:40,821 If I hear him coming, I can usually pull my pants up 79 00:03:40,821 --> 00:03:42,756 before he gets there, you know. 80 00:03:42,756 --> 00:03:45,293 He's kinda slow. 81 00:03:45,293 --> 00:03:46,860 I need to make a phone call. 82 00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:49,062 You two need more help than I can give. 83 00:03:50,431 --> 00:03:53,667 Whoa. I think she's calling in more chicks. 84 00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:55,035 Eh, she's just not woman enough 85 00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:56,537 to score with both of us, I guess. 86 00:03:57,938 --> 00:04:01,141 Sadness kicks ass. 87 00:04:08,382 --> 00:04:09,950 Um, Butt-Head, 88 00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:12,586 I thought they were taking us to score with a bunch of chicks 89 00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:14,755 We're, like, in a hospital or something. 90 00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:17,925 They said they're putting us under observation. 91 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,960 We're already getting noticed, Beavis. 92 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,529 Our plan is working. 93 00:04:21,529 --> 00:04:23,331 Oh, yeah, yeah. 94 00:04:23,331 --> 00:04:25,699 Yeah, maybe they want to observe our schlongs. 95 00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:31,138 Uhh, whoa. What's that thing? 96 00:04:31,138 --> 00:04:33,574 That's the electroshock therapy machine. 97 00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:36,477 It stimulates the brain with electric pulses. 98 00:04:37,445 --> 00:04:40,414 - Uhh, stimulate? - Yeah. 99 00:04:41,682 --> 00:04:43,351 But you don't need to worry about that. 100 00:04:43,351 --> 00:04:46,086 We only use it as a last resort for the most extreme cases. 101 00:04:46,086 --> 00:04:47,254 Yeah, we don't need that. 102 00:04:47,355 --> 00:04:48,922 We're gonna stimulate the natural way. 103 00:04:48,922 --> 00:04:50,824 Yeah. 104 00:04:50,824 --> 00:04:52,560 Now let's get you to your therapy. 105 00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:55,095 Yeah. 106 00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:58,131 All right, guys, let's give a warm welcome 107 00:04:58,131 --> 00:05:02,069 to our two newcomers, Beavis and Butt-Head. 108 00:05:02,069 --> 00:05:05,038 Did I pronounce those right? - Uhh, 109 00:05:05,038 --> 00:05:06,907 we're, like, sad 110 00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:09,009 and we're ready to score. 111 00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:10,411 You guys all look pretty sad, too, 112 00:05:10,411 --> 00:05:13,113 so, um, when do we start scoring? 113 00:05:13,113 --> 00:05:15,483 Oh, we don't keep score here, guys. 114 00:05:15,483 --> 00:05:16,550 We're here to talk 115 00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:19,520 and to listen and to share. 116 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,522 So let's begin. 117 00:05:21,522 --> 00:05:23,457 Everyone hold hands. 118 00:05:26,059 --> 00:05:28,429 Uhh, what? 119 00:05:28,429 --> 00:05:29,630 Come on. 120 00:05:31,432 --> 00:05:32,199 Uhh-- 121 00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:34,001 Hold hands, guys. 122 00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:37,438 It's okay if you two aren't ready to participate. 123 00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:39,139 No, no, we wanna participate. Yeah. 124 00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:41,174 That's the only reason we're even here. 125 00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:42,976 Well, if you wanna participate, 126 00:05:42,976 --> 00:05:45,112 then you have to hold hands. 127 00:05:49,249 --> 00:05:50,918 Close, Butt-Head. 128 00:05:50,918 --> 00:05:52,753 Try the hand. 129 00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:54,522 Really? 130 00:05:54,522 --> 00:05:55,956 Mm-hmm. 131 00:05:55,956 --> 00:05:59,159 Ehh, whatever it takes to score, I guess. 132 00:05:59,159 --> 00:06:03,063 - Okay. - Ehh, all right. 133 00:06:04,432 --> 00:06:07,100 Super. The purpose of this exercise 134 00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:09,870 is to show that-- - Uhh, this sucks. 135 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:11,338 This really sucks, Butt-Head. 136 00:06:11,439 --> 00:06:13,741 Now I really am sad. 137 00:06:13,741 --> 00:06:15,042 Yeah, yeah, me too. 138 00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:17,478 Uhh, wait a second. 139 00:06:17,478 --> 00:06:19,680 Remember that machine that guy showed us? 140 00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:21,014 Ohh, yeah, yeah. 141 00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:23,584 Yeah, the extreme stimulator machine. 142 00:06:23,584 --> 00:06:25,218 Yeah. 143 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:27,455 Let's go use that thing. 144 00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:29,457 Yeah, I'd rather fake score with a machine 145 00:06:29,457 --> 00:06:31,459 than hold hands with a real dude. 146 00:06:31,459 --> 00:06:33,461 Yeah, really. 147 00:06:33,461 --> 00:06:35,262 I'm concerned about these two new patients, 148 00:06:35,262 --> 00:06:36,697 Bailey and Beckham. 149 00:06:36,697 --> 00:06:37,898 They seem very depressed. 150 00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,167 The constant laughter 151 00:06:40,167 --> 00:06:42,870 is clearly covering up a deep pain. 152 00:06:44,605 --> 00:06:47,475 Uhh, well, it's not the kind of scoring 153 00:06:47,475 --> 00:06:49,777 I thought I was gonna get, but it's better than nothing. 154 00:06:51,178 --> 00:06:54,615 These must go here. 155 00:06:55,849 --> 00:06:58,285 Okay, Beavis, turn that knob thing. 156 00:06:58,285 --> 00:07:01,221 Okay. Yeah, yeah, cool. 157 00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,825 On three. 158 00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:06,627 Uh, one-- 159 00:07:06,627 --> 00:07:09,296 Uhh! Ahh! Ahh! 160 00:07:15,569 --> 00:07:17,337 Uh. - Whoa! 161 00:07:17,337 --> 00:07:19,406 I think you scored. Yeah. 162 00:07:19,507 --> 00:07:21,174 How was it? 163 00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:23,376 It hurt really bad. 164 00:07:23,511 --> 00:07:25,513 And I think my nads caught on fire. 165 00:07:25,513 --> 00:07:27,414 Cool! 166 00:07:27,515 --> 00:07:29,116 My turn. Yeah. 167 00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:32,119 Scoring and fire. Yeah. Whoa. 168 00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:34,321 I'll just put these in here. 169 00:07:34,321 --> 00:07:37,825 One for you, and one for you. 170 00:07:53,073 --> 00:07:54,407 Are you all right? 171 00:07:54,542 --> 00:07:55,709 Uhh-- 172 00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,778 We're not that sad anymore. 173 00:07:57,778 --> 00:08:00,247 We just need to rest. 174 00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:02,015 Ah, yeah, I was really sad, 175 00:08:02,015 --> 00:08:04,552 but now my schlong hurts, so, you know, 176 00:08:04,552 --> 00:08:06,987 I'm cheering up or something. Yeah. 177 00:08:06,987 --> 00:08:09,022 Being sad sucks. 178 00:08:17,865 --> 00:08:20,734 - Carlos, secrecy-- - Uhh, what is this show? 179 00:08:20,734 --> 00:08:22,803 What are they doing here? 180 00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:24,772 It's that show where people have, like, 181 00:08:24,772 --> 00:08:26,273 a boyfriend or a girlfriend, 182 00:08:26,273 --> 00:08:28,075 but they're afraid to tell anyone. 183 00:08:29,109 --> 00:08:32,179 I needed help because... 184 00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:34,281 I've had enough of your lies. 185 00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:37,985 Because you told me you were tall and good looking. 186 00:08:37,985 --> 00:08:40,588 Spencer, who said-- 187 00:08:40,588 --> 00:08:42,222 And Spencer told me that's not true. 188 00:08:42,222 --> 00:08:44,592 Yeah. 189 00:08:44,592 --> 00:08:46,594 'Cause he told me you were fat and short 190 00:08:46,594 --> 00:08:49,429 and had a bad beard and were really sweaty. 191 00:08:50,931 --> 00:08:52,966 Is that true? 192 00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:56,103 Who said that you actually had a vasectomy. 193 00:08:58,038 --> 00:09:01,041 It was on stage, but I know there's-- 194 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,877 Ohh, wait a minute. He had a vasectomy on stage? 195 00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:08,616 And then they threw tomatoes at him. 196 00:09:08,616 --> 00:09:10,951 Yeah, it's tough in here, I tell ya. 197 00:09:10,951 --> 00:09:14,487 Who's seen your mother sending you payments for rent. 198 00:09:14,622 --> 00:09:16,724 Let's start with the vasectomy joke. 199 00:09:16,724 --> 00:09:19,126 It's a [bleep] joke. 200 00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:21,629 I made a pun on vasectomies. I thought that was hilarious. 201 00:09:21,629 --> 00:09:23,330 He made a pun on vasectomies? 202 00:09:23,330 --> 00:09:26,934 Uhh, how would you do that? 203 00:09:26,934 --> 00:09:28,401 Yeah, I guess you could say, um, 204 00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,037 like, uh, um-- 205 00:09:30,037 --> 00:09:32,339 Oh, oh, I know! Maybe it's like, 206 00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:34,207 "Vasecto-me? 207 00:09:34,207 --> 00:09:36,476 More like vasecto-you!" Or--or something. 208 00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:41,314 He was probably like, "Knock, knock. Who's there? 209 00:09:41,314 --> 00:09:43,283 "Vasecta. 210 00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:44,952 "Vasecta who? 211 00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:48,689 "Uhh, vasecto-big fat guy with sweaty armpits 212 00:09:48,689 --> 00:09:51,925 and a bad beard." 213 00:09:53,526 --> 00:09:55,663 I host sex parties. 214 00:09:55,663 --> 00:09:58,265 Yeah. 215 00:09:58,265 --> 00:10:00,668 You have sex with other people on stage? 216 00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:02,636 - No, no. - No, no, no, 217 00:10:02,636 --> 00:10:05,505 I'm not that cool. [chuckles] 218 00:10:05,505 --> 00:10:06,874 I can show you. 219 00:10:06,874 --> 00:10:10,143 Basically, we host these parties 220 00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:13,346 where we sell sex toys. 221 00:10:13,346 --> 00:10:16,650 Nipple clamps, dildoes. 222 00:10:16,650 --> 00:10:18,952 He's like, "Okay, okay. 223 00:10:18,952 --> 00:10:20,553 "I'm sorry I didn't tell you 224 00:10:20,553 --> 00:10:22,856 I'm the king of discount butt plugs." 225 00:10:22,856 --> 00:10:24,057 Yeah. 226 00:10:24,057 --> 00:10:25,759 Yeah, gotta make a living somehow. 227 00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:29,096 My comedy sucks. 228 00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:32,299 And I'm unattractive. 229 00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:34,501 My parents know about this. 230 00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:36,536 Here's a video right here. 231 00:10:36,536 --> 00:10:38,371 Uh, I'm confused, Butt-Head. 232 00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:40,173 So he's having sex parties 233 00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:43,243 and selling nipple clamps and butt plugs, 234 00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:45,412 and that's why he doesn't want her 235 00:10:45,412 --> 00:10:46,680 to meet his parents? 236 00:10:48,816 --> 00:10:51,919 His parents are proud of him. 237 00:10:51,919 --> 00:10:55,255 He comes from a long line of butt plug salesmen. 238 00:10:57,324 --> 00:10:59,927 Including my great- great-great grandfather, 239 00:10:59,927 --> 00:11:04,965 Alexander Buttploog. 240 00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:06,800 He came over from the old country. 241 00:11:08,736 --> 00:11:10,904 Old Buttploogia. 242 00:11:10,904 --> 00:11:12,605 Bad, bad boy. 243 00:11:12,740 --> 00:11:15,475 When he came here, he didn't have a dildo in his pocket. 244 00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:20,748 Just a butt plug and a dream. 245 00:11:20,748 --> 00:11:24,151 And it wasn't in his pocket. 246 00:11:25,819 --> 00:11:27,420 She's like, "Can we just address 247 00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:29,322 "the elephant in the room here? 248 00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:32,760 What's up with your sweaty, disgusting armpits?" 249 00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:34,361 Yeah, yeah. 250 00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:36,830 Yeah, you've been sneaking around selling butt plugs 251 00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:39,066 when you should be, like, sneaking around 252 00:11:39,066 --> 00:11:41,434 selling anti-perspirants or something. 253 00:11:42,970 --> 00:11:44,905 For four years, you've dodged me 254 00:11:44,905 --> 00:11:46,907 meeting your parents, meeting your friends, 255 00:11:46,907 --> 00:11:48,108 going to half your comedy shows. 256 00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:49,642 'Cause they all know about this stuff. 257 00:11:49,777 --> 00:11:51,444 Okay, okay, but, um, 258 00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:53,313 I still don't completely understand. 259 00:11:53,313 --> 00:11:55,382 So, like, um-- so he's like, 260 00:11:55,382 --> 00:11:57,150 "I don't want you to meet my parents 261 00:11:57,150 --> 00:12:00,921 "until I tell you that I sell butt plugs. 262 00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:03,090 Then it'll be okay." 263 00:12:03,090 --> 00:12:04,825 His parents were probably like, 264 00:12:04,825 --> 00:12:06,526 "So you want us to meet your girlfriend? 265 00:12:06,526 --> 00:12:08,461 Well, how many butt plugs did she buy?" 266 00:12:09,629 --> 00:12:11,564 "Wait, none? 267 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:14,868 "Well, then what's in her butt right now? Nothing? 268 00:12:14,868 --> 00:12:17,037 I don't wanna meet her. Forget it. No." 269 00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:20,007 Gonna have to figure out a way to talk about this. 270 00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,811 But I can't imagine losing you. 271 00:12:26,046 --> 00:12:29,182 - What? - Yeah. I sure can. 272 00:12:29,182 --> 00:12:31,251 And I'm hopeful for you both. 273 00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,887 Will you make me the luckiest man in the world 274 00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:35,989 and take my discount butt plug? 275 00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:41,829 You are one of us now. 276 00:12:41,829 --> 00:12:43,296 We're not losing a son, 277 00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:44,932 you're gaining a butt plug. 278 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,236 It belonged to Carlos' grandmother 279 00:12:49,236 --> 00:12:51,071 until about ten minutes ago. 280 00:12:51,071 --> 00:12:53,540 But we want you to have it. 281 00:12:55,675 --> 00:12:58,445 Yeah, yeah, you might wanna wash it first. 282 00:12:58,445 --> 00:13:01,081 And don't worry, that dog won't poop in the house. 283 00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:04,284 Yeah, we've seen to that.