[Gomez] It's really weird. I don't live a normal life.
I do normal things.
I'm very normal, but I don't live a normal life.
Selena Gomez is the most followed person on Instagram.
[reporter 1] Time magazine's 100 most influential people in the world.
[reporter 2] Selena Gomez was presented
with the Billboard Woman of the Year award.
-That's pretty cool. How does that feel? -It's incredible.
Having all of the success early on was a lot,
but I started to recognize that with the platform that I had been given,
I was able to shift that light into what I really care about.
-[writer 1] Dear Selena… -Dear Selena…
You extended your platform
to lift up the voices of Black leaders engaged in social justice work.
By sharing your story,
you've given millions of people hope of recovery.
Definitely believe I'm here for a reason that's much bigger than myself.
Thank you for helping to give me a voice that I can lend to others.
[writer 2] Your courage inspired me to do something too.
[Gomez] I'm here to experience life, to share that life
and hopefully allow people to believe in something bigger
and hopefully make them feel loved.
[writer 3] Dear Selena…
[Gomez] As a kid, I always was like, "There's more."
I kept saying, "There's definitely more and I want to see it and I wanna do it."
Growing up in Texas, my mom would take me to museums and plays.
And she just had this effortless imagination,
and she wanted me to have that growing up.
And I am grateful for that, because now my whole life is make-believe.
As a kid, I loved acting.
I kind of look at my older stuff and just laugh,
'cause I was just a kid trying, you know?
I got majorly made fun of, 'cause how could you not?
I'm rubber, you're glue. Take her smell and put it on you.
It was a huge part of my life that shaped me.
It was just so pure.
I'm home.
And I learned so much.
All the good and the bad that came with it.
Because during that time,
there became this, uh, interest in my life that I wasn't pretty stoked about.
-[security] Give us room to walk, please. -[paparazzi clamoring]
The media and the press just started getting overwhelming.
There would be photographers that would show up on set,
and I-I would get very nervous.
I was very anxious experiencing that for the first time.
I didn't wanna be a headline.
Is it hard being under the spotlight the way you are?
Everything in your life, your social life, uh,
where you go, what you're doing.
-You're always being watched. -Yeah. It's a little frustrating at times.
[Gomez] This turn happened
and people started using my personal life a lot more.
And it took me years to kind of shift that light
back into what I really care about.
[crowd cheering]
I think, when you sign up for Disney,
you are acknowledging that you are a role model for children.
I was a bit-- I don't want to say controlled.
But monitored, if you will, with the material that I had.
And I was very limited.
[gasps] You look just like her.
But then, you know, I got older.
So naturally, I wanted to-- to become older.
Give it to me. Stop!
But I lived with the thought of
"I'm gonna lose everything if I said this or did this.
Nobody would view me the same way."
But also, at the same time, if I was gonna grow as an artist,
I had to make those decisions.
♪ 'Cause I just wanna look good for you Good for you ♪
I released Revival, which was my first record with Interscope.
♪ Let me show you how proud I am To be yours ♪
I called the album Revival because I was in a revival.
♪Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh ♪
♪ Can't keep my hands to myself ♪
I felt like, "Okay, wow. I can actually say these things,
and it's okay now. So I'm gonna just talk about it."
-[doorbell rings] -♪ I want you all to myself ♪
It was that turning point of, "We actually hear her as a woman.
A young woman who's growing into her own,
who is no longer this, like, little girl."
♪ All of the downs and the uppers Keep making love to each other ♪
It was my first time being sassy and sexy.
It helped me grow. It helped me be seen in a different light.
So Revival was me feeling this sense of power
over myself.
And the American Music Award goes to…
-Selena Gomez! -[audience cheering]
The iHeartRadio Music Award goes to…
Selena Gomez.
I was having all of this success, but I wasn't okay.
I didn't know why,
but I knew that I felt things much more intensely than other people.
-Do you feel like you got caught up in-- -[Gomez] No.
It was me almost feeling guilty about fame.
'Cause people can see anyone in my position and just say,
"Wow, they have it all figured out. They get to live this cool life."
So privately, it's a whole different feeling?
[Gomez] Yes. You're isolated. You're--
You're being looked at. You're being judged.
There's not a worse feeling in the world.
And I learned mental health is just as important as physical health.
That has allowed me to have an immense amount of empathy
and compassion for people who are hurting.
Because I know a little bit of that, and I know what that feels like.
People do say that music is the universal language.
As far as language barriers, they almost don't exist.
So it's a huge, huge connection and lifeline
to me and the people that I love.
Dear Selena,
I'm in Bogotá, Colombia, the city where I was born.
[together] "I'm from a very close Latina family.
I had a great childhood."
But when I was in high school, I started to get sick.
[school bell rings]
[writer 1] Dear Selena, I'm from Sayville, New York.
Growing up there was stifling.
Somehow, I became the kid that everyone bullied from a very young age.
[together] "So young that I can't even remember when it started."
Being fearful about what's going to happen next,
who's going to hurt you, became years of my life.
Finally, in ninth grade, I started therapy.
My doctor said to me, "You know, you have an anxiety disorder."
[writer 3] I remember my mom and I driving all over the city
to different doctors and homeopaths to try and figure out what was wrong.
But even after my diagnosis of depression,
my mom would still only call it "deep sadness,"
because no one wants to talk about these things in Colombia.
[writer 1] My family has always been very supportive,
but it's hard for people who don't struggle with these issues
to really understand them.
They don't know what it's like to feel like you can't breathe
and the walls are closing in around you when you're having a panic attack.
[writer 3] A few years later, I had to come home from college.
[together] "I just went into this deep, terrible hole."
I couldn't do anything by myself.
I couldn't sleep alone.
I couldn't go to the bathroom alone.
I couldn't drive.
I had to have at-home psychiatry treatment because I couldn't even leave my house.
Later that same year, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis.
My body became another enemy of my mind.
That was my breaking point.
I attempted suicide.
[writer 1] I went to college at Virginia Tech, which is a huge school.
35,000 people.
It was really crazy to be this kid from a small town
among all of these people,
and sometimes I'd get anxious.
I'd always been a fan of yours.
So whenever I'd feel that anxiety coming on,
I'd put on your album, Revival,
and it would always make me feel better.
-[audience cheering] -Selena Gomez!
Then I saw your acceptance speech at the American Music Awards.
I had everything, and I was absolutely broken inside.
You talked about your own struggles with mental health,
-and you said… -[together] "If you are broken…"
…you do not have to stay broken.
[cheering]
Mind blown.
Here you were, this hugely famous person,
saying, "I went through this and came out whole on the other side."
[together] "I felt like your words perfectly summed up my feelings."
It made me think I want to do more.
[writer 3] Selena, you were so transparent about your journey.
It was a conversation starter.
It helped a lot.
And it got me thinking.
I wanted to do something to make people in Colombia realize
that therapy is not something to be ashamed of.
I started writing about my issues and publishing articles online
as a way to heal myself and find some order in the chaos.
My senior year, I ran for the homecoming court.
Everyone is required to run on a platform, and I chose suicide prevention.
I had to walk out in front of 60,000 people
and have my name announced in conjunction with suicide prevention.
[announcer] And Jake Vail…
-[cheering] -…escorted by Faye Vail.
[Jake] Me, the shy boy with the anxiety disorder.
But, Selena, your willingness to risk judgment
in talking about treatment was a guiding light
in my willingness to risk being flooded with crippling anxiety
to help fellow sufferers.
[together] "It was time to not let fear rule my life."
[writer 3] I feel seen by the world again.
Like I'm not hiding behind a mental illness diagnosis.
Now I'm a psychologist myself and a passionate mental health activist.
I'm in grad school where I'm continuing to advocate for mental health.
I'm able to spread your message now.
I have friends from all over the world.
I am so grateful to you, Selena,
for giving me and the world hope by sharing your struggles.
Selena, thank you for showing people that recovery is possible
and that help is available if you want to reach for it.
I love this.
I went to an eye appointment when I was younger,
and when you go to the doctor,
they always check your blood pressure, temperature, all that.
And my blood pressure was 155 over 100,
and they said, "This actually requires you to go to the emergency room."
They run a few tests on me.
I had to stay there overnight.
And all of that ended up coming down to I have lupus.
I didn't quite understand what that meant.
I know I had an autoimmune disease.
It was just my body fighting itself on the inside.
How you guys doing?
[cheering]
And that was the most surreal part because, well, I had never felt fatigue.
I was young. I felt completely fine.
♪ And it's not even my birthday ♪
So, hearing from a doctor that, "Oh, you know,
you could have had a stroke on stage. You could have died."
It was a lot, but I didn't allow it to sink in.
I didn't want to process it.
My weight would constantly fluctuate 'cause I would be on certain medications.
And obviously people just ran with it.
It was like they couldn't wait to find a thing to bring me down.
I was being shamed for gaining weight because of my lupus.
I lied. I would go online, and I would post a picture of myself,
and I would say "It doesn't matter."
"I'm not accepting what you're saying."
All the while being in the room, posting that,
crying my eyes out because nobody deserves to hear those things.
Though I was posting these things saying, "It doesn't bother me,"
because I didn't want it to bother other people
who are experiencing the same thing.
Getting shamed for what they look like, who they are, who they love.
I just think it's so unfair.
I don't think that anybody deserves to feel less than.
[photographers clamoring] Selena. Turn your head, Selena.
[Gomez] In my early 20s, my lupus got really bad,
and it was now attacking my kidneys intensely.
It was scary, 'cause then it was,
"Okay, well, now you have to have a kidney transplant."
I was terrified for my life completely.
I know that there's crazy waiting lists.
I know that it's an insane process.
I-- I know that that would require so much from me
that I wasn't sure I was prepared to do.
One day, she came home and just started crying.
And I said, "What's wrong?"
And that's when she told me.
And she goes, "I don't know what to do. The list is seven to ten years long."
And it just vomited out of me. I was like, "Of course I'll get tested."
My best friend, her name is Francia.
She said, "No, I'm absolutely getting tested."
So within three days, she went to go do it, and she was a match.
And it was one of those moments where I felt watched over.
I know I was so, so, so lucky.
I understand that that doesn't happen for a lot of people,
and I know the outcome of some of those situations and how serious they are.
So I do not take it lightly that it's happened to me that way.
-[crowd applauding] -To be honest,
I think Francia should be getting this award…
[inhales shakily] …um, 'cause she saved my life. [sniffles]
Sorry.
[crowd cheering]
I will never ever, ever be more in debt to a person than Francia.
The idea of someone not even second-guessing to be a donor
was unbelievably overwhelming.
I got a tattoo with her actually.
And it is the date we did the kidney transplant.
I think it had to happen the way that it did
in order for me to get to where I am.
I was meant to go through it to do something for others.
Dear Selena,
We have a bond that runs deep in our veins.
[together] "I'm from Texas like you, Selena."
And I just moved to Southern California with my new husband and young daughter
about 20 years ago to teach ESL, math and science to international students.
My life felt complete, but then it took a sharp left turn.
I started experiencing strange symptoms.
I was disoriented, couldn't think straight.
My hair was falling out.
I suddenly gained all this weight.
Time went on, and nothing got better.
Fortunately for me, I studied biology,
so I knew enough to start doing my own research.
Looking at all my symptoms, comparing them to my findings,
I demanded to see a rheumatologist.
Now, Selena, I don't know how you felt when you received the diagnosis.
I was relieved.
[together] "At least my condition had a name."
Lupus.
Lupus is the invisible disease.
We don't look like there's anything wrong with us.
We look normal, cute, fabulous even.
I mean, look at you on the red carpet.
I'm sure you heard things like,
[together] "'Is she really sick? She looks fine to me.'
And we are."
Until we're not.
I had a flare-up that led to six months in the ICU.
Because my lupus is systemic, it attacked my kidneys.
I spent nine years on dialysis.
That leads me to the second biggest thing you and I have in common, Selena.
We both have had a kidney transplant.
Wow.
You being vocal about the disease is so important.
As you know, the Latino and Black communities are hit the hardest.
It's so important that we have the information we need
to get people the care they deserve.
So now, I work for the Lupus Foundation of America.
One of my favorite events we host is the annual gala called An Evening of Hope.
It gives our lupus community the support I wished I had when I was first diagnosed.
[together] "It's the hottest party of the year.
Like you…"
I've become a face for lupus.
I was part of the first national ad campaign
to bring awareness to our disease.
But we know that what we're doing is so much bigger than us.
Thank you for speaking out about our condition, Selena.
Lupus is a ferocious enemy,
but I'm honored to join you in the fight.
Wow. That's not what I was expecting.
That's amazing, Wendy.
I don't know what to say. Thank you.
♪ Baby, baby You've been so distant… ♪
I'm very vulnerable. I'm very emotional.
Songwriting can bring up so many different feelings.
It is cathartic. It is something that I almost have to do.
It's a way of expression.
♪ Saw us getting older, older Burning toast in the toaster ♪
So even if I'm doing an upbeat song,
there tends to be a little bit of darkness in it.
And I'm okay with that.
I like that there is this substance to my music where people are wondering,
"Okay, well what's that about?"
And then having them figure it out.
Surprisingly, they're usually right.
Hey, um, I wanted to take time to do a quick message for you guys,
um, because I haven't been posting that much.
I have a very big love-hate relationship with social media.
But during this past election,
I couldn't have been happier to have my platform.
[protesters] No justice, no peace!
No justice, no peace!
A lot of interesting things started happening in the world and in our country.
And it was repulsive. It was dangerous.
It was very alarming, and it had a lot to do with color.
I needed to know how I could fix anything.
But those voices that needed to be heard wasn't mine.
But I had this space.
My name is Ruby Bridges,
and I just want to take a moment to thank Selena
for this amazing opportunity to speak to you directly.
So, I decided to hand my platform over
to people that have walked that life,
that do know.
We believe that papers don't determine your humanity
and that race doesn't determine your value.
And I couldn't have been more happy about it,
because I was able to learn.
That, to me, made me more excited to fight for what I believed in.
Dear Selena,
You know that I have been an activist
fighting in the name of the dignity and honor of Black transgender people
throughout my career.
Fresh out of college, I was a reporter for a small newspaper
in my home state of Georgia.
As you can imagine, back then, there was little space for me to show up
in all of my glory and authenticity as a trans person.
[together] "Transgender people are still so deeply discriminated against
in our society."
Our experiences are diminished in the workplace,
and schools, and government,
and even in our own homes and communities.
I knew I had to advocate for and be in service to the trans community.
So, I began to work with community organizers in Atlanta.
I became a national organizer for the Transgender Law Center,
which is the country's largest trans-led organization.
In 2018, I became executive editor of Out magazine,
[together] "…where I was the first trans person
in a leadership role at the publication."
[Willis] I was so glad to be able to expand the narrative of our community.
Selena, I have always felt that you were such a bright light.
Before most people were sharing the mic as a part of a trend,
you extended your platform to lift up the voice
of the Black leaders engaged in social justice work.
-[protester] Whose streets? Whose streets? -[protesters] Our streets! Our streets!
[Willis] For Black trans people,
not only are we facing the constant threat of state violence,
but also violence and discrimination in our own communities.
On June 13th of 2020,
you gave me the opportunity to take over your Instagram.
Now, I knew this was no small feat.
After all, you have a massive global audience
with one of the largest followings ever on Instagram.
I was able to share the history of Black trans activists
like Marsha P. Johnson and Miss Major.
I was able to share a resource list that was compiled by community members
of other Black trans leaders and organizations.
[together] "It wasn't just an elevation of me.
It was an elevation of our movement."
In the wake of taking over your IG,
I was able to use my expanded platform
to support the organizing efforts of a historical march here in Brooklyn.
[protesters] Justice! Now!
[Willis] We called it Brooklyn Liberation,
and it was focused on honoring the lives of Black trans people that we've lost.
I believe in your power.
[protesters] I believe in your power.
-I believe in our power. -[protesters] I believe…
[Willis] It was the first time there was ever that large of a crowd.
15,000 people specifically gathered for Black trans folks.
I believe in Black trans power.
[protesters] I believe in Black trans power.
[protesters cheering, applauding]
It was an unprecedented moment
that I will never forget for the rest of my life.
[together] "Liberating Black trans people liberates everybody."
Selena, thank you for modeling what it means to be a leader
and springing into action in a moment when Black trans folks needed you most.
[protesters] Till we win. Till we win.
Look, we're matching.
You know, I'd never wanted to be this untouchable thing.
My mom had always taught me that there's no one bigger,
there's no one better, there's no one worse.
It's all the same, but we all just grew up differently.
That's how I view my life.
That's why my meet-and-greets are meant to be an hour and a half,
but usually are three hours long.
And I'm not saying that as a lie. You could actually find that out.
It's because I can have these conversations with my fans
that I don't think I would be able to have
if I was just this perfect, put-together person.
And it's not just fans. It's people.
And I have a heart for people.
Selena, without your example,
I wouldn't have had the tools I needed to speak out about this.
I thank you deeply for making the struggles of many of us
who feel like our bodies and our minds are beyond our control visible.
Love, Raquel.
Sincerely, Wendy.
Sending you much love, Mariana.
With admiration, Jake.
I just use everything that I have and do goodness with what I have.
That's the part that I've found real joy in.