1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,630 ♪ I'm a fool to do your dirty work ♪ 2 00:00:04,630 --> 00:00:06,510 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 3 00:00:07,466 --> 00:00:11,136 ♪ I don't wanna do your dirty work ♪ 4 00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:13,006 ♪ No more ♪ 5 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,644 [phone chimes] 6 00:00:19,186 --> 00:00:20,476 WOMAN 1: Dear Sugar. 7 00:00:20,479 --> 00:00:22,359 I'm supposed to be getting married in a month. 8 00:00:22,898 --> 00:00:25,068 My fiancé is amazing, 9 00:00:25,067 --> 00:00:26,527 but I don't wanna go through with it. 10 00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:27,527 WOMAN 2: Dear Sugar. 11 00:00:27,528 --> 00:00:29,318 My wife and I just bought our first house, 12 00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:30,741 and I know I should be happy. 13 00:00:30,739 --> 00:00:32,279 But after she goes to work, 14 00:00:32,281 --> 00:00:34,701 I just sit in it and cry. 15 00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:35,911 WOMAN 3: Dear Sugar. 16 00:00:35,911 --> 00:00:37,961 I've been a good wife for 25 years. 17 00:00:37,955 --> 00:00:41,075 But for 25 of those years, I'd wanted to leave. 18 00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:43,248 WOMAN 1: What do I do? WOMAN 2: When is it okay to go? 19 00:00:43,252 --> 00:00:44,592 WOMAN 3: Do you think I should stay? 20 00:00:45,254 --> 00:00:46,264 DANNY: What are you reading? 21 00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,470 Uh, nothing. 22 00:01:02,813 --> 00:01:04,653 How about five stars this time? 23 00:01:04,648 --> 00:01:06,478 How about you go fuck yourself? 24 00:01:12,948 --> 00:01:13,948 Dear Sugar. 25 00:01:16,326 --> 00:01:18,036 I'm a messed-up woman. 26 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,752 I've been married twice. 27 00:01:21,999 --> 00:01:23,169 I'm dishonest, 28 00:01:24,126 --> 00:01:25,126 impulsive, 29 00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:27,378 unhappy, 30 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:29,755 jealous, 31 00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,050 and lonely. 32 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,600 [waterbed sloshing] 33 00:01:36,180 --> 00:01:39,890 And I have no right to give advice 34 00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:41,811 to anyone. 35 00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,190 [water draining] 36 00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:46,574 [sighs] 37 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:53,664 [knock on door] 38 00:01:54,740 --> 00:01:55,740 [door opens] 39 00:01:59,286 --> 00:02:01,076 RAE: Um, guys? 40 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:07,292 - Oh! Hey. Hey. - Shit. [clears throat] Hey, Rae. 41 00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:09,795 RAE: Here. 42 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:13,840 It's from Uncle Lucas. He paid you back. 43 00:02:17,596 --> 00:02:19,806 So now you guys can stop fighting. 44 00:02:19,806 --> 00:02:21,846 Or maybe you already have. 45 00:02:27,814 --> 00:02:29,404 Okay, I can't get anything else out of her, 46 00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:30,939 but something's off. 47 00:02:30,943 --> 00:02:34,243 Why the hell would Lucas trust a friend to drop off 15 grand? 48 00:02:34,238 --> 00:02:35,528 Have you seen my Hayes letter? 49 00:02:35,531 --> 00:02:37,071 I... I keep it in a book, 50 00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:38,874 - and now I can't find the book. - No. 51 00:02:38,867 --> 00:02:40,237 I need it for the retreat. 52 00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:41,754 And now Rae's acting all cagey. 53 00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:44,082 Wait. I found it. Ah! Good. 54 00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,708 Hey, I want to know who the hell was at my house last night. 55 00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:49,288 - Don't you? - Danny. Lucas paid us back. 56 00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:50,464 Rae's not screaming at me. 57 00:02:50,462 --> 00:02:52,762 We had sex for the first time in months! 58 00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:55,296 Everything is good! Things are good! 59 00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:58,506 What was up with that Uber driver last night? 60 00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,057 [car honking] 61 00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:05,845 Oh. That's... That's Amy. 62 00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:09,023 So I will see you tomorrow night. 63 00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,022 So you're leaving? 64 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:11,193 Right now? In the middle of this? 65 00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:13,859 In the middle of what? 66 00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:17,282 Danny, there is no middle. There is no "this." 67 00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,617 Hey, everything is good. 68 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:22,868 Okay? 69 00:03:22,870 --> 00:03:23,870 It's good. 70 00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,293 Sorry. Hi. AMY: Mama, hustle! 71 00:03:27,291 --> 00:03:29,251 What... Were you looking for that Hayes letter? 72 00:03:29,251 --> 00:03:31,961 - Hi. - Hi. Hi. Hi. 73 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:35,966 Okay. So I got jerky. 74 00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:38,386 - I got CBD lollies. - Whoo! 75 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:39,965 Oh, my God, what's wrong? 76 00:03:40,804 --> 00:03:42,514 Nothing. Everything. I don't know. 77 00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,466 - Let's just go. - Okay. 78 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,478 ♪ Even The Losers by Tom Petty playing ♪ 79 00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:50,397 [women singing along] ♪ Baby, even the losers ♪ 80 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:54,775 ♪ Get lucky sometimes ♪ 81 00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:56,196 ♪ Oh-ho! ♪ 82 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:59,660 I never want to see another blue book in my life! 83 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,066 At least until next quarter. 84 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,334 - Oh, we should celebrate. - Yes! 85 00:04:03,327 --> 00:04:04,487 Let's drive to Mexico. 86 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:06,084 Well, that's kind of far. 87 00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:07,749 Come on, Mom. It's spring break. 88 00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:10,418 Would you settle for Dairy Queen on Route 4? 89 00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:14,545 How about this? 90 00:04:15,130 --> 00:04:16,380 We will save up, 91 00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:18,221 and then spring break, senior year, 92 00:04:18,217 --> 00:04:19,467 we'll go somewhere great. 93 00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:20,801 Yeah! 94 00:04:21,678 --> 00:04:23,468 Yeah, okay. Uh, we've got... 95 00:04:23,472 --> 00:04:25,182 - We've got two years to save. - Mm-hmm. 96 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,099 Where should we go? 97 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,191 Machu Picchu is supposed to be incredible. 98 00:04:30,187 --> 00:04:31,557 The Inca Trail? 99 00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:34,573 I was thinking less hiking, more margaritas. 100 00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:35,606 [thudding] 101 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,569 [metal clanking] 102 00:04:43,742 --> 00:04:45,372 Hey, wh... what are you doing? 103 00:04:45,369 --> 00:04:46,369 Documenting. 104 00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:47,957 Okay. Uh, well, 105 00:04:48,580 --> 00:04:49,580 I'm Jess. 106 00:04:49,581 --> 00:04:51,751 Uh, well, you're a terrible driver, Jess. 107 00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:54,090 Huh! Uh, I wasn't... I wasn't driving. 108 00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:57,376 Right. You were just sitting there, not moving. 109 00:04:57,381 --> 00:04:59,841 I mean, who's gonna pay for this? JESS: Well, you were driving. 110 00:04:59,842 --> 00:05:01,842 Honey, it was our fault. 111 00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:04,261 No, no, Mom. 112 00:05:04,263 --> 00:05:07,683 It's gonna take us both working doubles to cover this. 113 00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,102 We're never gonna make it to Mexico! 114 00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:13,692 Uh, well... You know what? My father knows a guy, a mechanic. 115 00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:15,769 You wanna... give me your number? 116 00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:16,784 I can see if he could... 117 00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:19,242 I don't know, like, hook you up or something. 118 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:26,410 You know, why not? Worth a shot. 119 00:05:28,579 --> 00:05:29,579 Yep. 120 00:05:33,292 --> 00:05:36,212 Unless this is just some ploy to... get my number. 121 00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:37,551 No. No way. 122 00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:40,216 It's the mechanic. Uh... So I'm gonna get you a mechanic. 123 00:05:44,261 --> 00:05:45,551 - Cool. - Yep. 124 00:05:45,971 --> 00:05:48,931 [exhales] This writer's retreat is the best birthday present 125 00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:50,522 that anyone has ever given me. 126 00:05:50,517 --> 00:05:56,057 Aw! Well, you only have two sad little days left of your 40s. 127 00:05:56,064 --> 00:05:58,734 - Oh, my God. - So you gotta go big or go home. 128 00:06:00,152 --> 00:06:02,032 - That's what they say. - Oh, God. 129 00:06:02,029 --> 00:06:05,699 "Legendary British author Hayes MacKeown 130 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:09,079 "leads this penetrating workshop 131 00:06:09,912 --> 00:06:14,372 featuring a master craftsman working at the height of his powers." 132 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,594 Oh, "height of his powers"? Jesus! 133 00:06:16,585 --> 00:06:18,205 Like, they'd ever say that about a woman. 134 00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:21,922 Hey. So I have some news. 135 00:06:22,508 --> 00:06:23,428 What? 136 00:06:23,425 --> 00:06:27,345 Uh... Okay, I heard from my agents. Finally. 137 00:06:27,346 --> 00:06:29,256 Okay. Okay. I'm so sorry. 138 00:06:29,264 --> 00:06:33,064 And Random House is making an offer which... 139 00:06:33,060 --> 00:06:34,060 Oh, my God. 140 00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:37,944 - Wait! Oh, my God! - Right? 141 00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:39,940 - Oh, my God! - It's not even that much money but it... 142 00:06:39,942 --> 00:06:41,032 CLARE: Who cares? I mean... 143 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:42,186 It doesn't matter about the money. 144 00:06:42,194 --> 00:06:43,324 - It's just like... - Yeah. 145 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:46,030 Out of curiosity, just how... I mean, I wonder how much... 146 00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:48,831 Like, I think they said 85K. 147 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:51,325 - $85,000? - Yeah. But, uh... 148 00:06:51,328 --> 00:06:53,658 - Holy shit, Amy! - I know. 149 00:06:53,664 --> 00:06:55,044 And guess what? CLARE: What? 150 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:57,130 I guess there's some interest in the screen rights. 151 00:06:57,125 --> 00:06:59,495 - Wow! - I know! What! 152 00:06:59,503 --> 00:07:04,173 Wow! Oh, my God. Wow. I am... Whoa! 153 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,758 Oh, my God. This place! 154 00:07:11,765 --> 00:07:13,595 Not. Too. Shabby. 155 00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:16,942 Thank God they do a sliding scale, right? 156 00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:18,517 [Amy laughing] 157 00:07:18,522 --> 00:07:20,942 Amy? Amy! AMY: Oh, my God. 158 00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:22,441 I just heard the news! 159 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:26,412 [both squealing, laughing] 160 00:07:26,405 --> 00:07:30,195 Shut up, shut up, shut up! You are a goddamn goddess. 161 00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:34,196 I'll just... I'll just sign us... Or, you know, check us in. 162 00:07:36,665 --> 00:07:38,165 I am so excited for you. 163 00:07:42,421 --> 00:07:43,421 - CLARE: Hi. - Hi. 164 00:07:43,422 --> 00:07:47,012 I'm just here to, uh, check in Clare Pierce and Amy Adler. 165 00:07:47,009 --> 00:07:48,139 Yes. 166 00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:52,505 You're in "The Empty Chair: Writing About Abandonment." 167 00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:54,223 Yay! 168 00:07:54,224 --> 00:07:55,314 CLARE: Uh, no, no, no. 169 00:07:55,309 --> 00:07:58,689 We're in Hayes MacKeown, "The Story Within." 170 00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:00,901 You're definitely "Abandonment." 171 00:08:00,898 --> 00:08:03,228 No, we're literally here for Hayes... 172 00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,153 But you're literally in "The Empty Chair." 173 00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:07,492 Yeah. "Empty Chair," yeah. No, that's us. Yeah. 174 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,407 Like I said. Let me get your welcome packets. 175 00:08:09,406 --> 00:08:10,656 Mm. Thank you. 176 00:08:12,201 --> 00:08:13,451 [clears throat] Can I see this? 177 00:08:13,452 --> 00:08:16,912 - Why are... - So, okay, there's a, um, thing 178 00:08:16,914 --> 00:08:19,834 which is that the Hayes' workshop sold out in, like, two seconds. 179 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,503 So, um, there's a loophole, 180 00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:23,422 which is that we take the Abandonment workshop, 181 00:08:23,420 --> 00:08:25,260 we say we hate it, and then we switch. 182 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:28,085 We're gonna abandon the Abandonment workshop? 183 00:08:28,091 --> 00:08:29,471 Mm-hmm. Yeah. 184 00:08:29,468 --> 00:08:30,718 MAN: So, Clare, what'll it be? 185 00:08:30,719 --> 00:08:31,799 Sancerre or Rhône? 186 00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:34,723 Um... red. Red's... red's fine. 187 00:08:34,723 --> 00:08:36,683 Did you hear that, Joan? We have another hot earther. 188 00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,853 I hope you like beef bourguignon, Clare. 189 00:08:38,852 --> 00:08:39,852 It's good. 190 00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:44,404 I... I love your paintings. 191 00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:47,736 When we were in grad school, 192 00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:50,696 we decided we would buy one piece of art a year. 193 00:08:50,697 --> 00:08:52,317 Art being very loosely defined. 194 00:08:52,324 --> 00:08:54,244 Uh, Clare's mom is something of an artist. 195 00:08:54,243 --> 00:08:55,833 CLARE: Mm. No, not... not like this. 196 00:08:55,827 --> 00:08:59,827 Come on, I mean, everything Clare has is practically handmade by her. 197 00:08:59,831 --> 00:09:01,501 I mean, she basically built your house. 198 00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:02,500 Is she an architect? 199 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,090 No, she's a waitress. 200 00:09:05,420 --> 00:09:06,710 I waited tables in college. 201 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:09,133 I think it's something everyone should do once in their life, don't you? 202 00:09:09,633 --> 00:09:11,553 She's in college too, actually. 203 00:09:12,511 --> 00:09:13,511 With me. 204 00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:15,352 - JOAN: Oh, you're kidding. - Good for her. 205 00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:17,517 That's... It... It's never too late, right? 206 00:09:17,516 --> 00:09:18,766 I wanted to be Ruth Ginsburg. 207 00:09:19,268 --> 00:09:21,268 Jess, what if I came to law school with you next year? 208 00:09:21,270 --> 00:09:23,060 Would you die? [laughs] 209 00:09:26,984 --> 00:09:28,244 Well, actually, I was, uh... 210 00:09:28,944 --> 00:09:30,654 I was thinking... Well, we were thinking... 211 00:09:31,572 --> 00:09:34,412 that I might, uh, defer a year 212 00:09:34,408 --> 00:09:35,698 to do some traveling abroad. 213 00:09:37,661 --> 00:09:38,661 I'm sorry? 214 00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:40,962 Clare's applying to a semester in Dublin, 215 00:09:40,956 --> 00:09:42,246 so we... we thought it might be fun 216 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,129 if we both stayed on a bit longer, right? Yeah. 217 00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:46,752 Huh. 218 00:09:47,713 --> 00:09:48,713 I'm just gonna use the, 219 00:09:49,256 --> 00:09:52,086 uh, bathroom. JESS: Oh, the bathroom? It's... Just go out to the left. 220 00:09:52,092 --> 00:09:53,932 Welcome, writers. 221 00:09:57,097 --> 00:09:58,467 Take a look at this chair. 222 00:09:58,473 --> 00:10:00,393 [softly] Wow, they really took this whole 223 00:10:00,392 --> 00:10:01,772 empty-chair thing very literally. 224 00:10:01,768 --> 00:10:03,228 WOMAN: How does it make you feel? 225 00:10:05,981 --> 00:10:09,321 What memories does it call up in you? 226 00:10:10,694 --> 00:10:12,324 In this writing workshop, 227 00:10:12,321 --> 00:10:14,321 we'll explore abandonment 228 00:10:14,323 --> 00:10:17,743 as it relates to ourselves and our characters. 229 00:10:17,743 --> 00:10:19,203 And we'll do it safely, 230 00:10:20,204 --> 00:10:21,374 in a circle of trust. 231 00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:23,291 [softly] We're just gonna stay for one minute, 232 00:10:23,290 --> 00:10:24,920 and then we can bail and go to Hayes. 233 00:10:24,917 --> 00:10:26,337 - Okay? Yeah. - [softly] We can't do this. 234 00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:28,665 Oh, but also, he's with Random House too. 235 00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:31,050 So I wanna ask him about an editor. 236 00:10:31,048 --> 00:10:33,428 Ladies, everyone... 237 00:10:33,425 --> 00:10:34,465 Sorry. 238 00:10:34,468 --> 00:10:36,508 WOMAN: Maybe we weren't held... 239 00:10:36,512 --> 00:10:38,222 [softly] We can't just leave after a minute. 240 00:10:38,222 --> 00:10:40,062 We have to stay a little bit longer or it would be rude. 241 00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:44,981 ...maybe you weren't invited to that birthday party because... 242 00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:49,359 everybody knew that you always wore a T-shirt over your bathing suit. 243 00:10:50,442 --> 00:10:52,532 - Fuck it. Let's go now. - No, we can't... 244 00:10:52,528 --> 00:10:55,108 - Let's go. Come on. Let's go. - Stop. You're not gonna leave me... 245 00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:57,573 Come on. I'm not staying. Come on. 246 00:10:57,574 --> 00:10:58,624 Amy! 247 00:11:01,203 --> 00:11:02,373 [door opens] 248 00:11:02,371 --> 00:11:03,711 I'm sorry. 249 00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:04,705 [door closes] 250 00:11:05,541 --> 00:11:08,631 Let's begin by closing our eyes 251 00:11:08,627 --> 00:11:13,837 and remembering a time we emotionally abandoned ourselves. 252 00:11:21,932 --> 00:11:23,432 JESS: [chuckling] I should've known. 253 00:11:25,978 --> 00:11:27,098 [softly] I love this room. 254 00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:29,936 All these... books! 255 00:11:29,940 --> 00:11:31,070 Oh, you should take that one. 256 00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:34,610 Hayes MacKeown. Oh, my mom reads everything he writes. 257 00:11:36,530 --> 00:11:38,990 CLARE: And this ladder. I've only seen them in the movies. 258 00:11:38,991 --> 00:11:42,701 I didn't know normal people had bookcases with ladders! 259 00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:44,123 JESS: You think my parents are normal? 260 00:11:44,121 --> 00:11:45,121 Yes. 261 00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:47,958 They think you're just with some... 262 00:11:49,376 --> 00:11:51,336 - backwoods... - What? 263 00:11:51,336 --> 00:11:53,336 - Why did I wear this dress? - Stop. 264 00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:54,338 You're perfect. 265 00:11:57,134 --> 00:11:58,184 When... 266 00:11:58,594 --> 00:11:59,854 do you think we should tell them? 267 00:12:00,429 --> 00:12:01,429 Tell them what? 268 00:12:01,430 --> 00:12:02,810 JESS: That we're engaged. 269 00:12:05,934 --> 00:12:06,944 What? 270 00:12:09,688 --> 00:12:10,688 We should get married. 271 00:12:11,273 --> 00:12:12,273 No. 272 00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:14,821 Well, we've only been together, like... 273 00:12:15,903 --> 00:12:17,703 We've only been together, like, three months. 274 00:12:17,696 --> 00:12:18,696 JESS: I... I don't care. 275 00:12:21,283 --> 00:12:22,583 I don't. I want us to... 276 00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,251 I want us to spend our lives together. 277 00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:29,575 And then one day, we'll... 278 00:12:31,502 --> 00:12:32,502 We'll have our own house, 279 00:12:32,503 --> 00:12:34,133 and... and it'll be full of... 280 00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:38,379 - art and so many books... - Books. 281 00:12:38,383 --> 00:12:40,433 ...and as many ladders as you want. 282 00:12:44,348 --> 00:12:45,558 Are you being serious? 283 00:12:48,310 --> 00:12:49,730 Uh... 284 00:12:49,728 --> 00:12:50,938 - If you say yes, yeah. - Yeah, right. 285 00:12:54,149 --> 00:12:56,149 [indistinct chatter] 286 00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:01,534 MAN: You kinda... You wanna unlive that. You know what I mean? 287 00:13:02,199 --> 00:13:04,579 However, it does beg the question, 288 00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:07,956 this is... this is probably gonna be a plotline for the next one, 289 00:13:07,955 --> 00:13:10,205 if I ever do a next one 'cause why the fuck would I bother? 290 00:13:10,207 --> 00:13:11,957 But that being said... 291 00:13:12,876 --> 00:13:13,876 Excuse me? 292 00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:19,721 Oh, hi. I'm so sorry, but I'm just gonna sneak in there. 293 00:13:19,716 --> 00:13:21,636 No. You... You can't. It's full. 294 00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:25,604 No one's gonna know if I go in there. 295 00:13:25,597 --> 00:13:28,887 I tried my workshop, but it's just... It's not a great fit for me. 296 00:13:28,892 --> 00:13:31,442 So I'm... I think I could just slip into that. 297 00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,146 I can't let you join that one, 298 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:35,476 but I... I can get you into, uh, 299 00:13:35,482 --> 00:13:38,532 "Kooks, Crazies, and Nut Jobs: Writing About Mental Illness" 300 00:13:38,527 --> 00:13:40,027 with Jan Barnes-Jablonski. 301 00:13:40,028 --> 00:13:42,568 I don't think any of those words are okay to say. 302 00:13:42,573 --> 00:13:44,453 It's literally the name of the workshop. 303 00:13:44,449 --> 00:13:45,329 AMY: Clare. Clare. 304 00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:46,485 CLARE: Oh. 305 00:13:51,248 --> 00:13:53,168 AMY: Uh-huh, okay. Can you hold on one second? 306 00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:54,166 Amy! [scoffs] 307 00:13:54,168 --> 00:13:55,958 Oh, my God, I'm dealing with this book stuff. 308 00:13:55,961 --> 00:13:57,961 My agent wants this book to come out in... 309 00:13:57,963 --> 00:13:59,633 Why did you just leave me? 310 00:14:01,175 --> 00:14:03,045 - Are you being serious right now? - Yeah! 311 00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:06,721 I didn't leave you, Clare. You stayed. 312 00:14:08,015 --> 00:14:09,015 CLARE: Ugh. 313 00:14:10,350 --> 00:14:11,640 Hi. Yeah, I'm here. 314 00:14:13,061 --> 00:14:15,521 I... I don't know, I've never been to London before. 315 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:20,067 Wow. 316 00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:22,653 This... This is incredible. 317 00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:25,494 Yeah, well, don't expect a home library. 318 00:14:26,408 --> 00:14:27,408 Hi! 319 00:14:27,409 --> 00:14:29,039 Hi, Mom. JESS: Hi! 320 00:14:29,036 --> 00:14:30,536 - We meet again! - Whoa! 321 00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:32,997 CLARE: Jess didn't believe me when I said, "Middle of nowhere." 322 00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:34,828 - Hi, honey. - I missed you. 323 00:14:34,833 --> 00:14:36,213 How was the drive? 324 00:14:37,711 --> 00:14:39,211 I hope no one rear-ended you. 325 00:14:39,213 --> 00:14:40,923 [laughing] No. No. 326 00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:41,923 FRANKIE: This time. 327 00:14:46,428 --> 00:14:47,428 Is this... 328 00:14:48,514 --> 00:14:49,894 Is this, um... 329 00:14:49,890 --> 00:14:51,140 Yeah. 330 00:14:51,642 --> 00:14:54,902 Yeah. Yeah, we... we wanted it to be a... a surprise. 331 00:14:54,895 --> 00:14:56,855 It's Jess' grandma's engagement ring. 332 00:14:57,689 --> 00:14:59,149 I am surprised. 333 00:15:01,568 --> 00:15:03,778 DANNY: [on voice mail] Hey, it's Danny. You know what to do. 334 00:15:03,779 --> 00:15:05,409 Hey, it's me. I'm just checking in 335 00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:07,985 because I... I just hate how we left things, and I just... 336 00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:10,325 This place is so awful. 337 00:15:11,370 --> 00:15:14,790 People are so weird, and... and everyone is vegan, 338 00:15:14,790 --> 00:15:16,000 and there's, like, no bar, 339 00:15:15,999 --> 00:15:18,289 and I just... I'm, like... Just wanna... 340 00:15:22,756 --> 00:15:26,006 Uh, anyway, so I'll just see you tomorrow night. 341 00:15:26,009 --> 00:15:28,389 And, um, uh... Okay. All right. Bye. 342 00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:45,778 Ooh, my God! 343 00:15:47,239 --> 00:15:49,369 - You all right? - Yeah, it's hotter than I... 344 00:15:49,366 --> 00:15:50,446 Ooh! 345 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:51,830 - HAYES: You'll get used to it. - Yeah. 346 00:15:56,206 --> 00:15:57,206 I'm Clare. 347 00:15:58,417 --> 00:15:59,957 P... Pierce. 348 00:15:59,960 --> 00:16:00,960 Oh, yeah? 349 00:16:01,712 --> 00:16:03,552 CLARE: You probably don't remember my name. 350 00:16:05,757 --> 00:16:09,847 Oh, look, if I... If I did anything, uh, inappropriate, 351 00:16:09,845 --> 00:16:11,465 it was entirely my fault. 352 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:13,931 I was a whiskey sodden wanker 353 00:16:13,932 --> 00:16:15,352 - with the manners of a fuckin'... - Oh, my God. No! 354 00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:17,230 - No? - Yeah. No. 355 00:16:17,227 --> 00:16:18,767 All right, that's a fucking relief. 356 00:16:18,770 --> 00:16:23,150 Actually, I sent you a letter, uh, once 357 00:16:23,150 --> 00:16:25,650 - with a short story... - Oh, yeah? 358 00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:26,652 ...that I'd written. 359 00:16:26,653 --> 00:16:29,743 It's called "The House with the Blue Canoe." 360 00:16:30,240 --> 00:16:32,200 Right. CLARE: It was a long time ago. 361 00:16:32,201 --> 00:16:34,291 It was, like, 18 years ago that I wrote it. 362 00:16:34,286 --> 00:16:36,036 It was on the back of a menu. 363 00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:38,368 I was a waitress. Had a lot of doodles on it. 364 00:16:38,373 --> 00:16:39,373 Nice. 365 00:16:39,374 --> 00:16:42,344 The menu had a lot of stuff on it, like, "Surf, Surf, and Surf." 366 00:16:42,336 --> 00:16:43,336 HAYES: [chuckling] Okay. 367 00:16:43,337 --> 00:16:45,837 He was a very irreverent chef. HAYES: Right. 368 00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:49,509 Um, anyway, the... the point is, is that I wrote to you about my story 369 00:16:49,510 --> 00:16:50,930 and then you answered me back. 370 00:16:52,429 --> 00:16:53,429 What did I say? 371 00:16:54,014 --> 00:16:58,444 "Dear Clare, thank you so much for sharing your beautiful short story. 372 00:16:58,435 --> 00:17:00,395 "I was deep in the throes of writing, 373 00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:03,765 "but I just had to stop to tell you to keep up the good work and keep going. 374 00:17:03,774 --> 00:17:07,194 There's something special there. Much love, H.M." 375 00:17:07,194 --> 00:17:08,994 [exhales] Or something like that. 376 00:17:08,987 --> 00:17:10,857 Yeah. That's nice. 377 00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:12,698 Anyway... 378 00:17:15,494 --> 00:17:20,504 You told me to... You... told me to keep going. 379 00:17:20,499 --> 00:17:22,379 - HAYES: Good. - So I did. 380 00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:23,836 - Okay, good! - Yeah. 381 00:17:23,836 --> 00:17:25,956 Then... I didn't. 382 00:17:27,130 --> 00:17:28,170 I didn't. I... 383 00:17:29,842 --> 00:17:31,642 Oh, I thought that if I just, like, saw you, 384 00:17:31,635 --> 00:17:34,135 like... saw you, saw you... 385 00:17:34,137 --> 00:17:37,767 Like, it... it would just jar something loose in me 386 00:17:37,766 --> 00:17:41,976 or just, like, dislodge something that's, like, kept me from... 387 00:17:43,647 --> 00:17:46,317 [sighs] Do you remember what you saw in me? 388 00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,279 I didn't read your story. 389 00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:54,700 And I... I didn't write to you, for that matter. 390 00:17:54,700 --> 00:17:55,700 You did. 391 00:17:55,701 --> 00:17:57,661 I have, like... I have it right up there. You definitely did. 392 00:17:57,661 --> 00:18:00,411 No, no, no, no, no. That wasn't me. That would've been Morag. 393 00:18:00,414 --> 00:18:02,584 Is... Morag is a person? 394 00:18:02,583 --> 00:18:04,633 Morag. Yes. That was my first wife. 395 00:18:04,626 --> 00:18:07,666 She used to answer all my fan mail, you know? 396 00:18:07,671 --> 00:18:09,551 And, um, she was a poet. 397 00:18:09,548 --> 00:18:13,638 She definitely... She would've used the word "throes." 398 00:18:13,635 --> 00:18:15,845 I mean, she had a tendency towards the dramatic, 399 00:18:15,846 --> 00:18:17,426 which was unfortunate. 400 00:18:17,431 --> 00:18:20,431 But she had really good taste in other people's work. 401 00:18:21,101 --> 00:18:24,231 And she loved fish. Shellfish. 402 00:18:25,439 --> 00:18:29,399 So "Surf, Surf, and Surf" would've been right up her alley. 403 00:18:29,985 --> 00:18:32,395 [inhales] Well, okay. 404 00:18:34,698 --> 00:18:36,368 Jess, please sit. 405 00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:37,946 Oh, no, it's okay. 406 00:18:37,951 --> 00:18:39,581 I actually... 407 00:18:40,954 --> 00:18:43,584 I need to use the, uh, outhouse. 408 00:18:43,582 --> 00:18:46,462 Then I will tackle the dishes. You stay right there. 409 00:18:47,711 --> 00:18:48,551 [door closes] 410 00:18:48,545 --> 00:18:51,045 He's a really good guy, Mom. 411 00:18:51,048 --> 00:18:52,548 FRANKIE: He seems wonderful. 412 00:18:53,467 --> 00:18:55,547 And he obviously adores you. 413 00:18:55,552 --> 00:18:58,352 But you are both just so young. 414 00:18:58,347 --> 00:19:00,967 I just don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. 415 00:19:01,475 --> 00:19:02,475 CLARE: Okay, well... 416 00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:07,150 Jess isn't Dad, and I'm not you. 417 00:19:10,108 --> 00:19:13,818 I don't wanna live like this forever. 418 00:19:14,571 --> 00:19:19,991 There's a whole world out there of art and... culture 419 00:19:19,993 --> 00:19:22,413 and... and rooms full of books. 420 00:19:22,412 --> 00:19:23,542 And I want that. 421 00:19:24,039 --> 00:19:26,749 You should have whatever you want. 422 00:19:28,335 --> 00:19:29,745 Okay. Well, I want more than this. 423 00:19:35,968 --> 00:19:36,968 [door opens] 424 00:19:36,969 --> 00:19:39,389 Whoo! Hello! 425 00:19:40,264 --> 00:19:45,064 So, there's, like, a fire-pit jamboree or something tonight, if you wanna... 426 00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,560 What are you doing? 427 00:19:46,562 --> 00:19:47,942 I... I think I'm gonna head out. 428 00:19:48,897 --> 00:19:49,897 [Amy sighs] 429 00:19:52,526 --> 00:19:54,026 I'm sorry if this... 430 00:19:55,612 --> 00:19:57,412 feels hard for you. 431 00:19:57,406 --> 00:20:00,076 Who said anything about anything being hard? 432 00:20:00,075 --> 00:20:02,325 Why can't you even pretend to be happy for me? 433 00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:05,661 What? Amy, I am so happy for you. 434 00:20:05,664 --> 00:20:08,834 Okay. You're happy for me? CLARE: I am. 435 00:20:08,834 --> 00:20:10,674 I mean, you got a book deal 20 years ago, 436 00:20:10,669 --> 00:20:13,509 and I've been busting my ass trying to catch up ever since. 437 00:20:13,505 --> 00:20:14,505 16 years ago. 438 00:20:15,591 --> 00:20:16,801 And then I had Rae. 439 00:20:17,301 --> 00:20:18,301 Okay, so... 440 00:20:19,428 --> 00:20:21,758 you... you got the thing that you chose to do, 441 00:20:21,763 --> 00:20:23,723 but yet, you're not really that happy for me 442 00:20:23,724 --> 00:20:26,274 when I get the thing that I chose to do. 443 00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:27,978 That's not fair. AMY: It's not? 444 00:20:27,978 --> 00:20:31,228 I've been with you, side by side, neck and neck, 445 00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:35,321 for every single little and big event in your entire life. 446 00:20:35,319 --> 00:20:37,819 I've been there for your wedding to Danny, 447 00:20:37,821 --> 00:20:39,661 all the kid's birthday parties, 448 00:20:39,656 --> 00:20:42,276 the snot noses, the discolored shits. 449 00:20:42,284 --> 00:20:45,874 Your joys were my joys. Your bummers were my bummers. 450 00:20:45,871 --> 00:20:49,711 And you can't even, I don't know, be happy for me! 451 00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:51,588 Because I was happy for you 452 00:20:51,585 --> 00:20:55,335 when you got all the things that you wanted that I didn't get. 453 00:20:55,339 --> 00:20:57,879 That's different. That's, like... You didn't want those things! 454 00:20:57,883 --> 00:20:59,933 AMY: How do you know what I want? 455 00:20:59,927 --> 00:21:01,087 It's, like, you just... 456 00:21:02,930 --> 00:21:04,390 I'm sorry, but you just act like 457 00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:06,519 you're the only fucking person in the entire world 458 00:21:06,517 --> 00:21:08,387 that didn't get your heart's desire. 459 00:21:08,769 --> 00:21:09,769 You didn't write a book. 460 00:21:10,729 --> 00:21:12,939 You didn't... write... the book. 461 00:21:13,482 --> 00:21:14,942 You didn't become the writer 462 00:21:14,942 --> 00:21:17,532 that you imagined that you were going to become. 463 00:21:17,528 --> 00:21:19,818 And it's not my fault! 464 00:21:19,821 --> 00:21:21,451 And it's not Danny's fault. 465 00:21:21,448 --> 00:21:23,908 And it's definitely not Rae's fault. 466 00:21:29,706 --> 00:21:31,876 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That was... 467 00:21:33,836 --> 00:21:34,836 Clare. 468 00:21:36,255 --> 00:21:37,255 [door slams shut] 469 00:21:41,969 --> 00:21:44,299 ♪ somber music playing ♪ 470 00:22:09,162 --> 00:22:11,962 FRANKIE: I can take this up for you after the wedding. 471 00:22:11,957 --> 00:22:14,127 It'll make a lovely summer dress. 472 00:22:16,753 --> 00:22:17,753 Thanks, Mom. 473 00:22:20,174 --> 00:22:21,804 What is it, sweet pea? 474 00:22:22,217 --> 00:22:23,217 Too tight? 475 00:22:27,973 --> 00:22:29,563 Do you think I'm making a mistake? 476 00:22:32,603 --> 00:22:34,483 This is not a runaway train. 477 00:22:35,189 --> 00:22:36,979 And if you don't want to do this, 478 00:22:38,108 --> 00:22:39,988 you can step off at any time. 479 00:22:42,821 --> 00:22:44,411 No. I love him. 480 00:22:44,406 --> 00:22:45,406 And everyone's here. 481 00:22:47,743 --> 00:22:49,703 That is not why you get married. 482 00:22:53,707 --> 00:22:55,997 I'm sorry I acted like this wasn't good enough. 483 00:22:59,463 --> 00:23:00,463 That's okay. 484 00:23:07,846 --> 00:23:08,966 CLARE: Hey. AMY: Mm. 485 00:23:13,018 --> 00:23:14,978 I didn't know you wanted to have kids. 486 00:23:15,979 --> 00:23:16,979 I said... 487 00:23:18,815 --> 00:23:20,645 that I wasn't having kids. 488 00:23:23,529 --> 00:23:24,529 Amy... 489 00:23:26,323 --> 00:23:27,953 I'm just... [exhales] 490 00:23:27,950 --> 00:23:30,790 I'm just really tired of people looking at me 491 00:23:30,786 --> 00:23:33,406 like I'm some un... unrealized woman 492 00:23:33,413 --> 00:23:36,713 because I'm... I'm not a mother. 493 00:23:38,001 --> 00:23:39,381 And then sometimes... 494 00:23:40,462 --> 00:23:42,342 [exhales] ...I think that they're right. 495 00:23:44,883 --> 00:23:45,883 Amy. 496 00:23:48,262 --> 00:23:50,222 You are an amazing woman. 497 00:23:50,222 --> 00:23:51,892 You're fearless. 498 00:23:51,890 --> 00:23:52,930 You're gorgeous. 499 00:23:52,933 --> 00:23:55,023 You're funny as shit. 500 00:23:55,018 --> 00:23:58,558 You once worked a double with a plum up your vagina. 501 00:23:59,398 --> 00:24:00,768 Who else can say that? 502 00:24:00,774 --> 00:24:03,744 Oh, my God. I hope nobody. [Clare chuckles] 503 00:24:06,613 --> 00:24:10,033 You are the best friend that anyone could ever have. 504 00:24:11,034 --> 00:24:13,414 And you are a soon-to-be... 505 00:24:14,371 --> 00:24:16,581 bestselling novelist. 506 00:24:17,791 --> 00:24:18,791 I know that. 507 00:24:21,044 --> 00:24:22,054 Thank you. 508 00:24:27,134 --> 00:24:28,594 Can I come here, please? AMY: Yes. 509 00:24:36,518 --> 00:24:37,518 Mm. 510 00:24:37,936 --> 00:24:39,806 Hayes didn't even write me that letter. 511 00:24:39,813 --> 00:24:41,573 What? What're you talking about? 512 00:24:41,565 --> 00:24:43,395 It turns out it was his wife. 513 00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:45,440 - One of his wives. - Oh, my God. 514 00:24:45,444 --> 00:24:47,324 - Named Morag. - Morag? 515 00:24:47,321 --> 00:24:48,531 Morag. 516 00:24:49,239 --> 00:24:53,289 And she was the one who answered all of his fan mail. 517 00:24:53,285 --> 00:24:54,285 Barf. 518 00:24:55,829 --> 00:24:57,039 Let me tell you something. 519 00:24:58,290 --> 00:24:59,880 I bet you 520 00:24:59,875 --> 00:25:03,455 that Hayes MacKeown would... 521 00:25:04,463 --> 00:25:07,883 kill to be turning 50 right now, 522 00:25:07,883 --> 00:25:09,643 his whole life ahead of him. 523 00:25:16,767 --> 00:25:17,767 There you go. 524 00:25:20,812 --> 00:25:23,442 CLARE: Hi. It's me again. 525 00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:25,070 Blue Canoe, right? 526 00:25:25,067 --> 00:25:26,937 I'm gonna make you actually sign my letter. 527 00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:31,621 Is this my Morag penitence? 528 00:25:31,615 --> 00:25:33,325 Maybe. HAYES: Okay. 529 00:25:33,825 --> 00:25:36,865 See the handwriting runs right off the fucking page. Look at that. 530 00:25:36,870 --> 00:25:37,870 CLARE: I know. 531 00:25:40,207 --> 00:25:41,327 Whatever happened to her? 532 00:25:41,750 --> 00:25:43,790 - Oh, she left. - Ah, right. 533 00:25:43,794 --> 00:25:45,424 - HAYES: I mean, they all fucking left. - Mm. 534 00:25:47,172 --> 00:25:50,802 MAN: Dear Sugar. It's... It's like this online advice column. 535 00:25:50,801 --> 00:25:54,891 But she writes these raw, gorgeous essays that just gut you. 536 00:25:54,888 --> 00:25:56,808 WOMAN: Oh, I don't do self-help. 537 00:25:56,807 --> 00:26:00,887 It's not even like that, okay? It's... It's... She's been through it. 538 00:26:00,894 --> 00:26:03,484 She's been through it, and she's real about it and you can tell. 539 00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:05,270 MAN: She would... She would... HAYES: Oi! 540 00:26:05,274 --> 00:26:08,404 WOMAN: Okay, you've convinced me... 541 00:26:08,402 --> 00:26:09,992 You know what? HAYES: Hmm? 542 00:26:10,904 --> 00:26:12,204 Why don't you keep it? 543 00:26:12,197 --> 00:26:13,197 - HAYES: Really? - Yeah. 544 00:26:13,198 --> 00:26:14,488 - HAYES: You sure about that? - I'm good. 545 00:26:15,742 --> 00:26:16,992 That's nice of you. 546 00:26:18,787 --> 00:26:20,287 I would like this though. 547 00:26:20,289 --> 00:26:21,919 Please. Sign. 548 00:26:21,915 --> 00:26:22,915 All right. 549 00:26:23,667 --> 00:26:25,287 Should I personalize it? 550 00:26:25,294 --> 00:26:27,174 Should I use the word "throes"? 551 00:26:28,672 --> 00:26:29,922 Uh, "Sugar." 552 00:26:29,923 --> 00:26:31,683 You can make it out to... 553 00:26:34,052 --> 00:26:35,052 "Sugar." 554 00:26:37,181 --> 00:26:38,351 All right. 555 00:26:42,394 --> 00:26:43,404 CLARE: Dear women, 556 00:26:45,355 --> 00:26:47,185 I'm writing to all of you out there 557 00:26:47,191 --> 00:26:52,031 who are in the throes of trying to answer these impossible questions. 558 00:26:52,779 --> 00:26:53,779 When should I go? 559 00:26:55,199 --> 00:26:56,659 When do I leave? 560 00:26:57,868 --> 00:26:59,118 And how do I stay? 561 00:27:01,371 --> 00:27:04,961 Right before my junior year of college, I married a good man 562 00:27:04,958 --> 00:27:09,378 whom I both loved and should not have married. 563 00:27:10,964 --> 00:27:13,014 Because the day I married him, 564 00:27:13,675 --> 00:27:18,595 there was a small, clear voice inside me that said, "Go." 565 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:20,640 That said... 566 00:27:21,642 --> 00:27:22,642 "Go... 567 00:27:23,602 --> 00:27:24,812 "even though you love him. 568 00:27:25,729 --> 00:27:26,899 "Go... 569 00:27:27,731 --> 00:27:30,781 "even though he is kind and faithful and good to you. 570 00:27:31,652 --> 00:27:32,862 "Go... 571 00:27:32,861 --> 00:27:35,071 "even though there is nowhere to go. 572 00:27:35,989 --> 00:27:36,989 "Go... 573 00:27:38,033 --> 00:27:41,373 even though you don't know exactly why you can't stay." 574 00:27:42,579 --> 00:27:44,289 And once I heard that voice, 575 00:27:44,289 --> 00:27:46,079 I couldn't unhear it. 576 00:27:47,125 --> 00:27:49,995 So instead, I tried not to listen. 577 00:27:50,838 --> 00:27:54,548 Oh, but, women, you have to listen. 578 00:27:55,884 --> 00:27:58,224 There are so many reasons we should stay. 579 00:28:00,514 --> 00:28:04,064 But there is really only one reason to go. 580 00:28:04,059 --> 00:28:05,599 AMY: Should we hit the outlets on the way home? 581 00:28:06,061 --> 00:28:07,101 CLARE: Ooh. Yeah. 582 00:28:09,439 --> 00:28:10,439 Go... 583 00:28:11,233 --> 00:28:12,533 because you want to. 584 00:28:14,403 --> 00:28:15,403 Go... 585 00:28:15,404 --> 00:28:18,534 because wanting to leave is enough. 586 00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,790 Yours, Sugar. 587 00:28:30,460 --> 00:28:31,550 Hey. 588 00:28:32,129 --> 00:28:33,509 Hi. I'm so glad you're up. 589 00:28:34,006 --> 00:28:35,216 DANNY: Yeah. 590 00:28:35,215 --> 00:28:36,715 How... How was it? 591 00:28:36,717 --> 00:28:39,087 Oh, uh, it was, like, awful. 592 00:28:39,094 --> 00:28:41,934 And then, it was... actually good. 593 00:28:45,934 --> 00:28:47,354 I, uh, I... 594 00:28:48,770 --> 00:28:49,770 I'm sorry. 595 00:28:52,149 --> 00:28:53,149 For what? 596 00:28:55,652 --> 00:28:56,652 I've, um... 597 00:28:58,947 --> 00:29:00,117 I have been trying to... 598 00:29:01,491 --> 00:29:02,871 get out of this hole. 599 00:29:03,827 --> 00:29:04,827 Um... 600 00:29:07,956 --> 00:29:13,746 And I've been blaming you and... Rae too, honestly. 601 00:29:14,755 --> 00:29:17,375 Neither of you have kept me down in it. 602 00:29:17,382 --> 00:29:19,762 Clare, I... CLARE: No, no, um... 603 00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:22,220 You were right. I did betray your trust. 604 00:29:22,221 --> 00:29:25,351 It has nothing to do with Lucas or the money. 605 00:29:26,975 --> 00:29:28,685 It's about our life together. 606 00:29:30,270 --> 00:29:31,270 I, uh... 607 00:29:32,648 --> 00:29:33,648 I disappeared. 608 00:29:35,692 --> 00:29:37,492 I emotionally bailed 609 00:29:38,362 --> 00:29:39,742 on so many levels 610 00:29:40,447 --> 00:29:42,617 and I just, like, haven't felt alive. 611 00:29:44,826 --> 00:29:46,536 - You know? - Yeah. Yeah. 612 00:29:47,788 --> 00:29:50,368 And so I have been working on something. 613 00:29:50,374 --> 00:29:52,884 Something I haven't told you about. 614 00:29:52,876 --> 00:29:54,086 And I think it's really good. 615 00:29:54,086 --> 00:29:56,296 And I... I think people think it's really good. 616 00:29:56,296 --> 00:29:58,006 And I'm gonna do it. 617 00:29:58,006 --> 00:30:00,426 I'm gonna work on it. Full time. 618 00:30:00,425 --> 00:30:04,095 So don't be mad, but I... I wanna quit my job, okay? 619 00:30:04,096 --> 00:30:06,096 And I... I... I know I just took it on, 620 00:30:06,098 --> 00:30:07,678 but I think that that's what has to happen. 621 00:30:07,683 --> 00:30:08,563 Yeah. 622 00:30:09,142 --> 00:30:12,272 And I also spent 200 bucks at the outlets, and that's it. 623 00:30:14,982 --> 00:30:16,612 Okay. CLARE: Okay? 624 00:30:17,526 --> 00:30:19,646 Oh, thank you. Thank you, Danny. 625 00:30:21,822 --> 00:30:24,242 What? We're gonna figure this out. 626 00:30:24,241 --> 00:30:26,371 - I... I'm, uh... - Just you, me, and Rae. 627 00:30:26,368 --> 00:30:28,578 - Gimme a se... Let me talk. - Okay. No. Okay. 628 00:30:29,079 --> 00:30:30,079 I am... 629 00:30:31,081 --> 00:30:32,921 so happy for you. I really am. 630 00:30:32,916 --> 00:30:35,336 But, um, I don't wanna do this anymore. 631 00:30:36,962 --> 00:30:37,962 Do what? 632 00:30:38,547 --> 00:30:40,127 This. Us. 633 00:30:40,132 --> 00:30:41,882 - CLARE: You don't wanna do us? - I wanna go. 634 00:30:42,968 --> 00:30:44,218 What are you talking about? 635 00:30:44,970 --> 00:30:46,760 I wanna go because I want to. 636 00:30:47,848 --> 00:30:48,848 And... 637 00:30:50,642 --> 00:30:52,982 And wanting to leave, it's... it's enough. 638 00:30:53,770 --> 00:30:56,770 ♪ 639 00:31:00,068 --> 00:31:02,488 ♪ I fell in love with you ♪ 640 00:31:02,487 --> 00:31:05,067 ♪ Long before I knew ♪ 641 00:31:05,073 --> 00:31:10,123 ♪ What it meant to give everything up ♪ 642 00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:12,540 ♪ I was a rolling stone ♪ 643 00:31:12,539 --> 00:31:14,999 ♪ Rolling my way alone ♪ 644 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:19,840 ♪ Till you came and made sense out of everything ♪ 645 00:31:20,422 --> 00:31:23,342 ♪ If it was all a mistake ♪ 646 00:31:25,677 --> 00:31:28,637 ♪ Then I guess we're both to blame ♪ 647 00:31:30,182 --> 00:31:31,892 ♪ I could've been ♪ 648 00:31:32,476 --> 00:31:34,596 ♪ So many things ♪ 649 00:31:34,603 --> 00:31:38,823 ♪ But it would never be enough for you ♪ 650 00:31:39,650 --> 00:31:41,190 ♪ I was the one ♪ 651 00:31:41,902 --> 00:31:43,952 ♪ You counted on ♪ 652 00:31:43,946 --> 00:31:48,526 ♪ But I was never the one for you ♪ 653 00:31:49,660 --> 00:31:51,120 ♪ Now I know ♪ 654 00:31:52,412 --> 00:31:56,462 ♪ I lost you a long time ago ♪