1 00:00:01,043 --> 00:00:02,837 THERAPIST: How are you both? 2 00:00:02,837 --> 00:00:04,506 DANNY: Great. CLARE: Fine. 3 00:00:04,506 --> 00:00:05,465 Good. 4 00:00:05,882 --> 00:00:07,842 Danny blasted porn on the Bluetooth speaker-- 5 00:00:07,842 --> 00:00:10,554 Clare's vibrator literally melted from overuse. 6 00:00:10,554 --> 00:00:11,930 ♪ 7 00:00:11,930 --> 00:00:13,390 CLARE: My life is a mess. 8 00:00:13,390 --> 00:00:15,809 My husband kicked me out a few days ago. 9 00:00:16,851 --> 00:00:18,770 My daughter hates me. [gasps] 10 00:00:18,770 --> 00:00:20,355 - Oh, my God. - Mom! 11 00:00:20,355 --> 00:00:21,815 A threesome is a big leap. 12 00:00:21,815 --> 00:00:25,235 Maybe you were subconsciously worried about our little threesome? 13 00:00:25,235 --> 00:00:27,320 - What? - Me and you and Dad. 14 00:00:27,320 --> 00:00:28,196 Ew! 15 00:00:28,196 --> 00:00:30,949 ♪ 16 00:00:30,949 --> 00:00:32,909 CLARE: What would I tell 17 00:00:32,909 --> 00:00:35,787 my 22-year-old self? 18 00:00:35,787 --> 00:00:37,539 Don't take your mom for granted. 19 00:00:37,539 --> 00:00:39,583 She won't be here forever. 20 00:00:39,583 --> 00:00:41,543 ♪ 21 00:00:41,543 --> 00:00:43,920 What does it mean to heal? To move on? 22 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:46,131 To let go? 23 00:00:46,131 --> 00:00:48,675 ♪ 24 00:00:49,426 --> 00:00:51,761 Why can't you make new friends? Like what happened to Bethany? 25 00:00:51,761 --> 00:00:54,139 Bethany had anal sex on a Greyhound going to Reno. 26 00:00:54,139 --> 00:00:55,473 - What? - Yeah. 27 00:00:55,473 --> 00:00:57,934 Why would she want to take a bus to Reno? 28 00:01:01,187 --> 00:01:02,188 [keyboard clicking] 29 00:01:02,188 --> 00:01:03,481 WOMAN: Dear Sugar, 30 00:01:04,274 --> 00:01:06,151 I've never written a fan letter before, 31 00:01:07,068 --> 00:01:09,905 but I read your advice column religiously. 32 00:01:11,281 --> 00:01:14,284 Probably because given the state of my life, 33 00:01:14,284 --> 00:01:16,286 I could use some advice. 34 00:01:16,870 --> 00:01:19,289 ♪ Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? ♪ 35 00:01:19,289 --> 00:01:21,791 ♪ Where they at? Where they at? Where they at? Come on now ♪ 36 00:01:21,791 --> 00:01:23,710 ♪ If you wanna go and take a ride with me ♪ 37 00:01:23,710 --> 00:01:26,421 [woman singing along] ♪ We three-wheeling in the fo' with the gold D's ♪ 38 00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:29,174 ♪ Oh, why do I live this way? ♪ 39 00:01:29,174 --> 00:01:31,218 ♪ Hey, must be the money ♪ 40 00:01:31,218 --> 00:01:33,345 ♪ If you wanna go and get high with me ♪ 41 00:01:33,345 --> 00:01:35,180 ♪ Smoke an L in the back of the Benz-E... ♪ 42 00:01:35,180 --> 00:01:38,600 [woman humming] 43 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:40,518 ♪ Oh, must be the money ♪ 44 00:01:41,728 --> 00:01:43,688 WOMAN: Which house is it again, dear? 45 00:01:47,442 --> 00:01:49,569 - Uh. - Who can't find their way home? 46 00:01:49,569 --> 00:01:52,155 Oh, that's it. That's the one, that's right there. 47 00:01:52,989 --> 00:01:55,951 Great job. [continues singing] 48 00:01:55,951 --> 00:01:59,412 You know, thank you so much, and happy retirement. 49 00:02:00,705 --> 00:02:01,790 Oh, it's locked. 50 00:02:02,415 --> 00:02:04,167 Sorry. [locks click open] 51 00:02:04,709 --> 00:02:05,502 Thank you. 52 00:02:06,586 --> 00:02:07,837 Congratulations. 53 00:02:11,258 --> 00:02:13,426 Ooh, must be the money! 54 00:02:13,426 --> 00:02:14,302 Shhh. 55 00:02:15,845 --> 00:02:18,390 [car driving away] 56 00:02:22,561 --> 00:02:23,603 Noo. 57 00:02:34,030 --> 00:02:35,824 [knocks softly] 58 00:02:41,955 --> 00:02:42,956 Yes! 59 00:02:45,458 --> 00:02:46,459 [grunting] 60 00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:49,921 [bag thudding] 61 00:02:54,759 --> 00:02:58,722 [sing-song] Must be the money! It's gotta be the money. 62 00:03:01,391 --> 00:03:03,602 [thuds] [groans] Fuck! 63 00:03:06,646 --> 00:03:08,440 - [groaning] - Don't you fucking move! 64 00:03:08,982 --> 00:03:11,401 Wha-- Oh, my God. Danny, it's just me. 65 00:03:11,401 --> 00:03:12,903 [footsteps thudding upstairs] Shhh. 66 00:03:12,903 --> 00:03:16,031 Jesus, Clare! Shit, you had me-- I was about to call the cops! 67 00:03:16,031 --> 00:03:17,157 Why? 68 00:03:17,157 --> 00:03:19,367 What are you doing? What are you wearing? 69 00:03:19,367 --> 00:03:23,663 Oh, I borrowed it. It was, um... It's Hawaiian-themed. 70 00:03:23,663 --> 00:03:27,042 I didn't have my keys, and then I-- 71 00:03:27,042 --> 00:03:30,503 The window was-- And it went so... late. 72 00:03:30,503 --> 00:03:31,546 You're drunk. 73 00:03:31,546 --> 00:03:34,216 Is there chicken? 'Cause it smells chickeney in here. 74 00:03:34,216 --> 00:03:36,301 Yeah, we had chicken. Six hours ago. 75 00:03:37,844 --> 00:03:38,845 Ugh. 76 00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:43,475 Mmm. Mm. 77 00:03:45,393 --> 00:03:46,603 Aah. 78 00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:48,355 Ah. 79 00:03:48,355 --> 00:03:50,106 There were toasts and speeches 80 00:03:50,106 --> 00:03:52,734 and, ugh, it's all so tragic, you know? 81 00:03:52,734 --> 00:03:57,030 It's like 43 years of work just whittled down 82 00:03:57,030 --> 00:04:00,242 to a tray of bacon-wrapped pineapple skewers 83 00:04:00,242 --> 00:04:03,453 and Retire-Mints. Get it? 84 00:04:03,453 --> 00:04:04,663 FRANKIE: Mom? 85 00:04:04,663 --> 00:04:09,459 Oh, hey! Frankie, sweetie. 86 00:04:09,459 --> 00:04:13,672 - Rae. - Hey, hon. You wan-- You want some mints? 87 00:04:13,672 --> 00:04:15,590 No. No one wants mints. Ever. 88 00:04:15,590 --> 00:04:16,758 [scoffs] 89 00:04:16,758 --> 00:04:18,385 So there's no chicken? 90 00:04:18,385 --> 00:04:19,844 We ate all the fucking chicken, Clare. 91 00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:20,804 Why are you here? 92 00:04:20,804 --> 00:04:22,722 Whoa! Okay. 93 00:04:23,306 --> 00:04:26,184 Why is everyone being such assholes? 94 00:04:26,184 --> 00:04:27,185 What's going on? 95 00:04:31,314 --> 00:04:32,691 Are you... back? 96 00:04:34,150 --> 00:04:36,069 Wha-- Huh? 97 00:04:37,904 --> 00:04:41,366 Well, I thought that you weren't supposed to be here... or something. 98 00:04:46,705 --> 00:04:47,706 Oh. 99 00:04:50,667 --> 00:04:51,668 [moaning] 100 00:04:53,712 --> 00:04:55,046 Why am I eating this? 101 00:04:55,672 --> 00:04:57,591 Because you literally took the wheel when we drove past-- 102 00:04:57,591 --> 00:04:58,758 Well, you shouldn't have let me. 103 00:04:59,801 --> 00:05:00,886 Shouldn't have let me. 104 00:05:00,886 --> 00:05:02,470 You cannot tell Frankie. 105 00:05:02,470 --> 00:05:03,471 It's Rae. 106 00:05:03,972 --> 00:05:05,098 I hate calling her that. 107 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:09,978 But she's right, though, because they are horrible to gay people. 108 00:05:11,146 --> 00:05:12,355 Queer people. Sorry. 109 00:05:12,939 --> 00:05:14,733 But it isn't just their homophobia. 110 00:05:14,733 --> 00:05:18,278 It's-- it's-- Really, it's, like, look here, it's all this crap 111 00:05:18,278 --> 00:05:21,156 that's just gonna be floating on the planet forever. 112 00:05:21,156 --> 00:05:25,201 You know, wedged into the nostril of some innocent turtle. 113 00:05:25,785 --> 00:05:28,038 But... [moans] 114 00:05:28,038 --> 00:05:29,956 ...the butter and the pickles, it's just-- 115 00:05:30,999 --> 00:05:31,958 Fucckk! 116 00:05:33,543 --> 00:05:35,921 - And those damn waffle fries. - Ooh. 117 00:05:36,755 --> 00:05:37,839 So good. 118 00:05:37,839 --> 00:05:41,259 Well, it's what makes it all so hard. 119 00:05:43,428 --> 00:05:45,639 Everything good turns out to be bad. 120 00:05:46,389 --> 00:05:47,390 [chuckles] 121 00:06:01,238 --> 00:06:02,239 You're welcome. 122 00:06:05,450 --> 00:06:07,869 You kicked me out. You want a "thank you"? 123 00:06:07,869 --> 00:06:09,704 You do realize you're not the victim? 124 00:06:09,704 --> 00:06:11,998 Well, neither are you, Danny. 125 00:06:11,998 --> 00:06:13,708 That's great. CLARE: Neither are you! 126 00:06:13,708 --> 00:06:16,253 - All right. Absolutely great. - Yeah, great, great. Thank you! 127 00:06:16,253 --> 00:06:17,420 [drink splashes] 128 00:06:26,555 --> 00:06:28,390 My life is a mess, Sugar. 129 00:06:29,182 --> 00:06:30,725 My daughter hates me. 130 00:06:30,725 --> 00:06:32,686 My husband kicked me out a few nights ago, 131 00:06:33,186 --> 00:06:36,231 and he thinks I'm crashing on my best friend's couch, 132 00:06:36,231 --> 00:06:37,983 but I'm not. 133 00:06:37,983 --> 00:06:42,487 I'm sitting on her stoop waiting for an Uber... Pool. 134 00:06:43,071 --> 00:06:46,074 ♪ 135 00:06:50,829 --> 00:06:54,082 Wondering how the hell my life ended up here, 136 00:06:54,082 --> 00:06:57,878 looking for comfort from a woman I don't even know. 137 00:06:57,878 --> 00:06:59,379 And also wondering, 138 00:06:59,379 --> 00:07:02,299 has anyone ever written in to offer comfort to you? [phone chimes] 139 00:07:05,468 --> 00:07:10,056 Then I told my mom, "Bitch, college is for pussies. 140 00:07:10,056 --> 00:07:12,058 All that money to graduate for what?" 141 00:07:12,058 --> 00:07:14,519 [boy continues talking] CLARE: I read your response in this week's column, 142 00:07:14,519 --> 00:07:17,981 and one sentence buried deep within your advice 143 00:07:17,981 --> 00:07:19,983 compelled me to write. 144 00:07:19,983 --> 00:07:23,320 It was a sentence about your sister and her cancer. 145 00:07:26,781 --> 00:07:29,034 I'm sorry that she died too young and too soon. 146 00:07:30,535 --> 00:07:31,995 Oh, wait. This is good. 147 00:07:31,995 --> 00:07:33,288 Wait. Stop, stop, stop. 148 00:07:36,708 --> 00:07:37,626 PASSENGER: Cool pad. 149 00:07:39,377 --> 00:07:40,337 [device beeps] 150 00:07:40,337 --> 00:07:42,214 CLARE: But that's the thing about grief, 151 00:07:43,048 --> 00:07:45,967 you can't cry it away or eat it away 152 00:07:45,967 --> 00:07:47,427 or punch it away. 153 00:07:48,678 --> 00:07:50,597 It's just... there, 154 00:07:51,514 --> 00:07:53,308 and you have to survive it. 155 00:07:53,308 --> 00:07:55,227 You have to endure it. 156 00:07:55,227 --> 00:07:56,686 You have to live with it, 157 00:07:58,188 --> 00:07:59,940 which is the hardest thing in the world. 158 00:08:04,778 --> 00:08:06,821 I was 22 when my mother was diagnosed. 159 00:08:09,366 --> 00:08:10,742 WOMAN: Everyone, ready? 160 00:08:10,742 --> 00:08:12,202 Yes. BOY: Yes. 161 00:08:12,827 --> 00:08:16,289 Clare Marie Pierce is an award-winning essay writer 162 00:08:16,289 --> 00:08:19,167 and soon-to-be college graduate with a 4.0, 163 00:08:19,167 --> 00:08:22,879 who is committed to summiting Machu Picchu over spring break! - Mexico! 164 00:08:22,879 --> 00:08:24,548 Come on out, Clare! 165 00:08:24,548 --> 00:08:27,551 [both cheering] 166 00:08:29,052 --> 00:08:31,513 And now, a high school senior 167 00:08:31,513 --> 00:08:33,557 who cannot get a tattoo until he graduates, 168 00:08:33,557 --> 00:08:35,225 no matter how compelling his argument, 169 00:08:35,225 --> 00:08:38,061 - and who's-- - Is still a virgin! 170 00:08:38,061 --> 00:08:39,062 BOY: Stop saying that. 171 00:08:39,062 --> 00:08:40,647 Worn the same T-shirt for four days running 172 00:08:40,647 --> 00:08:44,025 and appears to have no intention of taking it off! 173 00:08:44,568 --> 00:08:48,446 - Get out here, Lucas! - Lucas! 174 00:08:48,446 --> 00:08:51,700 [both cheering] 175 00:08:51,700 --> 00:08:52,909 Yeah. 176 00:08:52,909 --> 00:08:54,452 Are we ever gonna be too old for this? 177 00:08:54,452 --> 00:08:55,787 We'll be doing this when I'm 80. 178 00:08:57,330 --> 00:08:58,456 Merry Christmas. 179 00:08:59,124 --> 00:09:01,710 CLARE: And lately, I keep playing our last Christmas together 180 00:09:01,710 --> 00:09:04,129 over and over in my mind. 181 00:09:05,881 --> 00:09:07,340 WOMAN: Me first. 182 00:09:07,340 --> 00:09:09,134 Me first. 183 00:09:09,968 --> 00:09:11,386 I get to go first. 184 00:09:15,056 --> 00:09:16,057 Ooh. 185 00:09:17,017 --> 00:09:20,478 LUCAS: Oh, no way! Is it vintage or something? 186 00:09:20,478 --> 00:09:22,063 I knew you wanted one. 187 00:09:22,856 --> 00:09:24,107 It was your father's. 188 00:09:26,484 --> 00:09:27,485 He sent it? 189 00:09:29,195 --> 00:09:30,572 I refurbished it. 190 00:09:32,365 --> 00:09:34,451 - [tool clatters] - Lucas, don't be a little shit. 191 00:09:34,451 --> 00:09:35,911 Somebody gives you something, you take it. 192 00:09:35,911 --> 00:09:36,912 You take it. 193 00:09:36,912 --> 00:09:38,705 I'm not the one who's ever wanted anything from him. 194 00:09:38,705 --> 00:09:40,707 It's okay. He doesn't have to. 195 00:09:44,169 --> 00:09:46,046 All right, you go ahead, honey. 196 00:09:48,256 --> 00:09:49,841 Jess said that you needed one. 197 00:09:49,841 --> 00:09:51,843 And I thought that it would be great for New York. 198 00:10:01,645 --> 00:10:02,646 Do you like it? 199 00:10:03,730 --> 00:10:04,731 Yeah, I love it. 200 00:10:07,317 --> 00:10:08,985 Uh-- I do. I-- I love it. 201 00:10:08,985 --> 00:10:10,695 [mockingly] You do? You love it? 202 00:10:11,196 --> 00:10:12,197 Hey. 203 00:10:15,909 --> 00:10:16,910 Uh, it's-- 204 00:10:17,994 --> 00:10:18,995 It's long 205 00:10:19,621 --> 00:10:22,290 and subs-- substantial. 206 00:10:22,624 --> 00:10:23,625 I thought it was unique. 207 00:10:28,713 --> 00:10:29,714 I just wonder, does it-- 208 00:10:31,299 --> 00:10:32,884 Does it make more sense to get black? 209 00:10:33,385 --> 00:10:37,055 Because it's dirty in New York, and it'll probably last longer. 210 00:10:37,055 --> 00:10:38,807 And it's-- it's probably easy to exchange. 211 00:10:40,642 --> 00:10:44,020 Sure. Sure. You should have what you want, honey. 212 00:10:47,315 --> 00:10:49,734 CLARE: I hope, in your sister's death, 213 00:10:49,734 --> 00:10:52,404 you'll be able to do something that I haven't. 214 00:10:52,404 --> 00:10:54,155 Create something of her life. 215 00:10:55,657 --> 00:10:56,825 Make it beautiful. 216 00:10:58,034 --> 00:11:00,453 And then, please, tell me how you did it. 217 00:11:02,038 --> 00:11:04,124 Love, Clare. 218 00:11:05,417 --> 00:11:08,420 ♪ 219 00:11:39,826 --> 00:11:41,036 Uh, that can come down. 220 00:11:42,203 --> 00:11:46,041 You were so wasted last night. How are you even walking this morning? 221 00:11:46,041 --> 00:11:47,334 CLARE: I don't know, Shan. 222 00:11:47,334 --> 00:11:48,710 Somehow I stagger on, 223 00:11:48,710 --> 00:11:52,214 despite fielding the vitriol of an entitled millennial. 224 00:11:52,214 --> 00:11:54,674 SHAN: I mean, literally walking. 225 00:11:54,674 --> 00:11:56,593 When you fell off the stage after "Me and Bobby McGee," 226 00:11:56,593 --> 00:11:59,804 I thought you, like, broke a hip... or something. 227 00:12:02,974 --> 00:12:05,435 Would you just take the fucking sign down, Shan? Thank you. 228 00:12:06,603 --> 00:12:09,773 Oh, Bev's daughter wanted you to come by. Room 19. 229 00:12:09,773 --> 00:12:11,107 She told me it was urgent. 230 00:12:15,403 --> 00:12:17,989 - When? - Like, an hour ago. 231 00:12:18,490 --> 00:12:19,491 [Clare scoffs] 232 00:12:21,493 --> 00:12:23,245 [Clare mumbling] 233 00:12:23,245 --> 00:12:24,621 SHAN: And I'm a Zoomer. 234 00:12:27,332 --> 00:12:29,251 CLARE: Krystal, I'm so sorry to keep you waiting. 235 00:12:29,251 --> 00:12:30,335 I just got your message. 236 00:12:30,335 --> 00:12:32,170 - Did you sleep in here last night? - Uh... 237 00:12:32,170 --> 00:12:34,839 My mom said the admissions lady slept here last night. 238 00:12:39,719 --> 00:12:42,681 I know that you get lonely sometimes. 239 00:12:42,681 --> 00:12:46,393 And even though you know that I can't sleep in here, 240 00:12:46,393 --> 00:12:48,061 I will always keep you company 241 00:12:48,061 --> 00:12:51,690 and make sure you're feeling cozy and all tucked in, right? 242 00:12:51,690 --> 00:12:52,983 - Right? - Mmm. 243 00:12:54,192 --> 00:12:55,485 [whispering] It's the Alzheimer's. 244 00:12:59,656 --> 00:13:00,991 - There you go. - Thank you. 245 00:13:01,491 --> 00:13:02,576 Gentleman. 246 00:13:05,704 --> 00:13:07,414 - What? - Wow. 247 00:13:07,414 --> 00:13:09,165 CLARE: Oh, my God! 248 00:13:09,165 --> 00:13:11,710 Sam! What're you doing here? 249 00:13:11,710 --> 00:13:14,713 SAM: Oh, it's been-- CLARE: Been forever! Shit! 250 00:13:14,713 --> 00:13:16,965 - You look great! - Wha-- Oh. 251 00:13:16,965 --> 00:13:19,301 - Wait, when was the last time-- - I don't know! 252 00:13:19,301 --> 00:13:20,969 Was it, uh, Bread Loaf? 253 00:13:20,969 --> 00:13:22,929 Uh, uh, City Lights. Hannah's reading. 254 00:13:22,929 --> 00:13:24,431 Oh, fuck! Yeah. 255 00:13:25,348 --> 00:13:28,435 Aah. Wait, are you still at, uh, uh, The Believer? 256 00:13:28,435 --> 00:13:30,145 No. They folded in March. 257 00:13:30,145 --> 00:13:32,397 But I left for The Mantros years ago. 258 00:13:32,397 --> 00:13:34,858 Oh, I love The Mantros. 259 00:13:34,858 --> 00:13:37,360 Essays... Dear Sugar... 260 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:39,487 I know! I got your fan letter last night! 261 00:13:42,532 --> 00:13:43,742 You wrote in to Dear Sugar. 262 00:13:45,994 --> 00:13:46,995 I'm Sugar. 263 00:13:48,914 --> 00:13:50,999 I'll explain. Do you want to go somewhere? 264 00:13:50,999 --> 00:13:52,000 Do you still not drive? 265 00:13:53,209 --> 00:13:55,712 An advice column is easy clicks. 266 00:13:55,712 --> 00:13:59,466 But who-- who wants to get advice from some middle-aged white dude? 267 00:13:59,466 --> 00:14:02,385 I've literally been reading this column for the last three months, 268 00:14:02,385 --> 00:14:03,678 and it's fucking you? 269 00:14:03,678 --> 00:14:05,847 - How can it be you? - I'm detecting some disdain here. 270 00:14:05,847 --> 00:14:09,142 You're pretending to be a-- a woman? What? 271 00:14:09,142 --> 00:14:11,311 I know. I know! I am living a lie. 272 00:14:11,311 --> 00:14:14,147 But then... you wrote in. 273 00:14:14,147 --> 00:14:16,733 And I saw your name and I remembered your writing 274 00:14:16,733 --> 00:14:18,944 and the essay-- That fucking essay. 275 00:14:19,361 --> 00:14:23,114 And I realized that this woman that I'm pretending to be, 276 00:14:23,114 --> 00:14:26,785 you know, working class, pulled herself up by her bootstraps, 277 00:14:26,785 --> 00:14:28,203 - kinda disheveled-- - Okay. 278 00:14:28,203 --> 00:14:29,663 - She's literally you! - Okay. Okay. 279 00:14:29,663 --> 00:14:32,540 - Okay, just take a left at Elm. - You should be the one doing this. 280 00:14:33,124 --> 00:14:34,209 Doing what? 281 00:14:34,209 --> 00:14:36,753 - Being Sugar! - What? No. 282 00:14:36,753 --> 00:14:37,754 I mean, it doesn't pay. 283 00:14:37,754 --> 00:14:41,132 And-- And, you know, there's no credit 'cause it's anonymous. 284 00:14:41,132 --> 00:14:42,884 But I would be your point. 285 00:14:42,884 --> 00:14:46,513 And all you have to do is answer, like, one letter a week and-- 286 00:14:46,513 --> 00:14:48,014 Sam, stop it. 287 00:14:48,014 --> 00:14:50,058 I'm not giving anybody advice. 288 00:14:50,058 --> 00:14:54,062 My life is a fucking shit show! 289 00:14:55,689 --> 00:14:56,815 And I-- 290 00:14:56,815 --> 00:14:58,400 I'm not a writer! 291 00:14:58,400 --> 00:15:00,694 You're one of the best writers I know. 292 00:15:01,570 --> 00:15:05,365 You didn't get a book deal off of that essay for nothing. 293 00:15:05,365 --> 00:15:07,993 Doesn't count if you don't write the book. 294 00:15:07,993 --> 00:15:09,995 Everything counts, Sugar. 295 00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:13,498 Don't call me that! 296 00:15:22,632 --> 00:15:24,217 I'm sorry about your sister. 297 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:29,806 Clare, I don't have a fucking sister. I made it up. 298 00:15:29,806 --> 00:15:33,602 You made up someone having fucking cancer? 299 00:15:33,602 --> 00:15:35,103 Take a right. 300 00:15:35,103 --> 00:15:37,147 SAM: Yes, I made it all up! 301 00:15:37,147 --> 00:15:38,440 This is why I need you! 302 00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:40,400 Oh, you are the worst, Sam! 303 00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:42,235 I can't believe I almost ever slept with you. 304 00:15:42,235 --> 00:15:43,236 Pull over! 305 00:15:43,236 --> 00:15:45,238 SAM: What are you doing? CLARE: I'm-- I'm getting out. 306 00:15:45,238 --> 00:15:46,573 Wait, what do you mean, "almost"? 307 00:15:46,573 --> 00:15:48,325 We never slept together? Why not? 308 00:15:48,325 --> 00:15:50,201 'Cause you're an asshole. 309 00:15:50,201 --> 00:15:53,121 Oh, so you're done with me now? That's it? 310 00:15:53,121 --> 00:15:55,665 I have therapy. Thank you for the ride. 311 00:15:55,665 --> 00:15:58,501 - What? You're an asshole! - Okay, fine. 312 00:15:58,501 --> 00:16:00,212 SAM: No, no, no, no. Here. Wait. 313 00:16:00,212 --> 00:16:03,590 I-- I printed out the letters that I didn't answer 314 00:16:03,590 --> 00:16:05,050 because I can't-- [mumbles] 315 00:16:05,759 --> 00:16:09,471 Just... read 'em. And if you want, just answer one. 316 00:16:11,056 --> 00:16:14,309 Everyone's lives are a fucking shit show! 317 00:16:14,309 --> 00:16:16,353 People, they need help. 318 00:16:16,353 --> 00:16:20,065 You said it yourself, "Create something of her life. Make it beautiful." 319 00:16:23,401 --> 00:16:24,986 EMPLOYEE: Let me see if I can help you. 320 00:16:24,986 --> 00:16:26,529 Did you happen to save the receipt? 321 00:16:26,529 --> 00:16:29,366 I... did not save the receipt. 322 00:16:29,366 --> 00:16:31,076 It was final sale. 323 00:16:31,076 --> 00:16:33,245 EMPLOYEE: I-- I can try to look it up. 324 00:16:33,745 --> 00:16:35,038 WOMAN: I appreciate that. 325 00:16:37,666 --> 00:16:39,459 EMPLOYEE: I may need to talk to my supervisor. 326 00:16:46,007 --> 00:16:48,051 - Did it work out? - Mm-hmm. 327 00:16:48,051 --> 00:16:49,302 - It's okay? - It's okay. 328 00:16:55,475 --> 00:16:56,476 You're late. 329 00:16:56,476 --> 00:16:57,936 I'm actually two minutes early 330 00:16:57,936 --> 00:17:00,772 'cause she's always five minutes late, so. 331 00:17:00,772 --> 00:17:03,441 [phone dings] CLARE: [softly] Make sure that's off. 332 00:17:06,903 --> 00:17:08,113 Who is it? 333 00:17:09,197 --> 00:17:10,782 Hmm? DANNY: [scoffs] Lucas again? 334 00:17:14,035 --> 00:17:16,454 WOMAN: I'm glad you both are choosing to be here today. 335 00:17:18,873 --> 00:17:21,084 I know, in the past, that hasn't always been the case. 336 00:17:23,670 --> 00:17:26,464 This feels like a particularly hard moment in your marriage. 337 00:17:27,424 --> 00:17:29,426 I think a lot has been said. 338 00:17:30,594 --> 00:17:34,014 And maybe... a lot hasn't been said. 339 00:17:37,142 --> 00:17:39,936 Yeah. No, um, I-- I feel that same way. 340 00:17:40,770 --> 00:17:42,772 Honestly, it's, um... 341 00:17:44,274 --> 00:17:45,275 Uh... 342 00:17:47,736 --> 00:17:48,737 Yeah. 343 00:17:50,488 --> 00:17:53,992 Jung once said, "I am not what has happened to me. 344 00:17:54,784 --> 00:17:56,912 I am what I choose to become." 345 00:17:57,579 --> 00:17:59,331 Does that bring up anything for you, Clare? 346 00:17:59,331 --> 00:18:00,332 No. 347 00:18:00,957 --> 00:18:04,085 How long am I supposed to stay out of my own home? 348 00:18:04,085 --> 00:18:06,463 Well, how long do you think you need to stay out of your home? 349 00:18:09,132 --> 00:18:10,592 What are we doing? 350 00:18:10,592 --> 00:18:14,179 What is this space supposed to accomplish? 351 00:18:14,179 --> 00:18:18,058 Or is it just, like, one long, torturous experiment 352 00:18:18,058 --> 00:18:20,769 to slowly turn my own daughter against me? 353 00:18:20,769 --> 00:18:22,020 It was her college fund! 354 00:18:22,020 --> 00:18:23,897 Part of. That he will pay back! 355 00:18:23,897 --> 00:18:25,899 You just gave it away without even talking to me! 356 00:18:25,899 --> 00:18:27,567 What? You just thought I wouldn't notice? 357 00:18:27,567 --> 00:18:29,861 What did you want me to fucking do? Leave him homeless? 358 00:18:29,861 --> 00:18:32,864 It was our childhood home! It's my mother's house! 359 00:18:32,864 --> 00:18:35,367 He lives there! And it was underwater. 360 00:18:35,367 --> 00:18:37,077 Yeah, because he fucked up. 361 00:18:37,077 --> 00:18:38,203 Yeah, he fucks up all the time! 362 00:18:38,203 --> 00:18:39,537 Yeah, he does fuck up all the time and-- 363 00:18:39,537 --> 00:18:42,040 Yeah, fine, fine! But family takes care of family. 364 00:18:42,540 --> 00:18:43,708 I'm it for him. 365 00:18:43,708 --> 00:18:45,961 What would you do? Would you leave me on the fucking street? 366 00:18:46,711 --> 00:18:48,463 Oh! [scoffs] 367 00:18:48,463 --> 00:18:52,259 Clare, have you ever heard of the phrase "financial infidelity"? 368 00:18:52,259 --> 00:18:53,260 Oh, my God. 369 00:18:53,260 --> 00:18:57,138 It can be as destabilizing and damaging as sexual infidelity. 370 00:18:57,138 --> 00:18:58,139 Even more so. 371 00:18:58,139 --> 00:18:59,140 Yeah. Okay. 372 00:18:59,140 --> 00:19:01,017 That's not even in the same ballpark, 373 00:19:01,017 --> 00:19:02,852 - 'cause there's no betrayal here. - Right. 374 00:19:02,852 --> 00:19:04,771 I needed to take care of my brother. 375 00:19:04,771 --> 00:19:07,065 Yeah, when you do something wrong, it's-- it's different rules. 376 00:19:07,065 --> 00:19:08,358 This is not about rules. 377 00:19:08,358 --> 00:19:10,360 Not everybody comes from where you come from, 378 00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:13,905 or just-- or, you know, starts life with an even playing field. 379 00:19:13,905 --> 00:19:15,156 I'm a Black man in America. 380 00:19:15,156 --> 00:19:17,284 I know people don't come from an equal playing field, Clare. 381 00:19:17,284 --> 00:19:19,369 That's not what I mean. I'm talking about being rich! 382 00:19:19,369 --> 00:19:21,288 - I grew up middle class. - Yeah, that's rich. 383 00:19:21,288 --> 00:19:24,207 What do you want me to say? My brother's a fuck-up. I'm a fuck-up. 384 00:19:24,207 --> 00:19:25,375 Okay, I'm an awful person. 385 00:19:25,375 --> 00:19:27,210 I'm awful. I'm horrible. That's it. 386 00:19:27,210 --> 00:19:29,254 I don't know what to say. I don't know what to fucking say. 387 00:19:29,921 --> 00:19:31,673 Let's just start with how you're feeling, hm? 388 00:19:31,673 --> 00:19:35,594 I am feeling hungry. I am feeling tired. 389 00:19:35,594 --> 00:19:37,888 I'm feeling like a shell of a person. 390 00:19:37,888 --> 00:19:40,724 - Like I'm staring into an abyss-- - I get it. 391 00:19:43,101 --> 00:19:44,686 I mean, I'm not there yet, 392 00:19:44,686 --> 00:19:48,064 but I think it's really common for women your age to feel this way. 393 00:19:48,064 --> 00:19:49,357 You've spoken before 394 00:19:49,357 --> 00:19:51,568 about your insecurities with getting older-- 395 00:19:51,568 --> 00:19:53,820 I thought we were talking about me giving money to my brother. 396 00:19:53,820 --> 00:19:56,615 - And with the age gap between you and Danny-- - It's not that big. 397 00:19:56,615 --> 00:20:00,035 And the way our society treats women over 50 as irrelevant-- 398 00:20:00,035 --> 00:20:01,745 - I'm 49! - You'll be 50 in a month. 399 00:20:01,745 --> 00:20:05,290 Women over 50 are treated as if they are barely sexual beings. 400 00:20:05,290 --> 00:20:09,794 Their beauty is fading, or at least our conventional ideas of beauty. 401 00:20:09,794 --> 00:20:11,755 Because of that, their power wanes. 402 00:20:11,755 --> 00:20:16,009 Their wants and desires are considered as an afterthought. 403 00:20:16,843 --> 00:20:17,844 Okay. 404 00:20:22,641 --> 00:20:23,642 [keys jingle] 405 00:20:41,451 --> 00:20:42,452 Oh. 406 00:20:48,291 --> 00:20:50,293 [muffled conversation] 407 00:21:00,136 --> 00:21:02,722 [Danny speaking indistinctly] 408 00:21:02,722 --> 00:21:04,724 ♪ 409 00:21:08,728 --> 00:21:10,146 I mean, it's therapy! 410 00:21:10,146 --> 00:21:13,441 It's not office hours. You don't stick around after class! 411 00:21:13,441 --> 00:21:17,112 You know, that's like a cesspool full of bacteria, right? 412 00:21:17,112 --> 00:21:20,198 Okay, why don't you ask your hot dishwasher to clean it out? 413 00:21:20,824 --> 00:21:23,118 Oh, well, maybe I will. 414 00:21:24,744 --> 00:21:25,787 - Hello. - There you go. 415 00:21:25,787 --> 00:21:26,871 Oh, my God! 416 00:21:26,871 --> 00:21:27,872 WOMAN: Thank you. 417 00:21:27,872 --> 00:21:29,541 [woman laughing] 418 00:21:29,541 --> 00:21:30,834 Jesus Christ, Amy! 419 00:21:30,834 --> 00:21:32,836 [Amy snickering] 420 00:21:33,336 --> 00:21:34,838 I'm naughty! 421 00:21:34,838 --> 00:21:36,673 Uh, are they having sex? 422 00:21:36,673 --> 00:21:38,258 They-- Do they wanna have sex? 423 00:21:38,967 --> 00:21:43,513 Is couple's therapy some, you know, sick psycho foreplay 424 00:21:43,513 --> 00:21:47,392 where they're just telepathically jerking each other off in front of me? 425 00:21:47,392 --> 00:21:50,896 And... is my insurance paying for it? 426 00:21:50,896 --> 00:21:53,940 Oh, my God! Maybe I should be a couple's therapist. 427 00:21:53,940 --> 00:21:55,650 CLARE: I mean, I'm the one who found her! 428 00:21:55,650 --> 00:21:58,153 He didn't even wanna go! And now he's like, what-- He's what? 429 00:21:58,153 --> 00:22:00,405 He's, like, fucking some woman 430 00:22:00,405 --> 00:22:05,452 who decorates her office with gnomes grabbing their own weird stone vaginas? 431 00:22:05,452 --> 00:22:07,662 Okay. Danny loves you. 432 00:22:07,662 --> 00:22:12,292 He's not fucking his therapist or any stone, uh, vaginas, okay? 433 00:22:13,835 --> 00:22:16,129 She called me barely a woman. 434 00:22:19,007 --> 00:22:20,634 Am I barely a woman? 435 00:22:20,634 --> 00:22:22,552 I mean, she probably said it to get laid. 436 00:22:22,552 --> 00:22:25,263 Thanks, Amy. AMY: Hang in there. 437 00:22:33,563 --> 00:22:34,564 Thanks. 438 00:22:48,703 --> 00:22:49,704 Hey. 439 00:22:51,081 --> 00:22:52,082 Hey. 440 00:22:56,211 --> 00:22:58,213 ♪ 441 00:23:04,010 --> 00:23:05,011 [softly] Hey. 442 00:23:06,221 --> 00:23:09,224 ♪ 443 00:23:21,027 --> 00:23:24,364 [young Clare moaning] 444 00:23:35,584 --> 00:23:37,794 [Clare grunting] Okay. 445 00:23:37,794 --> 00:23:39,087 MAN: I can't get it in. 446 00:23:39,087 --> 00:23:41,506 No, it's because, uh-- It's-- it's-- The angle is wrong 447 00:23:42,716 --> 00:23:43,842 Okay, yeah, maybe we-- 448 00:23:43,842 --> 00:23:44,968 - Yeah. - Yeah, let's go. 449 00:23:45,844 --> 00:23:46,970 [squishing] 450 00:23:46,970 --> 00:23:49,347 What the f-- Wait, what the fuck is happening? 451 00:23:49,931 --> 00:23:51,683 Wait, is this a waterbed? 452 00:23:51,683 --> 00:23:53,935 Oh, my God! [laughing] Oh, my God. 453 00:23:53,935 --> 00:23:56,271 Am I in 1979? 454 00:23:56,271 --> 00:24:00,275 Am I in a-- Am I trapped in a fucking Steely Dan song? 455 00:24:00,275 --> 00:24:02,235 Oh, my God. 456 00:24:03,111 --> 00:24:05,530 - Oh, my God. Oh, my God. - What? 457 00:24:05,530 --> 00:24:09,284 [Clare laughing and crying] 458 00:24:10,535 --> 00:24:12,913 - Oh, my God. - Are you okay? 459 00:24:12,913 --> 00:24:15,790 [Clare crying] 460 00:24:15,790 --> 00:24:18,668 I am not okay. 461 00:24:20,295 --> 00:24:21,504 Wait, are you married? 462 00:24:22,172 --> 00:24:24,633 - What the-- - The ring on your finger? 463 00:24:25,550 --> 00:24:28,720 Are you gonna fucking judge me? You have a fucking waterbed! 464 00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:29,721 So? 465 00:24:34,434 --> 00:24:36,186 And I like Steely Dan. 466 00:24:37,270 --> 00:24:38,897 Well, they're a great band. 467 00:24:49,783 --> 00:24:51,368 [phone chimes] 468 00:25:05,006 --> 00:25:08,009 ♪ 469 00:25:27,362 --> 00:25:28,738 WOMAN: Dear Sugar, 470 00:25:28,738 --> 00:25:31,032 I'm 22, and my question is short. 471 00:25:32,075 --> 00:25:33,910 What would you tell your 20-something self 472 00:25:33,910 --> 00:25:35,287 if you could talk to her now? 473 00:25:36,371 --> 00:25:38,248 Love, Seeking Wisdom. 474 00:25:40,458 --> 00:25:43,461 ♪ 475 00:25:45,672 --> 00:25:46,715 CLARE: 476 00:25:50,677 --> 00:25:51,678 Dear... 477 00:25:56,308 --> 00:25:58,101 Dear Seeking Wisdom. 478 00:25:59,185 --> 00:26:01,980 What would I tell my 22-year-old self? 479 00:26:03,523 --> 00:26:05,859 I'd say, stop worrying whether you're fat. 480 00:26:06,568 --> 00:26:08,403 Feed yourself, literally. 481 00:26:09,571 --> 00:26:13,742 The people worthy of your love will love you more for this. 482 00:26:18,538 --> 00:26:23,335 I'd also say that most things will be okay eventually, 483 00:26:24,878 --> 00:26:26,129 but not everything. 484 00:26:31,885 --> 00:26:33,845 One afternoon in your 20s, 485 00:26:33,845 --> 00:26:37,182 when you've gotten yourself ridiculously tangled up with heroin, 486 00:26:37,182 --> 00:26:40,977 you'll be riding the bus and thinking what a worthless piece of shit you are. 487 00:26:42,395 --> 00:26:44,773 A little girl will get on the bus with her mother, 488 00:26:44,773 --> 00:26:46,858 holding the strings of two purple balloons. 489 00:26:47,609 --> 00:26:50,612 She will offer you one of the balloons, but you won't take it 490 00:26:50,612 --> 00:26:52,989 because you believe you no longer have a right 491 00:26:52,989 --> 00:26:55,242 to such tiny beautiful things. 492 00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:01,081 You're wrong. 493 00:27:04,167 --> 00:27:05,168 You do. 494 00:27:07,462 --> 00:27:12,092 EMPLOYEE: That's $127.62. I'm so sorry. 495 00:27:12,092 --> 00:27:14,678 CLARE: And someday, you'll look back on that one Christmas, 496 00:27:14,678 --> 00:27:17,013 when your mother gave you a mustard-yellow coat 497 00:27:17,013 --> 00:27:19,182 that she'd saved for months to buy. 498 00:27:21,268 --> 00:27:24,271 ♪ 499 00:27:27,857 --> 00:27:28,942 Don't hold it up and say 500 00:27:28,942 --> 00:27:30,735 it's longer than you like your coats to be, 501 00:27:30,735 --> 00:27:34,614 and too puffy, and possibly even too warm. 502 00:27:36,575 --> 00:27:38,910 Because your mother will be dead by spring... 503 00:27:38,910 --> 00:27:39,911 [door opens] 504 00:27:41,079 --> 00:27:43,498 ...and that coat will be the last gift she ever gave you. 505 00:27:44,874 --> 00:27:45,875 Are you okay? 506 00:27:50,463 --> 00:27:51,840 I love you. [sniffles] 507 00:27:53,341 --> 00:27:54,843 You know that, right? 508 00:27:54,843 --> 00:27:57,345 Ab-- About the money, it's-- it's not gone. 509 00:27:57,345 --> 00:27:58,889 It's not about the money. 510 00:27:58,889 --> 00:27:59,890 Then what? 511 00:28:04,185 --> 00:28:05,478 Do you want me to bring that in? 512 00:28:11,693 --> 00:28:13,862 CLARE: And you will regret the small thing you didn't say 513 00:28:13,862 --> 00:28:14,988 for the rest of your life. 514 00:28:15,906 --> 00:28:16,907 RAE: Have a good night. 515 00:28:19,200 --> 00:28:20,201 You too. 516 00:28:20,201 --> 00:28:23,747 When a gift is given, say thank you. 517 00:28:23,747 --> 00:28:24,748 Mom? 518 00:28:30,879 --> 00:28:31,880 You dropped something. 519 00:28:33,256 --> 00:28:37,510 CLARE: When a gift is given, say thank you. 520 00:28:44,226 --> 00:28:46,770 When a gift... is given... 521 00:28:49,564 --> 00:28:50,815 [door closes] 522 00:28:50,815 --> 00:28:51,816 Thank you. 523 00:28:56,988 --> 00:28:59,991 ♪ 524 00:29:01,451 --> 00:29:05,163 ♪ I'm trying to tell you something 'bout my life ♪ 525 00:29:06,706 --> 00:29:11,169 ♪ Maybe give me insight between black and white ♪ 526 00:29:11,169 --> 00:29:14,923 ♪ And the best thing that you ever done for me ♪ 527 00:29:16,174 --> 00:29:19,928 ♪ Is to help me take my life less seriously ♪ 528 00:29:19,928 --> 00:29:22,681 ♪ It's only life after all ♪ 529 00:29:26,059 --> 00:29:28,520 ♪ I went to the doctor ♪ 530 00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:30,939 ♪ I went to the mountains ♪ 531 00:29:30,939 --> 00:29:33,400 ♪ I looked to the children ♪ 532 00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:35,860 ♪ I drank from the fountains ♪ 533 00:29:35,860 --> 00:29:39,614 ♪ There's more than one answer to these questions ♪ 534 00:29:39,614 --> 00:29:42,200 ♪ Pointing me in a crooked line ♪ 535 00:29:43,118 --> 00:29:46,913 ♪ And the less I seek my source ♪ 536 00:29:46,913 --> 00:29:51,167 ♪ The closer I am to fine ♪ 537 00:29:52,127 --> 00:30:02,012 ♪ Closer I am to fine ♪