1 00:00:01,043 --> 00:00:04,673 ♪ I'm a fool to do your dirty work ♪ 2 00:00:04,673 --> 00:00:06,550 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 3 00:00:07,509 --> 00:00:11,179 ♪ I don't wanna do your dirty work ♪ 4 00:00:11,179 --> 00:00:13,056 ♪ No more ♪ 5 00:00:14,057 --> 00:00:15,684 [phone chimes] 6 00:00:19,229 --> 00:00:20,522 WOMAN 1: Dear Sugar. 7 00:00:20,522 --> 00:00:22,399 I'm supposed to be getting married in a month. 8 00:00:22,941 --> 00:00:25,110 My fiancé is amazing, 9 00:00:25,110 --> 00:00:26,570 but I don't wanna go through with it. 10 00:00:26,570 --> 00:00:27,571 WOMAN 2: Dear Sugar. 11 00:00:27,571 --> 00:00:29,364 My wife and I just bought our first house, 12 00:00:29,364 --> 00:00:30,782 and I know I should be happy. 13 00:00:30,782 --> 00:00:32,324 But after she goes to work, 14 00:00:32,324 --> 00:00:34,744 I just sit in it and cry. 15 00:00:34,744 --> 00:00:35,954 WOMAN 3: Dear Sugar. 16 00:00:35,954 --> 00:00:37,998 I've been a good wife for 25 years. 17 00:00:37,998 --> 00:00:41,126 But for 25 of those years, I'd wanted to leave. 18 00:00:41,751 --> 00:00:43,295 WOMAN 1: What do I do? WOMAN 2: When is it okay to go? 19 00:00:43,295 --> 00:00:44,629 WOMAN 3: Do you think I should stay? 20 00:00:45,297 --> 00:00:46,298 DANNY: What are you reading? 21 00:00:46,673 --> 00:00:48,508 Uh, nothing. 22 00:01:02,856 --> 00:01:04,691 How about five stars this time? 23 00:01:04,691 --> 00:01:06,526 How about you go fuck yourself? 24 00:01:12,991 --> 00:01:13,992 Dear Sugar. 25 00:01:16,369 --> 00:01:18,079 I'm a messed-up woman. 26 00:01:19,205 --> 00:01:20,790 I've been married twice. 27 00:01:22,042 --> 00:01:23,209 I'm dishonest, 28 00:01:24,169 --> 00:01:25,170 impulsive, 29 00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:27,422 unhappy, 30 00:01:28,798 --> 00:01:29,799 jealous, 31 00:01:32,093 --> 00:01:33,094 and lonely. 32 00:01:33,803 --> 00:01:35,639 [waterbed sloshing] 33 00:01:36,223 --> 00:01:39,935 And I have no right to give advice 34 00:01:40,644 --> 00:01:41,853 to anyone. 35 00:01:41,853 --> 00:01:44,231 [water draining] 36 00:01:45,357 --> 00:01:46,608 [sighs] 37 00:01:52,697 --> 00:01:53,698 [knock on door] 38 00:01:54,783 --> 00:01:55,784 [door opens] 39 00:01:59,329 --> 00:02:01,122 RAE: Um, guys? 40 00:02:04,125 --> 00:02:07,337 - Oh! Hey. Hey. - Shit. [clears throat] Hey, Rae. 41 00:02:08,838 --> 00:02:09,839 RAE: Here. 42 00:02:11,383 --> 00:02:13,885 It's from Uncle Lucas. He paid you back. 43 00:02:17,639 --> 00:02:19,849 So now you guys can stop fighting. 44 00:02:19,849 --> 00:02:21,893 Or maybe you already have. 45 00:02:27,857 --> 00:02:29,442 Okay, I can't get anything else out of her, 46 00:02:29,442 --> 00:02:30,986 but something's off. 47 00:02:30,986 --> 00:02:34,281 Why the hell would Lucas trust a friend to drop off 15 grand? 48 00:02:34,281 --> 00:02:35,574 Have you seen my Hayes letter? 49 00:02:35,574 --> 00:02:37,117 I-- I keep it in a book, 50 00:02:37,117 --> 00:02:38,910 - and now I can't find the book. - No. 51 00:02:38,910 --> 00:02:40,287 I need it for the retreat. 52 00:02:40,287 --> 00:02:41,788 And now Rae's acting all cagey. 53 00:02:42,205 --> 00:02:44,124 Wait. I found it. Ah! Good. 54 00:02:44,541 --> 00:02:46,751 Hey, I want to know who the hell was at my house last night. 55 00:02:46,751 --> 00:02:49,337 - Don't you? - Danny. Lucas paid us back. 56 00:02:49,337 --> 00:02:50,505 Rae's not screaming at me. 57 00:02:50,505 --> 00:02:52,799 We had sex for the first time in months! 58 00:02:52,799 --> 00:02:55,343 Everything is good! Things are good! 59 00:02:56,469 --> 00:02:58,555 What was up with that Uber driver last night? 60 00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:03,101 [car honking] 61 00:03:03,518 --> 00:03:05,896 Oh. That's-- That's Amy. 62 00:03:05,896 --> 00:03:09,065 So I will see you tomorrow night. 63 00:03:09,065 --> 00:03:10,066 So you're leaving? 64 00:03:10,066 --> 00:03:11,234 Right now? In the middle of this? 65 00:03:12,652 --> 00:03:13,904 In the middle of what? 66 00:03:14,905 --> 00:03:17,324 Danny, there is no middle. There is no "this." 67 00:03:18,950 --> 00:03:21,661 Hey, everything is good. 68 00:03:21,661 --> 00:03:22,913 Okay? 69 00:03:22,913 --> 00:03:23,914 It's good. 70 00:03:25,916 --> 00:03:27,334 Sorry. Hi. AMY: Mama, hustle! 71 00:03:27,334 --> 00:03:29,294 What-- Were you looking for that Hayes letter? 72 00:03:29,294 --> 00:03:32,005 - Hi. - Hi. Hi. Hi. 73 00:03:32,589 --> 00:03:36,009 Okay. So I got jerky. 74 00:03:36,009 --> 00:03:38,428 - I got CBD lollies. - Whoo! 75 00:03:38,428 --> 00:03:40,013 Oh, my God, what's wrong? 76 00:03:40,847 --> 00:03:42,557 Nothing. Everything. I don't know. 77 00:03:43,099 --> 00:03:44,517 - Let's just go. - Okay. 78 00:03:45,101 --> 00:03:47,520 ♪ Even The Losers by Tom Petty playing ♪ 79 00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:50,440 [women singing along] ♪ Baby, even the losers ♪ 80 00:03:52,108 --> 00:03:54,819 ♪ Get lucky sometimes ♪ 81 00:03:54,819 --> 00:03:56,238 ♪ Oh-ho! ♪ 82 00:03:57,113 --> 00:03:59,699 I never want to see another blue book in my life! 83 00:03:59,699 --> 00:04:01,117 At least until next quarter. 84 00:04:01,117 --> 00:04:03,370 - Oh, we should celebrate. - Yes! 85 00:04:03,370 --> 00:04:04,537 Let's drive to Mexico. 86 00:04:04,537 --> 00:04:06,122 Well, that's kind of far. 87 00:04:06,122 --> 00:04:07,791 Come on, Mom. It's spring break. 88 00:04:07,791 --> 00:04:10,460 Would you settle for Dairy Queen on Route 4? 89 00:04:13,588 --> 00:04:14,589 How about this? 90 00:04:15,173 --> 00:04:16,424 We will save up, 91 00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:18,260 and then spring break, senior year, 92 00:04:18,260 --> 00:04:19,511 we'll go somewhere great. 93 00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:20,845 Yeah! 94 00:04:21,721 --> 00:04:23,515 Yeah, okay. Uh, we've got-- 95 00:04:23,515 --> 00:04:25,225 - We've got two years to save. - Mm-hmm. 96 00:04:26,142 --> 00:04:27,143 Where should we go? 97 00:04:28,144 --> 00:04:30,230 Machu Picchu is supposed to be incredible. 98 00:04:30,230 --> 00:04:31,606 The Inca Trail? 99 00:04:31,606 --> 00:04:34,609 I was thinking less hiking, more margaritas. 100 00:04:34,609 --> 00:04:35,652 [thudding] 101 00:04:35,652 --> 00:04:37,612 [metal clanking] 102 00:04:43,785 --> 00:04:45,412 Hey, wh-- what are you doing? 103 00:04:45,412 --> 00:04:46,413 Documenting. 104 00:04:46,830 --> 00:04:47,998 Okay. Uh, well, 105 00:04:48,623 --> 00:04:49,624 I'm Jess. 106 00:04:49,624 --> 00:04:51,793 Uh, well, you're a terrible driver, Jess. 107 00:04:51,793 --> 00:04:54,129 Huh! Uh, I wasn't-- I wasn't driving. 108 00:04:54,129 --> 00:04:57,424 Right. You were just sitting there, not moving. 109 00:04:57,424 --> 00:04:59,885 I mean, who's gonna pay for this? JESS: Well, you were driving. 110 00:04:59,885 --> 00:05:01,887 Honey, it was our fault. 111 00:05:03,054 --> 00:05:04,306 No, no, Mom. 112 00:05:04,306 --> 00:05:07,726 It's gonna take us both working doubles to cover this. 113 00:05:08,685 --> 00:05:10,145 We're never gonna make it to Mexico! 114 00:05:10,145 --> 00:05:13,732 Uh, well-- You know what? My father knows a guy, a mechanic. 115 00:05:13,732 --> 00:05:15,817 You wanna... give me your number? 116 00:05:15,817 --> 00:05:16,818 I can see if he could... 117 00:05:17,485 --> 00:05:19,279 I don't know, like, hook you up or something. 118 00:05:23,283 --> 00:05:26,453 You know, why not? Worth a shot. 119 00:05:28,622 --> 00:05:29,623 Yep. 120 00:05:33,335 --> 00:05:36,254 Unless this is just some ploy to... get my number. 121 00:05:36,254 --> 00:05:37,589 No. No way. 122 00:05:37,589 --> 00:05:40,258 It's the mechanic. Uh-- So I'm gonna get you a mechanic. 123 00:05:44,304 --> 00:05:45,597 - Cool. - Yep. 124 00:05:46,014 --> 00:05:48,975 [exhales] This writer's retreat is the best birthday present 125 00:05:48,975 --> 00:05:50,560 that anyone has ever given me. 126 00:05:50,560 --> 00:05:56,107 Aw! Well, you only have two sad little days left of your 40s. 127 00:05:56,107 --> 00:05:58,777 - Oh, my God. - So you gotta go big or go home. 128 00:06:00,195 --> 00:06:02,072 - That's what they say. - Oh, God. 129 00:06:02,072 --> 00:06:05,742 "Legendary British author Hayes MacKeown 130 00:06:05,742 --> 00:06:09,120 "leads this penetrating workshop 131 00:06:09,955 --> 00:06:14,417 featuring a master craftsman working at the height of his powers." 132 00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:16,628 Oh, "height of his powers"? Jesus! 133 00:06:16,628 --> 00:06:18,255 Like, they'd ever say that about a woman. 134 00:06:20,465 --> 00:06:21,967 Hey. So I have some news. 135 00:06:22,551 --> 00:06:23,468 What? 136 00:06:23,468 --> 00:06:27,389 Uh... Okay, I heard from my agents. Finally. 137 00:06:27,389 --> 00:06:29,307 Okay. Okay. I'm so sorry. 138 00:06:29,307 --> 00:06:33,103 And Random House is making an offer which... 139 00:06:33,103 --> 00:06:34,104 Oh, my God. 140 00:06:35,647 --> 00:06:37,983 - Wait! Oh, my God! - Right? 141 00:06:37,983 --> 00:06:39,985 - Oh, my God! - It's not even that much money but it-- 142 00:06:39,985 --> 00:06:41,069 CLARE: Who cares? I mean-- 143 00:06:41,069 --> 00:06:42,237 It doesn't matter about the money. 144 00:06:42,237 --> 00:06:43,363 - It's just like-- - Yeah. 145 00:06:43,363 --> 00:06:46,074 Out of curiosity, just how-- I mean, I wonder how much-- 146 00:06:46,074 --> 00:06:48,868 Like, I think they said 85K. 147 00:06:48,868 --> 00:06:51,371 - $85,000? - Yeah. But, uh-- 148 00:06:51,371 --> 00:06:53,707 - Holy shit, Amy! - I know. 149 00:06:53,707 --> 00:06:55,083 And guess what? CLARE: What? 150 00:06:55,083 --> 00:06:57,168 I guess there's some interest in the screen rights. 151 00:06:57,168 --> 00:06:59,546 - Wow! - I know! What! 152 00:06:59,546 --> 00:07:04,217 Wow! Oh, my God. Wow. I am-- Whoa! 153 00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:10,807 Oh, my God. This place! 154 00:07:11,808 --> 00:07:13,643 Not. Too. Shabby. 155 00:07:14,895 --> 00:07:16,980 Thank God they do a sliding scale, right? 156 00:07:16,980 --> 00:07:18,565 [Amy laughing] 157 00:07:18,565 --> 00:07:20,984 Amy? Amy! AMY: Oh, my God. 158 00:07:20,984 --> 00:07:22,485 I just heard the news! 159 00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:26,448 [both squealing, laughing] 160 00:07:26,448 --> 00:07:30,243 Shut up, shut up, shut up! You are a goddamn goddess. 161 00:07:31,119 --> 00:07:34,247 I'll just-- I'll just sign us-- Or, you know, check us in. 162 00:07:36,708 --> 00:07:38,209 I am so excited for you. 163 00:07:42,464 --> 00:07:43,465 - CLARE: Hi. - Hi. 164 00:07:43,465 --> 00:07:47,052 I'm just here to, uh, check in Clare Pierce and Amy Adler. 165 00:07:47,052 --> 00:07:48,178 Yes. 166 00:07:48,178 --> 00:07:52,557 You're in "The Empty Chair: Writing About Abandonment." 167 00:07:53,266 --> 00:07:54,267 Yay! 168 00:07:54,267 --> 00:07:55,352 CLARE: Uh, no, no, no. 169 00:07:55,352 --> 00:07:58,730 We're in Hayes MacKeown, "The Story Within." 170 00:07:59,314 --> 00:08:00,941 You're definitely "Abandonment." 171 00:08:00,941 --> 00:08:03,276 No, we're literally here for Hayes-- 172 00:08:03,276 --> 00:08:05,195 But you're literally in "The Empty Chair." 173 00:08:05,195 --> 00:08:07,530 Yeah. "Empty Chair," yeah. No, that's us. Yeah. 174 00:08:07,530 --> 00:08:09,449 Like I said. Let me get your welcome packets. 175 00:08:09,449 --> 00:08:10,700 Mm. Thank you. 176 00:08:12,244 --> 00:08:13,495 [clears throat] Can I see this? 177 00:08:13,495 --> 00:08:16,957 - Why are-- - So, okay, there's a, um, thing 178 00:08:16,957 --> 00:08:19,876 which is that the Hayes' workshop sold out in, like, two seconds. 179 00:08:19,876 --> 00:08:21,545 So, um, there's a loophole, 180 00:08:21,545 --> 00:08:23,463 which is that we take the Abandonment workshop, 181 00:08:23,463 --> 00:08:25,298 we say we hate it, and then we switch. 182 00:08:25,298 --> 00:08:28,134 We're gonna abandon the Abandonment workshop? 183 00:08:28,134 --> 00:08:29,511 Mm-hmm. Yeah. 184 00:08:29,511 --> 00:08:30,762 MAN: So, Clare, what'll it be? 185 00:08:30,762 --> 00:08:31,846 Sancerre or Rhône? 186 00:08:31,846 --> 00:08:34,766 Um... red. Red's-- red's fine. 187 00:08:34,766 --> 00:08:36,726 Did you hear that, Joan? We have another hot earther. 188 00:08:36,726 --> 00:08:38,895 I hope you like beef bourguignon, Clare. 189 00:08:38,895 --> 00:08:39,896 It's good. 190 00:08:42,857 --> 00:08:44,442 I-- I love your paintings. 191 00:08:46,069 --> 00:08:47,779 When we were in grad school, 192 00:08:47,779 --> 00:08:50,740 we decided we would buy one piece of art a year. 193 00:08:50,740 --> 00:08:52,367 Art being very loosely defined. 194 00:08:52,367 --> 00:08:54,286 Uh, Clare's mom is something of an artist. 195 00:08:54,286 --> 00:08:55,870 CLARE: Mm. No, not-- not like this. 196 00:08:55,870 --> 00:08:59,874 Come on, I mean, everything Clare has is practically handmade by her. 197 00:08:59,874 --> 00:09:01,543 I mean, she basically built your house. 198 00:09:01,543 --> 00:09:02,544 Is she an architect? 199 00:09:03,003 --> 00:09:04,129 No, she's a waitress. 200 00:09:05,463 --> 00:09:06,756 I waited tables in college. 201 00:09:06,756 --> 00:09:09,175 I think it's something everyone should do once in their life, don't you? 202 00:09:09,676 --> 00:09:11,595 She's in college too, actually. 203 00:09:12,554 --> 00:09:13,555 With me. 204 00:09:13,555 --> 00:09:15,390 - JOAN: Oh, you're kidding. - Good for her. 205 00:09:15,390 --> 00:09:17,559 That's-- It-- It's never too late, right? 206 00:09:17,559 --> 00:09:18,810 I wanted to be Ruth Ginsburg. 207 00:09:19,311 --> 00:09:21,313 Jess, what if I came to law school with you next year? 208 00:09:21,313 --> 00:09:23,106 Would you die? [laughs] 209 00:09:27,027 --> 00:09:28,278 Well, actually, I was, uh... 210 00:09:28,987 --> 00:09:30,697 I was thinking-- Well, we were thinking... 211 00:09:31,615 --> 00:09:34,451 that I might, uh, defer a year 212 00:09:34,451 --> 00:09:35,744 to do some traveling abroad. 213 00:09:37,704 --> 00:09:38,705 I'm sorry? 214 00:09:38,705 --> 00:09:40,999 Clare's applying to a semester in Dublin, 215 00:09:40,999 --> 00:09:42,292 so we-- we thought it might be fun 216 00:09:42,292 --> 00:09:45,170 if we both stayed on a bit longer, right? Yeah. 217 00:09:45,795 --> 00:09:46,796 Huh. 218 00:09:47,756 --> 00:09:48,757 I'm just gonna use the, 219 00:09:49,299 --> 00:09:52,135 uh, bathroom. JESS: Oh, the bathroom? It's-- Just go out to the left. 220 00:09:52,135 --> 00:09:53,970 Welcome, writers. 221 00:09:57,140 --> 00:09:58,516 Take a look at this chair. 222 00:09:58,516 --> 00:10:00,435 [softly] Wow, they really took this whole 223 00:10:00,435 --> 00:10:01,811 empty-chair thing very literally. 224 00:10:01,811 --> 00:10:03,271 WOMAN: How does it make you feel? 225 00:10:06,024 --> 00:10:09,361 What memories does it call up in you? 226 00:10:10,737 --> 00:10:12,364 In this writing workshop, 227 00:10:12,364 --> 00:10:14,366 we'll explore abandonment 228 00:10:14,366 --> 00:10:17,786 as it relates to ourselves and our characters. 229 00:10:17,786 --> 00:10:19,246 And we'll do it safely, 230 00:10:20,247 --> 00:10:21,414 in a circle of trust. 231 00:10:21,414 --> 00:10:23,333 [softly] We're just gonna stay for one minute, 232 00:10:23,333 --> 00:10:24,960 and then we can bail and go to Hayes. 233 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,378 - Okay? Yeah. - [softly] We can't do this. 234 00:10:26,378 --> 00:10:28,713 Oh, but also, he's with Random House too. 235 00:10:28,713 --> 00:10:31,091 So I wanna ask him about an editor. 236 00:10:31,091 --> 00:10:33,468 Ladies, everyone... 237 00:10:33,468 --> 00:10:34,511 Sorry. 238 00:10:34,511 --> 00:10:36,555 WOMAN: Maybe we weren't held... 239 00:10:36,555 --> 00:10:38,265 [softly] We can't just leave after a minute. 240 00:10:38,265 --> 00:10:40,100 We have to stay a little bit longer or it would be rude. 241 00:10:40,934 --> 00:10:45,021 ...maybe you weren't invited to that birthday party because... 242 00:10:46,022 --> 00:10:49,401 everybody knew that you always wore a T-shirt over your bathing suit. 243 00:10:50,485 --> 00:10:52,571 - Fuck it. Let's go now. - No, we can't-- 244 00:10:52,571 --> 00:10:55,156 - Let's go. Come on. Let's go. - Stop. You're not gonna leave me-- 245 00:10:55,156 --> 00:10:57,617 Come on. I'm not staying. Come on. 246 00:10:57,617 --> 00:10:58,660 Amy! 247 00:11:01,246 --> 00:11:02,414 [door opens] 248 00:11:02,414 --> 00:11:03,748 I'm sorry. 249 00:11:03,748 --> 00:11:04,749 [door closes] 250 00:11:05,584 --> 00:11:08,670 Let's begin by closing our eyes 251 00:11:08,670 --> 00:11:13,884 and remembering a time we emotionally abandoned ourselves. 252 00:11:21,975 --> 00:11:23,476 JESS: [chuckling] I should've known. 253 00:11:26,021 --> 00:11:27,147 [softly] I love this room. 254 00:11:27,939 --> 00:11:29,983 All these... books! 255 00:11:29,983 --> 00:11:31,109 Oh, you should take that one. 256 00:11:31,693 --> 00:11:34,654 Hayes MacKeown. Oh, my mom reads everything he writes. 257 00:11:36,573 --> 00:11:39,034 CLARE: And this ladder. I've only seen them in the movies. 258 00:11:39,034 --> 00:11:42,746 I didn't know normal people had bookcases with ladders! 259 00:11:42,746 --> 00:11:44,164 JESS: You think my parents are normal? 260 00:11:44,164 --> 00:11:45,165 Yes. 261 00:11:46,791 --> 00:11:48,001 They think you're just with some... 262 00:11:49,419 --> 00:11:51,379 - backwoods... - What? 263 00:11:51,379 --> 00:11:53,381 - Why did I wear this dress? - Stop. 264 00:11:53,381 --> 00:11:54,382 You're perfect. 265 00:11:57,177 --> 00:11:58,220 When... 266 00:11:58,637 --> 00:11:59,888 do you think we should tell them? 267 00:12:00,472 --> 00:12:01,473 Tell them what? 268 00:12:01,473 --> 00:12:02,849 JESS: That we're engaged. 269 00:12:05,977 --> 00:12:06,978 What? 270 00:12:09,731 --> 00:12:10,732 We should get married. 271 00:12:11,316 --> 00:12:12,317 No. 272 00:12:12,984 --> 00:12:14,861 Well, we've only been together, like-- 273 00:12:15,946 --> 00:12:17,739 We've only been together, like, three months. 274 00:12:17,739 --> 00:12:18,740 JESS: I-- I don't care. 275 00:12:21,326 --> 00:12:22,619 I don't. I want us to... 276 00:12:24,704 --> 00:12:27,290 I want us to spend our lives together. 277 00:12:28,458 --> 00:12:29,626 And then one day, we'll... 278 00:12:31,545 --> 00:12:32,546 We'll have our own house, 279 00:12:32,546 --> 00:12:34,172 and-- and it'll be full of... 280 00:12:35,382 --> 00:12:38,426 - art and so many books... - Books. 281 00:12:38,426 --> 00:12:40,470 ...and as many ladders as you want. 282 00:12:44,391 --> 00:12:45,600 Are you being serious? 283 00:12:48,353 --> 00:12:49,771 Uh... 284 00:12:49,771 --> 00:12:50,981 - If you say yes, yeah. - Yeah, right. 285 00:12:54,192 --> 00:12:56,194 [indistinct chatter] 286 00:12:58,947 --> 00:13:01,575 MAN: You kinda-- You wanna unlive that. You know what I mean? 287 00:13:02,242 --> 00:13:04,619 However, it does beg the question, 288 00:13:04,619 --> 00:13:07,998 this is-- this is probably gonna be a plotline for the next one, 289 00:13:07,998 --> 00:13:10,250 if I ever do a next one 'cause why the fuck would I bother? 290 00:13:10,250 --> 00:13:12,002 But that being said... 291 00:13:12,919 --> 00:13:13,920 Excuse me? 292 00:13:16,464 --> 00:13:19,759 Oh, hi. I'm so sorry, but I'm just gonna sneak in there. 293 00:13:19,759 --> 00:13:21,678 No. You-- You can't. It's full. 294 00:13:23,597 --> 00:13:25,640 No one's gonna know if I go in there. 295 00:13:25,640 --> 00:13:28,935 I tried my workshop, but it's just-- It's not a great fit for me. 296 00:13:28,935 --> 00:13:31,479 So I'm-- I think I could just slip into that. 297 00:13:31,479 --> 00:13:33,189 I can't let you join that one, 298 00:13:33,189 --> 00:13:35,525 but I-- I can get you into, uh, 299 00:13:35,525 --> 00:13:38,570 "Kooks, Crazies, and Nut Jobs: Writing About Mental Illness" 300 00:13:38,570 --> 00:13:40,071 with Jan Barnes-Jablonski. 301 00:13:40,071 --> 00:13:42,616 I don't think any of those words are okay to say. 302 00:13:42,616 --> 00:13:44,492 It's literally the name of the workshop. 303 00:13:44,492 --> 00:13:45,368 AMY: Clare. Clare. 304 00:13:45,368 --> 00:13:46,536 CLARE: Oh. 305 00:13:51,291 --> 00:13:53,209 AMY: Uh-huh, okay. Can you hold on one second? 306 00:13:53,209 --> 00:13:54,211 Amy! [scoffs] 307 00:13:54,211 --> 00:13:56,004 Oh, my God, I'm dealing with this book stuff. 308 00:13:56,004 --> 00:13:58,006 My agent wants this book to come out in-- 309 00:13:58,006 --> 00:13:59,674 Why did you just leave me? 310 00:14:01,218 --> 00:14:03,094 - Are you being serious right now? - Yeah! 311 00:14:03,094 --> 00:14:06,765 I didn't leave you, Clare. You stayed. 312 00:14:08,058 --> 00:14:09,059 CLARE: Ugh. 313 00:14:10,393 --> 00:14:11,686 Hi. Yeah, I'm here. 314 00:14:13,104 --> 00:14:15,565 I-- I don't know, I've never been to London before. 315 00:14:19,110 --> 00:14:20,111 Wow. 316 00:14:20,946 --> 00:14:22,697 This-- This is incredible. 317 00:14:22,697 --> 00:14:25,533 Yeah, well, don't expect a home library. 318 00:14:26,451 --> 00:14:27,452 Hi! 319 00:14:27,452 --> 00:14:29,079 Hi, Mom. JESS: Hi! 320 00:14:29,079 --> 00:14:30,580 - We meet again! - Whoa! 321 00:14:30,580 --> 00:14:33,041 CLARE: Jess didn't believe me when I said, "Middle of nowhere." 322 00:14:33,541 --> 00:14:34,876 - Hi, honey. - I missed you. 323 00:14:34,876 --> 00:14:36,253 How was the drive? 324 00:14:37,754 --> 00:14:39,256 I hope no one rear-ended you. 325 00:14:39,256 --> 00:14:40,966 [laughing] No. No. 326 00:14:40,966 --> 00:14:41,967 FRANKIE: This time. 327 00:14:46,471 --> 00:14:47,472 Is this-- 328 00:14:48,557 --> 00:14:49,933 Is this, um... 329 00:14:49,933 --> 00:14:51,184 Yeah. 330 00:14:51,685 --> 00:14:54,938 Yeah. Yeah, we-- we wanted it to be a-- a surprise. 331 00:14:54,938 --> 00:14:56,898 It's Jess' grandma's engagement ring. 332 00:14:57,732 --> 00:14:59,192 I am surprised. 333 00:15:01,611 --> 00:15:03,822 DANNY: [on voice mail] Hey, it's Danny. You know what to do. 334 00:15:03,822 --> 00:15:05,448 Hey, it's me. I'm just checking in 335 00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:08,034 because I-- I just hate how we left things, and I just-- 336 00:15:08,618 --> 00:15:10,370 This place is so awful. 337 00:15:11,413 --> 00:15:14,833 People are so weird, and-- and everyone is vegan, 338 00:15:14,833 --> 00:15:16,042 and there's, like, no bar, 339 00:15:16,042 --> 00:15:18,336 and I just-- I'm, like-- Just wanna-- 340 00:15:22,799 --> 00:15:26,052 Uh, anyway, so I'll just see you tomorrow night. 341 00:15:26,052 --> 00:15:28,430 And, um, uh-- Okay. All right. Bye. 342 00:15:44,821 --> 00:15:45,822 Ooh, my God! 343 00:15:47,282 --> 00:15:49,409 - You all right? - Yeah, it's hotter than I-- 344 00:15:49,409 --> 00:15:50,493 Ooh! 345 00:15:50,493 --> 00:15:51,870 - HAYES: You'll get used to it. - Yeah. 346 00:15:56,249 --> 00:15:57,250 I'm Clare. 347 00:15:58,460 --> 00:16:00,003 P-- Pierce. 348 00:16:00,003 --> 00:16:01,004 Oh, yeah? 349 00:16:01,755 --> 00:16:03,590 CLARE: You probably don't remember my name. 350 00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:09,888 Oh, look, if I-- If I did anything, uh, inappropriate, 351 00:16:09,888 --> 00:16:11,514 it was entirely my fault. 352 00:16:11,514 --> 00:16:13,975 I was a whiskey sodden wanker 353 00:16:13,975 --> 00:16:15,393 - with the manners of a fuckin'-- - Oh, my God. No! 354 00:16:15,393 --> 00:16:17,270 - No? - Yeah. No. 355 00:16:17,270 --> 00:16:18,813 All right, that's a fucking relief. 356 00:16:18,813 --> 00:16:23,193 Actually, I sent you a letter, uh, once 357 00:16:23,193 --> 00:16:25,695 - with a short story... - Oh, yeah? 358 00:16:25,695 --> 00:16:26,696 ...that I'd written. 359 00:16:26,696 --> 00:16:29,783 It's called "The House with the Blue Canoe." 360 00:16:30,283 --> 00:16:32,244 Right. CLARE: It was a long time ago. 361 00:16:32,244 --> 00:16:34,329 It was, like, 18 years ago that I wrote it. 362 00:16:34,329 --> 00:16:36,081 It was on the back of a menu. 363 00:16:36,081 --> 00:16:38,416 I was a waitress. Had a lot of doodles on it. 364 00:16:38,416 --> 00:16:39,417 Nice. 365 00:16:39,417 --> 00:16:42,379 The menu had a lot of stuff on it, like, "Surf, Surf, and Surf." 366 00:16:42,379 --> 00:16:43,380 HAYES: [chuckling] Okay. 367 00:16:43,380 --> 00:16:45,882 He was a very irreverent chef. HAYES: Right. 368 00:16:45,882 --> 00:16:49,553 Um, anyway, the-- the point is, is that I wrote to you about my story 369 00:16:49,553 --> 00:16:50,971 and then you answered me back. 370 00:16:52,472 --> 00:16:53,473 What did I say? 371 00:16:54,057 --> 00:16:58,478 "Dear Clare, thank you so much for sharing your beautiful short story. 372 00:16:58,478 --> 00:17:00,438 "I was deep in the throes of writing, 373 00:17:00,438 --> 00:17:03,817 "but I just had to stop to tell you to keep up the good work and keep going. 374 00:17:03,817 --> 00:17:07,237 There's something special there. Much love, H.M." 375 00:17:07,237 --> 00:17:09,030 [exhales] Or something like that. 376 00:17:09,030 --> 00:17:10,907 Yeah. That's nice. 377 00:17:11,741 --> 00:17:12,742 Anyway... 378 00:17:15,537 --> 00:17:20,542 You told me to-- You... told me to keep going. 379 00:17:20,542 --> 00:17:22,419 - HAYES: Good. - So I did. 380 00:17:22,419 --> 00:17:23,879 - Okay, good! - Yeah. 381 00:17:23,879 --> 00:17:26,006 Then... I didn't. 382 00:17:27,173 --> 00:17:28,216 I didn't. I-- 383 00:17:29,885 --> 00:17:31,678 Oh, I thought that if I just, like, saw you, 384 00:17:31,678 --> 00:17:34,180 like... saw you, saw you-- 385 00:17:34,180 --> 00:17:37,809 Like, it-- it would just jar something loose in me 386 00:17:37,809 --> 00:17:42,022 or just, like, dislodge something that's, like, kept me from-- 387 00:17:43,690 --> 00:17:46,359 [sighs] Do you remember what you saw in me? 388 00:17:49,112 --> 00:17:50,322 I didn't read your story. 389 00:17:52,073 --> 00:17:54,743 And I-- I didn't write to you, for that matter. 390 00:17:54,743 --> 00:17:55,744 You did. 391 00:17:55,744 --> 00:17:57,704 I have, like-- I have it right up there. You definitely did. 392 00:17:57,704 --> 00:18:00,457 No, no, no, no, no. That wasn't me. That would've been Morag. 393 00:18:00,457 --> 00:18:02,626 Is-- Morag is a person? 394 00:18:02,626 --> 00:18:04,669 Morag. Yes. That was my first wife. 395 00:18:04,669 --> 00:18:07,714 She used to answer all my fan mail, you know? 396 00:18:07,714 --> 00:18:09,591 And, um, she was a poet. 397 00:18:09,591 --> 00:18:13,678 She definitely-- She would've used the word "throes." 398 00:18:13,678 --> 00:18:15,889 I mean, she had a tendency towards the dramatic, 399 00:18:15,889 --> 00:18:17,474 which was unfortunate. 400 00:18:17,474 --> 00:18:20,477 But she had really good taste in other people's work. 401 00:18:21,144 --> 00:18:24,272 And she loved fish. Shellfish. 402 00:18:25,482 --> 00:18:29,444 So "Surf, Surf, and Surf" would've been right up her alley. 403 00:18:30,028 --> 00:18:32,447 [inhales] Well, okay. 404 00:18:34,741 --> 00:18:36,409 Jess, please sit. 405 00:18:36,409 --> 00:18:37,994 Oh, no, it's okay. 406 00:18:37,994 --> 00:18:39,621 I actually... 407 00:18:40,997 --> 00:18:43,625 I need to use the, uh, outhouse. 408 00:18:43,625 --> 00:18:46,503 Then I will tackle the dishes. You stay right there. 409 00:18:47,754 --> 00:18:48,588 [door closes] 410 00:18:48,588 --> 00:18:51,091 He's a really good guy, Mom. 411 00:18:51,091 --> 00:18:52,592 FRANKIE: He seems wonderful. 412 00:18:53,510 --> 00:18:55,595 And he obviously adores you. 413 00:18:55,595 --> 00:18:58,390 But you are both just so young. 414 00:18:58,390 --> 00:19:01,017 I just don't want you to make the same mistakes I did. 415 00:19:01,518 --> 00:19:02,519 CLARE: Okay, well... 416 00:19:05,063 --> 00:19:07,190 Jess isn't Dad, and I'm not you. 417 00:19:10,151 --> 00:19:13,863 I don't wanna live like this forever. 418 00:19:14,614 --> 00:19:20,036 There's a whole world out there of art and... culture 419 00:19:20,036 --> 00:19:22,455 and-- and rooms full of books. 420 00:19:22,455 --> 00:19:23,582 And I want that. 421 00:19:24,082 --> 00:19:26,793 You should have whatever you want. 422 00:19:28,378 --> 00:19:29,796 Okay. Well, I want more than this. 423 00:19:36,011 --> 00:19:37,012 [door opens] 424 00:19:37,012 --> 00:19:39,431 Whoo! Hello! 425 00:19:40,307 --> 00:19:45,103 So, there's, like, a fire-pit jamboree or something tonight, if you wanna-- 426 00:19:45,103 --> 00:19:46,605 What are you doing? 427 00:19:46,605 --> 00:19:47,981 I-- I think I'm gonna head out. 428 00:19:48,940 --> 00:19:49,941 [Amy sighs] 429 00:19:52,569 --> 00:19:54,070 I'm sorry if this... 430 00:19:55,655 --> 00:19:57,449 feels hard for you. 431 00:19:57,449 --> 00:20:00,118 Who said anything about anything being hard? 432 00:20:00,118 --> 00:20:02,370 Why can't you even pretend to be happy for me? 433 00:20:02,954 --> 00:20:05,707 What? Amy, I am so happy for you. 434 00:20:05,707 --> 00:20:08,877 Okay. You're happy for me? CLARE: I am. 435 00:20:08,877 --> 00:20:10,712 I mean, you got a book deal 20 years ago, 436 00:20:10,712 --> 00:20:13,548 and I've been busting my ass trying to catch up ever since. 437 00:20:13,548 --> 00:20:14,549 16 years ago. 438 00:20:15,634 --> 00:20:16,843 And then I had Rae. 439 00:20:17,344 --> 00:20:18,345 Okay, so... 440 00:20:19,471 --> 00:20:21,806 you-- you got the thing that you chose to do, 441 00:20:21,806 --> 00:20:23,767 but yet, you're not really that happy for me 442 00:20:23,767 --> 00:20:26,311 when I get the thing that I chose to do. 443 00:20:26,311 --> 00:20:28,021 That's not fair. AMY: It's not? 444 00:20:28,021 --> 00:20:31,274 I've been with you, side by side, neck and neck, 445 00:20:31,274 --> 00:20:35,362 for every single little and big event in your entire life. 446 00:20:35,362 --> 00:20:37,864 I've been there for your wedding to Danny, 447 00:20:37,864 --> 00:20:39,699 all the kid's birthday parties, 448 00:20:39,699 --> 00:20:42,327 the snot noses, the discolored shits. 449 00:20:42,327 --> 00:20:45,914 Your joys were my joys. Your bummers were my bummers. 450 00:20:45,914 --> 00:20:49,751 And you can't even, I don't know, be happy for me! 451 00:20:49,751 --> 00:20:51,628 Because I was happy for you 452 00:20:51,628 --> 00:20:55,382 when you got all the things that you wanted that I didn't get. 453 00:20:55,382 --> 00:20:57,926 That's different. That's, like-- You didn't want those things! 454 00:20:57,926 --> 00:20:59,970 AMY: How do you know what I want? 455 00:20:59,970 --> 00:21:01,137 It's, like, you just-- 456 00:21:02,973 --> 00:21:04,432 I'm sorry, but you just act like 457 00:21:04,432 --> 00:21:06,560 you're the only fucking person in the entire world 458 00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:08,436 that didn't get your heart's desire. 459 00:21:08,812 --> 00:21:09,813 You didn't write a book. 460 00:21:10,772 --> 00:21:12,983 You didn't... write... the book. 461 00:21:13,525 --> 00:21:14,985 You didn't become the writer 462 00:21:14,985 --> 00:21:17,571 that you imagined that you were going to become. 463 00:21:17,571 --> 00:21:19,864 And it's not my fault! 464 00:21:19,864 --> 00:21:21,491 And it's not Danny's fault. 465 00:21:21,491 --> 00:21:23,952 And it's definitely not Rae's fault. 466 00:21:29,749 --> 00:21:31,918 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That was-- 467 00:21:33,879 --> 00:21:34,880 Clare. 468 00:21:36,298 --> 00:21:37,299 [door slams shut] 469 00:21:42,012 --> 00:21:44,347 ♪ somber music playing ♪ 470 00:22:09,205 --> 00:22:12,000 FRANKIE: I can take this up for you after the wedding. 471 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,169 It'll make a lovely summer dress. 472 00:22:16,796 --> 00:22:17,797 Thanks, Mom. 473 00:22:20,217 --> 00:22:21,843 What is it, sweet pea? 474 00:22:22,260 --> 00:22:23,261 Too tight? 475 00:22:28,016 --> 00:22:29,601 Do you think I'm making a mistake? 476 00:22:32,646 --> 00:22:34,522 This is not a runaway train. 477 00:22:35,232 --> 00:22:37,025 And if you don't want to do this, 478 00:22:38,151 --> 00:22:40,028 you can step off at any time. 479 00:22:42,864 --> 00:22:44,449 No. I love him. 480 00:22:44,449 --> 00:22:45,450 And everyone's here. 481 00:22:47,786 --> 00:22:49,746 That is not why you get married. 482 00:22:53,750 --> 00:22:56,044 I'm sorry I acted like this wasn't good enough. 483 00:22:59,506 --> 00:23:00,507 That's okay. 484 00:23:07,889 --> 00:23:09,015 CLARE: Hey. AMY: Mm. 485 00:23:13,061 --> 00:23:15,021 I didn't know you wanted to have kids. 486 00:23:16,022 --> 00:23:17,023 I said... 487 00:23:18,858 --> 00:23:20,694 that I wasn't having kids. 488 00:23:23,572 --> 00:23:24,573 Amy... 489 00:23:26,366 --> 00:23:27,993 I'm just-- [exhales] 490 00:23:27,993 --> 00:23:30,829 I'm just really tired of people looking at me 491 00:23:30,829 --> 00:23:33,456 like I'm some un-- unrealized woman 492 00:23:33,456 --> 00:23:36,751 because I'm-- I'm not a mother. 493 00:23:38,044 --> 00:23:39,421 And then sometimes... 494 00:23:40,505 --> 00:23:42,382 [exhales] ...I think that they're right. 495 00:23:44,926 --> 00:23:45,927 Amy. 496 00:23:48,305 --> 00:23:50,265 You are an amazing woman. 497 00:23:50,265 --> 00:23:51,933 You're fearless. 498 00:23:51,933 --> 00:23:52,976 You're gorgeous. 499 00:23:52,976 --> 00:23:55,061 You're funny as shit. 500 00:23:55,061 --> 00:23:58,607 You once worked a double with a plum up your vagina. 501 00:23:59,441 --> 00:24:00,817 Who else can say that? 502 00:24:00,817 --> 00:24:03,778 Oh, my God. I hope nobody. [Clare chuckles] 503 00:24:06,656 --> 00:24:10,076 You are the best friend that anyone could ever have. 504 00:24:11,077 --> 00:24:13,455 And you are a soon-to-be... 505 00:24:14,414 --> 00:24:16,625 bestselling novelist. 506 00:24:17,834 --> 00:24:18,835 I know that. 507 00:24:21,087 --> 00:24:22,088 Thank you. 508 00:24:27,177 --> 00:24:28,637 Can I come here, please? AMY: Yes. 509 00:24:36,561 --> 00:24:37,562 Mm. 510 00:24:37,979 --> 00:24:39,856 Hayes didn't even write me that letter. 511 00:24:39,856 --> 00:24:41,608 What? What're you talking about? 512 00:24:41,608 --> 00:24:43,443 It turns out it was his wife. 513 00:24:43,443 --> 00:24:45,487 - One of his wives. - Oh, my God. 514 00:24:45,487 --> 00:24:47,364 - Named Morag. - Morag? 515 00:24:47,364 --> 00:24:48,573 Morag. 516 00:24:49,282 --> 00:24:53,328 And she was the one who answered all of his fan mail. 517 00:24:53,328 --> 00:24:54,329 Barf. 518 00:24:55,872 --> 00:24:57,082 Let me tell you something. 519 00:24:58,333 --> 00:24:59,918 I bet you 520 00:24:59,918 --> 00:25:03,505 that Hayes MacKeown would... 521 00:25:04,506 --> 00:25:07,926 kill to be turning 50 right now, 522 00:25:07,926 --> 00:25:09,678 his whole life ahead of him. 523 00:25:16,810 --> 00:25:17,811 There you go. 524 00:25:20,855 --> 00:25:23,483 CLARE: Hi. It's me again. 525 00:25:23,483 --> 00:25:25,110 Blue Canoe, right? 526 00:25:25,110 --> 00:25:26,987 I'm gonna make you actually sign my letter. 527 00:25:29,614 --> 00:25:31,658 Is this my Morag penitence? 528 00:25:31,658 --> 00:25:33,368 Maybe. HAYES: Okay. 529 00:25:33,868 --> 00:25:36,913 See the handwriting runs right off the fucking page. Look at that. 530 00:25:36,913 --> 00:25:37,914 CLARE: I know. 531 00:25:40,250 --> 00:25:41,376 Whatever happened to her? 532 00:25:41,793 --> 00:25:43,837 - Oh, she left. - Ah, right. 533 00:25:43,837 --> 00:25:45,463 - HAYES: I mean, they all fucking left. - Mm. 534 00:25:47,215 --> 00:25:50,844 MAN: Dear Sugar. It's-- It's like this online advice column. 535 00:25:50,844 --> 00:25:54,931 But she writes these raw, gorgeous essays that just gut you. 536 00:25:54,931 --> 00:25:56,850 WOMAN: Oh, I don't do self-help. 537 00:25:56,850 --> 00:26:00,937 It's not even like that, okay? It's-- It's-- She's been through it. 538 00:26:00,937 --> 00:26:03,523 She's been through it, and she's real about it and you can tell. 539 00:26:03,523 --> 00:26:05,317 MAN: She would-- She would-- HAYES: Oi! 540 00:26:05,317 --> 00:26:08,445 WOMAN: Okay, you've convinced me... 541 00:26:08,445 --> 00:26:10,030 You know what? HAYES: Hmm? 542 00:26:10,947 --> 00:26:12,240 Why don't you keep it? 543 00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:13,241 - HAYES: Really? - Yeah. 544 00:26:13,241 --> 00:26:14,534 - HAYES: You sure about that? - I'm good. 545 00:26:15,785 --> 00:26:17,037 That's nice of you. 546 00:26:18,830 --> 00:26:20,332 I would like this though. 547 00:26:20,332 --> 00:26:21,958 Please. Sign. 548 00:26:21,958 --> 00:26:22,959 All right. 549 00:26:23,710 --> 00:26:25,337 Should I personalize it? 550 00:26:25,337 --> 00:26:27,214 Should I use the word "throes"? 551 00:26:28,715 --> 00:26:29,966 Uh, "Sugar." 552 00:26:29,966 --> 00:26:31,718 You can make it out to... 553 00:26:34,095 --> 00:26:35,096 "Sugar." 554 00:26:37,224 --> 00:26:38,391 All right. 555 00:26:42,437 --> 00:26:43,438 CLARE: Dear women, 556 00:26:45,398 --> 00:26:47,234 I'm writing to all of you out there 557 00:26:47,234 --> 00:26:52,072 who are in the throes of trying to answer these impossible questions. 558 00:26:52,822 --> 00:26:53,823 When should I go? 559 00:26:55,242 --> 00:26:56,701 When do I leave? 560 00:26:57,911 --> 00:26:59,162 And how do I stay? 561 00:27:01,414 --> 00:27:05,001 Right before my junior year of college, I married a good man 562 00:27:05,001 --> 00:27:09,422 whom I both loved and should not have married. 563 00:27:11,007 --> 00:27:13,051 Because the day I married him, 564 00:27:13,718 --> 00:27:18,640 there was a small, clear voice inside me that said, "Go." 565 00:27:19,683 --> 00:27:20,684 That said... 566 00:27:21,685 --> 00:27:22,686 "Go... 567 00:27:23,645 --> 00:27:24,854 "even though you love him. 568 00:27:25,772 --> 00:27:26,940 "Go... 569 00:27:27,774 --> 00:27:30,819 "even though he is kind and faithful and good to you. 570 00:27:31,695 --> 00:27:32,904 "Go... 571 00:27:32,904 --> 00:27:35,115 "even though there is nowhere to go. 572 00:27:36,032 --> 00:27:37,033 "Go... 573 00:27:38,076 --> 00:27:41,413 even though you don't know exactly why you can't stay." 574 00:27:42,622 --> 00:27:44,332 And once I heard that voice, 575 00:27:44,332 --> 00:27:46,126 I couldn't unhear it. 576 00:27:47,168 --> 00:27:50,046 So instead, I tried not to listen. 577 00:27:50,881 --> 00:27:54,593 Oh, but, women, you have to listen. 578 00:27:55,927 --> 00:27:58,263 There are so many reasons we should stay. 579 00:28:00,557 --> 00:28:04,102 But there is really only one reason to go. 580 00:28:04,102 --> 00:28:05,645 AMY: Should we hit the outlets on the way home? 581 00:28:06,104 --> 00:28:07,147 CLARE: Ooh. Yeah. 582 00:28:09,482 --> 00:28:10,483 Go... 583 00:28:11,276 --> 00:28:12,569 because you want to. 584 00:28:14,446 --> 00:28:15,447 Go... 585 00:28:15,447 --> 00:28:18,575 because wanting to leave is enough. 586 00:28:20,243 --> 00:28:22,829 Yours, Sugar. 587 00:28:30,503 --> 00:28:31,588 Hey. 588 00:28:32,172 --> 00:28:33,548 Hi. I'm so glad you're up. 589 00:28:34,049 --> 00:28:35,258 DANNY: Yeah. 590 00:28:35,258 --> 00:28:36,760 How-- How was it? 591 00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:39,137 Oh, uh, it was, like, awful. 592 00:28:39,137 --> 00:28:41,973 And then, it was... actually good. 593 00:28:45,977 --> 00:28:47,395 I, uh, I... 594 00:28:48,813 --> 00:28:49,814 I'm sorry. 595 00:28:52,192 --> 00:28:53,193 For what? 596 00:28:55,695 --> 00:28:56,696 I've, um... 597 00:28:58,990 --> 00:29:00,158 I have been trying to... 598 00:29:01,534 --> 00:29:02,911 get out of this hole. 599 00:29:03,870 --> 00:29:04,871 Um... 600 00:29:07,999 --> 00:29:13,797 And I've been blaming you and... Rae too, honestly. 601 00:29:14,798 --> 00:29:17,425 Neither of you have kept me down in it. 602 00:29:17,425 --> 00:29:19,803 Clare, I-- CLARE: No, no, um... 603 00:29:19,803 --> 00:29:22,264 You were right. I did betray your trust. 604 00:29:22,264 --> 00:29:25,392 It has nothing to do with Lucas or the money. 605 00:29:27,018 --> 00:29:28,728 It's about our life together. 606 00:29:30,313 --> 00:29:31,314 I, uh... 607 00:29:32,691 --> 00:29:33,692 I disappeared. 608 00:29:35,735 --> 00:29:37,529 I emotionally bailed 609 00:29:38,405 --> 00:29:39,781 on so many levels 610 00:29:40,490 --> 00:29:42,659 and I just, like, haven't felt alive. 611 00:29:44,869 --> 00:29:46,580 - You know? - Yeah. Yeah. 612 00:29:47,831 --> 00:29:50,417 And so I have been working on something. 613 00:29:50,417 --> 00:29:52,919 Something I haven't told you about. 614 00:29:52,919 --> 00:29:54,129 And I think it's really good. 615 00:29:54,129 --> 00:29:56,339 And I-- I think people think it's really good. 616 00:29:56,339 --> 00:29:58,049 And I'm gonna do it. 617 00:29:58,049 --> 00:30:00,468 I'm gonna work on it. Full time. 618 00:30:00,468 --> 00:30:04,139 So don't be mad, but I-- I wanna quit my job, okay? 619 00:30:04,139 --> 00:30:06,141 And I-- I-- I know I just took it on, 620 00:30:06,141 --> 00:30:07,726 but I think that that's what has to happen. 621 00:30:07,726 --> 00:30:08,602 Yeah. 622 00:30:09,185 --> 00:30:12,314 And I also spent 200 bucks at the outlets, and that's it. 623 00:30:15,025 --> 00:30:16,651 Okay. CLARE: Okay? 624 00:30:17,569 --> 00:30:19,696 Oh, thank you. Thank you, Danny. 625 00:30:21,865 --> 00:30:24,284 What? We're gonna figure this out. 626 00:30:24,284 --> 00:30:26,411 - I-- I'm, uh-- - Just you, me, and Rae. 627 00:30:26,411 --> 00:30:28,622 - Gimme a se-- Let me talk. - Okay. No. Okay. 628 00:30:29,122 --> 00:30:30,123 I am... 629 00:30:31,124 --> 00:30:32,959 so happy for you. I really am. 630 00:30:32,959 --> 00:30:35,378 But, um, I don't wanna do this anymore. 631 00:30:37,005 --> 00:30:38,006 Do what? 632 00:30:38,590 --> 00:30:40,175 This. Us. 633 00:30:40,175 --> 00:30:41,927 - CLARE: You don't wanna do us? - I wanna go. 634 00:30:43,011 --> 00:30:44,262 What are you talking about? 635 00:30:45,013 --> 00:30:46,806 I wanna go because I want to. 636 00:30:47,891 --> 00:30:48,892 And... 637 00:30:50,685 --> 00:30:53,021 And wanting to leave, it's-- it's enough. 638 00:30:53,813 --> 00:30:56,816 ♪ 639 00:31:00,111 --> 00:31:02,530 ♪ I fell in love with you ♪ 640 00:31:02,530 --> 00:31:05,116 ♪ Long before I knew ♪ 641 00:31:05,116 --> 00:31:10,163 ♪ What it meant to give everything up ♪ 642 00:31:10,163 --> 00:31:12,582 ♪ I was a rolling stone ♪ 643 00:31:12,582 --> 00:31:15,043 ♪ Rolling my way alone ♪ 644 00:31:15,043 --> 00:31:19,881 ♪ Till you came and made sense out of everything ♪ 645 00:31:20,465 --> 00:31:23,385 ♪ If it was all a mistake ♪ 646 00:31:25,720 --> 00:31:28,682 ♪ Then I guess we're both to blame ♪ 647 00:31:30,225 --> 00:31:31,935 ♪ I could've been ♪ 648 00:31:32,519 --> 00:31:34,646 ♪ So many things ♪ 649 00:31:34,646 --> 00:31:38,858 ♪ But it would never be enough for you ♪ 650 00:31:39,693 --> 00:31:41,236 ♪ I was the one ♪ 651 00:31:41,945 --> 00:31:43,989 ♪ You counted on ♪ 652 00:31:43,989 --> 00:31:48,577 ♪ But I was never the one for you ♪ 653 00:31:49,703 --> 00:31:51,162 ♪ Now I know ♪ 654 00:31:52,455 --> 00:31:56,501 ♪ I lost you a long time ago ♪