1
00:00:02,078 --> 00:00:07,083
(birds chirping, fire crackling)

2
00:00:09,552 --> 00:00:18,561
               ♪                

3
00:00:20,430 --> 00:00:23,266
      Beautiful day today.      

4
00:00:23,299 --> 00:00:24,467
          Yes, it is.           

5
00:00:24,534 --> 00:00:26,035
           (grunting)           

6
00:00:29,906 --> 00:00:31,040
         Look at that.          

7
00:00:31,074 --> 00:00:33,776
         I really like          
   the look of your pemmican.   

8
00:00:33,810 --> 00:00:35,445
       You can have some.       

9
00:00:36,779 --> 00:00:38,314
           (grunting)           

10
00:00:42,452 --> 00:00:43,453
             Yeah.              

11
00:00:44,554 --> 00:00:46,155
     It's a real nice day.      

12
00:00:48,391 --> 00:00:49,892
   What's that you got there?   

13
00:00:49,926 --> 00:00:50,927
       Is that a satchel?       

14
00:00:52,128 --> 00:00:53,629
    You know it's a satchel.    

15
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:56,933
       It's really nice.        

16
00:00:56,966 --> 00:00:58,801
    My grandparents made it.    

17
00:00:58,835 --> 00:01:01,337
        Lot of lineage.         

18
00:01:01,404 --> 00:01:04,240
          That's where          
     I keep my blueberries.     

19
00:01:04,273 --> 00:01:06,576
I don't think you're getting it.

20
00:01:06,609 --> 00:01:10,146
    I really really like...     

21
00:01:11,180 --> 00:01:12,415
        ...your satchel.        

22
00:01:12,448 --> 00:01:14,250
     Yeah, it's a nice bag.     

23
00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:17,153
       Listen, I'm going        
        to hit the road.        

24
00:01:17,186 --> 00:01:19,288
           (grunting)           

25
00:01:19,322 --> 00:01:21,457
 It's a real beautiful satchel. 

26
00:01:23,259 --> 00:01:26,329
  Okay, you love the satchel.   

27
00:01:26,362 --> 00:01:29,465
     I get it. I will keep      
    your compliment with me     

28
00:01:29,499 --> 00:01:32,502
    and it will keep me warm    
    in my journey. Goodbye.     

29
00:01:41,043 --> 00:01:42,111
        I forgot to say,        

30
00:01:42,145 --> 00:01:44,480
  I love that jacket of yours.  

31
00:01:44,514 --> 00:01:54,524
               ♪                

32
00:02:00,029 --> 00:02:03,332
         How do I look?         
  Goes good with the satchel.   

33
00:02:03,366 --> 00:02:05,868
        (birds chirping)        

34
00:02:05,902 --> 00:02:08,738
♪ 'Cause I can love you, baby ♪ 

35
00:02:08,804 --> 00:02:10,706
       ♪ All night long ♪       

36
00:02:11,707 --> 00:02:17,847
               ♪                

37
00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:19,649
             Roger:             
   That was Cryin' On My Moon   

38
00:02:19,682 --> 00:02:22,919
by Sad Sonyah and the Crybabies,

39
00:02:22,985 --> 00:02:25,755
and in case you forgot who I am,

40
00:02:25,821 --> 00:02:28,090
            this is             
  Laughingstick in the Morning  

41
00:02:28,157 --> 00:02:30,226
       starting a little        
       later than usual.        

42
00:02:31,427 --> 00:02:33,863
      (slurping, sighing)       

43
00:02:33,896 --> 00:02:36,666
     Went and seen a moose      
out in the bush that died funny 

44
00:02:36,699 --> 00:02:41,437
          and ho'ley,           
    it was dead and deadly.     

45
00:02:41,504 --> 00:02:42,838
  If you wanna talk about it,   

46
00:02:42,872 --> 00:02:44,173
       - lines are open!        
       - (phone ringing)        

47
00:02:44,207 --> 00:02:46,576
  Go ahead, you're on the air   
      with Laughingstick.       

48
00:02:46,609 --> 00:02:48,277
        Rita: It's Rita.        

49
00:02:48,344 --> 00:02:49,879
  Rita, did you see the moose?  

50
00:02:49,912 --> 00:02:52,114
     Rita: Nah, I just need     
      a ride to the store.      

51
00:02:52,181 --> 00:02:53,115
           For what?            

52
00:02:53,182 --> 00:02:54,417
     Rita: I'm out of eggs!     

53
00:02:54,450 --> 00:02:56,219
  Alright, Rita's out of eggs.  

54
00:02:56,252 --> 00:02:59,355
 If you're out there listening, 
maybe swing by and pick her up. 

55
00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:05,228
               ♪                

56
00:03:05,261 --> 00:03:06,395
    Oh, hey! You're in luck!    

57
00:03:06,429 --> 00:03:07,530
             I am?              

58
00:03:07,563 --> 00:03:09,232
          Yeah, we got          
   a promotion on right now.    

59
00:03:09,265 --> 00:03:12,268
Anyone who gets a bag of coffee 
 gets a free box of chocolates. 

60
00:03:12,301 --> 00:03:13,970
           Oh, okay.            

61
00:03:14,036 --> 00:03:17,406
It's not just for people I like,
       it's for anybody.        

62
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:19,275
         What are you,          
  trying to give me diabetes?   

63
00:03:19,308 --> 00:03:21,711
        Uh... Oh, um...         

64
00:03:21,744 --> 00:03:22,979
      Maybe for Chickadee?      

65
00:03:23,045 --> 00:03:24,247
 You want her to have diabetes? 

66
00:03:24,280 --> 00:03:26,582
         You know what?         
     It's a dumb promotion.     

67
00:03:26,616 --> 00:03:30,386
      We're gonna stop it.      
      We're gonna stop it!      

68
00:03:30,419 --> 00:03:32,989
    Somebody heard me. So...    

69
00:03:33,055 --> 00:03:35,057
           Oh. Okay.            

70
00:03:35,091 --> 00:03:36,125
        See you, Brady.         

71
00:03:38,461 --> 00:03:39,829
      Oh, yeah, you will?       

72
00:03:39,895 --> 00:03:44,166
   (romantic music swelling)    

73
00:03:44,233 --> 00:03:47,069
          Woman on TV:          
   I prayed for your return.    

74
00:03:47,103 --> 00:03:50,406
A'ho, I have returned, as has my
loyal horse companion, Comanche.

75
00:03:50,439 --> 00:03:53,009
        Yes, of course.         
      Hi there, Comanche.       

76
00:03:54,010 --> 00:03:56,245
Is it true you came back for me?

77
00:03:56,279 --> 00:03:57,280
          It is true.           

78
00:03:57,313 --> 00:04:00,016
      You are as beautiful      
         as I remember.         

79
00:04:00,082 --> 00:04:02,151
I will take you up Hunter's Peak
      to watch the sunset.      

80
00:04:02,184 --> 00:04:04,520
Forget the sunset. Take me now. 

81
00:04:04,587 --> 00:04:06,756
No. I must first earn your love 

82
00:04:06,789 --> 00:04:09,992
         over time with         
   several romantic gestures.   

83
00:04:10,026 --> 00:04:12,128
      - (booming outside)       
     - Woman: Oh, Tatanka!      

84
00:04:12,161 --> 00:04:13,129
           (booming)            

85
00:04:13,162 --> 00:04:15,431
  Man: Move you fuckin' thing!  

86
00:04:15,464 --> 00:04:19,435
  Fucking come on! I'm stuck!   
           (grunting)           

87
00:04:19,468 --> 00:04:22,171
            Come on!            

88
00:04:22,204 --> 00:04:23,839
          - (ripping)           
            - Shit!             

89
00:04:25,274 --> 00:04:26,842
        What the fuck!?         

90
00:04:26,876 --> 00:04:29,679
           (grunting)           

91
00:04:29,712 --> 00:04:32,348
           (panting)            

92
00:04:41,157 --> 00:04:42,124
     Do you have duct tape?     

93
00:04:42,158 --> 00:04:44,694
       Look at this shit.       
        It's all fucked.        

94
00:04:44,727 --> 00:04:46,228
          And I think           
    I swallowed a bug, too.     

95
00:04:46,295 --> 00:04:47,663
         Good for you.          

96
00:04:47,697 --> 00:04:51,133
Ho'leh don't even be like that. 

97
00:04:52,401 --> 00:04:53,969
       What do you want?        

98
00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:56,305
 I heard you and Stephen Harper 
got nothing going on right now. 

99
00:04:56,339 --> 00:04:57,473
     None of your business.     

100
00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:59,975
       Cool, cool, cool,        
     'cause I was thinking      

101
00:05:00,009 --> 00:05:02,745
     maybe you can come by,     
     we can hang out later?     

102
00:05:02,812 --> 00:05:04,213
           Come over?           

103
00:05:04,246 --> 00:05:06,148
       Yeah, I'll cook up       
   some macaroni and cheese,    

104
00:05:06,182 --> 00:05:07,416
   I'll cut up some wieners,    

105
00:05:07,483 --> 00:05:09,085
  we'll watch Hell's Kitchen.   

106
00:05:09,151 --> 00:05:10,886
   I know you love that shit.   

107
00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:12,555
      You want me to just       
   come to your Mom's place?    

108
00:05:12,588 --> 00:05:14,924
         It's my house,         
     my mom's my neighbour.     

109
00:05:14,990 --> 00:05:17,560
      Your place is built       
     right onto her place.      

110
00:05:17,593 --> 00:05:19,061
      I have my own door.       

111
00:05:19,095 --> 00:05:20,396
       Is this your idea        
      of fighting for me,       

112
00:05:20,429 --> 00:05:21,731
because this feels like nothing.

113
00:05:21,764 --> 00:05:23,265
     I said I was going to      
      cut up the wieners.       

114
00:05:23,332 --> 00:05:25,935
          Look at us,           
     we're already fighting     

115
00:05:26,001 --> 00:05:27,269
         and we're not          
      even back together.       

116
00:05:27,336 --> 00:05:30,039
  No, no, no, no, no, no, no.   
      We're not fighting.       

117
00:05:30,072 --> 00:05:31,407
       When I was talking       
     about picking you up,      

118
00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:33,175
  that's just the start of it,  
    but we can skip all that    

119
00:05:33,209 --> 00:05:35,945
          and we can--          
  we can go to the big thing.   

120
00:05:36,011 --> 00:05:37,246
  Oh, you planned a big thing?  

121
00:05:37,279 --> 00:05:38,881
        You think I came        
      all this way just to      

122
00:05:38,914 --> 00:05:40,049
 rip my pants in front of you?  

123
00:05:40,082 --> 00:05:42,017
         I don't know.          

124
00:05:42,051 --> 00:05:43,919
       It's me, it's your       
little bannockburger, you know? 

125
00:05:43,953 --> 00:05:45,921
  I'll come by in the morning,  
       and, we'll, uh...        

126
00:05:45,955 --> 00:05:47,957
    we'll do the big thing.     

127
00:05:48,023 --> 00:05:50,593
   Okay. Cool. I'd like that.   

128
00:05:50,626 --> 00:05:53,929
   Just fuckin' missing her!    

129
00:05:53,963 --> 00:05:55,398
      Easy, bannock butt.       

130
00:05:55,431 --> 00:05:57,066
 You're just missing your arse. 

131
00:05:57,099 --> 00:05:58,234
           (groaning)           

132
00:05:58,267 --> 00:06:01,470
        Ho'ley heck boy,        
     go change them pants.      

133
00:06:01,537 --> 00:06:03,139
    I'm going to tell Mummy     
      you're talking shit!      

134
00:06:03,205 --> 00:06:04,907
     You know my brother's      
         an idiot, eh?          

135
00:06:04,940 --> 00:06:07,243
 Sometimes he's a sweet idiot.  

136
00:06:07,276 --> 00:06:08,577
      With taped up pants.      

137
00:06:08,611 --> 00:06:10,379
      He just ripped them.      

138
00:06:10,413 --> 00:06:13,616
       Oh, that makes it        
      so much better then.      

139
00:06:13,649 --> 00:06:17,653
   Don't even tell me you're    
 getting back with that weenuk. 

140
00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:19,422
     - I don't know. Maybe.     
      - (booming outside)       

141
00:06:19,455 --> 00:06:20,423
           We'll see.           

142
00:06:20,456 --> 00:06:21,891
           (booming)            

143
00:06:23,392 --> 00:06:25,394
             Paul:              
 Holy shit, this fucking thing! 

144
00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:26,629
       (engine rumbling)        

145
00:06:26,662 --> 00:06:28,931
      Sorry, I was saying,      

146
00:06:28,964 --> 00:06:30,065
 maybe we'll get back together. 

147
00:06:30,099 --> 00:06:31,133
       - (phone ringing)        
          - We'll see.          

148
00:06:31,167 --> 00:06:32,234
       No, no, I get it.        

149
00:06:32,268 --> 00:06:35,104
        You have a type,        
    and that type is busted.    

150
00:06:35,137 --> 00:06:36,305
  Like you don't have a type.   

151
00:06:36,338 --> 00:06:37,440
        (phone ringing)         

152
00:06:37,473 --> 00:06:39,942
       Ban' office. Busy.       

153
00:06:39,975 --> 00:06:43,145
   I don't even have a type.    

154
00:06:43,179 --> 00:06:46,148
      You like rugged guys      
     with shit for brains.      

155
00:06:46,182 --> 00:06:49,485
    ♪ Life a white buffalo ♪    

156
00:06:49,518 --> 00:06:52,822
       ♪ Standing strong        
     in the fading light ♪      

157
00:06:53,989 --> 00:06:56,926
 So? I used to like hot idiots. 

158
00:06:56,959 --> 00:06:59,962
       They always got me       
       with their bodies        

159
00:06:59,995 --> 00:07:01,997
       and the long hair        

160
00:07:02,031 --> 00:07:04,300
         and the bodies         

161
00:07:04,333 --> 00:07:05,634
         and the hair.          

162
00:07:05,668 --> 00:07:07,670
  Maybe we need something new.  

163
00:07:09,338 --> 00:07:11,273
     Where am I gonna find      
    someone new around here     

164
00:07:11,307 --> 00:07:13,309
     that isn't my cousin?      

165
00:07:13,342 --> 00:07:15,811
    They don't sell good men    
      at the North Store.       

166
00:07:15,845 --> 00:07:18,781
           (beeping)            

167
00:07:18,814 --> 00:07:21,550
     I know Jo can see me,      
    but how can I get her to    

168
00:07:21,617 --> 00:07:23,719
    really see me, you know?    

169
00:07:23,786 --> 00:07:27,289
    Mm! Mm! Oh, that's hot.     
        That's too hot.         

170
00:07:27,323 --> 00:07:30,726
       I just want Jo to        
 see me romantically, you know? 

171
00:07:30,793 --> 00:07:32,361
      Same! She's running       
    out of men around here.     

172
00:07:32,394 --> 00:07:35,898
  She's already dated any man   
  that would bring her a fish   

173
00:07:35,965 --> 00:07:38,501
      and I'm sitting here      
       with one grandkid.       

174
00:07:38,534 --> 00:07:40,302
   Like I'm barely a kookum.    

175
00:07:40,336 --> 00:07:42,404
       The other grannies       
    talk about me, you know.    

176
00:07:42,471 --> 00:07:43,639
        So what do I do?        

177
00:07:43,672 --> 00:07:48,010
      I'll tell you how to      
     get with my daughter.      

178
00:07:48,043 --> 00:07:50,513
  You have to be a tough guy.   

179
00:07:50,546 --> 00:07:52,715
   Yeah, yeah. I can do that.   
     I can be a tough guy.      

180
00:07:52,748 --> 00:07:54,083
         I know I don't         
     look like a tough guy,     

181
00:07:54,149 --> 00:07:56,886
      but believe you me,       
  there's a tough guy in here.  

182
00:07:56,919 --> 00:07:58,153
          - You know?           
         - (chuckling)          

183
00:07:58,187 --> 00:08:00,523
    Ah! My mouth, my mouth!     

184
00:08:00,556 --> 00:08:02,558
           (shouting)           
   Why won't you cool down?!    

185
00:08:04,260 --> 00:08:07,229
      You're listening to       
  Laughingstick in the evening  

186
00:08:07,263 --> 00:08:10,065
  and I'm still thinking about  
   the moose that died funny,   

187
00:08:10,099 --> 00:08:14,403
   and that gave me the idea    
     for today's top five.      

188
00:08:14,436 --> 00:08:16,272
       (eagle screeching)       

189
00:08:16,338 --> 00:08:20,075
   Laughingstick's Top Five.    

190
00:08:20,109 --> 00:08:22,444
         Today's list?          

191
00:08:22,511 --> 00:08:25,381
      Top five dead things      
        that died funny.        

192
00:08:25,414 --> 00:08:28,183
          Number five!          

193
00:08:28,217 --> 00:08:31,053
     That dead crow outside     
      the Ban' office was       

194
00:08:31,086 --> 00:08:33,589
  stuffed inside a pop bottle.  

195
00:08:33,622 --> 00:08:36,625
      Now, that's some bad      
     medicine right there.      

196
00:08:36,692 --> 00:08:39,194
          Number four!          

197
00:08:39,228 --> 00:08:41,196
 A dead muskrat under my porch. 

198
00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:43,098
Had a fork sticking out of it-- 

199
00:08:45,067 --> 00:08:48,470
Fuck, that moose sounds wicked. 

200
00:08:48,537 --> 00:08:49,705
  Yeah, man, this is so cool!   

201
00:08:49,738 --> 00:08:51,106
          Three of us           
    hanging out on the bus,     

202
00:08:51,140 --> 00:08:53,609
    listening to Roger talk     
about a dead moose on the radio.

203
00:08:53,642 --> 00:08:55,110
 It's just like a dream I had.  

204
00:08:55,144 --> 00:08:59,214
  Mn'ehh. Cover that shit up,   
  too, putch face. It's gross.  

205
00:08:59,248 --> 00:09:01,817
     If my face was a putch     
you'd just be scared right now. 

206
00:09:01,884 --> 00:09:03,218
   I'm proud of this hickey.    

207
00:09:03,252 --> 00:09:05,220
  It lets everyone know a lady  
    sucked on my neck today.    

208
00:09:05,254 --> 00:09:06,789
     Damn, I want a hickey.     

209
00:09:06,822 --> 00:09:08,324
         Come on, guys,         
    what am I supposed to do    

210
00:09:08,390 --> 00:09:09,491
      with Rose tomorrow?       

211
00:09:09,558 --> 00:09:11,760
        I promised I was        
   going to do something big.   

212
00:09:11,794 --> 00:09:13,262
    Dean: There's a part in     
   Rush Hour that could help.   

213
00:09:13,295 --> 00:09:16,398
    It was with Jackie Chan     
      and Lucy Liu, and...      

214
00:09:16,432 --> 00:09:18,100
     I forget what it was.      

215
00:09:18,133 --> 00:09:20,102
      But he did something      
    wicked to win her back.     

216
00:09:20,135 --> 00:09:21,637
      Let's watch it, bro.      

217
00:09:21,670 --> 00:09:23,505
  Mm, can't watch Rush Hour 1   
        without watching        

218
00:09:23,572 --> 00:09:25,441
       Rush Hour 2 and 3.       

219
00:09:25,474 --> 00:09:26,742
            Awesome!            

220
00:09:26,775 --> 00:09:28,811
  Lucy Liu, is that Rush Hour   
       or Shanghai Noon?        

221
00:09:28,844 --> 00:09:30,479
      I think he's right.       

222
00:09:30,512 --> 00:09:31,480
 You can't watch Shanghai Noon  

223
00:09:31,513 --> 00:09:32,915
        without watching        
       Shanghai Knights.        

224
00:09:32,948 --> 00:09:37,119
Are we watching three Rush Hours
    and two Shanghai movies?    

225
00:09:37,152 --> 00:09:39,254
        Because that was        
       also in my dream!        

226
00:09:39,288 --> 00:09:41,023
         Oh yeah, dude.         

227
00:09:41,090 --> 00:09:43,792
    It's been a while since     
  I did a Jackie Chan Five'r.   

228
00:09:47,162 --> 00:09:51,333
        And away we go.         

229
00:09:51,367 --> 00:09:54,103
      Paul: Chan's deadly.      
      I bet you he's Cree.      

230
00:09:54,136 --> 00:09:55,804
     Brady: I have to pee.      

231
00:09:55,838 --> 00:09:57,940
     Dean: We just started      
   this movie. Wait an hour.    

232
00:09:57,973 --> 00:09:59,675
    Brady: Okay, yeah. Good.    

233
00:09:59,708 --> 00:10:01,377
  Oh, man. I can see his wire.  

234
00:10:01,443 --> 00:10:04,013
    Dean: That's not a wire.    
   Jackie Chan can fly, bro.    

235
00:10:04,046 --> 00:10:08,017
Paul: Why you shittin' on Chan? 

236
00:10:08,050 --> 00:10:09,952
             Brady:             
  Damn, those movies age well.  

237
00:10:09,985 --> 00:10:12,221
         Yeah, but did          
      watching those help?      

238
00:10:12,287 --> 00:10:15,457
       They're more about       
  best friends than snaggin'.   

239
00:10:15,491 --> 00:10:16,625
       Yeah, that's true.       

240
00:10:16,659 --> 00:10:18,060
         I feel closer          
      to you guys already.      

241
00:10:18,127 --> 00:10:20,562
     Wait. What time is it?     

242
00:10:20,629 --> 00:10:21,630
             Uh...              

243
00:10:22,898 --> 00:10:23,866
          ...tomorrow.          

244
00:10:23,899 --> 00:10:25,634
             Shit!              

245
00:10:25,668 --> 00:10:28,037
          I still have          
    nothing to do with Rose.    

246
00:10:28,070 --> 00:10:29,071
     Fuck, I'm a dead man.      

247
00:10:31,540 --> 00:10:34,476
         Come on, guys.         
   I gotta pick her up soon!    

248
00:10:34,510 --> 00:10:36,679
 I know. Give her a free box of 
chocolates when she buys coffee.

249
00:10:36,712 --> 00:10:38,480
   I don't work at the store,   
         what is this?          

250
00:10:38,514 --> 00:10:41,050
   Oh, yeah. Jo hated it too.   

251
00:10:41,116 --> 00:10:43,852
      Fuck, I'm an idiot,       
      I'm a fuckin' idiot.      

252
00:10:43,886 --> 00:10:45,187
         He does this.          

253
00:10:45,220 --> 00:10:48,223
   Oh, wait, what's that show   
      Rose always watches?      

254
00:10:48,290 --> 00:10:49,558
         Rintin Chips?          

255
00:10:49,625 --> 00:10:52,227
         Rintin Chips?!         
It's fuckin' Restless Wind, man.

256
00:10:52,294 --> 00:10:54,196
 Oh, yeah. She loves that show. 

257
00:10:54,229 --> 00:10:55,397
       I love that show.        

258
00:10:55,464 --> 00:10:57,166
     Man, you just gotta be     
      a rugged bush Native      

259
00:10:57,199 --> 00:10:59,134
like that big dick buckskin guy.

260
00:10:59,168 --> 00:11:00,536
   I don't have any buckskin!   

261
00:11:00,569 --> 00:11:02,037
       Oh, wait. I know!        

262
00:11:02,071 --> 00:11:03,539
Take her to see that dead moose 
   Roger keeps talking about.   

263
00:11:03,572 --> 00:11:04,707
  Oh, the one from the radio!   

264
00:11:04,740 --> 00:11:07,509
             Dean:              
  Yeah. Take her on your quad.  

265
00:11:07,543 --> 00:11:09,044
         With the wind          
      blowing in her hair,      

266
00:11:09,078 --> 00:11:11,046
        she'll feel like        
 she's on the back of a horse.  

267
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,515
 Yeah, man, you standing there  
       by that dead moose       

268
00:11:13,549 --> 00:11:15,551
       looking all manly.       
I'll bet she gives you a hickey.

269
00:11:15,584 --> 00:11:19,388
       Okay, that's good.       
   Really feeling that moose.   

270
00:11:19,421 --> 00:11:21,323
      Dean: And that moose      
      is feeling you, man.      

271
00:11:27,696 --> 00:11:29,431
           Hey, man.            
  I need something like that.   

272
00:11:29,498 --> 00:11:32,267
        Something manly         
    like that to impress Jo.    

273
00:11:32,334 --> 00:11:33,569
      Okay, so how do you,      

274
00:11:33,602 --> 00:11:34,903
        a buttoned-down         
       corporate asshole,       

275
00:11:34,937 --> 00:11:37,039
 get a cool rez chick like Jo?  

276
00:11:37,072 --> 00:11:38,207
             What?              

277
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,509
       See, she only goes       
     for tough Native guys      

278
00:11:40,542 --> 00:11:42,244
     but you're a white-ass     
   marshmallow mother fucker.   

279
00:11:42,277 --> 00:11:43,612
       This is a toughie.       

280
00:11:43,679 --> 00:11:45,581
          Yeah, but--           

281
00:11:49,952 --> 00:11:52,554
       Maybe you can act        
    like a tough white guy.     

282
00:11:52,588 --> 00:11:54,757
  There's tons of movies with   
   tough white guys in them.    

283
00:11:54,790 --> 00:11:56,058
         We just gotta          
      find the right one.       

284
00:11:58,694 --> 00:12:00,629
        Damn that's hot!        

285
00:12:00,696 --> 00:12:04,199
  Oh, let's start with Grease.  

286
00:12:04,233 --> 00:12:07,469
          (whimpering)          

287
00:12:07,536 --> 00:12:12,474
   (romantic music swelling)    

288
00:12:12,541 --> 00:12:22,551
               ♪                

289
00:12:25,053 --> 00:12:26,655
             Rose:              
           Oh, Paul.            

290
00:12:29,424 --> 00:12:30,425
            Careful.            

291
00:12:31,593 --> 00:12:32,795
        Fuckin' smells.         

292
00:12:32,828 --> 00:12:34,897
   I know. That's part of it.   

293
00:12:34,930 --> 00:12:36,765
              Ah!               

294
00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:37,800
        (flies buzzing)         

295
00:12:37,833 --> 00:12:39,234
           Cool, eh?            

296
00:12:39,268 --> 00:12:41,136
     It's like it tried to      
  jump between these two trees  

297
00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:42,905
     and then it got stuck.     

298
00:12:42,938 --> 00:12:44,306
Look, babe. Look at its tongue. 

299
00:12:44,339 --> 00:12:47,442
        It went "mn'ehh"        
     right before it died.      

300
00:12:47,476 --> 00:12:50,145
     That's fucked up, bro.     

301
00:12:50,179 --> 00:12:52,014
 I know? And without you, Rose, 

302
00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:54,783
I'm kinda like this moose there.

303
00:12:54,817 --> 00:12:58,086
        Just all stuck,         
looking all fucked up and shit. 

304
00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:00,756
I'm really sorry that I got you 
 all jar'd when I took off for  

305
00:13:00,789 --> 00:13:03,025
        Winnipeg without        
      even saying goodbye,      

306
00:13:03,091 --> 00:13:04,793
    even though technically     
   we weren't even together,    

307
00:13:04,827 --> 00:13:06,428
        and even though         
       I didn't have to,        

308
00:13:06,461 --> 00:13:08,497
         I wanted to do         
   something special for you,   

309
00:13:08,530 --> 00:13:09,932
      and I know how much       
        you like nature.        

310
00:13:09,965 --> 00:13:11,033
          Not really.           

311
00:13:11,099 --> 00:13:12,167
          Well, I know          
   how much you like animals.   

312
00:13:12,201 --> 00:13:13,435
         They're fine.          

313
00:13:13,468 --> 00:13:16,872
        I just wanted to        
   tell you I love you, okay?   

314
00:13:16,939 --> 00:13:19,041
   If you actually loved me,    
 you'd know I wouldn't want to  

315
00:13:19,107 --> 00:13:20,709
  see a fuckin' killed moose.   

316
00:13:20,776 --> 00:13:23,178
       I don't think you        
 understand the metaphor here?  

317
00:13:23,212 --> 00:13:24,780
  Did Dean put you up to this?  

318
00:13:24,813 --> 00:13:25,781
             As if.             

319
00:13:25,814 --> 00:13:27,716
  Jar'd me once, shame on you.  

320
00:13:27,783 --> 00:13:29,618
Jar'd me, twice? Fuck you, man. 

321
00:13:29,651 --> 00:13:31,854
   No, no, no. You're right.    
    It was all Dean's idea.     

322
00:13:31,887 --> 00:13:34,156
 He said it would be so nature. 

323
00:13:34,189 --> 00:13:37,693
    Can't we just go back to    
   your place? and hang out?    

324
00:13:37,726 --> 00:13:39,161
        No fuckin' way.         

325
00:13:39,194 --> 00:13:40,896
   I'll find my own way back.   

326
00:13:40,963 --> 00:13:43,232
            (cawing)            

327
00:13:43,298 --> 00:13:44,533
      What are you doing?       

328
00:13:44,566 --> 00:13:47,202
      I knew this could be      
     more of your bullshit,     

329
00:13:47,236 --> 00:13:49,004
    so I had Stephen Harper     
        trail behind us.        

330
00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:50,472
     (vehicle approaching)      

331
00:13:50,505 --> 00:13:52,407
         There you are.         

332
00:13:52,474 --> 00:13:53,508
     I heard you caw-caws.      

333
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:54,743
         That's fucked.         

334
00:13:54,810 --> 00:13:57,579
         That's fucked?         
You took me to see a dead moose!

335
00:13:58,580 --> 00:14:00,415
      Is everything, okay?      

336
00:14:00,482 --> 00:14:01,683
     If it's not I'll die.      

337
00:14:01,717 --> 00:14:03,252
   Whatever, Stephen Harper.    

338
00:14:03,318 --> 00:14:05,420
        Paul, I'm sorry.        

339
00:14:05,487 --> 00:14:07,256
 I was really pulling for you.  

340
00:14:07,322 --> 00:14:09,358
         Let's just go.         

341
00:14:09,391 --> 00:14:12,594
     I swear I'm not trying     
     to pull anything here.     

342
00:14:12,661 --> 00:14:15,430
        Rose, let's just        
        talk about this!        

343
00:14:15,497 --> 00:14:17,165
 Yeah, let's all talk this out. 

344
00:14:17,199 --> 00:14:18,200
            Just go.            

345
00:14:19,701 --> 00:14:21,270
          Sorry, Paul!          

346
00:14:21,336 --> 00:14:23,839
    As if, what do you know     
about apologies, Stephen Harper?

347
00:14:28,043 --> 00:14:31,046
      This wasn't how this      
      was supposed to go!       

348
00:14:33,115 --> 00:14:35,417
      Check it out, babe.       
        Real deadly, eh?        

349
00:14:35,450 --> 00:14:37,452
              Wow!              

350
00:14:37,519 --> 00:14:39,354
 You know all the right things. 

351
00:14:39,388 --> 00:14:41,590
      I love you so much.       

352
00:14:41,623 --> 00:14:43,392
  Let me give you that hickey.  

353
00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:49,798
       What the fuck are        
      you looking at, bro?      

354
00:14:49,865 --> 00:14:51,199
         Fantasy Rose:          
    Guy's a fucking creeper.    

355
00:14:51,233 --> 00:14:52,634
Let's throw fucking mud at him. 

356
00:14:54,536 --> 00:14:56,071
             Paul:              
       I'm not a creeper!       

357
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,105
      I was day dreaming!       

358
00:14:59,041 --> 00:15:00,609
  Get out of here you weirdo!   

359
00:15:00,642 --> 00:15:01,643
             Yeah!              

360
00:15:04,112 --> 00:15:05,981
 This thing is fucking fucked!  
        Fuck this, man.         

361
00:15:06,048 --> 00:15:08,317
    Fantasy Paul: (laughing)    
         What a loser.          

362
00:15:10,619 --> 00:15:14,022
   ♪ You are my first love ♪    

363
00:15:14,056 --> 00:15:15,590
           (knocking)           

364
00:15:15,624 --> 00:15:17,793
           (knocking)           
          Jo! It's me.          

365
00:15:19,294 --> 00:15:22,030
 Quit it with all the knocking. 

366
00:15:23,398 --> 00:15:25,434
  What? My toilet's backed up.  

367
00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:27,402
    Shit, Jo, you look hot.     

368
00:15:27,436 --> 00:15:28,470
          Oh, really?           

369
00:15:28,537 --> 00:15:31,073
      I'm up to my elbows       
        in the crapper.         

370
00:15:31,106 --> 00:15:32,441
   What the hell do you want?   

371
00:15:32,474 --> 00:15:33,709
         You hear that          
     me and Lisa are done?      

372
00:15:33,742 --> 00:15:35,711
           (groaning)           

373
00:15:35,744 --> 00:15:37,279
She got busted smuggling coke up
 to the rez in a meatball sub.  

374
00:15:37,312 --> 00:15:39,948
       That woman's brain       
       is a meatball sub.       

375
00:15:39,982 --> 00:15:41,216
            I know.             

376
00:15:43,151 --> 00:15:45,253
You know, now that she's in jail

377
00:15:45,287 --> 00:15:47,556
       I've been thinking       
        about you tons.         

378
00:15:47,589 --> 00:15:49,624
        Don't you even--        

379
00:15:49,658 --> 00:15:50,625
             What?              

380
00:15:50,659 --> 00:15:52,127
       You cheated on me.       

381
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,396
     It was pow wow season!     

382
00:15:56,631 --> 00:15:59,301
    Okay, what if this time     
         I try not to?          

383
00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:01,169
        What do you say?        

384
00:16:01,236 --> 00:16:02,571
         What do I say?         

385
00:16:02,604 --> 00:16:05,173
    How about that I'd like     
  to hang you up by your hair   

386
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:07,476
    and speed bag your nuts     
       until you cough up       

387
00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:08,977
    at least one of them up?    

388
00:16:09,011 --> 00:16:11,646
       You think you can        
    just show up to my door,    

389
00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:13,281
       looking all cool,        

390
00:16:13,315 --> 00:16:16,585
  and think I'm just going to   
  fall back in love with you?   

391
00:16:16,618 --> 00:16:17,786
           Fuck that.           

392
00:16:18,987 --> 00:16:20,589
          Hey, Brady.           

393
00:16:20,622 --> 00:16:22,090
              Hey.              

394
00:16:22,124 --> 00:16:24,693
       Don't mind Garry.        
   He was just going to hell.   

395
00:16:28,163 --> 00:16:29,498
        Good luck, bro.         

396
00:16:29,531 --> 00:16:31,166
       She's on her moon.       

397
00:16:33,969 --> 00:16:36,471
       Brady, why are you       
        carrying a fish?        

398
00:16:36,505 --> 00:16:38,540
    I found it. You want it?    

399
00:16:38,607 --> 00:16:40,542
   I don't want a ditch-fish.   

400
00:16:40,609 --> 00:16:42,144
         Yeah, totally.         

401
00:16:42,177 --> 00:16:44,179
     So, you're just trying     
     to attract bears now?      

402
00:16:45,814 --> 00:16:47,115
        Everything okay?        

403
00:16:47,149 --> 00:16:48,150
            I, um...            

404
00:16:50,652 --> 00:16:52,320
 I burned the roof of my mouth. 

405
00:16:52,354 --> 00:16:54,456
        First with soup         
   and then a toaster waffle.   

406
00:16:54,489 --> 00:16:56,024
    Well, you want some ice?    

407
00:16:56,058 --> 00:16:58,026
Yeah, that's what I'm here for. 
             Yeah.              

408
00:16:58,060 --> 00:16:59,161
             Okay.              

409
00:17:01,329 --> 00:17:02,898
         Just hold on.          

410
00:17:05,901 --> 00:17:06,902
           (sniffing)           

411
00:17:09,471 --> 00:17:11,306
            Dammit.             

412
00:17:11,339 --> 00:17:12,340
             Here.              

413
00:17:12,374 --> 00:17:14,042
        It's all I got.         

414
00:17:16,011 --> 00:17:18,580
     That's perfect. Cool.      

415
00:17:18,647 --> 00:17:20,048
          No problem.           

416
00:17:22,517 --> 00:17:27,022
      Hey, uh, if I get in      
  trouble with my mouth again,  

417
00:17:27,055 --> 00:17:28,323
        can I call you?         

418
00:17:28,356 --> 00:17:29,991
      Sure. Whatever, man.      

419
00:17:32,861 --> 00:17:38,900
               ♪                

420
00:17:38,934 --> 00:17:42,037
       (eagle screeching)       

421
00:17:42,070 --> 00:17:44,940
     Fucking Dean. This is      
  nothing like Restless Wind.   

422
00:17:46,575 --> 00:17:48,944
     I just wanna go home!      

423
00:17:49,010 --> 00:17:50,846
  I hate you so much, the sun!  

424
00:17:50,879 --> 00:17:54,683
  Ah, fucking Stephen Harper.   
         Fucking quad!          

425
00:17:54,716 --> 00:17:55,851
           (howling)            

426
00:17:58,854 --> 00:18:01,423
       (insects buzzing)        

427
00:18:01,456 --> 00:18:03,258
      I hate you, the sun!      

428
00:18:04,926 --> 00:18:06,561
      Roger: Under the O.       

429
00:18:06,595 --> 00:18:08,430
      Agnes: 67, come on!       

430
00:18:08,463 --> 00:18:09,464
     I've got a sweat here.     

431
00:18:09,531 --> 00:18:11,533
         My baby needs          
      a new pair of pants!      

432
00:18:11,566 --> 00:18:14,603
Roger: O-64. 64 was a good year.

433
00:18:14,636 --> 00:18:17,239
            (crying)            

434
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:22,110
           (grunting)           

435
00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:24,146
           (echoing)            
             Mama!              

436
00:18:24,212 --> 00:18:25,280
            My baby!            

437
00:18:27,382 --> 00:18:35,557
               ♪                

438
00:18:35,590 --> 00:18:36,591
              Aw.               

439
00:18:47,035 --> 00:18:48,403
Roger: Lines are open, go ahead.

440
00:18:48,436 --> 00:18:49,938
             Rita:              
 No one picked me up yesterday. 

441
00:18:50,005 --> 00:18:51,339
             Rita?              

442
00:18:51,373 --> 00:18:53,441
    Rita: Don't got no eggs     
  and my foot's still busted.   

443
00:18:53,508 --> 00:18:56,111
     Nobody picked up Rita?     

444
00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:57,946
   The lady just needs eggs.    

445
00:18:58,013 --> 00:19:00,282
           You know,            
    back in my day there was    

446
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:02,617
a certain way we treated elders.

447
00:19:02,684 --> 00:19:04,753
     Am I the only one that     
     respects them anymore?     

448
00:19:04,786 --> 00:19:06,021
       Line 2, go ahead.        

449
00:19:06,054 --> 00:19:07,222
           (knocking)           

450
00:19:07,255 --> 00:19:08,690
             Dean:              
 Why don't you go get her, bro? 

451
00:19:08,723 --> 00:19:10,725
   Roger: Because I'm running   
     a radio station, Dean.     

452
00:19:10,759 --> 00:19:13,228
           Oh, Rita.            
     Brought you some eggs.     

453
00:19:13,261 --> 00:19:14,696
         On the house.          

454
00:19:14,729 --> 00:19:15,864
     Sorry about your foot.     

455
00:19:15,897 --> 00:19:18,633
     Oh. Thank you, my boy.     

456
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:21,469
     Oh, you look so tough.     

457
00:19:21,536 --> 00:19:23,271
     How are you so single?     

458
00:19:23,305 --> 00:19:24,906
         I know, right?         

459
00:19:24,940 --> 00:19:26,474
        Have a good one.        

460
00:19:26,541 --> 00:19:28,743
     Dean: And you're just      
sitting there on your flat ar-- 

461
00:19:28,777 --> 00:19:31,246
Whoops, looks like we lost Dean.

462
00:19:31,279 --> 00:19:33,882
       We're having some        
  technical difficulties here.  

463
00:19:44,426 --> 00:19:47,229
    ♪ A big wave will come ♪    

464
00:19:47,262 --> 00:19:48,797
       ♪ And wash away ♪        

465
00:19:48,830 --> 00:19:50,565
     ♪ The ancient world ♪      

466
00:19:52,067 --> 00:19:56,104
        ♪ A burning soul        
       on turning heels ♪       

467
00:19:56,137 --> 00:19:57,772
       ♪ Nowhere to go ♪        

468
00:20:00,075 --> 00:20:02,677
          ♪ Together ♪          

469
00:20:02,744 --> 00:20:06,581
    ♪ We'll overcome, yeah ♪