1 00:00:01,335 --> 00:00:02,836 LAINEY: My first year at William Penn, 2 00:00:02,870 --> 00:00:04,772 I thought I'd really connected with the students. 3 00:00:04,805 --> 00:00:07,508 But then, over the summer, Barry and I saw 4 00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:09,743 Dangerous Minds, starring Michelle Pfeiffer. 5 00:00:09,777 --> 00:00:12,180 There are no victims in this classroom! 6 00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:14,182 LAINEY: Seeing that movie made me realize 7 00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:15,483 I could go deeper, 8 00:00:15,516 --> 00:00:17,785 really get involved with these kids, which they need, 9 00:00:17,818 --> 00:00:21,322 because they are dealing with a lot of scary stuff. 10 00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:23,424 For my second year back, I was determined to get 11 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:26,594 all up in their business by going full Pfeiffer. 12 00:00:26,627 --> 00:00:28,262 (COOLIO'S GANGSTA'S PARADISE PLAYS) 13 00:00:28,296 --> 00:00:29,963 (INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS) 14 00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,369 Good. I got your attention. 15 00:00:39,207 --> 00:00:41,475 Sextuplets. Six notes per measure. 16 00:00:41,509 --> 00:00:42,843 Oh, yeah, we're goin' there. 17 00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:44,212 (STUDENTS GROAN) Oh, come on. 18 00:00:44,245 --> 00:00:46,347 Welcome to Guitar 2. Any questions? 19 00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:48,982 Yeah, why are you dressed like Olivia Newton-John at the end of Grease? 20 00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:51,119 (LAUGHTER) I'm not. 21 00:00:51,152 --> 00:00:52,886 I'm dressed like your worst nightmare. 22 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:54,488 A teacher who cares. 23 00:01:02,029 --> 00:01:03,664 The curriculum says the first song we're learning 24 00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:05,199 is Row, Row, Row Your Boat. 25 00:01:05,233 --> 00:01:06,567 (CHUCKLES) 26 00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:07,735 That's not real-life stuff. 27 00:01:07,768 --> 00:01:09,670 How many of you have ever even rowed a boat? 28 00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:12,840 But was it gently down a stream? 29 00:01:14,942 --> 00:01:16,009 Exactly. 30 00:01:16,043 --> 00:01:17,978 I want to teach music that speaks to me, 31 00:01:18,011 --> 00:01:19,046 like Fiona Apple. 32 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,649 What song speaks to you, Bobby Maloney? 33 00:01:21,682 --> 00:01:24,051 Is Row, Row, Row Your Boat definitely off the table? 34 00:01:24,985 --> 00:01:26,254 What about you, Aaron Rubin? 35 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:27,388 Who Let the Dogs Out? 36 00:01:28,122 --> 00:01:29,190 Ow! 37 00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:31,325 Why would you throw that? 38 00:01:31,359 --> 00:01:33,394 As your prize for a great answer. 39 00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:35,396 Next time, you should try throwing it to somebody 40 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:36,930 with better hand-eye coordination. 41 00:01:36,964 --> 00:01:40,201 Like my blind grandma. (LAUGHTER) 42 00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:42,403 Sure, Ronnie. Laugh through the pain. 43 00:01:42,436 --> 00:01:45,239 But having a blind grandma sounds heavy. 44 00:01:45,273 --> 00:01:46,574 If you ever want to rap about it... 45 00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:48,509 Yeah, I'd like that. 46 00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:50,711 It's been hard 'cause she has to touch my face 47 00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:52,813 with her weird old-lady hands all the time. 48 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:56,684 Veronica, when parents are stressed, 49 00:01:56,717 --> 00:01:58,452 sometimes, the children feel the pain. 50 00:01:58,486 --> 00:02:00,087 But you're a resilient young woman. 51 00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:01,889 You will get through this kitchen remodel. 52 00:02:01,922 --> 00:02:05,058 To make toast, I have to walk all the way to the garage. 53 00:02:05,092 --> 00:02:07,561 Hey, there are no victims in this classroom. 54 00:02:07,595 --> 00:02:09,029 But if you start to feel overwhelmed, 55 00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:11,965 you can call me anytime on my new mobile phone. 56 00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:14,402 555-0159. 57 00:02:14,435 --> 00:02:15,869 I may take you up on that. 58 00:02:15,903 --> 00:02:17,771 My parents are picking out tile tonight, 59 00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,039 and they're a mile apart. 60 00:02:19,072 --> 00:02:20,107 Good luck. 61 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:21,242 Rick! 62 00:02:21,275 --> 00:02:22,876 How was your summer? 63 00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:24,612 I went zip-lining in Costa Rica, 64 00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:27,080 and I fed fresh clams to a capuchin monkey. 65 00:02:27,114 --> 00:02:30,451 Hmm. Nobody tells you what to do when you run out of clams. 66 00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:33,153 I heard you giving out your personal phone number to a student. 67 00:02:33,187 --> 00:02:35,223 This year, I decided I wanna give these kids more. 68 00:02:35,256 --> 00:02:37,157 Classic second-year-teacher mistake. 69 00:02:37,191 --> 00:02:39,627 They suck you in with their needy, little faces, 70 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:41,629 and the next thing you know, you're at their house, 71 00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:43,997 pretending to be their butler so you can impress 72 00:02:44,031 --> 00:02:46,567 some rich girl they met at soccer camp. 73 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:47,635 On the plus side, 74 00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:50,103 I did learn how to make a mean beef Wellington. 75 00:02:50,137 --> 00:02:51,239 I would totally do that. 76 00:02:51,272 --> 00:02:52,806 As your mentor, I have to say that 77 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:55,142 getting too close will end up biting you in the ass, 78 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:58,979 like a small but aggressive monkey jonesing for clams. 79 00:02:59,012 --> 00:03:02,082 * One of these days You're gonna get outta here * 80 00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:04,752 * Live your life And finally be free * 81 00:03:04,785 --> 00:03:07,721 * Go where you wanna go Do what you wanna do * 82 00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:11,292 * Someday, you will say "Those were the days" * 83 00:03:11,325 --> 00:03:13,994 Barry, guess what. I'm walking into the hallway. 84 00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:16,163 I know! The reception is so clear! 85 00:03:17,498 --> 00:03:19,300 I said it's clear. 86 00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:21,369 Wait. Hold on. You're breaking up. 87 00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:23,337 Breaking up! 88 00:03:23,371 --> 00:03:25,873 No! No, no! Not us! No, we're not breaking up! 89 00:03:25,906 --> 00:03:27,941 Barry, are you crying? 90 00:03:27,975 --> 00:03:29,009 (MOBILE PHONE BEEPS) Mm. 91 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,378 This thing is a miracle. 92 00:03:30,411 --> 00:03:32,212 Wow. Looks like Lainey Lewis 93 00:03:32,246 --> 00:03:34,315 joined the space program over the summer. 94 00:03:34,348 --> 00:03:35,683 Barry and I got them so we can stay 95 00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:37,351 in constant contact with each other. 96 00:03:37,385 --> 00:03:40,288 We are crushing the long-distance-relationship thing. 97 00:03:40,321 --> 00:03:42,055 So, you guys made it through the summer, then? 98 00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:43,891 Ah. Man, that's good. 99 00:03:43,924 --> 00:03:45,726 Still going strong, like Brad and Gwyneth. 100 00:03:45,759 --> 00:03:47,561 Brad and Gwyny are splitsville. 101 00:03:47,595 --> 00:03:49,062 But they got the same haircut! 102 00:03:49,096 --> 00:03:50,464 I had a pretty bitchin' summer. 103 00:03:50,498 --> 00:03:53,200 I, uh... I did the whole Renaissance Faire circuit. 104 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,303 I threw some pottery. Oh. You all have 105 00:03:55,336 --> 00:03:57,037 some Swedish butter pots coming, by the way. 106 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:59,072 So, where's this new teacher we're supposed to be meeting? 107 00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:01,141 I just left a bunch of unsupervised fourth-graders 108 00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:02,710 to Clorox my gym mats. 109 00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:04,211 Oh! Well, here she is now. 110 00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,579 Everyone... C.B.: Hey! 111 00:04:05,613 --> 00:04:08,248 ...this is our new biology teacher, Miss Wilma Howell. 112 00:04:08,282 --> 00:04:09,350 (CHUCKLES) Hi. 113 00:04:09,383 --> 00:04:11,251 I was clever enough to steal Wilma away 114 00:04:11,285 --> 00:04:13,053 from my good friend the commandant 115 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:14,555 at Valley Forge Prep. 116 00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:16,990 If you've never heard a Marine Colonel sobbing on the phone, 117 00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:20,160 it is actually very unsettling. 118 00:04:20,193 --> 00:04:22,229 He's a good friend and a real American hero. 119 00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:23,531 What do you got there? 120 00:04:23,564 --> 00:04:25,299 Treats on the first day, huh? 121 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:28,168 Oh, are these mochi balls? 122 00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:29,236 Actually, mouse-y balls. 123 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,639 Frozen baby mice I feed to my classroom snake. 124 00:04:32,873 --> 00:04:34,508 That's really upsetting. 125 00:04:34,542 --> 00:04:37,244 It's biology. Circle of life. 126 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,146 Sadly, nothing will shock these kids. 127 00:04:39,179 --> 00:04:40,848 They see worse out there every day 128 00:04:40,881 --> 00:04:42,616 in this snake-eat-mice world. 129 00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:44,352 Do I need to put my name on this? 130 00:04:44,385 --> 00:04:46,687 Uh, I think the whole freezer's yours now. 131 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,789 Uh, let me get my lean cuisines out of there. 132 00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:50,358 What? It's how Coop keeps it tight. 133 00:04:50,391 --> 00:04:52,860 Must be a culture shock, Wilma, coming from a military school. 134 00:04:52,893 --> 00:04:55,729 Well, if it helps ease the transition at all, 135 00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:57,398 please feel free to call me Colonel Fun. 136 00:04:57,431 --> 00:05:00,067 Oh, by the way, Friday is Pajama Day, 137 00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:02,235 and that's an order from the colonel. 138 00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:03,303 Yes! (ALL MURMURING) 139 00:05:03,337 --> 00:05:05,305 All you folks here are all so, uh, cheerful 140 00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:07,074 and nice. C.B.: Thank you. 141 00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:09,777 We're actually trying to change the official school motto 142 00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:11,745 to "Hakuna Matata." (CHUCKLES) 143 00:05:11,779 --> 00:05:13,747 Yes, but we're getting a surprising amount 144 00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:15,248 of pushback from Disney legal. 145 00:05:15,282 --> 00:05:17,317 (EXHALES) I'm just a little confused 146 00:05:17,351 --> 00:05:19,219 as to what you have to be so happy about. 147 00:05:19,252 --> 00:05:21,955 Based on my classes so far, 148 00:05:21,989 --> 00:05:23,891 your kids are a bunch of dum-dums. 149 00:05:23,924 --> 00:05:25,959 Ooh! New teacher coming in hot! 150 00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,260 Solid hire! 151 00:05:27,294 --> 00:05:29,930 We try to steer clear of labeling our students "dum-dums." 152 00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:32,666 Yeah, we like to refer to them as "future achievers." 153 00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:35,102 That sounds like a nice way to say "somebody else's problem." 154 00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:36,770 Well, thank you. 155 00:05:36,804 --> 00:05:38,305 I'm here to teach hard science, 156 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:40,508 not coddle them with pajama parties. 157 00:05:40,541 --> 00:05:43,010 To be clear, the pajamas are not for the students. 158 00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:44,445 No, that's a faculty thing. 159 00:05:44,478 --> 00:05:46,647 This is what I sleep in, so I'm good to go. 160 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,115 LAINEY: Wilma, I reach my students 161 00:05:48,148 --> 00:05:51,118 by getting in their faces and into their lives. 162 00:05:51,151 --> 00:05:52,920 Which is why I'm taking them all out to Six Flags, 163 00:05:52,953 --> 00:05:53,987 like Michelle Pfeiffer. 164 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:55,456 That makes absolutely no sense. 165 00:05:55,489 --> 00:05:56,524 MELLOR: This is what I've been telling her. 166 00:05:56,557 --> 00:05:58,358 You drive a bunch of kids to the amusement park, 167 00:05:58,392 --> 00:05:59,927 they start to treat you like a chauffeur. 168 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,294 And that's halfway to a butler. 169 00:06:01,328 --> 00:06:03,096 Rick, I really appreciate all the help 170 00:06:03,130 --> 00:06:05,165 you gave me last year, when I was a newbie. 171 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,800 It was adorable how pathetic you were. 172 00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,168 She was like Bambi in that scene 173 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:09,837 where he's slipping on the ice. (CHUCKLES) 174 00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:12,540 Bambi. Clumsy idiot. 175 00:06:12,573 --> 00:06:13,874 Yeah, but I'm not slipping now, 176 00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:15,242 and I don't need a mentor anymore. 177 00:06:15,275 --> 00:06:18,111 Well, as your mentor, I'd have to advise against that decision. 178 00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:20,981 From now on, I want to chart my own course 179 00:06:21,014 --> 00:06:24,785 by being exactly like Michelle Pfeiffer. 180 00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:26,053 You mean like one of those teachers 181 00:06:26,086 --> 00:06:27,354 that's always there for their students 182 00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:28,622 when they have no one else to turn to? 183 00:06:28,656 --> 00:06:30,424 Plus, her bone structure. The woman is flawless. 184 00:06:34,361 --> 00:06:36,730 LAINEY: It turns out taking 30 kids to Six Flags... 185 00:06:36,764 --> 00:06:38,365 Excuse us. So sorry. LAINEY: ...was prohibitively expensive. 186 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:39,667 Popcorn run. 187 00:06:39,700 --> 00:06:41,502 LAINEY: I settled on a more manageable class outing. 188 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:43,671 (MOBILE PHONE RINGING) 189 00:06:43,704 --> 00:06:44,838 (MOBILE PHONE BEEPS) 190 00:06:44,872 --> 00:06:46,640 Barry, guess where you're calling me now. 191 00:06:46,674 --> 00:06:48,075 I'm in a movie theater. (LAUGHS) 192 00:06:48,108 --> 00:06:49,677 Shh! 193 00:06:49,710 --> 00:06:51,144 Wait, who is this? 194 00:06:51,178 --> 00:06:52,446 Let me step outside. 195 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,381 Yeah, I'm speaking on a mobile phone, so I can go anywhere. 196 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:55,716 MAN: Please do! 197 00:06:56,717 --> 00:06:58,051 LAINEY: Who am I talking to? 198 00:06:58,085 --> 00:07:01,522 MAN: (ON SPEAKER) This is WYSP 94.1 on your radio dial. 199 00:07:01,555 --> 00:07:03,724 Your name was chosen at random to win tickets 200 00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:06,059 to see Fiona Apple tonight at the Trocadero. 201 00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:07,160 Congratulations! 202 00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:08,328 Oh, my God. 203 00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:09,997 Are you serious? I love Fiona Apple. 204 00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:12,065 MAN: Bring a guitar, because you're invited 205 00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:13,901 to jam with Fiona before the show. 206 00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:15,368 Just go to her tour bus and say 207 00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:17,771 "I'm ready for my Apple jam." And be persistent. 208 00:07:17,805 --> 00:07:20,508 Security may not be familiar with your contest prize. 209 00:07:20,541 --> 00:07:21,942 Thank you so much. 210 00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:23,677 I literally can die now. (CHUCKLES) 211 00:07:23,711 --> 00:07:25,679 Or at least after Fiona and I become best friends 212 00:07:25,713 --> 00:07:27,915 and record a live album at Red Rocks. (MOBILE PHONE BEEPS) 213 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,217 By the way, Lainey Lewis. 214 00:07:30,250 --> 00:07:32,219 Rock star by night, teacher star by day. 215 00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:37,157 Oh, crap! I forgot about the kids! 216 00:07:39,226 --> 00:07:41,094 LAINEY: Over the next few days, CB saw more of 217 00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,295 Wilma Howell's teaching style 218 00:07:42,329 --> 00:07:43,764 and found he didn't quite like it. 219 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,733 What is going on? 220 00:07:45,766 --> 00:07:48,401 That new biology teacher's punishing us. 221 00:07:48,435 --> 00:07:50,638 I couldn't explain how the human heart works. 222 00:07:50,671 --> 00:07:52,205 But who amongst us can? 223 00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:53,273 Everybody in there. 224 00:07:53,306 --> 00:07:55,075 Okay, you clowns are dismissed. 225 00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:56,910 Go disappoint some other teacher. 226 00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:01,982 (SIGHS) I know you meant "clown" as an insult, Wilma, 227 00:08:02,015 --> 00:08:04,818 but as a graduate of Barnum & Bailey University, 228 00:08:04,852 --> 00:08:06,787 I take that as the highest of compliments, 229 00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,322 so... thank you very much. 230 00:08:09,356 --> 00:08:10,924 (INHALES SHARPLY) 231 00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:13,426 Tom Scott. What are you up to, man? 232 00:08:13,460 --> 00:08:16,496 He's not allowed to leave until he puts that skeleton back together. 233 00:08:16,530 --> 00:08:18,666 I got a C-minus on my anatomy test. 234 00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:21,001 That Operation game is very misleading. 235 00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:22,736 You don't think you're being a little bit too harsh? 236 00:08:22,770 --> 00:08:24,337 If anything, I'm getting soft. 237 00:08:24,371 --> 00:08:26,674 My last C-minus kid is that skeleton. 238 00:08:26,707 --> 00:08:28,341 Am I any closer, Ms. Howell? 239 00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:30,611 Tom, you've seen a person before, right? 240 00:08:30,644 --> 00:08:32,746 Well, yeah, but only with skin on. 241 00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:34,815 I've worked with your kind at other schools, CB. 242 00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,183 You're the "fun" teacher. 243 00:08:36,216 --> 00:08:38,018 Hey, if the students are having fun, 244 00:08:38,051 --> 00:08:39,587 they don't even notice they're learning. 245 00:08:39,620 --> 00:08:41,421 Because maybe they're not. 246 00:08:41,454 --> 00:08:43,456 I'm less worried about entertaining them 247 00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:45,358 than making sure they're ready to go out into a world 248 00:08:45,392 --> 00:08:47,961 that's not in the mood to cut them any slack. 249 00:08:48,428 --> 00:08:49,797 Ms. Howell? 250 00:08:49,830 --> 00:08:53,266 I don't have my report on the circulatory system. 251 00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:54,768 It's been a tough week. 252 00:08:54,802 --> 00:08:56,604 My parakeet died. 253 00:08:56,637 --> 00:08:58,972 We had a memorial in the English class. 254 00:08:59,006 --> 00:09:01,875 We lit candles and we sang On Eagle's Wings. 255 00:09:01,909 --> 00:09:03,977 And I made a clever adjustment of the lyrics. 256 00:09:04,011 --> 00:09:05,445 Yeah, we can all picture what that adjust... 257 00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:09,216 I made it "parakeet wings." (CHUCKLES) 258 00:09:09,249 --> 00:09:12,252 This must be a painful time for you, Debra. 259 00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:15,488 I'll need you to bring me in the dead bird, please. 260 00:09:15,522 --> 00:09:16,724 What? What kind of child 261 00:09:16,757 --> 00:09:20,193 would lie about a dead pet just to get out of an assignment? 262 00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:22,863 All of them. Worst-case scenario, I'm wrong, 263 00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:24,898 Debra brings in the bird, I apologize, 264 00:09:24,932 --> 00:09:27,968 and we have a really cool specimen to dissect in class. 265 00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:31,004 Either the bird or your assignment on my desk tomorrow. 266 00:09:31,038 --> 00:09:32,272 Your call. 267 00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:33,741 (SCOFFS) This is so unfair! 268 00:09:33,774 --> 00:09:35,542 See? She gets it. 269 00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:37,177 (SIGHS) 270 00:09:37,210 --> 00:09:38,511 I can't believe I fell for it. 271 00:09:38,545 --> 00:09:40,213 I'm standing there with my stupid guitar, 272 00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:43,050 like a crazy stalker, pounding on Fiona Apple's tour bus, 273 00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,819 when suddenly, I get dragged off by her security team. 274 00:09:45,853 --> 00:09:47,420 If they don't call themselves the "Apple Corps," 275 00:09:47,454 --> 00:09:49,156 they are missing a bet. 276 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:50,390 This cruel but ingenious prank 277 00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:53,426 was obviously perpetrated by one of your jerk-dip students. 278 00:09:53,460 --> 00:09:54,762 She's doling out her number 279 00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:57,097 like a teacher who paints houses on the weekend. 280 00:09:57,130 --> 00:09:58,932 Oh. That actually reminds me. 281 00:09:58,966 --> 00:10:00,467 I gave my number to one kid. 282 00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:02,870 MELLOR: And by now, it's being spread all over the school like head lice. 283 00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:04,404 You need to figure out who did this 284 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:06,406 and come down on them like a ton of bricks. 285 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:07,941 If anything, I'm gonna come down on them 286 00:10:07,975 --> 00:10:10,077 with a ton of understanding and compassion. 287 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,879 You crossed a boundary with these kids, 288 00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:13,280 and you lost their respect. 289 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:15,482 Yes, and loss of respect is no laughing matter. 290 00:10:15,515 --> 00:10:18,385 (CHUCKLES) Unless you're the brilliant Rodney Dangerfield. 291 00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:19,720 But even then, I can sense 292 00:10:19,753 --> 00:10:22,255 a certain amount of pain behind the laughter. 293 00:10:22,289 --> 00:10:24,958 This is exactly when a mentor comes in handy. 294 00:10:24,992 --> 00:10:26,760 When you finally come to your senses, Lewis, 295 00:10:26,794 --> 00:10:29,462 I'm perfectly willing to be begged. 296 00:10:29,496 --> 00:10:31,732 For the record, I think it's great that Lainey wants 297 00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:33,466 to be more open and trusting with the kids. 298 00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:36,636 I refuse to see the world as some dark Darwinian hellscape 299 00:10:36,670 --> 00:10:39,206 where the freezers are packed full of dead baby mice 300 00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:41,574 that are easily mistaken for popcorn shrimp. 301 00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:43,944 CB accidentally ate one shrimp-mouse, 302 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:46,279 and now, all of a sudden, he has a grudge against Wilma. 303 00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:48,716 She's outrageously strict with her students, John. 304 00:10:48,749 --> 00:10:51,451 She's also an outrageously great teacher, CB. 305 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,253 MAN: (ON RADIO) Just go to her tour bus and say 306 00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:54,421 "I'm ready for my Apple jam." 307 00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:55,588 LAINEY: Wait. That's the radio guy. 308 00:10:55,622 --> 00:10:57,791 Were you in on it? Coop, what the hell? 309 00:10:57,825 --> 00:10:58,892 No! 310 00:10:58,926 --> 00:11:00,493 All I did was confiscate this Talkboy thingie 311 00:11:00,527 --> 00:11:02,162 from Aaron Rubin in my Spanish class 312 00:11:02,195 --> 00:11:04,164 'cause he kept making it say "sacapuntas." 313 00:11:04,197 --> 00:11:06,333 What does that mean? "Pencil sharpener." 314 00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:08,568 Oh! Such a beautiful language. 315 00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,770 It was Aaron Rubin? 316 00:11:09,803 --> 00:11:11,338 Do you want me to call him into my office? 317 00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:13,473 I've been practicing my looks of stern disapproval. 318 00:11:14,942 --> 00:11:15,976 C.B.: Are you doing it now? 319 00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:17,444 'Cause it actually looks friendlier. 320 00:11:17,477 --> 00:11:19,980 I am cursed with my grandmother's kind eyes. 321 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:21,348 I don't want to punish Aaron. 322 00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:22,916 He's having trouble making high-school friends. 323 00:11:22,950 --> 00:11:24,317 That's why he acted out. 324 00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,153 I'm gonna sit him down and figure out what's going on 325 00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:27,988 inside that dangerous mind of his. 326 00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:29,589 He's always been an awkward kid. 327 00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:30,924 Yeah, he has the body of a child 328 00:11:30,958 --> 00:11:33,493 and the head of someone trying to sell you insurance. 329 00:11:35,462 --> 00:11:38,465 Aaron! Word's out! Ms. Lewis knows you pranked her! 330 00:11:38,498 --> 00:11:42,102 But it's weird. She hasn't called my parents, no principal's office, 331 00:11:42,135 --> 00:11:44,037 and get this... When I saw her this morning, 332 00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:45,939 she said... (IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) "Hi, Aaron." 333 00:11:45,973 --> 00:11:47,841 She's just messing with you before she strikes. 334 00:11:47,875 --> 00:11:49,709 Just like that snake in Ms. Howell's class 335 00:11:49,743 --> 00:11:52,112 plays with the mouse before eating it. LAINEY: Hi, Aaron. 336 00:11:52,145 --> 00:11:53,446 Can I see you for a minute? 337 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:54,848 (IN NORMAL VOICE) Me and Bobby are actually in the middle of a... 338 00:11:56,016 --> 00:11:58,618 We'll finish that up later, buddy. 339 00:11:58,651 --> 00:12:00,954 Hey, Rick? You wanted to see me? 340 00:12:00,988 --> 00:12:03,490 No, Coop. You wanted to see me. 341 00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,826 "Coop, come see me. Mellor." 342 00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:08,328 And you are gonna be delighted that you decided to stop by. 343 00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:09,763 Again, not my idea. 344 00:12:09,797 --> 00:12:11,364 You see, the thing is, I currently have an opening 345 00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:12,833 in my stable of mentees. 346 00:12:12,866 --> 00:12:13,901 Your... Your stable of what? 347 00:12:13,934 --> 00:12:16,904 I'm mentoring you, man! Congratulations! 348 00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:18,305 See, currently, as a Spanish teacher, 349 00:12:18,338 --> 00:12:20,173 you are just bueno. 350 00:12:20,207 --> 00:12:22,075 But I can help you up your game 351 00:12:22,109 --> 00:12:25,545 until you are el profesor excelente. 352 00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:27,714 Oh, I see. You're looking for a rebound mentee 353 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,249 because Lainey Lewis dumped you. 354 00:12:29,282 --> 00:12:31,051 I've had my eye on you for years. 355 00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,420 You got a lot of raw talent just waiting to be molded. 356 00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:36,756 For example, let's take a look at your current class formation. 357 00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:38,725 Now, you got a lot of your weaker students 358 00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,828 riding the bench in the back. 359 00:12:40,861 --> 00:12:43,596 I say you move them down to the middle, 360 00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:45,365 and you flank them on both sides 361 00:12:45,398 --> 00:12:46,934 with some of your varsity Spanish speakers. 362 00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:49,436 For example, like that exchange student from Barcelona. 363 00:12:49,469 --> 00:12:51,438 That kid is a friggin' natural. 364 00:12:51,471 --> 00:12:53,106 You build your offense around him, 365 00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,541 and then you blitz these scrubs nonstop 366 00:12:54,574 --> 00:12:58,345 with the "Como estas" and the "Como te llamas" 367 00:12:58,378 --> 00:13:00,747 And you ride this kid all the way to the postseason. 368 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,250 That'd be summer school. 369 00:13:03,283 --> 00:13:04,885 I'm gonna be on a cruise with my family. 370 00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:07,220 Well, if you don't want it, I can't want it for you. 371 00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:08,956 Yeah, I don't want it. 372 00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:10,958 You'll be back! 373 00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:13,894 So, listen, we both know 374 00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:16,129 what went down with the Fiona Apple prank. 375 00:13:16,163 --> 00:13:18,631 I hate to see a good kid getting hooked on pranks. 376 00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:21,101 You're sweating, Aaron. You want a Snapple? Yeah, right! 377 00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:22,602 I see what you're trying to do. 378 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,038 There's Tabasco sauce in there. Or wizz. 379 00:13:25,072 --> 00:13:27,040 Trust me, I have no intention of pranking you. 380 00:13:27,074 --> 00:13:29,809 That's exactly what you would say if you were going to prank me. 381 00:13:29,843 --> 00:13:31,711 But it's also what I'd say if I wasn't. 382 00:13:31,744 --> 00:13:33,413 I get it, you're in high school now, 383 00:13:33,446 --> 00:13:35,115 and you're feeling lost socially. 384 00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,583 You want to know what I turned to 385 00:13:36,616 --> 00:13:38,318 to find my way as an awkward teen? 386 00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:41,154 Grab that guitar. Let me show you a couple chords. 387 00:13:41,188 --> 00:13:43,590 What'd you do? You replace the strings with razor wire 388 00:13:43,623 --> 00:13:45,758 so when I strum it, I slice off my fingertips? 389 00:13:45,792 --> 00:13:47,394 What would I want with your severed fingertips? 390 00:13:47,427 --> 00:13:50,297 You'd wear them to commit crimes, and then I'd get framed for it. 391 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,764 Well, nice try! 392 00:13:51,798 --> 00:13:54,467 I'm outta here! Aaron! 393 00:13:54,501 --> 00:13:55,768 (SIGHS) 394 00:13:55,802 --> 00:13:56,970 Hey, Aaron. 395 00:13:57,004 --> 00:13:59,339 I heard about that prank you played on Ms. Lewis. 396 00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:00,974 That was epic. Really? 397 00:14:01,008 --> 00:14:03,410 How'd you even dream up something like that fake deejay thing? 398 00:14:03,443 --> 00:14:05,078 I would have just wizzed in her beverage. 399 00:14:05,112 --> 00:14:07,247 I saw an opportunity, and like most things in life, 400 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:08,882 it's about timing and who you know. 401 00:14:10,117 --> 00:14:11,584 Totally. 402 00:14:11,618 --> 00:14:12,920 Well, listen, me and the guys are gonna head out 403 00:14:12,953 --> 00:14:14,354 to see that movie American Pie. 404 00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:16,789 You wanna come? Oh, my God! 405 00:14:16,823 --> 00:14:18,525 Me, go with you guys to a movie 406 00:14:18,558 --> 00:14:22,029 that's rated "R" for language and adult situations? 407 00:14:22,062 --> 00:14:23,063 I'm in! 408 00:14:26,566 --> 00:14:29,336 Actually, Ronnie, instead of going to the movie, 409 00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:31,138 why don't you go (BLEEP) yourself? 410 00:14:31,171 --> 00:14:32,639 Whoa! 411 00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:34,341 You're clearly in cahoots with Ms. Lewis. 412 00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:36,376 No idea what you're talking about, 413 00:14:36,409 --> 00:14:38,645 or what "cahoots" means. 414 00:14:38,678 --> 00:14:40,047 Whatever, weirdo. 415 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:42,049 Hey, you want to catch American Pie with us, nerd? 416 00:14:42,082 --> 00:14:44,651 See you 'round, Aaron. 417 00:14:44,684 --> 00:14:46,153 Wait. What? 418 00:14:47,187 --> 00:14:50,623 I blew my chance to hang with the seniors? 419 00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:52,859 I tried to tell you, there was no prank. 420 00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,094 So I pranked myself. 421 00:14:54,127 --> 00:14:57,197 And the most ingenious part, I never saw it coming. 422 00:14:57,230 --> 00:14:58,665 This is all your fault! 423 00:14:58,698 --> 00:15:00,167 You giving around your number 424 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:01,734 and trying to get in everybody's lives? 425 00:15:01,768 --> 00:15:03,070 What kind of teacher does that? 426 00:15:03,103 --> 00:15:04,671 It's too weird! 427 00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:07,140 I kept waiting for you to punish me, like a normal teacher. 428 00:15:07,174 --> 00:15:09,876 I don't wanna punish you. I want to help you. 429 00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:12,545 Well, if you wanna help me, just leave me alone. 430 00:15:18,618 --> 00:15:20,687 Okay. Wilma Howell has gone nuts this time. 431 00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:22,722 She's keeping her whole class after school 432 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,592 as some kind of a group punishment. Standing out there 433 00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:26,926 on the football field. Look at that. 434 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,561 I'm sure she has her reasons. 435 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,097 Maybe someone smacked their gum. 436 00:15:30,130 --> 00:15:32,599 In fairness, that is also a pet peeve of mine. 437 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:34,234 Well, your pet peeve better not die, 438 00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:35,935 or she'll make you dig it up and bring it to class. 439 00:15:35,969 --> 00:15:38,538 Okay, fine. I will go out and have a talk with her. 440 00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:41,274 I can always use another entry into my cloud journal. 441 00:15:41,308 --> 00:15:43,010 Oh, you have a cloud journal? 442 00:15:43,043 --> 00:15:45,378 GLASCOTT: Wilma, is there some good reason 443 00:15:45,412 --> 00:15:47,047 that you have your whole class out here? 444 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:48,448 (CHUCKLES) And trust me, no one enjoys 445 00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:52,019 pointlessly staring at the sky more than I do. 446 00:15:52,052 --> 00:15:53,886 Whoa! Look at that one, CB. 447 00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,423 It looks like Pat Sajak riding a dolphin. 448 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:58,225 We'll just be a little longer, John. 449 00:15:58,258 --> 00:15:59,892 Well, you have poor Debbie O'Donahue out here 450 00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:01,694 in the direct sunlight. 451 00:16:01,728 --> 00:16:04,797 That pale child will burn standing next to a light bulb. 452 00:16:04,831 --> 00:16:06,366 Yeah, hasn't Debra been through enough, 453 00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:08,035 after forcing her to exhume her parakeet? 454 00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:11,438 Look, I've been hearing some troubling things about your teaching methods. 455 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:13,040 Full disclosure, mostly from me. 456 00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:15,042 But also from credible sources. 457 00:16:15,075 --> 00:16:18,478 Actually, I was lying about my parakeet. 458 00:16:18,511 --> 00:16:20,480 What? Why did you lie? 459 00:16:20,513 --> 00:16:21,948 To get out of my assignment. 460 00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,983 Diane Para-keaton is very much alive. 461 00:16:24,017 --> 00:16:26,486 Well, we're happy for you and the bird 462 00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:28,888 but sad you felt you had to mislead us. 463 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:30,623 But Ms. Howell wasn't fooled. 464 00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:33,060 She saw right through me and called me on it. 465 00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:35,262 So I did my report, and I got a B-plus. 466 00:16:35,295 --> 00:16:36,996 You earned a B-plus. 467 00:16:37,030 --> 00:16:38,998 I am very sorry, Wilma. 468 00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:41,000 You were right and I was wrong about Debra. 469 00:16:41,034 --> 00:16:44,471 That said, I would hold 100 fake dead pet memorials 470 00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:47,940 if it meant truly being there for one grieving student. 471 00:16:47,974 --> 00:16:51,144 The service you held for my tetra fish was deeply moving. 472 00:16:51,178 --> 00:16:52,912 Well, you said he needed a Viking funeral, 473 00:16:52,945 --> 00:16:55,582 so we shot a bunch of tiny flaming arrows 474 00:16:55,615 --> 00:16:57,050 at an empty matchbox. 475 00:16:57,084 --> 00:16:59,586 No, Quentin Tetra-tino was really in there. 476 00:16:59,619 --> 00:17:01,354 He died from endocrine failure. 477 00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:03,123 (VOICE BREAKING) It was very painful. 478 00:17:03,156 --> 00:17:04,257 Oh, that's great! 479 00:17:04,291 --> 00:17:05,992 There you go, C.B., your one out of 100 480 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:07,627 that wasn't yanking your chain. 481 00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:09,496 Well, my takeaway here is that we have 482 00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:11,664 a lot of excellent teachers at William Penn 483 00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:13,766 with different approaches to teaching. 484 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,835 There's more than one way to skin a cat. 485 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:18,471 And if you stop by my class on Tuesday, you'll see two of them. 486 00:17:18,505 --> 00:17:21,141 Okay. Uh, one other question. 487 00:17:21,174 --> 00:17:23,443 Why do you have your whole class out here for punishment? 488 00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:25,445 Oh, it's not a punishment. It's a reward. 489 00:17:25,478 --> 00:17:27,380 This class has been doing exemplary work 490 00:17:27,414 --> 00:17:29,349 in our section on the monarch butterfly. 491 00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:30,983 Look! Coming from the trees! 492 00:17:31,017 --> 00:17:32,819 (STUDENTS GASP) 493 00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:34,387 C.B.: Oh, my God! 494 00:17:34,421 --> 00:17:35,555 That's amazing! 495 00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:36,989 It's so beautiful. 496 00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:40,093 I don't mind that it's covering up Pat Sajak. 497 00:17:42,195 --> 00:17:44,331 Hey, Rick, you seeing this? 498 00:17:44,364 --> 00:17:46,032 It's like a butterfly wonderland. 499 00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:49,536 Ah, the annual monarch migration down to Mexico. 500 00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:52,172 Your old stomping grounds, senor. 501 00:17:52,205 --> 00:17:55,074 Nope. I'm from Toronto. 502 00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:58,010 But it's a shame they're flying out of the sun like that. 503 00:17:58,044 --> 00:17:59,812 Makes it harder to see. 504 00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,148 Here. 505 00:18:01,181 --> 00:18:02,849 Try this. 506 00:18:02,882 --> 00:18:03,950 Oh. 507 00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:08,888 Much better. Thanks. 508 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,257 You've just been mentored. 509 00:18:10,290 --> 00:18:11,558 Welcome aboard. 510 00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:16,095 This is a transcendent moment. Thanks for sharing it, Wilma. 511 00:18:16,129 --> 00:18:17,530 WILMA: Seems like the kind of occasion 512 00:18:17,564 --> 00:18:20,233 where some artsy type might want to recite a poem. 513 00:18:20,267 --> 00:18:22,202 (CLEARS THROAT) 514 00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:24,571 (RECITING) Come, my lady. Come, come, my lady. 515 00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:26,939 You're my butterfly. Sugar. Baby. 516 00:18:26,973 --> 00:18:29,676 Come, my lady. You're my pretty baby. 517 00:18:29,709 --> 00:18:31,043 You're my butterfly... 518 00:18:31,077 --> 00:18:33,012 Uh, okay. Maybe we should wrap this up. 519 00:18:33,045 --> 00:18:34,914 One more minute. You don't want to miss the best part. 520 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:36,416 The best part? How can it get any better than... 521 00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:37,550 The crows! 522 00:18:37,584 --> 00:18:38,685 (CROWS CAWING) Good Lord! 523 00:18:38,718 --> 00:18:40,086 They're eating the butterflies! 524 00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:41,221 Awesome! 525 00:18:41,254 --> 00:18:43,956 I'm really starting to come around on these kids. 526 00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:45,992 You got a nice school here, John. 527 00:18:46,025 --> 00:18:47,360 (MOBILE PHONE RINGS) 528 00:18:47,394 --> 00:18:48,928 (MOBILE PHONE BEEPS) Barry? 529 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,030 AARON: Ms. Lewis? I-It's Aaron Rubin. 530 00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:52,699 Aaron? What's going on? 531 00:18:52,732 --> 00:18:54,301 Did I win another contest? 532 00:18:54,334 --> 00:18:56,769 No. I'm in trouble. What kind of trouble? 533 00:18:56,803 --> 00:18:59,439 I got caught sneaking in to see "American Pie." 534 00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:00,973 And you called me? 535 00:19:01,007 --> 00:19:02,809 My mom and dad would kill me! 536 00:19:02,842 --> 00:19:05,712 In fact, you're the only adult I could think of to call. 537 00:19:05,745 --> 00:19:07,780 You just want to help me, right? More than anything. 538 00:19:07,814 --> 00:19:09,282 Hang tight. I'll be right there. (MOBILE PHONE BEEPS) 539 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:13,986 I know what you're going to say, Rick. I'm making a mistake, 540 00:19:14,020 --> 00:19:15,555 and I'm going to end up that kid's butler, 541 00:19:15,588 --> 00:19:16,623 but I don't care. 542 00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,558 Aaron reached out, and I'm going to be there for him. 543 00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:20,393 So prepare that Beef Wellington recipe. 544 00:19:20,427 --> 00:19:21,994 Actually, I'm impressed, Lewis. 545 00:19:22,028 --> 00:19:24,264 24 hours ago, that kid set out to humiliate you, 546 00:19:24,297 --> 00:19:26,266 and he did so in spectacular fashion. 547 00:19:26,299 --> 00:19:27,334 Well, that's in the past. 548 00:19:27,367 --> 00:19:28,635 Everybody's still talking about it. 549 00:19:28,668 --> 00:19:31,170 But you handled it your way. 550 00:19:31,204 --> 00:19:32,639 And now Aaron is coming to you 551 00:19:32,672 --> 00:19:34,474 as the person he trusts the most. 552 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,075 That's huge. You think? 553 00:19:36,108 --> 00:19:37,344 Look, I put a lot of work 554 00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:39,145 into maintaining the godlike status 555 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:40,613 I have with these students, 556 00:19:40,647 --> 00:19:42,215 but it comes at a price. 557 00:19:42,249 --> 00:19:44,217 I don't connect to them the way you do. 558 00:19:45,385 --> 00:19:47,620 Maybe the second-year teacher can teach me something. 559 00:19:47,654 --> 00:19:49,356 Well, I had an excellent mentor. 560 00:19:49,389 --> 00:19:51,190 That's nice, but you can't come back. 561 00:19:51,224 --> 00:19:52,659 Coop already took your place. 562 00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:54,294 (CHUCKLES LIGHTLY) (CRAZY TOWN'S BUTTERFLY PLAYING) 563 00:19:54,327 --> 00:19:55,528 (RAPPING) * Come, my lady * 564 00:19:55,562 --> 00:19:57,664 LAINEY: It was a whole new year at William Penn. 565 00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:59,432 Was I as cool as Michelle Pfeiffer? 566 00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:00,700 No. 567 00:20:00,733 --> 00:20:02,502 Was I the teacher I wanted to be yet? 568 00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,371 No. But I was on my way. 569 00:20:04,404 --> 00:20:05,772 * You're my pretty baby * 570 00:20:05,805 --> 00:20:08,475 * I'll make your legs shake, you make me go crazy * 571 00:20:08,508 --> 00:20:09,776 * Come, my lady, come, come, my lady * 572 00:20:09,809 --> 00:20:12,379 LAINEY: And I had a lot of wonderful teachers around 573 00:20:12,412 --> 00:20:13,880 to act as role models, 574 00:20:13,913 --> 00:20:16,883 each of us with our own way of doing things. 575 00:20:16,916 --> 00:20:19,051 But we all had the same goal... 576 00:20:20,086 --> 00:20:22,722 ...being there when the kids needed us most. 577 00:20:25,992 --> 00:20:27,994 GLASCOTT: The great thing about cloud journaling 578 00:20:28,027 --> 00:20:31,731 is that every interpretation is valid. 579 00:20:31,764 --> 00:20:34,033 That one kind of looks like a manatee. 580 00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,503 Nope. You're wrong. You're way off. 581 00:20:36,536 --> 00:20:38,671 That's clearly Bob Barker putting on a sock. 582 00:20:38,705 --> 00:20:41,173 I notice you tend to see a lot of game-show hosts. 583 00:20:41,207 --> 00:20:43,843 That's not the Bob Barker who hosts some tacky game show. 584 00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:46,279 That's the Bob Barker who tirelessly advocates 585 00:20:46,313 --> 00:20:48,348 spaying and neutering your pets. 586 00:20:48,381 --> 00:20:50,182 (CHUCKLING) Hey, look, a butterfly. 587 00:20:50,216 --> 00:20:51,551 GLASCOTT: Wrong again. 588 00:20:51,584 --> 00:20:52,852 You're not good at this. 589 00:20:52,885 --> 00:20:54,220 No, over there. You see? 590 00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,389 It's an actual monarch butterfly. 591 00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:58,425 Aw. Sweet little guy. 592 00:20:58,458 --> 00:21:01,060 He's on his way to meet his friends on their journey to Mexico. 593 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:02,495 Vaya con dios, amigo! 594 00:21:02,529 --> 00:21:03,596 (CROW CAWING) 595 00:21:03,630 --> 00:21:05,064 Uh-oh! Crow! 596 00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:07,767 Fly away, little buddy! Use some evasive maneuvers! 597 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,569 Do a loopty-loop! (CAWING CONTINUES) 598 00:21:09,602 --> 00:21:10,737 Ohh. Do... 599 00:21:10,770 --> 00:21:12,672 Ohh! 600 00:21:12,705 --> 00:21:14,974 He neither looptied nor looped. 601 00:21:15,007 --> 00:21:17,243 Okay, I-I'm... I'm done. 602 00:21:17,276 --> 00:21:18,945 I'm done. I'm done. 603 00:21:18,978 --> 00:21:20,880 (GRUNTS) 604 00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:22,014 Oh, look! 605 00:21:22,048 --> 00:21:25,418 That one looks like Alex Trebek on a snowmobile!