1 00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:24,520 So, boys, tell me, why do you want to adopt? 2 00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:28,900 Well, we've, uh, we've been talking about it 3 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:30,980 for a while now, haven't we, Gabe? 4 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:32,500 Mm-hm. 5 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,260 And we're really solid. 6 00:00:34,360 --> 00:00:36,860 Been together, oh, eight years now, 7 00:00:36,960 --> 00:00:40,020 so it feels like the natural next step, doesn't it? 8 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,060 Hmm. 9 00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:44,860 I'm sensing you're a little bit nervous, Gabriel. 10 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:46,180 I'm not nervous. 11 00:00:46,280 --> 00:00:50,660 Good, just answer honestly, and we'll all get along fine. 12 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:52,940 Are you married? 13 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:54,100 Uh, no, no. 14 00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:55,740 Not that it's a problem. 15 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:59,000 Gabriel thinks it's heteronormative. 16 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:02,420 He thinks it's what straight couples do 17 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:04,300 when they've run outta things to say. 18 00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:11,820 Will you take paternity leave then, or? 19 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:13,540 Uh, we're gonna split it. 20 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:15,820 So I'm gonna take nine months, and Gabe is gonna take 21 00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:17,420 one. - Three. 22 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:19,820 I thought you were just taking the one. 23 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:21,920 No, three. 24 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:27,180 And we want a girl, don't we, And? 25 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:29,020 Why's that? 26 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,720 Boys are nothing but trouble. 27 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:34,740 I was told we could be specific. 28 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:36,980 But you're halving your chances there. 29 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:40,260 I mean, I'd encourage you to keep your options open. 30 00:01:40,360 --> 00:01:44,720 We'd really like a girl, though, wouldn't we, And? 31 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:47,620 Now, what do you do, Andy? 32 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:49,180 Oh, I'm an accountant. 33 00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:50,660 Well, it's nothing to be ashamed of. 34 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:53,460 Well, it's certainly not as exciting as Gabe. 35 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:56,220 Yes, I hear you're a drag queen. 36 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:57,660 I'm not a drag queen. 37 00:01:57,760 --> 00:01:58,900 What are you then? 38 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:02,380 He's wonderful. People come from miles to see him. 39 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:05,220 Oh, you should hear him sing at Neverland. 40 00:02:05,320 --> 00:02:07,320 Done. 41 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:11,340 Do you mind if I have a quick look around the house? 42 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:13,700 I just wanna check you're not serial killers or something. 43 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:21,780 What? 44 00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:24,540 Why did you invite her to Neverland? 45 00:02:24,640 --> 00:02:27,220 She might be into muff. 46 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:30,100 I wouldn't like to say. We've only just met. 47 00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:33,060 First rule of parenting, watch what you say. 48 00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:35,760 You never know who's listening. 49 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:49,420 ♪ You probably think I'll miss you ♪ 50 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:52,620 ♪ But I won't ♪ 51 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:56,940 ♪ You probably think I hide my hurt inside ♪ 52 00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:58,900 ♪ But I don't ♪ 53 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:01,900 ♪ So many people come and go ♪ 54 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,980 ♪ I find it best ♪ 55 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:07,780 ♪ To let them go ♪ 56 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:10,740 ♪ As soon as they're gone ♪ 57 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:16,880 ♪ Remembering's only there to make you sad ♪ 58 00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:20,340 ♪ They say it hurts your insides ♪ 59 00:03:20,440 --> 00:03:23,660 ♪ When you miss the things you've had ♪ 60 00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:28,760 ♪ Well, I don't cry 'cause I've no love inside of me ♪ 61 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:31,300 ♪ I'm footloose ♪ 62 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:35,820 ♪ No memories to tie me down, I'm free ♪ 63 00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:40,580 ♪ But sometimes I wonder ♪ 64 00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:45,620 ♪ What happened to those with whom I shared adventures ♪ 65 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:48,740 ♪ Those pirates ♪ 66 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:53,840 ♪ And lost boys and fairies ♪ 67 00:03:55,920 --> 00:04:00,740 ♪ And sometimes those wonderings ♪ 68 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:05,180 ♪ They give me the strangest of feelings ♪ 69 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:09,540 ♪ Fleeting moments in my mind ♪ 70 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:14,640 ♪ Of those once upon a times long ago ♪ 71 00:04:16,640 --> 00:04:20,660 ♪ Oh, where ♪ 72 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:25,760 ♪ Did all the lost boys go ♪ 73 00:04:29,280 --> 00:04:32,920 ♪ Somewhere I'll never know ♪ 74 00:04:44,440 --> 00:04:47,420 ♪ Those pirates ♪ 75 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:51,200 ♪ And lost boys and fairies ♪ 76 00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:03,480 ♪ Where are we ♪ 77 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:19,540 You may need stair gates, 78 00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:22,920 depending on their age, top and bottom. 79 00:05:23,920 --> 00:05:25,920 Is that you? 80 00:05:26,400 --> 00:05:27,500 Mm-hmm. 81 00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:31,900 Oh, I see what you mean. You're a work of art. 82 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:35,180 This one's got better tits than I have. 83 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:38,640 I'm a social worker, boys, not a priest. 84 00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:44,040 Oh, wow. 85 00:05:45,360 --> 00:05:47,580 It's where the magic happens. 86 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,780 Then put a lock on it, 87 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:51,420 or your magic'll soon be covered in snot. 88 00:05:51,520 --> 00:05:53,880 And you'll need a lock here. 89 00:05:56,040 --> 00:05:57,420 And here. 90 00:05:57,520 --> 00:05:59,500 And that'll have to go, won't it? 91 00:06:01,440 --> 00:06:03,460 And what about your health? 92 00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:06,080 Your finances? Your childhood? 93 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:09,140 My childhood? 94 00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:11,180 Yes, the way you were parented 95 00:06:11,280 --> 00:06:12,500 can have a significant impact 96 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:14,540 on the parent you're likely to become. 97 00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:16,060 Oh, but I'll do things very differently. 98 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,400 That's what they all say! 99 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:24,020 Look, children can push buttons you never even knew you had. 100 00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:26,980 But I had a very happy childhood. 101 00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:28,540 Mum and Dad moved to be closer to Cardiff 102 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:29,940 just after I was born. 103 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,100 Tell me about your parents. 104 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:36,700 Dad was a physics teacher. Mum worked at a nursery. 105 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,900 Welsh language schools? 106 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:41,000 Uh, yes. 107 00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:43,300 Mum was loving. 108 00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:49,460 Nurturing. 109 00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:52,380 ♪ Your Rolling Stones records ♪ 110 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:55,020 ♪ And a friend of Sacha Distel ♪ 111 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:55,940 Dad was... 112 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:02,620 Well, there was a lot of capel, chapel. 113 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:11,740 Dad is a deacon. 114 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:14,080 His dad was a minister, so. 115 00:07:16,760 --> 00:07:18,620 My mum helped out with Sunday school until- 116 00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:03,380 She died when I was little, a brain haemorrhage. 117 00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:06,880 Oh, Gabriel, I'm so sorry to hear that. 118 00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,940 That's fine. It was a long time ago. 119 00:08:11,040 --> 00:08:11,800 Well, it must've been 120 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:15,180 incredibly traumatic for you as a child. 121 00:08:15,280 --> 00:08:17,540 No, no, oh, no, no! 122 00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:21,500 No, no, no, no, no! 123 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:25,840 I don't remember much about it now, to be honest. 124 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:30,940 Will you raise your child to speak Welsh as well? 125 00:08:31,040 --> 00:08:34,720 No. It wouldn't be fair on Andy, would it? 126 00:08:36,360 --> 00:08:39,340 Why not? I'm thinking of having lessons, actually. 127 00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:41,020 But don't you think it's like therapy 128 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,380 but without the actual therapy? 129 00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:45,300 I'm not the one who has a problem with it. 130 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:46,300 The way she looks at you 131 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:49,380 with those Judgey McJudge-Judge eyes. 132 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:52,060 I mean, does it need to be so intrusive? 133 00:08:52,160 --> 00:08:53,820 Why does she need to know everything? 134 00:08:53,920 --> 00:08:57,140 Any asshole can shoot their load and make a baby. 135 00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:00,980 Exactly, hence the need for adoption. 136 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:04,260 And why, she has to make sure we're not gonna, you know, 137 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:08,100 further damage an already traumatised child. 138 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:15,080 You haven't mentioned... 139 00:09:16,560 --> 00:09:18,380 What do you take me for? 140 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,380 I know what you're like. You overshare. 141 00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:25,900 Plus she told us not to lie, and you hate lying, so. 142 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:28,600 Yes, but I'm not lying, am I? 143 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:32,680 Just being frugal with the truth. 144 00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:37,080 Aren't you finding it intense? 145 00:09:38,080 --> 00:09:40,060 - Honestly, Jackie, it's true 146 00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:42,580 that apart from wanting to get as far away from my dad 147 00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:45,300 as possible, I swear the only reason she chose Cardiff 148 00:09:45,400 --> 00:09:46,820 was because she was hoping she'd make friends 149 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:48,220 with Shirley Bassey! 150 00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:55,780 Uh, we didn't have a lot, but, um, I didn't want for love. 151 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:59,900 So now I wanna be able to pass that on to someone, 152 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:03,900 um, help them thrive, make a difference. 153 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:06,220 Did your mum ever befriend Shirley? 154 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:09,620 Yeah, she tried. Nearly got arrested. 155 00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:18,620 Yeah, yeah, it is quite intense, isn't it? 156 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:30,140 So tell me about your hobbies when you were little. 157 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:31,580 Children who need to be taught 158 00:10:31,680 --> 00:10:34,380 to respect traditional moral values 159 00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:35,500 are being taught- - I liked reading. 160 00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:38,940 that they have an inalienable right to be gay. 161 00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:41,500 All of those children are being cheated 162 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,680 of a sound start in life. 163 00:10:44,760 --> 00:10:47,840 And dressing up, loved dressing up. 164 00:11:36,360 --> 00:11:38,940 Come on now, boy. 165 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:55,260 To make sure it's all done in the best possible gay. 166 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:57,380 Gabriel? 167 00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:03,240 Gabriel. 168 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:18,240 Uh! Oh, oh! 169 00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:24,140 Pretty good, I'd say. it was just him and me, so. 170 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:34,300 The music was my happy place. 171 00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:42,540 And how does your dad feel about the adoption? 172 00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:44,060 Is he excited? 173 00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,940 We haven't actually told him yet. 174 00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:50,460 We wanted to tell him face to face. 175 00:12:50,560 --> 00:12:52,420 I'm sure he'll be delighted, yeah. 176 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:55,520 Hmm, so next session we'll move on 177 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:58,620 to when did you have your first inkling 178 00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:00,720 that you might be gay? 179 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:05,260 Well, there's never one moment, Jackie. 180 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:07,440 More a series of moments. 181 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:12,700 ♪ All I do each night is pray ♪ 182 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:17,140 ♪ Hoping that I'll be a part of you again someday ♪ 183 00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:21,820 ♪ All I do each night is think ♪ 184 00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:26,420 ♪ Of all the times I closed the door to keep my love within ♪ 185 00:13:26,520 --> 00:13:27,980 ♪ All I do each night ♪ 186 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,340 ♪ Is pray ♪ ♪ Come on ♪ 187 00:13:29,440 --> 00:13:30,580 ♪ Time is runnin' out ♪ 188 00:13:30,680 --> 00:13:32,620 Crack your door. 189 00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:34,780 ♪ Hoping that I'll be a part of you again someday ♪ 190 00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:39,220 ♪ You and me, on my knees ♪ 191 00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:41,900 ♪ You and me ♪ 192 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:48,780 Did you struggle with it? 193 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:54,780 No, not really. 194 00:14:54,880 --> 00:14:56,860 How about your dad? 195 00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:59,780 He struggled with it a bit, I guess. 196 00:14:59,880 --> 00:15:02,660 But no one's out in the Bible, are they? 197 00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:05,960 Being a teenager's horrific, isn't it? 198 00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:08,780 It's just a confusing time. 199 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:11,220 I mean, I didn't know if I wanted to kill the boys 200 00:15:11,320 --> 00:15:16,320 who picked on me or fuck them instead. 201 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:21,320 I got, um, sorry, forgot where I was for a moment. 202 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:23,900 Were you bullied, Gabriel? 203 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,900 God, no, nothing like that. I was never bullied. 204 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:28,100 Just the usual stuff. 205 00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:53,100 I mean, I'm actually grateful for it. 206 00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:55,200 Made me who I am today. 207 00:15:56,920 --> 00:15:59,220 Being an outsider gave me an advantage 208 00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:02,740 because all that time I threw into music. 209 00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:08,420 I loved the attention. 210 00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:58,780 And your dad must've been so proud. 211 00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:02,240 I think so. He's not much of a talker. 212 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:05,080 Would you like to teach your child 213 00:17:05,080 --> 00:17:06,140 to play the piano? 214 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:07,460 I don't play now. 215 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:08,380 Don't you? 216 00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,980 I left music college at the end of the first year, so. 217 00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:12,900 Left. 218 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:17,300 Yeah, I just found it a bit constraining, you know? 219 00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:25,660 I lost a few years to temping. 220 00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:35,060 Until Berwyn opened Neverland, 221 00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:37,700 and I decided to come back to Cardiff. 222 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:39,860 ♪ All of the people start to rush ♪ 223 00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,740 ♪ Start to rush by ♪ 224 00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:45,620 ♪ A dizzy twister dance, can't find my drink or man ♪ 225 00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:46,780 ♪ Where are my keys ♪ 226 00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:49,700 ♪ I lost my phone, phone ♪ 227 00:17:49,800 --> 00:17:54,500 ♪ What's goin' on out on the floor ♪ 228 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:55,740 ♪ I love this record ♪ 229 00:17:55,840 --> 00:17:57,260 And that's where I met- 230 00:17:57,360 --> 00:17:58,660 Andy. 231 00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:01,340 ♪ Light fantastic, and it won't be long ♪ 232 00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:05,220 Would you, would you mind if I kissed you? 233 00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:08,740 ♪ 'Cause you and I could find pleasure ♪ 234 00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:10,380 I'm sorry, I, I shouldn't have said anything. 235 00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:12,100 No, no, it's fine. 236 00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:16,520 It's just, no one's ever asked my permission before. 237 00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:22,960 ♪ Don't wanna be alone ♪ 238 00:18:23,360 --> 00:18:28,360 ♪ How does it feel in my arms ♪ 239 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:32,860 ♪ How does it feel in my arms ♪ 240 00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:36,560 I often say that that kiss saved my life. 241 00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:40,520 Not that it needed saving. 242 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:47,000 Can I ask you personally, Gabriel, why you want to adopt? 243 00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:48,980 Honestly? 244 00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:52,100 Yeah, yeah, no, much better to be 245 00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:54,340 completely honest in the long run. 246 00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:56,440 Okay. 247 00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:00,880 I wanna adopt because, because, 248 00:19:03,800 --> 00:19:08,220 because I see all these young people having fun 249 00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:11,380 like I used to, and I can't do it anymore, 250 00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,220 because I'm utterly bored with the mundanity of life, 251 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,180 the cycle of work and countless late nights, 252 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:17,340 because all the men my age in the park 253 00:19:17,440 --> 00:19:19,100 seem to have children now, 254 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,620 because I love Andy so much, 255 00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:22,060 and I know it'll make him happy. 256 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:23,660 But more than that, I want to adopt 257 00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:26,060 because I think it'll make me a much kinder, 258 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:28,060 tolerant, patient person. 259 00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:29,300 I'll become less angry and bitter, 260 00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:30,660 and I'll have no choice but to grow up 261 00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:32,060 and care for someone other than myself, 262 00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:33,380 and so I'll finally have to remove my head 263 00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:34,980 out of my damaged, promiscuous, 264 00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:38,340 yet still perfectly agreeable asshole. 265 00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:39,940 You didn't say that. 266 00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:41,940 Well, of course I didn't. 267 00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:43,940 I just said, I honestly think Andy and I have a lot 268 00:19:44,040 --> 00:19:46,040 we can offer as parents. 269 00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:53,980 Okay, um, risk of special needs 270 00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:55,300 as a result of parental- 271 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:56,860 Won't accept. 272 00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:58,020 Harsh! 273 00:19:58,120 --> 00:19:59,500 We both work! 274 00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:01,860 So? Shouldn't we at least be open to it? 275 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:03,020 Every case is different. 276 00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:04,900 We wouldn't have the capacity, and you know it. 277 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:06,660 Jackie said dealing with the trauma will be hard enough. 278 00:20:06,760 --> 00:20:09,920 All right, all right. Down syndrome. 279 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:11,980 Wouldn't accept. 280 00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:13,900 This is horrible! Can't we at least- 281 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:15,740 Zip it, Saint Andrew. 282 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,860 But what would Mother Teresa do? 283 00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,960 Nothing! She's dead. 284 00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:25,980 Pregnant people get scanned for anomalies all the time. 285 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:29,560 Okay, well, what about AIDS or HIV then? 286 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:33,860 At first, only gays and IV drug users 287 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:37,780 were being killed by AIDS, but in three years, 288 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,980 nearly 2,000 of us will be dead. 289 00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:45,860 Wouldn't accept. 290 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,300 Are you kidding me? 291 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:48,700 It'll complicate things! 292 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:49,980 It's not complicated. 293 00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:52,260 It's still a complication, though. 294 00:20:52,360 --> 00:20:53,540 Try saying that to Berwyn. 295 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:55,900 I'm sure Berwyn would agree. 296 00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:07,940 Well, it's great to know you're open 297 00:21:08,040 --> 00:21:09,700 to discussing most things, 298 00:21:09,800 --> 00:21:11,900 um, though I would like to chat through your resistance 299 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,400 to meeting the birth parents. 300 00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:16,940 Uh, I was open to it. 301 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:18,420 Well, they're hardly gonna be civil 302 00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:19,820 if their kids have been taken off them. 303 00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:22,660 Don't assume anything, Gabe. 304 00:21:22,760 --> 00:21:24,060 Just keep an open mind. 305 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:25,980 See, you'd be able to give your child 306 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:28,780 a fuller picture of birth mum or dad, 307 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:32,820 and most adopters find it a really positive experience. 308 00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:36,620 And we all deserve a second chance, don't we? 309 00:21:36,720 --> 00:21:40,640 Why don't I say that you're open to it for now. 310 00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:42,620 Okay. 311 00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:46,860 I've got a few questions about your support network. 312 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:48,660 And in terms of family, 313 00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:50,900 you've only put Andy's mum down so far. 314 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:52,220 Won't she do? 315 00:21:52,320 --> 00:21:53,860 Especially 'cause I sometimes think 316 00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:56,940 she prefers Gabe to me. 317 00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,300 Gabe's just wonderful, isn't he? 318 00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:02,580 He's brought so much colour to Andy's life, and so sensible. 319 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:03,940 You know, he had to grow up fast. 320 00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:07,180 But Gabe, he brings all the sparkle. 321 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,180 Did he tell you studied at a Royal College? 322 00:22:09,280 --> 00:22:11,820 Not just any old college, a royal one. 323 00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:13,620 Not that he met Charles or anything, 324 00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:16,720 but always nice to know he approves. 325 00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:20,660 But it would help your case to put your dad down, too. 326 00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:24,280 Otherwise, they may wonder why you didn't. 327 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,660 I'm phoning with some good news, actually. 328 00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:32,780 Andy's here with me, but hang on. 329 00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:34,020 I can put you on loudspeaker. 330 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,760 We're going to adopt. 331 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,080 We're gonna be parents. 332 00:22:59,880 --> 00:23:01,880 Dad. 333 00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:14,760 But of course we thought about this. 334 00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:31,460 We just need to educate him, 335 00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:33,340 you know, to hold his hand. 336 00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:35,300 Gabe had loads of nature/nurture anxieties 337 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:36,540 at the beginning, too. 338 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:38,100 No, I didn't. 339 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:40,900 You kept talking about "The Omen." 340 00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:42,980 Fears are perfectly normal. 341 00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:45,980 We run workshops for relatives which are really effective 342 00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:47,980 at putting people's minds at rest. 343 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:51,380 There's some amazing books out there, too. 344 00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:53,180 Sorry, but it's gonna take a lot more 345 00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:54,620 than a book and a workshop. 346 00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:57,020 You just need to talk to him again. It'll be fine! 347 00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:58,900 No, Andy, it won't be fine because 348 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:02,620 he doesn't think that gay men deserve to be parents. 349 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:04,580 Has he actually said that? 350 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:06,980 He doesn't need to! 351 00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:09,380 I honestly don't think it's the gay thing. 352 00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,300 It's the adoption thing. 353 00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,820 I mean perhaps, Gabriel, you're projecting your anxieties 354 00:24:13,920 --> 00:24:17,100 onto your father because that's what you grew up believing. 355 00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:20,580 Nonsense! I don't believe that. 356 00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:22,680 It's Dad, not me. 357 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,340 Of course I deserve to have children. 358 00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:27,140 In fact, I deserve them far more than he ever did 359 00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,620 because mine aren't gonna grow up half as screwed up 360 00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:31,700 as I did because I will make damn sure they know 361 00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:33,780 whoever they are and whatever they become 362 00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:38,160 that they have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. 363 00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:42,880 Okay. 364 00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:51,120 Gabriel, there's something you are not telling me. 365 00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:54,500 - Only gays were affected 366 00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:55,520 by AIDS. - A local authority shall not 367 00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,860 promote the teaching in any maintained school. 368 00:24:57,960 --> 00:24:58,940 - Stop it! - The acceptability 369 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:00,780 of homosexuality- - Have an inalienable right 370 00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:01,580 - to be gay. - Pretended 371 00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:03,340 family relationship. 372 00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:18,520 Gabe, is there anything I should know? 373 00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:28,260 What the hell did you go and tell her all of that for? 374 00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:30,740 The last time was years ago. 375 00:25:48,520 --> 00:25:51,980 We dealt with it! You sorted it out. 376 00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:54,780 You know what your boundaries are, right? 377 00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:56,960 You, you never get drunk. 378 00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:02,300 You never touch white wine or Prosecco. 379 00:26:02,400 --> 00:26:04,580 There's no problem anymore. 380 00:26:07,280 --> 00:26:12,040 Exactly, so it doesn't matter that I told her, does it? 381 00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:15,420 Grow up, Gabriel. Of course it matters! 382 00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:17,220 The only reason kids get adopted nowadays 383 00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:20,860 is because their parents are too fucked to look after them. 384 00:26:20,960 --> 00:26:24,300 So why on earth should social services trust us with one 385 00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:27,180 when you used to get just as fucked as up as well. 386 00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:32,100 Sorry. 387 00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:36,360 You're right, aren't you? What's the difference? 388 00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:41,780 But you came through it in the end. 389 00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:46,780 Only because you could afford to pay for my therapy. 390 00:26:46,880 --> 00:26:49,120 Hardly seems fair, does it? 391 00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:57,280 Do you even want to adopt? 392 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:02,000 Because if you don't, then... 393 00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:14,560 Of course I want to adopt. 'Course I do. 394 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:23,680 I've gone and fucked everything up again, haven't I? 395 00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:32,540 Not necessarily. 396 00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:34,700 I talked to my manager, and we both agree 397 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:37,420 the fact that you've been honest goes in your favour. 398 00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:38,980 I mean, I actually think that people 399 00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:40,420 who've conquered their addictions 400 00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:43,100 can make excellent adopters because they know what it is 401 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:45,200 to live through trauma. 402 00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:48,100 Look, I don't want us to get ahead of ourselves, 403 00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:49,820 'cause it will depend on panel 404 00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:51,780 and depend on the child's social worker, 405 00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:54,620 and not everyone's gonna necessarily think the way I do. 406 00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,620 But it's, so, it's, it's not game over? 407 00:27:57,720 --> 00:27:59,300 I wouldn't carry on if I didn't think 408 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:02,380 I could get you both through this. 409 00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:05,020 I spoke to your therapist this morning, and she said- 410 00:28:05,120 --> 00:28:06,820 Most gay men his generation 411 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,900 are still dealing with the effects of decades of shame. 412 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:11,980 But Gabriel's developed several strategies 413 00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:13,740 to manage his compulsions, 414 00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:15,740 and in my professional view, 415 00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:18,460 I think he'd make an excellent parent. 416 00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:20,740 He never even gets drunk anymore. 417 00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:22,140 Two's the magic number. 418 00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:24,100 Oh, you and me both, love. 419 00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:27,180 Look, I have no doubt you've got so much 420 00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:30,460 you can offer a child, Gabe, both of you. 421 00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:34,660 So I think we should just proceed as normal, 422 00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:36,760 if that's what you want. 423 00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:43,060 Try stopping him. 424 00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:48,060 Sorry, he's such a poof. 425 00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:52,340 Oh, god, I'm late for court. 426 00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:55,180 Don't worry, I shall see myself out, 427 00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:56,620 and I'll give you a ring in the week. 428 00:28:56,720 --> 00:29:01,200 There's, um, an activity day I think you should go to. 429 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,220 Uh, what? 430 00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:07,860 An activity what? 431 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:10,460 Activity day, where you get to meet children 432 00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:12,460 waiting to be adopted. 433 00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:14,700 Well, like kiddie speed dating. 434 00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,100 Gabe, please don't let the other social workers 435 00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:18,420 hear you call it that. 436 00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:19,740 But we haven't been approved yet. 437 00:29:19,840 --> 00:29:21,300 It'll be after approval, 438 00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:22,860 and I know you'll be sensible, 439 00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:25,300 and you won't be seduced by superficial factors. 440 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:27,220 Superficial factors? 441 00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:29,260 How cute they are. 442 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:31,420 But do they know that's why they're there? 443 00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:32,940 The older ones will. 444 00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:34,820 God, that's awful, isn't it? 445 00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,540 I wasn't sure about it myself at first, 446 00:29:36,640 --> 00:29:38,900 but they've placed over a thousand children 447 00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:40,540 through them, so. 448 00:29:40,640 --> 00:29:43,720 At least consider it. I'll phone you. 449 00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:47,380 Speak to your dad! 450 00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:19,100 And I know you don't think it's a good idea, 451 00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:22,820 but our social worker says that it could really help. 452 00:30:25,600 --> 00:30:27,100 The way you're behaving, 453 00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:28,300 I thought you were gonna tell me 454 00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:31,160 that you had cancer or something. 455 00:30:38,640 --> 00:30:40,640 Please, Dad. 456 00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:45,700 What do you take me for? 457 00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:48,300 I'm hardly gonna say no, am I? 458 00:30:53,320 --> 00:30:56,100 It's nice to be asked, actually. 459 00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,200 Thank you, Emrys. 460 00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:04,360 But, uh, parenting isn't easy, you know. 461 00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:09,260 I know that. 462 00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:11,620 And you could end up with anything. 463 00:31:11,720 --> 00:31:12,820 Thing? 464 00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:17,680 Oh, you, you know what I mean. 465 00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:21,400 Will they speak Welsh? 466 00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:24,780 Would that make them more acceptable to you if they did? 467 00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:26,840 Gabriel. - Well, there's obviously 468 00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:28,920 a problem. 469 00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:31,400 Well, you, we just... 470 00:31:32,960 --> 00:31:35,020 What, Dad? 471 00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:39,120 I just think a child needs mother, that's all. 472 00:31:44,000 --> 00:31:46,000 No, Emrys. 473 00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:53,140 Look, I know how tough it must've been for you without Non, 474 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,080 but a child doesn't need a mother. 475 00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:01,000 A child needs love. 476 00:32:19,280 --> 00:32:22,860 ♪ I don't eat, I don't sleep ♪ 477 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:28,100 ♪ I do nothing but think of you ♪ 478 00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:32,100 ♪ I don't eat, I don't sleep ♪ 479 00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:37,260 ♪ I do nothing but think of you ♪ 480 00:32:37,360 --> 00:32:39,500 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 481 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:41,740 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 482 00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:46,380 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 483 00:32:46,480 --> 00:32:48,420 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 484 00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:50,900 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 485 00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,900 ♪ You keep me under your spell ♪ 486 00:33:05,880 --> 00:33:07,880 Oh, my god. 487 00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:12,040 We're gonna be parents. 488 00:33:24,400 --> 00:33:26,220 I feel like a dick. 489 00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:29,700 You look great. All the kids love Superman. 490 00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:32,700 Supergirl, actually, Jackie. 491 00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:34,500 Was that heteronormative of me? 492 00:33:34,600 --> 00:33:38,840 Ignore him. He's always a twat when he's nervous. 493 00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:45,180 What's wrong with them? 494 00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:47,500 Sizing up the competition, aren't they? 495 00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:50,680 I imagine we pose a veritable threat. 496 00:33:57,920 --> 00:33:59,380 Shit! 497 00:33:59,480 --> 00:34:01,420 Scundered! 498 00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:06,380 Come on, we're late! 499 00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:08,620 I don't think we are. 500 00:34:08,720 --> 00:34:09,620 What? 501 00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:26,140 But it's cheating. The theme's superheroes. 502 00:34:26,240 --> 00:34:27,500 Prince Charming's not a superhero. 503 00:34:27,600 --> 00:34:29,620 Fairy Godmother's not a superhero. 504 00:34:29,720 --> 00:34:31,100 They should be disqualified. 505 00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:32,700 It's not a competition. 506 00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:36,100 Of course it's a fucking competition. 507 00:34:39,080 --> 00:34:40,540 Hello, everybody. 508 00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:42,640 - Hello. - Oh, hello. 509 00:34:44,240 --> 00:34:46,820 Now, I'm sure you're all feeling 510 00:34:46,920 --> 00:34:49,780 a mixture of excitement and nerves, 511 00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:52,620 maybe a little anxious, and that's okay. 512 00:34:52,720 --> 00:34:53,480 Why the hell are we so horny 513 00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:54,360 at moment? - We know what an emotive day 514 00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:55,260 this can be for people. 515 00:34:55,360 --> 00:34:57,460 Because our bodies think we want to procreate? 516 00:34:57,560 --> 00:34:58,380 Now in these brochures, 517 00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:00,700 you'll find all the children's details. 518 00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:02,980 Of course, you'll have your own matching criteria, 519 00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:06,140 and we know that people tend to zone in on their favourites. 520 00:35:06,240 --> 00:35:08,060 But do try and circulate. 521 00:35:08,160 --> 00:35:11,020 Rule yourselves in rather than out. 522 00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:12,300 Today is about seeing if you have 523 00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:14,380 an emotional connection with anyone. 524 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:18,460 So I'll give you all some time to look through them. 525 00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:21,380 Ready? 526 00:35:57,560 --> 00:35:58,380 Pick me! Pick me! 527 00:35:58,480 --> 00:35:59,820 Pick me! Pick me! - Pick me! Pick me! 528 00:35:59,920 --> 00:36:00,860 Please, pick me! 529 00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:02,460 - Please, please! - Please, please, please! 530 00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:03,540 - Pick me! Pick me! - Please! Please! 531 00:36:03,640 --> 00:36:06,340 Okay, everybody, it's almost 10:30. 532 00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:09,340 I'm sure you're all really keen to get going. 533 00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:10,580 So if you're ready- 534 00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:13,860 please come on through. 535 00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:19,620 ♪ When the moon hits your eye ♪ 536 00:36:19,720 --> 00:36:24,100 ♪ Like a big pizza pie, that's amore ♪ 537 00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:26,220 ♪ That's amore ♪ 538 00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:28,300 ♪ When the world seems to shine ♪ 539 00:36:28,400 --> 00:36:32,740 ♪ Like you've had too much wine, that's amore ♪ 540 00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:35,260 ♪ That's amore ♪ 541 00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:36,220 ♪ Bells will ring ♪ 542 00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:37,300 ♪ Ding a-ling a-ling ♪ 543 00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:38,780 ♪ Ting a-ling a-ling ♪ 544 00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:41,220 ♪ And you'll sing, "Vita bella" ♪ 545 00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:44,140 ♪ Vita bell, vita bella ♪ 546 00:36:44,240 --> 00:36:45,340 ♪ Hearts will play ♪ 547 00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:47,660 ♪ Tippy-tippy-tay, tippy-tippy-tay ♪ 548 00:36:47,760 --> 00:36:51,340 ♪ Like a gay tarantella ♪ 549 00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:53,540 ♪ Lucky fella ♪ 550 00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:02,940 Uh, let's just wait a moment. 551 00:37:03,040 --> 00:37:06,480 Take our time, not feel the the pressure. 552 00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:10,440 Try and talk to them all. 553 00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:17,720 What do you think of this one, though? 554 00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:22,480 She had me at dress-up. 555 00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:26,700 ♪ Look for the bare necessities ♪ 556 00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:29,220 ♪ The simple bare necessities ♪ 557 00:37:29,320 --> 00:37:33,140 ♪ Forget about your worries and your strife ♪ 558 00:37:33,240 --> 00:37:35,980 ♪ I mean the bare necessities ♪ 559 00:37:36,080 --> 00:37:38,980 ♪ Or Mother Nature's recipes that bring ♪ 560 00:37:39,080 --> 00:37:41,340 It is wrong that I wanna take her magic wand 561 00:37:41,440 --> 00:37:44,140 and shove it up her ass. 562 00:37:44,240 --> 00:37:45,980 Star end first? 563 00:37:48,200 --> 00:37:50,300 There's plenty of time, boys. 564 00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:52,840 Go on, get out there. Mingle. 565 00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:19,400 Hi, I am Andy. What's your name? 566 00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:22,520 My name's Ezmie! 567 00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:25,380 Would you like to sit down? 568 00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:27,100 Uh, that, um... 569 00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:28,500 Of course we would. 570 00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:35,580 Hi, Ezmie. I'm Gabriel, Andy's partner. 571 00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:38,900 Gabriel, like the angel. I was Mary. 572 00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:42,380 Were you now? I bet you were a lovely Mary. 573 00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:44,180 I was, wasn't I, Paula? 574 00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:46,740 You were, sweetheart. 575 00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:48,940 And what are you making there, Ezmie? 576 00:38:49,040 --> 00:38:50,980 Dinosaur poo. 577 00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:52,620 Excellent! 578 00:38:52,720 --> 00:38:55,260 Andy loves nothing more than making dinosaur poo as well, 579 00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:56,820 don't you, Andy? 580 00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:01,980 Oh, yeah, mm-hmm. 581 00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:05,300 In fact, many people don't know this, 582 00:39:05,400 --> 00:39:08,660 but Andy's actually the second-best dinosaur poo maker 583 00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:10,660 in the whole world. 584 00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:13,020 Who's first-best then? 585 00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:16,780 Well, duh, you, Ezmie, of course. 586 00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:35,120 Uh, where did all that come from? 587 00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:37,540 What? 588 00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:39,640 You were lush! 589 00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:44,560 I mean, the way you just, like, oh, I freaked out. 590 00:39:46,240 --> 00:39:49,900 God, this is much harder than I thought. 591 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:51,300 I know. 592 00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:54,080 But you were amazing with her. 593 00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:58,620 You made it look so easy. 594 00:39:58,720 --> 00:40:00,720 That's because... 595 00:40:03,200 --> 00:40:06,440 Well, there was no pressure, was there? 596 00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:09,480 What do you mean? 597 00:40:10,040 --> 00:40:11,300 Because I knew there was no way 598 00:40:11,400 --> 00:40:13,660 that we would ever take her on. 599 00:40:30,920 --> 00:40:32,940 Hello. Can I sit here then? 600 00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:34,700 - Yeah. - Oh, thank you. 601 00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:38,060 Oh, that's a pretty dress. 602 00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:41,180 Don't mind if we join you, do you? 603 00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:43,280 No. 604 00:40:44,040 --> 00:40:47,500 Look, this matches. Do you like pink? 605 00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:48,740 It's my favourite colour. 606 00:40:48,840 --> 00:40:50,980 Yeah, me too! 607 00:40:51,080 --> 00:40:52,860 Excuse me, uh, Hazel? 608 00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:53,940 Yeah. 609 00:40:54,040 --> 00:40:56,580 Hi, yes, I was wondering if I might have a quick chat 610 00:40:56,680 --> 00:40:59,260 with you and your partner. 611 00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:00,900 Husband. 612 00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:03,220 Husband, of course. 613 00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:05,320 Come on. Come on! 614 00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:13,300 So Tamsin, I hear you like "Annie." 615 00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:36,140 I can't believe we're being upstaged 616 00:41:36,240 --> 00:41:38,140 by a bargain-basement fairy godmother 617 00:41:38,240 --> 00:41:40,840 and a closet case of a husband. 618 00:41:41,760 --> 00:41:43,300 When did we become the beige ones? 619 00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:45,220 We're supposed to be quiet in here. 620 00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:46,540 She can't even apply mascara properly. 621 00:41:46,640 --> 00:41:48,060 She looks like a massive twat. 622 00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:51,100 Be kind. You don't know what she's been through. 623 00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:53,940 Stop being so bloody nice all the time, would you? 624 00:41:54,040 --> 00:41:55,100 It is annoying. 625 00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:57,200 Shush, no. 626 00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:03,360 Don't. We'll have a semi now. 627 00:42:06,480 --> 00:42:09,380 Come on, let's do one more round. 628 00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:10,660 It's like being back at school 629 00:42:10,760 --> 00:42:13,620 and no one wants to play with us. 630 00:42:13,720 --> 00:42:14,740 That's how I feel, too. 631 00:42:14,840 --> 00:42:16,840 Oh, shit! 632 00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:25,600 Hi. 633 00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:27,620 How long have you been there? 634 00:42:27,720 --> 00:42:31,340 Since lunchtime. You two swear a lot. 635 00:42:31,440 --> 00:42:34,980 Uh, well, we didn't think anyone else was in here. 636 00:42:35,080 --> 00:42:39,100 I like spying on people. Are you gays? 637 00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:39,940 Sorry? 638 00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:42,700 'Cause Claire told me they might be gays here, 639 00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:45,620 but I've never met a real one before. 640 00:42:45,720 --> 00:42:46,900 ♪ Ta da ♪ 641 00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:51,080 Um, Claire, is she your, uh, your foster carer? 642 00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:53,980 Is, is she around anywhere? 643 00:42:54,080 --> 00:42:55,420 When you kissed, 644 00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:59,420 it sounded like you were slurping a giant ice lolly. 645 00:42:59,520 --> 00:43:01,520 Yuck, it was disgusting. 646 00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:05,340 I had to put my fingers in my ears. 647 00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:06,820 Do you have any lollies? 648 00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:08,180 Uh, no. 649 00:43:08,280 --> 00:43:09,780 Sweets? 650 00:43:09,880 --> 00:43:10,740 No. 651 00:43:10,840 --> 00:43:12,060 You're not trying very hard, 652 00:43:12,160 --> 00:43:13,900 'cause some of the others have sweets. 653 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:17,660 You need to bring sweets if you want us to like you. 654 00:43:17,760 --> 00:43:20,000 Fairy Godmother has sweets. 655 00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:29,360 But she's a massive twat. 656 00:43:38,560 --> 00:43:39,580 What are we doing? 657 00:43:39,680 --> 00:43:40,660 Following him. 658 00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:41,500 Why? 659 00:43:41,600 --> 00:43:42,500 I don't, I don't know. 660 00:43:42,600 --> 00:43:44,940 In case he says anything and we need to explain ourselves? 661 00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:47,580 Doesn't stalking child feel a bit pedo-y? 662 00:43:47,680 --> 00:43:49,680 No. Wait, does it? 663 00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:51,700 A bit. 664 00:43:51,800 --> 00:43:53,300 I can't believe he heard us! 665 00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:55,540 I can't believe he heard me say I had a semi! 666 00:43:55,640 --> 00:43:57,180 What if he says he heard me say I had a semi 667 00:43:57,280 --> 00:43:58,980 and they don't approve us 'cause I said I had a semi 668 00:43:59,080 --> 00:44:00,180 and he heard me say it? 669 00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:01,900 Well, Gabriel, that was kind of extraordinary. 670 00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:02,740 Stop it. I'm serious. 671 00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:04,820 I think we just broke all the rules in the brochure. 672 00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,300 No more than Fairy Godmother child-catcher. 673 00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:08,740 We didn't bribe him, did we? 674 00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:09,980 But we made out in front of him 675 00:44:10,080 --> 00:44:14,260 and called one of the other adopters a fucking twat. 676 00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:16,360 Who's a fucking twat? 677 00:44:17,720 --> 00:44:20,960 Jackie, I think we've done a boo-boo. 678 00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:24,340 We didn't know he was there! 679 00:44:24,440 --> 00:44:26,460 That's the first rule of parenting! 680 00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:27,860 We know, we know. 681 00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,740 Shouldn't we, uh, apologise or something? 682 00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:31,940 No, don't worry. 683 00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:35,060 Seriously, I know his social worker, Llinos. 684 00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:37,820 Plus his foster carer, Claire, is a hoot. 685 00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:40,020 It'll be fine. 686 00:44:40,120 --> 00:44:44,500 To be honest, that boy's heard helluva lot worse. 687 00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:46,820 Did you see his profile? 688 00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:49,380 We said between one and six. He's too old. 689 00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:51,020 Well, he's only just turned seven. 690 00:44:51,120 --> 00:44:52,700 Yeah, going on 40. 691 00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:57,580 Well, you would too if you'd been through what he has. 692 00:44:57,680 --> 00:45:00,580 Anyway, I will speak to his family finder, 693 00:45:00,680 --> 00:45:01,980 and we'll get him to introduce you 694 00:45:02,080 --> 00:45:03,300 to Llinos and Claire. 695 00:45:03,400 --> 00:45:05,100 Well, I thought we didn't need to apologise. 696 00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:06,220 Well, you don't. 697 00:45:06,320 --> 00:45:08,420 I just think you should chat with them about Jake. 698 00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:09,740 But he's a boy. 699 00:45:09,840 --> 00:45:12,940 I know, but keep an open mind, 700 00:45:13,040 --> 00:45:17,460 because it sounds to me like you've made a connection. 701 00:45:22,080 --> 00:45:25,140 Right, before I start, which one of you is the mum, 702 00:45:25,240 --> 00:45:27,500 and which one of you is the dad? 703 00:45:27,600 --> 00:45:29,140 Sorry? 704 00:45:29,240 --> 00:45:32,460 Gotcha! 705 00:45:32,560 --> 00:45:36,180 Look at their faces, Llinos. 706 00:45:36,280 --> 00:45:37,540 Don't worry, boys. 707 00:45:37,640 --> 00:45:39,340 My daughter's a lesbian, 708 00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:41,460 and when I had my first gay adopters, 709 00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:43,140 she kept telling me off for trying to work out 710 00:45:43,240 --> 00:45:45,860 which one was the mum and which one was the dad. 711 00:45:45,960 --> 00:45:48,340 But then I realised, one was both, 712 00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:53,460 and the other one was lazy. 713 00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:57,020 So I hear you're interested in my Jakey. 714 00:45:57,120 --> 00:45:58,420 - Well- - Yes. 715 00:45:58,520 --> 00:46:01,540 So what can I tell you about Jake? 716 00:46:01,640 --> 00:46:04,780 He's my biggest achievement, that's what he is. 717 00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:06,220 And you've been doing this for 30 years, 718 00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:08,380 so that's saying something. 719 00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:09,860 How many is it now? 720 00:46:09,960 --> 00:46:13,580 Think it's around 400 and counting. 721 00:46:13,680 --> 00:46:15,380 Sorry, 400 what? 722 00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:16,540 Children. 723 00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:17,980 Shit! 724 00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:21,060 Jake was right, you do have potty mouths. 725 00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:21,980 Sorry. 726 00:46:22,080 --> 00:46:23,860 I'm teasing. 727 00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:26,620 Anyway, some people thought he was unadoptable 728 00:46:26,720 --> 00:46:29,460 when he first came to me, didn't Llin? 729 00:46:29,560 --> 00:46:31,740 Said he was feral. 730 00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:35,480 Can you imagine that, calling a child feral? 731 00:46:36,320 --> 00:46:38,020 He wasn't feral. 732 00:46:38,120 --> 00:46:41,220 He was terrified, especially of men. 733 00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:43,420 Wouldn't come near Malcolm, that's my husband, 734 00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:45,060 first couple of weeks. 735 00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:48,300 So then Malcs started taking him on the school run. 736 00:46:48,400 --> 00:46:50,500 Jake could just about manage that, 737 00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:53,060 five minutes in the car with him, belted in the back 738 00:46:53,160 --> 00:46:55,660 where he didn't have to look him in the eye. 739 00:46:55,760 --> 00:46:59,940 But then, by the end of term, Malcs had him singing to 740 00:47:00,040 --> 00:47:02,540 ♪ Where do you go to, my lovely ♪ 741 00:47:02,640 --> 00:47:03,380 No way! 742 00:47:03,480 --> 00:47:06,300 That, that's the song Gabe performed the night we met. 743 00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:09,140 Well, there's a sign if ever I heard one! 744 00:47:09,240 --> 00:47:11,940 Huh, voice of an angel, Jake has. 745 00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:15,020 Mind you, he can be a right devil too sometimes, 746 00:47:15,120 --> 00:47:17,020 but nothing you can't handle. 747 00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:21,700 It's all bravado. He was under the sofa, wasn't he? 748 00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:26,500 Yeah, that'd be right. He likes to hide in small spaces. 749 00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:30,860 That way he can be sure no one else is in there with him. 750 00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:34,220 But what that boy needs more than anything else 751 00:47:34,320 --> 00:47:36,920 is patience, cuddles, and love. 752 00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:42,480 God, I'm gonna miss his cuddles. 753 00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:45,980 Gonna break my heart when he leaves. 754 00:47:46,080 --> 00:47:49,220 I'd adopt him myself, but I've got six already. 755 00:47:49,320 --> 00:47:50,260 Six! 756 00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:52,780 Three of my own, three adopted. 757 00:47:52,880 --> 00:47:57,500 And anyway, two dads will be bloody fantastic for him. 758 00:47:57,600 --> 00:47:59,620 As long as you can keep your hands off each other. 759 00:47:59,720 --> 00:48:02,340 Oh, we really are very sorry about all that. 760 00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:03,540 Don't be. 761 00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:05,580 Don't ever apologise for showing a child 762 00:48:05,680 --> 00:48:08,060 what real love looks like. 763 00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:24,300 You want a minute, boys? 764 00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:26,400 Please. 765 00:48:58,240 --> 00:49:01,160 That's so funny! That's so funny. 766 00:49:15,720 --> 00:49:18,800 We're all just children, aren't we? 767 00:49:28,320 --> 00:49:30,820 Couldn't we at least take a look at his CAR/B form? 768 00:49:30,920 --> 00:49:33,780 He's seven and a boy, and it's complex. 769 00:49:33,880 --> 00:49:35,540 We can't just keep moving the goalposts. 770 00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:37,060 I don't see what the problem is. 771 00:49:37,160 --> 00:49:39,220 - I don't want a boy! - But don't you feel that he- 772 00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:40,380 If it's just about feeling, 773 00:49:40,480 --> 00:49:44,280 why do we bother going through the assessment? 774 00:50:08,600 --> 00:50:11,540 Come on, sweetheart. 775 00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:36,800 Maybe we should have a look, just a look. 776 00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:38,660 It doesn't mean- 777 00:50:38,760 --> 00:50:41,280 I know, I know. Just a look. 778 00:51:06,920 --> 00:51:08,980 "Jake is an inquisitive, bright child 779 00:51:09,080 --> 00:51:11,180 with a vivid imagination." 780 00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:13,660 Out came their very own baby. 781 00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:15,180 "He's deeply affectionate 782 00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:18,700 but can be extremely hypervigilant, 783 00:51:18,800 --> 00:51:22,380 and his behaviour can sometimes be difficult to manage. 784 00:51:22,480 --> 00:51:25,060 However, this is much improved during placement, 785 00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:29,100 and Jake is responding well to praise and firm boundaries." 786 00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:31,020 You're safe, hun. You're safe, you're safe. 787 00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:33,660 "He's come a long way since he first arrived. 788 00:51:33,760 --> 00:51:36,580 He has a good relationship with both foster carers, 789 00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:41,060 demonstrating an ability to form a strong attachment. 790 00:51:41,160 --> 00:51:42,540 - What are you doing? 791 00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:43,580 Oh, my god! - You did it! 792 00:51:43,680 --> 00:51:46,180 I'm going, I'm going. - Get up! Go away! 793 00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:47,460 Get up! Get up! 794 00:51:47,560 --> 00:51:49,660 Though he still has issues with trust 795 00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:52,760 due to his early years' experiences. 796 00:51:55,520 --> 00:51:56,820 Let me see him! 797 00:52:01,320 --> 00:52:03,820 No, no, no, no, no, no, please! 798 00:52:03,920 --> 00:52:05,260 No, Jakey. Don't take Jakey! - Where's he going to? 799 00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:07,620 - Jakey, I'm sorry! - Jake! Jake! 800 00:52:07,720 --> 00:52:09,060 I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Jake. 801 00:52:09,160 --> 00:52:11,940 Let me see him! Let me see him! 802 00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:13,460 Let me see him! 803 00:52:46,520 --> 00:52:48,620 Is violence hereditary? 804 00:52:48,720 --> 00:52:50,720 No. I don't think so. 805 00:52:55,320 --> 00:52:57,660 Because what if he ends up hurting us? 806 00:52:57,760 --> 00:52:59,820 What if his dad turns up one day and kills us? 807 00:52:59,920 --> 00:53:03,340 That's highly unlikely though, isn't it? 808 00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:07,620 Well, still, there's no way I'd meet them. 809 00:53:07,720 --> 00:53:09,720 They're monsters. 810 00:53:10,040 --> 00:53:12,820 Does that mean that you're... 811 00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:14,920 I don't know, And. 812 00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:19,780 He's so far removed what we originally specified. 813 00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:21,180 He's a boy. I don't like boys. 814 00:53:21,280 --> 00:53:22,340 But you're gay! 815 00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:25,620 So I know what they're capable of! 816 00:53:25,720 --> 00:53:28,540 We shouldn't be seduced just because we've met him. 817 00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:30,940 We just need to think about the cold, hard facts. 818 00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:35,040 But he isn't a cold, hard fact anymore, is he? 819 00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:38,220 I knew this would happen. 820 00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:41,620 I knew that you would get attached. 821 00:53:41,720 --> 00:53:43,940 He's got some really intense needs, And. 822 00:53:44,040 --> 00:53:45,700 Look, I know. I know. 823 00:53:51,440 --> 00:53:53,380 What would you do, Billy? 824 00:53:56,720 --> 00:53:58,720 Do it, do it. Do it! 825 00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:05,540 Wrong gender, though. Billy was actually a girl. 826 00:54:05,640 --> 00:54:07,020 No, really? 827 00:54:07,120 --> 00:54:10,140 They only found out after she died. 828 00:54:10,240 --> 00:54:12,320 Well, that's the thing. 829 00:54:15,120 --> 00:54:19,740 There's always been a place for everyone in Victoria Park, 830 00:54:19,840 --> 00:54:22,160 no matter what their gender. 831 00:54:27,160 --> 00:54:28,780 What? 832 00:54:28,880 --> 00:54:30,880 You're such a twat. 833 00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:36,440 Just think about it. 834 00:54:39,120 --> 00:54:43,020 ♪ You talk like Marlene Dietrich ♪ 835 00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:47,140 ♪ And you dance like Zizi Jeanmaire ♪ 836 00:54:47,240 --> 00:54:51,180 ♪ Your clothes are all made by Balmain ♪ 837 00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:54,540 ♪ And there's diamonds and pearls in your hair ♪ 838 00:54:54,640 --> 00:54:55,660 ♪ Yes, there are ♪ 839 00:54:57,520 --> 00:55:01,460 ♪ You live in a fancy apartment ♪ 840 00:55:01,560 --> 00:55:05,420 ♪ Off the Boulevard St. Michel ♪ 841 00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:09,500 ♪ Where you keep your Rollings Stones records ♪ 842 00:55:09,600 --> 00:55:14,600 ♪ And a friend of Sacha Distel, yes, you do ♪ 843 00:55:16,160 --> 00:55:20,300 ♪ But where do you go to, my lovely ♪ 844 00:55:20,400 --> 00:55:24,300 ♪ When you're alone in your bed ♪ 845 00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:28,260 ♪ Tell me the thoughts that surround you ♪ 846 00:55:28,360 --> 00:55:33,360 ♪ I want to look inside your head, yes, I do ♪ 847 00:55:33,960 --> 00:55:38,380 ♪ I remember the back streets of Naples ♪ 848 00:55:38,480 --> 00:55:42,660 ♪ Two children begging in rags ♪ 849 00:55:42,760 --> 00:55:46,700 ♪ Both touched with a burning ambition ♪ 850 00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:51,800 ♪ To shake off their earthly-born tags, they tried ♪ 851 00:55:52,480 --> 00:55:56,940 ♪ So look into my face, Marie-Claire ♪ 852 00:55:57,040 --> 00:56:01,220 ♪ And remember just who you are ♪ 853 00:56:01,320 --> 00:56:02,380 ♪ Then go and forget me ♪ 854 00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:03,180 What? 855 00:56:03,280 --> 00:56:04,420 ♪ Forever ♪ 856 00:56:04,520 --> 00:56:05,500 Let's do it. 857 00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:09,340 ♪ But I know you still bear the scar deep inside ♪ 858 00:56:09,440 --> 00:56:11,300 ♪ Yes, you do ♪ 859 00:56:11,400 --> 00:56:15,740 ♪ I know where you go to, my lovely ♪ 860 00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:19,940 ♪ When you're alone in your bed ♪ 861 00:56:20,040 --> 00:56:23,700 ♪ I know the thoughts that surround you ♪ 862 00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:28,240 ♪ 'Cause I can look inside your head ♪