1 00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:11,280 ♪ Wellness 2 00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:28,839 ♪ It's 7:00am 3 00:00:28,840 --> 00:00:31,319 ♪ I wake after having had on average 4 00:00:31,320 --> 00:00:34,119 ♪ Seven hours and 41 minutes sleep 5 00:00:34,120 --> 00:00:36,519 ♪ I've analysed my sleep over the years 6 00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:39,120 ♪ And found this is the perfect amount for me 7 00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:46,039 ♪ I often got to Hyde Park, take off my shoes 8 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:48,559 ♪ And stare at the sun for 20 minutes 9 00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:50,279 ♪ Being barefoot grounds me 10 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:52,759 ♪ And I receive electrons from the Earth 11 00:00:52,760 --> 00:00:55,919 ♪ I sun-stare because the UV rays aren't toxic in my eyes 12 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:57,679 ♪ The first hour after sunrise 13 00:00:57,680 --> 00:00:59,920 ♪ And it resets my circadian rhythms 14 00:01:02,720 --> 00:01:04,239 ♪ 8:30 15 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:06,239 ♪ Turn on my human charger 16 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:08,999 ♪ A device that shines light into my ear and gives me energy... 17 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,640 Big day today? Yep! 18 00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:21,319 ♪ At some point between meetings 19 00:01:21,320 --> 00:01:23,719 ♪ I try to have a shot of activated charcoal 20 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:25,559 ♪ They sell it out of Pret now 21 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:28,240 ♪ Mm, we're so blessed in Britain Cheers buddy. 22 00:01:30,200 --> 00:01:32,559 I love you! Seamus! / Seamus! 23 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,519 Hey you. Seamus? 24 00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:37,519 I just wanted to say a quick hello- Oh yeah! Sure, let's do this. 25 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:40,159 Ok, here we go... Smile! 26 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:42,999 Have a good day, you. 27 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,639 Seamus! Hey, buddy. 28 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,679 There's lots of- WOMAN: Sorry... 29 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:48,879 Seamus. 30 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:51,279 They said we've got to have it out by Thursday. 31 00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:53,399 Seamus! Hey, Tim! 32 00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:56,359 Seamus! Ah-ha-ha! 33 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:02,879 Ndidi. Hi. 34 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:05,639 Uh, have you two already met? 35 00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:07,640 Sort of. I'm Ndidi. 36 00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:12,079 Your producer. Oh, hi! 37 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:14,399 God. I'm sorry, I thought you were a... 38 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:17,239 I thought you were a fan! Oh no, I am a fan! 39 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:19,999 But I'm-I'm also a producer! Agh! 40 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,720 I feel like a dick! 41 00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:28,639 Right, come on! Yeah, yeah. 42 00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:31,599 That's it so far. Seamus O'Hannigan's TV show. 43 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:34,879 It's fucking amazing! When can I tweet about it? 44 00:02:34,880 --> 00:02:37,559 We're officially announcing at noon. And there's been a change 45 00:02:37,560 --> 00:02:40,199 in location too. I don't know if your agent's told you. 46 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:42,279 No? We're broadcasting from somewhere 47 00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:44,719 a bit different from the norm. It's really exciting. 48 00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:47,360 Somewhere you know very well. Begins with an I. 49 00:02:49,640 --> 00:02:51,639 Islington! Woo! I won't even need a driver! 50 00:02:51,640 --> 00:02:54,079 No, no, no, no Ireland. Northern Ireland. 51 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:56,319 Belfast, to be precise. 52 00:02:56,320 --> 00:02:59,199 Belfast? We thought you'd be happy. 53 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:02,399 Isn't that where you're from? Um... 54 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,759 Well, my-my mum was, yeah, but I... 55 00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:06,719 I haven't been back for years. 56 00:03:06,720 --> 00:03:09,359 It's not ideal, but you only have to be there one or two days a week. 57 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:12,159 We're under pressure to produce more content from outside London. 58 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:14,919 It was Belfast or Cardiff, so we thought with your background- 59 00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:17,319 This is good. I'm... No, I'm-I'm happy. 60 00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:19,759 Give me a chance to... 61 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:22,760 "get back in touch wit' me roots". 62 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,639 ♪ YOUNG SPENCER: Straight Outta Belfast 63 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:28,759 ♪ Straight out of Belfast and I'm bringing the boys 64 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:30,839 ♪ I got on Luca on the beat, we're bringing the noise 65 00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:32,599 ♪ In the north, west, south, and the east 66 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,399 ♪ I've reds, blues, orange and greens 67 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:36,359 ♪ In the Woodvale, Oldpark, GC, BS 68 00:03:36,360 --> 00:03:38,239 ♪ Screaming skulls and the SRD 69 00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:39,999 ♪ Ah, in the west, Poleglass and Twinbrook 70 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:41,799 ♪ Ah, down Divis that be spinning the wheels 71 00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:43,559 ♪ Ain't no ah can do what we do 72 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:45,520 ♪ Bombing MD... Fuck it. 73 00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:48,719 ♪ ..Keeper lit ya cunt, yee. ♪ 74 00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:56,479 Damaged goods. 75 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:00,960 Janet? 76 00:04:11,080 --> 00:04:13,439 I'll keep this brief, Janet. You'll keep what brief? 77 00:04:13,440 --> 00:04:15,839 What I'm about to say to you. What are you about to say? 78 00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:17,999 I'm about to say it if you'll let me speak- 79 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,799 Oh, I wouldn't call this brief. Stop it! 80 00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:21,599 Stop everything you're doing. 81 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:23,839 The swearing, lateness, stealing-I don't swear. 82 00:04:23,840 --> 00:04:26,039 You swore at Jason. He provoked me. 83 00:04:26,040 --> 00:04:27,840 Why, what did he say? "Good morning" 84 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:32,240 So, he said "good morning" and you said... 85 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,999 "Suck a fucking dick"? Who says "good morning" anyway? 86 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,639 I mean, what does he think he is? A fucking Disney princess?! 87 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:41,599 He's lucky I didn't punch him. Janet, I do not enjoy firing people. 88 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:45,159 But if you keep going like this- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll stop it. 89 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:48,079 I'll stop everything. Yeah. Take the rest of the day off. 90 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:50,640 Come in tomorrow with a new attitude. I'll do it tonight. 91 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:55,240 Do what? 92 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:01,119 How's your mental health these days? 93 00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:04,080 Suck a fucking dick, Philip. 94 00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:08,799 The issue of setting up a truth and Reconciliation Commission... 95 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,559 The visiting group of senators will be talking to the leaders 96 00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:14,439 of all the main parties to try to find a way forward... 97 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:18,639 Join me, Seamus O'Hannigan, for a brand-new current affairs show 98 00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:22,039 broadcasting live from Belfast this Sunday. 99 00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:24,119 This Sunday with Seamus O'Hannigan. 100 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:27,919 We'll be talking to the UK's leading politicians and asking them 101 00:05:27,920 --> 00:05:31,559 the questions you want answered. So join us this Sunday for 102 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:36,640 This Sunday with Seamus O'Hannigan, with me, Seamus O'Hannigan. 103 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,359 Cut! It's a bit repetitive isn't it? 104 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:41,839 Yeah... A few too many "This Sundays". 105 00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:44,079 Yeah. And too many "Seamus O'Hannigans"? 106 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:49,039 Yeah. Yeah. 107 00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:51,479 Yeah, maybe. 108 00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:08,239 Ndidi. Yeah? 109 00:06:08,240 --> 00:06:09,879 Ndidi? Yeah. 110 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:11,920 Er... Sorry. Thanks. 111 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:15,799 Are these... Are these new pages? 112 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:18,279 I thought you'd missed some important points. / Yeah. 113 00:06:18,280 --> 00:06:20,239 Let's not bring up suicide, shall we? 114 00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:22,479 We don't want to lose our audience in the first week. 115 00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:25,439 Northern Ireland has one of the highest suicide rates in the UK. 116 00:06:25,440 --> 00:06:28,159 I thought we should at least- Look, I get it Ndidi. You're... 117 00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:30,399 keen to make a mark. But, um, hey, 118 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:33,880 I've been doing this a long time. So, let me try something, OK? 119 00:06:38,360 --> 00:06:40,520 What is unemployment? 120 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:45,759 Wikipedia defines unemployment as "the situation of actively 121 00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:49,480 looking for employment whilst not currently being employed". 122 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:53,879 Like these "lads" you see standing next me. 123 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:57,439 Here, in this divided city, still reeling 124 00:06:57,440 --> 00:06:59,919 from the collective national trauma 125 00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:02,639 of the conflict known as "The Troubles". 126 00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:05,919 You can sense the legacy of violence 127 00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:08,719 still resting on their young shoulders. 128 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:11,719 Now, to you or I they may seem desperate, 129 00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:14,240 dangerous, criminal, even. 130 00:07:14,960 --> 00:07:16,839 Hello! / Fuck off. These young men... 131 00:07:16,840 --> 00:07:19,279 Dickhead. Seek only one thing... 132 00:07:19,280 --> 00:07:21,880 Hope. 133 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:25,159 Jesus fucking Christ! Who are you calling dangerous? 134 00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:27,479 I wasn't actually calling you-God! Everyone calm down. 135 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:29,439 No! Stop it! 136 00:07:29,440 --> 00:07:30,959 We have permission to film! Blah! 137 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:32,759 Help! Jesus! 138 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:35,120 Please, get off him! Call the police! 139 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,599 Leave me alone! Leave me alone! 140 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,919 Help! 141 00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:43,079 Seamus! 142 00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:57,919 There he is! Get after him! 143 00:07:57,920 --> 00:08:00,040 Fuck. 144 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:08,119 Little shits! Come here! Come back! 145 00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,200 We only want to talk to you about your TV show. 146 00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:17,639 Fuck! 147 00:09:19,920 --> 00:09:22,320 Grab those legs! 148 00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:42,719 Help me! 149 00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:00,120 You saved my life. 150 00:10:02,520 --> 00:10:04,199 You saved mine. 151 00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:06,399 Fucking prick! They took my phone. Wait! 152 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:08,239 Can I just come in and, um... 153 00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:10,239 Please, er, can I call a taxi? 154 00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:12,680 Can a girl not kill herself in peace today?! 155 00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:30,479 And as we enter this year's marching season, 156 00:10:30,480 --> 00:10:33,599 tensions are rising throughout the province... 157 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,599 I'm fucking drenched. 158 00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:37,759 Fucking all over you. Look at the state of yous. 159 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:39,479 Fuckin' all over me. 160 00:10:39,480 --> 00:10:42,479 Of parades but as yet no consensus has been... 161 00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:45,319 fighting this battle for... starting to hot up, 162 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:47,519 but the red team and the blue team 163 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:49,559 are trying to make a profit of their own. 164 00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:53,320 Hello. Hi. 165 00:10:54,360 --> 00:10:58,159 Um, listen, would you... would you mind if I wait inside? 166 00:10:58,160 --> 00:11:00,399 It's just there's still some rather... 167 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,279 unsavoury characters out there and, um... 168 00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:05,080 Do you wanna watch TV? 169 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:09,119 Y-Y-Yeah, yeah? 170 00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:33,840 There's nothing on. Oh? 171 00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:39,960 Oh! Shit my phone! 172 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,399 How long did they say they'd be? The taxi? 173 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:56,760 Yeah. Um... Oh, er, about... 174 00:11:58,120 --> 00:12:01,280 20 minutes, so not long. 175 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:04,479 No. 176 00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:06,519 Not long at all. 177 00:12:06,520 --> 00:12:09,600 You hungry? 178 00:12:11,560 --> 00:12:13,559 It's just toast. 179 00:12:13,560 --> 00:12:16,039 I wasn't planning on having dinner tonight. 180 00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:23,280 So... why do you want to kill yourself? 181 00:12:24,680 --> 00:12:26,879 What brings you to Belfast? Oh, um... 182 00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:29,359 I'm, uh, presenting a TV series. 183 00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:30,799 You're presenting? Yes. 184 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:32,319 A TV series? Yes. 185 00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:33,799 You're presenting? Yes. 186 00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:35,279 A TV series? Yes. 187 00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:37,359 Are you a TV presenter? Yeah. 188 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:39,279 Fuck off! That was quite sore actually. 189 00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:41,479 Are you famous? Er, well kind of. 190 00:12:41,480 --> 00:12:43,559 Ow. Could you stop hitting me please? 191 00:12:43,560 --> 00:12:46,999 Fuck! A famous TV presenter! 192 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,039 In my kitchen! 193 00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:52,200 Do you really not know who I am? No. 194 00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:55,839 I thought you did the way you were looking at me in the bedroom. 195 00:12:55,840 --> 00:12:57,799 I wasn't looking at you in the bedroom. / You were. 196 00:12:57,800 --> 00:13:00,879 You were looking at me in the mirror. / I don't know what you're talking about. 197 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:03,079 If anything, you were looking at me. How would you know 198 00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:05,479 I was looking at you unless you were looking at me? 199 00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:08,079 What's your TV show called? Uh, it's called 200 00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:11,679 This Sunday with Seamus O'Hannigan. Who's Seamus O'Hannigan? 201 00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:14,240 Well, I am. Oh. 202 00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:18,279 What other TV shows have you presented? / Uh... 203 00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:20,319 Well... Well, technically... 204 00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:22,919 OK, I came from radio-You're not actually a TV presenter. 205 00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:24,839 Well, I mean I've guest presented things. 206 00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:26,879 I've been a panellist on other shows. 207 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:28,879 What kind of shows? The Politics Hour. 208 00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:30,719 Never heard of it. Politics Today? 209 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:32,279 Nope. The Political Notebook? 210 00:13:32,280 --> 00:13:35,879 I don't really follow politics. That's probably why you haven't heard of me. 211 00:13:35,880 --> 00:13:38,359 Probably cos you're not really famous. / But I am quite famous. 212 00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:41,559 But not famous like Charlotte Crosby or Stacey Solomon. / Who are they? 213 00:13:41,560 --> 00:13:43,639 Geordie Shore? Who's Geordie Shore? 214 00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:46,279 Oh no, don't worry, don't worry, I-I'll look them up. 215 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:48,320 Oh, fucking hell, my phone! 216 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,879 How do you not know who Stacey Solomon is? 217 00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:54,279 X Factor? I'm a Celebrity? Celebrity Juice? 218 00:13:54,280 --> 00:13:57,679 Celebrity Gogglebox? Oh jeez, you mean Reality TV? 219 00:13:57,680 --> 00:14:00,479 Jesus Christ, no. I mean, that's just for ignorant morons 220 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:03,000 who'd be better off shooting themselves in the fucking face. 221 00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:10,320 No offence. 222 00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,240 That'll be your taxi. 223 00:14:15,960 --> 00:14:17,920 Yeah... 224 00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:29,800 Uh... Listen, are you gonna be ok? 225 00:14:50,920 --> 00:14:52,640 Fuck! 226 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:04,760 Oh fuck! Oh shit! 227 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,359 Fuck, fuck, oh fuck. 228 00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:10,239 Fuck, oh shit. 229 00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:12,280 Oh? Oh fuck! 230 00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:15,399 Oh. 231 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:17,839 Fucking hell! 232 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:22,439 What are you doing here? 233 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:24,679 I thought you were trying to kill yourself again. 234 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:26,480 I'm eating a bar of chocolate. 235 00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:33,840 Would you mind calling me a taxi? Again? 236 00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:37,920 Please? 237 00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:45,639 Er, no, that's dead on. I'll try someone else. 238 00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:02,519 I've rang every taxi firm in East Belfast. 239 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:04,839 They're all booked up. You won't get a cab for hours. 240 00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:06,919 Oh... fuck. 241 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:10,159 Is-Is there no one else you can try? Look, mate, I'm not doing this 242 00:16:10,160 --> 00:16:13,279 all night! Sorry, yeah. Ok. Well, thanks... 243 00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:16,119 I can walk, I suppose. 244 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:18,480 Thanks for trying. 245 00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:25,039 You're welcome to stay the night. Oh. Uh, well... 246 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:27,319 Obviously, I don't mean- No, I know, no I mean I- 247 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:30,199 It's just it's late, you know-I didn't think you meant anything. 248 00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:32,039 Anyway, the offer's there. I appreciate it. 249 00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:34,439 It's not an offer of anything more than a bed. / Right. Right. 250 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,439 Oh and when I say bed, you know, I don't mean, fucking-Gotcha. 251 00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:48,559 You can sleep on the sofa. Thanks. 252 00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:54,000 Woo-hoo! 253 00:16:58,160 --> 00:17:00,759 Yeah! 254 00:17:12,580 --> 00:17:15,019 So, do I have to worry about an irate husband 255 00:17:15,020 --> 00:17:19,099 coming home and finding a strange man on his sofa? 256 00:17:19,100 --> 00:17:21,499 My husband's dead. 257 00:17:21,500 --> 00:17:23,940 Oh. Sorry. 258 00:17:25,580 --> 00:17:27,860 He died two months ago. 259 00:17:28,620 --> 00:17:31,059 Is that why you're depressed? Who said I was depressed? 260 00:17:31,060 --> 00:17:33,619 Oh, um, well you were... 261 00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:37,059 You were trying to ki... Uh... 262 00:17:37,060 --> 00:17:39,100 I'd prefer not to talk about it. OK. 263 00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:45,340 It's just, it-it's good to talk about these things. You know. 264 00:17:46,540 --> 00:17:50,180 It's good to... It can be helpful to get them off your chest. 265 00:17:50,980 --> 00:17:53,260 And I'm-I'm a very good listener. 266 00:17:54,580 --> 00:17:57,579 Well, actually-In fact, I-I-I once interviewed 267 00:17:57,580 --> 00:18:01,580 the former Archbishop of Canterbury, Rowan Williams, and he said... 268 00:18:02,260 --> 00:18:06,019 he said, it was the best interview he's ever done because... 269 00:18:06,020 --> 00:18:08,060 because I'm such a good listener. 270 00:18:08,740 --> 00:18:11,299 Yeah, it might be good to talk about it, actually. / Yeah. 271 00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:13,340 Yeah... 272 00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:26,699 So, how did he die? I killed him. 273 00:18:26,700 --> 00:18:28,539 What? 274 00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,580 I murdered him. Oh... 275 00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:33,300 It was a sex game gone wrong. 276 00:18:34,860 --> 00:18:37,660 I was dominating him and I took it too far. 277 00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:42,659 I shoved a... what do you call it? 278 00:18:42,660 --> 00:18:45,699 It's like a... it's like a vibrator, but it... 279 00:18:45,700 --> 00:18:47,619 it doesn't vibrate. A dildo? 280 00:18:47,620 --> 00:18:49,259 Dildo? / Yeah. Yeah, a dildo. 281 00:18:49,260 --> 00:18:52,060 Yeah, I shoved a dildo down his throat and he, um... 282 00:18:54,980 --> 00:18:56,780 he choked on it. 283 00:18:59,140 --> 00:19:01,140 He choked on a dildo. 284 00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:05,180 Mm. 285 00:19:13,140 --> 00:19:15,219 I'm joking. 286 00:19:15,220 --> 00:19:17,220 Fu... 287 00:19:26,620 --> 00:19:28,940 He left me for another woman. 288 00:19:31,780 --> 00:19:33,620 Sleep tight. 289 00:20:18,140 --> 00:20:20,379 Hi. Jesus Christ! 290 00:20:20,380 --> 00:20:23,179 I couldn't sleep in my room because of the broken window. 291 00:20:23,180 --> 00:20:25,220 Yeah. It's too cold. 292 00:21:49,020 --> 00:21:51,180 Hiya. 293 00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:54,100 Hi. 294 00:22:02,180 --> 00:22:04,180 Better get ready for work. 295 00:22:07,900 --> 00:22:10,299 'This Sunday with...' 296 00:22:10,300 --> 00:22:12,699 'Hello and welcome to the very first... very first... 297 00:22:12,700 --> 00:22:15,859 Oh shit. Come on. This Sunday with Seamus... 298 00:22:15,860 --> 00:22:17,899 Hello we're in Belfast live for...' 299 00:22:17,900 --> 00:22:20,700 Morning. 300 00:22:23,100 --> 00:22:25,699 You alright? 301 00:22:25,700 --> 00:22:28,659 Yeah, just... just a bit nervous. 302 00:22:28,660 --> 00:22:30,739 About this interview. What interview? 303 00:22:30,740 --> 00:22:33,139 I'm interviewing the, uh... 304 00:22:33,140 --> 00:22:36,140 the Secretary of State for Work and Pensions. 305 00:22:37,620 --> 00:22:40,139 You know, when I'm nervous I sing. 306 00:22:40,140 --> 00:22:42,139 Sorry, you what? I made up this wee song 307 00:22:42,140 --> 00:22:44,780 and I sing it to myself whenever I feel nervous. 308 00:22:46,380 --> 00:22:48,379 Come on, let's hear it then. 309 00:22:48,380 --> 00:22:50,539 No, I don't think so. Come on sing the song. 310 00:22:50,540 --> 00:22:52,619 No, I'm not singing it. Please sing the song. 311 00:22:52,620 --> 00:22:55,099 I'm not singing it. It really... I wanna hear- 312 00:22:55,100 --> 00:22:59,059 Don't be nervous. Nerves are for dickheads. 313 00:22:59,060 --> 00:23:02,819 So, if you're nervous that makes you a dickhead 314 00:23:02,820 --> 00:23:07,339 So, don't be... 315 00:23:07,340 --> 00:23:09,380 fucking nervous. 316 00:23:11,020 --> 00:23:13,139 Wow! / I knew you wouldn't fucking appreciate it. 317 00:23:13,140 --> 00:23:15,139 No, no, it's not that, it's just, it's like, 318 00:23:15,140 --> 00:23:18,019 let's be honest, it doesn't rhyme at all. / So? 319 00:23:18,020 --> 00:23:19,859 Well, I mean, there's no tune. 320 00:23:19,860 --> 00:23:22,340 I mean, you couldn't categorise it as a song. 321 00:23:23,460 --> 00:23:27,060 Well, it's worked though, hasn't it? How? 322 00:23:28,260 --> 00:23:30,860 It's... You're not worrying anymore. 323 00:23:47,140 --> 00:23:48,819 Yeah. 324 00:23:48,820 --> 00:23:50,979 ♪ RYAN MCMULLAN: RUTHLESS CUPID 325 00:23:50,980 --> 00:23:53,500 ♪ Don't wanna leave but I gotta go home 326 00:23:54,380 --> 00:23:57,259 ♪ Where'd you come from, where did you go? 327 00:23:57,260 --> 00:24:00,619 ♪ I don't recall ever feeling so low 328 00:24:00,620 --> 00:24:04,379 ♪ Washed up and burned out, 30 years old 329 00:24:04,380 --> 00:24:07,099 ♪ I'm holding out for a little romance 330 00:24:07,100 --> 00:24:10,219 ♪ But nobody's ever said "shut up and dance" 331 00:24:10,220 --> 00:24:13,499 ♪ Like the way that you did babe 332 00:24:13,500 --> 00:24:18,020 ♪ Yeah, you made me feel something 333 00:24:20,660 --> 00:24:22,899 What? ♪ Oh, honey come back 334 00:24:22,900 --> 00:24:25,100 ♪ You never told me your name 335 00:24:27,860 --> 00:24:31,259 ♪ What kind of game have you got me in? 336 00:24:31,260 --> 00:24:34,139 ♪ Whatever it is, I'd let you win 337 00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:37,579 ♪ Oh, now I see you with some other guy 338 00:24:37,580 --> 00:24:40,179 ♪ Washed up and pissed off... If you can't stand the heat, 339 00:24:40,180 --> 00:24:42,499 then get out of the kitchen. I hope you've enjoyed 340 00:24:42,500 --> 00:24:44,539 this first show as much as I have. 341 00:24:44,540 --> 00:24:46,979 Thanks for joining us. See you next Sunday. 342 00:24:50,340 --> 00:24:53,499 Keep her lit, Seamus. 343 00:24:53,500 --> 00:24:55,899 Well done Seamus, that was brilliant. 344 00:24:55,900 --> 00:24:58,459 We love you Seamus! 345 00:24:58,460 --> 00:25:01,859 Get on Seamus. 346 00:25:01,860 --> 00:25:05,100 ♪ Oh, honey come back, you never told me your name 347 00:25:06,700 --> 00:25:08,659 Good morning. 348 00:25:08,660 --> 00:25:14,139 ♪ I should've known it would always end up this way 349 00:25:14,140 --> 00:25:17,579 ♪ Oh, Cupid, you're ruthless 350 00:25:17,580 --> 00:25:20,899 ♪ Oh, Cupid, I'm just stupid 351 00:25:20,900 --> 00:25:25,020 ♪ But Cupid, this goose chase ain't over yet. ♪ 352 00:25:37,380 --> 00:25:39,619 Ladies and Gentlemen, 353 00:25:39,620 --> 00:25:42,259 we are experiencing a little turbulence coming into London. 354 00:25:42,260 --> 00:25:44,179 Please remain in your seats as the captain has 355 00:25:44,180 --> 00:25:45,899 put on the fasten your seatbelt sign. 356 00:25:54,340 --> 00:25:56,979 Don't be nervous. 357 00:25:56,980 --> 00:25:58,780 Nerves are for dickheads. 358 00:26:01,140 --> 00:26:04,299 So, if you're nervous, it makes you a dickhead. 359 00:26:04,300 --> 00:26:07,819 So, don't be... 360 00:26:07,820 --> 00:26:09,860 fucking nervous. 361 00:26:20,100 --> 00:26:21,779 Huh. 362 00:26:35,140 --> 00:26:37,579 Seamus? I thought you were still in Ireland. 363 00:26:37,580 --> 00:26:39,579 I just got back. 364 00:26:39,580 --> 00:26:41,299 Oh my God, what happened to your face? 365 00:26:41,300 --> 00:26:43,739 I was attacked by a gang of thugs in Belfast. 366 00:26:43,740 --> 00:26:46,180 Why didn't you call me? They stole my phone. 367 00:26:46,860 --> 00:26:48,860 Hi. Hi. 368 00:26:51,380 --> 00:26:54,059 Did-Did you still do the show? Didn't you watch it? 369 00:26:54,060 --> 00:26:56,539 Sorry, I actually was filming all night. 370 00:26:56,540 --> 00:26:58,660 Did you see my interview in The Observer? 371 00:27:32,860 --> 00:27:35,619 They mentioned you a lot. Me? It's not about me. 372 00:27:35,620 --> 00:27:39,139 You're a totally brilliant actor in your own right. 373 00:27:39,140 --> 00:27:41,740 I'm so sick of this patriarchal bullshit! 374 00:27:45,580 --> 00:27:47,580 Shall we go for dinner? 375 00:27:51,100 --> 00:27:53,140 ♪ THE VACCINES: If You Wanna 376 00:28:10,860 --> 00:28:13,779 ♪ Well, I don't want to wake up in the morning 377 00:28:13,780 --> 00:28:17,219 ♪ But I've got to face the day 378 00:28:17,220 --> 00:28:19,099 ♪ That's what all the friends 379 00:28:19,100 --> 00:28:23,660 ♪ I do not like as much as you say 380 00:28:24,340 --> 00:28:27,299 ♪ I don't want to do things independently 381 00:28:27,300 --> 00:28:30,259 ♪ But I can't make you stay 382 00:28:30,260 --> 00:28:32,219 ♪ That's what all the friends 383 00:28:32,220 --> 00:28:36,540 ♪ I do not like as much as you say 384 00:28:40,020 --> 00:28:43,019 ♪ But if you wanna come back it's alright, it's alright 385 00:28:43,020 --> 00:28:46,019 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back 386 00:28:46,020 --> 00:28:49,299 ♪ Do you wanna come back? It's alright, it's alright 387 00:28:49,300 --> 00:28:53,220 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back to me 388 00:28:57,220 --> 00:28:59,899 ♪ Alone 389 00:28:59,900 --> 00:29:02,860 ♪ All alone 390 00:29:03,740 --> 00:29:09,139 ♪ I, I am on my own 391 00:29:09,140 --> 00:29:11,579 ♪ Alone 392 00:29:11,580 --> 00:29:15,339 ♪ All alone 393 00:29:15,340 --> 00:29:20,579 ♪ I, I am on my own 394 00:29:20,580 --> 00:29:24,099 ♪ But if you wanna come back it's alright, it's alright 395 00:29:24,100 --> 00:29:26,659 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back 396 00:29:26,660 --> 00:29:29,819 ♪ Do you wanna come back? It's alright, it's alright 397 00:29:29,820 --> 00:29:33,140 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back to me 398 00:29:43,780 --> 00:29:47,339 ♪ But do you wanna come back? It's alright, it's alright 399 00:29:47,340 --> 00:29:49,899 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back 400 00:29:49,900 --> 00:29:53,059 ♪ Do you wanna come back? It's alright, it's alright 401 00:29:53,060 --> 00:29:55,659 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back 402 00:29:55,660 --> 00:29:58,899 ♪ Do you wanna come back? It's alright, it's alright 403 00:29:58,900 --> 00:30:01,419 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back 404 00:30:01,420 --> 00:30:04,739 ♪ Do you wanna come back? It's alright, it's alright 405 00:30:04,740 --> 00:30:08,620 ♪ It's alright if you wanna come back to me. ♪ 406 00:30:41,260 --> 00:30:44,540 AccessibleCustomerService@sky.uk