1
00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:26,944
貝莉,聽我說

2
00:00:27,987 --> 00:00:29,447
我們當朋友也很久了

3
00:00:30,364 --> 00:00:31,532
從小就認識

4
00:00:32,533 --> 00:00:33,826
但我現在上高中了

5
00:00:34,327 --> 00:00:35,912
有件事得告訴你

6
00:00:37,038 --> 00:00:40,333
請先聽我說完再回答

7
00:00:42,126 --> 00:00:43,044
{\an8}我喜歡你

8
00:00:43,878 --> 00:00:45,213
{\an8}我喜歡你很久了

9
00:00:45,797 --> 00:00:47,131
{\an8}不知道你是不是也喜歡我

10
00:00:48,007 --> 00:00:49,717
{\an8}但我不想再搞曖昧了

11
00:00:59,644 --> 00:01:01,270
不錯,你很會喔

12
00:01:01,270 --> 00:01:03,356
我也是?謝謝

13
00:01:03,356 --> 00:01:04,941
大概是自然而然...

14
00:01:08,903 --> 00:01:09,779
你不會敲門嗎?

15
00:01:11,322 --> 00:01:12,532
你在幹嘛啊?

16
00:01:12,532 --> 00:01:14,575
沒幹嘛,我在擠痘痘,出去啦

17
00:01:16,619 --> 00:01:18,955
我還以為你在幹門咧

18
00:01:18,955 --> 00:01:19,872
你可以快滾嗎?

19
00:01:19,872 --> 00:01:22,917
媽要我來確定你起來了
看來你真的“起來”了

20
00:01:22,917 --> 00:01:24,460
滾出去

21
00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:27,171
高中一定會讓你生不如死

22
00:01:29,674 --> 00:01:32,677
《新生嚇嚇叫》

23
00:01:33,803 --> 00:01:35,429
小班!早餐好了!

24
00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:39,142
艾莉莎,手機可以收起來嗎?

25
00:01:39,142 --> 00:01:42,979
讓你隆鼻的目的
就是要讓你別像以前那麼在意

26
00:01:42,979 --> 00:01:44,355
這叫做自信

27
00:01:44,355 --> 00:01:46,357
還真有自信,自信到整了自己的臉

28
00:01:46,357 --> 00:01:48,693
我只是不認同我天生的鼻子

29
00:01:48,693 --> 00:01:51,237
又有勇氣能實踐真我,所以囉

30
00:01:51,237 --> 00:01:53,489
天啊,好勇敢喔

31
00:01:53,489 --> 00:01:55,867
然後你女友甩了你去找瓊妮哈德森

32
00:01:55,867 --> 00:01:58,452
別在我面前提到那個婊子的名字

33
00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:01,497
夠了,大家先深呼吸

34
00:02:01,497 --> 00:02:02,582
早安

35
00:02:03,082 --> 00:02:03,916
開動吧

36
00:02:06,252 --> 00:02:07,336
我不用了

37
00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:08,754
一顆藍莓不算正餐

38
00:02:08,754 --> 00:02:10,089
貝莉和我要去喝果昔

39
00:02:10,089 --> 00:02:12,049
- 貝莉要過來?
- 貝莉要過來?

40
00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:13,467
對,大概再30秒

41
00:02:13,467 --> 00:02:16,470
盡量不要噴精噴到她黏在牆上

42
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:20,308
拜託喔,艾莉莎,好噁
可以拜託你別那麼噁心嗎?

43
00:02:20,933 --> 00:02:22,310
早安

44
00:02:30,193 --> 00:02:31,068
貝莉,你好

45
00:02:31,068 --> 00:02:32,320
小班,你好

46
00:02:33,404 --> 00:02:35,239
早安,貝莉,祝你開學順利喔

47
00:02:35,239 --> 00:02:37,909
真不懂我為何不能搭你們的車去上學

48
00:02:37,909 --> 00:02:41,287
- 我們第一堂是空堂
- 而且你全身帶著廢物的氣息

49
00:02:41,287 --> 00:02:43,664
別聽她們瞎說
你搭共乘車一定會很開心

50
00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:45,291
他會在音樂劇後送你回來嗎?

51
00:02:45,958 --> 00:02:47,919
我已經不參加那個了,很遜

52
00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:52,089
什麼?遜?你那麼有天分
怎麼可以放棄?

53
00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:55,218
記得你扮成史提夫汪達
唱歌給我們聽的那次嗎?

54
00:02:55,218 --> 00:02:57,136
我那時才十歲,那是八百年前的事了

55
00:02:57,136 --> 00:02:59,222
我還記得,他唱得好棒

56
00:02:59,222 --> 00:03:01,015
棒?他超厲害

57
00:03:01,015 --> 00:03:02,391
等等,你跟誰共乘?

58
00:03:03,267 --> 00:03:05,478
學校分配一個學長給我

59
00:03:05,478 --> 00:03:07,396
好像叫亞當盧本斯之類的

60
00:03:09,106 --> 00:03:10,358
- 不會吧
- 盧比?

61
00:03:10,358 --> 00:03:11,692
怎樣?他很酷嗎?

62
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:14,612
不是,他是全校最爛的人

63
00:03:14,612 --> 00:03:15,738
真的嗎?

64
00:03:15,738 --> 00:03:16,739
那傢伙超糟糕

65
00:03:16,739 --> 00:03:18,908
知道我聽起來有什麼感想嗎?

66
00:03:18,908 --> 00:03:20,576
感覺你們剛好可以交個朋友

67
00:03:20,576 --> 00:03:22,078
真湊巧

68
00:03:22,078 --> 00:03:23,329
貝莉,我們走吧

69
00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:26,499
上學要開心喔,我愛你

70
00:03:26,499 --> 00:03:28,960
- 學校見
- 我也愛你,媽

71
00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:31,254
什麼?不跟我說再見?

72
00:03:32,296 --> 00:03:33,881
- 我愛你
- 我也愛你

73
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:35,591
過得開心點,知道嗎?

74
00:03:35,591 --> 00:03:38,678
你做自己就是最酷的事,相信我

75
00:03:38,678 --> 00:03:41,264
你去找同學,看著他的眼睛說

76
00:03:41,264 --> 00:03:43,933
“我叫小班,我想跟你當朋友”

77
00:03:44,934 --> 00:03:46,560
- 好嗎?
- 好

78
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,604
靠眼神交流就能搞定,這就是自信

79
00:03:48,604 --> 00:03:50,273
- 我好愛你
- 我也愛你

80
00:03:50,273 --> 00:03:52,024
- 請放開我,謝謝
- 好

81
00:03:52,024 --> 00:03:55,027
共乘要開心點,記得繫安全帶

82
00:03:55,027 --> 00:03:57,196
時間是你的,好好把握

83
00:04:03,202 --> 00:04:04,537
這傢伙到底在哪?

84
00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:18,467
- 我是小班
- 快點,我們遲到了

85
00:04:29,312 --> 00:04:30,521
拿著

86
00:04:32,815 --> 00:04:33,858
別吃掉

87
00:04:33,858 --> 00:04:34,942
我沒這個打算

88
00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:36,444
你最好別吃

89
00:04:37,278 --> 00:04:38,821
我又不是你的餐車

90
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:47,872
你還好嗎?

91
00:04:49,081 --> 00:04:50,750
亞當?你還在嗎?

92
00:04:52,543 --> 00:04:55,046
綠燈了,快醒醒,綠燈了

93
00:04:55,046 --> 00:04:56,547
他媽的智障

94
00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:58,132
盧比

95
00:04:59,508 --> 00:05:00,509
還我

96
00:05:02,303 --> 00:05:03,304
你偷咬過嗎?

97
00:05:03,304 --> 00:05:04,221
沒有

98
00:05:06,474 --> 00:05:08,476
(校車)

99
00:05:11,729 --> 00:05:14,357
新生坐前面?是誰他媽規定的?

100
00:05:14,357 --> 00:05:16,650
拜託別計較,我都已經想拉肚子了

101
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:19,779
兄弟

102
00:05:20,321 --> 00:05:21,906
那該不會是便當盒吧?

103
00:05:21,906 --> 00:05:23,324
我的便當盒哪裡不好?

104
00:05:23,324 --> 00:05:25,409
你想害死我們嗎?快丟掉

105
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:28,079
等一下,我先看看裡面有什麼

106
00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:30,956
我媽在開學第一天可是不遺餘力

107
00:05:31,499 --> 00:05:32,750
搞屁...

108
00:05:34,752 --> 00:05:36,629
他偷吃我的三明治

109
00:05:36,629 --> 00:05:37,546
誰?

110
00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:40,341
丹尼斯啊,她的白痴男友

111
00:05:40,341 --> 00:05:42,009
你媽還跟那個垃圾在一起?

112
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:44,261
對,而且他害我過得有夠慘

113
00:05:44,261 --> 00:05:47,306
有天晚上,他把我叫醒
竟然是要跟我借保險套

114
00:05:47,306 --> 00:05:49,433
你到底怎麼能忍受那種鳥事?

115
00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:50,935
不然我該怎麼辦?

116
00:05:50,935 --> 00:05:54,605
我哪知道,賞他巴掌啊
拿他牙刷刷屁股,隨便想個辦法

117
00:05:54,605 --> 00:05:57,775
不對,有時就是要以不變應萬變

118
00:05:57,775 --> 00:06:00,486
被畜生襲擊的時候裝死就對了

119
00:06:01,153 --> 00:06:02,863
我不是那種人

120
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:06,325
要是有人不尊重我
我就要讓他知道誰是老大

121
00:06:10,121 --> 00:06:13,541
祝大家開學快樂

122
00:06:13,541 --> 00:06:17,461
陽光明媚,蟲鳴鳥叫,小弟酷炫...

123
00:06:17,461 --> 00:06:19,171
你他媽說什麼?

124
00:06:19,171 --> 00:06:22,007
- 我...
- 你不叫酷炫,那是我的名字

125
00:06:22,508 --> 00:06:25,511
但我們都姓庫軒尼
不能一起用這個暱稱嗎?

126
00:06:25,511 --> 00:06:29,348
弟,你想用酷炫這個品牌
就要有那個資格

127
00:06:30,057 --> 00:06:33,602
要是在你夠格前
再被我聽到有人叫你酷炫,我就扁你

128
00:06:34,186 --> 00:06:36,730
好啦,拜託喔

129
00:06:37,982 --> 00:06:40,818
可以問一下,酷炫是什麼品牌?

130
00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:45,823
超屌傳奇王者啊,弟

131
00:06:45,823 --> 00:06:48,284
屌喔,你是怎麼開始的?

132
00:06:48,284 --> 00:06:50,828
第一堂課鐘聲都還沒響
我就把高四學長的耳朵撕掉

133
00:06:50,828 --> 00:06:54,790
天啊,可以拜託你跟大家說
我是你的超酷小弟嗎?

134
00:06:54,790 --> 00:06:57,626
不行,自己的路要自己走

135
00:06:58,419 --> 00:07:00,254
我是在幫你塑造性格

136
00:07:02,965 --> 00:07:03,841
謝啦

137
00:07:04,341 --> 00:07:08,095
但你要快點成長
這個禮拜就搞定,好嗎?

138
00:07:08,095 --> 00:07:10,848
以免被大家發現你是軟腳蝦

139
00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:16,395
{\an8}(衛蒙高中)

140
00:07:20,983 --> 00:07:22,193
下車

141
00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,153
我們不開進去嗎?

142
00:07:24,153 --> 00:07:27,364
我要開進去
但不要載著廢物菜鳥進去

143
00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,159
我載你只是為了免除留校懲罰而已

144
00:07:30,159 --> 00:07:31,660
快點,我遲到了

145
00:07:36,832 --> 00:07:37,666
乖孩子

146
00:07:46,884 --> 00:07:47,760
娘炮,看路啦

147
00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,637
搞屁啊?

148
00:07:50,930 --> 00:07:52,473
我有種不祥的預感

149
00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:55,768
兩位,準備迎接最美好的歲月了嗎?

150
00:07:55,768 --> 00:07:58,562
應該是殘存的歲月吧
你有看到剛才的鳥事嗎?

151
00:07:58,562 --> 00:08:01,148
忘了吧,等鐘聲一響
我們就是高中生了

152
00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:02,816
- 知道那是什麼意思嗎?
- 新老師

153
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:05,778
- 爸媽期望我們成功的壓力更大?
- 長陰毛?

154
00:08:05,778 --> 00:08:08,572
不是,這就代表全新的開始
凡事都有可能

155
00:08:09,448 --> 00:08:10,491
你們看,酷炫來了

156
00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:24,296
- 一定要跟他混在一起嗎?
- 他是我們的朋友

157
00:08:24,296 --> 00:08:25,256
他是王八蛋

158
00:08:25,256 --> 00:08:28,217
唉呦,這不是老二跟兩顆怪蛋嗎?

159
00:08:28,217 --> 00:08:30,135
- 酷炫
- 酷炫

160
00:08:30,636 --> 00:08:32,429
別忘了,我是說真的

161
00:08:34,223 --> 00:08:35,599
你們以後不能再叫我酷炫了

162
00:08:35,599 --> 00:08:39,270
我哥說我沒爭取到那個資格
他只要聽一次就揍我一拳

163
00:08:39,270 --> 00:08:41,939
- 那我們要怎麼叫你?
- 就叫我本名吧

164
00:08:41,939 --> 00:08:43,023
丹加?

165
00:08:43,023 --> 00:08:44,191
是達納,賤人

166
00:08:47,361 --> 00:08:49,154
你們儘管笑吧,爛人

167
00:08:49,154 --> 00:08:51,657
等你們聽到我有什麼
一定會搶著幫我哈屌

168
00:08:51,657 --> 00:08:53,951
我爸媽這周末要去外地

169
00:08:53,951 --> 00:08:56,412
本大爺要舉辦超屌派對

170
00:08:56,412 --> 00:08:58,372
五桶酒、超屌DJ

171
00:08:58,372 --> 00:09:01,625
男女比超誇張
到時候一定會爽到不能再爽

172
00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:04,086
你要怎麼辦到?
我們是你唯三的朋友耶

173
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:05,879
我哥會幫忙

174
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:08,382
原來是凱王要辦派對啊

175
00:09:08,382 --> 00:09:09,425
是我們倆一起辦

176
00:09:09,425 --> 00:09:12,803
聽起來很可怕
高一真的可以參加嗎?

177
00:09:12,803 --> 00:09:16,515
當然不行,但我是貴賓
你們三個娘炮是我的加一

178
00:09:16,515 --> 00:09:18,183
這樣是加三,你他媽低能啊

179
00:09:18,183 --> 00:09:20,477
加你這個矮冬瓜頂多只能算2.5

180
00:09:21,145 --> 00:09:22,146
去你的

181
00:09:22,646 --> 00:09:25,274
太棒了,我要在那裡跟貝莉告白

182
00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:28,444
拜託,說好的全新開始呢?

183
00:09:28,444 --> 00:09:32,156
貝莉雖然很棒,但她是學姊
你絕對不可能成功

184
00:09:32,156 --> 00:09:35,784
今年暑假發生了一件事
我覺得我很有機會

185
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:40,873
有天晚上我睡不著,就下樓吃點心

186
00:09:41,540 --> 00:09:42,499
你好

187
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:43,542
你上了她?

188
00:09:44,043 --> 00:09:45,586
沒有啦,到底想不想聽我說?

189
00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:48,547
抱歉,我只是有點興奮,繼續說吧

190
00:09:49,256 --> 00:09:51,550
我當時吃了一驚,但還是裝得很淡定

191
00:09:54,053 --> 00:09:56,055
貝莉,你怎麼還沒睡?

192
00:09:56,805 --> 00:10:00,351
你姊打呼聲跟聖伯納犬一樣大聲
她真的應該告她的整形醫生

193
00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:02,561
真的

194
00:10:02,561 --> 00:10:04,313
其實我很愛狗

195
00:10:10,444 --> 00:10:11,278
我能待在這嗎?

196
00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:14,448
這裡是你家,請便

197
00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:20,454
所以我們開始聊天,非常順利

198
00:10:20,454 --> 00:10:24,041
天南地北亂聊,笑笑鬧鬧

199
00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:27,127
我連我說了什麼都不知道
但我狀況超好

200
00:10:27,628 --> 00:10:30,381
其實跟你閒聊
也不至於討厭得要死嘛

201
00:10:31,048 --> 00:10:33,342
那還真...謝謝

202
00:10:33,342 --> 00:10:36,470
不過還是別太公開
在學校不要跟我說話

203
00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:38,055
好...我絕對不會

204
00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:43,435
鬧你的啦,你可以找我搭話
下次找機會一起喝啤酒

205
00:10:43,435 --> 00:10:46,105
我們相處得超融洽

206
00:10:47,189 --> 00:10:48,190
但突然間...

207
00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:55,239
- 好喔,這才像樣嘛
- 靠

208
00:10:55,239 --> 00:10:57,157
故事應該要從這邊開始講才對啊

209
00:10:57,157 --> 00:11:00,577
很好,那接下來呢?
你出招了嗎?你有摸嗎?

210
00:11:02,121 --> 00:11:04,456
- 我僵住了
- 她完全沒發現?

211
00:11:04,456 --> 00:11:05,708
最後還是發現了

212
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:09,962
我從一開始就露點嗎?

213
00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:12,172
誰露點?

214
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:13,382
我露點

215
00:11:15,300 --> 00:11:17,803
- 你可以再說一次嗎?
- 搞屁啊,你幹嘛不提醒我?

216
00:11:17,803 --> 00:11:21,223
對不起,我只是太想繼續聊了

217
00:11:21,223 --> 00:11:23,684
救得漂亮,後來呢?

218
00:11:24,393 --> 00:11:27,312
後來就沒了,她去睡覺了

219
00:11:28,522 --> 00:11:30,691
就這樣?你是在開玩笑吧?

220
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:33,277
等等,我有點搞不懂

221
00:11:33,277 --> 00:11:36,029
這件事為什麼會讓你覺得有機會?

222
00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:37,114
要親身體會才會懂

223
00:11:37,990 --> 00:11:41,285
這是她第一次把我當作男人
成年的男人

224
00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:43,787
一到十分,她的乳頭幾分?

225
00:11:44,663 --> 00:11:45,748
12分

226
00:11:46,957 --> 00:11:48,375
爽啦

227
00:11:58,093 --> 00:12:00,637
哇靠,你看這傢伙

228
00:12:00,637 --> 00:12:02,973
- 喂!小鬼頭
- 叫我嗎?

229
00:12:02,973 --> 00:12:04,725
小弟,你幾歲?

230
00:12:04,725 --> 00:12:06,018
15

231
00:12:06,018 --> 00:12:07,686
屁啦,15個月還15歲?

232
00:12:07,686 --> 00:12:09,438
你看起來超誇張

233
00:12:10,314 --> 00:12:11,899
你從現在起就叫“胎兒”

234
00:12:11,899 --> 00:12:14,067
我覺得不太好耶

235
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,986
我覺得很好,胎兒,滾吧

236
00:12:20,157 --> 00:12:22,326
媽媽咪呀,那傢伙看起來像肉丸一樣

237
00:12:22,326 --> 00:12:24,620
哇靠,喂!你給我過來

238
00:12:24,620 --> 00:12:28,415
幹,完蛋了
我在接下來四年都要叫“胎兒”了

239
00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:32,127
我在同年級裡年紀最大
看起來卻像拇指姑娘一樣

240
00:12:32,127 --> 00:12:33,921
說句實在話,她長得很可愛

241
00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:42,012
那是什麼鬼?

242
00:12:42,012 --> 00:12:45,057
她是卡崔娜奧利安納
全校最屌的妹子

243
00:12:45,057 --> 00:12:46,683
有50萬個粉絲

244
00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:48,435
麥斯索倫的哥哥背著她偷吃

245
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,188
她讓他被排擠到不得不轉學

246
00:12:53,065 --> 00:12:55,275
- 我還沒辦法面對那種人
- 我可以

247
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,568
她會參加我的派對

248
00:12:56,568 --> 00:12:58,320
是你哥的派對

249
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:00,239
閉嘴啦,艾迪,我也是主辦

250
00:13:00,823 --> 00:13:03,033
好,先這樣,我要去上課了

251
00:13:04,368 --> 00:13:06,078
(年度教師保留車位)

252
00:13:08,622 --> 00:13:11,291
普蘭柯!我的拜把兄弟

253
00:13:13,627 --> 00:13:15,003
我是史都貝克

254
00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:17,631
聽著,你上次說我通知得太晚

255
00:13:17,631 --> 00:13:19,925
所以我這次特別提早通知

256
00:13:19,925 --> 00:13:23,011
週五晚上,我家
兄弟打牌夜,來不來?

257
00:13:23,846 --> 00:13:24,680
幹

258
00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:26,431
我就為你改期,就週六吧

259
00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:29,601
就約週六晚上,說定了,我...

260
00:13:32,396 --> 00:13:36,191
坦白告訴你吧,艾莉和我分開了

261
00:13:36,692 --> 00:13:39,611
沒關係,不必道歉,沒事啦

262
00:13:39,611 --> 00:13:44,157
其實分開也好,以後會更好
好,我...你要好好過喔

263
00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:46,702
下次聊,好,再見

264
00:13:54,293 --> 00:13:57,212
莫頓,你還是被老婆吃死死嗎?

265
00:13:59,089 --> 00:14:00,883
抱歉,我以為她好轉了

266
00:14:07,973 --> 00:14:10,809
同學,開始上課吧

267
00:14:10,809 --> 00:14:13,937
我是史都貝克老師,歡迎來上化導

268
00:14:13,937 --> 00:14:17,357
化是化學的簡稱,導是導論的簡稱

269
00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:19,568
你如果現在已經聽不懂
那你就死定了

270
00:14:21,737 --> 00:14:22,571
同學

271
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:24,615
你叫什麼名字?

272
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:27,367
- 小班
- 小班?不是大班?

273
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,578
好,那你要說大聲點,讓大家知道

274
00:14:30,162 --> 00:14:32,664
可以跟我說水的化學式是什麼嗎?

275
00:14:33,332 --> 00:14:34,166
H2O

276
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:36,835
注意,有天才耶

277
00:14:37,419 --> 00:14:39,671
誰可以告訴我

278
00:14:40,172 --> 00:14:43,091
如果我把這個H2O

279
00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:48,555
混合過氧化氫和普通洗碗精
會發生什麼事?

280
00:14:48,555 --> 00:14:50,849
有人知道嗎?沒有?

281
00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,851
看來只好試試看了

282
00:14:52,851 --> 00:14:53,894
小心!

283
00:14:58,315 --> 00:14:59,358
真奇怪

284
00:14:59,942 --> 00:15:03,779
再加點碘化鉀吧,看看會怎麼樣

285
00:15:07,532 --> 00:15:08,367
好喔

286
00:15:08,992 --> 00:15:11,662
聽著,我只要求各位上課要準時

287
00:15:11,662 --> 00:15:12,955
要專心

288
00:15:13,455 --> 00:15:16,208
只要全班平均有B

289
00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,585
我就教你們製造核子彈

290
00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:20,921
開玩笑的啦

291
00:15:20,921 --> 00:15:23,173
但我會教你們做清潔劑炸彈

292
00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:26,301
這樣你們就能炸爛信箱之類的東西

293
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:41,692
停在這是要幹嘛嗎?

294
00:15:42,192 --> 00:15:43,610
我有件事得做

295
00:15:45,112 --> 00:15:45,988
好喔

296
00:15:48,156 --> 00:15:49,866
我有很多功課,所以...

297
00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:51,326
你越快閉嘴

298
00:15:51,326 --> 00:15:53,704
就越快能寫作業

299
00:15:53,704 --> 00:15:55,455
這句話根本沒道理啊

300
00:15:57,207 --> 00:15:58,625
- 閉嘴就對了
- 好

301
00:16:01,503 --> 00:16:02,337
那是什麼?

302
00:16:02,337 --> 00:16:04,715
維他命D,我要賣

303
00:16:04,715 --> 00:16:06,800
不是超市就有在賣嗎?

304
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:09,803
是沒錯,但我跟大家說這是狂喜

305
00:16:09,803 --> 00:16:12,014
- 走吧
- 不要,我不去,這犯法耶

306
00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:15,600
你要賣隨便你,但我還有功課要做...

307
00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:18,395
別再提功課了,知道嗎?

308
00:16:18,395 --> 00:16:21,273
我完全不屌功課,你也知道

309
00:16:21,273 --> 00:16:22,649
我們是共乘夥伴,兄弟

310
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:26,153
我不是要找碴,只是我大概辦不到

311
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:30,782
冷靜就好,知道嗎?

312
00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:32,993
- 深呼吸,一切都會沒事的
- 好

313
00:16:32,993 --> 00:16:34,202
冷靜下來了嗎?

314
00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:37,330
- 好了
- 很好,那你看好了

315
00:16:38,373 --> 00:16:39,875
那是什麼鬼東西?

316
00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:42,961
他媽的電擊棒!亞馬遜什麼都有賣

317
00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:45,338
要是出事,我就電爆這些王八蛋

318
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,256
走吧

319
00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:47,674
不要,我不去

320
00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:54,431
你給我聽好,接下來我們就這麼辦

321
00:16:54,431 --> 00:16:56,016
我數到三

322
00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:58,060
等我數完,你要是還沒下車

323
00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:00,771
我就電你電到你屁股開花

324
00:17:01,563 --> 00:17:02,439
一...

325
00:17:12,282 --> 00:17:15,243
- 這些人都讀哪所學校?
- 他們應該沒上學

326
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,578
我們快點解決,好嗎?

327
00:17:17,079 --> 00:17:19,790
廢話,你以為我想慢慢拖?

328
00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:25,128
貨帶了嗎?

329
00:17:25,128 --> 00:17:28,048
求必有得,要在哪交易?

330
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:30,509
這邊就好,找個人擋一下

331
00:17:30,509 --> 00:17:31,593
擋一下

332
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:39,059
拜託,自然一點啦

333
00:17:41,144 --> 00:17:44,940
好,1顆30,10顆300

334
00:17:44,940 --> 00:17:46,399
這有點太貴吧?

335
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:49,528
一分錢一分貨,這小子可是製藥大師

336
00:17:49,528 --> 00:17:51,655
只用最新鮮的材料

337
00:17:52,155 --> 00:17:53,782
你保證?貨很夠力?

338
00:17:54,783 --> 00:17:57,202
對,產地直送

339
00:17:59,955 --> 00:18:00,789
屌

340
00:18:02,457 --> 00:18:03,875
我先試一下

341
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,003
得小心吩坦尼

342
00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:11,133
他媽的類鴉片氾濫
我表妹就被害死了

343
00:18:11,133 --> 00:18:12,551
- 克莉絲汀娜?
- 對

344
00:18:12,551 --> 00:18:14,636
- 她很正耶
- 什麼?

345
00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:22,310
先等一下,有警察

346
00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:24,521
死條子

347
00:18:25,147 --> 00:18:26,731
對啊,幹他媽的鴿子

348
00:18:27,858 --> 00:18:28,692
對啊

349
00:18:28,692 --> 00:18:30,819
應該要砍爆他們的預算

350
00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:34,197
或至少把預算挪到別的用途

351
00:18:37,284 --> 00:18:41,163
算了,就這樣
要是貨夠好,我們會再找你買

352
00:18:46,501 --> 00:18:47,752
寫作業囉

353
00:18:49,838 --> 00:18:52,174
(衛蒙高中)

354
00:18:58,263 --> 00:19:01,183
謝啦,珍妮
你離婚後氣色好多囉

355
00:19:01,183 --> 00:19:02,642
要繼續保持喔

356
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:06,605
小唐,我看到你在Spotify上關注我

357
00:19:06,605 --> 00:19:09,524
留意我的下一個歌單,一定會大紅

358
00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:11,943
史老師,你今晚要去酷炫的派對嗎?

359
00:19:11,943 --> 00:19:14,654
去幹嘛?看你們划酒拳丟臉嗎?

360
00:19:15,572 --> 00:19:18,617
你一定要來啦
大家看到你一定會很興奮

361
00:19:18,617 --> 00:19:20,994
我絕對不可能去

362
00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:22,454
自己注意安全,好嗎?

363
00:19:22,996 --> 00:19:25,540
吉諾,今天怎麼沒來實驗室?

364
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:28,043
開玩笑的啦,你一定是不得已的

365
00:19:28,043 --> 00:19:30,170
貝卡,短髮俏麗喔

366
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:32,422
- 你在看什麼?
- 妮可的IG

367
00:19:32,422 --> 00:19:34,966
她竟然為了這個普妹甩掉我

368
00:19:34,966 --> 00:19:36,384
她其實人不錯

369
00:19:36,384 --> 00:19:38,637
不好意思喔
我不知道你們原來是炮友

370
00:19:38,637 --> 00:19:40,263
我隨口說說而已

371
00:19:40,263 --> 00:19:42,140
你說實話
大家都在討論我的鼻子嗎?

372
00:19:43,266 --> 00:19:44,809
沒人對我提過

373
00:19:45,310 --> 00:19:47,687
他們絕對注意到了
我能感到那種關注

374
00:19:47,687 --> 00:19:50,774
靠,艾莉莎,你好正喔

375
00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:53,276
- 別看我
- 知道我今晚要辦派對嗎?

376
00:19:53,276 --> 00:19:55,070
我知道你哥要辦派對

377
00:19:55,779 --> 00:19:56,613
是我們倆主辦的

378
00:19:57,906 --> 00:20:00,992
你加我Snapchat吧,以免進不來

379
00:20:00,992 --> 00:20:02,953
我想繼續說了

380
00:20:02,953 --> 00:20:06,873
你們一定要來
我們都上高中了,一起玩一定很棒

381
00:20:06,873 --> 00:20:08,917
好,再看看吧

382
00:20:08,917 --> 00:20:10,543
很好

383
00:20:13,755 --> 00:20:16,341
快滾,不然我就跟貝莉說你沒長陰毛

384
00:20:16,341 --> 00:20:18,176
- 我有陰毛啦
- 噁心

385
00:20:19,594 --> 00:20:21,137
總之,希望晚點再見

386
00:20:27,394 --> 00:20:29,229
你表現得超讚

387
00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:31,815
- 真的嗎?
- 那當然,她很哈你

388
00:20:32,649 --> 00:20:34,442
我覺得我在這場派對很有機會

389
00:20:34,442 --> 00:20:36,861
所有的邂逅元素都湊齊了

390
00:20:37,696 --> 00:20:39,906
- 邂逅是什麼鬼?
- 電影梗

391
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:42,867
命運讓兩個人
以迷人又浪漫的方式偶遇

392
00:20:42,867 --> 00:20:45,161
- 但貝莉早就認識你了
- 她還不認識全新的我

393
00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:47,914
我已經不搞以前喜歡的唱歌和宅事了

394
00:20:47,914 --> 00:20:51,876
每個人都在討論這場派對
聽說可能會有人打架

395
00:20:51,876 --> 00:20:54,713
- 我也有聽說
- 這是我第一次聽說打架的事

396
00:20:54,713 --> 00:20:57,257
會有一堆人打架
我哥都在拳頭纏繃帶了

397
00:20:57,257 --> 00:20:59,259
- 要幹嘛?
- 出拳會比較重?

398
00:20:59,259 --> 00:21:00,510
而且範圍會變大

399
00:21:01,469 --> 00:21:02,554
算了,我不去了

400
00:21:02,554 --> 00:21:06,182
- 你在說什麼?
- 我說我不去了

401
00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:09,561
會有人打架、幹炮、一堆鳥事

402
00:21:09,561 --> 00:21:13,064
太危險了,我辦不到,我不要

403
00:21:13,064 --> 00:21:15,150
其實我也不去了

404
00:21:15,150 --> 00:21:17,861
我正處於“胎兒事件”的引爆點

405
00:21:17,861 --> 00:21:20,488
還是先低調避風頭比較好

406
00:21:20,488 --> 00:21:21,531
胎兒,你好

407
00:21:21,531 --> 00:21:22,449
你們好

408
00:21:23,158 --> 00:21:23,992
幹

409
00:21:23,992 --> 00:21:25,493
搞屁啊?你們不能放我鳥

410
00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:28,705
他說得對,我們是唯一受邀的高一生

411
00:21:29,205 --> 00:21:31,666
立下這種威名能讓我們爽一整年

412
00:21:31,666 --> 00:21:32,876
說不定能爽完整個高中

413
00:21:32,876 --> 00:21:35,837
高中生活會影響我們一輩子

414
00:21:36,421 --> 00:21:38,173
我們有機會能打好第一印象

415
00:21:38,173 --> 00:21:39,674
明晚就是這個機會

416
00:21:39,674 --> 00:21:41,468
你會擺脫那個爛綽號

417
00:21:41,468 --> 00:21:43,219
你以後不會再擔心受怕

418
00:21:43,219 --> 00:21:45,180
你會贏得你哥的敬意

419
00:21:45,180 --> 00:21:47,807
這不只是一場派對,這是我們的未來

420
00:21:48,350 --> 00:21:50,935
- 我得喝酒醉嗎?
- 沒錯

421
00:21:51,936 --> 00:21:53,730
你不想做的事就不用做

422
00:21:55,774 --> 00:22:01,071
好吧,但如果有人叫我胎兒
我就要閃人

423
00:22:01,071 --> 00:22:02,489
胎兒,別這麼激動

424
00:22:04,449 --> 00:22:07,911
大家好,我是酷炫
我想跟你們聊聊近況

425
00:22:07,911 --> 00:22:12,165
高中第一週剛結束
說真的,實在很難熬

426
00:22:12,165 --> 00:22:14,501
幸好我可以在周末補眠

427
00:22:14,501 --> 00:22:16,127
預習作業

428
00:22:16,127 --> 00:22:18,797
而且今晚要辦超屌派對

429
00:22:18,797 --> 00:22:20,090
{\an8}酷炫家

430
00:22:20,090 --> 00:22:21,424
{\an8}學校跟大學都拋在腦後

431
00:22:21,424 --> 00:22:24,094
{\an8}我們要玩翻天、賺大錢

432
00:22:24,094 --> 00:22:25,387
{\an8}大家一起來

433
00:22:25,387 --> 00:22:27,555
{\an8}黑人、白人、亞洲人、變性人

434
00:22:27,555 --> 00:22:28,807
{\an8}我們什麼人都愛

435
00:22:28,807 --> 00:22:32,185
{\an8}除非是醜人,那就別走出家門

436
00:22:32,185 --> 00:22:33,103
{\an8}再見

437
00:22:34,437 --> 00:22:36,022
你確定我們不會太早到嗎?

438
00:22:36,022 --> 00:22:38,858
不會啦,酷炫叫我們參加貴賓趴前趴

439
00:22:39,776 --> 00:22:40,652
是誰?

440
00:22:40,652 --> 00:22:41,861
酷炫

441
00:22:41,861 --> 00:22:42,779
好痛

442
00:22:43,363 --> 00:22:44,364
對不起

443
00:22:45,156 --> 00:22:46,032
達納

444
00:22:46,032 --> 00:22:47,409
從側門進來

445
00:23:01,548 --> 00:23:02,382
你們好

446
00:23:02,382 --> 00:23:04,676
靠,卡崔娜奧利安納也來了

447
00:23:04,676 --> 00:23:07,178
天啊,她好猛喔

448
00:23:08,763 --> 00:23:09,848
我有壞消息

449
00:23:09,848 --> 00:23:12,851
凱王說我只能邀請加一

450
00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:14,894
你是在開玩笑吧?

451
00:23:14,894 --> 00:23:18,857
他說就算沒有你們這些娘炮
這場派對的娘們就夠多了

452
00:23:18,857 --> 00:23:19,983
講完沒?

453
00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:20,984
我正在講啊

454
00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:23,903
對不起,是我的錯

455
00:23:23,903 --> 00:23:27,490
你的錯?你整週都在講“我的派對”

456
00:23:27,490 --> 00:23:29,701
結果連三個加一都帶不進來

457
00:23:30,368 --> 00:23:31,995
幹,我也開始講錯了

458
00:23:31,995 --> 00:23:35,623
各位,不是我要浮誇
但我今晚要是不能跟貝莉在一起

459
00:23:36,708 --> 00:23:37,667
我就要自殺

460
00:23:37,667 --> 00:23:39,002
別這樣

461
00:23:39,002 --> 00:23:41,045
我一定要當加一
這可能是我唯一的機會

462
00:23:41,045 --> 00:23:42,172
拜託,要我怎樣都行

463
00:23:42,172 --> 00:23:44,382
你要就給你啊,其實我鬆了一口氣

464
00:23:45,925 --> 00:23:47,886
話別說得太早,康納?

465
00:23:48,470 --> 00:23:51,139
- 幹嘛?
- 小班說要他怎樣都行

466
00:23:51,139 --> 00:23:52,432
你要加碼嗎?

467
00:23:53,016 --> 00:23:54,225
你去死啦

468
00:23:54,225 --> 00:23:57,061
希望有人溺死在游泳池
把你家告到死

469
00:23:57,061 --> 00:23:58,313
艾迪,我們走

470
00:23:58,855 --> 00:24:00,940
再見,你加油

471
00:24:02,984 --> 00:24:04,277
真慶幸是你

472
00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:06,446
想開開眼界嗎?

473
00:24:07,113 --> 00:24:08,239
- 好啊
- 過來

474
00:24:15,455 --> 00:24:16,498
這是什麼?

475
00:24:17,081 --> 00:24:19,167
你也知道凱王一直在逼我發揮潛力嘛

476
00:24:19,167 --> 00:24:20,793
- 他虐待你
- 那是因為愛

477
00:24:20,793 --> 00:24:23,838
我得幹出一番屌事讓他敬重我

478
00:24:23,838 --> 00:24:26,216
所以我要搞上學姊

479
00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:28,009
不會吧

480
00:24:28,009 --> 00:24:29,385
就是會

481
00:24:29,385 --> 00:24:32,263
你的邂逅點子讓我有了靈感

482
00:24:32,263 --> 00:24:35,225
唯一的問題是太看緣分了

483
00:24:35,225 --> 00:24:36,893
感覺再來會有很不妙的發言

484
00:24:36,893 --> 00:24:39,729
想想吧,電影裡的男生把妹都有戰術

485
00:24:39,729 --> 00:24:42,482
要嘛就偷偷監視
不然就男扮女裝偷挖秘密

486
00:24:42,482 --> 00:24:44,400
我看過六部電影

487
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,946
男方都說服失憶的女方他們是夫妻

488
00:24:47,946 --> 00:24:48,905
隨便啦

489
00:24:49,697 --> 00:24:50,823
解釋一下這是什麼

490
00:24:51,574 --> 00:24:53,618
這就是我排除緣分影響的辦法

491
00:24:53,618 --> 00:24:57,622
我可以在這裡觀察性感學姊
用愛神神箭射中她

492
00:24:57,622 --> 00:24:59,666
說服她跟我在一起

493
00:25:00,250 --> 00:25:02,794
聽起來...很變態

494
00:25:03,836 --> 00:25:06,631
變態?這跟你要做的事一樣
只是手法更高超而已

495
00:25:06,631 --> 00:25:08,466
我和貝莉要做的事跟這完全不一樣

496
00:25:08,466 --> 00:25:09,551
哪裡不一樣?

497
00:25:09,551 --> 00:25:12,804
貝莉和我是知己
你根本還不認識你要的女生

498
00:25:12,804 --> 00:25:15,390
那我先纏著她幾年會比較好囉?

499
00:25:15,390 --> 00:25:17,267
我沒纏著她,我愛她

500
00:25:17,267 --> 00:25:18,643
其實差別不大吧?

501
00:25:18,643 --> 00:25:20,395
我要出去參加派對了

502
00:25:20,395 --> 00:25:22,105
換作是我就不會現在去

503
00:25:22,689 --> 00:25:24,607
出場機會只有一次

504
00:25:24,607 --> 00:25:27,777
你想浪費在還沒幾隻小貓的現在?

505
00:25:30,738 --> 00:25:31,698
好吧

506
00:25:32,532 --> 00:25:33,658
但我不支持你的做法

507
00:25:34,242 --> 00:25:35,201
我無所謂

508
00:25:35,702 --> 00:25:36,578
笑一個

509
00:25:37,078 --> 00:25:39,956
(暴風雨前的寧靜)

510
00:25:39,956 --> 00:25:41,916
真他媽的狗屁

511
00:25:43,167 --> 00:25:46,129
我們應該報警讓他們開不成派對

512
00:25:46,129 --> 00:25:49,382
你幹嘛那麼生氣?
你幾小時前根本一點都不想去

513
00:25:49,382 --> 00:25:52,635
對,但那是我自己決定的
他們沒資格不准我去

514
00:25:52,635 --> 00:25:54,178
只有我能決定

515
00:25:54,178 --> 00:25:55,597
我們今晚來狂歡

516
00:25:55,597 --> 00:25:56,848
狂歡?

517
00:25:56,848 --> 00:26:00,059
你懂我的意思,像是抽菸抽個爽

518
00:26:00,059 --> 00:26:02,562
- 我會過敏
- 總之找點事做

519
00:26:02,562 --> 00:26:06,274
有啊,我們在玩《最後一戰》
吃點肉卷

520
00:26:06,274 --> 00:26:07,567
一定會超爽

521
00:26:08,985 --> 00:26:10,695
你們在這啊

522
00:26:10,695 --> 00:26:14,198
看來你們又要狂歡一晚了

523
00:26:14,198 --> 00:26:16,409
- 丹尼斯,找我有事嗎?
- 沒事

524
00:26:16,409 --> 00:26:19,245
我在等你媽準備出門
今天是她生日

525
00:26:19,245 --> 00:26:21,039
我想對她做點特別的事

526
00:26:21,664 --> 00:26:23,499
可以問你一個問題嗎?

527
00:26:23,499 --> 00:26:27,629
看得出來你在現實生活混得不太好
那也沒關係

528
00:26:27,629 --> 00:26:30,632
但你至少在元宇宙有機會爽吧?

529
00:26:30,632 --> 00:26:33,259
- 那不是...
- 先等一下

530
00:26:34,260 --> 00:26:35,803
- 喂
- 老丹,你好嗎?

531
00:26:35,803 --> 00:26:37,347
兄弟

532
00:26:39,641 --> 00:26:41,976
不行,我今晚不行

533
00:26:42,894 --> 00:26:44,437
我要幫女友慶生

534
00:26:45,438 --> 00:26:47,106
對,有小孩的那個

535
00:26:49,859 --> 00:26:51,986
相信我,他沒那種本領

536
00:26:51,986 --> 00:26:55,657
很好,明天再打給我
我很有興趣,再見

537
00:26:56,532 --> 00:26:58,660
- 他媽的雜碎
- 你們好啊

538
00:26:59,535 --> 00:27:01,412
媽媽,你好美喔

539
00:27:01,412 --> 00:27:04,040
女王,你美若天仙

540
00:27:05,416 --> 00:27:07,627
- 楊阿姨,生日快...
- 等等

541
00:27:09,170 --> 00:27:10,004
好

542
00:27:10,797 --> 00:27:13,007
- 生日快樂
- 謝啦,康納

543
00:27:13,007 --> 00:27:14,050
要去哪慶生嗎?

544
00:27:14,050 --> 00:27:16,219
- 丹尼斯要帶我去吃晚餐
- 高級餐廳

545
00:27:16,219 --> 00:27:19,305
- 然後要去飯店過夜
- 四季飯店

546
00:27:20,264 --> 00:27:21,641
這傢伙懂

547
00:27:23,768 --> 00:27:25,186
該走了,優步到了

548
00:27:25,186 --> 00:27:28,231
烤箱裡有晚餐
有需要就打給我們,注意安全

549
00:27:28,231 --> 00:27:31,442
吃之前記得吹一吹

550
00:27:31,442 --> 00:27:33,653
燙到舌頭就不好了

551
00:27:33,653 --> 00:27:35,613
好了啦,小朋友,晚安囉

552
00:27:35,613 --> 00:27:37,073
小朋友,晚安囉

553
00:27:38,616 --> 00:27:40,118
丹尼斯,像樣一點

554
00:27:41,744 --> 00:27:44,455
看吧,就連你的變態老爸
都覺得我們是娘炮

555
00:27:44,455 --> 00:27:47,041
- 他不是我爸
- 他絕對把你當龜兒子

556
00:27:47,041 --> 00:27:49,210
現在他要去廉價旅館幹你老媽

557
00:27:49,210 --> 00:27:51,796
- 他們要去四季酒店耶
- 隨便啦

558
00:27:51,796 --> 00:27:54,590
每個人都在狂歡幹炮,就我們沒有

559
00:27:55,174 --> 00:27:56,592
從他們不怕丟你一個人在家

560
00:27:56,592 --> 00:27:58,886
就看得出他們多瞧不起你了

561
00:27:58,886 --> 00:28:01,222
- 其實正好相反
- 拜託喔

562
00:28:01,222 --> 00:28:05,017
我們這輩子真的要庸庸碌碌
整天被人趕出派對

563
00:28:05,017 --> 00:28:06,853
老媽還被丹尼斯這種人猛操嗎?

564
00:28:08,312 --> 00:28:11,357
好啦,那你想做什麼?

565
00:28:21,075 --> 00:28:23,453
不行啦,丹尼斯很愛這輛車

566
00:28:24,328 --> 00:28:26,539
你是說幹你媽的丹尼斯嗎?

567
00:28:27,665 --> 00:28:31,794
我們還是抽菸好了
那個主意其實不賴

568
00:28:31,794 --> 00:28:33,004
很好,我們去買菸

569
00:28:34,046 --> 00:28:35,214
上車,我開

570
00:28:39,385 --> 00:28:40,803
這個主意爛透了

571
00:28:40,803 --> 00:28:44,640
別緊張,我有實習駕照
我常常和我媽一起跑腿

572
00:29:03,868 --> 00:29:05,119
下一個換哪個賤人?

573
00:29:05,119 --> 00:29:07,121
你快過來看

574
00:29:07,121 --> 00:29:08,414
卡崔娜醉翻了

575
00:29:08,414 --> 00:29:09,499
不用了

576
00:29:09,499 --> 00:29:11,584
隨便你,真的好酷

577
00:29:11,584 --> 00:29:14,420
一點都不酷,根本是酷的相反

578
00:29:15,296 --> 00:29:16,172
聽著

579
00:29:17,924 --> 00:29:21,093
我知道活在凱王的陰影下很不好受

580
00:29:21,093 --> 00:29:23,805
但我真心相信,你只要做自己

581
00:29:23,805 --> 00:29:25,431
大家就會看出你是多棒的人

582
00:29:27,308 --> 00:29:28,601
做我自己?

583
00:29:28,601 --> 00:29:29,519
對

584
00:29:29,519 --> 00:29:31,437
讓他們認識真正的我?

585
00:29:32,188 --> 00:29:33,022
沒錯

586
00:29:34,232 --> 00:29:36,818
算了吧,絕對沒用,我的計畫好多了

587
00:29:36,818 --> 00:29:38,945
你的計畫很詭異,大概還違法

588
00:29:38,945 --> 00:29:40,029
靠,切到三號鏡頭

589
00:29:40,029 --> 00:29:41,739
你開始懂了喔

590
00:29:42,323 --> 00:29:43,241
貝莉來了

591
00:29:43,950 --> 00:29:45,827
你不覺得她超美嗎?

592
00:29:46,410 --> 00:29:47,328
還可以啦

593
00:29:47,328 --> 00:29:50,331
你姊才是辣到不行

594
00:29:51,916 --> 00:29:54,126
關鍵時刻到了,你來不來?

595
00:29:54,126 --> 00:29:57,713
我再等一下,等待時機成熟

596
00:29:58,381 --> 00:29:59,549
你加油

597
00:30:06,556 --> 00:30:08,850
妮可和那個大頭怪胎在幹嘛?

598
00:30:08,850 --> 00:30:10,726
夠了,你有點可怕

599
00:30:10,726 --> 00:30:14,063
幹嘛?她的頭就真的超大啊

600
00:30:14,647 --> 00:30:15,481
這是事實

601
00:30:16,274 --> 00:30:18,317
不過也不會怎樣
你知道我最重視身體自愛

602
00:30:18,317 --> 00:30:20,444
美貌是男性建構的概念

603
00:30:20,444 --> 00:30:22,446
她說不定是有健康問題

604
00:30:22,446 --> 00:30:24,407
萬一她不是單純長得醜呢?

605
00:30:24,407 --> 00:30:27,743
她穿那什麼鬼衣服?
或許該有人去跟她說說...

606
00:30:35,251 --> 00:30:36,294
給我

607
00:30:38,713 --> 00:30:43,092
- 你沒事吧?
- 沒事,只是盧比在...搞笑而已

608
00:30:43,092 --> 00:30:45,136
共乘的事

609
00:30:45,136 --> 00:30:46,345
對了,你好美

610
00:30:46,345 --> 00:30:47,263
謝謝

611
00:30:47,847 --> 00:30:50,433
第一次參加派對如何?
跟你夢想的一樣嗎?

612
00:30:50,433 --> 00:30:53,686
目前還不錯,人好多,所以很尷尬

613
00:30:53,686 --> 00:30:56,647
現在要更尷尬了
因為你沒人可以聊天

614
00:30:56,647 --> 00:30:57,565
加油

615
00:31:04,572 --> 00:31:05,489
慘了

616
00:31:08,075 --> 00:31:10,494
拜託,你可以直接回家嗎?

617
00:31:11,454 --> 00:31:14,332
快回家,穿上睡衣

618
00:31:14,332 --> 00:31:16,792
叫點外送,然後好好睡個覺

619
00:31:17,585 --> 00:31:20,338
打給你媽,你好幾週沒打給你媽了

620
00:31:20,338 --> 00:31:23,591
趕快離開這裡,其實我...

621
00:31:24,175 --> 00:31:25,593
- 史都貝克老師
- 幹

622
00:31:25,593 --> 00:31:26,510
你好

623
00:31:26,510 --> 00:31:28,346
- 你好嗎?
- 我就覺得是你

624
00:31:28,346 --> 00:31:30,890
我剛好路過這裡...

625
00:31:30,890 --> 00:31:32,975
真不錯,你要進來嗎?

626
00:31:32,975 --> 00:31:34,727
- 不了
- 來嘛,一起玩

627
00:31:34,727 --> 00:31:36,771
沒問題,我就是來玩的

628
00:31:36,771 --> 00:31:38,731
- 好,就這麼辦
- 很好,走吧

629
00:31:38,731 --> 00:31:40,858
- 他媽的
- 你們看

630
00:31:40,858 --> 00:31:43,027
史老師來了耶,你要啤酒嗎?

631
00:31:43,027 --> 00:31:44,236
不要,我還得提早回家

632
00:32:07,301 --> 00:32:09,637
好可憐,他沒朋友

633
00:32:09,637 --> 00:32:11,138
看著吧,我耍耍他

634
00:32:29,115 --> 00:32:31,450
你剛才是叫我過來嗎?

635
00:32:31,450 --> 00:32:32,660
就是...

636
00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:35,246
你有什麼問題?

637
00:32:35,246 --> 00:32:38,457
哪方面?個性上嗎?

638
00:32:38,457 --> 00:32:39,834
你不是艾莉莎的弟弟嗎?

639
00:32:39,834 --> 00:32:41,085
對,我是小班

640
00:32:41,085 --> 00:32:43,963
我和你姊以前一起上體育課
我叫潔西卡

641
00:32:43,963 --> 00:32:46,674
不會吧,你是艾莉莎的弟弟?

642
00:32:46,674 --> 00:32:47,591
對

643
00:32:47,591 --> 00:32:49,760
老弟,你姊的臉是動了什麼手腳?

644
00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:51,721
嘴巴別這麼賤

645
00:32:51,721 --> 00:32:53,222
我很欣賞啊,現在漂亮多了

646
00:32:53,222 --> 00:32:55,850
我不知道,這也輪不到我說嘴

647
00:32:59,311 --> 00:33:00,813
我喜歡這小子,他很講義氣

648
00:33:00,813 --> 00:33:02,106
過來

649
00:33:02,815 --> 00:33:05,609
我們今晚要不要玩到掛?

650
00:33:06,402 --> 00:33:09,572
- 大概要吧
- 別給我這種半吊子的回答

651
00:33:09,572 --> 00:33:12,700
拿出誠意,就是現在,要不要?

652
00:33:17,455 --> 00:33:20,082
- 好,我要
- 他媽的,就這麼辦

653
00:33:20,750 --> 00:33:22,418
你先走,時候到了我再叫你

654
00:33:31,343 --> 00:33:33,763
那個爛人竟然不賣菸給我們

655
00:33:33,763 --> 00:33:35,222
別再想了

656
00:33:35,222 --> 00:33:36,432
那個口味好吃嗎?

657
00:33:38,601 --> 00:33:39,518
超好吃

658
00:33:39,518 --> 00:33:43,397
讚啦,別告訴我,告訴大家啊

659
00:33:44,774 --> 00:33:46,400
快,秀一個給我看看

660
00:33:48,527 --> 00:33:50,154
你的實力絕對不只這樣

661
00:33:54,075 --> 00:33:55,076
就是這樣

662
00:33:55,076 --> 00:33:58,704
讚啦,我們在開電動車

663
00:33:58,704 --> 00:34:00,623
拯救地球,綠能萬歲

664
00:34:00,623 --> 00:34:03,876
綠能萬歲,我們是死忠綠

665
00:34:04,627 --> 00:34:08,464
如果想吃這個巧克力綿綿奧利...

666
00:34:08,464 --> 00:34:09,840
慘了

667
00:34:23,270 --> 00:34:24,980
好,該回家了

668
00:34:25,481 --> 00:34:27,650
不要,我們才剛開始爽耶

669
00:34:28,484 --> 00:34:31,362
知道我們該做什麼嗎?
我們要闖入酷炫的派對

670
00:34:31,946 --> 00:34:34,240
- 絕對不行
- 拜託喔

671
00:34:34,240 --> 00:34:36,826
這樣等我們第一次參加派對

672
00:34:36,826 --> 00:34:38,119
就會先有心理準備

673
00:34:38,119 --> 00:34:39,286
打死都不要

674
00:34:39,286 --> 00:34:41,664
就當作偵察任務吧

675
00:34:42,498 --> 00:34:43,624
就像《最後一戰》一樣

676
00:34:47,294 --> 00:34:49,630
我確實喜歡偵察

677
00:34:50,464 --> 00:34:51,674
我知道你喜歡

678
00:34:52,341 --> 00:34:54,093
好啦,去就去

679
00:34:54,093 --> 00:34:56,637
只能開車經過一下,但要小心

680
00:34:56,637 --> 00:34:58,597
放輕鬆,我來搞定

681
00:35:02,643 --> 00:35:03,894
交給專業的來

682
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:20,161
逮到你了!

683
00:35:22,705 --> 00:35:24,623
我只是鬧你玩的,小帥哥

684
00:35:24,623 --> 00:35:26,667
你有上我的課吧?

685
00:35:26,667 --> 00:35:28,085
有,我是小班

686
00:35:28,085 --> 00:35:30,838
不是大班的小班,沒錯

687
00:35:30,838 --> 00:35:33,048
- 對
- 要我幫你弄一杯嗎?

688
00:35:33,799 --> 00:35:34,717
謝謝老師

689
00:35:34,717 --> 00:35:36,886
高中第一週好玩嗎?

690
00:35:36,886 --> 00:35:38,220
還不錯

691
00:35:38,220 --> 00:35:39,471
目前上的課都喜歡

692
00:35:39,471 --> 00:35:41,223
讚喔

693
00:35:41,849 --> 00:35:44,685
高中最讚,好好享受

694
00:35:47,605 --> 00:35:49,064
幹,真好喝

695
00:35:53,235 --> 00:35:55,070
小班,我來這裡會很奇怪嗎?

696
00:35:55,654 --> 00:35:58,199
史都貝克老師,過來乾一杯烈的

697
00:35:58,199 --> 00:36:01,368
好意我心領了,我等等就要走了

698
00:36:01,368 --> 00:36:02,828
來嘛,一杯就好,就一杯

699
00:36:02,828 --> 00:36:05,164
早死早超生吧,你要來嗎?

700
00:36:05,164 --> 00:36:06,957
- 你去吧
- 確定嗎?

701
00:36:06,957 --> 00:36:08,292
我還得去找個人

702
00:36:09,752 --> 00:36:12,838
很好,去搞定她吧

703
00:36:16,008 --> 00:36:17,051
他們去哪了?

704
00:36:18,761 --> 00:36:19,720
看看是誰來了

705
00:36:19,720 --> 00:36:21,805
- 好了啦
- 哇靠,是我的老師耶

706
00:36:21,805 --> 00:36:23,265
大家好,聽好了

707
00:36:23,265 --> 00:36:26,352
我不想太超過,所以先約法三章

708
00:36:27,311 --> 00:36:28,437
我會喝一杯烈酒

709
00:36:29,021 --> 00:36:34,276
但你們必須一邊聽我上課

710
00:36:34,276 --> 00:36:38,155
可以嗎?配合一下嘛
我是教育家,總得傳道授業,對吧?

711
00:36:38,155 --> 00:36:42,534
很好,漢娜,那瓶151給我

712
00:36:42,534 --> 00:36:47,081
那是什麼?阿瑪雷托?也可以

713
00:36:48,874 --> 00:36:50,501
誰想上化學課?

714
00:37:03,806 --> 00:37:06,308
哇靠

715
00:37:06,308 --> 00:37:08,018
謝天謝地我們沒進去

716
00:37:08,018 --> 00:37:09,853
不會吧

717
00:37:09,853 --> 00:37:10,938
胎兒會開車?

718
00:37:12,231 --> 00:37:13,274
太扯了

719
00:37:13,274 --> 00:37:14,566
你看,是卡崔娜

720
00:37:14,566 --> 00:37:18,404
我要找我的包包,有人偷走了

721
00:37:18,404 --> 00:37:20,281
包包就在你肩膀上,寶貝

722
00:37:21,198 --> 00:37:22,950
- 好痛
- 靠

723
00:37:22,950 --> 00:37:24,243
她的優步呢?

724
00:37:24,243 --> 00:37:27,204
是特斯拉,中產賤人

725
00:37:27,204 --> 00:37:28,247
在那邊

726
00:37:30,708 --> 00:37:32,626
什麼?不要回應她們啦

727
00:37:32,626 --> 00:37:34,503
這樣才有禮貌啊,你看

728
00:37:34,503 --> 00:37:36,672
靠,她們走過來了,怎麼辦?

729
00:37:36,672 --> 00:37:38,007
淡定,快閃

730
00:37:38,007 --> 00:37:40,634
- 這兩件事完全相反吧
- 二選一啊

731
00:37:48,559 --> 00:37:50,811
幹,她要上車了,糟糕

732
00:37:51,562 --> 00:37:53,897
- 慘了
- 再見,愛你哦

733
00:37:54,440 --> 00:37:55,274
我愛她們

734
00:37:58,110 --> 00:37:59,945
有iPhone充電器嗎?

735
00:37:59,945 --> 00:38:01,488
我們不是你的優步

736
00:38:01,989 --> 00:38:03,657
是啦,卡崔娜叫的啊

737
00:38:05,034 --> 00:38:06,327
乾脆直接載她回家吧

738
00:38:06,327 --> 00:38:08,162
我們又不知道她住哪

739
00:38:08,162 --> 00:38:09,413
你住哪?

740
00:38:09,413 --> 00:38:11,707
- 塔可貝爾
- 你才不住塔可貝爾

741
00:38:11,707 --> 00:38:12,624
我就是住那

742
00:38:12,624 --> 00:38:14,668
這輩子都住那

743
00:38:14,668 --> 00:38:17,755
你根本不認識我,你又知道了?

744
00:38:17,755 --> 00:38:21,884
- 什麼?
- 載我回家,不然我就給你一顆星

745
00:38:21,884 --> 00:38:23,469
隨便啊,我又不是優步司機

746
00:38:23,469 --> 00:38:26,221
“我不是你的優步”,少一顆星了

747
00:38:26,221 --> 00:38:27,931
好啦,卡崔娜...

748
00:38:27,931 --> 00:38:30,392
別再聊了,音樂開下去

749
00:38:31,352 --> 00:38:35,022
爽啦,給我錄下來

750
00:38:35,022 --> 00:38:36,648
我要開始了

751
00:38:48,952 --> 00:38:50,162
開車

752
00:38:55,334 --> 00:38:57,294
你看起來有點迷路喔

753
00:38:57,878 --> 00:38:58,962
在你的右邊

754
00:38:59,588 --> 00:39:02,299
抬頭,沒錯

755
00:39:02,299 --> 00:39:03,509
酷炫?

756
00:39:03,509 --> 00:39:05,052
就是本大爺

757
00:39:05,052 --> 00:39:06,387
你偷偷摸摸上來幹嘛?

758
00:39:06,387 --> 00:39:08,806
- 用監視器偷看的人還敢說喔
- 也是

759
00:39:08,806 --> 00:39:11,350
我以為你在找貝莉,不過當我沒說

760
00:39:11,350 --> 00:39:13,602
- 你知道她在哪?
- 廢話,我無所不知

761
00:39:13,602 --> 00:39:16,855
- 我跟上帝一樣,記得嗎?
- 隨便啦,她在哪?

762
00:39:16,855 --> 00:39:19,691
不能跟你說
不然會違反你的道德準則

763
00:39:19,691 --> 00:39:21,110
別這麼機車

764
00:39:21,110 --> 00:39:23,862
好啦,看到左邊的門了嗎?打開

765
00:39:25,322 --> 00:39:26,198
滾啦

766
00:39:26,198 --> 00:39:27,741
是,對不起

767
00:39:29,993 --> 00:39:32,496
你這個王八蛋
你真的知道她在哪嗎?

768
00:39:32,496 --> 00:39:35,416
她剛離開
你快點的話,說不定還能追上她

769
00:39:42,423 --> 00:39:47,344
酒精濃度越高,密度越低
對吧?有道理吧?

770
00:39:47,344 --> 00:39:50,305
所以151會浮在上層

771
00:39:50,305 --> 00:39:53,517
知道151還有哪裡酷嗎?

772
00:39:54,852 --> 00:39:56,812
151超級易燃

773
00:39:58,647 --> 00:40:01,608
熱咖啡,吹熄灌下去

774
00:40:09,324 --> 00:40:11,785
我真的得走了,好嗎?

775
00:40:11,785 --> 00:40:14,455
別這樣,老人的睡覺時間早就到了

776
00:40:14,455 --> 00:40:17,249
你們玩得開心點,注意安全
史老師先閃了

777
00:40:25,549 --> 00:40:26,633
貝莉,等等

778
00:40:26,633 --> 00:40:28,385
- 怎麼了?
- 你要走了?

779
00:40:29,178 --> 00:40:31,597
天啊,你嚇我一跳

780
00:40:31,597 --> 00:40:35,017
抱歉,我剛才有點激動
不過你不能離開

781
00:40:35,017 --> 00:40:36,393
不能?

782
00:40:36,393 --> 00:40:39,813
可以啦,你想做什麼都可以
只是你不該離開

783
00:40:39,813 --> 00:40:40,731
為什麼?

784
00:40:40,731 --> 00:40:43,442
因為你暑假答應過
我們要一起喝啤酒,記得嗎?

785
00:40:44,193 --> 00:40:46,612
記得,你應該會要我履行承諾吧

786
00:40:46,612 --> 00:40:49,698
我只是想說你會想要說到做到

787
00:40:50,449 --> 00:40:51,742
當個講信用的人

788
00:40:52,534 --> 00:40:54,912
我確實很重視信用

789
00:40:54,912 --> 00:40:57,289
我知道,所以我才會追上來

790
00:40:59,208 --> 00:41:01,585
好啊,我還能再喝一杯

791
00:41:07,174 --> 00:41:09,301
邂逅作戰開始

792
00:41:09,927 --> 00:41:12,429
哪位幸運小妞會贏得我的寵幸?

793
00:41:14,515 --> 00:41:16,642
蜜雪兒普拉斯基大變身耶

794
00:41:16,642 --> 00:41:19,895
不過凱王好像跟她有過一腿
他會宰了我

795
00:41:19,895 --> 00:41:21,271
這顆翹臀讚喔

796
00:41:21,271 --> 00:41:24,233
我裝什麼裝?
我哪知道可以拿翹臀幹嘛?

797
00:41:25,192 --> 00:41:28,195
等一下,這個正妹是誰?

798
00:41:28,195 --> 00:41:30,364
未來的紅顏知己,你好啊

799
00:41:31,198 --> 00:41:33,116
等一下,這個混蛋是誰?

800
00:41:33,116 --> 00:41:35,494
不行,寶貝,他不適合你

801
00:41:35,494 --> 00:41:36,745
我來搞定

802
00:41:40,999 --> 00:41:42,459
邂逅時間

803
00:41:45,963 --> 00:41:47,798
- 妮可,你好
- 是你啊

804
00:41:48,382 --> 00:41:49,758
這是幫我拿的嗎?

805
00:41:50,467 --> 00:41:53,845
- 其實是要給...
- 你想到旁邊聊兩句嗎?

806
00:41:53,845 --> 00:41:57,057
我們暑假後好像就沒一起玩了
以前明明就是朋友

807
00:41:57,057 --> 00:42:01,812
我不行,我跟別人說好要幫忙拿酒

808
00:42:01,812 --> 00:42:02,980
幫誰?瓊妮?

809
00:42:02,980 --> 00:42:04,606
對啊

810
00:42:04,606 --> 00:42:05,732
好

811
00:42:05,732 --> 00:42:08,110
聽著,我懂

812
00:42:08,110 --> 00:42:10,696
我今年夏天醜得要...

813
00:42:10,696 --> 00:42:11,780
才不會

814
00:42:11,780 --> 00:42:14,783
明明就會,但沒關係
我已經處理好了

815
00:42:14,783 --> 00:42:17,244
現在我客觀上比她正多了,所以...

816
00:42:17,244 --> 00:42:18,579
不是因為長相

817
00:42:18,579 --> 00:42:21,623
好喔,那是因為什麼?

818
00:42:21,623 --> 00:42:24,376
- 可以不要在這邊吵嗎?
- 快點告訴我啦

819
00:42:24,376 --> 00:42:28,880
好吧,老實說,你很惡毒
你會害別人自卑

820
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:33,176
你外表確實很美,但內在很噁心

821
00:42:35,637 --> 00:42:36,471
艾莉莎,再見

822
00:42:42,853 --> 00:42:45,897
抱歉,我是屋主,有東西要檢查一下

823
00:42:45,897 --> 00:42:46,940
- 真假?
- 不會吧?

824
00:42:46,940 --> 00:42:48,108
可惡

825
00:42:50,319 --> 00:42:51,528
(故障)

826
00:42:51,528 --> 00:42:53,530
不好意思,馬桶壞了

827
00:42:53,530 --> 00:42:56,199
要上就去客房上,或直接尿在樹叢裡

828
00:43:00,912 --> 00:43:01,788
還好嗎?

829
00:43:01,788 --> 00:43:02,748
你說什麼?

830
00:43:02,748 --> 00:43:04,625
我不禁注意到你不太開心

831
00:43:04,625 --> 00:43:05,876
我是這裡的屋主

832
00:43:05,876 --> 00:43:06,835
這是我的派對

833
00:43:06,835 --> 00:43:08,503
我還以為派對是凱王辦的

834
00:43:08,503 --> 00:43:10,756
- 是我們倆一起辦的
- 好喔,我沒事

835
00:43:10,756 --> 00:43:12,716
我只是需要上廁所

836
00:43:12,716 --> 00:43:15,802
或許可以讓你用貴賓廁所

837
00:43:15,802 --> 00:43:18,305
太棒了,我一定會盡快上完

838
00:43:18,889 --> 00:43:19,806
這邊請

839
00:43:26,980 --> 00:43:29,358
吃相也太難看了吧

840
00:43:29,358 --> 00:43:31,902
至少她不會繼續唱饒舌了

841
00:43:31,902 --> 00:43:33,695
喂...注意皮椅套啦

842
00:43:34,905 --> 00:43:36,239
這可不能浪費

843
00:43:39,117 --> 00:43:41,078
看得我好想吐

844
00:43:41,912 --> 00:43:43,288
那不是餐巾紙

845
00:43:44,039 --> 00:43:45,749
搞屁啊?

846
00:43:48,210 --> 00:43:50,754
我看不下去了,快說你住哪

847
00:43:55,467 --> 00:43:56,426
晚安

848
00:43:57,052 --> 00:43:59,680
- 喂...別這樣
- 卡崔娜,快醒醒

849
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:02,015
- 卡崔娜,醒醒
- 你不能睡在這

850
00:44:04,976 --> 00:44:07,979
- 現在怎麼辦?
- 翻她包包,證件上寫什麼?

851
00:44:10,607 --> 00:44:13,068
威瑪大道162號,讚,走吧

852
00:44:20,325 --> 00:44:23,036
重力菸斗這個詞有點誤導

853
00:44:23,036 --> 00:44:26,456
因為我們利用的其實是壓力

854
00:44:26,456 --> 00:44:28,166
我抬起容器的同時

855
00:44:28,166 --> 00:44:31,503
其實是在創造壓力真空

856
00:44:31,503 --> 00:44:34,589
讓擴大的表面區充滿煙霧

857
00:44:34,589 --> 00:44:36,383
看看這有多白

858
00:44:36,383 --> 00:44:38,677
有人終於認真上課了喔

859
00:44:38,677 --> 00:44:40,721
在我下壓的同時

860
00:44:40,721 --> 00:44:44,307
就會快速增加內部壓力

861
00:44:44,307 --> 00:44:48,103
將容器內的煙霧逼出來
灌進我的肺裡

862
00:44:48,103 --> 00:44:49,187
大家準備好了嗎?

863
00:44:49,187 --> 00:44:53,442
大家一起喊,史老師...

864
00:44:53,442 --> 00:44:55,193
開始囉

865
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:03,702
爽

866
00:45:04,911 --> 00:45:06,246
好,下一個換誰?

867
00:45:06,246 --> 00:45:07,664
這邊,換我

868
00:45:07,664 --> 00:45:09,833
好,大家星期一再見

869
00:45:11,334 --> 00:45:12,961
擊掌

870
00:45:16,757 --> 00:45:18,425
感激不盡

871
00:45:18,425 --> 00:45:22,554
- 不好意思還要你下來這裡
- 沒關係,這個地下室很不錯

872
00:45:22,554 --> 00:45:24,473
這裡其實不只是地下室

873
00:45:24,473 --> 00:45:28,018
還有電影室、電玩室
甚至還有水療室

874
00:45:28,018 --> 00:45:29,770
- 是哦
- 想看嗎?

875
00:45:30,937 --> 00:45:32,022
好啊

876
00:45:39,821 --> 00:45:40,781
看來你沒亂說

877
00:45:40,781 --> 00:45:42,783
你家裡竟然有水療室

878
00:45:42,783 --> 00:45:43,784
對啊

879
00:45:43,784 --> 00:45:47,287
我家很注重正念
你一定早就從我的舉止看出端倪了

880
00:45:47,287 --> 00:45:48,580
- 你確實很淡定
- 謝謝

881
00:45:48,580 --> 00:45:49,790
沒錯

882
00:45:49,790 --> 00:45:51,750
好吧,要回去了嗎?

883
00:45:51,750 --> 00:45:53,126
好

884
00:45:55,462 --> 00:45:57,547
真奇怪,反鎖了

885
00:45:57,547 --> 00:45:58,799
你是在開玩笑吧?

886
00:45:59,841 --> 00:46:01,718
別擔心,我打電話叫人

887
00:46:04,221 --> 00:46:05,347
該死,沒訊號

888
00:46:05,347 --> 00:46:06,264
你呢?

889
00:46:07,516 --> 00:46:09,392
- 也沒有
- 可惡

890
00:46:11,353 --> 00:46:13,313
- 好,有別的出口嗎?
- 沒有

891
00:46:13,814 --> 00:46:17,901
1.6公里後,海文赫斯大道左轉

892
00:46:20,821 --> 00:46:22,239
- 拜託喔
- 怎樣?

893
00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:24,658
至少有點水準打開窗戶吧

894
00:46:24,658 --> 00:46:27,077
你在講什麼?我又不臭

895
00:46:30,997 --> 00:46:33,583
搞屁啊?快開窗

896
00:46:39,256 --> 00:46:40,173
那是什麼味道?

897
00:46:40,173 --> 00:46:43,301
不知道,我從沒聞過這種臭味

898
00:46:43,301 --> 00:46:44,261
快想辦法啊

899
00:46:44,261 --> 00:46:45,554
天啊

900
00:46:46,054 --> 00:46:47,264
喂...小姐

901
00:46:47,264 --> 00:46:49,224
你差不多就好了喔

902
00:46:50,976 --> 00:46:53,770
死定,她拉屎了

903
00:46:53,770 --> 00:46:54,896
- 什麼?
- 屎定了

904
00:46:54,896 --> 00:46:56,982
她拉屎了,屎定了

905
00:46:56,982 --> 00:46:58,316
你說她拉屎是什麼意思

906
00:46:58,316 --> 00:47:02,445
就是屎現在從她肛門拉出來了

907
00:47:03,572 --> 00:47:04,906
沾到我的我手了

908
00:47:04,906 --> 00:47:06,533
我的手上有屎

909
00:47:07,284 --> 00:47:09,828
搞屁啊?別抹在我身上

910
00:47:34,561 --> 00:47:36,271
好噁,快點幫我弄掉

911
00:47:37,105 --> 00:47:39,649
跑到我嘴巴裡了,我嘴裡有屎

912
00:47:40,650 --> 00:47:41,985
她為什麼要這樣?

913
00:47:43,820 --> 00:47:46,406
想聽好消息還壞消息?

914
00:47:46,406 --> 00:47:47,407
還有壞消息?

915
00:47:47,407 --> 00:47:50,285
壞消息就是我們只有這些草莓能吃

916
00:47:50,785 --> 00:47:53,371
好消息是這些草莓
看起來很熟很好吃

917
00:47:53,371 --> 00:47:55,916
而且我還找到一瓶很讚的香檳

918
00:47:55,916 --> 00:47:58,543
這樣應該是兩個好消息

919
00:47:59,461 --> 00:48:02,714
你常被按摩嗎?

920
00:48:02,714 --> 00:48:06,301
其實我比較喜歡幫人按摩
所以才會去考按摩執照

921
00:48:06,301 --> 00:48:08,762
你要的話,我可以幫你按個腳底按摩

922
00:48:09,596 --> 00:48:10,931
不必這麼客氣啦

923
00:48:10,931 --> 00:48:11,848
你在開玩笑嗎?

924
00:48:11,848 --> 00:48:13,391
我都造成你這麼大麻煩了

925
00:48:13,391 --> 00:48:15,143
你真的會按嗎?

926
00:48:15,143 --> 00:48:17,938
我知道脊椎狹窄症不是鬧著玩的

927
00:48:19,189 --> 00:48:21,441
拜託嘛,讓我減輕一點罪惡感

928
00:48:22,734 --> 00:48:26,112
好吧,按就按,反正是免費的

929
00:48:26,112 --> 00:48:27,322
這才上道

930
00:48:27,322 --> 00:48:29,324
我先去洗手,等等你先趴著

931
00:48:43,254 --> 00:48:45,632
- 這杯啤酒給你
- 謝謝

932
00:48:53,556 --> 00:48:56,476
- 我愛這首歌
- 是哦,想唱嗎?

933
00:48:57,394 --> 00:48:58,395
真好笑喔

934
00:48:58,395 --> 00:49:00,230
唱嘛,分享一下你的才藝

935
00:49:00,730 --> 00:49:02,232
不好意思,麻煩注意這邊

936
00:49:02,232 --> 00:49:05,235
- 別這麼機車,拜託
- 好啦,誇張耶

937
00:49:05,235 --> 00:49:07,946
被發現你真實的一面就不好了

938
00:49:07,946 --> 00:49:11,074
對不起,我只是...現在不太想唱歌

939
00:49:11,658 --> 00:49:14,577
瞭解,酷哥不唱歌

940
00:49:15,662 --> 00:49:18,456
高中第一週順利嗎?
有遇到喜歡的女生嗎?

941
00:49:18,456 --> 00:49:19,833
- 還沒
- 真的假的?

942
00:49:19,833 --> 00:49:22,877
你這麼帥耶,在拖什麼?

943
00:49:24,129 --> 00:49:25,672
我有個喜歡的女生

944
00:49:26,339 --> 00:49:28,341
聽起來很認真,她是怎麼樣的人?

945
00:49:28,341 --> 00:49:31,636
她很酷,又很聰明

946
00:49:31,636 --> 00:49:32,804
又酷又聰明?

947
00:49:32,804 --> 00:49:34,347
很難相信吧?

948
00:49:35,348 --> 00:49:36,391
那你還在等什麼?

949
00:49:37,684 --> 00:49:38,727
趕快行動

950
00:49:40,395 --> 00:49:41,521
萬一她沒興趣怎麼辦?

951
00:49:43,732 --> 00:49:44,649
萬一她有呢?

952
00:49:49,070 --> 00:49:49,946
嚇死我

953
00:49:50,780 --> 00:49:52,782
沒事沒事

954
00:49:52,782 --> 00:49:57,871
這只是化學反應而已
知道為什麼嗎?因為這是科學

955
00:50:01,541 --> 00:50:03,209
各位弟弟妹妹,靠過來

956
00:50:03,209 --> 00:50:10,008
過來見識超屌的噴火龍人

957
00:50:13,762 --> 00:50:14,846
幹

958
00:50:15,638 --> 00:50:18,266
好燙,越來越燙了

959
00:50:20,101 --> 00:50:21,436
沒事

960
00:50:24,689 --> 00:50:28,526
救救我,我是你們的老師啊
拜託喔,救命啊

961
00:50:53,676 --> 00:50:59,933
史老師...

962
00:51:08,775 --> 00:51:10,235
丹尼斯一定會宰了我

963
00:51:10,235 --> 00:51:12,195
我管丹尼斯去死,他不會發現啦

964
00:51:12,695 --> 00:51:16,533
你瘋了嗎?
車裡看起來跟巧克力拉稀工廠一樣

965
00:51:16,533 --> 00:51:21,162
聽著,我們回你家上床睡覺
當作這件事從未發生過

966
00:51:21,162 --> 00:51:23,832
什麼?那車怎麼辦?

967
00:51:23,832 --> 00:51:26,417
什麼車?我聽不懂你在說什麼

968
00:51:26,417 --> 00:51:29,546
那卡崔娜呢?
怎麼可以把她這個屎人丟在路邊?

969
00:51:29,546 --> 00:51:30,547
為什麼不行?

970
00:51:30,547 --> 00:51:33,133
因為她可能會被變態強暴犯抓走

971
00:51:33,133 --> 00:51:35,927
她全身沾滿大便,這跟防護罩一樣

972
00:51:36,594 --> 00:51:39,806
聽著,遲早會有警車巡邏經過

973
00:51:39,806 --> 00:51:41,850
就會以為是她偷車,隨手棄置路邊

974
00:51:41,850 --> 00:51:44,102
那等她清醒說出真相又怎麼辦?

975
00:51:46,855 --> 00:51:49,482
卡崔娜,醒醒

976
00:51:50,108 --> 00:51:51,359
你認識我們嗎?

977
00:51:51,359 --> 00:51:53,444
賤人,滾出我的房間

978
00:51:53,444 --> 00:51:55,905
- 她絕對當不了關鍵證人
- 不重要

979
00:51:55,905 --> 00:51:59,450
警方會追查信用卡到塔可貝爾
然後再調出監視錄影

980
00:51:59,450 --> 00:52:01,995
這是在演《CSI大便現場》嗎?

981
00:52:01,995 --> 00:52:03,621
你的辦法絕對行不通

982
00:52:07,125 --> 00:52:08,793
好啦

983
00:52:10,712 --> 00:52:11,629
新計畫

984
00:52:12,213 --> 00:52:14,382
(安全棄嬰點)

985
00:52:21,806 --> 00:52:24,017
很好,做得好,閃人吧

986
00:52:25,894 --> 00:52:26,728
怎麼了?

987
00:52:28,605 --> 00:52:29,689
這樣感覺大有問題

988
00:52:30,273 --> 00:52:32,483
這就叫報應不爽,也不香

989
00:52:32,483 --> 00:52:34,360
我們不能把她這樣丟在這

990
00:52:34,360 --> 00:52:37,113
內褲裡面還灌滿稀屎

991
00:52:37,113 --> 00:52:40,074
他們是美國英雄
處理這種人是他們的專業

992
00:52:40,074 --> 00:52:42,076
到時候她爸媽就得來接她

993
00:52:42,076 --> 00:52:45,455
很好啊,這樣他們或許終於會有動力
教她該怎麼便便了

994
00:52:46,456 --> 00:52:47,749
快,抓住她的腿

995
00:52:47,749 --> 00:52:50,460
- 我才剛洗手耶
- 快點抓好啦

996
00:53:03,890 --> 00:53:04,724
差一點

997
00:53:06,392 --> 00:53:08,811
所以你真的不唱歌了?

998
00:53:09,854 --> 00:53:12,023
對啊,我沒興趣了

999
00:53:12,023 --> 00:53:13,483
太可惜了

1000
00:53:14,317 --> 00:53:16,486
先聲明,我一直都覺得你有天籟之音

1001
00:53:16,486 --> 00:53:17,779
柯比神射

1002
00:53:18,363 --> 00:53:20,615
- 你為什麼會這麼強?
- 你為什麼會那麼爛?

1003
00:53:20,615 --> 00:53:22,325
我哪知道,我就是爛

1004
00:53:22,325 --> 00:53:23,660
終於找到你了

1005
00:53:23,660 --> 00:53:25,870
- 滑板公園的傢伙來了
- 他們在這?

1006
00:53:25,870 --> 00:53:27,914
對,他們大概會宰掉我們
所以該閃人了

1007
00:53:27,914 --> 00:53:28,831
你好嗎?

1008
00:53:28,831 --> 00:53:30,625
- 我就說會這樣吧
- 怎麼了?

1009
00:53:30,625 --> 00:53:32,752
我們之前騙了一些傢伙的錢

1010
00:53:32,752 --> 00:53:33,962
錢是你騙的

1011
00:53:33,962 --> 00:53:37,507
小班!我們是同伴耶
應該要同甘共苦啊

1012
00:53:37,507 --> 00:53:38,883
找到那些王八蛋了

1013
00:53:39,968 --> 00:53:41,803
你們好

1014
00:53:41,803 --> 00:53:43,346
- 近來好嗎?
- 給我閉上鳥嘴

1015
00:53:43,346 --> 00:53:45,473
- 好
- 你以為賣我們假貨沒關係嗎?

1016
00:53:45,473 --> 00:53:48,142
假貨?你們一定是誤會了吧

1017
00:53:48,142 --> 00:53:49,102
要解釋就快說

1018
00:53:49,102 --> 00:53:50,478
貨是小班給我的

1019
00:53:52,563 --> 00:53:55,108
- 這件事跟我無關
- 他跟我說貨很讚

1020
00:53:55,108 --> 00:53:56,484
盧比,你別鬧了

1021
00:53:56,484 --> 00:54:00,321
這麼說來,我兩小時前才嗑一顆

1022
00:54:00,321 --> 00:54:02,573
現在也是什麼狗屁感覺都沒有

1023
00:54:02,573 --> 00:54:05,451
鬼扯,我根本不想下車
是他逼我的,他在說謊

1024
00:54:05,451 --> 00:54:08,663
得了吧,班傑明,真相已經曝光了

1025
00:54:09,163 --> 00:54:11,833
把錢還他們,乖乖挨揍

1026
00:54:11,833 --> 00:54:13,960
從錯誤中記取教訓

1027
00:54:14,752 --> 00:54:17,755
下手不要太重,他只是個孩子

1028
00:54:18,965 --> 00:54:20,091
天啊

1029
00:54:24,554 --> 00:54:26,931
我不知道到底是怎樣
但我發誓一定會還你們錢

1030
00:54:26,931 --> 00:54:29,267
不用,已經太遲了

1031
00:54:29,267 --> 00:54:31,519
拜託,我是好人

1032
00:54:31,519 --> 00:54:33,730
- 靠,是凱王
- 有什麼問題嗎?

1033
00:54:33,730 --> 00:54:37,317
有,問題可大了,你兄弟騙我們錢

1034
00:54:38,484 --> 00:54:39,319
你說這個賤人?

1035
00:54:42,155 --> 00:54:43,364
他不是我兄弟

1036
00:54:43,364 --> 00:54:44,407
是哦

1037
00:54:44,407 --> 00:54:47,744
有人欠我們三百元

1038
00:54:47,744 --> 00:54:49,245
不關我的事

1039
00:54:49,746 --> 00:54:53,249
我的事是辦這場派對
讓所有客人玩得開心

1040
00:54:53,249 --> 00:54:55,084
你可以選擇給我一點面子

1041
00:54:55,084 --> 00:54:57,879
不然我也可以當這些人的面把你幹爆

1042
00:55:00,631 --> 00:55:02,383
場面要難看了

1043
00:55:07,180 --> 00:55:09,640
好,我給你面子

1044
00:55:12,226 --> 00:55:14,145
謝謝你這麼成熟

1045
00:55:15,897 --> 00:55:17,565
- 你很懂事嘛
- 謝謝稱讚

1046
00:55:17,565 --> 00:55:21,361
這樣好了,我很滿意
你們也來喝一杯吧

1047
00:55:21,361 --> 00:55:22,779
玩得開心點

1048
00:55:22,779 --> 00:55:24,781
有什麼需要就來找我

1049
00:55:33,247 --> 00:55:34,165
天啊

1050
00:55:46,969 --> 00:55:47,804
快走

1051
00:55:53,893 --> 00:55:56,604
- 你打斷了我的鼻子
- 天啊,真的很抱歉

1052
00:55:58,147 --> 00:55:59,190
去你的

1053
00:56:09,242 --> 00:56:11,202
到底是在搞什麼鬼?

1054
00:56:11,202 --> 00:56:12,912
- 什麼?
- 你還在狀況外?

1055
00:56:12,912 --> 00:56:16,582
- 我還以為你要被宰了
- 他媽的盧比,我...

1056
00:56:20,128 --> 00:56:21,754
天啊,這...

1057
00:56:22,463 --> 00:56:23,673
謝謝?

1058
00:56:23,673 --> 00:56:27,301
不客氣,反正你根本不可能主動

1059
00:56:27,301 --> 00:56:30,138
對不起,我只是不知道你怎麼想

1060
00:56:30,805 --> 00:56:33,558
現在你知道了,所以下次別想太多

1061
00:56:33,558 --> 00:56:34,684
好,下次一定不會

1062
00:56:38,396 --> 00:56:40,898
現在就是下次

1063
00:56:40,898 --> 00:56:41,941
是

1064
00:56:43,443 --> 00:56:44,444
我來了

1065
00:56:55,413 --> 00:56:56,456
還可以嗎?

1066
00:56:57,165 --> 00:57:00,460
其實意外的還蠻不錯的

1067
00:57:03,254 --> 00:57:05,548
- 別告訴你姊
- 我一句話都不會跟她說

1068
00:57:05,548 --> 00:57:08,759
我是說真的,不然我就揍死你
要是被別人發現,對我可不太好

1069
00:57:09,635 --> 00:57:10,720
謝謝喔

1070
00:57:10,720 --> 00:57:11,721
別誤會

1071
00:57:11,721 --> 00:57:15,850
雖然你很帥
但是你高一,我高二

1072
00:57:15,850 --> 00:57:17,268
這個差距大到無法跨越

1073
00:57:17,268 --> 00:57:19,937
好,但你也要保證不能告訴別人

1074
00:57:19,937 --> 00:57:21,606
真的假的?為什麼?

1075
00:57:21,606 --> 00:57:25,151
因為我是高一新生
想多找幾個對象嘛

1076
00:57:25,151 --> 00:57:26,944
是喔,真的嗎?

1077
00:57:28,321 --> 00:57:30,281
假的

1078
00:57:39,832 --> 00:57:41,417
我該回去了

1079
00:57:41,417 --> 00:57:44,003
以免有人以為我躲在哪幫你吹

1080
00:57:46,339 --> 00:57:47,215
做夢都不可能

1081
00:57:47,215 --> 00:57:48,633
我根本不想被吹

1082
00:57:49,634 --> 00:57:50,885
我不是那個...

1083
00:57:50,885 --> 00:57:54,305
當然如果你想要,我一定會允許

1084
00:57:54,847 --> 00:57:56,140
聽起來怪怪的

1085
00:57:56,140 --> 00:57:59,435
你不需要我的允許,想做什麼都行

1086
00:58:00,686 --> 00:58:01,729
我支持女性

1087
00:58:03,606 --> 00:58:06,067
要走之前來找我
我說不定會給你搭個便車

1088
00:58:09,737 --> 00:58:11,072
這還真有趣

1089
00:58:21,249 --> 00:58:22,833
靠,他還活著

1090
00:58:22,833 --> 00:58:24,627
天啊

1091
00:58:24,627 --> 00:58:28,089
兄弟,謝謝你
打這一架正是我最需要的

1092
00:58:28,089 --> 00:58:30,299
- 你看,我應該纏起來才對
- 天啊

1093
00:58:30,299 --> 00:58:32,009
- 拳頭都砸爛了
- 對啊

1094
00:58:32,009 --> 00:58:33,678
我愛你,小子

1095
00:58:34,262 --> 00:58:36,097
沒事了,我們不打不相識

1096
01:00:40,012 --> 01:00:41,097
史老師

1097
01:00:41,597 --> 01:00:42,723
星期一再見

1098
01:00:43,724 --> 01:00:45,059
好,按完了

1099
01:00:45,768 --> 01:00:48,562
明天可能會有點痠痛,不過不用擔心

1100
01:00:48,562 --> 01:00:49,689
只是身體在排毒而已

1101
01:00:49,689 --> 01:00:53,651
你想要的話
泡個熱水澡可以加速代謝

1102
01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:56,445
我沒帶泳裝,所以...

1103
01:00:56,445 --> 01:00:58,656
更衣室裡有超多泳裝

1104
01:01:00,783 --> 01:01:02,076
你也要泡嗎?

1105
01:01:02,952 --> 01:01:03,869
進浴缸泡?

1106
01:01:03,869 --> 01:01:05,871
我總不能自己泡吧?

1107
01:01:05,871 --> 01:01:07,415
也不是不行啦

1108
01:01:07,915 --> 01:01:10,376
你先去更衣,我來做準備

1109
01:01:12,628 --> 01:01:14,755
就在那邊,想穿哪件都行

1110
01:01:14,755 --> 01:01:15,840
好

1111
01:01:17,341 --> 01:01:20,052
爽!有搞頭啦

1112
01:01:31,021 --> 01:01:32,022
我好嗨

1113
01:01:35,484 --> 01:01:38,904
他終於出現了!
我最想找的人!抱一個

1114
01:01:39,488 --> 01:01:41,866
我問你一件事,你喜歡爵士嗎?

1115
01:01:41,866 --> 01:01:43,367
喜歡啊

1116
01:01:43,367 --> 01:01:46,829
那還用說,小渾球
我有個東西要給你

1117
01:01:49,582 --> 01:01:50,583
天啊

1118
01:01:51,375 --> 01:01:52,626
你怎麼了?

1119
01:01:53,127 --> 01:01:55,504
這個啊,我有個哥哥嘛,所以囉

1120
01:01:57,256 --> 01:01:58,966
差點忘記香檳了

1121
01:02:03,179 --> 01:02:05,890
喝泡泡飲配泡泡浴

1122
01:02:07,224 --> 01:02:08,934
靠,你還好吧?

1123
01:02:08,934 --> 01:02:09,935
要死了

1124
01:02:09,935 --> 01:02:12,188
天啊,你的肩膀

1125
01:02:12,188 --> 01:02:14,607
- 這是什麼?
- 天啊,好像是你的骨頭

1126
01:02:15,524 --> 01:02:16,442
天啊

1127
01:02:16,984 --> 01:02:18,569
還愣在那,快找人幫忙啊

1128
01:02:18,569 --> 01:02:20,196
怎麼找?我們被反鎖耶

1129
01:02:22,031 --> 01:02:23,324
我有鑰匙

1130
01:02:24,909 --> 01:02:26,535
- 什麼?
- 在我的褲子裡!

1131
01:02:27,161 --> 01:02:28,954
- 他媽的
- 快啊

1132
01:02:32,124 --> 01:02:34,251
你從頭到尾都藏著鑰匙?

1133
01:02:34,251 --> 01:02:36,879
我藏多久有差嗎?我他媽都快死了

1134
01:02:36,879 --> 01:02:39,048
死變態!你有什麼毛病?

1135
01:02:39,048 --> 01:02:41,759
不知道啦!我很自卑

1136
01:02:41,759 --> 01:02:43,594
我想得到我哥的讚許

1137
01:02:43,594 --> 01:02:46,931
我知道我是垃圾,但也罪不致死啊

1138
01:02:49,099 --> 01:02:50,017
拜託啦

1139
01:02:50,017 --> 01:02:52,019
幫我叫救護車

1140
01:02:52,019 --> 01:02:54,104
要叫你自己叫,混蛋

1141
01:02:59,819 --> 01:03:01,695
看看是誰來啦

1142
01:03:02,863 --> 01:03:06,200
有人切了點爵士粉
看來我們只好吸一口了

1143
01:03:06,784 --> 01:03:10,788
不用...我喝啤酒就好
這份好意我心領了

1144
01:03:10,788 --> 01:03:12,706
什麼?你在講什麼?

1145
01:03:12,706 --> 01:03:14,792
你自己答應過的

1146
01:03:15,584 --> 01:03:17,127
你說話不算話嗎?

1147
01:03:17,127 --> 01:03:18,295
- 快嘛
- 快嘛

1148
01:03:18,295 --> 01:03:19,463
吸啦

1149
01:03:20,506 --> 01:03:23,259
小班...

1150
01:03:23,259 --> 01:03:25,302
- 好啦,豁出去了
- 這樣才乖嘛

1151
01:03:25,302 --> 01:03:27,680
你們也聽到了,給他來一條大的

1152
01:03:28,222 --> 01:03:30,391
不用...小條的就夠了

1153
01:03:30,391 --> 01:03:31,809
直接吸進去嗎?

1154
01:03:32,977 --> 01:03:34,937
等一下,這是你的第一次?

1155
01:03:35,604 --> 01:03:36,939
天啊

1156
01:03:36,939 --> 01:03:39,984
那好,我們得來點特別的

1157
01:03:40,526 --> 01:03:43,445
快,給我一張百元鈔票

1158
01:03:43,445 --> 01:03:46,991
乾脆給我來張金碟好了,誰有?

1159
01:03:46,991 --> 01:03:50,035
應該讓他在潔西卡身上吸
她覺得他很帥

1160
01:03:50,536 --> 01:03:52,788
好主意,潔西卡給我滾過來

1161
01:03:52,788 --> 01:03:55,374
不用,潔西卡,你沒必要這麼做

1162
01:03:55,374 --> 01:03:58,335
這也沒什麼,你要的話我可以

1163
01:03:59,753 --> 01:04:02,923
該實現夢想了

1164
01:04:06,468 --> 01:04:08,095
天啊,好好玩喔

1165
01:04:08,095 --> 01:04:09,680
別害羞

1166
01:04:11,015 --> 01:04:15,311
帥喔,你已經不是小屁孩了
快上,這貨很讚

1167
01:04:18,564 --> 01:04:20,024
天啊,好痛

1168
01:04:21,901 --> 01:04:23,319
- 貝莉
- 還真不錯

1169
01:04:24,445 --> 01:04:25,279
別走

1170
01:04:25,946 --> 01:04:28,157
靠!幹!

1171
01:04:28,157 --> 01:04:30,242
這下麻煩了,幹...

1172
01:04:30,242 --> 01:04:33,746
別激動,小弟,深呼吸

1173
01:04:33,746 --> 01:04:35,915
對不起,我沒吸過古柯鹼

1174
01:04:36,999 --> 01:04:38,042
他以為是古柯鹼

1175
01:04:38,834 --> 01:04:40,502
你現在也還沒破戒啦

1176
01:04:41,629 --> 01:04:42,463
什麼?

1177
01:04:43,130 --> 01:04:44,757
那是K,小弟

1178
01:04:44,757 --> 01:04:45,799
K?

1179
01:04:45,799 --> 01:04:50,429
K他命,好像是貓還是馬在用的

1180
01:04:50,429 --> 01:04:51,347
靠,我忘了

1181
01:04:51,347 --> 01:04:52,932
天啊,我要死了

1182
01:04:53,474 --> 01:04:56,101
別激動

1183
01:04:56,894 --> 01:05:01,190
坐下,放鬆隨波浪衝回岸上

1184
01:05:24,380 --> 01:05:25,756
快走

1185
01:05:26,715 --> 01:05:28,550
快,動起來

1186
01:05:30,302 --> 01:05:31,679
快,全部出來

1187
01:05:31,679 --> 01:05:34,974
該回家了,派對結束了

1188
01:05:35,766 --> 01:05:38,018
拜託喔

1189
01:05:48,237 --> 01:05:49,071
艾莉莎?

1190
01:05:51,407 --> 01:05:52,825
- 見鬼了
- 我知道

1191
01:05:52,825 --> 01:05:54,910
我是怪物

1192
01:05:56,078 --> 01:05:57,621
裡外都是

1193
01:06:07,840 --> 01:06:10,926
我們也算同病相憐
我的鎖骨斷成三截了

1194
01:06:11,510 --> 01:06:12,553
你一定是罪有應得

1195
01:06:12,553 --> 01:06:13,887
那還用說

1196
01:06:14,596 --> 01:06:15,723
這還算走運了

1197
01:06:19,393 --> 01:06:20,436
想聊聊嗎?

1198
01:06:22,855 --> 01:06:24,565
沒什麼好聊的

1199
01:06:26,859 --> 01:06:28,152
妮可說得對

1200
01:06:30,112 --> 01:06:34,742
我外表如何根本不重要
因為我的內心就是一坨狗屎

1201
01:06:35,743 --> 01:06:36,660
沒這回事

1202
01:06:36,660 --> 01:06:41,206
你超性感,聞起來又香
那顆屁股跟核桃一樣

1203
01:06:41,206 --> 01:06:44,918
你搞屁啊?誰他媽會講這種話?

1204
01:06:44,918 --> 01:06:49,006
對不起,我正在改進,但要一點時間

1205
01:06:50,591 --> 01:06:53,594
我要說的是,你本來就很好了

1206
01:06:58,390 --> 01:07:01,101
你不覺得我是死賤人?

1207
01:07:01,101 --> 01:07:02,686
你當然賤到不行

1208
01:07:03,437 --> 01:07:05,189
但這正是你的優點

1209
01:07:07,107 --> 01:07:07,941
聽著

1210
01:07:08,692 --> 01:07:11,153
我不蠢,我知道自己是爛人

1211
01:07:12,279 --> 01:07:16,700
大家之所以容忍我
只是因為我爸媽很有錢

1212
01:07:16,700 --> 01:07:18,577
而且我超會辦派對

1213
01:07:18,577 --> 01:07:19,787
是你哥很會

1214
01:07:20,412 --> 01:07:22,414
是我跟他合作一起辦的

1215
01:07:23,290 --> 01:07:25,876
但你每次都對我直言不諱
什麼都不管

1216
01:07:25,876 --> 01:07:29,671
你毫不修飾、真實、狂野

1217
01:07:30,297 --> 01:07:33,967
如果妮可受不了,那是她配不上你

1218
01:07:37,805 --> 01:07:38,680
謝謝

1219
01:07:41,266 --> 01:07:42,184
這番話真貼心

1220
01:07:42,810 --> 01:07:43,894
這是實話

1221
01:07:49,358 --> 01:07:50,192
等等

1222
01:07:51,527 --> 01:07:52,653
這是邂逅嗎?

1223
01:07:52,653 --> 01:07:54,279
你想都別想

1224
01:07:54,279 --> 01:07:55,239
也是啦

1225
01:08:01,829 --> 01:08:03,622
我都認不出你們是誰家小孩了

1226
01:08:05,249 --> 01:08:06,959
K他命是什麼鬼東西?

1227
01:08:06,959 --> 01:08:10,254
(毒品)

1228
01:08:11,046 --> 01:08:12,256
不知道?不確定?

1229
01:08:12,840 --> 01:08:14,883
- 好像是給貓用的東西
- 大聲點

1230
01:08:14,883 --> 01:08:16,510
好像是給貓用的東西

1231
01:08:18,595 --> 01:08:20,848
給貓用的東西

1232
01:08:20,848 --> 01:08:23,100
那還真是好棒棒喔

1233
01:08:23,100 --> 01:08:25,727
希望你房間裡有顆大毛球

1234
01:08:25,727 --> 01:08:28,021
因為那是你明年一整年唯一的玩具

1235
01:08:28,981 --> 01:08:33,193
你他媽在笑什麼?

1236
01:08:33,193 --> 01:08:36,572
你在笑我嗎?你別想再整一次鼻子

1237
01:08:36,572 --> 01:08:38,157
- 沒差,我也不想整
- 很好

1238
01:08:38,157 --> 01:08:40,450
我真心希望你會認同

1239
01:08:40,450 --> 01:08:42,786
那團繃帶下面的狗屁模樣

1240
01:08:42,786 --> 01:08:44,288
我就說沒事了啊

1241
01:08:44,872 --> 01:08:49,626
有沒有事是我說了算

1242
01:09:00,971 --> 01:09:01,889
昨晚好玩嗎?

1243
01:09:02,806 --> 01:09:04,141
你有跟貝莉聯絡了嗎?

1244
01:09:04,141 --> 01:09:06,393
還沒,為什麼?怎麼了?

1245
01:09:08,729 --> 01:09:09,938
我把一切都搞砸了

1246
01:09:11,481 --> 01:09:12,357
想聽建議嗎?

1247
01:09:12,941 --> 01:09:14,902
我猜猜,去吃屌啦

1248
01:09:16,403 --> 01:09:18,405
其實我是要說,做你自己就好

1249
01:09:20,574 --> 01:09:23,368
- 我還以為你討厭我
- 聽著,貝莉喜歡你

1250
01:09:23,368 --> 01:09:27,039
不是現在這個你,是真正的你

1251
01:09:27,623 --> 01:09:30,083
看到她出現會臉紅的那個阿宅

1252
01:09:30,083 --> 01:09:32,669
會唱史提夫汪達的歌
還會幹自己臥室的鏡子

1253
01:09:32,669 --> 01:09:33,629
我才沒有

1254
01:09:36,298 --> 01:09:37,216
隨便啦

1255
01:09:39,760 --> 01:09:42,012
老實說,我也比較喜歡他

1256
01:09:44,181 --> 01:09:45,641
少在那邊自怨自艾

1257
01:09:45,641 --> 01:09:48,143
把臉擦乾淨,去挽回她

1258
01:09:49,978 --> 01:09:51,104
你為什麼對我這麼好?

1259
01:09:52,064 --> 01:09:52,898
我也不知道

1260
01:09:54,316 --> 01:09:55,484
我好像腦震盪了

1261
01:09:59,613 --> 01:10:00,530
你一定沒問題

1262
01:10:17,464 --> 01:10:18,298
搞屁...

1263
01:10:18,298 --> 01:10:21,009
最好有人告訴我這是怎麼回事

1264
01:10:21,009 --> 01:10:23,720
瘋婆娘,你打傷我的耳朵了

1265
01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:24,930
答錯!

1266
01:10:25,806 --> 01:10:28,600
拜託!別打了!

1267
01:10:31,436 --> 01:10:34,064
我是艾迪,他是康納

1268
01:10:34,564 --> 01:10:37,025
我們跟你讀同一所學校
這裡是我的房間

1269
01:10:37,025 --> 01:10:40,112
我他媽的衣服去哪了?

1270
01:10:40,112 --> 01:10:42,656
- 在洗衣機裡
- 我們昨晚在照顧你

1271
01:10:42,656 --> 01:10:44,116
拜託別傷害我們

1272
01:10:47,744 --> 01:10:49,413
為什麼要洗我的衣服?

1273
01:10:54,084 --> 01:10:56,336
聽著,出了一點意外

1274
01:11:00,966 --> 01:11:03,593
死定,她拉屎了

1275
01:11:06,138 --> 01:11:09,099
沒事,沒什麼大不了的,別在意

1276
01:11:23,322 --> 01:11:24,823
比搭校車爽吧?

1277
01:11:28,118 --> 01:11:30,037
我最近一直在想

1278
01:11:30,620 --> 01:11:32,372
如果你想跟別人說我是你爸

1279
01:11:33,540 --> 01:11:34,666
我也沒意見

1280
01:11:36,418 --> 01:11:37,419
不用了

1281
01:11:38,003 --> 01:11:41,381
有什麼需要就打給我
我會在家,跟你媽玩在一起

1282
01:11:48,221 --> 01:11:50,307
- 丹尼斯,我跟你說
- 怎麼了?

1283
01:11:50,307 --> 01:11:51,975
你他媽給我閉嘴

1284
01:11:53,060 --> 01:11:57,522
我不是你想的那種人,丹尼斯

1285
01:11:58,231 --> 01:12:00,484
現在不是了,我變了

1286
01:12:00,484 --> 01:12:04,696
我看過生屎關頭
不是老兵看的那種生死關頭

1287
01:12:04,696 --> 01:12:07,908
而是真正的屎

1288
01:12:07,908 --> 01:12:11,828
從你最愛的這台爛車滴下來的樣子

1289
01:12:15,457 --> 01:12:17,292
我完全聽不懂你在說什麼

1290
01:12:17,292 --> 01:12:18,585
我解釋給你聽

1291
01:12:19,086 --> 01:12:20,629
有天晚上,我開著你的車

1292
01:12:20,629 --> 01:12:23,882
後座載著全校最辣的妹

1293
01:12:23,882 --> 01:12:25,133
爽喔

1294
01:12:25,634 --> 01:12:27,260
她拉得到處都是

1295
01:12:27,928 --> 01:12:31,932
我盡量清過了
但我敢說,只要你閉上眼睛

1296
01:12:31,932 --> 01:12:33,934
應該還是能隱約聞到一絲味道

1297
01:12:39,398 --> 01:12:41,817
艾迪,如果真是這樣

1298
01:12:42,484 --> 01:12:45,028
那就是嚴重背叛了我的信任

1299
01:12:45,028 --> 01:12:46,780
怎樣?你要告我狀嗎?

1300
01:12:46,780 --> 01:12:52,369
當然,我...凡事都有後果
所以我不得不告訴你媽

1301
01:12:52,369 --> 01:12:56,289
好啊,我陪你去
你覺得她會站誰那邊?

1302
01:12:56,289 --> 01:12:57,290
他的小天使

1303
01:12:57,290 --> 01:13:00,585
還是地球上長相最可疑的人?

1304
01:13:03,046 --> 01:13:05,048
- 小天使
- 你說什麼?

1305
01:13:06,633 --> 01:13:07,509
小天使

1306
01:13:08,718 --> 01:13:10,053
我想也是

1307
01:13:10,846 --> 01:13:13,890
從現在起,你最好給我放尊重一點

1308
01:13:15,809 --> 01:13:17,769
我一向都很尊重你

1309
01:13:17,769 --> 01:13:20,439
隨便啦,三明治拿來

1310
01:13:31,825 --> 01:13:35,412
不好意思,不過兒童安全鎖好像沒開

1311
01:13:35,412 --> 01:13:36,580
可以幫我開門嗎?

1312
01:13:38,707 --> 01:13:39,541
好

1313
01:13:46,756 --> 01:13:47,966
你有跟小班聯絡嗎?

1314
01:13:47,966 --> 01:13:51,595
我昨天打給他
不過是他媽接的,語氣很不爽

1315
01:13:51,595 --> 01:13:52,596
你們好

1316
01:13:52,596 --> 01:13:54,473
靠,酷炫,你怎麼了?

1317
01:13:54,973 --> 01:13:56,224
我跟你說過什麼?

1318
01:13:57,726 --> 01:13:58,977
他是從哪冒出來的?

1319
01:14:00,061 --> 01:14:01,396
別再叫我酷炫了

1320
01:14:01,396 --> 01:14:03,315
當傳奇好累

1321
01:14:04,441 --> 01:14:07,903
而且我開始認為,我哥可能不是好人

1322
01:14:07,903 --> 01:14:10,197
- 他不是
- 對,他是神經病

1323
01:14:10,197 --> 01:14:12,574
從現在起,叫我達納就好

1324
01:14:13,158 --> 01:14:14,409
沒問題,達納

1325
01:14:16,411 --> 01:14:17,871
別用那種口吻叫

1326
01:14:20,207 --> 01:14:22,250
喬治,你好嗎?

1327
01:14:26,338 --> 01:14:28,006
- 你們周末有做什麼嗎?
- 沒有

1328
01:14:28,006 --> 01:14:30,717
- 蠻普通的
- 對啊,超遜

1329
01:14:30,717 --> 01:14:34,804
我們玩超爽的
你們要是有來一定也會喜歡

1330
01:14:34,804 --> 01:14:38,266
再次抱歉沒讓你們加一
下次一定沒問題

1331
01:14:38,266 --> 01:14:39,392
康納!艾迪!

1332
01:14:40,227 --> 01:14:42,229
卡崔娜奧利安納在跟你們招手?

1333
01:14:43,647 --> 01:14:45,065
好怪喔

1334
01:14:45,065 --> 01:14:47,234
我們最好還是去看一下好了

1335
01:14:47,234 --> 01:14:49,319
等等,我該一起去嗎?

1336
01:14:52,030 --> 01:14:54,616
不要吧,上面看起來有點擠

1337
01:14:54,616 --> 01:14:58,245
不過下次一定沒問題

1338
01:15:01,623 --> 01:15:03,166
- 艾莉莎
- 別煩我

1339
01:15:08,505 --> 01:15:11,800
慢著,胎兒,菜鳥坐最下面

1340
01:15:12,759 --> 01:15:15,053
對,塞回子宮吧,胎兒

1341
01:15:17,806 --> 01:15:19,641
請問一下,你他媽哪位?

1342
01:15:20,308 --> 01:15:21,184
我?我是...

1343
01:15:21,184 --> 01:15:22,310
沒人在乎

1344
01:15:22,310 --> 01:15:25,230
他叫康納,不叫胎兒,爛人

1345
01:15:25,230 --> 01:15:27,440
給我滾,我朋友要坐這

1346
01:15:30,277 --> 01:15:32,112
我說的不難懂吧,爛人,讓開

1347
01:15:32,946 --> 01:15:34,990
快一點,時間是不等人的

1348
01:15:34,990 --> 01:15:35,907
謝謝

1349
01:15:39,578 --> 01:15:40,829
我洗過了

1350
01:15:40,829 --> 01:15:42,747
你不必這麼麻煩...

1351
01:15:42,747 --> 01:15:44,457
我還要說聲抱歉

1352
01:15:44,457 --> 01:15:45,584
沒關係啦

1353
01:15:45,584 --> 01:15:48,378
其實非常有關係

1354
01:15:48,378 --> 01:15:50,338
很抱歉讓你們應付那種醜態

1355
01:15:50,338 --> 01:15:53,508
- 我接受你的道歉
- 我根本不知道你在講什麼

1356
01:15:54,092 --> 01:15:55,677
謝謝你們這麼有風度

1357
01:15:56,177 --> 01:15:58,179
請過來跟我們一起坐

1358
01:16:02,475 --> 01:16:05,520
各位,他們是我朋友康納和艾迪

1359
01:16:05,520 --> 01:16:07,230
康納,你好,幸會

1360
01:16:07,230 --> 01:16:08,815
- 艾迪,你好
- 擊拳,擊掌

1361
01:16:08,815 --> 01:16:12,235
好,大家安靜

1362
01:16:14,154 --> 01:16:16,489
安靜,好

1363
01:16:16,489 --> 01:16:18,491
今天早上有很多事要講

1364
01:16:18,491 --> 01:16:20,410
先請巴蕾拉教練

1365
01:16:23,830 --> 01:16:27,042
各位,本學年目前才過一週

1366
01:16:27,042 --> 01:16:29,502
毛巾就已經不見得有夠誇張

1367
01:16:29,502 --> 01:16:33,048
這裡不是飯店,好嗎?
毛巾不是免費贈送

1368
01:16:33,048 --> 01:16:37,677
順便說件不相關的事
排球校隊亟需外援殺球手

1369
01:16:37,677 --> 01:16:40,639
所以如果有人突然抽高
麻煩讓我知道

1370
01:16:40,639 --> 01:16:45,268
如果你們有穿不下的牛仔褲

1371
01:16:45,268 --> 01:16:48,772
或是沒有以前那麼喜歡了

1372
01:16:48,772 --> 01:16:51,608
就捐到我們的少年牛仔褲箱裡

1373
01:16:51,608 --> 01:16:57,113
這些褲子會捐給
買不起牛仔褲的清寒少年

1374
01:16:57,947 --> 01:16:59,783
每個人都該有牛仔褲穿

1375
01:17:03,203 --> 01:17:06,081
好,今天差不多就到這...

1376
01:17:06,081 --> 01:17:08,583
看來還有一件事要宣布

1377
01:17:08,583 --> 01:17:11,711
有請班傑明尼爾森

1378
01:17:22,639 --> 01:17:23,598
大家好

1379
01:17:24,808 --> 01:17:27,268
- 我是小班
- 拉K哥

1380
01:17:31,439 --> 01:17:32,607
我有話要說

1381
01:17:35,568 --> 01:17:38,988
- 我期待上高中好久了
- 阿宅

1382
01:17:42,826 --> 01:17:43,827
確實沒錯

1383
01:17:45,245 --> 01:17:46,496
但我因為某些原因

1384
01:17:46,496 --> 01:17:48,873
相信自己上高中就會潛力全開

1385
01:17:49,582 --> 01:17:52,544
一開始確實不錯
認識了不少很棒的人

1386
01:17:54,129 --> 01:17:55,505
但他們沒能認識我

1387
01:17:56,923 --> 01:17:58,174
沒認識到真正的我

1388
01:17:58,758 --> 01:18:02,220
我一心只想討好大家

1389
01:18:03,096 --> 01:18:05,765
卻忽略了真正在乎的那個人

1390
01:18:07,684 --> 01:18:08,643
貝莉

1391
01:18:09,227 --> 01:18:10,520
這首歌要獻給你

1392
01:18:20,530 --> 01:18:22,615
靠,他在唱歌,他媽的在唱歌

1393
01:19:14,584 --> 01:19:15,668
我愛你!

1394
01:19:37,148 --> 01:19:38,650
他瘋了

1395
01:19:42,904 --> 01:19:44,197
大家一起唱

1396
01:20:04,217 --> 01:20:05,468
貝莉,你說呢?

1397
01:20:06,344 --> 01:20:07,762
願意當我的女朋友嗎?

1398
01:20:20,233 --> 01:20:22,735
不要,你在幹嘛啊?

1399
01:20:24,904 --> 01:20:26,072
糗死!

1400
01:20:34,581 --> 01:20:39,544
安靜!好戲演完了,通通回教室

1401
01:20:42,171 --> 01:20:43,172
真遺憾,老弟

1402
01:20:56,603 --> 01:20:57,520
你會沒事的

1403
01:20:57,520 --> 01:21:00,023
對啊,至少你努力過了

1404
01:21:00,732 --> 01:21:02,442
你們剛才沒看到嗎?

1405
01:21:02,442 --> 01:21:04,903
那是我這輩子所見過最狠的場面

1406
01:21:04,903 --> 01:21:07,363
- 閉嘴啦
- 不信的話就再看一次啊

1407
01:21:07,363 --> 01:21:08,615
手機收起來啦

1408
01:21:08,615 --> 01:21:10,241
搞屁啊?你還錄下來?

1409
01:21:13,828 --> 01:21:15,622
你真的還錄下來?

1410
01:21:16,122 --> 01:21:17,957
你有夠不可靠

1411
01:21:21,377 --> 01:21:23,796
小班,你還好嗎?

1412
01:21:25,089 --> 01:21:26,716
我很好

1413
01:21:28,468 --> 01:21:29,552
高中還很長

1414
01:22:47,505 --> 01:22:53,136
《新生嚇嚇叫》

1415
01:22:54,762 --> 01:22:57,849
- 您找我嗎?
- 米屈,請坐

1416
01:23:12,030 --> 01:23:12,989
那是什麼?

1417
01:23:15,158 --> 01:23:16,409
科學!

1418
01:23:17,368 --> 01:23:18,369
我...

1419
01:23:18,369 --> 01:23:22,290
你應該明白我們不得不開除你

1420
01:23:22,290 --> 01:23:24,208
明白,完全明白

1421
01:23:26,794 --> 01:23:27,628
好

1422
01:23:37,805 --> 01:23:38,973
門要開著還是...

1423
01:23:38,973 --> 01:23:40,516
- 關上
- 好,沒問題

1424
01:23:42,101 --> 01:23:43,061
勇士隊加油

1425
01:29:05,257 --> 01:29:10,262
字幕翻譯:韓仁耀