1 00:00:01,971 --> 00:00:03,641 All right, everyone. I'm heading out early 2 00:00:03,674 --> 00:00:04,175 for my dentist appointment. 3 00:00:04,342 --> 00:00:05,678 Clean teeth are happy teeth! 4 00:00:05,712 --> 00:00:06,479 Good luck, boss. 5 00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:09,218 Oh, um, I thought that the bite suits would be 6 00:00:09,218 --> 00:00:10,555 back by now from the dry cleaners. 7 00:00:10,589 --> 00:00:12,391 If they're delivered by EOD, would you guys mind 8 00:00:12,391 --> 00:00:13,359 putting them in the closet? 9 00:00:13,393 --> 00:00:14,596 -Mm-hmm. -[Patel] Absolutely. 10 00:00:14,629 --> 00:00:16,332 -Yeah, totally. -Okay. 11 00:00:21,511 --> 00:00:24,582 Whatever you want. Bookie's closed. Let's go! 12 00:00:24,616 --> 00:00:26,252 [group cheers] 13 00:00:26,285 --> 00:00:27,487 [Patel] Come on, Frank! 14 00:00:29,391 --> 00:00:31,162 How are you not falling down? 15 00:00:31,195 --> 00:00:33,834 I've got a foot and 25 pounds of muscle on you. 16 00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:37,207 Low center of gravity, baby. This weeble won't wobble. 17 00:00:37,742 --> 00:00:39,345 [Shred and Frank grunt] 18 00:00:41,783 --> 00:00:43,453 [Shred growls] 19 00:00:43,453 --> 00:00:44,389 Hey, no biting! 20 00:00:44,657 --> 00:00:47,027 Actually, I guess that's kinda what the suits are for. 21 00:00:47,060 --> 00:00:48,296 That's okay. Chomp away! 22 00:00:48,329 --> 00:00:50,601 Hey, guys, I just forgot my wall-- 23 00:00:54,408 --> 00:00:57,616 Do you guys ever work, even a little? 24 00:00:57,649 --> 00:00:59,252 You know, in many ways, 25 00:00:59,285 --> 00:01:01,455 this is your fault, for trusting us. 26 00:01:02,592 --> 00:01:05,564 ♪ [vocalizing] 27 00:01:32,451 --> 00:01:33,253 [Emily] Okay, one more thing. 28 00:01:33,487 --> 00:01:35,825 I have noticed that some of our adoptable cats 29 00:01:35,859 --> 00:01:37,696 are getting a little bit chunky. 30 00:01:37,729 --> 00:01:39,600 Okay, let's not body shame the animals. 31 00:01:39,633 --> 00:01:41,570 Trust me, the shame is not with the cat. 32 00:01:41,570 --> 00:01:44,543 Okay, uh, meeting adjourned. Unless anyone has anything else? 33 00:01:44,543 --> 00:01:46,713 I got something. Why are you drinking Shred's coffee? 34 00:01:48,951 --> 00:01:51,423 Oh! Whoops-a-doodle-doo. 35 00:01:51,456 --> 00:01:54,362 I must have picked up the wrong drink 36 00:01:54,395 --> 00:01:55,565 in the kitchen earlier. 37 00:01:55,598 --> 00:01:57,134 -Uh, yeah. Yeah. -[Shred] Yeah. 38 00:01:57,167 --> 00:01:58,704 -So... ah! -Been looking all over for this. 39 00:01:58,738 --> 00:02:00,274 -[Shred laughs] -Here you go. Mm-hmm. 40 00:02:00,307 --> 00:02:01,409 Just get these cooties off. 41 00:02:01,443 --> 00:02:03,279 -Right? -Right. Mm-hmm. 42 00:02:04,650 --> 00:02:05,651 [gasps] 43 00:02:06,152 --> 00:02:09,860 [clears throat] Forgot I ordered six 44 00:02:09,894 --> 00:02:11,129 shots of espresso. 45 00:02:11,195 --> 00:02:11,830 Yeah. 46 00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:13,499 -[Shred] So good. -Now you remember. 47 00:02:13,499 --> 00:02:14,736 [Emily] Okay. We're done here. 48 00:02:14,769 --> 00:02:15,738 Uh... Frank. 49 00:02:16,038 --> 00:02:19,345 I still need your paperwork for the 24 animals you brought in 50 00:02:19,345 --> 00:02:20,480 for the Jack Bauer. 51 00:02:20,514 --> 00:02:23,319 I would do it, but... stapler's broken. 52 00:02:23,353 --> 00:02:25,457 Okay, you have been making excuses not to do 53 00:02:25,457 --> 00:02:27,261 this paperwork for weeks now. 54 00:02:27,294 --> 00:02:29,199 Each moment I waste on paperwork, 55 00:02:29,199 --> 00:02:30,201 another animal dies. 56 00:02:30,467 --> 00:02:32,739 You're making this office into a Sarah McLaughlin commercial. 57 00:02:32,773 --> 00:02:36,079 That's inaccurate and also very dark for 8:00 AM. 58 00:02:36,112 --> 00:02:38,450 I just need the paperwork by the end of the day, please. 59 00:02:38,483 --> 00:02:40,220 And find another stapler. 60 00:02:40,254 --> 00:02:41,924 W-w-wait. You don't think I've thought of that? 61 00:02:42,257 --> 00:02:44,563 Because they're all broken. 62 00:02:44,730 --> 00:02:45,865 That's not possible. 63 00:02:46,733 --> 00:02:48,203 [Emily] Oh my God! 64 00:02:48,203 --> 00:02:50,241 This one's just a top? 65 00:02:50,241 --> 00:02:51,744 What are you guys doing to these things? 66 00:02:51,744 --> 00:02:53,747 Okay, well, you don't need a stapler to finish 67 00:02:53,747 --> 00:02:57,254 the paperwork, but I will put in a written request 68 00:02:57,287 --> 00:02:58,557 to the supply warehouse. 69 00:02:58,591 --> 00:03:02,364 Can't you see? We are hostages to bureaucracy. 70 00:03:02,398 --> 00:03:04,636 Filling out forms to get stuff we need 71 00:03:04,669 --> 00:03:07,274 to fill out forms we don't want to. 72 00:03:07,307 --> 00:03:08,811 We can't live like this! 73 00:03:08,878 --> 00:03:10,681 We have to rise up! 74 00:03:10,715 --> 00:03:11,750 Who is with me? 75 00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:13,186 I'm not with you. 76 00:03:13,219 --> 00:03:14,689 Because it's a stapler. 77 00:03:14,889 --> 00:03:17,562 Just do your paperwork. 78 00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:20,568 I'm in. 79 00:03:21,035 --> 00:03:22,906 You missed the moment, Patel. 80 00:03:22,939 --> 00:03:24,610 I mean, we had momentum. 81 00:03:25,344 --> 00:03:28,316 Okay, that coffee cup snafu? Way too close. 82 00:03:28,349 --> 00:03:30,320 Yes. Listen. Next time, I will make sure 83 00:03:30,353 --> 00:03:32,291 they don't write my name on both coffees 84 00:03:32,291 --> 00:03:33,159 when we have a sleepover. 85 00:03:33,426 --> 00:03:35,364 I am just really scared that we're gonna get sloppy, 86 00:03:35,397 --> 00:03:36,399 and then people are gonna find out, 87 00:03:36,433 --> 00:03:38,470 and then I'm gonna have to wear the scarlet P 88 00:03:38,470 --> 00:03:39,539 for power dynamic imbalance. 89 00:03:39,573 --> 00:03:40,541 -Okay, hey. -[Emily gasps] 90 00:03:40,575 --> 00:03:41,510 You're spiraling a little bit. 91 00:03:41,777 --> 00:03:44,015 Might be the gallon of coffee you drink every day, huh? 92 00:03:44,048 --> 00:03:45,719 I'm literally vibrating right now. 93 00:03:45,785 --> 00:03:48,322 That's 'cause you're a candy-ass green tea boy. 94 00:03:48,590 --> 00:03:50,862 I'm so sorry. I think I'm in withdrawal. 95 00:03:50,895 --> 00:03:53,233 It's okay. Victoria's the only one that knows, 96 00:03:53,267 --> 00:03:54,035 and she's a vault. 97 00:03:54,269 --> 00:03:56,039 Yes, but that's only 'cause she doesn't have 98 00:03:56,072 --> 00:03:57,942 anyone to gossip with. I mean, it's the exponential 99 00:03:57,976 --> 00:03:58,944 rule of gossip. 100 00:03:59,245 --> 00:04:01,415 When two people know something, they talk, someone overhears, 101 00:04:01,482 --> 00:04:03,921 and then the rumor mill is fully operational. 102 00:04:03,955 --> 00:04:04,990 [Emily] Oh, God. 103 00:04:04,990 --> 00:04:05,725 Hello. 104 00:04:05,925 --> 00:04:06,727 What the hell was that coffee cup fiasco? 105 00:04:07,194 --> 00:04:09,700 Might as well take your tops off and motorboat each other. 106 00:04:09,700 --> 00:04:11,570 You guys are so lucky that I have no one 107 00:04:11,604 --> 00:04:13,339 to talk to about this. If I could, I would. 108 00:04:13,339 --> 00:04:14,175 I'd be yappin'. 109 00:04:14,408 --> 00:04:16,279 What did I just say? Exponential rule of gossip. 110 00:04:16,312 --> 00:04:17,281 She did just say this. 111 00:04:17,315 --> 00:04:18,985 Lock it up. Okay? 112 00:04:19,018 --> 00:04:20,588 And stagger your exits. 113 00:04:20,588 --> 00:04:22,457 -We know. -Okay, we're not that sloppy. 114 00:04:22,457 --> 00:04:23,326 [Emily on radio] Hey, Truck Eight. 115 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:26,399 I just got a call from Wellington Prep and they-- 116 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:27,535 Do they want my blood? 117 00:04:27,569 --> 00:04:29,438 I paid my tuition, I know I did! 118 00:04:29,438 --> 00:04:32,277 Actually, there's a loose squirrel in the building. 119 00:04:32,310 --> 00:04:34,014 Oh, well, how did the squirrel get in for free? 120 00:04:34,048 --> 00:04:35,450 Dude, talk about something else. 121 00:04:35,450 --> 00:04:36,252 Please. Let it go. 122 00:04:36,486 --> 00:04:38,456 Yeah, Patel, I know that's your kid's school. 123 00:04:38,489 --> 00:04:40,561 Do you want the call, or is that weird? 124 00:04:40,594 --> 00:04:42,599 [Patel] No, I want it. I 100 percent want it, 125 00:04:42,632 --> 00:04:44,702 actually, 'cause I can't wait to go and see the-- 126 00:04:44,702 --> 00:04:45,738 -Addy? -No. 127 00:04:45,771 --> 00:04:46,506 God-- no. 128 00:04:46,740 --> 00:04:48,544 There's a cannon that they fire at high noon. 129 00:04:48,577 --> 00:04:50,648 Right? They should point it at the squirrel and save us a trip. 130 00:04:50,682 --> 00:04:52,885 But then we'd wanna see that too, wouldn't we? 131 00:04:52,919 --> 00:04:53,854 That'd be nice. 132 00:04:54,589 --> 00:04:56,593 ♪ 133 00:04:57,729 --> 00:04:59,833 I finally got the rhythm for this hold music down, 134 00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:01,068 watch this. 135 00:05:01,770 --> 00:05:04,442 So, you're still on hold with the supply warehouse? 136 00:05:04,475 --> 00:05:06,847 Supply warehouse? No. What are you doing? 137 00:05:06,881 --> 00:05:08,784 We're cutting through the red tape of bureaucracy 138 00:05:08,784 --> 00:05:10,922 with a 10-year-old pair of rusty safety scissors. 139 00:05:10,922 --> 00:05:12,792 You do not call the supply warehouse. 140 00:05:12,826 --> 00:05:14,529 Okay, Arnie, the warehouse manager 141 00:05:14,562 --> 00:05:16,499 has to be handled very delicately, 142 00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,904 or he buries your request at the bottom of the pile. 143 00:05:18,904 --> 00:05:20,908 I'm gonna get this done. That's why you brought me in. 144 00:05:20,908 --> 00:05:22,779 I didn't bring you in. Jiminy crickets, 145 00:05:22,779 --> 00:05:25,283 I am this close to getting the Scandinavian label maker 146 00:05:25,316 --> 00:05:26,987 that I requested four months ago. 147 00:05:26,987 --> 00:05:28,089 It does fonts. 148 00:05:28,123 --> 00:05:29,859 And... are we in Blue Man Group? 149 00:05:29,893 --> 00:05:31,797 Could you just stop drumming maybe? 150 00:05:31,830 --> 00:05:33,667 Sorry. I forgot I was doing it, so... 151 00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:35,905 10:38. Good time for a second lunch. 152 00:05:35,938 --> 00:05:37,274 Play me out, then follow. 153 00:05:37,508 --> 00:05:39,378 [tapping rhythmically] 154 00:05:39,612 --> 00:05:41,650 Whoa! This place is so nice. 155 00:05:41,683 --> 00:05:43,954 All of the toilet stalls still had their doors. 156 00:05:45,124 --> 00:05:46,392 Vice Principal Richardson. 157 00:05:46,425 --> 00:05:47,494 -Hello. -Nice to see you. 158 00:05:47,528 --> 00:05:49,933 Don't worry, we've, uh, captured this interloper. 159 00:05:49,999 --> 00:05:51,770 You, straight to detention! 160 00:05:51,803 --> 00:05:53,440 Mr. Patel, I'm glad you're here, 161 00:05:53,473 --> 00:05:55,410 and not just for the rabid squirrel. 162 00:05:55,443 --> 00:05:57,314 Oh, no, this squirrel isn't rabid. 163 00:05:57,347 --> 00:05:58,718 She's just in heat. 164 00:05:58,751 --> 00:06:00,722 Probably ran in here to hide from all the males. 165 00:06:00,755 --> 00:06:02,692 I wanted to express my condolences 166 00:06:02,692 --> 00:06:03,761 on the loss of your uncle. 167 00:06:03,794 --> 00:06:05,832 I hope Addy's back in school soon. 168 00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:08,103 Well, thank-thank you so much for saying that. 169 00:06:08,136 --> 00:06:09,606 I will pass it on to her. 170 00:06:10,406 --> 00:06:11,208 Good seeing you. 171 00:06:11,408 --> 00:06:13,113 I didn't know your uncle died. I'm so sorry. 172 00:06:13,146 --> 00:06:13,914 Oh, he's perfectly alive. 173 00:06:14,181 --> 00:06:16,419 I just didn't want her to know that I'm raising 174 00:06:16,419 --> 00:06:17,856 a filthy little liar. 175 00:06:17,856 --> 00:06:18,991 -No. -Mm-hmm. 176 00:06:19,927 --> 00:06:22,699 She's at a muffler shop. That little-- no. 177 00:06:22,732 --> 00:06:25,538 It's moving. She's at a... a boutique. 178 00:06:25,538 --> 00:06:27,475 Addy's skipping school to go shopping. 179 00:06:27,509 --> 00:06:29,411 Maybe I do like her. 180 00:06:29,411 --> 00:06:31,115 Nah. I don't. 181 00:06:31,149 --> 00:06:32,552 [Shred] So, I had a crazy idea. 182 00:06:32,586 --> 00:06:34,689 For lunch, instead of going to a bar 183 00:06:34,689 --> 00:06:36,727 and watching TV like we usually do, 184 00:06:36,727 --> 00:06:39,532 we get a booth, maybe make a little eye contact. 185 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:40,901 -Talk about-- -Shred, we're not 186 00:06:40,935 --> 00:06:41,570 going to lunch. 187 00:06:41,837 --> 00:06:43,139 We have our most dangerous assignment. 188 00:06:43,139 --> 00:06:44,676 -What? -Acquiring a state-issued 189 00:06:44,709 --> 00:06:46,547 eight dollar stapler without paperwork. 190 00:06:46,580 --> 00:06:49,151 Emily specifically said not to talk to Arnie. 191 00:06:49,586 --> 00:06:51,590 You know, blind devotion to me used to be 192 00:06:51,590 --> 00:06:54,027 your greatest quality, but something changed. 193 00:06:54,027 --> 00:06:54,829 Something shifted. 194 00:06:55,029 --> 00:06:56,833 Like, when did you start drinking espresso? 195 00:06:56,867 --> 00:06:58,937 I'm very cosmopolitan, actually. 196 00:06:58,971 --> 00:07:01,743 You think that focaccia is a country. 197 00:07:01,776 --> 00:07:04,850 Six espresso shots is Emily's unhinged order. 198 00:07:04,883 --> 00:07:08,189 No, no, no. T'was but a barista's error. 199 00:07:08,222 --> 00:07:09,158 Wait, and another thing. 200 00:07:09,458 --> 00:07:11,663 You used to spend, I'd say 80 percent of our truck rides 201 00:07:11,697 --> 00:07:12,732 pining over Emily. 202 00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:14,502 But now that you're both single, 203 00:07:14,535 --> 00:07:15,604 not a peep. 204 00:07:15,638 --> 00:07:17,809 No. No, I'm just over her, man. 205 00:07:17,842 --> 00:07:20,681 Okay, like I-I watched her blow her nose and look at it. 206 00:07:20,714 --> 00:07:22,084 It was freakin' gross. 207 00:07:22,417 --> 00:07:24,790 Does espresso make you sweat? Is that-- 208 00:07:25,190 --> 00:07:27,194 -What? -Where'd you get that? 209 00:07:27,194 --> 00:07:28,598 From home. 210 00:07:28,631 --> 00:07:31,402 That's like an adult, regular bandage. 211 00:07:31,468 --> 00:07:33,439 You only wear Ninja Turtles. 212 00:07:33,473 --> 00:07:34,709 Whose is that? 213 00:07:34,709 --> 00:07:35,911 Mine. 214 00:07:35,945 --> 00:07:36,980 Emily's. 215 00:07:37,481 --> 00:07:39,719 You're having secret sex with the boss. 216 00:07:43,527 --> 00:07:44,227 Ahhh! [thud] 217 00:07:44,261 --> 00:07:45,164 [laughs] 218 00:07:45,364 --> 00:07:47,233 I'll take that as confirmation! 219 00:07:50,708 --> 00:07:53,614 Okay. Thank you for picking me up. 220 00:07:53,648 --> 00:07:55,685 That hurt a lot more than I thought it would. 221 00:07:55,718 --> 00:07:56,720 All right, here's the deal. 222 00:07:56,954 --> 00:08:00,460 I'm gonna need you to not say anything about me and Emily. 223 00:08:00,493 --> 00:08:03,066 You are underestimating just how disinterested 224 00:08:03,099 --> 00:08:04,001 I am in your love life. 225 00:08:04,301 --> 00:08:06,840 Yeah, brother, I need you to sheath that sarcasm sword, 226 00:08:06,873 --> 00:08:10,013 and I need you to promise me you won't tell anybody, 227 00:08:10,013 --> 00:08:10,748 especially Emily. 228 00:08:10,948 --> 00:08:12,585 This whole thing's already got her on edge. 229 00:08:12,619 --> 00:08:13,954 Oh, I won't tell. 230 00:08:14,556 --> 00:08:16,960 I mean, if you go to the warehouse with me. 231 00:08:16,994 --> 00:08:18,797 Frank. Blackmail? 232 00:08:18,797 --> 00:08:20,901 Come on, you're better than that. 233 00:08:21,335 --> 00:08:22,805 I'm not. 234 00:08:25,243 --> 00:08:27,582 Hi, Frank Shaw. Precinct 22. 235 00:08:27,615 --> 00:08:29,519 This won't take long, just need a box of 236 00:08:29,519 --> 00:08:31,256 full strip staplers in tundra gray. 237 00:08:31,957 --> 00:08:35,230 Interesting. I didn't see a requisition form come through. 238 00:08:35,263 --> 00:08:36,298 No, I didn't submit one. 239 00:08:36,332 --> 00:08:37,669 Not really a paperwork kinda guy. 240 00:08:37,702 --> 00:08:38,937 That's unfortunate. 241 00:08:38,971 --> 00:08:40,975 I mean, is it necessary? It's just a... 242 00:08:40,975 --> 00:08:42,912 stupid piece of paper. -[Arnie scoffs] 243 00:08:44,716 --> 00:08:46,987 Now you insult my forms. 244 00:08:46,987 --> 00:08:50,126 I'm gonna have to politely ask you to leave. 245 00:08:50,762 --> 00:08:51,863 Or? 246 00:08:52,999 --> 00:08:54,034 Or... 247 00:08:55,938 --> 00:08:59,111 [western standoff music plays] 248 00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:03,119 [clears throat] 249 00:09:03,119 --> 00:09:05,591 Um, sorry, this is kinda freaking me out. 250 00:09:05,624 --> 00:09:07,595 Can we just leave and maybe I'll buy you a stapler? 251 00:09:07,595 --> 00:09:09,097 I'm in the middle of a staring contest right now, 252 00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:11,704 and you just made me realize how dry my eyes are, damn it. 253 00:09:11,704 --> 00:09:13,540 -Yep. -Let's go. 254 00:09:13,573 --> 00:09:14,542 Are you sure she's here? 255 00:09:14,575 --> 00:09:16,947 'Cause, like, these clothes are quite cool. 256 00:09:16,980 --> 00:09:19,217 See, that blue's so interes-- oh. 257 00:09:19,519 --> 00:09:21,155 Hi, ma'am. Can I offer you something 258 00:09:21,155 --> 00:09:22,892 from our you should be in school collection? 259 00:09:22,925 --> 00:09:24,729 I knew I should have left my phone in my locker. 260 00:09:24,763 --> 00:09:27,133 You tell me why you're not in school right now, 261 00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:30,173 or I'm gonna do the K-pop dance right here for everyone. 262 00:09:30,741 --> 00:09:33,714 -Oh, you don't-- -Oh my God. Stop! 263 00:09:33,747 --> 00:09:35,316 Fine. I'm being bullied. 264 00:09:38,056 --> 00:09:39,257 By Zoe. 265 00:09:40,762 --> 00:09:42,998 She's, like, the most popular girl in school. 266 00:09:42,998 --> 00:09:45,705 Dad, her mom lives in France. 267 00:09:45,738 --> 00:09:47,374 Yeah, and I live in constant fear 268 00:09:47,407 --> 00:09:48,743 that your pants are on fire 269 00:09:48,777 --> 00:09:50,380 because you are a liar, liar-- 270 00:09:50,380 --> 00:09:51,617 -What? -[Victoria] Can I talk to you 271 00:09:51,650 --> 00:09:52,752 -Yeah. -by the socks for one second. 272 00:09:52,786 --> 00:09:54,221 I can see exactly what you're doing. 273 00:09:54,254 --> 00:09:55,223 -Stay there. -Over here. 274 00:09:55,524 --> 00:09:57,929 -These are lovely, aren't they? -What are-- what are you doing? 275 00:09:57,929 --> 00:09:59,666 Addy's 100 percent getting bullied. 276 00:09:59,699 --> 00:10:00,701 Oh, don't be a sucker. 277 00:10:00,935 --> 00:10:03,272 She just wants to waste my money in a different location. 278 00:10:03,306 --> 00:10:05,243 You wanna know how I know this? 279 00:10:05,243 --> 00:10:07,213 And it might blow your mind. 280 00:10:07,247 --> 00:10:08,784 I was a bully. 281 00:10:08,818 --> 00:10:10,821 Yeah, that's-- I just assumed that you were. 282 00:10:10,855 --> 00:10:13,125 And I would've gone after Addy on day one. 283 00:10:13,125 --> 00:10:14,127 Look at her. 284 00:10:15,329 --> 00:10:16,165 [Patel] Yeah. 285 00:10:16,432 --> 00:10:18,904 She's wearing both halves of a best friends necklace. 286 00:10:18,904 --> 00:10:21,910 And I just see a really normal girl with a really hot dad. 287 00:10:21,910 --> 00:10:24,248 Okay. I know what I'm talking about 288 00:10:24,248 --> 00:10:25,684 'cause I was a monster. 289 00:10:25,684 --> 00:10:27,955 They wanted to make a documentary about me. 290 00:10:29,224 --> 00:10:31,395 ♪ 291 00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:34,301 Okay. 292 00:10:35,671 --> 00:10:36,640 -Grr! -Well... 293 00:10:36,673 --> 00:10:37,942 yeah, it's a tough break. 294 00:10:37,976 --> 00:10:39,946 But, hey, let's go get that bro lunch. 295 00:10:39,946 --> 00:10:42,050 We're not going to lunch until I pry open the window 296 00:10:42,084 --> 00:10:44,387 of government inefficiency and take what I deserve. 297 00:10:44,421 --> 00:10:46,693 Wait, are you talking about breaking and entering? 298 00:10:46,760 --> 00:10:48,998 A B & E? You're talking B & Es right now? 299 00:10:49,031 --> 00:10:50,701 I can't do a B & E, Frank. 300 00:10:50,735 --> 00:10:51,670 Oh, yes, you can. 301 00:10:51,903 --> 00:10:54,174 Unless you want me to tell your very neurotic girlfriend 302 00:10:54,207 --> 00:10:56,713 that I know a secret that'll rip her world apart. 303 00:10:56,713 --> 00:10:57,982 What is your end game, Frank? 304 00:10:58,016 --> 00:10:59,719 I mean, let's say you get the stapler. 305 00:10:59,752 --> 00:11:01,255 You're still gonna have to do that paperwork. 306 00:11:01,288 --> 00:11:02,324 No, I won't. 307 00:11:02,357 --> 00:11:03,727 I got thousands of excuses. 308 00:11:03,761 --> 00:11:05,964 Hand cramp, religious holiday, back cramp. 309 00:11:05,998 --> 00:11:08,169 I can kick this down the road until retirement. 310 00:11:08,202 --> 00:11:09,806 You're insane, brother. 311 00:11:09,806 --> 00:11:11,175 And it sounds like you're cramping a lot. 312 00:11:11,208 --> 00:11:12,978 We gotta get you some potassium supplements 313 00:11:13,045 --> 00:11:14,816 or something. -What I gotta get... 314 00:11:14,850 --> 00:11:16,119 is an accomplice. 315 00:11:16,185 --> 00:11:17,387 Fine. 316 00:11:17,420 --> 00:11:19,057 Let's get this over with. 317 00:11:21,696 --> 00:11:23,833 Okay. You got this, kid. 318 00:11:23,867 --> 00:11:25,203 Eww, God. Dad. 319 00:11:25,203 --> 00:11:26,205 All right. 320 00:11:26,238 --> 00:11:27,441 Stay strong. 321 00:11:27,441 --> 00:11:28,442 Aww. 322 00:11:28,475 --> 00:11:29,244 Yeah. 323 00:11:29,444 --> 00:11:31,081 I really hope she crumbles, because if she 324 00:11:31,115 --> 00:11:33,019 transfers schools, I save so much money. 325 00:11:33,019 --> 00:11:35,189 You don't know what Zoe could do to her long-term. 326 00:11:35,223 --> 00:11:37,695 To this day, I still get messages from women saying that 327 00:11:37,729 --> 00:11:39,765 Little Vicky ruined their lives. 328 00:11:39,765 --> 00:11:42,070 Well, I certainly don't want that for Addy. 329 00:11:42,070 --> 00:11:42,738 Yeah. 330 00:11:42,972 --> 00:11:44,809 God, you know, it just wrecks me that 331 00:11:44,842 --> 00:11:47,114 all this swagger, like, skipped a generation. 332 00:11:47,114 --> 00:11:48,482 -Right? -The, the swagger-- 333 00:11:48,482 --> 00:11:50,353 Zoe. Lookin' fire. 334 00:11:52,357 --> 00:11:53,292 [Victoria] That must be her. 335 00:11:53,560 --> 00:11:55,463 You know what? I'm gonna go talk to the vice principal, 336 00:11:55,496 --> 00:11:57,467 ask her to make an announcement -Stop. Stop. Sweetie. 337 00:11:57,502 --> 00:11:59,404 to the entire school and then they all find out-- 338 00:11:59,438 --> 00:12:00,674 It is like you have a playbook 339 00:12:00,708 --> 00:12:02,377 on how to create scarring memories. 340 00:12:02,411 --> 00:12:03,379 You've gotta stop. 341 00:12:04,381 --> 00:12:05,450 I'll talk to Zoe. 342 00:12:06,052 --> 00:12:08,957 Cool girl to cool girl, you know. 343 00:12:11,162 --> 00:12:13,299 [whispers] Why are you doing that with your hair? 344 00:12:17,074 --> 00:12:18,209 Hey, girl. 345 00:12:18,476 --> 00:12:19,846 You are so dope. 346 00:12:19,879 --> 00:12:21,348 I love, I love that fit. 347 00:12:21,381 --> 00:12:22,719 Um... 348 00:12:22,752 --> 00:12:23,353 Question. 349 00:12:23,554 --> 00:12:25,223 And this is, like, super cringey. 350 00:12:25,223 --> 00:12:25,891 Um... 351 00:12:26,058 --> 00:12:27,493 Do you think you could be, like, 352 00:12:27,528 --> 00:12:29,532 chiller to Addy? 353 00:12:31,368 --> 00:12:32,705 Are you somebody's mom? 354 00:12:32,739 --> 00:12:33,507 Is somebody missing their mom? 355 00:12:33,707 --> 00:12:35,711 Nope. No, I'm not that much older than you. 356 00:12:35,745 --> 00:12:37,246 I'm, like, borderline big sister age. 357 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:38,850 Maybe you need to spend less time 358 00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:40,554 looking up teen slang on ChatGPT 359 00:12:40,554 --> 00:12:42,959 because it's giving you a tech neck. 360 00:12:42,992 --> 00:12:44,428 Wrinkles in the front. 361 00:12:44,462 --> 00:12:45,798 Hump in the back. 362 00:12:45,798 --> 00:12:47,200 You're a humpback whale. 363 00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:48,102 Humpback. 364 00:12:48,335 --> 00:12:51,509 [students chanting] Humpback, humpback, humpback! 365 00:12:51,543 --> 00:12:54,882 Humpback, humpback, humpback! 366 00:12:54,916 --> 00:12:55,985 What did you do? 367 00:12:56,018 --> 00:12:57,387 [Victoria] I hate my neck! 368 00:13:01,963 --> 00:13:03,767 God. You gotta push, Shred. 369 00:13:03,801 --> 00:13:05,537 -With your feet. -[Shred] I am pushing! 370 00:13:05,571 --> 00:13:07,206 Put your hands above your head. 371 00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:08,275 [Shred] I am. 372 00:13:10,279 --> 00:13:11,448 Perfect execution. 373 00:13:12,952 --> 00:13:14,221 Okay. I'm up here. 374 00:13:14,254 --> 00:13:16,191 Frank, where's your hand? Frank, your hand? 375 00:13:17,127 --> 00:13:18,897 My relationship's exposed. 376 00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:21,035 I'm being blackmailed. Committing a crime. 377 00:13:21,670 --> 00:13:23,807 Caffeine's a gateway drug, Frank. 378 00:13:23,807 --> 00:13:25,309 [Frank] There they are. 379 00:13:25,342 --> 00:13:26,546 This is it. 380 00:13:29,552 --> 00:13:30,954 [Frank laughs] 381 00:13:30,988 --> 00:13:32,423 And preloaded. 382 00:13:33,192 --> 00:13:34,194 [door closes] 383 00:13:44,582 --> 00:13:45,918 [whispers] Shred? 384 00:13:45,918 --> 00:13:47,621 [whispers] Frank, that was too close. 385 00:13:47,621 --> 00:13:49,091 [bubblewrap pops] 386 00:13:49,091 --> 00:13:50,126 Stop! 387 00:13:50,159 --> 00:13:51,094 [gasps] 388 00:13:51,629 --> 00:13:53,199 -Stop! -I can't! 389 00:13:53,232 --> 00:13:54,134 Stop. 390 00:13:54,903 --> 00:13:56,773 I asked you to leave. 391 00:13:56,806 --> 00:13:58,142 He asked you to leave. 392 00:14:00,146 --> 00:14:01,883 Now you don't get to leave. 393 00:14:01,916 --> 00:14:03,085 Now, you don't get to-- 394 00:14:03,119 --> 00:14:04,387 Johnny, let me have my moment. -I'm sorry. 395 00:14:04,421 --> 00:14:07,528 Now you don't get to leave and swarm. Unbelievable. 396 00:14:07,562 --> 00:14:09,031 Frank? Swarm? 397 00:14:09,031 --> 00:14:10,232 [bubblewrap popping] 398 00:14:16,612 --> 00:14:18,248 [Frank grunts] 399 00:14:19,351 --> 00:14:20,086 All I wanted 400 00:14:20,286 --> 00:14:22,290 was a little bit of lunch with my bro. 401 00:14:22,323 --> 00:14:23,358 Soup. 402 00:14:23,392 --> 00:14:24,662 Half a sandwich. 403 00:14:24,662 --> 00:14:25,898 Regular stuff. 404 00:14:25,932 --> 00:14:27,401 And now I'm here. 405 00:14:27,434 --> 00:14:29,639 Prisoner of a war I wanted no part of. 406 00:14:29,672 --> 00:14:32,143 We are all prisoners in the war against bureaucracy. 407 00:14:32,176 --> 00:14:34,114 I'm glad you're finally figuring that out. 408 00:14:34,649 --> 00:14:36,318 [Arnie] Look upon my things. 409 00:14:36,753 --> 00:14:39,023 Look upon my beautiful things 410 00:14:39,023 --> 00:14:40,627 and despair. 411 00:14:42,264 --> 00:14:46,271 You know, I'm pretty sure this counts as kidnapping! 412 00:14:46,304 --> 00:14:47,139 I mean, 413 00:14:47,373 --> 00:14:49,044 I don't wanna victim blame, but we did break in. 414 00:14:49,077 --> 00:14:49,879 It's kind of a legal wash. 415 00:14:50,079 --> 00:14:52,417 [Arnie] The squeak-less dry erase markers. 416 00:14:52,451 --> 00:14:53,954 Magnets so strong 417 00:14:53,987 --> 00:14:56,458 they could hold up even your ego. 418 00:14:56,458 --> 00:14:58,396 And it could've all been yours 419 00:14:58,429 --> 00:15:01,903 if you just filled out the proper paperwork. 420 00:15:01,937 --> 00:15:03,305 [knock at door] 421 00:15:04,207 --> 00:15:04,942 Arnie? 422 00:15:05,109 --> 00:15:07,313 Um, it's Emily from, uh, Precinct 22. 423 00:15:07,313 --> 00:15:08,950 Thank you so much for calling me 424 00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:10,186 instead of the police, and... 425 00:15:10,219 --> 00:15:12,190 I'm so sorry about Shred and Frank. 426 00:15:12,223 --> 00:15:14,061 It was disappointing. 427 00:15:14,094 --> 00:15:17,167 Oh, it is definitely disappointing, 428 00:15:17,234 --> 00:15:18,069 and I certainly hope it won't affect 429 00:15:18,336 --> 00:15:22,544 what I feel is a wonderful working relationship. 430 00:15:23,145 --> 00:15:26,318 You put in for the Copenhagen label maker, didn't you? 431 00:15:26,351 --> 00:15:29,592 Mmm. Yes, I did, and I am excited. 432 00:15:29,625 --> 00:15:30,627 Ah... 433 00:15:31,428 --> 00:15:32,363 Ah! Hmm. 434 00:15:32,363 --> 00:15:34,301 -Hmm? -Oh. Yep, that's the one. 435 00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:36,973 That's me. I filled it out in, uh, blue ballpoint ink, 436 00:15:37,006 --> 00:15:38,610 just like you requested. 437 00:15:40,046 --> 00:15:42,083 [whispers] Oh, God. No. 438 00:15:42,985 --> 00:15:44,722 [whimpers] 439 00:15:46,224 --> 00:15:47,227 Oh, God. 440 00:15:47,528 --> 00:15:50,534 Realistically, I'm looking at 2027, aren't I? 441 00:15:50,601 --> 00:15:52,303 If things break your way. 442 00:15:52,738 --> 00:15:54,308 Mm-hmm. 443 00:15:54,609 --> 00:15:56,311 Well, that girl was mean. 444 00:15:58,517 --> 00:16:00,721 -Are you, uh-- -Trying to fix my hump? 445 00:16:00,754 --> 00:16:02,123 Yeah, I am. 446 00:16:02,190 --> 00:16:03,727 Zoe destroyed me. 447 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,465 And now I know what all the girls I tormented felt like. 448 00:16:06,700 --> 00:16:08,236 First time experiencing empathy? 449 00:16:08,269 --> 00:16:11,175 From this day forward, I'm turning over a new leaf. 450 00:16:11,208 --> 00:16:13,378 I'm never gonna be mean ever again. 451 00:16:13,378 --> 00:16:16,018 Well, you can't become a better person just yet. 452 00:16:16,051 --> 00:16:17,688 We still gotta figure out what to do with Zoe. 453 00:16:17,721 --> 00:16:18,389 Nah, I'm outta the game. 454 00:16:18,623 --> 00:16:20,994 It's just... it's not who I am anymore. 455 00:16:21,028 --> 00:16:21,963 If she's making you feel like this, 456 00:16:22,196 --> 00:16:24,401 imagine what she's doing to all those kids at Wellington. 457 00:16:24,434 --> 00:16:26,772 We need to stop her for Addy. 458 00:16:28,242 --> 00:16:29,144 Meh. 459 00:16:29,177 --> 00:16:30,580 Okay, well, maybe we need to do this 460 00:16:30,614 --> 00:16:33,485 for all the kids tormented by Little Vicky. 461 00:16:34,254 --> 00:16:35,657 So, what do you say? 462 00:16:36,592 --> 00:16:37,761 One last job? 463 00:16:42,303 --> 00:16:44,474 [Patel] Why do we need to find Zoe's car? 464 00:16:44,509 --> 00:16:47,247 [Victoria] How about we leave the revenge to Little Vicky. 465 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:49,251 Found it. Now what? 466 00:16:49,552 --> 00:16:51,757 Oh, great. I don't even have to break in. 467 00:16:51,790 --> 00:16:52,825 Huh? 468 00:16:53,059 --> 00:16:55,731 Wait until the male squirrels get a whiff of these pheromones. 469 00:16:55,764 --> 00:16:57,100 Wha-- nah, it's not gonna-- 470 00:16:57,133 --> 00:16:59,237 Come and get it, boys! 471 00:16:59,237 --> 00:17:00,472 [Victoria laughs] 472 00:17:01,609 --> 00:17:03,547 [squirrels chittering] 473 00:17:03,580 --> 00:17:06,418 You're a sick genius. 474 00:17:07,120 --> 00:17:08,355 [squirrels chittering] 475 00:17:08,389 --> 00:17:10,392 [Victoria] Ah, this is so good. 476 00:17:12,063 --> 00:17:14,234 The real prank's on these horny boys. 477 00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:18,342 All that anticipation just to end up alone with a towel. 478 00:17:18,375 --> 00:17:20,046 Hittin' too close to home? 479 00:17:20,046 --> 00:17:21,315 Oh, yeah. 480 00:17:21,348 --> 00:17:23,787 You know, I expected this out of you, Frank. 481 00:17:23,821 --> 00:17:27,093 You expected us to get kidnapped by an office supply warlord 482 00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:28,028 in pleated pants? 483 00:17:28,328 --> 00:17:31,234 Never mind. But, Shred? I am really disappointed in you. 484 00:17:31,268 --> 00:17:33,238 I have been working my tush off for months 485 00:17:33,238 --> 00:17:34,808 to get that label maker, and you know it. 486 00:17:34,808 --> 00:17:36,513 My drawers, they're unlabeled. 487 00:17:36,546 --> 00:17:39,184 My file folders, they're handwritten tabs. 488 00:17:39,217 --> 00:17:41,488 The spot on my desk where a label maker should be, 489 00:17:41,488 --> 00:17:43,492 that's empty, Shred. There's nothing there. 490 00:17:43,527 --> 00:17:44,528 Emily, he knows. 491 00:17:44,762 --> 00:17:48,135 That I'm your boss and you're my employee 492 00:17:48,135 --> 00:17:49,404 in a normal working relationship? 493 00:17:49,438 --> 00:17:52,443 Emily, he knows we're star-crossed lovers. 494 00:17:53,145 --> 00:17:55,283 What? You... you told him? 495 00:17:55,316 --> 00:17:57,053 No, I didn't tell him, he figured it out. 496 00:17:57,086 --> 00:17:58,422 He's too good at noticing. 497 00:18:00,728 --> 00:18:02,397 Wow. 498 00:18:02,430 --> 00:18:03,533 Okay. 499 00:18:03,566 --> 00:18:04,300 That's that. 500 00:18:04,535 --> 00:18:06,872 Everybody's gonna find out, and oh, my God, 501 00:18:06,906 --> 00:18:09,378 I am the Harvey Weinstein of Seattle government. 502 00:18:09,411 --> 00:18:11,481 So, I am so glad that I have a pre-written apology 503 00:18:11,515 --> 00:18:13,085 to the city on my Notes app. 504 00:18:13,119 --> 00:18:15,456 -[gasps] Oh, my God. -No. No. Hey. No. 505 00:18:15,490 --> 00:18:17,393 If you go down, I'm going down with you. 506 00:18:17,393 --> 00:18:19,532 Although I don't... I don't think we should use the phrase 507 00:18:19,566 --> 00:18:21,468 "going down" in any official capacity. 508 00:18:21,502 --> 00:18:23,305 All right. All right, guys. Guys. 509 00:18:24,208 --> 00:18:26,344 I'm not gonna tell anyone. 510 00:18:27,146 --> 00:18:28,683 As long as... 511 00:18:29,017 --> 00:18:30,319 As long as what? 512 00:18:30,352 --> 00:18:31,690 Don't take the bait, Emily. 513 00:18:31,690 --> 00:18:34,261 Okay, it's a slippery slope. He never stops taking. 514 00:18:34,294 --> 00:18:35,664 I'm a man of honor, 515 00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:38,736 and I would never abuse this new power. 516 00:18:38,770 --> 00:18:39,538 [Shred] Nuh-uh. 517 00:18:39,772 --> 00:18:41,475 He says stuff like that and he doesn't mean it. 518 00:18:41,509 --> 00:18:44,180 [shushes] Quiet, the big boys are talking. 519 00:18:44,214 --> 00:18:46,284 All right, Frank. 520 00:18:46,318 --> 00:18:47,788 Name your price. 521 00:18:55,203 --> 00:18:56,639 Remember, those have my name on them, 522 00:18:56,673 --> 00:18:59,511 so half-ass it the same way I would. 523 00:18:59,545 --> 00:19:00,312 Wait, remind me. 524 00:19:00,547 --> 00:19:02,383 Why are we doing Frank's paperwork, again? 525 00:19:02,417 --> 00:19:04,454 Yeah, well, you know, Frank's rescues 526 00:19:04,487 --> 00:19:05,791 really benefit all of us. 527 00:19:05,824 --> 00:19:07,126 So, it only makes sense that 528 00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:08,663 we should all share in the act of-- 529 00:19:08,696 --> 00:19:11,201 Look, I don't know, I'll just buy you guys pizza, okay? 530 00:19:11,234 --> 00:19:13,840 For myself, I will have a green goddess salad 531 00:19:13,873 --> 00:19:15,376 with dressing on the side. 532 00:19:15,944 --> 00:19:17,581 Uh-huh. 533 00:19:18,583 --> 00:19:21,822 Addy says the whole school thinks I squirreled Zoe's car, 534 00:19:21,856 --> 00:19:23,225 so now I'm cool! 535 00:19:23,259 --> 00:19:25,196 -We did it, we did it! -Take that, Zoe. 536 00:19:25,229 --> 00:19:26,098 Being popular is the best. 537 00:19:26,298 --> 00:19:28,436 It's like being mayor, but you have actual power. 538 00:19:28,469 --> 00:19:30,306 Good thing high school goes by prison rules! 539 00:19:30,339 --> 00:19:31,776 [Victoria] Whoo! We did it! 540 00:19:31,810 --> 00:19:33,478 ♪ 541 00:19:35,483 --> 00:19:36,586 Frank. 542 00:19:36,619 --> 00:19:40,259 I saw that little look between you, Shred and Emily. 543 00:19:40,293 --> 00:19:41,428 I know you know. 544 00:19:41,461 --> 00:19:43,232 -I know nothin'. -Right. Yeah. 545 00:19:43,232 --> 00:19:44,133 I forgot you're a terrible detective. 546 00:19:44,434 --> 00:19:47,440 You'd never be able to piece that together on your own. 547 00:19:47,473 --> 00:19:48,309 Okay. 548 00:19:48,677 --> 00:19:50,345 I knew for months before they told me, 549 00:19:50,379 --> 00:19:51,281 but that's not a confirmation. 550 00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:53,485 You have to gossip with me because I have had nobody 551 00:19:53,519 --> 00:19:54,421 to talk to about this. 552 00:19:54,454 --> 00:19:55,757 And you still don't. 553 00:19:55,791 --> 00:19:57,627 No! You're no fun. 554 00:19:58,228 --> 00:19:59,798 All right. Yeah. 555 00:19:59,798 --> 00:20:01,769 They're not the worst couple in the world. 556 00:20:01,802 --> 00:20:02,771 Wow. That's so lovely. 557 00:20:03,038 --> 00:20:05,611 But your best man speech will have to be better than that. 558 00:20:05,644 --> 00:20:07,782 Well, obviously, I would be the officiant. 559 00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:08,650 If they make it that far. 560 00:20:08,684 --> 00:20:10,821 But office romances never end well. 561 00:20:11,523 --> 00:20:13,827 I think if it's for the right person, 562 00:20:13,860 --> 00:20:15,630 it's worth the risk. 563 00:20:17,399 --> 00:20:19,805 Imagine risking it all for Shred. 564 00:20:20,674 --> 00:20:22,711 I'm sensing a little bit of jealousy. 565 00:20:22,745 --> 00:20:23,479 Are you jealous? 566 00:20:23,713 --> 00:20:24,447 I could steal him from her in a heartbeat. 567 00:20:24,916 --> 00:20:27,386 Only if you're willing to do what Emily does with him. 568 00:20:27,386 --> 00:20:30,259 Which I'm assuming is some very intense hand-holding. 569 00:20:30,259 --> 00:20:31,696 See ya, Sands. 570 00:20:31,696 --> 00:20:34,300 I love your backpack. What time do you jump? 571 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:35,703 [Frank] Shut up! 572 00:20:39,912 --> 00:20:40,781 [knocking] 573 00:20:40,981 --> 00:20:42,717 -Hey. -Uh... 574 00:20:43,586 --> 00:20:45,490 I was hoping I could have off-- 575 00:20:45,524 --> 00:20:46,458 I know what you're doing. 576 00:20:46,693 --> 00:20:49,698 You're gonna blackmail me to get what you want... forever. 577 00:20:49,732 --> 00:20:51,301 Great. You get it. 578 00:20:51,301 --> 00:20:53,607 So, about the next 36 Fridays. 579 00:20:53,607 --> 00:20:55,577 See, that's where you're wrong, because I am, in fact, 580 00:20:55,577 --> 00:20:56,912 reverse blackmailing you. 581 00:20:56,946 --> 00:20:58,617 Shred, lights! 582 00:20:59,184 --> 00:21:01,789 Sorry, Frank, but also... ha-ha! 583 00:21:03,492 --> 00:21:04,729 [Frank singing] The greatest 584 00:21:04,762 --> 00:21:09,437 magicians have something to learn 585 00:21:09,470 --> 00:21:12,409 from Mr. Mistoffelees' 586 00:21:12,443 --> 00:21:16,685 magical turn! 587 00:21:17,420 --> 00:21:19,625 Oh! Well, I never! 588 00:21:19,659 --> 00:21:23,031 Was there ever a cat so clever 589 00:21:23,031 --> 00:21:27,507 as Magical Mr. Mistoffelees? 590 00:21:28,710 --> 00:21:29,946 Oh! We-- 591 00:21:29,979 --> 00:21:31,615 Should I keep going? 592 00:21:32,350 --> 00:21:33,586 Very good.