1 00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:07,256 MEDITATION GUIDE: (OVER SPEAKER) Now allow your mind and body 2 00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:11,260 to be still as we take a purifying breath in... 3 00:00:11,261 --> 00:00:14,054 - (INHALES) - GUIDE: ....and out. 4 00:00:14,055 --> 00:00:15,597 ♪ (TRANQUIL MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 5 00:00:15,598 --> 00:00:17,725 GUIDE: And again, calming breath in... 6 00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:19,518 releasing out. 7 00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:21,437 - One more breath in... - (CELL PHONE BUZZING) 8 00:00:21,438 --> 00:00:23,023 GUIDE: ...and out. 9 00:00:24,482 --> 00:00:27,109 Allow any tensions in your body to-- 10 00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:28,110 - ♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪ - What? 11 00:00:28,111 --> 00:00:29,361 JAZ: Dan, the new producer 12 00:00:29,362 --> 00:00:31,155 just called an emergency meeting. 13 00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:33,700 Emergency meeting is in 25 minutes. 14 00:00:34,451 --> 00:00:37,161 Great! Fuck. Terrible. Bye. 15 00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:39,538 - ♪ (TRANQUIL MUSIC RESUMES) ♪ - GUIDE: ...to gently float away 16 00:00:39,539 --> 00:00:43,083 as we go again, in and out. 17 00:00:43,084 --> 00:00:46,128 - Can you feel the tension just melting away? - ♪ (INTENSE MUSIC OVERLAPPING) ♪ 18 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:47,838 - (CAR HORN HONKING) - (SCREAMS) 19 00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:49,757 God, these scripts are heavy. 20 00:00:49,758 --> 00:00:51,967 Probably because they're so great. 21 00:00:51,968 --> 00:00:55,220 Emergency all-hands. I hope it's not a firing squad. 22 00:00:55,221 --> 00:00:56,764 Are you worried it's a firing squad? 23 00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:58,140 Literally never crossed my mind. 24 00:00:58,141 --> 00:00:59,975 Smart. Don't overthink it. 25 00:00:59,976 --> 00:01:02,311 Like the script. If anything, underthink it. 26 00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:03,520 I've seen it a million times, Dag. 27 00:01:03,521 --> 00:01:05,647 Speed up, spend less, yada. It's just the biz. 28 00:01:05,648 --> 00:01:07,983 The biz. Like short for business. 29 00:01:07,984 --> 00:01:09,151 Did you coin that? 30 00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:10,486 I've literally never heard that before. 31 00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:12,488 Pre-dawn emergency meeting? 32 00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:13,655 Am I to be stripped and flogged 33 00:01:13,656 --> 00:01:15,157 in front of my fucking props department? 34 00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:17,326 And if it's a spanking, in a breakout room, please. 35 00:01:17,327 --> 00:01:19,370 - Breakout spanking. - Look, Eric, this is good. 36 00:01:19,371 --> 00:01:21,789 It shows she's invested in the movie. In your vision. 37 00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:23,040 JAZ: Meeting's cancelled. 38 00:01:23,041 --> 00:01:24,667 New producer just cancelled it. 39 00:01:24,668 --> 00:01:26,377 DANIEL: Sorry, what? 40 00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:28,380 DAG: Mind games. Bravo. 41 00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:30,506 ERIC: What is happening, Daniel? 42 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,216 Guys, it's called ghosting. 43 00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:33,759 Game recognize game? 44 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,010 (CONFUSED CHATTER) 45 00:01:35,011 --> 00:01:36,345 All right, listen up. 46 00:01:36,346 --> 00:01:37,680 (CHATTER STOPS) 47 00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:40,224 DANIEL: Do not panic. 48 00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:41,850 It's a stunt day, big technical day, 49 00:01:41,851 --> 00:01:44,687 and we're gonna execute this and show her how good we are. 50 00:01:44,688 --> 00:01:46,731 We're craftspeople, our director's a visionary. 51 00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:48,274 Forward cinema! 52 00:01:49,317 --> 00:01:51,528 - (SCATTERED APPLAUSE) - Thank you. 53 00:01:53,154 --> 00:01:54,488 Should we be clapping? 54 00:01:54,489 --> 00:01:56,448 Stephanie, bring my buggy around. 55 00:01:56,449 --> 00:01:58,283 And arrange me a rapid response haircut. 56 00:01:58,284 --> 00:01:59,368 This is serious. 57 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:00,703 Dan, would now be a good time 58 00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:02,037 to talk about career progressions? 59 00:02:02,038 --> 00:02:04,289 Everything's exploding at a million miles an hour 60 00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:07,251 and the movie is a scrotum resting on a razor's edge. 61 00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:09,086 Got it. So maybe like in an hour? 62 00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:11,714 Daniel. (CHUCKLES) Hey, what's happening? 63 00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:13,048 It's all good, mate. It's all good. 64 00:02:13,049 --> 00:02:14,675 Great, mate, great. What's happening? 65 00:02:14,676 --> 00:02:16,260 Yeah, no, it's all great. We're just forwards. 66 00:02:16,261 --> 00:02:17,594 Yeah, but what is happening? 67 00:02:17,595 --> 00:02:19,263 Like literally, what is happening? 68 00:02:19,264 --> 00:02:20,848 New producer, are we being X-rayed? 69 00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:22,016 Absolutely not. 70 00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:23,559 Because X-ray shows up something weird, 71 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:24,643 you cut out the tumor, 72 00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,228 and you replace it with Kit Harington. 73 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,105 - Or one of the Skarsgårds. - Which one? 74 00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:30,107 - I don't mind. - DANIEL: Adam, mate, this is not about you. 75 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:31,609 It has nothing to do with my body shape? 76 00:02:32,610 --> 00:02:34,695 I know I Dorito-ed myself. 77 00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,113 Dorito-ed myself, bigger on top, 78 00:02:36,114 --> 00:02:37,406 tapering down to a skinnier leg. 79 00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:38,949 But please tell our new producer 80 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:41,118 that I am prioritizing squats and lunges. 81 00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:42,911 Dude, the studio loves your legs. 82 00:02:42,912 --> 00:02:45,414 Oh, high fives for that guy's thighs. 83 00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:47,666 Great, 'cause don't believe everything you read online, 84 00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:48,834 especially WikiLegs. 85 00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:51,086 - Do not look up that site. - Morning, cunts. 86 00:02:51,087 --> 00:02:52,755 - Hello. - Headlamps on, 87 00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:54,631 ready for another day down the gold mine. 88 00:02:54,632 --> 00:02:56,842 Yes, Peter. All right, let's go. Okay. 89 00:02:56,843 --> 00:03:00,262 Poor pathetic little prick. Holding it together, 90 00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:02,056 but he knows. 91 00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:04,183 New producer airdrops in. 92 00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:06,769 He's auditioning for his job. You all are. 93 00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:09,146 But obviously not me. I'm just number two. 94 00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:11,273 Call sheet and my mother agree. 95 00:03:11,274 --> 00:03:13,901 I'm second best. See you out there, number one. 96 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:15,903 Just so you're hearing it so that you've heard it, 97 00:03:15,904 --> 00:03:18,280 new producer is cancelling 80 of our Moss Men for today. 98 00:03:18,281 --> 00:03:19,740 DAG: Mind games part two. Boom. 99 00:03:19,741 --> 00:03:21,617 Uh, okay. She's sending a message. 100 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:24,119 How much can we take before we squeal? 101 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:25,329 Scrooge McFuck. 102 00:03:25,330 --> 00:03:27,831 So how many extras do we have for the big crowd shot now? 103 00:03:27,832 --> 00:03:29,166 - Five. - (INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER) 104 00:03:29,167 --> 00:03:30,292 Eric's not gonna like that. 105 00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:31,835 I'm not gonna like that. I don't like that. 106 00:03:31,836 --> 00:03:34,255 Great. I'll let the trades know. 107 00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:36,675 Rude. 108 00:03:37,717 --> 00:03:40,428 ♪ (UPBEAT ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 109 00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:46,851 ♪ (MUSIC CONCLUDES) ♪ 110 00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:50,020 (BELL RINGING) 111 00:03:50,021 --> 00:03:54,108 Stunt day! All eyeballs on me. Will he make it? Will he cave? 112 00:03:54,109 --> 00:03:55,984 Will an actual man die? 113 00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:57,404 Yes, no, and no. 114 00:03:58,113 --> 00:03:59,488 Everyone's freaking out, Dag. 115 00:03:59,489 --> 00:04:01,824 Watch as I neutralize the mass panic. 116 00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:03,075 Xanax Man. 117 00:04:03,076 --> 00:04:05,494 I'm being asked to remind you, Peter's spine. 118 00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:07,955 He's only good for three launches, contractually. 119 00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,373 Okay, three goes! 120 00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:12,001 Peter's spine is good for three goes. 121 00:04:12,002 --> 00:04:13,669 Peter's spinal X-rays, if that helps. 122 00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:15,671 It doesn't. Back in your box, please, Bryson. 123 00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:16,839 Eric, sir. 124 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:19,383 Loving the haircut. A sharp cut for a sharp mind. 125 00:04:19,384 --> 00:04:22,636 Daniel, I stayed up till 5:00 a.m. 126 00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:24,847 redrawing storyboards for the Jackhammer escape. 127 00:04:24,848 --> 00:04:26,933 Eric, don't panic. We're going to hold the course. 128 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:29,351 Oh, my God, that's amazing. 129 00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:31,854 "A crowd of Moss People stretch to the horizon." 130 00:04:31,855 --> 00:04:34,107 Daniel, I have five. 131 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:37,526 - And it's bullshit. - I'll make it work, okay? 132 00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:39,445 I'm going to make a crowd of five look like 5,000. 133 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:41,572 Loaves and fishes, but for people. 134 00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:44,408 - Loaves and people. - Very nice. 135 00:04:44,409 --> 00:04:45,617 "The director's cut." 136 00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:47,829 It's funnier every time. Thank you, Stephanie. 137 00:04:48,913 --> 00:04:51,248 Hello. Number two checking in for business. 138 00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:54,001 So how are you up on the wires, number one? 139 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,377 (GROANS) Wonderful. Thank you, Peter. 140 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:58,589 Because one can look flaccid if one's not careful, 141 00:04:58,590 --> 00:05:00,758 bobbing around like astronaut cock. 142 00:05:00,759 --> 00:05:02,885 Well, my movement coach is from Zagreb's 143 00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:05,347 - foremost ballet, so... - How many ballets do they have? 144 00:05:06,097 --> 00:05:07,264 Uh... 145 00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:08,474 Ready? 146 00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:09,933 Uh, question on Mollusk Man. 147 00:05:09,934 --> 00:05:12,061 It's five minutes each time he needs the bathroom. 148 00:05:12,062 --> 00:05:14,522 So we could fit him with a bag or we do the diaper. 149 00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:17,399 - Diaper? - JAKY: Nappy. The adult nappy. 150 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,902 We've checked and they do come in his size from Belgium. 151 00:05:19,903 --> 00:05:22,571 - Big, big diaper. - Sounds like my kind of diaper. 152 00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,615 - (CHUCKLES) - Less comfortable and it will limit 153 00:05:24,616 --> 00:05:26,867 his range of movement, especially when sodden. 154 00:05:26,868 --> 00:05:28,452 Plus only a 300-dollar saving. 155 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:30,496 Less pleasant for all involved, the diaper, no? 156 00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:32,414 It's a saving in terms of playing ball. 157 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,291 Shows we're not afraid to make the tough decisions. 158 00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:35,417 For labor reasons, 159 00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:38,087 Shane can't know about the diaper but off the record... 160 00:05:38,088 --> 00:05:40,089 Okay, let's have him diapered. 161 00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:41,757 Happy to nappy. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY) 162 00:05:41,758 --> 00:05:43,967 "I'm ready for my diaper, Mr. DeMille." 163 00:05:43,968 --> 00:05:45,720 (LAUGHS) Very good. 164 00:05:47,555 --> 00:05:49,264 - Okay, stunt rehearsal. - Yeah. 165 00:05:49,265 --> 00:05:51,600 Stunt rehearsal, everyone on their A-game. 166 00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:54,478 Remember we are top-drawer professionals, thank you. 167 00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:55,604 - ADAM: Let's do it! - Eric, sir. 168 00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,440 Okay. And so... 169 00:05:58,525 --> 00:06:01,610 "The Jackhammer Escape." Moss Men swarm. 170 00:06:01,611 --> 00:06:03,696 Tecto produces his Invisible Jackhammer 171 00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:05,489 and both of you blast off to freedom. 172 00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,366 Running in the Invisible Jackhammer. 173 00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,952 (GASPS SOFTLY) Two words, no words. 174 00:06:09,953 --> 00:06:11,245 Third word, wow. 175 00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:13,789 - (EXHALES SHARPLY) - (KNOCKING) 176 00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:15,834 ADAM: Great. (EXHALES SHARPLY) 177 00:06:16,626 --> 00:06:19,670 My God, I am so blessed. 178 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:22,965 Front row seats for the Invisible Jackhammer. 179 00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:25,844 Standing here, watching you jacking off. 180 00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:30,305 Yeah. Uh, do-- do you have the concept art? 181 00:06:30,306 --> 00:06:31,391 Absolutely. 182 00:06:33,601 --> 00:06:36,979 Great, and how... how invisible is this thing? 183 00:06:36,980 --> 00:06:39,565 It's totally invisible. Obviously, you will see it. 184 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:41,275 Okay, I got it. 185 00:06:41,276 --> 00:06:43,111 I'm sorry, I don't got it. Um... 186 00:06:44,571 --> 00:06:46,155 It's like an air wobble. 187 00:06:46,156 --> 00:06:48,657 It would be nothing, but solid, yes? 188 00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:50,325 Okay, no, no. 189 00:06:50,326 --> 00:06:54,121 It's the outline, like glass. 190 00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:57,709 Yes, but is glass invisible? 191 00:06:59,169 --> 00:07:01,254 My dog once walked into a patio door, if that helps. 192 00:07:01,963 --> 00:07:03,130 Is it okay? 193 00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:04,381 PETER: Shh, quiet, please. 194 00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:06,593 Number one is pretending to be on a drill, 195 00:07:07,552 --> 00:07:08,677 which is invisible. 196 00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:09,720 Hey, props. 197 00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:13,140 Props, can I have my Tecto Sonic Blockers? 198 00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:14,391 JAZ: Locating Sonic Blockers. 199 00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:15,517 CREW: Locating Sonic Blockers! 200 00:07:15,518 --> 00:07:16,769 Are you sure about this? 201 00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:18,771 - The Invisible Jackhammer? - (INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER) 202 00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,856 I thought it would look cool, but it doesn't. 203 00:07:20,857 --> 00:07:23,776 Well, that's invaluable input, Mr. Spielberg. Thank you. 204 00:07:23,777 --> 00:07:25,361 Running in Sonic Blockers. 205 00:07:25,362 --> 00:07:26,987 Thanks. 206 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:28,238 I'm going to say something. Excuse me? 207 00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:30,366 I will genuinely incapacitate you. 208 00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:32,201 Yeah, just need a second with it. 209 00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:33,577 - ERIC: Yeah, the hair. - Hair. 210 00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:35,204 - ERIC: Fix the hair. - Hair. Fix the hair. 211 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:36,372 JAZ: Fixing the hair. 212 00:07:36,373 --> 00:07:37,748 If they're doing something wrong, 213 00:07:37,749 --> 00:07:38,999 surely we have to say. 214 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:41,251 No, Dag, we don't have an opinion, okay? 215 00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:43,754 We just keep the trains running. Who cares what's on them? 216 00:07:43,755 --> 00:07:45,381 Potatoes, Christmas presents. 217 00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:46,799 Dissidents, trafficked children. 218 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:48,634 That's not what it is though, is it? 219 00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:50,511 Ours is not to reason why, Dag. 220 00:07:50,512 --> 00:07:51,887 Can I at least have some headphones 221 00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:53,013 - so that I can hear? - Headphones? 222 00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:54,848 - Are you for fucking real? - JAZ: Still fixing the hair. 223 00:07:54,849 --> 00:07:56,642 I didn't get my first pair of headphones for six years. 224 00:07:56,643 --> 00:07:57,726 Okay. 225 00:07:57,727 --> 00:07:58,894 DANIEL: You see Mike, the gaffer? 226 00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:00,521 He worked on Raiders of the Lost Ark. 227 00:08:00,522 --> 00:08:03,023 Hasn't heard a single word of dialogue his entire career. 228 00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:04,358 Well, that's sad. 229 00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:05,651 - Poor Mike. - Yeah, well, 230 00:08:05,652 --> 00:08:07,152 it's heartbreaking, but it's the biz. 231 00:08:07,153 --> 00:08:08,570 - JAZ: Hair's fixed. - CREW: Hair's fixed. 232 00:08:08,571 --> 00:08:10,864 DANIEL: Okay, stunt rehearsal! 233 00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:12,492 "Surrounded on all sides, 234 00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:15,744 Tecto activates his Invisible Jackhammer, 235 00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:17,496 drilling down into the earth." 236 00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,124 - ♪ (HEROIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ - (GRUNTS) 237 00:08:19,791 --> 00:08:21,292 (IMITATES JACKHAMMER) 238 00:08:21,918 --> 00:08:22,961 "Tecto grabs Eye, 239 00:08:24,087 --> 00:08:27,423 and the force shoots them into the air like a rocket." 240 00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:30,801 Cue Moss Men and action stunt! 241 00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:32,136 ADAM: It's hammer time! 242 00:08:32,137 --> 00:08:34,931 - ♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪ - (MACHINE WHIRRING) 243 00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:39,018 ADAM: Warp speed, baby! 244 00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:42,271 - PETER: What are you doing? - ADAM: No one called "cut." 245 00:08:42,272 --> 00:08:45,816 Not for me to say, but shouldn't that be faster? 246 00:08:45,817 --> 00:08:48,610 - Shane is expecting warp speed. - ERIC: Okay, cut! 247 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:50,279 JAZ: The winch has to roll itself out, 248 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,072 15 meters to go. 249 00:08:52,073 --> 00:08:53,782 PETER: I've been in motorized bath chairs 250 00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:55,035 faster than this. 251 00:08:56,661 --> 00:08:59,580 ADAM: Eric! Hey, Eric! Any notes for me? 252 00:08:59,581 --> 00:09:01,665 So, I've been talking to Chris. 253 00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:03,459 Did I tell you that I've been talking to Chris? 254 00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:04,626 Couple of times, yeah, yeah. 255 00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:06,253 It's very cool how you're friends with him now. 256 00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:08,130 He writes me these beautiful letters. 257 00:09:08,131 --> 00:09:09,965 Longhand. 258 00:09:09,966 --> 00:09:12,343 Chris, always Chris, never Christopher. 259 00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:15,013 - Chris Nolan. - Wow, that's great for you. 260 00:09:16,181 --> 00:09:17,182 So great, anyway. 261 00:09:18,308 --> 00:09:20,017 Yeah, well, my point is... 262 00:09:20,018 --> 00:09:22,728 how would Chris make sense of the Invisible Jackhammer? 263 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:25,731 So yes. I want this. This here. 264 00:09:25,732 --> 00:09:27,483 Talk to our new producer, 265 00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:30,362 get me my 80 extras, or I will not shoot, yeah? 266 00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:33,989 (SIGHS) So tough, isn't it? The biz. 267 00:09:33,990 --> 00:09:35,908 Dag, I'm going to get this stunt if it kills me 268 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,451 and everyone involved in this production. 269 00:09:37,452 --> 00:09:38,911 Dan, I've got Health and Safety for you. 270 00:09:38,912 --> 00:09:40,829 Welcome! Thank you, Health and Safety. 271 00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:44,041 Onwards, with caution. (CLEARS THROAT) 272 00:09:44,042 --> 00:09:45,626 JAZ: Adam's gone back to his trailer. 273 00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,879 DANIEL: Course he has. Send in Xanax Man. 274 00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,218 Adam, sir. 275 00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:55,886 - Hey. - DANIEL: We need you back on set, mate. 276 00:09:55,887 --> 00:09:57,846 What's up? Just give me a second. 277 00:09:57,847 --> 00:09:58,847 Yeah. 278 00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:02,769 Um, will you just be straight with me? 279 00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:08,233 Do you buy me as a guy who can make earthquakes happen? 280 00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:10,402 Earthquakes, yes. 281 00:10:11,152 --> 00:10:12,153 Absolutely. 282 00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:15,031 Absolutely, 100 percent, okay? 283 00:10:15,949 --> 00:10:16,950 All right? 284 00:10:18,493 --> 00:10:19,660 We done? Cool. 285 00:10:19,661 --> 00:10:23,205 It's just so wild, you know, I gave up my dog to be here. 286 00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:25,749 - Like a top-of-the-line dog. - Oh, really? Top-of-the-line? 287 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,584 Yeah. I just... (SIGHS) 288 00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:29,253 I need you to be real with me. 289 00:10:29,254 --> 00:10:30,796 Like, as a... as a friend. 290 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,548 One of my closest friends, actually. 291 00:10:32,549 --> 00:10:34,425 Oh, Adam, I'm... I'm flattered. 292 00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:36,760 What do you think? Like, really, really think 293 00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:38,596 about the Invisible Jackhammer? 294 00:10:43,018 --> 00:10:45,310 Honestly, I think 295 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:48,106 the Invisible Jackhammer is fucking badass. 296 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:52,401 DANIEL: Mm. Mm-hmm. 297 00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:53,736 I'm not gonna look like an asshole up there? 298 00:10:53,737 --> 00:10:54,821 DANIEL: No, look. 299 00:10:55,739 --> 00:10:58,158 I feel fucking excellent. Okay? 300 00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:01,744 Anyone can do fucking... Ibsen. 301 00:11:01,745 --> 00:11:03,120 When you're flying through the air 302 00:11:03,121 --> 00:11:05,372 on a jackhammer made of sound waves, 303 00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:07,541 - you look awesome. - Really? 304 00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:10,252 You look brilliant. You're a genius. 305 00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:13,213 In my opinion, the greatest actor who ever lived. 306 00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:15,257 - (CLEARS THROAT) - Uh... 307 00:11:15,258 --> 00:11:17,760 No, I'm not. Like-- (SCOFFS) 308 00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:20,012 Don't make me repeat myself because I won't. 309 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:21,930 It's just Peter. He's fucking with me. 310 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:23,349 He's fucking with my head. It's like... 311 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:26,101 He's trying to undermine me in front of the new producer. 312 00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:27,978 It's, like, maybe the call sheet thing, 313 00:11:27,979 --> 00:11:30,439 or 'cause I'm number one and he doesn't like it? 314 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,025 You know, he's making faces, unscripted faces, and like-- 315 00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,443 DANIEL: Okay, I'm gonna talk to him. I will. 316 00:11:34,444 --> 00:11:36,028 - Thank you. Thank you. - Yeah. 317 00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:37,446 You're so good at your job. 318 00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:39,698 You know, I might have lost a dog, 319 00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:41,326 but I think I gained one too. 320 00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:44,787 Oh, me? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Woof, woof. 321 00:11:44,788 --> 00:11:46,288 (BOTH CHUCKLE) 322 00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:47,791 Yeah. All right. 323 00:11:49,125 --> 00:11:51,044 Daniel the Spaniel! (CHUCKLES) 324 00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:53,672 Thanks. 325 00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:03,889 Oh, don't mind me. I'm just poking through your stuff. 326 00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,016 If that's cool. 327 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,602 Movies, movies, movies. 328 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:09,813 Someone's a movie buff. 329 00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:11,980 Shrink wrap? 330 00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:13,649 Yeah, well, one day when all this is done, 331 00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:15,818 maybe I'll get to listen to the director's commentary 332 00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:17,195 on Eraserhead. 333 00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,531 DAG: My God, dare to dream. 334 00:12:20,573 --> 00:12:23,325 Okay, I've got a question for you. 335 00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:25,745 Have you ever thought, "Am I killing cinema?" 336 00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,372 Genuinely never thought about it. 337 00:12:28,373 --> 00:12:30,791 DAG: Because the, uh, Invisible Jackhammer 338 00:12:30,792 --> 00:12:33,335 got me thinking, what if you are? 339 00:12:33,336 --> 00:12:35,504 What if this isn't a dream factory? 340 00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:37,506 What if it's an abattoir, you know? 341 00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:39,675 And we've all got blood on our hands 342 00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:41,677 and fatty tissue on our faces 343 00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:43,637 and we're sat here, you know, eating sandwiches? 344 00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:45,639 Dag, can you just stop talking? Peck, peck, pecking away 345 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,683 like a fucking question chicken, okay? 346 00:12:47,684 --> 00:12:49,351 I'm happy to share my valuable industry insights 347 00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:51,353 and years of accumulated wisdom, but I just... 348 00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:53,981 Sorry for shouting. I just need to figure out 349 00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,524 how I'm going to execute this stunt 350 00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:56,900 before I lose my job. 351 00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:58,903 Sorry. Thank you, I'm sorry. 352 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:02,574 I filled up your water bottle. 353 00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,414 Well, that's really nice. 354 00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:11,874 And you've made me look like a prick. 355 00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:12,917 Sorry. 356 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,426 Look, you seem really smart. 357 00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:22,885 You're here now. 358 00:13:22,886 --> 00:13:24,428 We're going to be working together. That's great. 359 00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:27,931 I just need you to use your initiative, yeah? 360 00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:31,894 Anita's got everyone panicked. Like dogs in a washing machine. 361 00:13:31,895 --> 00:13:35,356 Mm. Crazy idea. Why don't you go and talk to her? 362 00:13:35,357 --> 00:13:36,566 (CHUCKLES) 363 00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:40,528 (SMACKS LIPS) Oh. 364 00:13:43,114 --> 00:13:44,490 Bit of fun. 365 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:47,160 Yeah, that was Jim. Third AD before you. 366 00:13:48,370 --> 00:13:50,080 He threw that up there before he killed himself. 367 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:52,248 (LAUGHS) 368 00:13:55,418 --> 00:13:57,087 DANIEL: You know what? Fuck it. 369 00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:02,717 ANITA: Enter. 370 00:14:05,387 --> 00:14:07,389 Dan, hi. Good to see you. 371 00:14:08,223 --> 00:14:09,307 Um... 372 00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,517 Um... 373 00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:13,727 - Eric wants his Moss-- - I'm so sorry about this morning. 374 00:14:13,728 --> 00:14:16,105 The emergency meeting, the no-show. 375 00:14:16,106 --> 00:14:17,357 Hope it didn't bump. 376 00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:21,068 Nah, nah. Barely noticed really. 377 00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,946 - Cool beans. - ANITA: Great. Uh, 378 00:14:23,947 --> 00:14:26,657 and I just wanted to make sure things aren't gonna be 379 00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:28,617 - weird between us. - Anita, why would they be weird? 380 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:30,619 Because we were fucking pretty successfully 381 00:14:30,620 --> 00:14:32,496 for about six months and then I started fucking 382 00:14:32,497 --> 00:14:34,498 a very famous Australian actor behind your back 383 00:14:34,499 --> 00:14:36,458 and now I'm your boss? 384 00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:38,836 I mean, I don't... I don't even think about that stuff anymore. 385 00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:41,463 Phew! (LAUGHS) What a relief, because, um, 386 00:14:41,464 --> 00:14:44,008 I may need to ream you out in front of everyone. 387 00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:45,342 Well, you can't shout at the director, 388 00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:46,593 so hit this bitch, right? 389 00:14:46,594 --> 00:14:49,430 - Yeah, a hanging in the town square. - A hanging. A hanging? 390 00:14:49,431 --> 00:14:52,141 A beating. A flogging. A... 391 00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:54,768 - forensic crucifixion. - Could we settle on a metaphor? 392 00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:57,438 It serves two purposes. One, spreads fear. Yum. 393 00:14:57,439 --> 00:14:59,189 - Two, it buries the lede about you and me. - Okay, sure. 394 00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:00,858 Because it would be very bad if people knew we were... 395 00:15:00,859 --> 00:15:03,152 Yeah, it's all right. You can burn me. 396 00:15:03,153 --> 00:15:05,821 I'm a human sacrifice. I'm the Wicker Man! 397 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:07,072 Wicker Dan! 398 00:15:07,073 --> 00:15:08,657 Is that shitty? Is that bad friending? 399 00:15:08,658 --> 00:15:10,160 (CLICKS TONGUE) Um... 400 00:15:11,036 --> 00:15:13,747 - (CHUCKLES) - Okay, look. 401 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,749 I need something in return. 402 00:15:16,750 --> 00:15:19,335 Spread your fear, but I need to sprinkle some hope. 403 00:15:19,336 --> 00:15:22,212 Eric is demanding his Moss Men back. 404 00:15:22,213 --> 00:15:24,340 Hm. Can't do it, Daniel. Need to show strength. 405 00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:26,884 But I will grab you for the hanging. 406 00:15:26,885 --> 00:15:28,511 Yeah? Cool beans? 407 00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:33,641 - Yes. The coolest of beans. - ANITA: Hm. 408 00:15:34,976 --> 00:15:37,227 DANIEL: Very fucking uncool beans, Dag. 409 00:15:37,228 --> 00:15:39,230 I'm about to get hung out to dry. 410 00:15:39,898 --> 00:15:42,524 Peter, sir? Do me a favor. 411 00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:43,942 Um, can you go easy on Adam? 412 00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:46,737 Oh my God. Have I done something to upset him? 413 00:15:46,738 --> 00:15:49,156 Christ, what a mess. 414 00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:51,367 If there's anything I can do in terms of the call sheet? 415 00:15:51,368 --> 00:15:52,826 Call sheet? Please. 416 00:15:52,827 --> 00:15:55,037 Not on my account. I'm very low maintenance. 417 00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:59,458 Now get that through your thick fucking skull, Daniel. 418 00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:01,543 Dan, new producer's asking if this could be a good time 419 00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:03,212 - to tear you a new one? - Um... 420 00:16:03,213 --> 00:16:05,047 Could she maybe not in front of the crewmen? 421 00:16:05,048 --> 00:16:07,508 Because they once saw me applying hand lotion. 422 00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:09,551 and, um, it didn't end well. 423 00:16:09,552 --> 00:16:11,220 ANITA: Okay, where's my first AD? 424 00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:12,721 DANIEL: Happening anyway. 425 00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:13,972 Hi, Daniel, nice to meet you. 426 00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:16,350 Uh, can I just ask why the fuck aren't we rolling? 427 00:16:16,351 --> 00:16:18,852 - DANIEL: Um... - ANITA: Oh, Eric! Maestro, come on over! 428 00:16:18,853 --> 00:16:20,896 I'm just trying to figure out why your first AD here 429 00:16:20,897 --> 00:16:22,064 is not taking care of you. 430 00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:24,525 Ah. (CLICKS TONGUE) Please go ahead. 431 00:16:24,526 --> 00:16:26,902 ANITA: So, your director is talking to the actors 432 00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:29,697 for 52 minutes on average before take one. 433 00:16:29,698 --> 00:16:32,241 - ERIC: Yes, I am. - ANITA: No disrespect to Eric, who we love, 434 00:16:32,242 --> 00:16:34,868 but you should not be allowing him to do that much talking. 435 00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:36,328 I need boundaries, Daniel. 436 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,414 Boundaries so he can knock them down. 437 00:16:38,415 --> 00:16:40,416 - Thank you, Steph. - If this is a pile-on, I should dial Shane. 438 00:16:40,417 --> 00:16:42,918 Eleven setups per day, which he will ask for 439 00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,753 - because he's a visionary. - No, please. 440 00:16:44,754 --> 00:16:46,964 I'm sorry, but what the fuck are you thinking? 441 00:16:46,965 --> 00:16:48,882 BRYSON: Shane, hi. Shellacking the first AD. 442 00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:50,759 ANITA: You need to start running things, Daniel. 443 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,721 It can feel a little sloppy here sometimes. 444 00:16:53,722 --> 00:16:55,097 DAG: It does sound like a lot of setups 445 00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:56,598 - when you hear it out loud. - DANIEL: Yeah, cheers, Dag. 446 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:57,766 ANITA: What the fuck are you doing? 447 00:16:57,767 --> 00:16:59,768 BRYSON: Pat, sir? We're apportioning blame over here. 448 00:16:59,769 --> 00:17:01,186 DAG: Oh no, now the angry man's coming. 449 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,147 Dinner and a show, don't mind if I do. 450 00:17:03,148 --> 00:17:06,442 - You fucked up, son, and now you gotta eat it. - PAT: Oh-ho-ho! 451 00:17:06,443 --> 00:17:09,153 ANITA: You need to be riding this man like a stallion. 452 00:17:09,154 --> 00:17:11,113 - Like a stallion. - DAG: Ride him like a stallion. 453 00:17:11,114 --> 00:17:12,364 But ride gently, okay? 454 00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:14,783 And when you beat him, carrot, not stick. 455 00:17:14,784 --> 00:17:16,827 - (FORCED LAUGH) - Hey, this isn't a witch hunt. 456 00:17:16,828 --> 00:17:18,620 Well, I want to know why it's not a witch hunt, 457 00:17:18,621 --> 00:17:20,205 - and who can we blame? - DANIEL: Funny. 458 00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:22,124 ANITA: But hey, big stunt today. 459 00:17:22,125 --> 00:17:23,167 Excited to see what you got. 460 00:17:23,168 --> 00:17:24,376 - Right, Pat? - PAT: That's right. 461 00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,588 Yeah. Tick-tock. Clock is ticking. 462 00:17:27,505 --> 00:17:29,131 BRYSON: Yes, sir. Daniel Kumar, first AD. 463 00:17:29,132 --> 00:17:31,217 Possible subject of a witch hunt. 464 00:17:32,010 --> 00:17:33,595 K-U-M-A-R. 465 00:17:37,432 --> 00:17:38,640 So sorry for weighing in. 466 00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:40,309 It was just a very infectious energy. 467 00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,518 Well, I'm glad you had fun. 468 00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:43,645 Now I just have to execute with everyone watching me 469 00:17:43,646 --> 00:17:46,148 or I could lose my job or someone might die. 470 00:17:46,149 --> 00:17:49,526 Okay, folks, game faces! Positions, positions, positions! 471 00:17:49,527 --> 00:17:51,820 - Keep saying positions. Show me. - Positions, positions. 472 00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:53,489 Heels up in three, two, one. 473 00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:55,324 - DAG: Positions. Positions. - DANIEL: Go. 474 00:17:55,325 --> 00:17:58,035 No. Shit. That has to work. Okay, two goes. 475 00:17:58,036 --> 00:18:00,162 Peter's spine can only do two more goes. 476 00:18:00,163 --> 00:18:02,664 Sam. Do me a favor. Peter's feeling quite frisky. 477 00:18:02,665 --> 00:18:04,124 Let's keep him on a tight leash. Thank you. 478 00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:05,501 Daniel, I found Jamie VFX. 479 00:18:05,502 --> 00:18:07,169 Jamie, pixel wizard, how are you holding up? 480 00:18:07,170 --> 00:18:08,337 I'm in the tunnel. 481 00:18:08,338 --> 00:18:10,631 My wife said it's like I've been dead for three months. 482 00:18:10,632 --> 00:18:13,634 (LAUGHS) Yeah, listen. Can we VFX 80 Moss Men? 483 00:18:13,635 --> 00:18:15,344 Insanely expensive, it'll look shit, 484 00:18:15,345 --> 00:18:17,096 and the additional workload might actually kill me. 485 00:18:17,097 --> 00:18:18,180 But you could actually do it? 486 00:18:18,181 --> 00:18:19,640 - I mean-- - Yes! Thank you, Jamie. 487 00:18:19,641 --> 00:18:20,849 - JAZ: This way, Jamie. - DANIEL: Good to see you. 488 00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,393 Eric, VFX can tile your Moss Men, 489 00:18:22,394 --> 00:18:23,811 you'll get your crowd, pinky promise, 490 00:18:23,812 --> 00:18:25,062 - can we just shoot? - DAG: Positions, positions... 491 00:18:25,063 --> 00:18:27,189 Okay. Thank you! Positions, positions. 492 00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:29,400 - Almost ready, folks. - (FILM CREW CLAMORING) 493 00:18:29,401 --> 00:18:30,944 Almost ready. 494 00:18:35,073 --> 00:18:36,365 PETER: You go telling tales, 495 00:18:36,366 --> 00:18:38,367 and so I'm now the fucking petty one. 496 00:18:38,368 --> 00:18:39,576 (DANIEL CLEARS THROAT LOUDLY) 497 00:18:39,577 --> 00:18:41,245 PETER: Why are you jerking me back? 498 00:18:41,246 --> 00:18:42,538 What are you doing? 499 00:18:42,539 --> 00:18:45,165 Just gonna go ten-one. Quick bathroom break. 500 00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:47,335 JAZ: Mollusk Man going ten-one behind a rock. 501 00:18:50,213 --> 00:18:52,298 Had a large coffee. Rookie error. 502 00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:55,844 No, that's working. Oh, fabulous. 503 00:18:57,012 --> 00:18:59,930 (GROANS) That is completely absorbed. 504 00:18:59,931 --> 00:19:02,099 Headphones. Who wants headphones? 505 00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:03,768 (CHUCKLES) I know I do. 506 00:19:04,561 --> 00:19:05,894 Lovely. Lovely. 507 00:19:05,895 --> 00:19:07,229 Dag, what the fuck are you doing? 508 00:19:07,230 --> 00:19:08,731 I'm using my initiative. 509 00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:10,941 Maybe if we can all hear, we'll all be better at our jobs. 510 00:19:10,942 --> 00:19:13,360 Okay. None of these people can have headphones, okay? 511 00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:14,945 It looks like I'm not in control of my fucking set. 512 00:19:14,946 --> 00:19:17,156 Sorry, folks. Dan said no headphones. 513 00:19:17,157 --> 00:19:19,408 I think maybe they're a symbol of authority. 514 00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:21,703 - Sorry, Mike. - Sorry, Mike. Not the bad guy. 515 00:19:22,787 --> 00:19:24,413 Positions! Can we just roll? 516 00:19:24,414 --> 00:19:26,582 Hey, Dan. Ready? Excited to see. 517 00:19:26,583 --> 00:19:28,751 DANIEL: Excited to see you seeing. 518 00:19:28,752 --> 00:19:31,129 - (BELL RINGING) - (FILM CREW CHATTERING) 519 00:19:32,297 --> 00:19:33,797 And action! 520 00:19:33,798 --> 00:19:36,843 ADAM: One second, Eric. I-- One second, I gotta sneeze. 521 00:19:38,345 --> 00:19:40,055 (SHUDDERS, EXHALES) 522 00:19:40,722 --> 00:19:42,057 Okay, it's gone. 523 00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:45,100 - Okay, I'm ready. - CREW: We're rolling! 524 00:19:45,101 --> 00:19:46,436 (EXHALES) 525 00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:50,647 Invisible. Jacking it. 526 00:19:50,648 --> 00:19:52,359 - (JACKHAMMER PROP KNOCKING) - There. 527 00:19:52,859 --> 00:19:54,235 Got it. Got it. 528 00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,321 Okay, and... 529 00:19:58,573 --> 00:19:59,615 Action! 530 00:19:59,616 --> 00:20:01,284 - ♪ (HEROIC MUSIC PLAYS) ♪ - (GRUNTS) 531 00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:06,581 DANIEL: Cue Moss Men. 532 00:20:08,625 --> 00:20:10,626 ADAM: It's hammer time! (SNEEZES) 533 00:20:10,627 --> 00:20:12,212 ♪ (MUSIC STOPS) ♪ 534 00:20:13,505 --> 00:20:16,048 ADAM: Ah, shit. Sneezed. 535 00:20:16,049 --> 00:20:17,883 - Sorry, sorry. - And cut. 536 00:20:17,884 --> 00:20:19,968 ADAM: Fucking allergies. Fucking allergies. 537 00:20:19,969 --> 00:20:23,055 - Cut there, thank you. - (CREW CHATTERING) 538 00:20:23,056 --> 00:20:25,766 - (CLAPBOARD CLAPS) - ADAM: Er-- Eric, can we use any of that? 539 00:20:25,767 --> 00:20:26,892 Can we use any of that? 540 00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:30,270 ERIC: No, Adam. Your face was sneezy and unusable. 541 00:20:30,271 --> 00:20:34,025 PETER: Poor number one. Gosh! Maybe he's allergic to acting. 542 00:20:35,485 --> 00:20:37,445 BRYSON: Letting Shane know we still don't have the stunt. 543 00:20:38,196 --> 00:20:40,323 - Okay, thank you. - Thank you. 544 00:20:41,032 --> 00:20:42,491 Not a good look, Dan. 545 00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:44,160 Maybe I should ream you out again? 546 00:20:45,203 --> 00:20:47,830 Anita, look, if I could speak freely? 547 00:20:47,831 --> 00:20:49,081 - Friend level. - Yeah. 548 00:20:49,082 --> 00:20:50,791 DANIEL: If you want to turn this movie around, 549 00:20:50,792 --> 00:20:53,002 stop shouting. Focus on the creative. 550 00:20:53,003 --> 00:20:54,795 The studio has lost its way. 551 00:20:54,796 --> 00:20:57,006 These movies are not hitting the way they used to. 552 00:20:57,007 --> 00:20:58,549 And I need your help. 553 00:20:58,550 --> 00:21:00,759 Yeah, well, Shane's pulled in all directions, 554 00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,511 like an octopus at a square dance. 555 00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:04,221 DANIEL: Exactly. The Invisible Jackhammer 556 00:21:04,222 --> 00:21:06,432 is the perfect example. I hated it in the comics. 557 00:21:06,433 --> 00:21:08,517 I hated it in the cartoons. It's totally ludicrous. 558 00:21:08,518 --> 00:21:10,060 What is it even made of? 559 00:21:10,061 --> 00:21:12,021 Oh, we've got a science advisor from MIT, 560 00:21:12,022 --> 00:21:13,355 but we broke his spirit 561 00:21:13,356 --> 00:21:14,898 and now he just nods everything through. 562 00:21:14,899 --> 00:21:17,026 If Shane had the headspace, if he was on it, 563 00:21:17,027 --> 00:21:18,986 if he was here, he'd say this is fucking dumb 564 00:21:18,987 --> 00:21:21,071 and we should cut it. Lose it from the movie. 565 00:21:21,072 --> 00:21:23,532 He needs boots on the ground. He needs us. 566 00:21:23,533 --> 00:21:25,409 I can call him. Direct report. 567 00:21:25,410 --> 00:21:27,036 I can talk to Shane whenever I want. 568 00:21:27,037 --> 00:21:28,579 Yes, that would be amazing. 569 00:21:28,580 --> 00:21:32,416 - Just yank the emergency cord. - Yank that fucking puppy. 570 00:21:32,417 --> 00:21:34,460 - Save the movie. - Save the day. 571 00:21:34,461 --> 00:21:35,920 DANIEL: Save the universe. 572 00:21:37,422 --> 00:21:39,923 We should, uh, loop in Eric, though. 573 00:21:39,924 --> 00:21:41,300 - Eric? - Eric. 574 00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:43,552 - Oh, Eric. Director Eric. Yes. - Yeah. 575 00:21:43,553 --> 00:21:44,720 Eric! 576 00:21:44,721 --> 00:21:46,013 ERIC: Fuck the Jackhammer. 577 00:21:46,014 --> 00:21:47,723 It was an albatross from the start. 578 00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:49,391 A giant invisible sea bird. 579 00:21:49,392 --> 00:21:52,978 STEPH: It is not now, nor shall it ever be, hammer time. 580 00:21:52,979 --> 00:21:55,606 Hey, Anita. Heard you were hoping to connect with Shane. 581 00:21:55,607 --> 00:21:57,566 Thank you, Bryson. I'd like to speak with him direct. 582 00:21:57,567 --> 00:21:58,860 Okay. 583 00:21:59,611 --> 00:22:02,196 Hey, Shane. Shane? 584 00:22:02,197 --> 00:22:03,781 BRYSON: (OVER PHONE) Hello, Anita. This is Bryson. 585 00:22:03,782 --> 00:22:05,074 Shane is not available, 586 00:22:05,075 --> 00:22:07,743 but Pat would like to see you on C stage. 587 00:22:07,744 --> 00:22:09,746 Thank you, of course. That'd be a delight. 588 00:22:10,872 --> 00:22:13,707 DANIEL: Okay, signal me if you need backup. I'm here. 589 00:22:13,708 --> 00:22:15,250 - (PIGEONS COOING) - ANITA: Pat. 590 00:22:15,251 --> 00:22:17,419 PAT: New soundstages for Centurios 2, 591 00:22:17,420 --> 00:22:18,587 our summer tentpole, 592 00:22:18,588 --> 00:22:20,798 and we have an infestation of fucking pigeons. 593 00:22:20,799 --> 00:22:22,466 Lasers. Just to scare them. 594 00:22:22,467 --> 00:22:25,469 We can't laser the birds in half, nor do we wish to. 595 00:22:25,470 --> 00:22:28,180 - (CLEARS THROAT) Three o'clock, fire. - (WINGS FLAPPING) 596 00:22:28,181 --> 00:22:30,057 - ANITA: Pat. Pat, here. Um... - PAT: What? 597 00:22:30,058 --> 00:22:32,768 Do you think I might be able to talk to Shane direct? 598 00:22:32,769 --> 00:22:34,812 It's about the Invisible Jackhammer. 599 00:22:34,813 --> 00:22:37,231 Shane's just made the incredibly painful decision 600 00:22:37,232 --> 00:22:40,234 - to mothball The Sister Squad. - PAT: Production was in chaos. 601 00:22:40,235 --> 00:22:42,695 Writers were being hired to do pre-writes on rewrites 602 00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:44,947 - that hadn't even come in yet. - It's canned? The whole movie? 603 00:22:44,948 --> 00:22:46,657 It's like when you have a beautiful dog, 604 00:22:46,658 --> 00:22:49,326 but you have to smash its head in with a hammer due to, uh... 605 00:22:49,327 --> 00:22:52,079 - Circumstances? - PAT: Exactly, circumstances. 606 00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:55,290 Strategic pivot from way, way upstairs. 607 00:22:55,291 --> 00:22:57,418 Fewer releases. 608 00:22:57,419 --> 00:22:59,336 Seems we gave the fans too much content, 609 00:22:59,337 --> 00:23:01,255 they choked on it. (CHUCKLES) 610 00:23:01,256 --> 00:23:03,132 BRYSON: Hey, Todd, let's aim for the eyes. 611 00:23:03,133 --> 00:23:04,967 We really need to send a message here. 612 00:23:04,968 --> 00:23:07,011 - ANITA: But I'm okay, right? - (WINGS FLAPPING) 613 00:23:07,012 --> 00:23:09,138 ANITA: I mean, you know, in terms of my position? 614 00:23:09,139 --> 00:23:10,973 Well, Anita, you should probably know 615 00:23:10,974 --> 00:23:13,601 Shane's never been a hundred percent on Tecto. 616 00:23:14,185 --> 00:23:15,144 Excuse me? 617 00:23:15,145 --> 00:23:17,146 Yeah, he got addicted to announcing stuff. 618 00:23:17,147 --> 00:23:18,856 He went on a hot streak at Comic-Con 619 00:23:18,857 --> 00:23:20,357 and nobody told him no. 620 00:23:20,358 --> 00:23:21,692 - Now, here you are. - ANITA: But, wait-- 621 00:23:21,693 --> 00:23:24,403 Todd? Super important that we get this cleared. If I may? 622 00:23:24,404 --> 00:23:27,656 ANITA: This is on Deadline, okay? My name is attached. 623 00:23:27,657 --> 00:23:30,701 I turned down Sofia fucking Coppola to be here. 624 00:23:30,702 --> 00:23:34,663 PAT: Okay. But then we offered you a salary you couldn't refuse. You know? 625 00:23:34,664 --> 00:23:36,540 Listen to me. Look at me. Look at me. 626 00:23:36,541 --> 00:23:38,667 We have the utmost confidence in you. 627 00:23:38,668 --> 00:23:41,545 Your movie will be released, okay? 628 00:23:41,546 --> 00:23:43,213 If it's a fucking disaster, 629 00:23:43,214 --> 00:23:44,923 and I strongly feel it will not be, 630 00:23:44,924 --> 00:23:48,010 I want to tell you, on my honor as a Hollywood producer, 631 00:23:48,011 --> 00:23:50,930 there's no way we'd pin this on you, okay? No way. 632 00:23:51,973 --> 00:23:54,058 Not how I operate. 633 00:23:54,059 --> 00:23:56,518 - Incredibly reassuring, Pat. - PAT: Glad to hear it. 634 00:23:56,519 --> 00:23:57,644 (WINGS FLAPPING) 635 00:23:57,645 --> 00:23:59,772 - PAT: Thanks, Anita. - ANITA: Thanks, Pat. 636 00:23:59,773 --> 00:24:02,691 BRYSON: Boom. That is a direct and humane hit. 637 00:24:02,692 --> 00:24:04,360 - PAT: Nice. - BRYSON: (GASPS) The nest. 638 00:24:04,361 --> 00:24:06,779 PAT: Bryson, light it up. Blind those fucking birdies. 639 00:24:06,780 --> 00:24:08,782 - So, can we lose the Jackhammer? - The what? 640 00:24:09,324 --> 00:24:10,575 ADAM: It's hammer time! 641 00:24:13,244 --> 00:24:15,371 Whoo! We got it! 642 00:24:15,372 --> 00:24:16,872 - ERIC: Cut! - ADAM: Fuck you, Ipsen! 643 00:24:16,873 --> 00:24:19,458 - Actually, once the CG is in... - Yeah, I was gonna say, once it's graded... 644 00:24:19,459 --> 00:24:21,377 - ...and you're in the story... - ...and you've got all the sound effects... 645 00:24:21,378 --> 00:24:24,380 - ...and you'll have the color correct, and... - ...and all the VFX, and... 646 00:24:24,381 --> 00:24:25,715 Yeah, I don't mind it. 647 00:24:28,134 --> 00:24:30,052 - Okay. Happiness, Eric? - Happiness. 648 00:24:30,053 --> 00:24:31,387 - Happiness. - Happiness. 649 00:24:31,388 --> 00:24:32,888 Pending Shane's happiness. 650 00:24:32,889 --> 00:24:34,098 Still couldn't hear. 651 00:24:34,099 --> 00:24:36,767 Okay, everyone, we are moving on. 652 00:24:36,768 --> 00:24:40,271 (FILM CREW CHATTERING) 653 00:24:46,152 --> 00:24:50,322 Imagine plummeting to our deaths. Big news story. 654 00:24:50,323 --> 00:24:52,826 Then we'd see whose fucking name comes first. 655 00:24:54,744 --> 00:24:56,161 Guys! 656 00:24:56,162 --> 00:24:58,707 Can we go down? My balls are... I can't feel my balls. 657 00:24:59,332 --> 00:25:00,542 I can't feel my balls. 658 00:25:01,918 --> 00:25:05,005 ♪ (PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 659 00:25:09,926 --> 00:25:12,094 ANITA: Well, it's done now. Onwards. 660 00:25:12,095 --> 00:25:14,596 I just want this to be a good film. 661 00:25:14,597 --> 00:25:17,016 Smart people working hard. 662 00:25:17,017 --> 00:25:20,894 - Yeah, I think we all want that. - But like a really good one. 663 00:25:20,895 --> 00:25:23,231 Because when you make movies like this, but good, 664 00:25:23,898 --> 00:25:25,774 there's nothing better. 665 00:25:25,775 --> 00:25:27,694 Plus, decent gig. Baby needs shoes. 666 00:25:28,945 --> 00:25:29,946 Are we good? 667 00:25:31,031 --> 00:25:33,574 (CLICKS TONGUE) Dan, as your producer, we are great. 668 00:25:33,575 --> 00:25:35,035 We are in great shape. 669 00:25:35,869 --> 00:25:37,620 - DANIEL: Okay. - As your friend, 670 00:25:37,996 --> 00:25:39,788 Rome is burning. 671 00:25:39,789 --> 00:25:42,249 Walls are tumbling down and careers are being destroyed. 672 00:25:42,250 --> 00:25:44,752 Daniel, if you care too much about this job it will kill you. 673 00:25:44,753 --> 00:25:48,297 We are not at war... but we're at war. 674 00:25:48,298 --> 00:25:50,550 ♪ (TENSE MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 675 00:25:51,593 --> 00:25:54,303 (LAUGHS) Fucking with you. 676 00:25:54,304 --> 00:25:56,181 Yeah. Everything's great. 677 00:25:57,223 --> 00:26:00,267 Nothing to worry about. Night, Dan. 678 00:26:00,268 --> 00:26:03,355 JAZ: Mollusk Man traveling. Can someone de-rig his diaper? Over. 679 00:26:05,732 --> 00:26:08,567 Ooh, well, that's a wrappy on the nappy. 680 00:26:08,568 --> 00:26:11,237 "I am big. It's the nappies that got small." 681 00:26:12,989 --> 00:26:15,324 Actually, I've got quite a long car journey home. 682 00:26:15,325 --> 00:26:16,534 I'll just leave it on. 683 00:26:19,537 --> 00:26:24,542 ♪ (TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING) ♪ 684 00:26:25,835 --> 00:26:27,711 INTERVIEWER: What's it like working with Adam? 685 00:26:27,712 --> 00:26:29,214 (CHUCKLES) Adam? 686 00:26:30,548 --> 00:26:35,636 Adam, he's instinctual, like a bear or a hog. 687 00:26:35,637 --> 00:26:37,680 And I say this with, you know, respect. 688 00:26:37,681 --> 00:26:39,515 It's like working with a chimpanzee, 689 00:26:39,516 --> 00:26:42,893 which I've done twice, actually, once with tragic consequences. 690 00:26:42,894 --> 00:26:45,354 Awful story. Bong-Bong was his name. 691 00:26:45,355 --> 00:26:47,022 They caught him one day stealing donuts 692 00:26:47,023 --> 00:26:49,358 from the craft services, which one must never do. 693 00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:51,694 And so his owner, in an attempt to chide him, 694 00:26:51,695 --> 00:26:54,363 ended up beating him to death with an axe handle. 695 00:26:54,364 --> 00:26:56,865 Terrible, terrible, and very messy. 696 00:26:56,866 --> 00:26:58,951 Obviously, there was no chance of the chimp doing any press 697 00:26:58,952 --> 00:27:00,786 or publicity to promote the movie after that. 698 00:27:00,787 --> 00:27:02,371 How could he? He was dead. 699 00:27:02,372 --> 00:27:05,874 So in the end, they brought in a second chimp to do Carson. 700 00:27:05,875 --> 00:27:08,585 Rum-Tum, I think it was. 701 00:27:08,586 --> 00:27:10,087 Anyway, the whole press campaign 702 00:27:10,088 --> 00:27:12,047 was a bit of a washout after that. 703 00:27:12,048 --> 00:27:13,382 I often think that's why 704 00:27:13,383 --> 00:27:15,426 the movie never found an audience. 705 00:27:15,427 --> 00:27:17,886 Screenplay was terrific. 706 00:27:17,887 --> 00:27:20,389 "Do You Take This Chimp?," it was called. 707 00:27:20,390 --> 00:27:23,601 David Mamet did an uncredited polish. 708 00:27:24,477 --> 00:27:26,395 Bong-Bong. 709 00:27:26,396 --> 00:27:31,442 Oh, I haven't thought about poor little bugger for 30 years. 710 00:27:31,443 --> 00:27:33,737 (SIGHS) Oh... 711 00:27:34,988 --> 00:27:36,698 Or David Mamet, for that matter. 712 00:27:37,741 --> 00:27:40,410 ♪ (MUSIC FADES) ♪