1 00:00:46,047 --> 00:00:47,716 How are you feeling? 2 00:00:48,383 --> 00:00:51,094 I'm very tired. 3 00:00:52,387 --> 00:00:54,222 Do you want to do your morning meds? 4 00:00:55,724 --> 00:00:59,394 I know the answer, but… you should. 5 00:01:03,815 --> 00:01:05,065 Morning, Selena. 6 00:01:08,111 --> 00:01:09,613 Let me make a promise. 7 00:01:11,323 --> 00:01:13,658 I'll only tell you my darkest secrets. 8 00:01:19,497 --> 00:01:20,832 December 19. 9 00:01:22,918 --> 00:01:25,003 I have to stop living like this. 10 00:01:27,464 --> 00:01:29,841 Why have I become so far from the light? 11 00:01:33,637 --> 00:01:38,516 Everything I ever wished for, I've had and done all of it… 12 00:01:44,898 --> 00:01:46,316 but it has killed me. 13 00:01:49,402 --> 00:01:52,155 Because there's always Selena. 14 00:01:52,239 --> 00:01:54,783 Selena! 15 00:02:07,837 --> 00:02:10,048 Selena Gomez, the lead single, "Good For You," 16 00:02:10,131 --> 00:02:11,591 was a critical and commercial success. 17 00:02:11,675 --> 00:02:14,344 …recently dubbed the queen of the social networking app. 18 00:02:14,427 --> 00:02:15,679 Hello, Howard. 19 00:02:15,762 --> 00:02:17,389 Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber 20 00:02:17,472 --> 00:02:19,391 -have finally called it quits. -Again? 21 00:02:19,474 --> 00:02:20,892 Really? I don't feel like a rock star. 22 00:02:20,976 --> 00:02:23,103 And this album, Revival, 23 00:02:23,186 --> 00:02:26,314 people are saying that it's going to be number one, 24 00:02:26,398 --> 00:02:28,525 and the tour starts up soon, right? In May? 25 00:02:28,608 --> 00:02:30,151 I'll be touring in May. 26 00:02:31,403 --> 00:02:34,155 I'm actually at the LA Sports Arena. 27 00:02:34,239 --> 00:02:40,954 We have two days till I leave and the tour starts. 28 00:02:41,037 --> 00:02:45,083 I have my hair and makeup team with me, so we're trying new things every day. 29 00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:47,961 And we're doing tests and figuring out what-- You know, 30 00:02:48,044 --> 00:02:50,714 what we're going to do for the show. The identity of the show. 31 00:02:50,797 --> 00:02:52,465 Do we like this? 32 00:02:53,216 --> 00:02:55,385 'Cause you see through the mirror with the white? 33 00:02:57,762 --> 00:02:59,347 I think it's just the sequins. 34 00:02:59,431 --> 00:03:02,434 Let me take-- I'll take a little bit from the center. Right. 35 00:03:02,517 --> 00:03:04,477 They even have those little vagina things? 36 00:03:04,561 --> 00:03:06,855 -Okay. Yeah. -Maybe those flattened ones. 37 00:03:06,938 --> 00:03:09,399 I don't know. Just got weird. 38 00:03:10,191 --> 00:03:13,987 If I was a guy, I could wear jeans and just switch up my T-shirt 39 00:03:14,070 --> 00:03:15,989 and put a beanie on 40 00:03:16,072 --> 00:03:18,116 and nobody would care. 41 00:03:18,950 --> 00:03:20,785 Actually, I think the breasts are good. 42 00:03:22,078 --> 00:03:23,371 -I don't know. -You like it? 43 00:03:23,455 --> 00:03:25,290 -I do need a little breast. -So formal, "the breasts." 44 00:03:25,373 --> 00:03:26,374 It's my vagina… 45 00:03:26,458 --> 00:03:28,919 -No, it's not. It's just-- -…in every freaking costume. 46 00:03:29,002 --> 00:03:29,920 -It's not you… -It's-- 47 00:03:30,003 --> 00:03:32,714 -…I'm just making fun of myself. -Wait. Come and look here. 48 00:03:32,797 --> 00:03:35,425 -It's not you, it's my vagina. -Literally. It's my vagina. 49 00:03:36,176 --> 00:03:41,264 I wanna have the body to wear it proudly, and I want the booty that I don't have. 50 00:03:41,348 --> 00:03:43,308 -My body's very young. -Yeah. 51 00:03:43,391 --> 00:03:46,394 I don't wanna be like, "Oh, wait." 52 00:03:46,478 --> 00:03:50,440 Making sure I look like a woman and not like a twelve-year-old boy. 53 00:03:57,656 --> 00:03:59,783 I wouldn't wanna be anybody else 54 00:04:00,909 --> 00:04:02,035 Yeah 55 00:04:04,246 --> 00:04:06,581 You made me insecure 56 00:04:06,665 --> 00:04:09,000 Told me I wasn't good enough 57 00:04:09,084 --> 00:04:13,755 But who are you to judge When you're a diamond in the rough? 58 00:04:13,838 --> 00:04:18,509 I'm sure you got some things You'd like to change about yourself 59 00:04:18,593 --> 00:04:23,473 But when it comes to me I wouldn't wanna be anybody else 60 00:04:23,557 --> 00:04:25,100 Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na, Na-na-na-na-na 61 00:04:25,183 --> 00:04:27,602 Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na, Na-na-na-na-na 62 00:04:27,686 --> 00:04:32,399 I'm no beauty queen, I'm just beautiful me 63 00:04:32,482 --> 00:04:34,859 Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na 64 00:04:34,943 --> 00:04:37,028 Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na 65 00:04:37,112 --> 00:04:41,366 And you've got every right To a beautiful life 66 00:04:41,449 --> 00:04:42,993 Come on Who says? 67 00:04:43,076 --> 00:04:47,914 Who says you're not perfect? Who says you're not worth it? 68 00:04:47,998 --> 00:04:51,209 Who says You're the only one that's hurtin'? 69 00:04:51,293 --> 00:04:54,713 Trust me That's the price of beauty 70 00:04:54,796 --> 00:04:57,424 Who says you're not pretty? 71 00:04:57,507 --> 00:05:00,135 Who says you're not beautiful? 72 00:05:00,218 --> 00:05:02,804 Who says? 73 00:05:08,894 --> 00:05:12,772 The dress is too long 74 00:05:13,273 --> 00:05:16,776 And I hate how it opens up 75 00:05:22,032 --> 00:05:23,366 It just sucks. 76 00:05:24,576 --> 00:05:28,288 -What's wrong? -All of it. It looks so bad. 77 00:05:28,371 --> 00:05:29,706 I'm just like-- 78 00:05:30,206 --> 00:05:33,126 I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. 79 00:05:33,209 --> 00:05:36,713 -What part did you feel that? -From the beginning. 80 00:05:36,796 --> 00:05:41,218 So I get the voice that comes in my head that says that you missed this. 81 00:05:41,301 --> 00:05:42,844 That sucked. That suck. 82 00:05:42,928 --> 00:05:44,638 You get a glimpse of yourself on the screen. 83 00:05:44,721 --> 00:05:46,932 Wow, that looks pretty fucking shitty. 84 00:05:47,015 --> 00:05:50,268 And then I'm sitting there and I trip over the clothes 85 00:05:50,352 --> 00:05:51,770 and, like, this is just-- 86 00:05:51,853 --> 00:05:53,688 -Like, it sucks the life out of me… -Yeah. 87 00:05:53,772 --> 00:05:55,649 …and I don't want to perform. 88 00:05:55,732 --> 00:06:00,695 The pressure is just overwhelming because I wanna do the best I can 89 00:06:00,779 --> 00:06:04,074 and I'm not-- I don't-- 90 00:06:04,157 --> 00:06:05,533 I don't know what John thinks. 91 00:06:05,617 --> 00:06:09,704 I wanna talk to John 'cause I'm like-- I don't want to disappoint John. 92 00:06:09,788 --> 00:06:13,458 I don't want him to think that he signed some fucking Disney kid, like-- 93 00:06:13,541 --> 00:06:14,584 John was standing there, like, 94 00:06:14,668 --> 00:06:16,002 -smiling ear to ear. -John was excited. 95 00:06:16,086 --> 00:06:17,170 It is in your head. 96 00:06:17,254 --> 00:06:20,715 It just sucks too, 'cause, like, the whole song thing. 97 00:06:20,799 --> 00:06:23,843 He called me this morning about the song with Justin, 98 00:06:23,927 --> 00:06:26,012 -and I was like… -The DJ thing, hmm? 99 00:06:26,096 --> 00:06:28,974 "Like, when am I gonna just be good enough by myself?" 100 00:06:29,057 --> 00:06:32,060 -Just don't worry about that. -Like, when am I gonna be-- like-- 101 00:06:32,686 --> 00:06:35,480 When am I gonna be good just by myself? 102 00:06:35,564 --> 00:06:38,525 Not needing anybody to be associated with. 103 00:06:38,608 --> 00:06:40,527 -Like, it's so fu-- -You already are. 104 00:06:40,610 --> 00:06:41,695 Hi, John. 105 00:06:42,612 --> 00:06:45,824 -I'm so sorry. -What are you sorry about? 106 00:06:45,907 --> 00:06:48,618 I just, like, I don't want you to ever regret signing me… 107 00:06:48,702 --> 00:06:51,288 -What? -…or feeling like you need something-- 108 00:06:51,371 --> 00:06:54,207 -You were amazing. -We were both standing next to you. 109 00:06:54,291 --> 00:06:56,626 The costume looked bad. Everything looked so bad. 110 00:06:56,710 --> 00:06:58,670 You were amazing. I thought it was awesome. 111 00:06:58,753 --> 00:07:00,797 Can I have a hug? I'll give you a hug. 112 00:07:01,381 --> 00:07:03,300 I thought you were amazing. It was so good. 113 00:07:03,383 --> 00:07:05,552 -Really. -"Me and My Girls" was crazy. Like the-- 114 00:07:05,635 --> 00:07:08,179 That's it. John was standing there like this. John was like-- 115 00:07:08,263 --> 00:07:10,015 I was rocking out to it. It was awesome. 116 00:07:10,098 --> 00:07:11,600 Does it feel young? 117 00:07:11,683 --> 00:07:13,101 -It doesn't feel young. -No. 118 00:07:13,184 --> 00:07:17,147 I do-- I want nothing more than to not be my past. 119 00:07:17,230 --> 00:07:18,815 And it comes back. 120 00:07:18,899 --> 00:07:20,567 You're your own worst enemy right now. 121 00:07:20,650 --> 00:07:25,322 When you get all into your head and it's, like, you can't let it spiral you. 122 00:07:25,405 --> 00:07:26,740 -Costumes can change. -Yeah. 123 00:07:26,823 --> 00:07:28,283 Lights can change. Sets can change. 124 00:07:28,366 --> 00:07:30,702 You wanna get rid of the stage, you can perform on the floor. 125 00:07:30,785 --> 00:07:33,455 What people like and don't like doesn't matter. You have to like it. 126 00:07:33,538 --> 00:07:35,415 You have to feel good about it. It's your show. 127 00:07:36,124 --> 00:07:38,001 Don't beat yourself up over it. It's gonna be great. 128 00:07:39,544 --> 00:07:41,504 -John, thank you. -It's great seeing you. 129 00:07:41,588 --> 00:07:43,715 -Sorry. Thank you. Sorry. -I'll see you soon. 130 00:07:43,798 --> 00:07:46,009 Thank you. No. It really is great. 131 00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:47,594 Thank you. 132 00:08:01,608 --> 00:08:02,651 I'm sorry. 133 00:08:07,197 --> 00:08:08,448 It's just too much. 134 00:08:18,917 --> 00:08:20,210 They're coming. 135 00:08:42,315 --> 00:08:43,733 -Theresa? -Hey, girl. 136 00:08:43,817 --> 00:08:46,319 -Did you bring my blood pressure machine? -Yeah. It's right here. 137 00:08:46,403 --> 00:08:48,154 This is for your lupus, right? 138 00:08:48,238 --> 00:08:49,239 Yep. 139 00:08:51,199 --> 00:08:53,785 Now do I press it? Just start? 140 00:08:59,082 --> 00:09:00,542 -That's good, right? -Perfect. 141 00:09:01,042 --> 00:09:02,043 How do you know? 142 00:09:02,127 --> 00:09:05,005 So, 109 over 78 is really good. 143 00:09:05,088 --> 00:09:10,093 The average, what you would probably have, is 120 over 78. 144 00:09:10,176 --> 00:09:11,803 But when my blood pressure is high, 145 00:09:11,887 --> 00:09:18,727 it's usually 150, 145 to the bottom number being a hundred, 146 00:09:18,810 --> 00:09:21,021 which means I could have a stroke. 147 00:09:22,022 --> 00:09:23,356 Got it. 148 00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:27,152 -So as long as it stays under 120-- -Should we keep this in here for tour? 149 00:09:27,861 --> 00:09:28,862 Like, in your little… 150 00:09:28,945 --> 00:09:30,780 -I mean, maybe on the bus. -Okay. 151 00:09:30,864 --> 00:09:32,908 It probably should be wherever we are, just in case. 152 00:09:33,700 --> 00:09:36,202 We have a gift for you, and then we're gonna leave you alone. 153 00:09:36,786 --> 00:09:38,288 Can you start with this? 154 00:09:38,371 --> 00:09:39,372 This is from me and Zack. 155 00:09:41,249 --> 00:09:44,502 This is something we've collected for you, for tour. 156 00:09:44,586 --> 00:09:46,004 What is this? 157 00:09:46,087 --> 00:09:50,300 Every day, it's a good luck charm word for that night 158 00:09:50,383 --> 00:09:51,801 and that you're going to be thinking of… 159 00:09:51,885 --> 00:09:53,428 You put it on your makeup table. 160 00:09:53,511 --> 00:09:56,097 …for you. And every show is a different one. 161 00:09:56,181 --> 00:09:58,642 -That's so kind. -Oh, my gosh. 162 00:09:58,725 --> 00:10:00,352 -So, look at these. -So sweet. 163 00:10:00,435 --> 00:10:01,853 It kind of made us cry. 164 00:10:03,021 --> 00:10:04,648 Every day you'll choose one. 165 00:10:04,731 --> 00:10:06,775 -That is so beautiful. -Isn't that cool? 166 00:10:06,858 --> 00:10:08,902 -Thank you so much. -We love you so much. 167 00:10:09,778 --> 00:10:11,154 So, my question to you is, 168 00:10:11,238 --> 00:10:14,115 do you feel like you have too many meet and greets? 169 00:10:14,199 --> 00:10:16,701 They have about an hour and a half scheduled. 170 00:10:16,785 --> 00:10:18,203 I don't think it will take that long. 171 00:10:18,286 --> 00:10:20,288 -What do you think? -Sometimes they milk it. 172 00:10:20,372 --> 00:10:23,333 -It's my birthday. -It is? Happy birthday. 173 00:10:23,416 --> 00:10:24,542 -Thank you. -How old are you? 174 00:10:24,626 --> 00:10:26,962 -I'm 13. -Oh, Mylanta. 175 00:10:27,045 --> 00:10:30,006 I've been celebrating your birthday every year since I was three. 176 00:10:30,090 --> 00:10:31,091 -My birthday? -I've had bi-- 177 00:10:31,174 --> 00:10:33,969 I have birthday parties, cakes, playlists, everything. 178 00:10:34,052 --> 00:10:36,888 -You're so sweet. Thank you. -Can we get a picture? 179 00:10:36,972 --> 00:10:37,973 -There we go. -So exci-- 180 00:10:38,056 --> 00:10:39,641 -Three, two. -Yes. Let's do it. 181 00:10:40,892 --> 00:10:42,435 -So pretty. -Hey, don't cry. 182 00:10:44,604 --> 00:10:45,564 Got it. 183 00:10:45,647 --> 00:10:47,774 And can you put, "Bae number one," right there? 184 00:10:47,857 --> 00:10:50,986 Okay. 185 00:10:53,113 --> 00:10:55,198 Yeah. I got, like, different girls. 186 00:10:57,701 --> 00:10:59,578 -I'm a-- -I could be number one? 187 00:10:59,661 --> 00:11:01,997 -Yeah. -Yeah, okay. 188 00:11:05,333 --> 00:11:08,295 These two have heard some really inappropriate things. 189 00:11:09,421 --> 00:11:14,467 …was Hallelujah Hallelu-- 190 00:11:14,551 --> 00:11:17,429 Thank you guys so much for how hard all of you worked. 191 00:11:17,512 --> 00:11:21,349 It means more to me than you can even imagine. 192 00:11:21,433 --> 00:11:23,643 This is the most important tour I've ever done, 193 00:11:23,727 --> 00:11:26,021 which is why I've been a mess every day, so that you know. 194 00:11:26,104 --> 00:11:29,733 I hope we just go out there, inspire people, have so much fun. 195 00:11:29,816 --> 00:11:33,778 And bless our feet, our hands, our instruments, everything. 196 00:11:33,862 --> 00:11:35,697 Our lights, Baz, Melissa, everyone. 197 00:11:35,780 --> 00:11:38,533 -I love you guys. In Jesus's name. Amen. -Amen! 198 00:11:46,958 --> 00:11:49,836 Ooh, the heat's a common ground 199 00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:53,548 No matter what's your history 200 00:11:53,632 --> 00:11:56,092 Be free with me, oh 201 00:11:56,176 --> 00:12:00,513 And everybody wants to be touched Everybody wants to get some 202 00:12:00,597 --> 00:12:03,099 But don't you play a song about love 203 00:12:03,767 --> 00:12:05,268 When I move my body 204 00:12:05,352 --> 00:12:07,395 I don't have to talk about none 205 00:12:07,479 --> 00:12:09,564 Let the chemicals do its stuff 206 00:12:09,648 --> 00:12:12,275 Till the energy is too much 207 00:12:12,359 --> 00:12:13,401 Oh 208 00:12:13,485 --> 00:12:17,989 Yeah, all I need 209 00:12:18,073 --> 00:12:20,200 Is the rhythm, oh oh 210 00:12:20,283 --> 00:12:21,910 Me and the rhythm 211 00:12:21,993 --> 00:12:27,123 Oh oh, nothing between 212 00:12:27,207 --> 00:12:29,334 Yeah, the rhythm, oh oh 213 00:12:29,417 --> 00:12:32,003 Me and the rhythm, oh oh 214 00:12:32,087 --> 00:12:34,047 Who said, who said? 215 00:12:34,130 --> 00:12:36,633 Would you tell me who said that? 216 00:12:36,716 --> 00:12:39,094 Yeah, who said? 217 00:12:39,177 --> 00:12:42,639 Who says? Who says you're not perfect? 218 00:12:42,722 --> 00:12:45,141 Who says you're not worth it? 219 00:12:45,225 --> 00:12:48,353 Who says You're the only one that's hurtin'? 220 00:12:48,436 --> 00:12:51,815 Trust me, that's the price of beauty 221 00:12:51,898 --> 00:12:54,651 Who says you're not pretty? 222 00:12:54,734 --> 00:12:57,279 Who says you're not beautiful? 223 00:12:57,362 --> 00:12:59,364 Who says? 224 00:13:00,365 --> 00:13:01,616 Fuck. 225 00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:05,161 Hey, Selena! 226 00:13:05,245 --> 00:13:07,497 We're by Big Ben. What's up? 227 00:13:08,999 --> 00:13:11,877 Me and my girls, me and my girls 228 00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:16,965 Me and my, me and my Me and my, me and my girls 229 00:13:22,387 --> 00:13:24,764 There were rumors that she had a drug problem-- 230 00:13:24,848 --> 00:13:27,434 Selena parties too much. She's outta control. 231 00:13:29,686 --> 00:13:30,562 Let's go! 232 00:13:33,315 --> 00:13:35,650 I am about to go onstage. 233 00:13:35,734 --> 00:13:36,776 Wish me luck. 234 00:13:38,028 --> 00:13:41,781 You don't know how to love me When you're sober 235 00:13:42,657 --> 00:13:45,452 When the bottle's done you pull me… 236 00:13:45,535 --> 00:13:46,453 Selena, I love you. 237 00:13:46,536 --> 00:13:48,580 Did Justin Bieber make you go to rehab? 238 00:13:48,663 --> 00:13:50,248 Justin has a new girlfriend. 239 00:13:50,332 --> 00:13:52,208 Are you jealous, Selena? 240 00:13:52,292 --> 00:13:54,044 I'm so sick of that same old love 241 00:13:54,127 --> 00:13:55,503 Selena. Did you go back to drinking? 242 00:13:55,587 --> 00:13:58,215 -Selena. Where's the alcohol? -Did you start drinking again? 243 00:13:59,299 --> 00:14:01,092 Sing it. 244 00:14:01,176 --> 00:14:03,553 I'm so sick of that same old love 245 00:14:03,637 --> 00:14:05,597 That shit, it tears me up 246 00:14:08,433 --> 00:14:09,893 -I was dying. -Yeah. 247 00:14:09,976 --> 00:14:12,020 What am I missing? Like, what do I need? 248 00:14:12,103 --> 00:14:13,855 Everyone was on their feet… 249 00:14:13,939 --> 00:14:16,900 Guys, there's too many people. I'm so sorry. Too many people. 250 00:14:16,983 --> 00:14:18,693 -Stop analyzing. -No. 251 00:14:18,777 --> 00:14:20,403 -Be happy. -I am happy. 252 00:14:21,446 --> 00:14:22,781 I hate it. 253 00:14:25,992 --> 00:14:28,119 It's just hard being a fucking girl 254 00:14:28,203 --> 00:14:29,412 and being crazy already. 255 00:14:29,496 --> 00:14:31,039 That's another thing that pissed me off. 256 00:14:31,122 --> 00:14:32,374 I'm doing the quick change, 257 00:14:32,457 --> 00:14:35,210 then rip goes one sleeve, and then rip goes the other one, 258 00:14:35,293 --> 00:14:37,587 and then all my entire bottom half ripped. 259 00:14:37,671 --> 00:14:41,049 Oh, that… 260 00:14:41,132 --> 00:14:42,425 How are you feeling about Justin? 261 00:14:42,509 --> 00:14:43,760 Are you depressed? 262 00:14:43,843 --> 00:14:45,804 -Are you tired? -She's always tired. 263 00:14:55,605 --> 00:15:01,069 Sometimes I wake up, and I don't really feel like I have it in me. 264 00:15:12,831 --> 00:15:14,541 Selena is now on break, 265 00:15:14,624 --> 00:15:17,377 dealing with anxiety, panic attacks, and depression. 266 00:15:17,460 --> 00:15:19,671 There were rumors that she had a drug problem. 267 00:15:19,754 --> 00:15:22,007 Letting the high life of celebrity and partying 268 00:15:22,090 --> 00:15:24,384 get the best of her and her career. 269 00:15:25,886 --> 00:15:29,222 At one point, she's like, "I don't wanna be alive right now. 270 00:15:29,806 --> 00:15:30,807 I don't wanna live." 271 00:15:30,891 --> 00:15:33,977 And I'm like, "Wait. What?" 272 00:15:35,061 --> 00:15:36,187 And it was one of those moments 273 00:15:36,271 --> 00:15:38,273 where you look in her eyes and there's nothing there. 274 00:15:38,356 --> 00:15:41,860 It was just pitch black, and it's so scary. 275 00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:43,737 You're like, "Okay, fuck this. 276 00:15:43,820 --> 00:15:46,448 Like, this needs to end, like, we need to go home." 277 00:15:46,531 --> 00:15:49,451 We had to have a serious conversation with her of, like, 278 00:15:49,534 --> 00:15:50,952 "What is going on?" 279 00:15:51,036 --> 00:15:55,248 Her answer was also like, "I don't know. I can't explain it. 280 00:15:55,874 --> 00:15:59,085 I wish you could feel what it feels like to be in my head." 281 00:15:59,961 --> 00:16:03,965 I just remember it being very chaotic and she was hearing all of these voices. 282 00:16:04,633 --> 00:16:07,385 They just kept getting louder and louder and louder. 283 00:16:07,886 --> 00:16:10,680 That triggered some sort of psychotic break. 284 00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:15,977 Selena Gomez has been in dire straits for a couple of weeks now. 285 00:16:16,061 --> 00:16:20,315 Last year, she was battling lupus, and the kidney transplant saved her life. 286 00:16:20,398 --> 00:16:21,399 As a result of that, 287 00:16:21,483 --> 00:16:25,362 she had a very low white blood cell count in the last week of September. 288 00:16:25,445 --> 00:16:29,366 Purely a medical situation, but it turned into an emotional breakdown. 289 00:16:29,449 --> 00:16:31,868 She was trying to rip her IVs out. 290 00:16:31,952 --> 00:16:35,205 And it was so bad, they ended up taking her to a psychiatric hospital. 291 00:16:36,289 --> 00:16:41,169 We heard about her mental breakdown through TMZ. 292 00:16:41,253 --> 00:16:43,755 They called me and wanted to know 293 00:16:43,838 --> 00:16:48,552 what my daughter was doing in the hospital with a nervous breakdown. 294 00:16:48,635 --> 00:16:51,388 She didn't want anything to do with me, 295 00:16:51,471 --> 00:16:56,268 and I was scared she was gonna die. 296 00:16:57,477 --> 00:16:59,563 If anybody saw what I saw 297 00:16:59,646 --> 00:17:02,107 and the state that she was in at the mental hospital, 298 00:17:02,190 --> 00:17:05,569 they wouldn't have recognized her at all. 299 00:17:06,069 --> 00:17:08,029 And I was devastated 300 00:17:08,112 --> 00:17:12,449 because psychosis can last from days, to weeks, to months, 301 00:17:12,534 --> 00:17:14,452 to years, to life. 302 00:17:17,414 --> 00:17:21,834 You hang on as tight as you can and try to help them with their treatment, 303 00:17:21,918 --> 00:17:24,588 and that's the hardest thing to do, 304 00:17:25,338 --> 00:17:29,593 to then just go to bed and hope that they wake up the next day. 305 00:17:37,309 --> 00:17:39,895 My thoughts take over my mind often. 306 00:17:41,479 --> 00:17:43,773 It hurts when I think about my past. 307 00:17:47,777 --> 00:17:49,821 I wanna know how to breathe again. 308 00:17:51,948 --> 00:17:53,533 Do I love my own self? 309 00:17:55,660 --> 00:17:58,496 How do I learn how to breathe my own breath? 310 00:18:03,001 --> 00:18:05,003 It's a miracle she got out, 311 00:18:05,921 --> 00:18:09,841 but there's always that fear that that's gonna happen again, 312 00:18:09,925 --> 00:18:11,593 and it hurt us so much. 313 00:18:22,479 --> 00:18:26,441 I found out I have a diagnosis of bipolar disorder. 314 00:18:29,694 --> 00:18:30,946 I'm gonna be honest, 315 00:18:31,029 --> 00:18:33,365 I didn't wanna go to a mental health hospital. 316 00:18:33,448 --> 00:18:34,574 I didn't want to, 317 00:18:35,158 --> 00:18:40,747 but I didn't want to be trapped in myself-- In my mind anymore. 318 00:18:41,414 --> 00:18:44,668 I thought my life was over. I was like, "This is how I'm gonna be forever." 319 00:18:46,795 --> 00:18:50,966 That's why I say to people that I have the greatest friends and family, 320 00:18:52,175 --> 00:18:54,678 especially my mom and my stepdad, Brian. 321 00:18:55,345 --> 00:19:00,850 Because I shouldn't have spoken to them the way that I did, 322 00:19:00,934 --> 00:19:04,521 and I shouldn't have treated them the way that I did sometimes. 323 00:19:05,272 --> 00:19:06,856 And then they know it wasn't me, 324 00:19:06,940 --> 00:19:09,317 so then when I wake up the next day, they're like-- 325 00:19:10,443 --> 00:19:13,697 They tell me what happened, but they're-- They explain to me-- 326 00:19:13,780 --> 00:19:17,200 They're like, "Look, we know that that's not you talking, 327 00:19:17,284 --> 00:19:22,831 and we're really concerned, and-- You know, just know that we love you. 328 00:19:22,914 --> 00:19:28,211 We don't see anything different from what was-- Last night to now." 329 00:19:29,796 --> 00:19:31,339 But if I talk about it to them, 330 00:19:31,423 --> 00:19:33,842 then I just say it over and over again, you know? 331 00:19:33,925 --> 00:19:35,343 I say, "I'm so sorry." 332 00:19:36,344 --> 00:19:38,680 'Cause I remember certain things that I did 333 00:19:38,763 --> 00:19:41,600 and I was really so mean. 334 00:19:42,183 --> 00:19:46,229 And so, like-- Even to this day, I keep saying "Thank you," and "I'm sorry," 335 00:19:46,313 --> 00:19:47,647 and everything that I do-- 336 00:19:47,731 --> 00:19:51,693 And they are always like, "Once we found out everything, 337 00:19:51,776 --> 00:19:53,486 it made so much sense, Selena. 338 00:19:53,570 --> 00:19:56,364 Like, you're the best that you've ever been, 339 00:19:56,448 --> 00:20:03,038 and we're so happy that we can see that, and we never, ever would give up on you." 340 00:20:03,830 --> 00:20:09,961 And they haven't when, in so many times, they probably should have. 341 00:20:14,591 --> 00:20:17,802 I'm in a better place, but… 342 00:20:20,096 --> 00:20:21,389 I don't know. 343 00:20:21,473 --> 00:20:24,100 I guess sometimes I can't explain it, for sure. 344 00:20:35,695 --> 00:20:36,821 No. 345 00:20:39,658 --> 00:20:40,909 Totally lost. 346 00:20:43,870 --> 00:20:45,413 When I first got out, 347 00:20:45,497 --> 00:20:48,083 I didn't know how I'd cope with my diagnosis. 348 00:20:48,833 --> 00:20:50,585 What if it happened again? 349 00:20:51,586 --> 00:20:53,880 What if the next time I didn't come back? 350 00:20:55,048 --> 00:20:57,050 I needed to keep learning about it. 351 00:20:57,842 --> 00:20:59,761 I needed to take it day-by-day. 352 00:21:01,513 --> 00:21:04,724 When I was a kid, I was terrified of thunderstorms. 353 00:21:05,392 --> 00:21:06,851 I grew up in Texas, 354 00:21:06,935 --> 00:21:10,647 and I was so scared that lightning and thunder would mean a tornado was coming. 355 00:21:11,231 --> 00:21:13,483 But my mom gave me these books for kids 356 00:21:13,567 --> 00:21:16,319 that explained storms and lightning and thunder, 357 00:21:16,403 --> 00:21:18,780 and basically said, "The more you learn about it, 358 00:21:19,364 --> 00:21:21,199 the less you're going to be afraid of it." 359 00:21:21,283 --> 00:21:22,534 And it really helped. 360 00:21:25,620 --> 00:21:26,997 I love you. 361 00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,540 I love you. 362 00:21:29,749 --> 00:21:33,044 You know, my mom was always teaching me not to be scared of life. 363 00:21:33,670 --> 00:21:37,674 -She's such a powerful spirit. -Your nose? Did you hit the door? 364 00:21:38,425 --> 00:21:40,844 She was so young, still in school, 365 00:21:40,927 --> 00:21:43,388 and eventually tried every job you could possibly imagine. 366 00:21:43,471 --> 00:21:44,472 Kiddo. 367 00:21:45,432 --> 00:21:48,268 She said, "This is what we're going through, but I'm not gonna stop. 368 00:21:49,060 --> 00:21:52,188 I'm not gonna give up. I'm gonna make my life better than this." 369 00:21:52,814 --> 00:21:55,108 Oh, here's one. "Stay at home. $145 a day. 370 00:21:55,191 --> 00:21:57,569 Processing mail for local company in your area." 371 00:21:58,194 --> 00:22:00,530 Yeah. Hey, I could do that. 372 00:22:00,614 --> 00:22:01,698 You know, my mom-- 373 00:22:01,781 --> 00:22:03,909 She had me when she was still in high school. 374 00:22:05,327 --> 00:22:06,953 Daddy? 375 00:22:07,037 --> 00:22:09,414 My parents were separated when I was five. 376 00:22:10,999 --> 00:22:14,252 My grandparents, my nana and papa, would look after me when my mom worked. 377 00:22:14,336 --> 00:22:15,921 …that song you were singing about grandpa? 378 00:22:21,009 --> 00:22:22,469 Hi, Daddy. 379 00:22:22,552 --> 00:22:25,764 I can't imagine the pressure for my dad. 380 00:22:25,847 --> 00:22:26,932 I see. 381 00:22:27,015 --> 00:22:28,600 He has a lot of regrets, 382 00:22:28,683 --> 00:22:31,228 and he would be like, "I'm sorry, mi hija. I just-- 383 00:22:31,311 --> 00:22:33,563 I don't know how to talk to you." 384 00:22:34,231 --> 00:22:36,483 But he made me feel 385 00:22:36,566 --> 00:22:41,488 like I was the, like, prettiest young girl. 386 00:22:42,697 --> 00:22:47,202 Like I could do anything, and no one was worthy, and, like-- 387 00:22:49,371 --> 00:22:51,790 So, I miss him a lot… 388 00:22:53,458 --> 00:22:56,461 but he knows that, so… 389 00:22:57,671 --> 00:23:00,715 Take a picture of her, and you're gonna take a picture of us, okay? 390 00:23:00,799 --> 00:23:03,051 -Well, get over there. -Hold on, I'm coming. 391 00:23:03,134 --> 00:23:04,886 I'm gonna take a picture. 392 00:23:05,595 --> 00:23:07,639 Friends forever. 393 00:23:07,722 --> 00:23:09,266 Is that all y'all have got to say? 394 00:23:10,350 --> 00:23:11,685 Okay. 395 00:23:12,352 --> 00:23:13,853 Priscilla is my cousin, 396 00:23:14,479 --> 00:23:17,899 probably the closest person to me in the world, except for my mom. 397 00:23:19,776 --> 00:23:21,653 We did everything together. 398 00:23:25,073 --> 00:23:27,826 To this day, she's my life. She's my blood. 399 00:23:27,909 --> 00:23:31,246 Actually we never did. So, we never went back to those. 400 00:23:31,788 --> 00:23:33,206 -Where are we going? -Just don't-- 401 00:23:33,290 --> 00:23:35,166 -Chicken Express, to get sweet tea. -Okay. 402 00:23:35,250 --> 00:23:37,085 If you like rolls, there's rolls. 403 00:23:37,168 --> 00:23:40,755 No, we're-- I just wanted sweet tea. 404 00:23:40,839 --> 00:23:43,717 -Wait, we're gonna do three. -Three large sweet teas-- 405 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:45,927 -Extra ice in one of them. -Please, sir? 406 00:23:46,011 --> 00:23:46,970 No problem. 407 00:23:47,053 --> 00:23:50,473 -You can't talk over me like that. -Well, you didn't say "please." 408 00:23:50,557 --> 00:23:52,058 I was getting there. 409 00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:59,399 Every time I've come home, 410 00:24:00,233 --> 00:24:04,237 I've always just gone to the places that I remember. 411 00:24:05,447 --> 00:24:08,408 It's because I don't want to lose that part of me. 412 00:24:09,993 --> 00:24:11,202 Do you even go here? 413 00:24:14,205 --> 00:24:15,248 Beep! 414 00:24:16,458 --> 00:24:17,584 Hi-- 415 00:24:17,667 --> 00:24:20,420 I need to see your driver's license if you're coming in the building, please. 416 00:24:20,503 --> 00:24:22,672 -A driver's license? -Yeah. 417 00:24:22,756 --> 00:24:24,674 -Okay. -Here. Grab one. 418 00:24:24,758 --> 00:24:26,635 For everybody that's out there. 419 00:24:27,761 --> 00:24:29,095 I don't have one. 420 00:24:29,179 --> 00:24:32,474 Okay, never mind. I used to go here when I was younger. 421 00:24:33,516 --> 00:24:36,895 My name is Selena, so I didn't mean to bother you, but thank you. 422 00:24:36,978 --> 00:24:38,271 -You're welcome. -Bye. 423 00:24:38,355 --> 00:24:39,356 Okay, bye. 424 00:24:42,317 --> 00:24:43,318 She does. 425 00:24:43,860 --> 00:24:44,694 Do you… 426 00:24:44,778 --> 00:24:46,571 Who all has a driver's license? 427 00:24:46,655 --> 00:24:47,781 -Everybody. -We have one. 428 00:24:47,864 --> 00:24:49,658 -She used to go here-- -I used to come here 429 00:24:49,741 --> 00:24:50,992 -and I wanted to see-- -No worries. 430 00:24:51,076 --> 00:24:52,702 Are you a teacher here? 431 00:24:52,786 --> 00:24:54,412 -I'm the registrar. -Got it. 432 00:24:54,496 --> 00:24:56,331 Except-- Yeah, I work in the office. 433 00:24:58,500 --> 00:24:59,501 Hi, guys. 434 00:25:01,086 --> 00:25:02,796 Everybody calm down. 435 00:25:02,879 --> 00:25:05,507 You're office aides? How old are you guys? 436 00:25:05,590 --> 00:25:06,716 Thirteen. 437 00:25:07,217 --> 00:25:09,427 That's so nice. Do you know I went to school here? 438 00:25:09,511 --> 00:25:11,012 -Yes. -You do? 439 00:25:11,096 --> 00:25:14,891 Okay. So I only had a crush on Dylan Alvarado. 440 00:25:16,393 --> 00:25:17,852 Sammy in elementary. 441 00:25:17,936 --> 00:25:20,230 Okay. Elementary was Sammy Rodriguez. 442 00:25:21,106 --> 00:25:27,112 -Then it was Dylan Alvarado, Keith Maupin… -Keith. 443 00:25:28,572 --> 00:25:30,156 Eli was in there somewhere. 444 00:25:31,783 --> 00:25:33,451 No, not necessarily. Really? 445 00:25:34,661 --> 00:25:36,371 -Yes. -Okay. 446 00:25:37,247 --> 00:25:39,165 And then Matthew from Danny Jones. 447 00:25:40,208 --> 00:25:41,209 That's it. 448 00:25:42,127 --> 00:25:44,004 Not one of them liked me back. 449 00:25:46,464 --> 00:25:49,718 -But again, like I said, they regret it. -Yeah, I was just saying. 450 00:25:51,720 --> 00:25:54,639 She was, I would say, like, an outcast, growing up, you know? 451 00:25:54,723 --> 00:25:57,767 Like, in school, she didn't really talk to many people. 452 00:25:57,851 --> 00:26:00,312 She had, like, her-- You know, little two or three friends, 453 00:26:00,395 --> 00:26:03,189 but not a lot of boyfriends, if you know what I mean. 454 00:26:03,857 --> 00:26:06,109 And so I would go in there to get my food, 455 00:26:06,192 --> 00:26:10,488 and I would sit, like, right here, at a long table. 456 00:26:11,907 --> 00:26:13,992 -But it was usually by myself. -No-- 457 00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:18,580 -Hi. My name is Selena. -I saw you earlier. 458 00:26:18,663 --> 00:26:20,373 Whatever you think you can't do, 459 00:26:20,457 --> 00:26:24,753 just know that there's no one that's gonna tell you no but yourself. 460 00:26:24,836 --> 00:26:27,047 You have to continue to do what you wanna do. 461 00:26:27,631 --> 00:26:29,549 -Now that is inspirational. -So-- I'm-- 462 00:26:29,633 --> 00:26:30,842 -Yeah? -Great. 463 00:26:30,926 --> 00:26:34,512 So, kick ass, or-- Oh, I'm sorry. 464 00:26:35,263 --> 00:26:37,390 You gotta stay after school. 465 00:26:37,474 --> 00:26:40,644 Hello, students at Danny Jones Middle School. 466 00:26:40,727 --> 00:26:42,979 This is Selena Gomez talking to you. 467 00:26:43,813 --> 00:26:46,149 Thank you for letting me disrupt your classes. 468 00:26:46,233 --> 00:26:49,819 And just a reminder, your teachers aren't that bad. 469 00:26:49,903 --> 00:26:52,906 You just gotta do the hard work. 470 00:26:52,989 --> 00:26:55,575 You have to hug him. He's gonna cry. 471 00:26:55,659 --> 00:26:57,911 -Can I have an autograph? -He's such a big fan. 472 00:26:57,994 --> 00:26:59,537 Oh, my God! 473 00:26:59,621 --> 00:27:00,622 You're welcome. 474 00:27:00,705 --> 00:27:02,791 -Can I have a hug, too? -Can I have a hug? 475 00:27:08,421 --> 00:27:10,840 -This is where… -I really don't know. 476 00:27:11,424 --> 00:27:12,425 …I grew up. 477 00:27:19,641 --> 00:27:21,268 That's my house. 478 00:27:21,351 --> 00:27:22,769 -It is? -Yeah. 479 00:27:24,563 --> 00:27:26,690 I bet your handprints are still there. 480 00:27:27,190 --> 00:27:28,733 This spot right here-- 481 00:27:28,817 --> 00:27:31,736 Poor neighbors, 'cause some guy would do drug deals, like, right there, 482 00:27:31,820 --> 00:27:34,948 and we would watch through those windows 'cause we weren't allowed outside. 483 00:27:35,031 --> 00:27:36,658 -I felt bad for those neighbors… -Yeah. 484 00:27:36,741 --> 00:27:38,535 …'cause he would pull up his car, it was an old car, 485 00:27:38,618 --> 00:27:39,995 there was a trunk, and… 486 00:27:40,996 --> 00:27:42,706 This was the same door. 487 00:27:43,957 --> 00:27:44,958 Hi. 488 00:27:49,588 --> 00:27:51,673 -Hi. -Hi, my name is Selena. 489 00:27:51,756 --> 00:27:53,008 -How are you? -How are you? 490 00:27:53,091 --> 00:27:54,885 -Good. Come on in. -Do you mind? 491 00:27:54,968 --> 00:27:56,011 -No. Please. -Okay. 492 00:27:56,511 --> 00:27:58,346 Oh, my gosh. 493 00:27:58,430 --> 00:28:00,390 Okay, this is where I used to 494 00:28:00,974 --> 00:28:05,437 -descale fish, right here. -Descale fish. 495 00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:06,813 Yes. 496 00:28:08,356 --> 00:28:10,108 Selena, what's he doing? 497 00:28:10,191 --> 00:28:12,235 He's just cutting his blood out. 498 00:28:13,153 --> 00:28:16,406 -So this is my bedroom. -It's kinda messy, though. 499 00:28:16,489 --> 00:28:21,036 Do you mind if I see if I still have my drawings from this closet? 500 00:28:22,495 --> 00:28:24,122 They took it out. 501 00:28:24,205 --> 00:28:26,082 -It's gone? -Yeah. 502 00:28:27,250 --> 00:28:30,795 I used to have, like-- I had a crush on Cole and Dylan Sprouse, 503 00:28:31,296 --> 00:28:33,673 so I'd come in my closet, and I would write things down. 504 00:28:33,757 --> 00:28:34,591 -No. -Thank you. 505 00:28:34,674 --> 00:28:36,968 -There's writing on this one. -Really? 506 00:28:37,052 --> 00:28:38,595 I guess you were really in love with Cole. 507 00:28:38,678 --> 00:28:41,723 Oh, my gosh! Stop this. 508 00:28:42,474 --> 00:28:45,101 I mean-- I'm sorry, Cole, if you ever see this. 509 00:28:45,602 --> 00:28:46,686 I would, like, straddle… 510 00:28:46,770 --> 00:28:48,188 -Christiana? -Yeah? 511 00:28:48,271 --> 00:28:50,565 This right here-- My nana can show you the photo. 512 00:28:50,649 --> 00:28:53,109 She's taking a photo. I'm looking at myself in the mirror. 513 00:28:53,193 --> 00:28:55,195 And that's when I found out I booked Barney. 514 00:28:55,278 --> 00:28:57,239 -Oh, my God. -You were on the phone. 515 00:28:57,322 --> 00:28:58,949 And there's a picture of me in here. 516 00:29:01,618 --> 00:29:03,536 Everything looks wonderful, Barney. 517 00:29:03,620 --> 00:29:04,996 She'll be coming round… 518 00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:07,707 I was seven years old when I got my first job. 519 00:29:08,875 --> 00:29:12,963 I was proud because I got to go escape my life and be in Barney Land, 520 00:29:13,046 --> 00:29:14,589 and just play and sing. 521 00:29:16,216 --> 00:29:19,594 I don't know, I just fell in love with these escape things. 522 00:29:21,429 --> 00:29:24,391 Then I never stopped. I just kept going. 523 00:29:25,141 --> 00:29:28,103 And then when I hit around 11 and I moved to Los Angeles, 524 00:29:28,186 --> 00:29:32,399 I just wanted to work. I loved my job. 525 00:29:33,316 --> 00:29:35,944 But eventually, after doing this for so long, 526 00:29:36,027 --> 00:29:39,072 I started to feel vain. 527 00:29:40,448 --> 00:29:43,076 It made me feel lonely somehow. 528 00:29:43,577 --> 00:29:46,454 And then when I started touring, it just got worse. 529 00:29:50,458 --> 00:29:52,669 After I got out of the last treatment center, 530 00:29:52,752 --> 00:29:54,921 I knew what made me happy was connection. 531 00:29:59,467 --> 00:30:00,719 This is Joyce. 532 00:30:02,262 --> 00:30:04,389 Priscilla, are we sure? 533 00:30:04,472 --> 00:30:06,433 Yeah. You want me to ask my grandma? 534 00:30:09,769 --> 00:30:13,565 She had this beautiful doll house that I wanted so bad. 535 00:30:14,065 --> 00:30:15,817 Is that why you put poop on her front porch? 536 00:30:15,901 --> 00:30:17,652 Stop. That was Charlie. 537 00:30:18,862 --> 00:30:20,405 They would always pick on her. 538 00:30:29,414 --> 00:30:30,415 Hi. 539 00:30:32,334 --> 00:30:34,794 -Hi, I'm Selena. -Yes? 540 00:30:34,878 --> 00:30:37,797 I used to come here when Joyce lived here. 541 00:30:37,881 --> 00:30:39,716 -Selena Gomez? -Yeah. 542 00:30:39,799 --> 00:30:40,800 Yeah. 543 00:30:41,468 --> 00:30:42,636 Yeah. 544 00:30:43,762 --> 00:30:44,804 Is she here? 545 00:30:44,888 --> 00:30:47,849 Yeah. She's-- Why don't you come on in? 546 00:30:47,933 --> 00:30:49,309 -Are you sure? -Yes. 547 00:30:49,392 --> 00:30:50,727 Okay. 548 00:30:50,810 --> 00:30:52,062 Do y'all still have that… 549 00:30:52,687 --> 00:30:54,981 -The doll house? -Don't let anyone else in. 550 00:30:56,900 --> 00:30:57,817 How are you? 551 00:30:57,901 --> 00:31:02,280 -Oh, my gosh. Hi. Don't move. -Thank you. 552 00:31:02,364 --> 00:31:04,324 -I got to move. -There's the doll house, Selena. 553 00:31:04,407 --> 00:31:07,994 Hi-- Is that the-- That's the dollhouse! Don't get up. 554 00:31:08,078 --> 00:31:09,496 I can't get up, baby. 555 00:31:09,996 --> 00:31:12,165 -It's okay. -How do you like my bald head? 556 00:31:12,249 --> 00:31:13,583 Yeah, well, you look great. 557 00:31:14,793 --> 00:31:17,796 Got past that, but, see, I broke my ankle twice this year. 558 00:31:17,879 --> 00:31:20,674 -I can't get up. -Yeah, what's been going on? 559 00:31:20,757 --> 00:31:22,300 Well, not much. 560 00:31:26,346 --> 00:31:27,389 I'm sorry. 561 00:31:28,014 --> 00:31:29,140 I broke a toe. 562 00:31:29,808 --> 00:31:31,768 So how's your health now? 563 00:31:31,851 --> 00:31:35,647 My health is goo-- Is doing good. My lupus is in remission. 564 00:31:35,730 --> 00:31:38,275 -Good. -And I'm very happy about that. 565 00:31:38,358 --> 00:31:40,652 I got a kidney transplant two years ago, 566 00:31:41,152 --> 00:31:43,572 and so far everything's going good with that. 567 00:31:43,655 --> 00:31:44,698 -Well, good. -Yeah, 568 00:31:44,781 --> 00:31:48,201 -I just take my medication every day. -You know, lupus is cousin to MS. 569 00:31:48,285 --> 00:31:50,537 Really? I did not know that. 570 00:31:50,620 --> 00:31:54,666 A lot of the symptoms are alike. It's an autoimmune disease. 571 00:31:55,584 --> 00:31:57,294 -Yeah? -What do you remember about me? 572 00:31:57,919 --> 00:32:01,798 I remember when we'd come over here, 573 00:32:01,882 --> 00:32:03,592 and me and Charlie would give you a hard time. 574 00:32:03,675 --> 00:32:07,137 Okay. Here's the self-testimony here. 575 00:32:07,220 --> 00:32:08,805 Yes, it is. And I apologize f-- 576 00:32:08,889 --> 00:32:10,390 You don't remember anything else about it? 577 00:32:10,473 --> 00:32:12,392 No, I do. You would let us come in, 578 00:32:12,475 --> 00:32:14,978 we'd have cookies, and I get to go right there, and-- 579 00:32:15,061 --> 00:32:17,105 That's what I was waiting for you to say my cookies. 580 00:32:17,188 --> 00:32:19,858 -I remember. We'd play with that. -Cookie lady. 581 00:32:19,941 --> 00:32:21,985 -I think it was over here last time. -It was. 582 00:32:22,068 --> 00:32:23,069 That's right. 583 00:32:29,409 --> 00:32:32,954 Oh, my gosh. I was obsessed with this, Joyce. 584 00:32:40,545 --> 00:32:43,256 -Well, it was good to see you. -I'm just so thrilled that you-- 585 00:32:43,340 --> 00:32:45,884 I once asked Debbie if you'd come and see me sometime. 586 00:32:46,885 --> 00:32:49,012 -And I'm glad I did. -You did. 587 00:32:49,971 --> 00:32:52,265 -I didn't have to ask. -Nope. 588 00:32:53,350 --> 00:32:54,351 You're sick too. 589 00:32:54,434 --> 00:32:56,728 Oh, it's okay. We all get through. 590 00:32:56,811 --> 00:32:59,022 -Thank you so much. -I hope you have a great day. 591 00:32:59,105 --> 00:33:00,982 -I'll be praying for you. -Okay, thank you. 592 00:33:01,066 --> 00:33:01,900 Bye, Joyce. 593 00:33:01,983 --> 00:33:04,486 -Bye, Selena. -Bye. Thank you so much. 594 00:33:04,569 --> 00:33:06,780 -Thank you. -It was good to see you. 595 00:33:06,863 --> 00:33:08,156 Thank you, guys. 596 00:33:10,325 --> 00:33:11,743 I will. 597 00:33:18,166 --> 00:33:21,294 When I got my lupus, it was really scary. 598 00:33:21,378 --> 00:33:22,963 Then I got out of it and I said, 599 00:33:23,046 --> 00:33:26,800 "I can go and visit these people, because I've had this." 600 00:33:26,883 --> 00:33:27,842 Hi, baby. 601 00:33:27,926 --> 00:33:31,012 And then I had the transplant, and we did a lot of work. 602 00:33:31,096 --> 00:33:33,473 And then when it started into mental health, 603 00:33:33,557 --> 00:33:38,019 and the same thing I said to myself is, "Now I can relate to these people." 604 00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:41,273 -I think things happen for a reason. -All right. Bye, guys. 605 00:33:46,361 --> 00:33:48,405 Just be who you are, Selena. 606 00:33:50,824 --> 00:33:52,033 Just stop trying. 607 00:33:53,618 --> 00:33:55,579 No one cares about what you're doing. 608 00:33:56,871 --> 00:34:02,043 It's about who I am. Being okay with where I am. 609 00:34:04,838 --> 00:34:07,257 I am grateful for my family. 610 00:34:07,340 --> 00:34:09,342 I am grateful for my friends. 611 00:34:10,093 --> 00:34:12,095 I am grateful to be alive. 612 00:34:21,271 --> 00:34:24,566 I'm just gonna add three more paragraphs that I wrote. 613 00:34:24,649 --> 00:34:26,818 "I think we are better when we tell the truth, 614 00:34:26,902 --> 00:34:29,278 -so again, and I'm telling my truth." -Yeah. 615 00:34:29,362 --> 00:34:31,364 "I was suffering mentally and emotionally, 616 00:34:31,448 --> 00:34:34,367 and I wasn't able to stay all buttoned up and together. 617 00:34:34,451 --> 00:34:38,704 I felt as though all of my pain, anxiety, fear washed over me all at once, 618 00:34:38,788 --> 00:34:41,291 and it was one of the scariest moments of my life. 619 00:34:41,374 --> 00:34:46,046 It was the day that-- that I found out I was bipolar." 620 00:34:46,128 --> 00:34:49,548 No one thinks that you need to say you're bipolar. 621 00:34:49,633 --> 00:34:51,009 You're 27 years old 622 00:34:51,092 --> 00:34:54,095 and you have a lifetime to tell the world that exact thing, 623 00:34:54,179 --> 00:34:57,974 unless you are determined that now's the time that you want it out. 624 00:34:58,058 --> 00:35:00,060 -Okay. -No one's against it. 625 00:35:00,143 --> 00:35:04,481 It's just that that becomes the narrative, right there. 626 00:35:04,564 --> 00:35:06,524 And I'm sure that means, like-- What? 627 00:35:06,608 --> 00:35:10,737 Like, certain people or directors or something may not wanna work with me? 628 00:35:10,820 --> 00:35:13,156 But then why would I wanna work with them anyway? 629 00:35:13,240 --> 00:35:16,159 -True. Whatever you think. -I think I'm gonna say it. 630 00:35:16,243 --> 00:35:18,828 -Yeah. -I'm gonna say it. It's fine. 631 00:35:19,537 --> 00:35:21,456 -And that's it. -It'll say-- Yeah. 632 00:35:22,332 --> 00:35:24,417 Selena Gomez talking candidly 633 00:35:24,501 --> 00:35:27,420 -about her struggle-- -…the star shining a light 634 00:35:27,504 --> 00:35:30,090 on her personal battle with depression and anxiety, 635 00:35:30,173 --> 00:35:31,758 and the journey that she says left her… 636 00:35:32,717 --> 00:35:33,552 Do I have 20 minutes? 637 00:35:33,635 --> 00:35:36,096 -Are you feeling nerves? -I don't feel good. 638 00:35:36,179 --> 00:35:37,430 Is it nerves? 639 00:35:38,598 --> 00:35:40,892 I don't feel good, you guys, like, at all. 640 00:35:41,518 --> 00:35:43,436 -Is she hungry? -Very uncomfortable. 641 00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:45,063 -What? -What happened? 642 00:35:45,855 --> 00:35:46,940 Or nerves. 643 00:35:48,108 --> 00:35:49,109 Makes sense. 644 00:35:54,948 --> 00:35:56,116 What did it do? 645 00:35:56,616 --> 00:35:58,368 -It makes you feel sick. -It burns. 646 00:35:58,451 --> 00:35:59,452 Yeah. 647 00:36:04,457 --> 00:36:05,625 Hi, Raquelle. 648 00:36:06,334 --> 00:36:07,502 Hello, Selena. 649 00:36:08,003 --> 00:36:11,464 Raquelle, this is so cute. This is a whole one-piece outfit, or two? 650 00:36:11,548 --> 00:36:13,091 No. It's so crazy… 651 00:36:14,593 --> 00:36:16,636 It is with great pleasure that I welcome you 652 00:36:16,720 --> 00:36:19,556 to the McLean Psychiatric Hospital annual dinner. 653 00:36:22,392 --> 00:36:25,312 Hi, guys. I'm very happy to be here, 654 00:36:25,395 --> 00:36:27,814 and I might be a little awkward, so I'm sorry. 655 00:36:29,566 --> 00:36:34,029 Yeah. I started when-- I started working when I was seven, 656 00:36:34,654 --> 00:36:37,240 and I quickly learned how to play the part. 657 00:36:38,033 --> 00:36:40,327 I have juggled work and school and relationships 658 00:36:40,410 --> 00:36:42,579 for as long as I can remember. 659 00:36:42,662 --> 00:36:46,875 As great as life was, underneath all of it, I was struggling. 660 00:36:47,542 --> 00:36:53,465 Last year, I was suffering mentally and emotionally, 661 00:36:53,548 --> 00:36:56,593 and I wasn't able to stay all buttoned-up and together. 662 00:36:57,260 --> 00:36:58,595 I sought support, 663 00:36:58,678 --> 00:37:02,265 and the doctors were able to give me a clear diagnosis. 664 00:37:03,141 --> 00:37:05,060 The moment that I received that information, 665 00:37:05,143 --> 00:37:10,815 I finally had the knowledge of why I had suffered for so many years 666 00:37:10,899 --> 00:37:12,525 with depression and anxiety. 667 00:37:13,109 --> 00:37:16,112 So I began to face it head-on, 668 00:37:16,196 --> 00:37:21,534 as my mother had taught me to face my fears and challenges when I was younger. 669 00:37:22,244 --> 00:37:24,913 I am happier, I am healthier, 670 00:37:24,996 --> 00:37:29,042 and I am in control of my emotions and thoughts more than I have ever been. 671 00:37:29,125 --> 00:37:32,629 So, I'm very happy about that. Thanks. 672 00:37:37,008 --> 00:37:41,346 It actually feels good to say it, because I mean it, you know? 673 00:37:41,429 --> 00:37:45,642 Like, for so many years, I feel, like, maybe I needed to say that, 674 00:37:45,725 --> 00:37:49,104 but it feels really great to be able to actually mean it this time. 675 00:37:50,063 --> 00:37:54,192 I also struggle with my own thoughts and feelings at times, 676 00:37:54,276 --> 00:37:56,653 but this doesn't make me faulty. 677 00:37:57,362 --> 00:37:59,114 This does not make me weak. 678 00:38:00,073 --> 00:38:01,783 This does not make me less than. 679 00:38:02,534 --> 00:38:03,868 This makes me human. 680 00:38:04,619 --> 00:38:07,289 That was my life and the fact that you brought light to it-- 681 00:38:07,372 --> 00:38:11,126 If it wasn't for someone that was able to put the word out there, 682 00:38:11,209 --> 00:38:12,460 it wouldn't make change happen. 683 00:38:12,544 --> 00:38:14,713 From the bottom of my heart, your courage is amazing, 684 00:38:14,796 --> 00:38:17,883 and I think that you are saving lives. I know that you're saving lives, 685 00:38:17,966 --> 00:38:20,886 -so thank you for the work that you do. -Wow, I just hope I'm a part of-- 686 00:38:21,636 --> 00:38:24,139 I just hope I'm a part of the conversation, you know? 687 00:38:24,222 --> 00:38:25,891 Absolutely, thank you. It's such an honor. 688 00:38:25,974 --> 00:38:31,104 You guys are the ones that save the lives, but as much as I can use what I do, 689 00:38:31,187 --> 00:38:33,940 -I'm more than happy to be here. -Thank you. 690 00:38:34,024 --> 00:38:39,195 Even just for you to, like, speak publicly about your experience with mental health, 691 00:38:39,279 --> 00:38:40,906 -depression, and anxiety-- -Yeah. 692 00:38:40,989 --> 00:38:46,494 Me, myself, I attempted almost three years ago in October, 693 00:38:46,578 --> 00:38:51,708 and I remember just-- Oh, thank you. 694 00:39:00,550 --> 00:39:02,969 Being honest that night helped. 695 00:39:04,304 --> 00:39:07,515 I texted Julia Michaels and Justin Tranter 696 00:39:07,599 --> 00:39:10,477 and said, "I think I'm ready to just say I'm sad." 697 00:39:11,394 --> 00:39:16,024 We wrote the song in 45 minutes. The fastest song I've ever written. 698 00:39:17,651 --> 00:39:23,865 It's about more than just a lost love. It's me learning to choose myself. 699 00:39:25,075 --> 00:39:26,243 To choose life. 700 00:39:29,913 --> 00:39:33,166 But also hoping that people can find grace and peace in that too. 701 00:39:35,919 --> 00:39:38,880 You promised the world And I fell for it 702 00:39:40,715 --> 00:39:42,926 I put you first and you adored it 703 00:39:43,009 --> 00:39:45,887 -Daddy. -Set fires to my forest 704 00:39:46,388 --> 00:39:50,392 And you let it burn Sang off-key in my chorus 705 00:39:50,934 --> 00:39:52,727 'Cause it wasn't yours 706 00:39:54,980 --> 00:39:56,815 I saw the signs and I ignored it 707 00:39:56,898 --> 00:39:58,608 The song is about knowing 708 00:39:58,692 --> 00:40:01,570 that you completely lost every part of who you are. 709 00:40:01,653 --> 00:40:04,864 Set fire to my purpose 710 00:40:04,948 --> 00:40:07,033 Just to rediscover yourself again. 711 00:40:07,117 --> 00:40:12,664 You got off on the hurtin' When it wasn't yours, yeah 712 00:40:13,832 --> 00:40:15,417 Are you still in love with Justin? 713 00:40:15,500 --> 00:40:16,751 Everything was so public. 714 00:40:16,835 --> 00:40:19,170 Selena, any comment on Bieber's engagement? 715 00:40:19,254 --> 00:40:21,047 What's your favorite thing about Bieber? 716 00:40:21,131 --> 00:40:23,967 Can I go to the-- Get food, please? Can you not-- Wanna go get food. 717 00:40:24,050 --> 00:40:28,138 I felt haunted by a past relationship that no one wanted to let go of. 718 00:40:29,514 --> 00:40:32,392 But then I just moved past it. 719 00:40:33,852 --> 00:40:35,270 And I wasn't afraid anymore. 720 00:40:36,563 --> 00:40:38,982 -Thank you, everybody. Bye, guys! -All right guys. So… 721 00:40:39,065 --> 00:40:40,775 -that is a camera wrap. -Thank you. 722 00:40:44,654 --> 00:40:47,157 It says, "Selena Gomez is now projected 723 00:40:47,240 --> 00:40:50,911 to debut inside the top 20 of Billboard Hot 100. 724 00:40:50,994 --> 00:40:54,039 This will make her and Adele the only females in history 725 00:40:54,122 --> 00:40:56,625 -to have the biggest ballad debut." -Yes. 726 00:40:56,708 --> 00:40:58,126 -Yeah. -I wanna cry. 727 00:41:09,346 --> 00:41:11,473 -Was it one of your biggest songs ever? -Yeah, it was. 728 00:41:11,556 --> 00:41:13,225 It is your biggest song ever, right? 729 00:41:14,851 --> 00:41:16,770 I wanted to be as honest as I could, 730 00:41:16,853 --> 00:41:20,315 and I think that I'm very lucky to be in a position 731 00:41:20,398 --> 00:41:21,942 where I can make people feel good. 732 00:41:22,609 --> 00:41:28,865 I feel like I had to go through the worst possible heartbreak ever, 733 00:41:28,949 --> 00:41:32,410 and then just forgetting everything at the drop of the hand. 734 00:41:32,494 --> 00:41:37,207 It was really confusing, but I just think that needed to happen. 735 00:41:37,290 --> 00:41:40,335 And ultimately it was the best thing that ever happened to me. 736 00:41:40,418 --> 00:41:42,003 And ultimately, so, your message is-- 737 00:41:42,087 --> 00:41:44,297 You didn't hear me say it was the best thing that happened to me. 738 00:41:44,381 --> 00:41:45,882 -Sorry. -You just started talking. 739 00:41:45,966 --> 00:41:47,926 -I can't say it anymore. -One more time. 740 00:41:48,009 --> 00:41:49,302 No. 741 00:41:49,386 --> 00:41:50,804 All right. What do you wanna ask me? 742 00:41:51,429 --> 00:41:55,016 I just-- Was it the best thing that ever happened to you? 743 00:41:59,479 --> 00:42:02,357 It was the best thing that ever happened to me, yes. 744 00:42:02,983 --> 00:42:05,777 So, when do you want an album out? 745 00:42:05,860 --> 00:42:07,320 -January. -Okay, cool. 746 00:42:07,404 --> 00:42:09,322 I just need to know if you have to leave, 747 00:42:09,406 --> 00:42:12,409 -or issues, or it-- -I have to go to Kenya and London. 748 00:42:12,492 --> 00:42:13,785 Okay. 749 00:42:14,703 --> 00:42:16,496 It's gonna be a fun six weeks. 750 00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:20,000 Do you want to perform at the AMAs this year? 751 00:42:20,083 --> 00:42:21,084 Yeah. 752 00:42:21,167 --> 00:42:23,003 And okay. 753 00:42:23,086 --> 00:42:24,671 -So if we do want to do that… -I do. 754 00:42:24,754 --> 00:42:26,798 -…we'll get into that right now. -Perfect. 755 00:42:26,882 --> 00:42:29,050 -Okay. -My stomach. 756 00:42:29,134 --> 00:42:31,469 -Are you hungry? -No. 757 00:42:32,053 --> 00:42:34,222 -You all right? -Yeah, I think it's nerves. 758 00:42:34,723 --> 00:42:36,474 It's also chilly. Do you want a sweater? 759 00:42:36,558 --> 00:42:37,851 -I'm hot as hell. -You are? Okay. 760 00:42:37,934 --> 00:42:39,436 -Well, then you're in the right room. -Yeah. 761 00:42:39,519 --> 00:42:41,146 -It feels like the Amazon. -It's like an igloo. 762 00:42:41,229 --> 00:42:42,355 It is an igloo in here. 763 00:42:42,439 --> 00:42:44,649 -Y'all are gonna kill me, but… -So, let's start over. 764 00:42:44,733 --> 00:42:46,401 -Y'all are gonna kill me, but I gotta go. -Okay. 765 00:42:46,484 --> 00:42:48,862 -I just feel-- Yeah. -You all right? Sorry. 766 00:42:50,363 --> 00:42:52,574 I think it's the stress of this meeting. 767 00:42:52,657 --> 00:42:53,658 I think so. 768 00:42:53,742 --> 00:42:55,118 -Me too. -Okay. 769 00:42:55,201 --> 00:42:56,286 Yeah. 770 00:43:03,293 --> 00:43:05,754 I hadn't been onstage in over two years, 771 00:43:06,421 --> 00:43:08,215 and I still didn't know if I was ready. 772 00:43:10,175 --> 00:43:13,220 But what good is having a song if I was too scared to sing it? 773 00:43:14,846 --> 00:43:17,515 After the AMAs, I was going straight to Kenya. 774 00:43:18,725 --> 00:43:22,479 For years, my doctors hadn't let me go because of my kidney transplant, 775 00:43:23,146 --> 00:43:24,314 but I was finally ready. 776 00:43:25,273 --> 00:43:28,652 So, Raquelle and I were going to visit students at a primary school, 777 00:43:28,735 --> 00:43:30,445 and a college for young women. 778 00:43:30,528 --> 00:43:34,491 Both schools that I helped raise the money to build in Kenya for the WE Charity. 779 00:43:35,158 --> 00:43:36,409 I knew it would be a lot, 780 00:43:36,493 --> 00:43:39,663 but it was my only chance to go before my album came out. 781 00:43:41,081 --> 00:43:42,582 -That's it. -Is it done? 782 00:43:42,666 --> 00:43:44,084 That's it, yeah. Well done. 783 00:43:44,167 --> 00:43:47,796 -Okay. -Take a deep breath in, and out. 784 00:43:50,549 --> 00:43:51,550 Hi, babe! 785 00:43:52,217 --> 00:43:54,052 -Did you do it? -Yeah. 786 00:43:54,886 --> 00:43:56,805 -Good job. -I'm just laying down. 787 00:43:56,888 --> 00:43:58,557 Are you in pain? 788 00:43:58,640 --> 00:44:00,517 Yeah, my arm feels weak. 789 00:44:01,601 --> 00:44:03,144 Oh, Mylanta. 790 00:44:04,229 --> 00:44:07,607 -Now you know what I went through. -I know. You went through more than me. 791 00:44:07,691 --> 00:44:09,317 I was gonna say, "Actually, no, you don't." 792 00:44:10,318 --> 00:44:12,279 -I'm proud of you, though. -Thank you. 793 00:44:14,906 --> 00:44:18,285 Selena Gomez's highly anticipated comeback on the AMA stage. 794 00:44:18,368 --> 00:44:19,953 This is her first performance 795 00:44:20,036 --> 00:44:21,830 in over two years, 796 00:44:21,913 --> 00:44:24,958 post all the Bieber drama and a short break from the biz. 797 00:44:26,418 --> 00:44:29,212 I saw the signs and I ignored it 798 00:44:31,047 --> 00:44:33,633 Rose-colored glasses all distorted 799 00:44:33,717 --> 00:44:35,176 Set fire to my-- 800 00:44:39,097 --> 00:44:41,808 The pitch is the nerves. 801 00:44:41,892 --> 00:44:45,061 So if you just let the muscle memory happen, 802 00:44:45,145 --> 00:44:48,732 you get out of your way, it's gonna just float up. 803 00:44:50,692 --> 00:44:52,444 I need you to trust yourself. 804 00:44:53,403 --> 00:44:55,655 Sel, we're gonna sing something else right now. 805 00:44:55,739 --> 00:44:57,282 -This one we need to sing. -Okay. 806 00:44:57,365 --> 00:44:58,450 Hit it. 807 00:44:59,951 --> 00:45:01,953 -Crank it! -This isn't my song. 808 00:45:06,833 --> 00:45:08,960 I don't even remember all of this one. 809 00:45:09,044 --> 00:45:10,962 Who cares? Just sing what you know. 810 00:45:11,671 --> 00:45:15,300 I keep fighting voices in my mind 811 00:45:15,383 --> 00:45:19,262 That say I'm not enough 812 00:45:19,846 --> 00:45:20,847 Come on! 813 00:45:24,768 --> 00:45:27,687 Every single lie that tells me 814 00:45:27,771 --> 00:45:33,735 I will never measure up 815 00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:50,377 Jesus help me. 816 00:45:54,214 --> 00:45:57,175 You promised the world And I fell for it 817 00:45:59,135 --> 00:46:01,680 I put you first and you adored it 818 00:46:01,763 --> 00:46:04,641 Set fire to my forest 819 00:46:04,724 --> 00:46:09,020 And I let it burn Sang off-key in my chorus 820 00:46:09,104 --> 00:46:10,689 'Cause it wasn't yours 821 00:46:11,273 --> 00:46:13,567 Selena Gomez suffered a panic attack before… 822 00:46:13,650 --> 00:46:15,318 Many accused her of being off-key… 823 00:46:15,402 --> 00:46:16,861 Gomez, who didn't learn how to sing 824 00:46:16,945 --> 00:46:18,738 after her 10-year-old career, and gets millions for it. 825 00:46:18,822 --> 00:46:21,116 …in four years. But anxiety, it doesn't just disappear. 826 00:46:21,199 --> 00:46:24,536 In fact, she says that her lupus amplifies her anxiety. 827 00:46:25,829 --> 00:46:28,331 Hi. She's up. 828 00:46:28,415 --> 00:46:30,166 -Hi. -Hi. 829 00:46:32,377 --> 00:46:33,503 How's it going? 830 00:46:34,254 --> 00:46:35,714 Hey, Sir Winnie. 831 00:46:38,675 --> 00:46:41,887 I got you some soup and that… thing, 832 00:46:41,970 --> 00:46:43,054 and a ham and cheese. 833 00:46:43,138 --> 00:46:48,351 Aleen asked me, when you do London promo, after Kenya, 834 00:46:48,435 --> 00:46:49,936 you're there for, like, three days. 835 00:46:50,020 --> 00:46:55,483 And she asked if you can do-- If you wanna do Paris for a day and then home. 836 00:46:55,567 --> 00:46:57,819 -Are you coming with me, Raquelle? -Yeah. 837 00:46:58,528 --> 00:46:59,529 Okay. 838 00:46:59,613 --> 00:47:02,198 Yeah? You don't think that's too much? 839 00:47:03,033 --> 00:47:05,410 No, but I also don't wanna rush it. 840 00:47:06,119 --> 00:47:07,829 I haven't done promo in years. 841 00:47:09,706 --> 00:47:11,958 It's my least favorite thing in the world to do. 842 00:47:12,500 --> 00:47:14,669 But I feel like it's gonna be great, 843 00:47:14,753 --> 00:47:17,839 because you're excited about what you're putting out 844 00:47:17,923 --> 00:47:19,758 and it's so true to you. 845 00:47:20,717 --> 00:47:22,802 I don't wanna talk about work anymore. 846 00:47:22,886 --> 00:47:24,638 -Okay. -Let's put on a movie. 847 00:47:28,141 --> 00:47:29,309 I need a break. 848 00:47:30,310 --> 00:47:31,311 From everything? 849 00:47:32,646 --> 00:47:34,231 No. I have a lot of work to do. 850 00:47:36,024 --> 00:47:39,819 Hunter, do you wanna maybe walk and go in first in-- 851 00:47:40,779 --> 00:47:44,699 I know you don't pay attention to your calendar, but you're going to Africa. 852 00:47:44,783 --> 00:47:46,952 Yeah, 'cause I'm going to Kenya first, 853 00:47:47,035 --> 00:47:49,913 and then I'm gonna go straight to London, and Paris for promo. 854 00:47:49,996 --> 00:47:53,375 Okay. You feel okay about trying to get everything done 855 00:47:53,458 --> 00:47:54,834 -for the next month? -Yeah. 856 00:47:55,544 --> 00:47:56,545 Not worried. 857 00:47:56,628 --> 00:47:59,422 Then it's just the video, the campaign, the song. 858 00:48:05,178 --> 00:48:07,764 -No computers in your-- -No. Do we take our shoes off? 859 00:48:07,847 --> 00:48:09,307 -Yes. -Yeah. 860 00:48:11,560 --> 00:48:13,103 Let's go. 861 00:48:25,532 --> 00:48:26,408 Thank you. 862 00:48:26,491 --> 00:48:27,409 Welcome. 863 00:48:47,387 --> 00:48:49,431 -We also say it's a blessing. -What? 864 00:48:49,514 --> 00:48:51,516 When it rains, we say it's a blessing. 865 00:48:51,600 --> 00:48:52,809 -It's a blessing? -Yeah. 866 00:48:52,893 --> 00:48:55,186 When it rains here, it's considered a blessing. 867 00:48:55,270 --> 00:48:56,479 Oh, I love that. 868 00:49:00,400 --> 00:49:03,904 Take this. We can put this on now. Are you okay with the camera? 869 00:49:03,987 --> 00:49:05,739 -It's okay. -It's fine-- It's okay? 870 00:49:09,284 --> 00:49:11,244 -Hello, everyone. -Hello. 871 00:49:11,328 --> 00:49:12,829 -Hi, what's your name? -Aneesia. 872 00:49:12,913 --> 00:49:15,165 -Aneesia? I'm Selena, nice to meet you. -Yeah. 873 00:49:16,124 --> 00:49:21,087 Hello. My name is Selena. I have come here with WE, 874 00:49:21,171 --> 00:49:26,885 and I want to honor your drive for education. 875 00:49:26,968 --> 00:49:29,721 So, I'm very happy to be here. 876 00:49:31,264 --> 00:49:35,352 So, which grade did you reach, actually? Did you finish grade 12? 877 00:49:35,435 --> 00:49:38,188 I finished eighth grade, 878 00:49:38,271 --> 00:49:43,109 and then for nine, ten, 11, 12, I had to do school on set. 879 00:49:43,652 --> 00:49:46,446 To-- Like, five hours and then I could work, so… 880 00:49:46,529 --> 00:49:47,614 Wow. 881 00:49:47,697 --> 00:49:49,658 Well, it was-- it was interesting, you know? 882 00:49:49,741 --> 00:49:53,453 To be homeschooled by a computer. It's not real… 883 00:49:53,536 --> 00:49:54,371 Wow. 884 00:49:54,454 --> 00:49:57,624 …but it was great for me. It worked, you know? 885 00:49:59,626 --> 00:50:02,295 Late last year, we had a talent group, 886 00:50:02,379 --> 00:50:04,589 and we were singing, like, your song. Like… 887 00:50:04,673 --> 00:50:06,716 Who says you're not perfect 888 00:50:06,800 --> 00:50:08,552 That's my song! 889 00:50:08,635 --> 00:50:11,221 -That's one of my favorite songs. -Who says, who says 890 00:50:11,304 --> 00:50:16,101 Who says you're not perfect? Who says you're not worth it? 891 00:50:16,184 --> 00:50:19,896 Who says you're the only one That's hurtin'? 892 00:50:19,980 --> 00:50:21,648 I was really shy in school, 893 00:50:22,190 --> 00:50:25,944 so I would usually just hang out with two friends. 894 00:50:26,444 --> 00:50:31,866 And my cousin was, like, the captain of the cheerleading team, 895 00:50:31,950 --> 00:50:34,578 and so nobody would pick on me because of my cousin. 896 00:50:34,661 --> 00:50:37,747 My cousin, like, controls everything. 897 00:50:37,831 --> 00:50:38,665 Okay. 898 00:50:38,748 --> 00:50:43,420 For me, I grew up in a family of eight, like my mom and dad have eight kids. 899 00:50:43,962 --> 00:50:46,590 My mom told me that they want me to be married off, 900 00:50:46,673 --> 00:50:48,675 but, at some point, they said that, 901 00:50:48,758 --> 00:50:52,596 "Since you got a school where you got a scholarship to go and learn, 902 00:50:52,679 --> 00:50:54,306 there's no need for us." 903 00:50:54,389 --> 00:50:55,724 For them, they don't pay any fee. 904 00:50:55,807 --> 00:50:57,809 So they told me I'm not going to be married off. 905 00:50:58,768 --> 00:51:01,062 -That's very interesting. -Do you believe in love? 906 00:51:02,355 --> 00:51:04,149 In love? 907 00:51:04,232 --> 00:51:05,817 Do you believe in love? 908 00:51:07,861 --> 00:51:10,155 -'Cause I know you love each other. -Yeah. 909 00:51:11,364 --> 00:51:12,616 Love is just a gift. 910 00:51:12,699 --> 00:51:14,367 -Yeah. -Yeah. 911 00:51:16,202 --> 00:51:19,289 Is it something that you look forward to, or you just think-- 912 00:51:19,372 --> 00:51:21,207 -You focus on what you do… -For me-- 913 00:51:21,291 --> 00:51:23,460 -…and then it comes. Right? -Yeah. 914 00:51:23,543 --> 00:51:25,837 Or, like, having a boyfriend or such. 915 00:51:25,921 --> 00:51:30,091 So, for me, I will get one when I'm done with my high school. 916 00:51:30,175 --> 00:51:31,301 Love it. 917 00:51:31,384 --> 00:51:33,929 Because I don't want to split my mind. 918 00:51:34,012 --> 00:51:35,889 So, I want to concentrate first here. 919 00:51:37,265 --> 00:51:39,142 Just when the house is being built, 920 00:51:39,226 --> 00:51:41,144 you cannot start building by the roof. 921 00:51:41,228 --> 00:51:43,021 You start by the foundation. 922 00:51:43,104 --> 00:51:44,731 So, I don't have the foundation, 923 00:51:44,814 --> 00:51:47,150 so till I'm done with form four… 924 00:51:47,234 --> 00:51:49,486 then after that, I can now think about that. 925 00:51:50,695 --> 00:51:51,696 I love that. 926 00:51:51,780 --> 00:51:53,323 That's really well said. 927 00:52:02,999 --> 00:52:06,002 -My name? Selena. -Selena? 928 00:52:06,086 --> 00:52:07,295 -Yeah. -Selena. 929 00:52:07,379 --> 00:52:09,673 -What's your name? -Diana. 930 00:52:09,756 --> 00:52:11,258 Diana? 931 00:52:11,341 --> 00:52:12,884 Beautiful. 932 00:52:14,386 --> 00:52:15,387 Raquelle. 933 00:52:16,012 --> 00:52:22,644 -Oh yes. She says, "I have a son." -Right! Your son-- He's old. Okay. 934 00:52:24,229 --> 00:52:25,605 Do you think he'd like me? 935 00:52:26,690 --> 00:52:27,732 How old's he? 936 00:52:28,358 --> 00:52:31,695 -He's like, 20, 21 years old. -Okay! 937 00:52:31,778 --> 00:52:33,572 -That works. -That might be better, 938 00:52:33,655 --> 00:52:40,328 maybe more for Selena. We're both 27. Selena likes younger guys. Yeah. 939 00:52:40,412 --> 00:52:44,291 Oh, my gosh. What? Raquelle! 940 00:52:45,542 --> 00:52:47,419 I have, in the past. 941 00:52:52,048 --> 00:52:54,634 I'm a little worried my lupus is flaring up. 942 00:52:55,802 --> 00:52:57,804 Here, will you open this, please? 943 00:52:58,889 --> 00:53:01,182 My hands are still so messed up. 944 00:53:01,266 --> 00:53:02,350 Shaky? 945 00:53:02,434 --> 00:53:04,311 No, they're-- They hurt. 946 00:53:04,394 --> 00:53:06,730 -So, every time I do this, they hurt. -Why? 947 00:53:07,314 --> 00:53:11,109 I don't know. I went to the doctor and he said he didn't see any swollen. 948 00:53:11,192 --> 00:53:16,573 Said the only way that, you know, we could find out is if I did, like, a-- 949 00:53:16,656 --> 00:53:17,782 Thank you. 950 00:53:18,742 --> 00:53:22,203 -I had to do a CAT scan or whatever? MRI. -Oh, yeah. 951 00:53:22,287 --> 00:53:24,080 I think I might when I get back. 952 00:53:29,502 --> 00:53:33,006 My name is Betty Chep, and I'm a student here taking nursing. 953 00:53:33,089 --> 00:53:35,467 When you're checking your blood pressure, which average… 954 00:53:35,550 --> 00:53:37,177 Being a nurse, you're there with people 955 00:53:37,260 --> 00:53:38,970 when they feel so bad, and support them. 956 00:53:39,054 --> 00:53:41,348 So I felt that's the best thing that I can do in life. 957 00:53:42,224 --> 00:53:44,267 My dad was my role model. 958 00:53:44,351 --> 00:53:46,186 And he really taught me that… 959 00:53:46,269 --> 00:53:48,855 In this life, you have to show people empathy, 960 00:53:48,939 --> 00:53:51,858 have a chance to give people more than what you receive. 961 00:53:51,942 --> 00:53:52,859 Yeah. 962 00:53:52,943 --> 00:53:54,694 I believe in God. 963 00:53:54,778 --> 00:53:57,948 I always tell myself that no matter what people think about me, 964 00:53:58,031 --> 00:54:00,033 and what God has planned for me in my life, 965 00:54:00,116 --> 00:54:02,035 that is what I will achieve in life. Yeah. 966 00:54:02,118 --> 00:54:03,370 -That's amazing. -Yeah. 967 00:54:04,371 --> 00:54:06,456 -I believe in God as well. -Wow. 968 00:54:08,667 --> 00:54:11,795 I was born in a middle-class family. 969 00:54:11,878 --> 00:54:14,297 But unfortunately, when I was in grade ten, 970 00:54:14,381 --> 00:54:17,634 my dad passed in a road accident. 971 00:54:17,717 --> 00:54:21,763 My mom was not able to raise school fees for me to go to the campus. 972 00:54:21,846 --> 00:54:24,099 So I had to stay home six years. 973 00:54:24,182 --> 00:54:28,478 Just fetching firewood, collecting water, and doing some home chores. 974 00:54:28,562 --> 00:54:30,855 So in those six years, I felt so terrible, 975 00:54:30,939 --> 00:54:35,569 because I felt that I was becoming a burden to my mom and everybody. 976 00:54:35,652 --> 00:54:38,363 So I felt so discouraged and so hopeless. 977 00:54:38,446 --> 00:54:41,157 So I went to the river, and then I felt that… 978 00:54:41,241 --> 00:54:43,368 "Let me just drown myself into this river. 979 00:54:43,451 --> 00:54:45,495 End it here, so that… 980 00:54:45,579 --> 00:54:47,622 I will never see my mother suffer, 981 00:54:47,706 --> 00:54:50,041 I will never see my sisters and my siblings… 982 00:54:50,125 --> 00:54:51,585 Just let me end this." 983 00:54:52,836 --> 00:54:54,963 And I sat there for some time, and I thought… 984 00:54:55,046 --> 00:54:58,967 "If I end my life now, and I'm the firstborn in my family… 985 00:54:59,050 --> 00:55:01,052 what example will I have shown to my family?" 986 00:55:01,136 --> 00:55:03,096 -Wow. -So I woke up, 987 00:55:03,179 --> 00:55:05,015 took the water, and went home. 988 00:55:05,098 --> 00:55:06,558 After two weeks… 989 00:55:06,641 --> 00:55:09,519 I was called for an interview here at the WE College. 990 00:55:09,603 --> 00:55:10,812 -Wow. -Just a miracle. 991 00:55:10,896 --> 00:55:13,690 But look at me now. I'm a role model in my community. 992 00:55:13,773 --> 00:55:14,608 You are. 993 00:55:14,691 --> 00:55:17,611 Some people call me and tell me to talk-- to speak to the girls… 994 00:55:17,694 --> 00:55:21,865 and I usually tell them, even if it means doing what you do daily… 995 00:55:21,948 --> 00:55:24,826 Continue doing it, and a miracle will come ahead of you. 996 00:55:24,910 --> 00:55:26,161 -Yeah. -Yeah. 997 00:55:26,745 --> 00:55:32,042 That takes so much courage, to think about wanting to end your life. 998 00:55:33,585 --> 00:55:38,006 And understanding that that's not what you are meant to do. 999 00:55:38,089 --> 00:55:40,175 -Yes. -All by yourself. 1000 00:55:40,258 --> 00:55:43,220 And I really relate to that. So when you say that, 1001 00:55:43,303 --> 00:55:47,432 I know that feeling where you're about to do something 1002 00:55:47,515 --> 00:55:48,850 -to hurt yourself. -Yeah. 1003 00:55:50,894 --> 00:55:53,271 And I'm so happy to know you. 1004 00:55:53,355 --> 00:55:55,815 It's an honor for me to know you too. 1005 00:56:09,246 --> 00:56:10,956 Raquelle! Come on. 1006 00:56:22,175 --> 00:56:24,844 One of my, like, goals in life-- 1007 00:56:24,928 --> 00:56:28,598 I've, like, had this in my mind for seven years, 1008 00:56:29,349 --> 00:56:32,310 -is to create a bill… -Yeah. Oh, wow. 1009 00:56:32,394 --> 00:56:37,899 …where it is required to have a therapy, sort of, class 1010 00:56:37,983 --> 00:56:40,986 in elementary school on to high school. 1011 00:56:41,486 --> 00:56:44,656 I just think, you know, when you're a kid and you're in kindergarten, 1012 00:56:44,739 --> 00:56:46,908 they ask you, like, how you're feeling. 1013 00:56:46,992 --> 00:56:50,912 There's, like, a smiley face or sad face, and they're learning emotions, 1014 00:56:50,996 --> 00:56:56,626 and that's amazing, but then why would we not continue to talk about that? 1015 00:56:56,710 --> 00:56:59,546 -Feelings only get more complicated… -Yes. 1016 00:56:59,629 --> 00:57:02,883 …and it gets harder to navigate. 1017 00:57:02,966 --> 00:57:05,343 -Can I ask a very odd question? -Yeah. 1018 00:57:05,427 --> 00:57:08,430 -What's holding you back from doing it? -It's ready to go. 1019 00:57:09,973 --> 00:57:12,517 That I'm not able to. That I'm not capable. 1020 00:57:14,978 --> 00:57:17,022 You know, I'm not good enough. 1021 00:57:19,149 --> 00:57:24,404 I don't know. That's something that I've felt a lot of growing up. 1022 00:57:26,615 --> 00:57:27,616 Yeah. 1023 00:57:27,699 --> 00:57:32,871 But it's the very thing that makes you feel that, 1024 00:57:33,496 --> 00:57:35,332 is why you can relate to others. 1025 00:57:35,415 --> 00:57:38,293 So it's the exact reason why you are the perfect person. 1026 00:57:43,215 --> 00:57:46,301 The truth is, I've never felt good enough. 1027 00:57:47,302 --> 00:57:49,888 Even when I'm on stage and in front of a crowd, 1028 00:57:49,971 --> 00:57:53,975 I'll always find the one person who doesn't like me, and I believe them. 1029 00:57:55,018 --> 00:57:56,645 I wanna believe in myself. 1030 00:57:57,979 --> 00:58:00,482 The people I've met here in Kenya are so giving. 1031 00:58:01,191 --> 00:58:03,735 I just want to feel like I deserve to be here with them. 1032 00:58:06,071 --> 00:58:07,447 We can talk more later. 1033 00:58:07,530 --> 00:58:08,698 -About what? -About all this. 1034 00:58:09,199 --> 00:58:11,701 -About what? I know. -I know you're feeling sad. 1035 00:58:11,785 --> 00:58:13,495 We should do a trip quarterly. 1036 00:58:13,578 --> 00:58:15,705 Like, we should plan this, like, every quarter. 1037 00:58:16,331 --> 00:58:21,127 We also need to talk about, like, why you hate going home so much, 1038 00:58:21,211 --> 00:58:23,004 why you don't wanna turn on your phone. Like, that's-- 1039 00:58:23,088 --> 00:58:24,422 You shouldn't feel that way. 1040 00:58:24,506 --> 00:58:27,551 Do you know what I mean? So it's like, what can you implement in your life 1041 00:58:27,634 --> 00:58:30,387 that makes you not anxious to turn on your phone, 1042 00:58:30,470 --> 00:58:34,182 that makes you not sad to go home, that makes you not hate your job. 1043 00:58:34,266 --> 00:58:35,267 Do you know what I'm saying? 1044 00:58:35,350 --> 00:58:38,395 It's like, what-- 'Cause you can implement things in your life 1045 00:58:38,478 --> 00:58:39,563 that help you get through that. 1046 00:58:39,646 --> 00:58:43,024 You don't have to live your life constantly in that state. 1047 00:58:43,108 --> 00:58:46,528 In a way, that's just escaping reality. Do you know what I mean? It's like-- 1048 00:58:46,611 --> 00:58:48,154 Or is this reality? 1049 00:58:48,238 --> 00:58:51,116 This isn't reality. This is their reality. This is-- 1050 00:58:51,199 --> 00:58:53,493 This can be reality a few times a year. 1051 00:58:53,577 --> 00:58:56,246 You can come and volunteer and come for a week, 1052 00:58:56,329 --> 00:58:58,582 but this is-- this isn't reality. 1053 00:59:00,750 --> 00:59:04,880 I just wanna stay here forever 1054 00:59:04,963 --> 00:59:07,591 I don't wanna close my eyes 1055 00:59:09,009 --> 00:59:13,054 I just wanna stay here forever 1056 00:59:13,138 --> 00:59:15,932 I don't wanna close my eyes 1057 00:59:17,267 --> 00:59:20,729 I just wanna stay here forever 1058 00:59:21,479 --> 00:59:24,190 I don't wanna close my eyes 1059 00:59:25,525 --> 00:59:29,487 I just wanna stay here forever 1060 00:59:29,571 --> 00:59:33,325 I don't wanna close my eyes 1061 00:59:54,429 --> 00:59:56,723 -Who is that? -The paparazzi's blocking. 1062 00:59:56,806 --> 00:59:58,683 Oh, my God. That's a paparazzi carpool. 1063 00:59:58,767 --> 01:00:00,101 Yeah, they're teaming up. 1064 01:00:03,563 --> 01:00:05,649 It's very loud here, Chris. 1065 01:00:05,732 --> 01:00:06,983 I know. 1066 01:00:08,610 --> 01:00:11,947 I do feel, like, a bit of a culture shock. 1067 01:00:12,030 --> 01:00:13,031 I know. 1068 01:00:14,699 --> 01:00:17,452 Selena? Good morning. 1069 01:00:18,036 --> 01:00:19,037 Hey. 1070 01:00:19,871 --> 01:00:23,500 It's 7:00. Glam's gonna start in a half hour. 1071 01:00:24,167 --> 01:00:25,544 Selly? 1072 01:00:26,336 --> 01:00:28,505 Oh no, I just had a bad dream. 1073 01:00:28,588 --> 01:00:31,925 Do you know, I didn't have one bad dream in Kenya? 1074 01:00:32,008 --> 01:00:34,052 -I know, and then-- -She didn't have bad dreams in Kenya. 1075 01:00:34,135 --> 01:00:35,136 What was I saying? 1076 01:00:35,220 --> 01:00:38,139 I only heard a few things 'cause you were, like, mumbling, 1077 01:00:38,223 --> 01:00:41,726 but, like, the one thing was, like, "I got coffee for everyone!" 1078 01:00:41,810 --> 01:00:44,354 -And I was like, "Oh, wow!" -She said that? 1079 01:00:44,437 --> 01:00:45,730 And then she was like… 1080 01:00:46,815 --> 01:00:48,108 Doing stuff like today, 1081 01:00:48,191 --> 01:00:52,195 it allows you the platform to really be able to do trips like that 1082 01:00:52,279 --> 01:00:54,030 and make a difference, you know? 1083 01:00:54,114 --> 01:00:57,951 So even though this kind of stuff's hard, it, you know… 1084 01:00:58,451 --> 01:01:01,329 Can you order some Thai? That Thai dish? 1085 01:01:01,413 --> 01:01:03,206 You want Thai right now? 7:00 a.m.? 1086 01:01:03,290 --> 01:01:04,749 -Yep. -Let's make it happen. 1087 01:01:09,504 --> 01:01:14,384 In the studio, it is the one, the only, the absolute queen that is Selena Gomez! 1088 01:01:15,927 --> 01:01:17,387 -So, your album's coming out. -Yeah. 1089 01:01:17,470 --> 01:01:18,555 You had a break from music. 1090 01:01:18,638 --> 01:01:21,349 What did you get up to on your time off, on your break away? 1091 01:01:21,433 --> 01:01:25,478 Some stuff happened in between that was a bit personal and hard, 1092 01:01:25,562 --> 01:01:31,401 and then towards the end, it was necessary. 1093 01:01:31,484 --> 01:01:33,737 Hello, everyone. I am Selena Gomez, 1094 01:01:33,820 --> 01:01:38,033 and I am answering questions from the Internet. 1095 01:01:38,116 --> 01:01:41,161 "Selena Gomez eats Oreos with a fork." 1096 01:01:41,244 --> 01:01:44,456 These are just great. I'm doing great things for the world. 1097 01:01:44,539 --> 01:01:46,041 Which interview number is this of the day? 1098 01:01:46,124 --> 01:01:47,125 Four. 1099 01:01:47,208 --> 01:01:48,793 -Four? -Four already? 1100 01:01:48,877 --> 01:01:50,921 Selena, your single 1101 01:01:51,004 --> 01:01:52,714 makes me really emotional, and I want to give you a hug 1102 01:01:52,797 --> 01:01:55,217 and wrap you in a blanket and just talk about boys forever. 1103 01:01:55,300 --> 01:01:57,886 I think the point of the song is so that I really 1104 01:01:57,969 --> 01:02:00,263 don't need to sit around and talk about boys. 1105 01:02:01,389 --> 01:02:03,099 Selena, for your fans! 1106 01:02:03,183 --> 01:02:06,186 Hey, it's Selena Gomez, and I'm playing the Emoji Game. 1107 01:02:06,269 --> 01:02:08,813 But have you got a guilty-pleasure weird food combination? 1108 01:02:08,897 --> 01:02:10,273 Popcorn and pickle juice. 1109 01:02:10,357 --> 01:02:11,983 What is your favorite color? 1110 01:02:12,067 --> 01:02:13,985 My favorite color is red. 1111 01:02:15,403 --> 01:02:17,697 -Wizards of Waverly Place. -Stop. 1112 01:02:19,199 --> 01:02:21,534 So it's one DJ equals one word. 1113 01:02:22,285 --> 01:02:23,995 "Marshmello." 1114 01:02:24,996 --> 01:02:27,249 -Fluffy. -Okay. And that's it. Thank you. 1115 01:02:27,332 --> 01:02:28,959 -Thank you. -Thanks. 1116 01:02:29,042 --> 01:02:30,335 Oh. Okay, sorry. 1117 01:02:34,756 --> 01:02:37,050 Those were some weird-ass questions. 1118 01:02:38,426 --> 01:02:40,804 It just seems like such a waste of time. 1119 01:02:43,890 --> 01:02:45,433 What am I doing right now? 1120 01:02:46,810 --> 01:02:51,064 Right now, we're getting up, and then glam is coming in ten minutes. 1121 01:02:52,065 --> 01:02:54,401 Sorry, I was asleep. What do I have to do? 1122 01:02:57,487 --> 01:02:59,489 The feelings that you feel when you're jet-lagged-- 1123 01:02:59,573 --> 01:03:01,074 You never feel them any other time. 1124 01:03:01,157 --> 01:03:04,411 -What is that? -Like, combination of all things. 1125 01:03:04,494 --> 01:03:06,371 -It's not even tired. -I know. 1126 01:03:06,454 --> 01:03:09,416 You feel like you are just in another world. 1127 01:03:09,499 --> 01:03:11,293 -Like, in space. -Yeah. 1128 01:03:17,299 --> 01:03:18,508 Okay, put in. 1129 01:03:26,725 --> 01:03:27,809 There's my ride. 1130 01:03:33,899 --> 01:03:37,736 You know we have Marissa's birthday dinner the night we get back? 1131 01:03:38,737 --> 01:03:41,531 The night we get back? No. I'd rather do what I'm doing. 1132 01:03:41,615 --> 01:03:44,951 I'm not going to that. I have to do-- shoot a music video the next day. 1133 01:03:46,578 --> 01:03:47,579 Nice. 1134 01:03:48,204 --> 01:03:50,624 -I mean, it's a lot. -It'll be good. 1135 01:03:50,707 --> 01:03:53,668 No, it is good, but you're gonna be kind of messed up for a few days. 1136 01:03:53,752 --> 01:03:56,004 Yeah, totally. Just thought you would wanna come, 1137 01:03:56,087 --> 01:03:57,631 -but that's just-- -I would, 1138 01:03:57,714 --> 01:04:00,008 -but I'm not gonna have one day to adjust. -Okay. 1139 01:04:00,091 --> 01:04:03,220 Do you think that I'm complaining about my job? 1140 01:04:03,303 --> 01:04:07,474 Yeah. You felt-- You sounded like you were. 1141 01:04:07,557 --> 01:04:10,894 Not at all. Raquelle, I was saying I need to get rest. 1142 01:04:10,977 --> 01:04:14,064 -Not like it's a bad thing. Of course I-- -No, it's not a bad thing. 1143 01:04:14,147 --> 01:04:15,941 It was the way you said it. Not what you said. 1144 01:04:16,024 --> 01:04:18,193 So I was not complaining about work. 1145 01:04:18,276 --> 01:04:22,322 I was literally just complaining that it'd be nice if I get more sleep. 1146 01:04:26,743 --> 01:04:29,704 -You think I'm ungrateful for it-- -No, I don't think you're ungrateful. 1147 01:04:29,788 --> 01:04:33,458 I just feel like you've been so ups-- like, down, over the past couple days, 1148 01:04:33,541 --> 01:04:36,253 so I just-- I'm trying to figure out what's going on. 1149 01:04:36,336 --> 01:04:38,296 But we had the most amazing week in Africa-- 1150 01:04:38,380 --> 01:04:39,756 I know. 1151 01:04:40,340 --> 01:04:41,383 I'm just waking up. 1152 01:04:41,466 --> 01:04:44,594 You've heard me tell everybody how much I love London. 1153 01:04:44,678 --> 01:04:46,429 What else do you want from me? 1154 01:04:46,972 --> 01:04:47,973 Nothing. 1155 01:04:53,895 --> 01:04:57,190 I just was asking, "Are you good?" 'Cause you don't seem happy. 1156 01:04:57,274 --> 01:04:58,650 I'm having fun. 1157 01:04:58,733 --> 01:05:00,360 Good. I'm so happy you're having fun. 1158 01:05:00,443 --> 01:05:03,405 Like, it doesn't seem like it to me, so I was just asking you. 1159 01:05:03,488 --> 01:05:05,699 I'm so fucking done. 1160 01:05:22,757 --> 01:05:23,758 Hey. 1161 01:05:25,051 --> 01:05:27,804 About your new album, what would you like your fans 1162 01:05:27,888 --> 01:05:30,348 to keep in mind with this new project? 1163 01:05:31,683 --> 01:05:35,061 So I felt like it was the right time to tell my story 1164 01:05:35,145 --> 01:05:38,315 before it's past a point that it didn't matter. 1165 01:05:38,398 --> 01:05:41,818 I felt like the message I needed to release in "Lose You to Love Me" 1166 01:05:41,902 --> 01:05:44,279 was meant to be a song for others. 1167 01:05:44,362 --> 01:05:47,115 It's meant to tell people that they're not alone 1168 01:05:47,198 --> 01:05:49,910 and that it's such a complicated feeling, 1169 01:05:49,993 --> 01:05:52,871 and the one thing you wanna do is be able to let it go. 1170 01:05:52,954 --> 01:05:58,501 You're a singer, you're an actor, you worked into production, in fashion. 1171 01:05:58,585 --> 01:06:01,880 Is there any other hat you would like to try? 1172 01:06:02,672 --> 01:06:03,798 In future? 1173 01:06:04,466 --> 01:06:08,553 I gotta say I'll do a little bit of all of this for a while. 1174 01:06:08,637 --> 01:06:11,389 But eventually, when it all slows down for me, 1175 01:06:11,473 --> 01:06:15,560 I'm probably going to devote most of my life to philanthropy. 1176 01:06:16,228 --> 01:06:17,479 -Okay. That's good for me. -Yeah. 1177 01:06:18,188 --> 01:06:19,731 Wow. Thank you. 1178 01:06:21,316 --> 01:06:23,360 -Appreciate it. -Thank you very much. 1179 01:06:23,443 --> 01:06:25,028 Felt like you really understood. 1180 01:06:26,821 --> 01:06:27,864 All right, are we good? 1181 01:06:27,948 --> 01:06:29,908 -Yeah. -Getting on my nerves. 1182 01:06:33,578 --> 01:06:34,704 Can I sit, please? 1183 01:06:34,788 --> 01:06:35,956 Yeah, honey. 1184 01:06:36,873 --> 01:06:38,375 -Come on in. -We're done. 1185 01:06:38,458 --> 01:06:39,626 We're gonna change you. 1186 01:06:39,709 --> 01:06:42,254 -Fucking dumbest thing I've ever done. -What happened? 1187 01:06:43,088 --> 01:06:46,508 I'm done. I can't do that anymore. That's so stupid. 1188 01:06:46,591 --> 01:06:49,094 Do you know how, like, cheap it makes me feel? I-- 1189 01:06:49,177 --> 01:06:50,470 Yeah. 1190 01:06:50,554 --> 01:06:53,515 She was asking me questions, like, good ones, 1191 01:06:53,598 --> 01:06:57,143 and then she didn't even pay attention to what I was saying. 1192 01:06:59,437 --> 01:07:00,730 I don't wanna do that ever again. 1193 01:07:01,565 --> 01:07:03,483 I feel like a product. 1194 01:07:04,526 --> 01:07:05,610 Oh, God. 1195 01:07:10,073 --> 01:07:12,701 -It was, like, making me angry. -Yeah. 1196 01:07:13,577 --> 01:07:16,788 You know what it is, is it made me feel like Disney. 1197 01:07:17,789 --> 01:07:19,165 It's a trigger. 1198 01:07:19,249 --> 01:07:24,671 I don't-- I just-- I've spent years of my life trying to not be that. 1199 01:07:26,006 --> 01:07:28,258 I fucking look like a witch, 1200 01:07:28,341 --> 01:07:31,011 with the outfit doing it all-- like, the wand again. 1201 01:07:33,680 --> 01:07:35,682 -Whatever. It's fine. -You got it done. 1202 01:07:35,765 --> 01:07:37,309 -You don't have to do it again. -Yeah. 1203 01:07:46,359 --> 01:07:47,694 Hi. 1204 01:07:49,154 --> 01:07:50,947 Selena! 1205 01:07:54,993 --> 01:07:59,289 -Hi, Selena. How are you? -Selena! 1206 01:08:03,710 --> 01:08:05,795 Selena! 1207 01:08:07,380 --> 01:08:09,174 I'm going over there. 1208 01:08:09,674 --> 01:08:10,926 You're so pretty. Thank you. 1209 01:08:11,009 --> 01:08:13,637 How are you? It's okay. 1210 01:08:15,639 --> 01:08:17,723 It's okay. You're all good. 1211 01:08:17,807 --> 01:08:20,185 -Everything's-- Good tears, hopefully? -Yes, yes, yes. 1212 01:08:20,268 --> 01:08:21,102 Okay. 1213 01:08:21,186 --> 01:08:23,521 -Can we take a picture? -Yeah. Let's take a picture. 1214 01:08:23,605 --> 01:08:24,940 Selena, photo, quick! 1215 01:08:29,777 --> 01:08:32,030 -All right? -I'm good. Okay. 1216 01:08:57,222 --> 01:08:58,973 Do you want to do your morning meds? 1217 01:09:00,558 --> 01:09:04,228 I know the answer, but… you should. 1218 01:09:07,941 --> 01:09:09,817 Morning, Selena! 1219 01:09:18,493 --> 01:09:20,954 Just attach it to the inside or up and under. 1220 01:09:23,123 --> 01:09:25,040 Do you know what you're doing? 1221 01:09:25,125 --> 01:09:27,794 Nope. I work better that way. 1222 01:09:27,878 --> 01:09:30,839 Well, we're gonna leave you in the room, basically alone. 1223 01:09:30,922 --> 01:09:33,091 You're doing it to the mirror. It's a conversation with yourself. 1224 01:09:33,174 --> 01:09:35,427 -Okay. -And then you'll just hear 1225 01:09:36,553 --> 01:09:38,679 directions from-- coming from that speaker over there. 1226 01:09:38,763 --> 01:09:40,514 -Mkay. -And then we'll just roll with it. 1227 01:09:41,098 --> 01:09:42,392 -All right. -Awesome. 1228 01:09:44,102 --> 01:09:47,897 Hi, Selena. Could you please open the first envelope? 1229 01:09:52,402 --> 01:09:55,780 "A song that reminds you of being in love." 1230 01:10:07,208 --> 01:10:08,710 I don't know if I have one. 1231 01:10:11,213 --> 01:10:13,215 Envelope number two, please. 1232 01:10:18,762 --> 01:10:20,722 "What do you see when you look in the mirror?" 1233 01:10:20,805 --> 01:10:22,098 Why are they so deep? 1234 01:10:27,145 --> 01:10:28,230 I… 1235 01:10:31,524 --> 01:10:32,525 I see… 1236 01:10:35,570 --> 01:10:38,865 Yeah. Still working on what I see in the mirror, I suppose. 1237 01:10:41,534 --> 01:10:42,911 These are good questions. 1238 01:10:43,995 --> 01:10:46,623 What's your ultimate dream? 1239 01:10:48,083 --> 01:10:54,047 My ultimate dream is that I am able to save… 1240 01:10:54,881 --> 01:10:56,925 people's lives through… 1241 01:10:58,343 --> 01:10:59,344 through something, 1242 01:10:59,427 --> 01:11:04,766 whether it's a song, music, or if it's me, just speaking about the troubles 1243 01:11:04,849 --> 01:11:07,227 and the trials and tribulations that I had gone through. 1244 01:11:07,310 --> 01:11:12,566 That I could be a voice for others who maybe don't know what's going on 1245 01:11:12,649 --> 01:11:13,775 or what they're feeling. 1246 01:11:14,401 --> 01:11:16,444 That's what I hope. 1247 01:11:16,528 --> 01:11:19,197 Incredible. Thank you so much. 1248 01:11:31,126 --> 01:11:33,879 There is a girl who's crippled by anxiety 1249 01:11:35,380 --> 01:11:37,757 and can't move when she looks in the mirror. 1250 01:11:39,384 --> 01:11:43,638 She smiles when everyone is looking but cries when she's alone. 1251 01:11:45,265 --> 01:11:48,184 She hides because she's terrified to show herself. 1252 01:11:51,229 --> 01:11:52,647 My world is so empty. 1253 01:11:53,732 --> 01:11:55,775 My world is so big and cold. 1254 01:11:58,570 --> 01:12:00,196 I want joy and hope. 1255 01:12:01,281 --> 01:12:03,408 Clean air where I can finally breathe. 1256 01:12:05,201 --> 01:12:08,663 What has been is not what will be. 1257 01:12:24,179 --> 01:12:27,140 Why is everyone wearing a T-shirt that says "rare"? 1258 01:12:29,768 --> 01:12:32,270 Rare is out now. Rolling Stone loves it. 1259 01:12:32,354 --> 01:12:33,688 Billboard calls you triumphant. 1260 01:12:33,772 --> 01:12:36,691 Variety said Rare's one of the best pop albums to be released 1261 01:12:36,775 --> 01:12:38,401 -in recent memory. -This is Selena's 1262 01:12:38,485 --> 01:12:41,154 third studio album and her first in four years. 1263 01:12:41,238 --> 01:12:44,824 The singer saying, "It's by far the work I'm most proud of to date." 1264 01:12:45,659 --> 01:12:47,035 Kenya was like a dream. 1265 01:12:47,786 --> 01:12:50,664 When I even asked about boys, just out of curiosity 1266 01:12:50,747 --> 01:12:53,041 they were like, "No. 1267 01:12:53,124 --> 01:12:54,376 We're just"-- 1268 01:12:54,459 --> 01:12:57,504 You know, they giggled. They're like, "We want to do what we want to do, 1269 01:12:57,587 --> 01:12:59,673 and then it will happen." And I was like, preach. 1270 01:12:59,756 --> 01:13:01,174 That's awesome. 1271 01:13:01,258 --> 01:13:06,054 I mean, these girls were more confident than I was, and it was beautiful to see. 1272 01:13:06,137 --> 01:13:09,140 And at times-- I'm very… 1273 01:13:10,100 --> 01:13:11,893 I overthink 1274 01:13:11,977 --> 01:13:15,855 and I feel like if I'm not having some sort of aspect of my life 1275 01:13:15,939 --> 01:13:20,527 where I'm giving, it's not-- It makes me f-- 1276 01:13:20,610 --> 01:13:22,070 It doesn't make me feel good. It makes me feel 1277 01:13:22,153 --> 01:13:26,449 like I'm just taking, taking, taking and people should give me this 1278 01:13:26,533 --> 01:13:28,535 and give me that, 1279 01:13:28,618 --> 01:13:30,662 even though that's not my personality. 1280 01:13:30,745 --> 01:13:33,456 So now I want to make it a quarterly thing. 1281 01:13:34,124 --> 01:13:36,126 I have a dinner with Aleen and Zack, 1282 01:13:36,209 --> 01:13:38,003 and we're gonna discuss, you know, 1283 01:13:38,086 --> 01:13:39,170 -my goals. -Yeah. 1284 01:13:40,338 --> 01:13:45,468 Can we talk, for a minute, about the trip and the WE organization, 1285 01:13:45,552 --> 01:13:47,012 and why don't you start? 1286 01:13:47,095 --> 01:13:49,764 Like just tell us a little bit about what you're thinking. 1287 01:13:49,848 --> 01:13:53,393 I would love to find a way to build a curriculum 1288 01:13:53,476 --> 01:13:55,979 that can be taught in schools. 1289 01:13:56,062 --> 01:14:01,359 There's so much to be said about being connected with your emotions 1290 01:14:01,443 --> 01:14:02,694 and having that intelligence. 1291 01:14:02,777 --> 01:14:05,488 You're kind of like-- I mean, you're kinda fucked 1292 01:14:05,572 --> 01:14:07,032 -if you don't understand it. -You also-- 1293 01:14:07,115 --> 01:14:08,700 You have no compassion, you have no empathy. 1294 01:14:08,783 --> 01:14:10,452 -Yeah. -You have no way 1295 01:14:10,535 --> 01:14:13,371 of connecting with people because you don't even know how to. 1296 01:14:13,455 --> 01:14:16,207 This is sort of the thing that you want to be. 1297 01:14:16,291 --> 01:14:18,043 -it's something-- -You wanna do. 1298 01:14:18,126 --> 01:14:20,212 Very, very important to me. 1299 01:14:21,588 --> 01:14:25,383 I want to start today with discussion over a deadly new virus 1300 01:14:25,467 --> 01:14:28,470 that some health officials say might affect thousands 1301 01:14:28,553 --> 01:14:30,805 or even millions of people this year. 1302 01:14:30,889 --> 01:14:33,516 The second US case announced just this morning. 1303 01:14:33,600 --> 01:14:36,519 It's a new strain of what's called coronavirus. 1304 01:14:39,648 --> 01:14:41,316 Major cities across the country 1305 01:14:41,399 --> 01:14:43,026 are looking more like ghost towns. 1306 01:14:43,109 --> 01:14:45,779 Seemingly overnight, much of our daily lives have been 1307 01:14:45,862 --> 01:14:46,905 put on hold. 1308 01:14:46,988 --> 01:14:50,867 All Americans now trying to navigate what we're kind of calling "a new normal." 1309 01:14:51,910 --> 01:14:54,120 Infrastructure from large private companies 1310 01:14:54,204 --> 01:14:56,206 like Microsoft to the Department of Energy 1311 01:14:56,289 --> 01:14:59,334 and even the Department of Treasury all hit. 1312 01:14:59,417 --> 01:15:02,003 -Lawmakers are now demanding answers… -Hey Sel, 1313 01:15:02,087 --> 01:15:03,838 we're going to take your blood pressure. 1314 01:15:03,922 --> 01:15:05,173 Hello, Winnie. 1315 01:15:07,050 --> 01:15:08,802 Good evening, and thanks for joining us. 1316 01:15:08,885 --> 01:15:10,929 We begin with breaking news about WE Charity, 1317 01:15:11,012 --> 01:15:13,807 the organization at the heart of the latest ethics investigation 1318 01:15:13,890 --> 01:15:15,934 involving Prime Minister Justin Trudeau. 1319 01:15:16,017 --> 01:15:19,229 WE Charity is shutting down its Canadian operations. 1320 01:15:19,312 --> 01:15:21,606 The charity ran into trouble after the Liberal government 1321 01:15:21,690 --> 01:15:25,443 awarded it a sole-sourced, multimillion-dollar contract to run a… 1322 01:15:25,527 --> 01:15:27,696 The accusations against the WE Charity 1323 01:15:27,779 --> 01:15:31,908 made the work I had just planned to do with them impossible. 1324 01:15:33,076 --> 01:15:34,452 The most important thing… 1325 01:15:34,536 --> 01:15:37,581 It broke my heart because I had seen their good intentions, 1326 01:15:38,123 --> 01:15:41,376 and I had met the women in Kenya whose lives had been changed. 1327 01:15:41,877 --> 01:15:43,879 But now it was all so complicated. 1328 01:15:43,962 --> 01:15:46,172 We started the organization back in 1995 1329 01:15:46,256 --> 01:15:49,217 when we were kids in Thornhill, in our parent's basements, 1330 01:15:49,301 --> 01:15:52,220 -and this is our 25th anniversary… -Can't listen to it. That's such a bummer. 1331 01:15:52,888 --> 01:15:54,431 I was devastated. 1332 01:15:55,390 --> 01:15:56,391 I was angry. 1333 01:15:57,517 --> 01:16:01,980 The Covid-19 pandemic was beginning to cut us all off from friends and family. 1334 01:16:02,606 --> 01:16:06,109 And the purpose I had found in Kenya felt like it had been taken away. 1335 01:16:07,569 --> 01:16:09,946 Then just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, 1336 01:16:10,614 --> 01:16:11,615 it did. 1337 01:16:12,657 --> 01:16:13,700 I don't know. 1338 01:16:13,783 --> 01:16:14,993 My lupus. 1339 01:16:17,579 --> 01:16:18,705 You're in pain? 1340 01:16:19,706 --> 01:16:21,124 Give me a hug. I'm sorry. 1341 01:16:21,207 --> 01:16:22,709 -It's okay. -I love you. 1342 01:16:22,792 --> 01:16:24,336 I love you too. 1343 01:16:24,419 --> 01:16:25,837 It'll get better. 1344 01:16:26,463 --> 01:16:28,924 They're going to figure it out. You're going to feel better. 1345 01:16:29,007 --> 01:16:30,884 Is this what it felt like before, 1346 01:16:30,967 --> 01:16:32,552 when you found out you had lupus? 1347 01:16:33,261 --> 01:16:34,763 Yeah, but I was so young. 1348 01:16:34,846 --> 01:16:37,641 Like, I have not felt it since I was younger. 1349 01:16:38,266 --> 01:16:41,311 -Oh, my God. -And so, like, now, it just hurts, 1350 01:16:41,394 --> 01:16:43,688 like, in the morning when I wake up, 1351 01:16:44,397 --> 01:16:47,192 I immediately start crying because it hurts. 1352 01:16:47,275 --> 01:16:49,569 -Yeah. -Like, everything. 1353 01:16:50,403 --> 01:16:55,617 I've been having, like, really bad dreams about, like, my past and stuff. 1354 01:16:57,077 --> 01:17:02,040 I think my past and my mistakes, that's what drives me… 1355 01:17:04,251 --> 01:17:05,585 into depression. 1356 01:17:05,669 --> 01:17:08,380 It's like, my whole life since I was a kid, I have been working 1357 01:17:08,463 --> 01:17:11,383 and the only thing that I want is, like, a family. 1358 01:17:12,801 --> 01:17:15,345 I just, like, wanna be, like, a mom. 1359 01:17:15,428 --> 01:17:19,057 And I told Raquelle, I just, like, wanted to quit sometimes, 1360 01:17:19,140 --> 01:17:23,770 so I could just be happy and be normal like everybody else. 1361 01:17:24,729 --> 01:17:28,733 And she was just like, "I want you to know that I feel like God has given you 1362 01:17:28,817 --> 01:17:31,278 this platform not to quit." 1363 01:17:33,113 --> 01:17:35,282 I don't want to be, like, super famous. 1364 01:17:35,365 --> 01:17:36,908 I don't wanna be all that stuff. 1365 01:17:36,992 --> 01:17:40,745 But I do know that if I'm here, I have to use that for good. 1366 01:17:42,163 --> 01:17:45,458 I just feel stuck, and I just want to move forward. 1367 01:17:46,751 --> 01:17:47,961 Hello. 1368 01:17:48,044 --> 01:17:50,297 Hi, it's Dr. Wallace. 1369 01:17:50,380 --> 01:17:54,217 So I wanted to go over your results with you. 1370 01:17:54,301 --> 01:17:58,096 You have a positive rheumatoid factor, 1371 01:17:58,179 --> 01:18:04,978 which means that this is a lupus myositis rheumatoid overlap. 1372 01:18:05,061 --> 01:18:09,441 We could give you another dose of Rituxan which would probably, 1373 01:18:09,524 --> 01:18:11,318 at the rate you handle it, 1374 01:18:11,401 --> 01:18:15,739 get rid of your joint pain for probably a year or so. 1375 01:18:19,868 --> 01:18:20,911 Okay. 1376 01:18:20,994 --> 01:18:22,787 -Okay, bye. -Bye, Dr. Wallace. 1377 01:18:22,871 --> 01:18:24,247 -Bye. -Bye. 1378 01:18:28,668 --> 01:18:31,087 At least that explains some of why. 1379 01:18:32,714 --> 01:18:36,718 Yeah, I just always feel better when I have answers, 1380 01:18:38,094 --> 01:18:42,974 but the Rituxan was really hard to do last time, but I-- 1381 01:18:44,684 --> 01:18:45,894 What is it? 1382 01:18:45,977 --> 01:18:51,399 Rituxan is a treatment that they give you through an IV, 1383 01:18:51,483 --> 01:18:54,569 and it's about four hours, five hours. 1384 01:18:54,653 --> 01:19:00,242 It's really hard on your system at first, but it's okay. 1385 01:19:10,126 --> 01:19:11,127 It's okay. 1386 01:19:12,754 --> 01:19:17,092 They gave me something to relax because I can't stand being still. 1387 01:19:17,884 --> 01:19:20,095 My nana didn't wanna come, because she's-- 1388 01:19:21,137 --> 01:19:23,932 she's just seen me been put through all this. 1389 01:19:40,532 --> 01:19:42,033 Don't put it in your mouth. 1390 01:19:55,088 --> 01:19:56,089 Why am I here? 1391 01:19:57,007 --> 01:19:58,008 Why am I alive? 1392 01:19:58,091 --> 01:20:00,510 There she is, ballerina Thumbelina. 1393 01:20:01,011 --> 01:20:02,178 Clearly for something. 1394 01:20:04,639 --> 01:20:06,850 Baby's first bath. Let's see that rat. 1395 01:20:08,518 --> 01:20:10,020 All right, time for your bath. 1396 01:20:10,103 --> 01:20:11,354 Shut up. 1397 01:20:11,938 --> 01:20:14,608 I love my friends, love my family. I think I'm a great daughter. 1398 01:20:14,691 --> 01:20:18,695 I think I'm a great friend. And that means a lot to me. 1399 01:20:18,778 --> 01:20:21,114 What is happening? 1400 01:20:21,197 --> 01:20:25,327 But clearly, I'm still here to use whatever I have 1401 01:20:25,410 --> 01:20:26,578 to help someone else. 1402 01:20:30,415 --> 01:20:32,626 A part of my heart is still in Kenya, 1403 01:20:33,752 --> 01:20:37,964 but I felt guilty being there sometimes. 1404 01:20:38,590 --> 01:20:40,133 I don't know, I hate that. 1405 01:20:40,217 --> 01:20:44,971 I feel like I went, and I filmed, and I experienced. 1406 01:20:45,055 --> 01:20:48,683 But it's just so hard because I feel so selfish. 1407 01:20:48,767 --> 01:20:52,187 Yes, it was great. And yes, do I feel like I left an impact? Yes. 1408 01:20:52,270 --> 01:20:54,940 But do I feel like I've done enough? No. 1409 01:20:55,023 --> 01:20:58,610 Talking to someone about mental health in Kenya, 1410 01:21:01,029 --> 01:21:03,406 that's beautiful, you know. 1411 01:21:03,490 --> 01:21:04,783 I don't know-- 1412 01:21:05,575 --> 01:21:07,202 I don't know if I felt like, 1413 01:21:07,285 --> 01:21:09,663 "Oh, I did it, and I'm such a great person." 1414 01:21:09,746 --> 01:21:12,707 It's like, you know, this is the beginning for me. 1415 01:21:20,215 --> 01:21:22,717 Hi everyone. I'm Selena Gomez. 1416 01:21:22,801 --> 01:21:28,181 And for World Mental Health Day, I wanted to invite Dr. Murthy, 1417 01:21:28,265 --> 01:21:31,268 the surgeon general, to chat with me about loneliness 1418 01:21:31,351 --> 01:21:36,439 and helping people access the resources they need to support their mental health. 1419 01:21:37,023 --> 01:21:39,150 That's very kind of you, Selena. I'm really glad 1420 01:21:39,234 --> 01:21:40,610 that we're having this conversation. 1421 01:21:40,694 --> 01:21:44,823 What we were facing pre-Covid-19 was already pretty challenging 1422 01:21:44,906 --> 01:21:48,702 in terms of high rates of loneliness and depression and anxiety, 1423 01:21:48,785 --> 01:21:51,913 and I worry that that's gotten worse for a lot of people. 1424 01:21:51,997 --> 01:21:57,752 How do we identify loneliness in ourselves and in others? 1425 01:21:57,836 --> 01:22:01,798 And do the symptoms of loneliness always look like being alone? 1426 01:22:02,382 --> 01:22:04,259 It's really hard to tell. 1427 01:22:04,342 --> 01:22:06,970 Even in a crowd, you can feel profoundly lonely. 1428 01:22:07,053 --> 01:22:09,681 And this is why the world is filled with so many people 1429 01:22:09,764 --> 01:22:12,475 who seemingly have it all, right? 1430 01:22:12,559 --> 01:22:16,605 They, you know, are famous, or they're wealthy, or they're powerful. 1431 01:22:16,688 --> 01:22:19,941 But what really matters is the quality of connections that we have. 1432 01:22:20,025 --> 01:22:21,943 That whenever we have interactions 1433 01:22:22,027 --> 01:22:24,070 with people where we feel like we can't be ourselves, 1434 01:22:24,154 --> 01:22:27,532 that actually separates us further and further from other people. 1435 01:22:27,616 --> 01:22:28,950 Yeah. 1436 01:22:29,034 --> 01:22:32,704 And service, it turns out, is one of the greatest antidotes 1437 01:22:32,787 --> 01:22:34,372 to loneliness that we have. 1438 01:22:34,456 --> 01:22:37,125 We reaffirm to ourselves that we have value 1439 01:22:37,208 --> 01:22:38,418 to bring to the world, 1440 01:22:38,501 --> 01:22:40,795 and it doesn't have to be going to a soup kitchen. 1441 01:22:40,879 --> 01:22:44,216 Simply by being fully present and listening to someone. 1442 01:22:44,299 --> 01:22:46,885 We can give them something extraordinarily powerful. 1443 01:22:46,968 --> 01:22:48,261 Right. 1444 01:22:48,345 --> 01:22:52,557 And so the journey, Selena, to become more connected to ourselves, 1445 01:22:52,641 --> 01:22:54,643 to connect more deeply with other people, 1446 01:22:54,726 --> 01:22:57,062 is not a journey to somehow transform ourselves 1447 01:22:57,145 --> 01:22:58,146 into something we're not. 1448 01:22:58,230 --> 01:23:01,441 It's really a journey to return to who we intrinsically are, 1449 01:23:01,524 --> 01:23:03,276 -being centered at our best… -Wow. 1450 01:23:03,360 --> 01:23:06,363 …and experiencing our greatest meaning and fulfillment 1451 01:23:06,446 --> 01:23:08,531 when we're giving and receiving that love. 1452 01:23:09,115 --> 01:23:12,410 Mic drop. I mean, that was amazing. 1453 01:23:14,829 --> 01:23:15,747 Okay. 1454 01:23:15,830 --> 01:23:17,332 You wanna come down with me? No? 1455 01:23:33,640 --> 01:23:35,725 "Finish the sentences. 1456 01:23:35,809 --> 01:23:41,648 Strangers who would describe me as… only I know that I am…" 1457 01:23:43,525 --> 01:23:50,448 Strangers would describe you as, like, a warm sort of all-American girl. 1458 01:23:50,532 --> 01:23:53,326 And I think people would be surprised, 1459 01:23:53,410 --> 01:23:56,621 and only you know maybe how complex you are. 1460 01:23:56,705 --> 01:23:58,665 There's a lot of layers to who you are. 1461 01:23:58,748 --> 01:24:01,001 And there's a lot of different sides of you. 1462 01:24:02,627 --> 01:24:04,045 -Oh, sorry. -What would you say, Ash? 1463 01:24:05,338 --> 01:24:06,798 Yeah, I think that's a great answer. 1464 01:24:09,134 --> 01:24:10,135 Okay. 1465 01:24:10,218 --> 01:24:14,514 "Do you believe everyone has a calling? If so, do you think I've found mine?" 1466 01:24:15,098 --> 01:24:17,267 Yes, I believe everybody has a calling. 1467 01:24:17,350 --> 01:24:22,355 I think that you know what yours is, but you don't always choose to walk in it. 1468 01:24:23,356 --> 01:24:24,357 Agreed. 1469 01:24:27,027 --> 01:24:28,028 What do you mean? 1470 01:24:28,570 --> 01:24:30,906 I think that you know the things that fuel you 1471 01:24:30,989 --> 01:24:34,409 and give you purpose in life, and the things that make you happy. 1472 01:24:35,452 --> 01:24:38,830 But I don't think you always choose that. 1473 01:24:38,914 --> 01:24:41,458 Yeah, that's probably self-sabotage. 1474 01:24:42,167 --> 01:24:44,085 Yeah, that's exactly what it is. 1475 01:24:44,169 --> 01:24:45,921 I think stuff being normal 1476 01:24:46,004 --> 01:24:48,506 -or not having chaos… -Right. 1477 01:24:48,590 --> 01:24:51,843 …is actually uncomfortable, 'cause if you think about it, 1478 01:24:51,927 --> 01:24:54,638 your life for so long, from such a young age, 1479 01:24:54,721 --> 01:24:57,015 has always been chaos. 1480 01:24:58,683 --> 01:24:59,851 -Right? -Yeah. 1481 01:25:01,186 --> 01:25:04,105 So it makes sense. It's, like, more comfortable. 1482 01:25:06,816 --> 01:25:09,986 -Yeah, no that's nuts. Oh, it sucks. -Yeah. 1483 01:25:10,070 --> 01:25:14,449 But the good thing is that you know. You know the things that fulfill you. 1484 01:25:14,532 --> 01:25:15,909 -You know what makes you happy. -You're very smart. 1485 01:25:15,992 --> 01:25:17,869 You know what's not going to make you happy. 1486 01:25:33,510 --> 01:25:34,719 I love you. 1487 01:25:35,470 --> 01:25:36,805 She's a lot calmer, right? 1488 01:25:37,556 --> 01:25:39,266 That's so great. She usually will move her hand. 1489 01:25:44,688 --> 01:25:48,358 I see you, and you see me. 1490 01:25:48,441 --> 01:25:51,319 And that's because I look like your mom. 1491 01:25:53,822 --> 01:25:56,199 -Look at my mom. -Oh, my goodness. 1492 01:25:56,283 --> 01:25:57,617 Do I look like my mom? 1493 01:25:57,701 --> 01:25:58,660 Yes. 1494 01:25:58,743 --> 01:26:00,662 -What? -Oh, the bangs. 1495 01:26:00,745 --> 01:26:03,123 Look at her marrying my stepdad, Brian. 1496 01:26:04,332 --> 01:26:06,459 Yeah, he's been such a great dad to me. 1497 01:26:06,543 --> 01:26:08,837 -That is so sweet. So cute. -That's awesome. 1498 01:26:21,141 --> 01:26:23,184 -Selena? Hey. -Hi. 1499 01:26:23,268 --> 01:26:25,353 -How's it going, girl? -Good, how are you? 1500 01:26:25,437 --> 01:26:26,438 I'm good. 1501 01:26:26,521 --> 01:26:27,522 They don't bite. 1502 01:26:27,606 --> 01:26:28,940 Hey. 1503 01:26:29,024 --> 01:26:30,400 This one's my youngest. 1504 01:26:30,483 --> 01:26:32,277 -That's my cousin's daughter… -Oh, my gosh. 1505 01:26:32,360 --> 01:26:35,030 …and my other two aren't here because my son has leukemia. 1506 01:26:35,113 --> 01:26:38,283 -Oh, no. -So he stayed in at his other mom's house, 1507 01:26:38,366 --> 01:26:40,076 and his sister wanted to stay with him. 1508 01:26:40,160 --> 01:26:40,994 Yeah. 1509 01:26:41,077 --> 01:26:42,579 So we left them there. 1510 01:26:42,662 --> 01:26:44,205 What's that? Are you trying to scare me? 1511 01:26:44,289 --> 01:26:45,290 Do you know who this is? 1512 01:26:46,958 --> 01:26:47,959 It's Selena Gomez. 1513 01:26:48,043 --> 01:26:49,711 My name is Selena. 1514 01:26:49,794 --> 01:26:52,214 The one that you hear the songs of? 1515 01:26:52,297 --> 01:26:53,215 Yeah. 1516 01:27:03,934 --> 01:27:05,936 She's my dramatic one. 1517 01:27:06,019 --> 01:27:07,604 Well, that was me. 1518 01:27:09,314 --> 01:27:11,233 Come here, baba. No? 1519 01:27:11,316 --> 01:27:13,109 -Yeah, you're the alpha male. -I didn't know she was real. 1520 01:27:13,193 --> 01:27:14,277 Yes, she's real. 1521 01:27:14,361 --> 01:27:15,737 Mommy went to school with her. 1522 01:27:15,820 --> 01:27:18,073 She lived right down the street from me. 1523 01:27:18,156 --> 01:27:19,574 Mommy grew up with her. 1524 01:27:19,658 --> 01:27:21,284 Can I have a hug? 1525 01:27:21,952 --> 01:27:23,995 Yeah. 1526 01:27:24,579 --> 01:27:25,664 Does that make you happy? 1527 01:27:25,747 --> 01:27:26,706 Yes! 1528 01:27:28,208 --> 01:27:30,293 -Just wanted to say hello. -Well, thank you. I appreciate it. 1529 01:27:30,377 --> 01:27:32,546 -It was good seeing you. -Of course. It was so good to see you. 1530 01:27:32,629 --> 01:27:34,881 -I'm glad everything's good with you. -Yeah. 1531 01:27:34,965 --> 01:27:37,968 Went better. Trust me, it was a little scary at that point, 1532 01:27:38,051 --> 01:27:42,389 'cause I grew up with you, I knew. So, to see you go through that was hard. 1533 01:27:42,472 --> 01:27:44,641 Yeah. Thank you, I do feel better. 1534 01:27:44,724 --> 01:27:46,059 We love y'all. 1535 01:27:46,142 --> 01:27:49,813 -Okay bye, honey. Bye-bye. -Say "Bye." Say "Thank you." 1536 01:27:55,151 --> 01:27:57,696 When you're struggling with your mental health, 1537 01:27:57,779 --> 01:28:01,908 the essential part of it is knowing what to do 1538 01:28:01,992 --> 01:28:03,535 and recognizing that. 1539 01:28:05,412 --> 01:28:07,622 It's something that I'm not ashamed of. 1540 01:28:10,208 --> 01:28:13,920 I had to relearn things that completely fell out of my mind. 1541 01:28:14,004 --> 01:28:16,798 It was like, "Hey, you're not a bad person. 1542 01:28:16,882 --> 01:28:18,425 You're not a gross person. 1543 01:28:18,508 --> 01:28:21,261 You're not crazy. You're not any of this 1544 01:28:21,344 --> 01:28:23,680 but you're gonna have to deal with this. 1545 01:28:23,763 --> 01:28:26,892 I know it's a lot, but this is the reality." 1546 01:28:26,975 --> 01:28:33,815 And I found having a relationship with bipolar and myself, it's… 1547 01:28:34,816 --> 01:28:35,817 it's gonna be there. 1548 01:28:36,610 --> 01:28:38,403 I'm just making it my friend now. 1549 01:28:40,322 --> 01:28:43,533 I think that I needed to go through that to be who I am, 1550 01:28:43,617 --> 01:28:45,493 and then I'm gonna keep going through it, 1551 01:28:46,077 --> 01:28:47,412 but I'm really happy. 1552 01:28:50,290 --> 01:28:51,499 I'm at peace. 1553 01:28:53,376 --> 01:28:54,336 I'm angry. 1554 01:28:56,129 --> 01:28:57,214 I'm sad. 1555 01:29:00,467 --> 01:29:01,593 I'm confident. 1556 01:29:02,802 --> 01:29:04,512 I'm full of doubt. 1557 01:29:06,598 --> 01:29:08,475 I'm a work in progress. 1558 01:29:12,646 --> 01:29:13,772 I am enough. 1559 01:29:17,442 --> 01:29:18,902 I am Selena. 1560 01:30:20,213 --> 01:30:22,257 -Thank you for having us today. -Of course. 1561 01:30:22,340 --> 01:30:25,093 I wanted people to understand that what I did for this process 1562 01:30:25,176 --> 01:30:28,430 was giving you guys, like, my heart essentially, 1563 01:30:28,513 --> 01:30:33,059 and see how you would take my words and put them into a record. 1564 01:30:33,143 --> 01:30:34,853 I've never done that before. Have you guys? 1565 01:30:34,936 --> 01:30:36,813 -No, I-- Yeah. -Diary entries, journal entries? 1566 01:30:36,897 --> 01:30:38,732 -No, that's super intimate. -'Course. 1567 01:30:38,815 --> 01:30:40,901 I'm happy we didn't butcher your journal entries. 1568 01:30:40,984 --> 01:30:42,193 No, you didn't.