Artem and I are gonna get married.
- [gasps] - Oh, yay.
In, like, four weeks.
- In what? - What?
I would love to get my parents.
Yeah, what's happening with that?
My parents cannot make it to Napa for the wedding.
I don't even know yet how you feel of me,
like, wearing my dress and--
That's the least thing on my mind.
If my parents will never meet my son in person,
that'd be the most devastating thing to me.
Maybe we just go elope somewhere we love.
Oh, my gosh, imagine what my dress
would look like in France.
[upbeat music]
[camera shutter clicking]
♪
Oh, my gosh, gorgeous.
Oh, my gosh, stunning.
Wow.
Great. You're good. - [laughs]
Eileen, so have you booked your flight to Paris yet?
- [laughs] - Yeah?
I think I'll make it to your wedding to do your makeup.
You better.
- Well... - Is it booked?
It's booked, right?
Is your venue booked?
No.
I'm totally starting to feel the ticking clock.
Trying to find this place in Paris, France,
and being in Napa Valley
and not speaking French is so hard.
And so right now we have one venue in Paris,
which we love it, but we're not in love with it.
It's not the Paris that we love.
Whatever happened with that conversation
with you and Artem, where he got, like, so mad?
So, Paul, you missed it.
In front of Eileen and Brie,
I forgot to tell him I canceled it.
It was only in a conver--
And she wasn't even telling him.
She was telling Brie and I, and he walks in,
and he's like, "Wait, what?"
Do you think the pecking order will change
once you're married?
It'll be, like, Artem then Brie,
or is it still gonna always be Brie first, then Artem?
For information, anyways. - Well, Brie's just so helpful.
But it's hard--
She's just an extension of you.
It's just being a twin, yeah.
So hard.
All right.
That's good.
Here comes the bride.
Oh, my goodness!
Oh, my gosh, that's amazing.
[camera shutter clicking]
♪
OK, because I have your full attention
because you're driving, we are gonna go over some details.
Your bachelorette.
So Artem and I are doing this joint
bachelor-bachelorette party,
and we thought LA would be perfect.
Hollywood has all those fun bars and speakeasies
and, like, sexy feels.
And we just need to figure out
what we're seeing, what we're doing.
It'll be fun.
It's not like I want dudes' butts in my face,
and he doesn't want chicks' boobs in his face.
So, like, let's just do it together.
I'd rather have Artem's ass in my face
and put my tits in his.
I haven't had, like, a weekend to let loose...
I don't think since I had Matteo, right?
Right.
♪
[speaking Russian]
- Cheers. - Cheers.
- How is it going? - It's going good.
You being the best man,
you still need to figure it out,
the bachelor party.
Bachelor party?
Have you had any thoughts?
[sighs]
I mean, I wanna do something for you.
I've never been, actually, to a bachelor party in Russia,
but I've heard people go to the sauna,
drink vodka, run around naked in the snow.
What if we do, like,
some kind of, like, a cooking thing?
I feel like everybody loves to cook.
Uh, I mean, cooking might be a little bit--
- Fishing would be fun. - Yeah.
- Big tuna. - Yeah.
That's really weird.
But for Artem, he's a very calm, quiet guy.
So he doesn't like to get drunk.
He doesn't like to go to a strip club.
He doesn't like to go crazy.
That could be good.
[quirky music]
♪
Your bridal shower was amazing, elegant, fun.
But for the bachelorette, I want the complete opposite.
Lady in the sheets on the train--
- Uh... - No, lady in the sheets--
I'm no lady in the sheets.
I'm the lady in the streets.
I'm a freak in the sheets.
Bridal shower's lady on the street.
Bachelorette is going to be a freak in the sheets.
So pretty much the bachelorette theme
is Brie mode.
Brie mode! [all screaming]
Why did I lose my shoe?
You make me feel like a rock star!
That actually was nice. - That was good.
Yeah, that was a good one.
I invited a lot of our wrestling girlfriends.
Those girls-- - You bring me my Total Divas,
we'll get crazy and have fun. - Yes.
Ariane. - Ariane?
Yep.
CJ.
No way.
Is Nattie not coming?
- Oh, my gosh, Nattie! - Nattie!
I knew I was forgetting the greatest one of all.
I was gonna say, Nattie better come.
I think Artem now is booking a dancing gig
and is flying out Saturday evening.
OK, then we gotta have one fun night.
You know what I think would be really cool?
What?
Like, remember when Jessica Simpson did
that, like, cute, fun, popping out of cake for Nick?
Was it his bachelor party?
- Go. - Oops.
I feel like I've never done anything like that for Artem.
What are you thinking, like, be a stripper...
- I don't know. - For a night, for Artem?
No. I don't know.
Like, you could definitely take some fun classes
and do stuff like that.
Do you think I do something like that, jump out of a cake?
I mean, do you jump out of a cake and go, "Boo!
Happy bachelor party."
Yeah, you're right.
[upbeat music]
By the way, if there is any maid of honor dresses here,
we should have you try them on. - I know.
OK.
Hi!
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my God, look how cute this is!
I think what's been so fun about wedding planning
is all the amazing outfits you get for all your events.
So you obviously have the rehearsal dinner,
then you have the wedding, but the ceremony,
and then you have reception, then you have brunch.
And so I'm really digging this part
of getting married, all the outfits.
So I already have this gorgeous wedding dress.
So she's looking for a wedding rehearsal dress.
Or one even after too.
That's called a rehearsal dress.
- Oh. - Reception.
Reception! I'm sorry.
I was like, that's a rehearsal after?
Like, didn't I already say it?
Yeah, right? [laughter]
Do you need a night before?
I do actually need a night before.
I think it would be good for you guys to look through
and see, like, what catches your eye
and what you're drawn to.
OK.
That base is really pretty.
Not really big with florals, you know what I mean?
Oh, wow. - The reception, right?
Reception, yeah.
OK, I'll try that one.
How pretty that would be, if it was not as white,
for, like, the night before?
Now, that's, like, after reception style.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
Try it on, for sure. - Yeah, let's do this.
But what's the venue? Is it, like, outside?
Is it-- - Good question.
That's what we're still waiting for.
[laughter]
We decided to plan a wedding in four weeks.
I love it.
See, she loves it.
That's like--I'm always like, we'll make it work.
- Yeah. - We can figure it out.
We're fine. - Yes, exactly.
How about this?
Do you wanna try something like this?
Should I?
I mean, it's your call.
It's your wedding.
It is kind of fun.
- Oh, yeah. - Yeah.
- There's something about it. - I'll try that too.
It's like I got a lot of great options.
[upbeat music]
♪
Whoa. Oh, my gosh. That girl is so hot.
It looks amazing from behind.
That is so hot.
It is ridiculous.
- I love this ribbing for me. - Mm-hmm.
OK.
I'm ready.
[gasps] Oh, my gosh.
Nicole.
- Right? - Oh, my gosh.
It looks great.
- I'm obsessed. - Yeah.
- There's something about this. - This is like Vogue.
- Yes. - I feel like I'm walking in
a, like, Paris fashion house.
- Yes. - Right?
Like a champagne flute.
That's exactly what you look like.
Anyone wanna pop me?
- Already been popped. - [laughs]
I did not think I would ever like another bridal gown.
Whoa!
I actually forgot how pretty it was.
I think it's down the aisle.
Like, I mean, look at you.
How does this feel?
I feel like this dress represents, like,
the woman I always wanted to become, and now I am.
- Love. - Right?
That's what I'm talking about, girl.
Yeah.
Usually you're like a girl when you get married,
but I'm a woman when I get married.
[laughter]
I birthed a kid, I'm almost 40, so--
this feels like-- yeah, like the dress
you kind of own the world in.
You do.
Here I came into this bridal shop thinking
I just needed a reception dress.
And then there she was.
I can actually visualize myself in this dress
walking down the aisle.
Like, I was beyond content with mine,
and that one was a dream.
And then now I've realized this other one is a dream.
But I'm like, shoot, now what do I do?
Your other dress is very special and gorgeous.
And you bought them in a moment that felt right then.
But I feel like you're a different person
than you were four years ago.
So what are you thinking?
I mean, I'm actually--
I'm kinda thinking doing the new, the Vogue.
Out with the old, in with the new.
You, like, just love, love being right,
and it's so gross.
I'm really proud of her because it's really hard
to disconnect from the past.
And she's just confident, happy, filled with so much
joy, excitement, and love.
I'm like, yes!
I'll have what she's having. [laughs]
Artem, your girl's gonna have a new dress, all for you.
That's right, baby boy.
Party's here! [all cheering]
Mazel tov.
Am I really about to do a pole dance?
[all cheering]
Bobbing for dildos.
I think I'm gonna bring that out,
even for, like, the holidays.
[all cheering]
[upbeat music]
♪
Oh, yes!
Whoa, I got a lot to learn!
Hi, I'm Nikki. - Hi.
Joshua, nice to meet you. - Oh, nice to meet you, Joshua.
So I brought goodies.
I don't know if you like White Claw, tequila drinks.
- Are you feeling nervous? - A little bit, yeah.
- OK. You're gonna be fine. - No, actually a lot.
I'm not gonna lie. - No, you're gonna be so good.
Like, you are such an elite athlete.
You're a dancer. Like, this is gonna be so fun.
- Well, cheers to that. - Cheers.
So after talking to Brie, we've decided
that I'm gonna do a sexy striptease for Artem.
And so I have to take a pole dancing class.
And Brie said that she could provide the pole at the club.
And I'm gonna learn some sexy moves
to show my future husband.
I mean, I just truly hope that I can
feel empowered and confident enough
to pull this off.
My fiancé is professional dancer.
I wanna do something sexy for him, but at the same time,
I'm kind of embarrassed because, obviously,
everyone who's gonna be there is gonna be
a professional dancer.
I feel like I used to be, like, a total sexpot,
and I feel like I've kind of lost that.
I'm past the wrestling ring.
I've birthed an incredible human being.
Your body does change.
Your back expands, your hips go up and they don't go back,
your feet get bigger, and you just look different.
You don't look like what you did, and you never will.
It's just hard to accept at times.
And I get it, not everyone's gonna, you know--
is in little underwear on the pole.
But I am.
I feel like I just threw myself into therapy
in, like, a physical way.
You know, the thing I love about pole is,
there's really, like, a style and a place for everybody.
Yeah.
So it's totally fine
for you to be feeling what you're feeling.
And we're just gonna, like, find things
that look great on your body and that you feel
really confident in doing.
And just, like, props for being like, "I'm gonna do, like,
"one or two pole lessons and then go perform
in front of a bunch of people."
I mean,----.
But you're gonna blow people away.
Oh, yay! I'm excited for that.
Go ahead and touch it. Just grab it, touch it.
And I want you to think of the pole as your dance partner.
And you can tease it, seduce it, wrap around it.
So you just have fun with that.
Arm up high.
Shift your weight into your right hip as you step.
Yes, right. - Wow, that's a hard walk.
And then... - Arms up.
Good. And then--yes!
I can just hear my sister laughing.
[laughter]
And then booty first.
Slide it down.
And then, "Uh!"
Back up. Yes.
And maybe it's really uncomfortable.
It is so uncomfortable.
But you know what?
It's gonna get really natural really fast now.
Seeing myself like that and, um--
just my body.
- Yeah. - Things are different.
Even, like, people who are really comfortable
and confident with themselves, it takes a little bit of time
to just get used to just seeing yourself...
- Yeah. - And just being with yourself.
What I have learned is,
pole dancing is a legitimate sport.
What sucks about it is, like, you're pretty naked.
And you're trying to be impressive,
but do I look impressive?
Like, I'm an athlete, so I want it to be good,
but I know where I'm at.
So why did I think I'd have time to do this?
All right, here we go.
[empowering pop music]
♪ I'm looking at the clock, time drops ♪
Yeah, gorgeous.
Yes, that's right!
Walk it around.
♪ I'm finally letting go
♪ I'm feeling better than I did before ♪
♪ Stop, drop, roll, move aside ♪
♪ I'm gonna be my own best friend tonight ♪
♪
- We gotta make it us. - Oh, my gosh!
Look at that view and that pool!
If you're gonna have an LA bachelorette, like,
you need these views, right?
This is when you feel like you're living large.
I'm such a good maid of honor in the way I plan.
Yeah.
So I gotta give it to Brie. The house is incredible.
Like, this is a dream for a bachelor-bachelorette party.
Brie, will you look at the rooms, and then JJ
and then Nattie will be tomorrow night.
Artem and Gleb thought a perfect bachelor-bachelorette
party weekend would be to go fishing
and then cook together, do a cooking class,
I think it was, and then do a CrossFit class.
I was like, OK, no one's gonna show up to be bored to death.
- Like, boring. - I mean beyond.
So I knew Brie had to step in.
Did you see the flowers I ordered?
- Oh, did you order some? - Yeah.
I booked a Hollywood club.
I booked a caterer.
I booked a hot bartender.
I booked a pool party where we'll be bobbing for dildos.
Yeah.
I mean, I even got, like, a penis piñata.
Oh, yeah.
I got high-end alcohol, delicious food,
gorgeous men, hot women.
The location.
So I stepped up-- solo, on my own.
And I got a cute outfit.
A little insecure about it 'cause you can't wear tights.
You're just gonna go slutty?
I'm nervous.
And I--and I think I'm more nervous now
because I'm so sore.
Just put some Bengay on.
Oh, awesome, Bengay before I go.
That smell. Artem will probably love it.
It'll remind him of dancing.
Well, this is a cool house.
Thank you.
I'm your neighbor. - You are?
So if you have sex tonight, I'm gonna be able to hear you.
So what are you saying? Like, don't do it?
No, you can do it. I'll put on my white noise.
Done deal.
[upbeat music]
♪
Oh, look who's ready!
Let's go!
[both grunting]
You've met Shawna before.
- Yes, what's up? Yeah? - You need an iron, right?
I got an iron, I got a board.
Gimme a little runway walk.
Full, one, two, three,
four, one, hey!
Let's go see the view.
The pool is a bit small though, no?
- It wraps around. - Artem, look at my nipples.
Is that gonna--is that bad?
Well I didn't notice it till now.
I mean, who makes a dress where your nipple
pops right through?
I'm gonna go ask Shawna if she has
nipple covers, just in case.
- Let's party! - Let's party!
How could we not at this place?
I can't wait to party.
Oh, my gosh!
So pretty.
Amazing weather.
I know, right?
I mean, this house is unreal.
I think I'm, like, maid of honor of the year.
Well, we'll see. It ain't done.
Well, actually...
so I really need your help, because in Paris right now,
nothing is working out.
No venue, no nothing.
Well, mine was bridal shower and bachelorette,
so my checklist is done.
No, no, no, wait, wait, wait, Brie.
Since Artem and I decided to get married in Paris,
I've had a lot more to do.
I've just been looking at venues nonstop.
It's very S, which I like.
Yeah.
I had to look at good plane deals for my family,
so we've been booking flights, found them an amazing hotel.
Oh, my gosh, I've been looking into wedding planners.
Still waiting for someone to respond.
Brie, do you have a sec?
I want to talk about the maid of honor dresses.
We want something with tulle, very Vogue.
We have rehearsal dinner locked in, which is great,
even though I keep adding more people, which isn't great.
And I need to figure out the rest of the wedding.
Let me show you this place that I fell in love with.
Look at that room, Brie.
And then scroll to the left.
Oh, yeah.
Well, are they available?
Let's see. Let's just call and see.
I literally can't believe we're doing this
at your bachelorette party.
OK, just one thing to get off the checklist--
You know you're gonna throw me a party
once this is all done because...
Don't make this about you right now.
The stress you have put me through.
Shh! Don't make it about you.
- Want me to get you a drink? - Yeah.
I mean, I've been drinking a live mushroom elixir.
It's just like-- - Oh, Jesus, that's so LA.
[speaking French]
Your venue online, do you do weddings?
We do weddings, yes, sometimes.
So would you maybe be open to book
a wedding in, like, two weeks?
This month?
No, Madame.
No, we are very booked.
It's August, you know, and lot of people, they don't work,
you know, they're on vacations.
All right, well, thank you.
OK, bonsoir. Au revoir.
Au revoir. Bye.
[tense music]
You know all the things you need for a wedding?
- Yeah. - I'm not even lying to you,
like, I have nothing.
Why did I think that I could,
like, plan something in four weeks?
Oh, my gosh.
[upbeat music]
Whoo!
Hi!
- How are you? - Oh, my, look at you.
Best man, maid of honor.
- Yeah. - Ready to make magic happen?
- Yeah. - Yay!
[all cheering]
- Oh, my gosh, you guys! - There she is.
Oh, my God, I can't believe you all are here.
Oh, my God, we wouldn't have missed it for the world.
You guys have no idea how much it means.
Ariane is one of the OGs of total divas.
And you dance?
Used to make her dance all the time in the rain.
Even though I was like, fake it till you make it.
[laughs]
Look at these two! [all cheering]
JJ!
- How are you? - I'm so happy.
Yay! - Congratulations.
Nicole needs a little sippy-sippy of tequila.
No.
A little shot, come on.
This is Nicole's turn.
This is your bachelorette party.
Who has a bachelor-bachelorette party
and says we're not gonna get nuts?
OK, this can be the only shot.
Yeah.
[all cheering]
all: [chanting] Do it! Do it!
We made Nicole take a shot.
Mazel tov.
Artem, I heard that Russians can't really drink.
I'm just kidding. [laughs] He's like--
Hey, put this on and sip up.
Yes!
Whoo!
There you are. [all cheering]
Gotta make sure you did it right.
Yeah, cause we're gonna judge it.
Shut up! [laughter]
How fun is this?
- This is so fun. - Right?
I mean, I love it because I have, like,
my WWE era over there,
here's dancing, Hooters over there.
You guys used to work at Hooters?
Yeah.
That's why we became kick-ass women.
I'm very confused.
Like, it's a bachelor party, but you're also here.
It's like--and then it's your bachelorette party,
but he's here.
So what's going on?
That's what happens when you get married at their age.
[laughter] - Wow.
- [growls] - [shrieking]
- J, don't! - Don't jump!
- Artem! - Artem!
- No, Artem! - Artem!
No. Don't you dare.
This is the best. Brie did all this.
She's amazing.
She keeps reminding me that she's
maid of honor of the year, and I owe her
a vacation after all of this.
- OK. - [laughs]
We're leaving in one hour,
so please eat, get your stomachs,
like, a good foundation because we're gonna do
a lot of drinking at the venue.
It's gonna be even more fun.
My tummy sucks, you guys.
Stop!
In front of all you guys.
Am I really about to do a pole dance?
Who do you think I am, Dita Von Teese?
Absolutely not. So what am I doing?
I'm gonna head out, you guys.
What do you mean, you're heading out?
I have to go make sure the place is right.
I have to go do a few things before you guys arrive.
♪
It's really weird because I'm having an issue.
Pole dancing is actually like a sport.
I mean, it's really fricking hard.
It's like a sport.
And so I'm like, I feel like I'm gonna go out there,
and it's-- like. I'm not gonna deliver.
You're gonna shock everyone because they're gonna be like,
where did that come from?
I know, but my first thought is like,
why am I performing this if I'm not
ready or perfection at this?
Because you're getting married,
and you're trying to turn your man on,
and it's really hot.
Yeah, with my brother and my sister right there.
To get into small underwear
and put on a very sexy performance
for your man in front of 15 to 20 people
that you know personally, you're very vulnerable.
Thank you.
Nicole's at the venue getting it ready for all of us
to have fun!
There you go!
[all cheering]
[indistinct shouting]
OK, let's go!
both:
Let's get weird! Let's get weird!
Let's go!
Let's go celebrate Artem and Nicole!
[all cheering]
We're gonna do the birdcage first.
Cage comes down, two people hold it
because it's gonna have to move just a little bit.
- Oh,----! - Are you okay?
- As I, like, nail my head. - Oh, wow!
What the---- am I doing?
I'm, like, just so nervous. Like, it's crazy.
I can't even drink tequila, I'm that nervous.
[tense music]
[all cheering]
Ever, ever, ever, ever!
OK, is everyone ready?
[imitating explosions] [all cheering]
Oh, my gosh.
I'm, like, freaking out.
They're about to walk in.
[all cheering]
[upbeat music]
♪
all: Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!
- How you feeling, Artem? - Great.
- Where is Nicole? - Where is she?
She's coming.
OK.
I just can't help but, like, get insecure too and think,
like, is Artem really gonna like this,
or is he gonna just be, like, a pity, like,
"Oh, my God, you're so cute"?
He better not even think about using the word cute.
Like that--that'll be it.
[all cheering] - What?
Yeah!
[Gem and the Deadheads' "Long Way Down"]
- How you feeling, Artem? - Artem, yes.
- You're not drunk, right? - Where is Nicole?
Where is she?
Nicole's getting it ready for all of us to have fun!
Ladies and gentlemen, please draw your attention
to center stage for tonight's performance.
[all cheering] - What?
I think I made it clear to JJ and Gleb
that we're gonna go classy,
and we did not want to have strippers.
♪ When the temperature drops too cold ♪
[all cheering]
♪ Don't let go, it's a long way down ♪
♪ And your back is against the wall ♪
♪ Don't look over and out, look down ♪
[driving rock music]
[all cheering]
♪ Love me when I'm gone
♪ Want you to carry on
Ow!
Yeah, you look good, girl. You look good.
Get him, Nicole.
Ow! Dang, mama!
I am so proud of Nicole for pulling this off
because it is so nerve-racking to not only be
in your lingerie in front of everyone,
but to do a really sexy dance for your fiancé
and we're all watching.
[upbeat music]
♪
Dang, Artem, cover your pants! Cover your pants!
Let's go, Nicole!
Yeah!
[screaming]
No!
What a terrible idea to have your brother
at your bachelorette party.
Nakedness and sexy stuff--
like, how weird are we?
We're so weird.
♪ I am even, I'm ready to fly ♪
Smack it! Whoo!
Very jaw-dropping because I did not expect that.
I mean, that lingerie, like, her body, her hair,
and she was looking with those hungry eyes.
It was a very nice view, not gonna lie.
[all cheering]
♪ My time, it's the right time, honey ♪
♪ Our time, it's the right time coming ♪
Do you guys need a moment?
Nicole, you killed it!
Ow! [all cheering]
Oh, my God, I am so happy I did this.
It was super empowering, actually.
Even if I didn't nail the routine,
I just wanted to be sexy for him.
And that sexy side just kind of took over and was like,
"----, let's just do it."
- Yes! - Boo!
[upbeat music]
♪
I'm gonna go put on my swimsuit.
I brought a bunch from three years ago.
This is your bachelorette.
Why didn't you buy a new bikini?
Because where were you to go buy it?
Oh, see, I-- [laughter]
- Oh, yes. - Oh, yeah.
Oh, Artem.
Oh, no! - Boom.
Yeah.
But I didn't, like, embarrass myself at all, right?
- No, you're good. - OK.
I think Artem really enjoyed himself yesterday.
Nikki outdid herself.
That's what it's about, right?
You seem like you've--
you've really welcomed Artem into the family.
I love Artem.
He's a good dude. He's good for my sister.
He's very, very caring.
That's--one of the main things in my life
is that he treats her right,
and I know he does, so that's what's cool.
Even, like, if---- went south ever, say, for them,
I'd still be his brother and be like,
"Yo, you ever need anything, I'm here, you know?"
Like, he's one of those guys for me now.
He's a boy, and once I have a-- once you're my boy,
you're------- in for life, that's it.
Is it bad I'm in my PJ's still?
They don't care, right?
Hello.
How are you guys doing?
Um, I could be better.
It's crazy, the older you get, it's just like you can't drink
like you did in your 20s.
And yesterday and last night, we had a lot of tequila.
But I gotta keep the party going.
So I thought it was really genius
that Nicole and I would get some hydration fluids in us
and kind of kick out this hangover
so, I guess, we can keep drinking.
[relaxed music]
♪
Was last night everything you thought it would be and more?
Oh, more and even better.
Yeah?
I mean, strip dance, what?
A pole dance?
Brie, so can we go over our checklist?
Could I just get an IV and, like, listen to the birds
and just relax?
Um, well you did say you were gonna
help me get a Paris venue, so could we work on that
while we're laying here?
This is what I'm thinking is, if you come to Paris with me
early, so like five days, maybe,
and we just put it all together.
So it's not our wedding, you and I.
It's you and Artem.
So I think maybe Artem can help you.
No, I understand that.
But what I was thinking--
She needs a female recommendation.
It's not the male recommendation.
Well, you're really good with me about it,
but I would rather have Artem be at home with Teo longer
so Teo doesn't have to be in Paris as long.
It just, to me, would be more stressful
if you guys were there because I'd want to entertain,
make sure you guys are taken care of,
and then I feel like nothing will get done.
When Brie's there, I could just bitch her
and boss her around and-- - See, that's what I'm saying.
- No, I'm just kidding. - That's what's gonna happen.
- [laughs] - That's what's gonna happen.
I'm joking!
You treat me like your TaskRabbit.
Oh, do I?
Oh, my gosh.
That's so funny.
Like, I think you forget I'm a mom and a wife.
I have two kids. Did you know that?
Oh, my gosh, yeah.
So as of right now, no.
Are you serious?
[tense music]
[soft music]
♪
Hello. both: Nattie!
- I just landed. - Oh, my gosh.
It's so good to see you, girl.
- Yay! - Oh, my gosh.
- Good to see you guys. - Oh, my gosh.
I'm so happy you're here.
Hi. Sorry I'm not fully clothed.
The house is gorgeous. - Ooh, I love that jacket.
Isn't this house amazing?
Thank you. I knew you would.
Oh, Nattie, last night I did a pole dance.
Oh, my God.
Did you show Nattie her bedroom too?
Wow.
Oh, I haven't showed her her bedroom.
She just walked in.
- OK, well, I mean-- - [laughs]
I need to get my suit on.
You want a bevy? - Yeah, let's go.
Face got all, like, morphed and, like--
that's when I'm drunk is when your eyes get all weird.
[light music]
For whatever reason, this is enormously gratifying.
- I know. - Right?
I have to say, I really feel like I've nailed
this bachelorette party, so--
I can't wait to see--
so has she picked out her dress?
Well, Nattie, there's--OK.
OK, so my sister...
- Is high maintenance. - You know that.
And they're getting married in Paris.
- You're kidding. - In two weeks.
- In Paris? - Yes.
Even though they're-- she keeps saying eloping,
which, it's not true.
She still has to find a wedding venue.
Like, she's still trying to figure out all the details.
She has nothing organized at all.
- No. - I would be flipping my----.
I know.
This is actually really out of character for her,
to be perfectly honest. - Mm-hmm. I agree.
Like, I couldn't imagine Nicole going into WrestleMania
and being like, "We'll just wing it
in front of 80,000 people."
This is basically what she's doing right now.
- Yeah. - She's winging it.
100%.
The one thing I love about having Nattie around
is that Nattie gets Nicole and I.
I mean, she has been
on the road with us for over a decade.
She's seen Nicole and I at our worst, at our best.
And she knows how different we are but how close we are.
So I always love picking her brain.
I can't even make this up.
She asked me today if I could leave in five days
to go early with her to help plan.
Artem wants to stay in Napa to be with Matteo.
What about Birdie and Buddy?
What about your life?
- OK, thank you. - And your husband.
- I'm married, yeah. - Yeah. And you have--
And just for me to pack up and go, and say,
"Au revoir, going to be gone for ten days,"
like, that's a lot. - You can't do that.
God, and also, she needs to understand, too,
that, like, Artem is going to be her husband.
Nicole is extremely independent.
She's not used to letting anyone take care of her.
Right.
She's always been the one to take the reins.
But, like, sometimes she just needs to let--
like, even if Artem can help out a little bit,
or even, like-- I think he just thought
that she was gonna do all of it.
She needs to kind of shift responsibilities a little bit
and just let Artem be the husband.
Right, she does.
And I feel like she has to kind of let go of me.
It's a lot of pressure on you.
What Nattie is saying, there's a lot of truth to it.
Because I think Nicole and I do get caught up
in our very close relationship,
where we act like husband and wife.
Nicole really needs to learn how to separate
and kind of start to rely on Artem.
Like, I can't be her Artem.
I just feel like she needs to start treating Artem
the way she kind of treats me.
And look, at the end of the day,
yes, I know I'm gonna go,
and I wanna go, and I wanna do all this.
But I just don't like that my sister assumes
that it's just so easy, and it just--
can just all happen without asking me.
I want her to know, like, she needs to ask me.
She needs to give me time.
So I just want her to suffer a little bit
for doing that to me.
So I know I should go. - Yeah.
I just have to talk to Bryan.
Jennie, my sister, is like this too.
It's like, they piss us off, but they really need us.
No, she really needs me, I know.
I mean, you can't let her down.
Like, you can't let Nicole down.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
I feel like I'm gonna have a lot of tequila today
and end up telling her, like, "All right, I'll go."
♪
[indistinct chatter]
♪
We're getting naked now.
[all cheering]
Can you just show us, how do you bob for a dildo?
Come on, get in there!
[all cheering]
Bobbing for dildos might be the most brilliant idea
to do at a bachelorette. - Amazing.
You have to do that all the time.
Look at the smile on his face, man.
I think I'm gonna bring that out
even for, like, the holidays.
Why not? After Thanksgiving dinner?
Actually, that's gonna be our ice breaker for every party.
[all cheering]
I honestly think that you always
need to do it joint because as women,
to watch men bob for dildos, is one of, like,
the best highlights of my life.
Well, I will say this:
the guys, I think, were better than the girls.
I know.
[all cheering]
Whoo!
[all cheering]
I don't know what kind of game is that.
♪
This is the Russian ballerina.
- The Russian ballerina. - [inaudible]
Where you been for the two days?
- She had training. - Oh, you were training?
Then you gotta go to the bar and get, like, a Stolichnaya.
- Da. Okay. - Exactly. [laughs]
Ooh, bootylicious!
I'll take it.
I worked hard for these booty gains.
So my brother called.
And even though there was a little hope
that they would be able to make it,
but they actually can't.
I had this vision in my mind what the wedding should be
and how it's gonna go, and...
[somber music]
It's extremely disappointing.
Because...
It's just not gonna happen.
My parents not able to come to Paris.
The only place that's closest to Paris
would be Turkey because they don't need
a visa to go to Turkey.
At this point right now, everybody from Nicole's side
already committed to the wedding in Paris.
And it would be impossible
to change everything for Turkey.
So my plan would be, take Matteo to Turkey
to meet my parents in person.
And Nicole would stay in Paris and continue
planning the wedding.
So I'm just gonna have to talk to Nicole
and see how she feels about that.
[upbeat music]
Look who came, Dad.
Yeah.
Love you, Dad.
Oh!
Oh, thank you, Dad. That's so sweet.
♪
You need to go. What time is it?
It's 4:25.
OK, yeah, you get in--
you get in your car.
Oh, I'm so jealous that you get to see Teo.
Yeah.
I wanna go home to Tay Tay.
I love you. - I love you too.
Oh, you got-- - I'm sorry.
[laughs]
Who were you talking to on the phone earlier, by the way?
Oh, I talked to my brother about,
obviously, my parents coming and stuff.
France is a definite no-go. - Your brother--oh.
- Yeah, it's-- - It's a no-go.
I was so excited. - Yeah.
I don't know why I had so much hope.
I was like, it's for sure gonna work.
He said that it's gonna take, like, 90 days minimum
if there is even a chance.
And it's like, even the chance is, like, very slim
that they'd even be able to get a visa, yeah.
It's so hard and frustrating with his family,
because it's like, all you want to do is,
like, put them on a flight and bring them here.
And we can't do that.
And it just hurts me because I can't fix it,
and I wanna fix it.
But that's the bad news.
The good news is, they still can travel to Turkey.
So I'm thinking, you know, getting them out to Turkey
and just maybe flying in then, you know,
so they can meet Matteo for the first time
and just hang out.
So Tay Tay goes to Turkey?
Without Mommy?
You can come. I never said you're not.
I just don't know what you need to do in Paris.
Yeah.
There's so much to do in Paris.
OK, can we just think about this?
I get a little bit of anxiety immediately
hearing Teo going to another country without me,
I'm not gonna lie.
I don't know anything about Turkey,
as far as I've only ever had a layover in Istanbul
on my way to Kyrgyzstan, so--
Yeah, remember we're talking about a civil country.
We're not talking about--
No, no, no, I know, but it's just ever--
I never imagined my son in another country without me.
I mean, how far is Turkey from Paris to fly to?
Oh, like three, four hours maybe, tops,
three and a half, four.
I wish it was closer. OK.
Do they do nonstops wherever you have to go?
I mean, I haven't checked, so we're
gonna have to figure it out. - All right.
I'm just saying it's an option that they can go there.
Yeah, no, that's great.
Because they can't go anywhere else.
I'm just a little buzzed, and I'm seeing them
hanging a penis in the background.
So I'm like, let's take a little second.
[laughs] - OK.
But I'm happy that no matter what,
you're gonna see them. - Yeah.
So that's a good sign, you know.
I need you to understand just how
I'm hesitant until we talk about things with Teo,
just being his mom.
I love you. You go get in the car.
There's just so many things going on in my head.
Like, to think of my son in another country,
potentially without me, like, scares the---- out of me.
Immediately in my head, I'm like, hell no.
Like, absolutely not.
Will you let me know how baby boy is
and make sure to FaceTime me every morning?
Yeah, of course.
I'll do that.
- I love you. - I love you too.
Have fun. - OK.
At the same time, it, like, breaks my heart,
the fact that Matteo's never met his grandparents.
I know what my grandparents mean and meant to me.
And so I don't want to ever look back and have regret
that I didn't let Matteo meet his grandparents,
that Artem didn't get that moment to have
for the rest of his life.
- Have fun. - I love you. Thank you.
Call me when you get to the airport.
Yeah, I will.
[somber music]
You know, there are things in life
you're gonna learn as a parent that you can't control.
And all you can do is pray.
And so now, all I can do is pray.
I love you, monkey!
Bonjour. - Ooh!
You're giving me a 1920s Paris vibe.
Try to find a venue, give it a chance.
Oh,----!
We really know how to pick the spots, don't we?
I know.
To have Matteo go to Turkey with Artem,
I'm just so nervous.
Artem freaked out at me.
It was, like, kind of crazy.
I'm kind of worried about you guys.
If that's how it's gonna be forever,
that's really, like, a big deal.
This is how I live life.
I'm not gonna sit here and not voice my opinion.