1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:48,673 Right? 4 00:00:48,673 --> 00:00:49,507 OK. Settle down. 5 00:00:49,507 --> 00:00:51,551 Britney, it's your turn. 6 00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:52,761 Truth or dare? 7 00:00:52,969 --> 00:00:53,887 Truth. 8 00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:56,264 Who would you rather fuck? 9 00:00:56,264 --> 00:00:57,432 David Beckham... 10 00:00:57,432 --> 00:00:59,392 Tom Brady 11 00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:00,268 Or Chris Long? 12 00:01:00,268 --> 00:01:02,312 Duh, Chris Long. 13 00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,732 And look at this crowd, Dick. 14 00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:07,650 The feeling here is electric. 15 00:01:07,650 --> 00:01:10,695 All in anticipation for this epic showdown between 16 00:01:10,695 --> 00:01:13,782 L.A. Tech and Rock Fall's Pioneers. 17 00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:17,744 But the big story here is the heroic play of senior phenom Chris Long. 18 00:01:17,827 --> 00:01:19,871 He has literally put this team on his back 19 00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:21,873 and carried them into their first Final Four. 20 00:01:21,873 --> 00:01:24,876 Appearance in 23 years. How about that? 21 00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:27,545 Would you listen to this crowd, Bob. 22 00:01:27,545 --> 00:01:29,672 They love this kid. 23 00:01:31,966 --> 00:01:34,052 Long steals the inbound pass, penetrates 24 00:01:34,052 --> 00:01:36,012 the middle, spins passed Hayes dropping into the paint and... 25 00:01:37,013 --> 00:01:39,516 OK. Kim is a fucking cunt. 26 00:01:39,974 --> 00:01:42,435 That's right, Dick, Chris Long has had four. 27 00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:43,269 Count em'. 28 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:45,271 Four consecutive triple doubles. 29 00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:47,398 He shows no sign of stopping. 30 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:49,609 Chris, deserves so much better than Kim. 31 00:01:49,609 --> 00:01:50,735 I mean, like, what? 32 00:01:50,985 --> 00:01:52,403 OK, truth or dare? 33 00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:55,281 He will easily go top five in the draft this year. 34 00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:56,741 How about the top pick? 35 00:01:56,741 --> 00:01:58,451 How do you spell MVP? 36 00:01:58,451 --> 00:01:59,911 Chris Long. 37 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:01,162 Watch out, NBA. 38 00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:02,872 Here comes Long. 39 00:02:03,248 --> 00:02:04,707 I dare you... 40 00:02:04,707 --> 00:02:06,501 To make out with Stacy. 41 00:02:07,252 --> 00:02:09,671 That's not fair, you guys. 42 00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:11,589 Just pretend she's Chris. 43 00:02:11,923 --> 00:02:12,465 Chris! 44 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:13,091 Chris! 45 00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:13,716 Chris! 46 00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:14,384 Chris! 47 00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:15,051 Chris! 48 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:15,677 Chris! 49 00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:16,302 Chris! 50 00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:16,970 Chris! 51 00:02:17,053 --> 00:02:17,554 Chris! 52 00:02:17,595 --> 00:02:18,054 Chris! 53 00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,013 Chris! 54 00:02:19,097 --> 00:02:19,597 Chris! 55 00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:20,265 Chris! 56 00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:20,849 Chris! 57 00:02:20,890 --> 00:02:21,266 Chris! Chris! Chris! Chris! 58 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,851 Oh my God! Can you believe this?!? 59 00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:27,105 Ew, what are you sluts doing? 60 00:02:28,064 --> 00:02:29,023 What do you want, Javi? 61 00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:31,276 Shhh, turn off the music... 62 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:34,028 Ohhh, it's Chris! 63 00:02:34,028 --> 00:02:37,282 Oh, no Dick, it looks like it's his knee this could be serious. 64 00:02:37,365 --> 00:02:39,701 Ohhh, this hurts just to look at. 65 00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:55,967 I've been having nightmares 66 00:02:55,967 --> 00:02:58,761 like that since my accident, but I'm no Debbie Downer. 67 00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,638 I got right back to work. 68 00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:02,932 Seven thousand and eight, seven thousand and nine. 69 00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:04,767 Easy, Chris, don't put too much pressure on it. 70 00:03:04,767 --> 00:03:05,810 Can we be positive? 71 00:03:05,810 --> 00:03:08,104 Will Smith, in the Pursuit Of Happyness was positive. 72 00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:10,607 He got the job at the end. I'm going to the NBA. 73 00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:11,774 I got 50 more. 74 00:03:14,235 --> 00:03:16,571 And, yes, I had a Mohawk. 75 00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:17,906 I'm not proud of it. 76 00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:20,033 And speaking of the pursuit of happiness, 77 00:03:20,074 --> 00:03:23,411 no matter what happens, I have Kim by my side. 78 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:26,331 This is a painting I did of us in my cartooning class. 79 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:30,126 I think next I want to learn animation. Oh, and oil paints. 80 00:03:31,085 --> 00:03:32,837 Kim says I should write out my name. 81 00:03:32,837 --> 00:03:34,964 But I kind of like it when it's just the C and the L. 82 00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,926 To be honest, I kind of love art even 83 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:40,345 more than basketball. 84 00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:44,515 But as Kim always says, 85 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:47,227 you can't make money with art. 86 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:52,565 Happy anniversary. 87 00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:00,490 If you looked up 88 00:04:00,490 --> 00:04:03,201 Bozo in the dictionary, you might see this image. 89 00:04:03,534 --> 00:04:05,286 God, I hate that Mohawk. 90 00:04:05,286 --> 00:04:08,206 What's with the suitcase? 91 00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:10,250 Don't be so emotional, Chris. 92 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,376 Was I being emotional? 93 00:04:11,376 --> 00:04:12,961 I don't think I was being emotional. 94 00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:15,338 I think there was normal emotion. 95 00:04:15,338 --> 00:04:16,965 I don't have time for this. 96 00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:19,175 Daddy's waiting everything's in the note. 97 00:04:19,175 --> 00:04:20,760 What? Whoa, whoa, slow down. 98 00:04:21,636 --> 00:04:22,595 Kim. Kimmy. 99 00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:25,848 What a-- Where are you going? 100 00:04:25,848 --> 00:04:28,351 And this is when Kim told me how she really felt. 101 00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,688 You're an art major. 102 00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:34,816 I know. 103 00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:41,197 I thought you loved my paintings. 104 00:04:41,781 --> 00:04:43,366 Kim not you, too. 105 00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:47,328 Kim, you can't listen to what coaches and doctors and physical therapists 106 00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:48,997 and everyone else at this school says. 107 00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:50,748 I'm getting drafted. 108 00:04:50,748 --> 00:04:51,958 You're delusional. 109 00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:53,876 Wake up. 110 00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:56,337 Kim. Kim. 111 00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:00,341 Kim. 112 00:05:00,466 --> 00:05:02,552 Man, that mohawk looks stupid. 113 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:05,305 People will tell you to follow your dreams 114 00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:06,889 until you fall short. 115 00:05:07,765 --> 00:05:11,144 Then they'll call you delusional. 116 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:26,451 But sometimes when you hit rock bottom, certain people 117 00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:29,746 come into your life that you would least expect and change it 118 00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:30,997 forever. 119 00:05:52,810 --> 00:05:54,854 The year was 2012. 120 00:05:54,979 --> 00:05:58,066 The year in which I was supposed to be competing for NBA 121 00:05:58,066 --> 00:05:59,275 Rookie of the Year. 122 00:05:59,275 --> 00:06:04,364 But instead, I was working at a small, sweaty gym making minimum wage 123 00:06:05,907 --> 00:06:08,201 And for the record, I did graduate. 124 00:06:08,326 --> 00:06:09,535 And that's when it hit me. 125 00:06:09,535 --> 00:06:12,080 What the hell am I going to do for a living? 126 00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:14,290 I was offered a lot of jobs in the sports world. 127 00:06:14,415 --> 00:06:16,751 But to be honest, I just haven't wanted to face it. 128 00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:20,380 Sweat hard. A gym. 129 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:21,422 You shouldn't work out at. 130 00:06:21,422 --> 00:06:24,550 Sweat Hard, a gym where no one sweats hard. 131 00:06:25,259 --> 00:06:27,762 Located deep in the valley, away 132 00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:30,973 from the glitz and glamor of Hollywood. 133 00:06:30,973 --> 00:06:33,309 People keep telling me I need therapy. 134 00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:35,436 Especially my coworker Missy. 135 00:06:35,436 --> 00:06:38,106 Missy tells me I need therapy every day. 136 00:06:39,982 --> 00:06:42,068 Todd, the gym owner's son, 137 00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:45,696 the "manager" of this place, was in pottery class with me. 138 00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:48,116 Guy couldn't make a vase to save his life. 139 00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:49,325 But he offered me a job here. 140 00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:56,916 In addition to working in this gym, my full time 141 00:06:56,916 --> 00:06:59,043 job is trying to not be bitter. 142 00:07:23,025 --> 00:07:24,610 Don't be so emotional, Chris. 143 00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:26,571 Emotional Chris. 144 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:28,239 You're an art major. 145 00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,991 Art major. 146 00:07:30,700 --> 00:07:31,826 You're delusional. 147 00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:32,702 Wake up. 148 00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:35,288 You're delusional. 149 00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,874 Wake up. 150 00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:43,463 Excuse me. 151 00:07:44,088 --> 00:07:46,382 There are so many membership packages. 152 00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:50,052 I'm like, totally not sure what I want. 153 00:07:50,261 --> 00:07:51,554 Oh, my God. 154 00:07:51,554 --> 00:07:53,931 You look so familiar. 155 00:07:53,931 --> 00:07:55,933 Do we know each other? 156 00:07:55,933 --> 00:07:58,436 Oh, my God. 157 00:07:58,436 --> 00:07:59,896 No, wait! 158 00:07:59,896 --> 00:08:02,773 You played for LA Tech, didn't you? 159 00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:04,233 O.M.G. 160 00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:07,320 You're that basketball guy, right? 161 00:08:07,695 --> 00:08:09,530 Can I help you ladies? 162 00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:12,366 Um, you work here now? 163 00:08:16,871 --> 00:08:19,040 I like, totally do. 164 00:08:19,081 --> 00:08:20,374 Oh, my God. Right. 165 00:08:20,374 --> 00:08:23,503 Like, isn't that, like, totally, like, crazy? 166 00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:27,507 Are you mocking us? 167 00:08:27,757 --> 00:08:28,758 Yeah. 168 00:08:30,343 --> 00:08:32,678 Do you want a membership or what? 169 00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:35,139 Thank you. Come again. 170 00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,849 No, no, no-- Excuse me? Young ladies. Excuse me. 171 00:08:36,849 --> 00:08:37,475 Hi. I'm Missy. Hi, ladies, excuse me, hi, nice to meet you-- 172 00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:42,939 Holy beJesus, Chris? 173 00:08:43,022 --> 00:08:45,191 You really-- You really gave it to him, huh? 174 00:08:46,567 --> 00:08:47,902 Bitches. Right? 175 00:08:47,902 --> 00:08:50,196 Are you gonna let him speak to our customers like that? 176 00:08:50,738 --> 00:08:52,949 What? They didn't-- They didn't buy anything. 177 00:08:52,990 --> 00:08:55,660 Did they buy-- They didn't buy anything, did they? OK. 178 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:04,544 OK. So I might not have the best customer service, 179 00:09:04,752 --> 00:09:06,462 but can you blame me? 180 00:09:06,462 --> 00:09:10,758 This scantily dressed human is another co-worker of mine. 181 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:11,717 Sup, dick spit. 182 00:09:11,717 --> 00:09:12,885 Bobby. 183 00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:14,178 See the numbers on my YouTube video? 184 00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:16,472 I'm up to a 104 views. 185 00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:19,100 Bout to make that sneezing panda my bitch. 186 00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:20,851 Bro, you're getting the floor all wet. 187 00:09:20,851 --> 00:09:22,478 You're getting the kitchen all ugly. 188 00:09:22,478 --> 00:09:23,688 Hey, Chris. 189 00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:24,939 Don't you dare talk to her. 190 00:09:25,189 --> 00:09:27,358 I'm not even talking to you. 191 00:09:27,817 --> 00:09:28,985 You getting smart with me? 192 00:09:28,985 --> 00:09:30,486 Huh, you tall fuck. 193 00:09:30,486 --> 00:09:32,446 I'm an orange belt. I will ruin you. 194 00:09:32,446 --> 00:09:33,281 Are we done? 195 00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:35,283 I'm never done, Chris. I got twenty more laps. 196 00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:36,659 And an hour more worth of legs. 197 00:09:36,659 --> 00:09:39,078 And I'm not going to stop till I feel like I'm back in college 198 00:09:39,203 --> 00:09:41,330 and there's a fucking party in the quad. 199 00:09:44,709 --> 00:09:47,920 God, I love Mondays! 200 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:48,921 That's Gizell. 201 00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:51,882 I'm pretty sure she hooks up with everyone. 202 00:09:51,882 --> 00:09:54,218 Kind of want a popsicle now, too. 203 00:10:00,182 --> 00:10:02,893 What you're looking at are the gym's pipes, 204 00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:05,563 flooding our neighbor, Ivana's salon 205 00:10:07,064 --> 00:10:09,191 with sewage. 206 00:10:09,191 --> 00:10:12,945 Meanwhile, at our morning meeting, our staff gets along swimmingly. 207 00:10:12,945 --> 00:10:13,571 No one is hiring. 208 00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:15,531 And I know because I've tried to find extra work. 209 00:10:15,573 --> 00:10:17,950 Okay. Calm down. We're not going to have to close down. 210 00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:19,035 I don't think. 211 00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:23,456 You stinky pigs do realize you have a business unattended outside? 212 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:24,915 Anybody care? 213 00:10:24,915 --> 00:10:26,375 Okay-- 214 00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:29,295 This is Ivana. 215 00:10:29,503 --> 00:10:31,255 She definitely abuses Adderall. 216 00:10:31,255 --> 00:10:34,842 And your gross sewage pipes are leaking stank into my salon. 217 00:10:35,509 --> 00:10:37,887 It's no wonder the pipes are leaking. 218 00:10:37,887 --> 00:10:39,347 I told you the week before that. 219 00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:42,516 Everything in this gym is broken, including the staff. 220 00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:47,063 Yes. Oh, this is cute. 221 00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:48,564 Oh, really? This is mature guys. 222 00:10:48,564 --> 00:10:51,275 What is this? West Side Story? Did you rehearse this? Very good. 223 00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:52,068 All right. 224 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:56,072 If you put this much effort into your gym maybe it wouldn't suck so fucking bad. 225 00:10:56,572 --> 00:10:58,282 Smell that, it's much better. 226 00:10:59,033 --> 00:11:01,869 I think her hair is pretty. 227 00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:07,500 Honestly, I'm at my breaking point. 228 00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,710 Asking myself every day. 229 00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:13,005 Do I believe in second chances? 230 00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:16,717 And yes, I also have a sweating problem. 231 00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:20,012 Doctors say it's tied to my anxiety, 232 00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:23,766 but I definitely don't need therapy. 233 00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:29,730 Hello, Chris, 234 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:32,942 you look a little bit down. 235 00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:35,861 Maybe I can cheer you up a little bit of a tap dance. 236 00:11:37,321 --> 00:11:38,906 This is Dre. 237 00:11:38,906 --> 00:11:40,783 Missy's husband. 238 00:11:40,950 --> 00:11:43,703 Can bench press the building. 239 00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:53,587 What are you doing? 240 00:11:57,591 --> 00:11:59,635 I have an audition as a British tap dancer. 241 00:12:02,096 --> 00:12:03,013 How'd I do? 242 00:12:03,013 --> 00:12:05,266 And yet he's the one in the healthy relationship. 243 00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:08,561 Paycheck time, huh? 244 00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:12,398 What are you guys talking about? 245 00:12:12,398 --> 00:12:13,441 Sports? 246 00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:16,485 You know, 247 00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:20,072 I've been hit with a few dodge balls back in my time, ya know? 248 00:12:20,072 --> 00:12:22,575 We should get a hoop out back, huh? 249 00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:24,535 Play a little B-ball. 250 00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:26,704 I don't play basketball anymore, Todd. 251 00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:27,747 What? 252 00:12:28,706 --> 00:12:30,499 This guy. What? 253 00:12:30,499 --> 00:12:32,793 Are you kidding? Why not? 254 00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:35,337 You were the best man I used to hear about you all the time. 255 00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:37,548 Chris Long scores thirty! 256 00:12:37,548 --> 00:12:39,049 Chris Long's unstoppable! 257 00:12:39,049 --> 00:12:41,135 My Dad thought you were the greatest. 258 00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:46,682 He got real excited when I told him we were on the same team now. 259 00:12:47,475 --> 00:12:48,642 Let's imagine 260 00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:53,230 that this ticket right here represents all of my hopes and dreams. 261 00:12:53,647 --> 00:12:56,984 Or better yet, my ACL, Okay? 262 00:13:00,196 --> 00:13:01,363 Whoops! 263 00:13:01,363 --> 00:13:02,782 There go those. 264 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,784 Hope you didn't need them, Chris. 265 00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:06,786 This is not my life. 266 00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,455 This is someone else's life. 267 00:13:11,373 --> 00:13:12,625 Pardon me. 268 00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:19,423 Jack Guy. 269 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:21,801 And that was the moment 270 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:25,095 I met the one and only Jack Guy. 271 00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:27,765 He immediately put us all on edge. 272 00:13:28,140 --> 00:13:29,767 But not to be a total hater. 273 00:13:29,767 --> 00:13:32,394 His cologne was kind of amazing. 274 00:13:32,394 --> 00:13:33,312 Jack Guy? 275 00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:36,190 Is that even a real name? 276 00:13:36,398 --> 00:13:37,316 Don't be jealous of his awesome name. 277 00:13:37,775 --> 00:13:39,985 Todd said not all of us are gonna get fired. 278 00:13:39,985 --> 00:13:41,654 As in some of us are getting fired? 279 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:44,406 Big changes are coming, Todd, it's gonna be awesome. 280 00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:46,867 Oh, can you change the lock on that door for me? 281 00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:49,078 I'm headed to Starbucks for a green tea latte I'll be back in twenty-ish. 282 00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:51,372 Schmidty! 283 00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:53,415 What the hell's going on, bro? 284 00:13:53,415 --> 00:13:54,583 Let's hit that club tonight, yeah! 285 00:14:01,215 --> 00:14:02,216 Todd. 286 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:05,678 What's up? 287 00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:07,513 You tell us, motherfucker. 288 00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:09,974 We have a new owner. What about your dad? 289 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,518 He said he was tired of 290 00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,478 losing money on a business just to keep me employed, 291 00:14:14,478 --> 00:14:16,814 and he wishes he would've strapped up 30 years ago. 292 00:14:18,816 --> 00:14:19,984 I suck. 293 00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:20,234 Do you know 294 00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:23,612 he currently holds the title World's First Ever Male Supermodel. 295 00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:24,947 I held that title once. 296 00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:26,949 This is Buzz. 297 00:14:26,949 --> 00:14:28,701 He's like an unofficial employee. 298 00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:30,369 He's here all day, every day. 299 00:14:30,369 --> 00:14:31,912 Guy's like 91. 300 00:14:31,912 --> 00:14:33,122 That's a title? 301 00:14:33,497 --> 00:14:36,166 Well then if he's so successful, what the fuck is he doing here? 302 00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:47,261 He's dated Kate Beckinsale, 303 00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:50,556 Cameron Diaz, and he's currently married to Adriana Lima. 304 00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:54,184 The Victoria's Secret supermodel? 305 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:55,895 She asked me to marry her, once. 306 00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:01,984 I bet ya even his dick has a six pack. 307 00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:03,652 Not anymore. 308 00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:04,737 I bet you $10. 309 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:06,864 He has a couch made of nothing but chinchilla fur 310 00:15:06,864 --> 00:15:09,575 and he gets out of the pool wet, and he sits on it. 311 00:15:10,117 --> 00:15:12,328 Just because he doesn't give a fuck. 312 00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,419 Oh and he was an all Ivy League quarterback for Yale. 313 00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:24,423 Record breaker, senior year, 28 touchdowns in 1 game. 314 00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:27,301 Sounds like my resume. 315 00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:29,887 How do you know all this? 316 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,389 I Google, Facebook, MySpace, Wikipedia, and Twittered him. 317 00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:33,641 Plus, he told me. 318 00:15:35,142 --> 00:15:36,810 Holy Sherlock. 319 00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:38,479 Check her out, Holmes. 320 00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:43,359 And this was someone 321 00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:45,778 who is not usually around here. 322 00:15:47,821 --> 00:15:48,614 Whoa. 323 00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:51,533 She looked like an angel. 324 00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:52,701 Who was she? 325 00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,203 Where did she come from? 326 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,871 Maybe she's looking for a trainer? 327 00:15:55,871 --> 00:15:57,456 Maybe I could be that trainer? 328 00:15:57,456 --> 00:15:59,249 Maybe we could train together? 329 00:15:59,249 --> 00:16:02,503 Maybe this is the beginning of something spec-- 330 00:16:02,503 --> 00:16:05,839 Of course. 331 00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:09,885 Mr. Guy's got some moves. 332 00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:12,513 Bet I can tell you exactly what he's saying. 333 00:16:12,513 --> 00:16:13,597 Hi, I'm Jack. 334 00:16:13,597 --> 00:16:14,264 Jack Guy. 335 00:16:14,264 --> 00:16:16,976 I'm a supermodel, and I throw footballs incredibly far. 336 00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:17,601 I'm married, 337 00:16:17,601 --> 00:16:19,061 but I'd still like to bend you over the hood 338 00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:21,605 of my incredibly expensive midlife crisis sports car. 339 00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:24,984 Oh, my God. Your name is Jack Guy. 340 00:16:25,025 --> 00:16:26,610 That is so cool. 341 00:16:26,610 --> 00:16:28,737 And your wallet is so big. 342 00:16:28,737 --> 00:16:32,241 If you treat me like shit, I promise I will love you forever. 343 00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:36,286 Missy's right, dude. 344 00:16:36,286 --> 00:16:38,163 You need therapy. 345 00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:41,166 Bro, you wear a Speedo. 346 00:16:41,583 --> 00:16:43,127 Did you guys hear the good news? 347 00:16:43,127 --> 00:16:46,005 We're gonna be on TV. 348 00:16:46,505 --> 00:16:48,674 I'm gonna be famous! 349 00:16:49,299 --> 00:16:52,094 Yes. I've been training for this my whole life. 350 00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:56,140 It'll be just like the iconic hit TV show The Office. 351 00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:59,476 But unscripted and set in a gym. 352 00:16:59,768 --> 00:17:00,602 It'll be great! 353 00:17:00,602 --> 00:17:02,813 We'll have competitions, ya know, awards. 354 00:17:04,481 --> 00:17:05,816 So those are the basics of the reality 355 00:17:05,816 --> 00:17:06,483 show. 356 00:17:10,946 --> 00:17:12,489 The less you know the better. 357 00:17:12,489 --> 00:17:15,200 So let me be clear on one thing. 358 00:17:15,993 --> 00:17:17,828 There will be no favorites. 359 00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,705 We are a team. 360 00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:23,876 Everybody is going to get plenty of screen time. 361 00:17:29,256 --> 00:17:32,384 And I like the world to get to know each and every one of you 362 00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:35,262 because I sense greatness in this room. 363 00:17:36,138 --> 00:17:37,181 And speaking of the cast, 364 00:17:38,474 --> 00:17:38,724 I thought 365 00:17:38,724 --> 00:17:41,769 we needed a little bit more of a Zen aspect in this place. 366 00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:45,189 So I'd like you to meet your new yoga instructor. 367 00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:45,981 Namaste. 368 00:17:45,981 --> 00:17:49,026 My humans, my earth name is Nyles. 369 00:17:49,985 --> 00:17:53,155 My cosmic name is Baba Guru Yogi 370 00:17:55,115 --> 00:17:57,242 G. Which you may call me once we attain enlightenment 371 00:17:57,534 --> 00:17:58,786 in our practice together. 372 00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:00,537 If this guy thinks I'm calling him 373 00:18:00,537 --> 00:18:03,707 Baba Guru Yogi, G, he's got another thing coming to him. 374 00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:06,460 Namaste. Yeah. Namaste. That's great. 375 00:18:06,710 --> 00:18:07,878 I have a question. 376 00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:10,380 What if we don't want our lives on display? 377 00:18:27,564 --> 00:18:29,775 Everybody wants the limelight. 378 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:32,402 And the best part about this, this is only the beginning 379 00:18:32,486 --> 00:18:33,737 of the Dumbbells experience. 380 00:18:33,737 --> 00:18:35,405 Dumbbells? 381 00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:38,534 That's our new name. 382 00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:39,743 Dumbbells. 383 00:18:39,743 --> 00:18:41,036 25/8. 384 00:18:41,036 --> 00:18:42,287 25/8? 385 00:18:42,287 --> 00:18:43,372 Exactly. 386 00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:45,916 Because 24/7's for pussies. 387 00:18:45,916 --> 00:18:48,043 We're Dumbbells all the time. 388 00:18:49,336 --> 00:18:50,295 Speak for yourself. 389 00:18:53,757 --> 00:18:55,968 So does that mean we get extra hours? 390 00:18:56,593 --> 00:18:57,219 Negativo. 391 00:18:57,219 --> 00:18:59,179 Operating hours remain the same. 392 00:18:59,179 --> 00:19:01,515 So then how can we be called 25/8? 393 00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:03,725 Perception 394 00:19:04,476 --> 00:19:05,894 is reality. 395 00:19:06,770 --> 00:19:08,438 Dumbbells 25/8? 396 00:19:08,438 --> 00:19:10,482 But we're still open from 6 to 9? 397 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:14,653 In today's economy, reality shows have been proven to be a very valuable 398 00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:18,490 mechanism to boost business profits by as much as 300%. 399 00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:20,325 And speaking of percentages, 400 00:19:20,325 --> 00:19:22,619 I need everybody to give that little bit extra. 401 00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:25,956 So if you've been at a 100? 402 00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:27,916 I need you at 150. 403 00:19:27,916 --> 00:19:30,252 And if you been at 10% 404 00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:32,588 I suggest a complete 405 00:19:32,588 --> 00:19:34,381 attitude adjustment. 406 00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:39,094 Fuck this guy. 407 00:19:39,094 --> 00:19:40,762 Fuck this guy. 408 00:19:41,346 --> 00:19:43,473 500%. I'm done. 409 00:19:43,473 --> 00:19:46,143 I thought about going pro, but I had so many modeling offers, 410 00:19:46,143 --> 00:19:48,228 I figured, you know, why risk an injury? 411 00:19:48,228 --> 00:19:49,062 Yeah. 412 00:19:49,062 --> 00:19:50,898 On someone else's dime. 413 00:19:50,898 --> 00:19:53,192 Whole education, ya know, it’s great I love-- 414 00:19:57,070 --> 00:19:57,571 Cliff. 415 00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:58,697 Can I help you? 416 00:19:58,822 --> 00:20:01,491 Actually, it's Chris. 417 00:20:01,491 --> 00:20:03,911 He's a good looking, huh? 418 00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:08,165 Too bad. 419 00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:08,415 He's. 420 00:20:08,415 --> 00:20:10,500 He's also married. 421 00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:15,130 I know. Hi. 422 00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:19,092 I'm Jack's niece, Rachel. 423 00:20:23,138 --> 00:20:23,847 Chris. 424 00:20:24,598 --> 00:20:25,182 My office. 425 00:20:25,182 --> 00:20:27,226 10 minutes sharp. 426 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:42,074 Jack? 427 00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:43,325 Yes. 428 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:44,826 You wanted to see me? 429 00:20:44,826 --> 00:20:45,577 Yeah. 430 00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:47,329 We need to talk. 431 00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:53,710 I can come back. 432 00:20:53,710 --> 00:20:54,419 No, no. 433 00:20:54,419 --> 00:20:55,295 Right now. 434 00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:02,135 I have two troubling words for you. 435 00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:05,222 Jack. 436 00:21:05,222 --> 00:21:07,015 Cockblock. 437 00:21:09,142 --> 00:21:10,686 So you were hitting on your niece? 438 00:21:10,686 --> 00:21:13,063 It's a metaphor. 439 00:21:13,063 --> 00:21:18,110 This show is like my fat cock. 440 00:21:19,027 --> 00:21:21,405 And nobody is going to block it. 441 00:21:23,407 --> 00:21:25,367 I just want to say bye. 442 00:21:25,367 --> 00:21:25,826 Rache', hi. 443 00:21:26,952 --> 00:21:27,911 6 a.m.? 444 00:21:27,911 --> 00:21:28,662 6 a.m. 445 00:21:28,662 --> 00:21:29,705 sharp. 446 00:21:31,498 --> 00:21:33,250 Wow. Cool fish. 447 00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:34,334 You like it? 448 00:21:35,335 --> 00:21:36,044 Yeah. 449 00:21:36,044 --> 00:21:37,004 Well, it's yours. 450 00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:37,796 Take it. 451 00:21:37,796 --> 00:21:38,672 What? Really? 452 00:21:38,672 --> 00:21:39,840 Yes. It was Todd's. 453 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,383 I'm sure he's going to throw it away. 454 00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:43,302 Let's find the fish at home. 455 00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:45,804 Consider it to be my gift to you for helping out with the show. 456 00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:47,389 Thank you. 457 00:21:47,389 --> 00:21:48,307 You're welcome. 458 00:21:48,432 --> 00:21:49,308 Wow. Cool. 459 00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:50,934 I'll see you bright and early, okay? 460 00:21:50,934 --> 00:21:51,310 Yeah. 461 00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:51,852 All right. 462 00:21:55,647 --> 00:21:56,481 Let me just make it 463 00:21:56,481 --> 00:21:59,192 really, really simple for you. 464 00:21:59,526 --> 00:22:01,987 Either you're a cockblock 465 00:22:02,112 --> 00:22:03,613 or a Dumbbell. 466 00:22:04,364 --> 00:22:05,949 You need to choose. 467 00:22:19,212 --> 00:22:21,089 Honey, I'm home. 468 00:22:21,673 --> 00:22:23,258 There's my MVP. 469 00:22:23,258 --> 00:22:26,261 I made your favorite. 470 00:22:26,261 --> 00:22:27,012 Wow. 471 00:22:27,262 --> 00:22:30,182 Everything looks absolutely wonderful, dear. 472 00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:33,602 Nice buzzer beating dunk over Dwight Howard tonight. 473 00:22:33,852 --> 00:22:36,688 Oh, you'd think he would have learned from last time. 474 00:22:41,318 --> 00:22:42,277 I set the table, 475 00:22:42,277 --> 00:22:45,989 but what do you say we start with dessert first? 476 00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:48,408 This is not my life. 477 00:22:48,825 --> 00:22:51,036 This is someone else's life. 478 00:23:02,172 --> 00:23:03,548 Chris, my man. 479 00:23:03,548 --> 00:23:04,841 What is up? 480 00:23:04,841 --> 00:23:06,968 You're a nice guy. I wanted to tell you this in person. 481 00:23:07,177 --> 00:23:07,928 All right. 482 00:23:08,136 --> 00:23:09,221 Look, you're evicted, man. 483 00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:10,722 You can't live here anymore. 484 00:23:10,722 --> 00:23:11,515 What? 485 00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:13,225 Yeah, you're getting evicted. 486 00:23:13,350 --> 00:23:14,935 You can't live here anymore. 487 00:23:14,935 --> 00:23:17,896 It's just horrible, terrible stuff going on. 488 00:23:17,896 --> 00:23:19,731 Your car's being towed downstairs right now, too. 489 00:23:19,731 --> 00:23:21,817 I don't know if you wanted me to tell you. 490 00:23:22,150 --> 00:23:22,943 Awesome. 491 00:23:22,943 --> 00:23:24,861 Hey wait a sec, you uh-- You been working out? 492 00:23:24,861 --> 00:23:27,030 You look nice, man. Real good. Incline? 493 00:23:30,158 --> 00:23:31,868 I'll, I'll-- I'll come back. 494 00:23:31,868 --> 00:23:32,119 All right. 495 00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:32,577 Talk to you later. 496 00:23:32,577 --> 00:23:36,706 Uhhh-- That was my boss on the phone, and he saw you coming in. 497 00:23:36,706 --> 00:23:37,624 And good news 498 00:23:37,624 --> 00:23:40,502 he actually thinks you look like a professional basketball player. 499 00:23:40,877 --> 00:23:41,920 Isn't that great? 500 00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:43,505 Does that mean I get the loan? 501 00:23:43,505 --> 00:23:46,133 What? No. God, no. Not even. 502 00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:47,092 Were you serious about that? 503 00:23:47,092 --> 00:23:49,469 No. You have no assets to speak of. 504 00:23:49,511 --> 00:23:53,265 Besides the size of your balls for even asking for that amount of money. 505 00:23:53,265 --> 00:23:55,851 But look. OK, I understand. 506 00:23:56,351 --> 00:23:57,436 All right. You're desperate. 507 00:23:57,436 --> 00:23:58,812 Right? Everything's falling apart. 508 00:23:58,812 --> 00:24:01,356 If I can offer you some advice. 509 00:24:01,356 --> 00:24:04,359 Get the fuck out of my office. 510 00:24:05,152 --> 00:24:07,988 Being on a reality show was not at the top of my list. 511 00:24:08,363 --> 00:24:11,116 The last thing I wanted to do was share my reality with anyone. 512 00:24:11,116 --> 00:24:13,452 But, Jack Guy was paying $1000 up front, 513 00:24:13,702 --> 00:24:15,704 and that bought me more time with my landlord. 514 00:24:28,758 --> 00:24:29,759 I'm an idiot. 515 00:24:30,010 --> 00:24:31,178 Yo Mookie, you owe 516 00:24:31,178 --> 00:24:31,928 ketchup, dude. 517 00:24:31,928 --> 00:24:33,847 A full bottle of ketchup. 518 00:24:33,847 --> 00:24:35,348 Hey, Nyles, Nyles-- 519 00:24:41,229 --> 00:24:42,522 Hey. 520 00:24:42,522 --> 00:24:45,775 Good morning, Dumbbell. Check out the new uni's. 521 00:24:46,067 --> 00:24:47,110 Not bad, huh? 522 00:24:47,944 --> 00:24:48,778 You're 3 minutes late, 523 00:24:48,778 --> 00:24:51,448 you get the sleeves. 524 00:24:51,448 --> 00:24:52,616 So, what do you think? 525 00:24:53,575 --> 00:24:55,702 You don't waste any time. 526 00:24:55,702 --> 00:24:56,453 Yeah, 527 00:24:58,330 --> 00:25:00,916 dreams do come true. 528 00:25:02,250 --> 00:25:07,339 Hey, I'm glad you didn't pull a LeBron on us, teammate. 529 00:25:07,797 --> 00:25:10,133 That's me. 530 00:25:10,133 --> 00:25:11,384 Go team. 531 00:25:11,384 --> 00:25:12,427 Come on. 532 00:25:12,511 --> 00:25:13,887 Day one of the rest of your life. 533 00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:15,305 Let's do this. 534 00:25:31,988 --> 00:25:33,365 Small. 535 00:25:33,365 --> 00:25:35,450 Thank you, Jack Guy. 536 00:25:46,211 --> 00:25:47,504 Really? 537 00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:49,756 Fuck. 538 00:25:51,967 --> 00:25:54,469 Now we're talking! 539 00:26:04,312 --> 00:26:06,314 What sweating problem? 540 00:26:25,875 --> 00:26:26,459 That's 20 541 00:26:26,459 --> 00:26:27,961 bucks old man. 542 00:26:30,046 --> 00:26:32,048 This better be good shit. 543 00:26:35,635 --> 00:26:38,346 Since when do you get to the gym during serious training hour? 544 00:26:38,888 --> 00:26:40,974 We're filming a show aren't we? 545 00:26:40,974 --> 00:26:42,934 Since when, do you want to do the show? 546 00:26:42,934 --> 00:26:44,894 Bobby, stop talking to me. 547 00:26:48,023 --> 00:26:49,899 Oh. 548 00:26:50,066 --> 00:26:52,027 What are you "ohhhh'ing" about? 549 00:26:52,402 --> 00:26:54,029 You got a little thing for Jack's niece, huh? 550 00:26:54,029 --> 00:26:56,656 So I guess you made up with my Uncle? 551 00:26:59,200 --> 00:26:59,826 Hi. 552 00:26:59,951 --> 00:27:00,744 Hi. 553 00:27:00,869 --> 00:27:01,786 Hey. 554 00:27:02,829 --> 00:27:09,586 Wow. Uhhh-- You look fit. 555 00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:11,671 This is awkward. 556 00:27:11,671 --> 00:27:14,299 I'm gonna go shoot glutamine in my ass. 557 00:27:15,675 --> 00:27:18,762 So you're the Chris Long? 558 00:27:19,012 --> 00:27:21,348 You didn't think I'd figure it out, did you? 559 00:27:21,348 --> 00:27:24,768 I didn't really take you for the basketball fan. 560 00:27:25,644 --> 00:27:26,561 Wait. Basketball? 561 00:27:26,561 --> 00:27:28,605 No, I was referring to the fish. 562 00:27:28,772 --> 00:27:31,691 It was signed Chris Long. 563 00:27:32,108 --> 00:27:34,152 The painting, right? Yes. 564 00:27:35,236 --> 00:27:36,071 Duh, me. 565 00:27:36,863 --> 00:27:37,364 I'm. I'm. 566 00:27:37,364 --> 00:27:40,033 I'm impressed you were able to read my signature. 567 00:27:40,033 --> 00:27:43,119 Most people tell me it just looks like a like a C and a star. 568 00:27:43,370 --> 00:27:45,747 Why didn't you say anything? 569 00:27:45,789 --> 00:27:48,541 Oh, I uh-- you seemed so happy. 570 00:27:48,541 --> 00:27:50,502 Who was I to interfere. Right? 571 00:27:51,461 --> 00:27:53,630 I can't believe you painted that. 572 00:27:53,630 --> 00:27:57,300 It's so cute. 573 00:27:57,717 --> 00:27:59,511 Well, thank you. I'm. 574 00:27:59,511 --> 00:28:00,595 I'm glad that you. 575 00:28:00,595 --> 00:28:01,554 You liked it. 576 00:28:01,554 --> 00:28:03,848 I named him Frank. Frank, the fish. 577 00:28:04,307 --> 00:28:05,350 Do you mind? 578 00:28:05,392 --> 00:28:07,185 What? That you stole my painting. 579 00:28:07,185 --> 00:28:09,521 Or that you renamed Belvedere? 580 00:28:11,064 --> 00:28:13,274 OK. Good morning, everyone. 581 00:28:13,274 --> 00:28:16,027 Welcome to the Dumbbells experience. 582 00:28:16,027 --> 00:28:18,196 We're going to have a lot of fun today, 583 00:28:18,196 --> 00:28:21,366 but first, I'd like us all to give a big, warm Dumbbells 584 00:28:21,366 --> 00:28:24,911 welcome to our very own Dumbbells, girls. 585 00:28:34,504 --> 00:28:35,714 And I'd also like us 586 00:28:35,714 --> 00:28:38,174 to give a big hand to our very acclaimed director. 587 00:28:38,758 --> 00:28:40,301 Famous for his award winning short. 588 00:28:40,301 --> 00:28:41,803 "I think it's HPV." Mr. 589 00:28:41,803 --> 00:28:43,221 Sterling, LaBeouf. 590 00:28:43,221 --> 00:28:44,723 Jones. 591 00:28:47,350 --> 00:28:49,602 (French jibberish) 592 00:28:49,602 --> 00:28:52,564 I'm pretty sure this guy doesn't realize he's in America. 593 00:28:52,772 --> 00:28:54,023 (French jibberish) 594 00:28:54,524 --> 00:28:55,442 Thank you, Sterling. 595 00:28:55,984 --> 00:28:58,153 So now we're going to do a little B roll, 596 00:28:58,153 --> 00:29:02,866 so please do me a fav, just pair up, work out. 597 00:29:02,866 --> 00:29:04,492 And most importantly just mingle. 598 00:29:04,492 --> 00:29:07,662 Pretend like we're not even here, but it is television. 599 00:29:08,413 --> 00:29:10,665 So remember, it's all about looking hot. 600 00:29:11,416 --> 00:29:13,501 But please, don't sweat. 601 00:29:14,127 --> 00:29:16,212 OK, let's do this. Dumbbell teams out. 602 00:29:17,005 --> 00:29:17,338 Whoo! 603 00:29:20,175 --> 00:29:22,093 We're partners right? 604 00:29:24,846 --> 00:29:27,640 But then I discovered what I loved which was psychotherapy. 605 00:29:28,433 --> 00:29:30,101 Psychotherapy? 606 00:29:30,101 --> 00:29:30,643 Yep. 607 00:29:30,643 --> 00:29:32,896 I'm going to be a therapist. 608 00:29:33,563 --> 00:29:35,023 Really? What? 609 00:29:35,023 --> 00:29:36,566 You sound surprised. 610 00:29:36,566 --> 00:29:39,277 No, it's just kind of funny because people are always telling me 611 00:29:39,277 --> 00:29:41,446 that I need therapy. 612 00:29:41,529 --> 00:29:42,572 Great stuff. 613 00:29:42,572 --> 00:29:43,156 Keep going. 614 00:29:43,156 --> 00:29:45,366 I love the honesty. 615 00:29:47,535 --> 00:29:49,245 Physical therapy. 616 00:29:49,245 --> 00:29:50,622 I mean, 617 00:29:51,456 --> 00:29:54,292 and that is why I work out here. 618 00:29:55,710 --> 00:29:56,669 Let's go Dumbbells! 619 00:29:58,630 --> 00:30:00,799 Can you believe this shit? 620 00:30:00,799 --> 00:30:01,090 Yeah. 621 00:30:01,090 --> 00:30:03,259 It's a total exploitation of women. 622 00:30:04,010 --> 00:30:05,220 I'm talking about Chris. 623 00:30:05,220 --> 00:30:08,181 Oh. He's actually talking to her as if she's a person. 624 00:30:10,892 --> 00:30:13,353 So you obviously don't like talking about basketball. 625 00:30:13,353 --> 00:30:14,312 So what I want to know 626 00:30:14,312 --> 00:30:16,898 is, other than adorable fish, what else do you paint? 627 00:30:17,190 --> 00:30:20,068 I don't really paint that much anymore. 628 00:30:20,527 --> 00:30:21,611 You're good. You should keep at it. 629 00:30:24,030 --> 00:30:25,406 Are you drinking soda? 630 00:30:25,406 --> 00:30:26,658 You out of your fucking mind? 631 00:30:26,658 --> 00:30:28,785 I don't put that shit in my body. 632 00:30:28,785 --> 00:30:30,286 I'm downing some C.O.C. 633 00:30:30,286 --> 00:30:31,996 Cellular oxygen, creatine. 634 00:30:31,996 --> 00:30:32,705 A liquid formula 635 00:30:32,705 --> 00:30:33,122 that triples 636 00:30:33,122 --> 00:30:36,459 my amino acid circulation while quadrupling my recovery time by five. 637 00:30:37,001 --> 00:30:38,753 Plus it tastes like cherries. 638 00:30:39,963 --> 00:30:43,216 Yea I was uh-- the captain of the gymnastics squad. 639 00:30:44,425 --> 00:30:46,636 I'm gonna get a quick drink from the water fountain. 640 00:30:46,803 --> 00:30:47,387 All right. 641 00:30:47,387 --> 00:30:48,137 OK, so I'll be. 642 00:30:48,137 --> 00:30:49,013 I'll be right back. 643 00:30:49,013 --> 00:30:49,806 OK. 644 00:30:49,806 --> 00:30:53,101 Oh, did you drop something? 645 00:31:02,652 --> 00:31:04,070 How's the date going? 646 00:31:04,445 --> 00:31:06,072 It is not a date. 647 00:31:06,072 --> 00:31:07,448 It looks like a date from over here. 648 00:31:07,448 --> 00:31:08,658 It is not a date. 649 00:31:09,284 --> 00:31:13,746 Just tell her how you feel. 650 00:31:14,747 --> 00:31:16,875 Hey. Why is only one of your pits Niagara Falling? 651 00:31:19,627 --> 00:31:21,462 OK. Are 652 00:31:21,462 --> 00:31:23,965 we ready for the exciting time of the show? 653 00:31:24,841 --> 00:31:26,759 Gather round, gather round! 654 00:31:30,889 --> 00:31:31,848 You could selling to all these people. 655 00:31:33,224 --> 00:31:35,435 Keep your voice down, ok? 656 00:31:35,852 --> 00:31:37,520 They're still shooting. 657 00:31:37,520 --> 00:31:38,521 Namaste! 658 00:31:38,855 --> 00:31:41,941 I can't have cameras rolling 25/8. 659 00:31:42,358 --> 00:31:43,443 But the gym's only open from, like, 660 00:31:43,443 --> 00:31:45,904 6 to 9? 661 00:31:50,241 --> 00:31:52,785 You guys ready to meet your celebrity host? 662 00:31:52,785 --> 00:31:55,330 Come on, come on, alright. 663 00:31:55,330 --> 00:31:57,832 Now, this is a personal friend of mine, 664 00:31:57,832 --> 00:31:59,918 and he just happens to be 665 00:31:59,918 --> 00:32:03,463 one of the iconic sex symbols of our era. 666 00:32:03,713 --> 00:32:05,757 Is it Brad Pitt? 667 00:32:05,798 --> 00:32:07,008 No, no. 668 00:32:07,008 --> 00:32:09,677 Oh my God. Is it Matthew McConaughey? 669 00:32:09,677 --> 00:32:10,178 No. 670 00:32:10,178 --> 00:32:11,846 Hulk Hogan? 671 00:32:11,846 --> 00:32:13,181 Would you shut the fuck up, people. 672 00:32:13,181 --> 00:32:13,932 Let me do this. 673 00:32:13,932 --> 00:32:16,476 All right, come on. OK. 674 00:32:17,894 --> 00:32:19,562 Drumroll, please. 675 00:32:20,229 --> 00:32:22,815 Dumbbells girls, please take your places. 676 00:32:26,778 --> 00:32:28,988 All right. With great pleasure. 677 00:32:29,238 --> 00:32:31,199 I would like to introduce 678 00:32:31,574 --> 00:32:32,742 the one 679 00:32:33,326 --> 00:32:34,202 the only 680 00:32:35,578 --> 00:32:36,871 the fabulous 681 00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:38,706 FABIO! 682 00:32:39,082 --> 00:32:39,958 Whala! 683 00:32:40,416 --> 00:32:42,710 YES! YES! 684 00:32:45,672 --> 00:32:47,340 Yes, I'm fucking stoked!!! 685 00:32:48,508 --> 00:32:49,968 Have you tried his protein powder? 686 00:32:49,968 --> 00:32:51,469 It's fucking fantastic. 687 00:33:40,685 --> 00:33:41,644 So what'd you do? 688 00:33:41,644 --> 00:33:45,064 You try rehabilitating it or something? 689 00:33:46,065 --> 00:33:47,108 I did. I did. 690 00:33:47,108 --> 00:33:49,569 And it was going really good too. 691 00:33:49,569 --> 00:33:51,070 I was making really good progress. 692 00:33:51,070 --> 00:33:53,197 Had some of the best physical therapists there were. 693 00:33:53,823 --> 00:33:56,743 The Miami Heat even invited me to their summer league. 694 00:33:57,201 --> 00:34:00,204 Wow. That's amazing. 695 00:34:00,204 --> 00:34:02,248 I mean, the truth is, 696 00:34:02,248 --> 00:34:04,417 I was never better than 697 00:34:04,500 --> 00:34:07,962 50% after my injury. 698 00:34:10,006 --> 00:34:10,506 It's crazy 699 00:34:10,506 --> 00:34:14,052 how life takes us in directions we least expect, huh? 700 00:34:15,136 --> 00:34:16,596 Tell me about it. 701 00:34:16,596 --> 00:34:18,306 Hey! Turdface! 702 00:34:18,890 --> 00:34:23,227 Some icky blond tramp just threw up in front of my salon 703 00:34:23,561 --> 00:34:25,646 and we can hear your music blasting. 704 00:34:26,189 --> 00:34:29,233 Ivana, listen, OK, I know when you were a little brat, 705 00:34:29,233 --> 00:34:31,319 your dad gave you all the puppies and ponies you wanted. 706 00:34:31,319 --> 00:34:33,696 But in the adult world, you can take a time out. 707 00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:38,117 What time fucking in, Mr. 708 00:34:38,493 --> 00:34:40,328 It wasn't a pony, it was a stallion. 709 00:34:40,328 --> 00:34:41,412 And his name was Prancer. 710 00:34:41,412 --> 00:34:44,165 And he was perfect and now he's dead. So fuck you! 711 00:34:48,044 --> 00:34:51,005 This computer's like 70 years old. 712 00:34:51,005 --> 00:34:51,964 Let's get out of here. 713 00:34:51,964 --> 00:34:53,633 So is your mother. 714 00:34:55,051 --> 00:34:57,637 And this is the point in the story 715 00:34:57,637 --> 00:35:02,350 where I realize I haven't been this happy in a really long time. 716 00:35:02,558 --> 00:35:05,895 It turns out Jack Guy's not so bad after all. 717 00:35:06,187 --> 00:35:07,939 Gym's busier than ever. 718 00:35:07,939 --> 00:35:10,566 And dare I say I'm smitten. 719 00:35:15,363 --> 00:35:17,490 Are you kidding me? 720 00:35:33,881 --> 00:35:34,674 Hello? 721 00:35:34,715 --> 00:35:36,509 Hey, Chris, it's Kimmy. 722 00:35:36,509 --> 00:35:39,720 Miss me? Of course you do. Oh, my gosh. 723 00:35:39,720 --> 00:35:42,849 Daddy and I just got back from Sandro Pe, you would not believe it 724 00:35:42,849 --> 00:35:46,394 I am so tan, but like perfect, not too tan because that's gross. 725 00:35:46,394 --> 00:35:47,937 it's like the best skin color, ever... 726 00:36:02,326 --> 00:36:03,244 Day one. 727 00:36:04,245 --> 00:36:06,330 25/8 success. 728 00:36:08,249 --> 00:36:09,125 Jack? 729 00:36:09,667 --> 00:36:11,711 Chris, what are you still doing here? 730 00:36:12,753 --> 00:36:15,131 I didn't realize anybody was still here. 731 00:36:15,131 --> 00:36:16,632 I was using the Internet. 732 00:36:16,632 --> 00:36:18,634 You don't have the Internet at home.? 733 00:36:18,634 --> 00:36:21,012 Well, I kind of haven't paid the bill in the last couple... 734 00:36:21,470 --> 00:36:22,722 seven months. 735 00:36:22,722 --> 00:36:23,890 So no. 736 00:36:25,016 --> 00:36:26,475 Money problems, huh? 737 00:36:26,475 --> 00:36:27,602 You know what they say? 738 00:36:27,602 --> 00:36:28,477 Mo money. 739 00:36:28,477 --> 00:36:30,396 Mo problems. 740 00:36:32,773 --> 00:36:33,149 Yeah. 741 00:36:33,149 --> 00:36:34,650 What do they say about no money? 742 00:36:34,650 --> 00:36:36,277 Oh, excuse. 743 00:36:37,987 --> 00:36:38,529 Maria. 744 00:36:38,529 --> 00:36:40,573 Que tal? 745 00:36:40,573 --> 00:36:43,492 Si. Que? Oh, no problemo. 746 00:36:43,993 --> 00:36:47,538 Oh, eh tambien, en pun 747 00:36:47,538 --> 00:36:50,041 un case de Dos Equis 748 00:36:50,041 --> 00:36:52,418 en la nevera, si. 749 00:36:52,418 --> 00:36:55,296 Mis amigos Vien and Salvador. 750 00:36:55,630 --> 00:36:56,505 Si. 751 00:36:56,631 --> 00:36:58,674 Muchos gracias. Denada. 752 00:36:59,300 --> 00:37:00,218 Buenos Noches. 753 00:37:00,218 --> 00:37:01,594 Cao cao, Maria. 754 00:37:07,308 --> 00:37:09,227 You speak Spanish. 755 00:37:09,268 --> 00:37:10,728 What a surprise. 756 00:37:10,728 --> 00:37:12,730 I used to date Sofia Vergara. 757 00:37:13,981 --> 00:37:16,025 Dude, shouldn't you be at home spooning 758 00:37:16,025 --> 00:37:18,402 with your Victoria's Secret supermodel wife? 759 00:37:19,445 --> 00:37:20,863 Let me tell you something about me, Chris. 760 00:37:20,863 --> 00:37:23,491 When I start filming something. 761 00:37:23,491 --> 00:37:25,326 I never leave base camp. 762 00:37:25,326 --> 00:37:26,202 It's 25/8. 763 00:37:26,202 --> 00:37:28,454 baby, it's not just the talk. 764 00:37:28,454 --> 00:37:29,789 I walk the walk. 765 00:37:29,789 --> 00:37:31,249 Hey, could you put a towel on? 766 00:37:33,459 --> 00:37:35,127 Not a locker room guy, huh? 767 00:37:35,127 --> 00:37:37,171 More like not a cock in my face, guy. 768 00:37:39,548 --> 00:37:40,633 You OK? 769 00:37:41,050 --> 00:37:43,511 Yes, I'm fine. 770 00:37:44,887 --> 00:37:46,055 You don't sound fine. 771 00:37:46,055 --> 00:37:49,433 I'm fine. 772 00:37:53,938 --> 00:37:55,731 I know that look. 773 00:37:56,190 --> 00:37:57,275 What's her name? 774 00:38:03,030 --> 00:38:05,032 OK, I know what to do. 775 00:38:09,453 --> 00:38:11,455 Get comfortable. 776 00:38:11,998 --> 00:38:13,624 What are you doing? 777 00:38:13,708 --> 00:38:16,460 Bro. Therapy saved my life. 778 00:38:19,005 --> 00:38:21,132 What is with everybody? 779 00:38:21,299 --> 00:38:23,592 I don't need therapy! 780 00:38:23,759 --> 00:38:28,681 She said she loved-- She said she loved me! 781 00:38:28,764 --> 00:38:33,227 Guess what Kim? I don't want to play in the NBA anyway. You materialistic, fuck! 782 00:38:33,978 --> 00:38:36,439 If she loved me then why did she leave? 783 00:38:36,605 --> 00:38:38,065 Why don't you go whiten your teeth again? 784 00:38:38,232 --> 00:38:40,109 Why don't you throw up that hamburger in the toilet again? 785 00:38:40,109 --> 00:38:41,193 You didn't think I can hear it. 786 00:38:41,527 --> 00:38:43,446 I can hear it every time! 787 00:38:43,904 --> 00:38:45,656 She didn't even say goodbye. 788 00:38:46,407 --> 00:38:47,992 She left a note. 789 00:38:47,992 --> 00:38:49,827 It wasn't even grammatically correct. 790 00:38:49,827 --> 00:38:50,786 And you know what else? 791 00:38:50,786 --> 00:38:53,372 That painting that I did for you, guess what? 792 00:38:53,539 --> 00:38:56,000 It was runner up in the Santa Monica amateur arts festival. 793 00:38:56,709 --> 00:38:58,794 Two years in a row, beotch! 794 00:38:59,003 --> 00:39:00,254 I guess what bothers me 795 00:39:00,254 --> 00:39:03,341 the most is obsessively pondering over what I could have been. 796 00:39:03,883 --> 00:39:05,009 My true potential. 797 00:39:05,009 --> 00:39:10,598 An NBA Star, League MVP, happily married to Kim. 798 00:39:11,432 --> 00:39:13,434 Or anything other than what I am now. 799 00:39:15,186 --> 00:39:15,936 Chris. 800 00:39:16,479 --> 00:39:18,856 Sometimes we need to lose everything that we think we want 801 00:39:19,482 --> 00:39:21,817 in order to discover who it is that we really are. 802 00:39:22,902 --> 00:39:24,320 That's deep. 803 00:39:24,737 --> 00:39:26,822 It's a magnet on my refrigerator. 804 00:39:26,822 --> 00:39:28,282 $4.95. 805 00:39:28,282 --> 00:39:30,493 I can show you the place where I get them, they're amazing. 806 00:39:31,285 --> 00:39:32,828 She told me if I passed the exam, 807 00:39:32,828 --> 00:39:34,997 I could work for her father's real estate company. 808 00:39:35,581 --> 00:39:40,544 $75,000 starting salary. 809 00:39:41,045 --> 00:39:45,883 She goes on a retreat, and now all of a sudden, she appears. 810 00:39:46,300 --> 00:39:48,344 I mean, where's she been? And why do I still give a shit? 811 00:39:49,136 --> 00:39:51,597 If you didn't give a shit, you'd be just like her. 812 00:39:52,139 --> 00:39:54,475 Be thankful. 813 00:39:54,558 --> 00:39:56,143 You know what. You're right. 814 00:39:56,310 --> 00:39:58,479 You're absolutely right. 815 00:39:58,979 --> 00:40:01,357 Don't beat yourself up, pal. 816 00:40:03,067 --> 00:40:05,528 That injury is probably the best thing that could happen to you. 817 00:40:06,529 --> 00:40:08,864 That injury saved your life. 818 00:40:10,741 --> 00:40:12,201 I don't need her, 819 00:40:12,201 --> 00:40:14,370 and I don't need her daddy's money. 820 00:40:14,870 --> 00:40:17,373 I've got things going on in my life. 821 00:40:17,373 --> 00:40:18,332 I've got. 822 00:40:18,916 --> 00:40:20,334 I've got Jack Guy. 823 00:40:20,334 --> 00:40:21,544 That's right, brother. 824 00:40:21,961 --> 00:40:23,421 I've got Dumbbells 25/8. 825 00:40:23,421 --> 00:40:24,672 Right? 826 00:40:27,007 --> 00:40:28,259 Ya know Jack, 827 00:40:28,717 --> 00:40:31,220 I am feeling really good right now. 828 00:40:31,512 --> 00:40:34,974 And, you know, I don't know if it's just the 14 energy 829 00:40:34,974 --> 00:40:38,102 drinks, but my knee feels amazing. 830 00:40:38,102 --> 00:40:40,146 I mean, look at this, huh? Hi-Ya! 831 00:40:41,105 --> 00:40:43,649 Everybody should try therapy once, huh? 832 00:40:47,319 --> 00:40:49,905 Hey, dumbass. Did you forget to lock the door last night? 833 00:40:49,905 --> 00:40:51,490 I was a little tipsy. 834 00:40:51,490 --> 00:40:53,409 Wait, do you hear music? 835 00:41:15,055 --> 00:41:17,099 Good morning! 836 00:41:21,145 --> 00:41:22,188 Who wants breakfast? 837 00:41:22,688 --> 00:41:24,773 Energy drink? 838 00:41:26,442 --> 00:41:29,236 Hey, there he is! 839 00:41:29,737 --> 00:41:31,572 Day two, baby. 840 00:41:32,114 --> 00:41:33,782 Ready to do this, buddy? 841 00:41:33,991 --> 00:41:36,160 Nice wheels. 842 00:41:37,453 --> 00:41:38,871 Hey, Jack. 843 00:41:38,871 --> 00:41:40,539 Hey, something wrong? 844 00:41:40,623 --> 00:41:44,502 I've been an A-hole, a jerk to both of you. 845 00:41:45,169 --> 00:41:47,296 And I want you to know that 846 00:41:48,005 --> 00:41:50,716 I think you're both equally amazing. 847 00:41:51,175 --> 00:41:52,968 These were my issues that I was dealing with. 848 00:41:55,095 --> 00:41:57,139 The check bounced you asshole. 849 00:41:57,139 --> 00:41:59,183 Come on. Come on. Really? 850 00:41:59,683 --> 00:42:02,019 There must be some mistake come-- Fabs You know I'm good for it. 851 00:42:02,019 --> 00:42:04,230 Listen, don't call me Fab. It's Fabio. 852 00:42:04,563 --> 00:42:05,564 Fab-ee-o. 853 00:42:05,689 --> 00:42:06,857 Ee-o. 854 00:42:06,857 --> 00:42:07,566 Fab-ee-o. 855 00:42:07,691 --> 00:42:08,817 Yeah, Fabio. 856 00:42:08,817 --> 00:42:09,610 Ee-o. 857 00:42:09,735 --> 00:42:11,529 Yeah, ee-o, ee-o, you idiot. 858 00:42:12,279 --> 00:42:14,198 B-T-Dubs. 859 00:42:14,865 --> 00:42:16,784 I like Rachel. There. 860 00:42:16,784 --> 00:42:18,911 I said it. I don't even care if she's standing right behind me. 861 00:42:18,953 --> 00:42:20,037 I like Rachel. 862 00:42:20,037 --> 00:42:23,832 I really like Rachel. 863 00:42:24,208 --> 00:42:27,670 She's smart, funny, flexible. 864 00:42:28,170 --> 00:42:29,755 Might try poking her later. 865 00:42:29,755 --> 00:42:32,591 Facebook wise, of course. 866 00:42:32,591 --> 00:42:33,342 Saul! 867 00:42:33,342 --> 00:42:35,761 Call me back for the fourth time. 868 00:42:35,761 --> 00:42:36,762 Where the hell are you? 869 00:42:36,762 --> 00:42:40,266 I've got a huge problem. 870 00:42:42,184 --> 00:42:43,394 What's wrong? 871 00:42:45,437 --> 00:42:48,399 Fabio, quit. 872 00:42:49,733 --> 00:42:51,944 Oh. Why? 873 00:42:51,944 --> 00:42:53,737 Because he's a dick. 874 00:42:53,737 --> 00:42:56,115 And the check I wrote him bounced, probably didn't help. 875 00:42:57,366 --> 00:42:58,075 Oh. 876 00:42:58,325 --> 00:43:00,202 I mean, I've got my money manager on it, 877 00:43:00,202 --> 00:43:01,495 but what it means is 878 00:43:01,495 --> 00:43:04,331 I've got everybody here, but gotta send them home and still pay for. 879 00:43:05,124 --> 00:43:06,667 You should host the show. 880 00:43:06,667 --> 00:43:08,586 You're always doing modeling campaigns, 881 00:43:08,586 --> 00:43:10,629 you're used to being in front of a camera. 882 00:43:10,629 --> 00:43:12,172 Why don't you do it? 883 00:43:12,172 --> 00:43:13,090 Come on, buddy. 884 00:43:13,090 --> 00:43:14,800 You can host this show, hell 885 00:43:14,800 --> 00:43:17,720 you through 28 touchdowns in a single game! 886 00:43:18,262 --> 00:43:19,179 That was in a season. 887 00:43:22,975 --> 00:43:24,977 That does make more sense. 888 00:43:24,977 --> 00:43:25,519 Yeah. 889 00:43:25,561 --> 00:43:28,314 Kind of thought it was bullshit when I first heard about that. 890 00:43:29,023 --> 00:43:29,773 But that's irrelevant. 891 00:43:29,773 --> 00:43:33,027 OK, because you did rush for 300 yards 892 00:43:33,277 --> 00:43:35,821 with the stomach flu on a bad ankle, did you not? 893 00:43:36,113 --> 00:43:37,740 How do you even know that? 894 00:43:37,740 --> 00:43:40,034 I Google, Facebook, MySpace, Wikipedia, and Twitter'd you. 895 00:43:40,659 --> 00:43:42,703 Plus, you told me last night right before power napped. 896 00:43:46,665 --> 00:43:47,082 We're all 897 00:43:47,082 --> 00:43:49,960 looking through the point of view of our own reality tunnel man. 898 00:43:50,169 --> 00:43:54,048 And every reality tunnel is different. 899 00:43:54,256 --> 00:43:57,301 Did you know that Wikipedia says Fabio's protein is better than water? 900 00:43:57,885 --> 00:43:58,844 Probably right. 901 00:44:19,657 --> 00:44:20,908 (Scream!) 902 00:44:22,034 --> 00:44:26,288 What you did with my lashes to make my eyes pop, perfect, I love that. 903 00:44:26,789 --> 00:44:27,581 (French jibberish) 904 00:44:27,581 --> 00:44:28,540 Ready to roll Sterling? 905 00:44:29,500 --> 00:44:32,419 (French jibberish) 906 00:44:32,628 --> 00:44:33,253 What's going on? 907 00:44:33,253 --> 00:44:34,713 Why is Jack getting concealer applied? 908 00:44:34,713 --> 00:44:37,174 His skin is perfect. 909 00:44:37,174 --> 00:44:39,760 I've used a lot cleanser that's how I keep my skin smooth. 910 00:44:40,010 --> 00:44:40,844 Fabio, quit. 911 00:44:40,844 --> 00:44:41,929 Jack's the host. 912 00:44:41,929 --> 00:44:44,682 And Chris is a fucking Alien. Jack. 913 00:44:46,100 --> 00:44:47,351 Odd, Todd, what's up? 914 00:44:47,351 --> 00:44:48,018 I was 915 00:44:48,018 --> 00:44:51,480 uh-- trying to upload the footage to your Mac from yesterday 916 00:44:51,522 --> 00:44:53,023 like you told me, but for some reason, 917 00:44:53,023 --> 00:44:56,026 it doesn't seem that the, uh-- footage actually recorded. 918 00:44:56,902 --> 00:44:57,653 What? 919 00:44:57,945 --> 00:44:59,488 (French jibberish) 920 00:44:59,988 --> 00:45:01,573 Sterling just hold on for a second alright? 921 00:45:01,573 --> 00:45:03,909 (French jibberish) 922 00:45:04,702 --> 00:45:05,577 how is that possible? 923 00:45:05,577 --> 00:45:07,121 I mean, how could that be? 924 00:45:07,955 --> 00:45:10,582 32 gigabytes of, beer! 925 00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:17,756 I-- I don't know. 926 00:45:18,173 --> 00:45:20,384 (French jibberish) 927 00:45:20,718 --> 00:45:22,302 Sterling, did you know about this? 928 00:45:22,594 --> 00:45:31,103 (French jibberish) 929 00:45:33,605 --> 00:45:36,734 I don't understand one fucking word you're saying. 930 00:45:36,775 --> 00:45:39,111 Does anyone here speak idiot? 931 00:45:39,570 --> 00:45:39,945 (French jibberish) 932 00:45:40,654 --> 00:45:43,949 Alright just fuck it, you know what, if you needs something 933 00:45:43,949 --> 00:45:45,492 done, right. You got to do it yourself. Just. 934 00:45:45,492 --> 00:45:47,202 Just roll, Sterling, I'm ready to go. Let's do this! 935 00:45:47,661 --> 00:45:48,704 (French jibberish) 936 00:45:52,207 --> 00:45:53,417 Fucking bitch. 937 00:45:53,417 --> 00:45:55,085 Are you the owner of this establishment? 938 00:45:55,544 --> 00:45:56,503 I am. 939 00:45:56,503 --> 00:45:59,256 I'm with the Department of Health and pardon the pun, 940 00:45:59,923 --> 00:46:03,010 but you need to get your shit together. 941 00:46:06,805 --> 00:46:09,016 Have a nice day. 942 00:46:13,896 --> 00:46:18,108 (French jibberish) 943 00:46:23,739 --> 00:46:25,991 Hello, America! Uh-- 944 00:46:28,035 --> 00:46:29,870 We're in the gym. 945 00:46:30,204 --> 00:46:31,747 Uh. Uhhh-- 946 00:46:32,039 --> 00:46:33,832 28/5, Uh-- 947 00:46:34,249 --> 00:46:37,336 Uh-- 20, 25, Uh-- Uh, 25. 948 00:46:37,628 --> 00:46:40,214 Dumbbells 25/8 949 00:46:41,673 --> 00:46:42,633 is it fitness center? 950 00:46:42,633 --> 00:46:44,468 Or is it gym? 951 00:46:46,512 --> 00:46:47,721 G-- Is it g-- gym? 952 00:46:47,721 --> 00:46:50,224 OK. Uhhh-- But-- Yeah, I can't. 953 00:46:50,682 --> 00:46:52,392 I ca-- can't work like this. 954 00:46:52,392 --> 00:46:54,394 This is impossible! 955 00:47:01,193 --> 00:47:02,736 Hello, America. 956 00:47:03,445 --> 00:47:05,823 To be or not to be. 957 00:47:05,823 --> 00:47:08,033 That is the question. 958 00:47:08,659 --> 00:47:11,328 Aw, shit pancakes! 959 00:47:11,328 --> 00:47:13,497 You got to be shitting me right now. 960 00:47:13,497 --> 00:47:15,415 This is my fucking opportunity. 961 00:47:15,415 --> 00:47:18,210 Son of a bitch, motherfucker. 962 00:47:21,046 --> 00:47:22,840 Everything's OK. 963 00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:24,842 It's just a coincidence that all my checks are bouncing 964 00:47:25,425 --> 00:47:27,302 Saul travels a lot. 965 00:47:27,302 --> 00:47:28,512 It's always hard to get a hold of. 966 00:47:28,637 --> 00:47:29,763 Uncle Jack? 967 00:47:30,138 --> 00:47:31,723 Hello, Rachel. 968 00:47:32,140 --> 00:47:33,392 Are you OK? 969 00:47:33,392 --> 00:47:35,811 Just having a few communication issues. 970 00:47:36,186 --> 00:47:40,858 You know what I just thought of why don't you call Adriana? 971 00:47:41,441 --> 00:47:43,777 She would make a perfect host. Problem solved. 972 00:47:43,777 --> 00:47:45,988 Great idea. 973 00:47:45,988 --> 00:47:48,407 Yeah. Adriana. 974 00:47:48,407 --> 00:47:50,367 Adriana left me five months ago. 975 00:47:52,327 --> 00:47:57,332 Oh. Is this Arcturian, related? 976 00:47:57,875 --> 00:47:59,251 Arcturian? 977 00:47:59,501 --> 00:48:01,628 He was in a cult for 20 years. 978 00:48:02,337 --> 00:48:04,089 What like, Catholicism? 979 00:48:04,089 --> 00:48:06,216 No, they worshipped a star, Arcturus. 980 00:48:07,426 --> 00:48:09,887 Oh, they worshipped a star. 981 00:48:10,053 --> 00:48:12,347 Arcturus. Of course. 982 00:48:12,347 --> 00:48:14,892 But he escaped. 983 00:48:14,892 --> 00:48:16,435 Hey. 984 00:48:17,352 --> 00:48:19,771 Yes, he did. 985 00:48:19,771 --> 00:48:21,940 Yeah. Oh. Oh. Look at that! 986 00:48:22,482 --> 00:48:24,192 Things are looking brighter already. You see that? 987 00:48:24,192 --> 00:48:26,862 Literally brighter. 988 00:48:26,862 --> 00:48:27,946 And there he goes, folks. 989 00:48:27,946 --> 00:48:30,282 Money manager Saul Rosenblattsteinberg 990 00:48:30,282 --> 00:48:33,994 is being indicted on accusations of running a Ponzi scheme. 991 00:48:34,119 --> 00:48:37,831 Involving some of Hollywood's biggest names, many of whom are linked 992 00:48:37,831 --> 00:48:40,500 to the alleged cult known as Arcturian Lifestyles, 993 00:48:40,751 --> 00:48:43,921 which was first exposed by famous model and former member 994 00:48:43,921 --> 00:48:46,924 Jack Guy, who was also a victim in this tragic 995 00:48:46,924 --> 00:48:48,717 turn of events. 996 00:48:56,725 --> 00:48:57,517 Jack Guy 997 00:48:57,517 --> 00:48:59,561 had his demons, too, like all of us. 998 00:49:00,646 --> 00:49:01,688 Adriana never loved me. 999 00:49:01,688 --> 00:49:03,357 She said she did, but she didn't. 1000 00:49:04,983 --> 00:49:07,569 She wen't away on a photo shoot and she never even came back. 1001 00:49:07,569 --> 00:49:10,572 I didn't join the cult mother! 1002 00:49:11,198 --> 00:49:11,573 No one joins a cult! 1003 00:49:11,573 --> 00:49:14,576 I was brainwashed! 1004 00:49:15,744 --> 00:49:17,913 She fell in love with some German photographer with a ponytail. 1005 00:49:18,038 --> 00:49:21,249 They told me I was saving the world they said sign here. 1006 00:49:21,375 --> 00:49:23,418 You’ll help save the world. I signed! 1007 00:49:23,835 --> 00:49:25,420 What would you do!? 1008 00:49:25,712 --> 00:49:26,546 Dirk. 1009 00:49:26,713 --> 00:49:27,631 Dirk the jerk. 1010 00:49:27,631 --> 00:49:29,675 And to answer your question. 1011 00:49:29,675 --> 00:49:33,679 Yes. Yes, I did think the spaceships were coming! 1012 00:49:34,096 --> 00:49:35,138 I guess what bothers me 1013 00:49:35,138 --> 00:49:38,600 the most is that no one ever seems to take me seriously. 1014 00:49:39,434 --> 00:49:41,770 I mean, even in the cult, my nickname was Dipshit. 1015 00:49:43,021 --> 00:49:44,523 Therapy did the trick again. 1016 00:49:44,523 --> 00:49:46,108 But the truth still remained. 1017 00:49:46,108 --> 00:49:50,570 Jack Guy was flat broke, and now he couldn't pay his landlord. 1018 00:49:51,363 --> 00:49:53,782 Once again, I'm really, really sorry. 1019 00:49:55,450 --> 00:49:56,326 But in light of 1020 00:49:56,326 --> 00:49:58,620 everything that's happened, 1021 00:49:59,287 --> 00:50:03,250 unless some sort of miracle occurs, I strongly encourage 1022 00:50:03,250 --> 00:50:05,585 all of you to explore other employment opportunities. 1023 00:50:06,086 --> 00:50:08,755 Three days of working here, you get a shut down!? 1024 00:50:15,595 --> 00:50:17,222 She's pregnant. 1025 00:50:19,808 --> 00:50:21,435 You are the best, best, 1026 00:50:21,435 --> 00:50:23,687 best, best-- You're the bestest. 1027 00:50:27,065 --> 00:50:27,774 Chrissy-poo. 1028 00:50:28,233 --> 00:50:29,526 I love you. 1029 00:50:29,526 --> 00:50:31,987 You are perfect in every way. 1030 00:50:32,946 --> 00:50:34,656 Except for one itsy-bitsy 1031 00:50:34,865 --> 00:50:36,658 teeny tiny little thing. 1032 00:50:36,950 --> 00:50:38,410 What's that? 1033 00:50:38,410 --> 00:50:41,288 You're a fucking loser! LOSER! 1034 00:50:41,705 --> 00:50:43,832 Don't be so emotional Chris. 1035 00:50:43,832 --> 00:50:46,168 Loser. Loser. 1036 00:50:46,168 --> 00:50:48,754 You're an art major. Loser. 1037 00:50:48,879 --> 00:50:50,714 This is not my life! 1038 00:50:50,714 --> 00:50:51,798 LOSER! 1039 00:50:51,798 --> 00:50:53,508 This is someone else's life. 1040 00:51:09,858 --> 00:51:11,443 We take the underprivileged kids 1041 00:51:11,443 --> 00:51:14,946 that I work with to the park to get some outdoor activity. 1042 00:51:15,655 --> 00:51:20,660 I was thinking maybe you could come by and show some basketball moves 1043 00:51:20,660 --> 00:51:21,870 or something. 1044 00:51:25,499 --> 00:51:28,335 Yeah, that sounds awesome. 1045 00:51:34,841 --> 00:51:35,801 You're early. 1046 00:51:36,885 --> 00:51:41,223 I figured I could use some practice. 1047 00:51:43,141 --> 00:51:46,770 Let's play some basketball. 1048 00:52:07,749 --> 00:52:08,875 Ta-daaa! 1049 00:52:09,793 --> 00:52:11,002 I figured we'd have to eat. 1050 00:52:11,002 --> 00:52:11,878 Right. 1051 00:52:12,546 --> 00:52:14,631 Check it out. Hey, boo. Boo. 1052 00:52:14,756 --> 00:52:17,217 I got this picnic basket from the park ranger myself. 1053 00:52:17,217 --> 00:52:18,301 Boo boo. 1054 00:52:19,636 --> 00:52:20,846 Yogi Bear? 1055 00:52:23,431 --> 00:52:24,766 OK, let's eat. 1056 00:52:24,766 --> 00:52:27,727 First up, my famous homemade macaroni salad. 1057 00:52:27,853 --> 00:52:28,228 Chris-- 1058 00:52:28,228 --> 00:52:32,023 Next up is a 1981 bottle of merlot 1059 00:52:32,232 --> 00:52:35,026 given to me by my great grandmother over a decade ago. 1060 00:52:35,235 --> 00:52:37,404 For a special occasion. 1061 00:52:37,404 --> 00:52:40,115 And lastly for dessert, 1062 00:52:40,615 --> 00:52:42,576 peach and raspberry cobbler pie... 1063 00:52:47,831 --> 00:52:48,582 Oh, I'm sorry. 1064 00:52:48,582 --> 00:52:49,249 You wanted to say something... 1065 00:52:51,918 --> 00:52:52,586 I-- 1066 00:52:52,752 --> 00:52:56,173 If you're such a superstar player, how come you can't dunk? 1067 00:52:56,798 --> 00:53:00,135 Well, I actually used to be able to dunk pretty well back in the day, so. 1068 00:53:00,844 --> 00:53:03,054 I still don't think you can. 1069 00:53:04,222 --> 00:53:05,223 Bu-gawk! 1070 00:53:05,223 --> 00:53:06,016 Seriously, Manny! 1071 00:53:06,892 --> 00:53:09,853 I got ten baseball cards that says you can't. 1072 00:53:09,936 --> 00:53:11,188 Oooh. 1073 00:53:11,396 --> 00:53:11,897 All right. 1074 00:53:11,897 --> 00:53:14,316 OK, let's be nice. 1075 00:53:14,316 --> 00:53:15,609 Bu-gawk! Bok Bok Bok! Bu-gawk! 1076 00:53:15,609 --> 00:53:16,693 Manny! 1077 00:53:25,952 --> 00:53:26,578 Chris. Chris. 1078 00:53:26,661 --> 00:53:27,120 Chris. Chris. 1079 00:53:27,120 --> 00:53:28,872 Chris. Chris. Chris. Chris. Chris. 1080 00:53:29,039 --> 00:53:30,916 Chris. Chris. Chris. Chris. Chris. 1081 00:53:30,999 --> 00:53:32,876 Chris. Chris. Chris. Chris. Chris. 1082 00:53:32,959 --> 00:53:33,585 Please, God. 1083 00:53:33,585 --> 00:53:36,213 Don't make me look stupid in front of Rachel and all these kids. 1084 00:54:15,377 --> 00:54:16,336 Hey, baby. Huh? 1085 00:54:16,336 --> 00:54:18,004 I got back early. 1086 00:54:19,756 --> 00:54:21,132 What's going on? 1087 00:54:21,132 --> 00:54:21,800 Look at you. 1088 00:54:21,800 --> 00:54:23,885 You look healthy. 1089 00:54:25,220 --> 00:54:26,846 What's. What's up with all the rug rats? 1090 00:54:26,846 --> 00:54:28,848 Wow, Chris, I'm really sorry. 1091 00:54:28,890 --> 00:54:31,518 I never saw that one coming. 1092 00:54:31,518 --> 00:54:36,064 Yeah, me neither, Manny. Me neither. 1093 00:54:36,314 --> 00:54:37,315 Is this like a charity thing 1094 00:54:37,315 --> 00:54:41,194 or homeless people thing? 1095 00:54:42,862 --> 00:54:44,406 Yes. No, that's. 1096 00:54:44,406 --> 00:54:45,156 Hey, that's fair. 1097 00:54:45,156 --> 00:54:47,242 You know, that's how you feel, so. 1098 00:54:47,242 --> 00:54:48,994 Yes, for sure. OK. 1099 00:54:48,994 --> 00:54:49,828 See you at lunch. 1100 00:54:50,829 --> 00:54:51,705 All right. 1101 00:54:51,705 --> 00:54:54,124 Well, listen, that was my boss. 1102 00:54:54,374 --> 00:54:56,584 And he saw you coming in. And good news. 1103 00:54:56,584 --> 00:54:58,545 He thinks you look like a movie star. 1104 00:54:58,545 --> 00:55:00,463 Yeah, an action hero. Hi-ya! 1105 00:55:01,464 --> 00:55:03,300 Ge-ge-ge-pfshhh! 1106 00:55:03,633 --> 00:55:06,177 No, Daddy, I love you stuff. 1107 00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:07,679 So does 1108 00:55:08,471 --> 00:55:10,056 that mean I have the loan? 1109 00:55:10,056 --> 00:55:12,434 No. No. Oh, God, no. 1110 00:55:12,434 --> 00:55:14,144 No. In fact, I believe his words were. 1111 00:55:14,144 --> 00:55:16,104 Get him out of my building. 1112 00:55:16,104 --> 00:55:17,897 I'm not really sure, because when he gets angry, 1113 00:55:17,897 --> 00:55:21,026 he yells in Korean, which is weird, because he's from Europe. 1114 00:55:21,067 --> 00:55:21,651 The loan? 1115 00:55:21,651 --> 00:55:22,652 No, that's. 1116 00:55:22,652 --> 00:55:25,155 No, you're not even close to getting a loan. 1117 00:55:25,488 --> 00:55:28,491 You have no assets to speak of, like, whatsoever. 1118 00:55:28,908 --> 00:55:29,326 It's. 1119 00:55:29,492 --> 00:55:31,411 It's kind of embarrassing, actually, a man of your age, 1120 00:55:31,411 --> 00:55:33,580 when, in fact, you owe a ton of people a ton of money. 1121 00:55:33,580 --> 00:55:36,916 So let's hope they're not Italian. 1122 00:55:36,916 --> 00:55:37,751 Chris, 1123 00:55:38,376 --> 00:55:40,211 Chris, wait up. Chris? 1124 00:55:40,211 --> 00:55:42,047 Yeah. What's up? 1125 00:55:42,047 --> 00:55:44,049 I'm sorry. Look, I meant to tell you. 1126 00:55:44,049 --> 00:55:46,176 Don't be silly. Look, it's totally cool. I just. 1127 00:55:46,468 --> 00:55:47,135 What time is it? 1128 00:55:47,135 --> 00:55:49,679 I promised a friend that I would help him move today. 1129 00:55:49,679 --> 00:55:51,723 I got to get to IKEA. 1130 00:55:51,723 --> 00:55:52,307 Chris. 1131 00:55:52,307 --> 00:55:53,767 t's totally cool. You're engaged. 1132 00:55:53,892 --> 00:55:54,517 Not a big deal. 1133 00:55:54,517 --> 00:55:56,269 I mean, he looks like a successful guy. 1134 00:55:56,269 --> 00:55:56,978 Chris. 1135 00:55:56,978 --> 00:55:58,688 Look, I just came help you with the kids right? 1136 00:55:58,688 --> 00:55:59,272 Babe? 1137 00:55:59,898 --> 00:56:00,523 You ready? 1138 00:56:01,649 --> 00:56:03,276 It was nice meeting you, Cliff. 1139 00:56:03,401 --> 00:56:04,361 Yeah. You too-- 1140 00:56:04,361 --> 00:56:05,862 Excuse me. 1141 00:56:05,862 --> 00:56:06,321 Yeah. 1142 00:56:06,321 --> 00:56:08,782 No, I took care of that. 1143 00:56:08,782 --> 00:56:10,992 I swear to God, you call me again like that. 1144 00:56:10,992 --> 00:56:12,911 No just make the deal. 1145 00:56:13,787 --> 00:56:15,580 Oh, I'm sorry. 1146 00:56:15,580 --> 00:56:16,623 What were you saying? 1147 00:56:17,374 --> 00:56:19,250 It was nice to meet you. 1148 00:56:19,250 --> 00:56:20,710 And by the way, thanks for helping Rachey out. 1149 00:56:20,710 --> 00:56:23,421 You know, I know those semen demons can be a handful, right? 1150 00:56:24,089 --> 00:56:24,547 Yeah. 1151 00:56:24,547 --> 00:56:26,925 And by the way, which one's your chariot? 1152 00:56:28,426 --> 00:56:29,386 You mean my car? 1153 00:56:29,386 --> 00:56:30,136 Exactly. 1154 00:56:30,136 --> 00:56:30,970 OK. 1155 00:56:30,970 --> 00:56:32,680 Yeah, well, you know, I actually walked 1156 00:56:32,680 --> 00:56:35,433 because it was such a nice day, so I'm going to go. 1157 00:56:35,767 --> 00:56:37,769 With a fucked up knee like that I call bullshit. 1158 00:56:37,769 --> 00:56:38,978 She calls shotgun. 1159 00:56:38,978 --> 00:56:39,896 Get in. 1160 00:56:40,355 --> 00:56:41,189 Huh. 1161 00:56:41,189 --> 00:56:42,273 Where's Manny? 1162 00:56:42,273 --> 00:56:43,149 Who? 1163 00:56:43,149 --> 00:56:44,359 Manny. 1164 00:56:44,359 --> 00:56:46,694 You can give me a handy later. Let's go. 1165 00:57:04,003 --> 00:57:07,424 Oh, what the fuck was that a fucking pterodactyl? 1166 00:57:08,716 --> 00:57:10,051 Uh-- Jeez-- 1167 00:57:39,581 --> 00:57:41,916 You are a total fuck up. 1168 00:57:41,916 --> 00:57:45,545 We tier of your resistance and your incompetence. 1169 00:57:46,129 --> 00:57:48,089 The end of days is upon us. 1170 00:57:48,089 --> 00:57:51,509 The spaceships are coming, and you shall learn your lesson! 1171 00:57:51,885 --> 00:57:53,553 No, no, no, no. 1172 00:57:53,553 --> 00:57:54,596 Not the hair! 1173 00:57:54,596 --> 00:57:55,889 Anything but the hair! 1174 00:57:55,972 --> 00:57:57,265 NO!!! 1175 00:58:03,188 --> 00:58:04,481 You're evicted. 1176 00:58:05,565 --> 00:58:06,357 It hurts me, bro. 1177 00:58:06,357 --> 00:58:07,192 I'm sorry. 1178 00:58:08,818 --> 00:58:10,069 Can I borrow your Titanic DVD? 1179 00:58:11,196 --> 00:58:12,405 Are you serious? 1180 00:58:12,405 --> 00:58:14,199 Smells good in here, man. 1181 00:58:14,199 --> 00:58:15,700 You still owe me Sleepless in Seattle. 1182 00:58:15,700 --> 00:58:16,493 That was yours? 1183 00:58:16,493 --> 00:58:17,285 Get out of here. 1184 00:58:17,285 --> 00:58:18,203 I gave that back to you. 1185 00:58:18,203 --> 00:58:18,870 You did not give that back to me. 1186 00:58:18,870 --> 00:58:19,704 Say it. I gave that back to you. 1187 00:58:19,704 --> 00:58:20,663 You did not give that back to me, dammit. 1188 00:58:20,663 --> 00:58:21,247 I'll get your DVD. 1189 00:58:21,247 --> 00:58:22,040 I'll get it back to you. 1190 00:58:22,040 --> 00:58:22,957 Yeah. 1191 00:58:44,479 --> 00:58:46,606 Harold, look-- 1192 00:58:46,648 --> 00:58:49,234 SURPRISE! 1193 00:59:00,995 --> 00:59:04,165 What are you doing here? 1194 00:59:04,332 --> 00:59:04,958 What do you mean? 1195 00:59:04,958 --> 00:59:06,417 What am I doing here? 1196 00:59:06,417 --> 00:59:08,461 I've come back to you. 1197 00:59:11,839 --> 00:59:13,258 Ummm... 1198 00:59:13,925 --> 00:59:16,719 Kim, uh-- you... 1199 00:59:17,512 --> 00:59:19,305 You should go. 1200 00:59:19,305 --> 00:59:20,598 Why? 1201 00:59:25,436 --> 00:59:27,480 Chris, I know that you think 1202 00:59:27,480 --> 00:59:31,859 I wasn't very nice to you in the past, but we were kids then. 1203 00:59:32,652 --> 00:59:34,904 And we are not kids anymore. 1204 00:59:35,697 --> 00:59:36,698 Are we? 1205 00:59:38,533 --> 00:59:39,200 No, we are not. 1206 00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:40,159 Oh, that. 1207 00:59:40,326 --> 00:59:41,411 That tickles. 1208 00:59:41,536 --> 00:59:44,080 By the way, Daddy said you can start at a hundred. 1209 00:59:44,497 --> 00:59:46,207 And hundred thousand dollars? 1210 00:59:46,207 --> 00:59:48,459 Uh, huh. 1211 00:59:48,459 --> 00:59:49,669 Oh, OK. 1212 00:59:49,669 --> 00:59:50,336 All right. Kim. 1213 00:59:50,336 --> 00:59:52,547 Kim. Kim, I need to know. 1214 00:59:52,547 --> 00:59:53,381 What? 1215 00:59:53,381 --> 00:59:54,507 Why now? 1216 00:59:54,507 --> 00:59:55,925 Why not now, I'm horny. 1217 00:59:56,384 --> 00:59:58,595 No. Why now? All of a sudden? 1218 00:59:58,636 --> 01:00:00,972 Do you want to be with me? 1219 01:00:00,972 --> 01:00:03,057 Chris, I've always loved you. 1220 01:00:03,224 --> 01:00:05,560 And when you got hurt, I was scared. 1221 01:00:11,733 --> 01:00:12,525 Jack? 1222 01:00:14,235 --> 01:00:16,779 Oh shit. Oh my God. 1223 01:00:18,531 --> 01:00:19,699 Holy pigeon shit. 1224 01:00:20,366 --> 01:00:22,118 Here's to two hearts becoming one. 1225 01:00:22,118 --> 01:00:23,911 My beloved Kimmy. 1226 01:00:23,911 --> 01:00:25,330 And Chris. Salute. 1227 01:00:25,330 --> 01:00:26,706 Cheers, sir. 1228 01:00:27,123 --> 01:00:30,168 Oh. Here we are princess, fat free... 1229 01:00:30,168 --> 01:00:31,836 Sugar free, gluten free. 1230 01:00:31,836 --> 01:00:33,212 Vegan lettuce cups. 1231 01:00:33,212 --> 01:00:35,173 Minus the rice and the oil. 1232 01:00:35,173 --> 01:00:38,593 Which I'm sure is much tastier than the chef always makes it. 1233 01:00:39,427 --> 01:00:40,720 Is that corn? 1234 01:00:44,557 --> 01:00:49,395 Yes. No, it is not. 1235 01:00:49,937 --> 01:00:51,856 It is. It is. 1236 01:00:51,856 --> 01:00:53,483 It is. Or it isn't? 1237 01:00:53,483 --> 01:00:55,735 It is if I'm being truthful about it. 1238 01:00:56,527 --> 01:00:57,153 It is corn. 1239 01:00:57,153 --> 01:00:57,737 It is. 1240 01:00:57,904 --> 01:00:58,529 It is corn. 1241 01:00:58,571 --> 01:00:58,821 Yeah. 1242 01:01:01,449 --> 01:01:02,950 Tha-- That's bad? 1243 01:01:11,042 --> 01:01:14,379 (Scream) 1244 01:01:16,214 --> 01:01:17,006 Daddy!? 1245 01:01:17,298 --> 01:01:18,049 Daddy!? 1246 01:01:20,677 --> 01:01:21,427 I'm so sorry. 1247 01:01:21,427 --> 01:01:24,305 I'm a horrible person, and I will go improve myself 1248 01:01:24,555 --> 01:01:25,014 around the corner. 1249 01:01:27,433 --> 01:01:30,728 How difficult is it for this restaurant 1250 01:01:30,895 --> 01:01:33,106 to get it right? 1251 01:01:41,030 --> 01:01:42,281 So as you can see 1252 01:01:42,281 --> 01:01:44,409 the living room is very spacious. 1253 01:01:45,326 --> 01:01:47,620 Well, I see that there's a pool, 1254 01:01:47,662 --> 01:01:50,206 but where's the tennis court? 1255 01:01:50,748 --> 01:01:53,710 We were told this property has a tennis court. 1256 01:01:54,127 --> 01:01:57,422 Where do we go when the servants are cleaning the house? 1257 01:01:59,590 --> 01:02:02,260 There's a ping pong table in the basement. 1258 01:02:02,260 --> 01:02:04,345 How dare you? 1259 01:02:04,345 --> 01:02:08,015 I have not been practicing my backhand for nothing. 1260 01:02:08,266 --> 01:02:10,768 Why is there so much furniture in this room? 1261 01:02:10,810 --> 01:02:13,146 Well, ma'am, sometimes we give prospective buyers 1262 01:02:13,146 --> 01:02:16,065 an idea of what it will look like once they move in and furnish the uh-- 1263 01:02:17,024 --> 01:02:19,777 It's pretty shitty trim who did it? 1264 01:02:23,322 --> 01:02:24,699 Jack? 1265 01:02:27,702 --> 01:02:28,870 Jack who? 1266 01:02:28,870 --> 01:02:30,621 Is he in the union? 1267 01:02:33,291 --> 01:02:36,544 He's speaking to you, dimwit. 1268 01:02:37,420 --> 01:02:38,588 I'm sorry. 1269 01:02:38,588 --> 01:02:40,965 I'm suffering from explosive diarrhea. 1270 01:02:41,674 --> 01:02:43,468 I will be right back. 1271 01:02:43,468 --> 01:02:44,427 Oh. 1272 01:02:44,427 --> 01:02:45,511 I suggest you take a shit! 1273 01:02:53,227 --> 01:02:54,187 Jack? 1274 01:02:55,146 --> 01:02:56,355 Call me Lonestar. 1275 01:02:56,355 --> 01:02:57,273 Lay low. 1276 01:02:57,940 --> 01:02:59,275 Lonestar? 1277 01:02:59,275 --> 01:02:59,817 Yeah. 1278 01:03:00,610 --> 01:03:02,487 That's what you want me to call you? 1279 01:03:02,487 --> 01:03:03,237 Yeah. 1280 01:03:03,446 --> 01:03:03,780 Lonestar? 1281 01:03:03,946 --> 01:03:04,447 Yeah. 1282 01:03:05,114 --> 01:03:06,115 That's what we're going with? 1283 01:03:06,115 --> 01:03:07,158 Absolutely. 1284 01:03:07,158 --> 01:03:09,285 Sure. What's up, Lonestar? 1285 01:03:09,285 --> 01:03:10,286 I can't let you do this. 1286 01:03:11,829 --> 01:03:12,413 Do what? 1287 01:03:12,413 --> 01:03:14,665 This. Look at you. 1288 01:03:15,583 --> 01:03:16,793 Look at me? 1289 01:03:16,876 --> 01:03:17,752 Jack-- 1290 01:03:17,752 --> 01:03:19,045 Lonestar. 1291 01:03:19,045 --> 01:03:22,465 Lonestar, look at you. 1292 01:03:23,216 --> 01:03:25,384 You don't think I look good as a brunette? 1293 01:03:25,551 --> 01:03:27,720 I think it brings out my eyes. 1294 01:03:28,429 --> 01:03:28,971 Jack. 1295 01:03:28,971 --> 01:03:29,680 Lonestar. 1296 01:03:29,764 --> 01:03:31,140 Lonestar! 1297 01:03:31,140 --> 01:03:32,767 You look insane. 1298 01:03:32,767 --> 01:03:35,019 This is insane. 1299 01:03:39,398 --> 01:03:40,316 Oh. 1300 01:03:40,608 --> 01:03:41,150 Bianca. 1301 01:03:41,984 --> 01:03:43,903 Bianca where are you? You got to see this. 1302 01:03:43,903 --> 01:03:45,029 You're not going to believe this, Bianca! 1303 01:03:45,905 --> 01:03:48,449 Bia-- Ohhh-- 1304 01:03:48,866 --> 01:03:51,035 Look, I'm happy right now, OK? 1305 01:03:51,410 --> 01:03:53,579 I've got my life together. 1306 01:03:53,579 --> 01:03:54,372 I've got money. 1307 01:03:54,372 --> 01:03:57,458 I can pay my rent for the first time, in like I don't even know how long. 1308 01:03:57,875 --> 01:03:59,502 Kim and I are happy. 1309 01:03:59,502 --> 01:04:00,545 Things are great. 1310 01:04:00,545 --> 01:04:01,796 Oh, everything's great, huh? 1311 01:04:01,796 --> 01:04:03,631 Oh, come on. Open your eyes. 1312 01:04:03,631 --> 01:04:05,383 Is this really what you want? 1313 01:04:05,383 --> 01:04:08,928 You are a foul loathsome young man. 1314 01:04:09,428 --> 01:04:10,763 Loathsome! 1315 01:04:10,763 --> 01:04:14,392 I'm going to call your office and file a complaint! 1316 01:04:17,562 --> 01:04:18,938 She had the nerve to say 1317 01:04:18,938 --> 01:04:22,942 this is a basketball expert that my uncle sent here to help us today. 1318 01:04:22,984 --> 01:04:24,694 I mean, it was so. 1319 01:04:24,694 --> 01:04:26,195 I looked like a fool, Jack. 1320 01:04:26,195 --> 01:04:27,029 Lonestar. 1321 01:04:27,029 --> 01:04:30,366 Lonestar, I completely misread the entire situation. 1322 01:04:30,408 --> 01:04:31,868 You didn't misread anything. 1323 01:04:31,868 --> 01:04:33,452 Her lame-o fiancee, Clay. 1324 01:04:33,452 --> 01:04:35,121 The guys been playing with her for years. 1325 01:04:35,121 --> 01:04:37,456 Don't you see Clay is Rachel's Kim. 1326 01:04:37,456 --> 01:04:40,835 The guy is always away on business trips, coming and going like the 1327 01:04:40,835 --> 01:04:41,294 breeze. 1328 01:04:41,294 --> 01:04:44,046 The poor girls been left feeling lonely, confused, and sad. 1329 01:04:45,089 --> 01:04:46,299 He's not the right guy for her. 1330 01:04:46,299 --> 01:04:47,592 We've all known that. 1331 01:04:47,592 --> 01:04:51,387 But Rachel didn't realize until she met you. 1332 01:04:51,387 --> 01:04:52,638 She said that? 1333 01:04:53,598 --> 01:04:54,348 Not exactly. 1334 01:04:54,348 --> 01:04:55,766 But I know that's what she thinks. 1335 01:04:55,766 --> 01:04:56,642 Jack-- 1336 01:04:56,642 --> 01:04:57,310 Lonestar. 1337 01:04:57,435 --> 01:04:58,477 Lonestar! 1338 01:04:58,811 --> 01:05:00,229 The cult tried to kill my dreams. 1339 01:05:00,229 --> 01:05:02,773 I'm never gonna let anybody ever do that again. 1340 01:05:02,773 --> 01:05:03,733 Don't give up on Rachel, buddy. 1341 01:05:03,733 --> 01:05:05,693 And more importantly, don't give up on yourself. 1342 01:05:07,194 --> 01:05:08,279 You deserve better than this. 1343 01:05:08,279 --> 01:05:09,614 This. 1344 01:05:09,739 --> 01:05:11,407 Sheesh! 1345 01:05:11,407 --> 01:05:13,576 Vile, vile, vile, vile! 1346 01:05:14,035 --> 01:05:16,078 This isn't your life. 1347 01:05:17,163 --> 01:05:19,874 This is somebody else's life. 1348 01:05:27,590 --> 01:05:30,801 Wow, Jack, this is freakishly good. 1349 01:05:31,344 --> 01:05:33,346 One good thing about being in a cult 1350 01:05:33,346 --> 01:05:35,806 planning to take over the world every day makes you very meticulous. 1351 01:05:35,806 --> 01:05:37,058 And a great strategist. 1352 01:05:37,058 --> 01:05:37,808 Apparently. 1353 01:05:37,808 --> 01:05:39,185 Oh, you know what else we should do? 1354 01:05:39,185 --> 01:05:42,146 We should do a whole grassroots social media marketing campaign. 1355 01:05:42,271 --> 01:05:44,023 All right, let's get to work! 1356 01:05:44,023 --> 01:05:47,318 And get a little more comfortable here. 1357 01:05:51,656 --> 01:05:52,573 Chris. 1358 01:05:54,075 --> 01:05:54,742 Kim. 1359 01:05:55,242 --> 01:05:57,370 Dude, she is hot. 1360 01:05:57,453 --> 01:05:59,538 You're not helping. 1361 01:05:59,914 --> 01:06:01,791 Alright I'll meet you out front. 1362 01:06:01,791 --> 01:06:02,750 Be strong. 1363 01:06:07,213 --> 01:06:08,047 Who was that? 1364 01:06:08,047 --> 01:06:09,423 And what were you two doing? 1365 01:06:09,423 --> 01:06:11,717 It's my friend, Lonestar. 1366 01:06:13,427 --> 01:06:14,845 Alright, Daddy's waiting, ok-- 1367 01:06:15,388 --> 01:06:16,597 Kim 1368 01:06:21,560 --> 01:06:22,353 I'm leaving. 1369 01:06:22,353 --> 01:06:22,770 I know. 1370 01:06:22,770 --> 01:06:24,689 We have to go. 1371 01:06:25,314 --> 01:06:27,858 No. I'm leaving alone. 1372 01:06:27,858 --> 01:06:30,027 We're not driving to Daddy's separately. 1373 01:06:30,027 --> 01:06:32,029 I'm not going to Daddy's. 1374 01:06:32,905 --> 01:06:34,573 Okay. This? Us? 1375 01:06:35,866 --> 01:06:36,909 It's over. 1376 01:06:36,909 --> 01:06:39,036 Your jokes aren't even funny. 1377 01:06:39,036 --> 01:06:40,746 Goodbye, Kim. 1378 01:06:42,039 --> 01:06:43,749 Oh, God is this you being emotional again? 1379 01:06:45,793 --> 01:06:47,920 Don't be so emotional, Chris. 1380 01:06:47,920 --> 01:06:49,839 You're an art major. 1381 01:06:49,839 --> 01:06:51,590 You're delusional. 1382 01:06:51,590 --> 01:06:52,842 Wake up. 1383 01:06:57,096 --> 01:06:58,723 You know what, Kim? 1384 01:06:59,140 --> 01:07:01,684 I'm a cancer, and we are emotional. 1385 01:07:02,101 --> 01:07:04,145 Art majoring, empathetic. 1386 01:07:04,937 --> 01:07:06,188 Fish painting. 1387 01:07:06,188 --> 01:07:08,190 Motherfuckers. 1388 01:07:08,190 --> 01:07:11,902 Have a great life. Oh. 1389 01:07:11,902 --> 01:07:15,823 And you wake up. 1390 01:07:28,085 --> 01:07:29,503 God, I feel amazing. 1391 01:07:29,503 --> 01:07:31,839 I feel like I could climb a mountain or something. 1392 01:07:32,298 --> 01:07:33,424 Why are we in a Prius? 1393 01:07:33,424 --> 01:07:35,134 I thought you had a Lamborghini? 1394 01:07:35,134 --> 01:07:37,261 Had to downsize for the mission. 1395 01:07:37,261 --> 01:07:37,887 Oh. 1396 01:07:38,929 --> 01:07:40,014 Wait, where are we going? 1397 01:07:40,014 --> 01:07:42,933 Page two. Step one, blue highlight. 1398 01:07:42,933 --> 01:07:44,018 Payback. 1399 01:07:44,226 --> 01:07:46,103 You want me to pretend to be your lawyer? 1400 01:07:46,103 --> 01:07:46,854 Oh, yes. 1401 01:07:46,854 --> 01:07:47,646 Oh, no. 1402 01:07:47,646 --> 01:07:49,398 Those fuckers took 6 million from me. 1403 01:07:49,398 --> 01:07:50,983 We need that money to save the gym. 1404 01:07:50,983 --> 01:07:55,237 You gave a cult $6 million dollars?! Are you out of your mind? 1405 01:07:55,446 --> 01:07:56,197 Listen. 1406 01:07:56,197 --> 01:07:58,574 I was a light-being investing in the star Arcturus. 1407 01:07:59,366 --> 01:08:00,826 Plus, they told me it was a write-off. 1408 01:08:00,826 --> 01:08:02,536 Look, Jack, I'm a-- Lonestar. 1409 01:08:02,536 --> 01:08:04,246 Lonestar. Look, I can't do this. I'm sorry. 1410 01:08:04,246 --> 01:08:04,872 It's too much. 1411 01:08:04,872 --> 01:08:05,956 I'm sorry. I can't. 1412 01:08:05,956 --> 01:08:07,666 We have all the power. 1413 01:08:07,666 --> 01:08:08,918 Just play the role. 1414 01:08:08,918 --> 01:08:10,336 It will be fine. 1415 01:08:12,254 --> 01:08:14,256 I did take an acting class back in college. 1416 01:08:14,548 --> 01:08:15,508 Perfect. 1417 01:08:15,758 --> 01:08:16,717 What do I call myself? 1418 01:08:16,717 --> 01:08:19,095 I don't want them knowing my real name. 1419 01:08:19,929 --> 01:08:20,346 Ronald. 1420 01:08:20,346 --> 01:08:22,556 Ronald McDonald, son. 1421 01:08:28,104 --> 01:08:30,231 OK, you ready? 1422 01:08:30,564 --> 01:08:32,525 What are we doing in a dentist's office? 1423 01:08:33,109 --> 01:08:33,943 Think about it. 1424 01:08:33,943 --> 01:08:35,444 That's how they get you. 1425 01:08:35,444 --> 01:08:38,823 Everybody needs to get their teeth cleaned. 1426 01:08:54,839 --> 01:08:55,631 Ron? 1427 01:09:03,222 --> 01:09:04,682 Yes, that's me. 1428 01:09:04,682 --> 01:09:05,933 Uhh-- Ron. 1429 01:09:55,107 --> 01:09:56,192 Arcturian Lifestyles. 1430 01:09:56,192 --> 01:09:57,902 This is Venus, how can I help you? 1431 01:10:18,088 --> 01:10:20,299 Have a seat. 1432 01:10:28,390 --> 01:10:30,517 Hello, benevolent leader. 1433 01:10:30,517 --> 01:10:32,645 You dare bring an outsider in here, dipshit. 1434 01:10:33,145 --> 01:10:34,480 I just want to say that I don't. 1435 01:10:34,480 --> 01:10:35,397 I don't judge. 1436 01:10:35,397 --> 01:10:37,900 I don't believe in judging others based on their personal views. 1437 01:10:38,817 --> 01:10:42,029 I actually, I used to have a shaved head back when I swam 1438 01:10:42,321 --> 01:10:45,074 made me more, more aerodynamic. 1439 01:10:45,074 --> 01:10:47,618 This right here is my lawyer. 1440 01:10:47,910 --> 01:10:49,078 Your worst nightmare. 1441 01:10:50,871 --> 01:10:55,334 Hey, uh-- I'm-- His lawyer. 1442 01:10:56,335 --> 01:10:58,087 My name is 1443 01:10:58,545 --> 01:11:00,673 Ronald... McDonald... 1444 01:11:02,591 --> 01:11:03,425 son... 1445 01:11:03,884 --> 01:11:06,095 I mostly do 1446 01:11:06,345 --> 01:11:08,806 pro bono work downtown. 1447 01:11:10,099 --> 01:11:12,017 Just pretend he's Kim. 1448 01:11:21,068 --> 01:11:22,027 Alright, motherfucker. 1449 01:11:22,987 --> 01:11:26,115 I want you to listen, and I want you to listen really good. 1450 01:11:27,032 --> 01:11:30,869 Your organization owes my client... 1451 01:11:30,911 --> 01:11:33,706 Upwards of 6 million dollars! 1452 01:11:34,707 --> 01:11:37,459 My client has suffered from anxiety. 1453 01:11:37,960 --> 01:11:41,046 Depression, erectile dysfunction! 1454 01:11:41,171 --> 01:11:43,173 I've got that last problem under control-- 1455 01:11:43,173 --> 01:11:44,174 And I will not stop 1456 01:11:44,383 --> 01:11:47,511 until justice has been upheld 1457 01:11:47,511 --> 01:11:50,055 my bald friends! 1458 01:11:51,015 --> 01:11:55,060 Are you dentists familiar with the iPhone audio recorder app? 1459 01:11:56,937 --> 01:11:58,480 Well, lucky for me, my 1460 01:11:58,480 --> 01:12:01,108 client was during your little routine kidnapping. 1461 01:12:01,608 --> 01:12:03,944 You remember that, do you, Chuckles? 1462 01:12:03,944 --> 01:12:05,362 Because I do... 1463 01:12:05,362 --> 01:12:08,449 behold evidence A! 1464 01:12:16,623 --> 01:12:18,500 Can you just-- Just give it to me. 1465 01:12:18,876 --> 01:12:19,501 Can you just give it to me? 1466 01:12:20,753 --> 01:12:21,378 Relax. 1467 01:12:22,087 --> 01:12:23,922 BEHOLD EVIDENCE A! 1468 01:12:27,760 --> 01:12:29,094 No, no. 1469 01:12:29,094 --> 01:12:29,595 No, no, no. 1470 01:12:29,595 --> 01:12:32,097 Not the hair anything but the hair! No!!!!! 1471 01:12:32,097 --> 01:12:34,933 goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, 1472 01:12:35,100 --> 01:12:37,978 goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, 1473 01:12:38,103 --> 01:12:42,566 goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat, goat! 1474 01:12:42,566 --> 01:12:44,443 Silence! Arcturians! 1475 01:12:45,152 --> 01:12:47,279 Fuck this goat... on the floor! 1476 01:12:47,279 --> 01:12:48,572 (Goat noises) 1477 01:12:48,572 --> 01:12:49,031 Oh yeah! 1478 01:12:49,031 --> 01:12:54,995 (Goat noises) 1479 01:12:55,537 --> 01:12:56,705 Oh, and by the way, 1480 01:12:56,705 --> 01:12:59,416 that is not the only copy of that recording. 1481 01:13:00,042 --> 01:13:03,087 I've got that shit on my iCloud. 1482 01:13:04,463 --> 01:13:08,175 $6,000. 1483 01:13:10,636 --> 01:13:13,013 Yeah, baby! Boom! 1484 01:13:13,013 --> 01:13:15,224 Take that to the bank dipshits! 1485 01:13:15,766 --> 01:13:18,352 For the record, I didn't fuck that goat. 1486 01:13:18,769 --> 01:13:21,522 Oh, and Jack, please, don't try to play matchmaker with Rachel. 1487 01:13:21,522 --> 01:13:22,856 She's engaged. 1488 01:13:22,856 --> 01:13:23,941 Not anymore. 1489 01:13:30,906 --> 01:13:33,242 It's like the band's back together. Huh? 1490 01:13:37,121 --> 01:13:39,248 Hey, are you sure you invited her? 1491 01:13:40,332 --> 01:13:42,418 Yes, I'm sure. Relax. 1492 01:13:42,459 --> 01:13:43,252 Are you positive? 1493 01:13:44,002 --> 01:13:44,920 Trust me. 1494 01:13:45,421 --> 01:13:46,046 Hey! 1495 01:13:46,046 --> 01:13:47,923 Oh, yes. 1496 01:13:47,923 --> 01:13:49,007 Now that works. 1497 01:13:49,007 --> 01:13:51,009 That suits that suits you. 1498 01:13:51,009 --> 01:13:53,220 Speaking of bands, Jack's hair? 1499 01:13:53,220 --> 01:13:55,514 Fucking perfect. Look at it. 1500 01:13:55,514 --> 01:13:59,393 I just hope Bon Jovi has good news because we couldn't find anywhere 1501 01:13:59,393 --> 01:14:00,185 that was hiring. 1502 01:14:00,185 --> 01:14:02,604 And we're saving up for a Kia. 1503 01:14:02,604 --> 01:14:04,815 That's a great vehicle. 1504 01:14:04,815 --> 01:14:05,524 Well, listen, I got to rally the troops. 1505 01:14:05,524 --> 01:14:06,650 I'll talk more in a little bit, okay? 1506 01:14:06,650 --> 01:14:07,985 Alright. 1507 01:14:08,652 --> 01:14:09,820 Blondes way better. 1508 01:14:09,820 --> 01:14:10,904 Oh, yeah. 1509 01:14:12,906 --> 01:14:13,699 Hey. 1510 01:14:13,824 --> 01:14:14,741 Hey. 1511 01:14:14,741 --> 01:14:16,118 How are ya? 1512 01:14:16,118 --> 01:14:16,952 Great. 1513 01:14:16,952 --> 01:14:18,370 Thanks for coming. 1514 01:14:18,370 --> 01:14:21,665 Of course. Gotta support my Uncle, right? 1515 01:14:22,458 --> 01:14:23,250 Right. 1516 01:14:23,625 --> 01:14:26,462 Look, I'm sorry for everything. 1517 01:14:26,503 --> 01:14:28,422 No, no, don't be sorry. 1518 01:14:28,422 --> 01:14:30,799 Water under the bridge. 1519 01:14:30,883 --> 01:14:32,259 OK, everyone 1520 01:14:33,051 --> 01:14:35,137 welcome back, everybody. 1521 01:14:35,679 --> 01:14:38,432 I'd just like to say it's fantastic to see you 1522 01:14:38,432 --> 01:14:39,850 all back in your uniform's again. 1523 01:14:39,850 --> 01:14:42,603 And I know that we've had some bumps in the road. 1524 01:14:42,644 --> 01:14:46,523 We've come up with a three part plan, Todd, hand out the binders. 1525 01:14:49,276 --> 01:14:51,487 Now, when I escaped, 1526 01:14:52,362 --> 01:14:55,449 I knew that I would have to face the leader once more. 1527 01:14:55,532 --> 01:14:56,450 Escaped? 1528 01:14:56,450 --> 01:14:57,701 The leader? 1529 01:15:02,748 --> 01:15:03,290 That's right-- 1530 01:15:03,290 --> 01:15:07,753 I was in a cult for 20 years, 1531 01:15:08,921 --> 01:15:10,631 and I'm not ashamed, 1532 01:15:10,923 --> 01:15:12,758 and I'm not hiding anymore. 1533 01:15:12,758 --> 01:15:15,135 In fact, I'm not only fighting back 1534 01:15:15,469 --> 01:15:19,306 but I'm taking those mind sucking, alien loving parasites down. 1535 01:15:19,515 --> 01:15:25,896 I won't stop until I retrieve the $5,994,000 that they still owe me. 1536 01:15:26,146 --> 01:15:28,190 They will be begging me for mercy. 1537 01:15:28,315 --> 01:15:29,816 Across the universe. 1538 01:15:29,816 --> 01:15:33,612 The name Jack Guy will cause fear in the hearts of every Arcturian! 1539 01:15:36,573 --> 01:15:37,491 Yes-- Bobby. 1540 01:15:37,491 --> 01:15:40,494 So you want us to help you take the cult down 1541 01:15:40,494 --> 01:15:43,330 to get your money back to save this gym? 1542 01:15:44,248 --> 01:15:46,542 No, no, not at all. I was just venting. 1543 01:15:46,959 --> 01:15:48,877 It's a really important part of the healing process. 1544 01:15:48,877 --> 01:15:50,295 My therapist says it's vital. 1545 01:15:51,880 --> 01:15:54,675 I think what Jack is trying to say is that 1546 01:15:55,300 --> 01:15:58,512 after my injury, I started to play the victim in life, 1547 01:15:58,512 --> 01:16:03,016 and I was acting as if life robbed me of something that I deserved. 1548 01:16:04,101 --> 01:16:05,227 And I quit 1549 01:16:05,811 --> 01:16:07,187 on myself. 1550 01:16:07,771 --> 01:16:10,190 But I'm tired of sitting on the sideline. 1551 01:16:10,983 --> 01:16:14,069 I'm ready to get back in the game, and I'm ready to play some ball. 1552 01:16:14,069 --> 01:16:16,989 And what I want to know is, who wants to play some ball? 1553 01:16:18,073 --> 01:16:19,157 Bobby? Yes. 1554 01:16:19,157 --> 01:16:23,328 So you want us to join a basketball league? 1555 01:16:25,414 --> 01:16:25,747 No. 1556 01:16:25,831 --> 01:16:26,164 No. 1557 01:16:27,165 --> 01:16:29,543 I think what Chris and Jack 1558 01:16:29,543 --> 01:16:33,130 are trying to say is if we work as a team, 1559 01:16:33,922 --> 01:16:37,843 we could turn dumbbells business around and save everyone's job. 1560 01:16:38,468 --> 01:16:41,179 Ohhh. 1561 01:16:41,179 --> 01:16:41,972 Isn’t that what we said? 1562 01:17:15,756 --> 01:17:16,965 Perfect. 1563 01:17:16,965 --> 01:17:17,966 Guys! 1564 01:20:22,984 --> 01:20:23,527 Hey. 1565 01:20:23,527 --> 01:20:24,110 Hi. 1566 01:20:24,402 --> 01:20:25,153 Wow. You look 1567 01:20:26,363 --> 01:20:27,489 beautiful. 1568 01:20:27,989 --> 01:20:29,241 Thank you. 1569 01:20:29,324 --> 01:20:31,284 Can I steal her for a minute? 1570 01:20:31,993 --> 01:20:33,328 Sure. 1571 01:20:33,662 --> 01:20:35,455 Thank you, Missy. 1572 01:20:36,998 --> 01:20:39,292 Hey. Any bats in the cave? 1573 01:20:40,252 --> 01:20:42,254 You're clear. 1574 01:20:42,254 --> 01:20:44,297 You know, I'm really glad you and I teamed up Chris-- 1575 01:20:44,297 --> 01:20:46,716 Holy Valkyrie on Blu ray. Is that Tom Cruise? 1576 01:20:46,716 --> 01:20:50,679 Sometimes you just got to say, what the fuck make your move. 1577 01:20:51,054 --> 01:20:54,015 Woo, woo! 1578 01:20:54,015 --> 01:20:56,393 No, actually, that is not Tom Cruise. 1579 01:20:56,393 --> 01:20:58,061 That is Tom Cruise. 1580 01:20:58,061 --> 01:21:00,397 The truth. It doesn't matter 1581 01:21:00,397 --> 01:21:02,607 perception is reality. 1582 01:21:04,276 --> 01:21:06,194 Help me help you. 1583 01:21:06,194 --> 01:21:07,153 Help me. 1584 01:21:07,153 --> 01:21:08,488 Help you help me. 1585 01:21:08,488 --> 01:21:10,448 Help you. 1586 01:21:11,199 --> 01:21:11,992 Guys. 1587 01:21:11,992 --> 01:21:14,244 A real life Hollywood producer just gave me his card. 1588 01:21:14,452 --> 01:21:16,788 Said I had a dynamic look and wants to make me a star. 1589 01:21:17,205 --> 01:21:18,290 Awesome. 1590 01:21:18,290 --> 01:21:19,708 Congrats buddy. 1591 01:21:19,708 --> 01:21:20,542 Talk to you soon. 1592 01:21:20,542 --> 01:21:23,086 He reminds me of a young Macaulay Culkin. 1593 01:21:23,086 --> 01:21:26,923 OK, so I haven't told Dre, but, we're having twins! 1594 01:21:26,923 --> 01:21:29,759 What?! Oh my God, congratulations! 1595 01:21:29,759 --> 01:21:31,011 Thank you so much I'm so excited. 1596 01:21:31,011 --> 01:21:33,722 You're gonna make the cutest mom. 1597 01:21:33,722 --> 01:21:36,725 It's kind of crazy to think that I wanted to quit not even a month ago. 1598 01:21:37,058 --> 01:21:39,102 Yeah, we all want to quit at one time or another. 1599 01:21:39,853 --> 01:21:42,188 Important thing is to hang in the game because tomorrow 1600 01:21:42,188 --> 01:21:44,024 always bring another surprise. 1601 01:21:45,066 --> 01:21:46,985 What do you think about my wig? 1602 01:21:46,985 --> 01:21:49,696 It looks exactly like your real hair. 1603 01:21:49,779 --> 01:21:51,406 It's kind of weird. 1604 01:21:51,406 --> 01:21:53,617 Speaking of surprises, that is for you. 1605 01:21:53,617 --> 01:21:54,576 What's this? 1606 01:21:54,743 --> 01:21:57,162 I was able to salvage the footage from the reality show. 1607 01:21:57,495 --> 01:21:59,080 I edited it together, 1608 01:21:59,080 --> 01:22:02,125 added effects cool transitions, graphics, the whole nine. 1609 01:22:02,709 --> 01:22:05,295 Wow. How'd you learn to do that? 1610 01:22:05,295 --> 01:22:07,088 I was an art major. 1611 01:22:07,213 --> 01:22:08,381 Very cool. 1612 01:22:10,383 --> 01:22:12,844 Did you know we already have 42 new members. 1613 01:22:13,345 --> 01:22:15,055 Are any of them rich men? 1614 01:22:15,305 --> 01:22:16,431 Gizell, don't be a slut. 1615 01:22:20,185 --> 01:22:21,102 Well, 1616 01:22:21,227 --> 01:22:23,438 things are looking pretty good right now, huh Todd? 1617 01:22:23,647 --> 01:22:24,314 Yeah. 1618 01:22:24,648 --> 01:22:26,858 You guys did a really good job at this place. 1619 01:22:26,858 --> 01:22:29,235 My dad couldn't do this. He said I suck. 1620 01:22:29,444 --> 01:22:30,987 He sucks. 1621 01:22:35,992 --> 01:22:39,162 I am sorry to interrupt, Buzz, but, if I may cut in? 1622 01:22:39,579 --> 01:22:43,208 Well, I was just going to ask her to marry me, but it wouldn't work out. 1623 01:22:43,458 --> 01:22:45,085 Be free. 1624 01:22:53,927 --> 01:22:54,886 Shall we? 1625 01:22:54,886 --> 01:22:56,346 I'm all yours. 1626 01:22:58,056 --> 01:23:02,602 Well, congratulations on a very, very successful party. 1627 01:23:03,103 --> 01:23:05,522 You boys sure have come a long way. 1628 01:23:05,522 --> 01:23:06,398 Thank you. 1629 01:23:06,398 --> 01:23:08,233 Well, we've been doing a lot of according. 1630 01:23:09,526 --> 01:23:10,986 According? 1631 01:23:11,236 --> 01:23:13,530 I believe it was Sigmund Freud 1632 01:23:13,530 --> 01:23:16,866 who said man should not strive to eliminate his complexes. 1633 01:23:17,325 --> 01:23:22,372 But to get into accord with them for they legitimately direct his conduct... 1634 01:23:22,455 --> 01:23:23,623 ...in the world. 1635 01:23:24,749 --> 01:23:27,085 Wow. I am impressed. 1636 01:23:28,003 --> 01:23:28,837 You like that? 1637 01:23:28,837 --> 01:23:29,254 Yeah-- 1638 01:23:29,254 --> 01:23:30,463 You didn't see that one coming, did ya? 1639 01:23:30,463 --> 01:23:31,756 I did not. 1640 01:23:31,756 --> 01:23:33,091 I have you to thank. 1641 01:23:33,508 --> 01:23:34,300 For what? 1642 01:23:35,468 --> 01:23:36,094 For everything. 1643 01:23:38,263 --> 01:23:40,890 Are you getting emotional on me? 1644 01:23:41,975 --> 01:23:42,642 I'm sorry. 1645 01:23:42,642 --> 01:23:44,394 That's, that's lame, isn’t it? 1646 01:23:44,769 --> 01:23:46,688 Are you kidding me? 1647 01:23:47,564 --> 01:23:50,650 I don't know one girl who wouldn't love a man 1648 01:23:51,234 --> 01:23:54,279 who's in touch with their feelings... 1649 01:23:55,488 --> 01:23:57,657 And I wanted to say... 1650 01:23:57,866 --> 01:23:58,950 Thank you. 1651 01:24:00,118 --> 01:24:01,953 For respecting my boundaries. 1652 01:24:03,246 --> 01:24:07,333 I love respecting your boundaries. 1653 01:24:16,092 --> 01:24:19,220 My pursuit of happiness wasn't about finding somebody new to love. 1654 01:24:19,220 --> 01:24:21,056 It was about learning how to love myself again. 1655 01:24:21,056 --> 01:24:23,683 We've all got our demons. But with a good support system. 1656 01:24:23,683 --> 01:24:25,101 It's amazing what can happen. 1657 01:24:25,101 --> 01:24:31,524 Look who's got it all on camera you adorable love birds. This is perfect. 1658 01:24:31,524 --> 01:24:32,233 Chris! 1659 01:24:32,233 --> 01:24:34,486 They’re playing your DVD on the projector everyone loves it. 1660 01:24:34,486 --> 01:24:35,320 You gotta come check it out. 1661 01:24:36,613 --> 01:24:39,032 Sorry for C-blocking man. 1662 01:25:38,216 --> 01:25:38,842 Hey, Jack. 1663 01:25:39,425 --> 01:25:40,718 Hey, the Maloofs! 1664 01:25:40,718 --> 01:25:42,679 You guys made it. Gavin, Joe, how are you guys doing? 1665 01:25:43,304 --> 01:25:43,930 Fine. 1666 01:25:44,139 --> 01:25:46,391 Fabio told us you're having a party. 1667 01:25:46,391 --> 01:25:48,226 I'm glad you guys can make you have some fun? 1668 01:25:48,226 --> 01:25:50,770 Yeah, we're having fun-- Unfortunately, we're in a big rush. 1669 01:25:50,895 --> 01:25:52,897 Our helicopters picking us up in five. 1670 01:25:53,106 --> 01:25:54,691 We came here to pitch something. 1671 01:25:54,691 --> 01:25:56,651 We're branching out of Vegas, now. 1672 01:25:56,651 --> 01:25:58,695 We're producing television content, 1673 01:25:58,736 --> 01:26:00,321 and we were looking at the footage over here 1674 01:26:00,321 --> 01:26:01,156 and thought that the-- 1675 01:26:01,156 --> 01:26:02,365 The premise rocks. 1676 01:26:02,740 --> 01:26:03,867 We love the name. 1677 01:26:03,867 --> 01:26:06,536 Could be a reality show. Or I'm thinking of even franchising 1678 01:26:07,704 --> 01:26:09,455 it. Let's talk more on Monday we'll discuss the details. 1679 01:26:09,455 --> 01:26:11,916 Abso-Maloofley! 1680 01:26:11,916 --> 01:26:13,168 All right. OK. 1681 01:26:13,168 --> 01:26:13,668 OK, guys. 1682 01:26:13,668 --> 01:26:14,294 Alright, Jack. 1683 01:26:14,294 --> 01:26:16,212 Sorry you got to leave. 1684 01:26:16,212 --> 01:26:18,089 So do I believe in second chances? 1685 01:26:18,089 --> 01:26:20,175 Hell, I believe in third and fourth chances. 1686 01:26:20,175 --> 01:26:23,928 Jack Guy credited my video with landing the franchise deal, 1687 01:26:24,053 --> 01:26:27,765 so he gave me equity part ownership of Dumbbells, the brand. 1688 01:26:28,266 --> 01:26:32,437 In life, we get multiple chances, so don't beat yourself up 1689 01:26:32,812 --> 01:26:36,065 if a career didn't work out or if you were in a failed relationship, 1690 01:26:36,482 --> 01:26:39,110 or if you were in a cult that believed in the alien takeover. 1691 01:26:39,277 --> 01:26:41,988 The point is, perception is reality, 1692 01:26:42,238 --> 01:26:44,407 and it's never too late to reinvent yourself. 1693 01:26:45,950 --> 01:26:48,119 And Jack Guy was right. 1694 01:26:48,119 --> 01:26:50,246 Sometimes you do need to lose everything you think 1695 01:26:50,288 --> 01:26:53,708 you want to discover who it is that you actually are. 1696 01:26:55,710 --> 01:26:57,378 And I must admit, 1697 01:26:57,378 --> 01:26:59,505 it feels really good to say 1698 01:27:00,548 --> 01:27:02,842 this is my life. 1699 01:27:03,968 --> 01:27:05,970 And even more importantly... 1700 01:27:07,055 --> 01:27:08,556 NO MOHAWK!