1 00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:11,184 Liyah: I got a call just like any other call. 2 00:00:11,184 --> 00:00:14,535 You know, a dude hit me up, like, "What's up, Ma? 3 00:00:14,535 --> 00:00:16,624 How are you? What you up to? 4 00:00:16,624 --> 00:00:18,322 - What's your rates? - [soft guitar music playing] 5 00:00:18,626 --> 00:00:20,237 Liyah: How much you charge? Da, da, da." 6 00:00:20,237 --> 00:00:21,803 So I told him, "What you trying to do?" 7 00:00:21,803 --> 00:00:23,588 "Oh, I wanna get fucked," "Okay," boom. 8 00:00:24,023 --> 00:00:25,851 So he comes over, 9 00:00:26,547 --> 00:00:28,419 everything is cool, everything is normal, 10 00:00:28,419 --> 00:00:29,724 everything was going great, you know? 11 00:00:29,724 --> 00:00:31,639 I just... I don't expect anything of it. 12 00:00:31,639 --> 00:00:33,076 Next thing you know, he's like, 13 00:00:33,076 --> 00:00:34,773 "Can I use your bathroom real quick?" 14 00:00:35,687 --> 00:00:37,515 I said, "Okay sure, go ahead." 15 00:00:37,515 --> 00:00:39,604 So I guess he said he needs to freshen up, 16 00:00:39,604 --> 00:00:40,779 or wash his dick or whatever. 17 00:00:41,127 --> 00:00:42,650 So I'm like, "nigga, your dick should've been washed 18 00:00:42,650 --> 00:00:43,912 before you came in this bitch." 19 00:00:43,912 --> 00:00:46,176 So just as I'm about to pull down his pants, 20 00:00:46,828 --> 00:00:48,091 he sits on the bed, 21 00:00:49,135 --> 00:00:51,137 and I'm right here in front 22 00:00:51,137 --> 00:00:53,313 in missionary position on my knees, 23 00:00:53,313 --> 00:00:54,445 like, you know, getting down, 24 00:00:54,793 --> 00:00:56,664 about to suck his dick, and I pull down his pants. 25 00:00:56,925 --> 00:00:58,536 Bitch, and I notice 26 00:00:59,667 --> 00:01:02,409 there is a big-ass motherfucking pistol, bitch. 27 00:01:02,409 --> 00:01:04,585 A big-ass glock next to him. 28 00:01:06,370 --> 00:01:09,199 And I gag, like, bitch, like honestly, 29 00:01:10,156 --> 00:01:12,419 this was one of the most scariest moments of my life 30 00:01:12,419 --> 00:01:15,205 doing sex work, because I didn't know what to expect. 31 00:01:15,770 --> 00:01:17,685 I didn't know what was gonna happen. 32 00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,819 My first instinct was, "Bitch, grab the gun." 33 00:01:20,819 --> 00:01:21,950 [ominous music playing] 34 00:01:22,255 --> 00:01:24,127 That was my first instinct. And I know people 35 00:01:24,127 --> 00:01:26,041 just like, "Bitch, that's crazy as hell. 36 00:01:26,041 --> 00:01:27,695 Why would you do some shit like that?" 37 00:01:28,695 --> 00:01:30,437 Bitch, the way that I thought was, 38 00:01:31,046 --> 00:01:32,744 it's either his life or mine. 39 00:01:32,744 --> 00:01:37,531 So I grabbed the nigga's gun and he was like, 40 00:01:37,531 --> 00:01:39,445 "What are you doing, what are you doing?" 41 00:01:39,445 --> 00:01:41,056 As he's walking towards me, 42 00:01:41,969 --> 00:01:44,103 [gun clicking] 43 00:01:44,973 --> 00:01:46,627 [man panting] 44 00:01:46,975 --> 00:01:49,064 I click it, I click the gun, but I notice 45 00:01:49,064 --> 00:01:50,891 it's not going off, bitch. So I'm like, 46 00:01:50,891 --> 00:01:52,372 "Bitch, what the fuck is going on, hoe?" 47 00:01:52,372 --> 00:01:54,374 Like, I'm just like, I'm just clicking this gun, 48 00:01:54,374 --> 00:01:56,246 like, trying to get it to go off, like, 49 00:01:56,246 --> 00:01:58,204 I'm thinking, I aimed the gun at this nigga head. 50 00:01:58,204 --> 00:01:59,292 Like, I was bold-bold, 51 00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:01,120 I don't know what the fuck I was thinking. 52 00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:02,730 It didn't go off. 53 00:02:03,078 --> 00:02:04,558 Mind you, I've never shot a gun in my life, 54 00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:06,212 so I don't know how this shit works, like, 55 00:02:06,647 --> 00:02:07,692 so I was like, "Damn." 56 00:02:07,996 --> 00:02:11,043 So at this point he gets scared and he feel like, 57 00:02:11,043 --> 00:02:12,479 "Oh, this bitch tryna kill me." 58 00:02:12,784 --> 00:02:15,352 So he charges at me... 59 00:02:15,352 --> 00:02:16,744 [tense funk music playing] 60 00:02:16,744 --> 00:02:18,833 ...and we start wrestling over the gun. 61 00:02:19,225 --> 00:02:20,792 we're tussling over the gun 62 00:02:21,967 --> 00:02:26,145 and we fucking knocking shit over, bitch. 63 00:02:26,145 --> 00:02:27,712 Dentin' holes in the wall. 64 00:02:28,191 --> 00:02:32,151 We literally fought from here down to the hallway, 65 00:02:33,674 --> 00:02:36,590 and nigga, we started tumbling down the stairs together, 66 00:02:37,112 --> 00:02:38,375 fighting over this damn gun. 67 00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:40,899 So I ran outside by my neighbor's car. 68 00:02:41,291 --> 00:02:42,553 My neighbor's looking at me, like, 69 00:02:42,553 --> 00:02:44,032 "Bitch, what the fuck is going on, bitch? 70 00:02:44,032 --> 00:02:45,251 Don't put me in your shit. 71 00:02:45,251 --> 00:02:46,557 I don't have nothing to do with it, hoe." 72 00:02:47,035 --> 00:02:49,255 He actually end up just getting in the car, 73 00:02:50,213 --> 00:02:52,954 and as he's like coming around, I'm still ducking 74 00:02:52,954 --> 00:02:55,218 because I don't want him to do a drive-by on me. 75 00:02:55,696 --> 00:02:58,395 So I'm still kinda, like, getting low and like ducking. 76 00:02:58,395 --> 00:03:00,310 But he ends up just speeding off. 77 00:03:00,310 --> 00:03:03,313 He just sped off. So I was like, "Thank God, like, bitch, 78 00:03:03,313 --> 00:03:06,881 this is over, I survived this." Bitch I was like, "I'm done. 79 00:03:07,360 --> 00:03:08,535 I'm done with this shit, hoe. 80 00:03:08,535 --> 00:03:10,624 I'm never doing sex work again in my life." 81 00:03:10,624 --> 00:03:12,974 So, he gave me a... he sent me a text, 82 00:03:13,540 --> 00:03:15,020 "You ruined my night, 83 00:03:15,455 --> 00:03:18,415 I'm sore, I'm limping, my leg is broke. 84 00:03:18,415 --> 00:03:21,156 I'm a rapper in Atlanta, I'm known, 85 00:03:21,156 --> 00:03:24,421 and I carry around my strap with me because, you know, 86 00:03:24,421 --> 00:03:26,945 it be girls, you know, trans girls in the community 87 00:03:26,945 --> 00:03:28,599 that be setting me up and trying to rob me." 88 00:03:28,599 --> 00:03:32,255 I was like, "So did you still wanna do this?" 89 00:03:32,255 --> 00:03:33,778 - [vinyl scratching] - [Liyah chuckles] 90 00:03:33,778 --> 00:03:36,563 He introduced himself again. I introduced myself again, 91 00:03:36,563 --> 00:03:39,523 and we decided to fuck. 92 00:03:39,523 --> 00:03:41,438 [jazz-funk music playing] 93 00:03:41,699 --> 00:03:43,614 ♪ I play the street life ♪ 94 00:03:43,918 --> 00:03:46,138 ♪ Because there's no place I can go ♪ 95 00:03:46,573 --> 00:03:50,621 ♪ Street life, it's the only life I know ♪ 96 00:03:51,056 --> 00:03:52,231 ♪ Street life ♪ 97 00:03:52,666 --> 00:03:55,321 ♪ And there's a thousand parts to play ♪ 98 00:03:55,321 --> 00:03:58,890 ♪ Street life, until you play your life away ♪ 99 00:03:59,412 --> 00:04:03,503 ♪ You let the people see just who you wanna be ♪ 100 00:04:03,982 --> 00:04:07,594 ♪ And every night you shine just like a superstar ♪ 101 00:04:07,986 --> 00:04:09,770 ♪ The type of life that's played ♪ 102 00:04:10,336 --> 00:04:11,903 ♪ A ten-cent masquerade ♪ 103 00:04:12,425 --> 00:04:14,340 ♪ You dress, you walk, you talk ♪ 104 00:04:14,340 --> 00:04:16,081 ♪ You're who you think you are ♪ 105 00:04:16,646 --> 00:04:20,519 ♪ Street life, you can run away from time ♪ 106 00:04:20,519 --> 00:04:24,698 ♪ Street life, for a nickel or a dime ♪ 107 00:04:25,395 --> 00:04:28,920 ♪ Street life, but you better not get old ♪ 108 00:04:29,486 --> 00:04:33,054 ♪ Street life, or you're gonna feel the cold ♪ 109 00:04:33,533 --> 00:04:35,579 ♪ There's always love for sale ♪ 110 00:04:35,579 --> 00:04:37,320 ♪ A grown-up fairytale 111 00:04:37,885 --> 00:04:41,498 ♪ Prince Charming always smiles behind a silver spoon ♪ 112 00:04:41,976 --> 00:04:46,111 ♪ And if you keep it young, your song is always sung ♪ 113 00:04:46,111 --> 00:04:49,941 ♪ Your love will pay your way beneath the silver moon ♪ 114 00:04:50,637 --> 00:04:52,335 ♪ Street life 115 00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:56,339 ♪ Street life 116 00:04:59,298 --> 00:05:00,908 ♪ Street life 117 00:05:03,128 --> 00:05:05,435 ♪ Street life 118 00:05:07,306 --> 00:05:09,264 ♪ Street life 119 00:05:09,264 --> 00:05:10,614 [song fades] 120 00:05:10,614 --> 00:05:13,443 Daniella: Okay, get that skin nice and cunt, 121 00:05:14,792 --> 00:05:16,620 and nice and pussy. 122 00:05:18,448 --> 00:05:22,060 So hopefully these trades don't clock, darling. 123 00:05:23,104 --> 00:05:27,282 My name is Daniella Carter. 124 00:05:28,066 --> 00:05:29,937 I almost told you my middle name, 125 00:05:30,721 --> 00:05:33,811 but Daniella Carter originally from Queens, 126 00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:34,986 Queens, New York. 127 00:05:38,903 --> 00:05:40,426 I guess this is a good thing to see... 128 00:05:40,426 --> 00:05:42,167 see toothpaste on the mirror, right? 129 00:05:42,863 --> 00:05:44,691 At least you know the girl's got a fresh mouth. 130 00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:50,218 Because I do electrolysis, I can't wax my face, 131 00:05:51,176 --> 00:05:52,438 I have to shave it like this. 132 00:05:52,438 --> 00:05:55,659 But I like it, it's actually, like really good. 133 00:05:56,529 --> 00:05:59,140 So to any girls who's trying to figure out 134 00:05:59,140 --> 00:06:00,968 how to get a close shave, 135 00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:03,362 Miss Conair, Miss Thing. And give me my coin, 136 00:06:03,362 --> 00:06:04,798 'cause I'm giving y'all a little shout out. 137 00:06:05,364 --> 00:06:07,192 But this is very much the tea, 138 00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:09,237 to be honest with you, I keep this in my purse. 139 00:06:10,108 --> 00:06:14,112 If you out, I'm out and about with a trade or something, 140 00:06:14,112 --> 00:06:16,331 or you know, you gotta wake up at somebody's house honey, 141 00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:18,769 but you know you're a very spiky girl, 142 00:06:20,248 --> 00:06:22,337 make sure you carry your little tools. 143 00:06:23,556 --> 00:06:25,732 Cause you might've looked real going in there at night, 144 00:06:26,777 --> 00:06:28,518 'cause you don't want to walk out there giving clock 145 00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:31,129 during the day in these. And if you do, fuck it. 146 00:06:32,173 --> 00:06:35,481 Just be you. Be true to you. 147 00:06:36,134 --> 00:06:38,092 But this cunt? Oh, no, honey. 148 00:06:39,354 --> 00:06:41,269 Not me. [chuckles] 149 00:06:41,618 --> 00:06:45,012 I'm sorry, walk in your truth, but that one's just not mine. 150 00:06:45,404 --> 00:06:46,492 [chuckles] 151 00:06:46,492 --> 00:06:49,408 [upbeat rock music playing] 152 00:06:50,801 --> 00:06:52,498 Dominique: I had gotten introduced to sex work 153 00:06:52,498 --> 00:06:54,544 because I was working at a restaurant, 154 00:06:54,544 --> 00:06:57,764 a very famous restaurant here in New York City, called Lucky Chang's. 155 00:06:58,069 --> 00:07:01,855 And all my girlfriends were like, 156 00:07:02,856 --> 00:07:04,292 getting all surgeries, 157 00:07:04,292 --> 00:07:08,340 like breasts and faces and nose jobs and you know, 158 00:07:08,340 --> 00:07:11,865 I'm 19 at the time, 19 going on 20. 159 00:07:11,865 --> 00:07:14,215 And like, you know, we were making good money, 160 00:07:14,215 --> 00:07:15,565 but it wasn't enough money to pay 161 00:07:15,565 --> 00:07:17,480 thousands of dollars of surgery. 162 00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:20,918 So I'm like asking my friends, I'm like, 163 00:07:20,918 --> 00:07:24,443 "Hey, you guys, like, What? How did you do that? 164 00:07:24,443 --> 00:07:26,358 Like, what's going on?" And they're like... 165 00:07:27,315 --> 00:07:28,621 they're like, "Oh, you know girl, 166 00:07:28,621 --> 00:07:30,014 we're working, you know, we're working." 167 00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:31,450 I'm like, "Well, we're working here. 168 00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:32,930 Like, what do you mean we're working?" 169 00:07:32,930 --> 00:07:35,193 And they're like, "No, we're working." 170 00:07:35,585 --> 00:07:38,413 The only reason I started sex work was because 171 00:07:38,413 --> 00:07:41,025 my mom, my sister and I was homeless. 172 00:07:41,460 --> 00:07:42,374 We had family members 173 00:07:43,027 --> 00:07:44,463 letting us stay at the house, but they wouldn't feel 174 00:07:44,463 --> 00:07:45,682 comfortable with me being there, 175 00:07:45,682 --> 00:07:48,511 - because I was gay. - [soft jazz music] 176 00:07:49,642 --> 00:07:51,426 My oldest sister let us come stay with her 177 00:07:51,426 --> 00:07:52,950 and she was like, 178 00:07:53,341 --> 00:07:54,952 she had just got married and she was like, 179 00:07:54,952 --> 00:07:57,084 "I don't feel comf... My husband does not feel comfortable 180 00:07:57,084 --> 00:07:58,433 with you staying here," 181 00:07:58,695 --> 00:08:00,479 Which I don't know why, cause he never seen me. 182 00:08:01,349 --> 00:08:03,482 Like, we stayed in the basement or whatever. 183 00:08:04,309 --> 00:08:05,876 He would never see me, so I didn't understand 184 00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:08,531 how he didn't feel comfortable with me being there. 185 00:08:08,531 --> 00:08:12,622 I felt like more... she was more uncomfortable, you know, 186 00:08:13,623 --> 00:08:15,581 not knowing who I was as this new girl. 187 00:08:15,581 --> 00:08:18,541 Like, but I transitioned and she asked me 188 00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:20,281 to leave her house, that was the last straw for me. 189 00:08:20,281 --> 00:08:22,022 I was like, "I gotta find a way." 190 00:08:22,022 --> 00:08:23,894 My mom and my sister left too because they didn't... 191 00:08:23,894 --> 00:08:26,897 they was like, "She gotta go, we gotta go." 192 00:08:26,897 --> 00:08:30,335 And we all slept in the truck on National Highway, 193 00:08:31,336 --> 00:08:32,597 I'll never forget. 194 00:08:32,597 --> 00:08:35,166 And that was the first day I started working 195 00:08:35,166 --> 00:08:36,820 to put us in a hotel, and then from then 196 00:08:36,820 --> 00:08:40,301 I would like, catch my clients, like every other day 197 00:08:40,301 --> 00:08:41,999 to make sure that I had enough money to pay 198 00:08:41,999 --> 00:08:46,743 for like hotels, and make sure we had food to eat, 199 00:08:47,221 --> 00:08:48,483 and we would go hotel to hotel. 200 00:08:48,483 --> 00:08:50,268 We did that for a couple of years 201 00:08:50,268 --> 00:08:52,749 until I got stronger in my craft 202 00:08:52,749 --> 00:08:55,926 and figured out how to master this shit. 203 00:08:57,754 --> 00:09:00,408 - [upbeat music playing] - ♪ Yeah, mm-hmm 204 00:09:01,366 --> 00:09:04,630 ♪ Yeah, uh, mm-hmm, uh 205 00:09:04,630 --> 00:09:07,372 ♪ Yeah, uh, yeah, uh 206 00:09:08,155 --> 00:09:10,810 ♪ Yeah, uh, mm-hmm 207 00:09:14,292 --> 00:09:17,469 Girl the neighbors be all in my damn business, girl. 208 00:09:17,469 --> 00:09:18,862 These walls are paper thin. 209 00:09:19,514 --> 00:09:23,562 Most of the time it's niggas that you would never know 210 00:09:24,258 --> 00:09:27,435 that they get down, you would never know. 211 00:09:27,435 --> 00:09:31,831 I've had the most thuggish hood type niggas, you know, 212 00:09:33,050 --> 00:09:34,529 saggin their pants, "What up, bro?" 213 00:09:34,529 --> 00:09:36,314 You know what I'm saying? Like those type of niggas, 214 00:09:36,314 --> 00:09:37,968 like when you come around you would never... 215 00:09:37,968 --> 00:09:39,317 Dread heads, 216 00:09:39,708 --> 00:09:42,537 fine-ass dread head light-skinned niggas 217 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:44,714 with big dicks, 218 00:09:45,323 --> 00:09:47,151 you know the type that the average girl would go for. 219 00:09:47,455 --> 00:09:48,587 You know. 220 00:09:51,024 --> 00:09:52,939 It's crazy because these types of men, 221 00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:54,811 like you would never think 222 00:09:56,595 --> 00:09:59,076 that they would do anything with a trans woman 223 00:09:59,076 --> 00:10:00,991 or just a gay person or anything. 224 00:10:01,339 --> 00:10:03,994 But they would walk up to you and say, 225 00:10:04,690 --> 00:10:06,474 you know, it depends. 226 00:10:06,474 --> 00:10:10,217 If you're getting a client off your ad, that's different. 227 00:10:10,217 --> 00:10:12,263 But sometimes I meet clients in real life, 228 00:10:12,567 --> 00:10:13,525 and they'll be like... 229 00:10:16,746 --> 00:10:19,226 [nonchalant music playing] 230 00:10:19,836 --> 00:10:21,228 "Hey, psst. 231 00:10:21,576 --> 00:10:23,970 What's up, ma? I'm trying to get at you," you know. 232 00:10:24,449 --> 00:10:25,363 "Can I get your number?" 233 00:10:25,885 --> 00:10:27,365 Just trying to, you know, looking around and shit, 234 00:10:27,365 --> 00:10:29,106 making sure nobody is watching. 235 00:10:31,978 --> 00:10:34,024 I've had some type of men that you just, 236 00:10:34,024 --> 00:10:38,376 you would never expect at all that they like trans women, 237 00:10:38,376 --> 00:10:41,074 and especially ones that you would never think 238 00:10:41,596 --> 00:10:43,294 like to take dick up the ass. 239 00:10:44,077 --> 00:10:46,210 Tarxan: Niggas can't accept being with a trans woman 240 00:10:46,210 --> 00:10:49,343 in public because it's their ego and they going to feel like, 241 00:10:49,343 --> 00:10:52,607 because that's what they like, the world is gonna look at them 242 00:10:52,607 --> 00:10:54,044 and belittle them for what they like. 243 00:10:54,044 --> 00:10:56,611 Or if they married like, like I said, 244 00:10:56,611 --> 00:10:58,613 if they married or have children, you know, 245 00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:00,877 that's something that could compromise his whole, 246 00:11:00,877 --> 00:11:02,269 - his whole... - Lexx: His whole situation. 247 00:11:02,269 --> 00:11:03,444 Tarxan: Whatever job he has, you know. 248 00:11:03,923 --> 00:11:05,403 It could stop, you know, depending on what situation, 249 00:11:05,403 --> 00:11:06,360 - Tarxan: but now... - Lexx: He got, I mean, 250 00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:08,275 that shit get a nigga fucked up too. 251 00:11:08,754 --> 00:11:11,017 That goes to him, that's going for the dudes not being true to they self. 252 00:11:11,017 --> 00:11:12,584 That shit get a nigga fucked up too. 253 00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:14,455 Tarxan: But that's why niggas can't, they... 254 00:11:14,455 --> 00:11:15,543 like if that's what you like, 255 00:11:16,022 --> 00:11:17,720 you have to be true to yourself, but they can't. 256 00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:19,112 Because you done built this whole life, 257 00:11:19,112 --> 00:11:21,549 this whole lie, you done lied your whole life, 258 00:11:21,549 --> 00:11:23,900 of about, yeah, you this tough top dude 259 00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,858 or you this family man. 260 00:11:25,858 --> 00:11:27,686 You got your kids, you married, 261 00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:29,819 she owns half your stuff. You can't lose none of that. 262 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,169 But you know, you in love with a trans woman 263 00:11:32,169 --> 00:11:34,040 and you can't come out with that, 264 00:11:34,040 --> 00:11:35,650 because that's gonna compromise everything. 265 00:11:35,650 --> 00:11:37,652 So like, this person is transgender, 266 00:11:37,652 --> 00:11:38,784 I know that they got a past. 267 00:11:38,784 --> 00:11:40,655 I know that at one point in time they was 268 00:11:40,655 --> 00:11:42,570 - another gender, okay? - Lexx: They was a, yeah. 269 00:11:42,570 --> 00:11:44,877 So now I have like within this mindset, 270 00:11:45,399 --> 00:11:47,401 if I'm gonna start a relationship with this person, 271 00:11:47,401 --> 00:11:49,490 I have to basically take in they... 272 00:11:49,490 --> 00:11:51,231 see I have to accept that. 273 00:11:51,666 --> 00:11:54,060 Now I think acceptance is a lot of the problem too. 274 00:11:54,060 --> 00:11:58,064 I think acceptance of, they've overcome whatever it is for them. 275 00:11:59,022 --> 00:12:00,501 Their acceptance is not at the same level 276 00:12:00,501 --> 00:12:02,460 that the trans person's is obviously, 277 00:12:02,460 --> 00:12:03,678 because they've made that jump. 278 00:12:03,678 --> 00:12:04,723 Tarxan: Yeah, they already jumped. 279 00:12:04,723 --> 00:12:05,768 Lexx: As a person, no matter 280 00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:08,074 how attracted to it they may be, no matter what, 281 00:12:08,814 --> 00:12:11,382 they in their mind, they ain't make that jump yet. 282 00:12:11,861 --> 00:12:14,124 So because they ain't make that jump, they're not gonna. 283 00:12:14,124 --> 00:12:15,429 They ain't, they ain't gonna. 284 00:12:15,429 --> 00:12:16,604 Tarxan: They physically made the jump 285 00:12:17,431 --> 00:12:19,129 - as far as dealing with one... - Tarxan: Right, right, right. 286 00:12:19,129 --> 00:12:20,870 - But not mentally as far as... - Let's experience it. 287 00:12:20,870 --> 00:12:22,262 Tarxan: Letting the world know that that's what they like. 288 00:12:22,262 --> 00:12:23,916 That's why I said if you like them, go hard for them bro. 289 00:12:23,916 --> 00:12:25,918 Because you, if you feel like you're gonna be embarrassed, 290 00:12:25,918 --> 00:12:28,138 you shouldn't be doing it if you feel like you gonna be embarrassed. 291 00:12:28,138 --> 00:12:29,922 Go hard, if that's what you like, it's okay. 292 00:12:30,357 --> 00:12:31,794 If you go hard, who's gonna say anything? 293 00:12:31,794 --> 00:12:32,882 What they, what they gonna say? 294 00:12:32,882 --> 00:12:34,057 Just don't try to live a double life. 295 00:12:34,405 --> 00:12:35,754 Don't live a double, that's when you get caught up. 296 00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:36,711 don't live the double life. 297 00:12:37,843 --> 00:12:38,888 No ass. 298 00:12:39,802 --> 00:12:41,020 But they still live. 299 00:12:41,629 --> 00:12:42,761 Flat ass. 300 00:12:43,327 --> 00:12:44,458 Flat ass bitch. 301 00:12:44,458 --> 00:12:46,721 No I'm... [laughing] 302 00:12:48,245 --> 00:12:49,550 I'm really a Kiki. 303 00:12:51,857 --> 00:12:53,293 They say, "Yo, flatty," 304 00:12:54,251 --> 00:12:55,861 "Yo shorty with the flatty." 305 00:12:56,819 --> 00:12:58,037 "Hey, yo, muma." 306 00:12:58,777 --> 00:12:59,647 [laughing] 307 00:13:00,953 --> 00:13:02,825 A girl finally get a good sugar daddy, 308 00:13:03,173 --> 00:13:05,305 "Oh yes honey, he got me living like the white women." 309 00:13:06,350 --> 00:13:08,787 Guess there is no successful Black women in this world. 310 00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,270 Can't be a fab Black woman. 311 00:13:14,053 --> 00:13:15,533 Only gotta be the fab white women. 312 00:13:18,753 --> 00:13:20,886 I used to be problematic like that too, so. 313 00:13:22,888 --> 00:13:25,804 I wanted to be white, I wanted to be cunt. 314 00:13:27,806 --> 00:13:30,591 And it's giving, bitch, they don't even want you in their neighborhoods, 315 00:13:31,766 --> 00:13:32,811 [chuckling] 316 00:13:34,073 --> 00:13:35,031 at all. 317 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:37,685 So now you trying to keep up with the fucking Joneses, 318 00:13:37,685 --> 00:13:39,122 and the Joneses don't want you. 319 00:13:41,472 --> 00:13:42,865 And that's how dumb we becoming. 320 00:13:44,823 --> 00:13:46,869 All right, you ready? 321 00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:52,352 ♪ Do, do, do, do, do 322 00:13:54,833 --> 00:13:59,838 ♪ Do, ooh 323 00:14:02,449 --> 00:14:07,411 ♪ Do, ooh 324 00:14:09,543 --> 00:14:14,548 ♪ Do, do, do, do, do, do, do ♪ 325 00:14:19,162 --> 00:14:21,947 Rich-Paris: We met through a mutual friend. 326 00:14:22,687 --> 00:14:24,428 I'm not gonna say his name, 327 00:14:24,428 --> 00:14:26,865 but we met through a mutual friend 328 00:14:28,823 --> 00:14:33,524 who called this one on FaceTime. 329 00:14:34,568 --> 00:14:39,922 And when he called this one on Facetime and I seen him, 330 00:14:40,661 --> 00:14:42,098 I was, I went to flirting. 331 00:14:43,751 --> 00:14:44,970 He was acting stuck up. 332 00:14:46,537 --> 00:14:48,974 He didn't wanna add me back on Instagram, 333 00:14:49,583 --> 00:14:51,020 even when I DMed him and was like... 334 00:14:51,020 --> 00:14:52,804 - That's crazy you didn't say... - "Are you gonna add me 335 00:14:52,804 --> 00:14:54,588 - back on Instagram?" - ...none of this on the call. 336 00:14:54,588 --> 00:14:56,112 Now you wanna snitch on me. That's so crazy. 337 00:14:56,112 --> 00:14:57,113 That is so crazy. 338 00:14:57,896 --> 00:14:59,463 I was already cooking spaghetti. 339 00:14:59,854 --> 00:15:01,813 That shit was good as fuck. [laughing] 340 00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:03,032 And then I knew he liked me, 341 00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:06,905 because when we slept together he nudged me. So... 342 00:15:07,993 --> 00:15:09,038 I who? 343 00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:11,518 - I nudged you? - Yeah. 344 00:15:11,518 --> 00:15:13,607 - What that mean? - You put it up against me. 345 00:15:15,696 --> 00:15:18,221 I knew about everything that came with him as well. 346 00:15:18,221 --> 00:15:19,962 Like, so I seen the pictures. 347 00:15:20,745 --> 00:15:21,615 [spring boinging] 348 00:15:22,486 --> 00:15:23,574 So I already knew. 349 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:29,232 I was with a girlfriend of mine and we were in the Bronx 350 00:15:29,493 --> 00:15:31,016 and we met these guys at a club. 351 00:15:31,669 --> 00:15:33,366 We ended up going home with them, 352 00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:35,586 and we went to some basement apartment. 353 00:15:36,282 --> 00:15:40,591 And you know, we were messing around with the guys, oral sex, whatever. 354 00:15:49,078 --> 00:15:52,733 ♪ Ah, ah 355 00:15:55,954 --> 00:15:58,652 ♪ Hey, yeah 356 00:15:59,305 --> 00:16:01,699 ♪ Yeah, yeah 357 00:16:06,356 --> 00:16:08,967 [soft jazzy music] 358 00:16:11,317 --> 00:16:13,537 Dominique: It's like, after the fact when I'm cleaning myself, 359 00:16:13,537 --> 00:16:15,626 like standing there washing myself and I had a skirt, 360 00:16:15,626 --> 00:16:17,584 and he wanted to like, go under my skirt. 361 00:16:18,977 --> 00:16:20,979 And he like grabbed me like by force, 362 00:16:20,979 --> 00:16:22,633 like and felt that I have a penis. 363 00:16:22,633 --> 00:16:26,724 And the same time like came and smacked me so hard in the face. 364 00:16:26,724 --> 00:16:28,465 I ran out of the apartment. 365 00:16:28,465 --> 00:16:31,163 The fact that, that happened after the orgasm, 366 00:16:31,642 --> 00:16:36,473 you felt embarrassed after you came, which is usually how it goes. 367 00:16:36,473 --> 00:16:39,345 Like, violence doesn't happen before the orgasm. 368 00:16:39,345 --> 00:16:42,522 It happens after and then they wanna realize and act out, 369 00:16:42,522 --> 00:16:45,177 because they feel like their masculinity is threatened. 370 00:16:45,830 --> 00:16:48,093 And that's why like, you know, you need to be honest. 371 00:16:48,093 --> 00:16:49,790 I used to do those shows all the time. 372 00:16:49,790 --> 00:16:51,531 I used to have sex with guys without telling them 373 00:16:51,531 --> 00:16:54,012 I was trans and telling them I have my period, 374 00:16:54,012 --> 00:16:56,449 and bending over with the lights off. 375 00:16:56,449 --> 00:16:58,060 And you know, at the end of the day 376 00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:00,845 these guys wanna act out, and of their masculinity, 377 00:17:00,845 --> 00:17:02,673 they feel like their masculinity is threatened. 378 00:17:02,673 --> 00:17:05,979 The whole stereotype that you're gay 379 00:17:06,545 --> 00:17:08,199 if you sleep with a trans woman, 380 00:17:08,199 --> 00:17:10,202 just because we have male genitals 381 00:17:10,202 --> 00:17:13,423 but a lot of us are way woman than a lot of cis women. 382 00:17:14,598 --> 00:17:17,035 The only thing is we have male parts. 383 00:17:17,035 --> 00:17:19,081 [engine revving] 384 00:17:19,081 --> 00:17:22,214 What we usually do as trannies, we be broken down, 385 00:17:22,214 --> 00:17:23,607 but we need to stand out. 386 00:17:24,956 --> 00:17:26,305 [laughing] 387 00:17:27,132 --> 00:17:30,831 Okay, broken the fuck down and needed all of that sound, all of that attention. 388 00:17:32,224 --> 00:17:34,748 Maybe I'm lying to myself here, you know, but, 389 00:17:36,185 --> 00:17:37,925 it's kinda funny because it's like, 390 00:17:38,187 --> 00:17:40,798 with that moment of the car going by, 391 00:17:40,798 --> 00:17:42,713 like being broken down but making it sound 392 00:17:42,713 --> 00:17:44,845 like it's a motherfucking Mustang or a Porsche. 393 00:17:45,498 --> 00:17:49,372 It's like that's what we give. We're good at being broken down, 394 00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:54,681 but before people see us, we have a great way of making ourselves stand out. 395 00:17:55,247 --> 00:17:56,901 Having that loud roar. 396 00:17:57,423 --> 00:18:00,209 You know, it's like we gotta be the bitch in the room with the 28 inches. 397 00:18:00,687 --> 00:18:04,300 You gotta be the bitch with the biggest boobs, the biggest body, you know? 398 00:18:04,648 --> 00:18:07,433 And it's like, but meanwhile whether you use 399 00:18:07,433 --> 00:18:10,567 materialistic things to cover it up or not, are you really at peace? 400 00:18:11,220 --> 00:18:14,005 You know, are you really at peace with yourself 401 00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:17,704 knowing that the best of you is only seen 402 00:18:17,704 --> 00:18:19,053 when you're a survivalist. 403 00:18:20,577 --> 00:18:22,970 Something like for me that I've always had to think about, 404 00:18:22,970 --> 00:18:26,235 is the best of you only when you are seen as a survivalist 405 00:18:26,235 --> 00:18:28,541 because that man that's giving you the money, 406 00:18:29,151 --> 00:18:32,371 that man that's helping us pay our light bill, okay? 407 00:18:32,371 --> 00:18:35,200 But he don't gotta worry about that because his Stacy, 408 00:18:35,635 --> 00:18:38,812 his Barbara Ann, oh trust, she's laid up. 409 00:18:39,335 --> 00:18:42,033 That bitch don't gotta suck a dick, flip monkeys, 410 00:18:42,294 --> 00:18:44,992 tickle a prostate to get her light bill paid. 411 00:18:45,558 --> 00:18:48,387 Okay? [laughing] 412 00:18:48,648 --> 00:18:52,174 [light thoughtful music] 413 00:18:53,349 --> 00:18:54,785 Liyah: I can't speak for other trans women, 414 00:18:54,785 --> 00:18:57,440 but I'm not a judgmental trans woman. 415 00:18:57,788 --> 00:18:59,224 I think that when they're around us 416 00:18:59,224 --> 00:19:01,270 they feel like they can release themselves, 417 00:19:01,270 --> 00:19:03,097 and be who they really wanna be. 418 00:19:05,187 --> 00:19:07,319 And they feel like they don't have to hide or put on a front. 419 00:19:07,754 --> 00:19:09,974 that's also what guys like about trans women, 420 00:19:09,974 --> 00:19:12,281 because cis women tend to be very judgmental. 421 00:19:12,629 --> 00:19:15,022 Most cis women don't even wanna date bisexual men. 422 00:19:15,022 --> 00:19:17,590 As soon as they hear you're a bisexual, bitch, they're out. 423 00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:20,245 Okay hoe, like that's, that's done for. 424 00:19:20,245 --> 00:19:21,986 Me personally, I love bisexual men. 425 00:19:21,986 --> 00:19:23,117 I've had butch queens, 426 00:19:23,553 --> 00:19:25,859 if you don't know what that is, that is gay men, 427 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:28,775 you know, that are more on the feminine, submissive side. 428 00:19:28,775 --> 00:19:32,823 I've had, you know, more trade, top kinda guys that, 429 00:19:32,823 --> 00:19:35,869 you know, there's some guys that they just wanna fuck you. 430 00:19:36,392 --> 00:19:37,871 They don't wanna touch the dick, 431 00:19:37,871 --> 00:19:39,221 they don't wanna see the dick, 432 00:19:39,569 --> 00:19:40,961 they don't wanna do anything with it. 433 00:19:40,961 --> 00:19:42,572 They don't wanna be reminded of anything, 434 00:19:42,572 --> 00:19:45,183 that you were even once born male, or any of those things. 435 00:19:46,097 --> 00:19:48,926 So you have different types of clients, 436 00:19:48,926 --> 00:19:51,755 there's different guys that are into you 437 00:19:51,755 --> 00:19:53,452 for different reasons and different things. 438 00:19:53,452 --> 00:19:59,763 ♪ I've been looking for someone like you ♪ 439 00:20:00,851 --> 00:20:06,422 ♪ A kind man who's honest and who's true ♪ 440 00:20:08,511 --> 00:20:15,474 ♪ The kind of man who will love me just the way I am ♪ 441 00:20:15,779 --> 00:20:21,872 ♪ Who will love me, the good, the bad, the ugly ♪ 442 00:20:21,872 --> 00:20:24,091 My name is Lo. 443 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,925 I wrote for people like P. Diddy, Beyoncé, 444 00:20:32,404 --> 00:20:35,973 Usher, Mario Winans to name a few. 445 00:20:37,366 --> 00:20:38,454 Oh. Janet Jackson 446 00:20:40,107 --> 00:20:41,935 Oh, another thing that I did, 447 00:20:42,371 --> 00:20:44,068 I smoked weed with Rick James 448 00:20:44,460 --> 00:20:47,985 You know what I'm saying? I mean, I guess you could say I'm a ladies man. 449 00:20:48,507 --> 00:20:51,510 I love women and I always go for the women 450 00:20:51,510 --> 00:20:55,166 that niggas afraid to even approach, 451 00:20:55,601 --> 00:20:56,602 you know what I mean? 452 00:20:56,950 --> 00:20:59,431 I don't want somebody like that he can get, 453 00:20:59,431 --> 00:21:01,520 you know what I mean? I want the one that they say, 454 00:21:02,173 --> 00:21:03,914 "Oh. She ain't gonna give you none. 455 00:21:03,914 --> 00:21:07,091 All she gonna do is do up all your drugs and leave". 456 00:21:09,093 --> 00:21:10,137 That's the one that I want. 457 00:21:10,964 --> 00:21:13,358 I ran across this girl online. 458 00:21:13,358 --> 00:21:14,925 I was looking at her like, "Damn, she bad". 459 00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:17,493 And I was like... I was started looking close 460 00:21:17,493 --> 00:21:19,146 and reading the captions and I was like, 461 00:21:19,146 --> 00:21:20,409 "Oh, she's transgender." 462 00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,326 And I was like, "How?" 463 00:21:24,326 --> 00:21:26,632 I was like, "She's like Beyoncé fine". 464 00:21:26,632 --> 00:21:29,026 Like to this day I still never met her in person. 465 00:21:29,374 --> 00:21:32,899 And when it came down to, okay, come out to where she lives, 466 00:21:32,899 --> 00:21:35,859 I would, I just would never do it. 467 00:21:35,859 --> 00:21:38,601 But I think it's because I had too much going on, 468 00:21:38,601 --> 00:21:41,908 and too many... If I didn't have any options, like I said, 469 00:21:42,561 --> 00:21:44,041 she would probably be my girlfriend. 470 00:21:44,041 --> 00:21:46,435 I get a lot of guys that's bottoms 471 00:21:46,435 --> 00:21:49,394 'cause I'm a top. I'm a full top and 472 00:21:49,916 --> 00:21:51,135 well, I bottom sometimes. 473 00:21:51,135 --> 00:21:53,093 But mainly, majority of my clients, 474 00:21:53,093 --> 00:21:55,661 they call about big dick girls. 475 00:21:58,185 --> 00:22:00,100 If you in the workin... if you're a trans girl, 476 00:22:00,100 --> 00:22:03,756 you know that the clients like big dicks, 477 00:22:03,756 --> 00:22:05,149 and if you don't got a big dick, 478 00:22:05,149 --> 00:22:06,585 you won't make no money in this industry 479 00:22:06,585 --> 00:22:07,804 being a trans girl, I'm sorry. 480 00:22:08,065 --> 00:22:12,156 And that's what the men in, that come see me, 481 00:22:12,156 --> 00:22:13,331 that's what they're attracted to. 482 00:22:13,723 --> 00:22:16,378 They want to see a pretty-ass girl with a big dick. 483 00:22:16,378 --> 00:22:18,380 And titties, you gotta have titties and body, 484 00:22:18,380 --> 00:22:20,251 'cause if you don't, they won't be attracted to you. 485 00:22:20,251 --> 00:22:22,079 'Cause before I got any work done, 486 00:22:22,079 --> 00:22:24,081 they would walk out on me. [chuckling] 487 00:22:24,516 --> 00:22:26,039 They would turn around and walk out on me. 488 00:22:26,039 --> 00:22:29,086 If you didn't have no work done, or like, 489 00:22:29,913 --> 00:22:31,262 but once I started getting work done, 490 00:22:31,262 --> 00:22:35,571 I start getting clients like, the price went up. 491 00:22:35,571 --> 00:22:37,790 ♪ I met a girl, let her give me head ♪ 492 00:22:37,790 --> 00:22:39,270 ♪ It was fire 493 00:22:39,270 --> 00:22:41,881 ♪ She told me she was trans I said liar ♪ 494 00:22:42,360 --> 00:22:43,970 ♪ She proved me wrong ♪ 495 00:22:45,711 --> 00:22:46,930 ♪ Shit was hot 496 00:22:48,061 --> 00:22:50,412 ♪ I like what she's got 497 00:22:50,977 --> 00:22:53,502 ♪ I know it's so hot ♪ 498 00:22:54,111 --> 00:22:56,592 ♪ I don't give a fuck ♪ 499 00:22:57,157 --> 00:23:00,204 [cigarette sizzling] 500 00:23:00,204 --> 00:23:02,815 ♪ I like that I like that you like ♪ 501 00:23:02,815 --> 00:23:05,775 ♪ Shit we might fuck on two dykes ♪ 502 00:23:06,253 --> 00:23:07,124 ♪ Tonight 503 00:23:10,170 --> 00:23:15,785 Dominique: I'm supposed to, you know, have my... get my letters and, 504 00:23:16,394 --> 00:23:19,745 and start the hair removal process. 505 00:23:19,745 --> 00:23:22,922 I've always wanted to have a vagina. 506 00:23:22,922 --> 00:23:25,185 I think they said it's like three hours, 507 00:23:26,665 --> 00:23:29,668 and then you spend five days in the hospital 508 00:23:30,539 --> 00:23:34,412 where you have to deal with your you know, your packing, 509 00:23:34,412 --> 00:23:36,849 your catheter, and your dilation. 510 00:23:37,284 --> 00:23:41,288 Then you go home and you start the long process of recovery. 511 00:23:41,724 --> 00:23:43,203 It's a very long process. 512 00:23:44,378 --> 00:23:47,338 It's just, I embraced my transsexuality 513 00:23:47,773 --> 00:23:49,906 through all the years of sex work. 514 00:23:50,950 --> 00:23:53,692 But I've played the both sides of the fence. 515 00:23:53,692 --> 00:23:56,565 I've lived my life as a woman without telling everyone, 516 00:23:57,130 --> 00:23:58,697 and I lived my life as trans. 517 00:23:59,568 --> 00:24:03,310 And personally I like the other side when I'm a woman 518 00:24:03,310 --> 00:24:04,921 and no one knows that I'm trans. 519 00:24:05,791 --> 00:24:08,533 Life is a lot better that way for me. 520 00:24:09,099 --> 00:24:12,102 I feel like it's a normal life, you know? 521 00:24:13,495 --> 00:24:14,496 More normal. 522 00:24:16,498 --> 00:24:17,977 But it's a lot of work, 'cause you know, 523 00:24:17,977 --> 00:24:21,503 you gotta to work on your voice, your mannerisms, 524 00:24:21,503 --> 00:24:24,549 you have to hide who you really are. 525 00:24:24,549 --> 00:24:27,683 It's very uncomfortable, very taxing on the brain. 526 00:24:28,379 --> 00:24:30,076 It's a very stressful situation. 527 00:24:31,817 --> 00:24:35,125 But like, as that being said, like life is a lot better. 528 00:24:35,125 --> 00:24:38,302 You get treated better, you get, you know, 529 00:24:38,302 --> 00:24:42,524 people acknowledge you publicly, they're more affectionate. 530 00:24:44,264 --> 00:24:45,396 I will say this much. 531 00:24:45,396 --> 00:24:47,703 I'm not villainizing black men because, 532 00:24:47,703 --> 00:24:49,531 or black people, because I do have 533 00:24:49,531 --> 00:24:51,315 some very great Black friends. 534 00:24:51,315 --> 00:24:53,752 Like I have a Black friend who lives down in Tribeca, 535 00:24:53,752 --> 00:24:56,581 and I've known him literally since I was 16 years old. 536 00:24:56,581 --> 00:24:59,410 He thought I was a little older, but I was actually 16, 537 00:25:00,106 --> 00:25:02,413 and he was the first actually example 538 00:25:02,413 --> 00:25:04,981 of a successful Black man that I had ever seen, 539 00:25:04,981 --> 00:25:06,939 or encountered or had access to. 540 00:25:07,636 --> 00:25:10,029 And because of him I was like, 541 00:25:10,029 --> 00:25:13,642 "Oh, Black men can be successful." 542 00:25:13,903 --> 00:25:15,818 But then I realized in that very moment 543 00:25:15,818 --> 00:25:17,776 that I'm dealing with this Black successful man, 544 00:25:17,776 --> 00:25:21,650 that I'm actually a part of him cheating on a Black woman. 545 00:25:22,520 --> 00:25:23,869 She's not aware of the fact 546 00:25:23,869 --> 00:25:26,219 that her Black successful husband is upstairs 547 00:25:26,219 --> 00:25:28,570 in their beautiful condo down in Tribeca 548 00:25:28,874 --> 00:25:30,441 laid up with a Black trans woman. 549 00:25:30,441 --> 00:25:32,443 Right, but that could happen with a white man as well. 550 00:25:32,443 --> 00:25:35,054 Yeah, but the way that it's happening with white men, 551 00:25:35,402 --> 00:25:37,187 it's easier for them to talk about the ways that 552 00:25:37,187 --> 00:25:39,276 in our Black culture and communities, that we're not. 553 00:25:39,276 --> 00:25:41,191 Like we act as if it does not happen, 554 00:25:41,495 --> 00:25:44,063 until people are put in positions to be shamed. 555 00:25:44,324 --> 00:25:47,763 If anybody is better at anything, I believe, and this is no shade, 556 00:25:48,067 --> 00:25:50,374 that Black people are more prevalent 557 00:25:50,374 --> 00:25:53,551 to be in a position of the imposter syndrome, 558 00:25:54,117 --> 00:25:56,119 and having to propagate that because they're, 559 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,600 they've always been perceived as a second-class citizen. 560 00:25:59,035 --> 00:26:00,427 So they're always trying to find a way 561 00:26:00,427 --> 00:26:01,907 how to be seen as enough. 562 00:26:02,473 --> 00:26:04,257 But that is something so common. 563 00:26:04,997 --> 00:26:06,695 You know? It's so common. 564 00:26:06,695 --> 00:26:08,348 Like you may not understand it to be that way 565 00:26:08,348 --> 00:26:09,349 I don't but I do. 566 00:26:09,741 --> 00:26:11,351 I don't understand it cause I am not Black. 567 00:26:11,613 --> 00:26:12,657 - Right. - No, but... 568 00:26:13,310 --> 00:26:14,703 And they'll give you the treatment that I will never get. 569 00:26:14,703 --> 00:26:17,227 - But... - They really will. 570 00:26:17,227 --> 00:26:18,184 Okay, and I, okay. 571 00:26:18,707 --> 00:26:19,882 - Simply, because you look... - I'm just trying... 572 00:26:19,882 --> 00:26:20,839 You don't look like, 573 00:26:21,231 --> 00:26:22,449 you don't look like a part of the problem. 574 00:26:22,449 --> 00:26:23,886 You look like you're a part of a solution. 575 00:26:24,234 --> 00:26:25,888 For the females, I want you to understand, 576 00:26:25,888 --> 00:26:27,541 it's nothing but respect. 577 00:26:29,239 --> 00:26:32,198 I don't bash females at all, that's not something I do. 578 00:26:32,938 --> 00:26:36,072 I'm willing to teach the females how to keep these dudes. 579 00:26:36,333 --> 00:26:39,118 The dudes love how dominant I am, 'cause I like basically 580 00:26:39,118 --> 00:26:40,990 make them do what the fuck I want them to do. 581 00:26:41,425 --> 00:26:42,687 Like if they come here, I'm like, 582 00:26:42,687 --> 00:26:43,819 "Get on your fucking knees 583 00:26:43,819 --> 00:26:45,516 and suck my dick and don't look at me". 584 00:26:46,256 --> 00:26:48,650 That's how your average hood nigga want to be treated. 585 00:26:49,433 --> 00:26:50,869 Like, that's how they want to be treated. 586 00:26:50,869 --> 00:26:53,698 Like, the reason you girls can't keep, 587 00:26:53,698 --> 00:26:55,831 the reason a lot of females cannot keep a man 588 00:26:55,831 --> 00:26:57,615 because you don't, you gotta know how to operate, 589 00:26:57,615 --> 00:27:01,967 how they operate. Bitch, they go work 12-hour jobs. 590 00:27:01,967 --> 00:27:03,229 Bitch, they don't wanna come home 591 00:27:03,621 --> 00:27:05,928 and hear you talking about, "Who you've been talking to, 592 00:27:05,928 --> 00:27:07,669 where you been," and da, da, da, da. 593 00:27:07,669 --> 00:27:11,281 Bitch, I'll be on my knees with my hands tied behind my back 594 00:27:11,281 --> 00:27:13,631 with my mouth open, like that's how you keep a man. 595 00:27:14,501 --> 00:27:16,852 They come see us, they don't go straight home to y'all no mo'. 596 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:19,202 It's because, and I'm not against y'all. 597 00:27:19,202 --> 00:27:21,639 I'm willing to, I'm willing to share this with you guys. 598 00:27:21,639 --> 00:27:24,468 I want y'all to know like, so y'all can keep y'all man, 599 00:27:24,468 --> 00:27:25,512 'cause I don't want them. 600 00:27:25,948 --> 00:27:27,471 Bitch, I just want a few dollar, you know, 601 00:27:27,471 --> 00:27:29,081 I want what they can do for me, that's it. 602 00:27:29,081 --> 00:27:30,735 I don't care about being in a relationship with them. 603 00:27:30,735 --> 00:27:31,867 I'm never gonna be in love with them. 604 00:27:31,867 --> 00:27:33,129 I don't care about how they feel. 605 00:27:33,129 --> 00:27:34,913 I don't care if they had a bad day at work. 606 00:27:34,913 --> 00:27:36,219 This is not something I care about. 607 00:27:36,567 --> 00:27:38,395 I only care about their bank account, 608 00:27:39,744 --> 00:27:40,876 their income... 609 00:27:40,876 --> 00:27:41,877 [vinyl scratching] 610 00:27:43,661 --> 00:27:45,532 ...how good they can suck dick and get on their knees 611 00:27:45,532 --> 00:27:47,839 and get fucked and that's it, that's all I care about. 612 00:27:48,274 --> 00:27:50,712 I really don't care about nothing else with them. Like, I just don't, 613 00:27:50,712 --> 00:27:52,452 I don't have a heart for them, and I'm being honest. 614 00:27:53,105 --> 00:27:55,586 [soft progressive music playing] 615 00:28:02,549 --> 00:28:07,119 [singers singing] 616 00:28:12,255 --> 00:28:16,476 Lo: She's just an exotic looking girl, she looks different. 617 00:28:16,476 --> 00:28:19,262 Like you don't know what nationality she is. 618 00:28:19,262 --> 00:28:24,876 You know she's, she just looks like an attractive woman. 619 00:28:25,921 --> 00:28:29,185 that's you know, that's all I see. 620 00:28:29,620 --> 00:28:32,797 I just saw a girl that I liked that I thought was a girl, 621 00:28:32,797 --> 00:28:36,235 and then when I found out that she was trans, 622 00:28:37,802 --> 00:28:38,803 you know, I still liked her. 623 00:28:39,978 --> 00:28:44,113 And then she has breasts. I'm like, I might play with her titties and all that. 624 00:28:44,113 --> 00:28:48,117 I'm definitely not touching any dicks. 625 00:28:48,595 --> 00:28:49,509 [laughing] 626 00:28:50,032 --> 00:28:51,468 You know, I might squeeze her ass or something. 627 00:28:51,947 --> 00:28:54,732 Nobody's touching my ass, 'cause that turns me off, my dick go limp. 628 00:28:54,732 --> 00:28:56,560 Even regular girls, if they try to do that, 629 00:28:56,560 --> 00:28:57,779 get too close with a finger, limp. 630 00:28:58,344 --> 00:28:59,955 I don't know, it's just I mean, 631 00:28:59,955 --> 00:29:03,828 I'll probably let her suck my dick because she's so pretty 632 00:29:03,828 --> 00:29:05,221 and she looks good, you know what I mean? 633 00:29:05,699 --> 00:29:09,094 It depends on what state you catch me in, I guess. 634 00:29:09,573 --> 00:29:11,357 Just not, it's not that cut and dry. 635 00:29:11,923 --> 00:29:13,577 If somebody's attractive, they're just attractive. 636 00:29:14,273 --> 00:29:16,101 [R&B music playing] 637 00:29:35,947 --> 00:29:38,123 XoTommy: I feel like my oldest brother on my mom's side 638 00:29:38,123 --> 00:29:40,734 always knew but never said. 639 00:29:40,734 --> 00:29:44,738 Well, I feel like he knew when I started being DL, I feel like. 640 00:29:46,175 --> 00:29:52,659 Now my sister, she hangs around gays all the time, 641 00:29:52,659 --> 00:29:54,923 so I'm pretty sure she knew, and she didn't have a problem with it. 642 00:29:57,708 --> 00:29:59,405 My mom, my older family, 643 00:29:59,405 --> 00:30:00,885 like the older generation of my family, 644 00:30:00,885 --> 00:30:02,539 like my mom, aunties and all of them, 645 00:30:02,887 --> 00:30:04,062 they found out through social media. 646 00:30:04,367 --> 00:30:06,804 And one day I was in Atlanta at a hotel room, 647 00:30:07,544 --> 00:30:08,501 and my mama called me. 648 00:30:11,722 --> 00:30:15,857 And I was just sitting right there like, "Hey Ma." 649 00:30:16,292 --> 00:30:18,424 She called me and was like, "You know if there's anything 650 00:30:18,424 --> 00:30:20,426 you need to talk about, you know you can talk to me". 651 00:30:20,687 --> 00:30:21,732 But in my head I'm like, 652 00:30:22,385 --> 00:30:25,257 I know my mama don't like the LGBT, she does not like gays. 653 00:30:25,257 --> 00:30:27,825 Like, they old school, my mom is 70. 654 00:30:28,304 --> 00:30:30,175 I lied, very fast, my mom is 70. 655 00:30:33,570 --> 00:30:36,573 So if y'all like parents or guardians are around that age, 656 00:30:36,573 --> 00:30:38,227 y'all should know, they don't play that shit. 657 00:30:38,227 --> 00:30:43,188 Like they just don't, even to this day it's still weird 658 00:30:43,188 --> 00:30:44,189 having to talk to my mom. 659 00:30:45,060 --> 00:30:47,714 Like, and it's super weird to say that, 660 00:30:47,714 --> 00:30:49,673 because it's like my mom has been 661 00:30:49,673 --> 00:30:52,110 like my number one backbone since I was a kid. 662 00:30:52,110 --> 00:30:55,113 I've never met my father ever, for real, for real. 663 00:30:55,113 --> 00:30:56,375 Like, I don't even know him. 664 00:30:56,375 --> 00:30:58,073 His personality, I don't even know his lingo. 665 00:30:59,465 --> 00:31:02,033 My father started calling me from prison last year around, 666 00:31:02,033 --> 00:31:03,382 down around the time I got shot. 667 00:31:04,035 --> 00:31:05,558 He was calling, still never saw him. 668 00:31:06,124 --> 00:31:07,952 He called me and I had told him, 669 00:31:07,952 --> 00:31:09,301 I think I had told him like, 670 00:31:09,301 --> 00:31:11,042 after like the second phone call I told him. 671 00:31:11,042 --> 00:31:12,435 He was like, "Oh, that's fine. 672 00:31:12,435 --> 00:31:14,002 My best friend's gay whoopty whoop." 673 00:31:14,002 --> 00:31:15,960 But I wanna say a couple of months went down the line. 674 00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:17,744 Remember I told you, I told you I ran into my, 675 00:31:17,744 --> 00:31:20,617 ran into my brothers and I end up talking to them and shit, 676 00:31:20,617 --> 00:31:22,924 and they told me that my dad was in there gettin down. 677 00:31:22,924 --> 00:31:24,142 I was like. 678 00:31:24,142 --> 00:31:27,624 ♪ Hey, hey 679 00:31:27,624 --> 00:31:28,930 ♪ Hey, make my pussy say 680 00:31:28,930 --> 00:31:30,801 ♪ Hey, hey 681 00:31:31,671 --> 00:31:34,936 ♪ Yeah, make my pussy say 682 00:31:36,676 --> 00:31:38,548 ♪ Hey, yeah, make my pussy say ♪ 683 00:31:38,548 --> 00:31:41,420 ♪ Hey, hey, mwah 684 00:31:48,340 --> 00:31:51,996 Dominique: I wish like at least like half of the guys 685 00:31:51,996 --> 00:31:56,609 that I've dated, been with, slept with, celebrities, 686 00:31:56,609 --> 00:32:00,222 would you know, say that they are been with me. 687 00:32:00,918 --> 00:32:03,790 I mean any normal guy would not be ashamed 688 00:32:03,790 --> 00:32:05,618 to say that they've slept with me. 689 00:32:05,967 --> 00:32:08,621 And my thing is, why do you care 690 00:32:08,621 --> 00:32:10,536 where somebody else is putting their dick? 691 00:32:11,015 --> 00:32:13,844 Like if they wanna put their dick in the girl, in the wife 692 00:32:13,844 --> 00:32:16,412 and they're trans, like that's their dick. 693 00:32:16,673 --> 00:32:18,283 That's who they wanna fuck. 694 00:32:18,283 --> 00:32:22,635 Why does everybody else care about who wants to fuck who? 695 00:32:22,896 --> 00:32:24,202 It should be nobody's business. 696 00:32:24,202 --> 00:32:27,118 Worry about who you're fucking, and that's it. 697 00:32:27,423 --> 00:32:29,120 Like, this is the problem with this world. 698 00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:32,210 Everybody's so worried about who's fucking who, 699 00:32:32,515 --> 00:32:34,691 when at the end of the day they wanna fuck each other. 700 00:32:35,735 --> 00:32:38,347 So that's the whole tea. 701 00:32:39,217 --> 00:32:43,221 [slow music playing] 702 00:32:45,832 --> 00:32:50,402 ♪ I've been a fool for too long ♪ 703 00:32:51,838 --> 00:32:54,928 ♪ In my eyes, there's no wrong ♪ 704 00:32:56,582 --> 00:32:59,324 ♪ Oh god, I'm blind ♪ 705 00:33:02,980 --> 00:33:07,419 ♪ And now he's lying to my face ♪ 706 00:33:07,724 --> 00:33:11,771 ♪ I wish he knew a cooler way ♪ 707 00:33:12,990 --> 00:33:17,125 ♪ To break a girl's heart today ♪ 708 00:33:17,995 --> 00:33:21,303 Dominique: And girls ask me like why I don't give a fuck about trade, 'cause I don't. 709 00:33:21,303 --> 00:33:24,654 They will come fuck on you, drain you of all your energy, 710 00:33:25,220 --> 00:33:26,525 and go back home to their girlfriend. 711 00:33:26,786 --> 00:33:28,962 And what I had learned about trade too, 712 00:33:30,225 --> 00:33:31,922 like it's hard to deal with them men 713 00:33:31,922 --> 00:33:34,707 when they got baby mamas, 'cause they always, 714 00:33:34,707 --> 00:33:36,796 they'll drop you at any time to go back to them. 715 00:33:37,058 --> 00:33:40,409 So that's why I learned like, pay me. 716 00:33:40,931 --> 00:33:42,672 Pay me and get the fuck outta my face. 717 00:33:45,501 --> 00:33:49,157 But trade is the average straight man. 718 00:33:50,723 --> 00:33:52,377 And those are the people that wanna bottom, 719 00:33:53,813 --> 00:33:56,729 like it's the hood guys. Like they want to get fucked, 720 00:33:57,687 --> 00:33:59,993 and they go right back home to their girlfriends 721 00:33:59,993 --> 00:34:02,779 like nothing never happened, and get in the bed 722 00:34:02,779 --> 00:34:04,607 with they girlfriends like nothing never happened. 723 00:34:04,607 --> 00:34:09,699 But it'd be like real tough, rugged trade like, 724 00:34:11,527 --> 00:34:12,876 and 725 00:34:13,789 --> 00:34:15,226 but trade also will kill you too. 726 00:34:15,226 --> 00:34:16,793 So you have to be very careful. 727 00:34:16,793 --> 00:34:19,622 Things that, like even when I think about my experience 728 00:34:19,622 --> 00:34:21,928 as a Black trans woman and how, you know, 729 00:34:21,928 --> 00:34:23,887 most Black women think, you know, 730 00:34:23,887 --> 00:34:26,150 that their husbands aren't sleeping with us. 731 00:34:26,150 --> 00:34:28,152 That their husbands aren't attracted to us. 732 00:34:28,152 --> 00:34:30,153 But they're the first ones that when they see us, 733 00:34:30,153 --> 00:34:32,329 they'll call us out and say that we're beautiful. 734 00:34:32,678 --> 00:34:34,202 "You really gorgeous, you're a woman." 735 00:34:34,202 --> 00:34:35,811 But until the moment they find out 736 00:34:35,811 --> 00:34:37,814 that their son or their husband likes us. 737 00:34:37,814 --> 00:34:42,210 It's for them, it's surprising to find out that their kids can be gay. 738 00:34:42,775 --> 00:34:46,300 If they understood that it's something in our culture 739 00:34:46,300 --> 00:34:47,998 that your kid can be trans, 740 00:34:48,432 --> 00:34:50,392 then we wouldn't be in a position where, you know, 741 00:34:50,392 --> 00:34:52,088 at a higher rate Black 742 00:34:52,524 --> 00:34:56,311 LGBTQIA plus youth are being rejected. 743 00:34:56,311 --> 00:34:59,923 You have to sound a certain way, you have to look a certain way. 744 00:34:59,923 --> 00:35:01,751 You have to be a certain way. 745 00:35:01,751 --> 00:35:04,797 That most of the time the strife that comes with who we are 746 00:35:04,797 --> 00:35:06,451 is because we didn't become who our parents 747 00:35:06,451 --> 00:35:08,323 - wanted us to be. - They wanted us to be. 748 00:35:08,323 --> 00:35:10,803 And I don't need to be anything you say I need to be. 749 00:35:10,803 --> 00:35:12,631 Because when your husband encountered me, 750 00:35:12,936 --> 00:35:15,765 he saw me as a Black woman, and he too would agree 751 00:35:15,765 --> 00:35:17,941 that I deserve protection as a Black woman. 752 00:35:17,941 --> 00:35:21,118 But your ignorance keep making you think that he don't see me as one. 753 00:35:21,118 --> 00:35:23,773 When I carry out my Black womanhood experience, 754 00:35:23,773 --> 00:35:27,733 know that it looks so much like you, and it is very close to home. 755 00:35:28,081 --> 00:35:31,389 It is so close to home that I may be in your home when you're not there. 756 00:35:31,911 --> 00:35:35,219 ♪ Lord, I woke up this morning ♪ 757 00:35:35,219 --> 00:35:38,918 ♪ With my pork-grinding business in my hand ♪ 758 00:35:44,054 --> 00:35:46,926 ♪ Yeah, I woke up this morning ♪ 759 00:35:47,971 --> 00:35:51,017 ♪ With my pork-grinding business in my hand ♪ 760 00:35:55,283 --> 00:35:57,937 ♪ Lord, if you can't send me no woman ♪ 761 00:35:59,112 --> 00:36:02,290 ♪ Please, send me some sissy man ♪ 762 00:36:03,595 --> 00:36:05,118 ♪ Hey, Kokomo 763 00:36:05,467 --> 00:36:06,946 I do this literally every day. 764 00:36:07,556 --> 00:36:09,906 Literally, every day I'm in the mirror looking at myself... 765 00:36:15,303 --> 00:36:16,739 [laughing] 766 00:36:18,306 --> 00:36:20,221 Yes, period. 767 00:36:21,004 --> 00:36:23,093 I don't like the concept of passibility, 768 00:36:25,182 --> 00:36:26,879 because I feel like... 769 00:36:30,056 --> 00:36:31,101 I feel like fuck passibility. 770 00:36:31,710 --> 00:36:33,973 Everybody should just do them and just be them, you know? 771 00:36:34,626 --> 00:36:36,193 And not every girl's gonna pass. 772 00:36:37,455 --> 00:36:38,761 that's, that's just the reality of it. 773 00:36:39,414 --> 00:36:43,809 Not every girl is gonna pass to look like a biological girl, you know? 774 00:36:45,115 --> 00:36:47,944 But it's, I feel like it's about working with what you got... 775 00:36:51,252 --> 00:36:53,471 just owning your look that's unique to you. 776 00:36:54,820 --> 00:36:58,215 There's all types of girls out there, you know? 777 00:36:59,172 --> 00:37:01,349 There's alternative girls, 778 00:37:02,350 --> 00:37:05,527 there's more, you know, hood bitch type of girls. 779 00:37:05,527 --> 00:37:10,140 There's the white college girls type of trans girls, 780 00:37:10,140 --> 00:37:14,057 like nerdy, you know, anime, 781 00:37:14,057 --> 00:37:16,842 Black girl lovers, like trans girls, you know? 782 00:37:17,974 --> 00:37:19,845 They're into cosplay and stuff like that. 783 00:37:19,845 --> 00:37:22,065 So there's all different types of trans women out there. 784 00:37:22,065 --> 00:37:24,937 Like, there's not just one girl. 785 00:37:28,027 --> 00:37:29,464 Personally, I don't care about passibility, 786 00:37:29,464 --> 00:37:33,642 because I feel like it stops you from living life 787 00:37:34,033 --> 00:37:35,339 the way that you wanna live life. 788 00:37:35,861 --> 00:37:37,994 And I don't feel like you should live by rules. 789 00:37:37,994 --> 00:37:40,126 You already transitioned and said fuck it, 790 00:37:40,126 --> 00:37:42,172 you might as well just do what you wanna do anyway. 791 00:37:42,172 --> 00:37:44,914 A person could be in the suburbs, right? 792 00:37:44,914 --> 00:37:48,352 And raise they child to be the most, you feel me? 793 00:37:48,352 --> 00:37:49,484 But they be a gangster, 794 00:37:49,484 --> 00:37:51,442 they out there shooting, selling drugs. 795 00:37:51,442 --> 00:37:53,052 And they parents ain't, they have great jobs. 796 00:37:53,052 --> 00:37:54,663 - Lexx: They have no reason... - They don't have to do 797 00:37:54,663 --> 00:37:56,186 - none of that. - Lexx: There's no reason for... 798 00:37:56,186 --> 00:37:57,666 - You feel me? - Lexx: There's no reason for them. 799 00:37:57,666 --> 00:37:58,884 And then you see somebody in the hood, 800 00:37:59,755 --> 00:38:01,800 they're parents was hood, ghetto, crack baby, you know, crack whatever. 801 00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:03,367 And he ain't want none of that now, 802 00:38:03,367 --> 00:38:04,890 he wanted to be something different. 803 00:38:04,890 --> 00:38:06,588 He wanted something totally different, like... 804 00:38:06,588 --> 00:38:08,241 You know, this is what you wanna do, just be real. 805 00:38:08,241 --> 00:38:10,243 Don't be hiding and actin' like you not 806 00:38:10,243 --> 00:38:11,288 be real nigga. 807 00:38:11,288 --> 00:38:12,507 Lexx: Have a conversation first. 808 00:38:12,507 --> 00:38:13,725 Tarxan: The fuck, nigga? You like dudes 809 00:38:13,725 --> 00:38:15,379 nigga you like dudes? I don't wanna hear that. 810 00:38:15,379 --> 00:38:17,120 Now you trying to hide, you in school, 811 00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:18,643 you wanna be, no nigga. 812 00:38:18,643 --> 00:38:20,776 If niggas try to make fun of you, beat them niggas up. 813 00:38:20,776 --> 00:38:22,255 - That's right. - The fuck, nigga? 814 00:38:22,255 --> 00:38:24,475 You gotta be a tough gay nigga. The fuck, 815 00:38:24,475 --> 00:38:26,259 - like that's it. - Tarxan: Toughen up. 816 00:38:26,259 --> 00:38:28,000 My son, he gonna be a tough gay nigga, that's it. 817 00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:29,480 Gonna be knockin' these niggas the fuck out, 818 00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:31,482 - like that's how I see it. - [Lexx laughing] 819 00:38:31,482 --> 00:38:33,179 You can't be soft and gay. 820 00:38:34,093 --> 00:38:35,530 My son, I'm gonna be real with him. 821 00:38:36,182 --> 00:38:37,836 If you gonna be gay, nigga, you better be the toughest nigga in there, 822 00:38:37,836 --> 00:38:39,185 'cause they gonna tease you, nigga. 823 00:38:40,491 --> 00:38:43,364 [traditional music playing] 824 00:38:46,367 --> 00:38:47,542 What they gonna say, nigga? 825 00:38:47,803 --> 00:38:48,978 My pop's a real nigga, 826 00:38:49,457 --> 00:38:51,067 I'm gay, I'm knocking you out. What's up? Whatchu wanna do? 827 00:38:51,067 --> 00:38:52,764 [Lexx laughing] 828 00:38:52,764 --> 00:38:55,376 [traditional music continues] 829 00:39:09,128 --> 00:39:13,306 If she had the full operation, and you know, 830 00:39:13,655 --> 00:39:16,179 and she had a vagina now 831 00:39:16,179 --> 00:39:18,660 and didn't have that, those parts, 832 00:39:19,225 --> 00:39:20,662 I probably would've met her by now. 833 00:39:20,662 --> 00:39:23,534 I would've probably, wouldn't have kept, you know, 834 00:39:23,534 --> 00:39:25,841 hesitating and not doing it, not going to, 835 00:39:25,841 --> 00:39:28,017 not just going to, just to meet her, 836 00:39:28,365 --> 00:39:29,410 you know what I mean? 837 00:39:30,498 --> 00:39:33,065 In fact, I prob- I know I probably would have. 838 00:39:33,979 --> 00:39:35,285 It's like, I don't wanna feel, 839 00:39:35,285 --> 00:39:37,243 feel that just like poking up against me. 840 00:39:37,243 --> 00:39:40,943 Like I don't, I don't have no desire to, to feel that. 841 00:39:40,943 --> 00:39:47,471 But you know, it's just I look at, I look at her as, as a woman. 842 00:39:48,037 --> 00:39:51,083 And so when things come, when facts come around, 843 00:39:51,083 --> 00:39:53,042 like to make it seem like, 844 00:39:53,042 --> 00:39:56,698 oh well, she's not all the way a woman yet. 845 00:39:56,698 --> 00:39:59,222 So that makes, that makes it, you know, 846 00:40:00,528 --> 00:40:03,008 that's where I feel I can't go through with it, 847 00:40:03,531 --> 00:40:04,532 you know what I mean? 848 00:40:08,753 --> 00:40:11,234 Like when I see my sister and them nowadays, I don't even... 849 00:40:13,105 --> 00:40:14,846 it's not that I don't respect them. 850 00:40:14,846 --> 00:40:18,459 It's just I don't, I don't have a heart for them. 851 00:40:18,763 --> 00:40:20,156 Like because that's why I, 852 00:40:20,156 --> 00:40:23,072 that's why I think I love so hard now. 853 00:40:24,813 --> 00:40:28,425 ♪ Don't wait for me, honey 854 00:40:29,470 --> 00:40:32,081 That's why I think I love so hard now, because... 855 00:40:33,430 --> 00:40:35,345 like people showing you, 856 00:40:35,345 --> 00:40:37,956 and that's the thing about our community now, 857 00:40:37,956 --> 00:40:39,958 is why the gay people can't love each other 858 00:40:39,958 --> 00:40:41,482 and they always fighting and da, da, da, 859 00:40:41,482 --> 00:40:42,744 because they don't grow up in homes 860 00:40:42,744 --> 00:40:44,006 where they teach you how to love. 861 00:40:44,006 --> 00:40:45,747 They just throw you out to the street. 862 00:40:46,443 --> 00:40:50,665 And you know, I had to learn as a adult, as a teenager, 863 00:40:51,535 --> 00:40:53,102 how to be in a adult world, 864 00:40:53,102 --> 00:40:56,279 and like dealing with different people. 865 00:40:56,279 --> 00:40:59,761 And like, that's why today I can't even date guys now 866 00:40:59,761 --> 00:41:01,937 because I've dealt with so many different men. 867 00:41:01,937 --> 00:41:06,811 It's just my brain is so connected to like work, 868 00:41:06,811 --> 00:41:09,988 work, work, work. If you don't have anything for me, I don't wanna deal with you. 869 00:41:10,772 --> 00:41:12,730 You can't do this for me, I don't wanna deal with you. 870 00:41:12,730 --> 00:41:14,558 Can't buy me this, I don't wanna deal with you. 871 00:41:14,558 --> 00:41:18,910 It's, it done got like that for me. 872 00:41:20,956 --> 00:41:23,306 ♪ You'll always be my heart 873 00:41:23,611 --> 00:41:26,004 Now I can laugh and kiki and ha-ha with them, 874 00:41:26,004 --> 00:41:29,225 but at the end of the day, 875 00:41:29,225 --> 00:41:32,228 I know what they did to me as a child. 876 00:41:32,881 --> 00:41:34,491 Like put me out on, like put me, 877 00:41:34,491 --> 00:41:36,058 pushed me to the streets like that. 878 00:41:36,058 --> 00:41:37,668 I can't be around them for too long. 879 00:41:37,668 --> 00:41:40,192 Like my brother now, I can't even look him in his face. 880 00:41:40,758 --> 00:41:42,368 Like I, I won't even look at him. 881 00:41:45,067 --> 00:41:50,594 So when trans, when us trans women out men, 882 00:41:52,335 --> 00:41:53,858 I'm not a big fan of that. 883 00:41:54,467 --> 00:41:59,560 Because you know, we have to make a living at the end of the day. 884 00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:03,564 A lot of us are secrets to many powerful people 885 00:42:03,825 --> 00:42:08,351 who pay our rent and you know, take care of us. 886 00:42:08,351 --> 00:42:12,834 And when you expose them, it just dries up the well. 887 00:42:13,182 --> 00:42:15,837 Girls like me, you know, we need that well 888 00:42:15,837 --> 00:42:18,274 to be plentiful, you know what I mean? 889 00:42:18,274 --> 00:42:20,624 So I'm not with exposing. 890 00:42:20,624 --> 00:42:23,322 I really don't appreciate when girls do that, 891 00:42:24,062 --> 00:42:26,848 or try to blackmail guys or you know, 892 00:42:26,848 --> 00:42:29,328 because that doesn't bring good karma, you know? 893 00:42:29,328 --> 00:42:31,853 And the end of the day they're suffering, 894 00:42:32,244 --> 00:42:34,029 because they're not living in their truth, 895 00:42:34,420 --> 00:42:36,945 and that's enough punishment as it is. 896 00:42:37,249 --> 00:42:39,338 They have to lay with that every night. 897 00:42:39,338 --> 00:42:42,820 By exposing them, you're not really getting anything. 898 00:42:42,820 --> 00:42:46,302 You're just ruining the game, and we're all in the game. 899 00:42:46,302 --> 00:42:49,261 It doesn't only affect you, it affects other girls too. 900 00:42:49,653 --> 00:42:52,482 ♪ I've got a man back at home ♪ 901 00:42:52,482 --> 00:42:56,094 ♪ He ain't worth a dime, but he's my own ♪ 902 00:42:56,573 --> 00:43:00,011 ♪ I ain't going broke with you, nigga please ♪ 903 00:43:00,272 --> 00:43:04,537 ♪ 'Bout to go and get myself a sugar daddy ♪ 904 00:43:04,842 --> 00:43:08,498 ♪ Don't tell me to get a job ♪ 905 00:43:08,933 --> 00:43:12,763 ♪ Look at me boy, I'm a star ♪ 906 00:43:13,068 --> 00:43:17,072 ♪ Woman go crazy out in these streets ♪ 907 00:43:17,072 --> 00:43:19,944 ♪ 'Bout to go and get myself a sugar daddy ♪ 908 00:43:19,944 --> 00:43:22,381 Liyah: Most of the time, like as trans women, 909 00:43:22,381 --> 00:43:26,037 we're not meeting the guy who's already this millionaire 910 00:43:26,037 --> 00:43:29,606 and they're taking us to the penthouse, and they're putting us up. 911 00:43:29,867 --> 00:43:32,304 Like no, we're meeting guy after guy, 912 00:43:32,304 --> 00:43:36,265 who's this is guy after guy who's in denial after denial. 913 00:43:37,005 --> 00:43:40,008 And so in no way are they there to protect us. 914 00:43:40,617 --> 00:43:43,664 They're there to exploit us, to fetishize us. 915 00:43:44,229 --> 00:43:46,971 And so whatever we face as a reality, 916 00:43:46,971 --> 00:43:50,714 once we leave that experience that benefited them, they don't give a fuck. 917 00:43:51,454 --> 00:43:53,761 But so many of us are caught up telling each other like, 918 00:43:54,065 --> 00:43:56,024 "Oh girl, don't worry about getting a job. 919 00:43:56,024 --> 00:43:57,721 Oh girl, don't pursue your real dream. 920 00:43:58,156 --> 00:44:00,811 Bitch, cause you can make a coin and that's gonna be easier." 921 00:44:01,333 --> 00:44:03,292 But they don't tell her how easy it is 922 00:44:03,553 --> 00:44:05,337 when you lose a sense of yourself, 923 00:44:05,686 --> 00:44:08,776 when the only thing you know of value to yourself 924 00:44:08,776 --> 00:44:10,299 is what a man put on you. 925 00:44:11,996 --> 00:44:14,477 And that's not healthy, that's not reality. 926 00:44:14,477 --> 00:44:17,654 Like, and I'm not shaming it, I'm not shunning it. 927 00:44:17,654 --> 00:44:20,744 I'm not saying that it didn't work for me, it did. 928 00:44:21,266 --> 00:44:24,400 It gave me some of the greatest experiences of my life. 929 00:44:24,400 --> 00:44:26,968 It even taught me value from a man, okay? 930 00:44:26,968 --> 00:44:29,187 Because I walked in playing cheap cunt, 931 00:44:29,666 --> 00:44:32,756 and he threw stacks on my ass, you know? 932 00:44:32,756 --> 00:44:35,237 And so, so at one point I would even be the person 933 00:44:35,237 --> 00:44:39,023 to say, "Yes that's okay, get your coin, catch your bag," 934 00:44:39,328 --> 00:44:41,373 and I would've never told you to go get your knowledge. 935 00:44:45,856 --> 00:44:47,162 And that's fucked up. 936 00:44:47,771 --> 00:44:51,514 That's fucked up that we've normalized as a culture 937 00:44:51,514 --> 00:44:54,212 of whoever we are, whether it's cis women, 938 00:44:54,212 --> 00:44:56,649 whether we trans women, whether we goddamn 939 00:44:56,649 --> 00:44:59,652 just motherfucking survivors in the hood, okay? 940 00:44:59,652 --> 00:45:03,091 We've normalized letting grown men take advantage of our bodies. 941 00:45:04,614 --> 00:45:06,834 But we all out here motherfucking preaching, 942 00:45:06,834 --> 00:45:09,750 "Women lives matter, trans lives matter." 943 00:45:10,141 --> 00:45:13,144 Bitch, how much do we really matter when we know 944 00:45:13,144 --> 00:45:14,450 that we are still seeing each other 945 00:45:14,450 --> 00:45:16,321 right after that motherfucking protest 946 00:45:17,279 --> 00:45:19,194 in the hands of the man that could kill us, 947 00:45:19,803 --> 00:45:21,152 all because of survival? 948 00:45:22,066 --> 00:45:23,633 For what I'm going, I'm supposed to tell people, 949 00:45:23,894 --> 00:45:26,592 "Oh this shit is cool, this shit is safe"? 950 00:45:27,768 --> 00:45:31,641 Nah, that's not like, don't let no motherfucking fancy thing 951 00:45:31,946 --> 00:45:33,817 that gets in front of you confuse you 952 00:45:33,817 --> 00:45:35,427 as to what the fuck this is. 953 00:45:35,819 --> 00:45:39,823 This is survival work, this is risky shit. 954 00:45:39,823 --> 00:45:42,826 This is putting your hands in the life of a man 955 00:45:42,826 --> 00:45:45,307 that don't know shit about you. 956 00:45:46,090 --> 00:45:47,875 And the only thing he there for 957 00:45:48,397 --> 00:45:51,182 is escaping his own goddamn reality. 958 00:45:51,182 --> 00:45:53,097 And you know what that reality is? 959 00:45:53,097 --> 00:45:55,273 Ten times better than the one he's giving you. 960 00:45:56,492 --> 00:45:59,887 A lot of girls don't make it out of it, to be honest with you. 961 00:45:59,887 --> 00:46:02,280 A lot of girls do not make it out of it. 962 00:46:02,672 --> 00:46:05,544 'Cause I've almost been killed like two to three times. 963 00:46:05,544 --> 00:46:08,243 Like just to even still be here, 964 00:46:08,243 --> 00:46:10,419 like all my girlfriends are dead and gone. 965 00:46:11,115 --> 00:46:12,987 All my girlfriends are dead and gone. 966 00:46:13,248 --> 00:46:15,511 Yes from sex, all my girlfriends. 967 00:46:15,903 --> 00:46:18,819 One HIV, one, two clients killed. 968 00:46:20,472 --> 00:46:22,257 Two of my girlfriends killed by clients. 969 00:46:23,127 --> 00:46:24,999 [gunshot blasting] 970 00:46:26,914 --> 00:46:29,090 One of the killers got out by, 971 00:46:29,090 --> 00:46:31,962 they charged him with manslaughter, said that she tricked him. 972 00:46:31,962 --> 00:46:32,920 [gunshot blasting] 973 00:46:33,616 --> 00:46:36,358 And my other homegirl killed on Candler Road in Decatur. 974 00:46:36,358 --> 00:46:37,272 [gunshot blasting] 975 00:46:39,709 --> 00:46:41,711 Daniella: Whoever the killer was she let him in, 976 00:46:41,711 --> 00:46:42,799 it was a client. 977 00:46:43,321 --> 00:46:45,497 'Cause her last calls was, "How much did you have?" 978 00:46:45,976 --> 00:46:49,371 And you just gotta be careful, 'cause like I don't, 979 00:46:49,371 --> 00:46:50,894 like people done came after me. 980 00:46:50,894 --> 00:46:53,157 Like, and then when you put your pictures, 981 00:46:53,157 --> 00:46:54,811 your numbers, your locations on the internet, 982 00:46:55,246 --> 00:46:57,292 you got people all, from all around the world 983 00:46:57,292 --> 00:47:00,686 is watching you, and you gotta understand that 984 00:47:00,686 --> 00:47:02,645 and you have to be open for that like... 985 00:47:06,823 --> 00:47:08,390 And you have to know how to protect yourself. 986 00:47:08,390 --> 00:47:11,567 Like, I had to learn all of that. 987 00:47:11,567 --> 00:47:15,005 But like coming outta high school, I didn't even have a education. 988 00:47:16,528 --> 00:47:18,139 I didn't, when I came outta high school, 989 00:47:18,139 --> 00:47:20,141 I didn't even know how to read. I didn't know how to write. 990 00:47:20,141 --> 00:47:22,795 I didn't know how to really do a lotta shit, 991 00:47:22,795 --> 00:47:23,840 and they still graduated me. 992 00:47:24,362 --> 00:47:26,974 I still walked across that stage and got my diploma, 993 00:47:26,974 --> 00:47:27,931 and da, da, da, da. 994 00:47:28,279 --> 00:47:30,629 But I didn't know how to do a lot of shit, 995 00:47:30,629 --> 00:47:33,154 and like being in the sex work taught me a lotta shit, 996 00:47:33,154 --> 00:47:35,808 like my math and all that. 997 00:47:35,808 --> 00:47:38,724 The shit that I need to know to survive, for real. 998 00:47:39,334 --> 00:47:41,423 Like, but I did what I had to do to survive, so. 999 00:47:41,727 --> 00:47:43,947 'Cause nine times outta 10 what you did doing, 1000 00:47:43,947 --> 00:47:46,428 the monkey flips, the dog tricks for, 1001 00:47:47,124 --> 00:47:48,821 there's a woman that he respects, 1002 00:47:48,821 --> 00:47:50,780 that he says he respects her value, 1003 00:47:51,433 --> 00:47:56,917 and allows her to lay in his home that he provides for, and gives her the world. 1004 00:47:57,569 --> 00:48:00,137 But come to our rinky-dink-ass apartments, 1005 00:48:00,659 --> 00:48:03,184 our so-called hood-ass environments, 1006 00:48:03,184 --> 00:48:05,099 where they women won't even come to. 1007 00:48:05,577 --> 00:48:07,753 Why they women feel disrespected? 1008 00:48:08,711 --> 00:48:11,583 Because they gotta come here in these environments to escape. 1009 00:48:12,671 --> 00:48:15,979 And we, but we've normalized that being degraded, 1010 00:48:15,979 --> 00:48:19,069 being devalued, not realizing that this man 1011 00:48:19,809 --> 00:48:23,030 is bringing pocket change, okay? 1012 00:48:23,465 --> 00:48:27,251 To my real fucking reality, thinking it's doing something. 1013 00:48:27,251 --> 00:48:30,602 And because I'm so goddamn oppressed, okay? 1014 00:48:30,863 --> 00:48:32,953 I'm letting this rich man come give me, 1015 00:48:32,953 --> 00:48:35,433 uh, pennies of his investment, okay? 1016 00:48:35,433 --> 00:48:37,044 And in any other woman's life, 1017 00:48:37,740 --> 00:48:39,524 and make me think I'm grand from that? 1018 00:48:40,047 --> 00:48:41,700 Make me think I'm safe from that? 1019 00:48:41,962 --> 00:48:44,181 'Cause why is it that a woman got a suck a dick 1020 00:48:44,181 --> 00:48:45,835 to be able to go to Benihana's? 1021 00:48:45,835 --> 00:48:48,098 [gentle whistling music] 1022 00:48:48,098 --> 00:48:49,099 Daniella: Why is it? 1023 00:48:49,447 --> 00:48:50,927 A lot of bitches at Benihana's won't say it, 1024 00:48:51,928 --> 00:48:53,974 but why is it you had to suck a dick to get there? 1025 00:48:54,496 --> 00:48:55,976 Oh, and to the independent bitch, 1026 00:48:56,846 --> 00:48:59,892 who you didn't have to do it, kudos to you, sis. 1027 00:49:00,328 --> 00:49:02,939 You had agency, you had resource. 1028 00:49:04,158 --> 00:49:06,595 But you know what a lot of us motherfuckers on the other side 1029 00:49:06,595 --> 00:49:08,945 of this Benihana's experience had to go through? 1030 00:49:09,772 --> 00:49:12,427 A lack of agency, a lack of resource. 1031 00:49:12,949 --> 00:49:16,257 And the only resource we had was to the men, okay? 1032 00:49:16,257 --> 00:49:19,260 That fetishized us to get us to the table. 1033 00:49:20,870 --> 00:49:24,482 So my bad if my glamour has had to come through sucking a dick to get there. 1034 00:49:25,222 --> 00:49:30,010 My bad if me being real enough to not wanna be in my hood and be limited to that reality, 1035 00:49:30,314 --> 00:49:32,186 and I had to put myself in that position 1036 00:49:32,186 --> 00:49:33,361 to sit next to you. 1037 00:49:34,101 --> 00:49:35,580 My bad. 1038 00:49:35,580 --> 00:49:37,582 My bad if that's how it makes you feel 1039 00:49:37,582 --> 00:49:39,019 when you are uncomfortable around me. 1040 00:49:39,976 --> 00:49:42,848 But know that my money, that my swipe 1041 00:49:43,762 --> 00:49:46,635 has the same motherfucking value as your sacrifice 1042 00:49:46,635 --> 00:49:48,376 to start your Fortune 500, 1043 00:49:48,854 --> 00:49:50,726 to start your cornerstone business. 1044 00:49:52,032 --> 00:49:54,034 'cause all it is is two different sacrifices, 1045 00:49:55,122 --> 00:49:56,949 and I used my body unfortunately, 1046 00:49:56,949 --> 00:49:58,255 and you used your brain. 1047 00:49:59,082 --> 00:50:01,302 But you know what? We were just two ambitious women 1048 00:50:01,302 --> 00:50:03,130 trying to ultimately achieve a goal. 1049 00:50:10,180 --> 00:50:14,228 ♪ [singing in French] 1050 00:50:22,540 --> 00:50:25,978 Yeah, I grew up in a small town, Hiram, Georgia, 1051 00:50:26,327 --> 00:50:27,415 real little country town. 1052 00:50:27,763 --> 00:50:29,939 Grew up with both of my parents in the household, 1053 00:50:31,288 --> 00:50:35,075 and I grew up in church. My dad never went to church, 1054 00:50:35,075 --> 00:50:36,989 but my mom always had us in church 1055 00:50:36,989 --> 00:50:38,948 every Sunday and Wednesday night and all that. 1056 00:50:40,123 --> 00:50:44,345 I had a, you know, the all-American upbringing, 1057 00:50:44,345 --> 00:50:46,869 I guess. I always had girlfriends. 1058 00:50:48,479 --> 00:50:51,134 You know that's, it's a pretty normal life. 1059 00:50:51,526 --> 00:50:55,747 And after, I don't know why, after all this time 1060 00:50:55,747 --> 00:50:59,055 I found myself attracted to this one particular trans girl... 1061 00:51:00,752 --> 00:51:03,886 you know, after the norm for so long. 1062 00:51:04,234 --> 00:51:07,716 What I'm doing right now, like a lot of niggas are scared 1063 00:51:07,716 --> 00:51:08,891 to do and would never do. 1064 00:51:09,152 --> 00:51:11,241 I know they're just waiting on somebody to, 1065 00:51:12,895 --> 00:51:14,505 to say what I'm saying so they can 1066 00:51:14,505 --> 00:51:16,116 feel better about themselves. 1067 00:51:16,464 --> 00:51:19,162 And I haven't, I haven't even had an experience. 1068 00:51:19,162 --> 00:51:20,859 I'm just admitting to an attraction. 1069 00:51:21,512 --> 00:51:23,514 One of the things that gave me the courage to do this 1070 00:51:23,514 --> 00:51:27,083 is I think about so many people I know 1071 00:51:27,083 --> 00:51:29,433 that are actually acting on their attraction 1072 00:51:29,433 --> 00:51:32,175 and getting caught and still lying about it, 1073 00:51:32,175 --> 00:51:34,046 and still like in denial about it. 1074 00:51:34,308 --> 00:51:37,702 So I was like, it made it easier for me 1075 00:51:37,702 --> 00:51:41,358 to just say I have an attraction to somebody. 1076 00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:45,536 At this point we are at a good place, 1077 00:51:46,320 --> 00:51:51,977 and I definitely look at her now as more than just a sex object. 1078 00:51:51,977 --> 00:51:57,374 I definitely have gained some kinda feelings for her. 1079 00:52:00,203 --> 00:52:01,900 I don't know where it's going or, 1080 00:52:03,032 --> 00:52:05,034 I mean we still haven't met or whatever, 1081 00:52:05,382 --> 00:52:08,516 but I definitely look forward to hearing from her 1082 00:52:09,169 --> 00:52:12,302 at some point every day, you know? 1083 00:52:12,824 --> 00:52:13,956 And we, and I'm just, 1084 00:52:13,956 --> 00:52:16,350 I'm just enjoying getting to know her. 1085 00:52:17,089 --> 00:52:19,135 Lexx: When we was growing up, we was always taught, 1086 00:52:19,135 --> 00:52:21,050 - you can't be like this... - Tarxan: Can't accept that. 1087 00:52:21,050 --> 00:52:22,660 You can't be that way. You, fuck that shit. 1088 00:52:22,660 --> 00:52:24,488 You know, "None of my sons, and none of my nephews, 1089 00:52:25,185 --> 00:52:26,838 and none of my brothers gonna be that way," so. 1090 00:52:26,838 --> 00:52:28,710 I seen a lot of, you know, people, 1091 00:52:29,014 --> 00:52:32,235 homosexual or transsexual people get picked on. 1092 00:52:32,235 --> 00:52:34,063 I seen a lot, just because of who they was 1093 00:52:34,063 --> 00:52:36,805 or you know, how they looked. 1094 00:52:37,109 --> 00:52:38,241 It was just something, 1095 00:52:39,503 --> 00:52:41,636 It was just something they did and it wasn't, you know, 1096 00:52:41,636 --> 00:52:44,029 at the time, me being young, you know, 1097 00:52:44,334 --> 00:52:46,510 I didn't know how to feel about it, you know? 1098 00:52:46,510 --> 00:52:47,990 I didn't know if it was the right thing 1099 00:52:47,990 --> 00:52:50,514 to help or not help, but you know, it happens. 1100 00:52:50,514 --> 00:52:53,169 it's not accepted in gang life at all, in gang culture, 1101 00:52:53,169 --> 00:52:55,737 - that's the thing, like... - We're taught to procreate, 1102 00:52:55,737 --> 00:52:57,478 - you know what I mean? - Yeah, nobody... 1103 00:52:57,478 --> 00:52:59,131 Lexx: We need to be able to have our kids, 1104 00:52:59,131 --> 00:53:00,437 and our kids need to have kids. 1105 00:53:00,437 --> 00:53:03,092 So it's like, it starts boiling down to like, 1106 00:53:03,484 --> 00:53:06,226 a whole ideal way of like thinking and living your life. 1107 00:53:06,922 --> 00:53:08,750 So if that's what the old G's is teaching you, 1108 00:53:08,750 --> 00:53:10,839 if they teaching you to hate another person, 1109 00:53:10,839 --> 00:53:12,449 and they show you all this love, 1110 00:53:12,754 --> 00:53:15,104 when you young, that's what you gonna do. 1111 00:53:15,104 --> 00:53:16,845 You gonna hate who the people that love you 1112 00:53:16,845 --> 00:53:17,802 tell you to hate. 1113 00:53:18,194 --> 00:53:20,109 The Black experience has always been limited 1114 00:53:20,109 --> 00:53:22,111 to the way in which a white person 1115 00:53:22,111 --> 00:53:24,679 told us we could live, okay? 1116 00:53:25,157 --> 00:53:27,508 And we threaten that as Black trans people, 1117 00:53:28,073 --> 00:53:30,511 because what we're saying to Black people 1118 00:53:30,511 --> 00:53:33,340 who had been conditioned in that mindset, 1119 00:53:33,340 --> 00:53:35,255 that a Black man should be this way, 1120 00:53:35,646 --> 00:53:37,735 and a Black woman should be that way. 1121 00:53:37,735 --> 00:53:39,346 we're saying, "Fuck all that." 1122 00:53:40,085 --> 00:53:43,175 And we're basically saying, "I'm not 'bout to be 1123 00:53:43,175 --> 00:53:47,354 your good nigga, I'm not about to be your cute house nigga. 1124 00:53:47,354 --> 00:53:48,703 I'm 'bout to be me". 1125 00:53:49,094 --> 00:53:51,575 And I think so many of us as Black people, 1126 00:53:51,575 --> 00:53:54,186 whether we are rich or poor, we are always, 1127 00:53:54,186 --> 00:53:56,232 especially in front of white people, 1128 00:53:56,232 --> 00:54:00,105 we always trying to figure out, is it okay to be the field nigga, 1129 00:54:00,105 --> 00:54:01,716 or do we gotta be the house nigga? 1130 00:54:01,716 --> 00:54:06,155 You know, and for trans people 1131 00:54:06,634 --> 00:54:08,549 we're interrupting that in itself, 1132 00:54:09,027 --> 00:54:11,073 because we're saying we can't be in the field, 1133 00:54:11,073 --> 00:54:13,336 because there's nobody in the field that accepts us. 1134 00:54:13,858 --> 00:54:15,077 We can't be in the house, 1135 00:54:15,077 --> 00:54:17,340 so there's nobody there to accept us. 1136 00:54:17,340 --> 00:54:19,386 So we gotta always play the in between, 1137 00:54:19,386 --> 00:54:22,606 trying to find our house or field, you know? 1138 00:54:22,606 --> 00:54:25,740 And I, and I use that language in particular 1139 00:54:25,740 --> 00:54:30,005 because it all to me goes back to slave mentality, okay? 1140 00:54:30,005 --> 00:54:33,530 Because it never, I've never understood this shit, okay, 1141 00:54:33,922 --> 00:54:35,924 as Black people, how we could do this shit. 1142 00:54:37,012 --> 00:54:40,320 We all scream the narrative that we oppressed, 1143 00:54:40,668 --> 00:54:43,801 that we all bound by the white man, 1144 00:54:44,193 --> 00:54:45,890 but we're the first motherfuckers 1145 00:54:45,890 --> 00:54:46,891 to turn our nose up 1146 00:54:47,631 --> 00:54:50,634 to the next person who wanna stand out and be different. 1147 00:54:50,634 --> 00:54:52,810 Okay, like we are literally the first 1148 00:54:52,810 --> 00:54:55,073 fucking group of people to do it to each other. 1149 00:54:55,465 --> 00:54:57,467 So the same way the white man won't accept you, 1150 00:54:57,815 --> 00:54:59,382 now 'cause I come with my Blackness 1151 00:54:59,382 --> 00:55:02,777 and presenting it in a trans way, now you can't accept me? 1152 00:55:03,038 --> 00:55:05,214 In the eyes of the white man we all niggas, 1153 00:55:05,214 --> 00:55:06,998 whether I show up as a man in a wig, 1154 00:55:06,998 --> 00:55:09,610 or you show up just as a man, okay? 1155 00:55:09,871 --> 00:55:11,612 You a nigga, and that's it, period. 1156 00:55:11,916 --> 00:55:14,832 We motherfucking hurt people hurting people, but we, 1157 00:55:14,832 --> 00:55:17,792 it's just very few of us out there, okay, 1158 00:55:17,792 --> 00:55:21,448 very few who got a little change in our pocket. 1159 00:55:21,796 --> 00:55:23,450 Think we better than the next one. 1160 00:55:23,928 --> 00:55:25,626 And now all of a sudden we should define 1161 00:55:25,626 --> 00:55:27,497 what a Black man or woman should be? 1162 00:55:28,411 --> 00:55:29,369 Kiss my ass. 1163 00:55:29,891 --> 00:55:35,157 - [singers chanting] - [rhythmic percussion music] 1164 00:55:55,525 --> 00:55:57,092 My name is Lenox Love, 1165 00:55:57,092 --> 00:56:00,225 and I'm the CEO of Lenox Love Entertainment. 1166 00:56:02,227 --> 00:56:04,404 I promote events that features 1167 00:56:04,404 --> 00:56:07,929 transgender dancers and entertainers. 1168 00:56:08,756 --> 00:56:13,630 How I started Hush Night is ultimately I'm, I am trans attracted. 1169 00:56:13,630 --> 00:56:16,285 I do like trans women as well as women, 1170 00:56:16,285 --> 00:56:18,374 I like all women, all women. 1171 00:56:18,374 --> 00:56:24,772 Back in 2003 I was fresh outta high school, 1172 00:56:25,294 --> 00:56:29,559 but I wanted to try to meet trans women. 1173 00:56:29,559 --> 00:56:30,647 And the only place in Atlanta 1174 00:56:30,647 --> 00:56:32,214 that you could meet trans women 1175 00:56:32,214 --> 00:56:34,085 was on the stroll, as they say. 1176 00:56:34,085 --> 00:56:36,131 I've always thought that was kinda degrading, 1177 00:56:36,914 --> 00:56:37,828 at least for the guy, 1178 00:56:38,438 --> 00:56:42,311 and I'm pretty sure for the trans woman herself. 1179 00:56:42,659 --> 00:56:46,794 But and I've, and I never really meshed well 1180 00:56:46,794 --> 00:56:50,232 with just in a all-out LGBT club. 1181 00:56:50,798 --> 00:56:53,757 So I thought it would be a great atmosphere 1182 00:56:53,757 --> 00:56:56,804 to have it in like a stripper atmosphere, 1183 00:56:56,804 --> 00:56:59,720 instead of a drag show and stuff like that. 1184 00:56:59,720 --> 00:57:01,722 Because like I said it is, it's a little bit different. 1185 00:57:01,722 --> 00:57:04,246 The drag show is different than an actual stripper. 1186 00:57:05,465 --> 00:57:09,730 So this is a place where you can get your rappers, 1187 00:57:09,730 --> 00:57:13,603 your regular guys, your hood guys, the trade trade. 1188 00:57:14,212 --> 00:57:16,301 I mean the trade, bitch, if you really wanna 1189 00:57:16,301 --> 00:57:18,478 get some trade without being out in the streets 1190 00:57:18,478 --> 00:57:21,045 and no judgment, this is the place to come. 1191 00:57:21,045 --> 00:57:24,745 Because Hush Night is like for the girls 1192 00:57:24,745 --> 00:57:26,616 that wanna come and get the trade. 1193 00:57:26,616 --> 00:57:29,706 Like bitch, the trade is no, like they all in the building. 1194 00:57:30,141 --> 00:57:31,665 Like, and it's no fucking judgment, 1195 00:57:31,926 --> 00:57:34,145 and you can do whatever the fuck you want. 1196 00:57:34,145 --> 00:57:36,800 Like they got like private rooms and stuff like that, 1197 00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:40,500 and you can fuck and you can suck, and whatever you wanna do, 1198 00:57:40,500 --> 00:57:43,024 but be safe and be clean and keep it discreet. 1199 00:57:44,112 --> 00:57:47,071 I've even seen like professional athletes inside of here before. 1200 00:57:55,079 --> 00:57:57,908 ♪ Too many empty encounters 1201 00:57:58,866 --> 00:58:02,347 ♪ So much I sort of lost track of all the men ♪ 1202 00:58:09,485 --> 00:58:11,226 ♪ All the many men I like 1203 00:58:11,226 --> 00:58:13,837 ♪ Just take advantage of me 1204 00:58:16,013 --> 00:58:19,190 ♪ I know I didn't mean anything ♪ 1205 00:58:24,282 --> 00:58:28,199 ♪ You see I did it, but I never did it in love ♪ 1206 00:58:39,950 --> 00:58:42,953 Liyah: I want out, I need something else to do, 1207 00:58:43,606 --> 00:58:45,521 because I don't realistically know 1208 00:58:46,696 --> 00:58:49,873 or see how long that I can see myself doing this. 1209 00:58:49,873 --> 00:58:51,571 And it's like, in this game, 1210 00:58:54,661 --> 00:58:56,401 bitch, either you get out of it, 1211 00:58:56,880 --> 00:58:58,621 or you end up dead, you end up popped, 1212 00:58:58,621 --> 00:58:59,666 and that's just how it is. 1213 00:59:01,668 --> 00:59:04,975 [sweet gentle music] 1214 00:59:12,548 --> 00:59:15,116 And I know that I have more potential to do better. 1215 00:59:18,075 --> 00:59:20,121 I have a good, I have a great personality. 1216 00:59:20,121 --> 00:59:22,210 A lot of people know me for my personality. 1217 00:59:22,602 --> 00:59:24,865 I feel like I have so much more, more potential. 1218 00:59:24,865 --> 00:59:27,781 And I feel like so many other trans women have so much more potential. 1219 00:59:28,216 --> 00:59:30,653 ♪ Ooh, ooh 1220 00:59:30,958 --> 00:59:32,655 ♪ Ooh ♪ 1221 00:59:33,221 --> 00:59:35,789 Unfortunately because of the society that we're in, 1222 00:59:36,528 --> 00:59:39,575 and the way that jobs are set up for trans women, 1223 00:59:40,054 --> 00:59:41,621 it's hard to get out the game, you know? 1224 00:59:42,099 --> 00:59:43,623 For some girls, it's all that they have. 1225 00:59:44,319 --> 00:59:47,757 [gentle thoughtful music] 1226 00:59:52,893 --> 00:59:56,679 Personally for me, my dream is to make it outta sex work, 1227 00:59:57,288 --> 01:00:01,466 and to put my abilities into something else. 1228 01:00:02,293 --> 01:00:03,599 I just wanna try something different. 1229 01:00:03,599 --> 01:00:05,122 I never learned anything else in life. 1230 01:00:05,383 --> 01:00:09,910 Like and I just, in my mind for a long time 1231 01:00:09,910 --> 01:00:13,043 I just depended on catching a client, catching a client. 1232 01:00:13,043 --> 01:00:14,218 I've been doing it all my life. 1233 01:00:14,697 --> 01:00:18,527 Like, I don't know nothing else, I don't know nothing else. 1234 01:00:18,832 --> 01:00:20,094 Like all I know is escorting, 1235 01:00:20,094 --> 01:00:22,009 and I wanna try to do something different. 1236 01:00:22,487 --> 01:00:25,926 And I was, probably with the money I was making, 1237 01:00:25,926 --> 01:00:28,276 I'm like, what else could I, I thought of, I, 1238 01:00:28,624 --> 01:00:30,321 it took years for me to even come up with this. 1239 01:00:30,321 --> 01:00:31,888 I'm like, "Well, what else can I do 1240 01:00:31,888 --> 01:00:33,498 to make the kind of money that I'm making 1241 01:00:33,498 --> 01:00:36,676 without doing something illegal?" 1242 01:00:36,980 --> 01:00:39,113 And then I done been to jail three times from this. 1243 01:00:39,809 --> 01:00:41,463 I done been to jail like three times. 1244 01:00:43,160 --> 01:00:44,466 The next time will be a felony. 1245 01:00:45,641 --> 01:00:48,165 If I can find something, another way to make my money 1246 01:00:48,557 --> 01:00:51,299 the way I, as much money as I'm making 1247 01:00:51,299 --> 01:00:55,782 in the escort industry, I'll do it. 1248 01:00:55,782 --> 01:00:57,784 And the music was the first thing that came to my mind. 1249 01:00:57,784 --> 01:01:00,743 So I was like, "Well, if I can get my music out there." 1250 01:01:02,266 --> 01:01:04,747 And then like seeing other trans girls on reality shows 1251 01:01:04,747 --> 01:01:07,402 and stuff like that, kinda brought attention. 1252 01:01:07,402 --> 01:01:08,969 Like, I kind of gave up. 1253 01:01:08,969 --> 01:01:10,710 So I'm just like, "They don't wanna hear no trans girl, 1254 01:01:10,710 --> 01:01:11,972 they don't wanna see a trans girl." 1255 01:01:12,668 --> 01:01:16,150 And then when I kind of seen some girls on reality shows 1256 01:01:16,150 --> 01:01:17,847 and stuff like that, kinda gave me life. 1257 01:01:18,195 --> 01:01:22,025 So I'm just like, if I can use the music to get, 1258 01:01:22,025 --> 01:01:24,767 to reach the people. 1259 01:01:25,899 --> 01:01:27,552 And I really don't want nothing from it, 1260 01:01:27,552 --> 01:01:29,685 like I really don't want, 1261 01:01:29,685 --> 01:01:31,600 if I make money from it, it's fine. 1262 01:01:32,253 --> 01:01:35,299 But I really wanna just send a message, 1263 01:01:35,299 --> 01:01:36,561 and I want them to hear me. 1264 01:01:37,475 --> 01:01:38,781 I want them to be able to hear me. 1265 01:01:39,129 --> 01:01:41,784 And for the girls that can't speak, 1266 01:01:42,219 --> 01:01:43,177 I wanna be the girl that, 1267 01:01:43,743 --> 01:01:46,833 I wanna be the girl that speak for them, like honestly. 1268 01:01:47,398 --> 01:01:48,878 It's so crazy. I've been wanting 1269 01:01:48,878 --> 01:01:50,401 to tell my story for a long time. 1270 01:01:51,141 --> 01:01:54,754 [soft poignant music] 1271 01:01:55,667 --> 01:01:59,802 Because I want people to understand that it's okay. 1272 01:02:02,326 --> 01:02:04,851 Like when you push your child out to the, 1273 01:02:04,851 --> 01:02:06,417 not even push your child out, 1274 01:02:06,417 --> 01:02:10,334 'cause I can't say my mom pushed me out, but just being, 1275 01:02:11,248 --> 01:02:14,121 just being something that you was born to be. 1276 01:02:14,121 --> 01:02:17,777 Like how could people look down on you 1277 01:02:17,777 --> 01:02:23,086 and say things to, to make it not, people, 1278 01:02:23,783 --> 01:02:25,741 I cannot believe how the world make you think 1279 01:02:25,741 --> 01:02:30,441 that you've done something wrong, if you came out gay, 1280 01:02:30,441 --> 01:02:34,576 or you know, as a boy being feminine. 1281 01:02:34,576 --> 01:02:37,231 They make you, they make you think that you're one way. 1282 01:02:37,579 --> 01:02:40,495 Like, it's fucking ridiculous, and I'm sick of it. 1283 01:02:40,756 --> 01:02:43,585 It's so funny that when we try to understand 1284 01:02:43,585 --> 01:02:46,283 why we can't have relationships with the Black community, 1285 01:02:46,806 --> 01:02:49,286 and it's, like in particular too, 1286 01:02:49,286 --> 01:02:51,680 like relationships with like Black women. 1287 01:02:51,941 --> 01:02:54,248 And like, I had to tell my mother this, 1288 01:02:54,248 --> 01:02:56,859 and I don't know if this could help, but it's, 1289 01:02:56,859 --> 01:02:59,688 I had to tell my mother that when I chose 1290 01:02:59,688 --> 01:03:01,908 not to be a Black man, and I transitioned 1291 01:03:01,908 --> 01:03:05,215 into what I believe is my Black womanhood, 1292 01:03:05,476 --> 01:03:08,044 you know, identifying as a Black trans woman, 1293 01:03:08,044 --> 01:03:11,482 I had to in some ways process with her 1294 01:03:11,787 --> 01:03:15,095 how it feels to lose another Black man again. 1295 01:03:16,531 --> 01:03:19,751 She was so used to losing Black men in her life, 1296 01:03:20,013 --> 01:03:22,929 because she wasn't able to have that so-called, 1297 01:03:22,929 --> 01:03:25,322 you know, traditional relationship, the way we see 1298 01:03:25,322 --> 01:03:27,194 so many of our white counterparts have. 1299 01:03:27,194 --> 01:03:31,328 So she already normalized being disposable, 1300 01:03:32,112 --> 01:03:35,680 and she was dependent on that Black child 1301 01:03:36,246 --> 01:03:38,727 to do everything her Black lover couldn't do. 1302 01:03:39,728 --> 01:03:45,038 And so she feels again abandoned by another Black man 1303 01:03:45,038 --> 01:03:48,519 when this Black son says, "I'm becoming a Black woman." 1304 01:03:49,869 --> 01:03:55,918 And I think that that is, if I be real, that has to hurt. 1305 01:03:57,137 --> 01:03:59,052 That has to hurt as a Black woman 1306 01:03:59,052 --> 01:04:00,792 to be hurt by Black men, 1307 01:04:01,184 --> 01:04:04,405 then give birth to a Black man and he says, 1308 01:04:04,796 --> 01:04:06,624 "I'm not here to protect you. 1309 01:04:07,538 --> 01:04:11,847 I'm here to be in some ways just as vulnerable as you." 1310 01:04:12,848 --> 01:04:14,067 [soft thoughtful music] 1311 01:04:14,937 --> 01:04:18,854 Daniella: I think that's hard for a lot of Black women to accept. 1312 01:04:19,942 --> 01:04:22,640 And so when so many Black mothers stop expecting 1313 01:04:22,640 --> 01:04:27,776 their Black children to grow up and be essentially, 1314 01:04:28,385 --> 01:04:30,605 you know, those freedom fighters. 1315 01:04:31,475 --> 01:04:33,869 You know, because a Black woman don't know how to be Black woman 1316 01:04:33,869 --> 01:04:35,740 unless a Black man tell her she can be, 1317 01:04:36,219 --> 01:04:37,960 unless a white man give her the opportunity 1318 01:04:38,221 --> 01:04:40,832 to flourish and then become successful. 1319 01:04:40,832 --> 01:04:41,964 And then all of a sudden 1320 01:04:41,964 --> 01:04:43,661 she's now representing Black success. 1321 01:04:44,575 --> 01:04:47,143 So we are always existing around systems, 1322 01:04:47,143 --> 01:04:49,015 or who we should be for someone else. 1323 01:04:49,537 --> 01:04:51,843 And that's why Black women are so forceful 1324 01:04:51,843 --> 01:04:55,195 in trying to make their Black kids conform to that system. 1325 01:04:57,371 --> 01:05:03,029 And it's scary, it's scary that they would rather us 1326 01:05:03,333 --> 01:05:06,641 conform to a system that will kill us, 1327 01:05:07,816 --> 01:05:10,036 than to step outside of that system 1328 01:05:11,341 --> 01:05:15,955 and redefine our own lives in any way we can, 1329 01:05:15,955 --> 01:05:18,522 in order to live out a truth that allows us 1330 01:05:18,522 --> 01:05:22,222 to be our full self, our... reaching our fullest potential. 1331 01:05:22,744 --> 01:05:24,528 You know, Black women hasn't been able to do 1332 01:05:24,528 --> 01:05:26,313 that themselves without needing a Black man. 1333 01:05:27,618 --> 01:05:30,621 Let's be real, like there's so many we know, 1334 01:05:31,100 --> 01:05:33,537 but it started off with a man giving them an opportunity. 1335 01:05:33,537 --> 01:05:36,192 It starts off with some man having the access first. 1336 01:05:36,192 --> 01:05:37,846 It didn't just start off like, you know, 1337 01:05:37,846 --> 01:05:39,979 how many Madam CJ Walkers do we know? 1338 01:05:42,459 --> 01:05:44,722 And then once they become the Madam CJ Walkers, 1339 01:05:44,722 --> 01:05:46,376 how many of them are accessible? 1340 01:05:47,595 --> 01:05:51,991 So even the Black woman who learned how to love herself, 1341 01:05:51,991 --> 01:05:54,210 she's no longer accessible to teach that girl 1342 01:05:54,210 --> 01:05:57,126 in the community where I was raised how to love herself. 1343 01:05:57,648 --> 01:05:59,650 So I'm dealing with broken Black women. 1344 01:05:59,955 --> 01:06:01,739 I'm not dealing with liberated Black women, 1345 01:06:02,044 --> 01:06:03,524 because the liberated Black women 1346 01:06:03,524 --> 01:06:05,700 don't got time for the broken Black women. 1347 01:06:06,309 --> 01:06:08,355 They don't got time for the broken Black people. 1348 01:06:08,355 --> 01:06:11,401 "Oh, because I don't experience that," is how they look at it. 1349 01:06:12,141 --> 01:06:16,798 But remember this, the way you not experiencing it 1350 01:06:17,799 --> 01:06:19,670 is the way I'm experiencing it, 1351 01:06:20,715 --> 01:06:22,891 and what makes my shit so different? 1352 01:06:23,500 --> 01:06:26,373 Because I'm not carrying it out the way you want me to? 1353 01:06:27,504 --> 01:06:31,639 And now ask yourself, who are you and who are you really, 1354 01:06:31,639 --> 01:06:33,902 when God is gonna be the one to judge you? 1355 01:06:38,863 --> 01:06:41,127 Your man didn't even know I was transgender 1356 01:06:42,302 --> 01:06:44,086 and came ready to climb my hole, 1357 01:06:44,652 --> 01:06:46,306 giving me all my Black womanness, 1358 01:06:47,524 --> 01:06:50,092 but you still don't think we in this fight together. 1359 01:06:51,572 --> 01:06:55,097 it's weird, so weird how your man will climb your back 1360 01:06:55,097 --> 01:06:58,057 and climb my hole and see us both as equals, but you can't. 1361 01:07:02,148 --> 01:07:07,109 - [thoughtful music playing] - [birds tweeting] 1362 01:07:13,159 --> 01:07:15,944 [Liyah laughing] 1363 01:07:21,863 --> 01:07:23,995 ♪ I've been crying so long 1364 01:07:23,995 --> 01:07:26,824 ♪ I could fill a river basin 1365 01:07:27,564 --> 01:07:31,046 ♪ I feel the scorchin' heat on my back ♪ 1366 01:07:31,351 --> 01:07:33,657 ♪ I've been praying so long ♪ 1367 01:07:33,657 --> 01:07:36,443 ♪ That the good Lord come and take me ♪ 1368 01:07:36,965 --> 01:07:39,750 ♪ Death would be easier ♪ 1369 01:07:41,448 --> 01:07:43,841 ♪ Then raising someone else's child ♪ 1370 01:07:43,841 --> 01:07:46,148 ♪ While mine been sold away 1371 01:07:46,148 --> 01:07:48,542 ♪ The husband that you're laying with ♪ 1372 01:07:48,542 --> 01:07:50,283 ♪ Come night is raping me 1373 01:07:51,110 --> 01:07:53,242 ♪ You know the truth, it bothers you ♪ 1374 01:07:53,242 --> 01:07:55,114 ♪ You act like you don't see 1375 01:07:56,419 --> 01:07:59,466 ♪ But who gon listen to lil ol' me ♪ 1376 01:08:01,946 --> 01:08:03,905 ♪ Ain't I a woman 1377 01:08:05,124 --> 01:08:09,171 ♪ Mm, mm, ain't I a woman too ♪ 1378 01:08:09,737 --> 01:08:11,826 ♪ Cook your food, wash your clothes ♪ 1379 01:08:12,087 --> 01:08:15,656 ♪ Till my fingers bloody red and ♪ 1380 01:08:15,656 --> 01:08:19,355 ♪ Yet you treat me like I owe the debt ♪ 1381 01:08:19,789 --> 01:08:21,705 ♪ And I'm fed up, God knows ♪ 1382 01:08:22,010 --> 01:08:24,578 ♪ I done spent my whole life serving ♪ 1383 01:08:25,144 --> 01:08:28,582 ♪ Even freedom couldn't get my time back ♪ 1384 01:08:29,235 --> 01:08:31,888 ♪ From raising someone else's child ♪ 1385 01:08:31,888 --> 01:08:34,109 ♪ And mine been sold away 1386 01:08:34,109 --> 01:08:36,633 ♪ The husband that you're laying with ♪ 1387 01:08:36,633 --> 01:08:38,418 ♪ Come night still raping me 1388 01:08:39,070 --> 01:08:41,594 ♪ You know the truth, it bothers you ♪ 1389 01:08:41,942 --> 01:08:43,466 ♪ You act like you don't see ♪ 1390 01:08:44,423 --> 01:08:47,557 ♪ Who gon listen to lil ol' me ♪ 1391 01:08:49,994 --> 01:08:52,171 ♪ Ain't I a woman 1392 01:08:52,475 --> 01:08:56,914 ♪ Ain't I a woman too ♪ 1393 01:09:02,181 --> 01:09:06,185 ♪ Ain't I a woman too 1394 01:09:09,188 --> 01:09:12,713 [funky dance music] 1395 01:09:15,846 --> 01:09:16,891 It's like me. 1396 01:09:18,762 --> 01:09:23,376 It's big, but... and strong but soft on the inside too. 1397 01:09:23,897 --> 01:09:25,552 'Cause I'm soft and I'm delicate, 1398 01:09:26,901 --> 01:09:29,512 even though I've been broken down a lot. 1399 01:09:29,512 --> 01:09:31,645 But I'm still here. 1400 01:09:42,482 --> 01:09:45,441 ♪ Don't let the world get you down ♪ 1401 01:09:46,268 --> 01:09:48,705 ♪ Keep your head up high 1402 01:09:50,838 --> 01:09:53,319 ♪ Don't let your problems get you down ♪ 1403 01:09:54,407 --> 01:09:57,410 ♪ Lift your spirit to the sky 1404 01:09:59,542 --> 01:10:04,330 ♪ We are the fabulous children of the world ♪ 1405 01:10:07,768 --> 01:10:12,120 ♪ We are the children of the rainbow ♪ 1406 01:10:14,253 --> 01:10:15,819 ♪ We're fabulous 1407 01:10:24,698 --> 01:10:28,396 ♪ You're killing my sisters every day ♪ 1408 01:10:32,619 --> 01:10:38,102 ♪ You turn a blind eye and simply walk away ♪ 1409 01:10:38,929 --> 01:10:42,280 ♪ Ooh, I wonder why 1410 01:10:43,194 --> 01:10:45,545 ♪ Is beating me a crime 1411 01:10:45,545 --> 01:10:47,503 Crew member: Wit' yo' ugly ass. 1412 01:10:47,503 --> 01:10:49,548 Quit looking in the damn camera. 1413 01:10:49,548 --> 01:10:51,420 [laughing] I don't know what else to look at, 1414 01:10:51,420 --> 01:10:52,813 - I'm not sure... - Crew member: Her. 1415 01:10:52,813 --> 01:10:54,423 All right, I'll look at you. 1416 01:10:55,381 --> 01:10:57,252 ♪ Yes it's time 1417 01:10:57,252 --> 01:10:59,559 ♪ Don't let the world get you down ♪ 1418 01:11:00,429 --> 01:11:03,127 ♪ Keep your head up, keep your head up high ♪ 1419 01:11:03,519 --> 01:11:05,391 ♪ Ooh, talking to my sisters ♪ 1420 01:11:05,391 --> 01:11:07,870 ♪ Don't let your problems get you down ♪ 1421 01:11:08,742 --> 01:11:11,875 ♪ Lift your spirit to the sky 1422 01:11:13,834 --> 01:11:18,316 ♪ We are the fabulous children of the world ♪ 1423 01:11:19,927 --> 01:11:21,407 She couldn't take it, darling. 1424 01:11:21,972 --> 01:11:25,498 She was getting it, but that was cis-late, 1425 01:11:25,932 --> 01:11:28,239 dried ends kinda fish. 1426 01:11:30,111 --> 01:11:32,852 [laughing] 1427 01:11:35,464 --> 01:11:36,813 Dominique: Very Donna Summers. 1428 01:11:36,813 --> 01:11:39,033 ♪ Love to love you baby 1429 01:11:39,338 --> 01:11:41,775 ♪ Love to love you baby ♪ 1430 01:11:44,734 --> 01:11:45,909 ♪ Do, do, do, do 1431 01:11:45,909 --> 01:11:49,173 - I need a bump. - Crew member: Yes, right. 1432 01:11:50,261 --> 01:11:52,438 Trust, and a hee... and a sickening heel, 1433 01:11:52,438 --> 01:11:53,613 and be very, 1434 01:11:55,136 --> 01:11:57,617 - Look. - I see it. 1435 01:11:57,878 --> 01:11:59,488 ♪ Yeah ♪ 1436 01:11:59,488 --> 01:12:01,360 Baby, the trans girls, 1437 01:12:02,883 --> 01:12:06,102 the boys are coming to the yard, okay? 1438 01:12:06,843 --> 01:12:07,843 All of them. 1439 01:12:09,542 --> 01:12:10,977 They don't wanna admit it. 1440 01:12:13,284 --> 01:12:16,810 But they, they're comin' to the yard, babe. 1441 01:12:19,813 --> 01:12:22,381 ♪ Don't let the problems get you down ♪ 1442 01:12:23,207 --> 01:12:27,386 ♪ Lift your spirit to the sky, yeah ♪ 1443 01:12:28,387 --> 01:12:31,477 If I was a... be a A-list celebrity today, 1444 01:12:33,261 --> 01:12:35,655 I still would be, I think I would still be into sex work. 1445 01:12:36,611 --> 01:12:39,006 'cause I'm just not fucking for free, that's just, period. 1446 01:12:40,050 --> 01:12:41,486 I'm not, I'm not fucking for free. 1447 01:12:41,486 --> 01:12:43,402 I don't give a fuck if it's like, 1448 01:12:45,360 --> 01:12:48,057 if I was on the billboards, I'm still not fucking for free. 1449 01:12:48,319 --> 01:12:50,583 They gone pay me, I'm sorry. 1450 01:12:50,583 --> 01:12:53,324 [film clicking]