[soft ambient music]
-[wind gusting] -[fire crackling]
[ominous instrumental music]
[Beth] Bind, bed, bury. What is thy will?
Love has all the power,
lust will devour,
and the heart can never be still.
Bind, bed, bury,
Grant Feigen I will.
Love does devour,
lust grabs all the power
and my heart can never be still.
[tense instrumental music]
-[Vickie gasps] -[Beth shudders]
Deyan anay tasa Asmodeus.
-[whooshing] -[Beth sighs]
[Beth breathing heavily]
[ominous music rising]
[music fades out]
[bus engine roaring]
Welcome to Shithole,
population... who gives a fuck?
It's a bus stop, Vickie. What were you hoping for?
Uh... a drug dealer,
a sexy guy up to no good, I mean, I'm not picky.
You know, the bus station of a town
tells you a lot about a place.
Oh, yeah? Well, what's this one telling you?
-That people die here. -Vickie!
-That's in really bad taste. -Of boredom, Helen!
They die of nothing but boredom.
Well, I had cell service, but now... nada.
Beth's aunt said she'd meet us here.
Yeah, I'm not exactly worried about getting lost.
-What are you doing? -Planning my escape.
Who would expect anything different from the inventor
of the Double Dutch Exit?
Two middle fingers to the back of their head and I'm gone.
[vehicle approaching]
You guys lost? Is there someone here I can direct you to?
Uh, yeah. We're looking for the, uh... Gref House?
Ooh. What you want with the Gref House?
Nothing good happening over there.
Well, our friend Beth lived there.
Oh. The funeral.
Yeah, sorry to hear that.
Well, best get in and out of town as fast as you can.
I try and keep things copacetic around here,
but some folks ain't so friendly.
Thanks for the heads up, Officer...
-Jack. You can call me Jack. -Jack.
You want to head down that way.
You hang a left at the house with the sycamore tree.
It's got a sign out front, makes it clear as day.
[indistinct speaking over radio]
Do I know you, son?
-Can't see how. -Okay.
Well, have a great day.
My condolences about your friend.
-That was weird. -Yup.
-[birds chirping] -[eerie instrumental music]
[exhales sharply]
[gate creaking]
[gate clanking]
[Vickie] Beth lived here?
[Simon] I mean, it could use a new coat of paint.
[Helen] And possibly an exorcism.
[Simon] But the bones look good, and I love an old house.
I hope you mean bones metaphorically.
Hmm. Yeah, do I?
-Hmm. -Let's go explore.
Don't chicken out. You owe Beth.
I know.
[Stephanie] Welcome! Welcome.
-I'm sorry I didn't meet you. -No problem.
I was getting the house ready for you,
and I just lost all track of time.
-Simon. -Hi. Yeah.
Yeah. Beth always told me you were a fashion plate.
My condolences on the loss of your friend.
Thank you.
-Aww. -Thank you.
-And to you too. -Yeah. Thank you.
Come here.
Thank you for taking us in.
-We're really going to miss her. -Mm.
I owe it to Beth.
Beth was supposed to attend my funeral,
not the other way around.
Look at me, trapping you on the verandah.
Come in. Come in.
[indistinct whispering]
Whoa.
Thanks for suggesting we stay here, Stephanie.
But if it's too much, we could get a hotel.
-No bother at all. -No, no, no. Don't be silly.
You should stay here to be close to Beth.
It'd be what she wanted.
Besides, Cedar Grove isn't the most welcoming of places.
Yeah, you're the second person to tell us that today.
Old town, afraid of the new.
But you're only staying a couple of nights, right?
Just long enough to pay your respects,
and then scoot back to your regular lives.
I mean, sure. After the reading of Beth's will, of course.
She mentioned you in her will?
According to her lawyer, yeah.
Yeah, he reached out to all of us.
That's how we found out that Beth had...
Is that a problem?
-No. Just a surprise. -Right.
Uh, well, I'm... I'm sure you all have lots to process,
so... before I go, though...
...a little present.
My garden grows on the intersection
of two important ley lines.
They're conduits of the supernatural
and earthly energies.
My plants do some... strange things.
So I warn you, a little goes a long way.
-Thank you. Yeah. So much. -Oh. Yeah. Mmhm.
[Simon] Ahem.
Hey... It'd warm her heart, you being here.
She spoke about you most of all.
Oh.
Her one true love.
You're in touch with the universe.
[rising ambient music]
[receding footsteps]
Ugh. This place gives me the ick.
Uh, if you were serious, there is a motel in town.
-Ugh! -What?
Vickie's not the only one that gets to have an escape plan.
We'll be fine in this house for a couple of days.
It'll be good for us.
Um, sharing a bed?
With someone I'm also not fucking?
Yeah, hard pass.
[Helen] Well, I'm not sleeping alone.
I'm happy to bunk with Helen.
And someone can crash in here.
-Oh. -[Vickie] What?
[Paige] It's Beth's bedroom.
[tense sentimental music]
You don't think Beth did it in here, do you?
-[Paige] I don't know. -[Simon] I didn't want to ask.
My God, it's so Beth in here, you know?
Yeah.
Even after not seeing her for so long, it's like I can...
sense her.
Heh. Not depressing at all.
There are so many photos of us here.
[Helen] Hmm. She looks so happy.
[Vickie] No one puts up sad photos of themselves.
I should've stayed in touch.
I mean, I sent a couple of texts, but...
I wanted to visit her, but she wouldn't let me.
Yeah, she called and...
asked to meet me in person, but I...
I blew her off.
What did she want to talk about?
I don't know. I never gave her the chance to tell me.
Still, she didn't give you any indication
that she was gonna... you know?
We were on the phone for, like, five minutes.
I would've done something if she had.
-These are from you. -Yeah. From way back.
[Vickie] This makes no sense. Beth hated us.
-Not all of us. -You know what I mean.
After that night, after she walked in on...
...and then walked out on all of us.
And then, years later, she comes back here,
builds this shrine to our friendship,
and then, somehow, sweetly leaves us in her will?
It's a fair question.
It was probably the last time she was legitimately happy.
Yeah. I'll take the couch.
Ooh. I got dibs on the big one downstairs.
Fine. The bathtub. Anywhere but here.
[footsteps receding]
You okay to sleep in here, Helen?
-Yeah. -[Paige] I'll get my bag.
[footsteps receding]
[sighs]
[tense ambient music]
-Sorry. -No. It's okay.
-What? -Marry, fuck, kill.
Oh, my God, Beth. Come on.
Not that stupid game again, please.
Marry me...
and I'll fuck you.
And then what? Someone dies? No, thanks.
[Beth sighs]
We can fuck just fine
without anyone dying.
Hmm?
But marry. [sighs]
Call me old-fashioned, Grant,
I just...
I want to wait, okay?
Okay.
Ow.
-[creaking] -[indistinct whispering]
[indistinct whispering]
[lamp clattering]
[sighs] Fuck this shit.
[footsteps receding]
Cedar Grove might be weird as fuck,
but they make a good pie.
What was that game we always used to play at pizza nights?
Mm... fuck all your friends?
-Before that. -Marry, fuck, kill.
-Oh. -Right.
-Ding, ding, ding. -Beth was obsessed with it.
You know, she told me once it had roots
in some old Wiccan spell.
Come on. It's a mean and silly game.
-How could it be a spell? -Was it that the...
the repetition of marry, fuck, kill,
marry, fuck, kill, it...
summons something from the other side?
No, no, no. That's Bloody Mary.
You say it three times and she appears.
Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary.
Oh, no, no, no, I remember the original spell was
bed, bind, bury.
And it was both a love and a hate spell.
Love and hate. Boring. But bed, now that I can get into.
-You're so predictable. -Helen, you're up.
-Oh. -Marry, fuck, kill.
-Hmm. -No thinking, just say it.
Okay. Marry Simon.
-I'm honoured. -Um...
Fuck Paige.
And kill... Grant.
-Oh. -Ooh.
-Simon, you're up. -Ah, bah-bah-bah.
Hmm...
-Fuck Grant. -[Vickie] Obvious.
-Marry Helen. -Yes, please!
Mmhm. And kill Grant.
-[Paige] Yikes! -[Simon] Sorry.
-Vickie, you're up. -Vickie?
Um... Hmm.
-Well, I think I'd marry Helen. -Thank you!
-[Simon] Cute. -Fuck... probably myself.
-Yeah. I see that for you. -Wow. Classy.
-And I would so kill Grant. -Wow!
-[Helen] Three kills for Grant! -[Simon] Ouch.
Uh, Paige?
Um...
-I'd marry Simon. -Obviously.
-Fuck Helen. -Mm!
And, sorry, yeah, Grant.
-Kill, kill. -[laughing]
Wild how those votes have changed.
Yeah, I'm so surprised everyone wants to marry Mr. Moneybags.
Well, I'd like to think it's a little more than just that.
Wait. Simon chose to fuck and to kill Grant.
I mean, he's the only one here with a penis, so.
-He's my one fuck wonder. -[laughing]
Wait, you're saying it was a technicality?
Yeah.
Wow. Sorry, Grant.
You used to be on top, but now...
How the mighty have fallen!
[Grant] I guess it is true what they say.
Familiarity breeds contempt. Mm?
Yeah, I mean... I think the contempt we feel is
more around you breaking Beth's heart.
That's why we're all here, right?
Pretty sure it was you and Vickie
who got everyone fucked up, which led to a DL sex party.
Mm, yeah, one that you were more than welcome to join in on.
-True. -This isn't a joke.
Beth had a nervous breakdown,
and when she was finally allowed to come home
and lick her wounds, she slit her fucking throat.
-Y'all have a good night. -[Paige] Grant.
[footsteps receding]
We were Beth's entire world, so imagine the betrayal
she must have felt walking in on all of you.
Paige, stop!
Some people change, okay?
And some people stay exactly the same.
Like you, Paige.
You're still a judgmental bitch.
[tense instrumental music]
[Simon sighs]
[knocking]
You okay?
-Been better. -[both chuckle]
You're no worse than any of us.
It feels like I'm worse. Heh.
Or doing worse, I guess.
What I did to Beth...
I don't know.
I just can't escape remembering it,
being in this house,
around all of them.
-Forget them. Forget Beth. -[Grant chuckles]
Forget where we are.
-Okay? -Okay.
[soft instrumental music]
[rising ominous music]
[Paige sighs]
-[camera clicks] -[Helen] Don't mind me.
You just look so perfect, sitting there.
Hey, about what I said back there...
-I'm sorry. -Oh, don't be. You're right.
It wasn't just Grant's fault.
We all screwed over Beth by sleeping with him.
Well... except you.
-You're an angel. -[Paige sighs]
Don't believe me?
Look.
[soft whooshing]
What are all those?
Um... I d--
Maybe my lens is dirty?
No. [Helen chuckles]
-Maybe they were ghosts. -Oh, you!
[both laugh]
Can I say something that I'm...
probably gonna kick myself for saying
as soon as I sober up?
Please. Join the club.
I have a lot of regrets about that night.
Including one very, um...
selfish one.
Oh, yeah? What?
That you weren't there.
[footsteps receding]
[Grant and Vickie moaning]
-Wow. -Wow.
Well, that was a blast from the past.
Yeah, that was, uh, hot.
[Vickie laughs]
[sighs] God. I should feel guilty.
-Hmm? -But... nope. Nada.
-[both laugh] -Carpe diem, Beth.
And I only took Latin for, like, a month in high school,
so that might be a little less sex related than I think.
-Hey. -You called me Beth.
Come on. Don't be ridiculous right now.
It was a mistake, all right? It was an accident, Vickie.
Oh, way to go. You got my name in only two guesses.
-Come back to bed. Okay, Vickie? -Not really, no.
-You're a so-so fuck at best. -Oh, wow. Thanks.
Whatever. I'm over it, and I'm splitting.
[sighs] Okay. Where are you gonna go?
You can't just sleep in the tub.
[scoffs] No, idiot. I'm leaving.
I'm leaving.
The last bus for the city leaves in an hour.
I'll be on it by the time you're washing your sad little dick.
[scoffs] Fuckin' loser.
-[door creaks] -[Grant sighs]
[sighs] Fucking kidding me.
Creepy as fuck.
-[rustling] -[wood creaking]
[tense instrumental music]
[stone clattering]
[growling]
If this is a joke, it isn't fucking funny.
[growling]
[screaming]
-[groan] -[squelch]
[eerie instrumental music]
[Helen] Who leaves in the night without saying goodbye?
[Paige] Vickie does.
I'm sure she gave us all silent middle fingers.
She couldn't have waited eight hours to bury her friend?
I mean, the reading of the will alone should've kept her.
It's what Vickie does.
She'll probably ask us to email her all the details.
It's not like she wanted to be here.
Nobody wants to be here.
But it's the right thing to do.
The respectful thing.
[sighing]
-[eerie instrumental music] -[singers vocalizing]
[Paige sighs]
[Grant sighs]
[Grant exhales sharply]
[Grant groans]
Funerals are extra hard for people like us.
People like us?
I'm an empath.
You know, those with the gift.
-"Stephanie's Second Sight." -Just down the road, in town.
You have the sight too.
You're not yet in a clear relationship with your powers.
Powers? I don't have any powers.
You don't feel things? See things?
When Beth went off to college and met all of you,
she thought she'd finally escaped.
I did too.
Escaped from what?
The Grefs aren't just any old family.
We have a storied lineage,
one that's been ripped apart by tragedy for generations.
My brother disowned me
for standing by my niece.
I failed her, but I will not fail you.
You're susceptible to the dark arts, like she was.
When the funeral is over,
escape while you still can and promise never to come back.
Everything okay?
Yes.
We were just saying how...
peaceful she looks.
Yes, she really does.
Remember what I told you.
What was all that about?
Some bullshit about a family curse
and me having psychic powers.
-What? -And that we need to leave.
Ah, yes, which very conveniently gets us out of town right
before Beth's will is read.
I don't know. She seemed legit concerned, okay?
[Paige sighs]
Did you see her reaction when she found out about Beth's will?
Stephanie is playing you, Grant.
[sighs] Let's sit down.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
[soft unsettling music]
-[Grant sighs] -[door shuts]
-[Grant sighs] -We've mourned Beth's death.
I think it's time... we celebrate her life.
Couldn't hurt. [sighs]
Agreed. Anything to make this better.
-Paige? -Weed fucks me up.
Yeah. It's supposed to.
[Simon] More for us.
[laughing]
Paige, you are missing out, let me tell you.
No, I'm really not.
You guys remember that time you convinced Beth to do 'shrooms?
-Oh, God. Yeah. -Whoa.
She tripped super hard, didn't she?
She was really into UFOs then.
She drove me nuts with all that little green men shit.
She used to stand in our dorm room window,
praying to be abducted.
You remember when we convinced her that we were the aliens?
[laughing]
When we covered the common room in foil and made it look
like a medical experiment room on a space ship!
Yeah, and she kept asking to be probed.
[laughing]
She did not understand why that was so funny.
No, she could not figure it out.
-[laughing] -[Helen] Oh, God.
-[Helen] "Probe me!"
-[laughing] -[Helen] She could not...
[indistinct speaking]
[eerie instrumental music]
Oh...
[soft whooshing]
What?
[eerie instrumental music]
-[knob creaks] -[grunts]
[sighs]
[ladder creaks]
[eerie instrumental music]
Fuck.
Jesus! What the fuck?
What are you doing up here?
Me? What are you doing up here?
I followed you to make sure you were all right.
-You're high as a kite. -Yeah, I...
I don't know. I... just thought I saw something.
Like what?
Nothing. Just forget about it, okay?
You're not acting like it was nothing. What'd you see, Grant?
Not what... who.
It looked like it was Beth, okay?
I know what you're gonna say, it's the drugs and I'm stupid.
No. No, it's not stupid to me.
You two had something flawed but special, and this place...
it's like I can feel Beth everywhere, like...
like she wants us to know something... some secret?
This house is like a shrine to her.
Glad I'm not the only one.
Yeah, it's not easy. None of this is.
At least we have each other, right?
Yeah.
Whoa! What are you doing?
Shit. Uh... I'm super high right now.
-Sorry. It's-- -So?!
High, not high, this you all the time.
And you know...
the only reason you wanna get with me is
because I'm the only one who won't let you.
Hasn't your dick caused enough problems?
[footsteps receding]
[Helen] Okay, but I am not nearly as fancy as you.
No, but you did win the Most Promising New Artist Award.
-I saw it online. -It was not that big of a deal.
-It was a huge deal. -[Helen laughs]
[Helen] Compared to you, Mr. Junior Partner?
We're both doing great. Okay?
Yeah, but we're both not making six figures.
Yeah, you're right about that one for sure.
[Helen] What do you make in a year?
-[Simon] A lot. -[soft whooshing]
Not getting in on the cheque-measuring brag-a-thon?
Beth?
Am I...
How are you...
It's all right. Calm down.
Am I here or am I on the other side?
Or am I just a figment of your drugged-up imagination?
[Beth] Does it matter?
All that matters is you're far more than any of our friends.
[inaudible conversation]
[Beth sighs]
A true original.
Your thoughts and emotions run deep.
They always have.
Come, gaze at the moon with me.
Every group has a charismatic centre.
And it sure as hell isn't any of those duds in there.
[Grant chuckles] Nope.
Not even close.
Well, look at them all trying
to impress each other still.
"I'm an important artist."
"I make six figures in my designer suit."
Anybody who really matters...
doesn't give a shit about any of that stuff.
[soft instrumental music]
Like you.
[sighs]
You can just... be
in your power.
[sighs]
But when you have power like yours...
...you have to be careful who you wanna share it with.
[softly] You can't just unleash it to anyone.
[sighs]
They have to be able to take it.
[softly] I can take it, Grant.
I can take it all.
I thought you said you wanted to wait until you got married.
Shh.
Forget what I said before.
[softly] Give it to me.
Now.
-[Grant] Oh... -[Beth] Yes.
[both panting]
-[Beth] Give it to me. -[Grant groans]
Give it to me. [panting]
[demonic voice] Give it to me!
[groans]
What the fuck...
Oh.
[groaning]
-Milk? -Yes, please. Thank you.
-Mmhm. -Wow! It's alive.
We were wondering when you'd show up.
We couldn't find you anywhere.
[Grant] Yeah. I, uh...
crashed outside last night.
-[liquid pouring] -Ooh. Braver than me.
[scoffs] Yeah.
I'm pretty wrecked, though. You guys?
That pot is pretty potent.
But I don't think anything's potent enough
to have me out sleeping under the stars,
hanging a wang for the neighbours.
-[camera clicks] -Don't do that.
Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
Huh. Yeah.
Seriously. What's going on?
Um...
I, uh...
I saw Beth last night.
Yeah. And I didn't just see her.
We... talked, we...
I've seen things on pot before.
This was more than just seeing things, okay?
You're letting that crackpot Stephanie get to you.
[Simon] There's no such thing as ghosts or spells
or family curses.
Oh, yeah? Then how do you explain this?
[Helen] And this isn't the first one, either.
I keep getting these apparitions on my pictures
and it only started when we got to Cedar Grove.
It's called a coincidence.
You're so goddamn sure of yourself, aren't you?
In this instance, yes.
We're born, we die, and we try to fuck
as much as we can in between, and that's it.
Wow. Thank you so much for your TED Talk on the meaning of life.
[Simon] You guys know I'm right!
People always worry about this meaning of life bullshit.
Well, it's... it's simple.
You just get what you want now.
And that's what made you so successful?
Being ruthless, grabbing what you want by the balls?
Oh, yeah, what, as opposed to dropping out of college
after one stupid mistake?
Okay, okay. We don't need a testosterone-off, boys.
But I do need you all to eat up. The lawyer will be here soon.
Beth Gref, having no siblings or issue,
has left the entirety of her estate to those present.
I will now read the will.
"For her friendship, help and unwavering support,"
"I leave the land at Feragun Creek to my aunt,"
"Stephanie Gref."
Too kind. Far too kind.
"And all of my remaining assets, both liquid and otherwise,"
"including Gref House and everything inside it,"
"I leave to those who I hope will live the rest"
"of their lives there:"
-"Paige Ludlow..." -What?
"Helen Ellison, Simon Carpenter,"
"Vickie Kavanagh and Grant Feigen."
"May my house and the beds in it bind you all together"
"and bury the troubles that once tore us apart."
This can't be right.
I assure you, it was Beth's wish.
She made these changes weeks ago.
Translation: how dare she leave me some crappy old creek bed
and everything else to them?
Okay.
[tense instrumental music]
You stay here...
and Beth has signed your death warrants.
[footsteps receding]
It'll take a few days for the paperwork to go through,
but for all intents and purposes, welcome...
to your new home.
[Paige] Thanks.
[scoffs] Holy shit.
[both scoff]
[sighs]
[Simon] No signal. Again.
She's okay, right?
This small-fry town having no cell service
has nothing to do with Vickie.
Still, it's weird, her just leaving
in the middle of the night like that.
Have you met Vickie?
Sure, but... what if she wants to sell the house?
-What do we do then? -We don't have to keep it.
We could... buff it up, slap some new paint on it.
I don't know. I never thought I'd own a house.
Grant. You're awfully quiet.
Uh... Yeah, I guess I could do with starting over too.
Not that it did Beth any good.
Well, we don't have to decide tonight.
I mean, we can't until we get in touch with Vickie anyway.
Something tells me we haven't heard the last of Stephanie.
[Simon] Yeah.
I bet she thought all this would end up going to her.
So expect more "run for your lives" mumbo jumbo.
Beth left us this house and its contents.
-People like antiques. -Yeah, I like antiques.
But, uh, most of this crap is pretty run down.
Unless all the good stuff's locked away somewhere.
[clicking]
It's not the easiest kind of lock to pick, but...
I might be able to pull it off.
Would a coat hanger work?
-Mm. -You pick locks now?
Somebody took a dark turn after college.
Whatever.
-[whoosh] -Oh, Jesus! Jesus!
[Helen] What is it?!
I just saw someone in there.
And they were looking right back at me.
You saw someone in there?
Yeah, 'cause he smoked more of Stephanie's weed.
No, Simon. I didn't.
Whatever. Okay.
[exhales sharply]
[tense ambient music]
[Grant sighs]
[clicking]
-[door opens] -[Grant] Oh.
Whoa...
[Simon chuckles]
[Paige] Oh, wow.
Guys, this is, like... like, real silver.
Not just silver-plated.
[Grant] Think Beth knew all this was in here?
[Simon] I'm guessing yes, and that she wanted all of us,
or at least me, to have it.
[Helen] Ha! Some of this stuff... super creepy.
[Grant] Hey, what is that?
Looks like some sort of witch book.
[Grant] Oh, shit. "The Gref family."
"One of the original families."
"Descended from the necronomical sect"
"of Asmodeus."
"The Gref founded the Dark Tern in 1432"
"and are said to be the pre-eminent practitioners"
"of Soot, the long-lost art"
"of demonic jurisdiction."
Okay. What the fuck is a "necronomical sect"?
Ooh, necro's never good.
Super deathy.
I vote we sell this house.
Yeah, let's sell it as fast as we can and get the hell out.
It's the house... from way back when. Look.
"Abigail Gref left Prussia and built a new homestead"
"in Cedar Grove,"
"at the intersection of two particular ley lines."
-Are you kidding me, man? -This witch shit is getting old.
-[dramatic sound indication] -Holy shit.
Grant, it's you.
Hey, it must be a weird coincidence.
Coincidence?! That looks exactly like him!
This... this house must be built on one of those ley line things.
Maybe that's why my camera's been acting up.
Give me a break!
If we weren't all in this creepy ass house right now,
we'd all be laughing.
-[Helen scoffs] -I need some air. Yeah.
[footsteps receding]
[ominous sound indication]
-[footsteps approaching] -[knocking]
So? What happened back there?
[scoffs] Uh, well...
there's a photo that looks exactly like me
in some... fucked-up book that we found
in a room full of occult stuff
in the house where Beth killed herself.
Do you think I should be acting any different right now?
Well, the Grant I knew wouldn't be having trouble breathing
over a photo.
Hey. It's just a book.
[Grant sighs]
And you don't even look all that much alike.
Not really.
Your noses are different.
Oh, there's a crease in his forehead you don't have.
And most importantly,
this photo is over 100 years old.
And it was taken in Ireland.
Beth's family was from Germany.
Uh, he's not related to Beth.
Different family entirely.
His surname was...
Faodhagain.
No connection to Beth at all.
It's a fluke. Nothing else.
Yeah. Uh...
Sorry I was so, uh... dramatic back there.
Actually, watching cool-ass you finally lose your shit
like the rest of us this weekend?
It was kind of a relief.
[water dripping]
[sighs]
[soft whooshing]
If one of you assholes is about to run in here
and pour a bucket of ice water on me,
just know there will be hell to pay.
[soft whooshing]
Seriously, is someone there? 'Cause this shit isn't funny.
[tense instrumental music]
[chuckles]
Jesus.
Get a fucking grip, buddy.
[sighs]
[dramatic sound indication]
[muffled screaming]
[screaming]
Simon?
-Simon? -Was that one of you fuckers?!
-What? -Pulling me under!
I don't understand. You think one of us pulled you under?
-[sighs] -Without you seeing us?
[softly] Fuck.
[Paige sighs] You were saying?
You scared the shit out of us, man.
I--I swear, something grabbed me.
Lay off the weed, bro.
-[soft whooshing] -[scuttling]
Okay. You heard that, right?
Yeah... and it's not the first time.
What is it?
If I'm gonna get any sleep tonight,
I need to find out.
[footsteps receding]
-[Simon sighs] -[Helen] Creepy!
What, were you hoping for a spa?
It's an attic.
Creepy and cobwebs are guaranteed.
I hate you.
-After you. -Mm-mm.
-You first. -Oh, fine.
Oh, boy.
[unsettling instrumental music]
So... what exactly are we looking for here?
A mystical rat from the fifth dimension.
Look what we have here.
[Helen] Weird.
-You wanna hold this for me? -Yeah.
What...
-Oh, boy. -Watch out.
[sighs] Bet you there's a nest up there.
Huh.
Or maybe even Rat King.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
[Simon grunts]
-Oh, my God! -[Helen screams]
[Helen] Why is there a giant collection of bones
locked away in the attic?
I swear to God, if these things are fucking human...
Um... Yeah, these...
-These look human to me. -Oh, God.
This is part of a human skull.
And...
Huh. Interesting. This isn't human.
You're okay with this?! That looks demonic!
This is all probably just from a goat or something.
-Somehow, that makes it worse. -Yeah.
It's like a fucking sacrifice or something.
Yeah, like something Satanic.
Human bones, goat bones mixed together. Oh, God. Um...
-We need to tell the police. -About what?
A murder that happened a century ago?
You don't know that.
You don't wanna have to admit it,
but you know something's happened here.
Okay, sure. Listen.
There's lots of bones. Some human, some not.
It's--it's very weird,
but also very real things.
All right? Go ahead. Call the police, I guess.
-He's got a point, Helen. -Thank you.
With the dust and the cobwebs, whoever this is
was placed in here a long time ago.
It doesn't matter when it happened!
-Who would do this and why? -[Simon] Okay.
-Well, what do we do now? -We get the fuck out is what!
-Yeah. -The last bus left an hour ago.
And we're in the land that Uber forgot.
-And cell service, so. -There's a hotel in town.
-It's a motel. -I don't care if it's a hostel.
Anywhere is better than this.
-[footsteps receding] -[Simon sighs]
Yeah.
[ominous instrumental music]
-Are you fucking kidding me? -[Helen sighs]
-Okay, what do we do now? -Walk? Hitchhike?
Just get the hell out of here.
We can't walk the whole way home, Helen.
Who knows? Maybe the town jail's got some comfy beds.
I thought you guys would be gone by now.
We wanna be, Officer.
We're looking for a place to stay the night.
Well, there's no room at the town's only major.
-Bad luck. -No.
They turned on the "No Vacancy" sign when they saw us.
Well, I told you what to expect.
Please, we are desperate here, Officer.
Desperate? I heard you kids just inherited a whole house.
Well, you're not the first who couldn't stomach that place,
but best get back and tough it out
before some of the less friendly folks let the hounds out.
[indistinct speaking over radio]
Okay, I am so tired of this town and its asshole inhabitants.
Let's just... do what he said and go back to the Hell House.
-Do we have to? -Beats sleeping on the street.
Why don't you guys go back and try and get some sleep?
-While you do what? -I'm gonna get us some answers.
Grant, come on. We should stick together.
I'll be fine. Trust me.
[soft instrumental music]
I've been expecting you.
I don't want to go back in there.
Hey, you'll be fine. I promise.
-[cracking] -What was that?
It's Vickie's phone. It's smashed!
Explains why she hasn't been answering our calls.
She probably just dropped it or something.
And then stomped on it?
Vickie's crazy, but she's not that crazy.
Why are you so resistant to everything that's happening?
I'm not. I just wanna sleep, wake up and get out of here.
[footsteps receding]
It's not just me, right?
No. No, it's not just you.
[footsteps receding]
[sighs]
If Beth killed herself, it wasn't
because I broke her heart.
-At least, not entirely. -Then what was it?
That house! I mean, this town...
There is something... wrong here.
Something evil.
You see, you do feel things.
The answers you seek in the present lie in the past.
You need a crash course in the Gref family.
Oh, yeah? Well...
I'd say I've got a pretty good idea already.
So you do.
May I?
It all starts with Abigail Gref,
the hateful monster who built this house
a century ago as a place to practise her dark arts.
[Grant] Jesus.
-That's me and Beth. -No.
That's Dillon Faodhagain and Abigail Gref.
No. Screw this! This is...
This is just some cruel, fucked up joke
by my so-called friends, isn't it?
Helen's already been messing with the pictures and...
-No, this has got to be them. -It's not. I swear.
Now do you see why it's not safe to be here?
You're his latest incarnation.
Abigail Gref and Dillon Faodhagain are pawns
for the demonic underworld.
Vessels.
And their twisted fornication, it is told,
begat the one who denies the Father and the Son,
the Little Horn, the Beast of the Sea.
What the hell are you talking about?
They were murdered to protect the world.
But now, Dillon and Abigail have returned in the form
of you and Beth so that the Antichrist can be born--
The Antichrist?!
What are you talking about? That shit isn't real.
-And Beth is dead. -For now.
Nothing need be forever.
[tense instrumental music]
[footsteps approaching]
[Paige] Hey.
I know Simon wants to explain it all away, but...
Vickie's phone is a bad sign!
We should... we should call the police.
Do it if you want, but I have a feeling they're gonna tell us
to wait the 48 hours.
Hey, I'm with you about everything that's happening,
but the way Vickie lives her life, she could show up
happy, high and giving us the finger in 48 days.
[Helen chuckles]
Oh, I miss the city.
The glow, the noise, cell reception.
This place, it's...
pitch black.
Silent like... death.
[ominous instrumental music]
Part of me wishes we'd never come.
-Uh, I'm sorry. I-- -I'm sorry. No, it's fine.
-I get it. I get it. -[door shuts]
I think Grant's back.
Like I've been telling you, Aunt Stephanie,
she drives Beth to suicide, now she's trying to scare
the shit out of you, out of all of us,
hell, maybe she even put the bones in the closet
up in the attic, all so we return to the city
and never come back, and she inherits everything.
Or... maybe it's real. [sighs]
Some weird shit's been happening, and...
you can blame Aunt Stephanie and her weed all you want,
but even my goddamn camera's been acting up.
Jesus Christ.
And you are either way more scared than the rest of us
so you're searching for rational explanations,
or you're trying to fuck with us.
Seriously, Helen?
You think I'm doing all of this just to get sole custody
of some... some crappy house in a broke-ass town?
You were the one who jumped at the idea of selling it.
I don't know, maybe you need the money.
I've been being modest. I'm loaded.
-All right? -[Helen scoffs]
My share of this place would just be pocket change.
Okay, so to get back at us, then.
Guys! Guys, I'm so over this.
Now, I'm gonna go smoke this kickass weed,
conk out, and then get my ass out of town in the morning.
And then, I'm going to go join Vickie and press eject
on this fucked-up little paranoid friend group of ours.
And if you have any sense, you will do the same.
[footsteps receding]
[menacing instrumental music]
[house groaning]
-[clatter] -[house groaning]
[Helen breathing deeply]
-[door opens] -[floorboard creaks]
[Helen screams]
-[Simon laughs] -[Helen exhales heavily]
Payback is a bitch.
Simon, you fucking asshole! Get out!
[in deep voice] Call me the Great Goat Lord.
Heh! And after all the shit you accused me of earlier...
you deserved this. [chuckles]
[Helen] Fucking jerk.
[unsettling instrumental music]
[indistinct whispering]
[softly] You're losing your goddamn mind.
[sighs]
[rapid scuttling]
-[thud] -[rapid breathing]
[thud]
Simon, I will fuck you up!
[intriguing instrumental music]
[camera clicks]
-[gasps] -[rapid breathing]
[yelps]
[screams]
[squelching]
[erratic breathing]
[whoosh]
[eerie ambient music]
-[whoosh] -Hello, my love.
Hello.
-You're pregnant? -We are, Dillon.
I'm not Dillon.
[demonic voice] And I'm not Beth.
[gasps] [rapid breathing]
[grunts]
[exhales heavily]
[groans]
"Marry, fuck, kill."
[clicks]
Why did I come back here to the Gref House?
Why didn't I just run away
to Italy or Australia like I always wanted?
College was supposed to be an escape.
And now, thanks to Aunt Stephanie,
I've figured out the truth...
what's been hidden behind those doors
that my parents wouldn't talk about.
The truth about... me.
About Grant. About our fate.
Which, if you're watching this, means that...
I couldn't avoid it.
Grant.
I failed.
Now, it's up to you.
[intriguing instrumental music]
[Simon sighs]
Ah, fuck, Grant!
Oh, as if this house isn't creepy enough.
-Can you feel her too? -"Feel" who?
Beth.
Um... No.
No one can. Beth's dead.
Of course, you wouldn't feel her.
You two were never close.
-Vickie called it. -Called what?
The randomness of our connections.
In the grand scheme of things, you could've been really...
...anyone.
Dude, are you sleepwalking right now?
[eerie ambient music]
What the fuck?
[eerie ambient music]
[Grant] Beth.
You're alive.
Thank God.
[demonic voice] I'm not Beth.
[demonic voice] And I am not alive...
but that won't stop you and me.
[demonic voice] Nothing will.
[rising menacing music]
-[squelch] -[Simon groans]
-Grant? -No, no, no, no! Hey, hey, hey!
[Grant] PAIGE! PAIGE!
-Help! Help me! -Oh, my God! What happened?
[Grant] Shit! Come on, quick. Shit, shit, shit. Come on.
-Put him on the table! -Okay, come on. Come on, Simon.
Come on, buddy. Fuck! Fuck!
Grant, find a clean dish towel. Soak it under hot water.
We need to apply pressure and pack the wound. All right.
-[Simon gasping] -[Paige] Stay with us. Come on!
-Hey! Hey, Simon! -Fuck, dude! Here, here, here!
-Simon?! Simon! Come on! -Grant. Grant, step back.
-No. -Grant, he's gone.
-[Grant] SIMON! -Move back, Grant. Grant!
[tense instrumental music]
-[door opens] -[Stephanie] Is everything okay?
-[Paige] Who's there? -I heard screaming.
[Stephanie gasps]
[Stephanie] What... what happened?
I--I stabbed him... in--in the chest.
-It was an accident. -[Grant cries softly]
He's dead.
Are you sure? Maybe we should call 911--
I tried to stop the bleeding.
It was too late.
[Stephanie sighs] It's the family.
This cursed place.
It's never satisfied. It's never satiated.
-I warned you, all of you! -Enough!
Our friend is dead.
Helen. HELEN!
-HELEN! -Grant.
[ominous instrumental music]
Helen! Helen?
-Fuck is the light?! Helen! -It's here!
-[Grant] Oh, my God. -[footsteps approaching]
-Where is she? -I don't know. I don't know.
-Oh, my God! Oh! -Do you know?
Me? What do you mean?
It feels like you've been subtly manipulating things
since we got there.
-Am I crazy, Grant? -Nope.
That's the first thing I've heard that doesn't sound crazy.
You drugged us, put insane thoughts into Grant's head!
I have been warning you!
With shit that's feeding our paranoia!
Why would I do that?!
So you could get your hands on this house!
-Oh, my God! -Maybe you killed your niece.
-Beth killed herself. -How the fuck do we know that?
-'Cause you told us? -I'm going home.
-The police-- -No, no, no!
Are you the one that's been creeping around this house?
Was it you up in the attic, trying to freak us out?
-Get out of my way! -HEY!
-Hey! -Leave me alone!
HEY! You tell us right now what the fuck you did to our friends!
I had nothing to do with any of this.
Asmodeus? No...
-No! Oh! -[Grant] Shit!
She's... Oh.
[both breathing heavily]
[footsteps approaching]
Here. Something to settle both our nerves.
Thank you.
-[Grant] How did she fall? -[Paige] I don't know.
It was all so confusing.
What are we gonna do?
Grant.
No police, okay? Uh...
I have a record.
With Simon and my past...
can we just talk this out first?
-Yeah? -Okay.
That name she called out,
it was like she saw something... you think she did?
I think it was another one of her games.
-And this time, it didn't work. -So this was all Stephanie?
I can't believe I fell for that shit.
We all did, to some extent.
Because of her, I killed Simon.
She knew exactly what she was doing.
It just doesn't make any sense.
Why are you so calm? Hey.
-Did you fucking call them? -No, of course not.
Stephanie must have.
Oh...
[groans]
[sighs] Grant.
-[knocking] -You just lie there.
And I'll take care of everything.
[tense instrumental music]
-Evening. -Hello, Officer.
-Is there a problem? -Uh, yeah.
I had a call about a disturbance, some screaming.
Oh. Well, there's been some carrying on, but...
no, no screaming.
-[groans] -Who called you?
[sighs] Let me guess, Stephanie Gref?
Yeah... Well, if you want to be pressing charges
against anyone, it's her.
My friends have been smoking Aunt Stephanie's crazy weed.
Oh, jeez. Not the first time I've had that call.
-Uh-huh. -Where are your friends, anyway?
Oh, well, I actually sent them all to bed to sleep it off.
I don't imbibe myself, resident teetotaller,
which they love to remind me about.
I just want to make sure no one thinks they can fly
out of a window or, God forbid, choke on their own vomit.
[panting] [groans]
-Help. -Oh, Grant!
Grant, come over here. All right. I got you.
There we go. You really need to sleep this off.
Ever since they made this shit legal,
we've had to deal with calls like this.
And I've told Stephanie,
her weed is way too strong.
Oh, understatement of the year! I mean, look at him.
[Officer] I even had it tested once.
I thought that there has to be something else in it.
Yeah, well, as you can see, no screaming.
And I--I really should be getting this one to bed.
You're not gonna die, young man. You're gonna sleep it off.
And you're gonna have a hell of a story to tell in the morning.
Yeah. You hear that, Grant?
-Thank you. Thank you, Officer. -Yeah.
[lock clicks]
Well, we're lucky I didn't have to kill him.
[panting] You...
-Why? -Come on, Grant.
It's you and Beth.
All of this is.
Beth... Beth's dead.
Oh... Oh.
The veil between life and death is diaphanous.
It can be breached.
We will bring your love back.
-Together. -You...
-[thudding] -[groans]
Who are you?
Not who. What.
[demonic voice] Asmodeus. Your saviour.
[rising suspenseful music]
[Grant grunting]
[chain rattling]
[Grant grunting]
How are you doing over there, Grant?
Just wondering if you're gonna kill me next.
Of course not.
Then why am I chained up?!
Well, once you get the importance of your role
through that thick skull of yours, I'll free you.
But we have bigger issues to discuss first.
Like what?
Simple. Beth.
[Beth] Call me old-fashioned, Grant, I just...
I want to wait. Okay?
[Grant] Okay.
You wanted Beth.
I just wanted to make sure you got her.
[Paige] Her thoughts...
her eyes...
her pleasure...
on Grant.
Alone.
[sighs]
I found where Paige
hides her secret stash.
Her stash?
Since when does Paige have a...
-Yeah. -You know what?
I really don't care.
This is what you get for not sharing. Hah!
Oh, we are gonna have some fun tonight.
That wasn't pot.
So... it was some kind of love drug?
The others stole what I made for the two of you.
-[sighs] -And wound up in your bed.
[soft electronic music]
-That night ruined everything. -[Paige sighs]
It was a problem.
But one night can't undo your destiny.
Your family...
Faodhagain.
Beth's family... Gref.
Both tied to the dark arts,
both tied to each other.
And when Beth discovered your destinies...
...she summoned me.
-Paige, please-- -There is no Paige, Grant.
There never was.
Only Asmodeus.
[Grant shudders]
And I introduced you to her.
-You... -Yes.
Me.
And that game I got you all playing...
Marry, fuck, kill...
it is an old spell
suited to our purposes...
Bind, bed, bury.
What purposes? Beth's dead.
And you're talking about marriage,
about us being together?
Oh, it doesn't have to be wedlock.
It's binding,
connecting, attaching.
And as for Beth's death...
...we're going to bring her back.
What?
I convinced Beth to add you all to that will,
to bring you all here.
And so now, we are going to finish what Beth started.
[whoosh]
[Beth] Exorcizamus et, omnis spiritus,
om satanica potestas!
[Beth gasps and whimpers]
Paige?
[demonic voice] I prefer Asmodeus.
It's been you?
[demonic voice] Aiding... guiding you
to what must come to be.
Help me, Grant.
Help me bring Beth back to the mortal plane.
If you bind a piece
of all three of your carnal friends together,
out of their sacrifice,
the sweet Beth you knew
and loved will return.
-Stronger. -[Grant shudders]
Ready to assume her place by your side.
Their sacrifice? You fucking murdered them!
-I murdered them. -Oh, Grant.
Hey...
Given the chance, they would do the same to you.
Marry, fuck, kill.
-It's a stupid game. -They all chose you to murder.
Hmm?
There is brutal truth
to that game.
They mocked you behind your back, and you felt it.
You were great once. What are you now?
Hmm?
Wouldn't you rather thrive in power
with your fated love, Beth?
Instead of spending
the rest of your life wandering,
lost, like you have been,
for the next... 30, 40, 50 years?
A life...
fully inconsequential?
[rising tense music]
Yes, that's it.
[chains rattling]
What do I need to do?
[demonic voice] Cut my throat.
[rising suspenseful music]
[demonic voice] I humbly offer you my throat.
Bind, bed, bury.
What is thine will?
Love has all the power,
lust will devour,
and the heart shall never be still.
-[ominous instrumental music] -[singers chanting]
Deyan anay
tasa Asmodeus.
Deyan anay tasa Asmodeus!
DEYAN ANAY TASA ASMODEUS!
Now, Grant! Now!
-[Grant grunts] -[squelch]
[singers vocalizing]
[knife clatters]
[Grant breathes heavily]
Beth! Hey.
Oh... Oh, Beth.
Oh...
[ethereal music]
[water running]
[rhythmic instrumental music]
[singer vocalizing]
How are we going to explain any of this?
Our friends disappeared.
You're back from the dead.
You know what?
We blame it all on Stephanie.
Yeah.
She deserves it. [sighs]
And she's enough of a nut that everyone will believe it.
We're together now.
We're going to spend the rest of our lives together.
Rebuild this family... this town.
And rule it like the royalty I now know we are.
Our child will rule the world.
-I... -Shh. Shh.
But the most incredible thing...
...is how you risked your own life
just to bring us back together.
I've returned the favour.
I've conjured you.
And now, here you are.
-It wasn't a love spell, Grant. -Hmm.
Love... lust...
desire...
whatever it was,
it was for me.
It was for you...
but not for love.
Hate.
A hate spell
to end the evil of my family,
of your family... to end it all.
[tense instrumental music]
A hate spell?
But Asmodeus said she was the demon of love.
Lust and desire can also be hate.
A lust for blood.
A desire to destroy.
Bedfellows bound together forever.
Asmodeus oversees both.
[Beth sighs]
I don't understand. You hate me?
I hate what we've become.
It's evil...
what we're fated to be.
And the only way to avoid our fate was to destroy you.
Destroy us.
When Paige...
Asmodeus found out
what I was trying to do,
she fought back.
[demonic voice] Your fate you cannot avoid.
This world shall be destroyed.
The one who denies the Father and the Son
shall be born.
No!
Nothing you say will come to be.
My fate is mine and mine alone!
-NO! -[Beth grunts]
And now...
you've done Asmodeus's bidding
and brought me back to the mortal plane.
Now, I'm gonna set you free.
[Grant gasping]
[menacing music rising]
[inaudible]
[music fades]
[sighs heavily]
[unsettling instrumental music]
[gate creaks]
[gate clanging]
["Here in My Cube" by Luca & The Cube plays]
[upbeat instrumental music]
[singer vocalizing]
♪ I live in a box of my illusion ♪
♪ And rule the world from my seclusion ♪
♪ I hold the key but I don't go out ♪
♪ I go to sleep ♪
♪ Dream of the life for which I'm cut out ♪
[singer vocalizing]
♪ Here in my cube ♪
♪ Sailing through the stratosphere ♪
♪ Here in my cube ♪
♪ Waving in the atmosphere ♪
♪ Here in my cube ♪
♪ All my troubles disappear ♪
♪ Here in my cube ♪
♪ Now in this world of no intrusions ♪
♪ I'm free to draw my own conclusions ♪
♪ No need for gold imbued distractions ♪
♪ Till I pop a tear ♪
♪ I am the master of my actions ♪
[singer vocalizing]
♪ Here in my cube ♪
♪ Sailing through the stratosphere ♪
♪ Here in my cube ♪
[song ends]
-[whoosh] -[fire crackling]