1 00:00:27,152 --> 00:00:28,153 [Danny] Interesting. 2 00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,614 Hmm. 3 00:00:32,323 --> 00:00:36,954 Uh. [sighs] I'd have to say the chin. 4 00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:38,413 [Lisa] You could live without a chin? 5 00:00:38,413 --> 00:00:39,665 Oh, easily. 6 00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:42,918 But what would stop your teeth from falling out the bottom of your face? 7 00:00:42,918 --> 00:00:44,086 Trust me. I'd cope. 8 00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:46,630 Anyway, it'd be a much better life than you with your "no knees." 9 00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:48,924 Just two stiff legs. Ridiculous. 10 00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:51,593 For instance, how would you drive a forklift? 11 00:00:52,761 --> 00:00:54,012 That wouldn't concern me. 12 00:00:54,012 --> 00:00:56,056 Break-dance. You couldn't break-dance. 13 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:59,768 Again... [sighs] ...that is just not something that would affect my life. 14 00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:04,022 I could easily live without knees. Especially my knees. I hate 'em. 15 00:01:04,522 --> 00:01:05,899 There's nothing wrong with your knees. 16 00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:07,651 [Lisa] What do you mea--? They're massive. 17 00:01:07,651 --> 00:01:09,027 When I wear leggings, 18 00:01:09,027 --> 00:01:11,071 it looks like I'm smuggling a couple of cauliflowers. 19 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:13,949 Interesting. See, I'd lean more towards satsumas. 20 00:01:13,949 --> 00:01:14,992 Aw. Thanks. 21 00:01:14,992 --> 00:01:15,909 - [phone chimes] - [gasps] 22 00:01:15,909 --> 00:01:16,994 Oh. Veggie. 23 00:01:16,994 --> 00:01:18,787 Do I want anything from the airport? 24 00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:21,957 - A giant Toblerone. Obviously. - Obviously. 25 00:01:21,957 --> 00:01:23,876 Looking forward to Veg coming home. 26 00:01:23,876 --> 00:01:25,460 - Might cook him dinner. - What, you? 27 00:01:25,460 --> 00:01:28,005 Yes. [chuckles] Thank you, Daniel. I can cook. 28 00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:31,466 Anyway, tonight's the big night. 29 00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:32,718 What time's Amy arriving? 30 00:01:32,718 --> 00:01:34,052 [sighs] Just after 9:00. 31 00:01:34,052 --> 00:01:35,888 Uh, after she's finished with her last client. 32 00:01:35,888 --> 00:01:37,097 Oh, yeah. What's she do again? 33 00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:39,266 - Personal trainer. - Personal trainer. 34 00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,393 Oh, I went out with one of them. Do you know what? 35 00:01:41,393 --> 00:01:43,437 He used to stop foreplay to put his fitness watch on. 36 00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:45,105 It was a bit of a mood killer, if I'm honest. 37 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,398 Really? Oh, that reminds me. 38 00:01:46,398 --> 00:01:48,233 Uh, what's the password for the dating site again? 39 00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:50,152 I just wanna check my DMs to make sure I'm not, like, 40 00:01:50,152 --> 00:01:51,361 repeating myself with stories. 41 00:01:51,361 --> 00:01:52,779 [chuckles] Yeah. Potato123. 42 00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:54,406 Potato-- Potato123? 43 00:01:54,406 --> 00:01:55,574 Yeah. Potato123. 44 00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:58,785 - Potato123. Potato123. Potato123. - So, how did you, you know, 45 00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,747 tell her about the whole not-being-able-to-go-out thing? 46 00:02:01,747 --> 00:02:04,833 Oh, yeah. Yeah. You'll like this. Um... 47 00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:06,335 - Mmm? - I didn't. 48 00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:08,086 Oh, Danny, just tell her. She'll understand. 49 00:02:08,086 --> 00:02:09,253 It's a first date. 50 00:02:09,253 --> 00:02:11,590 I'll tell her when things get more serious. 51 00:02:11,590 --> 00:02:13,258 Like when we're in a care home together. 52 00:02:13,258 --> 00:02:16,303 [chuckles] All right. Fine. So what are you gonna cook? 53 00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:17,971 Well... 54 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,891 - Where do you want it, Daniel? - On the counter. Cheers, Adam. 55 00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,017 Is Adam cooking? 56 00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:23,685 No, he just picked up a few things. 57 00:02:24,228 --> 00:02:25,312 Ah! Take me with you. 58 00:02:27,231 --> 00:02:28,065 [sighs] 59 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:30,651 - Hi, Adam. - [Adam] Oh, hi, Leese. 60 00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:31,818 How's the firefighting? 61 00:02:31,818 --> 00:02:35,614 Yeah, good. Well, not good. No fire is good. 62 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:37,157 It's, like, our main rule. 63 00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,534 Ah. 64 00:02:38,534 --> 00:02:40,869 [inhales deeply] Okay. So, let me talk you through these. 65 00:02:40,869 --> 00:02:43,497 I went foraging this morning, so it's as fresh as can be. 66 00:02:43,497 --> 00:02:45,541 - Danny, did he just say foraging? - I think so, yeah. 67 00:02:45,541 --> 00:02:48,460 So in here, you've got your nettles. This is the best time of year for them. 68 00:02:48,460 --> 00:02:50,546 I'm surprised there's ever a good time to eat nettles. 69 00:02:50,546 --> 00:02:53,298 Then you've got your wild garlic and your chestnuts. 70 00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:54,383 Any questions? 71 00:02:54,383 --> 00:02:56,844 - I don't know where to begin. Um-- - Okay, so, for me, 72 00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:59,263 I like to fry it all up with oil and then have it with some wild rice. 73 00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:00,722 - Mmm. - Have you got any wild rice? 74 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:02,599 - Do I have any wild rice? - No. You don't have wild rice. 75 00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:05,853 Don't worry. I got you. I'll be back in a sec. Don't go anywhere. 76 00:03:06,478 --> 00:03:08,146 Danny, don't you think Adam does enough for you? 77 00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:10,816 He does your washing, shopping and now you've got him in the woods foraging. 78 00:03:10,816 --> 00:03:13,151 He likes to lend a helping hand. I'm not gonna stop him. 79 00:03:13,151 --> 00:03:14,778 - I think you're taking advantage. - [stammers] 80 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:16,697 Here we go. Wild rice. 81 00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,657 Brilliant. Thank you. Right, Adam. Listen up. 82 00:03:18,657 --> 00:03:19,908 We were just talking. 83 00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:22,160 If you had to live without a body part, what would it be? 84 00:03:27,165 --> 00:03:28,125 Adam? 85 00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:30,502 Adam? 86 00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:31,545 [Danny] Adam? 87 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:32,838 - Adam? - Adam? 88 00:03:32,838 --> 00:03:34,256 I don't know what I could, 89 00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:36,675 but I definitely couldn't live without my nose. 90 00:03:36,675 --> 00:03:38,218 - Why not? - I'd just miss it. 91 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:40,512 - Hmm. - Did I ever tell you about that time 92 00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:42,598 my uncle Brian worked in construction in the '90s? 93 00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,601 [Adam] So there he was with his mate Trevor, working away 94 00:03:45,601 --> 00:03:48,770 when this six-foot sheet of metal above them comes loose, 95 00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:51,190 falls down, misses my uncle, but whoosh-- 96 00:03:51,190 --> 00:03:52,608 - [shouts] - [Adam] Catches his mate Trevor. 97 00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:54,234 - Slices the end of his nose off. - [grunting] 98 00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:56,862 Somehow my uncle found the tip. 99 00:03:56,862 --> 00:03:58,488 And without a moment's thought... 100 00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:00,365 - No! Don't eat it! - ...he popped it in his mouth. 101 00:04:00,365 --> 00:04:02,367 He put it in his mouth? 102 00:04:02,367 --> 00:04:04,161 - Well, you would, wouldn't you? - No, you wouldn't. 103 00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:05,662 - No. Why would you do that? - No. You wouldn't. 104 00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:07,372 The mouth is the best place to keep it fresh. 105 00:04:07,372 --> 00:04:09,291 No. I'm sorry. That just can't be true. 106 00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:12,044 So wait. Your uncle sucked on his mate's nose? 107 00:04:12,044 --> 00:04:15,339 That's just not hygienic. So what happened? 108 00:04:15,339 --> 00:04:17,173 Well, they took Trevor and the tip to the surgeon 109 00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:18,341 and got it stitched back on. 110 00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:20,219 Now my uncle's godfather to Trev's daughter. 111 00:04:20,219 --> 00:04:23,138 And as for his nose, from some angles, you would never know. 112 00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:26,266 But from others, it did look a bit like a badly-split sausage. 113 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:28,310 Right. Well, I'd better shoot. 114 00:04:28,310 --> 00:04:31,480 Gotta pop upstairs and help Mr. Shamim into his bath. 115 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:33,565 Any problems, I'm just across the hall, all right? 116 00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:35,442 - Cheers, Adam. Appreciate it. - Bye, Leese! 117 00:04:35,442 --> 00:04:36,902 [Lisa] Bye. 118 00:04:36,902 --> 00:04:40,572 That guy's just too nice for his own good. I can't believe he's still single. 119 00:04:40,572 --> 00:04:42,282 You know, you never say that about me. 120 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,825 But, Danny, I find it hard to comprehend 121 00:04:43,825 --> 00:04:45,911 - that anyone ever went out with you. - Yeah. Fair. 122 00:04:45,911 --> 00:04:47,037 [chuckles] I am joking. 123 00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:49,206 She better be good enough for you, this Amy. 124 00:04:49,206 --> 00:04:50,874 And she better not tease you about how weird you are. 125 00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:52,209 What, like you just did there? 126 00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:54,753 Well, yeah. But that's different. 'Cause I'm allowed. 127 00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:57,464 Yeah. All right. I'm a bit terrified, if I'm honest. 128 00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,882 You know, the whole talking, 129 00:04:58,882 --> 00:05:00,884 texting to her from, you know, a distance of at least, 130 00:05:00,884 --> 00:05:03,011 like, 14 square miles, that's terrifying enough. 131 00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:06,890 But, uh, to have her here in the flat, yards away from my underwear drawer. 132 00:05:06,890 --> 00:05:09,101 You know, expecting me to talk, say interesting things. 133 00:05:09,101 --> 00:05:11,562 It's-- It's horrifying. Like I don't know how people do this, you know? 134 00:05:11,562 --> 00:05:13,021 I don't have any stories to tell as well. 135 00:05:13,021 --> 00:05:15,440 Because I've been inside all the time. So I have no anecdotes. 136 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,943 I know I've put too much aftershave on 'cause it's starting to redden and... 137 00:05:17,943 --> 00:05:19,903 [inhales deeply] ...it's starting to burn the nostrils. 138 00:05:19,903 --> 00:05:23,031 Serious now, what are the chances that Amy's gonna be up for some nettles? 139 00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:25,284 What, you mean nettles that a dog has almost certainly pissed on? 140 00:05:25,284 --> 00:05:27,119 This is gonna be the worst date in history. 141 00:05:27,119 --> 00:05:28,871 No, it's not. It's gonna be great. 142 00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:32,082 Plus, I have already been on the worst date in history. 143 00:05:32,082 --> 00:05:34,751 Tell me about it. 'Cause if it's good, I'm gonna package it as my own story. 144 00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:37,129 Well, he chose the place. 145 00:05:37,129 --> 00:05:39,506 We had a couple of beers. We had some good chat. 146 00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:42,009 And then he suggested we move to a different setting. I said... 147 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:42,926 Yeah. Sure. 148 00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:46,096 And that's when I realized our table wasn't just a table. 149 00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:47,306 What's going on? 150 00:05:47,806 --> 00:05:49,474 [Lisa] It was also a bike. 151 00:05:50,142 --> 00:05:52,144 - Seven miles he made me cycle. - [pants] 152 00:05:52,144 --> 00:05:53,562 - And for a week after... - [grunting] 153 00:05:53,562 --> 00:05:56,190 ...I walked around like a cowboy lost in a car park. 154 00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:00,444 - Yeah. No, that's-- that's pretty bad. - Mm-hmm. 155 00:06:00,444 --> 00:06:02,696 Uh, listen. I've been worrying about this all week. 156 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:04,698 - Mmm. - I've come up with a few ideas 157 00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:06,909 that might help her feel more at ease. 158 00:06:06,909 --> 00:06:08,619 Course you have. Go on then. Let's hear 'em. 159 00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:09,578 Okay. First one. 160 00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:11,538 Do I remove all doors on my cupboards 161 00:06:11,538 --> 00:06:13,290 so that she knows I'm not concealing any weapons 162 00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:14,416 or recording devices? 163 00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,959 - No. - Okay. What about this one? 164 00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:18,504 Should I put on two pairs of trousers? 165 00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:20,547 You know what? 166 00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:22,382 Why don't you just put a padlock on your flies? 167 00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,926 I think that'll really put her at ease. 168 00:06:25,052 --> 00:06:26,470 Well, 'cause it-- What do you mean? Really? 169 00:06:26,470 --> 00:06:28,055 No! A man with no cupboard doors 170 00:06:28,055 --> 00:06:30,224 and wearing two pairs of trousers would terrify me. 171 00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:31,725 You know what you're trying to do? 172 00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:33,227 - What? - You're trying to sabotage yourself. 173 00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:34,144 I know what you're like. 174 00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,521 You've got this self-destructive thing 175 00:06:35,521 --> 00:06:37,940 where you think you should be unhappy and live alone for the rest of your life. 176 00:06:37,940 --> 00:06:39,358 That does not sound like me. 177 00:06:39,358 --> 00:06:41,068 I am a one-man roller coaster of happiness. 178 00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:44,404 Well, one-man roller coaster of happiness, for one night only then, 179 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:46,114 why don't you try and enjoy yourself? 180 00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:48,909 I hate trying to enjoy myself. It hurts my tummy. 181 00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,410 - [buzzer sounds] - [grunts] 182 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,496 - That's her. - Yep. I know it's her. I can hear. 183 00:06:52,496 --> 00:06:54,289 - Okay. - Um... [stammers] Just relax. 184 00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:56,625 - And, uh-- That's too much. [sighs] - Okay. Okay. 185 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,252 No, leave them. They were nice. 186 00:06:58,252 --> 00:07:01,380 Um... I'm okay. Um... Sh-- 187 00:07:01,380 --> 00:07:02,297 - Calm down. - I am calm. 188 00:07:02,297 --> 00:07:04,132 Don't say "calm down" 'cause then I won't be calm. 189 00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:05,592 Don't panic. [muttering] 190 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:06,927 You're good. You've got this. 191 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:10,013 [whispers indistinctly] 192 00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:12,558 - Hey. - [Amy] Hi. 193 00:07:12,558 --> 00:07:13,725 Don't do that voice. 194 00:07:13,725 --> 00:07:14,935 I know. Shut up. 195 00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:17,187 Hang on. Um, yeah. 196 00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:20,691 - Two seconds. - Oh. Okay. 197 00:07:20,691 --> 00:07:21,775 [Lisa] Better. 198 00:07:23,527 --> 00:07:25,112 [pants] It's her. She's here now. 199 00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:27,447 - So, um-- I'm going to, uh-- Yeah. - Yeah, she's here. 200 00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:28,740 - I'll keep you informed. - Okay. 201 00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:29,783 You're good. You've got this. 202 00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:31,910 Just be normal, okay? 203 00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:33,245 [stammers] Don't say that. 204 00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:35,873 [sighs] 205 00:07:39,001 --> 00:07:41,712 [sighs] 206 00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:46,133 Oh. 207 00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:49,845 Excuse me, sir. Sir? [gasps] 208 00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:53,015 - [groans] - [groans] 209 00:07:53,682 --> 00:07:55,517 [Danny breathing heavily] Do it. 210 00:07:56,727 --> 00:07:57,561 Amy. [sighs] 211 00:07:57,561 --> 00:07:58,562 Danny. 212 00:07:58,562 --> 00:07:59,646 - Hi. - Hey. 213 00:08:00,272 --> 00:08:02,482 - Sorry. Oh. Is it a kind of-- - Hands. [stammers] 214 00:08:03,567 --> 00:08:04,693 Double. Isn't that better? 215 00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:05,861 - Who's she? - [chuckles, sighs] 216 00:08:05,861 --> 00:08:07,237 I thought I knew all your friends. 217 00:08:07,237 --> 00:08:09,531 Please, come in. Quickly. Sorry. Just ignore him. 218 00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:11,742 [stammers] I know it's tough, but trust me, it's for the best. 219 00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:15,454 Or would you prefer that open? 220 00:08:15,454 --> 00:08:17,789 [inhales sharply, stammers] Why would I prefer that? 221 00:08:17,789 --> 00:08:19,499 I don't know. If you wanted to, you know-- 222 00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,919 You know-- [blows] In case you felt-- If you-- 223 00:08:21,919 --> 00:08:22,836 If what? 224 00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:25,380 If you're in fear of your life. Speaking of which-- 225 00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:27,674 [groans] 226 00:08:28,634 --> 00:08:29,635 Adam. 227 00:08:29,635 --> 00:08:31,637 - Yep? - This is Adam. 228 00:08:31,637 --> 00:08:33,096 - He's a-- He's a firefighter. - Hi. 229 00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,222 Very tall, very muscular. 230 00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:35,682 He can overpower me in an instant, 231 00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,142 so that's the place to run 232 00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:38,769 - if you-- any whiff of trouble, okay? - Danny? 233 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:40,395 - Yeah? - What are you doing? 234 00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:42,231 Just trying to make you feel at ease. 235 00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:46,193 Danny. [stammers] Calm down. Get me a drink, for God's sake. 236 00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:48,320 Is it-- [chuckles] Oh. All right. 237 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,240 [chuckles] I mean, trust me, if you did try anything dodgy, 238 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,116 I could kick your arse in an instant. 239 00:08:53,825 --> 00:08:56,119 Okay. Excellent. Good to-- Yeah. Good to-- Good to know. 240 00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:58,038 So do you just want me to wait here or-- 241 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:06,088 ...ma'am I stabbed him in the neck. Like you said. I told you that. 242 00:09:06,088 --> 00:09:09,967 But what you didn't tell us is that you also strangled him earlier. 243 00:09:09,967 --> 00:09:11,969 You actually killed him twice. 244 00:09:11,969 --> 00:09:13,804 - Mmm. - [actor] Well, now, ma'am... 245 00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:18,892 - [game gunfire] - [characters groaning] 246 00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:22,229 - [phone ringing] - [sighs] 247 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:24,648 - Oh, cover me. - Okay. 248 00:09:25,148 --> 00:09:26,650 Hey, Leese. Everything okay? 249 00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:29,236 Hey. Yeah. Just checking you landed okay. 250 00:09:29,236 --> 00:09:31,280 - Oh, we haven't even taken off. - What? 251 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:32,656 No. Flight got delayed. 252 00:09:32,656 --> 00:09:34,658 Yeah, pilot's lost his hat or something. I don't know. 253 00:09:34,658 --> 00:09:35,742 Aw. [whimpers] 254 00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:37,077 - Oh, 3:00! - What? 255 00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:38,954 Oh! Get him right in the face! 256 00:09:39,663 --> 00:09:40,497 What are you doing? 257 00:09:40,497 --> 00:09:42,749 Oh, sorry. Uh, me and Rob are playing Dead Zone Seven. 258 00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:44,334 You know, just to kill the time. 259 00:09:44,334 --> 00:09:46,670 - And zombies. - Yes, and zombies, to be fair. 260 00:09:46,670 --> 00:09:47,754 Uh, so, what's up? 261 00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,464 No. Nothing. Just looking forward to seeing you. 262 00:09:49,464 --> 00:09:50,591 - Yeah? - Oh, sorry. 263 00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:52,217 Did I say you? I meant my Toblerone. 264 00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:53,594 - Oh. Charming. - [chuckles] 265 00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:55,888 If we get delayed any longer, you'll be lucky if it makes it home. 266 00:09:55,888 --> 00:09:57,389 - [gasps] No. - Yeah. Honestly, Lisa, 267 00:09:57,389 --> 00:09:59,808 - I've never been so hungry in all my life. - Don't you dare, Veggie. 268 00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:02,227 That Toblerone... [chuckles] ...is the only thing that's keeping me going. 269 00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:04,062 I am dangerously bored right now. 270 00:10:04,062 --> 00:10:05,564 - Nine o'clock! - Oh. 271 00:10:05,564 --> 00:10:07,691 Okay. And I'm boring you with how bored I am. 272 00:10:07,691 --> 00:10:10,277 Oh, well, um, you know, why don't you give Danny a call? 273 00:10:10,277 --> 00:10:11,320 You know, you usually do. 274 00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:14,198 [stammers] Well, yeah. I mean, only 'cause he's up when I'm up. 275 00:10:14,198 --> 00:10:17,034 But-- No, he's actually, um-- He's on a date tonight. 276 00:10:17,034 --> 00:10:19,453 Oh, right. Oh. Good for him. It's about time. 277 00:10:19,453 --> 00:10:24,041 That's what I thought. It is good for him. So, um-- So, yeah. 278 00:10:24,041 --> 00:10:25,667 Everything's all good basically. 279 00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:27,711 Oh. Hang on, Leese. They've breached the barricades. 280 00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:29,379 - I'll text you when I land, okay? - Okay. 281 00:10:32,424 --> 00:10:33,884 Sorry. We'll just be a few minutes. 282 00:10:33,884 --> 00:10:35,219 ["The Little White Door" playing on radio] 283 00:10:42,726 --> 00:10:44,895 ["Stars Away from Heaven" playing on radio] 284 00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:46,647 - [cell phone ringing] - Mmm. 285 00:10:48,732 --> 00:10:49,733 Hello. You okay? 286 00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:51,944 [whispering] Amazing. 287 00:10:52,653 --> 00:10:54,112 - What is? - She is. 288 00:10:54,112 --> 00:10:56,240 Oh. That's good. 289 00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,408 Yeah. There I was, totally worried about everything, right? 290 00:10:58,408 --> 00:11:00,118 She walks in, sees me acting like a twat, says, 291 00:11:00,118 --> 00:11:01,036 "Bollocks to this." 292 00:11:01,036 --> 00:11:03,497 Takes one look at the dog piss nettles and says, 293 00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:05,499 "Well, let's just order in Chinese instead." 294 00:11:05,499 --> 00:11:08,085 Honestly, I think she's the funniest person I've ever met. 295 00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:09,753 Well, that's great. 296 00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:12,881 Yeah. And also, she just-- She's so easy to talk to. 297 00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:15,050 That's so great. That's really-- 298 00:11:15,050 --> 00:11:16,552 - That's amazing. - Yeah. 299 00:11:16,552 --> 00:11:18,887 So, like, when you're talk-- When the-- With the f-- Um-- 300 00:11:18,887 --> 00:11:21,139 Like, with the funny thing, like, why's she so funny? 301 00:11:21,139 --> 00:11:23,684 Like, what's her-- Give me some examples. 302 00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:24,977 Like, what's her style? Like-- 303 00:11:24,977 --> 00:11:26,395 Yeah. There was this bit where she-- 304 00:11:26,395 --> 00:11:27,855 Honestly, I could not stop-- 305 00:11:27,855 --> 00:11:29,356 You know when you're not supposed to laugh? 306 00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,899 Like when you're in school and you'd get told off. 307 00:11:30,899 --> 00:11:33,402 I just could not stop laughing and kept going and going and going. 308 00:11:33,402 --> 00:11:34,945 I was cracking up. There was a bit-- 309 00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:37,197 What was it? She was like-- She was just kind of-- 310 00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:39,700 I don't know if it's gonna make any sense. That's the thing. 311 00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:41,201 It's one of those things where you had to be there. 312 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:42,661 That sort of thing. Anyway, I'd better go. 313 00:11:42,661 --> 00:11:44,162 She's probably wondering why I'm taking so long. 314 00:11:44,162 --> 00:11:45,330 I'll speak to you later. Ciao. 315 00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:47,958 Okay. [inhales deeply] 316 00:11:55,007 --> 00:11:57,593 ["Homage" playing] 317 00:12:03,098 --> 00:12:04,099 [whispering] Poppy? 318 00:12:07,686 --> 00:12:08,687 Ice cream. 319 00:12:10,522 --> 00:12:11,440 [cork pops] 320 00:12:43,972 --> 00:12:45,390 "Toes"? 321 00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:52,105 - [Amy laughs] - [Danny] You're joking. 322 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:55,067 I'm bloody not. You think your cat fella is bad? 323 00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:57,110 My neighbor, literally without fail, 324 00:12:57,110 --> 00:13:02,366 sings through my letter box every night at precisely 1:00 a.m. 325 00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:03,909 He sounds nuts. 326 00:13:03,909 --> 00:13:05,494 Yeah. Nice voice though. 327 00:13:05,494 --> 00:13:06,662 There we go. 328 00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,413 - Lisa, she, um... - [phone ringing] 329 00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:09,998 ...she has this neighbor that, uh-- 330 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:12,668 Oh. Hold on. Sorry. 331 00:13:13,252 --> 00:13:14,586 Oh. Talk of the devil. 332 00:13:16,171 --> 00:13:17,214 Sorry. I'll just-- 333 00:13:17,214 --> 00:13:19,132 - Must be something important. Sorry. - Yes. It's okay. 334 00:13:24,012 --> 00:13:25,430 [ringing continues] 335 00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:28,642 [whispering] Hi. 336 00:13:28,642 --> 00:13:31,144 Hey. Uh, sorry, I just wanted to let you know, 337 00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:34,648 I've sent you a reset link for the password for the dating site. 338 00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:36,692 'Cause I was just thinking, if my account gets hacked, 339 00:13:36,692 --> 00:13:39,194 then your messages will get hacked too. And that'd be really bad. 340 00:13:40,404 --> 00:13:42,322 Right. Okay. Well, yeah, thank you. 341 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:45,909 Yeah. So, is Amy still there? 342 00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:47,870 Yeah. Yeah, she's still here. 343 00:13:47,870 --> 00:13:50,455 That's great. I mean, she obviously really likes you. 344 00:13:50,455 --> 00:13:51,456 I mean, if she didn't, 345 00:13:51,456 --> 00:13:53,709 she definitely would have sent a text to a friend, getting them to call, 346 00:13:53,709 --> 00:13:56,461 saying there was an emergency and she had to leave immediately. So... 347 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:58,755 Right. Okay. Well, yeah. [stammers] No one's called. 348 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:02,134 Yeah. 'Cause, I mean, usually, that's within the first 15 minutes. 349 00:14:02,134 --> 00:14:03,594 So... [chuckles] ...if someone calls now, 350 00:14:03,594 --> 00:14:05,637 then it probably is a real emergency. [chuckles] 351 00:14:05,637 --> 00:14:07,639 Right. Well, thanks for letting me know. 352 00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:13,103 Okay. Um-- Yeah, all right. Well, uh, I'll let you go. 353 00:14:13,103 --> 00:14:16,231 Uh, good luck. Have fun. [chuckles] 354 00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:17,482 Yeah. Bye. 355 00:14:21,987 --> 00:14:25,115 - Hi, and welcome to Rapid Recipes. - Hi. 356 00:14:25,115 --> 00:14:27,784 Now, this recipe is one of my all-time favorites. 357 00:14:27,784 --> 00:14:30,621 An absolute banger and guaranteed to impress. 358 00:14:30,621 --> 00:14:31,622 Are we ready? 359 00:14:31,622 --> 00:14:32,748 - Ready. - Before we start, 360 00:14:32,748 --> 00:14:35,042 remember to hit that like and subscribe button 361 00:14:35,042 --> 00:14:36,668 so that when our latest video drops, you'll r-- 362 00:14:36,668 --> 00:14:37,961 - [sighs] - Okay, are we ready? 363 00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:39,004 Still ready. 364 00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:40,839 So, I came up with this recipe 365 00:14:40,839 --> 00:14:43,258 whilst walking through the canola flower fields of Gansu, 366 00:14:43,258 --> 00:14:45,385 - which-- I'm not gonna lie-- - Just tell me how to make it. 367 00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:48,347 This method of cooking actually hails from the Sichuan province. 368 00:14:48,347 --> 00:14:51,058 Traveling the country by rail is a great way of seeing China 369 00:14:51,058 --> 00:14:52,100 - and all it has to offer. - [sighs] 370 00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:54,978 I'll never forget the last words my grandmother said to me before she died. 371 00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:55,979 Oh, my God. Nobody cares. 372 00:14:55,979 --> 00:14:58,315 Okay, so let's get down to some cooking. 373 00:14:58,315 --> 00:14:59,233 Finally. 374 00:14:59,233 --> 00:15:01,151 [advertisement] Travel to China in five-star-- 375 00:15:01,151 --> 00:15:02,236 Ah. No. 376 00:15:02,778 --> 00:15:04,404 - [door closes] - [Veggie] Hey. 377 00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:06,615 Oh, hi. How was Aberdeen? 378 00:15:06,615 --> 00:15:09,076 Uh, only really saw the hotel conference suite. 379 00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:10,327 It was nice though. 380 00:15:11,453 --> 00:15:13,622 - I come with chocolate. - Aw. Thank you. 381 00:15:13,622 --> 00:15:15,541 - [kisses] Hmm. - Hmm. 382 00:15:15,541 --> 00:15:16,583 Hmm. Hungry? 383 00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:18,377 Starving. I was just gonna grab a Huel. 384 00:15:18,377 --> 00:15:20,379 Oh. Well, actually, I thought I might cook. 385 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:23,465 God, are you-- are you feeling okay? [chuckles] 386 00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:24,424 [chuckles] Don't be mean. 387 00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,468 - [Danny laughing] - [Amy] Oh, he's always doing that. 388 00:15:26,468 --> 00:15:27,970 [both laughing] 389 00:15:31,849 --> 00:15:33,892 So, any scandal? 390 00:15:34,518 --> 00:15:37,479 You know, "What happens in Aberdeen, stays in Aberdeen"? 391 00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:40,899 Uh, not really. Just, you know, insurance stuff mainly. 392 00:15:40,899 --> 00:15:42,943 Really? God, that's boring. 393 00:15:42,943 --> 00:15:45,487 I thought conferences were all about people getting drunk 394 00:15:45,487 --> 00:15:47,781 and having orgies in hotel rooms. 395 00:15:47,781 --> 00:15:51,201 - You've met the people I work with. - Come on. There must be some gossip. 396 00:15:51,201 --> 00:15:55,873 Who was that one at the Christmas party who kept stroking your arm all night? 397 00:15:55,873 --> 00:15:56,957 - Paula. - Ah. 398 00:15:56,957 --> 00:15:59,585 She definitely has a dungeon in her house. 399 00:15:59,585 --> 00:16:01,753 - [chuckles] No. - Yeah. 400 00:16:01,753 --> 00:16:03,797 Although she did just have her basement converted. 401 00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:05,382 - See? - Mmm. 402 00:16:05,382 --> 00:16:06,341 - Actually... - [grunts] 403 00:16:06,341 --> 00:16:08,010 ...I saw this program the other day, 404 00:16:08,010 --> 00:16:11,638 and there was this couple, right, who were having their basement done up. 405 00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,056 [yelps] What did you do? 406 00:16:13,056 --> 00:16:15,267 - Oh. [stammering] - Veg. 407 00:16:15,851 --> 00:16:16,852 [coughs] 408 00:16:18,687 --> 00:16:20,480 - Mmm. - [chews] So good. 409 00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:21,398 So good. 410 00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:24,067 Looks great. 411 00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:26,403 Yeah, I managed to scrape most of the burnt bits off. 412 00:16:26,904 --> 00:16:28,947 So, bon appétit. [sighs] 413 00:16:29,907 --> 00:16:31,241 [chuckling] 414 00:16:32,117 --> 00:16:33,785 - Who's that? - [chuckles] Oh, it's just, uh, 415 00:16:33,785 --> 00:16:35,954 Steve from the Milton Keynes office. 416 00:16:35,954 --> 00:16:37,039 - [chuckles] - Hmm? 417 00:16:37,915 --> 00:16:38,749 Well, share the joke. 418 00:16:39,333 --> 00:16:40,584 Oh, ri-- Oh. Sorry, yeah. 419 00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:42,920 Um, last night, the whole team, we went out for dinner. 420 00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:45,005 And we were starving, so we ended up at Five Guys. 421 00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:48,342 Five Guys? Wow, you never go to Five Guys with me. 422 00:16:48,926 --> 00:16:50,969 - Right, yeah. Sorry. Um, we were there-- - Sorry, sorry. 423 00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:52,471 - Yeah. Go on. - Yeah, and, uh-- 424 00:16:52,471 --> 00:16:54,890 [chuckles] They've got this, uh, drinks machine, you know, 425 00:16:54,890 --> 00:16:56,683 where you can pick whatever you want. 426 00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:59,520 - Mmm, yeah. Okay. [chuckles] - So... [chuckling] ...Steve-- 427 00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:02,022 - Steve goes up to it... - Okay. 428 00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:03,190 ...and he mixes together-- 429 00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:04,691 Oh, God, no. What? [chuckling] 430 00:17:04,691 --> 00:17:09,988 Coke, Coke Zero and Diet Coke. Like-- Like a third of each. 431 00:17:10,948 --> 00:17:11,949 - He didn't. - [chuckles] 432 00:17:11,949 --> 00:17:13,157 Oh, it gets better. 433 00:17:13,157 --> 00:17:14,367 - Okay. - [stammers] So then, 434 00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:16,369 he goes over to the guy that works there, 435 00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:19,665 who's looking at him like he is insane. 436 00:17:19,665 --> 00:17:21,625 - I bet he was. [chuckles] - [chuckles] And, uh, 437 00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:25,127 Steve says-- [laughs] 438 00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:26,338 Steve says, 439 00:17:27,172 --> 00:17:30,259 "I'm sorry, I've got a Coke problem." 440 00:17:30,259 --> 00:17:32,177 [laughing] 441 00:17:34,596 --> 00:17:35,514 [chuckles] No way. 442 00:17:35,514 --> 00:17:37,057 - [chuckles] Oh, man. - [chuckles] 443 00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:39,768 I thought they were gonna, like, throw us out or something. [laughs] 444 00:17:39,768 --> 00:17:44,064 Yeah, I bet you did. [chuckling] God, that is just so Steve, isn't it? 445 00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:45,732 Uh-- Oh. [stammers] Have you met him before? 446 00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:47,901 No. But, you know, I feel like I have now. [mumbles] 447 00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:49,361 Oh, yeah. Ah, man. 448 00:17:49,361 --> 00:17:53,115 - The guy is such a joker. [laughing] - [chuckles] 449 00:17:56,285 --> 00:17:58,412 [sighs] Kills me. 450 00:17:59,162 --> 00:18:00,372 You know what we should do? 451 00:18:00,372 --> 00:18:01,874 I've got some cards. 452 00:18:01,874 --> 00:18:04,835 They're called Spicy Talk. 453 00:18:04,835 --> 00:18:06,628 {\an8}- Spicy Talk? - [Danny] That's right. 454 00:18:06,628 --> 00:18:09,131 They're like a "where'd you lose your virginity" sort of thing. 455 00:18:09,131 --> 00:18:10,465 - [chuckles] - They're a gift from Lisa. 456 00:18:10,465 --> 00:18:11,717 Could be fun? 457 00:18:11,717 --> 00:18:12,676 - Yeah, I'm game. - Yeah? 458 00:18:12,676 --> 00:18:13,760 Sure. 459 00:18:14,428 --> 00:18:15,554 Question one. 460 00:18:15,554 --> 00:18:18,223 "Where is the wildest place you have ever had sex?" 461 00:18:18,223 --> 00:18:19,892 - My mum and dad's bed. - Oh. 462 00:18:19,892 --> 00:18:21,185 A mini submarine. 463 00:18:21,185 --> 00:18:22,519 Basildon. 464 00:18:22,519 --> 00:18:23,729 Trust me. It's crazy. 465 00:18:24,479 --> 00:18:26,773 "Tell me the story of your first love." 466 00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:27,733 Serena Williams. 467 00:18:27,733 --> 00:18:30,444 I had this recurring dream about her challenging me 468 00:18:30,444 --> 00:18:33,697 to an arm wrestle. [sighs] She beat me every time. 469 00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,282 That one's quite specific, isn't it? 470 00:18:35,282 --> 00:18:37,201 - Wonder Woman. Figurine. - Mmm. 471 00:18:37,201 --> 00:18:38,327 Mmm. 472 00:18:38,327 --> 00:18:40,913 Yeah, I sandpapered her uniform off. 473 00:18:40,913 --> 00:18:41,914 - Oh. - To see her naked. 474 00:18:41,914 --> 00:18:43,999 - [gasps] - You know, things didn't work out... 475 00:18:43,999 --> 00:18:45,501 {\an8}- [laughs] - ... for obvious reasons. 476 00:18:46,043 --> 00:18:47,336 "What do you think is your best quality?" 477 00:18:47,336 --> 00:18:48,587 My lung capacity. 478 00:18:48,587 --> 00:18:50,589 {\an8}Yeah, I can hold my breath for four and a half minutes. 479 00:18:51,507 --> 00:18:56,386 Looking on the bright side of life. Plus, a great arse. 480 00:18:56,386 --> 00:18:58,514 - Humble. - [laughs] What about you? 481 00:18:58,514 --> 00:19:00,390 I'd say probably that, um, I'm quiet. 482 00:19:00,390 --> 00:19:02,392 - Mm-hmm. - My jizz. 483 00:19:02,392 --> 00:19:04,061 And I like to tidy up after myself. 484 00:19:04,061 --> 00:19:05,312 - So sexy. - Isn't it? 485 00:19:05,312 --> 00:19:06,855 - Yeah. - Then rounding off the full package, 486 00:19:06,855 --> 00:19:08,941 - I like to stay out of the way. - [laughs] 487 00:19:09,691 --> 00:19:11,443 "Weirdest sexual fantasy?" 488 00:19:11,443 --> 00:19:12,736 I have one, but it's not mine. 489 00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:15,072 [stammers] You already know that. 490 00:19:15,072 --> 00:19:17,199 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Course. 491 00:19:17,199 --> 00:19:18,784 You never told anyone though, did you? 492 00:19:18,784 --> 00:19:20,327 What? Oh, no. Uh, definitely not. 493 00:19:20,327 --> 00:19:23,872 So, the sound of Marge Simpson's voice actually gave him the horn. 494 00:19:23,872 --> 00:19:26,250 You know... [stutters] ...I was really drunk when I said that. [chuckles] 495 00:19:26,959 --> 00:19:29,545 "Tell me something you've never told anyone." 496 00:19:29,545 --> 00:19:32,130 - [blows] I don't know what a meme is. - Hmm? 497 00:19:32,130 --> 00:19:33,382 I don't mind Coldplay. 498 00:19:33,382 --> 00:19:35,676 - You're a monster. [chuckles] Too far. - I'm so sorry. 499 00:19:35,676 --> 00:19:36,844 I'm gonna leave my own flat. 500 00:19:36,844 --> 00:19:39,763 Uh, do you know what, I c-can't really think of anything. 501 00:19:39,763 --> 00:19:42,683 You're lying to me. You are. You're doing that thing with your nose 502 00:19:42,683 --> 00:19:43,934 - when you're hiding something. - No. 503 00:19:43,934 --> 00:19:46,645 Tell me what it is. Tell me what you're hiding. 504 00:19:47,354 --> 00:19:49,523 - Tell me, tell me, tell me. - Okay. Okay. Okay. 505 00:19:49,523 --> 00:19:52,109 You remember the Michael Bublé concert we went to 506 00:19:52,109 --> 00:19:53,569 when I got a bit carried away 507 00:19:53,569 --> 00:19:55,946 and had all those espresso martinis by mistake? 508 00:19:56,822 --> 00:20:00,033 Well, the next day I was out running and they all sort of hit me. 509 00:20:02,411 --> 00:20:04,121 Then something happened. 510 00:20:04,121 --> 00:20:06,039 - [dog barking] - Something else. 511 00:20:07,374 --> 00:20:09,209 [whining] 512 00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:10,127 [whispering] Go away. 513 00:20:10,127 --> 00:20:14,298 Ruby! [kisses] Here, girl. [kisses] Ruby? Where are you? 514 00:20:14,298 --> 00:20:15,757 [dog barking] 515 00:20:16,967 --> 00:20:17,968 Ruby? 516 00:20:18,677 --> 00:20:20,971 - Lovely morning. - Hiya. 517 00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:23,223 - [owner] Ruby? - [Veggie] It wasn't until I looked back 518 00:20:23,223 --> 00:20:24,433 that I realized she was doing it. 519 00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:27,186 How did you do such a massive poo-poo? 520 00:20:30,022 --> 00:20:31,106 No! Veggie! 521 00:20:31,106 --> 00:20:33,150 Don't laugh at that. It's not funny. 522 00:20:33,150 --> 00:20:35,444 - [laughing] - The dog was tiny. 523 00:20:35,444 --> 00:20:37,738 How she thought it came out of it, what's she feeding it? 524 00:20:37,738 --> 00:20:38,989 - [stammers] - [phone chimes] 525 00:20:39,907 --> 00:20:41,825 {\an8}- [Veggie sighs] Ah. Um... - [Lisa chuckling] 526 00:20:42,659 --> 00:20:44,828 [stammers] I, uh-- I need to get to bed. 527 00:20:44,828 --> 00:20:47,080 I-I really wanna have a workout in the morning. [stammers] 528 00:20:48,248 --> 00:20:49,082 Sorry. 529 00:20:49,917 --> 00:20:51,001 Okay. 530 00:20:51,001 --> 00:20:52,794 [Veggie grunts, kisses] 531 00:20:52,794 --> 00:20:54,588 [Lisa sighs, sniffs] 532 00:20:54,588 --> 00:20:55,881 [Veggie] Love you. 533 00:20:55,881 --> 00:20:58,050 Night. 534 00:21:01,887 --> 00:21:02,888 Oh. [sighs] 535 00:21:04,306 --> 00:21:05,307 [sniffs] 536 00:21:06,475 --> 00:21:07,476 [sighs] 537 00:21:08,602 --> 00:21:10,479 Yeah. And now actually try. 538 00:21:10,479 --> 00:21:11,980 - I am trying. - Okay. 539 00:21:11,980 --> 00:21:14,316 [chuckles] Is this the first time you've ever done this? 540 00:21:14,316 --> 00:21:15,234 Can you tell? 541 00:21:15,234 --> 00:21:16,944 Fast, fast, fast. As fast you can. 542 00:21:16,944 --> 00:21:18,946 [chuckles] Yeah, that looks really good. 543 00:21:18,946 --> 00:21:21,323 - Is that it? - Yes. [chuckles] And hook! 544 00:21:22,032 --> 00:21:23,033 - [grunts] - [chuckling] 545 00:21:23,033 --> 00:21:24,451 - There we go. Dead. Gone. - [phone vibrates] 546 00:21:24,451 --> 00:21:26,203 Um, yeah. Eh, jab! 547 00:21:26,203 --> 00:21:28,330 Jab, jab, jab, jab, jab, jab, jab. Super-- Superspeed. 548 00:21:28,330 --> 00:21:30,457 Yeah. As fast as you can. You're better than you thought. 549 00:21:33,669 --> 00:21:34,753 Veg? 550 00:21:34,753 --> 00:21:35,754 Yeah? 551 00:21:35,754 --> 00:21:36,839 I'll come too. 552 00:21:36,839 --> 00:21:37,756 - Yeah? - Yeah. 553 00:21:37,756 --> 00:21:39,550 - Oh, great. - [chuckles] 554 00:21:40,384 --> 00:21:41,593 [meditation app] Any minute now, 555 00:21:41,593 --> 00:21:46,014 you'll be ready to sleep the sleep of a thousand dreams. 556 00:21:46,557 --> 00:21:49,434 Let me take you on a journey of discovery. 557 00:21:49,434 --> 00:21:52,604 Let my voice wash over your body, 558 00:21:53,188 --> 00:21:56,149 as together we peel back the layers. 559 00:21:56,149 --> 00:21:58,068 Exposing ourselves to-- 560 00:22:02,197 --> 00:22:03,198 [whispering] Veggie? 561 00:22:04,992 --> 00:22:06,076 Vegger? 562 00:22:06,076 --> 00:22:07,286 [groans] 563 00:22:07,286 --> 00:22:10,914 If you had to live without one part of your body, what would it be? 564 00:22:11,498 --> 00:22:13,041 Yeah. I'll sort it in the morning. 565 00:22:16,086 --> 00:22:17,546 [upbeat music playing] 566 00:22:22,593 --> 00:22:24,136 Only three more miles to go. 567 00:22:24,970 --> 00:22:26,221 Great. [chuckles] Yeah, um... 568 00:22:27,306 --> 00:22:28,390 [stammering] 569 00:22:28,390 --> 00:22:29,474 [sighs] 570 00:22:36,607 --> 00:22:37,608 [sighs] 571 00:22:42,696 --> 00:22:44,031 [line ringing] 572 00:22:44,031 --> 00:22:47,034 - [phone vibrating] - [Lisa's parent sighs] 573 00:22:47,034 --> 00:22:49,411 - Who died? - What? Mum. Nobody. 574 00:22:49,411 --> 00:22:51,496 Oh, come on, Leese. You know the rules. 575 00:22:51,496 --> 00:22:54,166 Anything after 10:30 has to be death-related. 576 00:22:54,166 --> 00:22:56,835 Oh, yeah. Sorry. I forgot. No, no. It's just, um-- 577 00:22:56,835 --> 00:22:59,087 Come on, come on. Out with it. 578 00:22:59,087 --> 00:23:01,715 Well, no. Nothing. Just-- Okay, look, tiny thing. 579 00:23:02,758 --> 00:23:05,469 - You think I'm funny, right? - Funny as in weird or funny ha ha? 580 00:23:05,469 --> 00:23:06,970 - Funny ha ha. - Oh, Leese, 581 00:23:06,970 --> 00:23:08,430 I'm not the right person to ask. 582 00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:10,265 You know how uncomfortable I get around laughter. 583 00:23:10,265 --> 00:23:11,975 All right. Forget I said anything. 584 00:23:12,601 --> 00:23:13,435 How's Poppy? 585 00:23:13,435 --> 00:23:14,561 Yeah, she's fine. 586 00:23:14,561 --> 00:23:15,938 And Veggie? 587 00:23:15,938 --> 00:23:18,774 Yeah, you know. He's, uh-- He's working hard. [chuckles] 588 00:23:20,442 --> 00:23:21,902 - Leese? - Mmm? 589 00:23:21,902 --> 00:23:23,320 Why did you really call me? 590 00:23:24,071 --> 00:23:27,908 Well, I had better go. My taxi's outside. 591 00:23:27,908 --> 00:23:31,745 Yeah, um. This was-- This was fun. It was-- It was nice and stuff, you know. 592 00:23:31,745 --> 00:23:34,122 Um, maybe we should do it again, if-- if you want to. 593 00:23:34,122 --> 00:23:37,000 Uh, yes. I'd love to. 594 00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:37,918 Yeah? 595 00:23:37,918 --> 00:23:40,379 But no, I don't think so. 596 00:23:41,088 --> 00:23:42,214 - [sighs] - Oh. 597 00:23:42,214 --> 00:23:47,010 Danny, you're sweet. You're funny. You're bloody weird. I like you. 598 00:23:47,010 --> 00:23:50,430 Uh, that all sounds like good stuff. [stammers] Where-- Where did I go wrong? 599 00:23:51,306 --> 00:23:53,392 Do you know what you spent half of the night talking about? 600 00:23:55,227 --> 00:23:57,896 Your ex. You're obviously not over her. 601 00:23:57,896 --> 00:24:00,065 Wait. Chloe? I don't remember talking about Chloe at all. 602 00:24:00,065 --> 00:24:03,527 Chloe? No, I'm talking about the one who kept calling you all night. Lisa. 603 00:24:03,527 --> 00:24:06,697 Lisa? No, no, no, no, no. She's not my ex. We're just mates. 604 00:24:06,697 --> 00:24:09,992 Hmm. Well, I hate to break it to you, but you're not. 605 00:24:11,159 --> 00:24:12,452 Not from where I'm standing. 606 00:24:12,452 --> 00:24:13,412 Honestly, Mum. 607 00:24:13,412 --> 00:24:15,873 Me and Veggie, we're-- we're good. We're good. 608 00:24:15,873 --> 00:24:19,376 You know what I think of Veggie. The way he treats you. 609 00:24:19,376 --> 00:24:22,087 The way he's taken on Poppy like she's his own. 610 00:24:22,087 --> 00:24:26,925 What that man lacks in personality, he makes up for in reliability. 611 00:24:27,634 --> 00:24:28,760 I think he's great. 612 00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:30,262 Yeah, I know he's great. [chuckles] 613 00:24:30,262 --> 00:24:33,557 But you don't owe anyone anything in this life, Leese. 614 00:24:33,557 --> 00:24:36,643 If you're questioning things, if you're having doubts, 615 00:24:36,643 --> 00:24:41,899 if that's what this is, then it's okay. It doesn't make you a bad person. 616 00:24:43,859 --> 00:24:46,612 No, honestly, I think I'm just-- [stammers] It's just lack of sleep. 617 00:24:46,612 --> 00:24:47,821 I'll be fine in the morning. 618 00:24:48,989 --> 00:24:50,157 All right. If you're sure. 619 00:24:50,157 --> 00:24:53,076 - Yeah, I am. Thanks. - For what? 620 00:24:53,076 --> 00:24:54,912 - Well, for listening. - Well, I'm your mum, aren't I? 621 00:24:54,912 --> 00:24:55,996 Yeah. [chuckles] 622 00:24:56,747 --> 00:24:58,540 And you do think I'm funny ha ha, right, Mum? 623 00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:00,042 Oh, don't beat yourself up. 624 00:25:00,042 --> 00:25:03,170 Me and your dad was never funny, so it's not your fault. 625 00:25:03,170 --> 00:25:04,171 What? Mum. 626 00:25:04,171 --> 00:25:05,714 - [birds chirping] - Oh, great. 627 00:25:05,714 --> 00:25:08,425 Now the birds are up. Gonna have to find me earplugs now. 628 00:25:08,425 --> 00:25:10,677 - Look, try and get some sleep, all right? - [sighs] 629 00:25:10,677 --> 00:25:12,888 - Okay. Night. - Bye. Night night. 630 00:25:16,183 --> 00:25:17,476 I'm well funny. 631 00:25:18,393 --> 00:25:20,395 Shame. [kisses] 632 00:25:21,647 --> 00:25:23,524 I think we'd have been brilliant together. 633 00:25:23,524 --> 00:25:24,441 [Danny] Yeah. 634 00:25:28,862 --> 00:25:29,863 Bye, Danny. 635 00:25:29,863 --> 00:25:30,948 Bye, Amy. 636 00:25:37,913 --> 00:25:39,331 [breathing heavily] 637 00:25:39,331 --> 00:25:41,834 Maybe give me a call if you ever-- [screams] 638 00:25:41,834 --> 00:25:42,876 Oh, God! 639 00:25:42,876 --> 00:25:44,211 Get it out! Get it out! 640 00:25:44,211 --> 00:25:46,755 - Oh, God. Hang on. - [whimpering] 641 00:25:46,755 --> 00:25:49,174 Oh, please. [grunts] 642 00:25:49,925 --> 00:25:51,760 [gasping] Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 643 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,053 Adam, quick! It's an emergency! 644 00:25:53,053 --> 00:25:55,389 - [breathing heavily] My bloody finger. - [gasps] 645 00:25:55,389 --> 00:25:57,432 Yeah. [stammers] Where is it? Um... [stammers] 646 00:25:57,432 --> 00:25:58,976 [whimpers, breathes deeply] 647 00:25:58,976 --> 00:26:01,645 Okay. I've got it. [yelps] I've got it. I've got it. I've got it. 648 00:26:02,396 --> 00:26:05,065 [breathes shakily] 649 00:26:05,065 --> 00:26:06,942 - [whimpering, breathes heavily] - Adam, bring ice! 650 00:26:06,942 --> 00:26:10,571 [stammers] Um, don't panic. It's all right. 651 00:26:10,571 --> 00:26:12,072 [grunts, breathes heavily] 652 00:26:12,614 --> 00:26:13,740 What are you doing? 653 00:26:14,867 --> 00:26:15,868 [gasps] 654 00:26:16,451 --> 00:26:17,452 Who needed ice? 655 00:26:17,995 --> 00:26:18,954 [Amy gasps] 656 00:26:19,580 --> 00:26:20,789 [breathes heavily] 657 00:26:26,545 --> 00:26:27,546 [sighs] 658 00:26:30,090 --> 00:26:30,924 [sighs] 659 00:26:42,436 --> 00:26:46,190 [Lisa] Hiya. Hope you had a good night. Just checking in. 660 00:26:46,190 --> 00:26:48,317 [gasps] Um, oh, yeah. Eh. Knock knock. 661 00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:51,612 Come on, Danny. Join in. Knock knock. 662 00:26:52,654 --> 00:26:53,572 Who's there? 663 00:26:53,572 --> 00:26:55,616 - [Lisa] Control freak. - Control-- 664 00:26:55,616 --> 00:26:57,242 - Now you say, "Control freak who?" - [chuckles] 665 00:26:57,242 --> 00:27:00,537 Anyway, hope tonight was fun. Speak soon. 666 00:27:06,710 --> 00:27:08,921 - [chattering on TV] - [phone chimes] 667 00:27:13,008 --> 00:27:14,468 [chuckles] 668 00:27:17,012 --> 00:27:18,805 [typing]