1
00:00:04,463 --> 00:00:06,924
If I was single, and it's cuffing season,
2
00:00:06,924 --> 00:00:09,551
I would definitely try
to slide in someone's DM
3
00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:13,138
or see if-if my friend has a friend.
4
00:00:13,138 --> 00:00:14,556
Um...
5
00:00:14,556 --> 00:00:17,309
Yeah, I'm not just gonna be by myself
in cuffing season.
6
00:00:17,309 --> 00:00:20,020
Oh, cuffing season's hunting season,
you know?
7
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,981
If, uh, you don't have
a significant other already in place,
8
00:00:22,981 --> 00:00:24,650
you go out hunting every weekend.
9
00:00:24,650 --> 00:00:26,818
♪ Gimme one margarita,
I'ma open my legs ♪
10
00:00:26,818 --> 00:00:29,321
♪ Gimme two margaritas,
I'ma give you some head ♪
11
00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:32,073
♪ Gimme three margaritas
I'ma put it in my puss ♪
12
00:00:32,073 --> 00:00:34,785
♪ Gimme four margaritas
I'ma put it in my tush ♪
13
00:00:34,785 --> 00:00:37,120
♪ Gimme five margaritas,
margaritas... ♪
14
00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,623
Thank you!
15
00:00:39,623 --> 00:00:41,625
Um...
16
00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,043
Ooh! Let's grab that table over there.
17
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,587
No, no, no, we're gonna stand at the bar
and look sexy and approachable.
18
00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:47,589
If men are gonna reject me,
I'd much rather be seated.
19
00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:49,091
- You know, set expectations.
- Come on!
20
00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:50,384
Plus, this bitch loves to sit!
21
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:52,219
Great, a dark musty corner.
22
00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:54,763
Sitting is very highly underrated.
23
00:00:54,763 --> 00:00:56,598
If they can see us.
24
00:00:56,598 --> 00:00:57,808
Oh! Hey!
25
00:00:57,808 --> 00:01:00,686
Someone is making eyes
at you from the bar.
26
00:01:00,686 --> 00:01:03,438
Oh, no thank you. No, no, no, no.
27
00:01:03,438 --> 00:01:04,731
Do you even wanna meet someone?
28
00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:08,110
Of course, I do, you know?
29
00:01:08,110 --> 00:01:09,945
Not only do I need to,
like, forget about Rory,
30
00:01:09,945 --> 00:01:11,655
but I need to move on from Alex.
31
00:01:11,655 --> 00:01:13,574
- Yes, you do.
- Good. So, we know our goal.
32
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:14,950
Let us help you get there.
33
00:01:14,950 --> 00:01:16,410
Okay, what you need to know about me
34
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,245
is that because of societal standards,
35
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:20,122
I'm like... human cilantro.
36
00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,791
Seriously!
To some guys, I'm like soap,
37
00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:24,376
and the ones that do want me,
38
00:01:24,376 --> 00:01:26,295
they're already up on
somebody else's taco.
39
00:01:26,295 --> 00:01:28,255
What about that guy that was flirting
with you in class?
40
00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:30,757
Oh, Carlos!
Yes, yes, yes, yes, the fruit agent.
41
00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:33,677
No!
I already did the work thing,
42
00:01:33,677 --> 00:01:35,387
and it was a certifiable shit show.
43
00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:36,889
But I met Lamar at work.
44
00:01:36,889 --> 00:01:38,974
Wait, why was he at Sephora?
Fashion week.
45
00:01:38,974 --> 00:01:42,394
When you're a makeup artist,
you meet fine-ass models on the reg,
46
00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:45,189
like all day,
and, honey, they all check for me.
47
00:01:45,189 --> 00:01:47,816
I hadn't really thought
about Carlos like that.
48
00:01:47,816 --> 00:01:50,235
- Well, have you tried him out?
- What do you mean?
49
00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:52,112
Oh, I audition all my conquests.
50
00:01:52,905 --> 00:01:55,949
I do a dry fantasy run,
and if it becomes a wet fantasy run?
51
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:58,702
I make those dreams come true.
52
00:01:58,702 --> 00:02:00,954
Okay, well, here's
to making dreams come...
53
00:02:02,831 --> 00:02:05,459
I'll send you an app to set
the mood. Thank me later.
54
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:07,294
♪ Gimme, gimme, gimme a beat! ♪
55
00:02:09,421 --> 00:02:11,924
Okay, Allie,
let's see what your app can do.
56
00:02:14,718 --> 00:02:17,930
My play premiere was a huge success.
57
00:02:17,930 --> 00:02:21,725
I was giddy and tipsy from
so many people congratulating me,
58
00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:24,186
and that last glass of
Prosecco certainly didn't help.
59
00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:26,438
I sneak backstage to center myself
60
00:02:26,438 --> 00:02:28,774
when I see that sexy actor Herman.
61
00:02:29,358 --> 00:02:32,903
I'd always heard about understudies having
a Star is Born moment.
62
00:02:32,903 --> 00:02:35,113
I should really see that movie again.
63
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:36,490
The original, not Gaga's.
64
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:38,659
Hey, girl, stop letting your mind wander.
65
00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:42,287
You're supposed to be thinking
about Carlos. Now, get to work.
66
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,249
I realized we were alone backstage.
67
00:02:45,249 --> 00:02:47,918
He met my gaze
and slowly sauntered over.
68
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:50,838
I was wondering if, uh,
if you can help me.
69
00:02:50,838 --> 00:02:53,006
I got sewed into these pants,
70
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:56,510
and it's kind of embarrassing,
but I can't take them off.
71
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:59,721
All I wanted to do
was rip those pants right off,
72
00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:02,099
but we needed them
for tomorrow's performance.
73
00:03:02,808 --> 00:03:05,227
So, I found a pin
and knelt in front of him
74
00:03:05,227 --> 00:03:08,689
to undo the stitches. I felt flush.
75
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:12,276
Was it the Prosecco, or was it him?
76
00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:17,656
You're supposed to be Carlos.
77
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:19,116
You tell him, girl.
78
00:03:19,116 --> 00:03:21,535
This is supposed to be
a Carlos fantasy run.
79
00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:24,580
Now help me, help you, and focus.
80
00:03:24,580 --> 00:03:25,831
Where was I?
Oh, yes.
81
00:03:25,831 --> 00:03:27,207
The air was electric
82
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:30,502
as I slowly loosened
each stitch on those pants.
83
00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:32,296
I was so close to his Jack in the box,
84
00:03:32,296 --> 00:03:35,048
I could tell he was ready
to pop right out.
85
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:38,510
Tonight's performance was over,
but I was up for an encore,
86
00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:40,429
and he was definitely up, too.
87
00:03:40,429 --> 00:03:42,931
Careful. That tickles.
88
00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,850
Wait, why are we letting him back in?
89
00:03:44,850 --> 00:03:46,810
I just wanna make you happy.
90
00:03:46,810 --> 00:03:48,604
Because I know he can get me there,
91
00:03:48,604 --> 00:03:50,480
and I'm gonna be late for work.
92
00:03:55,819 --> 00:03:58,780
Well, there's some naming drama
with the ghost kitchen.
93
00:03:58,780 --> 00:04:00,616
Sir Rise-a-Lot is the front runner,
94
00:04:00,616 --> 00:04:03,160
but Kaya wants my new sourdough starter
95
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:04,703
to be Li'l Yeasty.
96
00:04:04,703 --> 00:04:06,038
That's a good one.
97
00:04:06,038 --> 00:04:07,539
But like,
why's it gotta be li'l, you know?
98
00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:10,375
Yeah.
Oh, shizz.
99
00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:13,545
I'm out of Mel's hazelnut creamer.
100
00:04:13,545 --> 00:04:14,922
Never mind, I will crush up some--
101
00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:17,299
No, no, actually, uh,
just one coffee for me.
102
00:04:17,299 --> 00:04:18,717
Let's go, let's go.
103
00:04:18,717 --> 00:04:22,304
Uh-oh. Trouble in paradise?
104
00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:23,722
No.
105
00:04:23,722 --> 00:04:26,350
Wheatney Houston, yes.
106
00:04:27,476 --> 00:04:28,685
Hi.
107
00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:32,731
As managers, you are the first line
of defense against sexual harassment,
108
00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:36,735
so it's important to know
what constitutes harassment.
109
00:04:36,735 --> 00:04:40,030
Well, that can include
unwanted sexual advances,
110
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:41,657
comments about appearance,
111
00:04:41,657 --> 00:04:43,867
catcalling, sexual innuendo.
112
00:04:43,867 --> 00:04:45,744
Having a vivid dream about a coworker?
113
00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:48,330
Pardon me?
114
00:04:49,331 --> 00:04:50,832
Uh...
115
00:04:50,832 --> 00:04:54,878
Having a vivid... dream
a-about a coworker,
116
00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:56,922
does that-- does that count?
117
00:04:57,589 --> 00:04:59,132
Not if you don't say it out loud.
118
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,301
Noted.
119
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:04,179
As managers, you will be
the eyes and ears of JFK.
120
00:05:04,179 --> 00:05:06,932
And when it comes to romantic
relationships in the workplace,
121
00:05:06,932 --> 00:05:09,977
it's okay to ask a person out once.
122
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:13,605
But, if they say no,
asking them again would be harassment.
123
00:05:13,605 --> 00:05:16,567
What if you've been hanging out with
someone, say, for a month and some change,
124
00:05:16,567 --> 00:05:19,653
but you didn't have the DTR convo yet, hypothetically?
125
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:21,321
I don't know what DTR means.
126
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:23,323
"Define the relationship."
127
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:26,159
Best not to shit where you eat.
128
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:27,244
Pardon my French.
129
00:05:27,953 --> 00:05:30,247
As managers, it's best for you
130
00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:32,791
to just disclose
any workplace relationship
131
00:05:32,791 --> 00:05:35,586
to the head of HR, so there are no issues
if it goes south.
132
00:05:35,586 --> 00:05:39,131
I can tell you that
one in three US workers
133
00:05:39,131 --> 00:05:41,049
have or are currently involved
134
00:05:41,049 --> 00:05:43,802
in a romantic workplace relationship,
135
00:05:43,802 --> 00:05:45,470
and the majority of those people,
136
00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:48,223
they did not disclose to their employers.
137
00:05:48,223 --> 00:05:50,267
So, my High Flyers,
138
00:05:50,267 --> 00:05:52,477
the moral of this story is...
139
00:05:52,477 --> 00:05:55,230
disclose, disclose, disclose!
140
00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:58,192
You don't have to do it three times.
Just the once will be fine.
141
00:05:58,192 --> 00:06:01,153
The other two times, I did for emphasis.
142
00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:10,037
I found your earrings this morning.
143
00:06:10,037 --> 00:06:12,623
Why are you treating it
like it's evidence?
144
00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:14,208
I coulda got it tonight.
145
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:16,585
Does this mean
you'll finally stay at my place?
146
00:06:16,585 --> 00:06:19,588
- No, not with your mama in the next room.
- Boy, she don't care.
147
00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:22,841
Besides, she told me to
invite you to Thanksgiving.
148
00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:25,552
She can throw it down.
149
00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:29,556
You make it hard to say no.
Let me see if I can work out my schedule.
150
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,099
You make the schedule.
151
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:34,937
Oh, um,
I disclosed our relationship to HR.
152
00:06:36,188 --> 00:06:37,231
Wait, why?
153
00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:40,984
You're a manager.
You should know that.
154
00:06:42,528 --> 00:06:44,321
It's part of the sexual
harassment seminar.
155
00:06:44,321 --> 00:06:45,697
No, yeah, yeah, you right,
you right.
156
00:06:45,697 --> 00:06:46,782
- Yeah.
- You right.
157
00:06:46,782 --> 00:06:49,785
What else did you learn today?
158
00:06:50,369 --> 00:06:53,372
That telling you about the dream I had,
159
00:06:54,373 --> 00:06:55,666
where I handcuffed you...
160
00:06:55,666 --> 00:06:59,211
- Oh.
- ...is definitely
161
00:06:59,211 --> 00:07:01,547
sexual harassment.
162
00:07:01,547 --> 00:07:04,383
- Ms. Hill, you...
- Mm-hmm?
163
00:07:04,383 --> 00:07:06,593
...are very, very convincing.
164
00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:12,391
Why don't you notify HR that I will
be coming to yours for Thanksgiving.
165
00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:15,227
- Deal.
- Deal.
166
00:07:15,227 --> 00:07:16,979
Tell your mama, too.
167
00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:19,648
- Bye.
- Bye.
168
00:07:24,987 --> 00:07:26,989
You know you're amazing, right?
169
00:07:30,409 --> 00:07:33,370
Oh yeah, I just...
I just want you to be happy.
170
00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:35,455
Frick!
171
00:07:35,455 --> 00:07:36,790
Why are you still here?
172
00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:38,876
You're gonna be late for your pickup.
I know.
173
00:07:38,876 --> 00:07:40,919
I'm supposed to be
having lunch with Mike.
174
00:07:40,919 --> 00:07:42,421
He's my suitor from Lost and Found.
175
00:07:42,421 --> 00:07:44,047
Gross.
176
00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:46,842
- I'll take it if you take my Friday night.
- Really? Nice!
177
00:07:46,842 --> 00:07:48,218
Nope, we don't do that.
178
00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:50,888
Oh.
179
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:55,350
Bachelorette in New Orleans.
180
00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:57,978
- Uh-huh. Mm.
- Okay, well, one piece of advice.
181
00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:01,523
No matter how drunk you get,
those beads have no value.
182
00:08:01,523 --> 00:08:04,693
Keep your ladies covered.
183
00:08:04,693 --> 00:08:06,486
It's not that type of bachelorette.
184
00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:08,238
Then what kind of bachelorette is it?
185
00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:12,034
We're just a bunch of married ladies,
in matching PJs,
186
00:08:12,034 --> 00:08:14,203
giving the bride
lessons from the battlefield.
187
00:08:14,203 --> 00:08:16,413
- Ah. Well, can I come, please?
- Uh-huh.
188
00:08:16,413 --> 00:08:19,166
Man, I thought I'd have
relationships figured out by now,
189
00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:21,668
but I definitely don't.
190
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:24,713
- Boy problems?
- Yeah, it's complicated.
191
00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:28,675
I thought I was over my ex,
but he is living in my head rent-free.
192
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:31,178
Mm. Girl, been there.
193
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:33,347
Yeah, it's like, part of me knows
194
00:08:33,347 --> 00:08:36,767
that I need to make a clean break of it
and just move on,
195
00:08:36,767 --> 00:08:39,144
- but it's hard.
- Oh, yeah.
196
00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:43,106
So hard because we work together
every single day.
197
00:08:43,106 --> 00:08:44,399
Clarissa!
Julie!
198
00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:46,860
- Julie!?
- You made it!
199
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:49,404
Wild horses and six pins in my ankle
200
00:08:49,404 --> 00:08:51,114
couldn't keep me away!
201
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:54,201
- Mel, could I talk to you for a second?
- Uh-huh.
202
00:08:54,660 --> 00:08:57,621
This was supposed to be Patti's pickup.
203
00:08:57,621 --> 00:08:58,914
And now I know why.
204
00:08:58,914 --> 00:08:59,998
So...
205
00:08:59,998 --> 00:09:02,960
me and Julie had a fight last night
about our exes at our wedding.
206
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,795
- Mm-hmm.
- Uh, and I had to tell her about us.
207
00:09:04,795 --> 00:09:06,630
- Wait, she doesn't know about us?
- No, it's not that.
208
00:09:06,630 --> 00:09:08,757
It'd just be great if you could,
like, not be here right now.
209
00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:10,676
Yeah, lucky for you,
I don't wanna be here.
210
00:09:10,676 --> 00:09:11,802
Mel!
211
00:09:12,678 --> 00:09:14,680
I've heard so much about you.
It's nice to finally meet.
212
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,014
Right! It's just...
213
00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:20,227
Uh, Clarissa,
214
00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:22,646
this is Mel.
215
00:09:22,646 --> 00:09:24,898
Wait. You're Mel?
216
00:09:27,442 --> 00:09:30,070
You know what? Uh--
I have to pick up a foreign dignitary,
217
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:31,822
so I'ma get on that and get you seated
218
00:09:31,822 --> 00:09:35,325
so you guys can get the show on the road,
am I right?
219
00:09:35,325 --> 00:09:37,244
Mm, how does this work?
220
00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:38,829
Attention, passengers.
221
00:09:38,829 --> 00:09:42,457
The terminal is now on lockdown.
All flights are grounded,
222
00:09:42,457 --> 00:09:45,043
and you cannot leave the terminal
until further notice.
223
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:48,422
We appreciate your patience
as we work to resolve this situation.
224
00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,465
- Thank you.
- Shit.
225
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:51,675
So, we're stuck here?
226
00:09:51,675 --> 00:09:54,219
Mm-hmm.
227
00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:57,014
Yeah. Yeah, we are.
228
00:10:02,394 --> 00:10:04,688
Serena! Serena!
229
00:10:04,688 --> 00:10:06,523
All this is unnecessary.
230
00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:09,067
Serena's a wanderer, always has been.
She'll wander back soon.
231
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:12,029
I'm sorry, but since you already checked
her in as an unaccompanied minor,
232
00:10:12,029 --> 00:10:15,199
she's the airline's responsibility
until she's found.
233
00:10:15,199 --> 00:10:18,702
Serena!
- Now we know why we're on lockdown.
234
00:10:18,702 --> 00:10:20,204
Well, there goes the swamp tour.
235
00:10:20,204 --> 00:10:23,040
You know what?
I should get to the security office ASAP.
236
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:25,042
- I'll drive you.
- Oh! Okay, great.
237
00:10:25,042 --> 00:10:27,878
No. No, no!
Is everything okay?
238
00:10:27,878 --> 00:10:30,589
I checked in the luggage that had
all the scavenger hunt lists inside,
239
00:10:30,589 --> 00:10:31,840
so I only have this one copy.
240
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,467
Aw, man. Mm.
241
00:10:33,467 --> 00:10:36,303
I figured we could do it while we wait,
but [sighs] now what?
242
00:10:38,514 --> 00:10:39,848
Y-You know what, Yummy?
243
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:41,683
That is actually solvable.
We'll just go to my office
244
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:42,893
and make some copies.
245
00:10:42,893 --> 00:10:44,895
No, no, you need to do your job,
so we can get outta here.
246
00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:46,313
But, maybe Mel could take me.
247
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:47,606
- Oh, no.
- Oh no, she's busy.
248
00:10:47,606 --> 00:10:49,900
- Super busy. Just woo!
- It'd be really quick.
249
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:51,109
Thanks so much!
250
00:10:52,778 --> 00:10:55,239
Alright, bye.
251
00:10:57,366 --> 00:10:59,743
Oh, Lord have mercy.
252
00:10:59,743 --> 00:11:02,621
♪ I've got yo man,
and you can't do anything ♪
253
00:11:02,621 --> 00:11:05,457
So, what's on this scavenger hunt list?
254
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:07,876
Change shirts with a stranger,
get frisked by a cop,
255
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:09,711
sign a guy's butt.
256
00:11:09,711 --> 00:11:13,048
I mean, I don't see how Alex
could find these "inappropriate."
257
00:11:13,048 --> 00:11:14,800
Well, he's just probably being protective.
258
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,927
- Yeah, that's what he said.
- Mm.
259
00:11:16,927 --> 00:11:19,304
But lucky for him,
I like to keep things spicy.
260
00:11:19,304 --> 00:11:21,807
I bet you do.
261
00:11:21,807 --> 00:11:25,269
So, Clarissa tells me you're hung up
on some guy at work.
262
00:11:25,269 --> 00:11:27,187
- It's not Alex, is it?
- Oh! No, no, no, no.
263
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:29,356
It's Carlton... Herman.
264
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,691
He's a merman-- model-- mo--
265
00:11:30,691 --> 00:11:32,192
- He models swimwear.
- Oh, okay.
266
00:11:32,192 --> 00:11:34,319
Uh, when he's not doing business,
my business,
267
00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:36,238
- he's all up in my business.
- Oh!
268
00:11:36,238 --> 00:11:38,657
Um, but yeah. Herman is my nickname
269
00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:40,492
for him with my friends, so...
270
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:42,286
My nickname for Alex is Energizer Bunny.
271
00:11:42,286 --> 00:11:45,247
- Oh. Ah. Ooh!
- He could keep going and going...
272
00:11:45,247 --> 00:11:47,583
- Did you have a nickname for Alex?
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
273
00:11:47,583 --> 00:11:50,085
I don't give boyfriends nicknames.
274
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:52,254
It's just plain old Alex.
275
00:11:52,254 --> 00:11:54,506
Alright, here we go.
276
00:11:54,506 --> 00:11:56,425
Let's get you some copies, alright?
277
00:11:56,425 --> 00:11:59,178
♪ And you can't do anything about it ♪
278
00:11:59,178 --> 00:12:00,262
Wait, boyfriend?
279
00:12:00,762 --> 00:12:03,348
I thought it was a little three months,
friends with benefits thing.
280
00:12:03,348 --> 00:12:05,726
Nope. [laughs] It was exactly that.
Not a big deal.
281
00:12:05,726 --> 00:12:07,644
Yeah, right. Of course not.
282
00:12:09,021 --> 00:12:10,564
Oh, God, no, it's just Alex told me
283
00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,566
that you were very clear
you didn't want anything more.
284
00:12:12,566 --> 00:12:14,651
No, I didn't, and I don't.
285
00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,278
Right.
286
00:12:16,278 --> 00:12:18,447
Look, we're so glad that
you're coming to our wedding.
287
00:12:18,447 --> 00:12:20,282
Alex told me that you're afraid to fly.
288
00:12:20,282 --> 00:12:21,909
Yep.
289
00:12:21,909 --> 00:12:24,494
You're such a good friend for doing that.
290
00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:27,664
I hope this lockdown lasts all day too.
291
00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:30,584
Shit, I'm tryna take all y'all money.
Oh, yeah, that's my book.
292
00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:32,753
What's this about Tina and Thanksgiving?
293
00:12:32,753 --> 00:12:34,880
- Please tell me you didn't say yes.
- It's just dinner!
294
00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:37,591
Aw, y'all cute or whatever.
295
00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:40,052
It's not dinner, T,
it's Thanksgiving dinner.
296
00:12:40,052 --> 00:12:42,137
That's why they named it!
Look, bro, next you know,
297
00:12:42,137 --> 00:12:44,473
she gonna be at your house,
every night, bonnet on.
298
00:12:44,473 --> 00:12:47,851
Facts. Probably canceling her cable
and utilities right now.
299
00:12:47,851 --> 00:12:50,312
Don't pay them no mind.
- It's not even that serious.
300
00:12:50,312 --> 00:12:51,855
We literally just started dating.
301
00:12:51,855 --> 00:12:53,482
Oh, "Just started dating."
Like a year ago!
302
00:12:53,482 --> 00:12:55,192
Okay, okay, let's settle this.
303
00:12:55,192 --> 00:12:58,570
Has she left any random shit at your spot?
304
00:12:58,570 --> 00:13:01,448
Uh, a pair of earrings,
but it was an accident.
305
00:13:01,448 --> 00:13:03,867
Okay, if it was one earring,
it would be an accident.
306
00:13:03,867 --> 00:13:06,662
A pair of earrings, she's saying,
"Oh, we go together now."
307
00:13:06,662 --> 00:13:08,580
Exactly. Bro, what'd I tell you?
308
00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:10,832
These girls are smart! Three stacks.
309
00:13:10,832 --> 00:13:12,376
Wh-What about your earrings?
310
00:13:12,376 --> 00:13:14,795
Do you leave them at home,
or you got a place to leave 'em?
311
00:13:14,795 --> 00:13:17,130
- What are you doing right now?
- I'm trying to hit on her.
312
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:21,009
Bro, why would you say that?
- Okay, look, anyway!
313
00:13:21,009 --> 00:13:22,803
If you aren't serious about Tina,
314
00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:25,097
you need to break up with her
before the holidays.
315
00:13:25,097 --> 00:13:28,141
Look, do I like her?
Yeah. Of course. She's great.
316
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:30,561
But is she the one? I don't know.
317
00:13:30,561 --> 00:13:33,105
I mean, how does anyone know?
318
00:13:33,105 --> 00:13:35,357
You know, bro, honestly, for me,
319
00:13:35,357 --> 00:13:38,151
it's when the imperfections stop being
the deal breaker.
320
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,070
That's when you know,
you know what I'm saying?
321
00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:42,823
Like, I knew Didi was the one
when I would share everything with her.
322
00:13:42,823 --> 00:13:45,200
- Aw.
- Everything? Even your food?
323
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:46,785
Oh, especially my food, bro. For real.
324
00:13:46,785 --> 00:13:50,205
I'm not sharing my food with nobody.
I will never be that in love, straight up.
325
00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:53,458
[laughs] Famous last words.
You're gonna be alone forever.
326
00:13:53,458 --> 00:13:56,378
We thank you for your continued patience
327
00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:57,713
during this lockdown.
328
00:13:57,713 --> 00:13:59,006
Oh, no way.
329
00:14:00,132 --> 00:14:02,926
Are you looking for anything
in particular? Can I help?
330
00:14:03,594 --> 00:14:04,845
When I started dating Alex,
331
00:14:04,845 --> 00:14:07,222
he would take me to this
Thai restaurant all the time.
332
00:14:07,222 --> 00:14:09,933
He thought he was being all fancy
ordering off the menu.
333
00:14:09,933 --> 00:14:11,852
"We'll take the good shrimp,
not the frozen shrimp.
334
00:14:11,852 --> 00:14:14,688
And tell Gus to make it extra spicy."
335
00:14:14,688 --> 00:14:16,190
Um...
336
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:19,526
That's a good order.
I, um, I used to work there.
337
00:14:22,905 --> 00:14:24,907
You know, you...
338
00:14:24,907 --> 00:14:27,868
you have such a pretty face.
339
00:14:27,868 --> 00:14:31,079
There has to be someone that can help you
move on from Mr. Merman.
340
00:14:31,830 --> 00:14:34,958
Yeah, there's this guy
in my management class,
341
00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:38,170
but, you know, he entered the chat,
but I don't know.
342
00:14:38,170 --> 00:14:39,755
Okay, fun fact.
343
00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:42,925
I wasn't so sure of Alex
when we first met.
344
00:14:43,592 --> 00:14:45,469
But then, he surprised me
345
00:14:45,469 --> 00:14:48,639
by making me fall in love with him.
346
00:14:53,769 --> 00:14:56,522
I probably shouldn't tell you this, but...
347
00:14:56,522 --> 00:14:58,982
Alex is looking at jobs
at Hartsfield-Jackson.
348
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:01,693
Cool.
349
00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:04,196
I could put in a good word
with him if you like.
350
00:15:04,196 --> 00:15:06,198
Yeah, that would-- Oh! Look, okay!
351
00:15:06,198 --> 00:15:09,201
It's always the toner.
352
00:15:09,201 --> 00:15:11,453
Um, it's always
the last place you look. We should,
353
00:15:11,453 --> 00:15:13,914
- you know, probably test it out.
- Yeah, let's test it out.
354
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:16,041
Just so he won't forget.
355
00:15:16,041 --> 00:15:18,252
Of course you have perfect titties.
356
00:15:21,755 --> 00:15:24,174
Oh, my God.
357
00:15:24,174 --> 00:15:26,301
What!?
358
00:15:26,301 --> 00:15:29,388
He's gonna love this.
359
00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:12,097
I've been waiting for you.
360
00:16:18,270 --> 00:16:20,397
It's crazy how much
random food is in here,
361
00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:22,566
and it doesn't smell like a compost pile.
362
00:16:22,566 --> 00:16:24,484
You'd be surprised what
palo santo can do, you know?
363
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:26,236
Mm. That's true, powerful stuff.
364
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:28,238
- Okay, be honest.
- Mm-hmm.
365
00:16:28,238 --> 00:16:30,199
How much of this shit
do you end up stealing?
366
00:16:30,199 --> 00:16:32,743
Honestly, most of it.
367
00:16:33,869 --> 00:16:37,539
Listen, it's not like people can come back
looking for it or whatever. They...
368
00:16:37,539 --> 00:16:40,792
go off to whatever country they're from,
leave all this stuff to go bad.
369
00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:42,544
- Better to not waste it.
- Ah.
370
00:16:42,544 --> 00:16:44,713
You are doing a good service, sir.
371
00:16:44,713 --> 00:16:47,424
Thank you.
372
00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:49,468
I'm actually surprised you came.
373
00:16:50,636 --> 00:16:52,095
Well, I'm...
374
00:16:52,888 --> 00:16:54,306
full of surprises.
375
00:16:57,309 --> 00:16:59,520
- L-Let me give you a tour.
- Yeah, yeah.
376
00:17:00,437 --> 00:17:02,773
He tastes like salami.
377
00:17:02,773 --> 00:17:05,067
- I'm sensing a theme.
- ♪ Baby baby ♪
378
00:17:05,067 --> 00:17:07,319
I can do this, just like I practiced.
379
00:17:10,531 --> 00:17:12,199
Thank God I shaved this morning.
380
00:17:13,909 --> 00:17:15,452
Is he doing the alphabet?
381
00:17:16,870 --> 00:17:19,540
Nope, just the letter I, italicized.
382
00:17:20,749 --> 00:17:23,210
Aw, he's so proud of himself.
383
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:24,336
Good for you.
384
00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:26,922
Is that a condom or chocolate?
385
00:17:26,922 --> 00:17:28,173
Either way, yes.
386
00:17:28,173 --> 00:17:30,342
Ooh!
387
00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:33,762
Not a chocolate.
388
00:17:35,848 --> 00:17:38,517
Ooh! It's chocolate week on
British Bake Off.
389
00:17:38,517 --> 00:17:41,144
Girl, focus up before it's over.
390
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:45,190
And it's over. Okay.
391
00:17:47,025 --> 00:17:48,110
Whoo!
392
00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:52,322
That was fun, right?
I miss Alex.
393
00:17:53,282 --> 00:17:55,576
Yeah, it was. Totally.
394
00:17:55,576 --> 00:17:57,953
Uh, where'd you get
that scar on your chest?
395
00:17:57,953 --> 00:17:59,872
Oh.
We went camping upstate last summer,
396
00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:02,332
and I-I tried this Bear Grylls hack,
and I was--
397
00:18:02,332 --> 00:18:04,793
We? What do you mean by we?
398
00:18:05,878 --> 00:18:07,713
You don't care that I got a missus, right?
399
00:18:10,424 --> 00:18:13,677
- You're married. [snickers] Of course.
- Uh-huh.
400
00:18:13,677 --> 00:18:15,637
Mel, what's the big deal?
N-No one has to know.
401
00:18:15,637 --> 00:18:17,806
I do! I know!
402
00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:19,433
Why would you cheat on your wife?
403
00:18:19,433 --> 00:18:21,351
I don't wanna talk about
my marriage right now.
404
00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:24,730
Okay, yeah, and I wanted to cum,
and that didn't happen for me,
405
00:18:24,730 --> 00:18:26,773
so I guess this didn't work out
for either of us.
406
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:29,067
Wow.
Okay--
407
00:18:29,067 --> 00:18:31,153
You know what?
Just one thing. Why me?
408
00:18:31,153 --> 00:18:33,071
Why not? You're beautiful--
409
00:18:33,071 --> 00:18:34,781
Ew! Ew. Ew.
410
00:18:34,781 --> 00:18:36,491
We're two adults,
411
00:18:36,491 --> 00:18:39,203
killing time during a lockdown.
412
00:18:39,203 --> 00:18:42,372
I-I seriously don't understand
why you're getting so upset.
413
00:18:43,332 --> 00:18:45,834
Because I shat where I ate!
414
00:18:49,004 --> 00:18:51,632
Pull it together, pull it together.
415
00:19:12,069 --> 00:19:14,988
- What are you doing back here?
- Nothing.
416
00:19:14,988 --> 00:19:17,157
Nothing is my favorite thing to do.
417
00:19:17,157 --> 00:19:18,617
Can I sit there?
418
00:19:18,617 --> 00:19:21,036
I am very much in the mood
419
00:19:21,036 --> 00:19:23,622
to do absolutely nothing.
420
00:19:25,165 --> 00:19:27,876
Well, a lot of people are
looking for you right now.
421
00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:29,920
Why are you hiding?
422
00:19:30,712 --> 00:19:32,840
Because my mom says I have to go
423
00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:35,300
to North Carolina to see my dad.
424
00:19:35,884 --> 00:19:37,094
That sounds fun.
425
00:19:37,094 --> 00:19:40,722
I've never been to North Carolina.
What if I don't like it?
426
00:19:40,722 --> 00:19:43,559
Mm... Well,
427
00:19:43,559 --> 00:19:45,561
depending on which part, you might not.
428
00:19:45,561 --> 00:19:48,772
But, you know, doing something new
429
00:19:48,772 --> 00:19:51,567
is scary for everybody, not just you.
430
00:19:52,025 --> 00:19:55,946
Let me tell you a story about
taking chances. It's about Bessie...
431
00:19:56,655 --> 00:20:00,617
something.
She was the first Black female pilot
432
00:20:00,617 --> 00:20:02,411
to fly in the US.
433
00:20:03,453 --> 00:20:04,997
Or France.
434
00:20:05,706 --> 00:20:07,416
There was something about France.
435
00:20:07,416 --> 00:20:10,961
I wish I'd read the blurb,
but I got the gist. Anyway,
436
00:20:10,961 --> 00:20:12,629
imagine how she felt
437
00:20:12,629 --> 00:20:15,591
doing something new
for the first time,
438
00:20:15,591 --> 00:20:19,553
not knowing how they'd treat her
or if she'd make friends.
439
00:20:19,553 --> 00:20:21,638
And-- [grunts] Duck!
440
00:20:29,104 --> 00:20:30,731
Who was that man?
441
00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:34,860
Nobody. Absolutely nobody.
442
00:20:37,529 --> 00:20:38,530
You know what?
443
00:20:38,989 --> 00:20:40,991
Do you wanna see the display?
444
00:20:40,991 --> 00:20:43,035
And you'll have something fun
to tell your dad.
445
00:20:43,035 --> 00:20:44,369
- Deal?
- Okay.
446
00:20:44,953 --> 00:20:46,705
Alright. Let's get outta here.
447
00:20:50,584 --> 00:20:52,085
Oh, no!
448
00:20:52,085 --> 00:20:54,588
I forgot how to honk the horn!
449
00:20:54,588 --> 00:20:56,924
- Oh, I can do it.
- Okay.
450
00:20:56,924 --> 00:20:58,884
Ladies and gentlemen,
451
00:20:58,884 --> 00:21:01,053
the lockdown has been lifted.
452
00:21:01,053 --> 00:21:03,847
Thank you for your patience
as we work to get you to your destination.
453
00:21:03,847 --> 00:21:06,683
Where were you? You should've checked in.
I could've helped.
454
00:21:06,683 --> 00:21:09,561
Well, at least now you know I can
handle things when you're not around.
455
00:21:10,521 --> 00:21:11,939
Have fun in Atlanta.
456
00:21:19,429 --> 00:21:21,865
Those jackals picked
every bone clean up there.
457
00:21:21,865 --> 00:21:24,535
First rule of lockdown,
take what's yours, and fast.
458
00:21:24,535 --> 00:21:27,329
Okay. Good to know
you got survival skills.
459
00:21:27,329 --> 00:21:28,539
Ah!
- Ah-ah! Whoa.
460
00:21:29,623 --> 00:21:31,166
Talk about biting the hand that feeds you!
461
00:21:31,166 --> 00:21:32,543
Sorry, it's not you, I promise.
462
00:21:32,543 --> 00:21:34,044
- Wow.
- I grew up with five brothers,
463
00:21:34,044 --> 00:21:36,046
and my survival skill is not sharing food.
464
00:21:36,046 --> 00:21:38,257
Well, there'll be plenty enough
to go around on Thanksgiving.
465
00:21:38,257 --> 00:21:40,551
- No need to bare your fangs, babe.
- I will be on my best behavior.
466
00:21:40,551 --> 00:21:42,386
I'll even bake a pie.
467
00:21:45,430 --> 00:21:47,641
Well, my break is done.
468
00:21:47,641 --> 00:21:49,977
- I'll see you tonight.
- Mm-hmm.
469
00:21:49,977 --> 00:21:52,563
- Oh, and you owe me a foot rub.
- Yes, ma'am.
470
00:21:57,109 --> 00:21:58,110
Well, well, well.
471
00:21:58,652 --> 00:22:01,029
Melissa Action Jackson.
472
00:22:01,655 --> 00:22:03,448
How's it feel to be a hero?
473
00:22:03,448 --> 00:22:06,034
I don't really feel much like a hero.
474
00:22:06,034 --> 00:22:07,327
What's up?
475
00:22:08,370 --> 00:22:10,581
I'm really trying to change, Terrance,
476
00:22:10,581 --> 00:22:13,250
but I keep hitting wall
after wall after wall,
477
00:22:13,250 --> 00:22:16,003
and it's like I'm stuck.
478
00:22:17,462 --> 00:22:19,464
And I don't wanna give up, but--
479
00:22:20,507 --> 00:22:22,426
shit hurts.
480
00:22:22,426 --> 00:22:24,595
You sound like my Roomba.
481
00:22:24,595 --> 00:22:26,597
- Come again?
- Hear me out.
482
00:22:26,597 --> 00:22:30,142
When I first got it, I was like, "Yo,
this robot is about to change my life."
483
00:22:30,142 --> 00:22:33,187
- I'm about to change the channel.
- Stay with me, Jackson.
484
00:22:33,187 --> 00:22:36,023
So, for the first couple of days,
all the Roomba did was hit walls.
485
00:22:36,023 --> 00:22:38,233
- Mm.
- I thought the shit was broke.
486
00:22:38,233 --> 00:22:39,943
I was ready to send it back.
487
00:22:39,943 --> 00:22:42,571
Then I woke up one day,
and the shit was working.
488
00:22:43,030 --> 00:22:45,824
Turns out, the walls were information.
489
00:22:45,824 --> 00:22:48,368
Every wall was teaching it where to go
490
00:22:48,368 --> 00:22:49,953
and where not to.
491
00:22:52,748 --> 00:22:54,458
Okay, Yoda.
492
00:22:55,584 --> 00:22:58,128
Alright. I'm a Roomba.
493
00:22:58,128 --> 00:23:00,589
- Come on.
- Yay.
494
00:23:01,507 --> 00:23:03,133
[on radio] Patti for Mel.
495
00:23:03,133 --> 00:23:05,636
Pickup at B35.
496
00:23:05,636 --> 00:23:07,930
Roger that, on my way.
497
00:23:07,930 --> 00:23:10,224
I don't know why she's such a bitch.
498
00:23:10,224 --> 00:23:12,809
Uh, you're still pressing the talk button.
499
00:23:12,809 --> 00:23:15,020
I know.
500
00:23:15,687 --> 00:23:16,980
I gotta go.
501
00:23:17,523 --> 00:23:18,524
Oof!
502
00:23:18,524 --> 00:23:20,817
When you gonna give that up?
503
00:23:20,817 --> 00:23:23,237
Okay, one wall at a time.
504
00:23:23,237 --> 00:23:25,113
That's fair.
505
00:23:25,113 --> 00:23:26,448
Plus, if I quit, you'll figure out
506
00:23:26,448 --> 00:23:28,867
that the only reason why I come down here
is for your little metaphors.
507
00:23:28,867 --> 00:23:30,827
- I got a million of 'em.
- Ooh.
508
00:23:30,827 --> 00:23:32,913
And your chips.
509
00:23:34,122 --> 00:23:35,666
And crumbs.
510
00:23:36,542 --> 00:23:37,543
Mm, good.
511
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:52,724
No, I'm serious!
512
00:23:52,724 --> 00:23:55,477
We've all have thought about
having sex at work, right?
513
00:23:55,477 --> 00:23:57,563
Mm-hmm.
- I just didn't think I would do it
514
00:23:57,563 --> 00:23:59,565
- on top of or near charcuterie.
- Ew.
515
00:23:59,565 --> 00:24:02,901
- The sausage goes inside, not under.
- Thank you!
516
00:24:02,901 --> 00:24:05,237
As God is my witness, I am never, ever
517
00:24:05,237 --> 00:24:07,155
dating anyone at work again.
518
00:24:07,155 --> 00:24:08,740
Well, your boyfriend,
Jackie D's gon' fix it.
519
00:24:08,740 --> 00:24:11,243
Mm, he been helping me fix it all day.
Mm-hmm.
520
00:24:11,243 --> 00:24:12,661
Thank you.
521
00:24:12,661 --> 00:24:14,413
Alright, let's ruin this fruit man's life!
522
00:24:14,413 --> 00:24:17,875
I got his Facebook, LinkedIn,
and Venmo up. Let's do this.
523
00:24:17,875 --> 00:24:20,419
- No!
- Okay. Calm down!
524
00:24:20,419 --> 00:24:22,421
- I'm so ready.
- I know, I appreciate you,
525
00:24:22,421 --> 00:24:24,548
but karmically,
I ain't got no more cards to play.
526
00:24:24,548 --> 00:24:26,341
So, if you wanna help me,
527
00:24:26,341 --> 00:24:29,344
- you can update my HiveMind profile.
- Dassit?!
528
00:24:29,344 --> 00:24:32,890
- Yes!
- Look, I hit a wall today, but...
529
00:24:33,974 --> 00:24:35,184
I'ma keep going.
530
00:24:35,642 --> 00:24:37,686
- I'm proud of you.
- Aw, thank you.
531
00:24:37,686 --> 00:24:40,147
Uh, you have no full-body pics on this.
532
00:24:40,147 --> 00:24:43,358
Um, that's because they already know
what's on the outside of that.
533
00:24:43,358 --> 00:24:45,944
Alright, hold on,
I think I have something that will work.
534
00:24:45,944 --> 00:24:47,946
Okay, have you had sex at the bar?
535
00:24:49,323 --> 00:24:51,533
Okay, that was a long pause!
536
00:24:52,451 --> 00:24:54,494
I got it. My finest work.
537
00:24:54,494 --> 00:24:57,497
Mel, meet Mel 2.0.
538
00:24:59,458 --> 00:25:00,584
Wow.
539
00:25:01,126 --> 00:25:03,337
Okay, legs. I'm stealing that top.
540
00:25:04,046 --> 00:25:07,007
Wow. Alright, let's put
this picture to work y'all.
541
00:25:10,427 --> 00:25:11,929
Here we go.
Nope.
542
00:25:11,929 --> 00:25:14,223
He's cute.
He's 24!
543
00:25:14,223 --> 00:25:16,183
Not with the teeny-weeny beanie.
What? Ew!
544
00:25:16,183 --> 00:25:18,727
Get away from the life coaches.
That's just drug dealers.
545
00:25:18,727 --> 00:25:20,812
Okay, if he has that many scarves,
he don't need me.
546
00:25:20,812 --> 00:25:22,439
- No, no, no, that's a life coach.
- Okay. No,
547
00:25:22,439 --> 00:25:23,941
the fish, if he was cooking it.
548
00:25:23,941 --> 00:25:26,151
Oh. He's got soulful eyes.
He's cute. Mm.
549
00:25:27,694 --> 00:25:30,155
♪ There's no way to forget it all ♪
550
00:25:30,155 --> 00:25:32,199
It's my brother.
551
00:25:32,199 --> 00:25:34,826
Why is that so funny?
552
00:25:35,994 --> 00:25:37,496
He's married.
553
00:25:37,496 --> 00:25:40,415
♪ I'm not trying to make you cry ♪
554
00:25:51,051 --> 00:25:53,679
♪ I don't believe it ♪
555
00:25:53,679 --> 00:25:56,890
♪ You don't believe in me ♪
556
00:25:56,890 --> 00:26:00,811
♪ So, how could you make me cry? ♪
557
00:26:02,688 --> 00:26:05,190
♪There's no way to forget it all ♪
558
00:26:05,190 --> 00:26:07,776
♪ I don't know why ♪
559
00:26:07,776 --> 00:26:11,613
♪ But I'm not trying to make you cry ♪
560
00:26:13,323 --> 00:26:15,325
♪ Five seconds in your heart ♪
561
00:26:16,034 --> 00:26:18,036
♪ Straight to the heart ♪
562
00:26:18,579 --> 00:26:20,622
♪ I can't get to your heart ♪