1
00:00:23,496 --> 00:00:28,071
[ Photographers shouting ]

2
00:00:28,071 --> 00:00:32,546
♫♫

3
00:00:32,546 --> 00:00:36,650
-The power of Hollywood
and that profession

4
00:00:36,650 --> 00:00:39,683
really undid me at times.

5
00:00:41,555 --> 00:00:45,158
They always had to knock me down
for something,

6
00:00:45,158 --> 00:00:47,661
but then they always went,
"But she´s beautiful."

7
00:00:49,162 --> 00:00:50,493
It wasn´t about me.

8
00:00:50,493 --> 00:00:52,726
It´s just a projection on me,

9
00:00:52,726 --> 00:00:55,629
what they wanted to hear and
what they wanted to make of it.

10
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-If you look at the structure
of the media industries,

11
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most of the people who call
the shots tend to be men.

12
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They tend to be
straight, white men.

13
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It´s very much
about a gender binary.

14
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It´s very much about
what women need to do

15
00:01:07,811 --> 00:01:11,184
in order to be desirable
to straight men.

16
00:01:11,184 --> 00:01:12,716
-Gatekeeping is a major way

17
00:01:12,716 --> 00:01:14,788
of how we keep girls
under control.

18
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It is dependent upon girls
not having desires of their own.

19
00:01:21,294 --> 00:01:24,427
-It´s just so interesting
how I accepted it for so long.

20
00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:30,604
I was struggling
to find my own voice.

21
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I said, "Yeah, Mom,
I have to go do this on my own.

22
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If I´m going to fail,
I have to fail in my own."

23
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♫♫

24
00:01:42,846 --> 00:01:48,682
♫♫

25
00:01:48,682 --> 00:01:50,453
-Now, tell me about the book
you´re writing.

26
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You told me
you´re writing a book.

27
00:01:52,185 --> 00:01:54,527
-It´s not quite
an autobiography or memoirs

28
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´cause I haven´t been
around that long.

29
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But it´s basically about

30
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all the different parts
of my life --

31
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you know, going to school.

32
00:02:01,765 --> 00:02:03,366
Since I´ve just finished
my first year...

33
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A publisher contacted
my mom and said,

34
00:02:05,498 --> 00:02:06,940
"We want you to write a book."

35
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And I was like,
"I am ready to write a book."

36
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They said, "Well, you know,
it´s a guide

37
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to other young people
going away to college."

38
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And I was like,
"I´ve got this."

39
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Had my whole plan.

40
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And it started with the fear
of not getting in,

41
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getting in, missing my mom,
being alone for the first time,

42
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feeling pressured
about everything,

43
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whether it was drugs
or sex or drinking.

44
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You know,
how do you become independent?

45
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I was really proud of it.

46
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And they said,
"Well, we´re thinking

47
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about this book differently."

48
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They wrote what they wanted
as the first chapter,

49
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and I kid you not,

50
00:02:49,783 --> 00:02:52,285
it was like,
"I like leg warmers.

51
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Being away from home,
there´s a lot of ways

52
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you can eat different foods.

53
00:02:56,820 --> 00:02:58,451
You can have a sundae
at midnight.

54
00:02:58,451 --> 00:03:01,294
You can have a,
you know, pizza."

55
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It was so inane.

56
00:03:02,696 --> 00:03:05,528
It had nothing to do

57
00:03:05,528 --> 00:03:08,862
with the gut-wrenching
feeling that I had

58
00:03:08,862 --> 00:03:11,935
by going away to college.

59
00:03:11,935 --> 00:03:14,808
You know, they just wanted
their narrative.

60
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So I said,
"Make the book that you want."

61
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And then when the book came out,

62
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I thought,
just go along with it.

63
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I think that I --
I don´t really know what I am

64
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and who I want to be yet,
and this book

65
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is the beginning of that
learning what I want to be.

66
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The most personal and in depth
that it got

67
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was the chapter on virginity,

68
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which was actually
my mom´s idea.

69
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I mean, I brought it up.

70
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I´m not ashamed of it.
I really wasn´t.

71
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But I thought,
well, you know, it´s true.

72
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If I can help anybody
not feel pressured...

73
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Same thing I tell my daughter.

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Like, you don´t have to do
something

75
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just because they want it.

76
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Like, no.

77
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Your body.
You don´t have to do it.

78
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That was the approach I took.

79
00:04:03,717 --> 00:04:07,020
Unless you go out there
and say it,

80
00:04:07,020 --> 00:04:10,363
you know, you´re not gonna
get your truth, really.

81
00:04:10,363 --> 00:04:13,597
I think there´s a great deal
of pressure on young girls,

82
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young women, especially my age,
and nobody should do anything

83
00:04:18,071 --> 00:04:20,373
that they don´t feel
comfortable about doing.

84
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You know, why all of a sudden
does that mean

85
00:04:22,075 --> 00:04:24,778
you´re boring
or you´re too squeaky clean

86
00:04:24,778 --> 00:04:27,380
or, you know,
you´re a nerd or whatever?

87
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It´s like, no, you actually
have ownership

88
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over your health and your body.

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That, to me was empowering.

90
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But it was
the admission of virginity

91
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that was really the first time,
you know, they pulled that out,

92
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which is, I guess,
better than pulling out,

93
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"I like leg warmers."
[ Laughs ]

94
00:04:43,326 --> 00:04:45,929
-You talk about something
very personal in your book,

95
00:04:45,929 --> 00:04:47,561
and it´s really
nobody´s business,

96
00:04:47,561 --> 00:04:50,063
but you talk about it,
that at 20 years old,

97
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you´re a virgin,
and you give tips in there,

98
00:04:52,766 --> 00:04:54,738
in that sense,
how to remain a virgin.

99
00:04:54,738 --> 00:04:58,371
-You feel strongly about
maintaining your virginity.

100
00:04:58,371 --> 00:04:59,643
-[ Laughing ] I knew
it was gonna come to that.

101
00:04:59,643 --> 00:05:01,074
That´s how it´s gonna go.
Here it comes!

102
00:05:01,074 --> 00:05:03,076
You never know what people
are going to just attack

103
00:05:03,076 --> 00:05:05,679
or want to know about,
and I was a bit surprised

104
00:05:05,679 --> 00:05:08,481
because there wasn´t even
a whole chapter devoted to it.

105
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-Like a page, right?
-Just a page.

106
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A little page,
a little sentence.

107
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"I am."

108
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-Her name even sounds like
anti-sexual device.

109
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[ Laughter ]

110
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"Did you have fun on your date?"

111
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"No, she was wearing
her Brooke Shield."

112
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[ Laughter and applause ]

113
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-I certainly remember

114
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that microscopic obsession
with Brooke´s virginity.

115
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With all the things
going on in the world,

116
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I just remember thinking,
why is this such a big deal?

117
00:05:36,780 --> 00:05:39,613
-The Soviet Union has suffered
one of the worst disasters

118
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in the history of nuclear power.

119
00:05:41,114 --> 00:05:43,817
-I have to get not nasty,
but I have to get personal,

120
00:05:43,817 --> 00:05:45,458
ask you
the virginity question.

121
00:05:45,458 --> 00:05:48,722
-I´m a little puzzled about
how these weapons

122
00:05:48,722 --> 00:05:51,925
got to the military in Iran.

123
00:05:51,925 --> 00:05:53,827
-The West Berliners
were determined.

124
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The chant went up,
"Down with the wall."

125
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-Brooke says
she wants to remain a virgin

126
00:05:57,831 --> 00:05:59,603
until she finds
someone she loves.

127
00:05:59,603 --> 00:06:02,976
-Ethiopia´s
7 1/2 million famine victims.

128
00:06:02,976 --> 00:06:05,839
-When it comes to drugs
and alcohol,

129
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just say no.

130
00:06:07,881 --> 00:06:11,585
-1980s America --
there was a whole movement

131
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of "just say no" and abstinence.

132
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And I think Brooke became

133
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an unwitting tool, or pawn,
of that,

134
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the Virgin vessel for America.

135
00:06:22,756 --> 00:06:27,831
People wanted to reclaim
the pureness of Brooke

136
00:06:27,831 --> 00:06:29,462
in a way that I just thought,

137
00:06:29,462 --> 00:06:32,005
wow, that puts so much pressure
on somebody.

138
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-She´s like a role model.
Yeah, she´s got good morals.

139
00:06:34,207 --> 00:06:36,870
She´s, um -- I don´t know.

140
00:06:36,870 --> 00:06:39,542
She´s just a good person inside.
It come through in her eyes.

141
00:06:39,542 --> 00:06:42,846
-She feels like she´s
more innocent

142
00:06:42,846 --> 00:06:46,580
than other girls, you know?

143
00:06:46,580 --> 00:06:47,821
-I wasn´t a hypocrite.

144
00:06:47,821 --> 00:06:49,182
I wasn´t doing
any of this stuff.

145
00:06:49,182 --> 00:06:52,085
But there was
a huge responsibility

146
00:06:52,085 --> 00:06:56,930
to be the representative
of that whole era.

147
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And that was just
sort of placed on me.

148
00:07:02,465 --> 00:07:04,938
-She can´t live
in the space in between,

149
00:07:04,938 --> 00:07:07,941
because people don´t know
what to do with that.

150
00:07:07,941 --> 00:07:11,545
Either you´re a virgin
and you´re a prude,

151
00:07:11,545 --> 00:07:15,779
or you´re a slut
and you´re doing too much.

152
00:07:15,779 --> 00:07:18,982
There´s no third option where
maybe you´re both,

153
00:07:18,982 --> 00:07:20,814
or neither, even.

154
00:07:20,814 --> 00:07:22,686
You have to have
one or the other.

155
00:07:22,686 --> 00:07:24,618
And so all that
is still present.

156
00:07:24,618 --> 00:07:26,690
I don´t see how any of that
has changed [laughs]

157
00:07:26,690 --> 00:07:28,061
in the last 40 years.

158
00:07:28,061 --> 00:07:30,824
-I think that girls
and young women today

159
00:07:30,824 --> 00:07:33,066
are in really
an impossible double bind,

160
00:07:33,066 --> 00:07:34,828
you know, where they´re told

161
00:07:34,828 --> 00:07:36,970
that they need
to express themselves

162
00:07:36,970 --> 00:07:39,633
and present themselves
in very sexualized ways,

163
00:07:39,633 --> 00:07:42,005
but then they´re blamed
for anything that happens.

164
00:07:42,005 --> 00:07:45,038
-I honestly have been
just so surprised

165
00:07:45,038 --> 00:07:49,212
at how entrenched this is <i>still.</i>

166
00:07:49,212 --> 00:07:51,715
Brooke´s experience
and the ways in which

167
00:07:51,715 --> 00:07:54,287
she had to be in the world --

168
00:07:54,287 --> 00:07:58,291
none of those roles included
her own desire

169
00:07:58,291 --> 00:08:01,054
as a sexual person with agency,

170
00:08:01,054 --> 00:08:03,597
with subjectivity.

171
00:08:03,597 --> 00:08:06,860
-It was always the men
that would say something,

172
00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:09,232
and you knew
that it somehow trigger

173
00:08:09,232 --> 00:08:11,164
something in them as well.

174
00:08:11,164 --> 00:08:13,036
-How do you think
people perceive you?

175
00:08:13,036 --> 00:08:14,608
Are you a goody-goody?

176
00:08:14,608 --> 00:08:16,870
-I don´t -- no.
I don´t think I am.

177
00:08:16,870 --> 00:08:18,942
-Are you dating anybody?
What´s the...

178
00:08:18,942 --> 00:08:20,313
-No, I´m not actually.
[ Chuckles ]

179
00:08:20,313 --> 00:08:22,015
-Everybody,
every time I say that --

180
00:08:22,015 --> 00:08:23,877
-That what I want to know.
-[ Laughs ]

181
00:08:23,877 --> 00:08:29,152
-I think that it was a relief
that she actually was a virgin

182
00:08:29,152 --> 00:08:32,756
because that meant
that the terrible transgressions

183
00:08:32,756 --> 00:08:35,859
of the earlier movies --
oh, they weren´t really true.

184
00:08:35,859 --> 00:08:38,792
-Everybody wanted to untap this,
you know --

185
00:08:38,792 --> 00:08:40,964
this well that was just
gonna spring forth.

186
00:08:40,964 --> 00:08:43,767
You know, all these things
were just swirling around.

187
00:08:43,767 --> 00:08:46,139
Everybody was trying to...

188
00:08:46,139 --> 00:08:49,673
hook me up with
the most eligible bachelor.

189
00:08:49,673 --> 00:08:51,805
♫ What do I think about men? ♫

190
00:08:51,805 --> 00:08:54,778
♫ Oh, men are dreamy,
men are sweet ♫

191
00:08:54,778 --> 00:08:56,179
♫ They´re really knock me
off my feet ♫

192
00:08:56,179 --> 00:08:58,351
-She lived most of her life
in public, and,

193
00:08:58,351 --> 00:09:01,985
"Oh, my God. Who is
Brooke Shields dating now?"

194
00:09:01,985 --> 00:09:05,288
<i>-♫ Men, men, men, men ♫</i>

195
00:09:05,288 --> 00:09:06,960
-It´s hard enough
being a teenager

196
00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:09,322
without having <i>that</i> pressure.

197
00:09:09,322 --> 00:09:12,696
It was brutal and the media
was just cranking up.

198
00:09:12,696 --> 00:09:14,868
And now we´re
getting opinions and --

199
00:09:14,868 --> 00:09:18,932
and, of course, she was standing
next to the Mr. Media himself,

200
00:09:18,932 --> 00:09:20,834
Michael Jackson.

201
00:09:20,834 --> 00:09:22,736
-You have a crush
on Michael Jackson.

202
00:09:22,736 --> 00:09:24,337
-Michael Jackson and you.
-Yes.

203
00:09:24,337 --> 00:09:26,940
-Are you just friends or has
there been a romance there?

204
00:09:26,940 --> 00:09:29,212
-The world was going back
and forth on whether or not

205
00:09:29,212 --> 00:09:32,085
Brooke was dating
Michael Jackson or not dating.

206
00:09:32,085 --> 00:09:35,088
And, you know.

207
00:09:35,088 --> 00:09:37,320
my mother had opinions
about that.

208
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,693
[ Laughs ]

209
00:09:39,693 --> 00:09:44,958
It was that whole thing
of Brooke being privileged

210
00:09:44,958 --> 00:09:46,730
and also being white

211
00:09:46,730 --> 00:09:51,965
and also stepping into
the inner sanctum of Blackness

212
00:09:51,965 --> 00:09:53,807
because of Michael Jackson.

213
00:09:53,807 --> 00:09:57,110
[ Crowd shouting and cheering ]

214
00:09:57,110 --> 00:10:00,243
-It was such a huge topic
of conversation

215
00:10:00,243 --> 00:10:02,646
in the Black community.

216
00:10:02,646 --> 00:10:04,277
-Man, white people going,

217
00:10:04,277 --> 00:10:06,980
[nasally voice] "That Michael´s
a special kind of guy.

218
00:10:06,980 --> 00:10:09,282
He´s special.

219
00:10:09,282 --> 00:10:11,384
I mean, he´s good,
clean, and wholesome."

220
00:10:11,384 --> 00:10:13,256
Y´all believe it. You know how
I know y´all believed it?

221
00:10:13,256 --> 00:10:15,058
Y´all didn´t get mad
when he took Brooke Shields

222
00:10:15,058 --> 00:10:17,060
to the Grammys.

223
00:10:17,060 --> 00:10:19,663
Nobody white said shit.

224
00:10:19,663 --> 00:10:23,997
And Brooke Shields is
the whitest woman in America.

225
00:10:23,997 --> 00:10:25,438
That´s Miss America every year
is Brooke --

226
00:10:25,438 --> 00:10:27,140
fuck who you see with the crown.

227
00:10:27,140 --> 00:10:28,441
Brooke -- you look up
white woman in dictionary,

228
00:10:28,441 --> 00:10:30,043
it´ll be a picture of Brooke
like this.

229
00:10:30,043 --> 00:10:32,305
[ Laughter and applause ]

230
00:10:32,305 --> 00:10:34,708
-We met when I was 13,

231
00:10:34,708 --> 00:10:39,883
and we, like, hung out.

232
00:10:39,883 --> 00:10:43,156
It was <i>very</i> childlike.

233
00:10:43,156 --> 00:10:45,388
And we´d just laugh

234
00:10:45,388 --> 00:10:48,021
and kind of the ridiculousness
of being in the car

235
00:10:48,021 --> 00:10:51,364
and having people rock the car
and be insane and...

236
00:10:51,364 --> 00:10:54,868
[ Crowd shouting "Michael!" ]

237
00:10:54,868 --> 00:10:58,131
...we both were

238
00:10:58,131 --> 00:11:01,334
quite juvenile in some ways

239
00:11:01,334 --> 00:11:05,909
and quite mature
and experienced in others.

240
00:11:05,909 --> 00:11:09,312
So we were just really friends.

241
00:11:09,312 --> 00:11:13,817
But he always wanted
to be sort of seen with me.

242
00:11:13,817 --> 00:11:17,450
Like, if we would
pick a restaurant,

243
00:11:17,450 --> 00:11:20,153
I was like, "Well, how did
they know we were here?"

244
00:11:20,153 --> 00:11:23,927
-Um, hello, Brooke.
I´m working on my album.

245
00:11:23,927 --> 00:11:26,159
I just wanted to say hello

246
00:11:26,159 --> 00:11:29,002
and I hope
I get to see you soon.

247
00:11:29,002 --> 00:11:31,064
Just a brief message on video.

248
00:11:31,064 --> 00:11:32,435
Goodbye.

249
00:11:32,435 --> 00:11:36,069
-And then at one point he said

250
00:11:36,069 --> 00:11:38,041
"We should adopt a child.

251
00:11:38,041 --> 00:11:41,474
We should adopt a child
and raise a child together."

252
00:11:41,474 --> 00:11:43,046
-Who do you date?

253
00:11:43,046 --> 00:11:46,079
-Well, right now
it´s Brooke Shields.

254
00:11:46,079 --> 00:11:47,380
-Mm-hmm.

255
00:11:47,380 --> 00:11:49,222
-That´s -- I don´t --
Well, we try not

256
00:11:49,222 --> 00:11:51,054
to just be everywhere
and go everywhere...

257
00:11:51,054 --> 00:11:54,988
-I called them and I said,
"What are you doing?"

258
00:11:54,988 --> 00:11:57,360
I said,
"I´m actually currently

259
00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:59,933
with a boyfriend
in New York City.

260
00:11:59,933 --> 00:12:01,364
What are you doing?"

261
00:12:01,364 --> 00:12:02,966
-And she´ll come over,
I´ll go to her house,

262
00:12:02,966 --> 00:12:04,467
´cause I don´t like going out
into public.

263
00:12:04,467 --> 00:12:08,872
-And eventually I sort of
lost touch with him.

264
00:12:08,872 --> 00:12:11,044
-Is there anybody special
in Brooke Shields´ life

265
00:12:11,044 --> 00:12:12,445
at the moment?

266
00:12:12,445 --> 00:12:14,107
-Actually, there is.
And he´s with me today.

267
00:12:14,107 --> 00:12:16,109
-Well, that´s great.
I mean, is he real special?

268
00:12:16,109 --> 00:12:18,381
-He´s real special, yeah.
-Is he right over there?

269
00:12:18,381 --> 00:12:20,153
-Yeah, come here.
[ Laughs ]

270
00:12:20,153 --> 00:12:21,254
Just say hi
to everybody.

271
00:12:21,254 --> 00:12:22,485
-Hi, everybody.

272
00:12:22,485 --> 00:12:23,957
-Well, why don´t you
introduce him?

273
00:12:23,957 --> 00:12:25,559
-His name´s Dean Cain.
He´s, um --

274
00:12:25,559 --> 00:12:27,320
He goes to Princeton.

275
00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:29,392
-I wanted to jump into
the personal relationship

276
00:12:29,392 --> 00:12:32,395
and the love and the commitment.

277
00:12:32,395 --> 00:12:34,327
You know, the part
he was more comfortable with

278
00:12:34,327 --> 00:12:37,400
is probably the sexual part,
and I wasn´t.

279
00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:41,134
So we had to teach each other
about the other.

280
00:12:41,134 --> 00:12:46,109
You know, he was the first
person I trusted with all of it.

281
00:12:46,109 --> 00:12:51,915
But I never celebrated
our attraction to each other.

282
00:12:51,915 --> 00:12:58,351
I never reveled
in the sexual relationship

283
00:12:58,351 --> 00:12:59,923
between the two of us.

284
00:12:59,923 --> 00:13:02,896
I mean, I had built up
so much around this.

285
00:13:02,896 --> 00:13:06,159
The stakes were
so unnaturally high

286
00:13:06,159 --> 00:13:11,534
that I´m surprised he even
went through with any of it.

287
00:13:11,534 --> 00:13:14,337
When we finally had sex...

288
00:13:14,337 --> 00:13:16,169
[ Chuckles ]

289
00:13:16,169 --> 00:13:18,572
...I immediately

290
00:13:18,572 --> 00:13:22,345
ran out of the room,
ran down the hall,

291
00:13:22,345 --> 00:13:25,579
butt-naked,
[laughs] just running.

292
00:13:25,579 --> 00:13:28,181
I didn´t know where
it was going.

293
00:13:28,181 --> 00:13:34,257
[ Laughing ] And he ran after me
with the duvet

294
00:13:34,257 --> 00:13:36,089
and grabbed a hold of me
and said,

295
00:13:36,089 --> 00:13:38,431
"Where are you going?"

296
00:13:38,431 --> 00:13:40,063
He goes,
"I´m not going anywhere.

297
00:13:40,063 --> 00:13:44,067
I´m not leaving you.
You´re the same person."

298
00:13:44,067 --> 00:13:47,370
He got it instantly,
and I just cried.

299
00:13:49,573 --> 00:13:52,145
Well, I feel bad
for that girl, you know.

300
00:13:52,145 --> 00:13:55,478
She was old enough
to own her own body for real

301
00:13:55,478 --> 00:13:58,612
and, you know, just...

302
00:13:58,612 --> 00:14:01,915
and just couldn´t get there
at that moment, you know?

303
00:14:05,258 --> 00:14:08,021
What it boils down to

304
00:14:08,021 --> 00:14:12,566
is sort of a regret
for lost exploration

305
00:14:12,566 --> 00:14:18,331
and opportunity to understand
my personal sexuality.

306
00:14:26,009 --> 00:14:28,982
-Brains you´re born with.

307
00:14:28,982 --> 00:14:31,685
A great body you have to work at
every day.

308
00:14:31,685 --> 00:14:34,117
You have to stretch it
to the limit.

309
00:14:34,117 --> 00:14:35,649
I thought I was gonna graduate

310
00:14:35,649 --> 00:14:38,521
and I was gonna go right back
into a movie a year,

311
00:14:38,521 --> 00:14:42,596
and I thought, yeah, it was just
going to be great, you know?

312
00:14:42,596 --> 00:14:45,358
And it was just like,
"I´m sorry, I´m sorry.

313
00:14:45,358 --> 00:14:47,030
Um, Brooke with an ´e´?"

314
00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:49,302
So get smart.
Join Rockford Health Club today

315
00:14:49,302 --> 00:14:50,964
and get 50% off dues.

316
00:14:50,964 --> 00:14:53,967
I went into college very famous.

317
00:14:53,967 --> 00:14:56,339
Hadn´t done a movie
in a really long time.

318
00:14:56,339 --> 00:14:59,542
I didn´t assume it would be
a detriment to my career.

319
00:14:59,542 --> 00:15:01,645
-Don´t mind me asking,
but why --

320
00:15:01,645 --> 00:15:03,647
I mean, your work --
I mean, what do you, uh --

321
00:15:03,647 --> 00:15:05,218
-After four years
of Princeton,

322
00:15:05,218 --> 00:15:08,351
my professor suggested
I seek higher goals.

323
00:15:08,351 --> 00:15:10,624
-Now, you did drop out for
about four years, didn´t you?

324
00:15:10,624 --> 00:15:12,225
-I did.
Actually, I --

325
00:15:12,225 --> 00:15:14,558
I almost didn´t even think of it
as dropping out.

326
00:15:14,558 --> 00:15:16,590
What I --
I went to college and...

327
00:15:16,590 --> 00:15:18,692
It wasn´t like Paramount was
waiting for me

328
00:15:18,692 --> 00:15:22,065
and calling for me,
and Columbia wasn´t going,

329
00:15:22,065 --> 00:15:23,236
"Well, we have to have Brooke."

330
00:15:23,236 --> 00:15:25,198
You know, at that point,
there was

331
00:15:25,198 --> 00:15:27,440
so many other actresses
that had come

332
00:15:27,440 --> 00:15:29,502
just in those four years.

333
00:15:29,502 --> 00:15:32,145
And so my mom and I were like,

334
00:15:32,145 --> 00:15:35,448
"Well, we better get a movie
in this period of time

335
00:15:35,448 --> 00:15:38,612
so it comes out
when you graduate."

336
00:15:38,612 --> 00:15:42,756
And it just sort of flopped.

337
00:15:42,756 --> 00:15:44,758
[ Indistinct shouting
in distance ]

338
00:15:46,189 --> 00:15:49,392
So, okay, let´s try to find
things, like find commercials.

339
00:15:49,392 --> 00:15:52,065
Go do a commercial in Japan,
you know?

340
00:15:52,065 --> 00:15:54,467
[ Upbeat music playing ]

341
00:15:54,467 --> 00:16:00,734
♫♫

342
00:16:00,734 --> 00:16:04,437
The hair dryers and stuff --
they´ll do something with you.

343
00:16:04,437 --> 00:16:07,540
We have a filter that is
removable and you can clean it,

344
00:16:07,540 --> 00:16:10,614
which increases the longevity
of a product.

345
00:16:10,614 --> 00:16:14,147
Arrid fights wetness ordinary
deodorant sticks can´t.

346
00:16:14,147 --> 00:16:15,589
[ Man speaks Japanese ]

347
00:16:15,589 --> 00:16:17,420
It moves me!

348
00:16:17,420 --> 00:16:19,222
[ Man speaks Japanese ]

349
00:16:19,222 --> 00:16:22,556
What if I told you
Forever Sheer pantyhose

350
00:16:22,556 --> 00:16:25,629
come in great shades
for daytime, like these?

351
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:29,432
Mmm.

352
00:16:29,432 --> 00:16:31,665
Satisfying.

353
00:16:31,665 --> 00:16:33,506
And it´s healthy for you, too.

354
00:16:36,670 --> 00:16:39,142
-She knows that she´s gotta
keep trying things.

355
00:16:39,142 --> 00:16:42,175
Like, "How am I going to
get out there again?

356
00:16:42,175 --> 00:16:43,577
Or what do I need to do?"

357
00:16:43,577 --> 00:16:46,179
When you´re in the public eye,
there´s pressure.

358
00:16:46,179 --> 00:16:48,481
-Could you put
into words now what you hope

359
00:16:48,481 --> 00:16:50,323
To do with your career
at this point?

360
00:16:50,323 --> 00:16:52,325
-Does it ever worry that
you may have peaked already,

361
00:16:52,325 --> 00:16:54,227
that you´ve already had
the best of your career?

362
00:16:54,227 --> 00:16:56,289
-Do you think Hollywood
takes you seriously?

363
00:16:56,289 --> 00:16:59,362
-I think that Hollywood,

364
00:16:59,362 --> 00:17:02,365
or the entertainment industry,

365
00:17:02,365 --> 00:17:06,800
hasn´t seen my potential yet
as an actress.

366
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:10,574
Creatively,
now I´m in much more pain,

367
00:17:10,574 --> 00:17:13,506
in a way, artistic pain,
if I can be so sort of

368
00:17:13,506 --> 00:17:15,178
pretentious about it.

369
00:17:15,178 --> 00:17:21,354
It was a really scary,
rough period of rejection.

370
00:17:21,354 --> 00:17:24,588
And to kind of go that high
that fast

371
00:17:24,588 --> 00:17:27,220
and then just nothing --

372
00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:31,394
it was so difficult
on so many levels.

373
00:17:31,394 --> 00:17:35,599
And I kept thinking I might

374
00:17:35,599 --> 00:17:38,301
get approval of some kind

375
00:17:38,301 --> 00:17:43,106
in a world that I dreamt about
my whole life.

376
00:17:46,339 --> 00:17:48,642
I let myself be vulnerable.

377
00:17:48,642 --> 00:17:50,784
And this is the first time

378
00:17:50,784 --> 00:17:53,246
I´ve ever spoken
about what happened.

379
00:17:56,389 --> 00:17:58,652
I had heard that there was
a movie being made

380
00:17:58,652 --> 00:18:01,254
and I was in consideration,

381
00:18:01,254 --> 00:18:04,728
and it was the first
since college

382
00:18:04,728 --> 00:18:08,832
that any interest
was sort of expressed.

383
00:18:08,832 --> 00:18:13,667
We had a dinner, and I thought
it was a work meeting.

384
00:18:13,667 --> 00:18:15,669
I had met this person before

385
00:18:15,669 --> 00:18:21,244
and was always --
he was always nice to me.

386
00:18:21,244 --> 00:18:24,578
But then the person´s behavior
was changing,

387
00:18:24,578 --> 00:18:26,580
and I was like, oh, nobody --

388
00:18:26,580 --> 00:18:28,421
there was no talk
about the movie.

389
00:18:28,421 --> 00:18:29,853
No talk about a part
in the movie.

390
00:18:29,853 --> 00:18:31,454
No talk about anything.

391
00:18:31,454 --> 00:18:33,226
And I was like,
"I don´t think that was it.

392
00:18:33,226 --> 00:18:34,828
I don´t understand,"
and so I said,

393
00:18:34,828 --> 00:18:36,429
"Oh, I have to get a cab."

394
00:18:36,429 --> 00:18:39,563
And so he said,
"Come back to the hotel

395
00:18:39,563 --> 00:18:42,636
and I´ll call a cab."

396
00:18:42,636 --> 00:18:47,601
And I go up to the hotel room
and he disappears for a while.

397
00:18:47,601 --> 00:18:50,173
I don´t want to go over to the
phone because it´s not my phone.

398
00:18:50,173 --> 00:18:52,305
I don´t want to sit down
´cause I´m not staying.

399
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:54,748
And so I thought,
Ah, I´m gonna use the binoculars

400
00:18:54,748 --> 00:18:56,710
and bide my time,
so I look at the binoculars.

401
00:18:56,710 --> 00:18:58,682
I watch the volleyball players.

402
00:18:58,682 --> 00:19:00,914
And the door opens.

403
00:19:00,914 --> 00:19:05,659
The person comes out naked,

404
00:19:05,659 --> 00:19:09,322
and I´ve got the binoculars.

405
00:19:09,322 --> 00:19:11,765
And I´m like, "Shit!"

406
00:19:11,765 --> 00:19:15,198
And I put the binoculars down.
He was right on me.

407
00:19:15,198 --> 00:19:18,301
It was a --
this, like, wrestle --

408
00:19:18,301 --> 00:19:19,803
this, like, was wrestling.

409
00:19:19,803 --> 00:19:22,335
You know, I didn´t want to.
I was afraid I´d...

410
00:19:22,335 --> 00:19:24,678
get choked out or something or,
like, I didn´t --

411
00:19:24,678 --> 00:19:26,640
you know, I didn´t know.

412
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:30,213
You know, I played the scene
out in my head, you know,

413
00:19:30,213 --> 00:19:33,346
the run away and the pull back
and the beat the shit out of.

414
00:19:33,346 --> 00:19:37,290
And I was just like,
"Oh! No.

415
00:19:37,290 --> 00:19:38,952
Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope."

416
00:19:38,952 --> 00:19:43,897
♫♫

417
00:19:43,897 --> 00:19:47,901
So I didn´t fight that much.

418
00:19:47,901 --> 00:19:50,463
I didn´t.

419
00:19:50,463 --> 00:19:54,307
I just absolutely froze.

420
00:19:54,307 --> 00:19:58,371
I thought my one "no"
should have been enough.

421
00:19:58,371 --> 00:20:03,346
And I just thought,
stay alive and get out.

422
00:20:03,346 --> 00:20:08,351
And I...just, "voomp,"
just shut it out.

423
00:20:10,383 --> 00:20:15,258
And God knows I knew how to be
disassociated from my body.

424
00:20:15,258 --> 00:20:16,790
I had practiced that.

425
00:20:18,531 --> 00:20:21,635
And then the next thing is
the door´s open

426
00:20:21,635 --> 00:20:25,669
and the person says,
"Well, I´ll see you around."

427
00:20:25,669 --> 00:20:28,471
No clothes on.
And I was like...

428
00:20:28,471 --> 00:20:30,273
And I just said, "Yeah."

429
00:20:30,273 --> 00:20:32,546
And I walked out
and I went down in the elevator

430
00:20:32,546 --> 00:20:36,810
and I just got my own cab.

431
00:20:36,810 --> 00:20:40,483
And I just I cried all the way
to my friend´s apartment

432
00:20:40,483 --> 00:20:45,759
and I, you know,
went to Gavin and told Gavin,

433
00:20:45,759 --> 00:20:50,023
and he said, "That´s rape."

434
00:20:50,023 --> 00:20:54,527
And I said,
"I´m not willing to...

435
00:20:54,527 --> 00:20:56,399
believe that."

436
00:21:00,604 --> 00:21:02,475
-Well, I was on the phone
the first time,

437
00:21:02,475 --> 00:21:05,438
but then we talked about it
again in person.

438
00:21:05,438 --> 00:21:07,310
How I felt was...

439
00:21:09,442 --> 00:21:12,916
...literally physical pain
in my stomach.

440
00:21:12,916 --> 00:21:16,349
I had...

441
00:21:16,349 --> 00:21:20,523
invested so much of my life in

442
00:21:20,523 --> 00:21:25,759
literally protecting Brooke,
and then...

443
00:21:25,759 --> 00:21:31,004
loving her as I do,
I was...

444
00:21:31,004 --> 00:21:35,468
angry to hear her story.

445
00:21:35,468 --> 00:21:38,642
I was very, very sad.

446
00:21:38,642 --> 00:21:41,114
I´m very, very sad about it now.

447
00:21:41,114 --> 00:21:44,517
You know,
that´s my little sister.

448
00:21:44,517 --> 00:21:46,750
[ Chuckles and clears throat ]

449
00:21:46,750 --> 00:21:50,353
And I wanted her to know
she didn´t do anything wrong.

450
00:21:52,085 --> 00:21:55,829
And I hope she does now.
I think she does.

451
00:21:55,829 --> 00:21:58,031
[ Sniffles ]

452
00:22:00,033 --> 00:22:02,866
-The thing that I think
I´m the most...

453
00:22:04,838 --> 00:22:07,971
...ashamed of or, you know,
whatever it is,

454
00:22:07,971 --> 00:22:12,576
is that there was
part of me that felt,

455
00:22:12,576 --> 00:22:13,877
"Cool."

456
00:22:13,877 --> 00:22:14,948
-Oh, God, Brooke.

457
00:22:14,948 --> 00:22:16,810
-Because I thought,

458
00:22:16,810 --> 00:22:20,053
oh, maybe this is --
this is the validation.

459
00:22:20,053 --> 00:22:22,015
But it´s like,
it was like,

460
00:22:22,015 --> 00:22:25,759
that was what I had
to do to my brain to --

461
00:22:25,759 --> 00:22:29,062
and he even said to me,
you know, "I can trust you

462
00:22:29,062 --> 00:22:30,824
when I can´t trust people."
-Oh, God.

463
00:22:30,824 --> 00:22:34,798
And I was like --
it´s, like, it´s so cliché,

464
00:22:34,798 --> 00:22:37,500
it´s practically pathetic.

465
00:22:37,500 --> 00:22:41,635
-No, it´s predator talk.
I mean, I don´t...

466
00:22:41,635 --> 00:22:48,511
-I believed somehow
I put out a message,

467
00:22:48,511 --> 00:22:52,846
and that was how
the message was received.

468
00:22:52,846 --> 00:22:54,888
I drank wine at dinner.

469
00:22:54,888 --> 00:22:59,693
I, you know --
I went up to the room.

470
00:22:59,693 --> 00:23:02,856
I just was so trusting.

471
00:23:02,856 --> 00:23:05,559
-She was really
turning it inward.

472
00:23:05,559 --> 00:23:09,432
You carry around this kind of
experience of victimization,

473
00:23:09,432 --> 00:23:12,535
and you drag around
your responsibility for it

474
00:23:12,535 --> 00:23:14,107
inaccurately.

475
00:23:14,107 --> 00:23:18,011
This is an adult
who knew what he was doing,

476
00:23:18,011 --> 00:23:21,545
was genuinely responsible,
genuinely culpable.

477
00:23:21,545 --> 00:23:26,519
And -- And she wasn´t, period.

478
00:23:26,519 --> 00:23:28,051
She was crying.

479
00:23:28,051 --> 00:23:31,124
There´s no way that
that can be misinterpreted.

480
00:23:31,124 --> 00:23:34,758
That is not somebody
who´s looking for --

481
00:23:34,758 --> 00:23:38,562
for a sexual experience.

482
00:23:38,562 --> 00:23:39,963
-I wrote a letter.

483
00:23:39,963 --> 00:23:42,636
I said, you know,
"That was a huge trust

484
00:23:42,636 --> 00:23:45,869
that was just blown up

485
00:23:45,869 --> 00:23:48,802
and disintegrated and destroyed.

486
00:23:48,802 --> 00:23:50,874
And how dare you?

487
00:23:50,874 --> 00:23:55,909
And, you know,
I´m better than that.

488
00:23:55,909 --> 00:23:59,482
I´m better than you are,
actually."

489
00:23:59,482 --> 00:24:04,157
You know, that´s the way
I dealt with things.

490
00:24:04,157 --> 00:24:06,620
It was met
with such dismissive --

491
00:24:06,620 --> 00:24:08,592
It was so dismissed

492
00:24:08,592 --> 00:24:10,864
that I just threw my hands up
and I thought,

493
00:24:10,864 --> 00:24:13,126
You know what?
I´m not --

494
00:24:13,126 --> 00:24:15,629
I refuse to be a victim

495
00:24:15,629 --> 00:24:19,903
because this is something
that happens

496
00:24:19,903 --> 00:24:21,975
no matter who you are

497
00:24:21,975 --> 00:24:26,079
and no matter what you think
you´re prepared for or not.

498
00:24:27,941 --> 00:24:32,045
I wanted to erase the whole
thing from my mind and body

499
00:24:32,045 --> 00:24:36,550
and just keep on the path
that I was on.

500
00:24:36,550 --> 00:24:39,122
And the system had never once

501
00:24:39,122 --> 00:24:44,057
come to help me, you know?

502
00:24:44,057 --> 00:24:48,031
So I just had to get stronger
on my own, you know?

503
00:24:52,966 --> 00:24:54,708
[ Propeller whirring ]

504
00:25:03,717 --> 00:25:06,219
-I was doing a movie in Africa.

505
00:25:06,219 --> 00:25:09,623
And I was there
for a good part of it by myself.

506
00:25:11,284 --> 00:25:14,027
Where´s the mother?
-She´d be out hunting.

507
00:25:14,027 --> 00:25:16,129
-But then a friend said to me,

508
00:25:16,129 --> 00:25:19,763
"You know, we´re really
good friends with this guy,

509
00:25:19,763 --> 00:25:21,194
this tennis player.

510
00:25:21,194 --> 00:25:22,696
You guys are very --

511
00:25:22,696 --> 00:25:24,998
There´s something
very similar about you."

512
00:25:28,341 --> 00:25:31,575
I took a Jeep up
to this little spot

513
00:25:31,575 --> 00:25:37,010
where we had one radio tower
and they had a fax machine.

514
00:25:37,010 --> 00:25:40,714
We started faxing

515
00:25:40,714 --> 00:25:44,287
back and forth to each other,
these long letters.

516
00:25:44,287 --> 00:25:46,860
-[ Grunts ]
-Game!

517
00:25:46,860 --> 00:25:49,062
[ Crowd cheering ]

518
00:25:49,062 --> 00:25:52,365
-Total shock and disbelief.

519
00:25:52,365 --> 00:25:56,299
22-year-old Andre Agassi
in tears.

520
00:25:56,299 --> 00:25:58,602
Has won Wimbledon.

521
00:25:58,602 --> 00:26:00,674
[ Cheers and applause ]

522
00:26:00,674 --> 00:26:03,176
-We talked so openly
about our fears

523
00:26:03,176 --> 00:26:05,779
and about being public figures.

524
00:26:05,779 --> 00:26:08,041
We talked about our childhood.

525
00:26:08,041 --> 00:26:10,183
-Andre, how do you like
the game of tennis?

526
00:26:10,183 --> 00:26:11,785
-Fine.

527
00:26:11,785 --> 00:26:13,346
-We had these kind of
intense relationships

528
00:26:13,346 --> 00:26:16,720
with these maternal
and paternal figures.

529
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:22,295
And he was just so open
and honest and funny.

530
00:26:22,295 --> 00:26:25,899
[ Cheers and applause ]

531
00:26:25,899 --> 00:26:27,961
By the time
I went to California,

532
00:26:27,961 --> 00:26:32,105
we were on this path
of falling in love

533
00:26:32,105 --> 00:26:34,738
in a very chaste sort of way.

534
00:26:34,738 --> 00:26:41,745
♫♫

535
00:26:41,745 --> 00:26:48,782
♫♫

536
00:26:48,782 --> 00:26:52,656
-It was such a, like,
quick romance.

537
00:26:52,656 --> 00:26:54,788
They just hit it off.

538
00:26:54,788 --> 00:26:57,290
[ Cheers and applause ]

539
00:26:57,290 --> 00:26:58,962
-I loved that
I didn´t have to be

540
00:26:58,962 --> 00:27:01,665
the biggest thing in the room.

541
00:27:01,665 --> 00:27:03,697
-Australian Open,
Wimbledon.

542
00:27:03,697 --> 00:27:05,368
-Yeah.
-On top of the TV set.

543
00:27:05,368 --> 00:27:08,071
Yeah, just, you know, in a place
that I can see it every day.

544
00:27:08,071 --> 00:27:09,773
Really, you know?
[ Telephone rings ]

545
00:27:09,773 --> 00:27:11,845
There´s the phone.
This phone rings not too often.

546
00:27:11,845 --> 00:27:13,877
[ Laughs ]

547
00:27:13,877 --> 00:27:15,949
Can I call you later?

548
00:27:15,949 --> 00:27:18,852
Okay.
Yeah, I got your number.

549
00:27:18,852 --> 00:27:20,083
[ Laughs ]

550
00:27:20,083 --> 00:27:22,415
All right. I love you.
Bye.

551
00:27:22,415 --> 00:27:24,057
[ Telephone beeps ]

552
00:27:24,057 --> 00:27:25,959
Um...

553
00:27:25,959 --> 00:27:27,691
-Who was that?
-That was Brooke.

554
00:27:30,223 --> 00:27:32,395
-I´ve learned a lot
from him about commitment,

555
00:27:32,395 --> 00:27:35,228
about following through
on your own,

556
00:27:35,228 --> 00:27:37,300
with a lack of using
a tennis term,

557
00:27:37,300 --> 00:27:40,003
but on what you believe in.

558
00:27:41,735 --> 00:27:46,780
He asked me, "Do you seriously
want to be an actress?

559
00:27:46,780 --> 00:27:51,715
´Cause if you do,
why aren´t you doing it?

560
00:27:51,715 --> 00:27:53,947
You´re waiting for something
that´s not happening.

561
00:27:53,947 --> 00:27:55,348
Get an agent.

562
00:27:55,348 --> 00:27:58,992
Start at ground zero
and start up again."

563
00:28:00,223 --> 00:28:04,257
I knew my mom had no intention
of stopping drinking.

564
00:28:06,399 --> 00:28:09,332
-Wow!

565
00:28:09,332 --> 00:28:12,135
-The alcohol
was ruining her brain.

566
00:28:12,135 --> 00:28:15,038
I think she had had
a couple of mini strokes,

567
00:28:15,038 --> 00:28:19,112
and she was starting to, like,
be found in the next state over.

568
00:28:19,112 --> 00:28:22,075
Well, she was gonna
self-destruct.

569
00:28:24,017 --> 00:28:28,521
I was trying to systematically
take control of everything

570
00:28:28,521 --> 00:28:32,355
in a very fair, kind way,

571
00:28:32,355 --> 00:28:34,327
and she wasn´t hearing it.

572
00:28:34,327 --> 00:28:37,460
So I was like, "Okay,
this is gonna be

573
00:28:37,460 --> 00:28:40,934
probably the most violent thing
you´ve ever done."

574
00:28:40,934 --> 00:28:43,867
And it was.

575
00:28:43,867 --> 00:28:47,070
My mom and I had
an office building.

576
00:28:47,070 --> 00:28:48,371
It had all my archives.

577
00:28:48,371 --> 00:28:50,473
It had everything
I´ve ever done.

578
00:28:50,473 --> 00:28:54,447
Andre´s manager and I
organized a team,

579
00:28:54,447 --> 00:28:57,881
and they went into the office
and they gutted it,

580
00:28:57,881 --> 00:29:00,914
and we shipped it out to Vegas.

581
00:29:00,914 --> 00:29:05,188
She went in on a Monday morning
and the place was just hollow.

582
00:29:05,188 --> 00:29:08,361
It was just echoing and nothing.

583
00:29:08,361 --> 00:29:11,565
Even the stuff
that was hers was there.

584
00:29:14,898 --> 00:29:17,500
What she must have felt

585
00:29:17,500 --> 00:29:21,034
walking in their room
to an empty,

586
00:29:21,034 --> 00:29:24,177
echoing four-story building...

587
00:29:26,479 --> 00:29:29,482
She disappeared
for a couple of days,

588
00:29:29,482 --> 00:29:31,384
wouldn´t talk to me, wouldn´t
answer the phone, nothing.

589
00:29:31,384 --> 00:29:33,116
I couldn´t find her.

590
00:29:33,116 --> 00:29:35,488
And, you know, I went through
all the local police

591
00:29:35,488 --> 00:29:41,294
and everybody,
and eventually she surfaced.

592
00:29:41,294 --> 00:29:43,396
She just couldn´t believe,
you know,

593
00:29:43,396 --> 00:29:46,359
"How could you do that to me?
How could you?"

594
00:29:46,359 --> 00:29:50,433
And I said, "I´m just so sorry.

595
00:29:50,433 --> 00:29:52,305
I didn´t know any other way."

596
00:29:54,207 --> 00:29:56,840
I just went under
his whole umbrella,

597
00:29:56,840 --> 00:30:01,615
and everything just got
swept up into it.

598
00:30:01,615 --> 00:30:05,248
She couldn´t believe
that these entities,

599
00:30:05,248 --> 00:30:09,022
these men, you know,
undid everything,

600
00:30:09,022 --> 00:30:11,625
you know,
and that I went along with it.

601
00:30:11,625 --> 00:30:14,127
She was completely broken.

602
00:30:14,127 --> 00:30:16,429
She even talked about it
publicly.

603
00:30:16,429 --> 00:30:19,092
She <i>never</i> forgave me for that.

604
00:30:19,092 --> 00:30:21,595
-I´m the best judge of Brooke.

605
00:30:21,595 --> 00:30:25,268
And I think the people
who are handling her now

606
00:30:25,268 --> 00:30:28,972
cannot be as qualified as I

607
00:30:28,972 --> 00:30:34,608
because they´ve not lived
with her as long as I have.

608
00:30:34,608 --> 00:30:36,249
-Teri couldn´t see that

609
00:30:36,249 --> 00:30:38,181
somebody else would help Brooke,

610
00:30:38,181 --> 00:30:40,013
but talk about
taking care of somebody.

611
00:30:40,013 --> 00:30:44,888
He really did take care of her,
almost in a fatherly way.

612
00:30:44,888 --> 00:30:47,661
♫♫

613
00:30:47,661 --> 00:30:50,093
-It´s not much surprise
that Brooke

614
00:30:50,093 --> 00:30:54,367
moved from a very controlling
circumstance with her mother

615
00:30:54,367 --> 00:30:57,671
to another person
who was very controlling.

616
00:30:57,671 --> 00:31:01,675
And that´s sometimes how you
get out of one relationship

617
00:31:01,675 --> 00:31:06,179
is you get into another one
that answers all the questions

618
00:31:06,179 --> 00:31:07,981
and takes care of everything.

619
00:31:07,981 --> 00:31:10,343
[ Cheers and applause ]

620
00:31:10,343 --> 00:31:15,118
♫♫

621
00:31:15,118 --> 00:31:18,592
-Tonight, I´m going to start
my life over.

622
00:31:18,592 --> 00:31:21,394
Andre, you´ve made my life
come more to life

623
00:31:21,394 --> 00:31:23,026
than I could have
ever dreamt of.

624
00:31:23,026 --> 00:31:24,527
And I love you
with all my heart.

625
00:31:24,527 --> 00:31:28,361
[ Applause ]

626
00:31:28,361 --> 00:31:30,564
Something in me knew
that I wouldn´t be able

627
00:31:30,564 --> 00:31:33,306
to separate from my mother

628
00:31:33,306 --> 00:31:35,368
without somebody like Andre.

629
00:31:35,368 --> 00:31:43,476
♫♫

630
00:31:43,476 --> 00:31:47,150
I remember after the wedding,
we...

631
00:31:47,150 --> 00:31:49,583
we all went to the airport.

632
00:31:52,255 --> 00:31:54,487
They were flying away,

633
00:31:54,487 --> 00:31:57,030
and I went to say goodbye
to Brooke.

634
00:31:57,030 --> 00:32:00,634
Everybody on the plane
was somebody in Andre´s world,

635
00:32:00,634 --> 00:32:04,197
and she´d moved
into Andre´s world.

636
00:32:04,197 --> 00:32:08,471
She really went off into,
you know, something else.

637
00:32:14,548 --> 00:32:17,751
[ Indistinct shouting ]

638
00:32:21,314 --> 00:32:23,456
-I got an agent,

639
00:32:23,456 --> 00:32:26,389
and I was ready
to start up again.

640
00:32:26,389 --> 00:32:28,391
Do I have anything
in there or...

641
00:32:28,391 --> 00:32:30,493
-Just mail back here.
-Yeah? Okay.

642
00:32:30,493 --> 00:32:32,165
Odd.

643
00:32:32,165 --> 00:32:33,767
-It´s on the fire hose.
-It´s on the fire hose.

644
00:32:33,767 --> 00:32:35,699
I have my own fire hose.

645
00:32:35,699 --> 00:32:37,701
Okay.

646
00:32:37,701 --> 00:32:39,372
Alright.

647
00:32:39,372 --> 00:32:42,576
I got cast on Broadway
in "Grease."

648
00:32:42,576 --> 00:32:45,679
-Grease is the word after
her Broadway debut last night.

649
00:32:45,679 --> 00:32:48,682
Brooke is back and tennis star
Andre Agassi is with her

650
00:32:48,682 --> 00:32:52,045
every step of the way.

651
00:32:52,045 --> 00:32:54,317
[ Telephone rings ]

652
00:32:54,317 --> 00:32:56,590
-Excuse me.

653
00:32:56,590 --> 00:32:58,552
[ Laughing ] Hello?

654
00:32:58,552 --> 00:33:01,294
She´s no longer in the show.

655
00:33:01,294 --> 00:33:04,497
This is my dressing room now.

656
00:33:04,497 --> 00:33:06,499
[ Laughing ]
That´s okay.

657
00:33:06,499 --> 00:33:08,161
But you should really come
and see me in the show.

658
00:33:08,161 --> 00:33:11,605
I do a different Rizzo,
but it´s -- it´s great.

659
00:33:11,605 --> 00:33:14,307
Broadway was such
a new medium for me,

660
00:33:14,307 --> 00:33:18,141
and I <i>really</i> had to dig deep.

661
00:33:18,141 --> 00:33:20,443
-♫ She´s gonna be a celebrity ♫

662
00:33:20,443 --> 00:33:23,647
-♫ That means
somebody everyone knows ♫

663
00:33:23,647 --> 00:33:26,750
-When she joined our company,
I was a little skeptical.

664
00:33:26,750 --> 00:33:29,222
-Yes, oh, yes, we both, oh, yes,
we both, oh, yes, we both...

665
00:33:29,222 --> 00:33:32,185
-And then she did
some physical-comedy stuff.

666
00:33:32,185 --> 00:33:33,787
It was hilarious.

667
00:33:33,787 --> 00:33:36,760
The respect level from
the company was, like, up here

668
00:33:36,760 --> 00:33:38,832
because we were watching her
and we were like,

669
00:33:38,832 --> 00:33:43,597
"Oh, she´s got this.
She´s worked for this."

670
00:33:43,597 --> 00:33:45,769
-People did say to my face,

671
00:33:45,769 --> 00:33:48,842
"I really thought you were
gonna suck, but you´re good!"

672
00:33:48,842 --> 00:33:51,244
[ Laughs ] And you´re just like,
"I´ll take it.

673
00:33:51,244 --> 00:33:54,507
Thank you very much
for that generous compliment."

674
00:33:54,507 --> 00:33:57,450
-♫ Come on, Jackson,
you´re gettin´ hip ♫

675
00:33:57,450 --> 00:34:00,253
-More people started
asking me to do comedy.

676
00:34:00,253 --> 00:34:01,555
-Oh, my favorite dish!

677
00:34:01,555 --> 00:34:03,416
I always wanted to do it.

678
00:34:03,416 --> 00:34:06,690
It just never seemed
an option for me.

679
00:34:06,690 --> 00:34:11,124
It started with --
with "Friends."

680
00:34:11,124 --> 00:34:13,526
-Hello.
<i>-It´s Erika.</i>

681
00:34:13,526 --> 00:34:15,198
-Oh, my God.
The stalker.

682
00:34:15,198 --> 00:34:17,370
-They said, "We´re doing
a Super Bowl episode,

683
00:34:17,370 --> 00:34:22,405
and they want you to play
Joey´s psycho girlfriend."

684
00:34:22,405 --> 00:34:23,777
[ Laughter ]

685
00:34:23,777 --> 00:34:26,109
[ Cheers and applause ]

686
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:28,642
Hi.

687
00:34:28,642 --> 00:34:30,383
-Erika.

688
00:34:30,814 --> 00:34:33,516
[ Laughter ]

689
00:34:33,516 --> 00:34:36,119
-We did the scene
where I´m sitting with Joey

690
00:34:36,119 --> 00:34:39,793
and I do this crazy laugh
where I throw my head back

691
00:34:39,793 --> 00:34:42,656
and then I just
get serious again.

692
00:34:42,656 --> 00:34:46,700
Marta Kauffman said,
"Brooke, it´s too much.

693
00:34:46,700 --> 00:34:50,433
The stakes are too high.
It makes you look too crazy."

694
00:34:50,433 --> 00:34:53,536
And -- and I said,
"Yeah, but she´s like,

695
00:34:53,536 --> 00:34:58,672
really pretty,
so she should be <i>really</i> crazy."

696
00:34:58,672 --> 00:35:02,415
When it came time to film
in front of an audience,

697
00:35:02,415 --> 00:35:04,147
we do the first take,

698
00:35:04,147 --> 00:35:06,620
and all of a sudden
from across the stage I hear,

699
00:35:06,620 --> 00:35:09,583
"Shields, put it back in!"

700
00:35:09,583 --> 00:35:11,524
Let me see those hands.

701
00:35:11,524 --> 00:35:13,687
Oh, these hands,
these beautiful hands.

702
00:35:13,687 --> 00:35:16,930
[ Laughs ]
Oh, I could just eat them.

703
00:35:16,930 --> 00:35:19,563
But I won´t.

704
00:35:19,563 --> 00:35:21,534
-Otherwise, my watch
would fell off.

705
00:35:21,534 --> 00:35:27,540
-[ Laughs hysterically ]

706
00:35:27,540 --> 00:35:30,303
No, seriously.

707
00:35:30,303 --> 00:35:31,474
These hands...

708
00:35:31,474 --> 00:35:33,577
Andre 1,000% supported.

709
00:35:33,577 --> 00:35:37,450
He read the script.
He knew what part I was playing.

710
00:35:37,450 --> 00:35:40,283
He knew that I was
a crazy person

711
00:35:40,283 --> 00:35:44,618
who just is obsessed with Joey.

712
00:35:44,618 --> 00:35:46,389
-All right?
[ Chuckles nervously ]

713
00:35:46,389 --> 00:35:49,863
-So I went for it,
and I just start, like,

714
00:35:49,863 --> 00:35:51,765
licking his fingers
and, you know,

715
00:35:51,765 --> 00:35:54,568
just, like, devouring
these surgeon hands.

716
00:35:54,568 --> 00:35:56,369
-You´re good at that.

717
00:35:56,369 --> 00:36:00,433
-I get back
to the dressing room.

718
00:36:00,433 --> 00:36:04,477
Andre had stormed out,
and he said,

719
00:36:04,477 --> 00:36:05,739
"Everybody´s making fun of me
in there.

720
00:36:05,739 --> 00:36:08,612
You made a fool of me.
How dare you?"

721
00:36:08,612 --> 00:36:10,413
You know,
"You´re my girlfriend,

722
00:36:10,413 --> 00:36:12,215
and now you´re sticking
your tongue all over everybody."

723
00:36:12,215 --> 00:36:15,989
And I was just like,
"Y-You read the script.

724
00:36:15,989 --> 00:36:18,822
It wasn´t real."

725
00:36:18,822 --> 00:36:22,225
He drove home.

726
00:36:22,225 --> 00:36:24,598
And he destroyed

727
00:36:24,598 --> 00:36:29,332
every single one
of his trophies,

728
00:36:29,332 --> 00:36:32,505
like, smashed Wimbledon,

729
00:36:32,505 --> 00:36:36,710
smashed French Open.

730
00:36:36,710 --> 00:36:38,742
-And he´s the number-one
tennis player in the world.

731
00:36:38,742 --> 00:36:40,714
He´s just signed
a $150 million contract.

732
00:36:40,714 --> 00:36:42,676
He´s got
his own private jet.

733
00:36:42,676 --> 00:36:44,818
He has you
as his girlfriend.

734
00:36:44,818 --> 00:36:46,750
What´s not
to feel good about?

735
00:36:46,750 --> 00:36:49,022
-But unless you have
a real sense

736
00:36:49,022 --> 00:36:53,727
of your belief in yourself
deserving those things,

737
00:36:53,727 --> 00:36:56,790
then they become
very relative.

738
00:36:56,790 --> 00:36:59,763
I thought,
he´s an intense personality.

739
00:36:59,763 --> 00:37:04,467
And yet because I was so used to
growing up with an alcoholic

740
00:37:04,467 --> 00:37:10,674
whose moods would change,
the erratic behavior didn´t --

741
00:37:10,674 --> 00:37:13,707
I didn´t know what was going on.

742
00:37:13,707 --> 00:37:16,980
I mean, we hardly ever
spoke about it again.

743
00:37:19,983 --> 00:37:24,487
A few years later,
we got a divorce.

744
00:37:24,487 --> 00:37:26,289
We should have
just been friends.

745
00:37:26,289 --> 00:37:29,593
I don´t think we should have
ever been husband and wife.

746
00:37:29,593 --> 00:37:33,827
We weren´t meant
to be each other´s

747
00:37:33,827 --> 00:37:38,431
lifelong partner or parents
of children, you know?

748
00:37:41,805 --> 00:37:48,712
♫♫

749
00:37:48,712 --> 00:37:52,716
-What is the most coveted time
period in all of television?

750
00:37:52,716 --> 00:37:56,790
Thursday night at 9:30
on NBC.

751
00:37:56,790 --> 00:37:59,623
-I got a call from my agent
and they said,

752
00:37:59,623 --> 00:38:01,625
"How would you like
doing your own show?"

753
00:38:01,625 --> 00:38:03,757
-And the winner is...

754
00:38:03,757 --> 00:38:06,860
Brooke Shields
in "Suddenly Susan."

755
00:38:06,860 --> 00:38:08,361
-This fall, Brooke Shields

756
00:38:08,361 --> 00:38:09,763
as you´ve never seen her before.

757
00:38:09,763 --> 00:38:11,905
-One of the surprise stories
in TV this season

758
00:38:11,905 --> 00:38:14,908
is the reemergence
of Brooke Shields.

759
00:38:14,908 --> 00:38:16,810
-What I liked
about "Suddenly Susan"

760
00:38:16,810 --> 00:38:21,014
is that it was the story
of this icon

761
00:38:21,014 --> 00:38:22,646
becoming this different person.

762
00:38:22,646 --> 00:38:25,078
She, in a way, created
a counter plot.

763
00:38:25,078 --> 00:38:27,851
-Check it out. I just got
the new Duran Duran album.

764
00:38:27,851 --> 00:38:29,653
-Radical! Can I see?

765
00:38:29,653 --> 00:38:31,354
-Yeah, sure.
It´s in my locker.

766
00:38:31,354 --> 00:38:32,856
-Excellent.

767
00:38:32,856 --> 00:38:35,859
You know who goes from
"Blue Lagoon" and "Endless Love"

768
00:38:35,859 --> 00:38:39,593
and then wants
to be in a sitcom?

769
00:38:39,593 --> 00:38:42,135
-There´s a whole thing
in the entertainment industry,

770
00:38:42,135 --> 00:38:46,439
which is women can´t be
pretty and funny.

771
00:38:46,439 --> 00:38:51,474
You can´t be on the cover
of magazines and be gorgeous

772
00:38:51,474 --> 00:38:53,977
and also go be a comedian.

773
00:38:53,977 --> 00:38:55,579
Pick a lane, bitch.

774
00:38:55,579 --> 00:38:57,851
-♫ Everybody wants a girl
like Susan ♫

775
00:38:57,851 --> 00:39:00,383
-The camaraderie with the cast

776
00:39:00,383 --> 00:39:03,857
was so energizing.

777
00:39:03,857 --> 00:39:05,819
"Suddenly Susan"
was the first time

778
00:39:05,819 --> 00:39:10,894
I ever felt fully, fully, fully,
fully where I was meant to be.

779
00:39:10,894 --> 00:39:12,596
You don´t know me as well
as you think you do.

780
00:39:12,596 --> 00:39:14,167
-[ Chuckles ] I knew you were
gonna say that.

781
00:39:16,930 --> 00:39:18,932
-You know I was gonna do that?
Huh?

782
00:39:18,932 --> 00:39:20,804
How about that?!
Huh?

783
00:39:20,804 --> 00:39:23,777
-Aah! Wait till I figure out
how to get out of this thing.

784
00:39:23,777 --> 00:39:25,408
-I read the pilot
to play her boss,

785
00:39:25,408 --> 00:39:28,141
and he was very weird,
and I liked it.

786
00:39:28,141 --> 00:39:30,684
No question,
it´s Brooke Shields´ show.

787
00:39:30,684 --> 00:39:32,515
This has everything
going for it.

788
00:39:32,515 --> 00:39:33,687
-Shoulder bump
and shoulder bump

789
00:39:33,687 --> 00:39:35,448
and pivot one, pivot two,

790
00:39:35,448 --> 00:39:36,820
How badly do you want it?!

791
00:39:36,820 --> 00:39:38,521
-I want it!

792
00:39:38,521 --> 00:39:40,594
-It wasn´t like
she became funny. No.

793
00:39:40,594 --> 00:39:45,058
That was always there.
We just didn´t get to see it.

794
00:39:45,058 --> 00:39:49,803
-The physical comedy,
the throwing yourself into it,

795
00:39:49,803 --> 00:39:53,607
was such a catharsis for me.

796
00:39:53,607 --> 00:39:56,670
Somebody cut!

797
00:39:56,670 --> 00:39:58,141
This award --

798
00:39:58,141 --> 00:40:01,945
it represents the essence
of why we do what we do.

799
00:40:01,945 --> 00:40:03,817
Network executives
are just saying,

800
00:40:03,817 --> 00:40:05,649
"Well, we´ve got her,
so that´s good.

801
00:40:05,649 --> 00:40:07,450
So just keep writing the same
show and keep, you know --

802
00:40:07,450 --> 00:40:09,082
have a trip
and fall each episode,

803
00:40:09,082 --> 00:40:11,755
and that´ll be enough."

804
00:40:11,755 --> 00:40:15,058
[ Laughter ]

805
00:40:15,058 --> 00:40:18,692
I was like, "You guys, I´m not
above falling off things.

806
00:40:18,692 --> 00:40:20,063
It´s always funny,

807
00:40:20,063 --> 00:40:23,236
but there´s got to be
more to the comedy here.

808
00:40:23,236 --> 00:40:26,239
If you just use me
in this one way,

809
00:40:26,239 --> 00:40:29,542
we´ll be gone
as quickly as as we got here."

810
00:40:29,542 --> 00:40:33,677
I got a job in New York
so that we could be together.

811
00:40:33,677 --> 00:40:35,148
It was supposed to be
a surprise.

812
00:40:35,148 --> 00:40:37,110
And eventually
the show got canceled,

813
00:40:37,110 --> 00:40:41,114
but it didn´t hinder
my confidence.

814
00:40:41,114 --> 00:40:44,087
I think I did set out to say,

815
00:40:44,087 --> 00:40:47,190
"You all think I can´t do this,
but just watch me."

816
00:40:47,190 --> 00:40:50,023
And I think the same thing was
happening in college as well.

817
00:40:50,023 --> 00:40:51,865
You know, "She´s not gonna
be serious.

818
00:40:51,865 --> 00:40:53,767
She´s not gonna be that bright."

819
00:40:53,767 --> 00:40:55,128
But I thought, you know what?

820
00:40:55,128 --> 00:40:57,070
I´m just gonna
not only surprise them,

821
00:40:57,070 --> 00:40:58,732
but I´m gonna surprise myself

822
00:40:58,732 --> 00:41:01,034
because
whatever I think I can do,

823
00:41:01,034 --> 00:41:04,507
I´m gonna push to be better
in everything.

824
00:41:08,141 --> 00:41:13,547
That I met Chris,
who was the first person

825
00:41:13,547 --> 00:41:16,049
that...

826
00:41:16,049 --> 00:41:20,253
I could be
all of those things with.

827
00:41:20,253 --> 00:41:21,855
-How´d you meet?

828
00:41:21,855 --> 00:41:23,226
-He was writing
a Christmas special

829
00:41:23,226 --> 00:41:24,658
that I was hosting.

830
00:41:24,658 --> 00:41:26,129
-You like him right away?
-Right away.

831
00:41:26,129 --> 00:41:27,200
He´s very down to earth.

832
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:28,832
-He was not intimidated?

833
00:41:28,832 --> 00:41:32,636
-I think he focuses on
my more dorky side.

834
00:41:32,636 --> 00:41:37,070
Chris saw my comedy, and that
was sort of how we met.

835
00:41:38,241 --> 00:41:41,815
It was a very difficult time

836
00:41:41,815 --> 00:41:44,778
coming out of a divorce.

837
00:41:44,778 --> 00:41:47,320
My dad got diagnosed
with cancer.

838
00:41:47,320 --> 00:41:51,885
And here was this
just normal guy, like --

839
00:41:51,885 --> 00:41:56,289
you know, I mean,
I had a big, big life.

840
00:41:56,289 --> 00:41:58,191
He just wasn´t fazed.

841
00:41:58,191 --> 00:42:01,895
He wasn´t fazed by my mother.
He wasn´t fazed by my father.

842
00:42:01,895 --> 00:42:06,800
And he made me just feel
worth all of it.

843
00:42:09,202 --> 00:42:13,076
-The second marriage was
the more mature Brooke

844
00:42:13,076 --> 00:42:16,349
deciding what her life
should look like.

845
00:42:16,349 --> 00:42:22,215
She had a much stronger sense
of being on her own.

846
00:42:22,215 --> 00:42:24,257
-Let me see your tattoo,
Christopher.

847
00:42:24,257 --> 00:42:25,859
-It´s right there.

848
00:42:25,859 --> 00:42:28,161
You might have to use
a wide-angle lens

849
00:42:28,161 --> 00:42:29,963
´cause the guns!

850
00:42:29,963 --> 00:42:31,895
-We´re gonna watch this later.
It´s going to be --

851
00:42:31,895 --> 00:42:33,266
-In you´re gonna laugh
because it´s done...

852
00:42:33,266 --> 00:42:35,829
-Porn.
-...really nicely done.

853
00:42:35,829 --> 00:42:37,000
It´s tasteful.

854
00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:38,632
-[ Laughs ]
It´s tasteful.

855
00:42:38,632 --> 00:42:40,373
Dad, put your arm around Mom
for just a second.

856
00:42:40,373 --> 00:42:43,106
Just to -- a bit of a fantasy
of mine come true.

857
00:42:43,106 --> 00:42:45,609
This one fantasy of mine
come true in my life.

858
00:42:45,609 --> 00:42:47,911
Yes, there it is.
There we go.

859
00:42:47,911 --> 00:42:51,044
[ Guitar playing ]

860
00:42:51,044 --> 00:42:56,249
-♫ Well, let´s give
your heart to me ♫

861
00:42:56,249 --> 00:43:02,826
♫ Let´s bring heaven down here ♫

862
00:43:02,826 --> 00:43:07,030
♫ Let´s bring, yes, heaven ♫

863
00:43:07,030 --> 00:43:09,262
♫ Oh, down ♫

864
00:43:09,262 --> 00:43:15,238
♫ I don´t want to wait
for the angels ♫

865
00:43:15,238 --> 00:43:16,670
-Brooke and Chris,

866
00:43:16,670 --> 00:43:20,213
I now pronounce
you man and wife.

867
00:43:20,213 --> 00:43:22,145
You may kiss the bride.

868
00:43:23,747 --> 00:43:26,650
[ Applause ]

869
00:43:26,650 --> 00:43:29,152
-What do you want to be
when you grow up?

870
00:43:29,152 --> 00:43:31,284
-Well, I want to be a mother.

871
00:43:31,284 --> 00:43:32,926
I mean,
I want to continue acting,

872
00:43:32,926 --> 00:43:34,958
but I also would like
to be a mother,

873
00:43:34,958 --> 00:43:36,329
´cause I love kids.

874
00:43:36,329 --> 00:43:40,694
♫♫

875
00:43:40,694 --> 00:43:44,437
I loved babies
since I was a baby.

876
00:43:44,437 --> 00:43:48,071
I wanted to babysit
before I was old enough.

877
00:43:48,071 --> 00:43:49,773
The only thing that I knew
for sure

878
00:43:49,773 --> 00:43:53,046
was that I wanted to have kids.

879
00:43:53,046 --> 00:43:55,348
And we tried,

880
00:43:55,348 --> 00:43:58,782
and nothing was happening.

881
00:43:58,782 --> 00:44:02,085
I started doing IVF early,
as quickly as I could,

882
00:44:02,085 --> 00:44:04,257
and then when it wasn´t working,

883
00:44:04,257 --> 00:44:07,791
I started going into this,
"I´m being punished" part.

884
00:44:07,791 --> 00:44:09,292
I was like,
"Something´s wrong with me.

885
00:44:09,292 --> 00:44:10,824
Oh, my God.
I´m not meant to be a mother.

886
00:44:10,824 --> 00:44:12,195
How could this be?

887
00:44:12,195 --> 00:44:14,197
I´ve had too much
that´s good in my life."

888
00:44:14,197 --> 00:44:15,999
And he was like, "Stop.

889
00:44:15,999 --> 00:44:18,331
You don´t have to
do that anymore.

890
00:44:18,331 --> 00:44:19,973
You´re not being punished
for anything.

891
00:44:19,973 --> 00:44:21,835
That´s not the way
the world works.

892
00:44:21,835 --> 00:44:25,278
And, you know, snap out of it."
[ Chuckles ]

893
00:44:25,278 --> 00:44:30,243
First time, after all the drugs,
I get pregnant.

894
00:44:30,243 --> 00:44:33,186
Three months later,
I lose that baby.

895
00:44:33,186 --> 00:44:34,918
And he was like,
"We´re gonna wait

896
00:44:34,918 --> 00:44:38,852
till we can do it again,
and we´re gonna do it again."

897
00:44:38,852 --> 00:44:42,095
On the seventh transfer,

898
00:44:42,095 --> 00:44:44,027
I got pregnant

899
00:44:44,027 --> 00:44:46,099
and that was Rowan.

900
00:44:47,901 --> 00:44:51,805
It´s like one of the first times
I really looked at myself.

901
00:44:51,805 --> 00:44:55,809
And I looked at this body,
and it was growing

902
00:44:55,809 --> 00:44:57,110
and it had life in it,

903
00:44:57,110 --> 00:44:59,773
and I was sort of fuller
and flushed,

904
00:44:59,773 --> 00:45:05,148
and I just thought,
I feel sexier than ever,

905
00:45:05,148 --> 00:45:08,251
because it wasn´t just about me.

906
00:45:08,251 --> 00:45:10,854
You know, it was about
this little person.

907
00:45:10,854 --> 00:45:12,185
There was a radiance to that.

908
00:45:12,185 --> 00:45:13,857
And that was one
of the first times

909
00:45:13,857 --> 00:45:18,091
I was like,
"I feel really good."

910
00:45:20,433 --> 00:45:23,536
I had this just vision
of how I wanted to,

911
00:45:23,536 --> 00:45:25,338
you know, scream and sweat,
you know,

912
00:45:25,338 --> 00:45:27,300
they put the baby on your chest
and everything is good.

913
00:45:27,300 --> 00:45:29,472
-24 hours of labor.

914
00:45:29,472 --> 00:45:31,044
-You´re a little stubborn.

915
00:45:31,044 --> 00:45:33,346
-[ Laughs ] Little...
-Just a little stubborn.

916
00:45:33,346 --> 00:45:36,049
You´re a little Taurus.

917
00:45:36,049 --> 00:45:39,012
And the cervix didn´t cooperate.

918
00:45:39,012 --> 00:45:41,014
So we´re gonna take you out

919
00:45:41,014 --> 00:45:42,856
so you can
meet your mom and dad

920
00:45:42,856 --> 00:45:45,188
[cries] soon.

921
00:45:47,060 --> 00:45:48,792
-We´ll see you soon.

922
00:45:48,792 --> 00:45:51,324
-It went from, "We´re gonna
really try to give you

923
00:45:51,324 --> 00:45:53,166
the experience you want"

924
00:45:53,166 --> 00:45:56,229
to emergency C-section

925
00:45:56,229 --> 00:46:00,473
to so much blood loss to...

926
00:46:00,473 --> 00:46:03,977
"You´re not gonna
live through this."

927
00:46:03,977 --> 00:46:06,479
I labored for 24 hours,

928
00:46:06,479 --> 00:46:09,583
and finally Rowan was born.

929
00:46:09,583 --> 00:46:14,387
And everybody
was rejoicing around me.

930
00:46:14,387 --> 00:46:18,051
-Here she had this baby,
and it was so exciting.

931
00:46:18,051 --> 00:46:22,295
But it was pretty clear
not long after they went home

932
00:46:22,295 --> 00:46:25,328
that something was a little off.

933
00:46:27,430 --> 00:46:29,232
-They thought it was
the baby blues.

934
00:46:29,232 --> 00:46:31,835
They all thought,
oh, all the moms cry

935
00:46:31,835 --> 00:46:34,337
and all the moms are exhausted.

936
00:46:34,337 --> 00:46:36,940
I just got back
to our apartment,

937
00:46:36,940 --> 00:46:40,844
and I just gave Chris the baby,

938
00:46:40,844 --> 00:46:43,076
and I left.

939
00:46:43,076 --> 00:46:46,980
I just went to bed, and then
I started taking long showers

940
00:46:46,980 --> 00:46:50,153
and it wouldn´t, you know --
I wouldn´t see anybody.

941
00:46:50,153 --> 00:46:54,928
I wouldn´t talk to anybody.
I wouldn´t -- I just cried.

942
00:46:54,928 --> 00:46:58,161
-After she had Rowan,
she kept asking me, like,

943
00:46:58,161 --> 00:47:00,233
"Did you feel this?"

944
00:47:00,233 --> 00:47:04,267
And, "How come I don´t want
to hold her?

945
00:47:04,267 --> 00:47:06,499
Did you ever feel that,

946
00:47:06,499 --> 00:47:09,573
you know, you just didn´t
want to be around your kids?"

947
00:47:09,573 --> 00:47:14,247
And after a while I said,
"You know, this is not normal."

948
00:47:14,247 --> 00:47:17,110
-That turned into, "Oh, my God.

949
00:47:17,110 --> 00:47:19,983
All of these violent things
are gonna happen to her."

950
00:47:19,983 --> 00:47:23,917
[ Voice breaking ] And I would
see her little body...

951
00:47:23,917 --> 00:47:26,419
I would see her little body
just...

952
00:47:26,419 --> 00:47:28,491
her, like, hurled at the wall

953
00:47:28,491 --> 00:47:30,293
and just lie down, slumped down.

954
00:47:30,293 --> 00:47:33,466
And I wasn´t throwing her.

955
00:47:33,466 --> 00:47:37,400
You know, I wasn´t the one,
but I was...

956
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:39,673
"What kind of a mother
has these thoughts?

957
00:47:39,673 --> 00:47:45,538
I´m supposed to want to live,
breathe, sleep with her."

958
00:47:45,538 --> 00:47:50,614
I was -- I was a monster.
I was just, I was --

959
00:47:50,614 --> 00:47:53,346
passed by things like the block
with all the knives,

960
00:47:53,346 --> 00:47:57,320
and you´re like,
"That could slice into her

961
00:47:57,320 --> 00:48:02,425
helpless, little,
can´t-even-talk-yet body and --"

962
00:48:02,425 --> 00:48:03,957
Like, it was -- it was --

963
00:48:03,957 --> 00:48:08,231
I thought I was going
truly insane.

964
00:48:08,231 --> 00:48:12,706
-She wasn´t, though,
talking about it immediately.

965
00:48:12,706 --> 00:48:15,709
And she put so much pressure
on herself to be perfect

966
00:48:15,709 --> 00:48:18,171
that she wasn´t meeting
her expectations

967
00:48:18,171 --> 00:48:19,613
for what she should feel like

968
00:48:19,613 --> 00:48:22,445
and how she should know
how to do everything.

969
00:48:22,445 --> 00:48:24,417
-Nobody understood me,

970
00:48:24,417 --> 00:48:29,382
and my husband was just
so at a loss, you know,

971
00:48:29,382 --> 00:48:35,088
and he said,
"I went to go see other mothers

972
00:48:35,088 --> 00:48:37,060
buying things for their kids,

973
00:48:37,060 --> 00:48:38,962
and they were all humming
and singing

974
00:48:38,962 --> 00:48:41,494
and holding their babies
and loving on them."

975
00:48:41,494 --> 00:48:45,168
And he was like,
"Why don´t you sing to her?"

976
00:48:45,168 --> 00:48:48,572
And I was like,
"I -- she doesn´t need me.

977
00:48:48,572 --> 00:48:50,343
She doesn´t need me."

978
00:48:52,746 --> 00:48:56,610
Finally,
someone who´s a doula said,

979
00:48:56,610 --> 00:48:59,452
"I think she has postpartum."

980
00:48:59,452 --> 00:49:04,618
And, you know,
would I take some medication?

981
00:49:04,618 --> 00:49:06,620
-Getting the outside help
she needed

982
00:49:06,620 --> 00:49:10,564
was really important for her
to understand that it´s okay.

983
00:49:10,564 --> 00:49:12,596
Like, you don´t have
to be perfect.

984
00:49:12,596 --> 00:49:15,168
You´ll get through
to the other side.

985
00:49:15,168 --> 00:49:17,631
-I started seeing
a postpartum therapist.

986
00:49:17,631 --> 00:49:20,704
Over the course
of the next few months,

987
00:49:20,704 --> 00:49:23,336
I sort of started coming
to my senses

988
00:49:23,336 --> 00:49:27,210
and being much more present
in the room.

989
00:49:27,210 --> 00:49:30,614
I was working with an agent
at the time, and he said,

990
00:49:30,614 --> 00:49:33,516
"You know, if you´re --
you should tell your story.

991
00:49:33,516 --> 00:49:35,118
You know, you should..."

992
00:49:35,118 --> 00:49:37,250
And I said,
"Nobody´s gonna want to hear

993
00:49:37,250 --> 00:49:39,122
a celebrity on a soapbox.

994
00:49:39,122 --> 00:49:41,354
You know, ´I have everything
and I get the baby of my dreams

995
00:49:41,354 --> 00:49:43,356
and I´m sad,´ you know?"

996
00:49:43,356 --> 00:49:47,230
He said,
"You´ve been through that,

997
00:49:47,230 --> 00:49:48,562
and you could help people."

998
00:49:54,808 --> 00:49:58,141
-Brooke has written a new book
called "Down Came the Rain:

999
00:49:58,141 --> 00:50:00,443
My Journey Through
Postpartum Depression."

1000
00:50:00,443 --> 00:50:04,578
-I decided to talk about
the experience publicly

1001
00:50:04,578 --> 00:50:10,223
because I was made to feel
that somehow I was --

1002
00:50:10,223 --> 00:50:12,726
the fault was with me

1003
00:50:12,726 --> 00:50:14,427
and that it really
wasn´t that common,

1004
00:50:14,427 --> 00:50:15,789
´cause nobody
was talking about it.

1005
00:50:15,789 --> 00:50:17,460
I thought I was going to
look at her and I thought

1006
00:50:17,460 --> 00:50:20,463
I was going to see my soul
in her eyes.

1007
00:50:20,463 --> 00:50:22,235
And you were gonna
look at your baby --

1008
00:50:22,235 --> 00:50:24,167
-Everything that everybody
ever says --

1009
00:50:24,167 --> 00:50:27,300
"It´s the most amazing moment
of your life, and oh, my God."

1010
00:50:27,300 --> 00:50:29,342
-I don´t know how many people
are really telling the truth,

1011
00:50:29,342 --> 00:50:31,474
´cause I --
[ Laughter ]

1012
00:50:31,474 --> 00:50:33,607
I think it gave
people permission

1013
00:50:33,607 --> 00:50:38,612
to feel these things
and get help.

1014
00:50:38,612 --> 00:50:41,184
-She talked so publicly
about something

1015
00:50:41,184 --> 00:50:48,221
that had been really dismissed
by some people,

1016
00:50:48,221 --> 00:50:51,324
not recognized, not understood.

1017
00:50:51,324 --> 00:50:54,598
And she brought it
much more out into the open,

1018
00:50:54,598 --> 00:50:58,702
really demystified it
in some ways.

1019
00:50:58,702 --> 00:51:00,874
-You write that, "He was holding
our little girl.

1020
00:51:00,874 --> 00:51:03,306
Chris looked optimistic
and peaceful.

1021
00:51:03,306 --> 00:51:06,309
Wasn´t he lucky?
I was bleeding buckets

1022
00:51:06,309 --> 00:51:07,581
and he was holding on
tightly

1023
00:51:07,581 --> 00:51:10,884
to a perfect,
frowning angel baby.

1024
00:51:10,884 --> 00:51:14,147
I stared at this
glowing father-child image

1025
00:51:14,147 --> 00:51:17,150
and was bombarded with feelings
of jealousy,

1026
00:51:17,150 --> 00:51:18,321
fear, and rage."

1027
00:51:18,321 --> 00:51:20,253
-There is a myth around

1028
00:51:20,253 --> 00:51:23,697
the ease with which
birthing a child

1029
00:51:23,697 --> 00:51:25,629
and falling in love
with your child

1030
00:51:25,629 --> 00:51:28,762
and being maternal
naturally to your child

1031
00:51:28,762 --> 00:51:30,804
that came out of your body.

1032
00:51:30,804 --> 00:51:32,666
And it´s really
a frightening thing

1033
00:51:32,666 --> 00:51:35,138
to have the picture
look different.

1034
00:51:35,138 --> 00:51:36,710
-This reverts to the mommy myth

1035
00:51:36,710 --> 00:51:40,574
that every mother is inherently
a naturally, you know --

1036
00:51:40,574 --> 00:51:43,416
a committed, dedicated,
you know, adoring,

1037
00:51:43,416 --> 00:51:46,519
and, you know,
accomplished mother

1038
00:51:46,519 --> 00:51:48,151
and loves every minute of it.

1039
00:51:48,151 --> 00:51:50,283
And, of course,
this isn´t true for anyone.

1040
00:51:50,283 --> 00:51:52,626
And I think when someone like
Brooke Shields comes out

1041
00:51:52,626 --> 00:51:55,258
and talks about it,
it makes a difference.

1042
00:51:55,258 --> 00:51:57,691
-And it wasn´t just about,
you know,

1043
00:51:57,691 --> 00:52:00,163
wallowing in
her own self experience.

1044
00:52:00,163 --> 00:52:01,695
You know, she did it to...

1045
00:52:03,567 --> 00:52:05,338
...to let people feel okay.

1046
00:52:05,338 --> 00:52:07,641
You know, and then that sort of
became hijacked from her.

1047
00:52:07,641 --> 00:52:10,303
-There is no such thing
as a chemical imbalance.

1048
00:52:10,303 --> 00:52:13,376
-Tom Cruise denounced her
on the "Today" show.

1049
00:52:13,376 --> 00:52:14,778
-The thing that I´m saying
about Brooke

1050
00:52:14,778 --> 00:52:18,181
is that there´s
misinformation, okay?

1051
00:52:18,181 --> 00:52:20,954
And she doesn´t understand
the history of psychiatry.

1052
00:52:20,954 --> 00:52:22,816
She doesn´t understand,
in the same way

1053
00:52:22,816 --> 00:52:24,457
that you don´t
understand it, Matt.

1054
00:52:24,457 --> 00:52:27,621
-Well, if anti-depressants
work for Brooke Shields,

1055
00:52:27,621 --> 00:52:28,862
why isn´t that okay?

1056
00:52:28,862 --> 00:52:30,393
-I disagree with it.

1057
00:52:30,393 --> 00:52:32,626
-You´re attacked by
one of the most powerful

1058
00:52:32,626 --> 00:52:34,768
male movie stars in the world.

1059
00:52:34,768 --> 00:52:37,200
You´re attacked
for seeing a psychiatrist,

1060
00:52:37,200 --> 00:52:39,703
for taking meds.

1061
00:52:39,703 --> 00:52:42,606
-She doesn´t know
what these drugs are.

1062
00:52:42,606 --> 00:52:44,908
And for her to promote it
is irresponsible.

1063
00:52:44,908 --> 00:52:48,612
-Tom Cruise taking a position
of authority like that --

1064
00:52:48,612 --> 00:52:50,343
it´s a risk.

1065
00:52:50,343 --> 00:52:54,347
And, boy, oh, boy,
Brooke responded to that.

1066
00:52:54,347 --> 00:52:55,649
-And then what does she do?

1067
00:52:55,649 --> 00:52:58,491
She writes a very serious
op-ed piece

1068
00:52:58,491 --> 00:52:59,723
in "The New York Times."

1069
00:52:59,723 --> 00:53:03,326
This was a very sober, rational,

1070
00:53:03,326 --> 00:53:05,699
thoughtful,
and informative piece.

1071
00:53:05,699 --> 00:53:06,930
It was brilliant.

1072
00:53:06,930 --> 00:53:09,232
-In "The New York Times,"

1073
00:53:09,232 --> 00:53:14,638
responding to this accusation
of basically bad parenting

1074
00:53:14,638 --> 00:53:16,409
being a bad mom,

1075
00:53:16,409 --> 00:53:19,272
echoes of the past.

1076
00:53:19,272 --> 00:53:22,746
Brooke just stated her case.

1077
00:53:22,746 --> 00:53:24,848
That´s a girl with a big brain.

1078
00:53:24,848 --> 00:53:26,850
She not just has a big brain
´cause she´s six feet tall.

1079
00:53:26,850 --> 00:53:28,552
She´s got a big brain.

1080
00:53:28,552 --> 00:53:30,483
-"To suggest that I should have
taken vitamins

1081
00:53:30,483 --> 00:53:33,256
and exercised shows an utter
lack of understanding

1082
00:53:33,256 --> 00:53:36,489
about postpartum depression,"
Shields shot back.

1083
00:53:36,489 --> 00:53:39,392
Today, doctors overwhelmingly
say Cruise,

1084
00:53:39,392 --> 00:53:41,595
who insists he´s read
all the research,

1085
00:53:41,595 --> 00:53:42,896
is misinformed.

1086
00:53:42,896 --> 00:53:44,838
-Do you think that
if you had just done

1087
00:53:44,838 --> 00:53:47,400
exercise and vitamins,
you could have gotten better?

1088
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:49,502
[ Laughter ]

1089
00:53:49,502 --> 00:53:51,805
-I --
-Why y´all laughing?

1090
00:53:51,805 --> 00:53:54,477
[ Laughter ]

1091
00:53:54,477 --> 00:53:56,379
-And it was so ridiculous to me.

1092
00:53:56,379 --> 00:53:59,282
It´s not about the moral thing

1093
00:53:59,282 --> 00:54:01,915
or the right thing
or the good thing.

1094
00:54:01,915 --> 00:54:04,387
It´s about who has more power.

1095
00:54:04,387 --> 00:54:07,761
-Her remark that he should stick
to fighting aliens --

1096
00:54:07,761 --> 00:54:11,364
that was a fascinating display
of her new persona.

1097
00:54:11,364 --> 00:54:16,069
Not a sex symbol,
but a morally courageous person.

1098
00:54:16,069 --> 00:54:18,732
-Tom Cruise told actress
Brooke Shields this week

1099
00:54:18,732 --> 00:54:21,705
that he is sorry for publicly
criticizing her last year.

1100
00:54:21,705 --> 00:54:23,436
-After Brooke´s
appearance on the show,

1101
00:54:23,436 --> 00:54:24,908
we received letters
from women all over the world

1102
00:54:24,908 --> 00:54:27,781
who said Brooke´s courage
changed their lives.

1103
00:54:27,781 --> 00:54:29,913
-I understand with the road
to the worst could feel like,

1104
00:54:29,913 --> 00:54:33,416
and so now I´m --
I´m so much more educated

1105
00:54:33,416 --> 00:54:34,818
on myself and my body.

1106
00:54:34,818 --> 00:54:36,790
More people started
talking about it.

1107
00:54:36,790 --> 00:54:40,093
You know, we were able to change
some legislation.

1108
00:54:40,093 --> 00:54:41,825
-Just two days
before Mother´s Day,

1109
00:54:41,825 --> 00:54:43,957
the Senate including legislation

1110
00:54:43,957 --> 00:54:47,360
for new research
into postpartum depression.

1111
00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:50,964
Actress Brooke Shields on hand
to help introduce the measure.

1112
00:54:50,964 --> 00:54:52,636
-And the knowledge
of postpartum

1113
00:54:52,636 --> 00:54:56,439
is a tool that I believe
all women deserve.

1114
00:54:56,439 --> 00:54:58,011
-The MOTHERS Act
is also expected

1115
00:54:58,011 --> 00:55:00,443
to help doctors discover
new treatment

1116
00:55:00,443 --> 00:55:02,345
for women suffering
from the illness.

1117
00:55:02,345 --> 00:55:06,880
-That kind of changed
everything for me.

1118
00:55:06,880 --> 00:55:08,051
Are you so cozy?

1119
00:55:08,051 --> 00:55:09,623
-Yeah.
-Ah!

1120
00:55:09,623 --> 00:55:10,724
-Can you count?

1121
00:55:10,724 --> 00:55:11,825
-Yeah.
-Okay, count.

1122
00:55:11,825 --> 00:55:13,356
-One.
-Mm-hmm.

1123
00:55:13,356 --> 00:55:14,888
-Two.
-Mm-hmm.

1124
00:55:14,888 --> 00:55:17,931
And then when my second child,
Grier, was born,

1125
00:55:17,931 --> 00:55:20,533
I was so much more prepared.

1126
00:55:20,533 --> 00:55:24,768
-Eight, nine, and ten!

1127
00:55:24,768 --> 00:55:26,840
-Ooh! [ Laughs ]

1128
00:55:26,840 --> 00:55:34,708
♫♫

1129
00:55:34,708 --> 00:55:36,650
When I was born,
my mother, I mean --

1130
00:55:36,650 --> 00:55:38,011
she was so afraid
I was gonna die,

1131
00:55:38,011 --> 00:55:40,083
she slept with me
strapped to her chest.

1132
00:55:40,083 --> 00:55:42,415
She tried to keep me there
basically

1133
00:55:42,415 --> 00:55:44,588
for the rest of my life.

1134
00:55:44,588 --> 00:55:46,489
It got a little awkward

1135
00:55:46,489 --> 00:55:49,092
as I got bigger, you know?

1136
00:55:49,092 --> 00:55:52,495
But there was that feeling
that I was so afraid

1137
00:55:52,495 --> 00:55:54,928
that she would be gone
from me, too.

1138
00:55:56,499 --> 00:56:01,635
In the later years of her life,
she was just acting differently.

1139
00:56:01,635 --> 00:56:03,977
I took her to get evaluated.

1140
00:56:03,977 --> 00:56:05,478
The doctor took me aside
and said,

1141
00:56:05,478 --> 00:56:08,541
"She´s -- she really has
early signs of,

1142
00:56:08,541 --> 00:56:12,545
you know, dementia,
but it could be rapid."

1143
00:56:12,545 --> 00:56:17,591
So that´s when we, you know,
found a facility for her.

1144
00:56:17,591 --> 00:56:19,152
But I said, "I love you.

1145
00:56:19,152 --> 00:56:21,595
I will come at any moment
here in the middle of the night.

1146
00:56:21,595 --> 00:56:23,957
They´ll call me."

1147
00:56:23,957 --> 00:56:26,199
I didn´t know what else to say.

1148
00:56:28,802 --> 00:56:30,203
There was never a goodbye.

1149
00:56:30,203 --> 00:56:32,165
There was never a,
"I´ve always loved you.

1150
00:56:32,165 --> 00:56:36,209
Thank you,"
or, "You´ve been a great mom."

1151
00:56:36,209 --> 00:56:40,644
And when she died,
there´s no real kind of closure

1152
00:56:40,644 --> 00:56:44,147
or anything beautiful about it.

1153
00:56:44,147 --> 00:56:47,851
But I sort of had said
goodbye a long time ago.

1154
00:56:47,851 --> 00:56:53,627
♫♫

1155
00:56:53,627 --> 00:56:58,732
I used to believe that
if my mother died, I would die.

1156
00:56:58,732 --> 00:57:04,898
And it wasn´t going to be until
she didn´t exist on this Earth

1157
00:57:04,898 --> 00:57:07,571
that I would truly
then would be on my own.

1158
00:57:07,571 --> 00:57:13,206
And there´s a -- there is
some truth to that, you know,

1159
00:57:13,206 --> 00:57:18,882
some archetypal truth,
I think, for me, anyway.

1160
00:57:18,882 --> 00:57:20,614
-She´s grown up.

1161
00:57:20,614 --> 00:57:22,255
And it´s hard for me
to understand that

1162
00:57:22,255 --> 00:57:24,017
because we were so close.

1163
00:57:24,017 --> 00:57:26,960
And to have been able
to turn around and realize

1164
00:57:26,960 --> 00:57:28,722
that she´s her own person

1165
00:57:28,722 --> 00:57:31,925
and do the things
she wants to do independently,

1166
00:57:31,925 --> 00:57:35,729
and I´m very proud of her
for that.

1167
00:57:35,729 --> 00:57:39,072
-You raise your kids
to let them fly.

1168
00:57:39,072 --> 00:57:42,876
My flying was the thing
that most terrified her.

1169
00:57:42,876 --> 00:57:45,779
And then she was gone.

1170
00:57:45,779 --> 00:57:54,187
♫♫

1171
00:58:01,595 --> 00:58:03,897
Hmm. This is me thinking.

1172
00:58:03,897 --> 00:58:06,860
Hmm.
This is a sign of thinking.

1173
00:58:06,860 --> 00:58:08,932
Hmm. Hmm.

1174
00:58:08,932 --> 00:58:10,203
[ Laughs ]

1175
00:58:10,203 --> 00:58:12,005
Look, I´m dancing with life.

1176
00:58:12,005 --> 00:58:14,107
Wait a minute.
I´m also serious.

1177
00:58:14,107 --> 00:58:18,211
Look at me.
This is me as a businesswoman.

1178
00:58:18,211 --> 00:58:21,645
This is me playful!
[ Laughs ]

1179
00:58:21,645 --> 00:58:24,618
I´m looking towards the future.
What is in my future?

1180
00:58:24,618 --> 00:58:26,680
What is the next move
for Brooke Shields?

1181
00:58:26,680 --> 00:58:28,021
[ Laughs ]

1182
00:58:28,021 --> 00:58:33,957
♫♫

1183
00:58:33,957 --> 00:58:36,660
-Oh, you´re doing dishes, Grier?
-Apparently.

1184
00:58:36,660 --> 00:58:38,632
[ Laughter ]

1185
00:58:40,063 --> 00:58:43,266
-When Grier wanted to model,

1186
00:58:43,266 --> 00:58:44,968
I said, "No, no, no, no."

1187
00:58:44,968 --> 00:58:46,670
That´s all I said was, "No."

1188
00:58:46,670 --> 00:58:48,702
And then at a certain point,
I thought,

1189
00:58:48,702 --> 00:58:53,046
Oh, my God, it´s not gonna
matter what you say.

1190
00:58:53,046 --> 00:58:56,780
If she wants to do this,
she´s gonna do it.

1191
00:58:56,780 --> 00:58:59,012
So she´s gonna do it.

1192
00:58:59,012 --> 00:59:04,057
I better help her
get on the right start.

1193
00:59:04,057 --> 00:59:07,961
I know this industry is
predicated on eating its young.

1194
00:59:07,961 --> 00:59:11,965
Like, it wants
to devour them.

1195
00:59:11,965 --> 00:59:13,927
You know, I try to learn
from my experience

1196
00:59:13,927 --> 00:59:16,229
and protect my girls now.

1197
00:59:16,229 --> 00:59:18,702
And I don´t know exactly
how to do it.

1198
00:59:18,702 --> 00:59:20,974
-Everybody get your phone
at the table, please,

1199
00:59:20,974 --> 00:59:23,707
and check your social media.

1200
00:59:23,707 --> 00:59:26,710
Take some photos of the food
for your social media.

1201
00:59:26,710 --> 00:59:29,182
[ Laughter ]

1202
00:59:29,182 --> 00:59:31,785
-The steak is so good, Dad.
-Oh, good.

1203
00:59:31,785 --> 00:59:34,688
-Yeah, the whole thing
is so good.

1204
00:59:34,688 --> 00:59:37,090
-There was something I wanted to
watch the other week.

1205
00:59:37,090 --> 00:59:40,093
It was like the "Gossip Girl"
for adults.

1206
00:59:40,093 --> 00:59:41,955
-"Lipstick Jungle."

1207
00:59:41,955 --> 00:59:45,258
-I feel like it was like
old people and "Gossip Girl."

1208
00:59:45,258 --> 00:59:48,932
-Okay. Jesus Christ.
-I´m not wrong.

1209
00:59:48,932 --> 00:59:52,806
-Yeah. Ah. Mm. Slightly.

1210
00:59:52,806 --> 00:59:55,939
You never saw any
of my earlier movies.

1211
00:59:55,939 --> 00:59:58,772
You haven´t seen "Pretty Baby."
You haven´t seen "Blue Lagoon."

1212
00:59:58,772 --> 01:00:00,313
You haven´t even seen
"Endless Love."

1213
01:00:00,313 --> 01:00:04,147
-No. I will never, <i>ever</i>
watch "Blue Lagoon."

1214
01:00:04,147 --> 01:00:07,020
Sorry.
-Okay.

1215
01:00:07,020 --> 01:00:08,722
-Why not "Blue Lagoon"?

1216
01:00:08,722 --> 01:00:10,824
-´Cause she´s, like,
naked.

1217
01:00:10,824 --> 01:00:13,126
I see "Pretty Baby"
edits on TikTok,

1218
01:00:13,126 --> 01:00:15,258
and it makes me
not want to watch it.

1219
01:00:15,258 --> 01:00:18,031
´Cause it´s like
the movie itself is, like --

1220
01:00:18,031 --> 01:00:19,893
this is nothing against --
no, no, no, no, no.

1221
01:00:19,893 --> 01:00:21,294
-I´m not taking this
personally.

1222
01:00:21,294 --> 01:00:25,068
-I´m saying the movie itself is,
like, about...

1223
01:00:25,068 --> 01:00:28,001
something that´s not okay now,
right?

1224
01:00:28,001 --> 01:00:29,442
-I´m not disagreeing
with you.

1225
01:00:29,442 --> 01:00:33,176
It is a -- it was a true story
about something

1226
01:00:33,176 --> 01:00:35,949
that actually happened
in the early 1900s.

1227
01:00:35,949 --> 01:00:40,754
So that to depict that now
would not be permittable.

1228
01:00:40,754 --> 01:00:42,686
-That´s what --
okay, so yes.

1229
01:00:42,686 --> 01:00:44,257
-I´m agreeing with you,
but it´s important

1230
01:00:44,257 --> 01:00:45,458
to make the distinction.

1231
01:00:45,458 --> 01:00:47,090
-Yes, I understand
it was okay once,

1232
01:00:47,090 --> 01:00:49,392
but now it´s just, like,
a different --

1233
01:00:49,392 --> 01:00:52,996
-See, I never saw "Pretty Baby."
Is there nudity in it?

1234
01:00:52,996 --> 01:00:54,327
-Yes.
-Are you nude?

1235
01:00:54,327 --> 01:00:57,030
-I´m nude twice.
-Mm.

1236
01:00:57,030 --> 01:00:59,202
-With my little
11-year-old body.

1237
01:00:59,202 --> 01:01:01,074
<i>-That´s</i> weird.
-That´s weird.

1238
01:01:01,074 --> 01:01:03,206
-Okay, what´s weird
about that?

1239
01:01:03,206 --> 01:01:05,208
-This is nothing against
the movie. I don´t want --

1240
01:01:05,208 --> 01:01:06,810
-There´s no judgment.
I do not --

1241
01:01:06,810 --> 01:01:08,882
I´m interested
in that concept.

1242
01:01:08,882 --> 01:01:10,343
What is weird
about that?

1243
01:01:10,343 --> 01:01:11,915
-During that time
it came out,

1244
01:01:11,915 --> 01:01:14,217
and that was considered
something

1245
01:01:14,217 --> 01:01:17,450
that was, like, very well done,
very well-written.

1246
01:01:17,450 --> 01:01:18,922
Like, you were great in it.

1247
01:01:18,922 --> 01:01:21,995
-Only in Europe.
-Only in Europe? Oh.

1248
01:01:21,995 --> 01:01:24,297
-Why wouldn´t you be able
to see that movie today?

1249
01:01:24,297 --> 01:01:26,359
Why wouldn´t that movie
be able to be made today?

1250
01:01:26,359 --> 01:01:27,961
-Like, it´s just
everything´s changed.

1251
01:01:27,961 --> 01:01:30,433
-It´s called child pornography,
technically.

1252
01:01:30,433 --> 01:01:32,836
-Also, just, like, everything
is different now.

1253
01:01:32,836 --> 01:01:34,407
-You do have shows like
"Euphoria" where, you know,

1254
01:01:34,407 --> 01:01:37,340
you have girls that are young
playing characters

1255
01:01:37,340 --> 01:01:40,413
that do go through
sexual things, but --

1256
01:01:40,413 --> 01:01:41,915
-Yeah,
but they´re not 11.

1257
01:01:41,915 --> 01:01:46,249
They´re all like 25
playing like 16.

1258
01:01:46,249 --> 01:01:48,051
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.

1259
01:01:48,051 --> 01:01:51,384
Like, all of those people,
they´re like over 21, like...

1260
01:01:51,384 --> 01:01:54,357
-Sydney Sweeney´s
actually 24.

1261
01:01:54,357 --> 01:01:56,459
And so there wasn´t really
a negative, like, backlash.

1262
01:01:56,459 --> 01:01:59,232
-She was old enough
to consent to it.

1263
01:01:59,232 --> 01:02:00,934
You were 11.

1264
01:02:00,934 --> 01:02:04,337
You weren´t mature enough
to be making your own decisions.

1265
01:02:04,337 --> 01:02:06,770
And other people
signed off, being like,

1266
01:02:06,770 --> 01:02:08,071
"Oh, no, she´s fine.

1267
01:02:08,071 --> 01:02:11,304
You can take her top off.
She´s fine."

1268
01:02:11,304 --> 01:02:13,376
-Okay, then let me ask you
about TikTok

1269
01:02:13,376 --> 01:02:15,348
and let me ask you
about Instagram.

1270
01:02:15,348 --> 01:02:17,180
When I see --
okay, by the way --

1271
01:02:17,180 --> 01:02:19,112
-How is that different
from...?

1272
01:02:19,112 --> 01:02:21,514
-You´re like 16.
-Okay. All right.

1273
01:02:21,514 --> 01:02:24,988
-And I can post myself
in a bikini...

1274
01:02:24,988 --> 01:02:28,892
-She´s posting it herself.
-I´m posting it myself.

1275
01:02:28,892 --> 01:02:30,864
-Okay,
so there´s ownership of...

1276
01:02:30,864 --> 01:02:32,025
-Yeah
-You look gorgeous.

1277
01:02:32,025 --> 01:02:33,496
-Yes.
-You do, too.

1278
01:02:33,496 --> 01:02:35,999
Like, and you should
feel that.

1279
01:02:35,999 --> 01:02:38,201
Is that empowering?

1280
01:02:38,201 --> 01:02:39,232
-Yes.
-Yeah.

1281
01:02:39,232 --> 01:02:40,503
-Okay.

1282
01:02:40,503 --> 01:02:42,906
You´re creating your own
self-confidence.

1283
01:02:42,906 --> 01:02:44,177
-Yes.

1284
01:02:44,177 --> 01:02:46,940
-Are you -- [ Laughs ]
-What?

1285
01:02:46,940 --> 01:02:48,942
-You´ve been invited
to this dinner, you know.

1286
01:02:48,942 --> 01:02:50,944
-I´m just listening
and learning.

1287
01:02:50,944 --> 01:02:52,315
-Learning from their --

1288
01:02:52,315 --> 01:02:57,591
They´re being so honest
and articulate.

1289
01:02:57,591 --> 01:02:59,522
-You know, it´s good to hear.
It´s interesting.

1290
01:02:59,522 --> 01:03:01,595
-Would you have let us
at the age of 11 --

1291
01:03:01,595 --> 01:03:04,197
-No.
-Yeah.

1292
01:03:04,197 --> 01:03:07,060
-So why?
Am I a hypocrite? Like...

1293
01:03:07,060 --> 01:03:09,202
-No.
-You weren´t a mom then.

1294
01:03:09,202 --> 01:03:10,934
-Yeah.
-You were the model.

1295
01:03:10,934 --> 01:03:13,206
You weren´t the -- you were
looking to your mom,

1296
01:03:13,206 --> 01:03:14,568
and she had all the answers,

1297
01:03:14,568 --> 01:03:16,469
and so you weren´t
gonna question that.

1298
01:03:16,469 --> 01:03:18,171
-Right.

1299
01:03:18,171 --> 01:03:20,173
-You also weren´t
the only one, you know?

1300
01:03:20,173 --> 01:03:24,477
Like, you weren´t the only
underage, like, female

1301
01:03:24,477 --> 01:03:28,552
being oversexualized
in this film industry

1302
01:03:28,552 --> 01:03:30,053
during this time.

1303
01:03:30,053 --> 01:03:32,155
I would love for you
to get on a show,

1304
01:03:32,155 --> 01:03:34,457
like, something
the young kids watch.

1305
01:03:34,457 --> 01:03:38,031
-Something the young
whippersnappers watch?

1306
01:03:38,031 --> 01:03:39,132
-Yeah.

1307
01:03:39,132 --> 01:03:41,164
-I loved "Friends."

1308
01:03:41,164 --> 01:03:44,237
"Leap of Faith."
-[ Speaks indistinctly ]

1309
01:03:44,237 --> 01:03:46,099
-Oh, "Chalet Girl."
That´s good.

1310
01:03:46,099 --> 01:03:49,102
-Oh! No!
"Hot Flashes."

1311
01:03:49,102 --> 01:03:51,645
-"And I took ´em to the curb
and I said,

1312
01:03:51,645 --> 01:03:54,347
´Put a boot up my butt,´
and walked away."

1313
01:03:54,347 --> 01:03:55,979
It´s always random lines
that are like...

1314
01:03:55,979 --> 01:04:00,383
"And I said to him,
´Oh, please, I´m drowning.

1315
01:04:00,383 --> 01:04:02,015
Can you please
get me from the water?´

1316
01:04:02,015 --> 01:04:04,487
´Find a way to lose,
ma´am.´"

1317
01:04:04,487 --> 01:04:08,091
-[ Laughs ]

1318
01:04:08,091 --> 01:04:11,464
You never told me
you watched any of these.

1319
01:04:11,464 --> 01:04:13,226
[ Laughs ]

1320
01:04:14,598 --> 01:04:17,631
My girls are so
in their own bodies and skin,

1321
01:04:17,631 --> 01:04:22,636
and they have their own opinions
and they voice them.

1322
01:04:24,107 --> 01:04:27,510
I wasn´t told it was important
to have agency.

1323
01:04:27,510 --> 01:04:30,383
´Cause my mom could have it
for me

1324
01:04:30,383 --> 01:04:35,288
or directors I was working with
or those, you know, industry.

1325
01:04:35,288 --> 01:04:39,693
Now it´s like I´m allowed
to be a human being.

1326
01:04:39,693 --> 01:04:43,526
Having daughters changed me
because they´ve taught me that.

1327
01:04:45,559 --> 01:04:49,502
-It´s shocking to me
how dangerous

1328
01:04:49,502 --> 01:04:53,306
the young child actors lane is

1329
01:04:53,306 --> 01:04:56,369
and how many traumatic
outcomes it has.

1330
01:04:56,369 --> 01:04:59,242
I love Brooke´s tone about it.

1331
01:04:59,242 --> 01:05:03,216
It´s like we´re moving forward
in life,

1332
01:05:03,216 --> 01:05:06,419
and now we get
to be on home plate,

1333
01:05:06,419 --> 01:05:11,184
in charge of our destinies
as adults.

1334
01:05:11,184 --> 01:05:13,587
But now we also get
to care for kids

1335
01:05:13,587 --> 01:05:16,529
and figure out
what that journey is.

1336
01:05:16,529 --> 01:05:18,662
-Literally cannot get
any better than that.

1337
01:05:18,662 --> 01:05:21,264
-Tell the group here about
what you´re working on.

1338
01:05:21,264 --> 01:05:23,597
-I just started my own company,

1339
01:05:23,597 --> 01:05:26,970
a very quickly growing platform
and website.

1340
01:05:26,970 --> 01:05:29,603
That´s my own brand
focused on well-being

1341
01:05:29,603 --> 01:05:33,046
for a community
that I really care about.

1342
01:05:33,046 --> 01:05:35,478
The more I started talking
to women over 40,

1343
01:05:35,478 --> 01:05:37,581
the more I started realizing

1344
01:05:37,581 --> 01:05:39,683
how many incredible pivots
there were.

1345
01:05:39,683 --> 01:05:46,459
Looking back, I believe I came
through it in spite of a lot,

1346
01:05:46,459 --> 01:05:50,363
you know, being reduced to this,
being reduced to that.

1347
01:05:50,363 --> 01:05:53,597
Many women feel that.

1348
01:05:53,597 --> 01:05:58,401
When that´s the culture that
my mother struggled with, too.

1349
01:06:00,533 --> 01:06:04,738
-I think everybody has a little,
like, Brooke Shields narrative

1350
01:06:04,738 --> 01:06:07,210
stuck in them,
because what happened to her

1351
01:06:07,210 --> 01:06:10,413
and the way people talked about
her and the perception of her

1352
01:06:10,413 --> 01:06:13,116
isn´t really about her
as an individual.

1353
01:06:13,116 --> 01:06:15,589
It´s just about women.

1354
01:06:15,589 --> 01:06:19,352
-I don´t see that
a lot has changed.

1355
01:06:19,352 --> 01:06:21,154
Young people
are just working so hard

1356
01:06:21,154 --> 01:06:24,598
to live up to these
unattainable standards.

1357
01:06:24,598 --> 01:06:27,661
They have to epitomize
a certain type of femininity

1358
01:06:27,661 --> 01:06:29,803
in order to be desirable to men.

1359
01:06:29,803 --> 01:06:33,807
Everything else is sort of
less valued, less important.

1360
01:06:33,807 --> 01:06:37,711
-Children are catapulted into
the world of adult sexuality

1361
01:06:37,711 --> 01:06:39,442
when they´re very, very young

1362
01:06:39,442 --> 01:06:42,175
by the kinds of images
on social media

1363
01:06:42,175 --> 01:06:46,820
and in films and all of that
long before they can process it.

1364
01:06:46,820 --> 01:06:51,324
How do you fight
a toxic cultural environment?

1365
01:06:51,324 --> 01:06:56,189
-Every generation of feminism
has multiple fights to have,

1366
01:06:56,189 --> 01:06:58,331
and this one continues.

1367
01:06:58,331 --> 01:07:00,794
[ Indistinct conversation ]

1368
01:07:04,738 --> 01:07:07,701
-It´s the first time
in about 56 years

1369
01:07:07,701 --> 01:07:12,375
that I´m actually just owning
my identity fully.

1370
01:07:15,348 --> 01:07:17,811
I had to go through
all of what I went through

1371
01:07:17,811 --> 01:07:21,655
to be able to really own
this period of time in my life.

1372
01:07:24,688 --> 01:07:27,721
I had to make it known
that Brooke Shields --

1373
01:07:27,721 --> 01:07:30,594
one word, the commodity --

1374
01:07:30,594 --> 01:07:35,128
that wasn´t who I was,

1375
01:07:35,128 --> 01:07:36,670
and to view that persona

1376
01:07:36,670 --> 01:07:39,232
as something
that´s just over there,

1377
01:07:39,232 --> 01:07:41,174
that´s not fully who you are.

1378
01:07:41,174 --> 01:07:43,607
It´s not gonna take
anything from you.

1379
01:07:43,607 --> 01:07:47,210
You inhabit it, but you leave it
and you come home.

1380
01:07:47,210 --> 01:07:55,118
♫♫

1381
01:07:55,118 --> 01:08:02,856
♫♫

1382
01:08:02,856 --> 01:08:10,764
♫♫

1383
01:08:13,366 --> 01:08:23,316
♫♫

1384
01:08:23,316 --> 01:08:33,286
♫♫

1385
01:08:33,286 --> 01:08:43,236
♫♫

1386
01:08:43,236 --> 01:08:53,206
♫♫

1387
01:08:53,206 --> 01:09:02,956
♫♫

1388
01:09:02,956 --> 01:09:12,896
♫♫

1389
01:09:12,896 --> 01:09:22,876
♫♫

1390
01:09:22,876 --> 01:09:32,816
♫♫

1391
01:09:32,816 --> 01:09:42,756
♫♫

1392
01:09:42,756 --> 01:09:52,736
♫♫

1393
01:09:52,736 --> 01:10:02,676
♫♫

1394
01:10:02,676 --> 01:10:12,656
♫♫

1395
01:10:12,656 --> 01:10:22,596
♫♫