So Zim? Zed?
Zafaria.
Right, right.
Super sexy name.
So where are we going?
You know, I didn't blow up your dms
for an early morning graveyard tour.
Not that I really mind that though.
Will you shut the fuck up.
I'm trying to think here.
Relax. I'm just fucking with you.
No worries, you know, knife scared me a little bit.
That and snakes.
I was with this crazy chick one time
she had snakes and one of them bit one of my nips.
Shh.
Love.
Relax.
If anything's going to bite you, it'll be me.
Now, be a good boy and follow me.
It won't be long before I make all of your
thick thighed goth girl dreams come true.
Hey man, it's Brody again.
Listen, I know I asked you the other day
for the STD force field,
when I hooked up with that sloppy chick from the bar,
but I kind of need another solid.
So if you could just make sure that this bomb ass sex
with this goth chick, does it lead to an early grave.
I'll totally owe you another one, man.
Thanks man.
You too.
Care to join me?
On my way.
Amen to that ass.
Hey, why'd you stop?
So, do you want me to strip down here or what?
Have you ever heard of Freddy Palmer?
No. Is that like an ex I should worry about?
No.
He was quite the legend among the locals here.
He was an Axe murderer
who some thought had supernatural powers.
He left a lot of bodies in his glorious wake.
He seemed unstoppable until...
He was stopped?
His end came at the sharp end of his very own axe,
clean through the neck, quote unquote,
smart people tried to bring him back
so that they could try to understand
his supernatural powers.
But the magic, the pure evil, was gone.
He was nothing more than a rotting stinking corpse.
They quietly buried him here, where we stand now.
Yeah. Cool story, bro.
So are we gonna just do it here or on the grave or what?
Oh.
Definitely.
Or what?
The fucking knife.
You stabbed me, you bitch.
That hurt.
And there's so much more pain to come.
Rise again my dark friends.
Rise and let your satanic hate and rage of hell's fire
burn inside your body again.
Rise Freddy Palmer, rise and kill again.
Woo.
All right guys, who's ready
to get hot witch summer started?
Was it your idea to come to the woods?
Fuck no.
You prudes, never listen to my ideas.
So this is all thanks to Queen Bellatrix.
I just thought it was gonna be nice
to get out and enjoy nature.
My love, all you've been doing lately
is sitting in your little dark corner
listening to crime podcasts and knitting socks for cats.
I was just a little bit worried.
You know, I most prefer murder and kittens
to all this light and noise.
And don't even get me started on the beach.
Oh, are you aware that I'm more worried about Kali?
I mean, look at her.
Her state of mind is really scaring me right now.
We should have gone to his house, killed him,
and we could be burying his body right now.
Not frolicking at the beach.
Well, you know what they say about hindsight,
but we can shove that idea for right now.
Kali what are you doing?
There is no service in this He cat ate forsaken place.
Well, obviously.
Do you wanna get down before you dent my car?
Yeah. Sorry, Bellatrix.
Be careful.
Here, let me try.
Okay.
Why? Come on. No, come on.
Why? What do you mean, why?
- How long has it been? - Since what?
Since you spoke with him.
Two weeks.
Two weeks since I caught him
with that harlot, whore, slut, hussy, Sable.
He has not reached out to me since.
I'm sorry, Kali, but he's not going to.
He's just a raging erection
running after the next hole he can find.
So can we just relax, commune with mother nature,
drink some wine,
and not talk about filthy fuckboy, right now?
Okay.
Yeah. For you.
We might as well enjoy this place while we're here.
See that's what I'm talking about, see?
Okay. Yeah.
And if this doesn't work out,
I'm pretty sure Ember wouldn't mind killing him
and burying him out here somewhere.
- Okay. - So we're good?
- Yeah. Okay. - Okay, good.
All right, well let's go then.
You guys, it is hot out here.
Are we ready to raise some hell?
Yeah.
Woo.
Woo. Okay.
Freddy Palmer in the flesh.
Use my body to keep you alive.
Yes.
Take me.
I'm all yours.
Promise it's not much farther.
See, we have arrived.
Finally.
Nobody told me we had cross the plane to Hades
to get here though.
- All right. Come on Ember. - Such a baby.
- That's a lot of drama. - It was not that bad.
I kinda liked it.
Thank you.
And I did wanna say thank you to you guys too.
This was exactly what I needed.
Time away from that shitty ex and a shittier ex best friend.
I feel like I can actually,
Like commune with nature and get closer to my inner goddess,
and I'm gonna find some peace.
And I won't have to think about that shitty scumbag.
Guys?
Isn't that Corbin over there?
Yep, that is, that is him.
What the fuck is he doing here?
I'm sorry guys, I don't know if he's seen us,
so why don't we just...
Oh, he's definitely seen us.
Okay. Okay.
Maybe if we're really still, he can't see us.
He's not a T-Rex.
Okay. Actually, fun fact, the movie got it wrong.
They can see really well.
Ladies, please.
I say we just slowly and quietly
walk backwards until we get to the car.
No, he definitely sees us.
What is he doing?
He's waving us over.
Well, maybe there's someone else behind us that he knows.
I know there's nobody else behind us.
I was just trying to be funny.
Kali.
Oh. What do I do?
I say, we go over there and gun him like the prick he is.
Ember, put that away.
Kali, if you want, we can just go.
You don't have to deal with him.
You know what? No. No.
He is done controlling my actions.
So we can go over there and we can get this over with.
- Okay. - Well, let's go.
Okay. Okay.
My dear Kali, how long has it been?
It seems like a lifetime since I saw you last.
Time hasn't been very good to you, has it?
Two weeks.
Oh, is that all?
Two weeks since I caught you doing disgusting things
to my former best friend?
Oh, Kali, are you still not over that little nonsense?
A little nonsense?
Are you fucking kidding me Corbin?
Kali, you know me.
Things just sort of happen around me.
You didn't think I would stay faithful forever, did you?
I mean look at me.
You know I'm a very good,
lover.
I'm sure you remember all of our sexual romps
in the bedroom,
the kitchen,
the shower.
Ooh. And the jacuzzi.
I'm sure that I ranked number one in your heart
and loins.
Those delicious loins, how they used to tremble for me.
Is this vampire wanna be for real?
Lord Corbin is always real.
Hmm.
And Lord Corbin definitely has enough
to go around to all you tasty vixens.
All right, this guy's chum.
Oh, no, no, no, no. Nope.
He is not worth your time or prison.
I'm sensing a lot of hostility.
Kali, what's wrong with your friends?
Do they not like the type of plumbing
that Lord Corbin has to offer?
Are they fish eaters?
Oh no, you didn't.
You better get ready to see a gothic chick
turn gangster bitch that's for sure.
Oh hell no - Oh no Lord Corbin
- has no problem. - No, I got a problem
- with you, that's for damn sure. - If you only love the women
in your circle - Oh no my circle.
- Oh no, Hell no. - Lord Corbin loves all.
Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
Just, Bellatrix, just give me a minute
to talk to this poser.
Oh, and you brought her with you.
I'm gonna puke.
Kali, you remember your former best friend
who you introduced me to,
who I later had sex with,
who you later caught me having said sex with?
What the fuck are you doing here anyway?
I mean, stalker much.
I cannot believe you brought her here.
Of course I did. Why wouldn't I?
I also brought my new friend Ben.
Hi. Ben.
Ben Benson.
How do you know that guy?
I met him a few days ago.
I was choking on a very big peanut.
Penis.
And he Heimliched me.
What a terrible fucking shame.
Kali, you just, you need to grow up
and get the fuck out of here
because honestly, we were here first.
Oh, Sable actually about that.
I'm not fucking taking orders
from a disgusting, backstabbing friend.
Former friend. Thank you.
What the fuck did I ever do to you?
Kali, honey.
This isn't about you.
You just have to realize
that you're nothing but yesterday's news.
Okay. All right. You're dead.
You're fucking dead, you're fucking dead.
I'm fucking done with this.
Oh you bitch.
Oh you almighty dictator, I've had enough of you.
You ruined my fucking life, you ruined everything.
You ruined everything you fucking.
Ladies enough.
This is no way to behave.
This is not love.
This is pettiness.
And I hate pettiness.
Hate her instead, she started it.
Here love, clear the hate from your soul.
Breathe with me,
in
Out,
in
And out
there.
Do you feel better?
Yes. My Lord.
Give me a fucking break.
So I suppose a truce is outta the question then?
I think that's for the best.
I mean, we're all adults here.
We don't need to act this way.
Exactly. This beach is big enough for the all of us.
We can go back to where we came from.
And you can set your circle over there.
Is that good for everybody?
I think that works.
Oh, just one last thing Sable,
you might wanna go back to whatever strip mall,
back alley salon you go to,
your roots are kind of showing.
Get down.
Oh, sorry, baby.
You know, you gotta stop forgetting in your place.
Gee baby, I'm sorry, I don't know why I can't remember.
I mean it, it's getting pretty fucking annoying.
I keep telling you and you just don't get it.
You're my woman, you have to follow my lead,
especially on the bike.
Please, babe, don't yell at me again.
I don't know why, but I just can't stay mad at you.
Oh, that's it?
I'm thirsty, go find me a drink.
Where?
In there, what would they have in there?
Maybe there's some lemonade and maybe a bed.
Oh, now we're talking.
You coming?
No, go on, I need to take a leak.
But I don't wanna go in there alone.
Just go get me some damn lemonade.
What a idiot.
Oh God. I'm not done yet.
They didn't have any lemonade, but.
Oh that's dark.
Kali?
Kali don't be sad.
They're all the way over there and we're here.
So just try to have fun.
Yeah, I know that,
but just feels like it's a black cloud over our fun.
Well, when the clouds are black, it usually rains,
and when it rains it pours.
Okay, that'll definitely help.
Oh God.
Woo. Come on.
- Drink, drink, drink. - No, no, no.
Come on Olivia, your turn, drink.
Right now that beautiful body of water over there
needs this beautiful body in it.
Well suit yourself love.
Better hurry up back,
because we are gonna drink this all without you then.
Without question.
Oh. To be so carefree.
Don't worry Kali, we'll get you there.
- Kali. Kali. - Kali. Kali.
Come on that I was like a baby sip.
Don't be a pussy.
That's disgusting.
It is a little gross.
But we need, oh.
I still can't believe this.
Who does she think she is?
I bet she knew you'd be here.
And this is just one big plan to ruin everything for us.
Like you did for her?
Shut the fuck up, Ben.
You don't know what you're talking about.
God, for all I know, you were in on this with her.
Like, this was supposed to be
my day with my man.
And then like, here you are.
What the fuck?
Sable, please.
I owe this man everything.
Everything.
When that big, huge, peanut lodged itself
deep down into my throat cavity.
I know.
That could have been the end of me.
I could have been a goner.
I saw the tunnel of white light
and this man brought me back.
The very least that I could do
is bring him to the beach.
Thanks.
No, Ben.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
Now can we all just have a nice, peaceful time?
No, it's just so annoying though.
Like what part of I'm with Sable now,
does she not understand?
And like how could you even be with her for so long?
And look at those freaks she was with.
Who could even be friends with them?
Wait, where honey, where are you going?
I grew bored of this.
You say you want her to move on, you should too.
Wait. No, no, no, don't go.
Wait I'm sorry.
I'll forget all about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What's up you freaky deaky people.
We have a good one for you today,
Freddy fucking Palmer.
This guy was fucking crazy, man.
So many bodies, thanks to him.
We'll get to all that later
because we have a special treat for you.
We're able to track down his final resting place.
We went there and snooped around and boy, was it crazy.
That's right you little sickos.
Freddy Palmer's grave is right here under our noses
and buried right in Forest Green Cemetery.
When we come back, you'll be walking right with us
as we investigate that creepy, creepy place.
Holy fuck.
Ember, my love.
I know you don't like the sun, but I like the sun.
And you're blocking my sun.
Did we or did we not pass the cemetery on the way here?
I think so. Why?
Do you remember what it was called?
I don't know, I really wasn't paying attention.
Kali, Kali, did you notice?
Yeah, I looked quick.
I think it was like forest law...
Forest green?
Yeah. That was it.
Fucking awesome.
Why are you so excited?
They found it.
Found what?
Freddy fucking Palmer.
Jesus.
No. No way.
They don't even know what happened to him.
They do now.
That's insane.
No, that's fucking sick.
And you're saying that they found him
in a cemetery down the road?
And you want to go and see it?
Please.
We can make it sexy.
Anything for you.
I'd invite you, but might get a little sexy.
Yuck.
That's okay, I'm feeling the beach.
Plus, I wanna be here when Olivia gets back
because she will absolutely freak if we're all gone.
Okay. I can change my clothes.
Where are you going?
To change, this isn't cemetery attire.
Listen, this stuff's best done in the nude.
- But... - She's not wrong.
Okay. Okay. Lead the way.
Oh. Oh my God.
Stop.
Oh my God Corbin, what are you doing?
Ew.
Oh my God Corbin.
Why would we just leave?
I mean, seriously make her leave.
I'm so sick of looking over there and seeing her
and don't even get me started on Ben.
Sable?
Please.
Enough.
Seriously, she's over there.
We are right here, right?
And since we're right here,
let's say you and I do something
to take your mind off of everything but me.
What do you have in mind, My Lord?
Well, I say we start like that.
Any objections?
Never, My Lord.
Yes. My Lord.
Yes. Yes.
- Yes, my Lord. - Oh yeah.
If it's really here, I'm gonna freak the fuck out.
They say he was supernatural.
They say he was still killing people
once his head was cut off.
Well, this is cemetery anyway.
Can't you just be excited for me?
This is why I exist.
I know you do.
Forgive me my love.
But I love that this is making you so excited.
It's definitely very sexy.
Oh, the body's making you stiff?
Like a fucking raging fire.
Oh my gosh.
You know, mommy's in charge.
- Who's are these? - Yours.
No, no.
No.
Hello.
Hi, I'm Kali.
Yeah, I know. I heard.
Everything all right?
I'm not sure.
My friends all went and did their own thing,
but it's been a really long time and nobody's back yet.
So that's not right.
Olivia went out for a swim
and there's no way she's still out there.
Yeah. Corbin and Sable have been gone a long time too.
Well, that's weird for Corbin.
But Sable is weird, so I guess kinda normal for her.
Sable is something.
Yeah, they're pretty much perfect for each other.
So I'm just glad you don't call him Lord too.
- Did you ever? - Fuck no.
Good.
What do you say we go and find them all.
Yeah. If you wouldn't mind,
I'm just gonna throw something on.
I don't mind, it's about time I did something.
Hmm. Another amazing performance.
I really am a Lord.
Oh, you know it, baby.
Lord, baby.
Your thinking about Kali, aren't you?
Ex fucking cuse me?
I know you are.
Seeing her here has to remind you
of all the time you spent with her, don't deny it.
The only thing I can't deny is how ridiculous you are.
Stop being so petty and living in the past.
I can't help it.
Well, I can and do.
And right now my future doesn't have you in it.
Are you seriously breaking up with me right now?
Without question.
There are others.
There will always be others.
Maybe one of Kali's friends
would like a big fix slice of Corbin cake.
Oh, real nice.
Oh, go on, get outta here.
Motherfucker, I got you, I could get another.
Oh hell no. Uhuh, you made your choice.
You know what, maybe Ben would like a night with me instead.
So it's like really annoying
because Corbin is a absolutely huge douche bag,
but he still really broke my heart.
And today, like me and the girls,
we were just vibing and I really was feeling better.
But then they all left to do their own thing.
And I know I could have gone with either of them,
but I would've been a total third wheel, so I didn't.
So basically this whole thing is my fault.
What do you think?
Right.
Okay, let's keep looking.
Great.
Oh, hey guys.
Ben, making your move already, are you?
And there's a good spot back there.
Oh, ew.
Corbin, can you think of nothing else?
Mm, I try not to.
Where's everyone else?
That's why we're out here.
Where's Sable?
Back at the spot I just mentioned.
Okay. Corbin, why aren't you back at the spot
you just mentioned?
Oh, Sable and I are a thing of the past,
which means Kali dear.
I am back on the market, if you would like another go.
No, actually I'd really like to find my friends
and get out of here and get as far away from you
as possible.
Oh, Kali, Kali, Kali.
You seem so stressed.
What say you and I do a little yoga.
I promise that'll be all.
Ew, Corbin. No, no.
Your downward dog is stiff, you can't even do yoga.
Also, I hate you.
I'm finding my friends, I'm leaving. Goodbye.
Aw, your loss.
Hmm. Watch your step, Ben.
You're in dangerous territory.
Promise?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You're gonna be okay.
Is it a fucking prank?
I'd ask you for help, but I see you're stuck here too.
What the fuck is happening?
One of us is gonna die, what do you think?
No, no please, no.
Take her please.
- No. - Take her, not me.
- Leave me in peace. - What?
Please take her instead.
Are you a fucking lunatic?
Please take her.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
She's the one you want.
Fuck you bitch.
Put that axe in her.
No, no please don't.
Please don't.
No please no.
No. No.
Fuck you bitch, your next.
I'm just sitting there at this gas station, right?
And out comes this weird goth guy
with a bag of nuts in his hand.
I laugh of course, about the whole bag of nuts thing.
He rips it open, pours 'em all down his throat,
and he starts to choke.
Without thinking, I stood up, I gave him the Heimlich.
Never done it before, I'm not really hero material,
but here we are.
So why are you still hanging out with them?
He was really appreciative, you know,
like really appreciative,
like grinding up on me, appreciative, you know.
He said he was coming here and he was gonna pick up his girl
and actually come with and have some fun.
Complete with the air quotes with them.
Oh, so that's the reason you're here.
That's gross.
Originally, yes and it is gross.
But I saw the way they were treating you, so I checked out.
Oh, thank you so much.
That's still gross.
Well notice I'm helping you and not him.
Sure. I guess, fine.
Redemption, baby steps.
But I just really hope we find them soon
cause this is actually getting scary.
We will, I'm sure.
Ember.
Sable.
Bellatrix.
- What are the other names? - Olivia.
Olivia.
Jesus.
- What the fuck? - Bellatrix.
Ember dead.
What?
We went to that place that she wanted to go
and everything was fine.
And then this guy came outta nowhere and he killed her
and he tried to kill me.
Really?
Bellatrix are you serious?
Do you think I did this to myself?
He killed her and he used her parts to try to...
What do you mean her body parts?
He cut, he pulled out
and he tried to strangle me with her intestines.
Oh my God.
We need to find him and we need to make him pay.
No fucking way.
What we need to do is get the outta here
and call on the people equipped to handle this.
Oh no. He needs to know that he messed
with the wrong witch.
You know what, I think she's right.
Kali, please, please just listen to yourself.
Okay, if what she says is true and it looks like it is,
then there's a mass murderer in these woods killing people.
Now in the movies that are like that,
there's always a group of people
that have to go find the killer and get revenge.
And all that happens is they get added to the kill count.
Now, I'm sorry about your friend, I really am.
But all we are a bunch of weirdos in the woods. Okay?
We have to go and call on the people
that are equipped to handle this.
But.
We have to do something.
Look, I know this is hard, I know,
but all we can find are rocks and sticks.
Now you saw him, do you think rocks and sticks
are gonna do the job?
No.
All right. Fine.
We'll just go, we'll find Olivia and Corbin and Sable
and we'll get out of here.
We'll go to the car and we'll tear our ass outta here
and we'll call in the professionals, okay?
- Okay. - Good.
I think I remember the way back.
Me too.
And if worse comes to worst,
I can sniff out Corbin's cheap cologne.
What?
Hey.
Hey, are you okay?
Oh God.
Fuck.
Oh God.
Sorry.
No, no, no.
Oh my God.
Fucking hell.
I didn't do it.
She was like this, I found her already.
- We know. - Okay.
Wait, you already know?
She's not the only one.
Bellatrix here said that her girlfriend got it too.
Ember. Her name was Ember.
And she wasn't just my girlfriend,
she was the love of my life, she was my everything.
Can any of you say that about anybody?
I thought so once.
Unfortunately, no.
Then you can never understand.
She was a beacon.
She was a light that shines so bright
not even the sun could compare.
And that light was snuffed out while I held her in my hands.
My soul is going black.
And so will his.
What is she talking about?
Ember loved true crime podcasts
and she found out Freddy Palmer's grave was around here.
So they went looking for the grave,
but found a lot more than that.
He killed her and he killed Olivia
and he tried to kill me.
But you know what, he failed and I'm gonna kill him.
Okay, well if that's true.
And it looks like it is,
then we need to get the fuck out of Dodge.
Sable hasn't come back yet?
Oh, no. Sable.
Nope and she probably isn't.
Well, we need to look for her.
I don't think I can handle another dead friend.
Listen, I guarantee she's already dead.
So anyway, this Frankie guy...
Ah Freddy.
Yes, Freddy Palmer.
He sounds like he doesn't leave any loose ends.
So we need to go.
What happened to you Corbin?
You used to give a shit about people.
Now, urg, look at you.
I stopped caring about people
when people stopped caring about me.
Why do you even care after what she did to you?
After what you made her do more like, I see you now.
You are nothing but a coward
that ruins everyone else's lives.
We are gonna look for her and then we're gonna leave.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
We're not getting anywhere like this.
Why can't we just do both, okay?
Corbin, the coward and I will get to the car
and you guys will go a little ways,
literally just a little ways to find Sable.
We'll get the car and come back for you.
Yeah. Yeah.
Let's kill that fucker.
Come on, Kali.
I don't know, I don't know that I trust Corbin
not to just drive off and leave us here.
That's what I'm for.
Keys?
- Keys? - Fine.
Good.
Now you have my word, we'll go to the car and come back.
Do I have your word that you won't go too far?
Fine.
Kali?
Yeah. And if I see any fucked up shit,
I'll fuck that shit up.
No, no, no, no, no.
If you see any fucked up shit,
you will hide from said fucked up shit, okay?
Now be carefully vigilant, okay?
Ready?
Yeah, let's go.
- Sable. - Stupid girl.
Sorry.
Sable.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Maybe we shouldn't be yelling like that.
I mean, that isn't exactly being carefully vigilant.
Wow. Yeah.
Who talks like that anyways though?
Yes.
Yes motherfucker.
Okay. Okay, okay.
Yes.
Okay.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Fuck.
Yes, yes.
Yes motherfucker.
Alright. Alright.
Oh fuck.
So, carefully vigilant?
- Oh, I know. - Really?
I know, it was stupid, okay, I know, all right.
I was going for the whole guy who's calm and collected
and can get outta any situation thing.
Yeah. Didn't work.
I know, all right?
I know it didn't.
And they're probably back there laughing about it right now.
Damn straight.
Son of a bitch.
What?
If I had this earlier,
I could have gone after that fucker.
Whatever you say there Ninja Master.
Ben?
Use the fucking sword.
Fuck this shit.
Why do I have to die?
Is that the fucked up shit you mentioned?
Yeah. That's why we're hiding.
Corbin?
Whoa.
Where's the other guy?
His name's Ben.
Where's Ben?
The guy, the dude.
He cut, he got gut by the gutter.
God, poor Ben.
Where'd you get the sword?
Oh, I got it outta my car.
You had a sword in your car and you couldn't save Ben?
Hey, I fought, I couldn't do anything,
so my save my ass plan kicked in.
Yeah, I'm sure you fought.
Look, I'm not really built to fight.
I mean, look at me.
Oh my God, Corbin, you are seriously the worst.
Yeah. Which he said.
Well, where are you going?
To kill him.
I mean, I have this now.
Well, Bellatrix, I don't think that's gonna be enough.
Maybe.
But at least I can create a diversion
so you can help find stupid girl, if she's alive.
You know, she's right.
Let her do her thing.
Yeah. Corbin, you would say that.
Listen, I know I'm a scumbag
and that you hate me,
but if you really wanna go save Sable,
which I think is a really bad idea,
we should just let her go do her thing
and we can go find Sable.
Are you a hundred percent sure?
More like 10.
But I have to try, for Ember, for Olivia.
For Ember, for Olivia, and for He cat ate.
For He cat ate.
Okay. Now that she's gone, let's get the fuck outta here.
What?
That save my ass plan I was talking about,
I still have it, you're a part of it now.
Let's go.
Corbin. No, get your fucking hand off me.
Now.
Corbin, I don't know what the fuck happened to you.
You used to be so sweet and so selfless
and I don't know if you read a book or watched a movie
or got real deep into douche bag, TikTok or something,
but this version of Corbin is the actual worst.
Oh, come on, don't you know that you tried controlling me
in our relationship and I fucking let you
and you use women for some weird personal conquest.
You did it to me, you did it to Sable
and God knows how many other women.
That's not even the worst part,
the actual worst part of you, Corbin,
the worst part is that when it's time for you
to do anything meaningful, anything important,
anything helpful, you melt and you cower
and you run the fuck away.
That's done now, I'm going to look for Sable with you
or without you.
So you can decide if you're going to nut up
or if you're going to run away again,
like the spineless worm that you are.
Oh. That is fucking typical.
Get outta my way.
Freddy.
Freddy fucking Palmer.
Show yourself.
Today, you die.
And forever this time.
You killed the love of my life and my friend.
You are done, you are so fucking done.
No.
No, not like this. No.
Ooh, chainsaw massacre much.
Wait, no, Kali,
I don't think we're gonna find anything good in there.
Corbin, what part of search everywhere
do you not understand?
Oh. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're right, you did three minutes of the right thing.
So now it's about time for you to run away again.
You know, everyone seems to die while you're away.
So if I didn't know any better
and know that you were a coward, I might think it was you.
You know what, I'm done.
Like done, done.
I tried to make you see reason,
but you just wanna be the hero.
I keep leaving because I seem to be the only smart one here.
But you know what, self preservation is from now on.
I'm not dying for you or that stupid hoe
that I used to make you jealous.
You know what, Corbin?
Yeah, I agree with you.
I think you should leave.
I think you should fucking leave right the fuck now.
And if I see you again, I'll be the one to kill you.
You know why you are so fucking stupid.
Have fun dying.
Kali?
He got you too?
No, I'm here to get you.
Oh, I'm glad you're still alive.
Wait, wait, wait, you came to save me?
Yeah. Well, listen even through everything,
but you have to know what's going on out there.
That guy who took you has killed all of my friends
and that Ben guy.
Corbin?
I don't know.
He keeps running away multiple times.
He comes back and then he acts like he's gonna help
and then he fucking runs away again.
That sounds right.
Listen, I am so sorry.
I never meant to hurt you.
He just made me look so overboard with it.
I figured, he's like that.
For whatever reason, we fall under his weird ass spell.
Right?
But listen, as long as neither of us go back to him,
we should be good.
Are we good?
Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah.
Yeah. We're good.
- Okay. - Yeah.
Come here.
Okay. All right.
Can you get out of here with that?
Oh God. I should be, I can hardly feel it.
- Okay. Come on. - Okay.
Okay. You know what?
Maybe we can take him, there's two of us, so.
Do you see him?
I don't think seven of us could take him.
Okay. Well then let's figure something else out.
'Cause I don't think we're getting away from this fucker.
Maybe Corbin will grace us with one of his heroic returns.
I wouldn't hold your breath.
Well, we're both already,
what can we even do?
Two kicks to the balls, that should work.
Do his balls even work?
Yes. He did some weird sexual stuff
to what's her name in there?
Oh.
Hey stop right there, Mr.
We are trying to figure out a way to kill you.
Kali?
Yeah.
You are, God, you're such a better friend
than I could ever be.
Thank you Sable that really needs a lot.
No, no, no, no.
Sable you fucking bitch.
Eat metal you fuck.
I did it.
I fucking did it.
I did it.
I killed him.
Kali.
No get the fuck away from me.
Kali.
What the fuck?
Kali?
Kali, please.
Sable, what the fuck?
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry I used you as a distraction like that,
but I thought the chainsaw would start before he hurt.
Yeah, tell that to my fucking face Sable. Jesus.
Look, I'm really sorry all your friends died.
God that fucking sucked.
This whole fucking day has fucking sucked
but Sable that really, really fucking sucked.
I know. I know.
Too well.
Woo.
Yeah, I knew we'd get that motherfuker.
Oh, we are the goddamn dream team, yo.
Well, here we go again.
I say we blow this Popsicle stand and party.
Corbin.
Lord.
I say we make this three way official.
A little rough, don't you think?
Here? Now?
Okay.
Whoa, what is happening?
Whoa, what are you doing?
Stop fucking around.
No more fucking.
And no more you running off
after we've done all the fun stuff.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yes. Yes.
You know what?
He deserved worse.
So much worse.
Fucking Lord my ass.
Ready?
Yeah.
Finally.