[birds chirping]
[evil laughter]
WOMAN: [British accent] What if you put 10 of
reality television’s most iconi and infamous supervillains
under one roof...
You know me from "The Bachelor."
-"The Challenge." -"Survivor."
-"Vanderpump Rules." -"Flavor of Love."
Google me.
...where they must outsmart...
[distorted voice]
Out-manipulate...
I didn’t ----ing write...
Hello!
Who wrote this note?!
...and out-scheme each other...
I don’t mind putting him up, but will you guys have my back?
Aah!
...through a series of challenges.
Guys, this is harder than what I thought.
I’m out for 200 grand. I need the money,
so this is war.
-It’s raining balls! -[cheering]
I consider myself the greatest villain
in the history of reality television.
-Aah! Sorry! -What are you doing, bro?!
You know exactly what you’re doing, man.
-I did not! -Did you sabotage?
I did not.
Oh, yeah, I-I sabotaged.
If something’s fallin’, give it a push.
-[laughs] -Oh! Oh!
I’m out! Now I’m going home.
I’m going to [bleep] him up!
Bobby!
They must stave off elimination...
You going down before I do, you amphibian mother----er.
...in order to win a $200,000 cash prize...
-You’re a brainless little pawn! -[bleep] you!
You’re a ----ing slithery, slimy snake.
...and the title of America’s ultimate supervillain
I don’t stab in the back.
-What the [bleep] you call this? -I stab in the front.
Bitch, I’m scared.
[evil laughter]
[bell tolling]
♪
Coming in hot.
♪
-Whoo! Sorry. Let me start over. -[music winds down]
You may remember me-- Sorry, that didn’t feel natural.
♪
[conch shell blows]
-Is that the money shot? -CREW: Money shot.
People describe me as
the greatest reality television bad guy of all time.
When "Survivor" aired,
30 million people knew the name "Jonny Fairplay."
I’m famous for the dead grandma lie.
My grandmother’s sitting at home
watching "Jerry Springer" right now.
Wow, what a crib.
♪
Not a bad spread.
I mean, who doesn’t like a beautiful chandelier?
Hey, we got a pool.
Okay. Three to a room.
Two to a room.
One, two, three.
We’re up to eight.
And one, two.
It looks like 10 is the magic number.
♪
Am I first? Oh, they saved the best for first.
This is great!
I didn’t expect to be the first one in, but thank you.
I feel like that’s the sweetest love letter
I’ve ever gotten from reality television.
First in means you’re number one...in my mind.
♪
Ooh, someone’s coming.
♪
My first victim.
♪
[singsongy] The original HBIC is here, bitches.
♪
-Well, hello. -Well, hello to you.
If I had to guess someone that would be here,
New York would be at the top of my list.
All of my friends that know me
tell me that I remind them of Beyoncé.
Beyoncé?! Beyoncé?!
You know who you really look like?
You ----ing look like Luther Vandross.
[hysterical laughter]
I’ve never been one for labels other than skinny.
You can call me that.
But if we’re talking villains,
who are you gonna get that’s gonna be able to go
toe to toe with Tiffany "New York" Pollard?
Jonny Fairplay.
Jonny, New York is in the mother----ing house.
What’s up, New York?
-You look beautiful. -I know I do.
Jonny Fairplay seems very, very friendly.
He knows who I am. I’m not surprised by that.
How long you been here, Jonny?
Uh, a few minutes. I took the tour.
I did not. I didn’t know who he was.
Okay.
♪
[zips loudly]
To villains.
-To villains and to alliances. -Oh, I like it.
♪
Oh, I know this guy. [laughs]
♪
I love your nails. I was gonna get
the same thing done, but I didn’t.
-[laughs] -What’s up, man?
-Good to meet you, man.
Johnny Bananas is the second most famous Jonny
in the history of reality television.
-Big Banana or Johnny Bananas? -I’ve never been
called "Big Banana" before. -Good.
I’ve done 21 seasons of MTV’s "The Challenge."
♪
-There you go, Johnny! -[cheering]
You got this!
I’m known for being mischievous, a pot stirrer,
an antagonist.
This is pretty dope with the ----ing spaceman.
-Yeah. -It’s gonna be me right here.
♪
It could either go very well, or I could go down in flames.
Banana flambé.
[singsongy] Here we go.
NEW YORK: Uh-oh.
Well, well, well.
-JONNY: Hello! -NEW YORK: Cool!
It’s like a flock of doves fly into the house.
[wings flapping]
[sexy music playing]
♪
-Welcome. -Hi!
-NEW YORK: How you doing? -Good. How are you?
-And you are? -I’m Corinne.
You know me from "The Bachelor."
♪
No one liked me in the beginning ’cause
I was the first to kiss him in the house.
I mean, I go after what I want.
Excuse me, sir. Can you get my bag?
Yeah, I would love to.
What the hell did you pack in here, rocks?
[Corinne laughs]
♪
Mmm.
[indistinct conversations in distance]
My...type of place.
♪
-[thunderclap] -[laughs]
This is quite fitting for a villain like me. I like it.
If I had to compare myself to a villain,
it would be Maleficent.
Something about that purple eyeshadow,
the wet black looks and latex
that really just speaks to my Scorpio soul.
You wanna sleep in a room with Johnny Bananas?
I know, but I kinda wanna sleep in the room with you, too.
The color of this room is gonna make me happy when I wake up.
Your name ain’t Caramel, right? I’m sorry.
-[laughs] -All right...
-It’s Corinne. -Yoo-hoo!
Who are these people?
-These stairs. -Wait. Whose bag is that?
-Hi. -Oh!
-Oh, my God! -There she is!
-Wait a minute! -Bobby!
-Bobby, wait a minute now! -New York?!
I cannot believe I’m meeting one of my idols right now.
Like, what?!
-Is this for real right now? -Yeah, yeah, we doing this.
She doesn’t take any sh--. New York is an OG.
I’m familiar with you.
I’m just misunderstood.
Everyone’s gonna come here with that goddamn line.
-Listen-- -"Misunderstood."
We’re all here for a reason, bro, all right?
-Well, listen-- -You can’t make an omelet
without breaking a few ----ing eggs, right? So...
Ohh!
Well, no, listen, I’m-a be flat out honest.
I am a villain, but...I’m a fun villain.
-Yeah. -You know what I’m saying?
-Yes, you are fun. -We got to own it.
I say everything that a person is thinking,
and I’m always finding myself in sticky situations.
-[singsongy] Extra, extra... -What the [bleep] extra [bleep]?
Read all about it!
’Cause you do the same-- You do the same thing, like--
[bleep]! Get the [bleep] outta here!
I’m very opinionated, and I’m not afraid to speak my truth.
Let’s just cut the sh--. We’re all here for one purpose.
-Okay. -What’s that?
-The money. -[cash register bell dings]
[doorbell rings]
Oh, sh--!
Oh, not you! Unh-unh! Get out!
No, I don’t want him in here!
♪
Oh, no. Anybody but this man.
[laughs]
When I say that this man is the male version of myself,
I’m lying. He’s worse!
You are so mean!
-Introduce yourself. -Come on, come on.
Do you like working out?
Yeah. Not a huge fan.
-Really? -Yeah.
I get along best with individuals
that do work out.
Do you like being on a guy’s shoulders?
You’re up for the challenge? You can pick me up.
Yeah. Will I have trouble picking you up?
♪
He is so mean.
Bitch, he better not be mean to me.
♪
Do it, do it.
-All right, boys. -Cheers.
-Hi! -Hello.
-Welcome. -Tanisha. Nice to meet you.
You’re "Bad Girls Club"?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, a long time ago.
♪
I don’t really need no introduction,
but I’ll give it to ’em, sh--.
They know who I am. They know me.
[chanting] ♪ I didn’t get no ----ing sleep ’cause of y’all ♪
♪ Y’all not gon’ get no sleep ’cause of me ♪
I have no idea what’s ahead,
but in the words of Denzel Washington,
oh, I’m leaving with something.
-And you were on... -"Survivor."
-"Survivor." Ooh! -Long, long, long time ago.
Who’s that making all this noise in my goddamn house?
BOTH: Ohh!
-Holy sh--. Not Tanisha. -Bobby!
I know Bobby from "Love & Hip Hop"
and following him on Instagram.
[cat meows]
I don’t know what’s gon’ happen! [laughs]
♪
Ooh, here come another villain!
-Oh, sh--! -Who’s that?
♪
-Hi! -What’s up?
Everyone, make it really awkward!
[cheering]
♪
-I need a drink. -Yeah, Jax.
-Jax. -How you doing?
Hi, I’m Jax Taylor, and I’m happy to be here.
-"Vanderpump Rules"? -Yes.
Is that--okay.
-This man that just walked in? -Mm-hmm.
-No, for real? -I’ll tell you later.
I’m known as a villain because I did
a lot of pretty messed up, douchey things in my past.
-Go-- -Be a good boy, old man.
I’m about to drop my ----ing fist in your ----ing face.
I look back on that person that I used to be,
and I don’t want anything to do with him.
You drink champagne, or you like real liquor?
I’m just drinking anything that has alcohol.
-I’ll have a glass of alcohol. -No, no. [bleep]
It’s extremely important to win the money.
I have a family. I have a kid to put through school.
Who knew being bad was-- was gonna pay off?
♪
-Oh! -Hey!
Come on in.
♪
Wait a minute. Is that--
-Yo, from, uh, "90 Day Fiancé"! -Yeah.
I want to win this money, and if you know anything about me...
Bring me my red bag with my makeup!
...you know it’s gonna happen. [laughs]
-Hell, yeah! What’s up?! -Oh!
-Yeah! Hell, yeah! -I called it.
Just when I thought there could not be
any more forbidden fruit in this house...
♪
[sexy music playing]
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
If you were to love at first sight, I believe in it.
♪
[music winds down]
[crow cawing]
♪
We’ve been in the house five minutes,
and I’ve already fallen in love twice.
I’m an ass and feet person.
-My God, you will love my toes. -Oh.
Maybe three times.
Oh, my God. Listen, my goal
was not to come here and turn and turn straight men gay.
-My goal-- -Too late!
-You wanna go see the rooms? -Yes.
♪
I’m just happy there’s a bathroom.
♪
We can do, like, half-half, yeah.
-Boom. Right? High five. -Okay, high five.
[suspenseful music plays]
Is that our last guest?
-Oh, boy. -Over here.
♪
-Is the last person here? -Last person, yeah.
♪
-That’s Omarosa. -No, it’s not.
-That is Omarosa.
♪
Omarosa’s coming.
♪
[singsongy] Hello?
[voice echoing] Hello?
Hello?
♪
Hey. Is there somebody new in here?
-Hi. -Hi.
Why is everybody so scared of you?
-Of me? -Yeah.
-What’s your name? -I’m Shake.
Hi, Shake. I’m Omarosa.
"Amarosa." That’s what they all said.
-It’s Omarosa. -Omarosa.
With an "O."
Hi.
Come through, eyebrows.
That’s the first thing you notice on me? Not my pumps?
-Jonny! -Girl!
Oh, my God.
-We started together. -We did.
We--We created this villain sh--.
[laughs]
♪
CORINNE: [gasps] It’s someone new!
-Hi! What’s your name? -Nice to meet you.
Um, Google. It’ll help you.
-Ohh! -With--with that being said,
let me go, uh, I just gotta--
There’s some libations and snacks.
What...the [bleep]?
I’m sorry, what?
Things over here in the corner that...
So, let’s finish talking.
Omarosa’s Omarosa. [laughs]
Omarosa don’t change.
Oh, I don’t know. I’m kinda scared now.
Oh, my God.
-Wait, I’m sorry. What? -Hi.
So...did you remember what we talked about?
-Is this a joke? -So, have you sized up...
the situation? Do you know--
Um, excuse me, ma’am. Are you, like...
Hi. I’m having a conversation.
Yes, and I introduced myself to you.
This is Corinne. This is Corinne.
She’s a nice girl. She’s a nice girl.
She’s nice, but I wanna talk business.
Oh, sh--.
I have a lot of experience in this space.
Mind games are essential to establishing your dominance.
-May the games begin. -Great. That’s so fun.
I’ll take a pickle. Pickle--a baby pick--
-A mini pickle. A--A-- -You know what I call that?
I call that trying way too ----ing hard.
Oh, sh--.
So, have a great ----ing day, bitch.
♪
I’ve been here five minutes, and there’s already fighting.
Being around women that are this intimidating is scary.
I am literally petrified.
I mean... [laughs] Love it.
[crying]
-Okay. -Can we work together?
Are you gonna, like, stab me in the back?
I’m making you an offer that you shouldn’t refuse
to work with two legends.
♪
You know...give me the next few hours.
It all feels a little too good to be true right now.
It’s almost as if they have something very sinister planned.
-Okay. -Just wanted to say hi.
Oh, my God. You’re gorgeous! Bring it in.
-Aw. -What’s your name?
-Anafisa. -Hi. Nice to meet you.
-Sit down and be friends. -I thought they were lying.
-Ah! [laughs] -Well, well, well,
it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.
-How are you? -How are you? [kisses]
You have the absolute most iconic...queen
of reality television villainy, Omarosa, in all of her glory.
Haven’t you done this, like, a million times?
-No. -Didn’t the last time
you competed, you competed with a girl.
-And I took her money. -And they gave you a choice...
-Yes. -...to split it.
Now they won the money together.
I need to, uh, look after myself and invest in my future.
So, I’m gonna go ahead and, uh, take the money and run, T.J.
[crying]
-You guys are roomies. -Perfect.
You’re in the terra cotta room. We know that.
I think me, too.
-Aw. -Okay.
Jax--huge threat. Physical threat,
but also, I’m not too crazy about having a male roommate,
so I’m already thinking of how can I get rid of him?
Is that mean?
[laughs]
♪
Omarosa did somethin’ to her.
-Please. -Oh, my God.
You don’t feel the "B" word, do you? Bully?
-[crying] -Because the New York in me
would say why is my roommate crying?
I don’t walk past nobody.
I definitely know Omarosa from "The Apprentice."
Do not rub her the wrong way because
we’ve all seen her in action, and she is crazy.
♪
Wow, dude. This is sick.
Is this how the other shows you’ve been on were like?
Was there, like, a house that you guys were all chilling in?
Uh, yeah-ish.
♪
So, tell me where you’re from. Forgive me. I haven’t--
I don’t know what show you’re from.
Uh, yeah. [laughs] It’s fine. I was on "90 Day Fiancé."
Why would they call you a villain?
I was called the gold digger.
So, the retail on this is $300,000.
If he proposed to me with some cheap ring,
I think I’m not gonna marry him.
If I was a gold digger, would I be here?
I would probably be married to some rich dude,
so if you’re a young and pretty girl,
that’s just--this label just gets put on you.
Are there people who give you good vibes who you like?
-You. [laughs] -Oh. [laughs]
I prefer to keep to myself,
but being nice is a part of my strategy.
-Omarosa. -Oh, my God, Tiffany.
Have you met my roommate, the big A?
-Yes, woman. -Yes.
-Can I tell you who she is? -No.
I’m gonna tell the story.
She was the first Black woman that I know
that had a dating show. -Yeah. Yeah.
-Is there anyone else? -No.
Omarosa knows how to greet an HBIC.
I do have to tell you something.
-What did I do? -Corinne.
-Who is that? -That’s my roommate.
Okay, but you bonded with her?
People weaponize tears to make you appear to be the bully.
Corinne is duplicitous and dangerous.
Never seen somebody come upstairs so quick crying.
-Yeah, but let it out. -[crying]
The first to cry is the first to fry.
You know the rules of reality TV.
She gotta go.
[sighs]
♪
-Welcome to "House of Villains." -[cheering]
The winner of the Battle Royale will be named
the Supervillain of the Week and get to select
the three people that will be on the Hit List.
One of them will go home.
♪
Villains!
Here...we...go!
-Jax! Get in there! -[grunts]
I’m here to win. I’m out for 200 grand.
[grunts]
[cackles]
♪
All right, so what happened? All right.
She says, "You know what I like to call that?
Trying too ----ing hard, bitch!"
And she walks up, and she goes up the stairs.
-Shut up. -Am I lying?
-Whoa. -[laughter]
We’re just re-enacting everything.
Oh, we’re recreating.
We’re re-enacting, ’cause we weren’t here.
’Cause it was, you know, it was her. It was--
I’m fine. Everything’s fine.
-I’m mostly a mama now. -I know that’s right.
Once I had my son, I was done with everything.
There is $200,000 on the line, and you guys know
I came here to win, so I’m gonna battle it out
so that I could take care of my family, my son.
Yes, baby. Yeah.
...we can’t let it be known today that we have one.
-No, no, no, no, no. -You get what I’m sayin’?
-Of course. -No, no, no.
-Yeah. -Us three are like
a really good, like-- -I like our vibe.
Yeah.
[crow cawing]
♪
[horse whinnies]
♪
WOMAN: [over loudspeaker] Good afternoon, villains.
-Wha...? -Who’s that?
I am E.V.A., and I will be helping you on this journey.
Hi!
Please report to the backyard for an important announcement.
Okay!
Here we go.
-Oh! I know this guy! -I’m glad it’s you.
-Yes. -I’m glad it’s you.
Oh, it’s him! It’s Carson Daly! It’s Carson. Isn’t it--
-Isn’t his name Carson Daly? -Oh, sh--.
Come on out, guys. Come on out.
-Our host is out here, y’all. -How are ya?
-Nice. -Jax.
I don’t know if you’re allowed to touch me.
-That’s okay. -Oh, my God!
Isn’t he, like, a comedian?
Are they supposed to stand over here? I don’t even know.
-Good to see you! -It’s been a while.
-Guys, look at this. -Oh, you look good.
Do you think I’m gonna stay in this--
No, I’m not staying in this house. I’m just--
-Wait, what’s your name? -I’m hosting.
-Hi. Corinne. -Hi, Corinne. Joel.
-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you.
Oh, I thought your name was Carson Daly.
-How dare you? -Wait, what’s his name?
-Joel-- -Joel McHale.
-[laughter] -Oh, Joel McHale!
-Yeah, yeah! You’re a comedian! -I’m Joel.
Wait, you’re a comedian! Wait, I know--I know you!
I know you. I know you from E!, right?
It’s very humiliating to me already.
Isn’t he on E!? Okay. I’m sorry. I said Carson Daly.
Wow, I’m an idiot.
I’m gonna stand here. You guys can’t compliment me.
I’m just glad you’re not Nick Lachey!
Can I put my shoes back on?
I see that I’ve already lost control.
-Forward. Step forward. -Get forward, guys.
-Come forward. -Wait. Wait, wait.
Well, here we go, guys.
[beep, projector whirring]
Hello, everyone. How’s it going?
-Hey! -[cheering]
Welcome to "House of Villains." The whole shoot...
-Wait for the jet. -Hey.
-[jet roaring overhead] -[beep, projector whirring]
Guys, as you know, on "The Soup,"
-I made fun of a lot of-- -[laughs]
That’s actually a hard punch, dude. Damn.
-Okay, here we go. -[beep, projector whirring]
We have to say these rules because the--
Huh? you have to stand outside for another 20 minutes.
I know it’s cold, guys. Give us--we’re almost there.
Can we have a cigar while we’re waiting?
[beeping, projector whirring]
I guarantee this one, this job--Go ahead, Matt.
I’m done, y’all. I’m serious.
All right, well, guys, this was great.
-[laughter] -We did--
-We had our shot. -Yeah.
[projector whirring]
[engine roars]
-Wow. -Wow.
-That’s sick. -Now, that’s an arrival.
-Just what I like. -[laughs]
Yes. Hey, boo.
That’s how you make an entrance. [laughs]
Oh, wow.
[laughter and cheers]
Guys, welcome to "House of Villains."
[cheering]
The new competition show based on the idea,
if one villain is great for ratings,
10 will either get us an Emmy or canceled.
[laughter]
You’ve been brought together because you’re some
of reality TV’s most infamous villains.
You have wreaked havoc as part
of the most cutthroat reality shows of all time--
"Survivor,"
"The Bachelor,"
the Trump White House.
-Oh, burn. -He’s...I--
Watch yourself, Joel. Watch yourself.
Okay, well, I know that some of you don’t feel like villains.
Some of you may think you’ve been misrepresented
by the producers or misunderstood by the audience.
-Either way, we don’t care. -[laughter]
So, go cry to your agent.
Yes. That’s right. These people have agents.
-[cash register bell dings] -[laughter]
Here, you’ll be presented with Battle Royale challenges
designed to test your ability to do things reality TV villains
are known best to do--
lie, cheat, backstab, manipulate.
The winner of the Battle Royale will be named
the Supervillain of the Week,
will be immune from the next elimination
and get to select the three people
that will be on the Hit List.
One of them will go home.
In the end, after we’ve done too many competitions,
bullsh-- alliances have been made and broken,
and careers have been destroyed,
one of you will stand victorious as America’s great supervillain
and walk out of here with $200,000 in cash.
[cheering]
Your first Battle Royale challenge starts shortly.
-Let’s go! -You guys get outta here.
-Bye, Joel. -Okay.
E.V.A.: Please get changed, villains.
It’s time to see who amongst yo has the biggest balls.
♪
XL? Uh, wrong size, man!
Never come out too hot and win the first challenge.
That’s actually how you put a big target on your back.
The game that I play, you either die a hero,
or you live long enough to become a villain,
and, um, I plan on living forever.
♪
"Jax... [clears throat] Good luck, honey.
We love you so much, and we will miss you like crazy.
But kick some villain booty. Cruz has the best daddy ever.
Love, love, love you, Brittany and Cruz."
♪
This is why I get anxiety. Oh, it’s gonna make me tear up.
I have a really good support system at home.
I have an amazing family.
I wanna give my wife a big kiss
and hug my son more than anything.
So, for them, I gotta do what we gotta do to win.
All right.
Going into this challenge, I’m not sure what to expect.
I don’t watch that much reality TV.
I have no idea what I’m getting myself into.
Challenge time.
I’ve definitely never done any competition shows before this,
so I’m excited, but I’m even more nervous. [laughs]
[fanfare playing, crowd cheering]
-They have the faces on there. -That’s funny.
-[laughs] -That’s so cool.
♪
Yeah!
Let’s go, baby!
-All right. -Go do it.
Aah!
-[laughter] -Oh, sh--.
-Wait. I didn’t-- -Whoo!
-Nailed it. -Oh, my God.
-Line it up. -Here we go.
There’s a football field. [scoffs] Good.
There’s huge plastic balls. Awesome.
I’m a competitive guy, a strong guy.
How can I possibly lose this? Look at me.
[growling]
-Look at the rest of the cast. -[music distorts and winds down
Guys, just group hug until you warm up.
-Oh. -I’m kidding. I’m kidding.
Stop touching each other. You’re villains.
♪
Welcome to your first Battle Royale challenge.
[cheering]
These challenges are designed to test your villainous ways,
and the winner will be declared the Supervillain of the Week.
[cheering]
-Yeah! -Yeah!
Whoever wins this challenge is safe from elimination.
-They also get a luxury reward. -Oh.
You’ll be able to bring two other villains with you
on your reward to make alliances and stuff.
The supervillain also gets to place three people
on the Hit List.
Those are the only villains who will be up for elimination.
And the Hit List-- of those three people,
one of them will go home,
and they will not be able to take home $200,000.
Okay, are you ready
for your first Battle Royale challenge?
-Yes! -[cheering]
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...
Balls Out.
[laughter]
And no, it’s not what you’re thinking.
Here’s how it works.
In the arena are a bunch of giant balls.
Each ball has one of your faces on it.
That is your ball.
On "go," you’ll race to push your opponent’s balls
out of the arena...
while making sure your own ball stays inside.
If your ball is pushed out,
you’re eliminated from the challenge.
Now, that doesn’t mean you’re done, though,
because you can still help push out other balls.
The villain whose ball is
the last one remaining in the arena wins the challenge.
And just to say it a few more times, balls, balls,
balls, balls, balls, balls. -[laughter]
-Great. It’s out of my system. -[laughter]
Balls. Damn it. Okay.
[laughter]
I’ve never won a reality show before.
This could be the time that I actually win,
so I’m gonna do whatever I have to do to win this challenge.
You will have two minutes to make alliances,
make friendships, make enemies.
I’m still talking, and I’ll stop right now. Go!
You know what we have to do. We’re gonna get our balls.
-Okay. -Okay. Which corner?
-Which corner? -We’re gonna get our balls,
and we’re gonna put it into a corner.
Today’s challenge offers some strategy,
but a lot of physical strength,
and I’m seeing not too many people with that much strength
the same way Johnny, Jax, and Shake may have.
This may be a very, very close competition.
Does anyone want to win besides her and Jax?
-Okay. -I wanna win.
I’m not gonna form an alliance.
It’s a game. I’m here to win. I’m a competitive person.
I’m out for 200 grand.
Is that bad? Is that a bad thing?
You have to be very careful in this challenge because
whose ball you target, uh, is going to say a lot
about who you’re working with and who you’re working against.
Everybody in position.
Protect your ball and push other balls out.
Man, I don’t know what I signed up for, man. This--
I’m from the street. This scary. I go, and it’s dark.
Villains! Here...we...
go! Balls Out! [blows whistle]
-Whoo! -Whoo!
Omarosa not moving at all.
My strategy is to sit back, do nothing,
and watch each player take each other out.
They will go after the bigger threats,
and I’ll be sitting pretty.
♪
[grunts]
NEW YORK: Jax! Get him, Jax! Get him!
-Whoa! -There it goes.
This is an interesting strategy. Bobby’s not even near his ball.
[grunting]
I’m thinking strategy and not egotistically right now.
By me showing the other cast members,
the ones that I’m forming alliances with,
that I’m willing to actually sacrifice my own ball
in order to help them, it’s very telling.
Chess, not Checkers, people. Okay?
Hey, put my ball in the corner.
Okay. Okay.
Aah! Wait! No! No!
No, you bastard!
Get the [bleep] away from my ball, you son of a bitch!
-JOE: New York is out. -[bleep] you! [bleep] you!
Her ball is out of the game.
Okay, I see who’s playing the game.
I thought you were Bobby. [laughs]
No, you didn’t.
"Oh, New York, I’m sorry.
I thought that you was Bobby Lytes."
-[grunts] -[grunts]
-Jax! Get him, Jax!
-Get him! -[grunting]
As long as Jax is around, I’m going for him first
just because he is one of the more...
big and physical players.
JOEL: Jax’s ball has been eliminated by Shake.
I don’t know what I just started with him.
I came into this. Jax moving like a bull.
Let’s run through everything, and let’s take the balls out.
But, uh, this is not a game where it requires strength.
It requires "strate-gery."
I immediately realized I ----ed up.
♪
JOEL: Oh, boy. Bobby, nicely done.
Good job! Yes!
JOEL: Shake has just been eliminated!
Shake’s ball is out!
It is what it is.
Omarosa still hasn’t moved.
Y’all, I can’t-- I gotta work smarter.
I can’t work harder. I’m older.
I feel like the smart people know
now is not the time to get your hands bloody.
-OMAROSA: Bananas is-- -[grunts]
Oh! Whoa! That was aggressive!
I know, but we gotta finish this.
Jax, I didn’t do anything to you.
There are rules in the House of Villains.
So, rule number one, if you’re not working with me,
you’re working against me.
No! [bleep]! No!
JOEL: Corinne’s ball has been pushed out.
-Ahh! -JOEL: Bobby’s ball is out.
NEW YORK: Oh, that’s so mean! That’s so mean!
JOEL: Jonny Fairplay is out!
Anfisa’s ball is on the move.
Three against one, and it has been pushed out.
Bobby is exhausted.
Guys, this is harder than what I thought. Way harder.
JOEL: Who’s peeing?
First time in the game Balls Out
where someone did take their balls out
and relieve themselves.
Did you wash your hands, you disgusting animal?!
Hell, no!
Oh, boy. We got three balls left.
We got Johnny Bananas, Tanisha, and Omarosa.
Move, Tanisha!
-JOEL: Oh, no! Tanisha is out! -[bleep] [bleep].
Sorry. I just want to finish.
Yo, he think this the Super Bowl, bro.
I was ready to go.
We are down to Omarosa and Johnny Bananas.
What do you want to do, Omarosa?!
Let me have it! You safe!
I don’t know if this is the person
I want to be in this position with.
Omarosa has a reputation for being an opportunist.
♪
What do you want to do, Omarosa?!
Let me have it! You safe!
Omarosa is the definition
of working smarter, not harder, and now it’s just a stalemate.
-If I let you have it... -You safe! You have my word!
I’m not gonna be to one of the three?
You have my word.
I don’t think there’s any bigger opportunity
than to make a deal with me,
only to turn around and throw me to the wolves.
Don’t play me.
Listen, I’ll throw my ball out right now.
-Hug on it? -Yes.
-All right. Go. -All right.
I don’t care. Take it, Bobby.
JOEL: And it is out-- Johnny Bananas.
-Omarosa is the winner! -[cheering]
You better come through!
JOEL: Wow. Look at that. What a game.
Incredible. Omarosa is our Supervillain of the Week.
She won Balls Out. She will not be eliminated.
You’ll go on your luxury reward tomorrow,
and you will pick two other villains to go with you.
After the luxury reward, you will pick the three people
that will be on the Hit List.
The three villains on the Hit List will compete.
The winner will be taken off the Hit List
and is safe from Banishment.
The losers will stay on the Hit List
and will still be up for Banishment.
All of you will vote out one of these people.
All right. Get outta here, you kids.
-All right. All right. -Get outta here. Good job.
-Let’s go! -Good job.
You can take your ball with you. Everybody, take your ball.
♪ You know that you’re my deadly sin ♪
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
♪ Oh, oh ♪
♪ Your wicked ways ♪
-Oh, my God. -I know.
I don’t understand why I’m this sore. Like...
-You were going ham, dude. -I went a little much, huh?
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪ Your wicked games ♪
♪ Oh, oh ♪
♪
-Lookit. This is all shoes. -Yeah.
And this is all my supplements.
-Loofah, shampoo. -Yeah.
-Uh, pre-workout. -Okay.
-Uh, big dick pills. -All right.
-They haven’t worked yet. -You got me there. All right.
Mnh-mnh.
[whispers] Ahh!
[singsongy] Old school, new school.
We can breathe.
I can’t believe they’re letting the old school stay in the game.
-Do they not know we’re homies? -Apparently not.
Remember you used to sneak out of our house to go to parties?
NEW YORK: Of course.
Now I sneak out of parties to go to my house.
-I don’t even show up no more. -I’m that way now.
But in the beginning, I went from working as a bartender.
Now all of a sudden, I got a boatload of money,
and I think I just burned myself to the ground.
But was it a time of your life for you, though?
I had the best time of my freaking life.
Yeah. So worth it.
I’ve made one mistake in the 10 years.
What would that be? You seem so flawless.
I was unfaithful to my girlfriend.
I ended up marrying the woman, so...
Mm.
You know, I’m not justifying it at all, but I made it--
Oh, not at all. It’s never justifiable,
but a man can forget their appendage sometimes.
I’ve cheated on pretty much every girlfriend that I’ve had.
Yeah...I’ve cheated on every girlfriend that I’ve had.
But, uh, it was a learning experience,
and meeting the right girl changed everything for me.
-I need a shower. -Yeah, let’s take a shower.
I got to wait in line behind two girls.
But I’m being a gentleman.
That’s the chivalrous thing to do.
Yeah, right? Especially when I got Omarosa picking tomorrow.
-I need to... -Mm-hmm.
Take the longest shower as you want.
♪
[yawns]
♪
[coughs loudly]
[Jax sighs]
♪
JAX: Good night, everybody.
[loud snoring]
♪
How’d you--How’d you sleep?
Besides my roommate snoring his ass off?
[blows nose loudly]
♪
SHAKE: Yesterday I enjoyed meeting everyone in the house.
It was just such a chill time.
This is the best you could possibly feel,
walking into a hostile situation.
Shake, who do you want to go home?
I’ll think about it. Just woke up.
Let me have this coffee, and, uh...
You think too long, it might be you. [laughs]
Oh, God.
Mmm. I’m getting hungry.
I wonder what we have downstairs.
Oh, I can make grilled cheese.
Did you see the, um, ingredients for that downstairs?
-Cheese and bread? -Uh-huh.
-Yeah. -Oh, good.
Shake, do you think we’re gonna have
physical challenges like that going forward?
-Morning, sunshine. -Hi, boo. [laughs]
I think they’re gonna be more, like, puzzle-y.
I’ll do puzzles, but you see, I ain’t running around a lot.
I can’t compete against somebody 20 years, 25 years old
jump--running around with all that energy.
Yeah, Jax came like a wrecking ball, like--
I’m the one that got hit by Jax.
-Me, too. -That’s the only hit I got.
-I mean, I forgot where I was. -[laughs]
He knocked me out like I owed him money in the street.
[slow motion yelling]
♪
-[slow motion grunting] -[slow motion voice] Oh!
Jax, you must have bigger balls than the balls we had.
-Yes. Yes. [laughs] -Why? What happened?
To mess with somebody from New York.
TANISHA: Okay?!
I’m not used to these challenges. I didn’t know we--
I thought you just go balls out and you try to win.
I didn’t do too well. He got me out in two seconds.
-So... [laughs] -Yeah. Shake. Okay.
Are you saying Shake is the biggest competitor?
No, I-- he just caught me off-guard.
But like I said, it’s a game. Hey, it was--it’s all good.
Well, Who do you think is the biggest competitor?
Physical threat?
♪
Bobby was a-- Bobby--Bobby was a machine.
Bobby was a machine last night.
So, maybe he was running on pure, just...
-Adrenaline. -...adrenaline.
He is the most entertaining person in this house.
The rest of you all are boring as hell.
-Oh, really? -[laughs]
Now that she’s Supervillain of the Week,
Omarosa is like the don of the Mafia.
You gotta go in now and kiss the ring.
I haven’t prepared for this.
I didn’t bring any gifts to give our savior.
[birds chirping]
[bell tolls]
Good morning, villains.
Please report to the bar immediately.
Should we see what’s going on inside?
Oh, my goodness. [sighs]
Congratulations, Omarosa,
on being the house’s first ever supervillain.
[cheering]
For your luxury reward,
you’ve earned some much needed pampering,
and you get to take two other villains with you.
Please announce who you will be choosing to go on your reward.
[laughs] Um...
I thought about this all night, about who I would take,
and I really wanna get to know you, Tanisha.
-Oh, awesome. -I know you’re a new mom,
and I know that this would be a great getaway for you.
-Thank you so much. -Thank you.
And I also thought about the challenge last night
and who really went all out,
and I can tell you that Bobby outplayed everybody.
-[laughs] -Oh.
And so I would like to take Bobby as my second guest.
Okay. Yeah!
We’re gonna get--get ready.
TANISHA: Okay, you guys. See you guys later.
Tanisha and Bobby are the two players with the biggest mouth,
the ones who gossip and always are in the mix,
And I wanna get intel from them
as I go into the first Hit List ceremony.
-Hey, babe. -Yeah.
By the way, Omarosa flat out doesn’t like you.
-She said it. -Oh, big ----ing whoop. Okay.
If I got sent home, people are going to hate this show
and be like, "Ew, this is stupid.
We’re not watching anywhere."
I’m telling you, she knows how Bachelor Nation is,
and she wants me off
because she knows I’m gonna take the spotlight from her.
[sighs] I’m ----ing pissed.
Of course.
if you go home, I’m going home right beside you
because you’re my roommate, and when I tell you
I’m not ----ing going home,
and you’re not ----ing going home,
mark my words, you will be here.
♪
[singsongy] Well, let’s go have a good time.
-Yes. -Let’s go.
Going to the spot looking like this.
And I heard--I heard it’s--
I heard it’s something super-- it’s really classy.
Oh, yes, honey. It’s one of the best.
See you later, suckers!
♪ Just so you know, this ain’t the problem you want ♪
♪ You can tell them boys you roll with whatever you want ♪
BOBBY: God knows what they’re saying.
OMAROSA: Oh, they’re gonna be sitting
and talking while we’re gone.
They definitely painted you the villain.
-Mm. -Yeah.
I’m starting to think people was lying.
Do you know my background? Do you know what happened to me?
No!
My father was murdered when I was 7.
-Oh, my God. I’m sorry. -So, I already--
-I came into, like, trauma. -Just trauma. Right.
My mother was in the projects with four kids.
-She was determined to make it. -Look how you overcame that.
You don’t look like what you’ve been through, basically.
You get your--no, I like that. You don’t--
Right. But see, when people say, "You have an edge,"
I’m like, "I earned this edge." -Right.
The first time I saw myself on television,
I had an edge to me because of where I grew up
and how I grew up,
but I didn’t want that to be the totality of who I am.
And so it allowed me to reassess and make some adjustments
to how I interact with people.
People think, "Oh, you live a glamorous life."
Yeah, but...
Yep, yep, me, too.
Me, too.
See, that’s the one thing that I think we all relate to.
My goal is to buy my mother a house, you know?
OMAROSA AND TANISHA: Aw.
Yeah. That’s what I’ve been working my whole life for.
-TANISHA: Oh, my God! -Yes, honey.
Every villain needs their pampering.
-Absolutely. -Hi.
-Hi. Welcome. -Lady O. is here.
Welcome to Burke Williams. How are you?
Welcome to Burke Williams.
WOMAN: We are excited to have you today.
Are you ready for some fabulous services?
-Yes. -Of course.
All right. Well, follow us. We’ll take you right in.
-Awesome. Yes. -Let’s go.
-Does anybody need a beer? -Uh, I could use--
I don’t know if I want a beer. Actually, you know what?
I’ll take a White Russian.
If you go inside and find one of those, can you--
-I don’t... -A White Russian?
-CORINNE: What is that? -Is that a poolside drink?
-You’re not allowed to say that. -[laughter]
-Whoa! -[laughter]
Oh, man, that went right over my head at first.
Oh, my God, you’re sick.
No, no, the drink. We have milk and--and Kahlua, right?
What are you guys talking about?
You do have a very tough job because you have
to figure out who’s being put up.
Whoever you put up there,
three people are gon’ be looking at you moving forward.
This is the anxiety you get on competition shows constantly.
I was getting in my head about the damn competition.
I’m like, God, did I go too hard?
That’s just naturally what I do. I’m a competitor.
I play basketball. You wanna win. But now--
Bro, there is no way to play this correctly.
There is no--
I don’t think I’m mentally tough enough to be here.
I’m mentally physically enough to be here.
[music winds down, tape rewinding sound]
I’m mentally physically enough to be here,
but I wanna win this.
I got a kid I got to put through college.
Like, 200 grand is a lot of money.
We have to not just think about who we put up,
but who do you think will win
and the other two that’ll be left.
And then who will be left and then who...
-Will have the vote. -...who has the votes.
So that’s where I need y’all’s help.
BOBBY: Corinne for sure.
Why do you think I’m choosing Corinne?
You flat out said it.
I have so much anxiety for later.
I know I’m in the challenge,
so I’m just hoping it’s something I can actually do.
I don’t know much about Shake.
Have you spent a lot of time with him?
I’m not--I can’t say that I-- I can’t say that I h--
I don’t like Shake, and I can’t say that I’m--I’m--I like him.
Not even the damn games.
It’s the people just getting together and voting people off.
That’s all it is. The games don’t mean anything.
Why they got to do that to us?
Why can’t we all just live harmoniously here?
-That’s why I like my show. -Man, my next show I do--
That’s why the shows I usually go on are actual--mine are--
-Like, chillin’? -Mine are shows, not voted off.
Okay, this is the last voting off show I’m doing.
I am a little nervous
about the cutthroat nature of the show.
Uh, I’m not a cutthroat person.
I would never describe myself as one.
But do you think he’ll win over Johnny Bananas?
Oh, ’cause you’re thinking Johnny Bananas?
Well, no, I gave my word to Johnny, so...
I’m happy to be out of that,
and I don’t have to get blood on my hands,
’cause now what you’re doing is you’re picking two people
that you’re gonna essentially leave the house with,
so everyone’s gonna be talking about you.
-You’re nominating three. -Yeah.
And then two of those people are coming back
and who are gonna obviously gonna wanna go against you
because you just put them in.
By making a deal with Omarosa,
what I’m trying to do at this point is, like,
reduce the size of the target on my back
and reduce the amount of tension on me.
-No, no, I would never... -Yeah.
But...
♪
TANISHA: No. Well, listen, you have the power.
This is--This is-- you can get to your own--
No, I’m saying I don’t mind putting him up,
but will you guys have my back when you win next week?
-Yeah. -Of course.
Is she really about to put up Johnny Bananas
even though they had a deal?
Omarosa right now is in her true villain behavior.
She is not here to play around right now.
♪
[singsongy] Villains, we’re home!
-Oh! -Oh, boy.
-Come on. -Okay.
Let’s see what they did.
Wow! You looking fabuloso!
-Hey. -[all speaking at once]
[bell tolls]
E.V.A.: Good evening, villains.
It’s time for the Hit List nominations.
Please dress in your fanciest attire
and meet downstairs in one hour
-I feel like sh--. -I’m gonna change
and head back down. -All right.
I’m anxious. I’m like, you know, impatient.
I’m antsy. Things are getting real.
♪
I like this wrap on you. It gives...power.
[bell tolls]
Please find the secret bookcase
TANISHA: Where is it at? Where’s the bookcase?
-This is the bookcase. -There’s the bookcase.
Yes. Okay. All right.
You go first. You dressed for it.
[door creaks]
That was a secret room this whole entire time?
What is it, Jax?
I have a little anxiety ’cause I don’t know what’s going on.
-Is it a secret room? -What the [bleep]?
-Oh, wow! -Oh, hey!
[laughter]
Wait, guys, I wanna join the secret book club.
[door creaks]
♪
-Wow. -What?
-Whoa. -Well, this is...
-Stop it. For real? -This is crazy.
We’ve just walked into some weird dungeon-ist chamber.
-Oh! -Yeah!
This is a supervillain fortress.
Mr. Evil Chair.
This is everything that I dream about
if I were to have my dream home. This is awesome!
Hello, villains, and welcome to the Stronghold.
[cheering]
It’s party time.
The Fortress will be your home
to both our Hit List nominations and Banishment ceremonies.
It’s a shame that so many of you
will have your days ruined in such a nice room.
Omarosa, congratulations.
You are the Supervillain of the Week.
Please take the chair in front of you.
[suspenseful music playing]
♪
[person coughs]
♪
[laughs]
Being the first supervillain, it’s a lot of pressure.
There are a lot of decisions to be made,
a lot of consequences to consider.
I nominate three people on the Hit List, but two come back.
So, I have to make the right decisions
for the long game, for my game.
If you’re not at the table, you’re on the menu.
♪
Omarosa, who will you be pissing off today?
The first person that I thought of,
the one who doesn’t know how to use Google, clearly,
and that’s Corinne.
♪
[whistles]
Don’t worry. Just depends on what the challenge is.
I’m sorry that you’re so irrelevant
that you need to tell people to Google you,
but I can’t relate.
The next person on my radar for nomination...
♪
...is Shake.
[gasps]
-Oh. Okay. -[laughs]
-I’m just in disbelief. -Damn.
Could it be because I didn’t jump on the opportunity
to work with her in the beginning?
Didn’t think that was gonna come back to bite me,
but if I do make it through this elimination,
I need to get my mind right.
I can’t play this game like this anymore.
Things are getting real.
Omarosa, who is your final Hit List nomination?
This next one is really hard because he is truly a legend.
He’s competed year after year
in a very physical reality show,
and he’s won over and over again.
My worst fears are about to, uh, become a reality.
He is a huge threat, and if I don’t make a move now,
I’ll regret it.
God damn.
This is an epic blunder for Omarosa
to basically double-cross me and cut my throat
in front of the entire house.
-If I let you have it... -You safe. You have my word.
You’re not--I’m not gonna be one of the three?
You have my word.
So, the person who should go up for nomination,
and that...
♪
...is Bananas.
♪
But instead...
I saw someone else who was just as physical
and actually gave him a run for his money.
She’s good.
Jax.
Omarosa...I just sh-- myself.
[laughter]
While it would have been a great television moment
for her to nominate me, glad she didn’t.
But I now see why Omarosa is an absolute villain.
I need a diaper change, please.
♪
Here are your first three Hit List nominees.
When we come back to this room,
all of you will vote out one of these three people.
One of them will be banished from the house
and lose out on their chance to win $200,000.
I guess I’ve been slacking off a little bit.
I’ve been treating this like a vacation,
but everyone else has been moving a lot faster than me.
So, now I feel like I’m definitely behind the 8-ball.
I, Joel McHale, shall now say goodbye to you
as you now leave the Stronghold.
I like to hurt people who do bad things.
Do not poke the bear, ’cause if you poke me,
I will come after you. This is war.
It’s time to get back to work.
JOEL: Go ahead. See you guys.
Bye.
I am ----ing pissed, and I am coming for you, Omarosa.
And you are going to regret this
because America is going to hate you
even more than they already do now.
♪
----ing loser.
JOEL: Let’s go. There you go.
♪
You’re watching...CNN.
"House of Villains."
[thunderclap]
This season on "House of Villains"...
Let the games mother----ing begin!
[growling]
-What do I do? -[screaming]
-[yelling] -What the [bleep] is that?
[growl]
Oh, man. This part of the game gets tough.
Bare ass. Come on, guys!
-Bitches, game on. -This is war.
-JOEL: It’s raining balls! -[cheering]
With $200,000 on the line, no one is safe.
Aah! I can’t see anything.
Whoo-hoo! Bugs and fish and snakes.
My favorite!
♪
-[pop] -Bubbles and blindside.
-Bubbles. -Bubbles and blindside.
Blindside!
[cheering]
-Take me to Hollywood, baby. -This is so romantic.
Cheers, guys, to a beautiful ride.
Do any of you feel like the house is missing something?
[doorbell rings]
-It’s Satan. -[growls]
-Is that Snooki? -Welcome Carol Baskin.
CAROL: Hey, all you cool cats and kittens.
Carol!
-What’s up, man? I’m Shake. -Spencer. Spencer Pratt.
-Who -Who?
Who is this guy?
-What’d you go to prison for? -I was a villain on a TV show.
-Wait, I’ve been to jail. -Bobby!
I’ve been a convicted felon.
[growl]
I’m a Scorpio. I’m getting horny.
I’m getting feisty.
If you don’t kiss me, I’m gonna think you’re working against me,
so ----ing kiss me.
If something’s fallin’, give it a push.
[laughter]
I was destined to be a villain
from the second I came out of the womb.
How was your rest?
I’ll have to learn to be fake in this house.
How’s your family doing back home?
Something strange is afoot.
I’m going to [bleep] him up!
If I see you out in Hollywood,
I will gladly go back to jail for you.
I feel like my demons are just coming back.
-You going down before I do. -I’m coming for you, bitch.
Get out of my face, you [bleep]-sucking,
[bleep]-guzzling Republican [bleep].
This show is gonna be really good.
[laughter]
♪
Now I feel like we’re in a ----ing house of villains.
[evil laughter]
Yo, we’re definitely getting a second season.