Previously on "House of Villains"...
We’re definitely not in Jersey anymore.
You might know me from the "Real Housewives of New Jersey."
"Bad Girls Club."
-"Big Brother." -"RuPaul’s Drag Race."
Original "Survivor" winner.
Oh, you went away too?
You can call me Vicky or queen.
Oh, I like Vicky.
-Safaree. -I’m in part of disbelief.
Do we live together again?
Has that tongue touched that tongue?
Ooh!
-You’re a big Raiders girl, huh? -Uh-huh. Raider nation.
Your first Battle Royale Challenge
is Crimes Against Reality.
Yeah.
There it is!
-[cheering] -[airhorn sounding]
Who have you chosen to be this week’s Super Villain?
Safaree!
It is Safaree, everybody.
You have to pick two people to take on your reward.
Wes and Pec.
Okay, you guys are going on your group date,
but we’re gonna do a one-on-one later.
-Okay. -We basically would put in
two pawns and a target.
The target would be Vicky.
Safaree, who is the first villain
you are pissing off today?
But that spot on the Hit List is.
Safaree, your Pepto Bismol-themed jacket
needs to make another decision.
-Larissa. -I’m confused.
-I thought we had a pact. -Kandy.
You are the next bitch out of this ----ing house.
Now, clock that tea!
Sh--.
Wow.
Bitch.
I can’t deal with Safaree.
Like, he’s disgusting.
Victoria.
I’m disgusted I breathed the same air as him.
Girl, give me a ----ing shot of tequila.
-Where’s the ice? -Where’s the ice?
-Butch production. -When you order liquor,
you wanna get your bottle with your ice.
Babe, they’re doing their best. Why are you not grateful?
Grateful?
Safaree, what made you choose
to go against your team yesterday,
after you said you would?
Because now, you’re showing your true colors.
-I thought it was cool. -No, listen. Talk to Wes.
-Wes? -Sure, you wanna sit down?
Sure.
This is exactly what I wanted.
I’m gonna let people think that Wes is pulling the strings,
and I’m gonna sit back and watch the show.
I’m very happy right now.
Why would you go against your team?
What’s going on?
Who is?
Wes.
Right.
And you’re safe.
Not to mention, you could win the thing.
I’m gonna talk to Wes, because that’s ----ed up.
In the long term, the only real mistake that he made
-Is... -Was not telling you.
Girl, these three little boyfriends
had their little boyfriend date today,
and all of a sudden, came up with a plan to use me as a pawn.
So, I’ll play the pawn, but you better ----ing save me.
Why are you saying you’re having a plan for Kandy?
We didn’t say we had a plan for Kandy.
Because that’s what Larissa said.
We’re talking as team members
as to why our-- My team members betrayed me.
But the team is over, so like...
Well, the team is over. Look, it’s the name of the game.
At the end of the day,
three people are gonna be in the bottom,
someone’s gonna go home, it’s what we signed up for,
but tomorrow, we go into the Redemption Challenge,
and we’ll see what happens.
I don’t know why I feel like crying.
-No, no. -Well, you’re in the bottom.
-Feel the emotions. -Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
On my show, we call them eliminations.
I’ve been sent into more eliminations
than anyone in the history of the genre.
It basically means I’m the most mathematically bullied man
in reality television.
-That’s crazy. -Yeah.
So, earlier in the day, I really wanted Victoria to leave.
I think the target would be Vicky.
You could tell she just wants-- she just wants to win.
-I don’t wanna go home. -Well...
But what I’m realizing right now
is that she is a desperate young woman,
and one of my favorite past times
is finding a desperate person and saving their life,
so that they can come back and save my life
later on in the game.
-I got a prescription for you. -Okay.
You need to go get an Aperol spritz.
-No, I’ll cry. -Okay.
And I’m probably hungry, but now I’m like,
don’t wanna eat.
I was waiting the whole time to eat.
Well, I’m sorry. I know it hurts.
I’m like the bad guy version of Obi-Wan.
Okay, yeah, let’s do an Aperol spritz.
Okay.
He shouldn’t-- But he has his own room there.
You guys haven’t even seen me in a bikini yet.
You really want me to go home?
It’s too cold for that.
Tomorrow, either you or me have to beat Veronica
in the Redemption Challenge.
Veronica, she can not win that challenge.
What was I calling her?
Oh, my God. This whole time?
I don’t believe Victoria’s the target at all,
so I feel like tomorrow,
I have to win the Redemption Challenge.
Maybe, it can be my chance
to come back and [bleep] Wes and Safar.
Yeah.
All right?
I’m on coochie patrol, make sure it don’t show.
Oh, my God. What, Hot Pockets? Absolutely not.
Yeah.
Yeah, this is working out very well.
This guys’ alliance is promising.
Like, I should be on the Hit List right now, and I’m not.
Nobody wants the pecs to go home yet.
[Jessie sighing]
Okay.
[lullaby music]
Little Timmy.
He’s a good boy.
He’s got plenty of brothers and sisters at home.
Aw. Say thank you, Timmy.
[high pitched] Thank you, Ms. Teresa.
He’s so well-behaved.
Safaree.
So, it’s...
Sorry. Just me.
That’s not me. I think of Shadowman, still.
Do you only follow 38 people?
Anyway, took a picture with Hugh Hefner’s storks...
I was blonde until recently.
I was explaining to a guy...
What the [bleep] do you think you’re doing?
Me and my dog.
Safaree doesn’t have a vote,
but she’s still trying to flirt while I’m sleeping.
Inconsiderate moron.
I love looking at myself.
I’ve come to the point
where I think Victoria ought to go.
Okay, night, Safaree.
♪
You’re the best roommate ever.
What the?
Yo, what’s up with this guy?
This guy’s showering with the door open.
This guy is nuts, showering with the door open.
Is this "Survivor?" What the hell.
-House of Survivor. -"Naked and Afraid."
He’s the naked one, you’re afraid.
[Richard whistling]
I’m making French toast.
Do the French actually eat the toast like this?
I don’t think so, right? They eat like, croissants?
I don’t know.
Hey, beautiful. I like your curls.
You sleep well?
Yeah, yeah.
-Guess what? -What?
I’m gonna cook for you guys tonight.
-Oh, my God. Yay! -Yeah.
I grew up in an old school Italian family.
I’m first-generation.
What I learned to do at home was cook.
I have four cookbooks, and right now,
I’m working on opening up a restaurant
with my daughter, Gia.
So, of course, my strategy is to cook for everyone
in the house, because the best place
to get to someone’s heart is through their stomach.
Where do you living, Richard?
Newport, Rhode Island.
Gay people meet each other through apps.
-It’s called a dating app-- -But it’s not dating.
But it’s more for hookups.
For me, you hook up, and then that’s when you decide
whether you want to go to dinner with them.
Do you ghost people, Richard?
Oh, yeah. Ghosting is normal.
I’m a 63-year-old guy,
so when I got divorced six years ago,
I thought it was over,
but I’ve learned that that’s just silly,
and I’m grateful, thankful,
and I enjoy every frickin’ moment of it.
And that’s gay culture.
Larissa’s pissed at you.
Have you been feeling that attitude from her?
Yeah, I haven’t said one word to her
-and she’s right there. -Yeah.
Hola.
-Okay. -Yeah.
-I love, like, a workout buddy. -Yeah.
That’s why you can’t go home.
I’m not going home.
Before I came, I got like, eight parking tickets.
My license is suspended.
I don’t have car insurance. I can’t afford it.
Two years ago, I made a OnlyFans,
so I was getting, like, money.
Then, I turned 30 and I’m like,
"I don’t want this. This isn’t me."
Guys, I actually do need to win this Redemption Challenge,
because I’ve been broke since I quit my OnlyFans.
My money’s always like, really big,
and then, I have nothing.
I need to win the prize money to, like...
organize my life a bit.
I suck at working out
because I just do a little bit, a little bit.
That’s all they need for cameras.
-Yeah. -That’s like--
-We look, like, sexy doing it. -Yeah.
Hold on. If she’s one of the people who goes up,
that’s who we’re voting out?
-Vicky was the target yesterday. -Yeah.
She’s a lot easier to like, communicate with.
We bring Vicky around as a lay-up.
Yeah because we can cut her whenever we want.
I find how bad Vicky is at this to be hilarious.
This show is really different than "The Bachelor."
Like, I learned that I’m like, easily manipulated.
We should keep her a little longer.
Everyone in this house that I claim to be working with
is a desperate person, and I love it
when I find desperate players.
My butt feels good.
I wanna form, like, a cult,
and cults are built with vulnerable players.
Hello, boys.
Good. Exactly who we need to speak to.
We’ve been talking.
Okay, what’s happening?
Well, plan A is you go win the thing.
Yeah.
If not, uh, vote for me, okay?
We were thinking, though, that if we did that,
that you could maybe pledge your undying allegiance to us.
Duh. That’s-- Obviously.
We’ll be such a solid team.
We like to hear that.
I don’t trust Wes, but I have joined Wes’ cult,
because I just don’t know how else to survive,
and I really don’t wanna go home this first elimination.
Like, that’s, like, embarrassing.
[Wes laughing]
[treacherous music]
Get out?
What do I say first?
-[doorbell ringing] -Hello?
Villains, you have a visitor.
-Uh-oh. -Get that damn door!
Who is it?
Who is that?
-Hello, hello, hello. -Oh, Janice Dickinson!
Hello, I’m Janice.
[doorbell ringing]
Is that the front door?
Hi.
-Hello, hello, hello. -Hello.
-Oh, Janice Dickinson! -Hello, I’m Janice.
Oh, I know.
Who doesn’t know about Janice Dickinson?
What’s her name? Janet?
-Janice Dickson? -Jennifer Dickinson?
I mean, she’s the ultimate top model of the world.
They’re all fat. The entire room is fat.
I’m fat. You’re all fat.
Yes, nice to meet you.
Janice Dickinson, the most villainous villain
in reality TV show history.
I don’t see a future with you. You’re too old to model.
I can even yell louder than you.
Shut the [bleep] up!
Joel couldn’t be here, so he sent me,
Janice Dickinson, the world’s first supermodel.
Yes, Janice!
I’m here to introduce your first Redemption Challenge.
So, I hear three of you are in the sh--er. Who’s that?
Aye-yi. Today’s Redemption Challenge is called
"The Hollywood of No Shame".
What?
It’s called "The Hollywood Walk of No Shame."
Today, all you need are your powers of persuasion
to shamelessly unite the masses of Hollywood Boulevard
in your favor.
You’ll have one hour to strut down the street
and convince as many people as you can
to sign your personal petition to get you off the Hit List.
When the time’s up, the villain with the most signatures
will be taken off the Hit List.
The remaining two will still be up for elimination.
That means you’re ----ed.
You’re doing great. Thanks.
Now, since this challenge is all about strutting your stuff,
and I’m known for judging people’s walks,
let’s see what you’re all working with.
Walk from there to the front door and back.
Okay.
All right, thank you. That was a terrible walk.
[laughing]
Ooh!
Very good, Larissa. Praise, slay, dance, prance.
That’s what I call a ten walk.
Very good.
Oh, oh.
[laughing]
Hey! Okay.
[Tiffany laughing]
I was just being HBIC with it.
I’ve seen enough of this stuff.
[laughing]
Okay, back to the challenge, everybody.
So basically, whoever gets the most signatures
on Hollywood Boulevard wins, got it?
You, you, and you, get ready.
I’m out of here.
-Bye-bye! -Bye!
All right, I’ll go that way.
-Ooh, may the best queen win. -May the best queen win!
[grunting]
Walking into the Redemption Challenge,
my strategy is to get into some quick drag,
because people and drag queens are like moths to a fire.
♪
Okay, Kandy.
Stun, bitch!
-Oh, my. -Excuse me.
I’m gonna go for the groups.
Get the fans, get the people that are not my fans.
Everyone on Hollywood Boulevard, they gotta come sign
this paper, because I cannot go home.
Oh, my-- I love that outfit.
Mm-hmm.
♪
I do feel a little nervous, because whenever
people are petitioning for signatures, I never stop.
So, I’m a little scared karma might get me.
I don’t know how to draw lips. [bleep]
Ugh! Just go inside, mother----er!
[laughing]
♪
Okay.
I need to make pee.
-[bell tolling] -Get in, losers!
It’s time for your walk of no shame.
Hollywood, here we come.
Bye!
Bye-bye!
Can’t wait to see who wins.
Kandy looks like she wants it.
You didn’t see how she got up and went, got ready, boom,
down here with the sign.
Vicky, she’s bubbly,
quirky, gives a little ditzy, funny, Valley girl vibe.
Larissa is giving, what?
-Jugging. Jugging. -She’s just jugging.
♪
[dramatic music]
We’re in the middle of the ----ing game now.
Hollywood Boulevard, ha-ha.
I love it.
Going through this Redemption Challenge,
but the reality is,
I am going through it, I’m lightheaded,
I want to throw up, thinking to myself, why me?
Why am I in the bottom?
♪
Let’s go!
Coming up...
Don’t try to pick a fight with me, provoke me this whole time.
No one is trying to provoke you!
Go [bleep] yourself!
No, let me ----ing talk because now you’ve pissed me off.
Shut up!
♪
I am feeling a bit nervous,
because I know I’m a pawn in the game
and the boys say that they will have my back,
but no one is safe in this game.
You guys ready? Let’s go!
-Okay. -[airhorn blowing]
Free hugs? [cheering]
♪
Won’t you give me your signature?
Divas, I need you to sign my petition,
print and sign, so that I don’t get eliminated.
Would you help me to bring awareness for the breast cancer?
And sign just a paper for me?
-No. -Okay.
Just print your name and then sign your name.
Can you come sign this?
[bleep]
I need you to come print and sign a petition for me.
-Okay. -Yeah?
Oh, my gosh, Kandy’s, like, running and getting people.
Thank you, baby!
I’m running up and down Hollywood Boulevard looking
like a maniac, but here’s the thing, as drag queens,
that’s what we do, we make it work, we have a good time.
Who doesn’t want to be near a drag queen,
especially looking like this? [chuckling]
[sighing]
Won’t you sign for me and help me?
Can you please come sign my thing? Thank you.
My strategy is only to go a short distance,
and just sign really quick, have them feel the energy,
the excitement of the cameras.
Thank you!
She’s gonna win!
♪
Larissa’s going for strolls.
Hey, would you give me a signature?
[bleep]
Hey, Raider Nation, would you help me
to bring awareness for the breast cancer?
And just give me a signature, I’m a Raider Nation too.
I don’t--
Really? You’re broken my heart.
Woo! Baby’s hot!
-Thank you so much. -Ain’t you on "90 Day Fiancé"?
Yeah, would you help me sign for me?
No, you want to sign mine.
No, she’s already going to sign for the breast cancer.
You sure you don’t want to sign for me?
Yes, it is me! It is! You want something-- Ah, girl!
I’mma come sign you.
From the hood to Hollywood!
From the hood to Hollywood, baby!
Yes, it is! Oh, I’m pleased. Okay. Y’all.
Everyone loves Kandy.
Oh, my God!
I need you to come sign my petition.
Come, come, come, come, come, come, come.
-Come here. -It really is Kandy Muse.
Yes, okay, yeah, look.
I’m really happy that all the fans
are here at Hollywood Boulevard.
Print and sign.
But here’s the thing. We have one hour
on the clock, and everyone wants to sign,
-and then also a selfie. -Cute!
Every selfie is a minute away from the clock.
Thank you!
-Thank you, baby. -Thank you very much.
-Good luck. -Thank you.
♪
I just love talking to you.
Seriously, no, look, look, I know you, like, we’re cool,
but, like, I’m such a fan of you.
You’re so inspiring to me. Can I have a kiss?
[chuckling]
-I’m sorry. -I’ll be upstairs.
No, no, no, no, no.
Thank you so much. You just write your name and sign.
Signature to bring awareness for breast cancer.
Why are people in LA so mean?
At Hollywood Boulevard, people are selfish,
people really are dead inside,
and they even want to sign for the breast cancer.
I thought it was good strategy.
Would you help me give me your signature to the veterans?
Yeah, just in here, just for TV show.
Yeah, but I’m gonna help you then
afterwards of the TV show.
Oh, sorry.
Okay, thank you.
Thank you, babies.
I just need you to sign it.
No. Why?
I am so determined to get signatures.
[speaking Spanish]
Hola, hola. Um...
I need to win this.
Okay, look at my tiara.
Come!
Cheating!
So cute. Write your name, and then you sign it.
Thank you so much. Yay!
You’ll help me? Yay. Okay, thank you!
I’m catching up.
[whistling]
Anyone who’s not on the Hit List is gonna take
this opportunity to take a nap, lounge by the pool.
Not me.
You want to talk?
While these others are out of the house, I’m clocking in.
So, I saw you from afar, almost early,
as someone that I wanted to work with.
-Mm-hmm. -I want to work with
a very, very small amount of people,
who are very organized and methodical.
So we have to be very, very smart, because
you’re a threat to people.
What I’m proposing is that we’re each other’s number ones.
Yeah. It sounds-- sounds like a good plan.
I don’t trust the man as far as I see him,
but I think Wes is a great player.
So, of course, I told Wes what he wants to hear.
-All right, shake on it? -Yeah.
-Deal. -Deal.
All right, one minute!
-[clock beeping] - Last minute!
-Just a signature, just one. -Oh, a signature? Yeah.
Okay, come here, please.
Whoever gets the most wins.
Thank you. One, two, three.
Put it away, bitch.
I’m just counting.
Me and Kandy are neck and neck.
Kandy has a ton of fans that came up to her,
wasting time, and hopefully that works in my favor.
-Thank you. -Thank you, baby.
♪
Thank you so much.
Oh, my God, I might win.
Hello?
Thank you.
-My last one. -Please, can you help me?
♪
I swear, while I was asleep,
I heard Kandy say, "I won, bitch!"
-I’m psychic if it happens. -Oh, my God.
Yo, the truck just pulled up.
Oh, they’re here.
I need my jacket.
Victoria doesn’t look happy.
What happened? Hello!
Safaree! Read ’em and weep, bitch!
Baby!
I dreamed this! I dreamed this! I told you, I’m psychic!
I can, um, see things before they happen.
I got 81.
34.
I got 87.
I don’t want people to be freaked out by my gift.
-Wow! -That’s a lot!
I’m off the Hit List, and now I can go up
to my room and unpack my bags.
Bye! [laughing]
How’d you do?
Why did you lie to them? That’s so weird.
Do you know how crazy that is going to look?
Girl, you should put the sign down and start going like this.
What is this? Oh, my God!
-What you mean, honey? -Now, who dressed--
Bro, trust. Put this on.
Production’s going to love this look on you.
♪
This could be a black hairline right here.
Larissa was, like, telling people,
like, sign this for breast cancer.
-Who wrote that? -Larissa!
No, she did not.
Yes, she’s a villain.
No, like, that’s actually ----ed up.
-Like, don’t lie about cancer. -Listen...
-You appreciate... -I’m one person.
It’s a group of people out there.
You need to convince the people here.
I’m going to try to talk to people,
but I’m not going to try to beg.
They’re going to do whatever they want at the end.
Congratulations, one more time.
Thank you, baby.
Oh, thank you.
♪
So, what y’all thinking? Cause...
Well, what do you want?
My mind is made up, but I will switch if you guys.
It’s what you said earlier. That’s it.
So, what did you say earlier?
-Send Larissa home. -I don’t know.
I think Vicky is more dangerous.
I don’t want to rock the boat in the game,
but Victoria, at this point for me, is torture.
So, I want Victoria to go home and work on her journey.
Wow, look at all your shoes.
I know. I might have overpacked a little bit,
but I just have every different color outfit.
I’m like, well, something’s bound to go with something.
-So fun. -Right?
Look, here’s the real tea.
Larissa is my homegirl in this competition, and I think
that there’s a common denominator in this house,
and that’s my roommate, that’s Victoria.
I would love more closet space.
Okay.
[Kandy laughing]
But now, she’s serving a purpose.
Yeah, and she’s earned her space.
Where’s Larissa? I can’t see her.
I just know that when it gets down to five,
you know who the five are gonna be?
Jessie, Wes, Rich, four, five.
I really got your back.
We have joined forces, honey.
New York, you know, she has a special place in my heart.
I really care about New York.
She got my back, got her back.
I’m engaged and a fiancé, and I’m waiting to see
what we’re gonna do, because I want to give him
one more year to make up his mind to marry me,
-or I have to go. -How long y’all been together?
Six years, engaged for three and a half.
Listen, you know you’re special to me.
Oh, God.
I just want you to know that.
Thank you, Safaree.
Because I know you meant that.
I know.
Oh, [bleep]! Don’t play with me!
Safaree has a sweet spot for New York still,
for sure, 1,000%.
Is it, though? I mean...
Oh, man! See?
I trust you. I trust you. Oh.
What have we got going on over there?
What’s going on?
-We’re talking about-- -We’re just strategizing about--
We’re talking about height.
Oh, yeah.
-No, for real. -Height?
Yeah, because I’m just, like, seeing,
like, things down here.
Uh-oh.
What are you gonna wear for dinner?
This, no?
-It’s in the house. -Yeah, you think?
Should we all wear our furs?
No, because we’re home.
-Okay. -Yeah, yeah, we’re home.
I’m, like, kind of beat from today.
I know.
She got 34, I got 81, he got 87.
You guys should want to keep me,
because if I’m on your team, I’m competitive, I can help.
Tonight’s the first banishment ceremony,
and I’m keeping my cards close to me.
But Victoria reminds me of my daughter,
so I feel closer to Victoria.
I just think we all have to pick someone if it happens, so...
-It is what it is. -Yeah.
Can I have a minute to talk to you?
I saw you. Yes, of course you can.
See, I’m quiet, Tiffany.
It’s not because, like, give it up.
Some clams take longer to open.
I’m telling you, I will fight with a fork.
If it’s a good clam, I’ll just keep...
until that sucker pops.
And that was me.
I take a long time to kind of open up, warm up,
and you shouldn’t be penalized for that.
Right now, I even know what she’s talking about.
You know, my book is just not wide open,
and I’m in everyone’s faces.
She’s talking no sense,
and I believe she’s legally insane.
Tiffany, when I think about her, I think about a villain.
You need to be true for yourself.
You understand?
Yes, yes.
Let me tell you something, Miss Larissa.
I respect a good frame and a large tit.
I’ve always been a tit girl.
I love ’em huge. The bigger, the better.
I felt Tiffany was like, yes, girl, you have my vote.
Hey, T, Liss, I don’t want to interrupt real quick,
but just when you’re ready, dinner’s served on the table.
Thanks, Kandy. We’ll come in right now.
Guys, come eat.
Okay, this is done.
Teresa, this place smells divine.
Oh, my goodness.
Everyone’s here.
Looks so pretty, Teresa.
Enjoy your dinner.
Thank you for this beautiful spread.
Bon appétit.
Mmm.
So tell me how it is. Is it good?
Flavorful.
Yeah? I mean, it’s pretty easy to make.
You just gotta season it and put it in the oven.
Enough protein for you, Pec?
Yes, yes.
Jessie just kind of moved around his plate
and nothing went in his mouth,
so who knows what he really thought of what you made.
Awkward.
I had two slices of it.
Jess, I would never get mad.
Okay, it was a little salty for my taste!
Did anybody say anything bad?
Uh, it’s horrible.
It tasted like a salt lick.
Teresa definitely should rely on caterers
and private chefs moving forward.
[bleep] them.
-[bell tolling] -Villains,
it’s time to get ready for your first banishment ceremony.
Where one of you will be declared
persona non grata by the house.
Excommunicado, bitches!
Thanks for the roast, gotta go.
Be downstairs in one hour.
[quietly screeching]
I am so nervous going into the banishment ceremony.
I mean, I’m trusting the people who gave me their word,
but this is "House of Villains",
you just never know what they’re really thinking.
Coming up...
My lord.
Um...
[gasping]
Wait. That’s why you were scared?
Safaree, I had gone to his room
and now I’ve supposedly pissed off Rich,
and he says I’m entitled.
You excited?
I am. You know I’m excited because
I’m not on the hit list anymore tonight.
[groaning]
And that’s how you know you did it correctly.
Thank you.
[tense instrumental]
You want to keep Victoria or you want to keep Larissa?
Victoria.
I’d prefer Victoria to go.
Well, you’re safer with Larissa because
you’ve done a very good job diversifying--
I’ve done that with all kinds of people,
just because that’s who I am.
But I’ll do it with you, I’ll do it with everybody.
So you’re saying you’re very impressive at this game?
-I am. -Uh-oh.
And a threat.
But you’re pretty much in charge, it seems.
Of what?
You know damn well I’m very aware of
what you’re doing and playing and I don’t care.
I won’t be mad at any of you guys,
regardless of how you vote.
Certainly, Wes feels he can play these games well,
but I will make sure that it’s Victoria who goes.
There’s nobody who’s better than me.
That’s just stupid. [laughing]
What was the conversation about over there?
Is everybody still on the same ----ing page
or is everybody shifting or what?
Listen, the idea that Victoria is reliable isn’t real.
[quietly screeching]
And Larissa, I’d rather vote for her to stay
and if you’re willing to do that.
But, it’s like who can I really trust--
I think Larissa, that’s my point.
There’s the bottom line.
Originally, I was trying to get Victoria out
because she was just such a bitch,
but now that I’m working with Wes on the low,
I don’t know.
Whatever-- what do you need? You mean like to put them on?
-Yeah. Just the buckles. -Yeah. Okay. Uh-huh.
I’ve never been to a sports game.
Really? Never’s too late.
The first time I went to the football game,
the guy say, I love you.
What I love most, they are family-oriented people.
Where?
In Vegas, there’s family-oriented people?
I didn’t know.
I love Vegas.
Boo, Raiders!
-What happened? -I’m the clown.
Boo, Raiders!
Am I barking or are you yelling?
I’m not barking.
-In my lane? -Yeah.
[imitating screeching wheels] No.
----ing eat this, bitch.
-Okay. -Sorry.
No, no, you’re okay.
I can’t bend down with this dress.
Well, whose fault is that?
No, I don’t wanna grow up.
[others chuckling]
I don’t have respect for you. Sorry.
I missed that last part.
[baby talk] Sorry!
Thank you.
-No, no, no, cross it first. -Oh, Jesus.
Yeah, cross it like that, and then around the ankle.
I want Victoria to go home.
Who do you want to go home?
Why are you so angry? It’s a game.
Don’t let me go away.
Bye-bye.
Go [bleep] yourself.
Wes, I can talk Wes to keep Larissa.
Victoria going into a banishment ruffling feathers
is such horrific gameplay.
Best of luck. You’re gonna need it.
[Larissa chuckling]
You have an evil laugh.
No one is trying to provoke you.
No, let me ----ing talk.
Now you’ve piss me off. Shut up.
Lady!
Oh, my goodness.
Let’s save some of that energy for the stronghold, shall we?
It is time for your banishment ceremony.
Now head through the bookcase immediately.
Baby, it’s time for elimination!
Y’all heard the voice?
There was just so much that happened
in the last 30 minutes. I’m so confused.
♪
There they are.
Look at this. Yeah.
All right. Oh, hi, New York.
-Hi, Joel. -Oh, hi.
Look at you.
There he is, King of the villains.
♪
Villains!
Welcome to your first banishment ceremony.
Reveal the chairs!
[epic, tense instrumental]
[music sadly winds down]
[distant coughing]
Reveal the chairs!
All right, here we go, here we go!
Oh, oh!!
[heavy thuds]
-Oh, that is heavy. -They appear to be safe.
Wait. That’s why you were scared?
Bringing back memories, yeah.
[screaming]
Larissa, Victoria,
one of you will be leaving us tonight
and missing out on the chance to win $200,000.
Please stand in front of our new and improved prop chairs.
Victoria, do you have anything you want to say?
I’m so grateful to be here.
This is like a dream come true, and I hope my time hasn’t ended.
I want to share so many more experiences.
I’m not an angel, but I admit my -----ups.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Wrong show, honey. This is not "The Bachelor".
I hope that I get to stay.
Larissa, do you have anything to say?
Yes.
Okay. Larissa, what was that Bible verse you said?
What verse? In what verse? What Bible?
[laughing]
Amen.
[choral singing]
-[chuckling] -Villains, it is time to vote.
Jessie, you are going to be the first person
to head to our secret voting booth.
Go ahead and take a seat, guys.
Victoria has two brain cells
and sometimes they do not work together.
-Chairs look new this evening. -Oh, they’re super nice.
Gah. This is super hard to do.
I already gave Victoria my actual word.
♪
Victoria, girl.
Bye.
Larissa, make sure you’re wearing a bra
because when you fly out of here in that chair,
you’re gonna get two black eyes, sweetheart,
because those titties are gonna just
bust you all up in your grill.
Okay, guys. The votes are in.
And by the magic of technology,
they have been transmitted to my tablet right here.
Give me a moment to complete today’s Wordle.
And...
-[typing] -And...
I’m a genius.
With a vote of 5-2...
the first villain to be banished from the house is...
Larissa!
Bye.
I feel like they choose the wrong person.
Victoria is gonna backstab them the first opportunity.
Safar, hello.
Be careful who are feeding your area.
That’s it. Bye, House of the Villain.
♪
Raider Nation!
Y’all, [bleepp] the Raiders.
Larissa, you are the lesser of two evils.
[screaming]
Well, there you have it, guys.
That is our first banishment ceremony.
My lord.
Um...
[gasping]
Bye, House of the Villains.
Next on "House of Villains"...
Tempers are flaring.
I think people need to wake the [bleep] up!
Everybody’s on edge.
Oh, they’re playing games.
And this is my mother---ing house.
We’re throwing you a ’70s-themed fiesta.
This party is actually your Battle Royale challenge.
What?
You a crafty [bleep].
-You a crafty bitch. -We worked it out. We’re fine.
[bleep] y’all.
Behold, the dreaded knock-blocker.
Is this part of the show?