(bugs chirping) (animals calling)
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(low snarling)
(bugs chirping) (animals calling)
(low snarling)
(bugs chirping) (animals calling)
(low growling)
(aggressive screeching)
(metal music)
(metal music) (indistinct singing)
(metal music) (vocalist laughing)
(metal music)
♪ (indistinct) life ♪
♪ Minus the lies ♪
♪ We're all just part of a flock of shame ♪
♪ Forced plight, unable to fight ♪
(soft singing drowned out by music)
♪ (indistinct), minus the lies ♪
♪ We're all just part of a flock of shame ♪
(metal music) (indistinct singing)
(metal music) (vocalist screaming)
(bugs buzzing)
(alarm wailing)
(static hissing)
(upbeat music)
Hello everyone, I'm Cleve Blinkman,
and welcome to the evening news.
Mitch, we have some disturbing news.
Why don't you get right to it?
Disturbing is an understatement.
A black cougar escape from a Los Angeles County lab
and it's still on the loose.
Be careful out there, people.
(upbeat music)
(static hissing)
[Eric] This is the beautiful Mandy right here.
Hey guys, I've missed you.
So we're over here and we're about to go
and enjoy my first meal as a breatharian.
[Eric] Oka, can you talk about your outfit today
and what you're wearing?
My outfit?
[Eric] Yeah.
No, no, I'm just kidding.
Of course.
No, actually, no, I wasn't prepared for that.
You have not signed me up for that.
No, no no, no, no.
[Eric] Come on, babe.
Just say it.
Say what you're wearing.
Look at this beautiful fur coat you've got on.
Well, that is true.
This is a leopard coat.
[Eric] There you go.
And those boots, look at those.
[Mandy] These boots were actually a gift
from a friend of mine who's a singer.
[Eric] Wow, okay.
And what about that beautiful necklace?
[Mandy] That necklace was an actual find.
[Eric] Tell me that's not beautiful.
Look at her.
All right, let's go.
We're making our way up.
She's about to cross.
I think it's fine.
You just go over it however.
[Eric] Yeah, there you go.
I can't, I don't know how to do that.
[Eric] How do we do this?
Oh, yeah, over here, over here.
Over here.
We're going to the mountain
so we can breathe some fresh air, guys.
There we go, all right.
Oh my God.
They did not design these mountains for heels.
Yeah.
There we go.
We're good.
Yeah, we're off.
Hey guys.
Hi, I'm Eric.
Hey, it's Mandy.
I'm so happy to be here with you guys!
Thanks for watching.
Yeah, how many followers are we up to right now?
150,000 followers.
And I'm grateful for every single one of you.
I'm doing this challenge just for you,
so this is my first day as a breatharian
and I came up here to have my first meal in the mountains.
So it's really, you know, it's like a air salad.
Air salad.
Yeah.
That's what I'm going with.
Yeah? - Yeah.
It's really actually like a way more spiritual journey
than just eating air.
You know, I did want my first meal to be delicious
and I figured coming up to the mountains
is kind of like a air salad, you know,
like all the leaves and stuff.
[Eric] Yeah.
But like, it actually is a lot deeper than that.
[Eric] Can you like describe the taste
of what air salad tastes like?
Let me see.
Up here, kind of like lettuce.
[Eric] Lettuce, guys, you heard it first.
It tastes like lettuce.
[Eric] Look at this.
Look at this, beautiful.
Wow.
Hey guys.
So here I am in nature.
Now I'm officially having my first breatharian meal.
Okay, so the way I'm gonna do this
is through a meditation called hong-sau.
So this meditation is actually for your heart chakra
and when you do it,
you're actually gonna say hong-sau in your mind.
So when you breathe in, you think of the word hong,
and when you breathe out, you think of the word sau.
So I'm inviting you to join me in a meditation
and take a moment and get your peace.
And let's begin.
(cougar snarling)
What the hell was that?
(footsteps crunching dirt) (birds chirping)
Hey guys, we are officially like 13 minutes in.
Yes, to being a breatharian.
Starting our whole spiritual life,
making room for all the beautiful things in the world.
It's just great.
(cougar snarling)
What was that?
I mean, it's probably like a squirrel or something.
Like, we're in nature.
A squirrel doesn't make that big of a noise.
I'm gonna go check it out.
Here. - Okay.
It was over here, right?
Yeah, I mean, it's just a freaking squirrel.
You're so dramatic.
It's okay, but thank you!
My hero!
Guys, it's been like five minutes
and Eric hasn't come back and I just,
I feel like this was like a really super bad idea.
Like, I thought I could be a vegetarian.
Well, actually a breatharian,
but I feel like a big fraud.
Like, I've never even been to the mountains before.
So like, I don't know.
And there's all these noises and I don't know what it means.
And there's, I dunno.
There's something coming.
(Mandy screaming)
I knew this was gonna happen.
I knew it!
I told him and he didn't listen.
I've gotta stop this.
(ominous music)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music) (cougar snarling)
I should be there in about 15 minutes
if I cut through the woods.
Dude, that's fake news.
Besides, I won't mess it up this time.
I promise you.
(phone beeping)
Fucking moron better not fuck this up!
(baby crying)
Hey, shut the damn door, bitch!
I need some damn privacy here!
Can't upset the boss, no.
Wouldn't want to do that, now would we?
(upbeat music)
Time for blast off!
The cougar is whacked out on coke,
so he'll probably be crashing soon,
which will be our opportunity to nab hi
before he makes it downtown.
As long as he doesn't come across any blow in the meantime,
our plan should work.
No, no, no, no.
Not that kind of cougar.
Not the one, the hairy kind.
Come on, you know what I mean!
(knocking on wall)
I gotta call you back.
Trouble in paradise?
Nothings to be worried about, my love.
How about give daddy some sugar?
(ominous music)
(upbeat music)
(cougar snarling)
(soft music)
(cougar snarling)
(ominous music)
Hello, is anyone out there?
(intense music)
Fuck this noise.
(cougar snarling)
(Gus screaming)
(intense music)
(cougar snarling)
Stupid motherfucker!
I knew you'd keep me dry again.
(upbeat music)
And this is just in, two local friends were attacked
by the escaped cougar on the outskirts of town
near the Los Angeles National Forest.
Also in that same area, known reputed drug dealer,
Gus Chris, was also attacked and killed.
And interestingly, cocaine residue was found
at the death scene.
Huh, douche bag.
(phone dings)
Too scary.
(phone dings)
Hmm, too fat.
(phone dings)
Oh, too ugly.
(phone dings)
Ooh, mama's boy.
(phone dings)
Water sports.
Mm, no thanks.
(phone dings)
Oh, hmm, I knew I'd find you on here.
Ooh, yes.
All right, all right.
Now, go fetch me my blow.
It's gonna be a long night.
Yes, daddy.
I mean, boss.
Coming right up.
Talk about a cougar
Oh.
Oh, Francis, I can't wait.
Daddy is going to get some sugar today.
Mm, ah.
(group screaming)
(rollercoaster whirring)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
(cougar snarling)
(soft ominous music)
Oh my gosh, what was that?
(cougar snarling)
Francis?
It must be him.
Come on, Francis, come here.
(cougar snarling)
(intense music)
(Jeff screaming in distance)
That doesn't sound good.
Jeff, is that you?
Are you okay?
(intense music)
Where are you?
(intense music)
(cougar snarling)
(intense music)
Just couldn't wait for me, could ya?
(cougar snarling)
(Francis screaming)
(flesh ripping)
(cougar snarling)
(gentle music)
New developments in the escaped Cougar.
What did we learn, Cleve?
Yes, well, the escape cougar came from Ferguson Labs
and that lab recently fell under investigation
for its involvement of experiments on animals with cocaine.
Very concerning.
(static hissing)
(ominous music)
(car honking)
(upbeat music)
(car honking)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music) (indistinct singing)
(upbeat music)
Hey bro.
Slater, where you at?
Send me the GPS of your location.
All right?
All right, see you soon.
(ominous music)
That was a lot of fun.
It was a lot of fun.
Thanks for taking me.
Call me when you get home?
Okay.
Bye. - Bye.
(ominous music)
(twigs crunching)
(intense music) (cougar snarling)
(intense music)
(ominous music)
(intense music)
(cougar snarling)
Hello?
(intense music)
(intense music) (cougar snarling)
Take us to the latest developments
in the escaped cougar case, Cleat.
Well, animal control is on high alert
and asking if you spot the cougar in your area,
do not approach him.
Instead, call 911.
(static hissing)
(cougar snarling)
(cars honking)
Oh, shit!
Honey.
Honey, hear me out.
Now, listen to me.
I know I say some wild stories sometimes
and I might be a little kooky, but listen to me this time.
There's a cougar outside.
A cougar?
Yeah, with the...
A cougar like Mrs. Lynch down the hallway?
Is that who you're talking about?
No, no.
It was like a real-
Yes, she's a real cougar.
She's an old lady who hits on younger men
and you need to stop fucking talking to her.
How many times did we talk about this?
No, no, honey.
Bob, I'm serious.
This is fucking crazy!
(intense music)
(cougar snarling softly)
What the?
That looks like a cocaine bear.
Fuck, no, that's a fucking cocaine cougar!
Shit!
(cougar snarling)
Hello, animal patrol?
Yes, hello, I'd like to report a cougar.
Yeah, it's large, black.
It's got paw.
It growls.
What?
What do you mean?
No, it's a feline.
It's a big cat.
No, not that kind of cougar.
That's why I'm in a situation right now.
No, no, no, no, no.
It's not sexy or flirtatious.
No, it's a real cougar.
Please just come down to 1516 Sycamore.
Yes, 1516 Sycamore.
Thank you.
Where is she?
Hey Guy, thank you so much.
That was awesome.
[Guy] Oh, no problem.
I'll send you the negatives later.
Yeah, I wanna see him. I love the shirt.
Oh, thank you.
Just fucking hot.
(intense music)
(cougar snarling)
(intense music)
Mrs. Lynch?
Yes, who are you?
I'm Bob McAllister's wife.
We live next door.
Oh, the one who won't wear short dresses.
Listen bitch, stop fycking talking to my husband, okay?
Oh, I'm not really interested in him.
He's too old.
Yeah good, then find men your own age.
Leave him the fuck alone, okay?
He's spending money on me.
He actually bought me this outfit.
He's not spending money on you.
This is getting really annoying.
It's getting absolutely ridiculous.
What is that?
(Mrs. Lynch screaming)
Honey?
Honey!
(Bob breathing heavily)
Oh, oh, oh boy.
Oh, oh.
(Bob screaming)
(intense music)
(ominous music)
(cougar snarling)
Is someone there?
(cougar snarling)
(person screaming)
Yeah, I heard something about that on the news.
It's fine, I'm on my way home now.
Yeah, I'll let you know when I get there.
All right, later.
(ominous music)
(car dinging)
(rock music)
(cougar snarling)
(rock music)
What the hell?
(rock music) (cougar snarling)
Holy shit!
(rock music) (cougar snarling)
(person screaming)
(car exploding)
(cougar snarling)
(? Sniffing)
I'm gonna find you.
And I'm gonna kill you!
I'm going to find this fucking cougar
and I'm going to fucking kill it!
No one fucks with Shredder's stash!
(cars honking)
(ominous music)
(cougar snarling)
(ominous music)
(upbeat music)
Wait, honey!
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
(soft music)
(ominous music)
(upbeat music)
(bugs buzzing)
(metal music)
(metal music) (indistinct singing)
(metal music) (vocalist laughing)
(metal music)
♪ (indistinct) belief ♪
♪ Minus the lies ♪
♪ We're all just part of a flock of shame ♪
♪ Forced plight, unable to fight ♪
(soft singing drowned out by music)
♪ (indistinct), minus the lies ♪
♪ We're all just part of a flock of shame ♪
(metal music) (indistinct singing)
(metal music) (vocalist screaming)
(intense music)