1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:30,196 --> 00:00:30,822 You're ok. 4 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:34,117 Today's a good day. Today's a good day for you. 5 00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:37,579 Today's a good day for you. 6 00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:40,040 You're going to church. 7 00:00:40,498 --> 00:00:45,003 You're not gonna use today, you're not gonna use today. 8 00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:04,624 Hey hey hey 9 00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:08,169 Heroin, heroin, heroin, heroin. 10 00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:10,630 That's hard to say- Heroin. 11 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:12,257 Meth. 12 00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:15,760 Just start a commercial with meth. 13 00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:19,472 Can't get serious. 14 00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:24,185 Heroin, pain pills. Are you addicted? 15 00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:26,646 Are you addicted? 16 00:02:26,688 --> 00:02:29,649 If I wanted heroin and I was sitting here 17 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:32,652 and had nothing to do, my brain would go into full blown 18 00:02:32,694 --> 00:02:34,863 "how do we get heroin" planning mode. 19 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,282 I was married. I was married. 20 00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:40,118 I had a bright future. 21 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,537 Whereas if I've got some kind of artistic or 22 00:02:42,662 --> 00:02:47,959 creative outlet, then I can say, let's table that thought about heroin 23 00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:50,920 and let's edit a video. 24 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:56,718 Hi, my name is Josh Litton. I had a bright future. 25 00:02:56,759 --> 00:03:00,972 Then what started out as fun soon became tragedy. 26 00:03:01,097 --> 00:03:04,934 Then what started out as fun and soon became a tragedy. 27 00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:24,913 It's gonna be a good year. Making a short film about recovery. 28 00:03:24,954 --> 00:03:27,040 You know, gonna... 29 00:03:27,081 --> 00:03:29,375 go to meetings, find a sponsor. 30 00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:35,715 It's gonna be a good year. 31 00:03:38,259 --> 00:03:40,220 It's gonna be a good year. 32 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,186 Movies have always just been a place 33 00:03:48,228 --> 00:03:54,192 for me to escape reality and, you know, just get lost in a world. 34 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:57,070 I love movies. 35 00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:07,747 We pray for more of you and less of us, Lord. 36 00:04:07,789 --> 00:04:10,917 Pray for your blessing over this script that we're writing, God. 37 00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:11,960 Pray that me and Josh just continue 38 00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:16,965 to grow as filmmakers so that our hearts and minds are always fixed on the real 39 00:04:17,006 --> 00:04:20,885 agenda here: to tell our stories in a way that helps people and gets them off 40 00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:22,929 drugs and alcohol addictions, Lord. 41 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:27,350 People that are struggling with addiction, 42 00:04:27,392 --> 00:04:29,936 it's a hard place to be in and it's a very isolating place to be in. 43 00:04:29,978 --> 00:04:33,273 So I'm hoping that this could be something that can help people. 44 00:04:59,048 --> 00:05:00,842 The commercials and graduation videos, 45 00:05:00,883 --> 00:05:04,804 those are like our day jobs - projects that we make for the program, 46 00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:08,141 but on the fence, you know, that's personal. 47 00:05:14,522 --> 00:05:18,359 To me, this is all practice for making a real short film with actors. 48 00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:22,322 If I only get one shot at this I'm swinging for the fences. 49 00:05:25,241 --> 00:05:31,372 Now, you understand this is an 18-month-long, Christian faith-based ministry. 50 00:05:31,497 --> 00:05:33,374 Alright, that means that when you come 51 00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:36,252 here, you're committed to living here for 18 months. 52 00:05:36,377 --> 00:05:38,921 However, if you decide you want to leave, 53 00:05:38,963 --> 00:05:42,175 I'm going to do everything I can to try to encourage you to stay, 54 00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:46,012 because I want you to fulfill your commitment to overcome your struggle. 55 00:05:46,095 --> 00:05:49,891 Now, we would, first of all, contact your probation officer and let 56 00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:53,478 them know that you're leaving you'll pack all of your belongings up. 57 00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:58,024 Get ready and we will take you to the Interstate 85. 58 00:05:58,066 --> 00:05:59,484 There's a Waffle House there, we'll take you there 59 00:05:59,525 --> 00:06:01,527 because if you want to go somewhere, 60 00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:04,864 then we'll help you get to that point. 61 00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,330 So a few weeks goes by, I go to his house. 62 00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:17,585 I went to his house, I was so geeked up dude. The second I sit on his couch out, I hear SHINK 63 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:21,589 and I look up and he's got a revolver pointed right at my head. 64 00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,049 He's like 'you think I'm some kind of bitch? 65 00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,425 You think you can rob me? 66 00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:26,010 I know what you did!' 67 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:28,679 But he squeezed the trigger. 68 00:06:28,721 --> 00:06:32,266 And it went CLICK (whoa) and I saw the whole thing 69 00:06:32,308 --> 00:06:36,646 rotate and I saw the hammer hit, it was loaded and the gun did not go off. 70 00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:37,271 I don't know how. 71 00:06:37,647 --> 00:06:40,983 But as soon as it clicked, I smashed him in the face as hard as I could 72 00:06:41,025 --> 00:06:43,111 and I ran for my life right out that door 73 00:06:43,152 --> 00:06:45,613 right out here where I was parked and I bolted. 74 00:06:45,655 --> 00:06:47,990 He might still live there, I don't... 75 00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:51,035 Let's go knock on the door, let's go say 'hi' to him. 76 00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,287 Yeah man, it's insane. 77 00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:56,290 So if you had to give an elevator pitch 78 00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:59,335 for "On the Fence," what would that sound like? 79 00:06:59,460 --> 00:07:06,008 It's a movie about the first step in AA. The main character is realizing that they 80 00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:10,930 are an addict and he's accepting that fact. 81 00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:14,225 In the short film, 82 00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:21,023 the whole idea is the guys who are staying in the recovery center put family pictures 83 00:07:21,065 --> 00:07:24,235 on this fence, hopefully to keep them from leaving. 84 00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:27,738 A reminder - it'll be the last thing they see when they leave the property is their family, 85 00:07:27,780 --> 00:07:31,033 and the reason why they're getting sober. 86 00:07:33,035 --> 00:07:35,705 But this photo is already a little worn out. 87 00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:39,083 Looks like my mom and dad when they were still together. 88 00:07:42,420 --> 00:07:46,340 We don't like to admit that we have a drug problem or just deal with the reason why 89 00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:48,634 we have a drug problem, so we run a lot of times. 90 00:07:48,676 --> 00:07:50,720 I run a lot of times. 91 00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:51,762 Every time you run away, 92 00:07:51,804 --> 00:07:57,894 you usually hurt them probably just as much, if not more than you hurt yourself. 93 00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:31,385 Making movies and writing, 94 00:08:31,385 --> 00:08:35,932 it's like therapy for me, it makes me feel good because it gets all 95 00:08:35,973 --> 00:08:39,227 that nasty, crazy thoughts in my head out on paper. 96 00:08:39,435 --> 00:08:43,064 Until you have something worth holding on to, you're not going to let go of drugs 97 00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:46,192 like you have to find something that is more meaningful, 98 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,151 so that you can take the leap and let go of 99 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:51,280 the thing you don't want to let go of, to go grab something new and scary 100 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:53,908 and see if that holds you the way that drugs did. 101 00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:56,369 Are you the creator of that? That was really cool, man. 102 00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:57,662 Thanks. 103 00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:09,173 Oh shit! 104 00:09:12,426 --> 00:09:16,055 It's a scene that would be in a gas station like this. 105 00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:19,934 It's a short film and it's a guy that's leaving a rehab program that he's in. 106 00:09:19,976 --> 00:09:21,561 This would be perfect, actually. 107 00:09:21,602 --> 00:09:23,729 OK, well give us a call if you think of something you can do. 108 00:09:23,771 --> 00:09:25,439 We sure would appreciate it. 109 00:09:25,481 --> 00:09:27,275 You do it this time. I like it. 110 00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:28,401 You're the director, dammit. 111 00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:29,944 Shut up. 112 00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:33,155 We got a short film that we're making about recovery. 113 00:09:33,197 --> 00:09:34,323 Cassidy. 114 00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:37,076 I'm Josh. Pleased to meet you. 115 00:09:37,118 --> 00:09:38,786 Cool, we'll give him a call. 116 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:42,915 It's a low slash no-budget independent thing we're doing. 117 00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:45,001 This guy comes here to meet his mom 118 00:09:45,042 --> 00:09:50,131 who has been enabling him, and she decides not to enable him anymore. 119 00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:56,095 It's not a big set-up, you know it would be some lights and some actors... 120 00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:15,197 That's that Methamphetamine, you know what I mean? 121 00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,907 Methamphetamine. 122 00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:20,494 90 percent of them, I pulled myself with pliers. 123 00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:24,915 I'm a country boy, you know what I'm saying? 124 00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:31,047 Them things get lose, man, I'll grab the pliers HAA! Pull that thing out. 125 00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:43,934 God is stretching me right now with this film stuff, a lot of learning to do. 126 00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:47,855 I feel like I'm in over my head. 127 00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:53,736 -Why thank you, sir. -You're very welcome ma'am. 128 00:10:53,861 --> 00:10:55,988 -You have a good day now. -You too, stay outta trouble 129 00:10:56,113 --> 00:10:57,198 -I'm trying. 130 00:10:58,282 --> 00:10:59,075 I'm Jared Callahan, 131 00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:02,787 I'm a local film producer and I met the guys when they came 132 00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:06,874 to the film festival and Cassidy told me the two hour version of his life story. 133 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,503 And I'm all in. I mean, I have friends and family in recovery. 134 00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:11,796 I think these stories are important. 135 00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:14,048 So now I'm gonna help these guys craft their 136 00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:17,718 ideas into a makeable, hopefully professional short film. 137 00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,888 -Pete makes up excuse. -For taking the pills. 138 00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:23,516 -And then it ends with crazy like.. -I know it was you! 139 00:11:23,557 --> 00:11:26,018 Under his strength, kind of even like comes down. 140 00:11:26,060 --> 00:11:29,438 -Pushes him down. -Yeah, sure. Like a push-shove down. 141 00:11:29,939 --> 00:11:34,735 Had another brother get kicked out yesterday because... 142 00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:37,697 Because he failed a drug test. 143 00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:39,573 So that's... 144 00:11:39,615 --> 00:11:41,534 Kinda nerve-wracking and stressful. 145 00:11:41,659 --> 00:11:42,493 They found out that he had been doing 146 00:11:42,493 --> 00:11:47,373 crystal meth for a month and it was like their good friend Canyon, 147 00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:51,043 the one that they've been making videos and commercials with. 148 00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:56,173 So today, we're supposed to be going 149 00:11:56,215 --> 00:12:02,763 for the whole movie and my experts are having freak outs in the parking lot. 150 00:12:15,985 --> 00:12:19,572 A lot of you guys know what we've been up to a little bit with the short film. 151 00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:22,992 We thought maybe tonight we'd read you guys the script that we're working with. 152 00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:25,077 And then when we're done, seeing what 153 00:12:25,119 --> 00:12:28,456 experiences that you guys have actually had that are like this. 154 00:12:28,581 --> 00:12:33,169 Exterior, fence post, late afternoon, the last post is covered with hundreds 155 00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:36,547 of faded letters and pictures nailed into the wood. 156 00:12:39,341 --> 00:12:44,430 Kinda had a meltdown yesterday, my insecurities came out, you know, 157 00:12:44,472 --> 00:12:50,227 fear of failure, fear of rejection and not being good enough. 158 00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,688 "Until you prove that you can get clean, this 159 00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:55,941 family's done being a part of your life." Mother continues, 160 00:12:55,983 --> 00:13:01,113 "I thought my actions were loving you, but they were only feeding your addictions." 161 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:02,656 She begins to tear up. 162 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:05,951 "Now my actions will match my love for you." 163 00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:08,245 Pete backs away from the car and is in shock. 164 00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:13,083 The car starts and pulls out of the parking lot away down the road. 165 00:13:14,668 --> 00:13:19,215 This is a kind of a collection of several people's story. 166 00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:23,719 I have a very similar experience. 167 00:13:24,094 --> 00:13:29,058 It was Christmas, so I was doing drugs and drinking in this hotel room. 168 00:13:29,183 --> 00:13:32,812 They pull up and I go to get in the car thinking, let's go do Christmas. 169 00:13:32,895 --> 00:13:35,481 And they both get out and shut the door. 170 00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:39,735 And they have a very similar conversation with me. 171 00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:45,032 They gave me a present, which was like a sweater and said, "Love you, 172 00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:47,993 but, you know, we're done." 173 00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:53,290 Yeah, I identify with that story, 174 00:13:53,332 --> 00:13:57,253 you know, I got kicked out of my parents house when I was 19 because they decided 175 00:13:57,378 --> 00:14:01,590 to stop enabling me and after that I just went downhill real quick. 176 00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:07,596 I stole probably ten, twelve thousand dollars from them and used it on pot and cocaine. 177 00:14:07,638 --> 00:14:08,806 That's what drew me to it, you know, 178 00:14:08,848 --> 00:14:13,227 because it's easy to listen to somebody who's been walked in your shoes than to listen to somebody 179 00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:14,854 that's trying to tell you to do something, 180 00:14:14,895 --> 00:14:17,022 that ain't never walked in those shoes. 181 00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:19,608 What'll really help the movie is if we have Josh and Cassidy 182 00:14:19,650 --> 00:14:22,528 come and have you all write a letter to yourself and fold it up. 183 00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:25,781 I mean, if we can get copies of photos of you or you and your families, 184 00:14:25,823 --> 00:14:29,076 we're going to put them all up on a fence and make it look like when you come 185 00:14:29,118 --> 00:14:34,248 into this ministry, they make you write a letter to yourself. 186 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:40,337 It was captivating, it was interesting. 187 00:14:40,462 --> 00:14:45,551 I think it's gonna be, it may be in the theaters, I don't know 188 00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:53,601 So I talked to Brother John and I guess I'm gonna have to sign some kind of contract saying I won't relapse, 189 00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:55,895 and if I do relapse, 190 00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,688 then... 191 00:14:59,815 --> 00:15:02,943 Then I get kicked out of the ministry. 192 00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,211 I'm struggling because I think 193 00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:23,547 I might have a mental illness. 194 00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:26,926 That's why I'm gonna go on Prozac, to hopefully help me get through this. 195 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:34,558 So today I had to take a piss test, one a little more elaborate than usual. 196 00:15:34,808 --> 00:15:37,227 Why you wigging out, man? 197 00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:40,648 Where's Cassidy? 198 00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:45,027 Good old Cass. 199 00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:49,865 I don't know. 200 00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:55,704 Sometimes it's hard to vocalize everything, and my head just feels like a mesh. 201 00:16:01,168 --> 00:16:03,253 -This is Cass everybody. -What's up. 202 00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:05,756 -Action! -We don't know what we're doing. 203 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:08,842 Dammit, I'm the director this is what I want! 204 00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:11,804 Lesson learned, kids. 205 00:16:11,845 --> 00:16:14,556 -OK, dude, find the lighter. -I don't know where it went. 206 00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:18,560 Hey you still got some of that Dro? Can I get a 20 sack? 207 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,188 We don't smoke weed. 208 00:17:34,970 --> 00:17:38,640 Feel so uncomfortable right now, 209 00:17:38,682 --> 00:17:42,478 agitated, depressed, stressed 210 00:17:42,519 --> 00:17:45,147 I've been crying some and... 211 00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:51,862 This has gotta stop, man. I gotta get on with my freakin life, dude. 212 00:17:52,112 --> 00:17:56,366 Pull it together Cassidy. Life is not that bad. 213 00:17:56,825 --> 00:18:00,662 Life's not about your circumstance, you can be happy no matter what circumstance, 214 00:18:00,704 --> 00:18:04,833 and the good Lord says that, God says that I can be happy no matter my circumstance. 215 00:18:04,875 --> 00:18:08,545 Please, enlighten me. 216 00:18:21,975 --> 00:18:23,727 Tim Burton 217 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:27,773 See here's another... 218 00:18:27,815 --> 00:18:31,443 a story about socially awkward kid. 219 00:18:33,612 --> 00:18:34,655 I remember watching Edward Scissorhands 220 00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:39,910 over and over and over and over and over thinking, 'Hey I kind of feel like that dude.' 221 00:18:41,245 --> 00:18:45,249 What does snow mean? Cocaine. 222 00:18:45,415 --> 00:18:48,710 This actually premiered at the Atlanta Film Festival. 223 00:18:48,752 --> 00:18:51,880 Oh, Prozac nation. 224 00:18:51,922 --> 00:18:56,385 "Self-destructive behavior and paralyzing depression that reflects an entire 225 00:18:56,426 --> 00:19:00,764 generation's struggle to navigate the effects of divorce." 226 00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:05,769 I've dealt with that. "Drugs, sex and high expectations." 227 00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:07,271 Wow. 228 00:19:07,396 --> 00:19:12,317 I need to, I need to watch this pretty relevant to my life. 229 00:19:12,526 --> 00:19:16,613 After the divorce, I pretty much lived at a daycare 230 00:19:16,655 --> 00:19:20,951 with my brother and sister, and the only time that we got together 231 00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:24,830 with our family was on Friday nights we'd have tacos because they were cheap. 232 00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:28,000 And then a couple of movies from Blockbuster. 233 00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:43,932 This is a huge pain to do without help. 234 00:19:43,974 --> 00:19:47,561 This is definitely a two-man job. 235 00:19:57,112 --> 00:20:00,908 A Better Way Movers has taught me to be strong in the Lord. 236 00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:03,911 And to always be willing to help others. 237 00:20:03,952 --> 00:20:04,536 Cassidy really came up with all 238 00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:09,208 the concepts, and I shot it and did the lighting. 239 00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:14,546 Having another guy that is into the same stuff, you know, 240 00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:17,716 filmmaking and also a recovering drug addict, 241 00:20:17,758 --> 00:20:20,636 when you've got another person sitting four feet away from you that is 242 00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:24,723 in the same boat, and if I was struggling, he'd be the only the first and sometimes 243 00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:28,477 the only person that knew that I was struggling. 244 00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:42,908 So it's almost been a week, still kinda living out of the car a little bit 245 00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:49,248 and sleeping on the couch at my mom's and stepdad's place. 246 00:20:55,462 --> 00:21:02,386 Cass told me that he had relapsed, so he was evicted from the program 247 00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:09,893 and I feel it's a tragedy because when he uses I watch him circle the drain. 248 00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:13,230 You know he's going down even though he can't see it. 249 00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:16,817 So I like him much better when he's clean and sober. 250 00:21:18,527 --> 00:21:21,154 Shoot, it's great that Cass is here. 251 00:21:21,321 --> 00:21:23,865 You know it's cramped, it's small, but, 252 00:21:23,907 --> 00:21:27,202 you know, it's family, so whatever it takes. 253 00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:28,829 I'm Cassidy's little sister. 254 00:21:28,870 --> 00:21:30,831 My name's Raven. 255 00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:34,001 Yay. 256 00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:36,920 I haven't really known Cass all that well 257 00:21:36,962 --> 00:21:42,009 because he's been in and out of A Better Way for a very, very long time. 258 00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:43,010 I mean, 259 00:21:43,051 --> 00:21:46,555 I don't know, like when I stop to think about it, I'm like, oh my God, 260 00:21:46,596 --> 00:21:49,725 he's been in there for, like, half his life, it seems, you know. 261 00:21:50,642 --> 00:21:51,560 When you're a drug addict, 262 00:21:51,601 --> 00:21:57,607 you don't really think about other people, so it's up to them to change. 263 00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:09,703 Hello? 264 00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:12,331 Hey, Cassidy, it's Nathan, how are you doing? 265 00:22:12,456 --> 00:22:14,791 Hey what's up Nathan. Good, I'm doing good. 266 00:22:14,833 --> 00:22:19,004 You know how I told you we're going to have a meeting for the "On the Fence" short? 267 00:22:19,254 --> 00:22:21,465 -Yeah. -We feel like you should be a part of that 268 00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:23,550 because you helped write the script. 269 00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:26,053 I agree, I think so and 270 00:22:26,094 --> 00:22:28,805 I'm supposed to be the director. 271 00:22:29,014 --> 00:22:31,516 Right but a lot of things have changed. 272 00:22:31,558 --> 00:22:35,479 You and A Better Way aren't on like, workable terms and so... 273 00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:37,647 And if you can't be apart of the meetings, 274 00:22:37,689 --> 00:22:39,691 then how are you going to direct the film? 275 00:22:39,733 --> 00:22:43,570 Yeah, no, it's super important that I'm at those meetings, 276 00:22:43,695 --> 00:22:49,493 no doubt umm, and... I'm willing to talk to Brother John to try to work it out. 277 00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:51,370 Alright, call me as soon as possible. 278 00:22:51,411 --> 00:22:53,080 -Alright man, love you. -Love you, Cassidy. 279 00:22:53,121 --> 00:22:53,872 -Love you guys. -Bye. 280 00:22:54,206 --> 00:23:03,423 And I think that's why no one makes movies in rehab, because it's impossible. 281 00:23:03,882 --> 00:23:08,595 I understand that Brother John has some hang ups because I relapsed and he doesn't 282 00:23:08,637 --> 00:23:11,473 wanna put his guys in the ministry in that position. 283 00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:16,186 I'm worried that I'm gonna be the reason that "On the Fence" falls apart. 284 00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:18,397 Cassidy was -- I used to sit right here, 285 00:23:18,438 --> 00:23:23,235 he used to sit right here and we, we talked about ideas like this and we 286 00:23:23,276 --> 00:23:27,823 dreamed about ideas like this and it wouldn't exist without him. 287 00:23:27,864 --> 00:23:32,077 So I just I don't want to lose him in the... in the shuffle. 288 00:23:36,706 --> 00:23:38,667 -Now it is -OK. 289 00:23:41,044 --> 00:23:43,213 -Hi. -Hi. 290 00:23:43,255 --> 00:23:43,755 Nice to see you. 291 00:23:44,214 --> 00:23:50,971 The goal for today is to clean. I'll have mom point and and I will clean. 292 00:23:51,304 --> 00:23:53,557 You gotta make sure I'm in the frame. 293 00:23:53,598 --> 00:23:55,767 -You are. -OK 294 00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:03,024 That's my mom. Say hi. 295 00:24:03,066 --> 00:24:04,276 Hi. 296 00:24:04,317 --> 00:24:06,278 -How are you doing this morning? -I'm good. 297 00:24:06,319 --> 00:24:09,114 -I'm not working today. -Yay. 298 00:24:09,156 --> 00:24:11,199 So we should behave instead like God's 299 00:24:11,241 --> 00:24:14,786 Very own children adopted into his family, calling him father, 300 00:24:14,828 --> 00:24:17,372 dear Father. For his Holy Spirit speaks 301 00:24:17,414 --> 00:24:21,251 to us deep in our hearts and tells us that we are God's children. 302 00:24:21,376 --> 00:24:25,255 And since we are his children, we will share his treasures. 303 00:24:26,339 --> 00:24:29,134 I relapsed but I did not die. 304 00:24:30,302 --> 00:24:32,053 I believe things are gonna fail. 305 00:24:32,095 --> 00:24:35,515 I don't believe that I will succeed. 306 00:24:38,101 --> 00:24:42,022 So I gotta change that mindset and I'm gonna start believing that I'm gonna succeed. 307 00:24:42,063 --> 00:24:44,816 Start believing who I am in Christ again. 308 00:24:55,535 --> 00:24:57,078 Thanks bro. 309 00:25:00,123 --> 00:25:03,710 I sent three applications out today on the Internet. 310 00:25:03,752 --> 00:25:09,049 One is a driver delivering food and Starbucks and Taco Bell. 311 00:25:09,090 --> 00:25:13,595 I just need some kind of income to come in right now if I'm gonna be able to work on "On the Fence." 312 00:25:13,887 --> 00:25:14,804 In order not to pay for trash, 313 00:25:14,846 --> 00:25:22,103 we take our trash and dump it in some dumpsters at an apartment complex. 314 00:25:27,692 --> 00:25:30,987 I'm a good person who has an addiction problem. 315 00:25:31,029 --> 00:25:34,741 We can do this, I can do this. 316 00:25:44,709 --> 00:25:47,462 That's ridiculous, he looks just like his dad 317 00:25:49,881 --> 00:25:52,842 That looks just like Cassidy, dude. Dresses the same and everything. 318 00:25:52,884 --> 00:25:57,556 Just dorky Cassidy's a dork, I love him. 319 00:25:57,973 --> 00:26:01,643 I used to forge prescriptions and I'd call this Rite Aid. 320 00:26:01,685 --> 00:26:06,189 I'd call myself in some Hydrocodone or some Xanax. 321 00:26:06,439 --> 00:26:09,693 The pharmacists would get on and I'd say, "Hello, this is Dr. Kennerly 322 00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:10,694 I have a phone in for a patient." 323 00:26:10,735 --> 00:26:13,321 And they'd say, "Alright, one second," and you can hear them getting ready. 324 00:26:13,363 --> 00:26:14,656 Like, "OK, go ahead." And say, "Ok I've got here, 325 00:26:14,698 --> 00:26:22,914 Hydrocodone acetaminophen, 10 over 325, sig 1 tab, POQ6 PRN pain, number 40, four-zero, with zero refills, 326 00:26:22,956 --> 00:26:26,167 generics are approved." -"OK, great, thanks." 327 00:26:26,209 --> 00:26:27,085 "Thanks, have a great day." 328 00:26:27,127 --> 00:26:28,753 -"Bye." -"Bye." 329 00:26:29,170 --> 00:26:32,257 So I got away with that for like eight months. 330 00:26:32,299 --> 00:26:36,469 And then one day, as soon as I pull out of the parking lot, I got boxed in. 331 00:26:44,311 --> 00:26:47,105 I got arrested and charged with six different felonies. 332 00:26:47,147 --> 00:26:51,568 Somewhere in the neighborhood of 350 fraudulent prescriptions. 333 00:27:02,162 --> 00:27:06,124 So I was taken to Fulton County Jail and I spent some time there. 334 00:27:06,166 --> 00:27:12,756 I was given an offer to plea out to a lesser charge and go to rehab. 335 00:27:12,797 --> 00:27:16,968 I'm five months from graduating, but if I leave here prematurely, 336 00:27:17,010 --> 00:27:21,348 or if I'm kicked out, I could go to prison for 10 years. 337 00:27:38,031 --> 00:27:39,908 -Yooo! -Yoo! 338 00:27:39,949 --> 00:27:43,662 -You got your own chair. -This table is epic. 339 00:27:45,246 --> 00:27:47,290 I actually picked up a white chip yesterday. 340 00:27:47,415 --> 00:27:50,168 This is the first chip you get when you when you get clean. 341 00:27:50,210 --> 00:27:52,712 So basically, to me, this is like accountability. 342 00:27:52,754 --> 00:27:56,383 That means that I have to stay clean now. 343 00:27:56,966 --> 00:27:57,884 I'm Josh 344 00:27:58,051 --> 00:28:03,390 worked in the industry for a while. First movie I did, I was an intern on Fireproof. 345 00:28:03,431 --> 00:28:06,643 -And then I worked as a company grip on Courageous. -Cool. 346 00:28:06,685 --> 00:28:08,937 And then from there did a lot of independents. 347 00:28:08,978 --> 00:28:14,150 Was doing that, was married, and then the drugs just really kicked my butt. 348 00:28:14,901 --> 00:28:19,364 So Cassidy's not allowed to be on the property or here in the office because 349 00:28:19,406 --> 00:28:23,702 of his relapse, so we've asked for grace, for special permission from Brother John 350 00:28:23,743 --> 00:28:26,121 to allow Cassidy to work on the short film still. 351 00:28:26,162 --> 00:28:30,166 And he's gonna a decision by hopefully July 4th. 352 00:28:33,128 --> 00:28:35,797 -Hello? -Yo, you're on speakerphone in a room of people, 353 00:28:35,839 --> 00:28:39,634 are OK with that? -Hey, what's up everybody, hello! 354 00:28:39,676 --> 00:28:40,593 Cassidy! 355 00:28:40,635 --> 00:28:42,512 Give us the spiel, who are you? 356 00:28:42,554 --> 00:28:45,640 I'm Cassidy Detmer, and I'm a recovering addict 357 00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:49,728 No I'm just joking, I feel like I'm in another meeting, an NA meeting. 358 00:28:49,769 --> 00:28:52,147 -Hi Cassidy -Hey Cassidy 359 00:28:52,188 --> 00:28:55,275 I haven't worked on any big budget productions or anything like that. 360 00:28:55,316 --> 00:28:58,361 But I did go to the Art Institute for three years. 361 00:28:58,403 --> 00:29:01,865 But before that, all through my using years, 362 00:29:01,906 --> 00:29:05,368 I would film stuff, just all kinds of random stuff all my life. 363 00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:08,830 So I'm always thinking about it, obsessing about it. 364 00:29:08,872 --> 00:29:10,874 I love film. 365 00:29:11,082 --> 00:29:14,294 Yeah, I mean, that's me in a nutshell. 366 00:29:14,419 --> 00:29:17,589 "Do you see clearly now this isn't Peter, this isn't your son. 367 00:29:17,630 --> 00:29:18,298 It's the drugs speaking. 368 00:29:18,339 --> 00:29:20,925 It'll always be the drugs. You have to cut him off." 369 00:29:20,967 --> 00:29:23,553 She pulls out a small index card. I say take that out. 370 00:29:23,595 --> 00:29:26,639 And if the mom would just go up to her son 371 00:29:26,681 --> 00:29:31,936 and just lay a hand on his cheek and look at him in the eye and say... 372 00:29:40,695 --> 00:29:42,906 They're about to play a video. 373 00:29:42,947 --> 00:29:45,575 Unfortunately, I can't see it. 374 00:29:52,916 --> 00:29:55,919 I got low battery. Shit. 375 00:29:55,960 --> 00:29:57,837 I think they forgot I was here. 376 00:29:58,671 --> 00:30:00,173 I'm gonna take my medicine. 377 00:30:00,298 --> 00:30:02,842 I can't understand what they're talking about anyways. 378 00:30:11,601 --> 00:30:12,977 I'm hungry. 379 00:30:13,311 --> 00:30:16,648 they're yakking away about I don't know what. 380 00:31:01,025 --> 00:31:03,611 The situation Cassidy's in right now, 381 00:31:03,653 --> 00:31:05,697 I'm very worried about where he's at. 382 00:31:05,822 --> 00:31:09,826 He's a really fragile guy and, you have a bad enough day, 383 00:31:09,868 --> 00:31:12,537 like right now, my head hurts so bad and I'm so stressed that 384 00:31:12,579 --> 00:31:16,040 if I had something in front of me, I'd do it. 385 00:31:16,165 --> 00:31:18,877 If I wasn't mandated, I would have left a long time ago, 386 00:31:18,918 --> 00:31:25,466 just because I know myself. I'm here because I have to be and I'm here because I need to be. 387 00:31:26,426 --> 00:31:30,138 Probably not the best way to spend your food stamps card, especially when 388 00:31:30,179 --> 00:31:32,432 you don't have a job or money. 389 00:31:32,473 --> 00:31:35,518 But I love energy drinks. 390 00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:42,567 And I did though, I did just get a phone call from Marco's pizza about a delivery job. 391 00:31:42,609 --> 00:31:44,402 So I'm super stoked about that. 392 00:31:44,444 --> 00:31:50,033 And I could possibly be delivering pizzas by Monday. 393 00:31:51,284 --> 00:31:54,412 Oh, man, that's good 394 00:31:54,537 --> 00:32:00,335 energy in a can, no crash later. Sike, there is a crash. 395 00:32:00,960 --> 00:32:04,964 And I believe I'm just now coming to accept the fact that I might be 396 00:32:05,006 --> 00:32:09,135 a little manic. And having a chemical imbalance contributes 397 00:32:09,260 --> 00:32:14,390 to me using drugs because I don't like the way I feel. 398 00:32:14,432 --> 00:32:17,852 I have thought of suicide before. 399 00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:20,146 It's like I just can't handle feeling this way anymore. 400 00:32:20,188 --> 00:32:23,024 So, you know, either I'm going to kill myself or I'm gonna get high. 401 00:32:23,066 --> 00:32:27,445 You know, sometimes it gets to that point where it's like there's just nothing else. 402 00:32:30,490 --> 00:32:32,575 Alright Cassidy. 403 00:32:32,784 --> 00:32:33,534 You can do this. 404 00:32:33,701 --> 00:32:38,331 Thank you, God, for a roof over my head, thank you for a car to drive. 405 00:32:38,456 --> 00:32:41,793 Thank you for my dad putting gas in my car. 406 00:32:43,711 --> 00:32:46,172 You got a lot of good things going on. 407 00:32:46,297 --> 00:32:50,385 Thank you for the jobs I'm... I'm going to get. 408 00:32:50,510 --> 00:32:52,720 You're gonna be alright. 409 00:33:03,815 --> 00:33:09,153 He told me that my driving under the influence thing would be a problem. 410 00:33:09,195 --> 00:33:14,784 Yeah, that's what I told him, I said it's been six years I mean it's like, that's a long time ago. 411 00:33:36,222 --> 00:33:37,974 I mean, how the hell am I gonna find a job? 412 00:33:38,016 --> 00:33:40,226 You know, how do felons find jobs? 413 00:33:40,351 --> 00:33:45,106 And how am I gonna be able to work on the short film if I can't even put gas in my car? 414 00:33:46,983 --> 00:33:50,987 If I get high, then all my worries will go away today, 415 00:33:51,029 --> 00:33:54,949 but then they'll just creep back up tomorrow when I'm not high. 416 00:33:54,991 --> 00:33:59,746 So I decided not to get high and decided to do this instead. 417 00:34:11,758 --> 00:34:15,636 I love me lens flares. Just like J.J. Abrams. 418 00:34:24,562 --> 00:34:26,773 Gosh, it sounds beautiful out here right now. 419 00:34:26,814 --> 00:34:28,691 It sounds like a symphony. 420 00:34:28,816 --> 00:34:30,610 Just listen. 421 00:34:36,449 --> 00:34:39,744 I'm afraid of failing at something that I love. 422 00:34:39,786 --> 00:34:48,086 To me making films was like this... Perfect thing. This most beautiful thing that was perfection. 423 00:34:48,669 --> 00:34:52,715 And if I touched it, it was going to fall apart. 424 00:34:52,757 --> 00:34:54,967 So I dared not touch it. 425 00:34:55,009 --> 00:34:58,471 But I've learned that it's... It's not perfect. 426 00:34:58,513 --> 00:35:01,516 You know, it's just like me. 427 00:35:01,682 --> 00:35:06,437 Its got its imperfections, but in the imperfections there's beauty. There's beauty in... 428 00:35:06,479 --> 00:35:08,189 Frailty, 429 00:35:08,356 --> 00:35:11,192 in just opening yourself up 430 00:35:11,234 --> 00:35:14,028 and not hiding. 431 00:35:18,074 --> 00:35:21,369 So I wanna get this all cut down pretty low all the way over to there. 432 00:35:21,410 --> 00:35:23,287 -OK. -Good luck to you. 433 00:35:23,329 --> 00:35:25,164 -Thank you. -Yeah. 434 00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,754 So he called me up and asked if there's any yard work, anything I could have him 435 00:35:31,796 --> 00:35:34,757 do to try to make a little bit of money or gas money. 436 00:35:34,882 --> 00:35:37,301 So I told him I could, he can come over and mow grass. 437 00:35:37,343 --> 00:35:41,055 Who wants to mow grass when it's 95 degrees, not me. 438 00:35:46,269 --> 00:35:48,521 You allergic to work? 439 00:35:48,563 --> 00:35:49,689 Yeah, I think so. 440 00:35:49,730 --> 00:35:51,816 I might die out here. 441 00:35:53,025 --> 00:35:54,944 Um no we just call him Cass. 442 00:35:54,986 --> 00:35:57,905 That sounds weird calling him uncle Cass. 443 00:35:57,947 --> 00:36:04,036 It would be fun if we saw Cassidy's movies on a big screen. 444 00:36:06,789 --> 00:36:12,587 20 to 25 was probably the really brutal years. 445 00:36:13,796 --> 00:36:17,049 My lowest time while using drugs was 446 00:36:17,091 --> 00:36:22,513 when I broke into my dad's bathroom and I was trying to steal his money and he 447 00:36:22,555 --> 00:36:26,350 woke up in the middle of the night and broke my hand. 448 00:36:26,809 --> 00:36:29,145 Every phone call I got from him was nothing 449 00:36:29,187 --> 00:36:32,440 but trouble and asking for things and things would disappear. 450 00:36:32,481 --> 00:36:34,275 It's actually a part of his life I try 451 00:36:34,317 --> 00:36:37,570 to forget about because that's not the true him. 452 00:36:37,612 --> 00:36:42,742 It was...you know the drugs and it was, it took him over. 453 00:36:51,334 --> 00:36:53,920 -Grandpa said good work. -Thank you. 454 00:36:53,961 --> 00:36:56,422 Thank you. I love ya. 455 00:37:14,941 --> 00:37:18,236 Going to the movie theater is like being in heaven. 456 00:37:18,486 --> 00:37:22,198 It's so comfortable for me. It's just, I get lost in it. 457 00:37:29,538 --> 00:37:32,792 I don't usually keep the number of days 458 00:37:32,833 --> 00:37:36,754 in my head, because if I do, it takes forever. 459 00:37:37,171 --> 00:37:41,342 Desperately ready to just move on with my life. 460 00:37:41,384 --> 00:37:43,469 Have a life again, have a normal life again. 461 00:37:43,511 --> 00:37:46,264 Have a car, have a job, have a place. 462 00:37:49,725 --> 00:37:52,687 Yeah, jail sucks. 463 00:37:52,728 --> 00:37:57,984 The biggest selling point this place has is that it's not a decade in prison. 464 00:38:01,195 --> 00:38:03,155 I loved my wife more than 465 00:38:03,197 --> 00:38:08,202 than anything or anyone, and I lost her because I kept using. 466 00:38:08,244 --> 00:38:09,287 I kept falling flat on my face. 467 00:38:09,287 --> 00:38:15,209 I kept repeating the vicious cycle, and she warned me and warned me and warned me 468 00:38:15,251 --> 00:38:19,005 that it was gonna end up with us getting divorced. 469 00:38:19,046 --> 00:38:22,133 I mean, there are bridges burned. 470 00:38:31,726 --> 00:38:32,685 ...ones that I love and from people I don't 471 00:38:32,685 --> 00:38:38,065 even know and I've hurt so many different people. -Right now I am finishing 472 00:38:38,107 --> 00:38:40,985 the graduation video just in time for the service. 473 00:38:41,027 --> 00:38:46,073 I had to cut my friend Brian out because he left. Caught with some drugs. 474 00:38:46,115 --> 00:38:48,117 So he's gone. 475 00:38:48,409 --> 00:38:52,163 Somebody that's that close to finishing 476 00:38:52,204 --> 00:38:52,872 the program and gets caught up 477 00:38:52,913 --> 00:38:55,666 in that kind of stuff is just, they're just not ready. 478 00:38:55,708 --> 00:38:56,250 It's nothing against them. 479 00:38:56,292 --> 00:38:59,128 You know, I've done it in other programs. 480 00:38:59,170 --> 00:39:01,005 I've been there. 481 00:39:01,047 --> 00:39:04,425 For the guy that gets it the first time around, great, good on you. 482 00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:06,385 That's my grandpa. He nailed it the first time. 483 00:39:06,427 --> 00:39:10,389 But it's taken me 13, 14 times. 484 00:39:12,308 --> 00:39:14,226 A Better Way ministry has done a lot, 485 00:39:14,268 --> 00:39:18,481 it's like a rebirth, you know, it's a better way, it's a perfect name. 486 00:39:18,522 --> 00:39:23,194 The day after I overdosed my dad, he was like 'you need to go somewhere.' 487 00:39:23,235 --> 00:39:25,196 So now this is just the beginning. 488 00:39:25,237 --> 00:39:27,448 And don't look behind you, look forward. 489 00:39:33,788 --> 00:39:36,999 That, men, that's what we are here for. 490 00:39:37,041 --> 00:39:42,797 That's why you're here and I'm looking to see every face at the finish line. 491 00:39:42,838 --> 00:39:46,592 Hallelujah, Father, we just thank you, Lord, tonight for what's been done. 492 00:39:46,634 --> 00:39:50,346 We thank you for the anointing that breaks every shackle and every addiction. 493 00:39:50,388 --> 00:39:51,305 Bless them tonight. 494 00:39:51,347 --> 00:39:55,935 Establish their steps, may they be the hands and the feet of Jesus Christ. 495 00:39:55,976 --> 00:39:57,937 -Amen. -Amen. 496 00:39:58,062 --> 00:40:03,109 So ladies and gentlemen I'd like to introduce to you, the graduates. 497 00:40:11,033 --> 00:40:13,994 The lights stayed on, it didn't look good on these monitors. 498 00:40:14,036 --> 00:40:15,746 The audio was terrible. 499 00:40:15,788 --> 00:40:17,331 I have a million things I hate about it. 500 00:40:17,373 --> 00:40:20,126 And I'm just, I'm not, it's not something I'm proud of. 501 00:40:20,167 --> 00:40:22,878 I'm just kinda disgusted by it honestly. 502 00:40:24,338 --> 00:40:26,966 If they don't let me and Cassidy make "On the Fence," 503 00:40:27,007 --> 00:40:31,095 I'm not gonna make it another five months here. 504 00:40:42,022 --> 00:40:45,359 We're getting our props together for the fence scene. 505 00:40:52,950 --> 00:40:53,951 I'm a drug addict and I lost custody 506 00:40:53,993 --> 00:40:59,165 of my daughter, and that's the main reason why I'm trying to get my life back 507 00:40:59,206 --> 00:41:03,794 together is so I can be a part of her life again. 508 00:41:04,044 --> 00:41:07,214 This is when I was in my band. 509 00:41:07,465 --> 00:41:11,719 That's me, heavy metal, that's my drummer and that was my guitar player. 510 00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:15,556 That's Jesus hanging on the cross of course. 511 00:41:15,681 --> 00:41:18,017 This is something I wrote. 512 00:41:20,936 --> 00:41:22,771 Let me start that over. 513 00:41:27,568 --> 00:41:29,695 This is the family vehicle that I flipped 514 00:41:29,820 --> 00:41:33,157 that ended up with me coming to A Better Way. 515 00:41:33,199 --> 00:41:38,329 I was high running from the cops, going about 115 miles an hour, when the truck flipped over. 516 00:41:38,370 --> 00:41:45,419 Holding on to all the pain that's left behind you. 517 00:41:45,461 --> 00:41:46,921 Stay above these lies. 518 00:41:46,962 --> 00:41:48,923 Stay true, walk in the courthouse. 519 00:41:48,964 --> 00:41:50,925 "Honey, I love you. Don't do this. 520 00:41:50,966 --> 00:41:54,512 We can make it, our marriage ain't broken until you break it. 521 00:41:54,553 --> 00:41:55,888 I shouldn't be here. 522 00:41:55,930 --> 00:41:57,264 That's a testimony. 523 00:41:57,306 --> 00:41:59,683 Rip up the papers, come home, honey." 524 00:42:00,851 --> 00:42:04,855 Will you ever live again? 525 00:42:05,856 --> 00:42:12,571 I'm going to make the best of doing what I'm doing, to make them proud again. 526 00:42:21,622 --> 00:42:23,374 This is my mom and my sister. 527 00:42:23,415 --> 00:42:28,087 I'm going to have a copy made of it and have it on the fence. 528 00:42:34,677 --> 00:42:38,305 You know, it's my mom, I... 529 00:42:38,347 --> 00:42:40,933 She was the kindest person I've ever met. 530 00:42:40,975 --> 00:42:46,772 And so, yeah, it was really... There's a lot of good memories with Mom 531 00:42:46,855 --> 00:42:48,774 I miss her a lot. It's the... 532 00:42:48,857 --> 00:42:52,987 One of the main reasons I got so bad into drugs, is when she died. 533 00:42:53,028 --> 00:42:56,574 So it's.. It's my deepest... 534 00:42:56,615 --> 00:42:59,076 It's my deepest wound, losing her. 535 00:42:59,368 --> 00:43:01,829 She died very suddenly, you know she died in the car wreck. 536 00:43:01,870 --> 00:43:06,750 So it was... I got a phone call one day and she was gone. 537 00:43:10,588 --> 00:43:13,716 I went on a mission trip with my church 538 00:43:13,757 --> 00:43:20,472 to Honduras to give food and clothing to a village, and 539 00:43:21,307 --> 00:43:24,310 we had a bad accident. 540 00:43:25,561 --> 00:43:26,437 So the first day there, 541 00:43:26,437 --> 00:43:33,193 I felt the overwhelming presence of God come over me and just happiness. 542 00:43:33,277 --> 00:43:35,487 So it was like one of the best days 543 00:43:35,529 --> 00:43:39,116 of my life, followed by one of the worst days of my life. 544 00:43:42,953 --> 00:43:47,333 We were driving through the rain forest and we were going down this big hill, 545 00:43:47,458 --> 00:43:54,548 gears start grinding and I guess the brakes went out and the driver had a choice. 546 00:43:54,590 --> 00:43:59,136 It was like a two hundred foot drop off a cliff and we would all possibly die 547 00:43:59,261 --> 00:44:03,682 or he could bank it into the trees to try to slow us down. 548 00:44:12,691 --> 00:44:18,197 And when he flipped it, I landed about here and bent straight back. 549 00:44:18,238 --> 00:44:20,532 The two people I was sitting in between. 550 00:44:20,658 --> 00:44:22,951 Well, they snapped in half and they both died. 551 00:44:22,993 --> 00:44:28,248 And then they cushioned my fall and basically saved me from dying. 552 00:44:28,290 --> 00:44:31,210 I had collarbones broken and I was a mess, 553 00:44:31,251 --> 00:44:34,797 but when your adrenaline's kicking, and I was looking for my brother. 554 00:44:34,838 --> 00:44:39,927 He was covered in blood and I thought he was dead. 555 00:44:40,594 --> 00:44:44,807 It took them like eight hours to find us because we were in the middle of nowhere. 556 00:44:44,848 --> 00:44:50,396 The villagers actually made smoke signals to flag down the helicopters. 557 00:44:50,604 --> 00:44:52,648 And Cass had... 558 00:44:52,690 --> 00:44:55,609 He had a broken leg, a broken arm, a broken clavicle, 559 00:44:55,651 --> 00:44:59,488 and then they started having problems with drugs and pain pills and everything, 560 00:44:59,530 --> 00:45:03,992 and it got to a point to where Cass was actually out of control. 561 00:45:09,373 --> 00:45:12,626 So I went back into drugs and alcohol after that. 562 00:45:12,668 --> 00:45:16,130 Of course, they gave me painkillers for being injured and what not. 563 00:45:16,338 --> 00:45:20,134 That made a already bad problem much worse. 564 00:45:20,259 --> 00:45:25,097 Basically, it was like pouring gasoline onto a campfire, 565 00:45:25,222 --> 00:45:29,309 which started a forest fire of drug addiction. 566 00:45:33,772 --> 00:45:37,985 Why would God let a lady next to me get cut in half? 567 00:45:38,235 --> 00:45:42,030 We're there doing God's work. 568 00:45:43,907 --> 00:45:46,994 I mean, I don't know what the hell all that means. 569 00:45:59,465 --> 00:46:08,432 ...twilight's last gleaming, whose broad stripes and bright stars, 570 00:46:08,474 --> 00:46:13,061 through the perilous fight. 571 00:46:14,730 --> 00:46:15,773 I've been nervous all day, 572 00:46:15,814 --> 00:46:20,486 waiting for Jared to call me and let me know how his meeting went with Brother John, 573 00:46:20,527 --> 00:46:23,530 whether or not I'm going to be a part of the project. 574 00:46:56,522 --> 00:46:58,065 Alright. 575 00:46:59,066 --> 00:47:01,401 Hello, Mr. Jared. 576 00:47:02,361 --> 00:47:06,114 I'm doing good, I'm good. 577 00:47:10,619 --> 00:47:16,667 Sweet, cool, so he's, so he's cool, I can work with, I can work with Josh. 578 00:47:18,669 --> 00:47:20,128 Oh, praise God. 579 00:47:20,170 --> 00:47:22,381 That's great news. 580 00:47:45,070 --> 00:47:47,197 I'm down as the director of photography. 581 00:47:47,239 --> 00:47:50,117 They're in charge of the entire look of the project. 582 00:47:50,158 --> 00:47:52,494 Working Director. 583 00:47:52,661 --> 00:47:55,539 I would check these books but I have to ream them here 584 00:47:55,581 --> 00:48:00,752 because I owe the library three dollars. I'm not coming off of it. 585 00:48:01,587 --> 00:48:07,551 My biggest concern is that we get good talent and that nobody has a meltdown 586 00:48:07,593 --> 00:48:12,347 and collapses and ends up torpedoing this whole project. 587 00:48:15,934 --> 00:48:19,646 To be love for us today means that we need to be patient and kind. 588 00:48:19,688 --> 00:48:22,566 We are going to fight for justice. We're not going to give up. 589 00:48:22,608 --> 00:48:25,193 We're always going to be hopeful through every circumstance. 590 00:48:25,235 --> 00:48:29,114 Alright, so in the name of Jesus, God guide us to the right people. 591 00:48:29,156 --> 00:48:30,991 A prayer and a meeting. 592 00:48:36,830 --> 00:48:42,127 -I am auditioning for the mother role. -Seth Dowd, I'm auditioning for Pete. 593 00:48:42,169 --> 00:48:43,337 I'm feeling a little nervous, 594 00:48:43,378 --> 00:48:48,133 this is my first time doing anything so this is pretty nerve-wracking but I'm really excited. 595 00:48:48,258 --> 00:48:51,011 So I'm gonna go in there and knock them dead. 596 00:48:51,053 --> 00:48:52,846 I'm just hoping for the best. 597 00:48:52,888 --> 00:48:55,807 I'm more hungry, than nervous. 598 00:48:56,183 --> 00:49:02,147 I'm auditioning for Judy today because I want to make a difference to people 599 00:49:02,189 --> 00:49:08,445 who have addictions because it strikes closely to home. 600 00:49:11,031 --> 00:49:12,950 -How are you doing? -Fine how are you guys? 601 00:49:12,991 --> 00:49:14,826 Doing great. 602 00:49:14,868 --> 00:49:17,621 -So my name's Cassidy, I'm co-directing. -Nice to meet you. 603 00:49:17,663 --> 00:49:19,373 -What's your name? -Alexa Rochelle. 604 00:49:19,414 --> 00:49:21,667 Alexa. Lovely to meet you, Alexa. 605 00:49:21,708 --> 00:49:27,255 And my co-director Jared's over here, and Josh will be reading with you. 606 00:49:27,381 --> 00:49:29,591 -And you're reading for Judy? -Yes 607 00:49:30,592 --> 00:49:32,386 My brother graduated from there. 608 00:49:32,427 --> 00:49:34,721 Best thing that ever happened to our family. 609 00:49:34,763 --> 00:49:38,475 What are you running from? Same thing as everybody else? 610 00:49:38,517 --> 00:49:41,103 -What are you running from? -What are you running away from? 611 00:49:41,144 --> 00:49:42,604 What are you running from? 612 00:49:42,646 --> 00:49:45,190 Same thing as everyone else? 613 00:49:45,399 --> 00:49:47,484 -Alright. -So we'll get back with you 614 00:49:47,526 --> 00:49:49,987 early next week and let you know, but you did a good job. 615 00:49:50,028 --> 00:49:50,487 -Thank you. -Awesome. 616 00:49:50,529 --> 00:49:53,490 Thank you so much. Excellent job. 617 00:49:55,575 --> 00:49:57,244 We normally don't allow students 618 00:49:57,285 --> 00:50:01,748 that don't graduate to be involved in this type of stuff, but 619 00:50:01,790 --> 00:50:03,834 I love Cassidy and I love his heart. 620 00:50:04,042 --> 00:50:05,043 When he relapsed, you know, 621 00:50:05,085 --> 00:50:09,506 I got the call and it was like, oh my gosh, Cassidy. Really just broke my heart. 622 00:50:09,548 --> 00:50:13,552 But this maybe will be something that's 623 00:50:13,593 --> 00:50:17,848 more important to him than the drugs and pills. 624 00:50:17,889 --> 00:50:18,765 So far it's going really good, 625 00:50:18,765 --> 00:50:22,978 the last guy really killed it, Seth, he did a great job playing Pete. 626 00:50:23,061 --> 00:50:28,108 I'm actually surprised we're getting some pretty good, pretty good performances. 627 00:50:28,150 --> 00:50:30,861 Take it back at "You don't speak." Let me yell at you. 628 00:50:31,194 --> 00:50:35,240 "You don't speak for her. If my mother has something to say to me, she can say it herself-- 629 00:50:35,282 --> 00:50:37,617 --you don't get to call the shots anymore. 630 00:50:37,743 --> 00:50:39,494 She's put up with enough of your shit. 631 00:50:39,536 --> 00:50:40,328 We've seen it for years. 632 00:50:40,370 --> 00:50:44,458 -Your last binge almost killed her. -Who are you to judge me? 633 00:50:44,583 --> 00:50:46,251 I can get clean at home. Just give me a ride-- 634 00:50:46,293 --> 00:50:49,629 You're not getting it, ok you're out of control. 635 00:50:49,671 --> 00:50:51,590 You do not have a home with us anymore. 636 00:50:51,631 --> 00:50:53,050 You don't have a room at your mother's house. 637 00:50:53,091 --> 00:50:54,676 You don't have a place to come for Christmas. 638 00:50:54,718 --> 00:50:56,261 We will not celebrate you, give you 639 00:50:56,303 --> 00:50:59,014 presents, buy you groceries, bail you out, loan you money, 640 00:50:59,097 --> 00:51:02,851 pretend we don't notice you using, stealing, nothing. 641 00:51:02,893 --> 00:51:04,186 You've got nowhere else to go. 642 00:51:04,227 --> 00:51:06,146 It's this or serve some real jail time. 643 00:51:06,188 --> 00:51:10,025 Either way, it won't be with us. 644 00:51:10,233 --> 00:51:11,735 OK scene. 645 00:51:11,902 --> 00:51:13,862 I'm good with that. 646 00:51:15,947 --> 00:51:16,865 I'd much rather cast someone that we're like 647 00:51:16,907 --> 00:51:22,913 toning down, than building up. -If they can hit that in that short time. 648 00:51:22,954 --> 00:51:25,791 Like how he did, you know, when he read it, and his inflection changed, 649 00:51:25,832 --> 00:51:27,918 and it was there. -I love Seth. 650 00:51:27,959 --> 00:51:30,337 -Which means that Seth and London are the top two. -He looked the part too. 651 00:51:30,462 --> 00:51:32,297 -Did he bring it too? -He was awesome. 652 00:51:32,422 --> 00:51:35,342 He looked it, he delivered. 653 00:51:58,824 --> 00:52:00,283 That's Josh Litton. 654 00:52:01,493 --> 00:52:02,661 Hello? 655 00:52:02,702 --> 00:52:04,246 Hey, uh... 656 00:52:04,538 --> 00:52:06,790 Remember, Canyon? 657 00:52:07,916 --> 00:52:10,544 -Canyon, yeah. -Yeah, he overdosed 658 00:52:10,585 --> 00:52:15,132 Shut up. Like overdosed as in like, is he dead? 659 00:52:15,173 --> 00:52:18,051 No he made it, but he was dead, I guess, 660 00:52:18,093 --> 00:52:20,971 when the paramedics got to him, they had to give him Narcan. 661 00:52:21,012 --> 00:52:21,763 Damn. 662 00:52:21,763 --> 00:52:25,684 Said he was shooting Dilaudid, and eating fentanyl patches. 663 00:52:26,017 --> 00:52:28,687 I've done that. I've eaten fentanyl patches before. 664 00:52:28,728 --> 00:52:30,814 -Yeah me too. -Yep. 665 00:52:30,856 --> 00:52:33,733 -Oh, my God, well I'm glad he's alive. 666 00:52:34,359 --> 00:52:38,613 -Alright well thank you for letting me know, dude. -Yeah man, I'll talk to you tomorrow. 667 00:52:46,538 --> 00:52:50,834 Canyon, the guy who worked with me and Josh on making commercials. 668 00:53:05,182 --> 00:53:09,686 That could very easily be me, could very easily be Josh. 669 00:53:24,701 --> 00:53:29,915 If I could talk to myself before a relapse, I would say this, too, shall pass. 670 00:53:29,956 --> 00:53:32,083 Tomorrow will come 671 00:53:32,209 --> 00:53:35,503 and the next day will come, and next day will come. 672 00:54:23,969 --> 00:54:28,390 Ahhh, we're going to Pinewood Studios to see.. 673 00:54:28,431 --> 00:54:31,726 I got a job interview with the cleaning company 674 00:54:31,851 --> 00:54:34,020 at 4:20. 675 00:54:34,187 --> 00:54:36,898 4-20, the magical number. 676 00:54:36,940 --> 00:54:38,066 No, but... 677 00:54:38,108 --> 00:54:44,447 This is where they film really, you know, Marvel movies, hundred million dollar movies, and... 678 00:54:44,739 --> 00:54:47,826 hopefully one day I'll be working here on set. 679 00:54:47,867 --> 00:54:51,496 But first we'll start with cleaning the set. 680 00:54:51,621 --> 00:54:53,206 So... 681 00:54:53,957 --> 00:54:55,292 I'm nervous, but I'm OK. 682 00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:57,585 I'm not going to panic. 683 00:55:04,134 --> 00:55:05,802 Well, 684 00:55:05,844 --> 00:55:07,721 that was interesting. 685 00:55:07,762 --> 00:55:12,392 The job is straight up cleaning toilets, 686 00:55:12,434 --> 00:55:15,061 and urinals. She'll know Friday, she'll let me know Friday 687 00:55:15,103 --> 00:55:18,523 and hopefully I'll be starting next Monday after the shoot. 688 00:55:22,152 --> 00:55:24,154 Cassadilla. 689 00:55:26,281 --> 00:55:28,074 -Hello, sir. -Hello 690 00:55:29,784 --> 00:55:32,120 When I say Canyon's in a vulnerable spot, 691 00:55:32,162 --> 00:55:37,709 I mean, he is... About as high-risk as you can get right now. 692 00:55:40,920 --> 00:55:42,756 -What's up buddy? 693 00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:46,509 -It's good to see you, I missed you. -I missed you too. 694 00:55:46,551 --> 00:55:49,012 -I'm glad you're...you OK? -Yeah. 695 00:55:49,054 --> 00:55:51,890 -Yeah? -You look good. You look good. 696 00:55:51,931 --> 00:55:54,476 -How ya doing, Canyon? -Hey what's up brother. 697 00:55:55,977 --> 00:55:59,022 What? That is such a weird-looking animal. 698 00:55:59,356 --> 00:56:02,984 -It's like touching a nut sack. -And that rat tail... 699 00:56:03,026 --> 00:56:05,653 -Oh, my God. -This is my kitty. 700 00:56:06,029 --> 00:56:08,656 -It's like ice running through your veins. -Yeah, yeah. 701 00:56:08,698 --> 00:56:09,449 I kept nodding out on the doctor, 702 00:56:09,449 --> 00:56:12,702 he's like, "we're gonna give you something to reverse this." 703 00:56:12,744 --> 00:56:16,206 -I'm like, "Alright man." -Don't do that! 704 00:56:16,581 --> 00:56:20,210 Here you get this huge thing of just Narcan... 705 00:56:20,251 --> 00:56:22,504 -I'm like... -Where'd they stick it at? 706 00:56:22,712 --> 00:56:24,964 -Right in my IV. -Oh, OK. 707 00:56:25,006 --> 00:56:28,301 So it's directly in my blood stream and I mean it just shoots you... 708 00:56:28,343 --> 00:56:31,012 You got new tracks and stuff? Oh, yeah. 709 00:56:31,054 --> 00:56:35,225 I mean it sucks dude, I had... You're... 710 00:56:37,560 --> 00:56:39,938 You're stuck in it. 711 00:56:40,105 --> 00:56:43,274 I don't know, I regret ever leaving A Better Way. 712 00:56:43,441 --> 00:56:43,983 I really do. 713 00:56:44,150 --> 00:56:49,531 At the time I thought God was telling me to leave. 714 00:56:49,572 --> 00:56:50,490 What's the plan like? 715 00:56:50,532 --> 00:56:52,367 What are you going to do? 716 00:56:52,409 --> 00:56:53,868 For real, for real no bullshit. 717 00:56:53,910 --> 00:56:57,122 For real for real, no bullshit um... 718 00:56:57,580 --> 00:57:01,668 I know I can't go back into the industry anymore 719 00:57:01,709 --> 00:57:05,004 because there's way too many influences. 720 00:57:05,296 --> 00:57:09,592 I mean, the whole time I shooting Drop Dead Diva, I was also shooting ice. 721 00:57:09,634 --> 00:57:10,677 -Yeah. -You know? 722 00:57:10,718 --> 00:57:12,512 -Whatever drug you want... -Ready. 723 00:57:12,554 --> 00:57:15,390 Right like, guy in props has a pocket full of OxyContin. 724 00:57:15,432 --> 00:57:19,436 Like just go talk to him, he'll probably give you some for free. 725 00:57:19,477 --> 00:57:23,356 If you could work in an environment where there wasn't drugs and it was in film? 726 00:57:23,398 --> 00:57:24,065 -I would love it. -Yeah? 727 00:57:24,107 --> 00:57:28,820 I would love it, I'd take it hands down, you know. 728 00:57:34,701 --> 00:57:40,373 I'm most nervous that this week... That they're just not going to put it together. 729 00:57:40,623 --> 00:57:42,959 I care most about them being healthy 730 00:57:43,001 --> 00:57:45,712 and what does it matter if you tell a good story or make a short film, 731 00:57:45,753 --> 00:57:49,257 if someone relapses like that's not, it's not worth it. 732 00:57:49,382 --> 00:57:52,802 Right now, I'm the most stressed I've been this whole time. 733 00:57:52,844 --> 00:57:54,929 I'm so goddamn sick of this shit feeling like 734 00:57:54,971 --> 00:57:59,767 I'm supposed to know all the answers, like I'm so, I'm about to snap. 735 00:57:59,809 --> 00:58:00,477 That's the thing that's driving me nuts, 736 00:58:00,477 --> 00:58:02,979 is that you and I aren't on the same page with this. 737 00:58:03,062 --> 00:58:04,647 Is it my fault? Do I need to fix... 738 00:58:04,689 --> 00:58:06,816 No, listen, I'm flipping. I don't know why. 739 00:58:06,858 --> 00:58:08,651 I don't know why. I... It's like, 740 00:58:08,693 --> 00:58:10,445 I could cry. 741 00:58:10,945 --> 00:58:14,991 Here you go, picture them brother and sister, Seth. And Quinn. 742 00:58:15,033 --> 00:58:17,869 Alexa, hey, this is Cassidy from "On the Fence." 743 00:58:17,911 --> 00:58:20,121 We liked you the most out of everybody, 744 00:58:20,163 --> 00:58:25,460 so we wanted to give you the gig and was hoping you'd say yes. 745 00:58:26,961 --> 00:58:29,506 Yay! Look forward to working with you. 746 00:58:29,547 --> 00:58:31,674 -We got a Judy. -We got a Judy. 747 00:58:34,886 --> 00:58:38,264 -Hey what's going on Drew? -You guys still wanna make a movie? 748 00:58:38,431 --> 00:58:40,600 I think so. 749 00:58:42,393 --> 00:58:46,147 If we were to step on set right now, it would be a train wreck. 750 00:58:46,356 --> 00:58:49,025 I think I might have a location for the fence. 751 00:58:49,067 --> 00:58:51,528 -That could be our road. -The road kill road? 752 00:58:51,569 --> 00:58:53,154 Yeah. 753 00:59:00,119 --> 00:59:01,996 This is the opening shot of the movie. 754 00:59:02,038 --> 00:59:07,001 -So I'm thinking, start moving then you start moving. -OK. 755 00:59:09,837 --> 00:59:12,257 Look back. Cut. 756 00:59:12,590 --> 00:59:18,346 Have the camera come and tilt like this, you know, and Pete is gonna have to run this way. 757 00:59:22,517 --> 00:59:25,728 Then it's jam it to the fence, with me, dirty shoulder. 758 00:59:25,770 --> 00:59:30,567 Do you have that? OK, and now stay there and now you get one more like that. 759 00:59:30,608 --> 00:59:33,736 Man this could be a great ending, just ending with the trees and then 760 00:59:33,778 --> 00:59:36,197 putting the title up there, just kind of like he's looking up to heaven, 761 00:59:36,239 --> 00:59:39,576 saying, "Hey, God, I'm going to commit this time." 762 00:59:39,701 --> 00:59:43,162 And then we can get a beautiful shot of the sun going through the trees. 763 00:59:43,204 --> 00:59:46,291 The cool dance between light and darkness. 764 00:59:46,332 --> 00:59:47,750 Love it. 765 00:59:48,376 --> 00:59:54,716 Our main character, Pete, has a long road ahead of him in trying to stay sober. 766 01:00:04,350 --> 01:00:06,686 There's a scene where we have all these photos. 767 01:00:06,728 --> 01:00:10,523 So we're supposed to have all these photos on the fence and we don't have enough of those. 768 01:00:10,815 --> 01:00:11,649 You know, some guys come in the program and 769 01:00:11,649 --> 01:00:15,903 they have tats all over and they wear their wounds on the outside. 770 01:00:15,945 --> 01:00:18,531 And you can see they've had a rough life. 771 01:00:18,656 --> 01:00:22,452 But some guys that come in the program, they're clean on the outside. 772 01:00:22,577 --> 01:00:26,372 They look like church kids, but their wounds are on the inside. 773 01:00:26,414 --> 01:00:30,793 And those sometimes are the guys who are the most messed up. 774 01:00:31,294 --> 01:00:33,713 In recovery, it's sort of refreshing 775 01:00:33,755 --> 01:00:36,090 in a way, because everybody's messed up already. 776 01:00:36,215 --> 01:00:38,551 It's like an openness, it's like "yeah, I got this addiction, 777 01:00:38,593 --> 01:00:42,680 I got this problem." And people are more accepting of that. 778 01:00:43,681 --> 01:00:49,395 I feel like there's a community here of people that are as messed up as me or more 779 01:00:49,437 --> 01:00:53,274 and if I'm having a messed up day or some of my stuff comes out or whatever, 780 01:00:53,316 --> 01:00:54,984 they don't care. 781 01:00:55,026 --> 01:00:58,029 They'll look at you like, "that's all you got today? Please. 782 01:00:58,071 --> 01:01:00,657 I mean, I've seen worse than that, I've been through worse than that." 783 01:01:00,782 --> 01:01:04,369 So that makes me feel like I belong. 784 01:01:07,455 --> 01:01:10,291 Pull yourself together, Cassidy. 785 01:01:10,333 --> 01:01:13,127 You're OK. 786 01:01:13,336 --> 01:01:15,088 You're a child of God. 787 01:01:17,006 --> 01:01:19,050 Stop crying. 788 01:01:19,217 --> 01:01:20,927 You're a child of God. 789 01:01:21,177 --> 01:01:23,388 You're a child of God. You're a child of God. 790 01:01:23,429 --> 01:01:25,640 You're a child of God. You can do this. 791 01:01:25,682 --> 01:01:28,226 You can do this, you can do this. 792 01:01:29,560 --> 01:01:31,521 You can do this. 793 01:01:33,606 --> 01:01:37,610 Hello, welcome, guys. Cassidy, nice to meet you again. 794 01:01:37,735 --> 01:01:38,861 Come on in, guys. 795 01:01:38,903 --> 01:01:41,614 Yeah I'm doing great. 796 01:01:41,656 --> 01:01:43,616 Becky, Mom. Hi Quinn. 797 01:01:43,658 --> 01:01:44,867 -Welcome. -Alexa. 798 01:01:44,909 --> 01:01:46,536 Seth, you're older brother. 799 01:01:46,744 --> 01:01:49,205 And I know I've read and heard a lot of times that 800 01:01:49,247 --> 01:01:52,625 90 percent of good directing is having good actors, right? 801 01:01:52,667 --> 01:01:56,421 So at least we got 90 percent, and I'll just take care of the other 10 percent. 802 01:01:56,462 --> 01:01:59,257 I myself am an addict in recovery. 803 01:01:59,298 --> 01:02:03,845 I have...social, like, really bad social anxiety and fear, 804 01:02:03,886 --> 01:02:06,848 of big groups of people, which is nice because this is nice and intimate right now 805 01:02:06,889 --> 01:02:08,725 so I love it. 806 01:02:08,891 --> 01:02:09,767 And so I would get high. 807 01:02:09,809 --> 01:02:14,272 That's how it first started off was to get high just to try to cope. 808 01:02:14,313 --> 01:02:17,442 And then I have a little sister and I just... 809 01:02:17,525 --> 01:02:22,697 It would be devastating for her to tell me, you know, you can't come home. 810 01:02:23,114 --> 01:02:27,034 When she talks about how her brother went to the ministry and everything like that, 811 01:02:27,201 --> 01:02:30,037 and then she asks you, "what you running from?" 812 01:02:30,079 --> 01:02:32,165 -Maybe you take a swing of your beer. -Mmhmm 813 01:02:32,206 --> 01:02:34,667 Cause you're trying to avoid the answer to that question. 814 01:02:34,709 --> 01:02:37,837 OK. Action. 815 01:02:38,171 --> 01:02:40,506 We will not celebrate you, 816 01:02:40,673 --> 01:02:44,427 give you presents, buy your groceries, bail you out-- 817 01:02:44,469 --> 01:02:46,888 --this isn't how a family is supposed to treat each other. 818 01:02:46,929 --> 01:02:49,891 Door opens, Mom gets out. 819 01:02:50,725 --> 01:02:52,727 From now on, 820 01:02:52,769 --> 01:02:57,023 my actions will match my love for you. 821 01:03:00,985 --> 01:03:04,238 We'll be there if you graduate. 822 01:03:07,950 --> 01:03:09,827 I died once. 823 01:03:09,869 --> 01:03:17,627 I was technically dead for like eight minutes of an overdose. 824 01:03:17,668 --> 01:03:20,046 Well I got shot and I was dead for like 10. 825 01:03:20,087 --> 01:03:20,963 You beat me by two minutes. 826 01:03:21,005 --> 01:03:26,052 You've had a glimpse into the afterlife two minutes longer than me. 827 01:03:26,803 --> 01:03:30,765 We're going to get this side fixed up, see if we can get your smile back and, 828 01:03:30,807 --> 01:03:33,810 get you ready and looking nice for graduation, right? 829 01:03:33,935 --> 01:03:36,395 -Yes sir. -Awesome. 830 01:03:53,913 --> 01:03:57,667 Well, so there you go, rejected from cleaning, 831 01:03:57,708 --> 01:04:03,130 I cannot even get a job at Pinewood Studios cleaning it, 832 01:04:03,256 --> 01:04:06,926 cleaning the toilets. It kind of makes you feel like you're less than I mean... 833 01:04:06,968 --> 01:04:09,846 you know, shit. 834 01:04:09,971 --> 01:04:12,807 Fuck. I need something to go right. 835 01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:17,895 Seemed like everything was gonna go right, and then enough, starts falling apart again. 836 01:04:23,734 --> 01:04:27,238 I really kinda just wanna have a drink right now. 837 01:04:27,280 --> 01:04:30,616 I just wanna chug right now, just... 838 01:04:30,658 --> 01:04:34,328 Get hammered and forget about all this crap. 839 01:04:54,348 --> 01:04:57,894 Hmm, yeah, I mean... 840 01:04:58,227 --> 01:05:02,398 Um, I found out my ex-wife got remarried. 841 01:05:02,440 --> 01:05:04,650 And... 842 01:05:04,817 --> 01:05:07,194 There's a part of me that didn't wanna believe it would happen. 843 01:05:07,236 --> 01:05:13,159 Um, she was still using my last name for the longest time, 844 01:05:13,200 --> 01:05:14,827 and um... 845 01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:18,873 Then all of a sudden it just changed. 846 01:05:18,915 --> 01:05:21,542 And there's wedding pictures. It's done. 847 01:05:21,584 --> 01:05:23,461 It's been done. But now it's really done. 848 01:05:23,502 --> 01:05:27,715 Now it's, now it's done with no chance of coming back. 849 01:05:28,507 --> 01:05:29,383 I lose sleep over it, 850 01:05:29,383 --> 01:05:33,679 I dream about her every night, and it's always some kinda dream about 851 01:05:33,721 --> 01:05:38,059 me not being able to get to her like something bad happening and I can't get to her, 852 01:05:38,100 --> 01:05:39,977 it's torture. 853 01:05:47,944 --> 01:05:51,322 -So you're running, which way guys? -Right to the left. 854 01:05:51,364 --> 01:05:52,823 No, no, no. Yeah, which-- 855 01:05:52,865 --> 01:05:53,866 alright. 856 01:05:54,075 --> 01:05:54,867 -Where does he go? 857 01:05:54,909 --> 01:05:57,954 He's sitting on the toilet pulling drugs out of his backpack. 858 01:05:57,995 --> 01:06:00,873 OK, so we're gonna shoot it this way. It's totally cool. 859 01:06:00,915 --> 01:06:05,503 So you want him down, right? So clear the frame, please. 860 01:06:05,544 --> 01:06:07,046 Cassidy please clear frame. 861 01:06:07,088 --> 01:06:08,547 Thanks. 862 01:06:08,589 --> 01:06:10,549 Alright, now up. 863 01:06:10,591 --> 01:06:15,221 So regardless if it's here, he is down using and then he sits up into frame 864 01:06:15,262 --> 01:06:18,933 and he's unrolling a bill. -And it would be cool if we could add a nice wide shot here 865 01:06:18,975 --> 01:06:22,395 of him looking through the aisle. -Let me see the list, I don't... 866 01:06:23,604 --> 01:06:26,148 This isn't the time that we... 867 01:06:26,190 --> 01:06:27,024 Jared, help me, help me. 868 01:06:27,024 --> 01:06:30,778 I'm trying to make better sense of, like, explain what this is. 869 01:06:30,820 --> 01:06:33,072 This isn't let's figure out our shots. 870 01:06:33,114 --> 01:06:34,907 This is let's get on pictures of what 871 01:06:34,949 --> 01:06:37,159 we've already planned for the last two weeks. 872 01:06:37,201 --> 01:06:39,370 -Yeah. -Yeah, OK. 873 01:06:39,495 --> 01:06:41,539 Because you're talking, and I'm, I love you. 874 01:06:41,580 --> 01:06:43,749 I'm just, it's work time, and I'm not trying to be a dick. 875 01:06:43,791 --> 01:06:45,584 But you're talking about adding things, 876 01:06:45,626 --> 01:06:49,088 changing things that are huge on my end that we've put a lot into. 877 01:06:49,130 --> 01:06:51,173 And because of the issues that we've had 878 01:06:51,215 --> 01:06:54,468 with you can't be there, which is not your fault. 879 01:06:54,510 --> 01:06:55,344 -I feel like I'm being a dick, I'm not trying-- -No, I'm hearing you, 880 01:06:55,344 --> 01:06:58,931 You put a lot of work into this, this is a lot. -It's not just me 881 01:06:58,973 --> 01:07:01,267 it's the other people that are gonna make this happen. 882 01:07:01,308 --> 01:07:03,936 This was the result of a six hour meeting, that... 883 01:07:03,978 --> 01:07:05,896 you missed. -So 884 01:07:06,022 --> 01:07:09,817 -So I'm learning it also as we go because I didn't know all these shots. 885 01:07:09,859 --> 01:07:13,738 -Yeah. -Well we need him to have space to say this is how I pictured it. 886 01:07:13,779 --> 01:07:15,531 -Sure. Because we can change this. 887 01:07:15,573 --> 01:07:17,950 But on the day we can't change this. 888 01:07:17,992 --> 01:07:21,704 On the day we're shooting this, and praying to God we get our coverage. 889 01:07:21,746 --> 01:07:23,831 -OK. -OK. 890 01:07:24,331 --> 01:07:26,917 Alright. So what we got first, he's in the isle. 891 01:07:27,209 --> 01:07:31,005 So face that way like you're in the aisle, please. 892 01:07:31,047 --> 01:07:35,092 -OK. -Then over the shoulder of Pete as the car pulls in, wide shot. 893 01:07:35,134 --> 01:07:37,470 Yep. 894 01:07:37,511 --> 01:07:39,513 I took my last pill an hour ago 895 01:07:39,555 --> 01:07:41,932 for my lunchtime dose, so I'm all out of meds, 896 01:07:41,974 --> 01:07:45,186 so I've got to go today and get that filled so I can have it tomorrow morning. 897 01:07:45,227 --> 01:07:47,980 -Cool, alright. Love you buddy. -Love you too, you're doing a great job. 898 01:07:48,022 --> 01:07:50,733 -Yeah, you are too, thank you. And I'm sorry I'm not trying... 899 01:07:50,775 --> 01:07:53,110 -You're fine, you're fine. 900 01:07:59,825 --> 01:08:01,202 Well. 901 01:08:03,329 --> 01:08:10,252 I want it to go so well, so bad, like I want this to be really great and... 902 01:08:11,170 --> 01:08:12,838 I don't know. 903 01:08:13,005 --> 01:08:15,591 I guess like these days, I'm a little... 904 01:08:15,633 --> 01:08:19,929 I'm a little more like mad at Cassidy than I thought I was. 905 01:08:19,970 --> 01:08:20,846 I think, I don't know, 906 01:08:20,846 --> 01:08:25,726 There's a part of me that thinks like, "why didn't you stick around?" 907 01:08:25,893 --> 01:08:31,524 I don't know, feels a little... I feel a little abandoned. 908 01:09:08,310 --> 01:09:11,438 I really experienced God when I'm outside in nature. 909 01:09:11,564 --> 01:09:16,152 Takes my mind off of all my obsessive thinking, negative thinking, 910 01:09:16,193 --> 01:09:18,904 Oh, Cassidy, you're just - you're not worth it, Cassidy, 911 01:09:18,946 --> 01:09:23,033 you're going to fall a part again, Cassidy, you're going to relapse again. 912 01:09:31,125 --> 01:09:34,211 I'm gonna call that scene four, part two. 913 01:09:34,253 --> 01:09:38,215 This is where Pete is walking back to the rehab 914 01:09:38,340 --> 01:09:39,175 sees some roadkill. 915 01:09:39,216 --> 01:09:44,138 As Pete's walking by the disfiguredness of this, this carcass here, 916 01:09:44,180 --> 01:09:48,601 he's looking at, he's looking at his dead self, the old Pete. 917 01:09:48,642 --> 01:09:49,518 And then, and then when he gets back 918 01:09:49,518 --> 01:09:55,524 on the campus, he looks up to the sky as he's walking, walking back. 919 01:09:55,900 --> 01:09:59,695 He's acknowledging the new Pete. And um... 920 01:10:00,070 --> 01:10:05,075 That he's, that he's gonna do things differently now. 921 01:10:20,466 --> 01:10:21,425 I'm a little stressed about putting a dead 922 01:10:21,425 --> 01:10:27,097 animal in my trunk because it's so freaking hot, gonna be nasty, guts everywhere. 923 01:10:27,223 --> 01:10:30,184 I'm just wondering what people are gonna think when they're driving by. 924 01:10:30,226 --> 01:10:32,269 What kind of weird rituals 925 01:10:32,311 --> 01:10:36,482 am I doing at home with dead animals? 926 01:10:36,649 --> 01:10:39,944 It's not, it's not wintertime. It's not like I'm picking it up to eat it. 927 01:10:46,492 --> 01:10:49,370 Oh, my God, it looks disgusting. 928 01:10:49,411 --> 01:10:51,163 Come on, man. 929 01:10:52,706 --> 01:10:54,875 Smells like death. 930 01:12:35,351 --> 01:12:38,979 Cool. Super exciting. 931 01:12:40,606 --> 01:12:43,150 Oh, boy. Alrighty. 932 01:12:43,192 --> 01:12:46,111 -Hello, hello, hello. -How are you doing? 933 01:12:46,236 --> 01:12:48,322 -Shaking. -Don't be, don't be. 934 01:12:48,364 --> 01:12:50,240 -I'm good. -You're so good, dude. You're so good. 935 01:12:50,282 --> 01:12:53,452 -I'm so, so, so proud of you. -I'm proud of you too, dude. 936 01:12:53,494 --> 01:12:55,704 This is the kinda stuff that we always used to talk about. 937 01:12:55,829 --> 01:12:59,041 -Love you -Love you too. Super chill. 938 01:12:59,208 --> 01:13:01,919 The writing was like, just spot on. 939 01:13:01,960 --> 01:13:04,296 You know, it just felt like whoever wrote 940 01:13:04,338 --> 01:13:07,132 this is connecting to this character in a real way. 941 01:13:07,174 --> 01:13:10,010 I know this material pretty well. 942 01:13:10,052 --> 01:13:14,556 My family has suffered from addiction quite a bit. 943 01:13:14,598 --> 01:13:20,604 And like, my dad actually died two months ago and he did heroin for 30 years. 944 01:13:20,646 --> 01:13:24,525 And he was still on heroin the day he died, you know? 945 01:13:24,650 --> 01:13:29,321 And so my entire family has been like, affected by this stuff. 946 01:13:29,696 --> 01:13:32,199 Hey. Canyon, you made it. 947 01:13:32,241 --> 01:13:33,784 -Party animal. -Thank you 948 01:13:33,826 --> 01:13:35,035 How are you doing, man? 949 01:13:35,202 --> 01:13:37,204 -You alright, man? -You doin good, brother? 950 01:13:37,246 --> 01:13:39,832 -Man, I'm doing good, bro, it's good to see you, man. 951 01:13:39,873 --> 01:13:41,750 You're looking good, bro. 952 01:13:41,875 --> 01:13:46,380 I'm not good in front of a lot of people. So that's what makes me nervous. 953 01:13:46,505 --> 01:13:48,799 This is Canyon. He's going to be helping out today too, with y'all 954 01:13:48,841 --> 01:13:52,344 so he's just, kinda doing Grip PA. 955 01:13:54,930 --> 01:13:58,809 -I don't even wanna say the word rain. -It's coming dude. 956 01:13:58,976 --> 01:14:01,186 Take it strides at a time. 957 01:14:01,228 --> 01:14:03,647 I get to hang out with this fool right here. 958 01:14:04,648 --> 01:14:07,943 So life's good, man. Life's good. 959 01:14:07,985 --> 01:14:11,405 -I love that, that's great. -So the people we wanted in the movie are right here. 960 01:14:11,447 --> 01:14:13,782 Everything that needs to be rain proof right now. 961 01:14:13,824 --> 01:14:15,159 I want to cover everything. 962 01:14:15,200 --> 01:14:17,119 Rain! Rain cover. 963 01:14:17,161 --> 01:14:19,746 -Just a little bit of stress that's all. -That's OK. 964 01:14:19,788 --> 01:14:21,206 -It's OK. 965 01:14:21,248 --> 01:14:24,334 Rain, rain go away come back a different day. 966 01:14:30,215 --> 01:14:33,927 This rain needs to stop. I don't know what we're gonna do if it doesn't stop. 967 01:14:33,969 --> 01:14:37,556 We will be... I don't wanna say it. I don't even wanna think it. 968 01:14:37,598 --> 01:14:40,350 -What that we'd have to cancel? -Yeah I don't even wanna say it. 969 01:14:40,392 --> 01:14:42,102 -How - ohh! 970 01:14:43,395 --> 01:14:44,563 Chief lighting technician. 971 01:14:44,605 --> 01:14:47,483 Anything that involves lights, that's me. 972 01:14:47,524 --> 01:14:51,069 We can't shoot, obviously, 973 01:14:51,195 --> 01:14:56,241 and all our gear is very expensive and it doesn't like water. 974 01:14:58,327 --> 01:15:00,078 -This sucks. -Really bad. 975 01:15:00,120 --> 01:15:03,040 -It just, it looks so permanent. -Shit. 976 01:15:03,373 --> 01:15:06,168 Hi. I'm gonna have to close it a little bit, OK? 977 01:15:06,210 --> 01:15:07,544 Great, great. 978 01:15:10,756 --> 01:15:12,716 There's somebody in there. 979 01:15:15,969 --> 01:15:18,931 We'll be swimming pretty soon. 980 01:15:19,556 --> 01:15:22,726 I think we're OK maybe for a bit, then it's supposed to rain again. 981 01:15:22,768 --> 01:15:23,519 -Really? -Yeah. 982 01:15:23,560 --> 01:15:26,855 -How bad does it look? -It's gonna rain all freaking day. 983 01:15:26,897 --> 01:15:28,148 -Here it is, this is rolling in right now. 984 01:15:28,190 --> 01:15:31,860 -That's just what we went through, that little one? -Yes, that little one is what we just went through. 985 01:15:31,902 --> 01:15:32,778 -That's coming. -This is coming. 986 01:15:32,778 --> 01:15:36,198 -Dude, it's like the forecast completely changed from this morning. 987 01:15:36,240 --> 01:15:38,075 But I think we're OK. Maybe for a bit. 988 01:15:38,116 --> 01:15:40,035 OK, picture up. Picture's up! 989 01:15:40,077 --> 01:15:41,870 Hey Seth, What's up, brother. 990 01:15:41,912 --> 01:15:43,747 -Good to see you. -Good to see you too, gimme a hug. 991 01:15:43,789 --> 01:15:46,333 -Great to see you. -Great to see you too, stayed dry? 992 01:15:46,375 --> 01:15:47,084 -Yeah, yeah. 993 01:15:47,125 --> 01:15:50,671 -We got us a window here. -Yeah, let's do it. I'm excited. 994 01:15:50,712 --> 01:15:55,425 -OK, so the scene is you running down the fence post here. 995 01:15:55,467 --> 01:15:58,554 So the idea is jog nice and slow, and then kinda 996 01:15:58,595 --> 01:16:02,224 we want you to pick up speed as you go because you're going to run out of frame. 997 01:16:02,724 --> 01:16:06,895 -Like here? -Yeah, the shot is going to be like this. 998 01:16:07,688 --> 01:16:09,022 Slate up! 999 01:16:09,648 --> 01:16:15,279 -Down a little bit, slate. -Scene one alpha, take one. Mark it. 1000 01:16:17,781 --> 01:16:19,199 Action. 1001 01:16:19,241 --> 01:16:21,368 Go ahead Seth, go. 1002 01:16:31,962 --> 01:16:35,507 Yeah, yeah, you're doing great. Action. 1003 01:16:35,924 --> 01:16:38,427 Yeah, I have no idea when he's exiting frame. 1004 01:16:38,468 --> 01:16:40,721 That's true, you can't see. He never, on this one 1005 01:16:40,762 --> 01:16:44,391 he never left frame, he's like way in the whole time. 1006 01:16:45,934 --> 01:16:49,813 It's going, it's going OK. It's a little frustrating, 1007 01:16:49,980 --> 01:16:51,898 Blocking is a pain in the butt. 1008 01:16:51,940 --> 01:16:55,068 Just to get everybody queued at the same time doing the same thing. 1009 01:16:56,111 --> 01:16:58,280 -Action. -Go, go. Go, Seth. 1010 01:16:58,322 --> 01:16:59,656 Go, go find him. 1011 01:16:59,698 --> 01:17:01,950 Stop, reset, we're still speeding! 1012 01:17:01,992 --> 01:17:03,076 How's that top? 1013 01:17:03,118 --> 01:17:03,619 Oh. 1014 01:17:03,619 --> 01:17:05,162 -You alright? -You good, brother? 1015 01:17:07,748 --> 01:17:10,250 That's what I mean. It's not, it's not... 1016 01:17:10,417 --> 01:17:11,668 It's just a bad tooth. 1017 01:17:11,710 --> 01:17:12,878 Please just give me a second, man. 1018 01:17:12,919 --> 01:17:14,463 Please 1019 01:17:14,504 --> 01:17:16,298 -Stop filming-- -Yeah it's bleeding above the tooth. 1020 01:17:16,340 --> 01:17:17,257 -It's OK though? -Yeah. 1021 01:17:17,299 --> 01:17:18,508 Copy. 1022 01:17:20,761 --> 01:17:23,597 -Ah son of a-- -Take seven, mark it. 1023 01:17:23,639 --> 01:17:25,932 -Give us some room. -Clear the road! 1024 01:17:25,974 --> 01:17:27,017 Action. 1025 01:17:27,392 --> 01:17:29,311 Stop stop stop stop stop. 1026 01:17:29,353 --> 01:17:32,439 Cut. We were in reverse still and we went backwards. 1027 01:17:32,606 --> 01:17:34,566 -You alright? -Yep. 1028 01:17:34,608 --> 01:17:35,359 Let's, can we take a deep breath? Real quick. 1029 01:17:35,359 --> 01:17:38,236 -OK everybody breathe in, everybody in. -Want me to cut? 1030 01:17:38,278 --> 01:17:40,822 -No we're still rolling. Everybody out. 1031 01:17:40,864 --> 01:17:44,993 Cassidy. We're, so we've gotta get, we've gotta get, um. 1032 01:17:45,869 --> 01:17:48,372 Camera action and him action 1033 01:17:48,413 --> 01:17:49,289 -we've got to that figured out -At the same time. 1034 01:17:49,331 --> 01:17:50,082 Because every time he's standing there looking around -Yeah that's why-- 1035 01:17:50,082 --> 01:17:53,794 --but no one said anything, that's why. So we gotta... 1036 01:17:53,835 --> 01:17:54,795 -We gotta get on that. -OK. 1037 01:17:54,836 --> 01:17:59,758 -Let's figure out the best way to do that, because we're-- -I'll talk to him. 1038 01:17:59,925 --> 01:18:03,679 This is a great thing for Cass to be in charge of, you're in charge of talking to Drew 1039 01:18:03,720 --> 01:18:07,641 and talking to the actor, and coordinating every time when you say action what is happening. 1040 01:18:07,683 --> 01:18:09,309 And you're in charge of that. So do it. 1041 01:18:09,351 --> 01:18:10,143 -OK -You got it. 1042 01:18:10,185 --> 01:18:10,852 Got it. 1043 01:18:10,894 --> 01:18:13,480 We're watching you do it. Be a director, here we go. 1044 01:18:13,689 --> 01:18:18,026 -We gotta go! -Actor's action. Action. 1045 01:18:20,362 --> 01:18:24,199 That was a lot smoother. Can we watch it when they get back? 1046 01:18:24,449 --> 01:18:27,244 You know, doesn't feel like it's going to rain again. 1047 01:18:27,285 --> 01:18:32,749 Last time I said that, it started pouring, so don't hold me to it. 1048 01:18:32,791 --> 01:18:37,170 This is it. Here we go. Is this the first shot of our movie? 1049 01:18:57,357 --> 01:18:58,900 -Was that the one? -Cutting. 1050 01:18:58,942 --> 01:19:01,027 -Alright I think we're good. -Check. 1051 01:19:04,072 --> 01:19:05,782 -Rain's starting again. -Yup, here it comes. 1052 01:19:05,824 --> 01:19:07,033 Bitch! 1053 01:19:07,909 --> 01:19:13,540 Generator's all covered right now with a tarp, I mean, it's safe how it is. 1054 01:19:23,133 --> 01:19:25,510 -I can do this. -You got this, brother. 1055 01:19:25,552 --> 01:19:28,555 -I have so much faith in you. It's unreal. -Thank you. 1056 01:19:28,972 --> 01:19:33,685 This is the key scene that sets up the, what's going on in this movie? 1057 01:19:33,727 --> 01:19:37,481 So everybody else has put their reminders of why they're trying to get sober, 1058 01:19:37,522 --> 01:19:40,984 and instead of doing that, he just Pete puts his money on the fence. 1059 01:19:41,026 --> 01:19:43,361 I don't like being on the fence, man. That doesn't sound good. 1060 01:19:43,403 --> 01:19:45,572 -That's why, that's the layers, right? -Right. 1061 01:19:45,614 --> 01:19:48,200 Do I want to get sober or do I not wanna get sober? 1062 01:19:48,241 --> 01:19:51,870 Definitely want to. 1063 01:19:52,037 --> 01:19:54,790 It's crazy how you like rationalize like, OK 1064 01:19:54,831 --> 01:19:59,252 you know, I'm never doing this again, but this? Then you slip. 1065 01:19:59,294 --> 01:20:02,214 I don't wanna, I don't wanna be high anymore, dude. 1066 01:20:02,380 --> 01:20:06,051 I really don't. I'm not happy when I'm high. 1067 01:20:06,092 --> 01:20:10,013 -Camera speed. -And action. 1068 01:20:12,224 --> 01:20:16,436 Keep rolling, stop, stop, freeze, ready? Keep rolling. 1069 01:20:16,603 --> 01:20:19,731 -What's the next line? -Never thought my life would come to this. 1070 01:20:19,773 --> 01:20:20,899 Cut! 1071 01:20:20,941 --> 01:20:22,400 Alright, armadillo. 1072 01:20:26,947 --> 01:20:28,615 We're in trouble. 1073 01:20:28,782 --> 01:20:30,826 We're in trouble. If this doesn't stop-- 1074 01:20:30,867 --> 01:20:34,037 -Everybody find cover. -Everybody cover! 1075 01:20:34,246 --> 01:20:37,791 We don't have enough money to cancel the day 1076 01:20:37,833 --> 01:20:40,168 and say, "oh, we'll get it next weekend," like that doesn't exist. 1077 01:20:40,210 --> 01:20:42,087 -We have two days and that's it. -Alright. 1078 01:20:42,128 --> 01:20:43,713 Let's not, let's not even think there yet. 1079 01:20:43,755 --> 01:20:46,049 Let's not even get, let's not get to tomorrow yet. 1080 01:20:46,091 --> 01:20:48,468 Let's, let's live in the moment. Let's be here. 1081 01:20:51,096 --> 01:20:56,142 Now we're about to do some rotten armadillo, so hopefully my lunch doesn't come up. 1082 01:20:56,560 --> 01:20:59,020 Double bagged it, I like that, I like that. 1083 01:20:59,062 --> 01:21:00,856 Oh my God, there it is. 1084 01:21:00,939 --> 01:21:02,816 Oh, it's so ripe. 1085 01:21:03,984 --> 01:21:06,903 Look at it. Oh my gosh it's so gross. 1086 01:21:06,945 --> 01:21:09,197 Oh, my God. 1087 01:21:11,283 --> 01:21:13,743 -Spot that light in just a tiny bit. -There we go! 1088 01:21:13,785 --> 01:21:18,206 -Now pan with him if you will. -And action. 1089 01:21:20,750 --> 01:21:23,169 -This is my mom and sister. 1090 01:21:23,211 --> 01:21:24,671 -You're good -Hey! 1091 01:21:24,713 --> 01:21:26,631 They came out to see me. 1092 01:21:28,592 --> 01:21:31,845 Do you think making movies will keep him out of drugs? 1093 01:21:33,972 --> 01:21:35,432 Honestly? 1094 01:21:35,473 --> 01:21:36,725 Probably not. 1095 01:21:37,225 --> 01:21:40,520 I wouldn't think so. I mean, no. 1096 01:21:40,562 --> 01:21:42,022 I wouldn't... 1097 01:21:42,355 --> 01:21:43,440 Because other things have happened to him 1098 01:21:43,481 --> 01:21:47,903 that you would think would help him stay outta drugs and it never has, I don't see... 1099 01:21:47,944 --> 01:21:48,403 I don't think... 1100 01:21:48,570 --> 01:21:52,115 No, I think he has a sabotage thing going. 1101 01:21:52,157 --> 01:21:54,492 He'll ruin it for himself. 1102 01:21:54,534 --> 01:21:56,536 I would hope he wouldn't, but... 1103 01:21:56,578 --> 01:21:58,663 It's Cass. 1104 01:22:27,484 --> 01:22:28,526 Yesterday we didn't ruin a movie 1105 01:22:28,568 --> 01:22:33,531 but we didn't make a great movie yet. Today we either make a great movie or we don't. 1106 01:22:33,990 --> 01:22:38,995 Having to tell someone like a family member off and like cutting them out, 1107 01:22:39,037 --> 01:22:41,831 I've unfortunately kind of had to do that quite recently. 1108 01:22:41,873 --> 01:22:45,377 So I do connect with the character in that way. 1109 01:22:49,047 --> 01:22:51,466 I'm more nervous today than I was yesterday. 1110 01:22:51,508 --> 01:22:53,927 I feel like I'm gonna puke at any time. 1111 01:22:53,969 --> 01:22:55,387 I mean, I don't blame him. 1112 01:22:55,428 --> 01:22:58,014 It has a lot of stress, but... 1113 01:22:58,098 --> 01:23:02,227 That's what he's gotta do, you know, he is the director of this bad boy, so 1114 01:23:02,268 --> 01:23:05,939 he's gonna have to just jam it out and roll with the punches. 1115 01:23:10,527 --> 01:23:13,321 Ok here we go, we're quiet on set! 1116 01:23:14,406 --> 01:23:16,574 And action! 1117 01:23:16,700 --> 01:23:19,619 So what are you doing in town? 1118 01:23:19,661 --> 01:23:23,790 Just on my way out actually. Just meeting family. 1119 01:23:24,499 --> 01:23:26,251 You lie often? 1120 01:23:27,043 --> 01:23:32,674 -How so? -Dropouts from the recovery center come here all the time. 1121 01:23:32,716 --> 01:23:35,260 Cut! Be looking around more for like 1122 01:23:35,301 --> 01:23:38,054 you're waiting for the wait, wait. 1123 01:23:38,096 --> 01:23:40,390 You guys are great, I'm loving it. 1124 01:23:40,432 --> 01:23:42,267 Good job, everybody! 1125 01:23:42,308 --> 01:23:44,394 -OK, so we're gonna go to a medium shot-- -Then a medium. 1126 01:23:44,436 --> 01:23:47,313 -Then a medium on her then-- -A medium two shot, right? 1127 01:23:47,355 --> 01:23:49,149 -Yeah, yeah. Dirty frame medium, yeah. 1128 01:23:49,190 --> 01:23:51,026 And action! 1129 01:23:53,695 --> 01:23:58,366 I love the atmosphere right now, you know, everyone's in high spirits. 1130 01:23:58,408 --> 01:23:59,492 He's staying sober he's working through 1131 01:23:59,534 --> 01:24:04,748 his problems and you can see it in real life like he's not who he used to be, you know, and 1132 01:24:04,789 --> 01:24:07,500 for people to say, oh yeah, "once and addict, always an addict." 1133 01:24:07,542 --> 01:24:11,254 That's crap. Because I see so much in Cassidy. 1134 01:24:11,296 --> 01:24:13,715 It's about the best thing that ever happened to our family. 1135 01:24:13,757 --> 01:24:14,716 Placing the beer can down, 1136 01:24:14,758 --> 01:24:19,179 be a little bit more like, oh, you know, yeah, you don't wanna get caught! 1137 01:24:19,220 --> 01:24:22,265 Know what I mean, your mom's pulling up you're trying to go back home from rehab 1138 01:24:22,307 --> 01:24:24,642 and gotta beer in your hand. 1139 01:24:28,313 --> 01:24:30,148 Hold for sound! 1140 01:24:34,736 --> 01:24:36,613 Still holding. 1141 01:24:37,155 --> 01:24:41,284 -This is my new mom for the day. -Yes, we're taking selfies 1142 01:24:41,326 --> 01:24:42,869 Follow us on Facebook. 1143 01:24:43,411 --> 01:24:44,329 Oh, I think he's doing way better today. 1144 01:24:44,370 --> 01:24:49,250 Probably feels more comfortable, but you know hey, it was his first time. 1145 01:24:49,292 --> 01:24:51,628 Yeah first day jitters. 1146 01:24:58,259 --> 01:24:59,928 We're behind schedule. 1147 01:25:03,181 --> 01:25:05,642 OK we ready? Speed it! 1148 01:25:05,683 --> 01:25:06,976 OK here we go. 1149 01:25:07,018 --> 01:25:08,228 Scene four kilo, take two 1150 01:25:10,105 --> 01:25:12,148 And action. 1151 01:25:29,249 --> 01:25:31,918 He's gonna lay out a line on that toilet paper thing, right? 1152 01:25:31,960 --> 01:25:35,171 You wanna do a line? Is this supposed to be heroin? 1153 01:25:35,213 --> 01:25:37,465 -A line of heroin? -Yeah forsure 1154 01:25:37,507 --> 01:25:40,426 -I would, I would just do it in the palm of my hand, like. 1155 01:25:40,468 --> 01:25:43,847 -Wait what? -Confession time, guys. I have 19 years sober. 1156 01:25:43,888 --> 01:25:45,473 -Oh, wait really? -Yeah. 1157 01:25:45,515 --> 01:25:46,015 -Yeah! 1158 01:25:46,057 --> 01:25:48,268 -So if I were going to do that, -Yeah. 1159 01:25:48,309 --> 01:25:51,563 -It would just be in the web of my finger. -OK here we go. 1160 01:25:51,604 --> 01:25:54,107 -Camera speed. -Three take one, marker. 1161 01:25:56,568 --> 01:25:59,070 -Take two. -Action. 1162 01:26:08,621 --> 01:26:10,748 We're just trying to get this shot figured out. 1163 01:26:10,790 --> 01:26:13,710 The sun will be behind those trees in no time, so... 1164 01:26:13,751 --> 01:26:17,172 Like, we don't have till sundown, we have till sun hits those trees. 1165 01:26:17,213 --> 01:26:21,885 We're about to do probably like the biggest scene and the sun's going down, so... 1166 01:26:22,051 --> 01:26:24,679 I don't know how you do that without lighting, but it's fine 1167 01:26:24,721 --> 01:26:26,139 we'll figure something out. 1168 01:26:26,181 --> 01:26:28,266 Scene six bravo, take one. 1169 01:26:28,933 --> 01:26:34,147 A good majority of the people that are drug users, they have a lot of mental illness, 1170 01:26:34,189 --> 01:26:37,483 so it's not a fact of, they just wanna go take a pill to get high. 1171 01:26:37,525 --> 01:26:41,196 No, they're taking a pill because they've got anxiety or they're sad all 1172 01:26:41,237 --> 01:26:44,949 the time or they just don't feel like feeling like they feel every day. 1173 01:26:44,991 --> 01:26:49,829 Trying to find whatever you can to make yourself feel normal like everybody else. 1174 01:26:50,038 --> 01:26:53,166 Who are you to judge me? 1175 01:26:55,710 --> 01:26:57,086 I can get clean at home. Just give me-- 1176 01:26:57,128 --> 01:26:59,130 --You don't get it. 1177 01:26:59,964 --> 01:27:02,175 You're out of control. 1178 01:27:02,467 --> 01:27:04,844 Mom, do you see it? 1179 01:27:04,886 --> 01:27:07,931 Do you see it clearly now? This isn't Peter. 1180 01:27:07,972 --> 01:27:09,766 It's the drugs speaking. 1181 01:27:10,141 --> 01:27:14,479 It's always going to be the drugs. 1182 01:27:15,396 --> 01:27:17,565 -Cut -So good. 1183 01:27:17,941 --> 01:27:18,983 So good. 1184 01:27:19,484 --> 01:27:22,070 Like you're whispering it. "Do you love me? 1185 01:27:22,111 --> 01:27:24,822 Do your actions say you love me?" 1186 01:27:24,948 --> 01:27:29,035 Feeling anxious right now. We're definitely running out of day. 1187 01:27:34,040 --> 01:27:36,542 That's dark, and that should be blue sky. 1188 01:27:36,584 --> 01:27:40,588 I mean, this is like we're shooting back into what should be daylight, and it's dark. 1189 01:27:40,922 --> 01:27:47,095 It's like clear skies all around us, a few miles each way, and then just a 1190 01:27:47,220 --> 01:27:53,017 dark gray sky on top of us, so it might be about to pour. 1191 01:28:00,191 --> 01:28:02,151 I got it are you rolling? 1192 01:28:02,277 --> 01:28:03,945 Action! 1193 01:28:04,404 --> 01:28:07,532 -I just need her arms to be wiped. -Yeah. Wipe her arms! 1194 01:28:07,573 --> 01:28:12,704 You're just gonna step into the hug. Like all the way, just walk all the way to his belly. 1195 01:28:12,745 --> 01:28:14,664 -Still speeding! -Watch your shadow! 1196 01:28:14,706 --> 01:28:15,915 Here we go! 1197 01:28:16,165 --> 01:28:17,834 We don't have it? 1198 01:28:19,043 --> 01:28:20,378 Go, just try one! 1199 01:28:20,420 --> 01:28:23,589 Ready and move to the hug. Go Becky. 1200 01:28:23,631 --> 01:28:25,925 OK good, cut cut cut get out! Get out! 1201 01:28:25,967 --> 01:28:28,511 -Save the light! -Keep the cover on the camera! 1202 01:28:28,761 --> 01:28:30,596 You got an umbrella, got an umbrella! 1203 01:28:32,098 --> 01:28:33,433 What else goes, lights? 1204 01:28:38,021 --> 01:28:40,606 That's not good, we just lost Judy coming out with the donuts. 1205 01:28:40,648 --> 01:28:43,443 The headache in that moment. 1206 01:28:47,030 --> 01:28:49,449 Well, that's it. 1207 01:28:49,490 --> 01:28:51,784 We'll see if we can make it work. 1208 01:28:59,917 --> 01:29:07,633 I'm just holding on. I keep holding on. 1209 01:29:07,675 --> 01:29:15,641 I'm just holding on. Holding on, and I won't let go my faith. 1210 01:29:38,456 --> 01:29:42,919 Father God, we lift these men up to you tonight, father, we ask that you would continue to guide them. 1211 01:29:43,044 --> 01:29:44,921 Father, thank you so much 1212 01:29:44,962 --> 01:29:48,674 for these precious souls that you have redeemed tonight. 1213 01:29:48,716 --> 01:29:51,677 Cover them, oh God I pray. Use them, oh God I pray. 1214 01:29:51,719 --> 01:29:56,641 Position them, oh God I pray. Bless them, oh God, I pray tonight. 1215 01:29:56,682 --> 01:29:59,519 -In Jesus name, Amen. -Amen. 1216 01:30:30,925 --> 01:30:35,805 My brother hooked me up with this job, and I'm an electrician, a low voltage 1217 01:30:35,847 --> 01:30:40,143 electrician, which is something I never thought I would do. 1218 01:30:42,520 --> 01:30:44,897 What do I think God is like? 1219 01:30:48,234 --> 01:30:55,158 God is like a new person in recovery who has the light turned on for the first time 1220 01:30:55,199 --> 01:30:59,787 and realizes that they're not a piece of shit, 1221 01:31:00,204 --> 01:31:03,833 you know, that people love them. 1222 01:32:12,360 --> 01:32:16,656 Gotta deal with this, it's awesome. This is the start of dreams right here. 1223 01:32:24,997 --> 01:32:27,583 Welcome to first night at the Atlanta Film Festival 1224 01:32:27,625 --> 01:32:30,836 locals-only short film block. 1225 01:33:03,786 --> 01:33:06,872 There's a part of me that would like to just crawl in a hole and hide 1226 01:33:06,914 --> 01:33:10,001 because there's a part of, because basically, 1227 01:33:10,876 --> 01:33:13,546 I'm basically...I don't know... 1228 01:34:22,073 --> 01:34:23,491 Peter. 1229 01:34:24,116 --> 01:34:25,743 Do you love me? 1230 01:34:25,868 --> 01:34:29,622 Do your actions say that you love me? 1231 01:34:29,747 --> 01:34:35,086 From now on, my actions will match my love for you. 1232 01:34:35,127 --> 01:34:38,756 If you graduate, I'll be there to watch.