1
00:00:51,969 --> 00:00:54,388
- Hey, Stuart.
- Bert.

2
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:56,265
Got anything new?

3
00:00:57,724 --> 00:00:58,850
Funny every time.

4
00:01:01,853 --> 00:01:04,731
I think I'm ready to pull
the trigger on <i>Batman 608.</i>

5
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:07,442
Excellent choice.

6
00:01:08,026 --> 00:01:09,194
What's the trade?

7
00:01:09,278 --> 00:01:12,823
What would you say to a can of lima beans?

8
00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:16,118
Oh, geez, Bert, come on!
This is near mint.

9
00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:18,745
I could probably get a couple
Dinty Moore Beef Stews for this.

10
00:01:18,829 --> 00:01:20,080
Plus...

11
00:01:20,872 --> 00:01:22,332
cream corn.

12
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:26,962
Okay. I was saving it for my birthday,
but I guess I'll throw it in.

13
00:01:28,130 --> 00:01:29,590
Fancy Feast.

14
00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:31,341
What flavor?

15
00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:33,010
- Salmon.
- Sold.

16
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:35,178
- Yay!
- Are you crazy?

17
00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:37,598
Hawkeye doesn't deserve to be an Avenger.

18
00:01:37,681 --> 00:01:39,808
Yeah-- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
You do not want to go there.

19
00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:43,312
You got a guy with a bow and arrow,
and he's supposed to be on the same team

20
00:01:43,395 --> 00:01:47,774
as a guy with an Arc Reactor iron suit
and the literal God of Thunder?

21
00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:49,109
What sense does that even make?

22
00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:52,070
I don't know, I mean...
Does this make sense?

23
00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:59,911
I just mopped! We talked about this, Kyle!

24
00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:03,624
- That's strike three!
- I'm sorry, okay? But you heard him.

25
00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:07,419
Sorry. He started it.

26
00:02:08,337 --> 00:02:09,379
Unbelievable.

27
00:02:09,421 --> 00:02:11,632
- Give me a hand.
- Oh, yeah.

28
00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:14,551
You know, I feel the same way
about Green Arrow.

29
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:16,970
Yeah, we all do
but you don't have to kill people.

30
00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:22,017
Bye!

31
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,811
- You ever wonder where this thing goes?
- Nope.

32
00:02:25,395 --> 00:02:27,022
- Probably smart.
- Stuart.

33
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:30,901
We gotta talk.

34
00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:34,696
Shit just got weird.

35
00:03:11,566 --> 00:03:13,360
Do you have an identical twin brother?

36
00:03:13,944 --> 00:03:15,070
No.

37
00:03:15,153 --> 00:03:16,988
- Okay, I have two questions.
- Just two?

38
00:03:17,072 --> 00:03:20,075
I've only got a few seconds
to explain this, so you gotta focus.

39
00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:22,202
- Who are you?
- First question.

40
00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:24,996
I'm you from another stream of reality.

41
00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:27,499
Well, that answers that. Second question--

42
00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:28,625
Listen to me.

43
00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:32,587
This apocalyptic nightmare
that you are living in,

44
00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,923
it can be avoided, it never has to happen.

45
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:37,300
Okay, now I have, like, six questions.

46
00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:39,553
- He can't be me.
- He looks like you.

47
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:42,514
Senior prom, Emily Manhart,
peach schnapps.

48
00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,474
She was ready to go. You puked in her lap.

49
00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:45,976
Sounds like you.

50
00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:49,730
- At least I went to my senior prom.
- I couldn't go. I had mono.

51
00:03:49,813 --> 00:03:51,273
Please, I don't have a lot of time.

52
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:54,651
Leonard Hofstadter,
Sheldon Cooper, Howard Wolowitz.

53
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,903
- Remember them?
- Yeah, real nerds.

54
00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,113
Pot-kettle.

55
00:03:58,196 --> 00:03:59,322
- Sure.
- Fair enough.

56
00:03:59,948 --> 00:04:04,911
Anyway, they invented some kind
of quantum entanglement thing,

57
00:04:04,995 --> 00:04:06,830
and you were there when it malfunctioned.

58
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,081
Both of us or just him?

59
00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:10,250
- Doesn't matter!
- It matters to me.

60
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:14,045
The point is, it altered reality.
None of this is supposed to be.

61
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:17,591
- And by none of this, you mean...
- None of it!

62
00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:23,430
The violence, the devastation,
the dimensional rifts!

63
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:26,391
- Dimensional rifts!
- Now we know.

64
00:04:26,475 --> 00:04:28,727
None of this is normal.

65
00:04:31,313 --> 00:04:33,356
- Certainly not that!
- The big moth?

66
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:36,526
Yes! Yes! The big moth!

67
00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:39,029
If you turn the lights off,
they don't bother you.

68
00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:43,450
You can put everything right.
You can make it the way it was.

69
00:04:43,533 --> 00:04:46,495
- You just have to find the--
- Hang on. Hang on!

70
00:04:47,037 --> 00:04:50,916
If you're me from another reality,
how can you be in this one?

71
00:04:50,999 --> 00:04:53,001
I don't know. I'm not a quantum physicist.

72
00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:54,836
I went to the Rhode Island
School of Design.

73
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,297
- I didn't know that.
- Oh, yeah, I have a BFA.

74
00:04:57,380 --> 00:04:59,508
Really? How come
you never did anything with it?

75
00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:01,676
What am I gonna do,
teach high school kids how to draw fruit?

76
00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,595
Guys, please!

77
00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:06,556
The machine is still at Caltech.
Here's what you have to do.

78
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,725
Hang on, let me write this down.

79
00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:12,020
"Cal... "

80
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:13,772
Oh, shoot!

81
00:05:14,356 --> 00:05:17,400
- What is shaking it gonna do?
- Stop talking and listen.

82
00:05:17,484 --> 00:05:19,903
You know,
I might have a Sharpie, excuse me.

83
00:05:21,238 --> 00:05:23,406
Listen!

84
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:25,617
When you get to the machine...

85
00:05:28,078 --> 00:05:29,788
- Damn it!
- W... What's happening?

86
00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:33,625
I don't know!
I'm going through some kind of wormhole!

87
00:05:33,750 --> 00:05:36,127
The important thing is...

88
00:05:39,756 --> 00:05:41,675
And... And when you find him...

89
00:05:44,845 --> 00:05:47,973
and that will fix everything.

90
00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:53,478
You get any of that?

91
00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:55,856
I got the gist.

92
00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:06,992
Nice catch, Steve!

93
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:11,037
- How is it out there?
- It's a little nippy. Wear layers.

94
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:15,208
Shall we?

95
00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:19,087
I don't know. I'm having second thoughts.

96
00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:21,882
What are you talking about?
We've been given a quest.

97
00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:25,302
- Yeah, but do we believe that guy?
- That guy was you.

98
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:28,263
That's my point.
When did we start listening to me?

99
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:31,266
Maybe we have a chance to fix the world.

100
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:33,268
I don't know, I think it's important
to ask the question.

101
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,186
Is this reality that bad?

102
00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:39,441
I think there's room for improvement.

103
00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:50,493
What are you doing?

104
00:06:51,036 --> 00:06:53,246
What's it look like?
I'm trying to get us to Caltech.

105
00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:54,748
With a Thomas Guide?

106
00:06:55,248 --> 00:07:00,003
I would've used the GPS on my iPhone,
but civilization seemed to have collapsed.

107
00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:02,672
Check it out.

108
00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,009
Juggling two--

109
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:12,182
Juggling two starving feral creatures,
as you can see, is not difficult, but...

110
00:07:13,475 --> 00:07:18,688
juggling three is... is profoundly stupid.

111
00:07:19,981 --> 00:07:21,733
I saw them in Vegas.

112
00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:23,610
Such a fun night.

113
00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:26,738
You know who I loved in Vegas
and I didn't think I would?

114
00:07:26,821 --> 00:07:28,281
Celine Dion.

115
00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:30,575
I'm sorry.

116
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:37,207
All right.

117
00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,126
Oh, yeah.

118
00:07:46,091 --> 00:07:47,300
Thank you!

119
00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:51,388
We are Penn and Teller
and we'll be here until we're dead!

120
00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:09,072
Moth.

121
00:08:13,827 --> 00:08:17,580
Oh, my God, look. Floss.

122
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:20,709
- Just hurry. It's getting dark.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

123
00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:23,712
Excuse me, how much for a foot of floss?

124
00:08:23,795 --> 00:08:26,381
- Mint or regular?
- Let me get the regular.

125
00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:35,390
Thank you. Oh, yeah, look at that.

126
00:08:36,391 --> 00:08:38,351
Can't put a price on healthy gums.

127
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:45,984
- This feels so good.
- Go easy. We're sharing that.

128
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:49,904
Not a good sound.

129
00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:54,367
Stuart?

130
00:08:55,910 --> 00:08:56,911
Denise?

131
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:59,497
- I thought you were dead.
- I thought you were dead!

132
00:09:00,915 --> 00:09:03,126
So, what have you been up to?

133
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:05,628
Robbing mostly.
Still working on my screenplay.

134
00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,922
- Good for you.
- Yeah. How have you been?

135
00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:10,508
- Okay. Still got the store.
- That's great.

136
00:09:10,592 --> 00:09:11,593
What's going on?

137
00:09:12,302 --> 00:09:13,803
Don't worry, Gary. I know these guys.

138
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:16,347
So, we're not robbing, we're not killing?
What are we doing?

139
00:09:16,431 --> 00:09:20,268
- You remember I mentioned Stuart?
- Sure. How's it going? Gary.

140
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:21,394
Hi.

141
00:09:22,353 --> 00:09:24,064
So, are you two...

142
00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:26,232
You gotta remember,
I thought you were dead.

143
00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:28,234
Yeah, no, right, right, yeah.

144
00:09:28,318 --> 00:09:30,737
Funny story, actually,
Gary was seeing my friend Lisa.

145
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,322
Nice girl. Yeah, Jewish.

146
00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:35,742
Yeah, and anyway, Lisa got eaten
by cannibals in Sherman Oaks.

147
00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,535
Oh, no.

148
00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:39,412
Human meat isn't kosher,

149
00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:42,832
but I guess that only matters
if the cannibals are also Jewish.

150
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,254
Anyway, we, you know,
comforted each other.

151
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:50,673
- The lady has skills, am I right?
- Well...

152
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:55,220
To be honest,
I mostly focused on my own performance.

153
00:09:56,763 --> 00:10:00,892
- Anyway, we gotta go.
- Yeah, Caltech. We're on a quest.

154
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:03,853
There's no more Caltech.
What's left of it is a death trap.

155
00:10:03,937 --> 00:10:05,105
We don't have a choice.

156
00:10:05,188 --> 00:10:07,732
Yeah, an alternate version of me
came from another universe

157
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,776
and explained
how I can undo the apocalypse.

158
00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:13,154
- It was really cool.
- An alternate version of you?

159
00:10:13,238 --> 00:10:15,615
Yeah, same pasty face
and same whiny voice.

160
00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:17,033
It was like looking in a mirror.

161
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:19,410
Well, good luck.

162
00:10:19,494 --> 00:10:22,205
- Yeah, nice to see you.
- Yeah, you too.

163
00:10:22,705 --> 00:10:25,542
Have fun with the... looting and stuff.

164
00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:27,919
Ciao.

165
00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:34,425
- They're gonna die.
- Oh, yeah.

166
00:10:40,390 --> 00:10:44,269
- That looks bad.
- Because of all the guns?

167
00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:47,272
Yes, because of all the guns.

168
00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:53,778
- Denise, what are you doing?
- Trying to keep you alive.

169
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:56,197
I don't care about your life.
I'm just hoping to get laid tonight.

170
00:10:56,281 --> 00:10:57,282
Gary.

171
00:10:57,365 --> 00:10:58,366
- Very kind.
- Thank you.

172
00:10:58,449 --> 00:11:00,994
- What's your plan?
- No, I don't really have one.

173
00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:03,830
- I'm kind of new to the action genre.
- All right, here's how we do this.

174
00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:05,373
I'll create a distraction
at the main gate.

175
00:11:05,456 --> 00:11:07,917
The three of you cut around to the side
where the trucks are going in.

176
00:11:07,959 --> 00:11:09,002
Yeah, then what?

177
00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:13,464
When the trucks stop, you roll under them,
grab the undercarriage, and ride on in.

178
00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:15,508
You, sir, have done this before.

179
00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:17,594
Well, back in the day,
I was Army Special Forces.

180
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:20,096
Cool. I was a geologist.

181
00:11:21,639 --> 00:11:22,807
- We ready?
- Yeah.

182
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:28,396
- Hang on. So... So, roll, run, grab?
- Run, roll, grab.

183
00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:33,860
- Sorry, more of a visual learner.
- On three. One, two, three!

184
00:11:36,279 --> 00:11:37,614
Oh, my God, Gary!

185
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:40,033
- Don't move!
- Hands in the air!

186
00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:46,456
Tell them
about the alternate version of you.

187
00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:49,000
Oh, my gosh, Gary.

188
00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:52,212
It's terrible. Just terrible.
But you know what?

189
00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:54,380
You... You're gonna find somebody else.

190
00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:56,799
Maybe sooner than you think.

191
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,177
Get in there!

192
00:12:00,929 --> 00:12:03,223
- Wow!
- What?

193
00:12:03,306 --> 00:12:05,725
This used to be my Geology classroom.

194
00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:09,479
- I opened so many young minds here.
- Can you keep it down?

195
00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:12,148
Raj?

196
00:12:14,525 --> 00:12:16,110
Maybe. Possibly.

197
00:12:16,945 --> 00:12:18,154
Who wants to know?

198
00:12:18,947 --> 00:12:21,241
Raj, it's me, Stuart,
from the comic book store.

199
00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:25,119
Stuart?

200
00:12:25,203 --> 00:12:28,414
Yes, and... and Bert Kibbler.
You know Bert?

201
00:12:28,498 --> 00:12:31,000
- Bert?
- And Denise. Remember Denise?

202
00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:36,172
This isn't real.
This is... This is a hallucination!

203
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,508
No. No, no, no. We're here. It's real.

204
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:41,094
That's kind of what
a hallucination would say.

205
00:12:42,845 --> 00:12:46,140
- What are you doing here?
- Isn't it obvious? I'm in a locked room.

206
00:12:46,224 --> 00:12:49,018
I haven't changed my underwear in years,
and I crap in a bucket!

207
00:12:50,311 --> 00:12:51,604
So, you're like a prisoner?

208
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:54,983
I rode an elephant to my wedding
and now I crap in a bucket!

209
00:12:55,066 --> 00:12:56,276
Congratulations.

210
00:12:57,402 --> 00:13:00,238
- On the wedding thing.
- Yeah, a moth ate her.

211
00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:05,827
Anyway, I... I've had time
to... to... to figure it all out,

212
00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:08,663
and there's definitely something wrong
with this reality.

213
00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:12,750
See? I prove it here and here,
and the numbers, they don't lie.

214
00:13:12,834 --> 00:13:15,086
- So, you were telling the truth?
- You didn't believe me?

215
00:13:15,169 --> 00:13:17,380
That an alternate version of you
told you how to save the universe?

216
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:19,007
No, not for a minute.

217
00:13:19,090 --> 00:13:23,553
Pay attention!
Leonard, Sheldon, and Howard.

218
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:27,307
They built a vari-state
quantum interference device.

219
00:13:27,390 --> 00:13:28,766
That would have been my guess.

220
00:13:28,850 --> 00:13:31,811
It malfunctioned,
and it changed everything, right?

221
00:13:31,894 --> 00:13:34,605
The universe, history, reality.

222
00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:36,649
Yeah, yeah, great.
How... How do we fix it?

223
00:13:36,733 --> 00:13:39,110
Yeah, that's a toughie. Why, you ask?

224
00:13:39,777 --> 00:13:41,779
Wait, did you ask? I assume you ask.

225
00:13:41,863 --> 00:13:46,117
It's a toughie because we're all prisoners
of the Evil One.

226
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:52,123
And the Evil One likes everything
to stay just as it is.

227
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:54,834
Who's the Evil One?

228
00:13:56,878 --> 00:14:00,131
I can't say his name!
If I say his name, bad things happen.

229
00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:02,925
Sorry, is it Voldemort?

230
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:05,053
I wish it was Voldemort.
That's a guy you can reason with.

231
00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:06,220
But--

232
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:09,724
If we got to the device,
you could really reset the universe?

233
00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:11,851
Bing, bang, boom! But it's hopeless!

234
00:14:11,934 --> 00:14:14,979
That device,
it's surrounded by armed guards, 24/7!

235
00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:17,398
No, it's not hopeless.
The alternate me said

236
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:19,484
that I'm the chosen one
who'll set things right.

237
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:21,694
He didn't say "chosen."

238
00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:26,741
- Well, he implied "chosen."
- Boy, I did not get that at all.

239
00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:28,743
All kneel...

240
00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:32,789
for the Grand Caliph of South Pasadena,
Flintridge, and Monrovia!

241
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,541
The Supreme Ruler
of the San Gabriel Valley!

242
00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:37,126
I'm not kneeling for anybody!

243
00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:39,587
Okay, yeah.

244
00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:44,300
Hello, pwisoners.

245
00:14:44,926 --> 00:14:46,719
- Kripke?
- Ward Kripke.

246
00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:48,137
Not Ward. "Word."

247
00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:51,140
- What... What'd I say?
- You said "Ward," and--

248
00:14:51,224 --> 00:14:54,143
This is The Evil One? Barry Kripke?

249
00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:57,814
He's sorry. Please.
He doesn't know. Show him mercy.

250
00:14:57,897 --> 00:15:02,944
Mercy? I am nothing if not merciful.
Troubadours sing of my mercy!

251
00:15:03,027 --> 00:15:06,614
- You mind if we stand up?
- No one stands before Ward Kripke.

252
00:15:06,697 --> 00:15:09,492
Okay, wast time,
it's "Word," not "Ward."

253
00:15:09,575 --> 00:15:10,785
Go ahead, stand, doesn't matter.

254
00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:15,623
With all due respect, my liege,
how is it that you're the... the grand...

255
00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:18,626
- Cawiph.
- ...Caliph of South Pasadena?

256
00:15:18,709 --> 00:15:21,087
I suppose we have time
for a wittle backstory.

257
00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:24,006
I apologize.
You guys have heard this before.

258
00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:29,554
When everything went screwy
and civilization as we know it cowapsed,

259
00:15:29,637 --> 00:15:32,932
a vacuum of weadership
was created here at the university,

260
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:36,018
and as we all know...

261
00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,187
Nature abhors a vacuum?

262
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:44,193
Wight-o. So, I seized power,
got all the food, the guns, and the girls.

263
00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:46,946
Yeah, end of backstory.

264
00:15:47,029 --> 00:15:49,490
But this world is a living nightmare.
Don't you wanna put things right?

265
00:15:49,574 --> 00:15:53,077
Were you not wistening?
I... I got all the girls.

266
00:15:53,161 --> 00:15:54,662
By the way...

267
00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:57,206
are you... you seeing anyone or...

268
00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:58,875
- She's with me.
- No, I'm not.

269
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,252
I'm trying to protect you.

270
00:16:02,962 --> 00:16:04,964
Take the wench, wash her,
bring her to my woom.

271
00:16:05,047 --> 00:16:07,341
- I'd rather die!
- I understand.

272
00:16:08,176 --> 00:16:09,218
Wash her and kill her.

273
00:16:09,302 --> 00:16:10,678
- What? No!
- No, no, no.

274
00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:12,263
- Hey, hey, hey!
- What are you doing? Let go!

275
00:16:12,346 --> 00:16:13,973
- Hands off!
- Let me go! Get off of me!

276
00:16:14,056 --> 00:16:15,808
Hands off! Hey, hey! Hey!

277
00:16:17,435 --> 00:16:19,854
<i>Stuart, please come back.</i>

278
00:16:19,937 --> 00:16:22,148
Move towards the light!

279
00:16:23,733 --> 00:16:28,070
- No.
- Come on, wake up. I've got an idea.

280
00:16:29,739 --> 00:16:32,575
- What-- Denise. Where's Denise?
- They took her.

281
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:35,328
No, no! No, no, no, no!
I have to do something!

282
00:16:35,411 --> 00:16:36,579
Or...

283
00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:39,832
- Or what?
- You move on, you meet someone new,

284
00:16:39,916 --> 00:16:41,834
and they get eaten by a moth
on your honeymoon.

285
00:16:41,918 --> 00:16:44,712
- Excuse me, I have an idea.
- Go ahead.

286
00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:49,926
Like I said, this used to be
my Geology classroom.

287
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:52,803
It's filled with all kinds
of rock samples.

288
00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:56,516
So, we're gonna throw rocks
at men with guns?

289
00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:58,893
'Cause if you don't know,
rock beats scissors, not gun.

290
00:16:58,976 --> 00:17:02,271
We're not gonna throw rocks.
We're gonna make bombs out of them.

291
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:04,440
- What?
- Behold.

292
00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,944
Potassium. And some water.

293
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,571
Everybody needs
to step back a little, please.

294
00:17:18,913 --> 00:17:22,375
- Cool, huh?
- Yeah, if the guards are taking a bath.

295
00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:25,920
No. We're gonna make grenades.

296
00:17:27,838 --> 00:17:31,092
- How come I never thought of that?
- Don't be hard on yourself.

297
00:17:31,175 --> 00:17:35,680
Most people underestimate
the mighty force that is geology.

298
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,605
Sorry, fellas. Time to die.

299
00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,233
Agreed. Catch.

300
00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:49,026
What the...

301
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:55,449
- I love you!
- I love you too.

302
00:17:55,533 --> 00:17:57,285
Let's go!

303
00:18:42,079 --> 00:18:43,623
So, what were you in the before times?

304
00:18:43,706 --> 00:18:46,292
- No talking.
- Come on, I'm gonna die anyway.

305
00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,796
I had a podcast. Vitamins, gut health.

306
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:53,007
- Nice.
- I had Gwyneth Paltrow on.

307
00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:55,635
Oh, my God, I think I heard that.

308
00:18:55,718 --> 00:18:57,553
No, how a good gut biome
prevents dementia.

309
00:18:57,637 --> 00:18:58,679
- Yes!
- Yeah.

310
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:00,598
- Thank you! That's exactly--
- It was so good. Yeah.

311
00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:07,021
Well, my dear, have you changed your mind?

312
00:19:07,104 --> 00:19:09,565
Is the choice still sex with you or death?

313
00:19:09,649 --> 00:19:11,150
Wook, I'm not a monster.

314
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:15,529
I'm just proposing we have a nice dinner,
watch a movie, see what unfolds.

315
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:18,616
- Kill me.
- Give us a minute.

316
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:30,044
Wook. Being the ruler
of a post-apocalyptic fiefdom can be...

317
00:19:31,212 --> 00:19:32,630
very wonely.

318
00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:35,716
- What about your harem?
- Those girls don't really care about me.

319
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:39,595
They're just here for the food,
medicine, free childcare.

320
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:44,975
You know what?

321
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:48,020
Fine. I will have dinner with you.

322
00:19:48,813 --> 00:19:51,732
- Wonderful.
- You'll have to untie me first.

323
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:56,821
A real relationship is built on trust.
That has to start now.

324
00:19:59,865 --> 00:20:03,327
Okay. Hey, you wike venison?

325
00:20:03,411 --> 00:20:08,290
I make it with a cherwy gwaze.
The key is low-heat weduction.

326
00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:18,426
You are a stupid, stupid,
stupid, stupid, stupid man!

327
00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:32,189
Stay healthy.

328
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:34,900
You too!

329
00:20:38,362 --> 00:20:39,363
Stuart!

330
00:20:39,447 --> 00:20:42,158
- I'm so glad you're okay.
- I'm so glad you're okay.

331
00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:47,413
Sorry. I'm covered with people.

332
00:20:48,038 --> 00:20:51,041
Yeah, everybody's okay. Let's go!

333
00:20:57,548 --> 00:21:01,218
- Thank God for geology!
- I do every day.

334
00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:04,096
There it is.

335
00:21:04,513 --> 00:21:06,015
Really? It looks like one
of those bread machines

336
00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:07,224
from Williams Sonoma.

337
00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:10,352
It's a vari-state
quantum interference device!

338
00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:11,520
Could be both.

339
00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:13,939
- Can you fix it?
- Yes, I think so.

340
00:21:14,023 --> 00:21:15,858
Calibration is off.

341
00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:20,738
- Gotta reconfigure. Change the inputs.
- What's supposed to happen?

342
00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:23,073
Does everything just go back
to the way it was?

343
00:21:23,157 --> 00:21:24,992
Yeah, fingers crossed.

344
00:21:25,075 --> 00:21:27,119
That would mean
you and I would be together again.

345
00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:29,330
Slow down, champ. I'm still grieving.

346
00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:31,707
I think I got it!

347
00:21:34,835 --> 00:21:36,462
He don't got it.

348
00:21:36,545 --> 00:21:41,133
Barry, what did you do?
We're trying to fix the universe!

349
00:21:41,217 --> 00:21:43,677
I don't want it fixed!
I wike it the way it is.

350
00:21:43,761 --> 00:21:45,054
We don't.

351
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:51,519
- Raj, talk to me, buddy!
- I'm okay. I'm okay.

352
00:21:52,937 --> 00:21:54,396
Maybe not.

353
00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:57,233
Raj?

354
00:22:00,444 --> 00:22:02,571
What do we do? How do we fix the machine?

355
00:22:02,655 --> 00:22:04,240
Look!

356
00:22:04,323 --> 00:22:08,285
It's my grandmother, Ambulu,
beckoning me to join her!

357
00:22:08,953 --> 00:22:10,371
Ca... Can... Can she wait a minute?

358
00:22:11,330 --> 00:22:13,207
- Apparently not.
- Okay.

359
00:22:15,793 --> 00:22:19,421
- What do we do? What do we do?
- Set the impedance to point seven.

360
00:22:19,505 --> 00:22:22,383
- The what?
- Yeah, right here.

361
00:22:25,302 --> 00:22:26,804
Okay...

362
00:22:26,887 --> 00:22:30,057
- Disengage the attenuator.
- Okay.

363
00:22:33,978 --> 00:22:35,813
- Okay.
- Turn the main release.

364
00:22:44,071 --> 00:22:45,990
- Done!
- But first...

365
00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:48,200
"But first"?
What do you mean, "But first"?

366
00:22:54,290 --> 00:22:55,749
This is upsetting!

367
00:22:57,960 --> 00:22:59,169
Should it be glowing?

368
00:23:16,854 --> 00:23:17,980
Bert, stop.

369
00:23:21,275 --> 00:23:23,277
No zombies, no moths.

370
00:23:24,945 --> 00:23:26,155
No apocalypse.

371
00:23:31,952 --> 00:23:33,412
It worked.

372
00:23:35,164 --> 00:23:36,498
Look how beautiful.

373
00:23:37,708 --> 00:23:40,252
Wats, my weign has ended.

374
00:23:41,962 --> 00:23:45,382
- Hey, your bruises are gone.
- Oh, yeah.

375
00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:49,178
You wook good. I mean... for you.

376
00:23:50,387 --> 00:23:52,640
- Where's Denise?
- I don't know.

377
00:23:54,183 --> 00:23:55,726
I can't lose her again.

378
00:23:55,809 --> 00:24:00,189
Don't worry, she's out there,
and we'll find her.

379
00:24:02,024 --> 00:24:04,068
Everything's back to normal.