Shatner: Previously, 12 celebrities embarked
On an unprecedented experiment.
Their mission--
To find out if they could survive life on mars.
Hey, do I look like a real astronaut?
Oh, god!
- Wow, this is exciting. - Hi.
He is lance armstrong, a real astronaut.
Shatner: This is a 24-day experiment
Which will test which celebrities are the strongest,
- The brightest... - Ooh. We have a squeegee?
- Yes! - ...The bravest.
( whimpering ) I'm gonna die.
Who can handle the stress...
- The mental side of this is torture. - ...And isolation?
Ronda: It's the longest I've ever been away from my baby.
- I just miss her so much. - You are killing me.
Shatner: Those not critical to the mars simulation
Will be extracted and sent home every 48 hours.
Now 11 celebrities remain.
You're walking! Run your ( bleep )!
( indistinct chatter )
- Boom! - Oh!
Only one will make it to the end to earn the title
Brightest star in the galaxy.
This is "stars on mars."
( music playing )
Computer: Good morning, crewmembers.
Please get ready for a new day on mars.
Stand by for instructions.
- Good morning. - Good morning.
- How did you sleep? - It was better today.
- You did? - Yeah.
- Morning. - Good morning.
You look refreshed. It's sol day three,
And there's 11 of us left
To continue deep into this experiment
Here on mars.
Hopefully there's no emergencies today, yeah? Nice chill day.
I would beg for that to happen.
We're here on mars for, like, a month,
And it's gonna be hard.
I wonder what-- we're gonna do something today though, for sure.
Yeah.
Our first mission, it was absolute pandemonium,
And we're exhausted.
I'm just hoping there's no emergencies.
You never know what's gonna happen.
Computer: In your downtime, you must keep the hab in order.
Water and rations are limited.
Use them wisely.
- Hey, rowdy. - What up?
- Making a compost. - Okay.
- Do you need help? - Would you like to help?
Whatever you need.
I am nervous about the food situation.
( sighs )
We don't have enough rations to last as long
As we need them to last.
Okay. Already give them a little life.
Ronda: Yes, give them a little zhuzh.
But really cool we're growing stuff.
Like, what?
Never done that in my life.
( whistling )
Got a green thumb.
There's nothing familiar about any of this because you're on mars.
You feel very-- very far from home.
All right, carrots watered.
We've had two days with marshawn as base commander.
Hey, good morning.
Marshawn's reign is coming to an end.
Dude.
( laughing )
The king has come out of his bedroom.
Being base commander, it's a status symbol.
- Good morning, young lady. - Morning.
It's like having a rolls-royce on mars. It's cool.
- Charged up. Ready to go. - There you go, commander.
Marshawn: As of right now, I don't think nobody
Doubting me as a commander, you feel me?
I'ma stay right here where I'm at.
If I just gotta delegate to certain individuals
To get ( bleep ) done, it just makes sense.
( whistles )
Hang on, I gotta go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.
The first morning, I asked marshawn
If I could borrow his bathroom
Just 'cause it's more private.
And of course he said no.
( toilet flushing )
But his bathroom was just right there.
So I borrowed his bathroom.
- ( indistinct chatter ) - thanks, bro.
Oh, you ( bleeping )!
No! Bring your little old ( bleep )--
- It's pungent. - If I see doo-doo stains in my toilet,
I'm gonna find lance.
All right, for the support of everyone,
Let's just pause on the ( bleep ) situation!
I feel we need a little bit less frenetic energy
So that people's nervous systems are a little calmer.
I would definitely like to be in a leadership role.
No, the commander can be eliminated.
The mission specialist is the only one who's safe.
Ronda: I was honestly inspired to be part of this experiment
Because I was one of those kids that wanted to be an astronaut.
If I was named base commander, that would be really cool.
Wouldn't that be cool? I would love that.
Time to pick another base commander.
Tom: There's no chance I'm ever gonna be base commander.
Last mission, I was in the bottom three.
- I like doing grunt work. - Me, too.
- Send me out in the dirt again. - I like to be the grunt.
Yeah.
You know? I might be--
I might be too passive.
( laughs )
( alarm blaring )
Uh-oh!
- Uh-oh! - Thank god.
Damn it.
T-lulu! Where my right hand at?
I'm sitting in the thing? Okay.
- Yeah, I need you at my right hand side. - Okay.
Computer: Attention, all crew,
It is time to choose a new base commander.
- You heard what he said! - ( bleep )
The new base commander will be in charge of the entire hab
And its crew for the next 48 hours.
You know what? I'm gonna make this simple.
Do we have to wrestle for it? What the hell?
Yeah, I throw hands, baby.
Marshawn has offered to wrestle for the position.
He wasn't really up for discussion for it.
All right, you wanna fight for base commander? All right.
- Oh, my god. Are they serious? - My money's on ronda.
Marshawn lynch versus ronda rousey.
I'm seeing it for free on mars. This should be on pay-per-view.
( laughing )
- I'll get him! Look at him! - You got it!
- I'm gonna get-- aah! - ( cheering )
- He's surprisingly balanced! - Let's go!
- Get him, ronda! - There we go! There we go!
- ( laughing ) - she got him!
- Who's your new commander? - Commander!
Ronda won, of course.
But we're all pretty resolute
That would definitely be easier to vote.
I'm a nomination.
You know, I feel like I've been underestimated in this competition thus far,
And I'd like the opportunity to prove myself as base commander.
Okay! All right! Okay!
So we need to split up in groups and talk about this?
- Yes. - I think that'd be a good idea.
So there's a lot of pros and cons to a lot of people.
I know. I'm telling you, I vote me.
Porsha: So why do you think you should be commander?
Marshawn: Are we here to complete missions?
- But efficiently. - Okay, we're gonna establish that you're not going
- To be the next base commander. - Y'all ain't voting me back commander?
No! Nobody is voting you back!
It's been very obvious
That marshawn doesn't put the most effort in,
Which is really hard on the team.
She all-- damn, you getting all in the kool-aid.
Porsha: Tinashe has been in the field.
Imagine somebody having that experience and now they're in-house,
So they know what we're going through on the ground
- And they're in here. - 1,000%.
- Okay. Okay, I kind of like that. - I'm very decisive.
Uh-huh.
So your proposition is that
You be promoted to base commander?
The way that marshawn presented it,
I was the one really running it
And in control of everything.
- Oh! - I thought you were so clear.
You were great as mission specialist.
I think you'd be a great base commander.
Tallulah: I know there was some people
Campaigning for me to be base commander.
I'm feeling such an overwhelming sense of gratitude.
Well, if comms was our biggest hold-up in the last mission,
I heard every single word of tallulah's encouraging haikus,
So I feel like she already proved
- That she can come through on the comms. - Sure.
Ronda: If I'm not picked, then, I mean, I love tallulah
And she would really shine as base commander
Because she's just so articulate.
And I think it would be fun to see her shine.
But if she's out there in the desert, you know what I mean?
She might see a martian butterfly and be like, "I love butterflies."
And, like, we'll never see her.
Then our next mission is to do the body retrieval.
- I agree, again. - ( indistinct chatter )
Computer: Crew, it's time to vote
For your next base commander.
In this experiment,
It's so funny because it's a social game.
When we spend this much time in the hab together,
You have to build that social bond.
But at the same time,
We're all competing against each other.
( sighs )
Marshawn: All right, so after a long, uh...
- I tried. - ...Discussion...
Deliberation?
...Of who should be the new base commander...
Got my copilot, you understand me?
- Tallulah. - ( cheering )
Yay!
Tallulah: When they named me base commander,
I just looked around at these wonderful human beings
Just smiling and cheering for me,
And I just felt so celebrated and loved.
I don't know what prepared me for this,
But I've been waiting my whole life to show up for it,
- And I'm really excited. - Yes!
That was a good vote.
When we get a new base commander,
People start thinking, "oh, wait a minute.
What's the pecking order?"
Are you gonna be taking over the commander's suite?
I don't need to because I love sleeping with the girls in the room.
- Okay. - Oh, you best.
Man, get to keep my pad. Yeah!
And somehow, some way, he done kept the room.
Hey, man, all I'm gonna say is like this.
Tallulah gonna be good because she's overcome a lot of things.
I think that's the perfect spot for her.
I just-- I'm holding you all in my heart chakra.
Aww, you the best.
I think she's got a unique way about her,
And I think we all thought that some of the physical stuff
Would be a little harder for her.
I don't know.
Adam: Tallulah is somebody so authentically themselves
And so apologetically quirky and lovely.
Yeah, this can go horribly wrong.
Shatner: Coming up...
We have no running water.
This is the worst thing to ever.
Shatner: The good news?
There's frozen water locked away
Deep under the surface of mars.
I just saw, "whoo!"
( whimpering ) okay.
Look at me. Look at me.
Marshawn, do you copy?
( humming )
Marshawn, do you copy?
Tallulah is base commander right now.
And we are waiting to find out what to do,
- And she's in the bedroom just chilling. - She's the house mom.
She's just been napping ever sense.
- I know. I love it. - She is so funny.
Waiting for tallulah is actually a gift for me
Because I think it's really important
To really get to know my fellow teammates.
So my friend said she watches every episode of "vanderpump rules."
Oh, man. They say that it puts their relationship problems
In perspective when they watch the trainwreck
That is sometimes our lives, you know what I mean?
'cause she was like, "is he this tom or this tom?"
Because the other tom, she said, like--
He's had-- he had a torrid affair.
It's horrible, and I feel complicit
Because I didn't cover for him, but I had his back.
He came to me and confided in me
That he was in love with someone else.
My friend had an affair that just happened
To sweep the nation, and it's incredibly messed up.
But the thing is, I've become mired in it.
That's been a huge source of just angst in my life.
I've been in this extended funk.
- And then I got divorced. - You're divorced?
Yeah, I got divorced. I mean, listen,
I'll take most of the responsibility for that.
But for whatever reason, now that I am divorced,
Like, I had my ( bleep ) together, natasha. I felt like I did.
I don't know what it is, but now I feel like
I'm in some sort of form arrested development.
- I liked being married. - Yeah.
- The pandemic was kind of rough.
It was good for our marriage, I think.
- It was fun. - Why? It ended in divorce.
( vibrating )
( creaking )
Computer: Tallulah, you are responsible
For everything from cleanliness to survival to fitness.
My sweet crew, is everyone in here?
It's now time for you to assign base duties and stay alert.
Emergencies can happen at any time.
Can you get everyone to listen to me for a second?
- Are you serious? - Yeah.
Ay, ay, ay! Check it out, check it out, check it out!
Come on in, my buddy! Just gonna sit down for one sec.
- Cleaning the kitchen. - That would be so awesome.
First of all, I'm so grateful to be here.
Thank you, guys, so much.
It's sol day three, and here are the duties
That you guys are gonna do for the afternoon.
Tom and ariel, you're gonna go outside and clean the solar panels
And keep power flowing to the hab.
Porsha and lance are required
To conduct health and well-being checks.
That's it. Sol day three.
- We're all killing it! - ( laughs )
I put porsha and lance in charge
Of doing wellness checks.
I'm gonna go first.
- Oh, you're gonna go first? - Yeah.
To me, there is nothing more important
Than the well-being of my crew.
- Let me show you what we're doing, lance. - Okay.
Okay, so the first one is blood pressure, uh-huh.
All right, so her blood pressure is 119/81.
- Got it. - You know that's dead, right?
- Yeah. - That's dead?
- Huh? No, it's not. - Yes, it is.
- ( laughing ) - okay.
I don't hear anything.
- Maybe 'cause you don't got the damn things in your ear. - Oh!
We all dead.
So, commander, you're a lot better than you were yesterday.
I'm feeling good. I'm feeling rested.
- I'm feeling really grateful. Feeling gratitude. - Okay. Yeah. Love it.
- Whoo! - One of your ears is hot and the other one is cold.
- All right, I feel good. - You are completely healthy.
- We're good. You're good. - I feel great. I'm proud of my team.
- Yeah, doing-- - guys, you're killing it.
I'm gonna have everyone come in here, too.
- Porsha: Okay. - And file them in.
Thank you. And we'll get it done a lot quicker, captain.
- Yeah, yeah. - Love y'all!
Tallulah's very open, and what's cool about her
Is she really anticipates needs.
And I think that's an excellent quality in a leader,
Something you don't always see.
Now, adam, how would you rate your happiness
- On a scale of one to ten? - Ten.
- Winner, winner, chicken dinner. - Porsha: Yes, that's high!
I've never been happier.
- Aww! - That's cool.
You've never been happier? That's so good to know.
- That's amazing. - Your temperature is healthy.
Good.
Computer: Bio dome team, your task today
Is to fertilize the food crops.
- You want more water? I'll fill this back up. - Perfect. Thank you.
Ronda: Getting dirty with the plants, I love it.
I think that little area's gonna become really important
For me to harness my chi and take a deep breath
And just watch things grow.
Computer: Mars' natural resources are precious.
( humming )
Water and sunlight are essential for your survival.
All right.
All related systems must be maintained at all times.
Ariel: So how you feeling, tom?
Well, here's the thing here, ariel.
I'm so grateful to be here.
But that being said,
Mars sucks.
( sighs )
This thing is dirty.
Alrighty. Let's get it to friggin' work.
- ( panting ) - how you feeling?
I am struggling.
It's definitely uncomfortable, but it's confidence building.
You know, out of comfort zone, so...
We're doing it though. Yeah. We're doing the damn thing.
And it's hot as balls in here.
Oh, ( bleep ).
Ariel: Life on mars is hard.
The suit's over half my bodyweight,
And I'm trying to clean something
And I'm way too short for this.
I definitely would much rather be commander because this--
This is a wtf if I've ever had one.
- Okay, good. I think it's clean enough. - I think it's clean enough.
Whew!
Should I save the excess water?
Yeah, I mean, I guess we don't need it. Just dump it.
( sighs ) watch out for the hole.
Computer: Prepare for decontamination.
Hit me with it, baby.
( creaking )
( beeping )
( bleep ) is that?
( creaking )
( grunting )
Tom: So we get back to the hab.
- There you go. Yeah. - Thank you.
We're dirty, stinky-- at least I am.
Covered in martian dust again. That's okay.
'cause we're gonna take a nice shower.
Oh, the water doesn't ( bleep ) work.
Gonna need water.
We have no running water.
- Ariel? - Yeah?
- Is your water working? - I don't know. Let me look.
It's not working!
Not having water on mars is...
- It's not okay. - ( indistinct chatter )
The water's off. I can't even wash my ( bleep ) hands.
I know. This is the worst thing to ever.
This is a nightmare situation.
- I can't even wash my hands. - Unacceptable.
Can we flush toilets?
You can flush it once.
( alarm blaring )
Computer: Incoming message from mission control.
Okay. Everybody!
All crew, report to the command center.
We're all here! We're all here!
Come on. All right, everyone listen up!
- Listen up, please! - Shatty daddy!
- Oh. - Oh!
Hello, mars crew, how's it going?
Don't answer that. I can't hear you.
- I'm just being polite. - Okay.
Shatner: There's been a steam eruption
At the hab's exterior water filtration unit.
Your water supply has already run out.
- Water? - Gross! I'm so nasty!
The good news, there's frozen water locked away deep under the surface of mars.
The bad news? You have to get it.
- ( gasps ) - tonight?
Shatner: And it's not gonna be easy.
Ooh, jeez.
I'm downloading all of the information
For your base commander now.
They are in charge and will determine
Who is mission critical and who is not.
Oh, and if you fail, your base commander is up for extraction as well.
This mission will test your leadership skills
And will earn you a mission patch.
Commander, you need a mission specialist by your side,
And remember that they will be safe from extraction.
Your training has prepared you for this mo-- oh?
What? They haven't been trained?
Oh. At all?
- Okay. Good luck. - Oh, my god!
- Okay. Thank you. - He killed it.
- I love that. - Love him.
Computer: Base commander,
You must pick a mission specialist.
This is a big deal because we chose tallulah
To be the commander because we want her energy.
So that means that the second commander
Is like, okay, the real deal.
So, like, this is a serious vote.
You had me in the first half, and then...
As base commander,
I wanna do a really good job.
I need a mission specialist who is a team player.
I mean, this is no joke.
I'd like to throw my hand in the ring.
I get her. She's my bunkmate.
And I can kind of translate when she gets too woo-woo
And no one knows what she's talking about
Even though she's the main person in charge.
I'll be able to translate that.
To be honest, I just don't wanna go out on mars.
I'd like to stay in and just order people around on the microphone.
As base commander, I choose natasha.
- ( cheering ) - I mean, shotgun!
Tallulah: Me and natasha are ready to give this a go.
Very confident that we can get this done, because we have to.
( alarm blaring )
Computer: Crew, prepare for deployment.
Departure in two minutes.
- ( indistinct chatter ) - ( alarm continues )
Richard: We done ran out of water on mars,
So we gotta go make this happen.
Let's go, let's go, let's go!
All right, guys, let's get this water.
Ariel: I can't really believe I'm on mars doing missions.
This whole experience isn't something you get every day.
Team, do you hear me?
- Yes. - Copy.
We need you to rappel down a cliff,
Extract water from the roof of the cave system,
And then pump it up to the surface.
Oh, my god. This is amazing!
( cheering, laughing )
I just saw, "whoo!"
It just dropped off.
I thought it was, like, 500 feet down.
Computer: Base commander,
Select two crew members to stay up top
And receive water.
The remaining crew will rappel down into the caves
To pump water up.
We would like two of the crew to be adam and ariel.
So just to confirm, the people who are currently scheduled to go down
Are comfortable and happy to go into the cave?
No, marshawn is not going in no cave.
Marshawn: I'm not rappelling off the side into no cave
Where I don't know if there's no snakes or spiders in that thing.
If marshawn doesn't wanna go down,
- Then he can switch with adam. - Yep.
Okay, so you're ready to go.
If we can have lance and porsha to go start towards the cliff
To start rappelling down.
Porsha: Oh, gosh, that is a big cliff.
I was called upon to go off a cliff
To go down into the caves to get the water, okay?
But I have a fear of heights, a very real fear of heights.
- You got this, girl. - ( whimpering )
- Okay. - We're here for you.
We're gonna have to switch hands when you turn around, okay?
Okay.
Just walk-- walk straight back.
( whimpering )
Computer: Seven crew must rappel down to the cave,
Collect the water, and pump it to the surface.
I was called upon to go off a cliff
To go down into the caves to get the water, okay?
But I have a fear of heights, a very real fear of heights.
( whimpering )
( continues whimpering )
- You got it? - Yeah.
( whimpering )
You got it. Don't look back. Nope, you don't need to.
Yeah.
( whimpering )
You got it. You got it, porsha.
( whimpering )
- Okay. - It's got you. It's got you.
You're doing amazing. You're doing amazing.
Wait, my feet are leaving. Hold on, my feet--
- Hold on, my feet are leaving the wall. - Walk your feet back.
Walk your feet-- look at me. Look at me.
- Hold on. My feet are leaving the wall. - Look over here. That's okay.
( gasping )
- ( bleeping ) - now you've gotten it. Now you getting it, porsha.
It's not going to let you go.
Good girl, porsha. Stay relaxed.
- Yes, good. Just relax. - You got it.
- There you go. - There you go, porsha.
- There you go. - Tallulah: Yeah!
You got it. Keep breathing.
This was the most terrifying thing I have ever done.
I just felt a total accomplishment.
- Adam: You got it. You got it. - I didn't tell y'all I was afraid of heights.
We need adam and richard on deck to rappel next.
- Let's go, adam! - I look like gay buzz lightyear.
( laughter )
Oh, my god, you guys.
- It's amazing. - Yeah!
Whoo!
Tom, you'll be going down alone.
Ariel and marshawn, you will be staying up.
- Is it big down there? - It's huge. It's huge.
- It's huge. - It's like a big gulch.
Oh, then, yeah, I wanna go.
Does someone wanna stay here instead of me?
I just wanna do something. Like, if it's not--
- Ariel, you have a big job. - It's just not happening yet.
I just really wanted to do something
That I would never normally do
And push myself out of my comfort zone,
And so I volunteered to do it.
Uh, base commander, I'm happy to relinquish my duty.
I think ariel's experiencing a little fomo.
I felt like it was a big moment for her,
And I wanted her to have that moment.
Having strong crew in the cave is recommended.
- Are we wasting tom? - No, no, I mean, I think that's--
Um-- ( sighs )
Are we focused on the mission?
All right, ariel, start rappelling down.
Don't worry if you slip a little.
There you go. You got this, girl. You doing it.
You're doing it. You're doing it.
Yep, you're in the safe zone now.
Computer: Descent complete.
Initiate water extraction mission.
Are you ready to go into that cave and kick some ass?
- Yeah! - Born that way, baby!
We are going to utilize a microwave extracting device
To melt the ice to get the water from the ice into a bucket
That pumps up to the surface where tom and marshawn
- Will have them into containment buckets. - Copy that.
Tom or marshawn, please copy.
( drumming )
( humming )
Marshawn, do you copy? Marshawn, do you copy?
Hey, this is tom and marshawn standing by.
We don't have water up here yet.
( humming )
Natasha: Lance, there's gonna be
The funneling and the catch-all.
You wanna move back and create almost like a long slide.
Exactly.
This isn't rocket science.
The water's up there, the tarp is here.
It all goes like this, and just get it in the barrel.
Tallulah: You will have 20 minutes of ice flow.
For the mission to be a success,
Extract all the water into four containment buckets
Or else the mission is a failure.
We're ready for the button to be pushed.
It's on. It's green.
Computer: Microwave emitter activated.
- Commander, what do we do? - Tallulah: Catch the water.
Catch the water as best you can.
Don't let that get heavy.
Let's go towards richard a little bit.
- Move this way. - Wait, it's coming out the middle.
Go back. Move back. Move the tarp.
As the water pools up, the tarp goes from being
Basically weightless to being 10 pounds, 15 pounds.
So then everybody had to figure out how to hold the tarp without losing water.
Oh, ( bleep ). It's hard.
- Keep going. - All right. We got this, guys. We're doing it.
- Shatty daddy gonna be so proud. - Good work.
Ay, the buckets is filling!
Tom: We got water. We got water.
Okay, tom, marshawn, when it gets to the fill line,
We gotta go to the next barrel.
Got you.
I'm so impressed by you guys, and really incredible work.
Natasha: My role in today's mission
Is mostly to translate
What tallulah is telling them
In case there's any confusion from her constant positivity.
Okay, team, you have 14 minutes left.
- Anybody know how much water we need? - No, but more. More.
With the way marshawn takes showers, we're gonna need more than this.
Tom: Yeah, we got water! We got our first barrel.
Tallulah: Okay, we are one quarter of the way there, you guys.
The water's still filling. It's good.
Marshawn's filling up the second barrel as we speak.
- This-- put this part higher. - Higher?
I can't hold it above my head.
Tinashe: We're physically exhausted,
We are soaking wet,
But I tried my best.
( stammering )
We have 3 1/2 barrels.
Tallulah: We got six minutes left, and you're killing it.
You guys have minutes to spare, to party and talk,
And get to know each other even more.
It's gonna feel so good when we shower after this though.
Ariel: Oh, no! The water's getting out!
- Could someone help me do this? - Somebody assist ariel.
Natasha: We were definitely gonna win this mission,
And then the pipes disconnected.
And hopefully when my daughter watches it,
She'll think I did a great job sitting there doing nothing.
We have 3 1/2 barrels.
- Holy ( bleep ). - Yes.
We got six minutes left, and you're killing it.
Ariel: Oh, no! The water's getting out!
- ( grunting ) - it's gonna be heavy.
Can someone help me do this?
We're losing water pressure up here.
- Help me with the pipe! - Somebody assist ariel.
Can you please help with the water point, the funnel pipe?
I'm coming, I'm coming. I'm coming, I'm coming.
Yeah, I think I knew how physical it was going to be,
I maybe wouldn't have switched with tom.
( bleep )
How much water do you think they lost?
The tank has to be all the way full.
We need to lift this up higher.
We lost, I think, a lot of water.
- I got it! - We got it. The pipe's connected.
- Let the water through. - Expose as much tarp as we can.
Bam. Water.
Oh, ( bleep ). We're back up. We're back up.
Let's just try to catch everything.
Tallulah: We got two minutes on time.
Base command. Base command, this is schwartz.
What's the minimum we need?
Tom, it's four to complete the mission.
- We have 2 1/2 buckets. - What?
- You said you had 3 1/2. - I misspoke. We have 2 1/2 barrels.
Tom misspoke.
Quite honestly, this is one of the reasons why I wanted ariel on top.
She's super smart,
And I really don't think ariel would've messed that up.
You know, I haven't showered. I haven't had any water all day.
No big deal. Just some extra gallons unaccounted for.
I'm sure we'll be fine, you know?
Natasha: We've got 30 seconds left.
Marshawn, is the third bucket full?
- No. - We're filling up the third.
- Okay, come on. - Tight and high.
- Yes, water's coming! Yes! - No wasted drops.
- We need that water pushed in. - All right.
Ten seconds, you guys.
We are close to the third bucket being full.
About to transfer to the fourth bucket.
- Time. - ( buzzer )
Computer: Ice deposit depleted.
Three of four water barrels collected.
Mission failed.
( radio chatter )
We're done. No more water.
( bleep )
I'm so sorry, you guys.
( sighs )
Tinashe: I think having that switch happen,
That was a big fumble on the part of tallulah.
That was a big fumble.
All right, let's go. Hey, pack it up, everybody. Pack it up.
- Well, we got three buckets. - I thought we had 3 1/2.
Hey, it happens like that sometimes.
Chin up. Chest up. Let's go.
( alarm blaring )
Computer: Tallulah, this mission has failed.
Go to the outer airlock.
Natasha, you are now in command.
Tallulah: The mission did fail.
As base commander, that does mean that I am up for elimination.
Yeah, it's hard not to feel
Like did I let them down?
Computer: A failed mission means no patches will be awarded.
- Mission commander, what are you doing here? - With the outfit on?
And who wants to send tallulah home?
Like, that's the sweetest person ever.
It's like having to part with your favorite teddy bear.
- ( beeping ) - computer: Incoming message from mission control.
Tough luck, crew. The mission failed.
Damn it.
Mission specialist, it's time for a difficult decision.
There is not enough water for everyone.
Which crew member is not mission critical?
Sorry, shatty daddy.
It's sad every time we come back
Because we know someone's going to have to go,
And I think we've become such a tight-knit group.
Natasha: The first person who is mission critical...
Ariel.
( cheering )
- Great job. Mish crit. - Hey!
You got a great attitude, killed it.
Am I getting blast--
- Ooh. - Yes, I'm getting blasted.
- The next person-- tinashe! - ( cheering )
Tinashe, you were so brave. You just did it.
I think that everyone who was in the cave today
Was extremely mission critical.
Natasha: Richard. Sir richard.
( cheering )
Ronda rousey!
Ronda: This was all hands on deck,
Everyone working their ass off.
Natasha: Miss porsha.
- Yes! - Adam.
- ( cheering ) - whoo!
Natasha: And the last person
Who has proven to be mission critical,
Let's give it up for lancé.
- ( cheering ) - be-lancé in the house.
If I had to pick an mvp today for our team--
Let me think about it.
Yeah, definitely me.
Tom: I gotta be honest. Being the bottom three again, it kind of sucks.
Okay, I misspoke once.
Marshawn: You know, my job was pretty self-explanatory.
Put the hose in the bucket.
And if I didn't do a good enough job for that,
Then it is what it is.
Tallulah: I really tried to give it my all.
And that's the thing, I think that no matter what,
I know I've stayed true to myself
And I know that I care about these wonderful human beings.
Computer: Enter the decontamination zone.
- Uh-oh. - So we need to decide now
Between tallulah, tom, and marshawn.
Who do we find the least mission critical?
This isn't just, like, a social retreat.
We're here to survive on mars.
Ariel: You gotta think about what type of person
That could help us out for future missions.
Okay, tallulah, can you tell me why you're mission critical?
I care about your experience out there.
I care about how you feel.
To some, that might not be critical
To completing the mission.
Clearly, I didn't, which I acknowledge.
And, really, I just love hanging out with you guys.
- That's it. - When tom and ariel decided to switch,
I would've expected the commander to say,
"wait a minute. This is very physical."
To say, "you know what? No, tom. You cannot switch with her."
I was trying to say I wanted richard and tom to be holding the sticks.
- Okay, marshawn. - I am mission critical because I did my part of the mission.
- Natasha: Okay. - He did. He did.
One big con, let's be honest,
He wasn't going backwards over the cliff.
- Heights aren't for everybody. - Right.
Natasha: Tom, do you feel bad
That you got the amount of barrels wrong?
Yes, I misspoke.
Honestly, tom counted the water buckets wrong.
Which is really crazy, 'cause how do you count to four wrong?
- I don't know how that happens. - Here's the thing though.
I'm kind of glasses half full kind of guy.
- So, you know... - ( laughing )
- Tom: I just... - So that was just you being positive?
- Yeah. - Okay. That is a good answer.
Yeah, I don't see a way you can kick guys off
Who did the only job they could do at the time
- That was asked of them. - Natasha: I hear you.
Ronda: And if you're the leader,
Even if it's not your fault, even it's nobody's fault,
- Any failure is on your shoulders, you know? - Adam: Yeah, it falls you.
- Ronda: That's part of being the leader. - Natasha: Yeah, I understand.
Okay, we made a decision as a crew.
Marshawn, you were mission critical.
- Woohoo! - Whoo!
Ronda: I don't know if marshawn did a very good job
- Of selling himself. - What's up? What's up?
But I also think he didn't really need to, you know?
You don't stay on mars because you're good at selling yourself.
You stay on mars because if we need you to lift
A ( bleep ) satellite dish, he's the guy.
- ( distant chatter ) - whoo!
- Wanna sweat it out together. - I see you, my guy.
Okay, it's down to our final two crew members,
Our base commander and tom.
- Don't look at me. - Aww, tom. Don't cry.
Tom: I think I have what it takes to survive on mars, you know?
I got at least some brains left over.
I'm physically fit.
And I'm willing to do whatever it takes
To make this mission a success.
Natasha: The last person who is mission critical
Is you, tom.
- I did my best. - Computer: Tallulah, you are not mission critical
And must leave the hab immediately.
( music playing )
I love you all. I love you all.
- We love you. - We love you, too!
Tinashe: At the end of the day,
The only person that we could blame
Was the leadership.
Tallulah: The most challenging part for me
Was really underestimating the physical abilities
Needed for the missions.
So that created a lot of anxiety and panic for me.
Not only did I make it work and find leadership
Capabilities within myself I didn't know were there,
I found joy and deep connections with people.
I am very proud of myself.
Yeah! So, yeah! Yeah!
You live fight another day, tom!
Whoo! My god. Back to back chopping blocks?
- Makes you stronger though. - Can I go in the shower now?
Yeah, we're gonna let everyone shower. People are pretty uncomfortable.
Tom: I have martian dust in every orifice in my entire body,
And we're low on water, but we've got just enough to take a shower.
- Tommy! Shower time! - ( cheering )
And after that, who knows what's gonna happen, you know?
Shatner: Next time on "stars on mars..."
- ( gasping ) - ( screaming, laughing )
- It's an alien! - Hey, I ain't giving up this room though.
- You're no longer the commander. - Oh!
Fire! Oh, my god, there's a fire!
It's moving fast! There's a fire!
Computer: Evacuate immediately.
Every day something.
Go, go!
- ( indistinct chatter ) - ( screaming )
A fire? We've been so careful.
Feels like it's gonna be a long day.